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starsofjewels · 4 months ago

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hi i love your gregor fic!!! i have a request if that’s cool, so ya know how rhaenyra and daemon snuck out and went to flea bottom and to the brothel in hotd, welll i was thinking princess!reader and gregor her guard they sneak off and go into a brothel and ykyk!! then like the next day, someone goes to the queen and small council to tell them the rumors and sandor is just like in the corner 🤨🫢🫨

Tarnishment

Gregor Clegane x Baratheon Princess! Reader

NSFW!!

Any and all characters depicted in NSFW pieces are of legal age.All characters are also consenting (Unless specificed by piece)

CONTENT: SMUT- Nudity, fingering, climbing the Mountain (obviously), assumed! Murder, canon compliant! Sex work (prostitutes, brothels etc), mentions of alcohol (mostly wine), implied! Infidelity (Baratheon Princess does it Nyra style)

Delicious smut underneath the cut

Greggie C, Big Bob and the Lannisters are all their own individual warnings.

Word Count: 3.6K

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Holy frickle frackle mackrel I genuinely loved writing this so much- WHY do you all how so many good ideas OH MY LORD.

Thank you so much for this, we are all sluts for Greggie now. Gods be good.

I'm trying to get through my requests, but soon we'll have lil sprinklings of things- I've got another Ramsay and a very special surprise fic (hold your excitement) lined up for y'all once I'm done my requests.

Live, Laugh, Gregor Clegane.

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Tarish (verb): To compromise, damage, soil or sully.

When your mother bears you a little brother, at the grand age of seven, you are old enough to understand that your importance has dropped significantly. You were never going to be heir to the throne, not whilst your father has two living brothers, but there is still a general sense that you are no longer as necessary to the Baratheon lineage, not now little baby Joffrey has a golden cradle, with yellow hair to match.

Your father doesn’t care much for Joffrey, or Tommen, or Myrcella. You don’t think he cares for much besides wine and whores and hunting down animals in the Godswood. He calls your siblings the ‘Lion Pups’, a secret joke between the two of you. They could pass as pure Lannisters, with their slim figures and golden hair, but you? You are your father’s Baratheon princess, and you are his most favourite.

After your first blood, and, coincidentally enough, Joffrey’s fourth nameday, your father decides you should each have a member of the Kingsguard to take care of you. The crown prince is now too old to need a nurse, and you are a fertile little lady- The phrasing makes you cringe- You need protection from debauchery, as your mother says. You wonder if the world is truly so terrible that a man could desire you.

Cersei wants to give you the Hound, but you are far too good for Sandor Clegane, the Burned Knight. So you get his brother, the Mountain, and already you know why the men shiver when they see him, and why women hide their babies. Joffrey is given over to Sandor, to your mother’s dismay.

And so, it begins. You attend your lessons on the back of a Mountain, you watch him fight and train as you sew, and when you go into town you are permitted to stray into the markets and shops, with your personal guard barely a foot behind. You remind yourself you have more freedoms than any princess when you receive another scolding from your mother, when you long to attend the hunts.

You are an affectionate person, Cersei knows that, but even she grows suspicious at how close Gregor has gotten to you. He carries you places as though you are his bride, as though you could not walk without him, and whispers begin of your behaviour in private being far less innocent. But, there is no evidence.

Summer is a privilege and a pain all at the same time. The palace is hot, and sticky, as are you. Even with the soft breezes of night, the warmth hides not so far away. If anyone were to see you, they’d find you most indecent. Your nightdress is short, and covers just enough of your cleavage that your nipples are not exposed. If you jumped, or did anything other than walk a few slow paces, you aren’t sure they wouldn’t be.

“Alright, Princess?”

You hadn’t realised Gregor was standing there. You are too hot and too bored to do anything more than feel a bit sorry for yourself. He knows that.

The response you give is somewhere between a groan and a grunt, it makes him laugh. You like to make him laugh, it reminds you he isn’t just the big, scary Mountain you see in his armour. Which you suddenly realise he isn’t wearing.

Your Mountain is dressed in a tunic, a red one- Lannister, obviously- And you aren’t sure you’ve ever seen him without his armour. But then, you suppose he isn’t off duty very much, his duties are very much full-time.

“Mh- What are you wearing?”

Gregor moves closer, throwing something light upon your bed,

“Goin’ out. Get dressed.”

He pulls you out of bed, an action which reminds you of your nurses doing the same. The man pulls your nightdress up for you, pulling a simple dress more suited for one of the staff over you, and a cloak on the top.

“Thank Dana downstairs, she’s letting you borrow it.”

“Did you steal a dress?”

You are granted a shrug in response, you assume that means a yes.

Though Gregor is not easily disguised, there are plenty of ladies in the Keep with your hair colour and figure. You could just as easily be a whore as you are a princess, and that delights you.

The courtyard is dark and empty, no-one wants to venture out this late, not anyone who cares about their reputation, at least. The Street of Silk, and her sister streets, will all be bustling with off-duty guards, and whoever else feels the need for company. The guards stationed at the gates assume the same of Gregor when he passes, you think.

“Who’s watching the princess?”

Your heart jumps, you cling onto him almost suspiciously tightly, and you know that they notice.

“Do you think I care about the fucking duty board? Check yourself if you’re that bothered.”

The other scoffs at that, and you feel him jab your shoulder,

“Something wrong with your whore?”

“Don’t know, just taking her back.”

Gregor lifts you up, you hide your face in his shoulder. The guards let you pass, and once you are reasonably away from the Keep, he puts you back down.

“Arseholes.” The man looks back, keeping you close, “let’s have some fun, eh? I know the place.”

King's Landing is a seedy place, you know that even in the day, but at night, it ignites. The streets are filled with lust and shamelessness, you wonder if your septa might die at the sight of it. Whores line the streets, and you can tell which are the newer, poorer ones, and which of the women come from ‘respectable’ houses. He leads you through the Street of Silk, you know it even without any markers, from the drunk men lying against the walls, or on the ground, and you are frightened.

You see no silk, you see blood and piss and far too much of other women, but that is all.

The place he leads you to is clean, at least, and reasonably unassuming. There are candles and flowers outside, you wonder if this brothel is one of the higher-end ones, or if inside it is double as bad as the streets.

You are sat neatly on a cushioned bench, and ladies bring you drink. Wines, and ales and other alcohols you have neither heard about nor tasted. You see them giggle to themselves, and you realise that your disguise is poor. They all know the Baratheon princess has graced their presence. It will have some impact on you later, the thought crosses your mind as Gregor tilts your third cup of wine down your throat, when one of them is offered a pretty gold coin in exchange for all of your secrets.

But, you do not care. You are allowed to have fun, even if your idea of fun stems past the gossiping, and the sewing your mother would like you to do.

“Gods-”

You are drawn from your thoughts by Gregor, who sets another cup down on the table,

“You Baratheons really can drink, Princess, that’s your fifth tonight.”

Sure enough, the cup in your hand has four identical siblings, strewn about in various positions across the table, and one on the floor. The man shakes his head.

“Well, how many have you had?”

“Don’t take wine. Woman’s drink.”

When the music begins, you aren’t truly sure if it’s real, or if your alcohol-addled mind has simply hallucinated it to entertain you; but Gregor shuffles his huge form over, and puts an arm around your waist, glancing occasionally to the platform in front of you, so you assume it to be real.

The women who wear any clothes wear barely any at all. They dance with feathers, and pretty shiny things- Baubles and bells, which jingle with every step they take. Some have silver hair, Targaryen hair, and you are reminded that even though their fiery blood has faded out, given your father’s proclivity for murdering them, some men still want to tame the dragon. They wink, and they gasp, and they moan, as though their dancing is the most exciting thing they could have ever done. Some of the men- For it is all men- Jeer, they call them whores, and other words you can’t imagine anyone else repeating. It makes Gregor laugh, and for once you aren’t so sure if you like that. He notices, pressing a comforting kiss to your forehead.

“We’ll go to our room in a bit, yeah? You’ll like that.”

Not entirely sure what he means, you nod anyway.

The dancers end in a puff of smoke and incense, you pretend not to notice as they slip away, with one, or two, or even three men chasing after them. You wonder if three men could even fit inside the one woman, and your mind brings you to unsavoury places.

You don’t feel particularly drunk, the wine must have been watered down, but still, Gregor lifts you up to take you further into the brothel. The noises are no less than sinful- Groans, and cries and the screams of men as they finish themselves off. You hear names, whispered into the night, and the whores run to and from their entertainment rooms, in various states of blush and undress. Most are nude.

