#it was so hard to post this for no reason aaa but finally it worked as a screenshot from my phone kcjwnkwej
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credits for the pics of rekha sharma edited with orange eyes to @dykesynthezoid <3
#she's been in my mind nonstop so i just had to do it <3 and ofc to lyrics of slow like honey by fiona apple#armand#fem armand#moodboard#interview with the vampire#it was so hard to post this for no reason aaa but finally it worked as a screenshot from my phone kcjwnkwej#my post ♡#fave
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an art gallery had never looked this pretty ⋆ kwh



۶ৎ genre: fluff, crack (?) wc: 1.4k warnings: none, other than mentions of woonhak's lil food and video game obsession !
۶ৎ notes: first post + first time writing ! mostly in woonhak's pov. lmk if i missed anything. aaa the intro is too chaotic i love it :p feel free to share your thoughts! <3
۶ৎ now playing: an art gallery could never be as unique as you
۶ৎ
woonhak's the type of guy to just spend all his free time playing video games, especially with his leehan and jaehyun hyung. trust me, they're also sick of this silly obsession of his. the only way to get him out of this rabbit hole? food.
leehan and jaehyun enters the room, sighing as they tried to drain their energies for some reason... which obviously didn't work. and of course, they're greeted with this typical sight to see: woonhak's *unsurprisingly* playing video games, as usual.
"hey, can't we do something fun today? i'm bored as hell." jaehyun said as he flops down the floor, lightly banging his head at the floor. leehan gave it a thought. a light bulb pops up just right above his head– "ooo, what about the art gallery nearby? i've never been to one, and i think it'll be fun to visit with you guys!" leehan's face lit up, pulling a puppy fish...? face hoping it works. literally a "pretty please?" can be seen in his face, i mean who can resist this cutie?... well, woonhak can.
sure, the two can just leave him here. but come on, as the nice guys they are, they aren't just gonna leave their baby to rot in this room, playing games for the rest of his life, right?
jaehyun uses both of his hands to rub his temple, even closing his eyes just for an idea to spark in– aha! jaehyun's lips forms a little smirk just right at the corner, obviously receiving a great idea. leehan stares at him weirdly with all these extra stuff he did, but come on, that's jaehyun, that's the most normal he had ever been... today.
leehan watches jaehyun as he creeps up behind woonhak. woonhak is too focused on the game, but he can surely feel his hyung's presence. he sighs, putting the controler down, "hyung, what do you want?" now woonhak's focus completely shifted at him, he immediately sits down next to him, "hey, woonhak. what about we go get food just right around the corner?" leehan who was silently watching them raises his eyesbrows, giving a "when did our plan go from going to the art gallery to... eating!?" face. jaehyun hushes him, replying back with a "just trust me."
of course, woonhak hears the word "food," it's an immediate yes for him. "pft, hyung, why didn't you just say so? i'll go change real quick." he said as he stands up to finally leave the living room.
jaehyun flops down right next to leehan, throwing him a smirk, pointing that this is all part of his plan. leehan thinks hard, wah. this guy's pretty smart despite being weird. he gives jaehyun a "🫵👍🫵👍" which made jaehyun let out a small chuckle.
۶ৎ
the three arrived right at the front of the art gallery. woonhak had obviously been tricked. he glares at jaehyun for fooling him. leehan insisted it'll be fun... as he scooches over at the middle to prevent a snowman and puppy fight to happen!
woonhak's mouth keeps shifting left to right, clearly bored as he would rather play games than stare at paintings he wasn't even into in the first place. despite being uninterested, he still roamed around the gallery without his hyungs.
"that one's colors are too bright." ooh, that one looks like something i'd put in my minecraft house for sure." "is this what they call abstract?-" snap! with just like that, it seemed that the world had stopped for woonhak. how can someone be prettier than these paintings that surrounds them? how can someone outshine a room full of art? how is someone art themselves? how- snap! his world started to spin again as leehan snaps his fingers to get woonhak's attention, "are you enjoying the art gallery?" wrong timing, leehan. he might've just lost a walking art because of you!
woonhak just shakes his head, avoiding leehan's question. he starts walking around again trying to shrug off the thought about the girl he had just seen. they probably won't see each other again... forever and ever... and EVER!
"do you like this painting?" someone said. before shaking his head a no, he slowly looked at the person. it was the girl he had admired. is she really talking to me!? woonhak tries to compose himself as he's talking to the girl he took interest upon on. "o-oh, yeah. it's interesting." did that sound cool? did i sound alright? gah! he hides his hands behind his back, trying to give off a reserved and calm gentleman, which is the complete opposite of him as his thoughts are running wild, thinking what he was gonna say next.
"well, would you like to know a little history about it?" you can see how eager and excited she is to share facts about this painting knowing no one probably wanted to hear these little facts she prepared. he found himself admiring her more, what can stop him from saying yes to her? – "yeah, that'd be nice."
the two spent a good amount of time chit-chatting about the piece you were barely interested on which definitely changed now. sadly, you two were cut off by jaehyun and leehan signaling you to come back as you were most likely about to leave. she thanks you for taking the time to listen to her. at this point you knew her name, "y/n." and she knew yours.
you didn't know whether you hated how short the time you two had or how your hyungs just cut off your talk with y/n just like that. nevertheless, woonhak found his new interest, for sure.
۶ৎ
these past few days, woonhak has been going outside. of course, his hyungs are glad he finally graduated from his little (huge.) video game obsession. but where has he been going to? they didn't care, as long as they can finally solo the living room and the video game itself, and of course as long as their woonhak comes back home safe and sound.
۶ৎ
as for you, this guy keeps coming back to the art gallery. you find him... quite odd. he'd go back everyday just to ask facts about 4 paintings a day and leave. why won't he just ask for all of them at once? but it didn't really matter, you get to FINALLY share the facts that had been stored in your brain since well... you started this job. weirdly, you also found him cute. i mean he keeps smiling at you, plus he genuinely seemed to listen to your silly history other people wouldn't even bother to.
۶ৎ
you secretly wished there were more paintings in this gallery... as you two head over to the last painting to talk about.
"that's about it. you're all updated with your art knowledge now!" you joked, hoping it'd at least cheer you up, i mean who wouldn't be upset? you bet you might never see this guy again.
he gives out a smile, lightly biting his lips. he looks down and scratches the back of his neck.
"ah, will this weird her out..." woonhak thought to himself, but he was ready to take this risk. at least if he gets rejected, he can just go cry and play video games again, swearing to never visit another art gallery, especially this one– okay, maybe he's overthinking this too much. but why not take the risk, right?
his lips curled, his eyes shifted all around the gallery, trying not to lock any eye contact with her. he then sighs, scratching his head this time, "actually there's an art piece i don't know anything yet..." you tilted your head in confusion, huh? you swore you showed him everything already.
"it's... you." gosh, this is embarrassing, he murmured to himself. he wanted to show her how sincere he is. he finally locks eye contact with your. your breath stops, this guy you've been crushing on... he's oddly dumb? (y/n's dumb.)
"huh, pfft, i'm no art piece, woonhak. but i swear, i already told you all the history about all the paintings here. are you sure?" he- he couldn't hold his laugh, his hands try to pull the air, trying to stop his laughter. "no- no- i meant that i also wanted to know more about you, y/n. i'm interested in you, silly."
to your surprise, he also liked you?? i mean, it was pretty obvious, why would a guy come back everyday just to learn facts about paintings, right...?
"i've never seen someone as pretty as you in an art gallery, y/n. wait- is this weird??" his words cracked you up as he realizes he had probably been spouting nonsense at you. though, it was pretty adorable of him. you couldn't help but smile, "nope, no it's not. i like you too, woonhak." the two couldn't but to chuckle at each other's cheesy lines. who knew you'd be able to find love in an art gallery?
۶ৎ
if you liked this, a like, reblog, or comment is highly appreciated, thank you! ><
#bnd imagines#bnd au#bnd woonhak#woonhak au#woonhak fluff#boynextdoor#bnd x reader#bnd#woonhak x reader#woonhak#dearwhs
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Happy new year everyone!!
2024 was strange and I don't even really know where to begin with explaining why. So much happened and so much has changed(mostly for the better) that it would be hard to fully explain everything, but I'd like to just ramble about it for a bit
I don't remember all that much from January-February, just that I was VERY hyperfixated on Vocaloid and Project Sekai and that ultimately influenced the entire rest of my year. In fact, I feel like Vocaloid was pretty much a defining factor of the entire first half of 2024 for me(the second half was defined by something else... But it's probably easy to guess what that was.)
Also HUGE thank you to Angelo, Cornflakes, and Edward for pretty much everything, you guys are some of my longest friends and I appreciate you all SO SO MUCH!!
Then in around June I got into Chonny Jash and that pretty much defined the entire second half of the year for me😭 I mean obviously, it's the reason like 90% of you are here
Somehow it never actually occurred to me that I could and should actually post my art until I started making Chonny Jash fan art, and honestly I'm really happy I did... This is the most people I've seen who genuinely like and care about my art and I can't tha you
nk you all enough for that, so that being said, I would like to credit the first ever drawing of Heart I made for bringing everyone here. I genuinely appreciate all of my mutuals and followers so much and knowing there's people who actually like my art makes me genuinely so happy🫶

And of course I need to thank this for being the ENTIRE reason I met the Freaky Leg Fracture Compendium, aka the CCCClub.. GENUINELY THANK YOU SO MUCH TO @killableroach , @cynicmachine , @xenithiael , and @starcyri , I LOVE YOU GUYS SM🫶🫶🫶
I also owe all of this for leading to the creation of AAA. If it wasn't for the cccc hyperfixation that was so strong I decided to actually draw fan art(which I NEVER really did before) I wouldn't have met the other developers and we wouldn't have this stupid project that, surprisingly, has already acquired a small fanbase. thank you so much to the 5 AAA fans for caring about our work💜
Anyways quick mutual appreciation.....
@vinniemitchell @bluestarlett @adhdrizzy @therewillbenoromance @casualmrboyenjoyer @themoonwithagun @randotam280 and anyone else I'm forgetting, you guys are great🫶🫶
And finally I'll close this off by comparing my first and last drawings of the year.
Thank you all again for everything this year💜
#angelno404#vocaloid#project sekai#colorful stage#project sekai colorful stage#pjsk#chonny jash#chonnys charming chaos compendium#cccc#agitating agony archive#aaa#digital art#artist#once again angel is randomly rambling
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Giant Fucking List of Obscure Video Games I Recommend!
It's finally done!! Took me long enough, but here it is. Over 50 games I recommend. Just in time for the Steam Sale. Holy shit I spent way to much time on this.
Some of these are well known to anyone into the indie/AA gaming scene or just on the internet often, but I still felt the need to mention in case people haven't heard of them. All of these are obscure compared to any AAA game and I'm confident no one would have heard or played all of these.
They all have something I found interesting in someway. I was going to include a trailer for each game, but apparently Tumblr doesn't like that. So I have put a link to a Youtube playlist for all of them in the same order as this list. Some of these games are also on various consoles to, but I can confirm they're all on Steam beyond one.
I only picked games I've played personally. I know of many other good obscure games, but haven't tried or bought them yet so they don't get on the list. Also many games on this list remain unfished to me, but that's more due to time and other life shit then them getting bad.
There's a lot of fucking games In this list so hopefully you find something you've never tried before and give it a shot. All these games are on Steam with one exception, but that's a free game. I also organized them by genres that make perfect sense to me.
Trailers Link:
The Best Game Ever:
Outer Wilds
Fuck it let's just start with the only mandatory game on this list you need to play. You know how nearly every space game is a overpromised underdelivered fucking mess? Like all of them.
Outer Wilds is the actual good one. Don't want to say much more then that. This is very much an experience that you need to know as little as possible to get the best experience. Not even linking the trailer in the playlist.
Absolutely play this game if you had to pick only 1 thing on this list.
EarthBoundLikes:
OMORI
OMORI is a game about a group of kids who go on magical adventures and save the day. That's it. Nothing else sinister going on here.
It's a well known indie game and for good reason. It's fucking good. One of my favorite games of all time.
Art style is peak. A mix of pixel and pencil drawn art that works so damn well for me. The battle system is turn based and revolves around changing emotions and teamwork. It mixes a happy child like vibe with a darkness underneath it, which is right up my alley. A tale of trauma and grief. I'm still fucked up thinking about some story bits in there.
All the characters are wonderful and the story is helped a lot by keeping it focused on a small group of friends.
Play it.
LISA: The Painful and LISA: The Joyful
LISA: The Painful/Joyful are a pair of games that fuck. They fuck hard.
They're morbid, tackle many taboos, and have a dark but also stupid sense of humor. The visuals are nothing groundbreaking, but this isn't a game that needs perfect pristine pixel art. The combat system is a lot of fun, but takes very clear inspiration from Earthbound. The story is just perfect though.
You play Brad whos on a journey to rescue his adoptive daughter who was kidnapped in a post apocalyptic world of only men. You meet the strangest allies and the game has a lot of odd characters in it. Want a lawyer fish in your party? This game has it.
It does not shy away from throwing punches and is not for anyone who can't handle a story that tackles themes of abuse, depression, suicide, and more. The game also has a sequel I don't want to say to much about, but it's absolutely worth it as well.
If you want a fun and fucked up 2D RPG adventure and somehow haven't played this then please do so.
Mandatory Metroidvania Soulslike Indie Game Darlings:
Ender Lilies: Quietus of the Knights
Ender Lilies is the first of many metroidvania's on this list. The indie scene is filled with them and for good reason. The formula works so damn well.
What I love about Ender Lilies is the concept of the player character. You play a white priestess who is also a child and helpless on her own. However, you can summon the spirits of allies and slain enemies to fight for you and those spirits are all your attacks. Gameplay is the same as any other Metroidvania, but knowing I'm this helpless child in this world infected by blight really sells me on the setting.
There's nothing revolutionary to this entry in the pantheon of Metroidvanias, but the visuals and setting are why I recommend it. This game is a slow descent into hell. Also you do get a big heavy hammer attack and any game with a big hammer weapon attack is a good game. Big bonks.
Craving a Metroidvania with a macabre setting? This will do it.
GRIME
GRIME is something else. I don't hear anyone talk about this game and it's a damn shame. I don't even know how to even describe GRIMEs setting. You play as essentially a sentient black hole on a rock body. You go through, with lore slowly revealed as is the Metroidvania stable, and absorb your enemies.
This games aesthetic is best described as fleshy stone. It's very unique visually and what made me want to try it out. As for gameplay you'll need to learn parrying as this games combat system heavily relies on it.
This game surprised me and has a entire level I never expected with one very unique boss to top that off. Also be warned. This game is very much a platformer as well. Similar to how the Ori games are, not just pure combat challenges. If you like your metroidvanias with little to no platforming then you won't enjoy parts of this game, but nothing as difficult as things in Hollow Knight.
If you enjoy metroidvanias then this is a must play. More people need to talk about it.
Salt and Sanctuary
This is where it all started. Certainly not the first Metroidvania by any means, but the first 2D Soulslike Metroidvania or at the least first advertised as such. The devs intended to make Dark Souls in 2D and they did it. Before Hollow Knight, the games listed above, or so many others that took inspirations from Souls in the 2D world, was this game. I know this game was popular with the souls community as it came out, but I don't really hear about it anymore. Hollow Knight just dominated all discussion.
The controls and combat are very much Dark Souls but in 2D. The lore is cryptic and hidden away. There's a fuckton of weapons and spells and multiple playthroughs worth of stuff. The game is hard though Hollow Knight would easily one up it in terms of difficulty.
This game also has covenants that are actually good and the mechanics around them are vastly improved over any souls game that has covenants. I won't go into detail, but I wish the souls games copied this games mechanics for that.
The setting is high fantasy with the lovely dark bloody horror underneath it all. The art style can turn people away, it's not as pretty as other 2D souslikes, but I enjoy it personally. It fits.
The game has a lot to explore and you can get lost in its world pretty easily. I remember walking into a boss room from the exit somehow and got behind the boss and it was all intended if you navigated around him.
If you can appreciate or just get past the visuals and want to see where the 2D soulslike genre began then you should play it.
Metroidvania's Before the Dark Age of Soulslikes
Dust: An Elysian Tail
Long ago there was a time where Metroidvanais didn't have soulslike mechanics defaulted in and set in these bleak post apocalyptic worlds. I have 3 of them to recommend. Starting With Dust: An Elysian Tail
This is a fun little game. A game that I'm not sure many people know about or would think to play today. Metroidvanias pre Hollow Knight tend to get forgotten when I see people about them now. It has a mix of platforming and hectic combat. I remember the game having a cool spin sword attack with a even cooler aerial attack. I liked it a lot when I played it many many years ago.
The art style is colorful and everyone is an anthropomorphic animal. More games need anthropomorphic animals beyond catgirl or rabbitgirl, seriously I grew up on shit like sly Cooper and Ratchet and Clank.
