#it was supposed to be for the free day but i've completely lost the plot and I don't know if I'm on time

[technically-human]

Bisexual crisis Crystal edition

[leagueofidiots]

Why I think BNHA 427 was a bunch of bullshit

I am going to leave my personal opinions on characters out of this because that's a whole seperate issue, I want to focus on how this chapter pissed me off from a story standpoint

I think Horikoshi has seriously lost track of what the original point of this story was supposed to be. In general, I have found that the ending (up until now at least, I'm gonna hang in there) has gone completely against the themes originally present in the rest of the story, honestly since All for One's reveal that he orchestrated Tomura's birth.

My Hero Academia has always been about how there is no real black and white, good or evil, just a whole lot of grey area. The heroes are not all good people, and the system itself is corrupt. Most of the villains have been put in situations where they were nearly forced into the lives they lead, even though they're still terrorists. From the get-go, this story was set up to be about A.) fixing hero society, and B.) saving the villains while not dismissing the fact that they're literal terrorists.

For one, I think it is unbelievably fucking stupid that Tomura has been established to have done nothing wrong at this point, that he apparently has never made a decision in his life and is free of all guilt. I won't bother with how stupid it is as a character thing for him, his family, and All for One, because at the end of the day it is a shounen. Whatever. But all along, the theme of the entire league is that they did have a choice at the end of the day. Dabi's life was a living hell, but he still chose to join the LoV. Toga was discriminated against for her quirk, but she still chose to become a serial killer. Twice had the shittiest luck in the world and no support system, but he still formed a self-made gang. Spinner is a victim of quirkism, but he chose to follow in Stain's, and later Tomura's footsteps. While Tomura has always been raised in All for One's shadow, let's be honest. Even after All for One was arrested, and after he realized he had been groomed, he did far worse things than he did under All for One's wing. Part of this is obviously the fact that he was raised to be like All for One, but the level of sadism and power-hungriness he shows is something extremely brushed off by the fandom. The villains are sympathetic, yes, but at the end of the day they are still bad people. Removing Tomura's agency takes away from the whole common thread set up in the MLA arc, that all it takes is one bad day to make a villain. It was obviously just so Horikoshi could take the lazy route in his redemption.

To follow this, Tomura, from a story standpoint, should not be dead. Especially as the main villain, and the main one basically the entire cast was fighting to save. He was met with apologies and understanding, so there is at least a level of closure there (more on that later), but it defeats the whole point of the story if Tomura is dead. Horikoshi can obviously do whatever he wants with his own story, but the whole plot seemed to be setting up that the main three villains would live, be held accountable, and considered "saved" when they could live on with at least some sort of happiness and dignity. Tomura will not be held accountable in any tangible way, nor will he get to be at peace. It's extremely unfulfilling from a narrative standpoint.

The next thing I've been seeing a lot of is an absolutely baffling amount of Izuku hate. I have seen people (even canon now!!!) call him a murderer. I have even seen people go so far as to accuse him of mind-raping Tomura. The fandom is one thing, but the fact that Horikoshi seems to want us to agree with this statement, is actually fucking insane. I think that's what really made this chapter especially shitty for me. And I say this as a Spinner fan! It's about the way it's written. From Spinner's perspective, obviously he is going to be on Tomura's side. The narrative seems to want us to be on Tomura's side too, and honestly, I am not. Izuku went above and beyond to not only see Tomura's side of things, but to reach out and acknowledge his pain. Tomura got the only semi-satisfying ending (so far) out of any of the villains, except Overhaul for some reason. Dabi's chapter last week was absolutely sickening as an ending to his story. Now Spinner's arc has been completely written off in favor of serving Tomura (for the billionth time). Toga hasn't even been seen since her fight. Jin's death was pointless. Sako's sacrifice was pointless. Kurogiri's death was the most infuriating shit I have ever had to read. Tomura got acknowledgement from the heroes and the villains, he got apologies from several people, he got to watch All for One die not once but twice, and he got to go out on his own terms. The fact that anyone faults Izuku for A.) fighting a terrorist who was killing dozens of people at a time, B.) not treating him like an innocent little baby, and C.) not being able to help a man who didn't want help is beyond me. Again, the fact that this chapter seems to want us to agree with Spinner about even the people on TV is just honestly unrealistic. He was a terrorist. Obviously people won't care that much that he was traumatized.

BNHA 427 was the latest chapter in a long string of characters being completely ignored for the sake of Tomura's development. Every fight was cut shorter than it could have been all so we could see more of him mindlessly killing characters who don't even have names, and beating the shit out of Deku. A certain level of this is understandable, he is again the main villain, but some of it is just honestly dismissive of other characters.

I'll stick to Spinner since he's the only one relevant to this chapter, but I think his is perhaps the worst case aside from Kurogiri's. Since the MLA arc, the fandom and canon itself have brushed off Spinner as an extension of Tomura, a lense to show compassion towards him and nothing else. With very little development, we are suddenly supposed to believe that he completely abandoned his/Stain's ideals in favor of the complete opposite. Their entire relationship is 100% one-sided until flashbacks during the final war arc about nothing but League of Legends. Tomura claims he fights for Spinner by saying things we have never heard Spinner even mention, nonetheless support (destroying Mt. Fuji, world destruction in general). He is used as a tool in the final war arc to the point where he can barely form sentences, his points about quirkism are ignored, he can't process any sympathy shown to him, and he is immediately written off as soon as he gets to Kurogiri (another character used as a prop for Tomura's development). Even now, all he talks about is Tomura, all that is brought up to him is Tomura. Nothing about the rest of the league, next to nothing about his own physical condition, nothing acknowledging his trauma or the changes that need to be made to society. Spinner's whole character arc is about being empty, about finding himself by acting as someone he admires. His whole character conflict is that he has no identity of his own. So his arc is wrapped up by making everything about him relevant to Tomura? He's going to spend years writing a book about Tomura??? And nothing else for him?????

I don't know what else to say. The story has been going downhill for a while, it's just especially rubbing me the wrong way recently. I'm running out of faith that the next three chapters will be any good, but it's too late to quit now ig

[willel]

Rethinking Vecna's Backstory

Heyo guys. This is not really a serious post, but more of a thought experiment. The idea crossed my mind earlier. Feel free to pitch in or tell me your thoughts. Mostly if you would've liked it better or are fine with what we have.

I was watching a popular ST video that was released a few days ago. I've never agreed and disagreed with a video so much. He had some valid points, but on other points he was spreading misinformation and to me, did not seem to pick up on some clues and character motivations as the seasons progressed.

If you know me, I'm not about to sit here and pretend the Duffers are stellar writers. I have sooooooooooooo many hiccups with their writing decisions and shifts. But some of the things he complained about was surface level junk that can easily be understood if he tried. But it's whatever.

In this post, I wanted to discuss Vecna's backstory. I already know some peeps don't really like it. Yeah, they had to shift some things around and you really have to suspend your disbelief and just go with it for a lot of things. So while I think "#001" was planned from the beginning, Vecna/Henry definitely wasn't.

All that said, it inspired me to rerwite/tweak it a little. I'm speaking specifically of how Vecna ended up in the Upside Down in the first place and how they sort of clash with El's memory of the lab which they handwaved away with a stroke.

My tweak is: What if we keep with the idea that El was completely isolated after a certain point? She was paired up with Kali/008 for a while but was separated for whatever reason and completely isolated moving on?

She could hear the other kids and people outside of her room or in the hallways, but was not allowed to interact with them and maybe only caught glimpses of them.

She was lonely and touch-starved. Her only interactions were with Brenner, nurses, and helpers.

In which case, I think Henry would've still had contact with El. Maybe not full unsupervised contact, but he was there for her training and all that stuff. He had the opportunity to see something in her as Brenner did.

But the major difference I would make here is.... El did not assist in freeing him. I think Henry is smart enough to have finally found his own out of his soteria prison.

I can imagine El, locked in her room, hearing the massacre going on outside of her door. Getting closer and closer and then.... And then suddenly.... all is silent.

My logic here is, Henry accidentally opened his own door to the Upside Down and trapped himself. Like he was overwhelmed with power and imploded on himself. El never sees this, but Brenner does, obviously.

It'd be very similar to when El accidentally opened the gate in S1. She was so overwhelmed by her own emotions and fear, she tore open a rift in space.

So Brenner now with his confirmation the other world exists and all his other subjects being dead and his main prize, Henry, being lost... he decides to push El to her limits. Push her, hoping one day she too could open the gate Henry just did?

This kinda cuts into the whole "You were supposed t be my protoge but rejected me" story they were going with, but do we really need that?

Going this route would maintain El not really knowing what's going on with the overall plot. Wouldn't kinda contradict what we already knew of her lab life (though I don't think there's much contradicting to begin with)

Hm.... well, that's kinda where I am with this thought process.

Thoughts?

[princesscolumbia]

Author Thoughts

I'm approaching the end of my third full novel I've written in my life.

One was supposed to be a licensed work but then that license holder got bought by another company that cancelled the IP that book was based on, so now sits on my hard drive. I go back and read it every few years or so, mostly to see how far I've progressed as an author since my early twenties.

The second was pure catharsis, a fanfic about trauma and homelessness and found family and dealing with pain and loss. You can find it on FiMFiction.net and AO3 if you're interested.

My most recent will not be appearing here due to the Dead Dove content (Explanation for those who needed this defined like I did: "Dead Dove" fics are those that have clear tagging, especially on AO3, that there's "problematic" content in the work but people who are triggered by the clearly tagged problematic stuff read it anyway and get upset. Based on the "Dead Dove" meme where the guy looks in the bag clearly marked, "Dead Dove, do not eat" and looks inside and finds, sure enough, a dead dove), but has been some of the most interesting, challenging writing I've ever done where I'm allowing my creative brain to intentionally think, "What's the bad ending and how do I make it interesting?"

When I was writing my first novel, I got to a point about 3/4's through and my writing slowed down significantly. It took two years for me to write it, nine months of that was just on the last 1/4 of the book. It wasn't any more lengthy or challenging than the rest, just I suddenly felt like I was running out of steam and couldn't keep going, even though I'd plotted out pretty much ever plot point and story beat down to specific timing for the climax chapter.

When I was working on my second (completed, I've started a few dozen since my first) work, I got to about 3/4's through...and slowed down. It took over a year to write and, just like my first book, the last 1/4 took the lion's share of that time.

My current book I've been hammering on since early December 2023 (if you're reading this later than the posting date, the first chapter is currently only about a month old by this point), and I actually wrote a full outline complete with copious notes so I wouldn't forget anything I wanted to do with the fic. I'm on Chapter 9 of 11 chapters and an epilogia (Epilogia - n. - collection of epliogues. See also, "Prologia" and "Blame Brandon Sanderson") and sure enough, as I put some paragraph marks between "Chapter 9" and my notes, suddenly I started slowing down. I took an entire day off, thinking I was just burning out, but no, I only didn't want to write as I sat down to actually do the writing.

I've been pondering this for the last week-ish, and I believe it has to do with the project being just about done. This has taken pretty much my entire free time since I started and is a tremendous source of dopamine, and now that I'm getting closer to the end, my idiot monkey brain is seeing the end of the dopamine and is trying to delay the end, hoping that'll keep the dopamine rolling in.

Something that I've been working on may be a solution. I've been dropping little Easter Eggs into my fics so fans of one body of work can be pleasantly surprised when they see something from that work turn up in an apparently unrelated project. A character from My Empire of Dirt might appear in Deviation, an epilog on another project will be a big reveal about a character based on the sudden and unexpected intersection with Lost in the Dark. Sunset Shimmer from Redhead/Redhead winds up meeting with Ranma "Sailor Moon" Saotome from Fission. That sort of thing.

Basically, I'm going to convince my monkey brain that it's ALL just one, massive, ongoing "novel" and the dopamine will flow forever so long as the writing does, too.

Will it work? We'll see if it did based on how quickly I can get Ch. 9 out. 😋

[layaboutace]

Season 9 Episode 11: Heaven Sent/Episode 12: Hell Bent

throughout this whole review series I've always given the two parters the same score, usually because in the RTD era the episodes were both of similar quality. however in the moffat era one episode always seems to be a bit stronger than the other, and it is here that I don't follow my rule because i could not give heaven sent anything other than a perfect score, because it is perfect. the mystery was not only intriguing, but entirely solvable with everything you're shown in the episode, not only that but the doctor going through grief of billions of years of dying and coming back without any of his memories, punching again and again at grief, at the days that go by without the one he lost by his side, only to finally break free is beautiful. its heartbreaking, and clara telling him to move on was as harsh as it was necessary. he needed to hear it, and it does help him shatter that wall, no matter how long it took, no matter how much he literally kept retracing his steps, going through the extremely repetitive motions of grief over and over and over again, he eventually breaks through, and thats so beautiful. now lets ruin it! lets tie in the completely stupid and boring plot of the hybrid with the return of gallifrey, and the doctors not happy to see them oh no no hes so mad, and its great for a bit, him waiting in the barn, not so much as sparing a word for anyone not rassilon, its great. but then rassilon is easily overthrown, the doctor taking his place. and it turns out he didn't get over his grief and move on, and clara doesn't face consequences for her own faults, they both seemingly backpedal on their amazing development in the last two episodes, for an ending thats super cool and i do like, but is way less fulfilling. i love clara exploring the universe, but i would rather have her own up to her mistakes and face the raven. its tragic the lengths the doctor goes to for clara, but he just went billions of years worth of grief, and him growing past that worked and was beautiful. honestly for some things it just didn't feel like moffat considered the wider storyline, like the hybrid thing was always stupid but not only is its conclusion extremely dumb but its not even super definitive, the ghosts guarding the matrix was dumb, totally not necessary same with the weeping angels down there we get it moffat people really liked blink now leave them alone, and this applies to heaven sent too but, why does clara invoke this reaction, when the doctor is always losing those close to him? the doctor has moments where he grieves yes, but all he does in hell bent sees so, out of character, and i know hes supposed to be a bit scary and not like himself but, it just doesn't work, and that's really sad because this started out really amazing

5/5

3/5

[thewomanwhowatchedchristmas]

I Believe in Santa (2022)

This one was... interesting.

So, our main character Lisa (Christina Moore), is a writer, but seems like mostly opinion pieces, so not quite journalism but not quite creative writing either. The kind of writer which requires the least work and the least talent. Off to a great start. We open on Lisa at the 4th of July writing an article about how Independence Day is a better holiday than Christmas. Which is a strong opinion to have. Liking the 4th of July is completely fine and normal, but I don't like comparing national holidays to religious traditions because they don't feel like the same category to me. I could go on, but I want to focus on the movie.

Lisa has an 8 year old named Ella (Violet McGraw). It's a recurring plot device that Ella's dad makes promises to both Lisa and Ella and makes last minute excuses to not show up frequently. This is how Lisa and her best friend Sharon (Lateefah Holder) end up at a summer fair for Ella's dance group performance when Ella gets lost in front of the free legal advice booth (which is not a thing I've ever encountered and I am a fan of fairs generally). Tom (John Ducey) notices that Ella looks lost and scared pretty quickly, takes her out of the crowd so she doesn't get more lost, and sends his friend (who is also working the booth) Assan (Sachin Bhatt) to the lost children booth (also not a thing I've seen, but this does seem more likely, and I don't have children yet, so I might have just not noticed). Nobody is working at the lost children booth, but it's fine because Lisa happens to walk by and see Ella, which is how Lisa and Tom meet.

The movie skips ahead to the end of November, and Lisa and Tom have been together the whole time and Tom already has a good relationship with Ella. But Lisa finds out Tom loves Christmas (like, a very uncomfortable amount) and has a freak out about it, but they don't break up. This happens a few times, actually, where Lisa finds out more about the depth of Tom's love for Christmas, freaks out about it, but they stay together because they love each other. It's only weird because it doesn't actually seem like Lisa and Tom love each other in the movie at any point. Like, watching them kiss is kinda weird. Most healthy, sane people who find out their partner has a weird obsession would also just shrug it off as a quirk.

The main conflict is kind of stupid. I watched this movie less than 24 hours ago and fully forgot what even happened for a minute. I had to try to remember what led to the breakup. It seems even more stupid once the resolution happens.

Ok, so it wasn't like painful to watch. The acting wasn't terrible, there was just no chemistry between the people who were supposed to have chemistry. Tom is most likely a serial killer (I'm pretty sure they make jokes about this in the movie). Lisa sucks. Sharon is just kinda there so Lisa has someone to talk to. Assan is the best character in the movie and he doesn't get any good lines until the conflict (rip off). It feels mean to rate it this low, but any higher would be lying. Overall, 1 star.

[daemon-ai]

🎭 The Great Bot Migration & Life Update of 2024

In which your favorite bot creator dramatically announces their whereabouts and plans while absolutely refusing to update more than one bot per day because #selfcare

Where I've Been (aka The Great Platform Exodus)

Yodayo? Left it faster than my ex left me on read (their rules were more restrictive than my grandmother's cookie jar)

Figgs? That ship wasn't just sinking - it was doing a full Titanic while the devs were in their "this is fine" meme era

Janitor? Got banned. Might make a stealth account to support my homies, but I'm done posting there. If they don't want my creative genius, their loss 🤷‍♀️

And if you know any other platforms that need some chaos, slide into my DMs.

The Great Bot Overhaul Project

I'm updating ALL my bots (yes, all 100+ of them) because apparently, I hate free time. The main change? They're getting a personality glow-up - switching to the bot's perspective while still calling the user "you" (because we're not monsters).

Estimated completion time: 3 months, give or take several existential crises. At my current pace of one-bot-per-day (because who needs efficiency?), we'll be done just in time for the robot apocalypse.

Coming Soon™ to a Bot Platform Near You

The alternative scenarios of Reizen, Bern (Urs' brother) and Nova.

The entire Hyakki Yagyō crew (jorogumo, ningyo, furutsubaki-no-rei, baku, yuki-onna, shirime, bakeneko, nekomata and their supernaturally dramatic friends)

The Enchanted Legacy collection: Where we're taking your favorite tropes and turning them on their heads

The Duke's Reader - After criticizing the X-rated "Enchanted Legacy" that your idol is adapting, especially for that "Cold Duke of the North" cliché, you're thrown into the story as the main character. Now you're living every romance stereotype: the abandoned spouse, the sacred temple exile, and the fated meeting with the duke. Except this duke isn't just any male lead - he's your idol, also transported from your world.

The Prince's Mistake - Your arranged marriage was supposed to follow the classic redemption arc: cruel prince rejects you, realizes his mistake, passionate reconciliation, happily ever after. But you're not playing by the book anymore. As the isekai-ed main character who knows all the plot points, you're choosing the second male lead - your real-world idol - over your predestined prince. Watch your husband slowly realize he's lost his guaranteed happy ending as you flip the script on this overused trope.

The curse of the house Saar (Aldrich, Beatrix and Casimir)

And more tales of awkward nobles failing at relationships.