The room you are brought to is right at the top of the brothel, where the Madame keeps her office, and her favourite pets. It is clean, and scented by the flowers about the place. The bed itself, for there is always a bed, is covered in soft pink curtains, pulled back and tied with silver ribbon. There are no windows, and no fireplace.

“Only the best for the princess, eh? You’re lucky I did the Madame a favour.”

He has already pulled off his tunic, and sits upon the bed, pulling you onto him so your legs wrap around his waist,

“What did you do?”

“Killed her husband.”

You look up at him, pouting slightly.

“Why?”

“Because-” In an instant, his great body is atop of you, and you are slammed against the fabric of the bed. The thing itself creaks. “Your grandfather told me to.”

Gregor’s lips find your neck, his facial hair tickles against the skin, and you let yourself laugh,

“And you do everything the great Lord Tywin tells you to?”

The response you get is a grunt, and a squeal from your own lips when he pulls you closer toward him. You gain a kiss upon the lips for this intrusion.

“I do whilst I’ve his pretty granddaughter in a whorehouse.”

As he continues to put kisses on your exposed skin, travelling almost as low as your breast, you suddenly realise you’ve found yourself in an unusual position of power. In a whorehouse, on your back, with a man double your weight and at least a foot taller than you upon you. This is the power your mother has told you a woman holds.

“His pretty granddaughter, your princess. You should be serving me.”

You tilt your head away so he cannot see the smile which graces your face. He merely hums, near thoughtfully. Once again, you are lifted from below him, and put back on the throne you’ve made from his thighs.

“How does my princess want served, then?”

His free hand finds yours, and you play with it like a child might a shiny thing they find upon the pavement.

“Your fingers.”

“Aye, that’s a good plan,” He shakes his hand free from yours with little effort, it joins with the other at the small of your back, and poor Dana’s dress is torn to rags, leaving you in your little nightdress, the front having been pulled down completely, exposing your breasts to him. He says nothing. “Better get you prepared first, can’t bring you back split like a chicken, can I?”

“Are you… that big?”

Your eyes widen at your own speech, how utterly unashamed you can be. There is little more you can do to sully your reputation at this point than to actually have the man inside of you, and you aren’t completely sure you won’t. But he finds some amusement in your words, grasping you gently, pulling you closer toward him.

“All of me is big, Princess.”

He is right, his hands are each the size of your face, if not bigger. His height is something known and feared by every man, woman and child in the Seven Kingdoms, and you sit delicately on his lap, growing increasingly excited by the ideas of what he might do to you.

One of those big hands grazes your bare arse underneath your nightdress, even the gentlest squeeze, with his strength, turns into a reasonably harsh pinch. You squeak,

“Ow!”

Gregor tuts,

“If that hurts you, Princess, I doubt you’re ready for the next bit.”

It travels back down, across your thigh, and sets itself, with the amount of grace you expect from Gregor, just shy of your cunt. He helps you settle in a more comfortable position, and pushes his middle finger into you. It hurts, even his fingers are enormous, far greater than your own, but it feels wonderful. You must be whimpering, because he shushes you with kisses, moving slowly and carefully, not daring to give you another one.

A second has you sobbing, quietly begging for him to stop. He won’t, you know that, and most of you doesn’t want him to.

By the time he considers you ‘adequately prepared’, you are hardly sure of your own name, let alone anything more complicated. You are covered in sweat, a scarlet blush across your whole face, and an overwhelming sense that you should probably be quite ashamed of yourself.

Gregor sets you down from his lap, onto the bed. You hope the night’s activities aren’t over, you do so want what you were certain he’d give you. He seems to notice, a smile graces his face.

“Just a minute, Princess,” He sounds almost scolding, like a schoolmaster, “Can’t fuck you dressed, can I?”

“I… Suppose not, no.”

Whilst you still have some shred of dignity, even if your nightdress clings to the sweat on your skin, and leaves next to nothing to anyone’s imagination, Gregor strips himself down to his entirety. Every scar, every muscle of his is completely visible, and something about it completely delights you.

He almost laughs at how you gawk at him, eyes flicking between his legs, trying desperately not to show him you are, in fact, staring.

“Never seen a cock before?”

“Not… One I’m not directly related to, no.”

You are scooped back into his arms, onto your throne of flesh. Your Mountain bounces you just slightly, and you recall a nurse of yours doing the exact same thing at some point in your life. There is something oddly comforting about it.

He expects you to squeal and cry when it begins, when he pushes himself into you. And you do, just a little. There is a pressure you cannot quite explain, something eats at you from inside out, and your eyes fill up with pretty tears. He is there to make it better, of course, it is his duty to protect you.

Gregor is not the type of man to praise his woman, and he doesn’t. Not in words, at least. You cling to him, wrapped around his neck and whimpering into his shoulder, and he runs a hand up your clothed back in long, soothing motions. It does little to actually comfort you, but the thought behind it is nice. You are glad it’s this, and not the horror stories you’ve heard about your sworn guardian.

You know, in very limited detail, how a woman is supposed to give herself up to a man. You had thought it would hurt- That he would be rough, and you look down to see no blood, nor much of anything, his cock is hidden by the skirts of your nightdress. You wonder if that is enough to hide your sin from the gods.

“Alright, Princess?”

You cannot even look up to see his face, and you don’t know he’d want you to. Tears stream freely from your eyes, and all of you feels heavy, tired. You hope he’ll carry you back home.

“Nearly.”

The break in his voice does not escape you. At least you know what’s to happen.

And slowly, carefully, his hand on your back finds your thigh, and the one on your thigh crawls between your legs. You are already prepared, already overwhelmed, and just the slightest touch is enough to set you off again,

“Hold off, Princess,” Had you the strength, you would beg him not to stop. Thankfully, he doesn’t, “Just one minute.”

And you try, but it is just too much for you to handle. You attempt to tell him, to give him some warning, but he knows.

He comes with a great roar, something that makes you jump. Gregor holds you tight enough to bruise, a reminder of his power, of how vulnerable you actually are, but you hardly care.

Despite the very obvious plug between your legs, his seed still seeps out of you, onto your nice nightdress, onto him. You hadn’t thought it’d be so messy, but it does make some sense. You mutter something unintelligible, and he kisses your forehead. The world is good, and you wonder if anyone would find out should you make this a regular occurrence.

You awake the next morning in a different, more sensible nightdress. You smell clean, like lavender soap, like he’s had one of your ladies bathe you at some point. One enters with a breakfast tray, as per usual, and you pretend not to notice how she avoids your gaze. The two who help you dress are as chatty as usual. The older woman is as bubbly as ever, and her little assistant couldn’t frighten a sparrow if she wanted.

Gregor is usually standing outside when you emerge in the mornings. Today, it is Ser Meryn Trant. Not unusual, and nothing for concern; you assume Gregor has come down with a headache again. He suffers from them quite frequently, especially so in the hottest months.

Neither of you say anything, not until you’ve crawled down the steps and gotten to the throne room. Your muscles still ache, and your legs feel strange to walk upon, a night of being bent and thrown in any direction.

Tywin and Cersei are on either side of the throne; your mother sits, your grandfather stands. Your brother is tactfully in the corner, with his dog behind him. And the way Sandor looks at you, with undisguised disgust, you realise- they know.

Tywin’s face is still, your mother looks as though she might boil up at any given moment. The throne is empty, and you wonder where your father has gone.

“Princess,” It is Varys who speaks. Your mother’s little songbird, with nothing better to do than scour the kingdom for rumour, “We had heard some… rumours regarding your activities last night with Ser Gregor.”

You realise, this is your time to shine. You have always been dramatic, always good at making up little stories. You can fool your grandfather, you’ve always been able to. And if Lord Tywin is convinced, the rest of them shall follow; no-one doubts the Hand.

“W-What rumours, my lord?”

Cersei rolls her eyes. Your mother stands, moving down from the raised steps of the throne, facing you,

“You know what rumours. You were seen in a brothel last night, far past the time you should have been abed, and he carried you back half-naked. Do you deny it, Daughter?”

“I…”

You look between those in the throne room: your brother in the corner, his dog avoiding your gaze; Varys, and Littlefinger, your mother. Your gaze lands on Ser Meryn.

“Ser Gregor does not guard me at night.” You look at your grandfather, a sudden realisation coming upon you. “He is my personal guard, Grandfather, the Kingsguard have night duty. He needs to be rested for the day.”

Cersei flicks her head to Tywin, who appears to be thinking quite deeply,

“That is true, Ser Gregor has yet to be granted the white cloak.”