You play as Dust and are accompanied by Fidget. you got a magic sword and you kill a bunch of shit while saving the day. Just a fun little Metroidvania that doesn't overstay and go on forever.
It may be dated in some ways, but if you're a fan of these types of games and want to play a older one then here you go.
Guacamelee!
The combat in this game feel great. Another little forgotten gem of a Metroidvania. It has such a unique style to it and has a fun cartoony vibe. It's pretty fucking great.
You play as a farmer who dons a luchador mask to save his friend he loves and the world being taken over. The combat is a mix of punches, kicks, and throws which is unique from the usual swords and magic these types of games tend to default to. As the game goes along enemies will have shields that need certain moves to break and you'll be switching from the land of the dead and living in combat and platforming.
Both this and Dust before it don't reinvent the genre or anything, but have their own unique charms that I recommend them both if you're a fan of Metroidvanias.
Cave Story+
This is a old classic. The original Cave Story came out in 2004, and was released with a enhanced version in 2011. This is a must play Metroidvania and an old gem. It's the oldest game on this list technically.
This game has little to no melee combat, but instead goes all in on using guns. More Metroid then Vania in that sense. What's unique to the combat is enemies will drop experience that will level up your guns automatically. Each gun can be upgraded to 3 levels, but when you take damage you lose experiences and levels. This adds a extra layer or rewards and punishment to getting hit that I like. Your weapons are perfectly usable at level 1 so it's not like you're fucked, but it gives a greater incentive to avoid damage.
It has fun characters and and fun gameplay. It's a genuine indie gem that I think everyone should play.
Pixel Action Adventure Games With A Dash of RPG Elements to Taste:
ANNO: Mutationem
This game is a pixel art cyberpunk adventure. I adore the art style. It's a 2.5D action platformer set in a futuristic setting. You're on a quest to save your brother with the help of your hacker friend/girlfriend. A quest which leads to a far more complicated story.
The story in this game goes off the rails in ways I love, but I know it threw people off. People have compared the latter half to Evangelion and It can be confusing to follow at times. I still highly recommend it, even if you get lost near the end. A simpler story in terms of Lore would have worked better, but I say fuck it. Go all in.
To me the appeal of this game is the setting. A fascinating cyberpunk sci-fi setting shown through wonderful pixel art. Just walking around the various cities was a joy on its own. There's a lot of attention to detail and I think it's worth playing for that alone. Combat is your standard side-scrolling Metroidvaniaish kind of stuff with various weapons and upgrades and all that. I found it a little challenging at times, but this isn't a game meant for extreme difficulty from what I remember.
If you want to play as hot badass woman in a cyberpunk setting given life through detailed pixel art, then this is the game for you.
CrossCode
This is the most dense indie game on this whole list. CrossCode has so much to do. The game is expansive and slowly drip feeds you with more. You have 5 skill trees, 4 of which are tied to an element, multiple upgrade paths in them. You have a mix of melee combat with twin stick shooter mechanics thrown in. The game has multiple dungeons with puzzles that are both difficult to figure out and then execute the solution for. These aren't like a 2D Zelda dungeon where things never get to complicated, I really took a lot of time with every dungeon.
The setting takes place on another moon physically, but its actually all virtual and a MMO people are playing from all over the galaxy. Though the game itself isn't a MMO really. You play as a set character in a set linear story that's unrelated to that actual in lore story of the MMO.
The characters are fun and the setting is a joy to explore. There's a lot of side content and I don't remember any of it being a drag. This games also challenging and I know It took me a bit to progress at various points. The pixel art is very detailed, especially with the outdoor environments.
This game will keep you engaged for a while and there's challenging DLC and even fun incentives to play new game plus. This is just all around a solid game experience.
Hyper Light Drifter
I played this game a long time ago so details are hazy, but I know I really enjoyed it. It's top down and filled with action. You got a sword. You got a gun. You go kill things and I do remember many challenging combat encounters.
I have forgotten all story elements, but even now I still remember some imagery that reminded me of Evangelion, which is always a plus. Though story was never the main draw to games for me so the setting and combat were all I needed to keep engaged.
Not the most descriptive review of the game, but I know this is one of the furthest game on this list from when I played it and I only went through it once. It's a cool game though and if the trailer enticed you then you owe it to yourself to get it.
Phoenotopia: Awakening
I adore this little hidden gem of a game. If CrossCode is the most dense indie game on this list then this is a very close second. Possibly even more dense, I truly can't decide for sure. It's cute, funny, charming, and full of legitimate challenges.
You play as Gail who lives in a small town village. Some shit happens that I won't give away, but you end needing to travel the land and go on a fun adventure. The story is full of comedic and lively characters. It never takes itself to seriously or gets really dark which Is a nice change of pace.
This game really is an adventure. You will travel a lot and get very familiar with any hub area. There's secrets and puzzles packed all over and gives you good reason to revisit. A nice drip feed of progress is felt as you unlock more stuff.
In terms of combat it's bar far the most simplistic on this list and could even frustrate others, but like everything else in this game it has charm and I adore it. The simple mechanics don't mean no challenge though. I was stuck often, but felt so satisfying when I won.
Some of the late game areas can be bullshit and will frustrate you, but stick with it. This is a genuine top tier hidden indie gem that got no attention. Honestly just under Outer Wilds this would be the other must buy. Absolutely play this.
Vampire Survivorlikes:
20 Minutes Till Dawn
Everyone knows about Vampire Survivor and everyone knows many games came out that tried to capture that style of gameplay. This one is the only one of those I've played and it's wonderful.
You unlock multiple characters and multiple guns with various upgrade trees. Kill the horde, survive, upgrade, survive even longer. Each level only takes 20 minutes, hence the title. I appreciate that as the game would never end with how strong you end up being by the end after you learn the mechanics.
This isn't anything groundbreaking, but if you need to kill half a hour then it's a fun thing to play.
Hawklikes:
Umurangi Generation
Let's fucking go!! This game rules!
As someone who is going to pursue photography more seriously as a hobby this game is perfect. Unlike something like Pokemon Snap or games with photo modes, this game really captures the feeling of holding a physical camera and the moment to moment decisions you make with each shot.
You unlock different lenses and control each shot as you would a real camera. After each photo you can edit it on the spot purely for your own creative reasons. The visuals are low poly and very colorful.
The game has a tony hawk style of progression. A hawklike if you will. You get dropped in a level and are given a list of photos to try and take. You can of course take photos of anything. You have a limited amount of film and can find more throughout the level.
Also there's a story. There's a dark undercurrent to the whole thing and the game is very overtly political in all the right ways. Don't like politics in your games? Fuck you! This game dives right in while still maintaining the core gameplay loop. Need more games like this please.
Please buy this game and it's DLC.
Action Games:
Furi
Top tier action game. It's a boss rush game, that's it. 10 bosses with some vague story that briefly connects them. It's not bloated with bullshit and knows exactly what to focus on.
The combat is a mix of intense melee combat with parries and dodges and the like, with twin stick shooting. No upgrades. No farming. No choosing between this weapon or that. No additional moves or mechanics. You fight a tutorial boss which teaches you everything and then you go. You have the full toolkit from the start and that lets you master it slowly over the game.
It's so fucking satisfying finally winning and knowing you improved and earned that win. I like the story as well. It's not that complex, but the ending bits worked for me.
If you want a genuine good action game that has no bullshit attached then get this.
Amid Evil
There's not much to say about this one other then it's really fucking fun. It's a first person action game where you use magic and weapons to go through combat filled levels. You have health and mana that all weapons use outside of your axe. The levels are filled with secrets, you move fast, and it's just a fun action game.
Sometimes a game isn't more then that and it beats games that are stuffed with unnecessary mechanical bloat. If you want a fun first person action game that's not just a full shooter then this is the game for you.
Adventure Games:
The Cat Lady and Lorelai
I love these games. No one ever talks about them or knows about them and they will certainly linger in your mind. The devs have made 2 other games that I have yet to get to so for now I am recommending only these.
Play The Cat Lady first. It's the first one and tells the story of a very depressed middle aged woman who gets a second chance at life, at a cost.
Lorelai is about a young woman in a very abusive household trying to survive while seeing what lengths she will go to save those she loves.
Both these games revolve around deals with a devil and feature a lot of horrific violence. Fun!
The stories in both evoke a creepy disturbing feeling and you're always on edge. I won't say these are straight horror games, but they sure use horror imagery. The art style really helps sells it. The animations or character models may not be the most beautiful thing around, but it has that indie charm I love. The voice acting isn't perfect either, but these aren't negatives for me. These are passion projects and imperfections are what make any piece of art shine brighter. Real people put their soul into these games and it shows.
The gameplay is standard adventure game fair, but all keyboard controlled. So no endless mouse clicking everything on the screen. which works wonderfully. Though being pure adventure games you're here more for the story then the moment to moment gameplay.
Please play these.
Detention
Detention is probably well known due to the controversy with Red Candle Games other game, Devotion being wiped online for shitty reasons. It's available now on their own websites store, though I still have never played it. I should one day as Detention was pretty fucking good.
The gameplay is the usual 2D adventure game fair. A lot of clicking and puzzle solving with some horror thrown in. The story and setting are where it's at though.
The game is unique in that it's made from Taiwanese devs and the games setting is rooted in their cultures history. I don't want to give away any real details beyond that, but it certainly left an impact and seeing a game not set in Europe, America, Japan, or any fantasy equivalent to those was refreshing. The games also not super long and could easily be beaten in a day.
Go buy it. Play it on a long free night. Support these devs.
Rime
I love the aesthetic of this game. Cel shading indie colorful goodness. I got this for the visuals alone and was very happy the game that came with it was good to. Visuals are a major factor in me getting interested in a game and the reveal trailer was enough for me to play it.
It's very light and cryptic on story for most of it as to be expected from this kind of game. You're a kid, you wake up on a beach and go forth exploring. You solve puzzles and hide from danger and go through each of the unique levels trying to piece together whats going on.
Like the game before, this isn't a super long one. Shouldn't take more then a day or a few to get through it all. Though I do recommend you take your time and explore like I did. Let yourself be immersed in the setting.
This is another example of just a pure perfect indie game. Doesn't overstay it's welcome, tells a simple but cryptic story, and has lovely visuals.
Atominous
This is the one of the few games on this whole list that I would say is truly obscure. In fact I have no doubt this is the most obscure. If you're big into indie games then nothing on this list will honestly surprise you, but I'm confident this is the exception.
In this free game you place as a a little guy who's job is like pest control. Instead of bugs your job is to collect and protect the world from rare atoms called Atominous. Basically little atoms that can alter reality. You go into a big house and your job is to find them through the power of puzzle solving and clicking every little thing you see.
This game is all about clicking everything. Nearly every object has unique text that pops up, if not multiple. You find keys to open more of the house and slowly suck up the atominous atoms and clean up the place.
That's it. It's a fun quirky little free game that shouldn't take more then a couple hours. No excuse not to try it, it's free. It's also the only game not on steam, but instead here
Adventure Games Where You Hit Things:
TUNIC
TUNIC is a lovely indie game. You play as a little cute fox and go on a adventure to save your poor trapped mom. such a cute game :3
I adore the visuals, I love low poly stuff and the game is full of charm. Looking at this game makes me happy. The game is like a mix of a top down Zelda and Fez and it being reminiscent of FEZ was what really took me by surprise. I won't go further in how it's like FEZ, but it really elevated the game for me.
It's a fun top down game with simple fun combat. You kill enemies, find key items, unlock more of the world, and get fed cryptic lore. The perfect formula for a fun little indie game. The game is decently challenging to with it's boss fights, and overall a nice fun little experience with some neat surprises.
TUNIC is wonderful, go play it.
Kena: Bridge of Sprits
This is the most PS2 game I've played since the PS2. I mean that as a compliment. This game felt like going back in time to a simpler time.
Visually the game is not at all like the PS2. The visuals are beautiful and has been compared to Pixar. It's bright, colorful, and well polished. To me this is peak aesthetics. This game is worth playing just to see all the work that went into the game's visuals alone.
It reminded me of a PS2 game because it's a self contained fun third person action adventure. Just a fun game with no bullshit holding it down or any other purpose then being a fun adventure. The world is a joy to explore with a nice steady progression. I especially love how the Hub is mostly corrupted and you slowly restore it over the course of the game. Shit like that always feels so good.
There's a lot of unexpected challenge to. Some of the later fights and especially bosses took me a bit to beat. Just like a PS2 game you'll get random difficulty spikes that are so fucking satisfying to beat.
I highly recommend this game.
Adventure Games Where You're in the Desert:
Sable
Sable is a coming of age story presented in a very fun interactive package. This is a game about heading out into the world and exploring on your own whim to figure out what your character becomes as an adult.
You play as Sable, a young adult girl who has to leave her tribe and head into the wider world to discover herself. The goal is to find mask which representative a life path and pick one by the end. The actual game is about heading into a desert open world, solving puzzles, helping NPC's, and discovering what bits of hidden lore hide throughout. You do this all on a hoverbike you can customize as you unlock more parts.
As always the art style is important to me and this game has something really unique. The characters animation is low framerate and it can be off putting to some, but of course I loved it as I love any odd creative choice. I love the lighting and colors to. It's hard to describe just why I was so mesmerised by the art style, but I can safely say it's one of my all time favorites.
The only negative goes to technical issues. The game ran like shit on my PC and my PC isn't bad. Even people with far better PC's then me ran into frame rate issues and others didn't have any. Sometimes games aren't optimized well, but this game was so magical to me that I loved it, despite the tech issues.
It's a very chill game. You want to explore a cool world at a slow pace and get lost in it? Sable's the game for you.
It Comes In Waves
This is a short game where you have to start over if you die. A penalty I feared, but truthfully this isn't that difficult of an experience. You start on one end of a desert and have to carry something to the other end as it grows inside a tank on your back.
As you wait for whatever your transporting to grow you will explore minimalist environments with some unique imagery that speaks of a wider history you just have to wonder about. The whole time you have to watch out for raiders and watch your water level. It always depletes and you will need to explore and refill it as you journey on. I also love how you have a map, but the map is like an actual map. It doesn't show you on it, but just the overall area.
This game will take you a hour at best and is unlike anything else on this list. There's something about just slowly walking across the desert, not knowing what's ahead, and hoping you can make it to the next water tank. Just a little experimental game about a harsh journey.
Platformers With 2 Entire Dimensions:
MO: Astray
Ever wanted to play as a little blob? No? Well you should because this game was a hidden gem. I was thrown off by this game at first and then pleasantly surprised by the whole experience.
This game feels like it should be a metroidvania. It's 2D and you're on a broken down ship or facility or something. Nope. This game is fully linear and at first I didn't think I'd like that and was disappointed, but it works so damn well.
You play a slime essentially and you have the magical power to read the last thoughts and minds of corpses by settling on their rotten fleshy head. With this power and other little story tidbits you learn what's going on, your purpose, and so on.
There's no combat in this game really. You move by shooting yourself in any direction you can see and you can stick to surfaces. There's danger. There's enemies. There's boss fights. All without the usual fair of attack/dodge roll, that's standard for 2D metroidvanias now. This game is something different and that alone makes it worth it.
Also a note on the boss fights. All of them felt very unique from each other I prefer having a few well crafted unique bosses then having a bunch of the same type of fight over and over again.
Another genuine hidden gem you should try.
Platformers With 3 Entire Dimensions:
Frogun
Frogun is adorable. It's like a N64 game and I love it.
You have a frog grappling hook and go through little short levels that ramp up in difficulty. There's optional challenges in each one. The art style is absolutely going for that early 3D low poly vibe that is starting to become more popular.
This is a perfect example of just a fun video game for the sake of being a fun video game. No serious story or message or intense complicated gameplay mechanics. Just a cute 3D platformer reminiscent of a older time.
Also I played this back when I used to stream and a Frogun speedrunner showed up in chat and helped me pull off a couple speedrunning tricks so that was fun.
If you want something simple and fun then here it is.
Cyber Hook
The ultimate speedrunning game. You have a gun, a grappling hook, and the ability to slow down time. This is a pure platformer. You enter levels with the goal of getting through as fast as you can.
I never got great at it, but the few times I really got going fast and flew through a level felt awesome. It's so satisfying finally doing things right after many failures and you will fail a lot.
There's really not much more to it. Neat visuals with satisfying and simple mechanics. If that sounds fun to you then check it out.
Marble It Up! Ultra
Platformers really are just the perfect mechanic to make fun mindless games with. Marble It Up! Ultra is another simple 3D platformer that's just purely focused on being fun.
As always it's not that complicated either. You're a marble and you try to reach the end of each stage with a time limit. There's items to stop time, make you jump higher, and go faster. Just all about building up speed and there's tons of ways to skip past parts of levels. Like the two games before, this one is perfect for speedrunning.
It's fun, go buy it.
RPG's:
Roadwarden
I was going to make a big post about why I preferred this to BG3, but scrapped it. BG3 is fun, but the story just bores me from the get go. Where BG3 failed for me Roadwarden succeeded. All story and all fantastic.
