#it will be a while before i post the finished one but youll see

[arom-antix]

Scuffed Tamagotchi hour

[skitskatdacat63]

Boy King Seb :D

[sorikkung]

people interacting w wgoin in my notes... this would be a rly bad time to say all my writing will probably be on hiatus for the indefinite future huh

[cardboardclownery]

CRASHES THROUGH A BRICK WALL

HI HI IM ALIVE!!!! sorry for the relative radio silence on here ;v;

on the topic of that actually!!!! finally have a proper folie a deux au update for you!! though its slightly different than expected?

me and professional buddy and fellow au creator @cookiecaker decided to share a summary of the story we're making for the au beforehand since we'll be taking a whileeee to finish it,,, got a lot of life to live and horrors to create "-v-

after this though you mayyyy or may notttt see some out of order chapter drafts posted for the story as well,,, or atleast one? eh youll see ;Pc

ANYWAYS!!!! this is gonna take a while so lets get on with...

THE FOLIE À DEUX DOAI AU

a summary!!

or story pitch? idk-

(cookie please lemme know if i miss or improperly describe anything here feel free to correct me-)

PART 1

the first three chapters follow alex just after the end of volume 1 as theyre abducted by lankmann and confined to his asylum as a "patient." eventually they get sent to winfrey as food, but winfrey refuses to eat them. theyre left to die in room 66 by lankmann for a Long While, until eventually he gives up and just puts alex back in their room

while alone in confinement, alex starts noticing strange things happening... dark patches start appearing on their skin, they get random pains as if someone were kicking them, and they hear a voice... a much clearer voice than the ones they used to hear while working in the asylum, and it seemed to be able to read their thoughts. though they originally just assumed it was due to being part of their thoughts as well, they find that they start knowing things they had no way of knowing and never learned prior to being confined. when lankmann typically entered room 66, how long hes inside, certain areas of the asylum patients found that theyd never heard of before...

this "voice" managed to help alex find a way to escape, leading to them running away and moving to another, smaller town in eastridge than the one they originally lived in to avoid lankmann's pursuit

PART 2

[ ! tw for cannibalism. yes you heard me- ! ]

so after getting far away from the asylum, alex assumes that their hallucinations and weird symptoms of... Something would wear off, since subject 02 was no where near close enough to affect them

well uh. nope! theyre still there!!

so eventually alex figures out "oh shit that thing is in my head somehow" and is obviously quite concerned!!! to say the least!!!! but theyre also oddly comforted by the idea of having The Voice in their head, since now theyre not entirely alone while on the run and i mean it helped them escape so it cant be that bad?? either way theyre not exactly excited about the whole ordeal and theyre starting to look different and theyre really hungry all the time and its not fun

so! at some point (with winfreys suggestion) alex decides to run off to another town a bit farther away just to be safe. but Uh Oh theyre all out of food!! so theyre extremely hungry, forcing themself through it so they can get food when they arrive but. they see someone in the woods while walking

and for some reason that makes them even hungrier

they try to ignore it and keep walking but they cant

and the next thing they know

theyre looking down at a person

chewing off the flesh on their leg

covered in blood

even after regaining their senses they cant stop themself from eating. it tasted... so good... they were so hungry... they felt awful but it really did taste so s o g o o d .

in a haze, they discard the body, clean themself off and reach the next town. just after unpacking in an apartment, they collapse, flooded with the emotions they fought off on the way there

the next day, alex finally confronts winfrey (or winfreys voice rather-) about all their grievances and they eventually reach an understanding, as winfrey opens up about fearing the outside of the asylum despite longing to escape through alex, so they eventually agree to let winfrey pilot their body for a few days to get a feel for how the world has changed since the time winfrey had been free

in doing so, winfrey realizes how small and helpless humans are in comparison to them and how terrified the patients they devoured mustve been. this allows them to appreciate human life (specifically alex's) much more and want to escaped in their own body to join alex outside and introduce clyde to what they learned after finding it again

while piloting alexs body, winfrey is suddenly forced back into their own after lankmann inflicts enough pain to wake them from the dissociative state that piloting alex left them in. soon after this, winfrey overcomes the fear that was originally keeping them from escaping the facility and breaks out

PART 3

this section is a lot less figured out than the rest so uhh bear with me please ;v;

essentially this couple of chapters just follows alex and winfrey as they get used to life on the run, figuring out where to go from there and how they could potentially find clyde, along with just talking face to face and getting used to that. its a weird feeling talking to someone that you share thoughts with yknow? like talking to yourself but its... not... yourself...

around the start of this section winfrey also expresses that they feel drawn to feminity as a human concept, thus being referred to with they/she from this point on in the story!! transfem winfrey yippee!!! it just makes sense in our head idk-

PART 4

alex and winfrey start noticing news broadcasts and posters asking around for a "dark figure" lurking around, as well as warnings about alex being missing from lankmanns asylum. this fuels alex's paranoia, leading them to seeing lankmanns caretakers everywhere, feeling as if theyre being watched wherever they go... until eventually their home is ambushed and theyre taken back into lankmanns custody

alex is essentially used as bait to get winfrey to come save them from the asylum, since lankmann couldnt find a solid lead on where winfrey could be. alex tries to convince her not to fall for it, since they can both tell this is what lankmanns trying to do, but winfrey eventually caves and breaks back in to help alex, getting trapped inside once again

PART 5

depsite the circumstances, winfrey and alex do their best to stay determined and keep looking for a way out, but they dont make much progress. to make matters worse, lankmann tries "live feeding" patients to alex in the same way he did with winfrey due to realizing that alex has veldigun traits and assuming that theyd have the same appetite as her. this isnt the case, and eventually lankmann switches to dead patients as food for alex, which theyre forced to accept due to lacking any other options

both winfrey and alex are miserable in the situation, the helplessness sinking in fairly quickly as alexs body begins rejecting the growing veldigun portions of itself, decaying under the immense stress

during their final moments, winfrey pilots alexs body to allow an atleast somewhat peaceful death as their consciousness fades away, leaving winfrey alone to reflect on all that had happened...

...and thats the official end of the story!! i had like,, a hypothetical epilogue/alternate ending where lankmann forces a Mind Merge with winfrey somehow and then gets killed and she breaks out again but like. idk the logistics of that are iffy and i kinda prefer the more melancholy end for something like this ":]c

ANYHOW!!!! hope that was!!! something!!!! please feel free to ask questions or provide feedback or anything else im always happy to engage with my fellow freaks (affectionate) :]

ALSO IF YOU MAKE CONTENT BASED ON THIS AU LET ME KNOW I WILL DIE FOREVER alright thats it for real this time- stay safe broskissss BP

[cryptidghostgirl]

heyhey! You said you had a request but couldn’t see it and in case it was mine here i am once again humbling asking you to feed my delusions. I am the same person who asked for the one with the fake dating trope and the one where reader spawns into the lobby :))

But i am here now going for a more angsty route! >:) Granted, this is more of an OC x Alastor but im describing it more generic for the populace BUT HERE GOES

right before “Cover me” reader kept silently glancing over at Alastor which was on the dance floor, subconsciously making him approach her. He goes of course they have a (Important for later) conversation like “I havent seen you around here. Are you new around town?” “Just moved in actually~” “Well, Id love to give you a tour someday, the names Alastor” and he kisses her hand “Ah a charmer, ill have to be careful around you” (OR A MORE ELEGANT CONVERSATION THEN THAT I SUCK AT DIALOGUE) then theres the knife and gun scene and the team up

And then they get together after about a year or two and I dont wanna say theyre legally married but eventually use wife and husband terms because its more fancy and gives them more respect in eyes of others but they have been together for around 5 years at this point.

but then the events of 1925 happen where readers twin brother dies because some bastards set fire to his house and Reader has an argument with Alastor before eventually going alone to avenge her brother (theyre like “theres too many, youll die” “so be it!”)

Reader kills them all (duh) but because it was January and extremely cold she eventually gets hypothermia and during the delusions it gives she stumbles and gets impaled on an abandoned rusty fence spike and dies :3

Alastor find her and gives her a proper burial and 8 years later in 1933 while visiting readers grave he gets shot canonically

But these 8 years gave reader enoigh time in hell to establish her own dominance and due to the life she lived and the death of hypothermia- she gets turned into a sort of blizzard demon. Around 180 cm with black limbs, white fluffy hair and fluffy ears and a white tail as a sinner form and for the demon form im thinking of the faceless Room Guardians by Anyaboz on Instagram (incredible artist btw) with ice powers like summoning weapons and ice spikes and ice touches and moving freely (like Kindred’s wolf in League) in her blizzard. Taking over half the pentagram like this-

Until 1933 when Alastor pops up in hell, does his demon business and eventually wants to check out these frozen parts and goes into a bar very similar to the one they met and sees reader at the table and then THEY HAVE THE EXACT SAME CONVERSATION THEY HAD WHEN THEY FIRST MET (maybe with the knife and gun scene too hehe) and theyre both like “i forgive you” or smth idk maybe they just have a silent agreement- either way.

After they met the blizzard stops and no one knows why or who did it :>, readers identity as the blizzard demon remaining a secret

BTW I LOVE YOU FOR MAKING MY DREAMS COME TRUE- if you want more i have a ton of ideas because brain rot- (also lil side note i kind of imagine reader as albino because it would fit my ocs lore a bit more- but keeping it basic would fit everyones ideas of their own reader so! do what you please you already made my day better by reading my ideas come to life :3))

yes!! i did see yours and it is currently in third place for requests i need to fill so ill probably get it done by this weekend, early next week at the latest. it’s just taking me a bit because i’m in midterms rn and also i want to make sure i get in all the details :) i think it might’ve been a request for alastor’s mom reader x lucifer?? i recall getting one about that but can’t seem to find it anywhere. long story short,, your request is in progress and i will post it as soon as i have the time to finish it up :)

UPDATE: This piece has officially been posted as of Friday February 23rd, 2024.

Frostbite (Alastor x Reader)

[queenpinesofdomino]

You know why the conversation between Sally and Poseidon is so good and has us losing our shit?

Because of ✨context✨.

I feel like these days the majority of the scenarios don't show you the way the character feel but just the way that they act. Which sometimes those two things are different. Do you know where was the last time that a show showed us well written context behind actions and words? In that kiss scene in Good Omens.

The conversation between Sally and Poseidon is so amazing because it appears that it's just two parents talking about the future of their child, which it is, but it also turns into a conversation between a couple who still loves one another but for reasons can't be together.

Let me show you how I analysed this moment.

So here Poseidon is stating a fact. That Sally doesn't want to sent Percy away and she's responding truthfully that she doesn't. The context behind her multiple no's is :

No Im not ready to separate from him yet

No I don't like the idea of him being away from me

No I can't lose him yet because i feel it'll be like losing you again.

And now you'll say "where do you get the last one from pines?

From here.

"Tell me why" I believe has a double meaning as a sentence.

1 tell me why you can't lose him yet and get it out of your system

and

2 tell me you still love me and miss me

The way he said it with much longing and so strained, in my opinion, that I feel the context behind it is:

"Tell me why you can't lose him. Tell me that you see me in our son. Tell me you miss me because I can't tell you how I feel."

Thats why Sally says "you don't wanna hear why" and if you watch carefully youll see them chuckling a little.

She says "you don't wanna here because if I tell you we both know you'll drop everything and come to me and that can't happen."

I don't have the full subtitle here but Poseidon says

"but you have no one to say it to, and maybe that's the most unfair part of it"

Meaning you don't have any one else who understands what's like to raise a demigod and also you don't have any one else to lean on, to listen and comfort you when things get rough. And that's unfair because I want to be here for you.

And then he says the line that's literally my new roman empire

"YOU SAY IT AND I WILL LISTEN"

(screaming in a pillow)

Context "I will drop everything and come to you if you tell me to. You call me and I'll be here in seconds just like I did now"

I can't this is killing me..

Then we have Sally turning the subject again on Percy with the "I want him to know who he is, before your family tells him who they want him to be" only to counter it with

"he is better than that" and context wise I'm sure she says "you are also better than that. Than them."

I think that, because the camera points at Poseidon at than moment and the when Sally says " he has better things in him than that" she takes a little credit for her contribution into who Percy is, which honestly fuck yeah girly you deserve all the credit, and that's when the camera points at her.