“Do you doubt my virtue, Grandfather? You know I would not lie on such matters, I am a princess, not a tavern wench.”

And he sighs, and you know that you’ve won him over,

“It is possible Ser Gregor entertained a woman of a- Similar appearance. The princess is not so foolish as to risk rumours of her purity, unlike some.”

A comment about your mother. You see Sandor smirk at it.

You are returned back to your bedchamber, and go about your day. The rumours are put aside, and it is decided that Gregor entertained a whore that night, no matter what anyone claims. There are plenty of men who take silver-haired whores as Targaryens, after all, there is hardly a difference with the new line of regency.

Later, you are put in front of your father after supper. He’s heard, of course, through Varys, or Tywin or Cersei, or all of the above. Not that it matters.

Robert is arse-deep in his cups, and he doesn’t show any sign of stopping. Your father wraps one of his great hands around your shoulders,

“Did you fuck him, then?”

And there is no answer you can give him but the truth.

“Aye, Father, I did.”

Robert spends the rest of the evening laughing uncontrollably, getting suitably drunk. Your nights with Gregor confine themselves to your rooms, or to a variety of places where a princess would not be so out of place. Everyone knows, and no one says a word. And one day, when your husband of a cushy, lordly house gives you child after child, no one shall say a word when they each emerge taller than the next, when their resemblance is shockingly similar to your personal guard, and not their supposed father.

#game of thrones x reader #got x reader #game of thrones #game of thrones x y/n #got #house clegane #clegane #gregor clegane x reader #gregor clegane #game of thrones x reader smut #got smut #request #requested #I think I might just be a Greggie C writer now #And yk what?#If this is how the gods gave me my talent I'll take it #live laugh greggie c

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robin-evry · 4 months ago

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𝐖𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐈𝐅 𝐘𝐔𝐔 𝐈𝐒 𝐀 𝐘𝐔𝐊𝐈 𝐎𝐍𝐍𝐀 ❄️

Yuki-onna (雪女, lit. 'snow woman') is a spirit or yōkai in Japanese folklore that is often depicted in Japanese literature.Yuki-Onna are cryokinetic beings, meaning that they have absolute control over ice and snow. They have the power to control blizzards, and cause people who set foot in snowy mountains to get lost and then invite them to their homes. Ice Claws: In their true forms, Yuki-Onna can create enormous ice claws.

When the coffin opened a gust of snow burst out and filled the entire orientation room, students shivered at the change of the Atmosphere and yuki onna!yuu step out of the coffin with snow falling on them.

Yuki onna!Yuu demeanor would be much more tranquil, maintaining a cool and collected exterior in even the most chaotic situations. Their presence could have a calming effect on those around her, often soothing tempers or calming arguments.

While still compassionate, Yuki Onna!Yuu would be more reserved, speaking softly but with wisdom and elegance.

Just like the nurturing relationship with Grim, Yuki Onna!Yuu would be even more protective, acting like a silent guardian for those they cares about, similar to a mother figure, but in a more ethereal, distant way.

They appear calm and collected on the surface, their cold aura symbolizing their control. However, beneath this icy demeanor lies a whirlwind of emotions that only a few can sense. When pushed too far, their magic flares out uncontrollably, freezing everything around her. They ater feels guilty about losing control, but Grim reassures them that it’s natural.

Despite their icy nature, yuki onna!yuu treasures warmth, both emotional and physical. They secretly loves cozy places, hot chocolate, and warm blankets but is too embarrassed to admit it. Grim often catches them sneaking into the kitchen late at night to warm up by the stove or huddle by the dorm’s fireplace. It becomes their little secret.

Yuki onna!Yuu doesn’t give traditional gifts. Instead, they creates delicate ice sculptures for those they care about. These aren’t just simple ice shapes—they’re intricate, personal creations that melt away after a few hours, leaving only the memory. For example, they once made an ice sculpture of a lion for Leona, who scoffed at first but secretly admired it. They also made one of the Queen of Hearts for Riddle, which left him speechless.

They have a fascination with the stars, they learn astronomy in their free time, many students like ace,deuce, epel, grim, malleus sit beside them and admire the stars or they just listen to yuki Onna! Yuu yapped about the stars and their name

Vil secretly admires Yuki onna!Yuu’s ethereal beauty and control over ice, seeing them as an embodiment of grace and perfection. He often offers them advice on refining their appearance, though he never says it outright. They appreciates it, even if they don’t always follow his suggestions.

While they're powers are often misunderstood as simply cold or distant, her friends come to realize that their ice represents their quiet strength. Like ice that seems fragile but can cut deep, they resolve is firm and unbreakable when it comes to protecting those she loves.

Yuki onna!yuu is also a powerful sword master, their sword style is sending quick and deadly slashes towards the enemy, their sword art is focused on sending deadly and elegant movements as if they're dancing.

Epel admired them for it, they are strong and elegant at once, serene and yet dangerous. Epel sometimes goes to ramshackle to watch yuki onna! yuu training and wanted to learn sword style.

Yuki Onna!Yuu has an affinity for ice and snow magic, able to conjure snowstorms or freeze objects at will. Their magic can be subtle, like the soft falling of snow, or overwhelming, like a blizzard. They often use their ice powers creatively, such as forming delicate sculptures, creating protective ice barriers, or freezing paths to make escape routes.

Even tho yuki onna!yuu has an affinity for ice and snow magic. They are still able to cast spells and use other magic.

Yuki onna!yuu is the embodiment of two other sides of a quarter, they are elegant and serene but yet also powerful and dangerous similar towards the snow.

Yuki onna!yuu are described to be beautiful and carry the aura of elegance but still carry an aura of ice, when they walk in an area or a room the room temperature starts to go down.

They are able to turn their into snow, making them impossible to damage, they use this ability as a way to transport in a fast paste as well a way to repair any damages in their body.

They're heart is like a frost flower—beautiful and delicate, but often overlooked due to its cold exterior. They longs for a deep connection with others but struggles to let anyone in for fear of getting hurt. As for their bond with Grim deepens, they begins to thaw, ever so slowly. There’s a quiet part of her that wishes they could be more like him—open, carefree, and accepting of warmth.

As a Yuki Onna, they have a love for delicate, ethereal forms of art, such as traditional Japanese ink wash painting and calligraphy. They often create their own pieces using a combination of calligraphy and ice, leaving behind frozen scrolls that hold fleeting memories or feelings.

Not to mention, yuki onna!yuu can adapt and stay calm in any tough situation. As well an amazing strategist able to crack up a plan to counter the situation immediately.

#not canon #twisted wonderland #twst headcanons #twst scenario #disney twst #twisted wonderland yuu au #twst mc #twst wonderland #twst x reader #twst yuu au #yuki onna!yuu

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fictionalmenplz · 5 months ago

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Haven't picked a name for this bear/thanator species, but here it is! (And some more info)

Habitat?

Mountain caves

Underground dirt caves (specifically for nesting and caring for newborn cubs)

Sometimes above ground nests which are commonly used by new adult males who are discovering independence.

Hostile?

Friendly towards Olumbatka who sometimes share cave systems.

Rarely seen in open ground, but avoid those who they see unless provoked, then they will threaten attack.

They love to laze around in their caves, most of the female bear/thanator's stay together like female lions, the men are independent and do not like to be near other fully matured males, as they could easily challenge them.

Appearance?

They are dark violet, leading to slight discoloration on the tail, legs, nose, eyelids, queue, and head decor.

On the side of their arms they have thick skin like armor in pointed shapes, with teal/green edges that glow in the caves and night.

A distinct feature of these creatures is the blue lightning stripes that run down their forehead to the back and occasionally the tail. The lightning wraps around their forearms and calves.

The male bear/thanator's have longer forearms and thinner, more ornate lightning designs. Their claws are much more bright and teal as well.

They have six eyes, each benefiting their sight in the dark. The biggest eyes have oddly shaped pupils, they do not see in accurate color, everything is more saturated and yellow tinted.

The flaps and thick tendrils that extend are for threat and show, males are more decorated with them and have more design to impress females.

They have four lip flaps that curl up, and one that folds under their chin to bare their teeth, which are dark teal.

Carnivore/herbivore?

They like to eat Nantang and Pa'li, mainly Nantang because they are small. Sometimes Pa'li when they are alone.

They like meat but also are absolutely in love with fruits and berries. The fruit that Jake eats in the beginning of the first movie is their guilty pleasure, anytime they find a patch of them they go crazy and binge.

They never eat Na'vi, they have such a strong connection with the Olumbatka that they just avoid confrontation with them, they growl or hiss when one might be annoying them and they simply turn and leave to cool off.