This is a text based RPG. Very simplistic visuals which show just enough to let your imagination handle most of the work.
You play a roadwarden who has the lovely job to travel the dangerous roads and help the townsfolk all while working on your greater goals. You pick between 3 starting classes and those do change how you approach things quite a bit. You have a time limit and that will force you to prioritize things over others. You can't do everything in a single playthrough. Your decisions matter and you aren't going to figure everything out.
You have to manage your health, money, hunger, and cleanliness. You will never have enough money for everything and that helps create more interesting choices. You have to manage what you do in a day. You meet a lot of people and forge allies or enemies and it's all told with stellar writing.
If you want a well written fantasy interactive story then you must play this game.
RPG's With Intense High-Octane Turn Based Combat:
Epic Battle Fantasy 5
A long time ago in times forgotten there existed these ancient relics called Flash games. Maybe one day I'll talk about old flash games I was into, but for now I'm only talking about the latest instalment in one of them. Epic Battle Fantasy is a series of games made by Matt Roszak. They started as little flash games, but have since turned into bigger games that are on Steam. 5 is the latest one and also the best so I'm recommending this one.
I've gone through this game multiple times. This game fucking rules. The game is easy to control, satisfying, and has my favorite turn based combat system period. No seriously, this is my favorite turn based combat system. I could go on what I like about it so much, but I'll spare you all most of the details. I'll say it gets rid of mana entirely and put all your abilities on cooldowns which changes based on what you're using. This just fixes balancing and helps you from spamming heals and all that. I love this system. It's easy to control, intuitive to understand, full of options, and can have a chaotic randomness I enjoy.
In this game you explore the overworld, solve puzzles, and fight enemies. The story is not at all serious or anything like that. It may not be a Flash game anymore, but it still has the older internet spirit of not taking things to seriously and being a little juvenile. There's also a lot of post game challenges that still are impossible for me to really do well or at all.
You can change the difficulty anytime and another thing I love is the entire game can be controlled with just a mouse. You can use a keyboard to, but a mouse covers everything which I think is neat.
This is such a wonderful combat system and the game I've beaten most on this list. If you want legitimately challenging turn based RPG combat and don't care about story or characters to get that then this game is a must play.
Shadows Over Loathing
Want a lovecraftian mystery RPG injected with a dose of comedy where everybody is a stick figure? Yes? How very specific, but luckily there's a game just for you.
Shadows Over Loathing is a turn based RPG where you search for your missing uncle in a area full of strange locations and characters. I never did play their other game West of Loathing, and I was pleasantly surprised by this one. It was a lot of fun, creative, difficult at times, and had a world I really wanted to explore.
It has a lighthearted comedic tone throughout and the silly art and stick figure characters help with that. The actual turn based combat is fun to. Nothing to complicated but could be challenging to which is needed to help this style of combat really shine.
There's really not much more to it. If this sounds like something you'd enjoy then please check it out.
RPG's Fused With A Light Novel:
Ys VIII: Lacrimosa of DANA
AA games still exist! I finally get to talk about Ys. I've played 3 Ys games and I'm going to talk about my favorite one because of the fun gameplay. This is a very unknown franchise that has existed since the 80's and even now the 10th instalment is set to release later this year.
As for why I'm recommending Ys 8, it's because it has some of the most fun gameplay. The combat is fast paced, encourages good timing, and full of that anime over the top stylish action. You control up to 3 characters and can easily switch between them. Each character plays differently and has their own special moves and everything just feels so satisfying.
You play as generic light novel anime man, Adol. Tagging along is generic tsundere light novel anime girl and other light novel anime characters. Like edgy boy with a gun, loli raised in the wild, and blue haired girl. You crash land on a island and have to survive and find survivors. Much like LOST the story goes off the rails and of course in classic JRPG fashion you need to stop the end of the world somehow. Unlike LOST characters are generic and the usual anime fair.
Despite the lackluster story this game still fucking rules because it's so goddamn fun to play. It also solved crafting forever by making it so you can convert common items into rarer ones making anything you find useful potentially. Seriously it's such a nice feature and all crafting systems without it are lesser.
If you want some fun action combat and don't mind anime bullshit then really, check out the entire franchise. Any of them will do, but this is the one I'd recommend the most.
RPG's Fused With A Light Novel and A WW2 Textbook:
Valkyria Chronicles 1 and 4
Picture this. WW2, but with anime and magical girls. Japan just never stops with these incredible ideas.
I adore these 2 games. I haven't played 2 or 3 as those are PSP games and I don't hear great things. However I can confirm 1 and 4 are fucking fantastic.
These games are tactical RPG's where you command troops one by one in missions. Most are usually about capturing a enemy base, but there's a lot of variety beyond that in both of them. You lay out your troops at the start plus your commander who's in the tank. You get a set level of CP per turn and each CP is used to control a unit. The actual game is probably piss easy for experienced tactical game players, but I'm not that at all. I found it legitimately difficult, both games.
What sets it apart is the game turns into a sort of third person shooter when controlling the units. You can freely move up to your AP and get one action to do. If it was just top down the whole time I'd find that not that interesting, but actually moving around and taking cover unit by unit is very engaging. There's 5 classes in the first game and a 6th added in the fourth game. Each class can be upgraded as well along with weapons, equipment, and the tanks.
The stories in both are nothing special truthfully. It's anime WW2 with silly dumb anime characters. I don't mind that and had a lot of fun, but if you can't stand something like Persona then these games will infuriate you. To me stupid anime characters in games can be a lot of fun, like Raz in 4, the dumbest but somehow most entertaining character for me. Expect some silly anime cliches and tone changes and the usual fair for these kinds of games. Even if the story is a big nothing for you, I still think both games are worth it for the gameplay.
Another aspect that I really love is all your units have personality traits that can trigger as you control them. What caught me off guard was that they're both positive and negative ones. There's ones like a woman having man hater and fancies woman as traits, aka the lesbian. There's straight up a guy with misogynist as a trait. Some are lonely, frail, daredevils, have crushes or people they hate, even one with the masochist trait. All these good and bad traits translate into potential buffs or debuffs that can happen in the game.
Sadly these side characters don't get much story in the first game. Just a unique design with some personality traits and maybe a couple in battle lines of dialogue. However, the 4th one introduced squad stories. Essentially little side stories that revolve around the non important squad mates. They were always fun to do and the missions for them are more unique because they are designed around only using those 3 characters.
I recommend both of them, but if you had to play one I'm not sure. 1 has the better story, the overall lore itself establishes in 1, and the gameplay is still fun. 4 has the better gameplay, more unique missions, and the squad stories which were a highlight for me.
Just pick which one sounds more like your thing if you only want to spend the time with one of them. Both are fun.
RPG's About the Harsh Reality of Capitalism:
Recettear: An Item Shop's Tale
I adore this games concept. It takes the common NPC seen in these little RPG adventures, the shopkeeper, and puts you in their shoes. You're father has a big debt to pay off and you now have to sell items out of your house to help pay it off before the deadline.
You lay the items out and then have to haggle your way to a profit. Finding the line of when to haggle and how much is the key to success and I failed miserably. I never did beat this game, but I haven't beaten many games on this list and that won't stop me from telling you to play them. I think the concept alone is enough of a reason to check it out.
The game does have combat as well. You can hire an adventurer to go with you into a dungeon and fight enemies for treasure. I like how you hire someone from the Adventurers Guild, just another cool concept as a typical game would have you play as the character being hired instead all the time. I also like how dungeons are high risk high reward. If they die then you lose most of what you gather and essentially just wasted the day.
It's just a cool concept and a nice change of pace from how a game set in these typical fantasy settings would go. You aren't some savior of the world, but just a shopkeeper trying to pay off debt.
Spooky Games:
Yuppie Psycho
Do you want a game about a corporate building being haunted by dark forces and being a badass fighting your way through it all? That's Control. You just want Control.
Unlike Control which bored me to death after a while. Yuppie Psycho is about a haunted corporate building, but you play a new lowly worker who's been tasked with something far above his pay grade. Brian Pasternack is a new hire who's in way over his head. What should have been a normal corporate jobs turns into a witch hunt, literally.
You aren't a badass and will have to sneak your way to victory, uncovering the buildings hidden secrets along the way. For me that's part of why this works over Control as a effective story. You're kind of a fucking nobody who has to be extra careful and is reluctant to even do this. Far more relatable honestly.
The joy of this game comes from exploring this building and uncovering the secrets and horrors. Each floor is unique and this game gets creative with the corporate horror vibe. I love some of the designs of things and how it blends comedy and horror together. It also has branching paths and even limited save slots which seemed frustrating at first, but wasn't really a big deal. Not saving every chance you can really adds to the tension when sneaking around.
It's not a true horror intense experience, but as someone who is a baby with horror I found a lot of genuine tense moments. It's a real indie gem.
The Complex: Found Footage
Kane Pixels backrooms videos are honestly pretty fucking great. I'm not usually a fan of horror at all, but there's something about these videos that just work for me. Then pgWave decided to make a video game creating the experience of exploring these kinds of spaces.
This is a creepy game where you slowly move through liminal spaces and just sort of get lost in it. There's no jumpscares or anything intense happening, but as a baby with horror this game was tense to go through for me. Honestly I appreciate it's not a more traditional horror game with a monster or something. Just dropped in a space that's inherently unsettling and leaving it up to you to explore.
If you have a free night and want to get lost exploring spaces only games could deliver then play it. It's literally free.
Games Where You Gotta Go Fast:
Distance
This game fucks. I actually remember when playing the first version of this game back when it was a student project. Students at DigiPen made a game called Nitronic Rush and it was (maybe still is?) available to download for free from the schools website. That game fucks and they announced a proper full game called Distance and it was one of the rare instances I actually bought a early access game.
Distance is a car game about going fast as fuck. The levels don't put you against anyone and instead just getting to the end is the challenge in itself. You have a boost that can overheat, a jump, and even wings when needed. The levels will require you to weave in and out of oncoming danger. They have jumps where you'll need to turn the car 90 or 180 degrees to land on a new track. All while giving you a wonderful sense of speed and accomplishment when you pull things off right.
It's not a easy game either and levels will get challenging. There's a ton of levels and challenges and if you get sucked into the gameplay then there's a lot to keep you there. This game seeks to deliver the thrill of going fast in a dangerous track where everything is out to kill you, and making it to the end. There's really not much more to say. It has a specific vision and fully realizes it.
Games Where You Trust the Heart of the Cards:
Foretales:
This game is very unique and nothing quite like what I've played before. The entire game is card based. Each of the characters have their own decks that are all mixed together in your hand. You have 4 resources you can collect, gold, food, fame, and infamy. You can get item cards as well. The board has various location cards you need to move through to move the story along. What's unique about this is the cards can be used in battle or on locations.
It's hard to really go into details how this all works, but you don't have a separate hand or anything for when combat begins.
Some cards have uses in locations and battles and others don't, but there all mixed together which adds to you planning ahead and making the best choice. You can use a eavesdrop card near a guard post to get a juicy secret which can be used for blackmail later. You can forage for food and obviously a forest will give you more then a mine shaft. There's a lot of really cool little interactions and creativity put into this systems that's just to complicated to type out and explain.
One thing I can get into is the best feature of combat. The fact that you can get through it without fighting or with less fighting then needed. Those 4 resources can be used in locations for story or optional reasons, but they can also be used in combat pacify enemies. Bandits can be bribed with gold or food for example. Fame and infamy can be used as well in certain circumstances. They are a constantly growing resource that always have uses. I'm sure it's possible to do a full pacifist run, though I imagine it would be difficult.
The game also has multiple paths for the story to go and lots of optional stuff. Multiple characters to use down the line but only 3 party members so there's more choice as well. Also everyone's an anthropomorphic animal because why not.
I just like how it's a card based game that's not just a battle between opponents or a roguelike or how cards are typically used in video games. If nothing else this game should be played for it's game design alone. If you want a really unique interactive story experience entirely dictated by cards then this is about the only game I know of like it.
One Step From Eden
I'm very bad at this game. So bad I still have never beaten it once. It's really fun all the same though.
It's a deckbuilding roguelike set on a grid. As the formula goes you fight your way through, choosing your path, collecting cards, and seeing if you can win. In my case that's a no.
The game is set on a grid where you have to manage what spells you currently have, dodging enemies, and somehow making sense of the chaos. You can unlock other characters that have their own unique mechanics to help freshen things up. Also the game just throws you in the deep end and lets you learn through playing. No tutorial or anything, just have at it.
If you're itching for a roguelike that's very fucking challenging then enjoy.
Inscryption
This is another game I expect many others to know about, but if not then honestly just play it.
It's a rougelike card game set in a wonderfully crafted creepy setting. You're alone in some mysterious persons shack forced to play a really well designed card game. Of course if it was just that I'd not be recommending it.
The mechanics are well thought out and slowly learning the mechanics feels nice. You will fail, a lot, as is the case for roguelikes, but keep at it. The game is filled with secrets and puzzles and mysteries that you'll just have to figure out for yourself.
Much like with Outer Wilds way back at the top, I don't want to say much more. If you have somehow not played this or don't know anything about it then you should.
Tainted Grail: Conquest
This is still the only proper deck-building roguelike in the same vein as Slay the Spire. While I haven't played much of that and honestly couldn't get into it, this game I did.
It was described to me as Slay the Spire meets Dark Souls by some poor soul who's brain is forever lost in soulslike hell. In reality it's just a cool deck building game where you fight creepy monsters and slowly build up the village to make each run easier. There's characters to find and NPC quest you can make little progressions on each run. It's just enough story and context to give this game a sense or purpose and progression outside collecting cards.
What added more replayability to me beyond the quest was having 9 classes to work with. In truth it's really 3 broad classes with 3 variations on those broader class types. You have the fighter, archer, and summoner as the broad classes. They use similar cards, but their strategies vary with each subclass. A summoner is more about making their summons powerful, bloodmages use their own life to summon minions that get stronger and die on their own, and necromancers sacrifice their minions to turn into a Lich. The fighter and archer subclasses are as varied and it's a good way to use similar cards across different playstyles.
I had a lot of fun with this one. It's a fun deck building game.
Thinking Games:
Manifold Garden:
I love the space this game takes place in. This is the shit only games can truly deliver on. The world is basically always looping. Each level repeats in all directions when your in open space. If you fall anywhere, you'll be ok. You can just fall endlessly even, it's very mesmerising and freeing once you get used to the fact that you can just jump off anywhere, and even needed to solve the level sometimes.
The other fun mechanic the puzzles primarily revolve around is the ability to walk on any surface and change gravity as you do it. Essentially you turn the wall into the new floor and is the main mechanic for puzzles in enclosed spaces. This game uses blocks of various colors and the simple task of putting them in the right slot is made complicated by having to altar gravity and matching them up. There's other mechanics introduced of course, but you'll need to discover those yourself.
The game can be beaten in a day give or take your skill at puzzles. I appreciate that it doesn't overstay it's welcome and uses it's mechanics in interesting ways. Also this reminds me I still need to play Antichamber someday.
If you like exploring spaces only games can deliver on or puzzles then this is the game for you.
FEZ
FEZ! This is such a fun interesting little game. It's probably well known given who the creator is, but if you haven't checked this out before, then you should.
The trailer makes it appear to be more a platformer then a puzzle game and that's half right. Similar to another game on this list, FEZ goes much deeper then a mere platformer. It has some esoteric puzzles. As I understand (could be wrong) one puzzle still hasn't been solved legitimately, but had to be brute forced and even now the community has no concrete answers on how you were supposed to get the solution.
The good news is the harder puzzles aren't technically required to just finish the game. You could still enjoy this as a fun platformer. The way the world works is you see the game world on a 2D plane. Like any other 2D platformer. However, the world itself is in 3D and you can switch the perspective to change where platforms and other things are. It's really fun moving about this world and in a sense each level is it's own puzzle to figure out how to get through it with these mechanics.
I highly recommend this game.
Thinking Games for DJ's
FRACT OSC
This is another game I would be shocked if anyone knew about. No one talks about this game ever and I don't even remember how I found out about it wayyyy back in college. This is also the oldest game on here I've played. I haven't touched this is years, but know I enjoyed it a lot.
What i remember is it's filled with music based puzzles. I also remember being very fucking confused and having to look shit up, but the real joy is just the vibe. Everything makes sound and the whole game revolves around music. I slowly explored as much as I could and just took it all in. It's a fun space to be in and I'm a sucker for being dropped in a unusual place only games can delivery on.
If you don't know shit about music production like me you might have a hard time or maybe I was just a fucking idiot and needed help. Either way I still recommend this to everyone.
Vibing with the Beat Games:
Sayonara Wild Hearts
This is basically a interactive album. It's a rhythm game that's not to difficult, which is good as this is more about the flow and vibe. There's not much more to say about it. It will take an hour and every bit is lovely. It's a visual and auditory feast that has some clever ideas packed in. I think everyone should experience it.