Then Poseidon starts explaining her how the situation is going to be and how it'll be for both her and Percy and he finishes with this

Which also has me screaming and crying on the floor because so far is the closed he's got to look at her. So far he looks down or up front.

And he's so poud of her and I'm... I can't.... He loves her so much......

And because it's obviously a very sensitive sudject emotionally for Sally who's trying to move on or to focus on her child she changes the subject (kinda) again by asking Poseidon

And here we start seeing context purely for Poseidon

I can't post more pictures, but he turns and side looks at Percy and you can seeee that he's considering it very much. He almost says yes. It's so tempting and devastating for him. Only for Zeus to throw that thunder. At first i thought it was Poseidons thunder (as stormbringer) to represent his inner conflict but while I was waiting for it to be heard I noticed that it took to long and that his face didnt show resignation until after it struck. So I strongly believe that, that was Zeus warning him about interving.

And thus we reach the ending monologue where Poseidon states that when Percy is ready, as his mother sees fit he will be at his sons side supporting him as he very much wants.

I swear the context here is so good I'm gonna be thinking about it for days.

Now I'm gonna cry watching Sally/Poseidon edits on the clock up because I physically can't :')

[aviangrian]

ahhh i just wanted to say i love starboy SOOO much!!!! i did not/still dont know anything about f1 but the way you write it is so easy to follow along with and read!!! i love how you write the characters, especially scar/grian/joel/lizzie, you write them so so sooo flawlessly... i love how it seems like were there with scar in the moment of everything going on and how you describe everything from his perspective. i also LOVE how you write scar and grian especially because they both seem just so *real* and *raw* and i usually never see that from fics. the way you write is just so in detail that it really allows the reader to imagine everything thats happening and i LOVEEE that!!! i also love how you write grian and mumbos friendship, like they obviously care about each other so muchhh and i love how the readers able to see that even through scars perspective!!!!! esp the scene after grian fell asleep watching topgun and mumbo helping him lay down into a more comfortable position,,, and how they hugged when grian finally got p1 😭😭❤️ NOT TO MENTION THE LATEST CHAPTERRRR AND SCAR AND GRIANS FIRST KISS????? THAT WHOLE CHAPTER WAS GOLDDDD i loved that chapter so much,,, so much happened between grian and scar???? that scene of them in the club??? scar (and us) finally getting some insight to what happened in grians past from grian himself??? grian being comfortable enough with scar to actually open up to him??? AND THEM CONFESSINGGG??? ☹️☹️☹️❤️❤️❤️ might be my fav chapter if im being honest

i also just wanted to ask a few questions while i was here though;

first, do you have a set upload schedule? or is it like a whenever you have time to work on it thing?

second, do you think youll be posting more content abt this au after starboy is finished? like a grians pov or something? ive become so interested in this au because i can tell so much work has been put into it and id love to see more it!!

lastly, is this going to be an eventual mumscarian fic??? i think its obvious Somethings going on/has happened between grian and mumbo but i just dont know What... like that one scene with them all at the dinner??? or the car scene with grian standing up through the sunroof???

i cant wait to read more chapters!!! but im also scared As Hell because SO much has happened already and its only been 6 chapters. we still have 5 more longgg chapters left and im so scared but also excited for how things are going to go... i hope youre having a good day, i cant wait to see what you have in store for this story!!! 🫶🫶 sawrry that this was a lot of rambling though,,, 😭😭❤️

anon i’m crying?? 😭 thank you so much.

the goal of the fic is real and raw! it’s an unusual setting (maybe not for me considering this is my second racing centric fic) but everything that happens is a product of the environment! the wins from his own team left scar feeling bitter at times, but watching grian win had him so proud he knew he’d get in trouble w his own team if he showed it lol. it’s all about where they are and it makes me sooo happy (like you would not believe) when people who aren’t f1/sports fan still enjoy the fic!

last ch was a lot and contained a lot of really vital stuff that i couldn’t wait to see the reactions of. grian finally opening up is so important to me and scar letting it happen in its own time is a huge part of why grian begins letting him in, which is evidently not something he’s used to at all. mans has been through it in this universe

as for the questions: i don’t have an upload schedule but i try to churn out the chs when i have time. it fits that valentine’s was right before midterms season for me so i got to get something out before i get swamped by all that 🥲 i don’t like to let a full month go by without posting but we’ll see how my semester keeps going lol

and i’ve been thinking of content once i’ve finished starboy. i’ve had ideas of grian’s pov hitting all the major plot points or even a jimmy spin-off one shot but nothing is planned for now. definitely floating around in my mind

mumscarian is not the endgame but the mystery behind grian and mumbo will be revealed! grian is mysterious and mumbo being mumbo goes along w it, but it does come full circle eventually!

i didn’t even realize there’s already only 5 chs left! that’s crazy, considering how much of the story i have left!

thank you again anon, this is all very much appreciated. i love your rambling because it allowed me to ramble too haha

[tunzalines]

fic ideas i have but will prob never write (or finish)

half of these don't really have names so ill just call them whatever the doc is named OOOOOO OYASUMI omori fic, hikikomori route where sunny can't sleep through the night thus progressing to the next day. based on my own gameplay where in my first run was the hikikomori route (which i did not know at the time) so the first ending i got was this endless night (didn't know i could die in black space at the time). wanted to write about sunny slowly completing everything you could do in headspace till, well, idk lost the vision. wanted to kinda write about how dragging it feels to wake up fall back asleep then wake up again only for a minute to past. wanted it to feel ig defeating, if i was to continue it today maybe id slow burn it into the hiki ending? make it a very depressing crawl to the end

i drink till im drunk, smoke till im high p5 (vanilla royal wasn't a thing at the time) AU fic where the metaverse isn't a thing instead they use scopolamine. inspired by the scopolamine documentary by vice. exactly as i said a retelling of the main story with no powers, never actually started writing it since i wanted to nail out the specifics first like how the PT would get the drug n etc. looking at my notes like under half of them just die via OD damn. i remember id wanted to make it a one shot n focus on the PTs mental state/thought process and how they would devolve into doing this. a change i wrote them targeting Sugimura instead of Okumura cuz haru doesn't want to do that to her dad. Sae same deal, also didn't brainstorm a reason why Makoto joins (or maybe she wouldnt't? hm? hm?) tho i have notes on the blackmail thing still happening. idk how id play it out, whether i have her join or be a confidant. no full notes on Shido tho with Akechi thinking the drugging is inhumane and excessive tho also looking into Shido. don't know if i wanted to have Akechi be a normal detective or something? i could keep in his anger for Shido and have that be the reason he'd help the PTs i dunno. heres a direct note that i have: "Honestly not really a team but just all angry together. Akira druggy backstory is revealed" so akira would somehow supply the scopolamine, like i said never fully ironed that out.

and in that moment you knew you waited to long splatoon fic where a human gets reincarnated into a inkling! made this during splat 2 so id be based in inkopolis and no lore from rise of mammalians. wanted it to be very introspective with the protag living through the time before the end of humanity. so while they wouldn't have experienced it the fear and trauma of being so close to the end like that would carry onto her inkling life. while i didn't note it down i think i wanted the protag not to fully know how humanity ended, yeah obviously there was a rise in sea levels but the details? unknown. the protag would see the world of splatoon and look at it with a objective view while living through it (maybe even lost in life burden with the knowledge of a sunken humanity), though i thought of tartar being apart of the story (which the protag would argue humanity n etc with). don't know if id make it post octo expansion or pre and if i write about tartar id probably write in the squidbeak splatoon. so protag would hear about tartar somehow and go looking n which agent 4 notices and starts following them etc etc, leads to tar and reveals protag is reincarnated! idk. i want protag and tar to talk tho, with separate ideals too like tar: fuck this world. protag: this isnt our world anymore (longing yearning angst, youll never see your love ones or anything close to them ever again). squidbeak could be the fun optimists or something. just a fic about splatoon from the world it was before.

I JUST WANTED YOU TO WATCH ME DISSOLVEEEE SLOWLYYY genshin impact fic wooo, easy synopsis from notes: "aether drinks. cuz paimon is dead" this fic is actually half written! i just lost motive and never continued (tho maybe i will? not anytime soon tho :/). a short story on well aether drinking, running into venti, and the clear sense that something is wrong; nothing outright yet from the get go but aether is clearly unhappy. writing focused on aethers very clear mental distraught and regret (which would be more revealed further into the story). i honestly forgot how i wanted the reveal to go (didn't write it down good going me) but basically aether is tricked by lumine to kill paimon because she holds their sealed power. hm maybe less tricked more forced and pressured into killing piamon, nonetheless aether feels awful and would subsequently drink to forget and confess to venti about what hes done.

press 'E' to open inventory sword art online fic, every so often i think about sao ok. this would be a season 1 fic centered around kirito and his time in the moonlit black cats and how it effects him thru the Aincrad arc, represented by a black coat. based on the different jacket he used with the black cats had the idea that it was given to kirito by them as a kinda welcoming uniform thing. anyways they die and he keeps the jacket in his inventory as a memento. heres the rough notes of the plot: Kirito almost throws the jacket away after in fear and survivor guilt (he doesn't) Kirito then keeps it in his inv 24/7 Asuna could question it maybe ? idk He pulls it out in moments for comfort (but only after a long time he gotta get over the deaths first) One day he wears it (end woo)

ok thats all the drafts i have (when will i learn to finish my stories :[ )

[tartppola]

Fine day, if I may leave a message (that I wish shall lift the sides of your lips for today), I would like to say,

YOUR SILVER AND YUULIS COMICS ARE SO!!!! DCRUMPTIOUS I AM SO EMOTIONALLY INVESTED IN IT ESPECIALLY THEM AS KIDS ITS SO ❤️😭 that i wanna go cROOWWOmpCHustomMMRP (I tries making it slubd like the sound im making rn and im not sure if its fallin thru) BUT YEAH I LOVE IT

Especially like,,, lilia and your yuu??? I wanna see more from them honestly the dynamic is so funny like its just the rhing youll take out to get a good laugh on before going on to the rest of your day + your yuu is just so interesting in general that i wanna know more of them and their syory in general and plus,, your art????

Your art is so cute, irs simple, sure but i can see it, the absolute hardwork in it and how it feels so special that when i see it, i know its yours and not anyone else??? Bc its kind of ingrained in a way plus it looks so,, warm? And nice i cant explain it eloquently enough rn mb mb 😭 but i hope the sincerity and genuinity comes through plus how dare you make me so invested in ace + deuce+ yuu so much more like?????? I can't believe youve done this to me and now w how much im invested bc each time i see your artwork of those three (+ grim) its now lowkey ngl my oasis in a scorching desert because i barely see content for them and stuff so now when i see your work i just go !!!!OHHHH!!! Whooooahh!!! Or just :) its them! (Cue me kicking my feet later about it when i think about it)

Oh and if i remember righr??? YOUR KALIM COMIC!! i think its the first one i saw from you the hiwagang ganda(?) Or somrthing where kalim just goes ... wow... while seeing yuu in a crowd and stuff its so cute and everything began falling for me there bc then you began hunting my recommendations feed and im so glad you did thank you, blessed, tskr, and I hope you have a nice day and everytime you finish a drawing you will always smile and feel content

And also i think i recall a post from you making a copypasta(?) Of lyrics and that was so weirdly funny in a way that for the next weeks of it, whenever i think of it i just smile like,,,?? AHHAHA but anyways sleep well and tqke care od youtself and everything and sorry if i gave you a syroke w this 😭 (like the misspells and stuff)

AHSGSHHFKF omg!! sorry this took so ling to respond i get like super overwhelmed when i see big blocks of text but aaaaa tysm!!!!

i’m so honored that you feel that way about my art hhhabdkf ngl i haven’t been able to do more than doodles as of late cus of college + zines but im so glad you still like my silly littol doodles uhuhuhu

i’m also glad that you’ve taken a liking to my guy yuulis uhuhehdhf theyre just my silly little guy! NOT GONNA LIE.....they don’t have that much lore HAHDHAHHDD ( only like super close oomfs know their lore 👁👁 ) but I do have a separate canon divergent version of ch.7 where I hamfist Yuulis lore into it HAGDHAHAHA but I want to see how ch.7 goes first before finalizing it.

and also aaa i’m so glad you like the Young Silver + Lilia comics! they’ve been such a comfort to draw and think about lately hhgrhg

AND IM ESPECIALLY GLAD IVE INFECTED U WITH THE ADEUYUU BRAINWORMS EHHEHEAAAARGHH Ace and Deuce compared to other characters are already so,, so hard to find individually,,,ITS ALSO EVEN HARDR TO FIND STUFF OF THEM AS A COLLECTIVE UUUHUHUHU,,, i’ll definitely draw them more!