Extra?

They run fast, not quite as fast as a Thanator but still very impressive for their size and weight.

In order to tame them the Olumbatka paint a glowing liquid across their body in lightning like patterns that should be identical to the bear they are trying to bond with, they have to get the creature used to their presence and appearance so they know they are not going to harm them. It could take hours, or days for the creature to accept them but once it is completed they will be loyal for as long as they are alive. This includes a hunting partner, a protector in the night, a friend, and a sibling in spirit.

#avatar #blue people avatar #james cameron avatar #jake sully #artists on tumblr #metkayina #original character #digital oc art #bear #thanator #nantang #subspecies

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broke-art · 2 years ago

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Azure lion x reader

Your giggles stole your breath as you raced down the mountain side only to feel an arm around your waist tug you backwards against a firm chest.

A low chuckle sounding near your ear.

"Surely, you didn't think you could outrun me."

You laughed feeling the man who held you so close rest his head on your shoulder.

"Of course not. But the game is more fun when I try."

The man released his hold on your waist only to guide you in a graceful twirl.

"I suppose you're correct as always." He said lovingly.

You went to look at him but that instant lightning struck awaking you from your dream with a violent jolt upward.

You glanced around then sighed annoyedly. This dream had haunted you for years now. Only bits more being revealed every time you dreamt it. Your mysterious suitor you had never once seen but he was a constant in this reoccurring dream often just beyond your sight.

He seemed more familiar than you could place though. Despite knowing you had never met him, something seemed so constant.

"Mm y/n you good?" Mei asked groggily as she sat up in her sleeping bag. She had slept over since she was going to 'enlist you' to fight the new bad guy. But she'd arrived late so you two would leave in the morning.

"Huh. Yeah Mei I'm fine." You murmured. Realizing your cheeks felt like they were on fire.

"Wait. Why are you all red then?" Mei asked confusedly.

You started a bit. Before getting out of bed.

"Oh I'm just overheated. I'll grab some water and be right back."

"Okie." Mei allowed a yawn to spill from her lips before settling back into bed.

You walked down stairs your mind flashing back to your dream. Of course he wasn't real but- you could almost feel his arm around your waist and his chin on his shoulder.

Feeling butterflies spark to life in your stomach you shook your head. That was ridiculous. Your parents would surely ask you to see a therapist if they'd known.

You grabbed a cup of water then walked back into your room. Mei was fast asleep.

With a sigh you realized sleep would likely not come for hours yet. Glancing at the balcony you considered stepping out for just a bit. With a touch to your cheeks you certainly hoped the night's brisk wind could cool you off.

You stepped out onto the balcony and walked to the railing and folded your arms leaning on it. You lifted your chin looking towards the skies. What could you possibly do against someone who could take on M.k and win? You weren't sure but you'd give it your all.

Just then a glimmer in the distance caught your eye and you frowned on concentration. It looked like a bird with golden wings. With a small gasp you realized it must be the demon henchmen of the bad guy Mei had told you about.

You went back inside and changed into a black outfit with a black hood, and snuck back out to the balcony. The bird seemed to be looking for something. You chanced a look back at Mei.

She'd probably want to fight him, which you had no intention of doing. You only wanted to spy on him. The more information you had on your foe the more likely you were to win.

So you jumped the railing and parkoured to the ground racing in the direction of the bird all the while keeping to the shadows.

You made it to the park before ducking into a bush. The bird was much larger than you'd initially imagined. Taller than a normal man and with sharp talons and golden wings.

He circled over the park seemingly still searching for something. Although you weren't sure what just yet. Just then his gaze snapped to you and you flinched violently.

With a smirk he flew at you. Panickedly you dove out of the way just before he crushed the bush.

He chuckled.

"Well what do we have here? A little spy?!" He grabbed you collar just as you got to your feet and lifted you up so suddenly your hood fell back.

He gave a small start then grinned evilly.

"Well well well, what a surprise."

You frowned in confusion but before you could speak he spread his wings again and shot upward.

Meanwhile

Azure was set on ensuring the celestial realm had no hope of a coup in the early stages of his reign. His mind still wandered back to M.k. his alleged 'nephew' of sorts could be a major issue come time. The boy was too headstrong for his own good, and it would be such a pity to have to end his life when it was still so young.

His distress and frustration must have shown because Peng and yellow fang had given him ample space since he'd ascended to the role of the new Jade emperor.

"Let go of me!" A girl's shout shattered his musings as the door to the throne room opened. "Let go! When I get out of these ropes you're a dead man!" A young woman shouted thrashing against the ropes that held her hands behind her back. Her hood casting a thick shadow over her features.

Peng held her by the back of her jacket as he stepped into the throne room.

Azure stood.

"Peng, what is the meaning of this?!" He demanded stepping from his throne.

"Forgive me, my emperor." Peng said with a bow. "I was on my rounds when I found this spy." He gestured to the girl still writhing in his hold. "And besides you were so upset I thought perhaps a present would improve your mood." With that he pulled back the hood.

Azure gasped as the shadows fell away to reveal the face of his lost love.

Still she squirmed but now Peng placed her down with a small shove towards him.

She stumbled and Azure found himself holding out his hands as if to catch her gently.

You caught your footing and looked up only to freeze. You hadn't imagined the bad guy to look so....concerned. his brow was furrowed in worry and his hands were outstretched as if to catch you.

Your captor stood and walked back out of the throne room behind you.

"I'll leave you two to get more aquatinted." He smirked over his shoulder before closing the door.

"Y/n?" The lionesque figure asked capturing your attention once again.

"How do you know my name?!" You demanded twisting your wrists in their bonds.

The lion chuckled almost sadly.

"You could say I knew you, once."

You glared at him.

"So a past life."

He nodded with a smile.

"Yes."

Just then, like lightning in your veins, a sense of realization and horror slipped through you. The dreams.

Suddenly your mind flashed through your most recent and many other dreams you'd had filling in the blanks with his form, his smile, his eyes.

"No...oh no." You whispered.

The lion smirked and folded his arms.

"I know that look, you haven't entirely forgotten me, now have you?"

You felt your gut roil at the implications. But then you set your eyes on him defiantly.

"That isn't me anymore. Whoever I was then, whoever you were, they're long gone."

His smile fell into a serious line.

"You're right." He stepped forward. "That was then and this is now."

You felt your heart race as he took your chin in hand.

"I once thought to have you back was impossible, that defeating the Jade emperor was impossible, but now I know better." His gaze softened and his hold on your chin remained gentle.

"My friends will stop you." You replied boldly.

The lion sighed.

"You'll learn in time." He then snapped and a rune appeared beneath your feet teleporting you to a fancy bedroom clearly meant for one person.

Peng, as the lion had called him, stood by the door and shut it firmly as you heard a lock click.

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pompomqt · 1 month ago

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Journey to the West Chapter 65

Wukong when he has to rescue Tripitaka from the 10th demon trap he's fallen into this month because he refused to listen to him:

Welcome back to this weeks chapter of Journey to the West with @journeythroughjourneytothewest. This week do the Pilgrims actually arrive at their destination, the Thunderclap Monastery? Let's find out.

After the gang has traveled peacefully for a while, they run into yet another mountain, this one is particularly tall. In fact while they were talking about it I wondered if they were talking about Mt. Everest, turns out no- instead they are apparently at Mount Kunlun. After a quick scuffle between Pigsy and Sandy, the group proceeds to climb the mountain, while being suitably wary of lions and tigers and bears oh my. Luckily Monkey is around to scare off any normal hungry creatures and they are able to reach the summit without incident.

At the summit they see a magnificent building, surrounded by divine light and the sound of harmonious bells. Despite how tempting the place looks, Tripitaka asks Monkey to take a closer look to see what kind of place it is. I mean- he isn't going to listen to Monkey anyways, but at least he asked? So Monkey takes a look and decides that despite being a very beautiful place that reminds him of Thunderclap Monastery somehow, it still feels shady to him somehow, so they should probably be careful.

Tripitaka however is to excited by the idea that this could be the end of his journey, and asks if this place could actually be Thunderclap Monastery. Monkey however claims that it isn't, since he's actually been to the Thunderclap Monastery plenty of times before, and this place isn't it. Despite that the pilgrims decide to take a closer look, and when they arrive at the door they see the words 'The Thunderclap Monastery'. Which causes Tripitaka to fall off his horse in astonishment and yell at Monkey for trying to deceive him. Monkey tells him to cool it, and maybe finish reading the sign before he starts leveling accusations at him.