Soundodger+
This game won't be on the Steam store for much longer sadly. Warner Bros being shitty and taking cool shit down. I haven't played any other of the Adult Swim games that are being taken down, but I encourage you to find the list and get anything interesting while you still can.
The game itself is a fun little bullet hell rhythm game. The song plays and you are a circle in the middle of larger circle. Obstacles are thrown out into the middle timed to the music and you simply have to dodged them. I don't remember it being to hard, but I know there are community levels and I just have to assume those are going to be tough.
It's a cool game to vibe to and it's going to be gone soon. Don't miss your chance to get it.
Artsy Games That I Don't Know Where Else To Put Them:
The Beginner's Guide
This a narrative experience about the relationship between the narrator and the game dev who's games are being played. That may not sound like the most interesting premise, but trust me it's very engaging. This game has a unsettling feeling underneath it all and it's really hard to go into more without just spoiling things.
The actual game is you going through a series of small little games made by a Dev named Coda as the narrator Davey speaks to you about various things relating to the game and Coda himself. It's explores a character who's frankly caught up in a unhealthy obsession with someone else and quite the journey.
It will only take a hour and half to get through and I think it's worth a playthrough if you like narratives only video games can deliver on.
The Static Speaks My Name
This is the shortest game on this list. It's also the most depressing. If you struggle with dark thoughts and depression and really need something happy to distract you, then do not play this little free game.
It's a sad and unsettling little experience that has a lot of room for interpretation. I'm a fan of little strange pieces of art like this and if this sounds interesting to you then it's free. Check it out.
Minimalist City Builder Games:
ISLANDERS
This such a cute game. It's a simple city builder where the goal is to keep building things correctly and move on to another island. You start on a randomly generated island and are given a set of buildings and a number to reach. Buildings will get bonuses based on whats near them and as you unlock more buildings the number to reach gets higher.
That's really it. It's easy to understand and a nice little relaxing game about building a cool island town. Pretty cheap and pretty fun.
Multi Genre:
The Hex
This is multi genre because it quite literally has many different gameplay modes packed in it. A bunch of old video game characters stay at a Tavern where a murder may take place. It's a murder mystery! Also so much more.
In truth it's a narrative video game about exploring these characters past lives and revealing a larger narrative underneath it all. This was made by Daniel Mullens who's latest game I recommended earlier. Much like Inscryption, this game slowly draws you into it's setting and drop feeds you it's secrets slowly.
The Hex was pleasantly surprising as I didn't really know what I was getting myself into. It's worth playing.
That's it. That's the list. Over 50 more games to add to your Steam library which means over 50 more games you'll get to, eventually.
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tged webtoon ep 156 spoilers and thoughts below the cut yeah yeah yeah
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I DONT KNOW WHY BUT I THINK THE WAY HE SITS BACK HERE IS REALLY SILLY HEEHEE
also if the panels are slightly blurry uuuuuh no they're not dont worry abt it
ok back to the top bc holy shit this chapter made me crazy again
OF ALL THE CHARACTERS I COULD HAVE EXPECTED A RETURN OF. IT WAS NOT LUPELLAN
HOLY FUCKING SHIT I REALLY THOUGHT WE WERE DONE WITH THAT GUY CAUSE YKNOW. DEAD. BUT HERE WE ARE AHHHH ITS ALL COMING TOGETHER
and ohhh god the restoration of fate kicking in alongside all of this is insane ,, , god it might even happen sooner depending on how quickly they kick their plans into gear ,,, also this guy (forgot his name LMFAO) looks downright terrifying
i wonder how they'll go about it actually,,, especially since alicia has already had a dose of that like, dark magic paranoia poison back when she raided targa's castle. will she be able to combat what their planning,,, do they know she had been poisoned before? probably not, right? ooohhh im so curious to know,,,,,,,
ANYWAY AHH LLOYD AND JAVIER AHHHHHH AAAHHHH
LLOYD GETTING. EMOTIONAL OVER FINALLY BEING CLOSE TO GETTING THE ANSWERS HE NEEDS BUT THEN IMMEDIATELY PUSHING PAST IT GGGHHHRRRRR GGGG IM BITING MY HAND IM BITING MY HAND
he's finally so close . he's so close to being able to permanently protect this place that he loves so dearly . ooohhhghhh hhhhh . he's gotta pursue and continue to the end god im shaking him
AND THEN JAVIER BEING FOND OF HIM
im so sorry i dont have a lot of brilliant things to say im just. KICKING MY FEET ROLLING ON THE FLOOR IM. AAAHHHH my singular Analysis braincell hasn't kicked in yet sorry
sorry okay if i just post panels and scream i wont actually get anywhere but i REALLY liked the oneliners/jokes in this episode specifically got me giggling my ass off
AND LLOYD BEING A FUCKING SCHEMER TOO YOU ASSHOLE /AFF
TOP TIER ACTOR WHAT THE HELLL HAHAHAHA HIS SMUG ASS FACE
i remember seeing a post on twt about the episode preview and it was this left frame of lloyd crying and i was like "WTF FULLY EMOTIONAL MOMENT WITH LLOYD??" BUT NO ITS JUST HIM BEING CONNIVING AS USUAL LMAO
and javier's reaction HAHAHAHAHAHAA
OH ANDNDD AND AND MY FAV PART OF THIS EP
shaking crying at the way they look at each other oh my god . javier fully understanding lloyd . that the outcome lloyd wants isnt just one that benefits himself or the estate, but one that satisfies everyone,,, theyre on the same page they want the same thing a good ending for everyone they love im gonna lose my fucking MARBLES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THE PROTAGONISTS EVERRRRRRRRRRRRRR
AND AND ANDD THE CALLUSES ON LLOYDS HANDS. IM. SHAKING CRYING AND JAVIER'S EXPRESSION AT HIS HANDS AAHHH AAA
lloyd saying this n that about being pragmatic and yet there's this blatant fucking evidence that he's been working so hard and so long for the most idealistic, best results for the people he cares about and the people he comes across no matter what . "pragmatic" and he's going about things in a long, constructive and taxing process all so that he can fight fate while also saving people instead of realistically accepting the permanence of it . this is so poorly worded but i hope u understand HOW INSANE THIS MAKES MEEE and javier catches this for sure the fucker im shaking him
AND THEIR GOD DAMN HIGH FIVE. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
"business relationship" I THINK NOT! Y'ALL HIGH FIVE'D!!! AAHHAFDLKJSDFHAHHAHAHAHAHA IM GONNA THROW UP /POS
THIS MADE ME SO FUCKING EMOTIONAL FOR SOME REASON I. GHGHGHHGHGHGHGHH the first high five they share im gonna fall apart into ten billion pieces
i said this on twt but like. if anyone suggests a high five irl i think i'm actually gonna just bawl in front of them i'm so serious llovier is a fucking plague
and their second one about the hellgate was really cute/funny LMFAOOO
this ep had me giggling and wiggling around like a fucking millipede i loved this so much HEHEHEHE
i think this is just abt the beginning of the end of the truth jewel arcs,,, god i wonder what the jewel will say!!! PRAYING that it says fate can be fought bc if it says "lol nah u cant" the devastation and anguish that would follow would be INSANE i wouldnt be able to take it. id stop reading right then and there /j
AND LUPELLAN AND THAT OTHER GUY WHAT ARE THEY GONNA DO TO ALICIA OH GODDDD
anyway that's all for now ,,,, i will see u next week, ,,,, or whenever i make my next shitpost,,,,!!!! end post!!!!!!!!!!
#tged#the greatest estate developer#tged spoilers#lynn misc#man i was giggling like a fucking maniac while i was reading this ep#blessed be my family for not asking me about it xd#like how do i explain that the reason im cackling so much is bc my fav characters smiled at each other and then high fived .#like what would i even say to explain why that feels significant to me to ppl who havent read tged#im sure someone else here in the fandom could pull it off... not me tho im verbally useless
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i just beat the last campfire

there were multiple campfires, what the hell
ive never played no mans sky, but i think its a good litmus test for what "counts" as an indie game or not. like theres always going to be a spectrum to it, with some people on one extreme of "you have to be a self-published solo dev" and "super mario for the nes is an indie game", but HG is such a weird circumstance. to recap: its 2013, four buddies get together to make a funny motorcycle game, and then they move on to an ambitious space-exploration game. then sony gets the publishing rights and starts building a stupid amount of hype for it. in the same year that had persona 5, overwatch, and final fantasy 9, i distinctly remember nms having the most hype behind it. personally, i think it still counts as an indie game, since from what i can tell sony only really covered the marketing and HG covered all the design and creation. i mean, its not like ori or dust an elysian tale are AAA just because its published by xbox.
i think part of the reason the question makes people hesitate is that nms doesnt feel like an indie game. its huge in scope and ambition, especially with all the expansions. the design and the gameplay all fits squarely into my schema of AAA even though its an indie under the hood
the last campfire? this is a fuckin indie game
i admit its vibes based, but lets be real, most labels are. tomatos are berries but like, no theyre not, theyre vegatables because you cook them the same way you cook other vegatables, and eating them like youd eat other fruit would be weird. so nms is kinda like a tomato, where its scientifically (in my opinion) an indie game, even though operationally its AAA. but campfire's a blueberry, this is just what you expect when you think about what a fruit is. its not trying to be a huge new attention grabbing spectacle, its just a reasonably scoped little toy for you to play with
i liked the cute storybook presentation. it really felt like the game was leaning into its limitations as a relatively simple puzzle game, mechanically speaking, and incorperating the simplicity to feel like a children's story. like, when i think of indie puzzle games, i think of weird experimental shit like baba is you and patrick's parabox. the wackiest campfire gets is like, the metal-kinesis from breath of the wild. its a fun, solid mechanic to build puzzles around and i feel like the game does a great job of designing setpieces to encourage you to use it in creative but intuitive ways. like, something that irks me about talos principle is how a lot of puzzles rely on obfuscating mechanics from the player in a way that i find dishonest, but campfire feels like its leaving more of its cards on the table about what you can and cant expect to do. is it easy? very, but its not trying to be challenging to hardcore gamers like me. so judging it on its own merits and what its aiming for, i can say it does a great job of making simple but engaging puzzles that wont really stump you but are still fun to work through
theres also the additional challenge of the secret notebook pages. from what i can tell, every screen in the game has a hidden chest somewhere where you can get a little page of text, either a hint thing or just a general atmospheric statement. i found 29/42 of these without using a guide, and since there isnt an achievement for them i feel comfortable leaving it that way. that said, i did have a lot of fun looking through everywhere and sometimes finding a little chest as a reward. a lot of theme were just kinda... hidden out of sight, but equally as many were behind quick little puzzles!
i bought this game on sale for two dollars canadian and beat it in a cumulative afternoon. its kinda hard not to recommend it then, huh? if you dont like it its not like youre hung out or anything. it should be on sale when i post this, so go ahead and give it a shot! even if you dont like puzzle games, the general approachability and the fact that it doesnt make you do ALL the puzzles means its an excellent starting point
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Hey there! You're a very inspirational person to me and one of the reasons why I realized that art is my true passion unlike all of the other professions i convinced myself to like because they're more "profitable". So I'm now seeking to enter an art college once I finish high school, but in my country it's a little hard for me to find anything "eye-catching".
I'm going to apply for a visual arts course next year in a very popular public school here in my country for preparation (the applications are only at the end of the year and i didn't apply for anything last year), but I'm still a little worried about finding a good art college, specially since art is very undervalued in my country (maybe it will change bc of the new president, hopefully), but i was very interested in the weekly schedule you posted of your art school last year, since it's pretty much everything I wanna learn in my art journey, so I'd like to know if you have any tips on finding a good college? There are quite a lot of art colleges here but I find it hard to find something that fits what I want,,,
very long reply
hi ! first of all i'm super glad that i can be such an inspiration to you aa ^_^
second of all, i don't really know how colleges work for you but for me i made sure of 3 things to choose mine.
first is the teaching, art colleges are very different from each other because art is a very vast and each college has a speciality so choose wisely depending on what you want to do.
second is the diploma, idk how it works for you but here some diplomas are certified by the state (means they recognize you has a student etc) here certified diplomas can help you find a job and its easier to change job all that. Honestly in the art industry the school you did isn't that important (ofc it's always better to have a prestigious school on your resume but) your portfolio is really what's gonna show your work and this is what employers are gonna look at !
third is the cost, here we have free or paid colleges, either free or not art studies cost A LOT, all artistic material is expensive traditional or digital (especially digital) if you can't afford everything they are some solutions (second hand material, adobe cracks etc) just please make sure you don't put yourself in too much debt because art is still a job that doesn't pay much at first (especially if you go on freelance)
and lastly, ask your college it's employment rates, in my college for example, big studios directly come to recruit some people, they're the judges for our final exams etc, make sure your college has connections with the working world because as fun as it sounds at the end of the day you're looking for a job !!
bonus, ask old students from the college and ask about their experiences, here we have special conventions where college show what they do and you can meet people (YOU DONT WANT A COLLEGE WITH WEIRD PEOPLE!!! especially if you're a girl and you want to go in video games like me, i got asked my number and to go get a drink by some dumbass and let me tell you i did not choose to go to this college, students reflects what the reputation of their school and you don't want to go to a place full of dumbasses)
i also really recommend you visit the colleges you're interested in !
bonus bonus, art studies takes a lot on your mental health, there's a real difference between drawing as a hobby and doing art for a living, but i think you already thought about that so all i have to say is good luck !
that was long aaa i hope i didnt discouraged you too much, it took me a while to find my college too but once you're in you're good !!
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Do you have any opinions on the Cyberpunk 2077 launch?
The writing was on the wall when they announced the delay after going gold. The warning signs were already there before then - CDPR is fairly well-known in the industry for their sweatshop working conditions and pay, the game had been in development since the PS3/X360 console generation, and there had been multiple delays - but the post-gold delay really confirmed that it was going to be a hot, buggy mess. So let’s talk about it for a moment.
First, Cyberpunk’s extremely long development cycle basically meant that the leadership couldn’t figure out what they wanted the game to be for a very long time. Nobody plans to take eight years to build a game - the video game market changes and evolves way too quickly for that to happen. When Cyberpunk was announced, League of Legends hadn’t hit its peak yet and everybody was starting to fall off of the big AAA MMOG boom. Hearthstone didn’t exist. Fortnite didn’t exist. Players were all super excited to play COD: BLOPS 2. Having a dev cycle take longer than 4 years generally means the dev team wasted a lot of time building things, discovering they didn’t work, and then throwing them out. The finished Cyberpunk isn’t the sum of eight years of work, it’s the sum of maybe three years of work and five additional years of cut systems and content.
Second, CDPR is already known in the industry for their brutal working conditions. They’re a crunch culture studio and there have been confirmations from one of the devs on Cyberpunk that they’ve been crunching on it since at least June of 2019 despite public assurances that it wasn’t mandatory. These kind of working conditions are nothing new; they did it for the Witcher 3, they did it for the Witcher 2, and there’s no reason to think they won’t continue in the future since it clearly continues to work for them. Unfortunately, the effect of the exhausted dev team gets multiplied by the systemic effects of delaying the game as well.
Finally, Cyberpunk was also delayed several times - in January, then in June, then again in November. Delays are never planned into the schedule - they are responses to shit hitting the fan. They only occur when the producers realize that there is no way that they’ll be able to hit their target that they delay the game. There are several reasons for this, primarily budgetary - changing release dates greatly affects the marketing campaign, business deals, as well as the overall development cost of the game. Thus, delays are usually a last resort - the added time is the minimum estimated time to reach the goal by crunching super hard to get past the finish line. The fact that they had to delay three separate times meant that they blew their estimates and schedules three times and had to course-correct each time. This is why the effect of the death march crunch mentioned previously gets multiplied - the devs have already been on a year-long deathmarch crunch and are exhausted, causing their work to suffer. Delaying on top of that means that their work will continue to suffer.
Cyberpunk is the result of multiple contributing factors - years in development hell, a brutal sweatshop studio culture, and all exacerbated by pivoting due to delays changing the schedule. It is the result of bad planning multiplied by developer exhaustion, compounded by sudden scope and schedule changes. All of the warning signs were already there if you knew where to look. I actually would have been very surprised if this wasn’t the resultant state of Cyberpunk at launch.
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♦ Anon asked ~ Okay how would guys and their darling react to being slapped by Eliza? Feel free to write for any of those who got slapped ^^ Gender is neutral
Aaa this one was really sweet so I did it for all guys (who got slapped-)
I reached my 10 pic limit and had to sacrifice twins ixkskxksos
[note : re-posted his because my tags weren't working]
♦♥♠♣

Poor boy remained silent for a few minutes after that mess with ghost princess , still unable to talk
His cheeks are flushed that proved him being embarrassed , making him look greatly...cute
Just as much as you loved seeing softer sides of him you can't see him this sad , so now it is your responsibility to lift him up
He is upset with both failing to help and being an idiot in front of Eliza
The whole thing proved how soft he can actually be , which fascinated you . You hadn't ever thought of him being like this ; shy and... helplessly childish with girls
Deuce is a bit worried with the way you see him now , he doesn't want his picture ruined . But as a matter of fact you like him even more now , he could be serious and strict at times but still , he's a soft boy inside
You ask if he feels any shy around you and it makes him turn his head away to add a nervous : " M...me? Absolutely not- why would I .??"