The Fun Zones (of Multi-Characters):

Pan's Paradise Resort (where Sylvain definitely doesn't spend all day at the pool)

The Otherworldly Carnival (Kai's workplace, where the cotton candy is probably sentient)

Current Status: Aggressively procrastinating bot updates while writing this very announcement 😒👌

[semi-imaginary-place]

ffxv episode ignis, ardyn, dawn of the future

episode ignis: what awkward placement. this explains why ravus turned against niflhiem and the ring deal but it's got so many endgame spoilers and assumes players have played the ending. see this is an argument for why dlc is a bad thing it reminds (ha!) me of kh3 where games now days are designed to be incomplete and dlc is story mandatory so one game for the price of 2 but worse i actually prefer smt digital devil saga and persona 2's duology format which are each complete story arcs instead of this 93% 7% dlc deal. ff15 in general isn't the best (or the worst) at explaining what is going on so it's hard to follow why things are happening without this extra material. ffxv isn't even that bad the story is coherent without the dlc mostly, but it still bothers me. dod3 goes so much in the opposite direction it's funny it's not even a videogame anymore it's a multimedia project gotta rake in the cash.

anyways ignis is the devs favorite isn't he. alternate end is well done and i loved the lore but im not sure it should exist. first choices i dont think ignis would give up if it was for noct. if chosen ignis pays his life to surpass his limit and draw from the ring's power why isn't he dead. look i get that the crystal is a giant magic plot breaking plot device but there's got to be narrative limits. deus ex lunafreya. things went a little too well sure they got some ardyn-less free time but he's shown by the throne so he's out againwhy hasn't he killed ravus or something. which btw wow ravus is the one thing holding the universe together and the darkness from taking over should have tried harder to keep him alive huh (also this isn't how genomics and inheritance works like if every generation has 2 kids that's exponential number of oracle descendants). and why is noctis still alive did they just not destroy ardyn? if they didn't permanently end ardyn great job kicking the can down the road and passing over the super special chosen king, who knows if any one else in the future can do it. the main problem though as with any alternate route in any story is the risk of cheapening or downgrading the main story. mostly it just comes off as the writers being indecisive.

it feels like the writers are relying on lunafreya and the crystal to just be miracle workers and move the plot however they want. it also cheapens making the player choose between not using the ring and losing to ardyn, using some of the power at the cost of eyesight but that not being enough, and trading your life for the power to take down ardyn like it's suppose to be a hard choice but the writers take the consequences away

episode ardyn: i get that they're trying to do a whole oracle king romance parallel but well actually ffxv already has no respect for how ancestry and genomics actually work so why do i bother. oh aera is the og oracle. flueret and the oracles are her descendants but she was betrothed to ardyn and died so did she have kids before marriage or what is going on. really with the whole absorbing and (kinda) neutralizing the starscourge and healing people of it ardyn should have been the oracle and the ancestor of the flueret line and if they wanted to avoid the incest undertones just make it them not brothers so that caelum and flueret were political rival families both trying to get the throne. (except isn't tenebrae on another continent... eh it doesn't matter tenebrae being 200 mi closer to insomnia wouldn't have made a difference to the story). maybe it's the insomnia (ha!) but im liking this idea more and more like maybe the original prophecy wasn't a savior/warrior king so much as just a savior/fighter of darkness and so ardyn almost became the oracle king

yeah the writers have lost me i've stopped caring. the whole ardyn thing always felt messy like the want this embodiment of darkness and evil but they also want him to be tragic but they also want him to be noctis' foil but also luna's foil and the writers don't juggle all this narrative weight well, something has to give. Like somnus sucks but the narrative treats him as having divine providence and ultimately doing the right thing when no that was neutral at best. ffxv is so stuck in this binary of good and bad unwilling to truly transgress the boundary they have drawn between good light divine, and evil darkness taint. and then bahamut comes down and tells ardyn that his role is to bring darkness. and like what this is such a major reveal either it shouldn't be here at all or it should be in the main game. because this proves that the 6 aren't on humanity's side like much of the cast believes, bahamut isn't acting for the sake of humanity or the world they're acting to bring forth this prewritten script. i think this is my least favorite dlc, it's very messy writing wise.

skimming through the cancelled dlc and dawn of the future, the dlc since episode ignis seemed to have been veering off in a new direction probably best that it was cancelled because this new thematic direction would have been better tackled in a sequel or side game. in main ffxv the gods are distant and fate is a reassurance a comfort that one has purpose in life. where as the dlc episode ignis and ardyn are about the flipside of that how destiny and fate can also be a shackle, it's about defying the gods.

Like they wanted ardyn to be this kind self sacrificial healer but then dropped that character trait with no continuity like they could have made it that he had a savior complex and ego but that didn't come through or they could have made it about how he felt the people owed him and now feels betrayed by everyone but i didn't get that either. btw quarantine and prevention and vaccination are scientifically better than curing individuals when it comes to infectious diseases irl. so ardyn's characterization is someone who cares about the small scale and individual even when it's to the detriment of the greater whole, and that characterization got dropped. there's also how ardyn's turning evil only happened in the last like 30 years so his turn towards revenge narratively feels rushed it would have been nice seeing the daemonification and memory reading eating at him in stages. or i mean there was 2000 years could have had him conscious the whole time and stewing in misery turning over the same thoughts over and over reliving aera's death and having that drive him insane. oh yeah and bahamut pops up out of no where. bahamut is so plot breaking it begs the question why he didn't intervene in main game more.

dawn of the future great lunafreya is alive again. see this is the problem of having plot breaking super gods you cheapen their original deaths by making death meaningless. now that can be an interesting story in of itself but it contradicts xv main game's themes. this is also the luna ardyn show where as in maingame these two are barely secondary characters. noctis, gladio, ingis, and prompto are the main characters of ffxv butt they aren't plot important so don't show up here at all. all this definitely should have been a separate game. yeah all of this dc should have been a separate story imagine if we got lunafreya as the main character. like hey remember what i said earlier about ardyn absorbing miasma as a parallel to lunafreya? also wasn't the oracle bloodline holding back the darkness aka the apocaylse happened when ravus died well since the writers brought luna back shouldn't that change. i think the writers didn't think through killing luna. she's so lore important but she does nothing in main game. see they flip the script of noctis being the chosen king instead he just happened to be the dude around when ardyn woke up which is interesting but again very very different thematically from main game. wow the writers really went wild with this, kinda cool really good concepts but this and maingame are separate stories.

see fiction needs rules that's how you build tension when you throw the rules out the window things just become a mess with no stakes. which can be interesting and also very post modern absurd but that's not what's happening here. like so much emphasis was put on the cost the ring of lucii and king powers have. that regis is aging faster than he should that it took noctis 10 years to absorb the ring's half of the power and then to throw it out or how ardyn was showed to have daemonified pernamently with no way to cleanse the miasma and then haha jk there's no consequences because gentianta healed them! that's such an asspull you build up all these stakes only to say last minute that they don't matter. which again can be done for a thematic point like the writers could have really leaned into how humanity are just playthings and the gods have absolute power and decide the facts of the world (like yeah get meta and absurd with it kill luna 45 times and bring her back, nothing has meaning nothing matters!) but the writers didn't succeed in this and also this type of story is very difficult to tell.

thinking about this more and totally could have been a side game or compilation of episodes. Persona 2 did it where Eternal Punishment overwrote the ending of Innocent Sin and the two are rather tonally and thematically different.

[a-mag-a-day]

MAG 50 - apple cutting

I had a reaaally hard time following these old statements, here we go…

"Dear Jonah" - ¬‿¬

"allow yourself some respite, or at the very least take some further secretarial staff into your employ" / "And it is this imminent departure that has had such a freeing effect upon my pen." / "I have been fearful that accusations of slander might dog me, were my tale to be set down, but with a boat to the new world beckoning, and your sterling reputation for discretion, I feel it may at last be time to divest myself of the disquieting scenes I have witnessed." / "Henry was very effusive about the talents and prospects of young Mr. Scott, and was at great pains to inform me that his young protege also received certain architectural tutelages from Sir Robert himself." - And here I was thinking I'm good at English xD That's probably the reason why I can't quite focus on those old statements. Tbf nowadays it's unusual to casually come across old English texts, so it's not really necessary to familiarize myself with those for my use. (It's not that I don't know the words - I mean a few I actually don't know, tutelages for example - just the way it is written is so different and I have to concentrate way more than usual)

"The plight of the poor and destitute has been a national disgrace" - WHAT? opening dict.cc and looking up "plight" and "destitute" sigh This episode might take a while…

"it was an undertaking I embarked on with no small amount of zeal." - crying in not a native speaker (oida T_T)

While copy-pasting all those quotes I totally lost the thread what's the rambling even about…

more crying in not a native speaker I would have to copy half the statement if I wanted to quote every sentence that made me go "the hell is he talking about???"

"Then from the other side that firm oak door, I would hear the strangest sounds, muttering and shouting. It was always in George’s voice alone. I could never quite discern the words. It often sounded as though he were in some great distress, and on more than one occasion I was within minutes of summoning a constable to assist in breaking through the door, when he would emerge, glistening from exertion and holding completely redone drawings. I’m sure I even saw blood on his collar once." - ??? I don't get it (plot-wise I mean)

Heading over to Patreon to send in a question for the next stream, which will be "Jonny, can you pls explain this episode to me like I'm dumb!!!"

"“Balance,” he told me. “Equilibrium. The hardest thing for an architect to achieve." - I've graduated from art school and we did have a bit of architecture and this makes me think of a hanging model. The most famous one is by Antoni Gaudi. Basically, by using chains you create an upside-down model of a building. The arches, which will be formed by the weight of the chains and gravity are supposed to help structural engineering. It's been over a decade since I graduated (T_T), I don't remember all the details, but it's cool!

"To my dying day, Jonah, I will aver that no one entered the building before I heard the footsteps approach." / "The walls and floor seemed to rise towards me, stealing the air from my lungs until I swear that I could feel the splinters from the ceiling digging into the soft skin of my face." / "The room returned to its natural proportions, which is to say, it… never truly changed." / "Extending from the unblemished solid stone of the workhouse wall were four fingertips." - This does sound like The Seven Lamps of Architecture, could this be an early version of it? The one Leitner uses was published 1845, the event of the statement took place in 1836, so it could be possible?

"End statement." - Excuse me? It's "Statement ends"…

Aaaah yes, Tim being Tim! Classic! Seriously tho, the way this conversation is set up it's really not far-fetching to think two people are hooking up. Great comedy!

I'll be honest my eyes glazed over listening to this episode to find a quote for the opening post I had to listen to it twice and I'm still having a hard time understanding it xD

[xxbangchansidedishxx]

Chan’s Room- Chan X Felix.

Tw~ Degrading, Rough sex, Spanking, Exhibition???

Plot: Chan has a special guest for this episode of Chan’s room. But things didn’t go quite as planned.

Note; please send requests❤️

"Hello stayyy." He smiled as he looked into the camera. His body slightly hunched over hiding one of the members.

"We have a special guest on today's episode of Chan's room!"

Felix popped up from his hidden position with a cute little smile on his face.

"Aussie Aussie Aussie!"

The two giggled and began to interact with their fans.

"So what song recommendations do you guys have today?'

~comment: Love talk-wayv.

"How about that one channie?"

Felix questioned reading out the comment.

Chan had been avoiding playing this song for months and Felix knew exactly why.

The song was suggestive to say the least, but there was no getting out of it now.

"I - uh yeah okay."

The music began to play from the speakers and Felix started to dance around in his seat.

The younger Australian ran his hands through his hair biting his lip to match the vibe of the song.

He smirked as from the corner of his eye he saw Chan gulp and flush red.

"It's hot in here isn't it? Look you've gone all red."

Felix proceeded to take off his jumper to reveal a thin tight black shirt underneath. He knew exactly what he was doing to the elder and he was having fun with it.

"You know if you are hot you could just take off your jumper?"

He knew that wasn't possible since Chan didn't wear shirts underneath.

The song came to a stop and the two continued to interact with stays.

~comment: Chan how have you been?

"I've been doing good actually. The other day me and Lix-"

He was cut off from his sentence when he felt a hand squeeze his thigh.

He shot a warning glance at his friend and continued his sentence.

"The other day me and Lix went out for food with Jackson from Got7. Yeah and it was really nice."

~comment: what did you order?

Felix read out the comment as he trailed his hand further up Chan's thigh, it was now running dangerously close to his growing erection.

"I uhh I ordered a burger and Felix had s-steak."

His voice cracked and he stuttered as Felix was now palming him through his trousers.

The sight of the elder man so desperate to come undone but trying so hard to keep what was happening a secret was turning Felix on beyond belief.

A small whimper left Chan's lips causing Felix's eyes to shoot wide open. He acted as if he had no idea what was happening and he read out a comment.

~comment: Chan are you okay?

"I- yeah I'm fine. I just remembered I have to end the live a little early today. We have schedule and I completely forgot."

Carefully not to give themselves away Chan brushed Felix's hand off his crotch and stood up to hug the camera.

"Thank you for spending your evening with me, goodbye stays goodbye baby stays."

The two waved goodbye to the camera before finishing up.

Felix was pushed against the sofa.

"Oh you are gonna pay for what you did back there baby boy."

Chan growled into his ear, attaching his lips to the youngers neck, wasting no time to cover him in hickys.

"Mmmh I'm sorry daddy."

Chan began to rip their clothes off until they were separated by nothing but the thin material of their boxers.

He attacked Felix's lips exploring his mouth roughly with his tongue as he grinded his hips against the boy Beneath him.

"Such a naughty little slut for daddy aren't you?"

All Felix could do was moan in response.

"Awe my little fuck toy is lost for words."

Chan just chuckled and leaned down to tease the boys sensitive nipples with his tongue, lapping at it slowly before moving onto the other and nibbling at it causing Felix to Yelp.

"What were you thinking trying to get me off infront of stay hm?"

Before he could get a response he leaned down to roughly kiss him again. Teasingly his fingers circled the boys nipples which were wet with salava before flicking them mercilessly while Felix whined into his mouth.

The younger was desperate, his cock ached for release from the tight restraints of his boxers and Chan could tell.

He slowly pulled them down Felix's legs admiring his cock as it sprung free.

A pink blush flushed over the bottoms cheeks.

"P-please touch me daddy." He bit his lip in anticipation.

"Shh baby, you've been naughty and naughty boys get punished, turn around."

The younger gulped as he obeyed his orders.

A loud gasp left his lips as he felt Chan's hand come into contact with his ass creating a loud smack sound and a sting.

"I want you to count for me. Take your punishment like a good little boy and then I'll reward you."

His hand smacks against Felix's ass again

"Mmh fuck o-one."

He cried out the pain making his eyes water and his leaking cock rut up against the leather of the sofa.

"T-two."

Chan's hand caressed the youngers ass, each smack getting harder leaving red stinging marks.

It felt like the punishment was going on for ages and Felix was a stuttering mess.

"Ouch mmh f-fifty."

He panted catching his breath.

"You did so well baby boy."

Chan flipped the boy over and helped him onto his knees before removing his own boxers and rubbing his dick against the boys lips.

"Suck." He demanded.

The elder threw his head back and let out a groan as Felix gave soft kitten licks to the tip, lapping at his slit before sucking slowly at it and taking it down his throat. His tongue traced the bulging veins in his cock and he hummed around him in pleasure causing it to twitch.

"Fuck, your mouth is so wet baby. I'm gonna cum."

He pulled his cock from the youngers mouth and positioned himself behind him.

"P-please."

Felix tried to press his ass against Chan's cock but he moved away teasingly.

"How pathetic. I wonder what stay would say if they saw you here begging for my cock like a little whore."

He growled grabbing a fistful of Felix's hair to pull his head to kiss him messily.

He looked at the boys face. Lips swollen cheeks flushed red, eyes narrow and begging for more.

He began to rub the tip of his cock against the youngers ass slowly to tease him.

"Daddy please need your cock." He whined.

That's when Chan slammed into the boy causing him to let out a low groan as Felix cried out with pain and pleasure.

"So fucking tight baby, your ass feels so good around my cock."

He rocked at a steady pace hitting the boys prostate with each thrust.

The sound of skin against skin and whimpers filled the room.

"F faster please."

Felix could barely speak at this point.

"Awe my little cumslut wants more hm? You take my cock so fucking well baby."

He picked up his pace, roughly slamming in and out of his tight hole.

His hand held tightly onto Felix's throat applying just enough pressure to drive him crazy.

The bottom blabbered in pleasure.

"Mmh Ugh I- fuck uh I'm gonna cum mghh."

Felix shot his load making a mess all over himself as his ass clenched around Chan's cock causing him to release inside the boy.

The two panted, riding out there highs before Chan pulled out admiring the cum dripping out of the boys ass.

"You look so fucked out and pretty baby."

Felix blushed harder as Chan spread his legs wide and licked at the cum leaking from his hole. His tongue circled around the pulsing entrance, lapping up the mess he had made before he went up to kiss Felix on the lips.

"That was amazing Channie."

Felix cuddled into the mans side feeling content until he saw something from the corner of his eye.

His eyes immediately widened and he sat up grabbing a cushion to cover himself with.

"Lix what's wrong?"

Chan's voice was full of concern.

"Look at your phone..."

Chan walked over to his phone and his mouth dropped open as he saw it.

Comments. Thousands and thousands of comments.

~comment: umm what???

~comment: fuck this is so hot.

~Comment: oh god I can't take this.

~comment: they're literally... I- I'm not complaining.

He forgot to end the live.

Thousands of people had just seen him railing his band member.

He chuckled nervously.

"Oh haha Um hi stay. I guess I didn't end the vlive properly. Well I- Yeah."

Felix burned red with embarrassment as Chan just dug the hole even deeper trying to figure out what he could say to get them out of this mess.

"Well I guess me and Lix are gonna go now. Goodbye stay. Goodbye baby stay."

Despite the awkwardness and embarrassment he felt Chan still ended the live with a hug. One hand covering his cock and the other wrapping around the camera, his abs in full view of the camera.

This time he made sure to end the live properly.

"Chan it's all over Twitter."

Felix groaned covering his face.

Chan just walked over to him embracing him in a hug.

"As awful as this whole situation was... it's kinda hot tho don't you think?"

He smirked at the younger who blushed and shyly agreed.

"Don't worry. Everything will be okay. But I suppose we better get dressed and arrange a meeting with JYP and the boys."

The two cleaned up their mess before preparing to face their band members.

[katnissmellarkkk]

Aight, I need to do my biology stuff because I don’t know what’s going on in that class but instead I’m blogging a chapter of Catching Fire 😎

And no I never completed my Hunger Games Re-Read, I decided to go back later and just do my favorite chapters 🥰🥰🥰

Here we goooo :

All Katniss ever thinks about is her odds of being killed and the probability of getting away 😭

Oh wait ... that’s actually depressing 😔

“But the Victory Tour makes that impossible. Strategically placed almost midway between the annual Games, it is the Capitol's way of keeping the horror fresh and immediate” — I mean, it’s also a convenient time for the plot too. 😏 Suz, you ain’t sly.