[fauslayer]

Stinky and pizzano headcanons go crazy

OH BOY! im about to post images so uh rest under the cut

(x) (x)

the dev art of/about these two is really fucking good i must say.

i have a strange web of headcanons about their meeting and how they interact and about 80% of the gist is that stinky was doomed the second that they said "yeah hes the noisette function" and through a series of interconnected "wouldnt it be funny"s i see them as a kind of quirky mostly-noncommital(*) relationship with an incredibly rocky start. (*youll see)

stinky, Or Phil, since this was the before times, was originally hired for short term contract work on occasional odd jobs for PTV; he wasnt that aware or particularly fond of the network so he became a sort of Pizzano Favourite on virture of talking to him like a normal fucking person. the stuff pizzano asks for is weird and usually incredibly dangerous, but its a chance for him to actually strut his engineering legs and not just fix broken down cars all day. it was during this era that the nickname landed because im 100% convinced that pizzano fucked up his last name day one and called him stinky and never stopped. he hates it.

as jobs turn more frequent, he starts making visits to the studio itself, to do handyman work and maintenance on his pre-existing creations and some other gaggles of props and vehicles (and lots and lots of firearms??) lying around PTV. they strike up a familiar enough racket that pizzano suddenly invites him to join his actual staff, huge benefits and huge salary on top of still getting commission pay (the legality of his pay arrangement is dubious but literally nobody higher-up says no to the pizzano because hes an entertainment juggernaut, and also A Big Man With A Gun). he probably should have said no to this job, but the zeroes beckon him.

new position places him a lot closer to pizzano on the daily, which definitely starts to grate on him. hes loud, obnoxious, changes on a dime, gets stuck in moods from mere minutes to whole weeks, seems allergic to actually getting any proper work done, and is generally kind of a nuisance. the pay is nice, but he cannot deny some days he wants to like. grab that blue motherfucker and chunk him across a room until he stops bouncing. he didnt sign up to be a glorified secretary for some pastry baron lunatic.

the problem is because hes around pizzano a lot more than other workers, and pizzano has more inherent trust in him, stinky gets to see. some weird shit? some concerning shit. like nobody else is freaked out by how often this guy throws up? he just smashes himself into walls for fun? he doesnt even have windows in his room, for gods sake, is nobody else worried about this? but its also none of his business to tell, so he doesnt. the pizzano drags him to restaurants and moving showings and private parties and occasionally, embarrassingly onto the dance floor at a wrap party while intoxicated (lets hope i ever finish that wip). maybe pizzano just isnt great at having friends, stinky wonders, maybe he just exclusively has frenemies or something.

on pizzanos end, this is where the * and the noisette bit kick in a little harder. my biggest "wouldnt it be funny" was just like. what if instead of having the noisette proxy swooning over a relatively unaffected but still loving noise proxy just like a carbon copy of pizza tower it was. The Other Way Around. pizzanos really fucking bad at flirting; he just sorta treats stinky ""the same as he would anyone else"" (hes definitely treating him a little better but he has that irritating pizzano charm) and expects him to pick up on it. hes not mad if stinky DOESNT pick up on it, but pizzano is sure he will eventually! stinky does something nice for him after a bad day and he has to go back to his room and bury his head in his pillow and kick his legs behind him like a schoolgirl.

if anything happens to actually kick off a relationship between the two its probably happening while theyre both drunk at a party or something and pizzano is babbling about how much he enjoys stinkys company and stinky is like .oO{ a bear is fine } and they make some mutual bad decisions that they have to wake up and reflect on but both of them are honestly pretty okay with it. pizzano definitely loves stinky more than stinky loves him At First, but they steadily keep growing into something more comfortable as time goes on. i think sugary spire probably happens a bit before this event, rationally.

thanks for reading my manifesto

[moonswolfie]

Failing grade

Atsumu x fem!reader

Forgive me Lord, for I have sinned.🤩

I seriously don't know how to write suggestive stuff since I've never done it before so I apologise if it's cringe 〒▽〒

also i kinda forgot who has the lower bunk so let's pretend osamu does because that makes it better, youll see what I mean soon ( ╯□╰ )

Warnings: making out, a couple of swear words and that's it

"Mmmm..." Atsumu made a small hum of satisfaction as his lips connected to yours. This isn't exactly what you expected when he invited you over for an emergency study session.

Normally you would scold him for doing something else instead of studying, but admittedly, that was a bit hard to do when his mouth was on yours.

The opened notebooks were scattered across the table in his and Osamu's room, filled with half-finished notes. He pulled you closer, your chest pressing against his.

You felt his tongue brush against your lower lip. You jumped a little when you felt it and he laughed into the kiss. "Ya got cold feet or what?" he mumbled teasingly.

"Atsumu, we should be stu-mmm!" He cut you off by roughly pressing his lips against yours. This asshole. He was totally trying to get out of studying math by "seducing you" or whatever he calls it. Oh well, he'll be the one getting dissapointed when you still demand he studies after he's done.

And you're getting a make out session out of it too, so there's basically no cons for you. Every once in a while, you don't mind your boyfriend being a stubborn idiot.

You wrapped your arms around his neck and he smiled into the kiss, thinking you've finally given up. He pulled you flush against him by your waist and held you tightly.

One of his arms slowly slid up to hold you by the neck and angle your head better.

Just as he tried to pry his tongue into your mouth again, you heard the door creak open.

"Tsumu, what the actual hell do you think you're doing on my bed?" the kiss broke instantly, with the two of you staring at Osamu with wide eyes.

"Why the hell are you home?!" he yelled, face competely flushed from embarrasment. Admittedly, you weren't doing much better than him. You were mortified right now.

"No, why the hell are you makin' out with yer girlfriend on my bed?!" he yelled back, clearly not (fully) amused by the scene that was unfolding in front of him seconds ago.

"Shut up! Yer just jealous cuz you don't have one an' I do!" Atsumu clearly didn't have an excuse.

"I will beat your ass if you don't get off my bed right this second!" Osamu demanded, and you instantly got off the bed. While you did find their fights amusing, they did get really scary sometimes.

Osamu noticed you looked a bit scared and he took a deep breath, saying "This ain't your fault. All Tsumu's, and I know it. So don't worry, I won't get mad at ya."

He said it in a calm, reassuring tone of voice.

You felt like you could finally breathe properly again. Osamu's face travelled across the room and suddenly flashed with mischief when he noticed the notebooks on the table. "Tsumu, if ya fail this test, I'll tell the whole school it was cuz you were makin' out on my bed."

"...You wouldn't."

"Ya think so?" Osamu raised a brow, smirking. Atsumu furrowed his brows, saying nothing in response. Osamu's smirk only widened with the lack of a response.

"So, ya know, I suggest actually studying for once." he said, turning around and slamming the door behind him. As soon as he was gone, Atsumu covered his face with his hands and screamed into them.

"Damn you, Samu!" he yelled with clenched fists, sliding off the bed and settling back at the table, flipping a page of the workbook with a pout.

Well, you guess that works too. Maybe he actually won't get a failing grade this time.

I just realised this is like a separate spicier version of the "you get caught by their siblings" fic I did recently, I swear this wasn't intentional lol

Also I might or might not delete this later because I'm lowkey embarrased to post this🥴

[makahimetenshi]

Follow me inside the wastelands - Chapter 9  -Arthur Maxson x Female Sole Survivor Fanfic

This one will be a long fic with a lot of chapters, I already write the concepts. Since I don’t play as Nora in Fallout 4 because Nate for me is the real protagonist the personalities and ideas are pretty fanbased from another fanfics I read

If you are very very very delighted with one fic and want a continuation I didn’t write or post you can donate me at least $5 bucks, most of this fics have next chapters I don’t finish because lack of motivation but hey a $5 is a $5, I see a few reviews and coments that fics that are abandoned months laters receive coments of wanting to know what happends next. Here it is, I finished my handling with you all, enjoy the fic

 -Im sorry, what did i broke this time? –she said in a low voice before he went to hug her and leave kisses in all the side of her face.

-You saved 9 soldiers and the brotherhood could not be more proud from a having a sentinel as skilled and capable as you, but I also fear for you a lot, I am always worried when you go out but when I see you this time in the gurney I whished that the one knocked out was me instead- her hand went to caress the back of his head and Arthur sighted relieved at the touch, its been more than a month since the last time she touched him there and it was so calming and warm…-what do you need? Where does it hurts? What can I bring you?

-Im surrounded by people…-she said and he leave a big smooch in her cheek, surprising the woman.

-I don’t care, I been worried sick for more than a month so I decided that I don’t care anymore, -he made that realization with an actually surprise for himself like it was liberating to say it- I cant care, I need to be with you right now –Nora breathed out and rest her cheek over his shoulder.

-Mmm lets see…I want a nail clipper, a notebook and a pen, a mirror, a cozy blanket…and…-she bited her lip before saying this actually nervous to overstep- would you sleep with me? Here, at the room, im sorry, I feel pretty tired right now…

-A nail clipper? –his eyes went down to see at her nails and sighted, terrible attention to details- don’t worry, I don’t plan to leave your side, ill bring a pillow, a blanket and my most comfy slippers –Arthur went to took and kiss the inside of her palm, looking at her eyes.

Even disheveled, greasy and tired looking at her chocolate eyes makes all his worries goes away.

-Thank you

-Ill tell the nurses to come and do the check ups while ill go to pick up some stuff okay? I don’t want to comb your hair and touch your scar so they will do that yes? –Nora nodded and yawned- wait for me awake, I see you sleep enough for a entire life.

Oh  boy Arthur was a man in love. Walking in slippers and underwear in the Prydwen just for a woman. The most amazing one.

At coming back to the nursery they were checking her breathing. He wasn’t being stupid or brute, he had the things��in a little bag to not drag unwanted attentions…and while they were working he will step a side and wait, any exam will help to her recovery in the future so no interruptions. Arthur felt the look of Knight Cade over his shoulders, and when he looked at him the man turned the eyes to the rooft, not wanting to cross gazes.

Yeah, he noticed the old man judging him.

-My jaw hurts…the entire mouth –at hearing this Arthur put attention after all it was the cosmetic surgery he paid.

-Sentinel you lost a lot of teeths in the combat, here at the Prydwen we tried to recover and recreate them but since you were in coma,  you could not carry out the treatments that you have to carry out, in addition to the fact that you was not eating solids yet

-When I will start eating solids?

-After we are done with the cocktail of medication –Nora nooded and they started checking her ears –are you cold sentinel?

-Indeed

-I see some mucus, guess youll need more blankets at night, don’t worry –how the hell everybody was around her since almost 2 months and no one realized there was few shelter? Arthurs blood boiled a bit at hearing that.

-When can drink things like tea? I want a hot drink

-Not until you start leg training, you have been prostrate for almost two months, your legs are sored for being inactive so long, right now the amount of liquids and  hydration are controlled by us so you don’t have to pee that much, but if you wish to go just call one of us by pressing that button over there

-I wish for some privacy…

-Don’t worry, we are experts at it and you also have very bad scars at your legs, the plasters have been removed two weeks ago since you were still sleeping and the openings needed to close at open air despise of being cleaned, but the training to move properly again is going to be guided with professionals so you don’t move wrong and break by accident the surgery procedure done when you arrived –Nora nodded, a bit depressed but visible to everyone- don’t worry Sentinel, youll be back to walk and run normally after the training, if you try now your knees and ankles will fail to stand up because your body is unused, once the therapy starts little by little its going to be better, youll be dancing in no time.

Arthur was observing the nurses work and say all important information we wanted to be up to date, but half hour later Nora was looking kinda tired, so he went inside the room and sit in a chair next to her gurney, not bothering or interfering the nurses job, he just wanted to make her know he was around and better not fall asleep just because he wasn’t close. It was selfish but he wanted to expend time together, shes been so close but so far for so long he was craving to be around her.