You now know that he actually does but it isn't something he needs to hide , that actually makes him look awfully cute
He still seems sad though so you give him a small kiss on forehead , making him blush even harder
Well even if he's shy with you you aren't ; after all he is your boy

Trey himself couldn't help laughing at what had happened. He tried his best to be a gentleman , and he really was . But seems like Eliza had more different standards than he was expecting
Trey's mind just wasn't ready to go from his normal self to a high-level prince , but he doesn't find singing a part of a prince's duties either
"My my , it really messed up," he says as he joins you and the others in the losers' bench
You knew that the proposal was all fake , but Trey just wasn't one who could act it all ; he didn't have Vil's pure talent of an actor or Leona's charm of a prince , yet he did his very best
You tell that you really liked the way he presented himself , pretty much of a mature young man he really is and he gets blessed . He isn't much of a romantic guy and he appreciates that you like him as he is
You give him a "Ghost bride surely lost a great option , " to lift him up and it did , making him wink adding : " Well, perhaps she knew that I have a better one myself ,"

Finally after posting 34 pics of his slapped face along with other supplies such as his fake tears , dead flowers and some broken-hearted captions with tons of #Ghostbride #Puishmentoflove #illfate #brokenheart and and and you managed to have him looking off his phone for a second
You tell how he's making an issue out of nothing but he'll just laugh : " Who cares that it's all fake ? Teens are gonna love it ! ,"
He must be thankful that Eliza didn't see this part pf him or he should've spammed pics of his broken legs and hands instead
He takes the best advantage of being slapped and you wonder how he's just being all excited about it , what if the same thing happens while he's seriously proposing to someone ?
You ask if it bothers him , the feeling of being rejected and he goes silent for a moment not looking at his phone but the ground now , perhaps thinking of an logical answer
You drop your head regretting what you asked and then , he cuts you off with a small kiss on your cheek : " That's simple , my dear (y/n). Not a single soul likes being rejected no matter what the reason is , so that's why I always make sure that I won't get rejected before asking ; today was just an exception ,"
You get a bit confused at the answer , wanting him to give you an example
He slightly smirks before adding :" Well , you didn't reject me , did you ?"

For the heaven's sake ; you couldn't be any more thankful that he got rejected . From the very moment they announced that princess was looking for a prince you feared of her picking Leona , a real prince
Leona is already prince charming of his home town ; Not a single soul could say no to him
The second he got slapped , his eyes - You were trying to feel sorry about it but the way he glared at Eliza as if he was a chubby cat pushed into water ; it was beyond hilarious
Leona has his own ways when it comes to attracting ladies , making him almost irresistible to many including you , but not the ghost bride
He seems really pissed off at the whole thing ; not that he liked the ghost bride that much , he just hates being rejected
With him being a growling cat for the rest of day , you decide to spoil him a little ; letting him take naps on your lap and rubbing back of his ears make him a whole lot better , but he won't say a word of satisfaction
You are used to his cringy behaviors and can't help loving them , you are really thankful that your cat would still be all yours - even if it was supposed to be a fake marriage

He just - Froze
Sword skills ? Were they a thing he lacked ? Was it just one of those royal fancy rules or could it be a serious problem ? He now was concerned
You found him getting slapped pretty unfair since not many these days are familiar with sword skills ; but there were no argues on that point since Eliza once lived as a girl from more than 500 years ago , so she surely ends up having more complicated standards comparing to you
You tell Jack about it and that it's fine , but he refuses to believe
He had heard of Sebek together with Silver being well-trained sword men which meant that this tradition still remained necessary , so he now is seriously thinking about picking it up
You couldn't blame him though , once he feels like he needs to be stronger that's it ; but you don't want him overwork himself
You insist that sword skills are pretty silly to him while he's got his powerful fists and the secret unleash the beast , but he still seems to have a doubt about it
Since he looks pretty certain with his choice , you don't try to stop him but you make promise that he wouldn't overwork himself , which he does
He intends to get stronger to protect his beloved ones , including you so there was nothing that could hold him back if it was because of you

♦♥♠♣ Jade Leech
Jade still doesn't get why Eliza didn't like the flowers , yes he didn't like them either but aren't flowers ladies' most appreciated gift ? How confusing , he thought
You slap the ice-pack against his face , just who on earth would give away unwanted flowers from his terrarium as a bouquet ?
Jade doesn't get why he shouldn't have , he was benefitting both himself and Eliza , right ? Or could that be that surface girls followed different romance traditions from underwater ? He needed more information then
He asks for ways to make a girl fall in love , which made you laugh , you told that if he's going to retry the thing with Eliza , he would end up needing way more than one ice-pack
He agrees with you on that point , so he wonders if he can practice tactics with you since you are a pretty gentle and calm partner , and it makes you blush
You tell him to focus on not being slapped again as long as this ghost marriage lasts and in return , you then can teach him some tricks with ladies
♦♥♠♣ Floyd Leech
He didn't really like Eliza from the very beginning so there was no way the two of them would end up together even if he wasn't slapped
Floyd isn't into this type of girls which are too strict and loud ; he prefers softer and cuter types , something he can dominant
You expect him to get moody and pissed off , but he just doesn't seem to care
thanks to him Jade as well got slapped -very hard- and that successfully lifted his mood up
You ask him if he wants to take a walk and he agrees in deal of you paying for his candy , and you gladly agree
The two of you have candies together and make fun of others getting slapped back there
Both of you agree on Jade's expression being way more hilarious than Azul's
When you finally get back to others trying to find a way , he whispers into your ears : " If I ever were to propose to someone , I'd prefer it to be to someone like you"~

Man , he's really pissed off. Talking too much will usually be beneficial while dealing on a contract , mostly because of the way it confuses dealers and gives them an unconscious vibe causing them to believe you ; strange yet helpful
Azul hadn't thought of proposing being this different from making contracts , and it was odd to him
He now is supposed to be looking for a way to save his boardgames club friend , but another thought keeps haunting him :
What are the correct ways of... making someone fall for you ? To attract a lady ? Isn't having a good face and using sweet words like enough ? He needed more lessons if he wanted to be an ideal dealer
You sigh as his serious replies , disappointed to see how he really had no idea about emotional terms
You tell him how life isn't always about business and benefitting , but sometimes about feelings and well , loving
He mumbles saying how useless emotions are , a waste of time and brain cells to him
You suggest teaching him more about emotional situations which may be helpful , and charming to others , which sounds like a great deal to him , but he doesn't accept you giving it to him for free, saying that you as well must set a price
You aren't really sure what to ask , so you just want him to invite you to a fancy dinner after having this case with the ghost bride solved

Just as you hear the sound of him getting slapped , you know that it was bad news
Vil is trying his best to be calm but...it doesn't really seem to be working . His fist's shaking in anger as if he's gonna slam it against the wall or maybe someone . He got rejected and he couldn't take it ; he
wasn't one to accept such a thing
Although he isn't a real prince , he had anything needed to be a real one : Elegance , Charm , Nobility and maturity ; he was perfect
He is really furious now , specially thinking at how Lilia intended to avoid Malleus from showing up in fear of his high chance of being accepted . He wasn't one to say that he would surpass Malleus , but he wasn't any lower than him either: if a dog was the only reason he got rejected then Malleus as well would've been...but wait- doesn't it mean that Idia too shouldn't have been chosen since he loves cats ?
In that case..it must've had another reason : He wasn't good enough
You knew that Vil would never be satisfied no matter how many times you told him that he was already gorgeous , he wanted to be better
It was useless trying to take his mind away from being rejected through the same ways so you had to sacrifice yourself :
You go to Vil asking is he can join you for a second -until others get slapped try to propose because you are having some... beauty issues
You try to get him talking to you as much as possible ,from importance of having an organized sleep schedule to forbidding laughing too much since it will bring you wrinkles
You know that if there's one thing that Vil would always be proud of , that would be speaking of his high-key beauty skills which he couldn't ever get enough of
He could go on all day if Leona didn't cut him off : " Oi , aren't the two of you done yet ?"
Even with Leona pissing him off , he now seems to be a lot better and that was a success for you . Even if he doesn't notice how you were trying to secretly lift his mood up

Lilia is...crying ?
Your heart melts at the sight of his soft tears falling down his pale face , making you as well cry
You don't know why you are being overly emotional but who on earth would slap others because just because of being too cute ?!
You can't help but to be mad at Eliza , wanting to punch her in the face just as she did to Lilia , but Lilia stops you , wondering why you might want to do such a thing
You angrily express how unfair you think what she did was , telling that she shouldn't be treaten las if she has the right to do whatever she'd like
"Just HOW is cuteness considered to be a bad thing ?!" you argue , loud enough to gain attention to yourself . Lilia takes you out before Eliza could've heard
He then sits beside you , trying to see what could've been wrong with you ; were you sick or just in a bad mood maybe ? He couldn't tell
" I'm sorry I just , got really mad with what she did and after you cried..." you mumble slowly , making Lilia giggle
" My my darling , I wasn't the only one who got slapped and also , I just cried at how my whole presentation keeps getting ruined by my... appreance . You know , it's a bit frustrating to be called cute after living hundreds of years as a terrifying dark fae ," he says , shaking his head in a playful manner
You are relieved knowing that he wasn't crying of pain or being heartbroken , and now he as well seems to be better
He asks of you're ready to return inside and you quickly agree , admitting that you might have been a bit too emotional
Just before you two get to others , he brings himself closer to ask you something : " You as well agree that I'm cute , don't you ?"

"How dare she- I see now why master Lilia didn't let master Draconia approach - this disgraceful spirits don't deserve having the slightest sight of him..."and and and were the words you keeped up with untill you grew tired which was 20 minutes later . You really wish him to have a turn off button sometimes
Sebek feels really offended specially because he was just about to get to the best part of his speech about Malleus but got slapped in face
The sight of his mouth getting shut as Eliza slapped him was priceless , perhaps she and Malleus were the only ones who had ever got to shut his mouth
When he finally cools down , his puppy side is brought up : " (y/n) , maybe I didn't present myself good enough in front of her and caused her to take young master lightly . Is it my fault ? "
You keep telling him that Eliza just didn't like how he brought Malleus out of nowhere and started to ramble nonsense about him when he was supposed to be proposing
Sebek doesn't take your comment as a polite one at first , bit he had to agree , maybe it would have worked out for her if this ghost knew who the great Malleus Draconia is and that was why it all went wrong
You sigh at how he doesn't get your point at all but you don't say a word , he deeply appreciated Malleus after all ; Thought Malleus had to be removed surgically from him
Since he doesn't seem to be giving up , you say that you'd really like to hear that best part about Malleus , making him flatter and start talking like a parrot again
You don't really care what he says or how great Malleus can actually be , but if that's what makes him happy you are fine with it
#twst#twisted wonderland#Deuce Spade#Trey Clover#Cater Diamond#Azul Ashengrotto#jade leech#Floyd Leech#leona kingscholar#Jack Howl#Vil Schoenheit#Malleus Draconia#Lilia Vanrouge#Sebek Zigvolt#Twst x reader#twisted wonderland x reader#Deuce Spade x reader#Trey Clover x reader#Cater Diamond x reader#Azul Ashengrotto x reader#Jade leech x reader#floyd leech x reader#leona kigscholar x reader#Jack Howl x reader#Vil Schoenheit x reader#Lilia Vanrouge x reader#Sebek Zigvolt x reader#twisted wonderland imagines#Ghost marriage
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Would you do a more in depth analysis about Quackity’s dialogue during the lore 👀
Because that sounds really really interesting
AAA HELLO OF COURSE
ok so my original post was just me trynna be funny BUT quackity is my absolute favourite character and his dialogue in the last lore stream was very interesting so lets get into it !!
ok so back to my original point about debaters/law students: i've had many cases and rounds where i didn't know what the hell i was talking about, barely any knowledge on the topic, and the arguments were all half-assed and vague and i've still won with the power of over-confidence.
c!quackity is a man who has learned how to speak with meaning even if there's no meaning behind his word at all. the art of the bluff, if you will. and of course we all know that he's a master manipulator and orator but the reason this struck me so hard is because of the slow change of c!quackity's dialogue throughout s1, s2, and now s3. he's still very much so a smart and silver-tongued man, but now it feels like he knows how to take aim with his words instead of just speaking, if that makes sense?
i hate to bring up debate again but as a prospective future law student and someone who has won far too many debates simply by acting like the smartest and most confident person in the room despite being neither of those things, c!quackity's dialogue and the way he speaks just feels so much like he's grasping at straws even when he has no reason to.
bearing in mind that c!quackity is a character who has lost so much. he's been killed, betrayed, overlooked, undermined and forgotten. he is the broken shell of the person he was when he first joined, and the server hasn't been kind to him. las nevadas itself is beautiful and will be a force to be reckoned with in the future, a strong nation, but at its core it is the same as its creator: empty and cold. there are no memories, no sentiment. c!quackity has learned to treat life like a business deal, with words and swords, and his every action shows that he's not backing away from this path anytime soon.
when he tells foolish that his build is worth only a diamond, brings up foolish's past and tells him he's nothing. when he destroys the only thing purpled has built on the server, proving above and beyond that purpled will be forgotten in history. when he tells sam, reassuring, "we're the good guys, sam." when he calls fundy his old friend, lures him into a sense of false comfort.
the similarity in all of those is that c!quackity has figured out what makes these people tick. what makes them stay up at night, thinking about their life choices. he knows this because he has been through it. quackity's recent dialogue just further proves to me that despite all his talk about being powerful and whatnot is just as much him trying to convince himself as it is him trying to convince others.
sure, he has had actual change (and good on him. i live for villain arcs) but for me that doesnt negate the fact that everytime he speaks to anyone, especially in the past few lore streams. it always makes me feel like im back in the debate room listening to an opponent talk literal garbage and get away with it because of phrasing, or confidence. to be able to state matter-of-factly to anyones face that they're forgettable, their work is worth nearly nothing, that they are in the right even when everyone in that room knows they're not, is an art and c!quackity has finally learned to master that art to perfection.
tl;dr: i have no idea how this got so long and i wish i could have quotes his dialogue a bit more but i dont have a transcript and i dont have the energy to go through the vod again so yeah . it's very fun to imagine quackity as some desperate law student grasping for strings to bring a case around, especially because he and i have somewhat similar argument tactics . hope this wasn't too long-winded to read !!
#quackity#dsmp#dream smp#dsmp lore#mcyt#awesamdude#purpled#foolish#fundy#c!quackity#cc!quackity#c!quackity critical#rant#character analysis#quackity being a law student and being part of a previously shitty government is just even funnier#in conclusion: quackity debater arc so true#also his manipulation of dream#that was interesting#very op tactics#dreamwastaken#las nevadas#karlnapity neg#kinda#debate#man schlatt really did a number on my poor lil duck man :(#yet another reason to hate schlatt#very long rant#please forgive me
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I’m going to start this by saying, I have bias. Everyone does. I do not intend for this to come off as “the thing you like is bad”, but moreso “the corporation that controls the thing you like is manipulative”.
My background; I am a 26 year old trans mom, I have a history with addiction, particularly gambling, and spend most of my time playing video games. I have gone to college for about 3 years for my psychology degree, and while I do not have my degree, I have been studying psychology for roughly 12 years. This is to say, my views will reflect this background. Just because I present this information like I do, does not inherently mean I’m right, though it also doesn’t mean I’m wrong. Try to view things with a critical mind, and know that most topics have nuance.
Ok, so lootboxes, booster packs, gacha games, all of these are gambling. This is not really an argument. You are putting money into a service of sorts, and receiving a randomized result. Be that a fancy new gun, that same boring legendary you have 5 of, or that final hero you’ve been trying to collect. You don’t know the outcome before you give your money. As defined by the merriam-webster dictionary: “Gambling; the practice of risking money or other stakes in a game or bet”
You are risking your money in not getting an item you want. There are ways this is handled acceptably, and ways this is handled poorly. Gambling is also illegal to people under 21 in a lot of places, but places online aren’t quick to tell you why. I don’t have any sources because every source requires a paywall to get any information, but pulling from my own personal experience and what I learned in college, it’s because children are very impressionable. I say “I like pokemon” and suddenly my 2-year old can’t go anywhere without her pikachu. I remember distinctly playing poker with my mom and her friends when I was 12. When you normalize gambling, what it does is lower the risk aversion of gambling. You are less likely to see a threat in playing that card game, because when you are that young you have no concept of money. You don’t know what a dollar is, so why not throw it away so you can have fun. This is...I hesitate to call it fine, but it’s mostly harmless. The issue is with children and their lack of knowledge of money. When I grew up and got a job, it’s a lot harder to tell my brain, “hey, don’t spend that money, you won’t get it back and you won’t get what you want.” Because my brain just acknowledges the potential for what I want. I want to buy the booster pack so I can have the potential to get that masterpiece misty rainforest. I want to buy that diamond pack so I have the chance to get the cute hero. I want to buy that lootbox so I can get the battle rifle that does a cool effect. These are harmless concepts, but very dangerous.