And indeed there is a forth word that Tripitaka missed in his excitement- this is actually The 'Small' Thunderclap Monastery. Despite this, Tripitaka still insists that they should go inside, because even if it isn't THE Thunderclap Monastery it probably still has an important Buddhist Patriarch inside. Monkey warns him one last time, that this place is trouble, and not to come crying to him when he gets kidnapped again. Tripitaka still insists that they go, since if nothing else he still has his vow about bowing to any Buddhist image he see's, and there is surely one here.

Once they enter the gate, a booming voice greets them, calling out the Tang Monk and telling him not to be insolent. Tripitaka, Pigsy, and Sandy all bow in proper respect, while Wukong tends to the luggage and horse, presumably while rolling his eyes at the latest demon's theatrics. Once inside the grand hall, they see the five hundred arhats, the three thousand guardians of faith, the four great diamond kings, the mendicant nuns and the upaskas, along with some normal monks and workers. And up on the spiritial platform sits Buddha himself! When they see this, the three of them all go into deep bows, while Wukong stays standing. The supposed Buddha calls him out for this of course, but Monkey isn't going to bow to someone just because they are disguised as the Buddha, you have to actually trap him under a mountain for five hundred years to earn that privileged.

Unsurprisingly, Wukong does not care to for being called out by a fake Buddha, and immediately takes out his staff and goes for the kill. This fake Buddha, while not having a spare mountain to crush Wukong under, does have some golden cymbals, which fall onto Monkey and enclose him inside, the edges sealing together. Which I find to be a particularly ironic imagery, mainly because of that one toy with the Monkey and the cymbals, you know? Anyway with Monkey captured, Sandy and Pigsy try and reach for their weapons, but all three of them are quickly overwhelmed by the people in the monastery and are captured. It turns out that the fake Buddhist is actually a monster king, with all the arhats and such being his minion demons. Gasp, who could have seen this one coming? Besides Sun Wukong of course.

The demons pack up, and lock up the three pilgrims, while cymbals trapping Monkey are placed on the jeweled platform, and they expect him to be reduced to pus and blood within three days and nights, so that they can eat the other pilgrims unimpeded. Oh, and they also take the horse and luggage to I guess.

Monkey meanwhile is trying everything he can think of to break out of the golden cymbals. Striking at it with his staff, only to not leave a dent, growing and shrinking in size only to have the cymbal grow and shrink with him, and transforming some of his hairs into tools to try and drill or puncture a hole in the cymbals. Out of options of what he can try himself, he summons the gods that are on Tripitaka babysitting duty.

The gods aren't particularly happy to be summoned away from Tripitaka when the risk of him being eaten is currently very high, and asks why Monkey summoned them away at this critical moment. Monkey however also isn't particularly happy with Tripitaka at the moment for refusing to listen to him and getting them stuck in this position in the first place. So he just tells them, that if Tripitaka dies, he dies, so they should just focus on getting him out of these cymbals so he can just handle everything.

The gods try and pry the cymbals open, but can't even budge them. The gods inform Monkey that they don't know what kind of sacred treasure the cymbals are, but they've completely fused together now, and are one piece. For now the gods decide to send some of them back to watch over Tripitaka, while some stay to watch the cymbals, they also send someone to go to the Jade Emperor to ask for help. The God gives the Jade Emperor the run down of the situation, and the Jade emperor sends the twenty eight constellations to help.

The constellations arrive and tell Monkey they are here to help. Monkey tells them to use their weapons to bust him out, but they tell him that if they make to much noise they'll alert the guards. Instead they'll try to use their weapons to puncture it, since Monkey will be able to escape through even the tiniest gap. Monkey agrees, but despite the gods giving it their best, Monkey doesn't see any gaps to escape through. Finally the Gullet of the Gold Dragon says that the treasure he is trapped in, also posses the power of transformation. So he's going to to use the tip of his horn to see if he can try and wedge it inside.

So the dragon wedges his horn inside, while Monkey feels the edges between the cymbals. He manages to stick his horn inside, however the cymbal fuses around it, and no gap is formed. Monkey however, is able to feel the edge of the horn, and uses his staff to drill a hole in the horn, and shrink to fit inside. After that, the dragon pulls his horn, and Monkey, out of the cymbal, freeing him. Good job team, great group effort all around!

Of course as soon as Monkey is out of the cymbal, he smashes it into gold dust, which does indeed alert every single demon in the hideout, including the demon king. The Demon King challenges Wukong to a duel and declares that he is Old Buddha of Yellow Brows, and if Wukong can defeat him, he'll let them go, if not he'll kill them all and receive the scriptures from Buddha himself. Wukong, never one to turn down a fight, takes this challenge. The two fight for a while, until the gods that came to Wukong's aid earlier try to join in on the fight. However, now that Wukong and his allies are nicely clumped together, Yellow Brow takes a white cloth wrap from his waist and uses it to scoop up and trap Wukong and his allies.

Rather then just leaving them in the wrap however, Yellow Brow orders his minion demons to take them out and tie them up individually. However it looks like just being in the wrap for a short time did a real number on them anyways, since the deities are all in rough shape. While Wukong is tied up with the rest of the deities, he hears the sound of Tripitaka softly crying. Saying that he hates himself for not listening to Wukong, and now Wukong is probably hurt and trapped in the cymbals. This is enough for Wukong to forgive him for not listening to him and getting them all into this mess, and Wukong resolves to rescue them all right away.

So Monkey just shrinks himself to remove the ropes, and then goes to Tripitaka and quietly announces his presence to him. Tripitaka asks how he escaped and Monkey gives him the quick rundown, after which Tripitaka begs Monkey to rescue them, and promises to listen to him from now on. We'll have to see how long that will last, nevertheless Monkey unties everyone and they make their escape. On the way out, Monkey remembers that the demon's still have all their stuff, so he sends everyone out while he stays back to get their luggage back.

So Monkey transforms into a bat in order to search the place, and is able to find their stuff pretty easily, helped along by the fact that Tripitaka's fancy cassock apparently glows. Monkey however makes a rookie mistake when trying to steal their stuff back, he doesn't check to make sure their stuff is probably attached to the pole. So when he lugs it all over his shoulder, the luggage slips right off with a loud thud, that once again awakens every monster in the vicinity. The demon's immediately find out that all their prisoners have escaped, and order demons to guard all the doors, which causes Monkey to cut his losses and escape without the luggage. With the demon king giving chase right behind him.

The Demon King catches up to where Tripitaka and the others fled to, so Pigsy, Sandy and all of the celestial go to battle the Demon King, who quickly summons his own demons to fight in a battle royal. Pigsy asks Monkey where all their stuff is, and Monkey says that he was lucky enough to escape even without the luggage. The battle between the two forces, last all day, but when it starts getting late, the Demon King gets bored I guess, and once again takes out the white wrap. Monkey has seen this move before and doesn't care to be a part of the sequel, so he jumps clear and tries to shout out a warning to everyone else. However no one else is able to respond in time, leading to everyone but Wukong getting captured again.

Tripitaka, Sandy and Pigsy are left to dangle from the rafters while their horse is tied up and all the deities are tied up and thrown in a cellar. Leaving Monkey alone to contemplate Tripitaka's rotten luck in life. After Monkey thinks on the problem at hand for a while, he settles on going to get the help of the True Warrior of the north.

Current Sun Wukong Stats: Names/Titles: Monkey, The Stone Monkey, The Handsome Monkey King, Sun Wukong (Monkey awakened to the void), Bimawen (Banhorseplague), The Great Sage Equal To Heaven and Pilgrim Sun. Immortality: 5 + 94,000 years Weapon: The Compliant Golden Hooped Rod Abilities: 72 Transformations, Cloud-Somersault, Ability to transform his individual hairs, super strength, Ability to Summon Wind, Water restriction charm, and the ability to change into a huge war form, ability to duplicate his staff, ability to immobilize others, the ability to put others to sleep, and the Fiery eyes and Diamond Pupils, intimidating horses, churning large bodies of water, sleeplessness, seizing the wind, enhanced smell, discerning good and evil within a thousand miles, Spirit Summoning, lock picking, object transformation, distance reduction, vanishing in a flash of light, super healing, transforming others, Invisibility, and Wind Immunity Demon Kill Count: 11 + Unknown Number of Minions Human Kill Count: 1039 God's Defeated: 23 + Unknown number Defeats: 7 Crime List: Robbery, Murder, Mass Murder, Arson, Theft, Coercion, Threatening a Government Official, Resisting Arrest, Assault, Forgery, Employee Theft, False Imprisonment, Impersonating a Government Official, Treason, attempted murder, failure to control or report a dangerous fire, desecrating a corpse, breaking and entering, trespassing, violating Tree Law, looting corpses, trading counterfeit goods, criminal threat, animal abuse, Assisting or Instigating Escape, Damage to Religious Property, contaminating a substance for human consumption, Identity Fraud, Disorderly Conduct and Joyriding Cry Count: 9 + 3 fake cries Mountains Trapped Under: 4