Two hours passed until they were ready to let the sentinel finally rest, the chekings were done, cleaning, cures, medicine, changes…the nurses were clearly uncomfortable with the elders presence but they weren’t not only authorized to say anything but at no position to ask…They left and the two of them were alone, a few seconds later the elder breathed out and his forehead fall into her shoulder, Noras hands placed in the back of his head caressing a bit to reassure him. Ah its been so long since she was able to do that…

-Everything is alright –he whisper and went to hug her by the waist, wanting to be as close as possible now he was able after so long.

-I cannot go to the bathroom by my own

-Its temporal, what were you thinking? –he knew it was a bad idea start a fight over this subject barely waking up but it was beyond his imagination why she would do something so risky.

-You fight a Deathclaw too

-But I didn’t pull his tail to fall all over me

-Sorry, I went desesperate at the moment –he waved a hand and let it pass, he wouldn’t discuss it right now.

-It was reckless and dangerous but we are all in debt with you for bringing everybody alive, despite how you achieve it –he went back and look at his bag, finding the nail clipper and grabbing her hand –let me take care of you okay? You went enough for a decade –she nodded and settled on the pillow behind her back, raising a hand for him to work over, she smiled relaxed with her heart melting on her chest

-Hey do you have that mirror?

-Yes –his other hand went to search in the bag and give it to her, Nora used her free hand to raise it and take a look

-Damn they cut my hair –she said a bit disgusted looking at the image.

-Beautiful as always –he whisper still cutting her nails.

-I don’t like it, its now how I imagine my head half shaved before

-Women Scribes shaves their heads at the Brotherhood and also look beautiful

-Ill cut different this bangs

-Try to be carefull with the stiches in your wound -she nodded and smiled at him, she had a caring and soft smile.

-You must be tired too, its pretty late

-I spend many nights unable to sleep thinking in your state, now I have you here I want to do as most as possible –he finished a hand and took the other, caressing it slowly with a finger –Nora most of the times you…slip away from me…-he smiled sad and she went forward to kiss his forehead.

-Theres no place for me at your side

-I can create it –she raised an eyebrow confused- I can do it, im the elder –since from a long time he was expeculating with telling her the possibility about…marriage…but it was obviously so soon and a nerviosism take all over him each time he thought about it so he had a better alternative-I read your notebook

-Shit, Preston…-Nora whispered by low closing her eyes and taking air out her chest.

-He was following orders…

-I didn’t think he would do it

-A trustable soldier, im glad he has your back –Nora look at the other side and Arthur thought that was strange while starting to clip her nails on the second hand –Whats wrong?

-Nothing, I didn’t  want you to read it so soon.

-Its an amazing text, sometimes  I have to do similar  tasks  and it really inspired me to do it better.

-I told you I was a lettered before bombs dropped

-Anyway I can…protect you from that side…you have the talent and I have the power –he didn’t have the guts to look at her eyes but at least he was presenting this opportunity, is she wanted to take it or not was completely on her. He would prefer she would…

-We help people because is the right thing to do for everyones happiness, not for the possibility of a more comfortable life for us at all, there’s no such a thing on the wastelands –again, Arthur cant argue against it but she was being despicable of the only life he had the opportunity to ever knew- there’s no other option for me or anyone

-You have to admit that my bed is the most comfortable and safe in all the Commonwealth

-No one is safe, ask the ex mayor synth of Diamond City –Arthur didn’t want to get in this type of discussion now, he preferred to keep it In peace, at least that came out his chest. He was vocal and open about his worries and plans with her in his life.

-Keep doing an excellent work Sentinel

-The most positive thing about being feeded this way is that I wont have to savour anything…

Arthur sighted and finished her hands, now her nails were short and round so there’s no chance of cutting or scratching her skin by accident

-Ill bring you scissors tomorrow for your hair

In a pair of hours both were sleeping, Nora in the gurney pretty pretty covered in blankets and Arthur in a chair, with a pillow floating between the back of his chair and the pillows in Noras gurney, he was covered with one of her blankets extended. At first he didn’t want to sleep, he didn’t want to miss a minute with her, but her eyes were closing and it feeled like torture try to talk to her to avoid sleeping…so he eat his guts and wished her to wake up this time. Also he was tired and sleepy too, he handt have much sleep either this week.

Nora grab his hand under the blankets and both closed their eyes to sleep, connected, looking at each other side, the elder was glad that she was so attentive of his fears and…try to trust with all his heart that she will wake up in a few hours.

Morning came, 7am came, his normal waking up hour and he was afraid to open his eyes and find Nora asleep in a coma again, that everything from tonight was just a dream like the ones he had over this weeks, that dreams were like a pleading, a wish for her recovery…

But he swallow his fears in the end and do it, as elder he had to move forward from his fears a lot and this…wouldn’t be the exception, he was the elder, no matter how difficult everything was he had the duty to not let himself down and overpass each situation.

He open the eyes and look at her chocolate ones, gazing at him, at seeing him awake Nora greeted with a smile.

-Good morning –she whispered and his heart stopped, his heart was running a race before in nerviosism and it just stopped, she was there, right there like she wasn’t in almost two months. Now he can be in peace again, she was at his side.

-Im so glad you are here this morning

-Ill rather be in the most comfortable and safe bed in the Commonwealth –his cheeks blushed from the implications but it make him more happy that she remember the conversation they had just a few hours ago, she was sane and sound –but my mouth is really really dry and since an hour I want to pee but I didn’t want to wake you up since you look so tired and like needing the sleep –instantly Arthur went up and pushed the button to call the nurses, went to kiss her forehead and get up. Their hands were still holding together

-Im tired but you are more important, if you need anything just ask.

-I wanted you to sleep without inconveniences, you take care of me tonight and…all this time…

-And I want you to recover as fast as possible, tell the nurses  all you need, im going to change and get breakfast, ill pass here by lunch, I know you cant eat for now but I want to use my break time with you before heading to my other meetings –she smiled pressed his hand a bit- take proper care of your needs okay? Ask for anything, I insist

-Could you give me my notebook then? I have an idea –the man do as he was told and she gave him a naughty smile –have a nice day at work honey

Oh my god it was all that pre-war American wife fantasys all over again, he had missed it so much. Arthur went to leave kisses all over her face laughting with her before leaving the room.

Arthur made at lunch time to see her, his plate and fork on hand, she cant eat but sharing a meal together was an excuse to talk and he needed to hear her voice after so long desesperatly.

-You know those bastards were already designing a statue for the capital wasterland in case you perish? –Arthur said biting on his bramin steak actually annoyed from the conversation

-My ghost will take a ride to that place

-I know that travelling for your sounds kinda impossible but think that all the soldiers in the Prydwen came from another region and stablished here, is possible to travel far distances

-Back in my days you could be driving for three days and still be in the same state. Anyway  you said I could ask anything right?

-Im glad you ask something

-This is my idea –Arthur left the plate to one side and take the notebook in the page Nora marked him, there was a drawing of a coach with a lot of indications at the sides.

-Elaborate, im not a carpenter

-Silly is a massage chair, its actually pretty simple, it’s a coach or a chair with some vibration device in some parts, some have the functionality to get the seat or the back warm on temperature, I get one as a wedding gift but obviously is not in my house in sanctuary hills anymore

-It’s a good idea, it could be therapeutic

-My legs are sore, it may be good for me to sit there for a few minutes before trying to get up –Arthur nodded and smiled, she was something else.

-I can get it done for when you finally get able to do the training therapy, the most difficult part will be saying goodbye to one of my good chairs

-Oh ill just be fine if its actually clean, don’t worry too much –Arthur went fowards and kiss her cheek, she deserved the best, and he was kinda smoochy today. Nora can understand, he waited a lot for her just like when she waited for Nate to return safe and sound.

Arthur worshiped this beautiful non radioactive goddess, she performed the miracle of getting up from a coma by her own and be enough okay to have a nice healing, not getting in the middle of the elder activities too much, not like he would complain  if he had to but it was a relief to have her in a good state, he would be okay if she was okay and now he cant complain at all, from all the horrible endings que imagined when his mind went to dark places that weeks…this was the best turn of events.

Eventually the nurses give the okay for her to start the training therapy so she would be able to recover mobility. It was such a relief being able to use crutches to at least go to the bathroom by her own, not like she wasn’t in a hurry for actually walk and run but after so long of not being able to pee whenever you want this feeled magical.

Arthur send to the nursery a bouquette of flowers when he heard the news of Nora starting the therapy, but the flowers were rejected, his heart ached at hearing the response but the mature side of his brain told him to calm down, there may be a reason and she wasn’t a completely bitch…she was sometimes for not taking him in consideration before this incident…not staying around much…he was resent lately that they didn’t spend much time together before she disappears no matter the reason and now that he had her she was in a coma.

He made his way with his dinner and a fork, like nothing happened, she was drinking things now which was an advance…she wasn’t saying anything about the bouquette so he would address the subject like a mature man who want to talk things and problems, chatting would solve every problem right?

-Where are the flowers I send in the lunch time? I sorry I cannot attend today but I have meetings

-I rejected them –well no shit Sherlock, what a nasty way to say it, sometimes Arthur hated her manners-I don’t like the flowers of the Commonwealth, the smell is horrible to me, im not going to contaminate the room closed air

-Not only food but also smells? Are you sure you don’t have a problem on your senses?

-You don’t know what the smell of lavender is…or jazmins…I would die to see a bouquette of legit roses, not plastic dry ones –the melancholic tune on her voice make the man a bit sad.

Nora often had melancholic thoughts and attitudes, she often missed her old life and home and told everyone that no one can understand that type of sorrow: except the ghouls, one of the reasons she fraternized so much with ghouls was because they share the living experience from before the bombs falls. Some remember few, some other remember more, some others didn’t care about the past, some others the life in the wastelands overpass them and they don’t remember the better times anymore, some others just move on and accepted this terrible fate…

She adapted with no problem to this reality but sometimes the memorys suddenly appear on certain situations turning down the mood for her. Like getting an unsolicited flash of your dead parents ruining your day and getting you all sad. But everybody’s lost someone, the sorrow was common, the reasons only gets more and more bizarre.

Only  so she wouldn’t die, Arthur will ask later Neriah to try to clon…and mutate…some plants into flowers the most similar as possible to roses to give Nora a surprise.

Neriah find…uncommon a solicitude directly from the elder, especially one that didn’t appear to be so urgent or important but…she wasnt in position to ask or even get a context.

The day she was able to eat solids again Arthur went to eat lunch with his most precious possession, no matter how deep in love he was before he always hesitated about the idea of giving up but now…yeah he was knocked up in love like he never felt before and it was time to let it go…for love, to enchant that beautiful goddess into his arms hopefully forever.

Nora cried while eating a fresh melon, a freacking fresh melon, it tasted exactly like one from before the bombs and her teeths wouldn’t get so sensitive about it.

It was fresh, and watery, and sweet and…a watermelon! She never see one that wasn’t the rad ones!

-It is rare to find –said Arthur laughting at her tears

-The day I kissed you was a good that but today is even better –the man blushed at the memory and smiled silly, it make him happy see her happy.

-Gosh you have a difficult palate to satisfy

-Don’t worry you satisfy me in other ways –now he seriously blushed, but laughted too, she often made this games go to this places.

-Well it does get wet and sweet too –now she snorked over her piece of watermelon, seeds flying from the air coming out her nose, laughting hard and loud.

-Sweet? –Nora asked with her rose all red.

-Well I like…am i bad at dirty talking? I have the suspect...-everytime she does it to him he end in his knees drunk in ecstasy and when he does it she ends up laughting in no time, no fair..

-I do get a little horny actually, getting results…-when Arthur approached for a kiss she went back laughting- nononono not in front of the watermelon! After I finish ill thank you properly –her hand went up to place a cube of watermelon in front of his lips, Arthur open soft and she pushed the fruit inside, the man lick her fingers to dry all the liquid going down and she sighted at the view, hothothothotohot- I don’t tell you enough how handsome you are –her voice come out throaty and low, like it was more an internet thought than something she meant to said loud.

No, she didn’t, it was evident in bed how powerfull their attraction was but she wasn’t as vocal as him, and he was very reserved and not a man of many words.