Make no mistake, companies know how psychology works, and will use it to their advantage. MatPat from game theory states that companies have even go so far as to have systems in place that change the odds as you’re losing, and monitor your skill level to put you up against harder opponents, to see the better weapons and go, “Oh I want that!” and entice you to buy more lootboxes. As it turns out I found an article covering what he was talking about, Activision had actually acquired a patent to arrange matchmaking to do just that [x], and the article says it’s not in place, but my trust in companies is not high enough to actually believe them.(honestly, matpat made a 2-part video series about lootboxes, and I’d recommend watching them)
So, companies are trying to manipulate you to buy more gambling products. There’s proof of it. It’s also more blatantly obvious in games like Magic the Gathering, where they release fancier versions of cards at rarer probabilities. To better explain it, from a collector’s standpoint, you want the fancy card cause it has value, it has value because it’s rare, rarer than the other versions, so if you’re on the lower end of the income ladder you buy a pack, or two. After all, you could get lucky and get it. On the higher end of the income ladder, you buy the card outright and hoard it. Maybe sell it off later if you notice the price goes down. From a player perspective, you see a card is being used by tournament players, you want to win more games, so you want those cards, which encourages you to buy products and try to get those cards. That’s predatory behavior. It’s predatory from the company’s perspective because that poor person might not be able to afford the card outright, but $5-$10 isn’t much, plus they always entice you with that Chance. They also further this desire for the cards by making it limited runs, such as the secret lair packs, if there’s a low amount purchased and it’s made to order, or worse, if they limit the order capabilities themselves, that drives up the value, and provides further incentive to buy the cards and packs. This not only creates an impossible barrier between the poor and the rich, but also heavily encourages people buy their gambling pack than people would have in other conditions.
For the record, I love magic the gathering, I’m not saying the game itself is bad, this is just a VERY predatory marketing tactic.
Let’s switch gears. Gacha games. I play AFKArena, because like I said, I have a gambling addiction and cannot stop myself. In AFKArena, you collect heroes, and battle with them in various ways. If you collect more of similar heroes you can rank them up. If I’m to believe what I’ve heard, it sounds like this is pretty common for gacha games. So what makes it bad. In AFKArena you use diamonds to summon heroes, now, you can acquire diamonds by beating specific story chapters, logging in every day, random limited time events, or paying for them with real money. AFKArena hero drops don’t seem that bad compared to the free diamond amount they dish out, which has resulted in me not spending all that much money on it, all things considered ($20 over 2 years). I believe that for a mobile game like this, that’s fair. I get way more enjoyment out of the game than I do most $60 games, so it balances out. However, this isn’t the case for every gacha game, and my trust in companies, as previously stated, is very low. The issue lies in them making the rates for good heroes so low that you HAVE to spend money on the game to really get over a roadblock of sorts. I do think that there is this issue in my game and I just didn’t notice it, someone with a lower tolerance or patience might absolutely have the incentive to drop hundreds of dollars on the game over a month. There are people of all different flavours, and it’s important to keep that in mind when discussing these topics, just because a marketing technique doesn’t work on you, does not mean it doesn’t work on anyone. After all, they have those $100 packs for a reason, you might not be that reason but someone is. That’s predatory.
I feel like I’ve gotten off track, let’s get back on the rails. Where was...gambling...predatory…ah, kids. So my biggest issue, is that Magic the Gathering is marketed towards 13 year olds. Not directly, but the packs say 13+. AFKArena and any mobile game for that matter, can be downloaded by anyone with a phone for free, with minimal mention that there’s microtransactions. AAA title games like Destiny 2, Overwatch, Fortnite, etc. are probably the worst offenders. A kid spent $16,000 of his parents money on fortnite in-game purchases, and that’s not the only time this has happened [x] [x] . More often than not, what happens is, the kid wants to play a video game, like halo on xbox, or destiny, or something, they ask their mom for their credit card, and the system saves it. I mentioned before that kids do not have a concept of money or its value, so giving kids unlimited access to the credit card is going to result in this kind of thing happening. I’m not blaming the parents for not being hypervigilant, sometimes you are really busy, or disabled, or whatever the reason, and you don’t notice the system just saved your card. I’m not blaming the kids cause their brains are literally underdeveloped. I blame the corporations, because they make the process as easy as possible to prey on kids and people with gambling addictions. (as a personal anecdote, I found that if I want a magic card in MtG:O, I’m way less likely to try and buy it if I have to get up and get my card, I’d recommend not saving your card if you suffer from gambling/addiction problems)
So after all of this evidence, how can anyone still view these things as anything but predatory? The answer is simple. You’re told they aren’t. Businesses spend hundreds of thousands of dollars on really good marketing, and public relations. I tried to google why gambling is illegal for people under 21, and got nothing, I got a couple forums asking the question, and a couple religious sites saying it’ll make them degenerates. I try looking up sources to prove the psychology behind these concepts, but they are locked behind paywall after paywall after paywall. Businesses and capitalism has made it so incredibly hard to discover the truth and get information you need, and it’s on purpose. They want you to trust that that booster pack is a good idea. They want you to spend money on lootboxes (look at all the youtubers that shill out for raid shadow legends, or other gambling games to their super young fanbase [x]). They want you to lower your guard and go, “well, it’s a video game, how can it be predatory?” “it’s a card game with cute creatures on it, surely it’s not that bad”
But it is. So why did I make this post? I dunno, my brain really latched onto the topic, I see so many people enjoying gacha games, but I’m worried that it’s going to ruin lives...I just want everyone to be informed and critical of what is going on.
#gambling addiction tw#addiction tw#this is probably a bad idea to post knowing how this site operates#but it matters to me
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hello. bestie. info about this fantasy au WHEN 👀👀👀👀👀
Aaa I can give you some right now!!!! For some reason this au comes to me whenever im working so thats why its art is all on stickynotes audjskjsj
BUT ANYWAYS uh. No better way to say this but it all started out with a modded skyrim character creator that i made skull in! I thought it was cool and going thru both main q and whatever stupid civil war to skip the broken seasons unending quest is annoyin but fun was had for maybe some hours
But! I had to make skull twice due to the first skull files getting corrupted. So that has a piece to it
But anyways context over and now this au has been in my brain with only vague skrim assets because i fucking hate that that civil war has anything to do with anything of the main questline it can FUCK. Right off
Basic storyline premise my brain had! We start out with a currently human vintage caught between a mysteriously similar civil war :) he's chosen neither side but since his home was destroyed by the stupid shit idiot war he's basically gotten really good at pissing off both sides. Sometimes he gets caught! And the good-ish soldiers will see that he is you know a still kinda baby-side teen full of anger and try to lrt him go with a talking to. But his worst encounter would be when the angy soldiers catch him and beat him up, which just deepens his hatred. And one time someone really messed him up bad!
He ends up limping away into an enchanted forest and drawn by a really good smell, he passes out just in front of this really beautiful lilac tree that was in a clearing like "ok this is a nice tree to die by. Peaceful" but ofc he didnt die. He just woke up to a nymph of the tree he chose taking him up to the center of the tree. And that's how he befriends Skull, he's recovering with him and keeps mumbling about how nice the smell is while skull both cares for him and looks around for his potion savvy friend. Once vin is healed up by aviators he realizes pretty quick that this forest is very much between the war path and figures it's highly appropriate to set traps all over!!! But ofc giving avi and skull very specific instructions on how to avoid the things he sets. He also makes good pals with omega in the town nearby bc she helps at an institude and she's been sneaking him into their library to read up on nymphs and share his own notes in return. Shes like you're my little brother and hes like fuck u (but also thank you sorry) and he gets to discover he has a high affinity for magic despite being human. Weird! Anyways now that he has a place of study he can figure out how to teach skull weapons.
But all is not peaceful for long, bc some old shitty wizard trails this knowledgeable little jerkwad, because variant nymphs are rare! And as the guy comes out of the bushes and pisses vintage off by treating skull like a specimen and taking out a pair of scissors like, "i wonder if its really true that you can take memories of one by severing branches from its tree:)" Vintage basically attacks the guy! Because no taking Skull's memories! And skull helps of course bc friend, but unfortunately this guy is very strong and seasoned. So when vintage almost gets a good life ending hit, the wizard wounds him heavily (resulting in an x-shaped scar deep on his face that got him bad in one eye) and opens a portal to basically hell! Vin is gonna fall in but skull makes the effort to try and use the roots of his tree to pull him out. But knowing he can get sucked in too, vintage just makes a promise to get out somehow and come back, sealing it by giving the gift of a small ring he was saving. Unknown to him once he falls and portal closes, skull definitely makes the wizard into plant food! But on the floor of this hellscape, vintage finds himself with some flowers and seeds that had fallen from the tree, a tail, and a new nubby pair of horms and wings. But despite this, he gets up, gathers the seeds, and thinking back on his affinity for magic, he decides he will grow the lilacs while he figures out an escape, all the while being reminded of skull every time he looks at the stuff. It takes some years, and some demons also looking for an escape love his tree and his story (mainly double who helped persuade spirits into protecting the tree and gave vin tips on horn and wing upkeep) but eventually vin has his break when he hears omega call and together they pry open a portal out of there. He's pulled along by a red sole (very excited feral magician) and now he and double are finally out. Double introduces himself while vintage, with magical hell-lilacs tied around tail, disguises his demon features and runs off to find skull.
Only to find the entire forest burned down. He's in shock for some time, wanting to know how and why. One of the last things he saw was a killing blow from skull, it couldn't have been that wizard- but then he spots a soldier's settlement nearby. Hidden amongst charred trees. They chatted merrily, loading up gathered game, and when he asked, they told him the forest was another victim of their pointless war. It wasn't even a turning point, and one of them even laughed and said they'd get "the bad guys" next time.
When the sick of this, much older teen, gets angry enough that his horn-hiding illusion falls, they all quite suddenly realize they've majorly screwed up. And vintage figures out that he has a taste for souls. Red finds him again after though with a gift, a calm pet and a gentle informing that he should be able to visit his hell lilac tree anytime he wants at least. A nice gift, but vintage is too angry at the moment to appreciate it and decides that hes ending the war himself by killing every single person directly involved with it! At times the armies had tried to work together to stop him, but with the power to morph melificent style into a dragon is a pretty solid way to make sure you're just wasting lives, and people figure out pretty quick it's the commanders he wants. Those are sacrificed, but now you just have a very powerful demon with nowhere to place his still burning grief that's very very hard to approach! But word gets around as it does and a blue group of adventurers take up the task of calming the demon and dealing with his haywire magic and deliver a hard truth - that he might have to move on with the friends he made along the way. Post fight, the vampire cruising with blue team scoops vin with some tlc plans and asks that blue team to locate the friends vintage had, and maybe even look into his older friends. And once vintage is awake in a rather cleanly and impressive vampire mansion, he's given news that emperor had heard of a wood elf taking care of a rather flowerless and purple nymph, working with a lot more potions than usual. One can't even begin to describe how relieved Vintage is by this info that his first friend, at the very least, is still alive. It may just take time to get to him with post-magic owchies and all, so emperor decides to send out a nice and classy letter to those friends he had found, inviting them over.
Oh and the only reason skull miraculously survived the warring and forest fire is definitely becausee of the lilac tree currently sitting pretty in hell
SO UH YEAH THATS MY PLOT SO FAR FOR THIS FANTASY AU YEAH VERY WILD I HATE CIVIL WAR QUESTS FUCK CIVIL WAR QUESTS
#ask#coroika#splatoon#fantasy au#kingboos#vintage xblood#skull kun#aviators kun#team xblood#skullvin#aviskullvin#maybe i just. make a new tag of kingly polycules bc i shove a lot of what i like into relationship sections of the aus#but yeah!!! vintage is a demon and Avi is trying to get skulls memories back
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Shadow Work Skills to Develop
Shadow work can feel very…vague to talk about. There’s a bad habit of just kind of handwaving things and hoping people figure it out on their own. Part of that is that it’s so intensely personal. It’s so hard to come up with things that will work for everyone. The other part is that I want people to experiment and add to what we know about shadow work so I don’t want to be too prescriptive in how I teach others to do it.
So, for this post I wanted to dig into some of the most basic skills I use in shadow work in the hopes it’ll help people no matter which methods or paths they take.
Describing Events Neutrally
I put this one first because I think it’s the most important and the more difficult. Our emotions cloud how describe events to ourselves and others. For us to look critically at actions or words, we really need to be able to describe them without intent or emotion. Now, I’m not saying to leave that out entirely, I’ll get to that next. But you have to be able to get a clear view of what was done. This is so important when working with anything that might be triggering. We are too used to describing events with the goal of justifying thoughts, feelings, and actions and in shadow work it helps to break that instinct where you can.
When you can describe events neutrally to start with, it’s easier to see whether the feelings where in line or out of line with what happened. Were you way over reactive? Maybe under reactive? It’s easier to judge that when you have a neutral account to work with.
To practice, try listing out some events as they happen neutrally. An example might be after a tense interaction with someone, listing out what was said and done. If you can, get someone who was there to look at it and someone who wasn’t there to look at it and see what they say as far as how factual and neutral the account is.
Naming Feelings
Many many people cannot tell you what they’re feeling. There’s a myriad of reasons for this but no matter where it comes from it hurts shadow work. Your mood is like an internal weather system, you need to be able to do shadow work that’s appropriate for the weather. How you dig into things if gonna be different if your reaction to feeling trapped is to give up and binge movies or to lash out in anger. Gotta know what you’re working with.
It’s absolutely vital that you practice naming your emotions in day to day life. I did a week where I had an alarm go off five times a day and I wrote down what I was feeling in a note on my phone. A lot of my entries were “I’m not sure”. The practice showed me how often I have no connection to my feelings at all and prompted me to get to know them better.
Try using a feelings wheel or a feelings chart at least once a day to get used to checking in with yourself and putting a name on it.
Defining What You Want
We live in a society that has a very complicated relationship with wants. People often say we live in a consumerist society but we don’t often talk about what that’s done to us psychologically, to be so consumptive. There’s a lot of morality around them too that we internalize. We identify strongly with what we want. We define ourselves through our ambitions and our goals. But it means what we really want gets lost in the pursuit of shaping our desires to be acceptable or admirable. We ignore our desires that don’t fit with our narratives which is such a block to shadow work. How can you work on what you won’t let yourself be conscious of?
You have to understand that you and your desires are not one in the same. Just because you really want to enact violence on someone for what they’ve done doesn’t make you a bad person or a mean person or what have you. It’s a natural human desire. That doesn’t mean that’s it’s justified just that you are not bad for having those thought or desires. This extends to other things people don’t like admitting they want – finding other people more appealing than their partner, wanting someone who’s wronged them to suffer, wanting more for yourself even if it means someone else goes without – they’re all desires we have from time to time.
Practice writing what you want out on paper. Remind yourself you don’t have to act on it and that it’s better to be aware of it so doesn’t sneak into the driver’s seat. It’s important to break the idea that we’re owed what we want or that we have to act on what we want. Desires, much like feelings, come and go. But they’re important to be aware of while they’re here.
Taking Responsibility
I still am unsure of how to describe how to do this. It’s really distress tolerance at it’s core; learning to be okay with not being okay. Because where I see people going wrong with responsibility in shadow work is that they either explain everything away with context or they go it’s all my fault and it’s so terrible I can’t do anything about it.
Part of taking responsibility is being able to answer the question “What do I owe in this situation?” If your answer is always nothing, you’re wrong. We are social creatures, we’re only here because we evolved the intelligence to work closely and creatively with other members of our species. We do owe each other things in any interaction. It’s important to practice thinking about what those things are. Equally important is thinking through what you don’t owe as well.
Practice sitting with your mistakes when they happen and trying to think what’s owed in this situation. Shadow work depends on our ability to take responsibility for the roles we play in what keeps us stuck.
Pattern Recognition
I don’t know that I have much explicit advice for this category other than it’s incredibly helpful. Seeing your patterns is really key to zeroing in on automatic behaviors or thoughts. Pattern recognition is kind of like playing Minesweeper. It gets you a little closer to what you’re trying to uncover without having to step right in it and maintain yourself to be reflective.
Journaling can be really great for this. If you see yourself writing about the same actions or feelings or thoughts again and again and again. Going back through old conversations where you’re venting might give you some clues.
Whenever you find yourself frustrated you keep doing something, take note. When are you doing these things? What does it offer you? What does it protect you from?