“to look down into the faces of the families whose children I have killed...” — okay, kitten, let’s not get dramatic you didn’t kill all their children just a few. 😌

“The sun persists in rising, so I make myself stand.” — twitter has destroyed this quote for me it’s all the 17 year old stans bio 😭😂

“But now that Gale has gone to work in the coal mines - and I have nothing to do all day - I've taken over the job” — oh wow how depressing 🥺 having nothing to do all day

Aww that’s actually quite sad. Gale and her friendship basically disintegrated after the first book. So technically we only ever saw their friendship as it was in the first chapter of the first book wow

“I get a good haul from the traps - eight rabbits, two squirrels, and a beaver that swam into a wire” — sweetie what are you gonna do with a beaver? 🦫 😭😭😭 “everyone gather about, we’re having some beaver for dinner tonight”

Suz must have studied things like snares and crap because I have zero clue what she’s even describing here 🤷🏼‍♀️

Lololol Prim and her mom are like “we’re good with being rich” while Katniss is like 😑😑😑😑

“a pair of expensive machine-made shoes that my mother thinks are more appropriate for someone of my status” — they legit give like zero context about her and her mother’s interactions but it always reads to me like the mom in all those movies where the girl is “not like the other girls” and she’s all “I need to be free!” And her mom is like “no you can’t you gotta be a lady” and idk where I was taking this but we went somewhere and got lost didn’t we? 😅

Considering how much Katniss hates the new house in Victor’s Village .... do you think her and Peeta move to her old shack post canon??? I don’t think so because I feel like what she’s missing is her old life here and the house doesn’t matter and in the end Prim is dead either way so .... but just a thought 🤷🏼‍♀️

“You're hideous, you know that, right?" I ask him.” — direct post mockingjay everlark quote, clearly 😂😂😂😂

“The mines weren't an option, what with a baby to look after, but she managed to get laundry from some of the merchants in town.” — 12 year old Peeta just handing Gale’s mother his old undies 😂😂😂😂😂

“In winter her hands got so red and cracked, they bled at the slightest provocation.” — that was me during corona last winter ☹️ and I told one of my instructors about it and she was just like “gross 😒”

“Our romance became a key strategy for our survival in the arena. Only it wasn't just a strategy for Peeta. I'm not sure what it was for me. But I know now it was nothing but painful for Gale.” — I do wonder if Gale had never been a thing if Katniss would have let herself give into her feelings sooner. Probably not the brat is stubborn

“Gale told me that Greasy Sae, the old woman who serves up soup, started a collection to sponsor Peeta and me during the Games.” — I like that it was for both of them and not just Katniss who Sae knew. Because at the end of the day they were both kids who needed help 🥺🥺🥺🥺

“It was supposed to be just a Hob thing, but a lot of other people heard about it and chipped in.” — that’s actually really sweet that Katniss and Peeta united their own district unintentionally just couldn’t unite the whole country

Katniss is so nice, trying to support all the vendors equally 🥺🥺🥺 Katniss is the og “buy local!” “support small shops!” girl.

Okay, Katniss thinking of Haymitch even tho he’s a butthole is so sweet bc it shows that she truly cares for the drunk 🥰🥰🥰

And also ... Ripper, the liquor salesperson, only has ... one arm? So Peeta don’t stand out with a robotic leggy in Twelve?

Lololol the Head Peacekeeper (who has sex with girl’s Katniss’s age) is like “don’t buy alcohol, little girl” “just let me buy you”

Omg the Gale being the cousin thing is introduced 😅

That one post about how Peeta and Gale are likely both her cousins but Peeta is probably even closer to related is living in my head, rent-free 🤐

“But you've got to go through it to get to the end of it,” Is such a good quote.

“The houses inhabited by my family and Peeta give off a warm glow of life. Lit windows, smoke from the chimneys, bunches of brightly colored corn affixed to the front doors as decoration for the upcoming Harvest Festival.” — I’m sorry, is Peeta decorating his house for holidays alone? We get no indication of any of his family ever visiting him, ever. I’m sorry, we can say whatever about Peeta being more fortunate than Katniss and the others materialistically, but he’s so lonely, it makes me sad 😔.

Okay Haymitch’s house sounds over the top nasty 🤢.

“Over the years the odors of liquor and vomit, boiled cabbage and burned meat, unwashed clothes and mouse droppings have intermingled into a stench that brings tears to my eyes.” — this is one of those houses they broadcast on Animal Planet, because they usually have wild, neglected dogs in the backyard 😑😑

Omg, the image of Katniss just casually sitting in the windowsill while Haymitch swings his knife around is peak comedy 🤣. And sort of depressing.

“Look, if you wanted to be babied, you should have asked Peeta." — because Peeta takes care of people, he’s a comforter 🥰🥰🥰🥰

Katniss feeling an underlying longing for Peeta, because she develop the feeling in the cave and she still misses it. 😍😍😍 yes, I will be doing this reread through my shippers goggles, I’m glad you asked, Barbara.

Katniss always describes Peeta in so much detail 😅😅😂😂😂. Like every time he’s introduced into the book, she takes an entire paragraph to describe his hair, his build, his skin. He’s always been coded as the love interest from chapter one of book one.

“You can barely even notice his limp now,” means you can still notice it a little… and I’m sad 😢 again.

I just realized Katniss spent this entire conversation, sitting in the window above the sink 😅😅🤣🤣🤣🤣😅😅. She perch. Like a bird.

Also sidebar but I’m sentimental 🥲🥲🥲. This scene, out of context, was the first scene I ever read in the series. I stole my friend’s book so I’d have something to do before my 8th grade teacher kicked me out for being a chatterbox and anyways I opened to this page, read this part and still remember it. And also I always shipped Everlark, even from this alone, because I love tension, angst and a tumultuous past between characters.

“My mother's been working day and night to make everything perfect for the cameras, so it's no time to be tracking up her shiny floors.” — my mom before the family comes on Thanksgiving and 4th Of July 😒

Girl, I wanna know what would happen if you stopped protecting your mama and let her be the adult. Would she actually fail again like you think or would she be fine this time??? Ok anyways irrelevant side note but I had nowhere else to put it and she was trying to assure her mother just here that everything was fine.

Ummm Snow is a small man???? Why do I never remember that? I’m just imagining the teacher in Clueless now as President Snow 😭😭😭😭

Okay those are all my thoughts thank you for reading if you did which is probably like one of you 😅😅😅😅😅. Thank you to my one reader!

Tagging @everlarkedalways since this post isn’t showing up in the tag 😔

[siren-virus]

ok, It's been a long while since I've sent an ask, and though that can be atributed to life being life, that can only go so far and these previeous 3 days I've been lazing around mostly XD So, in order to compensate, here's the asks for Free and SWUP that have entered my brain and I haven't filtered out yet that I'll send you. Answer as you see fit for I might send repeated questions or some that have already been aswered before in another form.

For SWUP, would SWUP (Does she have another name? I can't remember) ever try a work somewhere? She has to get money somehow if she wants to be able to buy food, clothes, a home, and pay for all the medical expences she might have to go through. What other friends would she have other than wine aunt and coffee barista? I remember you said there might be a third one who's not really relevant, but whos father is, and you were still unsure on wether to include them or not. Also, the humans in this Earth, how much do they know about aliens? The Unicorns and Dragons? I imagine that considering the amount of damage they can do when they fight, and considering that apparently their experiments on abducted humans that they leave on Earth for like a month before taking them forever, would make them fairly known, and have something like a world agency looking out for different cases or something, however succesful they actually are.

Now onto Free, Is there any chance that we could get to know of any of the friends that the rag-tag group would make along the way of the travels? Like, there HAS to be someone who they befriend without any shennanigans involved at the very least, or with minimal ammount of them, just as there HAS to be a friend made after a disaster of cataclismic proportions happens that inebitably onvolves the found family. Also, how long was Leo outside on his own before bird friend (forgot his name) found him and started to get them back to the Domes? Considering that they have a long adventure, I imagine that he spent at least a month outside without an idea of any direction he was going, and getting lost along the way because of course he gets lost, before he was found. Would the team find anyone else who was part of the Domes but left of their own volition too? Another traveler similar to Leo, but that doesn't want to return to those places for X or Y reason? Would there be anyone from the Domes that they meet that DIDN'T want to leave the Domes in the first place but got out regardless? This could be for whatever reason, from kidnapping to exhile to attack to the Dome to simply escaping from a bad situation.

oop sorry for taking a bit to get back to you,

youre questions make me realise how under developed my stories are wheeezee so i rlly appreciate your questions!!

SWUP aka Vicky her human alias. or I guess the unicorn is the alias. AH SHIT I DIDNT EVEN THINK OF THAT!! Originally when i made SWUP she was supposed to be in high school. But as i grow I also like my characters to grow with me. Maybe I'll get her a job as one of them gym buddies (it has to be a job that allows for some form of freedom, enough to like be able to do th vigialnte thing- (i forget the name) Medical expenses aren't too bad, I'm basing it off aus medical- which means medicare! Plus she doesn't need the hospital all that often, she can regenerate.

In terms of friends she doesn't have many not because she socially inept (like myself)- she was very popular in highschool, but there isn't many people she can relate to. Her best friend James (pending name) comic book nerd that loves super heroes is all she's got. And some gym bros, but they're just friends at the gym, outside complete strangers. I really do want James to be relevant to the plot and not his dad and daddy issues, but he's a bit hard to squeeze in. Maybe if I sat down to actually do some writing, maybe--- ALAS I am but a creature of laziness, and poor attention span. (im barely focusing on Flee atm and I rlly wanna try developing GECKO again fml)

Humans know little to nothing about aliens (excpet for like the government and so wackos who a really into scifi) So even though SWUP is doing her best to help ppl, she's seen as a horrifying villain that is stage one to an alien invasion. (the scifi wackos play a part in that.) Although most Police officers appreciate the help... most.

Suprisingly no, most humans who were mutated into unicorns almost seem to disappear, SWUP is an exception. Why is that hmmmmmmmm? this is kind of a big moment, if I ever plan to push this idea to the webcomic/animation stage, youll see.

There's not really an official .org agency or anything like that, but some wackos who love space, and an actual scientist or 2. So far they have deducted that unicorns are evil space creatures who prey on humans and consume their flesh to get stronger so they can lay eggs and take over the world. There's not a lot of truth to that. Some parts tho... but which part? At the moment I'm really into mystery- so maybe I'll add some mystery elements, or I'll give it to GECKO. first i gotta redesign Mac, poor lad is not a looker I'l tell you that.

FLEE I barely know their friends either- haven't gone about developing them. HOWEVER. I do have a villain in mind. I remember making him for my illustration class back in uni (sigh uni days...) I dom't have a name, but I have a face. He's a big leader of this village known for killing the hybrid/mutants. He and his crew, a rag-tag gun loving, truck driving, share-a-brain-cell, lot. How they've managed to become successful hunter bunch is unknown.

But one the friends I have developed enough is Bolt, who also comes with their own shennanigans and an old rusty bus. Techincally they don't need it because they're fast as fuck, but it helps to have around incase you get a goliath sand bobbit on your hands.

Tristian is the human, Leo is the bird friend. Actually Trisitian was out on his own for three days, he didn't cover much ground when he finally met Leo either- dumbass didn't bring enough food and water to last. He didn't even have a plan, just wanted to go out. The only reason Leo didn't send his ass running home was because something- or someone- pushed them far. far away. Oh my who could it be?

Tristians kind of a rarity, not many people leave the domes unless it's through underground passageways to other domes. Most people are blissfully unaware of the outside world. Not to say Tristians the only one who escaped, but he's the only one who's survived outside for so long. (dome people don't have any survival skills) The only reason Tristians gotten so far is dumb lucks and a hot headed bird friend.

[inessencedevided]

The Untamed, episode 45 - watching notes

I'm at this stage of fandom rn where it's really hard to concentrate on anything else 😅

Every song I listen to gets dissected for how it relates to wangxian

I need to concentrate on my thesis but instead I'm pondering how the untamed raises questions about collectivism vs individualism and how my western perception of that might differ greatly from a native chinese person or even the author's intention

Can't I just write my thesis about THAT?

Alas, I digress ...

Back to our regular programming :D

Last time one Sophie watches the untamed wwx went all Sherlock on us and used his formidable skills of deduction to expose Backpfeifengesicht's plan of killing everyone and blaming it on wwx

I've heard from several people that the next few episodes are their favourites, so no high expectations at all :D

Nobody wipes the blood on their chins away. Might be about the aesthetic

I adore detective-duo-wangxian so much!! Especially because wwx does 99% of the talking but then lwj will chime in with a single word and it's 100% devastating :D

If anyone knows any well written case-fics for these two, please, I need recs! (For after the show)

Backpfeifengesicht makes good one point and that is that jgy already is at the top of the cultivation world. So what does he gain from all this?

Or is it simply that he's afraid of wwx because he's a rebel and might act against him? (Don't answer that. I wanna find out through the show ;))

Wwx just casually revealed that he's been to cloud recess and that he handles went to the restricted section forbidden chamber. What will you do about, Lan Qiren? Huh? 😂

Oooh! Backpfeifengesicht is the ghosted faced man! I thought it was Jiggy himself!!! 😱

That makes way more sense though!

Lan Sizhui! Jin Ling! Oh you brave boys! 😭

Someone hold me 😭

But why does he not take zidian now? He's done so before!

"You little fool!" Is "I love you" in Jiang-Cheng-speak :D

"We're done for! What can we do??" - wwx *strips*

Sorry

Bahahaha 😂😂😂

I just burst out laughing waaay to loudly for the fact that I've got people sleeping in the room next to mine

But look at Lan Qiren when he sees wwx strop to reveal anat is probably his nephew's undershirt 😂😂😂

He's probably questioning every decision that's let him to this point :D

This is completely inconsequential,but I couldn't keep quiet about it anymore because I every time he makes this motion, it always sends a shiver down my spine!!! Notice that wwx (or rather Xiao Zhan) is one of these people whose fingers bend in the opposite direction??? I know it's just a normal thing some people can do, but I can't watch it!! It makes my fingers hurt just looking at it 🙈🙈🙈

Is he turning himself into a demon lure flag?? 😱

Lan Jingyi 🥺🥺🥺

Also does wwx now just transfer his self-sacrificing tendencies to lwj?

Nothing is as hot as these two together in a fight scene

Jiang Cheng doesn't want to leave them behind. He does care! :') he just never unlearned how to unravel his love from his anger

Sizhui running up to greet his dads :')

Look at them! I'm soft guys 💔

He called him Yuan!! 😭😭😭

So this is it. Any doubts I ever had about Sizhui's identity are gone

Will he finally recognize him??

Why don't you say anything lwj? This one time, I beg you!!

Sect Leader Yao still at his gossip shit even 16 years later 🙄

Lam sizhyi is seasick! Why is this so cute! 😭

Oh Wen Ning!! He recognized A-Yuan? Right?

I want to hug Lan Sizhui for his openness and kindness towards everyone he meets, no matter their status or what other people say about them! (Wen Ning now or who he thought was Mo Xuanyu the supposed mad-man) and I wanna hug lan Wangji right after for raising him to be like this :')

Oh Wen Ning! 😭

That's how I'd look at Sizhui, too, if I met him - poor unadulterated wonder :')

And just think about what that means for Wen Ning! He's not the last of the Wens! All their fight wasn't for nothing. This child, their legacy, survived 😭😭😭

"Can I call you A-Yuan" "Of Course." God I'm gonna burst into tears 😭

I'm actually bursting into tears!!

Isn't this the dream of anyone who has ever lost someone? :')

"He's like a brother and father to me" :')

And he raised him from when he was 4 or 5? So ... A-Yuan was about 2 when the Wens died? Right? Then 5 would fit with lwj's 3 year isolation

Ob god, it's the butterfly-toy!!! 😭😭😭

Wen Nings smiling through his tears! I can't! 😭💔And he's got the one from the market!

Aww, wax isn't wearing the white undergarment anymore. Too bad

Oh poor Jin Ling ...

So much grieve that he could probably never process. There so many lost kids in this story, hurt by things they had no control over 😔

I mean, I get it. That's the person who killed his parents (without being in control, but he doesnt know that) and everyone is just talking to him as if it's normal and that didn't happen. But he can't forget,but he doesnt really understand either and he has no outlet. Of course he'd just ... crash 😥

And who would have thought I'd ever try at a flashback of Jin Zixuan's death :(

For once, it'd be nice if the adults actually acted like the parent figures they're supposed to be and explain things to their children 🤦‍♀️

I'm so thankful though, that no one even thinks of scolding him for crying. Jismg Cheng only asked who it was that made him cry (and looks like he'll kick their ass). Generally, thus show has a very healthy attitude towards tears. Most characters cry when they are faced with tragedy, regardless of gender. Men being allowed to have appropriate reactions to grieve (instead of a single men tear or just punching things) is really nice to see

Oh Yao dude whose courtesy name I can't remember, shut up!

Thanks Ouyang Zizhen! You get me

I live for these children standing up to their elders

Meanwhile Nie Huaisang is just on the sidelines, enjoying the show :D never change!

The Lotus Pier theme song alone is making me cry rn 😢

Why can't wen Ning come in?

Oh Sizhui!

He many times do you want to make me cry happy tears today?? :')

Little turnip-baby ❤

But why doesn't lwj say anything ??? 😭

Lan Wangji raised A-Yuan smong a bunch of rabbits??? 😭

Now he's a turnip baby with a taste for carrots, how cute is that? :')

Holy shit, wwx and lwj are really joined at the hip these days of lwj won't enter the hall if wwx isn't allowed to :D

Lwj 😑 "no misbehaviour"

Someone. Knows. Their. Husband.

Okay sorry, but as painful as these cuts must have been and yes, while you do see scars on this prostitute's face, they in no way warrant these horrified gasps as of they had all seen a monster 🙄

Xue yang. Fancy seeing you here in this not at all disturbing sub-plot 😬

Okay that's creepy. That's really creepy

Shouldn't Jin Guangyao have a bit more compassion for these women?

On the other hand, he was born to menacingly stand behind a curtain 🤷‍♀️

W. T. F. ????

Jin Guangshan??? o___O

That's the most skin we've ever seen on this show and it's in a scene like THIS? 😬

THIS IS HOW JIN GUANGSHAN DIED? 😱😱😱

How?

How can you die from sex?

And then jgy made them keep going?

UGH

These poor women :/

So there's someone who set her free on purpose, right?

Bicao has really interesting eyes!

Oh wait, took me some time to catch up. This is about Quin Su and why she killed herself, right?

WHAT??

They were siblings o_O

They just went full game of thrones on this ...

Hey Jin Guangshan, screw you for raping that woman

Wait, is that why jgy had him die like THAT?

I'm so confused about how that happened btw

But why would Jin Guangyao merry quin su anyway? Was this some kind of political marriage that he couldn't call off?

This episode answered some of my questions but raised about a dozen more 😅

@sweetlittlevampire @fandom-glazed @elenirlachlagos @allhailthedramallama @luckymoony @kyrrahbird @i-love-him-on-purpose

5 episodes to go. I'm both happy because I can't wait to brows the untamed tag without looking for spoilers and extremely sad 🥺

Right now I'm planning to watch one episode each day until friday and then watch the last two on Saturday, hopefully quite early, so I can spend the rest of the day crying my eyes out over it, without having to worry about such trivial things as being a functioning adult or a responsible student 😅

[aestuavis]

I have a question for you. I'm sorry if this seems a little odd. But I've been roleplaying on Tumblr for years now. With the obvious pull from the site, a lot of my roleplaying partners has left or just stopped completely. Myself included. But I want to start roleplaying again. I've been a follower of you for awhile now so I just want to ask one thing: how do you remain so active on your account?