They never said I love you, yet.

-Id love to hear it –he was right there in her web, eyes locked, gazing at each other, lips open seriously waiting for a passionate kiss, his chest moving up and down on expectation.

Nora smiled and leave the watermelon to a side for a minute with all the pain in the word but it was worth it, her sugary and sticky hands took his cheeks, he felt the coldness for a second but his stomach and chest went full warm  almost instantly

-Arthur Maxson –she stated, getting more and more close, the man went forward slowly to kill distances – I would love to have such a handsome and beautiful man at my side for a long long time-his hands took her by the waist, soft, delicate, but still firm, feeling the curve of her waist and back, she gasped and close her eyes, turning the head to the side expecting a deep kiss.

-Then don’t slip from me, don’t go away, stay at my side for a long long time –Arthur sealed their lips in a kiss, one sweet, wet and warm.

They were at their element, together. Exactly were they were meant to be.

  https://www.fanfiction.net/s/14242575/9/Follow-me-inside-the-wastelands

[37q]

been reconciling my perspective of the world with others close to me recently!

did i ever tell you about the geese and the frost and the sun? maybe i never finished that post, but i was telling kai recently about this absolutely enthralling non-display i catch on my morning drives! ill have to set the scene a little bit for you because kai was already there with me, which reminded me to tell the story.

the horizon grows a few inches on the head of this one ridge i drive by, more like a swell of slopes than anything else. on the northwesterly fringes of the slope's incline right across from a cute little brook runs my stretchy commuter corridor through and around and between rural "small business" owner country.

you might catch the dawn if youre lucky. the crest of the slopes lie between the lawns and the southeastern winter sunrise, framing progression of the dawns warmth and light. and as the grade of the hill dips youll see the number of trees jump, isolated like towers of civilization in a sea of lawn. the shadows are recursive, layered.

illuminated or not, though, the frost shimmers. fractals of dew sparkle on every blade of the desolate sea, to the eye a wave of dusty velvet frozen under shade. dawn is here, yes, but for whom?

well, about 25% of the grass on this side of the slope, according to the canada geese. and the geese just came out of the night, too. im sure theyre thirsty, but ice or even water thats too cold can cause cramps, bloating, or other digestive issues in just about anybody. im sure theyre hungry, but grass marinaded in frost can tear at far more bodily tissue than seems reasonable. im sure theyre cold, but eating or drinking colder stuff forces theyre bodies to use what little energy they have left to warm it up inside of them.

fresh dawn grass though? crisp, dewy, thats refreshing. that hits the spot. but im not them, so i cant feel what theyre feeling. ahhhhh. or phew or yeowch maybe. but thats conjecture. what i can feel, though, is how their instincts are interpolated throughout my abstraction of the world around me.

so we have the players, now we need the whole thing. as the sun draws its first breath over the ridge, melt rides on the coattails of the night. dawns are long and short and in winter theyre even longer and shorter, and watching the shade inch closer to the horizon is breathtaking even without a carpet of muted green crystals melting before my very eyes. sunlight blazing, trees staunch, my pupils are working overtime to get the exposure right on the contrast between the night-grass and morning-grass.

the geese are built to notice grass ripe for eating, though. they land and go right to work. toeing the border between frozen and fresh, their black necks and brown bodies uniformly orient parallel to the trajectory of the sun. the morning grass is now almost-white with nourishment and refraction and anecdotal analogies. the trees are casting a silhouette heavier than the night. the dawn is grinding the hill's shade to nothing. and the geese are animating, embodying the transition from stasis to change.

so anyways. i was driving while telling kai the story and she looked at me with such a glow on her face... she was like. "i just love my wife and the way she looks at the world." skrrt hold up. we look at the world differently? am i particularly... something? "yeah." ok

still have no idea how to conceptualize what makes my way of looking at the world unique but! i got a lead from my friend, she sent me this tiktok and im like, 99% sure its about me?

cute right! and it aligns with what kai may have been alluding to?

[notahorseindisguise]

hi just finished writing this essay and i came back up to the top to say THIS GOT SO MUCH LONGER THAN I MEANT IT TO. i just like writing media analysis. you really dont need to read all of it thats ok <3

i was gonna write this in tags but then it got too long cause i am NOT a concise man . anyway i get why you feel that way thats such a valid opinion, but to me it definitely has its charm . it has the "...calling all SAVIORS, TONIGHT" which i really like, i love that chorus. saviors is a response to the world today, and its almost a call to action, id say. god i think this short response is about to turn into a full essay. sorry.

savior is a word most commonly associated in the cultural conscience with the one guy, jesus. to a very large number of people, the word exclusively refers to him . so when they use it in the plural sense, referring to multiple saviors implies that jesus being the savior was not enough to save us. thats also further supported by the line in strange days where they say "jesus gonna quit his job/he promised us forever/but we got less". theyre saying jesus promised hed be our savior, but it wasnt enough to save us forever . thats why hes quitting his job (of being the savior) because he wasnt enough

so "calling all saviors", and the whole of saviors to me, obviously reads as green day saying like ..we need more people actively fighting to save us. we need more saviors. and i enjoy that message. and maybe im reading into it but it kind of feels like green day is implying "cause we cant do this forever", yk? they need someone to take over but theres really no bands like green day around right now

another reason i like this album is it does really well in its position. i dont know if anyone else has noticed this trend, but the penultimate song of most green day albums seems to be a "goodbye song", and then the last song is a finale. its hard to explain what theyre doing, but you can definitely sense it.

for example: homecoming is basically the end of the story of american idiot. the album could end at homecoming and itd still be a spectacular album, but even though homecoming is a goodbye from the album, its not a finale. whatsername however, definitely is. it feels like it wraps up the album.

this post is already so long, so i wont go into specifics, but you can also DEFINITELY and obviously see this in nimrod, definitely in revolution radio, in 21cb, in dookie (to some extent, if you count all by myself), hell i would argue its even present in ¡uno! to some extent. i could talk about this for ages because i think its really cool

but the point is, saviors is really good at being the second to last song. it sums up the idea for the album (need for help during this modern age and its overwhelmingness), its a call to action for that savior to appear, and it also feels like the album could have ended there if they wanted it to.

but it didn't, because green day is smarter than that, because they had something else to say, which is fancy sauce, and fancy sauce honestly to me feels a bit like green day finally admitting to themselves that they arent angry teenagers anymore . what with the "we all die young someday" . they arent actually saying that theyre dieing young, like I've said before, more like theyre saying everybody dies, no matter how old, unfinished. youll never be able to finish everything you ever could have.

and to me that sentiment almost feels like theyre saying, we couldve done more, but we grew older too fast? maybe? im not sure.

sorry prev, this stopped being about you about a paragraph in, so you dont need to read all this, in fact nobody really does, i just wanted to get some thoughts out there cause as my followers know i loooove analyzing media.

final thoughts: saviors the song is a really good song. i love how it fits into the album. it brings the album home while still leaving that room for one more song that fancy sauce fills perfectly. however, for the titular track, its not very shareable. like its not a song that i could just send someone and be like "this encapsulates the whole new album" . and i dont know that there is one for this album, i think. i think you just gotta listen to the whole thing.

ok so saviors (album) i really enjoy as a whole. im a little disappointed in saviors (song) honestly. it works great in its place in the album, i think its a great song as the penultimate moment of the album . but its not that great a standalone ?

like in the context of. if you were gonna recommend a song to someone from an album. usually youd recommend the song that the album borrows its name from. saviors (song) kind of misses the mark there. its not enough for it to be the only song that people know from it, if that makes sense.

and like i just saw someone say in a review of the album, it kind of feels like saviors doesnt have just one song to recommend to a casual listener to get a feel of the album. maybe strange days? or tadikm? those would be my only two suggestions. but like. it shouldve been saviors (song) and i think it had potential. but its missing Something. something small. idk what it is it needs a little more. maybe if they made it like. longer. and added more to it, like a faster section. im not sure ok but it needs more

[halsteadlover]

I Know You Want Me

*Gif not mine credits to the owner*

• Pairing: Jay Halstead x Reader.

• Requested by my bestie @hereforhalstead (I hate you): Hi bestie it’s me again xx. Can you write one where reader and Jay are having an argument because they have this super high tension but neither of them are doing anything about it and she says something like ‘you either fuck me or I’ll find someone who will’. PLEASE I KNOW YOULL DO IT SO WELL. Love you and don’t hate me but I saw this on tiktok and knew I had to ask😭😭🥰

• Warnings: slight mention of alcohol and drinking, smut (+18), cursing, unprotected sex.

• Word count: 6859.

• A/N: Please read this only if you're +18. Honestly this is so bad, I'm really embarrassed to post it and forgive me for how long this turned out 😭 pls let me know what do you think, comment, like and reblog if you want ❤️ love you all and as always thank you for everything. Hope you enjoy this!

“C'mon guys let's dance!” Kim exclaimed aloud after finishing her drink. You and your team were in a club on one of the rare free nights you had. The music was loud, the bass so powerful you could almost feel it vibrating through your body. You loved going to dance in clubs, it made you feel so alive, seeing people having fun, feeling the drops of sweat running down your back as you romped on the dance floor, the sense of lightness and euphoria you felt as you let your body be guided by the music, it was something that brought you so much joy.

“I'm in!” you exclaimed in response before grabbing your glass and drinking it down in one gulp, trying to repress the retching it gave you. Kevin, who was sitting next to you, put a hand on your shoulder to check how you were while everyone else laughed at your facial expressions.

Well all of them except one.

Jay Halstead sat in his place across from yours, a bored look on his face as he looked around him, as if he didn't even want to be there that night. He just sipped his drink from time to time, his other arm resting on the armrest while he didn't even try to have fun.

God, Jay was the most unpleasent man you ever met, he didn't know what having fun meant. You didn't know if this was due to your presence or not since you two didn't have the best of relationships, but you decided to ignore it. You wouldn't let him ruin your evening.

“You okay now?!” Kevin asked aloud and you nodded when that brief feeling of nausea vanished.

Jay looked briefly at you and for a lapse of a second your eyes met and just the way they looked at you made your legs feel like jelly, making you almost faint on the spot.

It was the first sort of contact you had since you arrived in the club, both of you had done nothing but ignore each other all night. You couldn't describe your relationship, it was so weird. You and Jay were partners, neither of you liked it but for some strange reason this partnership worked, for some strange reason when you were together you were a strong, dynamic duo. But that was only reflected in work, outside the district people could describe you as a dog and cat by the way you fought and bickered all the time. Sometimes it was so funny seeing him so worked up and angry, you purposely tried to provoke him. He was no exception, not even he missed the opportunities to throw digs and say jokes he knew would get on your nerves.

As mentioned, your relationship was very weird.

It was weird because although you two hated each other - it would’ve been so much easier if you had ignored each other and one had pretended the other didn’t exist - you couldn’t help all those fights and arguments. It was weird between the two of you because even though you hated each other you couldn't help but be incredibly attracted to him and you hated yourself for it. Why were you so attracted to a person you couldn't stand? Why couldn't you think of anything other than having his hands and his mouth on you whenever you were in front of him or when his eyes were on you?

On the other hand, you were sure he felt the same too. You felt it by the penetrating way in which his eyes undressed you every time he looked at you, you felt it by the way his pupils dilated when you found yourselves a few centimeters away from each other's face during one of your many arguments, you could feel it from the way his breath itched when he realized he only needed to tilt his face a little to kiss you and, god, how many times you wished he did it.

You didn't like this all, you didn't like how your body reacted whenever he was around you, how every cell in your organism was on fire with even his glance.

God, I hate him.

You nodded. “Let's go!” Kim took your hand and pulled you to the dance floor, almost making you fall from you chair when you got up.

It didn't take you long to let yourself go, also thanks to the alcohol you had in your circulation. Your body moved to the rhythm of the song, your hips almost had a life of their own as they let themselves be guided by the music. You and Kim danced together, both of you singing out loud the song they were playing, so much your throat started to burn and you knew the next day you wouldn’t be able to speak for the sore throat that would come.

But a pair of eyes kept looking at you.

You knew very well who those eyes belonged to, just as you knew they hadn't stopped staring at you even for a second.