We don’t do things repeatedly if they don’t serve us in some way which can be hard for us to admit.
Compassionate Problem Solving
So you’ve dug up these unpleasant truths about yourself, what’s a shadow worker to do? The only way forward is compassionate problem solving. Which is best summed of for me as working with yourself, not against yourself. I’m reminded of permaculture – the problem is the solution.
An example of this in my own life was ADHD. Once I finally realized what I was dealing with was ADHD, I spent several months ignoring it completely and being shocked when I couldn’t will myself to be “normal”. I felt a lot of shame. It was only when I started accepting where I was at and then going okay what can I do that things started to shift. “Okay, if I know I’m gonna forget my keys what can I do?” I put spare house keys and car keys in my car so when I inevitably forgot them somewhere I could call AAA and I’d be able to drive home. “Okay if I’m gonna forget my papers what can I do?” I made digital backup galore so I could access them and print them off at the last minute on campus. My life got so much better with the approach.
Wherever you’re at there are things you can do to make it better going forward and it’s important to get creative and stay reasonable. Getting triggered frequently? Make sure you have a cool down list of some kind on your phone. Too scared to grab groceries by yourself? Grab a buddy or order them and pick them up. Spending too much time in bed because you’re depressed as shit? Set a 5 minute timer and do one thing to make your life better. Literally all of these are personal examples.
There’s always something you can do. Small wins are still wins. Count them. There’s no need to be cruel to yourself while doing shadow work. Practice coming up with at least three different ways to respond to issues that you face. Even if you know a solution isn’t the one you’re gonna take, get used to putting out more than one “right” answer. In shadow work, there’s always more than one path.
Conclusion
I hope this is helpful. A bit rambling, but I think I could have used a post like this when I was starting out. Shadow work gets very individualized, very quickly, but I’ve yet to talk to anyone who wasn’t using at least a few of these in their personal shadow work journey. Hope these skills and how to practice them help!
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#witch#witchblr#witchy#shadow work#journal#journaling#shadow working#shadow work lesson#pagan#pathworking#spirituality
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SCK Asks: Episode 38
(asks under the cut)
Anonymous said: happy edser just HITS different. maybe it's because we've been so deprived of them together and blissful, it's such a joy to watch. i had a silly grin on my face during all their scenes. sure the tumor cloud is looming over our heads, but this episode only laid the foundation for that and then went into romcom mode, which i really appreciated because we've been bogged down for SO LONG with heaviness, it was nice to just take a breather.
OMG! Yes, all of this. And I’m not sure if it’s happy Edser that hits different, or if it was whatever magic and sparkle these writers injected into this episode that made it hit different.
The magic was BACK. The sparkle was BACK. These writers took the most ridiculous scenario idea (these two famous architects deciding to solve a murder) and just made it sing. I grinned through the whole thing and laughed out loud, A LOT.
This was the first episode in ages where I wasn’t watching the clock and waiting for some uncomfortable or unpleasant moment or scene to occur. Instead watching was pure joy and no anxiety, even with a tumor diagnosis.
There was so much good Edser in this episode it’s hard to know what to talk about. I loved every moment they were on screen together.
Anonymous said: I have to hand it to you, you said that the reason they were doing this pregnancy story is so that we could find out that Selin and Serkan never slept together. ngl I wanted her to suffer more, but as long as she’s gone I’m fine with her punishment being the humiliation of having to admit that in front of Eda.
Ha! Yes, I have said that all along, and I’ve never been more relieved to be right. They really went the extra mile with having Selin spell out that it hadn’t happened. With the English subs it almost sounded like they had never, ever had sex, even before. If so, I could actually believe it, their prior relationship seemed to be very business like, like they were each other’s safe, convenient date to business and family functions, and it wasn’t emotional or physical for him.
After the gross story around Selin, and how much damage she did and how much she got away with, this was not nearly enough comeuppance to sate my thirst for her pain. These writers started this story and introduced Selin’s role in it, so it’s not like they 100% inherited something they had nothing to do with. However, between Bige’s limited availability due to her father passing, Sarp Can having covid, and the way the other writers drug it into the ground, I’m also just happy it’s over and will deal with this being all we get, plus, while she didn’t get punished adequately, she did take her lumps. It’s humiliating that Serkan went around acting incredulous to everyone who would listen that she could be pregnant because he never touched her, even while she was his fiancé. I mean that’s a shrinker. Can you imagine agreeing to marry a man who you knew didn’t want to touch you? Everyone now knows her sad, pathetic desperation to have him under any circumstances. Yikes.
And as you say, she then had to stand in front of Eda and Serkan and admit he didn’t touch her. Admit that Serkan never wanted her, and it’s humiliating that everyone at Art Life knows what she did and thinks she’s a monster. Serkan finally knows she’s an awful manipulator who tried to trick him, and in the end she gets an unplanned pregnancy with a man who doesn’t love her and whom she doesn’t love. So it’s not like she’s winning by any stretch of the imagination.
(Though I really wish everyone knew (mostly Serkan and Eda) that she sabotaged Eda’s presentation. It’s important for the characters to know that she can’t be trusted professionally as well as personally... but oh well.)
Anonymous said: Two things: 1) I kinda love it even more that they got the tattoos before he found about the illness.. idk why but it was even MORE romantic. Also does this mean they're kinda sorta engaged again since the reason she said no in the first place was Selin? and 2) I need more of that "ring for love" bell ASAP. My jaw actually dropped when he lifted her up since we were deprived of it in 26.. please more breaking of family structures!!
Oh I agree, I found it very romantic they went and got the tattoos and the only impetus was their desire to have a symbol of their love. I already love those tattoos so much, and I love that they sat their designing them together. They really do signify the ultimate commitment.
I’m not sure if they’re engaged or not. Maybe they’re in a place where it’s obvious they’re going to get married, they both know they’re going to get married, but we’re still going to get one more proposal to make it official?
As for the ring for love bell, when and where did he get that!? Hee. And yes to more breaking of the Turkish family structure. That lift and twirl through the living room was... HOT. And it was just so effortless, there are just no words at times for how good Hande and Kerem are, I’ve really never seen anything like it. They don’t really have time to rehearse on set, or limitless takes or the time to really block and perfect things, but they’re just so good together they make magic happen every time they’re on screen. Amazing. Enjoy this kids, because you probably won’t see anything like it again.
Anonymous said: With the nature of these shows, Eda and Serkan will not a blissful happily ever after without something hanging over there heads or some new drama until the show actually ends. So if the new angst is Serkan's potential illness, I'm down for the potential angst it'll create.. it's already a good sign that, although he hasn't told her about it yet, he's not pushing her away in fear, but instead the opposite. I also don't think, and really hope not, him keeping it secret rn won't cause trouble.
Yes, I like that even with that heavy health news hanging over the episode, it was still light and funny and romantic and had that old sparkle. That tells me that they’re going to strike the right tone with this story which seems to be a very carpe diem thing with Serkan.
It didn’t bother me that he didn’t tell her. First, he told the doctor that he didn’t want anyone to know until he had a diagnosis. That makes sense, why worry her, or any of them, before they know. I’m sure I would feel different if he was pushing her away because of the diagnosis, but since he’s holding her close and just seems to want to spend time with her, without that heaviness hanging over her head, I’m okay with it.
Also, as seen in the new fragman, if this story is an excuse to get them out of the office and put them in all sorts of scenarios together it would otherwise be hard to justify, bring it on. Let’s see how far down the list of things to do they can get!
Anonymous said: i know no one reaaaally cares because they're not most people's favorite side characters, but it's really much nicer to watch aydan and ayfer scenes now that they're both on "team edser" and have become really good friends. i swear, the AAA trio scenes were so unbearable to watch when they were fighting over him and i was fast forwarding through all of them.. at least i can sit through team "united" aydan/ayfer scenes.
They’re actually enjoyable scenes now! I love that they’ve become actual true friends, best friends really, and along with Seyfi I love their little trio. Love that Seyfi and Ayfer were being so supportive about Aydan rekindling something with Kemal. And I agree that we can root for them when they’re working for Edser’s well-being and happiness. I just hope Aydan doesn’t do something stupid if there begins to be some question about Serkan’s parentage.
Anonymous said: the scooby doo gang ending had me laughing so hard i was tearing up when more and more people kept sneaking in and eda and serkan were getting more and more exasperated. erdem accidentally using flash took me tf out lmao. i love when sck does comedy with the whole cast and not just the usual "comedy" characters.. they're some of my favorite scenes! both "asking for the girl" scenes come to mind.
You could see Erdem using the flash coming from a mile away, but that still didn’t blunt the comedy when he actually did it. So funny. Also Engin not recognizing Eda, imagine him thinking Serkan is there with some rando woman. I also love the full cast comedy scenes, they are so much fun and really should be utilized as often as possible.
The scene where Edser walk back into the house and Aydan and Kemal were there paying their respects had me screech-laughing! So so so funny. Both sides being incredulous that the other was there and wanting answers! I also enjoyed that Serkan obviously put Erdem in charge of Kemal’s project, because he wants that project to go away. Unfortunately for Serkan, I think it’s going to take more than Erdem to drive Kemal away.
Anonymous said: Everyone is saying serkan planned the whole thing, do you buy into that? Idk would he really put everyone in a gunpoint situation where they don’t know it’s fake? Cause that’s some potentially trauma inducing stuff. Also I have no idea where they’re going with this, since it’s been a 4 day break from set which is kind of worrying. And do you know why Melisa wasn’t in the ep? I know Sarp can got Covid but wasn’t Melisa posting with cast members on her story throughout the week?
Wow, this is a lot of negative energy and fretting after a really good episode. Deep breath. Since you sent this, we know that Hande and Kerem have been shooting for 2 full days at a romantic looking beach location for 39, so it looks like Edser has some sort of mini-getaway. I don’t see any reason to be concerned about the 4 day break last week. (now the fragman’s out, hopefully that puts your mind at ease)
No idea why Melissa wasn’t in the ep, other than the way the ep was structured with the supporting characters, if she had to miss the ArtLife shooting day then I can see that they would have had to write her out of the full episode, because most of their scenes were there and it set up everything for the rest of the episode. So perhaps she was in quarantine for a Covid exposure, maybe she was legit sick/injured (she has had a foot thing) or maybe she had a conflict for that one shooting day. No idea, but I don’t think it’s anything to worry about. Also her absence gave us Ferit/Melo scenes and I’m 100% behind that, give us more of those!
As far as if Serkan planned the whole thing, he did look pretty smug and relaxed while sitting there at the end, but he also wasn’t planning for the whole group to tag along and make a mess, lmao. We’ll have to see.
Anonymous said: Do you think bad ratings makes sck in danger of being cancelled or do you think high social media engagement keeps it safe?
Friends, I don’t know anything about the Turkish system, but it seems to me that SCK will either go through May or extend into summer and end then, regardless of the ratings. We shall see. As I’ve said before I’m not going to engage in the fretting and worrying and discussion on this topic because no fan really knows what they’re talking about and there is nothing we can do to change what will happen. So just enjoy the show while we can, the news on when it will end will come when it comes.
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allyster i am genuinely so excited i have had Ideas for my clingyduo superhero au and my benchtrio ghosts au and ive! actually written some of them down! granted it was just in the notes app bc for some reason its easier for me to write in the notes app which is annoying bc i hate typing on my phone but. ill take what i can get
anyway *flappy hands* im so excited!!! :D
also!! tell me abt your pantheon au! specifically like- the characters relations to each other and roles and what they look like/their color schemes or outfits or notable stuff and also just anything you want to share. considering i dont have the attention span to fully read a quarter of your posts abt it i am Incredibly invested
OOOOOO :DDD those will be so cool if you ever post anything you write you HAVE to tag me!! and if you ever need someone to bounce ideas off of for either i am here they sound very cool :]
I AM TOO!!!! :D
and AAA I WILL :]] i actually literally havent thought about character designs at ALL if you (or anyone) have ideas im so super open to them LMAO. i have a couple myths written out, but i've mainly worked on the actual mythology of the au. so i have a death system in place (one that i think is actually really interesting but also hard to explain and has changed over time through conflicts among the gods so it depends at one point you died what system you went through) and a general idea of background for the lore (humans and gods (basically humanoid beings with lots of power) used to both live on earth, but after something (read: wilbur) happened, a war began and the gods built heaven/a higher plane in general so the bloodshed would stop. things have cooled off since, and humans now worship the gods & pray for guidance and things) as well as a general idea for some (but not all) of the dsmp members' duties and titles as gods and FINALLY two myths (the story of wilbur which is so hard to explain it needs its own post, and the sweet story of how ranboo became a god by befriending tubbo). YEAH!
if you want i'll talk about which character is what god/what the myths actually are but tonight im too tired to type it all out lmao. if you send me an ask though i'll talk about it tomorrow :D
#(or the next day bc im busy tomorrow but im not sure when people are arriving so ajsfjkdsf hopefully i have the time)#ask#stardust !#pantheon au
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Caine Soren
Hiya guys, so here are my thoughts and opinions on Caine from my re-read of the first book. I was planning on writing this quicker but my ADHD told me no. I’m prolly gonna write up a bunch now though because I’m ✨in the zone✨ Also, apologies but this is another long one because I am physically incapable of being concise
Spoilers for Gone down below
Original Opinion: Most of my criticism on him as a character came as a result of later development so I’m not quite sure whether that will change as of yet. But as far as his role as a villain, I really enjoyed his character and what he brought to the story.
New Opinion: I still maintain that Caine is a good main villain for this book. I found him to be waaaaay different and way less competent than I remember, but boy is he interesting. I have so many thoughts on Caine and it was a real struggle getting them all down.
1.) CAINE’S APPEARANCE:
Ok so we are first introduced to Caine in chapter 14 through Sam’s POV. We see him standing apart from the other Coates kids “wearing a bright yellow V-necked sweater instead of a blazer.” This is obviously done to set him apart from the other Coates kids, and (forgive me for going all English teacher on you) the colour yellow has connotations of corruption and deceit, which fit in pretty nicely with Caine as a character. Sam then goes on to give us a more detailed description:
“He was handsome, even Sam noticed that. He had dark hair and dark eyes, not much different from Sam himself. But this boy’s face seemed to glow with an inner light. He radiated confidence, but without arrogance or condescension. In fact, he managed to seem genuinely humble even while standing alone, looking out over everyone else.”
This is one of my least favourite descriptions in the whole book because it simultaneously manages to tell us almost nothing about Caine’s appearance whilst making me cringe so hard that my muscles start to atrophy. Seen as we get very little description of Sam, telling us that Caine looks like Sam is pretty much useless – although it nicely sets up the brother twist – and dark hair and dark eyes could mean anything. Are his eyes blue, brown, black?? Is his hair black or brown?? Who knows?? Not me. And don’t even get me started on his face glowing with an inner light. Because no. I hate this line so much it actually hurts. I thought at first it may be in reference to his connection with the gaiaphage. But that makes no sense. It reminds me of the scene in The Great Gatsby where Nick describes Gatsby’s smile for about half a page and he just sounds ridiculous. I will admit the last two sentences give a good example of Caine’s ability to charm and manipulate those around him but the rest is just aaa
We also learn that he is handsome, which is then followed by what I consider to be a writer’s greatest sin. “He was handsome, even Sam noticed that” – Every. Single. Time a male character describes another male character who just so happens to be attractive in any given book from any author, we get this line. It is the writer’s equivalent of saying no homo and I’m going to make it my personal mission to call them all out on it.
Ok moving on – sorry about that. Rant over.
Sam then says that “His voice was clear and just a little higher, maybe, than Sam’s, but strong and determined. He had a way of looking at the crowed before him that made it seem he was meeting every person’s eye, seeing every person as an individual.” This is good at further establishing Caine as a leader, and shows his relationship with crowds, it gives the reader some indication of his ability to control. He is able to easily win over those of Perdido Beach with his charm.
Caine gets referred to as being attractive by a few other characters throughout the book, but the last main description we get of him is from Drake’s POV in chapter 20:
“Caine sat in his over-large leather chair, the one that had previously belonged to the mayor of Perdido Beach. It made him look small. It made him look very young. And to make matters worse, he was chewing on his thumbnail, which made it almost look like he was sucking his thumb.”
This description is kind of reminiscent of the scene with Sam and the shirt that I talked about in my Sam Temple post. He has taken over the mayor’s chair but he is not fit to take on the position of mayor. Whereas Sam’s weakness in leadership stems from his insecurities and doubts, it is Caine’s narcissism and over-confidence that make him unfit to lead. Michael gives Caine the compulsion of biting his thumbnail when he is nervous. This is a habit that people often pick up to deal with challenging emotions is a less destructive way (as opposed to having a meltdown or getting angry) and works nicely for Caine’s character. It shows that while he does have his moments where he loses control, he is capable of controlling himself to a certain degree, making it seem more likely that someone like Diana might align herself with him. This also helps to further the idea that despite his narcissism and delusions of grandeur, he is still just a kid. And of course sets up the idea that Drake is somewhat resentful towards Caine.