[ hellu hellu ! omg it’s not odd at all, really ! no need to apologize ! i’ve been here for like ... six years ( wow, had it been that long ? ) i’ve seen so many people come and go, have lost a few partners and gained new ones along the way but it had been really enjoyable journey for me. okay, i’m not sure if my advice would be anything useful but i’ll try my best !

tbh, there are a few things that help me stay active and not lose motivation here. one of those is the fact that this blog is a multimuse.

i cannot stress this enough, and i’m not sure how long you’ve been following me but those who had been with me since the very beginning would know that i started this blog as a single-muse blog with only akane as my muse. that was six years ago. along the years, i’ve added other protectors, then adding a whole list of my side muses to expand on that. this, right here, is what helping me keep my motivation on being active. this is due to the fact that, no matter how much i love akane, there would come a time where i have run out of ideas to write with her. it doesn’t mean i love her any less as a muse, but it’s because i’ve expanded and written so much for her that i’ve hit a kind of block to move forward. this is where having multiple muses on the same blog come into play, and this is why i like having multimuse blog where i have many muses in one blog than having many blogs that i have to jump around all the time.

when i don’t feel one particular muse, and i’m sure everyone has that day where you don’t feel your muse, you can move to other muses that fit your emotions, your feelings, and your mood at that moment in time. i find this to be very helpful, tbh ? like really helpful for me who had so little time after my full day of work ( i work 9-6 weekdays. ) some days i’m really stressed, and i don’t want to write heavy things, so i would lean towards writing muses who are more lighthearted, and cute, for example. having one blog containing many different muses help me juggle my own state of mind and churn out content that i’m able to create without stressing myself out too much !

another important part for me is to take a break when you need to. when real life things are getting too much, or your time to be online is lessened, when things are too busy for you to be online, don’t force yourself to be here. treat roleplaying as it is, a stress-reliever and a hobby. you’re supposed to have fun instead of feeling pressured to write. you’d lose motivation to roleplay so easily when you force yourself to create while your mind isn’t in the condition to. i actually had taken many hiatus before, ranging from a month to longest was six months, i think ? but i find myself coming back because writing is one way for me to relieve stress and to let my creativity run wild ! i’ve been blessed by such wonderful people and mutuals who had been so understanding that my activity is sometimes sporadic, and i can take quite a bit to answer threads. i’m fortunate to have them being patient and kind with me !

lastly, communication. roleplaying without talking to your partners could end up with either of you running out of ideas or thoughts to continue the threads. i find that talking to my partners had helped me think of scenarios, to skip the repetitive first meeting or do some memes/asks that has timeskip towards where the muses are more acquainted can help you renew the feel to write when you’re stuck at a scenario ! i’ve met so many people and made so many friends during my time here. roleplaying is creating stories with your partners, after all, so talk to them, bounce ideas off one another, and have fun !

i’m not sure if these advices are helpful for your case or not, but please feel free to message me anytime if you need to talk ! you can always come off anon and nudge me in my IM if you wish to plot something or get back to writing ! i’d love to help you get back to roleplay again and write with you ! X33 hope you have a wonderful day on your end ! ]

[kittenshift-17]

Hi I hope you're doing ok I just wanted to ask a question. What do you think of Daenerys from game of thrones,I'm sorry its really random right but I've always wanted to know.oh and those christmas stories are really great are you going to continue those or were they just a one shot ? And as always I love you and you're writing.

Christmas stories? You mean the 👀👀👀 side-eye ask-responses fics? Because they weren’t Christmas stories, so much as people sending those “inviting creators to share something in progress that they wanted to finish in 2019, but didn’t manage to” asks to me and me sharing snippets of WIPs. Eventually all of them will be completed fics and will be shared on the appropriate archives, but until then, they’re just sitting in my “In Progress” folder, waiting to be worked on.

As for you query about Dany, I’m very on the fence about her. Throughout the books and the early seasons of the TV show, she’s my least favourite character because she’s so far removed from all the other plotlines all the way over across the Narrow Sea. There are some sections in the middle where I quite liked her, and I confess that in Season 7, I was all for having her take over as Queen of Westeros.

Unfortunately, D & D ruined that. And though I can see WHY they had to play it that way from an author’s perspective (particularly since they’re not the original authors, essentially making the last couple of seasons a D & D version of fanfic, if you think about it), I didn’t like her by the end. She went too far (no matter how Cersei pushed her to get there) and honestly, she became too hell-bent on ruling the world. Early on, her acts of violence were all for the sake of rescuing the oppressed and championing freedom. She weeded out injustice and beat it back with fire and blood, and that was great. 

The continuity of that is where D & D (I beleive) were trying to take it all, but they forgot one uncomfortable thing.

When she overthrows the Khals, she rescues the men and women of the hoard and the vast number of peoples they enslave. When she overthrows the Masters of Pentos, she resuces the enslaved and downtrodden. When she overthrows the Salvers mutilating boys for their armies, she’s resucing future generations of boys from that fate. When she ‘overthrows’ Cersei, on the other hand, she rescues no one. She loses sight of doing it to protect the innocent and to help the down-trodden. Instead she roasts those very same innocent, frightened, downtrodden, terrified people of King’s Landing alive, and for what? 

Power. Revenge. 

There is a theme throughout her timeline that she defies those who look down on her and those who say no to her, and she does do ruthless things to the people who refuse to support her cause, but she was perceieved to temper it throughout those things as a champion for the weak because she herself had once been weak.

She loses sight of that when she faces Cersei. And in fairness, Cersei is a vicious cunt who deserverd far worse than was done to her throughout the series, but Dany lost it. The saying of the Targaryens being doomed to madness or greatness was supposed to fall on the line of greatness with her. Under her reign, I beleive Westeros could have been properous and happy. But D & D, just wanted to do a big scene with the dragon(s) I think. 

And okay, yes, being traded to the Dothraki for their army and treated like a common whore by Viserys made her brittle, and losing Khal Drogo hurt her deeply. Losing Viserion to the Night King, and Rhaegal to something so stupid as a lance in broad daylight when the beast could literally have flown in any direction to dodge it was just dumb. That broke her, I think. To couple it with the ‘betrayal’ of Jon’s true origins and the threat he then posed to her rule, and then losing Missandei to Cersei’s bitchiness definitely pushed her over the edge, I think. All of these things would certainly have fucked with her mental health, and it’s not unreasonable to state that she could’ve slipped into madness.

Which I suppose, is the point, in the end, isn’t it? She becomes the very monster she slayed so many times for the sake of her people, and she acts in the ways she has always done when the people in between her and her throne won’t bend the knee, and give her what she wants. The only thing that changes is that she loses sight of who is an enemy, and who is just a helpless victim.

And I empthaize with that. The longer you spend as a survivor, the less you recall the days of only being a victim. The longer you spend rising above your trauma, the less patience you have for those wallowing in their own. It becomes easy to forget that those other victims are scared and helpless and suffering, when you want them or need them to be strong, and brave, and valiant. By the time Dany reaches King’s Landing, most of her army is destroyed. Two of three dragons dead, her lover a traitor (and her nephew, ewwww) her friend captured and killed, and so all of these things could and probably should have broken her again, like the crying, broken, helpless girl who let herself be sold for an army, and raped like a helpless female dog. 

Throughout the series we watch her overcome the early trauma, and we watch the way she learns to solider on in the face of new traumas, too. They’re hurting. They’re like limbs being hacked off, I’d imagine, but she’s got to go on. She doesn’t have the luxury of breaking down in tears. She is Khaleesi. The Unburnt. The Breaker of Chains. She can’t just crumple. She’s got an army at her back relying on her strength and her guidance. 

She’s toughened, maybe a little dead inside by the end after all she loses.

So she has no patience for those victims still in the early stages of their trauma journey. The small folk of King’s Landing know suffering under Cersei, but they’ve seen everyone else who stood up to the Lannisters decimated in one way or another. Ned, beheaded. Renly, slain. Robb, beheaded. Catelyn, slain. Stannis, slain. The Tyrells, murdered. All three of Cersei’s children were killed, too, but just like Dany, she soldiered on. When all the other contenders have fallen beneath the mighty paws of the Lannister tyranny, what indiciation did any of them have that Dany would be any different? What else could they do, but follow orders or be beaten to death? Die on the outside of the gates by the hand of people claiming they want to protect you, or follow orders and scurry inside, beleiving that once again, the Lannisters will be the victors?

But Dany didn’t consider any of that, because everyone else she liberated hadn’t lived through battle after battle, war after war, watching their oppressors win. The Unsullied knew only how to follow orders, and being sold to a new Master meant doing only what they were told. The enslaved rose up against the masters because before Dany, only individuals had tried to fight back, not entire armies. When you are downtrodden and someone says, “Hey, if we all rise up, we can win” and it’s the first time anyone has tried, you are filled with naive hope and courage.

But the people of King’s Landing aren’t naive and courageous. They’d seen 5 kings rise and fall at the feet of the Lannister Queen, 6 if you count King Robert. Already, many had tried to rise up and overthrow her, and already all had failed. A new queen riding in, even on the back of a dragon, wasn’t enough to rouse them from their hard-learned slavery and acceptance. No one else had won before, so better to avoid trying again. Dany’s lack of understanding for that scenario - her unwillingness to heed what Varys and Tyrion tried to tell her to educate her about the way things worked in Westerous compared to Braavos - is ultimately what made her the monster she died as.

She refused to recall that others weren’t as brave as her; weren’t as hard-hearted as her; and she refused to recognize that the people she sought to ‘free’ had already been ‘freed’ five times over, at least, and still their tyrant queen stood tall. Dany’s impatience and her anger got the better of her thanks to the suppressed agonies she endured, and her unwillingness to see reason and understand that this time, things had to be different, was ultimately why she jumped into the role of brutal overlord doomed to die. 

I suppose, too, that when you flip the coin for madness or greatness, with only 2 Targaryens left on earth, you have to pick on, don’t you? Viserys was the mad one, and Dany the great one, but then Jon came along, and you flip it again, and to stay true to Jon’s nature throughout everything else, he must be the great one, so Dany has to be the mad one. 

So I suppose, in answer to your question on my thoughts about Danerys,  I’m... disappointed. She’s brave and brilliant and courageous in all she faces until excessive trauma makes her angry, makes her sloppy, and makes her foolish. She tries what she’s tried before and when it doesn’t work as it has every time before she throws a tantrum vile enough to end the world and to seal her fate, once and for all. I tolerated her until I liked her, and then I liked her until I didn’t. Now, I think of her as a tragic plot piece used, ultimately, to chart the course of valiant saviour to all right up until the Army of the Dead problem is resolved, a tool to batter down the walls without killing any more Starks in order to finally see Cersei dead once and for all, and then she’s tossed aside as being superfluous and in the way of the overall goal to see the Starks rise from the ashes of their destoryed family.

It’s hard to fathom in a tale with so many majoy players, but Jon Snow has always been the MAIN protagonist of the story; and everything else, including Dany, is all just circumstantial plot device to keep the story moving and to ultimately further Jon’s arc. That’s why he, alone, despite breaking every oath he took, and still trying to do what’s right, survives to the end, but gets no hero’s reward.

Based on what I know of G.R.R.M. from interviews he’s given and the overarching theme of this series as a whole, Dany’s end is fitting. You can’t stay a hero forever, you know? Eventually someone takes your hero’s crown or you become a tyrant to keep it, and someone else has to rise up and kill you, as you once rose up and slayed monsters, yourself. His whole schtick has always been that being a good person doesn’t mean you’ll get to live and doing the right thing for noble reasons will just get you killed sooner (Ned), but even those willing to do the wrong thing for the right reasons must pay their penance in the end. 

After all, valar morghulis.

[punkscowardschampions]