Jay had tried to look away from you, even looking for someone else who could get his attention but he couldn't. He couldn't take his eyes off you, your body, the way your hips moved to the beat of the music and he couldn't stop thinking about how well you’d move while you bounced on his dick.

Fuck, there was something about you completely bewitched him, you kept him in a hook and he didn't even know how to get rid of this feeling because he knew it was wrong, you were his partner but, above all, he hated you. He really couldn't stand you, you were so annoying, unpleasent, the most stubborn person he had ever met but, shit, the way you made his blood boil in his veins was something he had never experienced with anyone else. And when your eyes met his throat immediately went dry and a feeling of warmth went through his body.

There was something about you that attracted him so fucking so much and he couldn't explain why in that moment he just wanted to drag you off that dance floor and own every single inch of you.

Your eyes had fucked him over and your body tormented him every minute and second of the day and as he kept looking at you and the little grin on your face he couldn't help but project images of you on his bed while he was fucking you mercilessly as you moaned and screamed his name, you begging him to never stop.

No one has ever made you feel this way, so frustrated and wet with just a look. Jay kept making eye contact with you and god how fucking sexy he was as he looked at you like he was about to come over and fuck you on the dance floor. His legs were slightly spread apart as he was sit, one arm then on the armrest as he raised his glass to his lips and took a sip of his drink, never stopping to look at you. Fuck, how much you wanted to be that glass and how bad you wanted to be on your knees between his legs while you sucked his dick as if your life depended on it.

The very thought made you wet like never before.

Everything about him was so hot and sexy, every inch of his body screamed confidence. He looked so powerful sitting there, dominant, as if he owned the entire world.

Jay spreads his legs apart a little more and lifted his hips slightly forward to get more comfortable in his seat, never breaking eye contact, and this simple movement almost knocked your breath out of your lungs.

Fucking hell.

Your attention shifted away from Jay when you felt someone groping your ass and snapping your head, you saw a man looking at you with an animalistic look and a grin on his face.

“Get your hands off me!” you exclaimed before abruptly dodging from his grasp. Kim, who just then started dancing with a guy, didn't notice anything.

“C'mon baby girl come with me” he mumbled and you slapped him in the face when he tried to grab you again, this time by your hips.

In no time at all, someone pushed the stranger away almost making him fall and it didn't take you a second to realize it was Jay. He spoke and his tone of voice was low, directed only for this man, even if you could perfectly distinguish his words.

“Keep fucking touching her, I dare you.”

Your heart almost stopped and you couldn't help but look at Jay. He was so attractive with that cold expression on his face, his clenched jaw and the sharp gaze as he glared at that man.

“I'm sorry man I didn't realize she's with you” the drunkily man mumbled and Jay pushed him away again.

“If I see you next to her again I won't hesitate to cut your arm off am I understood?! Now get the fuck out of here.”

The stranger walked away quickly, terrified, and Jay's eyes were on you again.

“You okay?” he asked you, moving closer to your ear to be heard and the way your body reacted to his proximity didn’t please you at all.

Oh Lord.

“Yes but I can take care of myself pretty well there was no need for you to intervene!”

“You know a simple 'thank you' would've been fine” he said with a grin plastered on his lips and you rolled your eyes. He was as damn attractive as unbearable.

He was about to walk away when you did the last thing you rationally would've never done. Without even thinking about it, you grabbed him by his arm, making him stop in his footsteps.

“Dance with me?”

What the fuck is wrong with me?

You couldn't believe what you had just said, but by then it was too late to withdraw the question. A look of utter bewilderment, almost shock, appeared on Jay's face, and that must have been one of the few times you had ever seen him express emotions.

“What?!”

“You heard me, don't make me repeat it again.”

“I don't think it's a...”

You interrupted him, not even letting him finish the sentence. “It's just a dance Halstead c'mon! We can pretend we don't hate each other for a while.”

He continued to look at you uncertainly.

“C'mon! Have some fun once in a while!”

You reached out your hand and he stared at it for a few seconds before returning his eyes to you again. You tilted your head slightly as you waited for a response from him and before Jay could think about it, he grabbed your hand. He already knew he'd regret it.

“I don't know how to dance” he said with a slight hint of embarrassment in his voice.

“Me neither, just let the music guide you” you answered close to his ear and he found himself trying to ignore the chills this simple action caused him.

You know damn well how to dance, that's why you gave me a fucking boner by just watching you, he wanted to tell you but thought it wasn't a good idea to say it out loud.

You moved even closer to him, tying your arms around his neck. His breath hitched at that contact and unwittingly his eyes found themselves scanning every inch of your face. His arm spontaneously slid around your waist making your bodies even closer until they touched. At that point any rational thought went out of your mind and you ignored the small part of your brain that told you it was a bad idea as you melted under his touch di lui.

God, it was so good to feel his arms around your body as they held you so firmly and gently at the same time. You looked up at him and the way those two beautiful green eyes were peering at you almost took your breath away. All of a sudden you forgot everything you wanted to say and you couldn't believe the effect Jay had on you, how much you hated it.

Y/N focus damn it.

You began to move slowly, causing both of you to sway even though the type of music was in total contrast to your movements. You didn't care. You didn't care that all the people on that dance floor were going wild but you two were slow dancing, the only thing you could focus on was Jay's hands on you.

“Are you nervous Halstead?” you decided to tease him, noticing the way he was stiff as a pole.

You gasped when Jay suddenly turned you around, pressing your back against his firm, toned chest. His arms were around your waist again and you had to use all your strength not to pass out, especially when you felt his growing hard on pressed on your lower back.

Oh good lord please help me.

“I'm not” he whispered close to your ear and although the loud and deafening music you heard him perfectly. His voice sent shivers down your spine and your breathing quickened. You mentally thanked god Jay couldn't see your face or he'd make fun of you endlessly for the way you were blushing at that moment.

“Are you nervous Y/LN?” he murmured, noticing the way your body reacted and although you couldn't look at him you could perfectly imagine the grin he had on his face.

“You wish you had that kind of power over me Halstead, if anything you annoy me” you replied, raising your head slightly to look at him. He chuckled, looking down at you and wetting his lips with his tongue.

Is he trying to seduce me?

Fuck you were the one who wanted to tease him, how did the situation turn around so quickly?

“You don't look very bothered right now,” he replied and god how right he was. You were anything but annoyed at the time. Excited, frustrated, wet but not bothered.

“What makes you think this?” you asked him, 'accidentally' pushing your hips against Jay's, to the beat of the music. His erection pressed against you almost made you moan, God it felt so damn good your core started aching with need. Your eyes kept alternating between his eyes and his slightly parted lips. His pupils were dilated, the green of his irises almost gone.

You blamed it on alcohol, there's no way on earth you would have done it sober.

Yeah keep telling yourself that.

He tried to suppress a groan and the urge to lift your dress and take you there in front of everyone, he wanted to behave but you were making it so difficult.

“Be careful what you do Y/N” he warned you in an intimidating tone but that had done nothing but turn you on even more.

You bit your lip and Jay took a deep breath trying to supress the urge to bite it for you.

“Let's just dance.”

Your started move your hips more, with more accentuated movements against Jay's. He was losing every shred of sanity, his dick twitching as he felt your ass grinding against him.

He couldn't suppress the groan that came out of his mouth, muttering a “Fuck” under his breath as he pressed his fingers so hard against your hips you were sure they'd leave a mark. He went along with your movements, grinding against you.

“Y/N fuck... What are you doing to me” he tried not to moan like a teenager in heat. He felt he was about to lose control. “Stop whatever the fuck you're doing.”

“You don't seem to mind,” you retorted referring to his hard dick pressed against you.

“You have no idea what you're getting yourself into”. His breathing was heavy, you felt his chest rise and fall quickly against your back and you knew how much he was holding on at that moment. “Holy shit...” he murmured as you continued to grind against him.

His hands wandered on your hips, your waist, he was dying to touch you, he wanted to tear off your clothes, feel every inch of your skin. His fingers lightly touched your breasts and you almost moaned at that contact. You couldn't explain it but you felt the overwhelming desire for him to touch you, to feel his hands on you. You knew this was wrong but you didn't care, your mind was too clouded to think rationally.

You almost stopped breathing when you felt his hand move your hair and his lips press on your neck, starting to kiss and suck your skin. You tilted your head to the side to give him better access and let his mouth torture you, your eyes half closed, your lips slightly parted. You lifted your arm behind you and your hand fisted his hair, feeling how soft it was. You felt him groan against your neck and you seriously thought you were about to collaps sooner or later.

The moment his lips broke away from you, you felt a feeling of emptiness pass through you. God you wanted more, you wanted him, you wanted him in every way imaginable and you didn't care about the consequences, you didn't care you hated each other, you wanted Jay and just him.

You turned to him and the expression of pure lust with which he looked at you was one of the most beautiful and sexy things you have ever seen in your life. Your faces were dangerously close, only a few inches apart and it would've been enough for you to raise your head a little to kiss him. Your hands were on his chest, your fingers caressing his through the fabric of his shirt as his kept gripping your hips.

“We have to stop this before things get worse,” he said but he didn't mean a single word. He just wanted you to stop him because he wouldn't be able to do that in any way.

Your nose brushed against his and you shook his head lightly as your arms encircled his neck. “I don't want to stop Jay.”

“Y/N I'm trying with all my might not to give in and do something we might regret later but, fuck, you're making it so hard me.”

“Yeah I can feel it” you smirked and Jay was on the verge of going crazy, completely losing his mind.

“Don't bite your lip, goddamit don't do this...” he mumbled as his thumb caressing your lower lip, his eyes tracing every single inch of it.

“I know you want me Jay, as much as I want you,” you said, your lips brushing his but without kissing him “I want you to fuck me and if you don't do it I'll find someone who will, maybe that guy...-”

“Fuck it,” he interrupted you and before you could even understand what was happening his mouth was on yours as he devoured you in a kiss so deep and passionate you felt the air sucked out of your lungs. One of his hands clenched your hair into a fist, the other one gripping you tightly as his tongue explored every inch of your mouth.

At that moment you both forgot where you were, that everyone could watch as you both seemed to be on the verge of fucking on that dance floor. But damn it you didn't care, you just wanted that moment to never end. That dizzy feeling that kiss made you feel was something you never felt in your life, no one had ever made you lose your mind as much as Jay Halstead.

He kissed you as if his life depended on it, as if he could die at any moment due to the passion that overwhelmed him like a raging river.

His hands went down from your hips to your ass and squeezed it hard, letting a little moan escape into his mouth. “Oh fuck Jay...” The very moment you moaned his name, Jay knew it wouldn't be the last time because the way his name escaped your lips was something he wanted to hear you scream again and again.

“Fuck,” he groaned against your mouth “That's it we're going home.”

He broke away from the kiss and grabbed your hand, dragging you off the dance floor towards the club exit. He didn't even bother letting the others know you were leaving, he was eager, eager to drag you home and fuck you.

A gasp of surprise escaped your lips when, as soon as you got to his truck, he slammed you into the door, pressing his body against yours as he took your breath away again with another deep and searing kiss.

Jay could feel that kiss through his whole body, like a fire had broken out inside him, and he knew he had already become addicted to your lips and it'd be difficult to break away from you. He grabbed your thigh and lifted your leg, circling his hip with it, a moan escaped both your lips as he rubbed his hard erection against you. You were both a mess of sighs, groans, hands roaming every inch of your bodies and gasps.

“Ah... Jay please...”

“Please what? What do you want?” he whispered as his lips traced kisses along your jaw to your earlobe, nibbling it.

“You. I want you” you sighed, your hands in his hair as you continued to press your body against him to seek some relief. Damn it, you've never been so turned on and eager as you were then.

His hand ran up your body, from your hip up to your jaw, looking at you with so much intensity you almost fainted.

“Do you have any idea how bad I want to bend you over my truck and fuck you?”

“Do it” you blurted out and it was embarrassing how quickly you responded. He chuckled and pulled his face close to yours, taking your lower lip between his teeth and biting it, making you whimper.

God this man will be the death of me.

“You're so eager princess aren't you?” he whispered against your ear “I'm gonna fuck you so hard you'll do nothing but think of me, feel me, for the next few days and weeks. Do you hear me?” he bit and sucked the skin of your neck making you squirm under his touch. You nodded, unable to formulate a single coherent thought. “But not here, I hate you but you deserve more than a dirty fuck in a parking lot.”