2.) CAINE’S PERSONALITY:
Caine’s personality is a difficult one to analyse as there are two main aspects to it – the personality he projects in order to manipulate people and his actual personality – and sometimes the line between these blurs to the point where it becomes unclear which one we are seeing. One thing that I did notice is that in this book we don’t actually get a Caine POV until the Thanksgiving battle, so we mostly see him through the eyes of Sam, Jack, Drake and Diana, who all have very different relationships with him.
As I mentioned before, we first see Caine through Sam’s POV, where we are introduced to what I’m gonna call his fake personality. Michael uses phrases such as “Caine appeared interested” alongside Astrid’s commentary, which lets the reader know that Caine is not what he appears to be, but of course the general population of Perdido Beach are not aware of this. One criticism I had towards the way that Caine’s character is portrayed is that it is initially hinted that the reason he is able to gain such control over people is because of his proficiency in manipulation and his superficial kindness (such as when he comforts the kid who asks for his mum). And yet he manages to fool almost no-one?? Astrid, Sam, Edilio, Albert, Mary and Howard all immediately see through his façade, which makes it hard to believe that this is how he gained such influence over people. (And of course all the kids at Coates who were cemented saw through it too). In fact I found myself to be kind of confused as to why anyone follows him at all?? Is it just a fear of his power?? That’s… a little disappointing. He doesn’t become mayor because he charms the population. He becomes mayor because no-one else wants to do it, and no-one can be bothered to oppose him. And even when people start to become more afraid, they aren’t afraid of Caine. It’s Drake. Although, you of course have to take into account the fact that these are just children who want someone they can look towards for help and guidance. Perhaps Caine’s persuasive abilities are less about using his charm to completely win people over and more about him being able to take advantage of situations that are presented to him. He has just enough superficial charm and makes just enough beneficial changes (such as laying down rules and protecting the food) that people are willing to overlook some of the more sinister things that he does.
That being said, I think my main issue with so many characters being able to see through Caine so quickly, is what it says about or “hero.” Sam doing nothing to stop Caine, despite him clearly knowing that Caine is bad news makes him seem a little selfish?? His insecurities stop him from doing what is right, and while it is good to have a flawed hero, his willingness to allow Caine to terrorise Perdido Beach up until he threatens Sam personally seems less like a small character flaw and more like a pretty big lapse in morality and compassion. Would Sam have ever taken control if Caine hadn’t kidnapped him?? If Sam had been fooled by Caine’s manipulation that would imo have made both of their characters better fit their respective roles of protagonist and antagonist.
That being said one of my absolute favourite lines regarding Caine is “Then let’s go in together,’ Caine said. He turned and marched purposefully up the church steps. The rest of the chosen fell in behind him.” in chapter 14. I think this perfectly captures the contrast between what Caine says and what he does, and I really love it. One of Michael’s strengths is adding little throw away lines that can perfectly sum up a character and their intentions. And this idea of Caine saying something but meaning something else is pretty central to his character – the biggest pay-off we get from this in book 1 is him promising to protect the little’s and then (horrifyingly) feeding them to the coyotes in the final battle. This was a scene that I did not previously remember and man did I feel some emotions when reading it. There wasn’t even a second thought, absolutely no indication of remorse. I know a few times it’s mentioned throughout the books that the difference between Caine and Drake is that Caine only does what is necessary – but the scene with the coyotes really contradicts that idea.
Caine’s ‘real personality’ imo is shown in little moments throughout the books. By Caine’s real personality, I’m referring to the part of him that we don’t really see at all in this book, the part of him that is only really hinted at by Diana, and occasionally Drake. Even when Caine is around Diana and Drake, he still tries to keep up a persona – this time that of a cold and detached boy with little to no emotions. But this isn’t really who he is. I think the ‘real’ Caine is an extremely emotional person (although I would like to clarify that by emotional I mainly mean angry and sometimes scared) and there are a couple of moments where this does shine through. There are a few times where Caine loses his temper with both Drake and Diana, using his powers to injure them and to reiterate the power he has over them. I think this shows how insecure Caine truly is, despite what he would have others believe. He only ever breaks character when his authority is mocked or threatened, even if the threat holds no real intention (such as Diana’s jibe after he kisses her). I do find it interesting that, at the core, Sam and Caine are quite similar. It is how these insecurities manifest and project themselves that really define them as different. Caine’s insecurities also shine through in these quotes from Diana:
“Yes. Sam is a four bar. And Caine would freak.” – Chapter 29
“Caine, despite his over-sized ego, his looks, his charm, was terribly awkward with girls.” – Chapter 39
Caine needs to be in control. He needs to be the most powerful person in the room at all times, and the only two people who can really be considered a threat to him in this way are Diana and Sam. Sam is his main threat and Diana, of course, holds a certain amount of power over him due to his feelings towards her. However, any time that Diana seems to be gaining or trying to gain more power (most notably when she makes fun of him for kissing her and when she tries to make him call off the coyotes) he reacts with violence. But I’ll go into that more when I make a post about their relationship.
Another thing that I noticed about Caine that I hadn’t previously remembered is that, he’s a bit of a coward. We first see this in chapter 34 when Little Pete frees the Coates kids “Caine was quick. He backed away, turned, and ran for the building.” The one thing that really got me about this is that he didn’t wait for Diana. He just turned and saved himself. Which kind of brings into question why Diana stays with him. Does he offer protection?? He certainly didn’t here. He literally abandoned her and ran for the hills. The other time we really see this side of him when he uses Astrid as a human shield in chapter 45. Diana even comments on this, telling him to “be a man for once.” I don’t have much else to say about this, but I think it’s an interesting aspect of his personality that certainly makes it easier to dislike him.
Now the last thing I want to talk about in regards to his personality is chapter 36 (the chapter where Drake gets his arm cut off). Caine gets in three good moments during this scene, the first one being:
“It’s not Diana or Chunk or even me,’ Caine said. ‘It’s none of us, Drake. It’s Sam. It’s Sam who did this to you, Drake. You want him to get away with it? Or do you want to live long enough to make him suffer?”
This is one of my favourite Caine moments in the book, and it’s really one of the only times that we see his manipulation actually work on someone. He knows exactly what to say to Drake in order to shift the blame in the direction he wants. Forget that I left you behind to deal with Sam and the escaped kids yourself. Forget that Diana is sawing your arm off. Just focus on Sam. And I think this line had such an effect on Drake’s psyche (which I will explore more in my Drake post) and really excellently shows off Caine’s ability to take advantage of a pre-existing situation in order to benefit himself.
The next two moments are where I really think the lines between Caine’s persona and the ‘real’ Caine blur to the point where it’s unclear which side of him we are seeing – and I think there is an argument for both although imo I feel like it’s his persona that we are seeing.
“It’s the only way to stop the pain,’ Caine said, almost showing some emotion, some pity. ‘The arm is done for Drake-man.”
“Don’t cut off my arm,’ Drake cried. ‘Let me die. Just let me die. Shoot me. ‘Sorry,’ Caine said. ‘But I still need you, Drake. Even one-handed.”
So, we first get the idea that Caine, at least somewhat, feels sorry for Drake. Drake’s injury is horrific and it’s clear that other characters, such as Jack and Diana, who are usually nothing but hostile to Drake (and rightfully so) feel some sympathy towards the situation. Now it’s also important to note that this scene is from Drake’s POV so we don’t actually know if the sympathy Caine is showing is real, is part of his attempt to manipulate Drake, or isn’t there at all and is just something that Drake wants. (I think the last option is entirely plausible as Drake often seeks praise from Caine, so in a situation like this it makes sense that he would seek some empathy). However, Caine then goes on to refuse Drake’s plea for death… because he needs him. Not because he’s a friend – or even just an ally. Not because he doesn’t want him to die. But because he needs him. That’s cold. And it’s really cold to tell him that – which leads me to believe that the almost sympathy Drake sees earlier on was never there, or at the very least was just a manipulation tactic. Caine cares so little for the people around him and I find it quite funny that it was his treatment of Drake (the person probably most deserving of it) in this scene that really showed me how much of a villain Caine can be.
3.) CAINE’S MOTIVATIONS:
Why does Caine do the things he does?? Why does he need to be in control?? And while we don’t really get much insight into Caine’s head in this book, there are a few good moments which allowed a reader to speculate as to what his motivations are. The first moment that really stood out to me was in chapter 39, where Caine tries to open up to Diana about his parents:
“I always had the feeling, you know? That my family wasn’t my real family. They never said I was adopted, but my mother – well, the woman I thought was my mother, I don’t know what to call her now. Anyway, her, she never talked about having me. You know, you hear moms talking about going into labour and all. She never talked about that.”
From this, we can see that Caine always felt like an outsider within his own family, he always felt like he didn’t belong. And this seems to be a pretty big motivator when it comes to Caine’s need to take over, to have power over everyone else. If he has control, then he will always have a place. He will always belong because the world will be his. Caine never fit in in the real world, his narcissism (and probably psychopathy) distanced him from other people right from the get go. But in this new world, in the FAYZ, Caine has a chance to be important, to be a ruler and he’s willing to do pretty much anything to get that. I think this idea, of his need for power and control stemming from the lack of acceptance and belonging he felt with his family, is emphasised in chapter 46, during the poof:
“Caine seemed spellbound, unable to tear his gaze away from the gentle, smiling face, the piercing blue eyes. ‘Why?’ Caine asked in a small child’s voice. […] ‘Why him and not me?’ Caine asked.”
This is the only time I felt the slightest bit of sympathy for Caine during my re-read of this book. He is 14. A kid. He spent his whole life feeling like and outsider and now he knows that a woman he knew, a woman that he saw almost every night is his actual mother. That she also knew this and yet never tried to talk to him, to explain, to do anything. And now he’s looking at ‘her’ and all he wants to know is why. Why did she give him up?? He lacks empathy and many other emotions that allow healthy relationships with others, yet he still wants people to have that connection with him. He needs him and rely on him. So his solution is to gain enough power, enough authority and control so that people have to listen to him and have to rely on him. He doesn’t care how many people he hurts or pisses off, because in the end, if he gets what he wants, that won’t matter. He’ll be too powerful for it to matter because they’ll still need him anyway. And that’s why “All that matters is winning. So save it.” – Chapter 45
4.) CAINE’S INTENTIONS/ HIS ROLE AS A VILLAIN:
Caine’s intentions are pretty obvious from the very first time we meet him in chapter 14. And, of course, it is these intentions that really define his role as a villain. Now, in chapter 14, it never outright says that Caine’s intentions are to take complete control over Perdido Beach. In fact, Caine tries to make it seem like he wants to make a collaborative effort to help them all move forward. But once again, his actions contradict his words, most notably in these lines:
“Orc grunted, shifted the bat from right hand to left, and stuck out his thick paw. Caine grabbed it with both his hands and solemnly looked Orc in the eye as they shook hands.”
“But Caine grabbed his elbow and manoeuvred him into a handshake.” [Referring to Sam]
“Caine had moved confidently towards the altar.”
These lines subtly show that, whilst Caine talks about working together, he is really the one in charge. He is the one dictating what is happening and when it is happening, forcing Sam and Orc to shake his hand. Giving them jobs so that he can keep an eye on them (Orc) or keep them out of the way (Sam). And of course, he won’t stand with them in the church. They don’t sit around a table and talk as equals. Caine has to be up at the front. He also gets extremely angry when other people make demands, or give an idea that he can’t take credit for. The most obvious example of this being in response to Howard telling him that they wouldn’t be working for Drake. “Sam saw a coldly furious expression appear on Caine’s handsome face, then disappear as swiftly as it had come.” This is then followed up by Caine ripping a 12ft cross off of a wall and launching it at them, so it’s safe to say that he doesn’t appreciate his authority being challenged.
Later in the book we then get more obvious examples of his intentions, as his role as the villain is fully unveiled:
“Caine, to the surprise of no-one who knew him, had taken over the mayor’s office.” – Chapter 15
“Number one says Caine is the mayor of Perdido Beach and the whole area known as the FAYZ.” – Chapter 16
After Caine basically walks into Perdido Beach, tells everyone what to do, and gets away with it, he begins to be more outright with his intentions. He immediately takes over the mayor’s office, and makes his new title of mayor the very first rule to be enforced. He isn’t really all that secretive about his intentions, at least not after the initial meeting. I think this is a measure of his confidence – he doesn’t feel at all threatened by the people of Perdido Beach. I think one of the reasons that Caine is such a good villain, is that when he is in control, he isn’t that bad?? I mean sure, having Drake as sheriff is less than ideal, but Caine himself is not a bad leader. He comes up with rules that both make sense and do actively increase the quality of life of those in Perdido Beach (minus the no magic tricks rule). It’s only what Caine is willing to do in order to get that power that actually makes him the villain. Once he has it, he’s not really a threat?? And then of course, we get Caine’s fantastic little speech in chapter 42 that really just sums up all these ideas in much less words:
“What was I supposed to do? Coates? That’s it? How do you not see what an opportunity this is? We’re in a whole new world. I’m the most powerful person in that whole new world. No adults. No parents or teachers or cops. It’s perfect. Perfect for me. All I have to do is take care of Sam and a few others, and I’ll have complete control.”
Because if it wasn’t for his ego, if he hadn’t attacked Sam, if he hadn’t used Drake to cause fear and enmity, he would have had it. He would have gotten his complete control, because no-one else really wanted to be in charge. The fool is his own worst enemy.
5.) CAINE’S POWERS:
So, the last thing I wanted to discuss about Caine, is his powers. To me, it seemed whilst reading that his powers are almost an extension of his personality. Caine is naturally a very domineering person, and so it makes sense that his power is the ability to control things with his mind. The first time we see Caine’s powers (also the first time we see anyone purposefully use their powers) is in the church:
“Caine sighed, raised his hands, and used both palms to smooth back his hair. There came a rumble, up through the floor and pews. A small earthquake… […] But then came a rending sound, steel and wood twisting, and the crucifix separated from the wall. It ripped free of the bolts holding it in place, like an invisible giant had yanked it away. […] The crucifix toppled forwards. It fell like a chain sawed tree. As it fell, Caine dropped his hands to his sides. His face was grim, hard, and angry. The crucifix, at least a dozen feet tall, slammed with shocking force down onto the front-row pew. The impact was as loud and sudden as a car wreck.” – Chapter 14
I like how, similarly to the way he talks, the first time we see a display of his power, he is hiding it – his body language is suggesting one action whilst he is actually doing something else entirely. This again makes me feel like the powers are an extension of personalities (and I will give other examples of this is later posts). I also noticed that the use of his powers is almost always as a response to his anger, something that Sam also learns to do thanks to Astrid’s guidance. These two scenes are great examples of this:
“Caine’s smile was cold. He raised his hand, palm out. An invisible fist hit Sam in the face. He staggered back. He barely stopped himself from falling, but his head was reeling. Blood leaked from his nose.” – Chapter 21
“Caine reached back over his shoulder with one hand, not even looking back. He spread his fingers, bared his palms. The fallen portion of the wall came apart, brick by brick. One by one, as though each brick had sprouted wings, they lifted off and flew. The bricks hurtled past Caine’s head and through the open door as fast as machine-gun bullets.” – Chapter 31
Unlike Sam, who often uses his powers as a defence strategy, Caine always uses them as a method of attack. He attacks Orc’s gang, Drake, Sam and Andrew – not as a last resort, but as a warning. He likes to make a big display of his power in order to deter people from actually engaging in a fight. Although when it does come down to an actual fight, he tends to be a little less confrontational and a little bit more of a coward. I mean come one. Hiding behind Astrid was low. At least this is the case in book 1.
Next, is the development of his powers. Unlike Sam, we know that Caine did not discover his powers alone:
“Several of us developed strange powers, starting a few months ago,’ Caine said conversationally. ‘We were like a secret club. Frederico, Andrew, Dekka, Brianna, some others. We worked together to develop them. Encouraged each other. See, that’s the difference between Coates people and you townies. In boarding school it’s hard to keep secrets. But soon it became clear that my powers were of a whole different order. What I just did to you? No one else could do that.”
The Coates kids formed a sort of support group for each other, which is why they have such a good understanding of their powers, as opposed to Lana and the Perdido Beach kids, who either hid their powers or else didn’t discover them until the FAYZ began. One thing that I do find interesting about this, is that the Coates kids all seemed to develop their powers pretty late. Caine says that the powers started a few months ago, and yet Sam first used his 14 months before the FAYZ began. I think that goes to show how the Coates environment really gave Caine the ability to experiment with and foster his powers, which is why he has such control. He achieved in a few months what is took Sam over a year to do. (One thing that I think would have been nice to have is perhaps in a later book some flashbacks on the Coates kids working together to do this. But oh well)
Thank you so much again for reading, and please feel free to add your thoughts. Next up is Diana and I have a lot to say about her. :)
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