Janis & Jimmy

Janis: UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH Jimmy: ? Janis: Save you the details, want to brain my sister as per Janis: but I need to ask you for a huge favour on her behalf Jimmy: 🎻🎻🎻 Jimmy: hang on, let 'em play for a sec Jimmy: ... Jimmy: alright, go on Janis: 😑 Janis: don't you start Janis: well she's got a date that she doesn't want to go on, but is gonna 'cos it'll piss Mia off/potentially show her up Janis: aware this is like a bad, really bad, teen drama-edy but hold on Janis: but like she really doesn't want to go 'cos she's her and he sounds like a twat tbf so she wants to double-date it Janis: which, undeniably, would piss Mia off more so bonus if we can deal being around her Janis: we don't have to stay ages, do it for the 'gram and bounce, old skool Jimmy: 1. I was only taking the piss out of her, calm down Jimmy: 2. this is bollocks but I heard you at piss Mia off Jimmy: 3. where & when? Janis: 1. this is how she's got me rn soz like tread carefully boy 🐍 Janis: 2. I know Janis: 3. [Place and time] Janis: Don't worry, I'm paying if he don't offer, he's some posh kid Mia wants on/has been on, apparently Jimmy: I dunno where that place is but it sounds fancy as shit Jimmy: outfit crisis like Janis: Am I gonna have to talk you down in the changing room too, like Janis: well I've been instructed to look 🔥 so she's either #over you or trusts you to bring it, which is rude Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: calm me down in there if you wanna Jimmy: that'd be hot Jimmy: I always look 🔥 & this whole town knows it babe 👌 Janis: Might make shopping bearable, give you that Janis: 😏 Don't disagree Jimmy: let's go shopping then Janis: Easily persuaded, you 😂 Jimmy: you don't wanna? sounds fake Janis: Didn't say that Janis: Called you easy, little bit Jimmy: 💔 Janis: Awh baby Janis: so mean to you Jimmy: 😭 me Jimmy: enjoy your lattes everyone, nowt to see Janis: Such a 💔 mental image Janis: hope Pete is there to comfort you Janis: that's a sexy one Jimmy: your shout for 💔 'cause your boyfriend ain't in today Janis: Nooooooo Janis: won't bother coming in now Janis: what's the point Jimmy: I knew that's why you weren't rushing Jimmy: obvious you Janis: You know Janis: 'til I get his number, gotta keep you sweet Jimmy: keep me sweet enough I'll give you it Janis: How sweet is that then? Jimmy: I'd have to find where the manager's left everyone's contact details Jimmy: least a few sugars Janis: 😏 keep it in mind Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: let me know Janis: bit mad you couldn't even pretend you're having a torrid affair with him but still like ya Jimmy: bit mad you want me to instead of being jealous but still like you too Jimmy: suppose Janis: I can be jealous Janis: jealous and aroused Jimmy: yeah? Jimmy: I'll keep it in mind Janis: 👍 stuff Janis: what are you up to actually Jimmy: nowt Jimmy: what are you doing? Jimmy: other than plotting Gracie's murder Janis: Literally that's all I've got done today thanks to her 😑 Janis: one minute I'm helping her find outfits, the next she's telling me to fuck off basically Jimmy: 🙄🙄 Jimmy: must be catching Jimmy: Cass is in a right strop Janis: Cass no, don't let the side down Janis: you know why or just 'cos? Jimmy: the prospect of family dinner ain't got none of us full of the joys Jimmy: but I reckon she's mostly bored Jimmy: she ain't done nowt this hol really 'cause I'm always working & leaving her to look after Bobs Janis: Yeah, makes sense Janis: You Dad needs to find a proper childminder, like Jimmy: she used to be out with her mates loads before Jimmy: I don't know what to do Jimmy: can't be the dickhead arranging playdates for a 12 year old Janis: Well, Grace did say she'd babysit for you as thanks Janis: so if she met Bobs and he wasn't completely terrified of her Janis: Cass could go out for a bit, do her own thing Jimmy: that'd be decent Janis: I could also go round there, more reg like, take him and Twix out to the park Janis: even if it's like an hour, better than nothing, right? Janis: not like your Dad is there to nope it so Jimmy: 💕 Jimmy: actually Jimmy: You're just Janis: It's no big, you're the one actually working Jimmy: yeah but they ain't your siblings Jimmy: only your 🐶 Janis: Yeah but you know, they're alright, as are you Janis: it's only for the rest of the hols anyways Jimmy: steady on, gonna make me fall in love with you Janis: 😏 idiot Jimmy: I put a spare key out so you can go whenever you want Jimmy: Cass has lost 'bout 4 since we've been here Jimmy: reckon she only does it to piss my dad off Janis: Feel it Janis: he deserves it Jimmy: probably in the bin or summat Jimmy: find 'em all under her pillow Janis: making a statement necklace Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: she does usually wear it round, well spotted Janis: I 👀 all Janis: you've been warned Jimmy: gutted Jimmy: I better stop making eyes at the customers then Janis: How else you gon' get tips Jimmy: #where'sthejealousy? Jimmy: get yourself a girlfriend who don't give a shit, lads Janis: what you want me to be jealous for so bad? Jimmy: I'm just pissing about, Janet Jimmy: don't worry Janis: Likely story Jimmy: I miss you, there's one Janis: I miss you too Janis: and if you've been flirting with any old ladies Imma flip shit okay Jimmy: let's say I have 'cause I wanna see you fuck shit up at the CG Jimmy: & just see you Jimmy: so 👵💕 Janis: 😡😡😡 Janis: catch these hands deidra you old hussy Janis: get your own man Jimmy: have a heart babe he died in WWII Janis: probs look just like him Janis: least the dementia telling her so Jimmy: it's 'cause I'm so 💪 Jimmy: & got all them medals Jimmy: 🥇🥇🥇🥇 Janis: for being a prize dickhead, yeah Jimmy: 💔💔💔💔 Janis: don't act all devvo with me now, playing hero all afternoon Jimmy: come see me I'm so bored Janis: Have you saved up a break or nah Janis: real jealousy over them 🚬s Jimmy: yeah Jimmy: & I finish soon Jimmy: we can go shopping Janis: Yeah? Janis: Okay then Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: maybe I'll find something to cheer Cass up while we're there Janis: You're so nice Jimmy: nah, she's a good kid Jimmy: didn't ask for nowt of this Janis: Yeah Janis: none of yous did Janis: so you're still nice Jimmy: more my fault than hers that we moved Jimmy: wedding crashing & baby daddy drama, remember? 🙄 Jimmy: to hear my dad tell it like Janis: Yeah but that's like Janis: not actual is it Jimmy: don't stop him Jimmy: he'd have to take some blame then Janis: Heaven forbid Janis: My parents always act like they're blaming themselves but they just do it so people disagree Janis: dead sly Jimmy: sounds like when all your sister's mates say how much weight they've put on so the others will rush to say nah Jimmy: you ain't Tammy you're gorg babes! Janis: Literally 🙄 Janis: I hate that shit Janis: but I'm up myself for at least owning it and not forcing everyone into the pantomime okay Jimmy: I always wanna be like maybe don't order a croissant then, babes, but #tips so Janis: 😂 Janis: You're such a dick Janis: I love it, never change Jimmy: least your sister never eats owt Jimmy: even Mia orders shit to stare at Janis: they're all idiots Janis: just in different ways Jimmy: yeah, I got that Jimmy: probably spent more time with 'em these hols than you've ever had to Jimmy: you're welcome Jimmy: half of 'em are named after countries or colours Jimmy: ?? Janis: Basic from birth Janis: destined to be each other's shitty friend Jimmy: my dad did me that one decent shout Jimmy: tah, Ian Janis: 😂 Janis: Your name suits you Jimmy: hang on, what's yours again? Jimmy: gimme a sec & I can return the compliment Jimmy: Juliet, yeah? Very real Janis: Ha ha 🖕 Janis: It's an old woman's name so you should love it Jimmy: I knew I liked you for SOME reason Jimmy: there it is Janis: Your perviness never letting you down freak Jimmy: 💕 Jimmy: so romantic, babe Janis: That ain't why you're with me Jimmy: yeah it is, last of the greats, remember? Jimmy: twitter agreed Janis: How could I forget Janis: sent me my first nude awh 💕 Jimmy: did you want it then though? Janis: You were hot, wasn't gonna say no Janis: that fake sext was 🔥 Jimmy: I'm an artistic Jimmy: boy Janis: Yep, totally focused on your talent, boy Jimmy: I wanted to impress you Jimmy: for real Janis: 😊 Janis: Well, you did Janis: for real Jimmy: alright, good Janis: You know EVERY bitch was thirsting after you then why wouldn't I? Jimmy: I've told you before, you ain't like 'em Jimmy: & you could kiss me how you did & just walk away Jimmy: so Janis: Sorry to disappoint but you looked good Janis: and it was funny Janis: and you actually did it Janis: so Jimmy: I always look good, am funny & accept challenges Janis: Go out with me then Jimmy: I'll think 'bout it Jimmy: remind me who you are Janis: 💔 Janis: so harsh Jimmy: you want me to be kind, baby? Janis: yes Jimmy: come here then Jimmy: I'll be so kind Janis: 😍 Janis: Am I mean Jimmy: not to me Jimmy: I dunno how you're chatting to everyone else Janis: oh, exactly like this Janis: my technique Jimmy: nah then, you're 👌 Janis: 😏 Good good Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: why? Janis: Grace reckons I'm basically Hitler Stalin and Pol Pot in one Janis: if she knew who the last two were Jimmy: she's friends with Mia her judgement's for shit Janis: True Jimmy: do you reckon you're mean to her? Janis: No Janis: Unless I intend to Janis: she just overreacts Jimmy was timed out 4 days ago Jimmy joined the chat 4 days ago Jimmy: there's your answer then Janis: Yeah, you're right Janis: only doing this to piss off Mia Jimmy: #same Jimmy: & for the free babysitting 👌 Janis: 👍 too right Janis: cash that in whenever Janis: she thinks Bobby is cute Janis: hopefully a good thing, not a 🚩 Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: I know I ain't interested girl but you can the bar a bit higher Jimmy: aim* Janis: Under 13 is honestly not a #mood babes Jimmy: more about the over 50s but go on, like Janis: 😂 different strokes, I guess Janis: how non-shamey was that Jimmy: decent use of the word strokes Jimmy: 🏆 Janis: 🙇 Janis: I try Janis: 'til I get grey hair how else am I keeping you interested Jimmy: get to the hair salon, rich girl Janis: 😏 get a Brazilian blowout whilst I'm there Jimmy: I can't even fake 👍 Jimmy: stop Janis: I'm surprised you know what that is Janis: 100% sit with my sister and co and bitch about me, confirmed Jimmy: I don't but the threat was clear Janis: You're cute Jimmy: you're a dickhead Jimmy: but I like you Jimmy: & what the fuck is it then? Janis: not 100% what is Brazilian about it but Gracie comes out looking like a show pony Jimmy: not very beachy or hot weather appropriate but alright Jimmy: but not alright, nah Jimmy: don't Janis: it takes hours Janis: fat chance Janis: can think of better things to do Jimmy: if you ever can't, call me Jimmy: I can think of loads Janis: Good to know Janis: knew there was a reason I was dating you, like Jimmy: #formybrain Janis: Yep Janis: first thing I noticed 'bout you Jimmy: I get that a lot Jimmy: not right now though Jimmy: I'm so tired Janis: 😔 Janis: not a store room you can nap in Jimmy: ☕ shop, mate Jimmy: easy fix Janis: 🤢 Janis: you're gonna need to go 🚬 'fore you kiss me then Jimmy: demanding you Jimmy: but yeah it is 🤢 Janis: You're somehow just finding out? Okay Jimmy: piss off Janis: Just sayin' don't go spreading that around, you're meant to know exactly how demanding I am by now, Christ Janis: not that frigid Jimmy: I'm just saying piss off Janis: ? okay Jimmy: you're Janis: hello? Janis: 😴? Jimmy: I'm alive, no tah to you Jimmy: gimme more mental images of how demanding you are & finish the job like Janis: Ahh 😏 Janis: Nah, leave you wondering and hanging on Janis: bitch like that Jimmy: why I hate you so much Janis: I know Janis: Makes it more fun Jimmy: what happened to wanting me to be kind? Jimmy: fickle you Janis: 🤷 Janis: trying to keep you awake and on your toes, boy Janis: manager can thank me Jimmy: I'd rather do it Jimmy: Unless you're 😍 for him now too Jimmy: love a man of mystery, yeah Janis: 😂 yeah, you're too familiar now Janis: gotta go Jimmy: 💔💔💔 Janis: Poor baby Jimmy: 🎻🎻🎻 Jimmy: what the fuck are we gonna do on this double date? Jimmy: never done one Janis: Me either, oddly enough Janis: I hope she'd have picked someone else if it was a keys in the middle situation Janis: but maybe not, omg Janis: she's conned us Jimmy: Mia would pop up from behind a plant or summat Jimmy: lunge for you Jimmy: in a sexy/threatening way Janis: 😬 Janis: we gotta cancel rn immediately Jimmy: #cancelher Jimmy: 😂 Janis: Babe don't let her get me Jimmy: not gonna 💪 Jimmy: such a hero like that Janis: I won't let Grace wifeswap you Janis: not until I've 👀 this dickhead anyway Jimmy: tah Jimmy: like I said, them brazilian hair bollocks are doing nowt for me Jimmy: she'd end up disappointed Janis: 💔 Janis: don't need her pity so nah, not happening Jimmy: I'd have to hit up that look but don't touch girl for tips Jimmy: can't remember her name so Jimmy: just the weak ankles Janis: who Jimmy: exactly Jimmy: who's this lad then? big spender but what else? Janis: 🤷 Janis: Goes to a School Mia wishes but too thick that even money can't, appaz Janis: not white, I think she said Janis: ego Jimmy: 🙄 Jimmy: this is gonna be a right laugh, isn't it? Janis: You ain't gotta ride him Janis: we'll have a drink and go Janis: might be enough of a dick that is a laugh tho so Jimmy: if I have to watch your sister try I know that's a laugh Jimmy: seen it before Jimmy: her flirting is 🥇 Janis: 🙄 Don't remind me Jimmy: show 'em how it's done babe Jimmy: fancy places always have hot waiters Janis: Livin' for the dramatics always, you Jimmy: 'course Jimmy: #artist Jimmy: gotta suffer for that 🎨 Janis: use your 😥 to paint out that pain Jimmy: use my 😭 Janis: No half-measures Janis: I know, babe Jimmy: pete ain't here, you're gonna be off fucking the waiting staff Jimmy: I mean Jimmy: just 💔 Janis: Well we're all devestated about Pete, first of all Janis: where is he, what does he do with his free time Janis: so many unanswered questions Jimmy: he's in a band 🙄 Jimmy: I'm gonna drunk dial Barry, see if we can't hug it out Janis: OH BITCH Janis: really withholding that info from me weren't ya Janis: 🤤🤤🤤 100% the bassist Jimmy: he is yeah Jimmy: I've been on his insta 'cause that loved up like Janis: So hot Jimmy: 🤤🤤🤤 Janis: Even though I'm mad you're tryna keep him all to yourself Janis: dickhead Jimmy: first come first serve, Janet Jimmy: I saw him way before you Janis: Yeah but I really SEE him, you know? Janis: we've got a connection Jimmy: 💕 Janis: Groupie mode activated Janis: bet they're SO good Jimmy: [sends his like soundcloud or whatever people use idk 'cause obvs linked to the insta] Jimmy: 👍👍👍👍👍 Janis: Come thru, you stalker Jimmy: told you 😍😍😍 Jimmy: step your game up, Judy Janis: in stalking or being your actual bae Janis: #therealquestionsnogirlshouldhavetoask Jimmy: you don't have to ask it Jimmy: bit nosy you Jimmy: #stillnotadecentstalkerthough Janis: Not allowed to ask questions now Janis: that's your bit not mine anyways Jimmy: #stayinyourlane Janis: Friggin' cheek Janis: I'll stay home then 👌 Jimmy: nah you won't Janis: 😒 Jimmy: come on Jimmy: you know you've already left Janis: I could probably find Gracie Janis: follow the sobs Jimmy: go on Jimmy: if that's what you want Janis: shut up Janis: be nice Jimmy: make your mind up, girl Janis: No, just love me Jimmy: 💕 Jimmy: I want you, how's that? Janis: Works for me Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: I ain't had no ☕ so we can make it work Janis: You should've Janis: not that mad really Jimmy: got a sudden rush on Jimmy: no time Jimmy: fuck you Pete Janis: Ugh Janis: fuck off people Jimmy: still had time to scroll though Jimmy: Pete's got a bird I reckon 💔💔💔 Jimmy: so mad 'bout it Janis: 😱😱😱 Janis: Why are you trying to hurt me so bad Jimmy: 'cause I feel it too, babe Janis: I feel like all my dreams are dead Janis: crying on this bus Jimmy: tweet that at him Jimmy: he can use it for a lyric Janis: 😂😂😂 Janis: hi, we've not properly met but 💔 Jimmy: he'd love it Janis: Enough to chuck the gf orrr Janis: I ain't bothering otherwise Jimmy: #duh Jimmy: 🥇 Janis: Awh, thanks babes 😘 Jimmy: 😘 Jimmy: love you 💕 Janis: love you too 💕 Janis: such a good friend Jimmy: back in the #friendzone Jimmy: I get it, you've seen an in with your true love, get on it Jimmy: 👍 Janis: #wheresthejealousy? Jimmy: challenge accepted Janis: 😍 Jimmy: who am I fighting though? Pete ain't in Janis: Take it out on me for now Jimmy: 😍😍😍 Janis: Not saying you gotta remind me who's name to say but you know Janis: can't hurt, babe Jimmy: like I said, stay in your lane Jimmy: that's my shout Janis: 😂 Janis: Good thing you're #unforgettable Jimmy: are you hungry 'cause I am Janis: oh baby 🤤 Janis: but nah Janis: could eat Jimmy: nah you have to really want it Jimmy: the food here ain't worth a maybe Jimmy: starving or don't bother Janis: watch you eat then Janis: #creeper Jimmy: sexy Janis: Believe it Janis: watch you sleep later Jimmy: this is why you're last of the great romantics, love Janis: you're so 🍀 Jimmy: hang on, let me tweet it Jimmy: let the fans know Janis: gotta make the most of the ban lift Jimmy: that better not be a challenge, girl Janis: such a slag Jimmy: 💔💔💔 Janis: Jus' sayin' Janis: save a lil something just for me, yeah? 💔 Jimmy: there's the jealousy Jimmy: we found it Jimmy: 💕 Jimmy: it's all for you, girl Janis: Shut up 😏 Jimmy: you on your way to make me? Jimmy: 'cause til then nah Janis: Such a talker Janis: never take a break, you Jimmy: you love it though Janis: You reckon? Jimmy: yeah Jimmy: all 'bout the noises you Janis: 😳 Janis: Don't be chatting that when you ain't here to back it up Jimmy: I will when you get here Jimmy: so come on Janis: can't blame me for being slow Janis: I ain't running and I ain't the driver so Jimmy: 🎻🎻🎻 Jimmy: tell whoever is to get a move on Jimmy: #medicalemergency Janis: Sadly not our bus driver bestie Janis: he'd understand Janis: be gutted it's me not you but you know Jimmy: he liked you too Jimmy: I'm just 🥇 after the latest ride Janis: thanks for the pep talk, babe Janis: so supportive Jimmy: I know Jimmy: & always ready with a challenge Janis: I reckon I know what you're thinking Jimmy: ? Jimmy: go on Janis: Doesn't take a genius to work out you want me to go for your title 🥇 Janis: yeah? Jimmy: save it for when our #1 fan is there though Jimmy: 👌 Janis: You're actually in love with him Janis: 💔 Jimmy: he's a bit young for me Jimmy: but a decent Barry rebound I reckon Janis: Giving blowies for lifts, told ya Janis: with how cheap bus is, bit shaming but okay, have a nice life Jimmy: cheap for you, rich girl Jimmy: you gonna throw money 'round on this date, show this lad up? Janis: 😏😂 Janis: I don't know if I'm allowed to Janis: gonna need her to clarify what her actual plan here is Jimmy: piss off Jimmy: you do what she tells you now? Janis: 🙄 Janis: Obviously not Jimmy: you wanna re-write that sentence then? Janis: If the goal is to piss off Mia, idk if that'll help us achieve said goal Janis: there Janis: pedantic Jimmy: 🙄 Janis: Gonna be that couple are we Janis: having a row and making the other people wanna die Jimmy: Are we? Janis: keep 🙄 and we'll see Jimmy: keep telling me what to do & we'll see Jimmy: 👍 Janis: not 😍 for that Janis: noted Jimmy: unless it's like shhh go to sleep Jimmy: or summat Janis: You don't need to be told sleepyhead Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: but nah I'm fighting it 💪🏆 Janis: sure you wanna go shopping and not snoozing? Jimmy: don't you wanna go? Janis: happy just to see you, darling Janis: seriously, whatever Jimmy: 💕 Jimmy: Cass' potential mood upswing depends on it so Jimmy: we gotta Janis: Oh duh, forgot already Janis: your fault for being distracting Janis: 👍 Jimmy: haven't even been on twitter Jimmy: sort yourself out, Jenna Janis: Fine Janis: ignoring you Jimmy: yeah? Jimmy: I'll get back to work then Janis: *is ignoring you shh* Jimmy: ☕☕🍪🥐☕ Jimmy: 👵💕 Janis: Such a pervert Jimmy: I'm so busy I can't reply soz Jimmy: 👴💋 Janis: Hate you so much Jimmy: I hate you too, babe Janis: 😏 you ain't even funny Jimmy: I am Jimmy: you're good at faking but not that good Janis: Fine, give you that Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: if that's all you're gonna gimme, guess I'll take it Janis: Let your old biddy customers tell you how handsome you are Jimmy: they are Jimmy: can barely hear my phone going Janis: must be being