Current Tang Sanzang stats: Names/Titles: River Float, Xuanzang, Tang Sanzang, Tripitaka and the Tang Monk Abilities: Curing Blindness, making branches point a certain direction (allegedly), reciting sutras, pretty privilege, memorization, Heart Sutra, Meditation, and Being Heaven's Specialist Little Guy Cry Count: 34 Tight Fillet Spell Uses: 63 Paralyzed by fear: 6 Bandit Problems: 3 Kidnapped by demons: 11 Falling Off Horses: 11

Current Bai Long Ma Stats: Names/Titles: Bai Long Ma (White Dragon Horse), Prince of the Western Ocean, and third prince jade dragon of the dragon king Aorun Abilities: Transforming into a human, a water snake, and a horse, eating a horse in one bite, flight, Magic of Water Restriction, Singing, and Sword Dancing. Cry Count: 1 Crime List: Arson, and Grave Disobedience. Contributions to the plot: 3 Kidnapped by demons: 3

Current Zhu Wuneng Stats: Names/Titles: The Marshal of the Heavenly Reeds, Zhu Wuneng (Pig who is aware of ability), Zhu Ganglie, Pigsy, Idiot and Eight Rules. Weapon: Rake Abilities: 36 Transformations, parting water, fighting underwater, cloud soaring, size enhancement and CPR Demon Kill Count/Kill steals: 15 + Unknown number of minions Kidnapped by Demons: 7 Human Kill Count: 1 Failed Flirtation/romances Attempts: 4 Cry Count: 2 Crime List: Sexual Harassment, Murder, Kidnapping, arson, defamation, Damage to Religious Property, contaminating a substance for human consumption, Identity Fraud, Theft, Forcible entry, Disrupting a Funeral and Violating Tree Law

Current Sha Wujing Stats: Names/Titles: The Curtain-Raising General, Sha Wujing (Sand Aware of Purity), Sandy and Sha Monk Weapon: Monster Taming Staff Abilities: Fighting underwater, Cloud soaring, and fetching water from a well. Demon Kill Count: 1 + Unknown number of minions. Kidnapped by Demons: 5 Human Kill Count: 1 Cry Count: 1 Crime List: Breaking a Crystal Cup, murder, desecration of a human corpse, Damage to Religious Property and contaminating a substance for human consumption

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Art

#journey to the west #jttw read through #jttw #journeythroughjourneytothewest #sun wukong #tang sanzang #zhu wuneng #sha wujing #Tripitaka is back to falling off horses everyone!#Also it's nice to see that despite the fact that Monkey does in fact get sick of Tripitaka's shit sometimes #He's also very forgiving towards him lol #And will still rescue him every single time he gets himself and his crew kidnapped

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pastel-peach-writes · 1 year ago

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BAELOYYY YASSS!!! Would you be down to write some fluff👀 like aloy and fem!reader stumble upon a pretty lake or something and they're just messing around and maybe the reader get hit with a wave of mischief and pushes her in? Or!! Aloy teaches her how to override a little watcher to have a cute little buddy to keep them company and angjkwkw (can you tell that when i played the game i kept wishing that i could pet the watchers after i befriended them? lol) Thank youuu you're the best!! XD

Hiii! I'm so sorry I'm writing this late. I'm going to do both, but I'm really interested in a mischievous reader so i will do the first one. enjoy!

Cool Off | Aloy x Reader

╰┈➤ PLOT: It was supposed to be a relaxed day. After training for the Proving, you and Aloy decided it would be nice to have lunch by a secluded lake. Aloy isn't too fond of what follows.

╰┈➤ WARNINGS: No Use Of Y/n, Pre-Game One Discovery, Cursing

⍣ ೋ Enjoy!⍣ ೋ

The sun during high noon was nothing compared to the afternoon sun in the Sacred Lands. Though the sun wasn't exactly overhead, the closer it got to its sunset position, the brighter the sun shined. Its beams and rays on your skin made sweat beads appear on your forehead and roll down your face.

"Come on," Aloy's voice snapped you out of your misery. All you could hear was her items cling and clang against each other as you scaled a mountainside. The heavy swish of her leather and the smashing of the gravel underneath seemed familiar somehow. "It's not that far from here. You'll make it."

"Says you," you seethed. "Not all of us were blessed with an endurance only lions had. And not everyone has ridiculous leg muscles such as yours." You went on all fours to climb over a decent-sized rock, but its surface burned your skin. You winced and let go of the rock.

You lose your footing on the loose gravel and your heart sinks down to your stomach. You can't think of anything but your impending doom.

That is until there's a strong grip on your wrist.

Aloy pulled you up with a slight grunt. She shook her head with a teasing smile as she moved you beside her. "Hasn't anyone ever taught you not to talk shit while scaling a mountain?"

You narrowed your eyes. Of course, she would take this as a moment to mess with you. Despite the tensed jaw and urge to flick her ear, you're grateful for her fast reflexes.

Aloy was always the one to catch you before you fell or to get you out of trouble. You don't know how she does it.

It started when y'all were six.

She was training with Rost and you were with the grade-school kids. You wandered off, distracted by a butterfly and then the pretty flower it landed on. Engrossed in the beauty of nature, you didn't notice how far away you were from your group. Once you realized they were gone, it was too late.

Tears welled up in your eyes. The feeling of impending doom dawned upon you and you couldn't help but wail. You cried and cried as you sat flat on your tush.

Again, not aware of the things around you, you couldn't see that you were attracting the attention of a few watchers. How could you notice anyways? You were a kid who thought they lost their ticket home. You thought you were never going to see your family again.

Hell, you sure weren't as heavy footsteps of machinery quickly made their way toward you.

With tears clouding your eyesight, you turned around to see an alerted watcher running towards you. It was on a mission and you were its target.

You brought your arms up to block your face. Your heartbeat threatened to explode out of your chest and your tears were hysterical at this point.

You were never going to see your parents again. You were sure of it when the watcher came five feet within you.

But then all of a sudden, the watcher fell to its side. Almost as if it's been shot with something. You froze. This is what everyone saw before they died, right?

A small girl with red hair and a blue headpiece came running over to you.

At that moment, you couldn't decipher who she was or what she was saying. Everything was a blur and you felt as if you blacked out.

Eventually, an older man walked over and the three of you went to find your group. You were silent the whole time, but grateful. If it wasn't for that girl and her rocks, you would've been dead.

Since then, Aloy was always there to save you. You were sure it was exhausting for her. It was exhausting for you to get into trouble all the time. Eventually, you stopped getting yourself into danger less and less, but you never stopped seeing her. Even though she was shunned, you didn't care.

You two were attached by the hip.

Because Aloy was in tune with the constant danger that roamed the planet, you've always wanted to catch her off guard. Maybe you could do that now while the two of you are supposed to be "relaxing".

"Shut up, Aloy. Thank you for saving me." You let a smile show on your lips as you walked past her. At the top of wherever the hell Aloy wanted to take you was flat. There were bushes, rarely any trees, thin bushes, and a lake near the cliff edge.

The mountaintop wasn't a place for hiding, so there weren't any evil-ass robots trying to murder you either.

You sat at the edge of the lake. It was a beautiful deep blue and was surrounded by green florals. On occasion, there were some colorful flowers that peaked through the taller portions of the grass.

Aloy sat beside you, groaning like an old man as she did so. "Yeah, of course, but, you don't have to thank me. I appreciate it, but my saving you from the stupid danger you get yourself in is just something that comes with our friendship." With a small grin, she handed you a leather pouch full of food.

In a brief moment, your fingers grazed each other. Neither you nor Aloy flinched or shuddered from it. Finger grazing and long eye contact have been occurring a lot as of late. You didn't question it. You liked the butterflies the actions gave you or how your body felt warm all of sudden.

"Yeah, I know." You took a piece of bread out of the pouch and ripped off a bite.

You and Aloy sat at the lake eating for a while. There were moments of silence, moments of chewing, and moments of conversation. You two were happily laughing away with full bellies by the time you finished lunch.

Aloy sat crosslegged and rested back on her palms. You had your legs stretched out in front of you, crossed at the ankle. Mimicking her stance, you rested back on your palms.