Jay closed the door of his apartment with a kick as his mouth continued to devour you, burning you alive. Your hands ran along your bodies with messy and chaotic movements as you undress each other, piece by piece. Your clothes were scattered in a trail leading to Jay's bedroom.

“Jump” he whispered against your lips and you did as he told you, jumping into his arms as his fingers pressed hard on your bare thighs. His touch burned and never before you felt so alive.

He kissed you wildly, never breaking away from you. You bit his lip and the sound that came out of his mouth almost made you cum.

“Fuck Y/N you drive me crazy.”

He dropped you on his bed, your body bounced as he bent over you. You both wore nothing but your underwear and Jay took a couple of seconds to observe you, look at you, study you and imprint in his memory every single detail of you, every single inch of your body. “God you are so fucking beautiful.”

You kissed him again, encircling his hips with your legs in an attempt to feel him as close to you as possible. He started grinding his still covered dick against you, making you moan relentlessly in his mouth.

His lips traced wet kisses down your jaw and chest, one elbow supporting him while the other cupped one of your breasts. He groped it relentlessly, releasing it from your bra and another moan escaped you as he wrapped your mouth around your nipple, grabbing it between his teeth, biting and sucking it.

You arched your back and Jay took the opportunity to slide his hands behind your back and undo your bra which ended up in an indefinite point of the pocket.

“Oh god Jay please.”

“Fuck yes keep saying my name like that” he said as he continued to suck first one breast and then the other, giving both of them the same attention. You felt like you were about to explode from too much desire and Jay seemed to enjoy the way you continued to squirm beneath him. “You smell so fucking good.”

He ran a hand down your body cupping you pussy on top of your panties. You nearly felt your soul leave your body, a loud moan leaving your lips when he started drawing circles on your clit.

“I can feel how wet you are, is this all for me? Do I make you this horny baby?” he muttered against your lips as he kissed you but you could hardly even return that kiss because of your moans.

“Fuck yes, all for you baby I want you so bad.”

Jay almost came into his boxers, he had never seen someone looking so fucking beautiful and just the way pleasure plastered all over your face, made him lose his mind.

He slipped his hand under your panties and a moan died in your throat.

Thank God I shaved.

“Good God you're so wet,” he groaned “You're gonna be the death of me Y/N, do you have any idea how hot you look right now huh?”

He easily slipped two fingers inside you and you threw your head back, your legs spontaneously spread even more “Oh fuck yes! Oh god Jay...” you moaned, your fist closed around the blanket while you already felt over the edge. His fingers curled inside you, hitting your G-spot and almost making you come on the spot.

He suddenly stopped fingering you, taking his hand out of your panties and making you let out a cry of disappointment. Your heart definitely stopped beating when you saw him wrap his lips around his fingers. He moaned as he sucked them with meticulous attention while you were no longer able to breath. He didn't take his eyes off yours even for a second and you had your mouth wide open as you watched the hottest and sexiest scene you've ever seen.

“Hmm so good. Fuck I need to taste you right now.”

“Jay what the fuck!” you exclaimed in horror when he literally ripped your panties off you. He silenced you by pressing his mouth against yours and the thought of your ripped panties was instantly forgotten. With a single movement he grabbed you by your hips and changed positions, making you sit on his lap, never breaking the kiss. You immediately started grinding your hips against his erection, making a mess with your wetness and you would’ve lied if you said you were dying to feel it inside you.

Jay lyed his back on the mattress, your bare chest pressed against his as you continued to esplore each other's mouths.

“I want you to ride my face" he said, biting your lower lip and this phrase alone set your whole body on fire.

“Fuck Jay you're killing me” you moaned against his lips, feeling your insides clench in anticipation. Other times you would've even objected, but back then you were so horny if he had asked you to hang from the chandelier upside down you would've done it without any hesitation. A loud moan came out of your mouth when, after you got into the position, his tongue drew a line along your pussy.

“Oh god princess, you taste so fucking good. I wanted to do this for so long” he groaned and the vibration of his voice against you almost sent you to another dimension. His tongue licked you as his lips sucked on your clit vigorously, as if you were the tastiest meal and he hadn't eaten in months.

“Fuck yes, grind your hips like that baby” he said. His eyes never left you and he felt his dick almost explode in his boxers. You were such a mess on top of him as you screamed and moaned his name and, god, that sight alone made all the sexual tension he went through all worth it.

“Oh fuck yes, yes, yes! God right there baby, don't stop” you moaned out loud as you kept grinding your hips on his face. His arm was around your thigh as he pushed you more against his face. God, he might as well have suffocated and he still would’ve been the happiest man on the planet. With his other hand Jay slid his boxers down and almost breathed a sigh of relief as his erection was released. His fingers gripped the base of his dick and he began to pump with his hand, his tip wet with precum. It was almost embarrassing how much turned on he was, he seriously thought he was going to explode at any moment.

“That’s it fuck my face princess, ride it.”

With your hands you leaned against the head of the bed to give you support, your eyes met his when you lowered your gaze.

“Ah goddamn yes... Fuck Jay you're touching yourself, it's so hot,” you moaned when you noticed his hand around his dick as he pleasured himself “You couldn't help yourself don't you? Fuck!” you finished the sentence with a scream when he penetrated you with his tongue and fucked you with it “Shit, shit, shit!” you slammed the wall with one hand when his lips sucked your clit again.

“Touch your tits for me princess” he muttered against you and it felt like he was being pushed over the precipice when one of your hands grabbed your right boob while you fisted his hair with the other. “Fuck the things you're doing to me right now Y/N, you fucking destroy me.”

“You're so fucking good... Oh fuck, please don't stop you're gonna make me come.” You threw your head back, your eyes closed as you kept grinding on his face while his mouth and tongue fucked you, your hand still massaging your breast wishing it was his.

Jay could feel it, the way your thighs were shaking and gripping his head, the way your movements became more and more chaotic and messy, the way your hand kept pulling his hair. He let go of his dick and pressed his fingers against your thigh as he watched you completely lose control. It was one of the most hottest and heavenly visions he ever witnessed and as a devastating orgasm swept through you, he couldn't help but think how the fuck was even possible he went all this time without this, how could he not give in and fuck you before.

“Holy shit”. Your hair fell in front of your eyes while you had your head down, your eyes closed as you tried to catch your breath and regain contact with the reality you had just lost.

Your legs felt like jelly and you were pretty sure you wouldn't be able to move for the next few minutes. But Jay was not of the same opinion as in no time he pulled himself up and grabbed your hair in a fist, forcing you to turn your head to the side and kiss you again passionately, your back pressed against his bare chest. You could feel your taste in his mouth, his lips and chin still wet from your arousal.

“Jay please” you groaned when his hand grabbed your left breast, the right one around your throat instead.

“Please what?”

“I need you inside me.” You sounded so pathetic and needy but you didn't give a damn, you just wanted to feel his dick inside you, stretching you out.

He grabbed his dick and brought it closer to your entrance, teasing you by sliding it along your pussy but without penetrating you.

“Jay I swear to god i'm gonna fucking kill you.”

“You want me buried deep inside you don't you? Look at you, so eager to be fucked like a little slut.”

For some strange reason these words turned you on even more than you ever wanted. “Yes fuck, yes... Jay please fuck me. Don't you wanna use me too?” you said and your words made his dick twitch.

“I'm gonna to fucking ruin you for everyone else,” without warning he penetrated you from behind, making you moan loudly.

“Holy shit...”

“Jesus christ” he groaned in your ear coming out and thrusting back into you, hard. His thrusts, from slow and controlled, did not take long to become stronger, more ferocious. You felt him in every corner of your body as he fucked you with so much force you felt a piece of your soul come out with each thrust. He fucked you as if you were nothing more than a toy at his mercy and god how much you loved it. You loved being his toy, you loved being used.

“Oh fuck! Yes, yes, yes just like that,” you whimpered and from your reaction Jay knew he had hit your G-spot. He continued at the same pace, with deep, strong thrusts.

“Such a good girl, taking me so fuck good. You like that don't you? Fucking you like a slut” he moaned in your ear, making you lose your mind even more. His fingers that were around your throat brushed your lips and without thinking twice you opened your mouth, sucking them. “Fuck Y/N you're making me losing my goddamn mind.” He let go of your throath and grabbed your hair in a fist, forcing you to tilt your head back.

“Jay oh my god” you cried out, your mind totally clouded with the pleasure he was giving you.

“Holy shit... Yeah that's it, scream my name princess, let everyone know who's making you feel like this”. His lips left hickeys and marks on your neck and he would’ve lied if he said seeing you covered with the marks he had left didn't drive him crazy.

“Fuck you're gonna make me come if you keep squeezing me like that princess” he groaned feeling your walls clenching around him.

“It's just... Ah shit... Your dick feels so good oh my god” you blathered not even knowing if what you said made sense or not.

A feeling of emptiness invaded you as Jay pulled out but before you could even ask what was wrong, Jay grabbed your hips and made you lie down on your back, causing a gasp to escape from your lips. He grabbed your ankles and raised your legs all the way up, spreading them wide at the same time. Fuck, you didn't even know you were able to get your legs up that high.

Jay positioned himself between your legs, his green eyes fixed on yours as he penetrated you again with a strong, deep thrust.

Damn it, in that position you could feel him even deeper. The feeling of pleasure-pain was driving you crazy and you didn't joke at all when you thought you saw angels and heaven for a moment.

I’m definitely not seeing heaven after this.

“Jesus fucking christ” he moaned. He threw his head back as his hips rocked into you, roughly, without any kind of mercy. He was so beautiful, his eyes half closed, his heavy breathing, droplets of sweat running down his forehead and chest, his lips parted as he cursed a long string of obscenities. He looked like a god.

“Oh god Jay, yes! You make me feel so fucking good... Fuck!”

He looked at you again and god, he felt his stomach twist in a vise as he watched the expression of pure lust and ecstasy on your face. How was it possible for someone to look so fucking hot even while falling apart?

“Goddamn look at you... Holy shit... Look at that face, a fucking goddess.”

You felt so full, the pleasure flowing into every vein of your body. You were overwhelmed, your eyes tearing up because of the intensity with which Jay was fucking you. He kept hitting that magical spot inside you with such speed and depth you nearly flew out of your skin.

“Shit I'm gonna come... Fuck...” you moaned feeling that familiar lower belly pressure intensify even more.

“Fuck I can feel it princess, you're squeezing me so hard.”

His fingers still pressed hard around your ankles, his movements becoming more messy, more frantic and you knew he was close too.

“You're gonna come with me too? Fill my pussy with your cum? Ah fuck!”

That was what pushed Jay over the edge and made him come so hard like he never did in his fucking life. You both exploded in an orgasm that caused the earth beneath you to drop for a moment and as Jay let go of your legs and layed next to you, you both came to the conclusion you'd never again experience with anyone what you experienced that night.

You no longer felt sensitivity in your legs and you didn’t dare to imagine how sore you’d be the next day. You spent the next few minutes in silence, both of you staring at the ceiling as you tried to catch your breath. God you never felt that way, it was like you could float on the clouds, touch the sky with your fingers.

But the reality of what had just happened hit you in full once you regained control of your mental faculties.

You just had sex with Jay Halstead, the person you hated most in the world, your colleague and partner.

The most fantastic and mind blowing sex I've ever had in my life, your conscience added.

“We just...” you started talking but stopped when you realized you didn't know how to continue.

“Yeah.”

You turned your head towards him, looking at his profile. Feeling watched, he turned his head towards you too, entwining his eyes into yours. He opened his eyes wide in pure shock all of a sudden, as if he had just realized something.

“Shit I came inside of you” he said and almost choked on his own saliva as he said those words.

“I'm on birth control don't worry, I'm not that stupid.”

He breathed a sigh of relief and took his eyes away from yours, bringing them back to the ceiling. He stared for a few seconds before sighing and lifting himself up, sitting on the edge of the bed, his back to you.

God this whole situation was so embarrassing.

“What are we gonna do?” you dared to ask, lifting yourself up on your elbows. He turned his head towards you, observing you carefully.