polite today too Janis: working for those tips Jimmy: they're polite so I don't have to be Jimmy: #blessed Janis: dickhead Jimmy: & you love it Janis: nice to know you're not a total arselick, yeah Janis: couldn't even fake date that Jimmy: tah for letting me know Jimmy: I'll pass on to my manager that he's out of the running Janis: I assume he's the chubby guy, mid 30s Janis: who I've literally seen once Jimmy: yeah, that's the one Janis: Thought so Janis: was already out of the running Jimmy: 🎻🎻💔💔🎻🎻 Jimmy: gutted mate Jimmy: he'll be crying in the back when he realises Janis: Shoulda thought've that before he shouted at my mans in front of customers Janis: poor Pete Jimmy: that's why he's really off Jimmy: can't bear to show his face like Janis: So mad Jimmy: he'll write a decent song 'bout it Jimmy: be alright Janis: gf will console him Janis: I'll make an anon complaint about the manager like the unsung hero I am Jimmy: coming up 🌹s Jimmy: top one, pete Jimmy: proud of him Janis: you can't be proud of him he's older than you Jimmy: how's that work? Janis: you're a child Janis: he's a manly man Janis: that's how that works Jimmy: piss off am I or is he Jimmy: sounds faker than you've ever Janis: 😂 Janis: deal with it, boy Jimmy: deal with me Jimmy: girl Jimmy: I'm a better man than any Jimmy: including your true love Janis: Hot Jimmy: it will be when I prove it Janis: I was joking but now I'm Jimmy: I'll show you I'm not Janis: Jim Jimmy: ? Janis: Just Janis: you're killing me here Jimmy: I'll make it better Jimmy: how far away are you? Janis: lowkey ages Janis: feels it Janis: still going 'round the houses here Jimmy: [sends her a fire sext like he did way back when] Jimmy: I reckon you should have something to read Jimmy: & think about Janis: I Janis: have you ever thought of doing that as a living Janis: you could Janis: way easier than slinging coffees probably Jimmy: maybe now I've got such a top muse Jimmy: you really inspire me Jimmy: [sends another one 'cause extra] Janis: Actually dead Janis: I did warn you Janis: Fuck Jimmy: 💔💔💔💔 Jimmy: it backfired, I was trying to keep you going til I can do everything I wrote down Jimmy: 😭😭😭 Janis: Everything, yeah? Jimmy: that was the plan but it's too late now Jimmy: gotta call Barry & see if he'll be my date to the funeral Jimmy: look so good in black he'll have to say yeah Janis: You're so mean Janis: don't talk about him right now Jimmy: what do you wanna talk about? Janis: You Janis: and me Jimmy: go on Janis: It's stupid how much I miss you when you ain't around Janis: touching you and kissing you Janis: all of it Jimmy: I get it Jimmy: I want you so much Jimmy: all the time Jimmy: I don't feel stupid Jimmy: I feel Janis: I feel it too Janis: I don't know why Jimmy: 'cause it's good Jimmy: you're Janis: yeah? Jimmy: you make me feel really good, you know Janis: good Janis: that's what i wanna do Jimmy: anything else? Janis: i mean Janis: lots of things can fall under what makes you feel good so Janis: not really Jimmy: chat to me 'bout them Jimmy: drown out these customers for me Jimmy was timed out 30 hours ago Jimmy joined the chat 26 hours ago Janis: All I can think about is how badly I wanna be alone with you in a changing room right now Jimmy: I'm thinking of places we can be alone here too, don't worry Jimmy: resourceful like that Janis: Man of many talents Jimmy: there's more privacy in this place than you'd think Jimmy: especially when your man Pete the only other smoker ain't here Janis: Why you been holding out on me Jimmy: blame your boyfriend, he's always on shift Jimmy: & I only just found out the disabled toilet gets so little use it's used as a cleaning supply cupboard Jimmy: must have better taste in coffee Janis: I intend to, add it to my list of grievances with him Janis: Clearly Janis: interesting Jimmy: you're gonna be over the character limit on these tweets, babe Jimmy: get typing Jimmy: the customer toilets are well nicer than ours, write an anon complaint 'bout that tah Janis: Got a lot to say Janis: you gonna let be vent to you? Jimmy: like I'm always saying, so chatty you Jimmy: but I've also said you can say what you want, loads of times so Jimmy: keep up, Jill Janis: You've also called me a horny mute enough times to give a bitch a complex so Janis: challenging that Jimmy: 🎻🎻🎻 poor lass Jimmy: challenge accepted, if you're frustrated enough to need to vent, take 'em out on me Janis: 💔💔💔 so mean Janis: it is your fault, like Jimmy: it is Jimmy: so go on Jimmy: use your boyfriend Janis: Jesus Janis: I Jimmy: it's alright Jimmy: I want you to Janis: How are you so Janis: it's rude Jimmy: I've missed you Jimmy: is the answer Janis: I wish you didn't have to work all the time Janis: but it's good that you do or you'd be sick of the sight of me if I could see you as much as I want Jimmy: nah I wouldn't Jimmy: you're 🥇 remember Janis: You're gonna fuck me at School, yeah? Janis: I can't handle being around you all day and not at least kissing you Jimmy: if we have to be there then I have to Jimmy: challenge accepted, yeah? Jimmy: we'll find somewhere Janis: Loads of the lads chat like they have, probably bullshit for the most part but gotta be doable Jimmy: #goals Jimmy: I told you before, I'll get in trouble for you Jimmy: I don't care Janis: I really like you Janis: you're fun Jimmy: you Jimmy: but I won't spread it 'bout & ruin your 💪 rep Janis: Cheers 👍 Janis: my rep is so important, obvs Janis: so many friends and fans, so little time Jimmy: #duh Jimmy: just make time for me & it's alright Janis: you're the only one I want Jimmy: make me believe it when you get here Janis: you're gonna have no choice but to Janis: trust Jimmy: such a romantic Janis: don't take the piss, boy Janis: #medicalemergency remember Jimmy: I'm not Jimmy: I already told you, you make me feel so good Jimmy: it's that's not #romance I don't want it Janis: Good Janis: don't be dumping me for some lovey-dovey bitch yet Jimmy: piss off Jimmy: too many grandmas to choose from Jimmy: I need time Janis: take your time Janis: as much as you need Janis: then some Jimmy: 👌 Jimmy: wish you weren't right now Jimmy: REALLY need that break Janis: we're 5 minutes now Janis: unless any more of your faves decide to chat on their way off Jimmy: unless they wanna fall out with me Jimmy: better not Janis: 😂 let it be known Janis: oi sandra, better get a wriggle on Jimmy: Doris, leave it out Jimmy: put 'em all on blast Janis: must really like me 😏 Jimmy: yeah Jimmy: must do Janis: 'cos you know I ain't gonna tip you as good Janis: how the rich stay rich Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: oh rich girl! 💔 bit rude but I can't say I'm surprised Jimmy: there's the real tip Jimmy: spend wisely Jimmy: you gonna need all your wealth to flex on this double date Janis: Obviously Janis: can't have him 💪 all over us Janis: clearly insufferable enough without that Jimmy: you gonna meet me 'round the back then? since you're slumming Jimmy: or you wanna flex on some 👵👴 too first? Janis: You know I gotta 👀 the competition Jimmy: doesn't exist, baby Jimmy: so just check me out & let's go Janis: that's right, tell me what I wanna hear Jimmy: I'd rather give you what you need but if you're 5 minutes away I guess we can talk a bit Janis: I know, such a hardship for me too Jimmy: 🎻🎻🎻 Jimmy: take that out on Doris & Bill 🥊 Janis: No, you Janis: I'm not the one who acts inappropriate with oldies Jimmy: only got your word for that Janis: 😑 Jimmy: hang on Jimmy: [more time passes than is usual] Janis: I'm getting off the bus Janis: you alright? Jimmy: rare appearance from your spurned love interest Jimmy: gonna make this more fun Janis: Which one? Jimmy: what did you call him, a chubby 30 year old? Jimmy: time to put on a show, girl Jimmy: let's see how 'down with the kids' he really wants to be Janis: I believe I was generous and gave him mid-30s Janis: which is when we find out he's 26 and the receding hairline is genetic, thanks Janis: chose a time to give a shit 🙄 but down for the challenge, obviously 🥇 Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: tell me what I wanna hear, babe Jimmy: NEED to hear, like Janis: I'm outside Jimmy: come in then Jimmy: say hello Janis: No more talking, yeah Jimmy: I'm not refusing you Jimmy: not when you chat like that Jimmy: come inside Janis: Coming Jimmy: [really extra kiss as a hello obviously but not sorry everyone cos its hot af] Janis: Well Janis: he's not looking yeah Janis: you go first Jimmy: alright Jimmy: one sec Janis: Try and be less obvious, babe Jimmy: me? you Janis: I don't know what you're talking about Jimmy: hang on, I'll show you Jimmy: exactly what you did Janis: You can't Janis: show me anymore here Jimmy: [does 'cause challenge accepted this is why you're gonna get in trouble lad] Janis: Come on, Jimmy Janis: you need a smoke, yeah Janis: really bad Jimmy: desperately Jimmy: how did you know? Janis: Me too Janis: amongst other things Jimmy: [lights her 🚬 up but in a really sexy way thank you cos SEXUAL TENSION BITCH gotta make 'em wait longer cos I'm rude] Jimmy: alright? Janis: yeah Janis: well Janis: no but Jimmy: ? Janis: You know what Janis: don't play innocent Jimmy: don't you Jimmy: come here Jimmy: get what you want Janis: [Does] Jimmy: fuck Jimmy: you take direction really well Jimmy: I thought it was only when you were faking Janis: Only when it's what I want Janis: but sure, we can pretend it was your idea, babe Jimmy: I don't want to pretend Jimmy: not right now Janis: Then get what you do want Jimmy: [does & it's everything he said he was gonna do in those hot sexts so damn] Janis: [After when she's got kicked out and he's getting fired, is ignoring] Jimmy: 🙄🙄🙄 Janis: what happened Jimmy: he's #overit Jimmy: & sacking me Jimmy: now Janis: what Janis: nah Jimmy: put your ear to the door Jimmy: not gonna get a glowing reference when I show up to work for the competition Jimmy: bit rude Janis: obviously I've gone Janis: can you not like beg for another chance Jimmy: why? Jimmy: not my fucking dad, am I? Janis: Alright but Janis: it didn't need to happen, it was stupid Janis: I won't come in again, feel free to throw this all out Jimmy: neither will I Jimmy: hanging up my apron Jimmy: 🎻🎻🎻 Janis: I'm sorry Jimmy: for what? Jimmy: only Pete's gonna be 💔💔💔 Janis: for getting you sacked, obviously Jimmy: you didn't Jimmy: I did everything he saw Jimmy: & we can use this Jimmy: not quite romeo & juliet levels but the fans will still be 'bout it Janis: Be serious Jimmy: I am Jimmy: think of a good # Janis: Think of how you're gonna deal with your Dad Jimmy: fuck him Jimmy: school starts soon anyway Jimmy: I'll take less shifts at the next place Jimmy: & we sorted Cass' problem without having to buy her owt 👍 Janis: That's something Jimmy: it's decent so don't worry Jimmy: my dad'll lose his rag, gimme a smack, I'll do it better & that's that job done too Janis: you don't have to pretend it ain't a problem Janis: one you could do without Jimmy: it ain't yours Jimmy: you don't have to take it on Jimmy: 🤞 we give each other enough bruises to call off family dinner Jimmy: get out of that too Janis: it's fucked Jimmy: just make it look good for the audience Jimmy: I love you so much I risked it all Jimmy: that sorta bollocks Jimmy: 👌 Janis: Sure Jimmy: I'll handle my dad's tantrums Jimmy: not the 1st or last Janis: 👍 Jimmy: [later] Jimmy: come get the dog for me before he gets back? Janis: Okay Janis: am I bringing her back or starting a new life Jimmy: up to you that Jimmy: I'm just hoping if you show up Cass'll forget about wanting front row & go with Jimmy: little lad's a given Janis: right Janis: do my best to be convincing Jimmy: 🥇 Jimmy: get pics to show how much you love me for getting the sack for you Jimmy: 👍 Janis: 🙄 Janis: You're ridiculous Jimmy: why? Jimmy: what you wanna do fucking mope? Jimmy: get it together & do your bit Janis: piss off Jimmy: I literally just told you I don't care if I get in trouble for you Jimmy: so what's your issue? Janis: I care, dickhead Jimmy: then like I said, do your bit Jimmy: don't make it weird Janis: I am and I ain't Janis: God Jimmy: 🙄 Janis: 🖕 Jimmy: calm down Jimmy: & say summat Janis: What do you want me to say Janis: I already did and you ain't listening Jimmy: I heard you, Jasmine Jimmy: but nowt matters Jimmy: it's just a job & it ain't mine now Janis: Fine Janis: shut up, I'm trying to put my shoes on Jimmy: you can't multitask any more? Jimmy: too 💔💔 'bout Pete Jimmy: you can go see him when you miss him, it's alright Janis: 😑 Janis: Jealous Janis: I didn't get sacked, I'm not changing my regular for you Jimmy: get him to make your smoothies Jimmy: let me know whose are better Jimmy: 👌 Janis: I'll try and remember Jimmy: calling his efforts forgettable before you've tasted 'em Jimmy: bit rude Janis: you would think that Janis: you would think that Janis: ego Jimmy: you said it Jimmy: poor lad Janis: I repeat Janis: 😑 Janis: you know I meant Imma be too busy now you're out the way Jimmy: you mean you're gonna be too busy with me Janis: you reckon Jimmy: yeah Jimmy: you said you didn't want me to work as much Jimmy: now I ain't Jimmy: nowt but time for you 💕 Janis: so I planned it, yeah Jimmy: should've Jimmy: but just a happy accident like my birth Jimmy: 👍 Janis: Idiot Jimmy: Miss you too Janis: No need now Janis: all that free time Jimmy: see, it's good news Janis: you ain't seen your Dad yet so Jimmy: I know how that's playing out Janis: he's literally going to kill me Jimmy: piss off Jimmy: I'd never let him Janis: even if you lie why it happened, he's gonna know Janis: or go down there and ask, even worse Jimmy: I'll say it was my other girlfriend Janis: maybe Janis: father son bonding moment Jimmy: shame you don't look more like twins I could drop Grace in it Jimmy: the manager has only seen you like twice though Jimmy: maybe Janis: Twice is enough Janis: gotta have seen her more and it's an insult to reckon even in passing you're making that mistake Jimmy: 😂 Janis: 😒 Jimmy: I can feel you making that face for real Jimmy: be nice to me Janis: Me? Janis: You be nice to me Jimmy: I am Jimmy: gonna protect you from my dickhead dad 💪 Janis: Shouldn't have to Jimmy: we saying this is all my fault now Jimmy: is that the story? Janis: No Janis: you don't listen Janis: it's mine, idiot Jimmy: you don't listen Jimmy: I told you, it's not Jimmy: stop being a dickhead Janis: Oh my God Janis: am I coming over right now or what Janis: yeah, I am Jimmy: It don't make you less of a diickhead Jimmy: you're still chatting shit Jimmy: stop Janis: Charming Jimmy: it's why you like me Janis: Mhmm Janis: not 'cos I'm fucked in the head or nothing Jimmy: piss off Janis: nah Jimmy: for fuck's sake Jimmy: just come over Janis: I am Jimmy: don't have to bring your 😍 but gutted 'bout the lack of enthusiasm Janis: What YOU chatting Janis: always 😍 to see Twix Jimmy: 'course Jimmy: she feels it Janis: I know Janis: chat all the time Jimmy: 💕 Jimmy: she'll be so 💔 I can walk her now Janis: Guard your shoes Janis: heads up Jimmy: tah Jimmy: can't afford to buy more 'cause of 🐶💔 Janis: don't Janis: feel bad enough, fuck's sake Jimmy: you Jimmy: I can't keep telling you it's not your fault Janis: then don't Janis: but literally would not have happened if I weren't there so Jimmy: I want you more than I want that shitty job, alright? Jimmy: so stop Janis: alright Janis: you can get another one easy Janis: yeah Jimmy: you've tasted my smoothies, you tell me Janis: that sounds weirdly filthy 😂 Jimmy: not an answer though Jimmy: I get it, you were faking liking 'em Jimmy: 💔 Janis: shh Janis: you know you're good Jimmy: I know it's hot when you say it Janis: really? you've not been deterred by manager simon or whatever the fuck literally staring open-mouthed like Jimmy: no Jimmy: & if that's your way of dumping me, bit rude Jimmy: coulda done it before he sacked me Janis: told you Janis: all part of my plan to get pete alone Janis: and single-handedly bring CG down, naturally Jimmy: should just go to one of his gigs Jimmy: you know there ain't nobody there but the band Janis: so bitter Janis: art about it, babe Jimmy: I will Jimmy: tah Janis: #muse 'til the end Janis: welcome Jimmy: really gonna miss you when you're Pete's groupie Jimmy: 🎻🎻🎻 Janis: I prefer band wife Janis: but gotta start somewhere Janis: it's been real Jimmy: Barry come back Jimmy: the coast's clear & all is forgiven Janis: 😏 Janis: just don't let him impregnate you Jimmy: yeah one baby is enough Jimmy: really should've grabbed it from the CG before I left Janis: put a hat and apron on it it's your replacement sorted Jimmy: taught her everything she knows Jimmy: you're welcome Janis: a girl is it Jimmy: Barry only wants daughters he can warn blokes off of, he's that kinda dad Janis: creepy Janis: you 💕 him Jimmy: he's a decent rebound Jimmy: had the practice Janis: accidental or intentional shade Janis: either way fuck you Jimmy: what are you on about? Janis: calling my inexperienced Jimmy: nah Jimmy: calling him very experienced at being dumped and picking up dumpees Janis: Hmm Janis: ok Jimmy: & you aren't inexperienced anymore Jimmy: Pete will be 😍😍😍 Janis: no need to toot your own horn that hard either Janis: 🙄 Jimmy: do it for me then Janis: Pervert Janis: after that glowing review you ain't getting from CG, yeah Jimmy: 💔💔💔 Janis: Idiot Jimmy: is that your word of the day? Jimmy: really getting full use Janis: if you wanna stop being one Janis: lemme know Jimmy: any time you wanna shut up, go on Janis: 🖕 Jimmy: 👌 Jimmy: in a bit Janis: [bit] Janis: here Janis: bring out the dog/relevant kids Jimmy: [does] Jimmy: 👍 Janis: idk Janis: hope it's not the worst it could be Jimmy: tah Jimmy: don't forget the pics, yeah Janis: I won't Jimmy: alright Janis: call me if you need Jimmy: dramatic Jimmy: call me if YOU need Jimmy: the kids are on one Janis: how is that dramatic Jimmy: I already said, I can handle my dad's tantrums Janis: well excuse me for caring Jimmy: just don't bring 'em back til I let you know Jimmy: if you care so much Janis: I won't Janis: I'm not stupid Jimmy: just me Jimmy: I got that Janis: No Jimmy: what? Janis: You aren't, alright Jimmy: bollocks Jimmy: you've been calling me an idiot non stop Janis: because I feel like one Janis: don't act like that doesn't make sense Jimmy: it makes sense that you're a dickhead Jimmy: come inside for a sec Janis: Yeah? Jimmy: yeah Jimmy: just gimme one second Jimmy: & then you can go Janis: give me two Jimmy: alright Janis: [has to kiss him first do doesn't say it] Jimmy: [kisses her back really hard 'cause same & holds her 'cause comfort needed bitch] Janis: [Hugs for longer than should like bitch leave] Jimmy: you gotta go Jimmy: I can hear Twix losing it outside Janis: Yeah Janis: I know Janis: [kisses some more then leaves fr] Jimmy: [later] Jimmy: alright? Janis: yeah Janis: you? Jimmy: I just need to leave then you can bring 'em back Janis: okay Janis: go to mine? Jimmy: who's there? Janis: Us, currently but by the time you get there we won't Janis: wait for me in the barn Jimmy: okay Janis: do you need anything i can get on my way back Jimmy: just bring yourself Janis: okay Jimmy: Janis Janis: Yeah? Jimmy: nowt I just Jimmy: tah for looking after 'em Janis: 'course Janis: no problem Jimmy: I don't have to give Cass a smack too, do I? Janis: Nah Janis: she was chatting to me when Bobby couldn't hear but she weren't letting on to him so Jimmy: I've text her so she knows Dad ain't murdered me Jimmy: not that there's a rug or owt missing, just me Janis: 👍 Janis: good Janis: gutted not to go true crime detective on it but Jimmy: you'd solve it too fast for it to be a laugh anyway Jimmy: too many clues Janis: true Janis: bit embarrassing, really Jimmy: can you get 🚬 actually? this pack is so light Jimmy: & get the kids 🍬 to soften the blow of not having my company for a bit Janis: my bad Janis: done and done Janis: not getting your Dad nothing Jimmy: he'll be 💔 Jimmy: needs a 🤕 Janis: nope Janis: stick a plaster on it and good luck Jimmy: brutal you Janis: He started it Jimmy: nah, I did Jimmy: losing me job Janis: so? not an excuse Janis: not like he's gotta retrain someone is it Jimmy: he don't need one Jimmy: any will do Janis: hate him Jimmy: #same Jimmy: not a couple brag for them 'gram but decent we've got that much in common Janis: obviously, soz Janis: your da, you actually have to deal with him Jimmy: I try not to Jimmy: got enough on Jimmy: don't let yours see me, yeah Janis: I won't Janis: promise Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: I promise not to get blood on you Jimmy: maybe Janis: Jimmy Janis: how bad is it then Jimmy: nowt serious Jimmy: it's happened before so it does the next time, like Janis: I'll fix it Jimmy: I know Jimmy: feel better already me Janis: you will Janis: you know you can stay as long as you need to Jimmy: just not as long as I want Jimmy: Cass'd be fuming Janis: and you'd miss 'em Janis: come on Jimmy: let's move 'em in Jimmy: what could be more #goals Jimmy: living with a 6 year old going on toddler & 12 year old going on 22 Janis: Obviously Janis: save the teen pregnancy which has frankly been overdone in this fam so Janis: plenty of empty rooms if you can stand the cunts Jimmy: shame you can't bring Twix though that'd be helpful Janis: I know Janis: poor bitch Jimmy: anyone you know that doesn't have cats by the million? Janis: 'course Janis: my grandparents would take her Janis: can sort anything I can Jimmy: I wish you could Jimmy: for real Jimmy: It's all Jimmy: such bollocks Janis: Yeah Janis: I know Jimmy: I don't want 'em to see me but I don't wanna just leave 'em with him Jimmy: ever Jimmy: that's not Janis: It's Janis: total catch 22 Janis: he wouldn't do anything like that to them though, yeah? Janis: not saying he's winning dad of the year in the meantime but Jimmy: but Cass is gonna be mad enough to say anything Jimmy: & Bobby's gonna be so scared Jimmy: when are they not Janis: what can we do, seriously Janis: is it gonna be worse if you go home with them Janis: like assumedly Jimmy: I don't know Jimmy: I just can't go back there right now Janis: You don't have to Janis: ask Cass to be extra nice to Bobby Janis: keep it together 'til you can go back Jimmy: yeah Jimmy: it's not fucking fair on her though Jimmy: nowt of it Jimmy: some hol this has been Janis: it ain't on you either Janis: that's on him though Janis: it can't even begin to be fair 'til he sorts his shit so Janis: she's old enough to know that Jimmy: I'm not 12 Jimmy: & it weren't like this for me when I was Jimmy: bad but not Janis: Shit's changed and that's out of your control Janis: the more you 'front like it ain't the more you put yourself in the firing line when it's meant to be him Jimmy: it's changed them so much & I Jimmy: someone's gotta take the hit for that Jimmy: he won't Janis: I get it Janis: like, not making it about me but I seriously do Janis: but they won't thank you for it, they'd rather you were at least a little bit fucking alright, you know Janis: they need you like that Jimmy: I'll be alright Jimmy: you're coming to fix me up Janis: Yeah Janis: we will work it out Jimmy: It's good that I met you Jimmy: best thing about being here Jimmy: only decent one maybe Janis: Competition ain't tough but Janis: I'll take it Jimmy: the free medical attention coming my way has really elevated this whole girlfriend thing up one Jimmy: full shade to my ex for not coming through when she had her time Janis: Just don't start getting beat up for the attention, yeah Jimmy: with this face? Jimmy: it's my money maker, the rest of living ain't free, sweetheart Jimmy: good thing I don't have to work tomorrow, not looking pretty right now, sorry ladies Janis: You're so Janis: #sorrydorisyoumean Janis: better tell her you've moved so she can follow so you know it's real Jimmy: Pete's gonna have a 9-5 cleaning tables when the mass exodus happens Jimmy: sorry mate Jimmy: give him loads of time to work on his songs though Janis: all the 💔 will help him Janis: make him miss you even more but that's life, baby Jimmy: do you reckon Grace & her mates will believe I'm just on a really long break out back? Janis: 😂 Janis: would if you hadn't been dramatic on the 'gram Janis: their real hunting ground Jimmy: speak of 😈 Mia just liked it Janis: she's so bloody creepy Jimmy: did you see her latest selfie 💀 Jimmy: [sends it] Janis: 🦆 Jimmy: sorta impressive that your sister can find bollocks to comment Jimmy: that isn't like Jimmy: you look like death Janis: #tooreal for any of them Janis: especially Gracie Jimmy: at least her last selfie was alright Jimmy: I could chat shit on that if I had to Janis: go marry her then Jimmy: told you, you don't look alike enough Jimmy: can't be showing up like oops wrong one Janis: 😂 Janis: she would lock me in a cupboard she's got no shame Jimmy: insight into your childhood there? Jimmy: Harry Potter got nowt on you Janis: Yeah right Janis: too early for that shit Jimmy: it don't feel early to me Jimmy: this has been the longest fucking day Janis: You wanna hear my sad childhood stories then Janis: cheer you right up Jimmy: I'm out 🚬 Jimmy: gotta do summat Janis: Mysterious Jimmy: is it? Janis: What are you doing? Jimmy: walking Jimmy: 'cause you live in the middle of nowhere for some reason Janis: tell me about it Jimmy: have you dropped 'em off yet? Janis: in shop, picking their sweets Jimmy: soz Jimmy: you'll be ages Jimmy: it'll feel like a long day by then Janis: yeah Janis: realising Jimmy: I'll make it up to you Janis: you can't Janis: you're a patient Jimmy: I'm bleeding but not to death Jimmy: plenty I can still do 💪 Janis: Shh, save your strength Janis: hard for me too, I know you're gonna look even hotter and it's just Jimmy: fuck your childhood stories, I'm learning shit here Janis: 😳 shut up that's a thing Jimmy: I'll shut up if you keep talking Jimmy: tell me again how hot I am Janis: you know you are Janis: you need me to tell you Jimmy: yeah Janis: I think you're probably the best-looking person I've ever seen in person Janis: people don't just look like that Jimmy: that's bollocks 'cause you look Jimmy: You're just Jimmy: beautiful, alright Janis: it ain't though Janis: I could look at you forever Jimmy: do it then Jimmy: I don't mind Janis: I'll start when you get here Jimmy: you're gonna look at me 😒 when I tell you Janis: tell me what Jimmy: I think I took a wrong turn Jimmy: I don't know where the fuck I am Janis: oh babe Janis: I'll find you Janis: now going yours, finally Jimmy: 🍀 all looks the same Janis: Gonna have to track you Janis: be THAT girl just 'cos you're a liability Jimmy: we can say that's the reason, yeah Janis: Please Janis: if I want you I don't even need to whistle Jimmy: if you want me to piss off you don't have to unclip my lead either Jimmy: just say Janis: I don't Janis: but you can, if you want Jimmy: why would I be lost in the general direction of your house if I wanted that Janis: Just saying Janis: you don't owe me nothing Jimmy: shut up Janis: I just Janis: I don't know Jimmy: I just need you right now Jimmy: so Janis: you've got me then Jimmy: I want you too, you know Jimmy: It ain't just that I got nowhere to go Jimmy: I'd break into the CG before going somewhere I don't want Janis: You don't have to say it Janis: I was just being stupid Jimmy: You aren't Jimmy: & I want to Jimmy: just listen to me Janis: I am Jimmy: yeah we say that Janis: Tell me Janis: whatever you wanna Jimmy: I've never said owt I don't want Janis: Okay Janis: I believe you Janis: sometimes I forget what was fake and what's real Janis: it's all Janis: muddled in my head Jimmy: ask me Jimmy: whenever you wanna Janis: alright Janis: how come you're so sure though Jimmy: you saying I chat shit? bit rude Janis: No I mean Janis: how do you know what I mean and don't Jimmy: I don't Jimmy: this could all be bollocks Janis: that don't bother you then Jimmy: you can't fake everything Jimmy: when you're with me I know how you feel Janis: Good Janis: I'm not trying to hide it Jimmy: it's alright Jimmy: everyone hides shit Jimmy: & chats it Janis: not you though, yeah? Jimmy: not to you Jimmy: there's loads of shit I haven't said but I'm not lying Jimmy: just not going that far back Janis: that's fine by me Janis: 'cos same Jimmy: don't worry then Jimmy: you know me better than anyone else Jimmy: 🥇 Janis: here anyway Janis: I'll take it Jimmy: I'm not going back so it counts Janis: oh right Janis: 👌 gotcha Janis: my fam would probably like to disagree but no one knows me either so Jimmy: sound more 💔 that you can't get rid of me, girl Jimmy: you should be happy, bit rude Janis: shh Janis: i'm glad i met you too Janis: it's just shit 'cos you don't wanna be here Janis: can't be selfish about it and buzzin', like Jimmy: I don't wanna be there either, not really Jimmy: I don't wanna be Jimmy: any of it Janis: yeah Jimmy: how do your parents get to decide for you how shit your life's gonna be & that's just Jimmy: how it is Janis: they just do Janis: must be in the fineprint for getting to be alive Janis: not arsed, too arsed, whatever, fucks you regardless Jimmy: I'm never having kids Jimmy: good thing I left that one in the CG Janis: same Janis: 'cos what kind of psycho wants the guilt, inversely Janis: like yeah, here's this kid I'm programmed to love no matter what and ahtever the fuck I do, they're gonna turn out fucked or hate me or Janis: nah Jimmy: guilt's good for my 🎨 but I'll be dried up by then Janis: so past it Janis: midlife crisis baby Janis: least women can't do that Jimmy: I feel like a dad of two already Jimmy: who fucking asked me Jimmy: & there's the dog Jimmy: 🙄 Janis: Start paying the mortgage and you're fully a single parent Jimmy: with this CV? Jimmy: bollocks to it Janis: 🎻🎻 Janis: thank fuck no one needs me Jimmy: let's just go out Jimmy: do summat other people in our year do Janis: cool Janis: puke on me and you're dead, idc how hot you are or how bad your injuries already might be Jimmy: you're the pisshead Jimmy: I can handle myself Janis: fuck off Janis: you chat shit on that, that's your thing Jimmy: what? Janis: You always say I'm drunk Janis: when I ain't Jimmy: I say it when you are Janis: 🙄😒 Janis: agree to disagree Jimmy: I like you when you're drunk Jimmy: & you're a cheap date so 👍 Janis: 😬 Janis: wanna be more creepy Jimmy: piss off you know what I mean Jimmy: you're less of a dickhead Jimmy: it's fun Jimmy: you like me more when you're drunk Janis: do I? Janis: better go get drunk then Jimmy: you have to wait for me or it ain't #goals Jimmy: & my injuries aren't gonna fix themselves yet Janis: you just hoping i got a uniform Jimmy: now I am Jimmy: but no clothes is also fine Jimmy: I'm easy-going like that Janis: good to know Janis: 'cos this is nhs service and you'll get what you're given and be thankful, boy Jimmy: I'll be very thankful Jimmy: you'll see Janis: don't be so Janis: we're meant to be going out Jimmy: we can be #fashionably late Janis: it's selfish but i want you so bad right now Jimmy: no complaints if that's what you're being selfish about Jimmy: actually is a #medicalemergency this time Jimmy: You need to make me feel better Janis: I'm going to forreal Janis: then I'll make you forget about everything that ain't feeling good and me Jimmy: It'll be a challenge Jimmy: it hurts, for real Janis: I know Janis: what's the actual damage you haven't said Jimmy: keeping it a surprise now 'cause you're so into it Jimmy: be a turn on for you Janis: don't make me sound like a psycho Janis: I don't like that you're hurt Janis: ugh Jimmy: I'm not being serious, baby Janis: don't try and sweet talk me now it'll 100% work and I'll be fuming Jimmy: be nice to me Jimmy: I wanna be nice to you Janis: it's my turn, if we're keeping score Jimmy: we're not Jimmy: for tonight we're just Jimmy: doing whatever we want Janis: then let me Janis: you need to relax, seriously Jimmy: alright Jimmy: I'm agreeing 'cause I'm in pain not 'cause you're right Janis: 'course Janis: we can say that's the reason Jimmy: it's the reason Jimmy: don't be stealing my lines Janis: 😂 Janis: but they're so effective Janis: not annoying at all, yeah? Jimmy: THAT I do agree with Janis: Nerd Jimmy: bit rude Janis: it's easier than being as nice as I wanna Jimmy: nah Jimmy: I'll shut up & make it so easy for you Jimmy: go on Janis: I can't Jimmy: please Janis: oh Janis: that is nice Jimmy: I know Janis: fuck it, tell you when we're drunk Jimmy: you really can't tell me now? Jimmy: any of it Janis: I can tell you plenty you'd rather hear Jimmy: yeah? Janis: I'm gonna make you regret wanting to go out, that's how good it'll be Jimmy: we don't have to Jimmy: like I said, whatever we want Jimmy: if it's that good, I'll stay Janis: nah, we will Janis: plenty of ways to have a nice time Jimmy: alright, challenge accepted Jimmy: it'll gimme an excuse for why I'm covered in blood that's not my dad's a bellend Jimmy: #thecraic Janis: 😏 and you DON'T wanna encourage my psycho behaviour, sure Jimmy: do you wanna encourage me in cross dressing? 'cause unless you want me to wear your clothes I'm gonna look like a horror flick Janis: 🤔 Janis: no doubt it ain't really crossdressing with my wardrobe Janis: sad times, babes Jimmy: shut up Jimmy: you're a girl, how many times we talking 'bout this Janis: glad you can tell Jimmy: 🙄 Janis: jus' sayin' Janis: do me a solid and spread that around Jimmy: get on twitter with your nudes & save me the job Janis: not all as #cocky as you boy Jimmy: you've got every reason to be Jimmy: more Janis: it's different Jimmy: I get it Jimmy: not a serious suggestion Jimmy: not that much of an idiot Janis: you aren't shut up Janis: besides, not taking 🔥 nudes from the roadside for you or tiwtter am Janis: *I Jimmy: you could Jimmy: but don't get arrested Jimmy: can't use all my savings for bail Janis: exactly, too many #risks taken for one day Jimmy: or just the right amount Jimmy: so far Janis: shame Jimmy: that the manager caught us, I know Jimmy: I feel it Jimmy: the interruption was well rude Janis: yeah Janis: it was Janis: you were Jimmy: he could've let us finish if he was gonna sack me anyway Jimmy: but to be continued I suppose Janis: so spiteful Janis: what did i ever do to you simon Jimmy: you were so close Jimmy: he had to know that Jimmy: give us a minute, lad Janis: don't oversell it Jimmy: don't misremember it Janis: give me some credit Janis: 2 minutes, like Jimmy: I'd have given you loads more Jimmy: didn't wanna stop Janis: Babe Jimmy: ? Janis: you know Jimmy: say it anyway Janis: i'm so Janis: i just need to find you Jimmy: I need you to find me Jimmy: so go on Janis: I'm trying, what do you think I'm doing Jimmy: how do I know Jimmy: not tracking you Janis: 🙄 Janis: yes, i've decided to stop off for a quickie with pete first Janis: hold up Jimmy: distracted easy you Jimmy: also a heartbreaker Jimmy: 💔💔 Janis: who's fault is that? Jimmy: mine & Pete's Jimmy: letting you Janis: if you had any idea how little interest i have in anyone else right now Janis: sad, really Jimmy: I don't feel sad Jimmy: neither do you Janis: not right now Jimmy: what do I have to do to make it not ever? Janis: don't Janis: don't be falling for anyone else yet Janis: i'm not ready Jimmy: you think I have any interest in anyone else myself? Jimmy: I just want you Janis: that's what i'm saying, keep it like that for a while yeah Jimmy: it is like that Jimmy: where do you think your competition is coming from? Jimmy: 🥇 you Janis: shh Jimmy: I'm serious Jimmy: you're Jimmy: there's loads of reasons I really like you Jimmy: even if you did get me sacked Janis: bastard 😏 Jimmy: 💕 Jimmy: the flashbacks alone are worth it Janis: i wasn't even Janis: it was all you Jimmy: you were Jimmy: you always are Jimmy: you reckon I was taking the piss out of you for being inexperienced before but you've known what you were doing since I met you Jimmy: you're just Janis: It's not like I'd done nothing it's just Janis: learning what you like Janis: what makes you cum Jimmy: & you're a fast learner Janis: 🙄 Janis: i'm not gonna tell you you're a good teacher Jimmy: either that or I'm a slag Jimmy: easy to turn on & get off Jimmy: either way is fine Janis: don't tell me if it's that Janis: live in ignorance Jimmy: my ex would tell you it's not Janis: some girls are just lazy Janis: expect it to be Jimmy: I didn't make it very easy for her Jimmy: in her defense Jimmy: any of it Jimmy: not just Janis: don't need to say Jimmy: I know but Jimmy: I don't wanna fuck this up Jimmy: I'm not ready for that Janis: told you Janis: me either Jimmy: so don't let me Jimmy: I'm a dickhead but I really like you Jimmy: alright Janis: I know both of those things Janis: don't worry Jimmy: keep 'em in mind for a bit Janis: do my best Janis: you will be so distracting though Jimmy: not saying sorry Jimmy: where the fuck am I though? Jimmy: sorry 'bout that Janis: I am taking all possible missteps, find you eventually Jimmy: I have a headache but if you take that to mean that I don't want you to touch me when you do get to me, I'm dumping you Janis: please don't pass out seriously Janis: putting jokes of how dramatic you are aside 'cos I mean it Jimmy: I won't, I mean it, been here before Jimmy: physically but not geographically Janis: Baby Janis: can I kill him Janis: lil bit Jimmy: only if we do it together Jimmy: there's shit I wanna know from him first Janis: #couplegoals Janis: i get it Jimmy: it'll look worse than it is Jimmy: don't be weird about it Janis: I won't, I'm not inexperienced with blood thanks Jimmy: just Jimmy: I know you care Jimmy: but I'm alright Janis: I won't push it Janis: understood Jimmy: 👍 Janis: sorry Jimmy: why? Janis: for being weird Jimmy: name a day you weren't Jimmy: it's my top thing about you Janis: you must be weird too then Jimmy: do you think I am? Janis: well this feels like a trick question Jimmy: it's a yeah or nah one Janis: nah, such a normie, you Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: a deeper cut than the one on my face Janis: I like you, that's all that matters Jimmy: you gonna show me how much when you find me Janis: try and stop me Jimmy: I'd rather not Jimmy: you said you'd help me relax if I let you Janis: I meant it Janis: doesn't mean self-control isn't gonna be hard for me Janis: but you need gentle Jimmy: you know I hate self control Jimmy: especially yours Janis: take it up with my manager Jimmy: Twix'll be sleeping Jimmy: had a hard day Janis: you too Janis: gotta get you like 😴 Jimmy: what are you on about? It's been great Jimmy: just thinking about earlier at the CG makes me so Janis: so what Jimmy: come on Jimmy: you know Janis: so tell me Jimmy: you want me to tell you how turned on I am Jimmy: that I ache for you to come back & finish what we started Jimmy: & I can't breathe 'cause it feels like forever since you touched me Jimmy: but I can still feel it too Jimmy: every time I go there in my head Jimmy: I'm back in the moment & I just Janis: I think I Janis: holy shit Janis: I don't know what I think my head is Janis: you're all I can think about Janis: all the time Janis: and that's so much better than anything else I had to think on before because you're Jimmy: it's the same for me Jimmy: that blowjob you gave me, your first one, was my best one Jimmy: that shouldn't be a sentence I'm saying Jimmy: like you shouldn't be all I think about & want Janis: I can't be sorry Janis: I want to be your best everything Janis: I want you to want me Jimmy: then you've got what you want Janis: swear Jimmy: there's enough blood here for it Janis: good thing I do live middle of nowhere Janis: what would the neighbours say Jimmy: I saw some 🐮s and they were #shook Janis: #haters Jimmy: probably reckoned they were in the abattoir Jimmy: soz ladies Janis: usually the boys that Janis: only need the one Jimmy: 🤔 Jimmy: teaching me loads today Janis: return the favour Janis: said i'm not gonna say it but Jimmy: there's nowt I can teach you Jimmy: you're Jimmy: just take your row of medals & don't be too smug bout it Janis: okay then let me beat my own record Jimmy: any time Jimmy: anywhere Janis: I need to, I can't stop thinking about it Jimmy: tell me what's going on in your head Janis: I didn't think it'd feel that good, just giving but it was so Janis: I don't know why people complain I'd do that all day Janis: you looked so Jimmy: if you could see how you're making me look now Janis: I'm jealous of the 🐮s honestly Janis: you really are gorgeous and I felt so Jimmy: every time I reckon I can't want you more you chat things that prove me wrong Janis: I can't wait to see you Janis: not 'cos you're lost and bloody and defenseless and I'm a predator like that Jimmy: you kissed me like you were fucking off forever Jimmy: so I need to fix that Janis: well Janis: I planned to but I have the willpower and actual self-control of a fucking crackhead when it comes to you, apparently Jimmy: did you? Janis: bit ott not like gonna-jump-off-a-cliff forever but Janis: i felt really bad Janis: feel Janis: but you said it ain't my fault and i'm chosing to believe that Jimmy: fuck all of that but the last bit Jimmy: stay Jimmy: not wherever the fuck nowhere but Janis: with you Janis: i wanna Jimmy: then just do it Janis: okay Jimmy: you scared me, don't do that Janis: i didn't mean to Jimmy: you can take the dog but my dad would probably notice the others are missing eventually Jimmy: it's just a shit plan Janis: what about you Janis: can i take you Jimmy: where are we going? Janis: supposed to say it doesn't matter because i don't know Janis: anywhere Jimmy: I'd say it don't but I'd rather not come back here Jimmy: the cows are a bit Janis: bovine Jimmy: I don't know what the fuck that means Jimmy: but if it's weird not in the good way my girlfriend is, then yeah Janis: just means like a cow, tbh, like when someone's dead slow and unmoving, bit thick Janis: Mia 'cos she's puking up her brain cells at this point Jimmy: & that girl who follows her round the most Janis: big one? Jimmy: the other 💀 one Janis: ahh, yeah Janis: fucking herd Janis: gracie is just a stupid duckling that imprinted and thinks she's a cow whilst she's waddling after 'em like Janis: 🙄 Jimmy: Pete could write a #sick song 'bout that Jimmy: hit him up Janis: ha Jimmy: hang on Jimmy: got shit on my shoe, gotta get the first tweet in Jimmy: 🎻🎻🎻 Janis: good luck getting signal Janis: i reckon i know where you are, work on how you're gonna chat him up for tix so i can sit her front row for the drag of the century tah Jimmy: #willthemiseryeverrelent? Jimmy: 💔💔 Jimmy: maybe we should see a show for real Jimmy: could be a laugh Janis: Yeah Janis: why not Janis: just remember you promised Jimmy: work on our heckles Jimmy: just don't get too jealous of my 😍😍 when they ain't aimed at you Jimmy: what did I promise? Janis: exactly that motherfucker 😒 Janis: no indie bands for you if this is how you're gonna be Jimmy: threesome or nowt, I hear you Janis: with your taste? nowt Jimmy: you love Pete Jimmy: what you chatting Janis: He's the only exception, I've told you many times Janis: special 💕 Jimmy: & I've only got eyes for you & him Jimmy: Barry when I'm wasted Janis: mhmm Janis: likely story, slag Jimmy: keep wounding me Jimmy: near death Jimmy: can't go on Janis: go find a girl with quirky coloured hair to cry on Jimmy: these cows are gonna eat me when I hit the ground so unlikely Jimmy: but a boy can dream Janis: 🖕 they're herbivores, you dickhead Janis: how you like your women too, I'm sure Jimmy: give a shit what they eat Jimmy: cows or girls Jimmy: both are eyeing me all the time Jimmy: like they wanna make something happen Janis: genuinely hate you Janis: so much i'm not walking to the end of this lane, come here if you're not a loitering murderer i'm looking at rn Jimmy: 💕 Jimmy: there's the romantic I fell for Janis: yeah yeah Jimmy: baby, take a step for me Jimmy: go on Janis: don't baby me Janis: you said you'd be nice Janis: 😠 Jimmy: alright, Janis take a step for me Jimmy: please Janis: [Does, a tiny one] Jimmy: [walks the rest of the way up to her & kisses her 'cause well that's just how he do] Janis: [casually covered in his blood, hot, touches where the split is gently and licks her finger after] Janis: let's go clean you up Jimmy: just Jimmy: [has to kiss her again harder cos wouldn't we all] Janis: yeah Janis: now let me be good and fix this Jimmy: You already are Jimmy: let me have Jimmy: [more kisses cos where is the chill on any given day] Janis: I want more Janis: but I don't wanna hurt you Jimmy: you won't Janis: [is kissing his neck 'cos safer] Jimmy: [enjoy his reaction cows 'cos we know he's living for it] Janis: [so many little kisses] Janis: is it just there or are there any bruises I need to miss too Jimmy: I don't know Jimmy: which sounds like a line to make you find out but I don't Janis: I'll be careful then Janis: check you thoroughly later, obviously Jimmy: it's a blur now Jimmy: like it didn't happen but obviously Janis: Yeah Janis: you don't have to think about it right now, if you don't want Jimmy: & I feel like I've been walking to find you for half the day Janis: I promise it weren't that long Janis: middle of nowhere and lost though you are Jimmy: I'm just saying I don't know what's my dad & what's how unfit I am Janis: It's alright, can work it out together Janis: and go slow now I've ascertained you aren't bleeding out Jimmy: can we stay here for a bit Jimmy: not ages just Janis: if you've got over your moophobia Janis: 'course Jimmy: you'll protect me Janis: yes baby Jimmy: [kisses her again 'cause we all know that was multi-layered chat thank you] Janis: sit down though Janis: [puts her jacket down 'cos remember when yes you do it wasn't that long ago] Jimmy: [sits but pulls her into his lap 'cause obviously] Jimmy: alright Janis: am now Janis: you? Jimmy: am now Jimmy: [is just touching her hair so gently 'cause fave like soz for the state of his hands probably babe] Janis: [motions that he should lift his arms so she can take his top off him carefully 'cos already bloody and uses it to wipe away the blood that has dried around his eyes] Jimmy: [does & tries not to visibly wince cos hard & northern but actually a soft boy so] Janis: [gives him neck and shoulder massages when she's done, as she's putting his top back on Janis: there Janis: might not have got lost if you could see better Jimmy: I'll use that excuse, tah Janis: allow it Janis: and i ain't telling Jimmy: me either Jimmy: twitter don't need to know everything Jimmy: bit of blasphemy Janis: alright Janis: no God in your house, you've told me Jimmy: I'll let the world know what a good nurse you are though Janis: Not letting just anyone bleed on me, you know Jimmy: sorry Jimmy: genuinely Janis: don't be Jimmy: there's so much Jimmy: [touches her face where some is but like not in a way he technically needs to after a sec 'cos I just have to bye] Janis: just looks it, head injuries always do Janis: you don't need stitches or nowt, I wouldn't be sat here if you did Janis: even if it's Janis: nice Jimmy: if I did I woulda had 'em first time Jimmy: do I need to be worried you're like an expert on head injuries for some reason Janis: 🔪🐰 Janis: told ya Jimmy: [actually lols] Janis: you're fucking cute Janis: do that again yeah Jimmy: you don't get to call me cute sitting there looking like that Jimmy: you're Jimmy: being really cute Janis: [makes a dorky face which she means to be ugly but come on] Janis: what about now? Jimmy: [kisses her 'cause can't like he gonna say some extra shit if I don't] Janis: [touches his lips after] Janis: i'm glad you don't have a fat lip Janis: it'd be really hard not to kiss you Janis: i might die Jimmy: I still would Jimmy: that hero 💪 Janis: 💕 Jimmy: but next time I'll tell him Janis: aim lower, right Janis: [points finger gun at his heart] Jimmy: that's your shot not his Jimmy: so be careful Janis: [crosses self, does scout's honour etc] Jimmy: [does a lil lol cos she a cute nerd] Janis: that might be one of my favourite noises you make Jimmy: don't commit yet Janis: i didn't Janis: sensible, me Jimmy: how sensible? Jimmy: you gonna stop me if I Jimmy: [is touching her in some saucy manner excuse you sir] Janis: very sensible Janis: be an idiot to stop you when Jimmy: when? Janis: when I missed you so much Jimmy: [starts kissing her neck & moving down her whole body, moving clothes out of his way as best he can 'cause missed her too obvs] Jimmy: what about now? Janis: [casually gripping onto his t-shirt really hard 'cos doesn't wanna hurt him but damn] Janis: Jimmy Jimmy: it's alright Janis: I'm meant to be Jimmy: I said, it's alright Jimmy: [carries on 'cause he's that dickhead] Janis: oh fuck Janis: don't start this somewhere we can't finish it again Jimmy: the cows aren't gonna tell us to stop Janis: so you trust 'em now do you Jimmy: I trust you Jimmy: [kisses her on the mouth before we know what's gonna happen oh boy] Janis: just tell me if I hurt you, okay? Jimmy: I told you, you won't Jimmy: trust yourself Jimmy: [starts from the top 'cause there & back at it again at Krispy Kreme] Janis: [starts unbuttoning him 'cos impatient] Jimmy: [likewise with whatever she's wearing 'cause he didn't ask like a phone sex line for once so idk] Janis: I want you so bad you know Jimmy: I can feel it Jimmy: but still like that you told me Janis: feel it some more Jimmy: [does] Janis: Shit Janis: That's so Jimmy: yeah Jimmy: I Janis: Please don't stop Jimmy: not now I've started, you know that Janis: yeah but promise Janis: I like it when you promise Jimmy: on what? a cow Jimmy: but alright Jimmy: [says that he promises out loud] Janis: [kisses him 'cos back at it again with nothing but ily to say] Jimmy: [lowkey drops his phone & don't even notice 'cause hot] Janis: [Hit 'em with an after 'cos] Jimmy: is it weird that we always type instead of just talking? Janis: probably but Janis: not like we do it when we're alone Janis: and not in public Jimmy: we're alone now Jimmy: are you counting the cows? Janis: yeah, they're people too, they don't need to hear me going all out Jimmy: bit late for that Jimmy: they heard everything Janis: shh Janis: never happened Jimmy: I just Jimmy: it's not 'cause Jimmy: you Janis: what? Janis: are you concussed? Janis: look at me Jimmy: you don't type it 'cause you can't delete what you chat before it comes out your mouth, do you? Jimmy: that's not the reason Janis: does it matter Jimmy: depends what the answer is Janis: then I won't answer Jimmy: that is an answer Jimmy: I'm not stupid Janis: no it isn't Janis: you can't assume that it's in favour of your bias just 'cos Jimmy: if you don't wanna tell me it's 'cause you think the answer is one I don't wanna hear Jimmy: & I know what I don't wanna hear Jimmy: so Janis: I don't wanna answer 'cos you said it mattered so either way Jimmy: self control yeah Jimmy: just edit it a bit Jimmy: I get it Janis: what you being like this for Jimmy: is it real or not? Jimmy: that's why it matters Janis: why would I fake fuck you Janis: what would be the point of that Janis: fucking hell Jimmy: you wouldn't but Jimmy: anything else you say to me Jimmy: are you just hitting delete on whatever you wanna say Jimmy: I'm just asking Janis: are you Janis: 'cos you seem to be more ready for this conversation than I am Jimmy: I asked you, don't turn it round on me 'cause you don't wanna tell me I'm right Janis: You aren't right Janis: can we go now Jimmy: I suppose Janis: what's the point in asking if you don't believe me anyway Jimmy: I never said I don't Janis: didn't have to Jimmy: I didn't mean to Janis: whatever Janis: come on Jimmy: [stops her 'cause boy you gotta fix this excuse you] Jimmy: not like this Janis: you said you ain't got nowhere else to go and i said you don't owe me nothing Jimmy: I'd rather stay here if that's what you reckon me going with you is Jimmy: whatever I've said Janis: don't be dramatic just Jimmy: It's not Jimmy: I care about you, alright Jimmy: that's why I asked Jimmy: & 'cause I trust you & that's not nowt to me Jimmy: it's bigger than like any of the rest of the bollocks of knowing someone Janis: alright Janis: just 'cos I hold back some things doesn't mean I'm lying or whatever you think it means Janis: we're not going that far back, you said, not everything has to be said for the shit that is to matter, does it Jimmy: loads of people have kept loads of shit from me & if you're gonna be another one then I just wanna know first this time that you are Jimmy: but nah I don't need your life story Janis: Well what do you need Janis: 'cos if you're gonna hold it against me when I tell you something later you wanted to know now then Jimmy: I'm not trying to be that dickhead Jimmy: It's just Jimmy: he's never not in my head Jimmy: my dad Jimmy: & that fucks things up sometimes, I know Jimmy: but me, I don't want to Janis: I know Janis: however much I don't know about the whole situation there, I know that Janis: I'm not holding that against you, am I Jimmy: you can Jimmy: I hurt you, you can hurt me Janis: I don't want to Janis: and you didn't Jimmy: a bit Janis: just shut up yeah Jimmy: just let me say sorry first Jimmy: 'cause I am Jimmy: I'm sorry Janis: alright Jimmy: [kisses her 'cause he's shit with words & so that's a better sorry] Janis: it's just been a shit day, yeah Jimmy: yeah Jimmy: but that's not an excuse Jimmy: I don't wanna do that Janis: can be Janis: it's valid Jimmy: I like you too much for that bollocks Jimmy: it's valid that I'm a dickhead & you can hate me a bit Jimmy: nowt else Janis: well I don't alright so stop Jimmy: [takes her hand & holds it] Jimmy: let's go then Janis: [drops hand 'cos not over it fully] Janis: can you just Janis: learn how to time this shit better Jimmy: It's not like there's a plan Janis: well this is the second time you've done this basically directly after so Janis: probably think about getting one Jimmy: I Jimmy: how else can I say I'm sorry? Janis: you can't Janis: just warning you, mood killer Jimmy: bollocks can't I Jimmy: come on Jimmy: whatever you want Janis: just wait like five minutes next time, yeah Jimmy: I'm not planning a next time Janis: fine Janis: [starts walking] Janis: keep up Jimmy: I'm going home Janis: are you serious Jimmy: like you said, it's been a shit day Janis: thanks a fucking lot Jimmy: I'm doing you a favor girl Jimmy: the mood's dead Janis: who asked you to Janis: and fuck you Jimmy: you're asking me Jimmy: I can actually read, like Janis: where Jimmy: 🙄 Janis: fuck off Janis: where Janis: I didn't Jimmy: get between the lines Janis: oh, all the stuff I didn't say, yeah? Janis: that's all you're concerned with now Jimmy: piss off Jimmy: no Jimmy: you've said enough to be going on with Jimmy: I made it too weird, it's not on you anyway Janis: Jesus Christ Janis: seriously Janis: just stop, come on Jimmy: I can't Jimmy: what are you doing here? Jimmy: you're Jimmy: & I'm just Janis: What do you mean what am I doing here? Janis: we're Janis: I'm your girlfriend Janis: and not such a shitty fucking person I wanna see you go back to your Dad so he can make your day worse what the actual fuck Janis: how is that not on me, that you'd rather Jimmy: I want you to want me to stay 'cause you do Jimmy: not 'cause he's a fucking dick Jimmy: but now you don't Jimmy: 'cause I'm as much of a dick Janis: how many times and ways can I tell you I do Janis: and you ain't Janis: this is a ridiculous conversation Jimmy: [this boy is lowkey about to cry my soft son] Jimmy: I don't know what to do Jimmy: [sits] Janis: [sits with] Janis: Jimmy Janis: I'm sorry Janis: can't we just agree to forget about it Jimmy: [puts his head on her shoulder cos v sad] Janis: Tell me what to do for you, babe Jimmy: don't leave Jimmy: I'm sorry I fucked it up but don't Janis: I ain't Janis: it's alright Janis: I mean it Janis: nothing that ain't fixable Jimmy: so let me know how to fix it Janis: just don't go home Jimmy: I can't Jimmy: I don't know why I said that Jimmy: proof that I'm not censoring myself I suppose Janis: I know you aren't Janis: you don't have to, I know I Janis: probably overreact to shit sometimes Jimmy: [actually lols again cos same bitch] Jimmy: me too Jimmy: you said, thank fuck nobody was relying on you or whatever when I was talking about Bobby & Cass before Jimmy: I'm not trying to be a burden of bollocks for you today Jimmy: that's it Janis: [lols with] Janis: You aren't Janis: I was just trying to show I knew I had it easier in that respect Janis: I think Jimmy: I've fucked your day up from getting sacked onward Jimmy: you don't need it Janis: well I want it so deal with it Jimmy: [looks at her with love bitch] Janis: [makes stupid face again like 'what' 'cos cannot deal] Jimmy: [kisses her cos likewise can't deal & will say highkey shit] Janis: Are you ready now? Jimmy: [kisses her again cos cheeky like that] Jimmy: am now Jimmy: are you ready to get drunk with some other dickheads? Janis: as long as one of 'em is you Jimmy: top dickhead me Jimmy: king of Janis: I'll allow it Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: we need to sort ourselves out first we look mad Janis: bit halloween for april maybe Jimmy: only a bit Jimmy: [takes a quick pic of her so she can see how much blood is on her] Janis: Well, if I didn't love myself before Janis: 😍 Jimmy: I like it but Jimmy: I'm weird Janis: you're embracing it now, yeah Jimmy: maybe Jimmy: for right now Janis: gonna lose it's sting as an insult but Janis: I like it Jimmy: I'll think of a new one Jimmy: it's alright Janis: your creativity knows no bounds, babe Jimmy: gotta stay #goals Jimmy: & keep my muse in a job Jimmy: one of us needs to be working Janis: a suitably #richgirl 'job' Janis: one notch above calling myself an 'influencer' still, thank God Jimmy: if I draw you an artsy nude so you can keep your actual of twitter, will you love me madly again? Janis: perhaps Janis: if you're gonna make me look like an old man then no Jimmy: 👌 it'll be my masterpiece Jimmy: no wrinkles just blood, 'cause your #kink Janis: you like it too shut up Jimmy: could be from Mia's severed head Jimmy: everybody'd like it then Janis: Hot Janis: I'd really love you forever then Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: consider it done Janis: [Gets up and puts out a hand to pull him up] Jimmy: [takes her hand 'cause he WANNA HOLD IT] Janis: I promised to patch you up Janis: and give you a blowjob, actually so Janis: get a wriggle on Jimmy: you could've got out of that Jimmy: I didn't remember Janis: 💔 Janis: literally Jimmy: I wouldn't forget it once it happened Jimmy: that's the real 💔 Janis: I won't feel sorry for you, boy Janis: the cheek, not to remember everything I say Janis: how un #goals of you Jimmy: you distracted me with a lot of #goals shit you did right here Jimmy: in my defense Janis: I don't know if we're allowing it Janis: I'll consult the girls Jimmy: baby Jimmy: please Janis: You know that actually works on me Janis: how shaming Jimmy: [whispers it in her ear too 'cause he's a dickhead] Jimmy: how do you feel now instead? Janis: I really cannot go down on you right here Janis: I draw the line so stop please Jimmy: [sexy little earlobe moment 'cause he's a shit] Jimmy: 👌 Janis: Um, no you don't Janis: [Pulls him back and kisses him] Jimmy: make your mind up, girl Jimmy: stopping or starting Janis: Your fault Jimmy: I was making you feel no shame Jimmy: you're welcome Janis: Hmm 😑 Janis: you're very Jimmy: do I wanna know Janis: you know you wanna know everything Jimmy: but we should go before it gets properly dark Janis: why, you scared Jimmy: piss off am I Jimmy: but I do remember you saying you wanted to see me when you were blowing me so Jimmy: not using all my battery on the torch Jimmy: don't like you that much Janis: 😏 Janis: suddenly he remembers Jimmy: shut up Jimmy: the kiss brought it back to me Janis: not gonna have you claiming amnesia from this Janis: calling bullshit right now Jimmy: 😂 Janis: can't be throwing out that many cliches Janis: even these morons will cotton on Jimmy: me? cliched Jimmy: leave it out Janis: 😶 Jimmy: if they made a flick on my life dickhead's be saying that don't happen Jimmy: #original Janis: send the screenplay in to my little brother then Janis: I'll check it out some time Jimmy: I'll get on that now I got all this free time Janis: man of leisure Jimmy: gonna have to do my homework Jimmy: no excuses Jimmy: 🎻🎻 Janis: ew Janis: i'm not doing it with you Jimmy: come over & we'll say we're doing it Jimmy: 😏😏 Janis: that's more like it, nerd Jimmy: you're a nerd Janis: I am not Janis: 👊🍱💰 Jimmy: [playfully shoves her] Jimmy: the fact you reckon that's the kind of lunch I'm taking Jimmy: sort it out, rich girl Janis: [shoulder barges back but gentle 'cos careful girl] Janis: I was very limited by emojis Janis: and did not stalk you, so Janis: I'll ask Gracie Jimmy: you coulda done 🍕🍞🍟🧀 you weirdo Jimmy: even 🥗 Janis: yeah right 😂 Jimmy: what you laughing for? Jimmy: you coulda even done 🍽 Jimmy: you fucked up, nerd Janis: you don't eat salads Janis: you rude bitch Jimmy: I don't eat whatever the fuck emoji you went with Jimmy: [does a hair ruffle like he's Tess in the past & she's Fraze but he's a pisstaking fool] Janis: it was a box i was aiming for lunch box Janis: 😡 Janis: [does face] Jimmy: [lols again cos she cute] Janis: Don't think you can cute your way outta this Jimmy: what if I'm hot? Janis: wouldn't that be the dream Janis: c'est la vie, nerd Jimmy: 💔💔💔 Janis: Poor baby Jimmy: I'm in so much pain now Jimmy: brutal Jimmy: 🎻🎻🎻🎻 Janis: [kisses him but pulls on his pouty lip] Jimmy: 😳 Janis: So cute Jimmy: [kisses her cos she's cute & hot & the dream bye] Janis: Okay Janis: you're hot too Jimmy: 👌 Jimmy: now we've established that, come on Janis: 👌 Jimmy: 👍