"Ugh, it's so hot!" Aloy groaned. In her dramatics, she threw her head back. She closed her eyes shut as the sun beamed on her.

From the side, you could see she was sweating all the way from her hairline to the back of her neck. You couldn't blame her though. All the gear you had to wear got hot on the worst days and it's not like all the hair she had was keeping her cool either.

"You should cool down, Alo," you hummed. Your gaze remained on her as she shook her head like a toddler.

"I can't! It's too hot!" She fell onto her back. Exasperated, she wiggled her limbs around. "This grass is too itchy and my water isn't cold anymore!"

Laughter erupted from your stomach. You quickly cleaned up the remainder of your lunch. "You're so dramatic, Aloy. There are many ways you could cool down."

Aloy cricked her neck over to you with a pout on her lips. "How?"

"Well, as you mentioned, water." You shoved your trash into your pouch.

Aloy groaned. "You don't listen to me. I said my water isn't cold." Aloy stood from her place on the ground. She figured she should help you clean up instead of whining and rolling on the floor like a toddler.

The water in her flask wasn't the water you were talking about. For Gaia's sake, there's a whole ass lake in front of you two. A little dip in it won't hurt.

It took five minutes to clean up the trash and you would've been done quicker, but you kept messing with Aloy by throwing grass scraps at her or refusing to give her the pouch full of trash.

It was 5 pm now and the sun would be setting soon. Despite the cooler air that usually came around this time, Aloy was still hot. Her skin was sticky and dry, her face scratchy, and the clothes on her were giving her sensory nightmares.

She stood by the lake edge with her eyes closed. She tried to let the freshwater smell take her whole and calm her down, but just like her hair, her anger was firey.

You've been watching Aloy take deep breaths and trying everything she could to calm herself down.

For some reason, neither of you suggested going home.

You both liked the silence the mountaintop provided and the comfortability you two had away from other Noras. She could laugh and joke with you and you could be carefree and mindless with her. You both could be your authentic selves.

Aloy scowled, clenching her fists. You didn't have to see her know her nose was scrunched and her eyebrows furrowed together. You could also bet her lips tensed into a thin line. "Ugh, this sucks!"

"Relax, Aloy."

"I'm trying!" She whipped around to face you. "Can't you see that? This heat is unbearable. I physically can't calm or cool down."

Besides cutting off the oxygen, what was one way you could take out a fire?

Water.

As Aloy continued to ramble and yell about how she couldn't cool off and how unfair it is that she has a full stomach yet couldn't enjoy the feeling of being full, you charged forward.

She was too clouded by her fiery rage to notice.

In the middle of her rant, you pushed your firm hands on Aloy's abdomen. She screamed out your name, but it was drowned out by the enormous splash of the lake.

You hunched over, laughing and holding onto your stomach.

Aloy swam to the surface, her cheeks puffed up. Her freckled cheeks were red, but you couldn't tell if it was from anger or embarrassment. "What the fuck was that!"

Through your laughter, you reply, "You need some way to cool down, right? Why not go for a swim?"

Aloy smacked the water's surface. "This isn't funny! Stop laughing!"

Her water smack splashed some water your way, but you didn't mind. You weren't a typical fairytale witch. A bit of water won't kill you. "Oh, come on! You wanna laugh too," you leaned down with your hands on your thighs. "I can see it on your face."

No, what you saw on her face was the spark of a devious plan. Aloy reached out of the water and pulled you in. With another splash, Aloy erupted into laughter.

From beneath the water, you could hear her muffled laughter. Her laughter brought a natural smile to your face, but you had to pretend you were mad at her.

So, when you swam up to the surface, you feigned scowl. Aloy only laughed harder.

"Okay, I get it now!" the freckled girl said. "This is funny. Are you enjoying your swim?" Aloy taunted by sticking out her tongue. She had her arms crossed over her chest and a smile permanently plastered on her face.

If her pulling you into the lake is what it takes to get her to smile, so be it.

You responded with a shrug. A smile threatened its way through. "It could be better."

The golden light from the sun shined onto the water making it clear and crystal. Not to mention how the golden rays brightened up Aloy's hair and face. You never noticed how much darker her hair was when it was wet.

Because of the ethereal sight of Aloy, you couldn't help but admire her. Her green eyes stared back into yours with the same admiring glint.

She was having the same thoughts you were having about her skin, hair, and eyes. Staring into your eyes made time stop. She wouldn't dare to pass up the opportunity of being in forever with you. "You look really pretty," Aloy whispered.

You snickered. "Pretty? That's all you got?" You swam closer to her.

Aloy shrugged, a shy but amused smile on her face. "What am I supposed to call you? Beautiful? Handsome? Charming?" She swam closer to you.

A simple pen could be used to measure the distance between you two.

She snaked her arms around your waist and you put your own around her neck. "Those would suffice." Your voice was softer than before. You made a note to speak slower for clarity, emphasis, and mood.

Similar to her smile, Aloy grinned. She leaned in and you could feel her breath on your skin.

You weren't sure if you were dreaming or hallucinating. Maybe you hit your head as you were pulled into the lake. You closed your eyes to scan your body for any signs of pain, but there weren't any. When you opened your eyes again, you could see Aloy's gaze never left yours.

Your breath hitched. Finally, you leaned in too, threatening to close the gap between you two.

You closed your eyes again, but this time to prepare yourself for the spectacular kiss that was to be blessed upon your lips.

Aloy's lips barely ghosted yours when she stopped. You opened your eyes to find her smirking at you. She pulled away, giving your sides a teasing squeeze.

Now it was your turn to feel fire all over your face and body. Suddenly, the lake's water wasn't doing any justice. "Aloy, you tease!" You huffed as you shoved her shoulders.

Aloy laughed. She stumbled back from your shove. "Oh, what? Did I do something? Was there something you want from me?"

You didn't dare to reply. Instead, you huffed and swam out of the lake. It was all in good fun, you knew that. But damn, it was embarrassing to have your crush know you want to kiss them.

Aloy followed after you, giggles and laughs escaping past her lips. "Hey, hey," she grabbed your wrist. She pulled you to her body and yet again, her eyes didn't dare to leave yours. "Don't be embarrassed, okay? I like you too."

"Who said I like you?" you scoffed.

Aloy looked you up and down. Her smirk made an appearance. "Your body language when we were in the lake. No one leans in, closes their eyes, and holds on tight to someone they don't like."

All you could do was pull away with a slight smile. "You're an asshole."

"Meh, but you like me and I like you too." Aloy wiped some of the water off your face. "Don't worry, Splash, you'll get your kiss soon."

WC: 2,436

#pastel-peach-writes #gender-neutral terms #pastel peach writes #gender neutral terms #aloy x reader #aloy horizon #aloy #aloy fanfic #horizon zero dawn fanfic #horizon zero dawn

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autobots-in-training · 4 months ago

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Do you guys like Canadian geese, this is an important question to me

First Aid- We've never seen them in perso-

Sideswipe- THEY FUCKING SUCK!

First Aid- Hey watch it! Illy and Roddy are on the other side of the room, they'll hear you!

Sideswipe- Those geese fucking suck!!

Sunstreaker- They only suck to you because you were bothering them.

Sideswipe- I wanted to see if the aggression was real or if our human guides were exagerating!!

Sunstreaker- Remember when you found a mountain lion and you wanted to bring it home?

Sideswipe- Y-yeah?

Sunstreaker- I think you're just an idiot when it comes to animals. its a miracle either of us is still here.

Sideswipe- What do you mean by that!?

First Aid- Guys-

Sunstreaker- When we were on our own back on Cybertron, we were almost eaten by beasts because you couldn't leave them alone.

Sideswipe- No no no, we were almost eaten once, the other times we were just chased off by turbofoxes looking for food in the ruins of whatever city we were in!

Sunstreaker- Once is still too many times.

First Aid- Guys, the question was about canadian geese.

Sunstreaker- Oh right. They're cool if you leave them alone.

Sideswipe- They are not afraid of beings that are 20x their size.

First Aid- Geeze, you guys get off topic so much.

Sunstreaker, Sideswipe- Fuck you.

*end transmission*

#maccadam #transformers #first aid #sideswipe #sunstreaker #shatteredhope123 #ask #text answer

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ceph-the-ghost-writer · 8 months ago

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OC Interview

Tagged many moons ago by @orphanheirs! Rolled a die and it chose Elfy! (She'll be writing this rather than signing.)

Are you named after anyone?