“I don't know,” he respondend slightly shaking his head “I mean, I'm gonna be honest Y/N, what I felt tonight... Fuck... This was the best sex I've ever had, but at the same time I hate I felt this good because it's you, the last person I ever wanted to sleep with. Or at least that's what I said to convince myself,” he paused for a moment, running a hand through his hair “I've never lost control as I lose it with you and hate it, I hate I feel like this and I hate you for making me feel like this.”

Your stomach twisted in a vise. You tilted your head slightly to the side as you watched him, not caring you were both still naked. “So this won't happen again?” you asked.

Jay didn’t even think the answer, already knowing what he’d respond. He positioned himself on you, grabbing your jaw with his hand while he supported himself with his other arm, looking at you with his green and piercing eyes. “I know this is a huge mistake but we both know damn well this won't be the last time. Now that I know how you feel I’m very aware I won't be able to resist you for not even a second,” he kissed you, taking your breath away once again and you tried not to smile.

I'm so fucked.

“There are so many things I want to do to you a lifetime won't be enough.”

Yeah, he definitely ruined you for everyone else.

Tag list: @hereforhalstead, @sofferderynnp, @soph0864, @hehurst23, @upsteadlovingheart, @stephanie708, @secondaryjob, @morganupstead, @nevaehstreater18, @mrspeacem1nusone, @sophiatellerrhodes, @dedlund82, @kellykidd, @rippl3s, @alexxavicry, @waywardhunter95, @nachodaze

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[new-to-this123]

Monty’s Revenge

As per requested

May I please request a monty x girlfriend reader? where she was raped too and he does everything he can for her and ruins Bryce..  lots of fluff and smut

(I know the request asks for smut, but the direction I took this story, smut didn't fit. When you read it, you'll see why but I hope you'll still like it though) 

 Monty X reader 

warning: swearing, drug use, alcohol, mention and details of rape, fighting 

word count: 2061

NOTES: I haven't posted in a LOOOOONG time. Now that I'm done with school I definitely have more time so I'm hoping to get all my requests caught up!  I hope you guys like this one. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Y/N journal entry

August 27th 2016

Tonight Kat is hosting a party at  her neighbors house. Kats parties are always a good time. Maybe I can get Monty to notice me tonight, who knows, I know people say he's troubled but there's something about him that i just love. 

Anyways i guess i'll let you know how this party goes.  

August 28th 2016

Well lets just say that yesterday didn't go as planned but it was a goodnight! 

I don't remember anything from the party. The only thing I remember is talking with Monty, and Bryce outside of Hannah's house. I was very drunk and so was monty. I woke up in the clubhouse with monty. We both don't know if we slept together, but I think we may have. The signs were all there, I have a few hickeys on my neck, and there's definitely cum in my panties. 

Monty and I hung out all afternoon, then he drove me home. 

Monty kissed me before I left and said he can't wait to see me at school tomorrow! 

I'm so happy! 

Present day (March 2018) 

Y/N was sitting at the lunch table with her boyfriend Monty when Jessica, Clay and Justin show up and sit. 

“Hey Y/N, can I talk to you for a minute?” Jessica asked

“Why?” Y/N asked, since Jessica never really talked to her. 

“It has to do with the trials” Justin  added. 

“Look Y/N has nothing to do with that so leave her out of it” Monty said defensively placing his hand on Y/N’s lap. 

Jessica looks over at Clay and Justin, and takes a deep breath. 

“Y/N there's something i need to show you and it's not easy.” 

“ok ……. So show me” 

“Not here Y/N” Clay adds

“Why not? Anything you have to tell me you can tell Monty!” 

Jessica slides over two pictures.

Y/N looks down at the first one and ,in the corner, she sees Monty passed out on a chair, and in the middle is a naked and passed out Y/N. 

In the second one, Bryce is taking a selfie of him raping Y/N. 

“Where the fuck did you get these?” Monty yelled, grabbing both pictures.

“When were they taken? How did you get these?” Y/N asked with tears filling her eyes.

“There's a box full of them. But i can't tell you when it was.” jessica replied

“We were hoping you would be able to tell us when this happened.” Justin added

“I mean, i.. I don't know, i can't think of a time that i was left alone with Bryce in the clubhouse, Monty has never let that happen.” Y/N replies. 

Jessica, Justin and Clay look over at Monty. 

“Don't fucking look at me! I didn't let this happen!! Im gonna fucking kill him.” Monty said aggressively.

“NO! Let me go talk to Bryce.. ALONE” Y/N said looking at all four of her peers. 

“I want answers and he's the only one who can give them to me.”  

“No way Y/N!” Monty said

“Are you insane?” Clay added

Y/Ns Texts

Y/N: Hey Bryce, wanna grab a coffee at monets after school? 

Bryce: why? Sick and tired of De La Cruz? Never thought you’d last this long anyways. 

Y/N: urg meet me there at 3

“There meeting with him after school, if you don't want me alone you guys can sit at the back of monet's” Y/N said standing up, grabbing the pictures from Monty and leaving. 

“You guys don't come! He’ll know somethings up” Monty said, pointing at Jessica, Justin and Clay.

“Protect her Montgomery” Justin said, looking him right in the eyes. 

Monty walked after Y/N. 

Y/N walked into Monets and saw Monty in the back with Taylor and Kenneth.

“Urg of course he'd bring his lackeys” Y/N thought to herself as she looked at Taylor and Kenneth.

Y/N orders herself a coffee and sits at a table in the middle of Monets, and waits for Bryce. 

At 3;15pm Bryce walked in, went up to the counter, ordered himself a coffee and joined Y/N. 

“Sorry I'm late, got caught up with some of the guys.” Bryce said as he sat down.  

“All cool” Y/N replied

“So what did you wanna talk about huh? Monty being an ass?” Bryce asked with a big smile on his face. 

“No i wanted to ask you when this happened” Y/N said as she slipped him the selfie of Bryce raping her. 

The smile on Bryce's face quickly changed to anger. He leaned forward on  the table and whispered “where the fuk did you get these?” 

“When did it happen Bryce?” 

“When do you think?” Bryce scoffed. 

“ I don't know, that's why i'm asking you?”

“Just know that you wanted it. You were moaning my name the whole time.” 

Y/N swallowed the lump in her throat and asked Bryce again 

“When did it happen?” 

“When did you wake up in the clubhouse with Monty alone?” Bryce replied with a smirk on his face. 

Y/N’s jaw dropped, and suddenly memories of that night flashed through her head.

Hannah’s Party

Y/N is standing outside, holding a beer, sharing a joint with Monty. 

“You know i was telling Bryce on our way here that i hoped you were here tonight.” Monty said as he passed Y/N the joint.  

“I was hoping you'd be here too Monty” Y/N replied, taking a hit off the joint and coughing. 

“Do we have a newbie here” Bryce said as he walked up and wrapped his arm around Y/N.

“ Yes it is” monty replied laughing. 

Y/N walked back into the party and spent all night drinking and smoking with Monty.

Near the end of the night Y/N and Monty were clearly very drunk and high. Y/N was using monty as her support and monty was using Y/N as his. 

Bryce walked up to them “lets go kids! let's get you home” he said as he placed himself between the both Y/N and Monty and wrapped his arms around both of their shoulders.

Bryce walked them to his car, he helped Y/N into the front seat and Monty in the back.

As he was getting ready to drive off bryce said “now now don't fucking puke in my car” 

“No promises” monty drunkenly said from the back, laying down on the back seat, closing his eyes and passing out. 

Bryce placed his hand on Y/N laps. Even in her highly intoxicated state she thought his hand was a little too high up on her thigh and tried to move it. 

“Shhh baby it's ok” Bryce said as he smiled and squeezed her thigh a little harder. 

They got to the clubhouse and Bryce carried Y/N in and laid her on the couch. 

“Monty” was all Y/N could mumble in her intoxicated state. 

“He's in the car babygirl. You're ok. I got you.” Bryce said as he started pulling Y/N shirt off. 

“No” Y/N tried to mumble and squirm away but Bryce overpowered her and stripped her completely naked. 

“I know you want this. Everyone does” Bryce said as he started raping Y/N. 

“The night of Hannah's party. You were supposed to drive us home. Instead you went to the club house and staged the whole thing” Y/N replied, tears building up in her eyes. 

“Naw! Monty walked in on his own and sat in the chair after I got you undressed. And in casual Monty style he was too drunk to notice anything so when i finished i woke him up and told him he fucked you a while ago but i had to leave because it was late and he told me to leave you guys there. He took the credit and look,here you are two years later, still happily together. So why are you bitching, we all got what we wanted in the end” 

Y/N looked at Bryce in disbelief. 

“We all got what we wanted?” Y/N asked a tear falling down her cheek. 

“You got the guy, he got the girl and I got an easy lay” Bryce smiled as he stood up and left. 

“YOU RAPED ME” Y/N yelled as Bryce left Monets and Monty ran to you. 

 “Baby what did he say?” Monty asked wiping away your tears. 

“You walked in when he raped me and you did NOTHING!!!!!!!” Y/N yelled as she pushed monty away running out of Monets. 

“Y/N!! BAAAABE! HOLD UP!” monty yelled running after Y/N. 

“NO! FUCK OFF MONTY!” Y/N screamed tears pouring down her cheeks. 

Monty walked away, angry and heartbroken at what his girlfriend told him. He got to Monets,where his car was parked, and got in and drove towards Bryces house. 

He got to Bryces and went straight for the guest house.

“YOU FUCKING SON OF BITCH” Monty yelled punching Bryce in the face. 

“What the fuck De La Cruz??” Bryce asked, pissed off.

“You raped my girlfriend!” monty replied. 

“She wasn't your girlfriend then and she wanted it! She was moaning my name the whole time” Bryce shot back pushing Monty.

 “NO!!! YOU RAPED Y/N!!!!” Monty yelled again, grabbing Bryce by the collar of his shirt.

“Your bitch wanted it! And if it weren't for that night you two wouldn't be together! So shut the fuck up before i beat you like you dad does” Bryce spat at Monty. 

In that moment Monty’s mind went black with anger and he jumped on Bryce and started punching him over and over again. Kenneth, Taylor, Marcus and Luke all tried to pull Monty off Bryce to no avail. 

“Monty! Stop!” Scott said as he pulled Monty up from the back of his shirt. 

“FUCK OFF” Monty yelled pushing scott, who stood his ground and grabbed monty wrists. 

“CALM THE FUCK DOWN” scott yelled at Monty, as he pulled him out the guest house, to his car. 

“He fucking raped Y/N” Monty told Scott.

“And you fucked him up. Youll be lucky if he doesnt fucking die dude” scott replied. 

“Good, he deserves it!” Monty said, getting into the passenger seat of his jeep. 

“Y/N’s parents are gone for the week, that's where we're going” Scott said as he got into the driver side and drove off. 

“Y/N open up it's me Scott” Scott said knocking and Y/N’s door. 

“Oh my god you are an impatient neighbor!” Y/N said as she opened the door. 

“OH MY GOD MONTY!!!” she yelled as she saw Monty's black eye and bloody nose. 

“You should see Bryce, he looks worse” Monty smiled. 

“Ya pretty sure he almost killed him” Scott replied. 

“You went after your best friend?” Y/N asked, leading Monty to the bathroom. 

“Of course I went after him! He hurt the love of my life, and lied to me about it. He’s lucky I didn't kill him.” Monty smiled. 

Y/N wiped the blood of his face and hands. 

“I love you Montgomery” Y/N said, bandaging his hands.

“I love you too Y/N” Monty replied kissing the top of Y/Ns head. 

“Hey you two im gonna head home i'll see you tomorrow.” Scott said, leaving and heading next door. 

“Let's go cuddle and watch a movie” Monty said wrapping his arm around Y/N’s shoulders 

Y/N and Monty ordered a pizza and cuddled for three movies in her bed. 

“Y/N…” Monty said moving some hair out of Y/N’s eyes. 

“Ya?” Y/N replied butterflies in her stomach. 

“I really love you.” Monty said looking into Y/N’s eyes.

“Monty, i can't have sex, i don't know when ill be able to but I'm not comfortable with it right now. After finding out about Bryce, I don't know, i feel different” Y/N said tears building up in her. 

“ Hey baby girl, it's ok, I'm here for you no matter what and it doesn't matter how long it takes, I'll wait for you to be ready. I love you and I'm not going anywhere.” Monty replied wiping away Y/Ns tears and bringing her into a hug.