Nope, not unless you count dolphins! My parents thought the full version, Delfina, looked similar to "dolphin". (They learned later it actually means "of Delphi", as in the ancient Greek archaeological site. Which they still thought was cool. It is.) Plus there aren't any other women in my family with that name. My nickname comes from the "elf" part of Delfina, and a childhood of being obsessed with fairytales and folklore. Having my head in the clouds, basically.

When was the last time you cried?

It was while laughing at Isaac the last time he went with me on an investigation. He's calm and casual around things like rattlesnakes, scorpions, even wolves and mountain lions. But he gets jumpy about the stuff he can't see--like ghosts! I had him do some EVP sessions, and he handled the recording equipment like it was rigged to explode.

Do you have kids?

No, but maybe some day. When I slow down a little. (And find someone who can co-parent with me.)

Do you use sarcasm a lot?

Not a lot, but my expression will let you know when I am!

What’s the first thing you notice about people?

Their body language and how they carry themselves. You can tell a lot about someone just by how they stand or sit. (Not their whole story obviously, but a general overview of their current situation.) If someone's stiff and proper, or slouched and worried, that type of thing.

What’s your eye colour?

They're brown, like most people's. What a weird question. Why isn't it ever about how long your eyelashes are? Or whether your eyes sparkle, or if they have creases at the corners from smiling? (Mine do, and I have medium length lashes.)

Scary movies or happy endings?

Scary! I'm in the Spirits Department for a reason.

Any special talents?

Finding trouble and giving it the slip afterwards, teehee.

Where were you born?

In Charlottesville, Virginia since my parents wanted to be close to family when they had me. I spent part of the summers there as a kid for the same reason, though I grew up around Chicago, Illinois for most of the year. Did you know that more cities in Virginia are named after women than any other state? Probably explains why I like them so much.

Do you have any pets?

I have a cat! His name is Scurvy because he has a patch of black that's right over one of his eyes. And he likes to play with/chew on limes whenever I have some on the kitchen counter.

What sort of sports do you play?

I joined a local soccer group briefly once. Mostly to hook up with a woman who was part of it, though.

How tall are you?

About 5'3", not counting my hair.

What was your favorite subject in school?

English and history because both involved stories about other people, and how they shaped the world.

What is your dream job?

I'm already doing it! (Though I'd never say no to a pay increase.)

Taglist and blank questions below

Dysthanasia Taglist: @thecyrulik @thatndginger @sunset-a-story @space-writes @scoundrelwithboba

Additionally: @nailamoonsi @meerawrites @wintherlywords @theprissythumbelina @elrallin

Blank questions:

When was the last time you cried? Do you have kids? Do you use sarcasm a lot? What’s the first thing you notice about people? What’s your eye colour? Scary movies or happy endings? Any special talents? Where were you born? Do you have any pets? What sort of sports do you play? How tall are you? What was your favorite subject in school? What is your dream job?

#writeblr #dysthanasia #oc interview

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the-lonelyshepherd · 1 month ago

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howdyy 3, 25, & 38 :-)

HOWDYYY :)))

3. 3 movies you could watch for the rest of your life and not get bored of?

NOPE, thoroughbreds probably, the lion king . had to put the lion king on there idk how many times i watched that shit when i was little but SO SO MANY

25. fav season and why?

I CANT CHOOOSEEEE DONT MAKE ME CHOOOSEEEE … i hate dealing in definitives . i love the winter bc it’s a like . actually nice temp outside for once where i live . and you can do outdoor things without being restricted by ITS SO FUCKING HOT! i love the spring to see all the new animals and everything regrowing ….. the summer bc it’s break and the freedom of it all . storm season!!! destructive but . really cool…. autumn the weather starts to get nice and usually when i start seeing all my friends again …. lots of fun . love the seasons

38. fav song at the moment?

jenny by the mountain goats :)

TYSM FOR THE ASK GEIN

#sheps asks #lu

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britesparc · 5 months ago

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Weekend Top Ten #653

Top Ten Disneyland Paris Rides, circa 2024

I've just come back from holiday, and as usual my main thought is that once again the house wasn’t flooded, burned down, or robbed whilst we were away (ha, suck it, burglars!).

However, as I've settled back into the daily grind, my thoughts return to pleasant times abroad, and the fun of the holiday itself. Because – and this was semi-planned – there is some synchronicity with last week’s list, when I ranked my favourite rides/experiences from Walt Disney World and Universal Studios in Orlando, back when I visited them as a child literally thirty years ago. You see, we’ve had a fantastic week-and-a-bit in Paris, France (as they say Across the Pond), rounded off with a chaser of Disneyland Paris. And so, partly to keep the magical flame alive, and partly to reconnect/reinforce/rehash last week’s list, I'm going to rank my favourite things from the European wing of the Disney Empire.

My criteria are a bit different this time around. For one thing, I was travelling with kids of my own. This put a spin (no pun intended when dealing with theme park rides) on the sorts of attractions we prioritised; not just the fact that we didn’t go on any inverted coasters, but also because there was a strong desire to ride Dumbo or see Stitch. To be fair, I've never been too much of a thrill seeker, so eschewing the loop-de-loops wasn’t really too big a deal; although I would have quite liked to go on the Indiana Jones coaster, which sadly was the only ride in the park Daughter #2 was too short for. But I didn’t mind giving the Avengers ride or Hyperspace Mountain a swerve. All the same, I was – to a certain extent – seeing the park through their eyes; as much as I enjoyed basically everything about it, the only thing I really did that was just “for me” was wander around the (sadly a bit sparse) Avengers Campus, and geek out because there was a giant version of one of Ant-Man's size-changing discs poking out of the ground.

The relative sparseness of Avengers Campus has prompted me to give a very short review of Disneyland Paris as a whole. I can’t really compare it to the park in Florida; I was twelve and in awe when I went there, and had little real understanding of how much effort and expense it was to travel halfway across the world to ride a make believe DeLorean. But we went to France at a funny time: the park is being renovated, with the entire “Studio” section getting a whole revamp. No longer themed around the movies and the productions, it’ll be “Disney Adventure Park”, or something like that; the areas currently themed around Pixar movies and Marvel movies will remain, and will be complemented by a Frozen-themed zone and – eventually – one based on The Lion King. As such, in 2024, some parts are closed off, and there are big fences up whilst construction is ongoing. It wasn’t too intrusive, really – especially as we had to deal with the fact that the entire Champs Elysees was shut for the Paralympics Opening Ceremony on our two days in Paris – but it did make life a little awkward. More serious, I think, is the way that certain areas either feel a touch underdeveloped – Avengers Campus, for instance, which could do with another themed ride and maybe some cool Easter eggs or photo areas (Mjolnir, anyone?) - or have a theme that doesn’t quite work (Discoveryland was originally designed around Jules Verne-style steampunk sci-fi but now is more space-y, with a Star Wars zone and a Buzz Lightyear ride; it gives it a somewhat disjointed aesthetic, with the gears and rivets not quite matching with Star Wars’ iconography).

This sounds like I’m sticking the boot in, but really I think the overall theming and design of Disneyland is so strong that the areas that don’t 100% hit the mark really stand out. To be honest, I wasn’t sure what it would feel like going back as an adult; but the magic I remember from childhood genuinely did return. It’s not the rides, as such, it’s the whole vibe of the place; back then, and now, I just love wandering around exquisitely themed locations, travelling through artificial palaces and constructed villages, marvelling at the – for want of a better word – set design of the place. And everything they do to make it exciting for kids is just tremendous. I balked at the price and the length of the queues, but to be honest the cast members are doing a fantastic job of living up to the image and personality of the characters they inhabit. Donald Duck even threatened my wife. What more do you want?

Anyway, the long and the short of it is, I really loved Disneyland Paris and despite how stupidly expensive everything is, I’d love to go again. Certainly not till after the Frozen stuff is built, maybe not till after they finish the Lion King stuff either. But what about the rides? Well, here you go: my official ranking of the best rides and attractions and whatnot at what used to be known as EuroDisney.

And, yes, of course I bloody loved Paris as well. It was a fantastic holiday all round. I felt suffused with culture, I climbed the Eiffel Tower, I explored the Paris Catacombs, and then I met a six-foot duck and watched drones form the shape of Elliot from Pete’s Dragon. It was a good week.

Big Thunder Mountain: I said we’re not much of a roller coaster family – my kids had literally never ridden one – but Big Thunder is great. The whole styling of the piece – the environment, the queue, the lot – is gold; it sells the mining experience. It’s a good length, the ride itself, and sufficiently exciting, with loads of fast turns and ups and downs, some good bits in the dark, and some great views as it snakes in and out of its mountain. Plus, to the delight of some, it has no inversions. Perhaps it’s a “my first proper roller coaster”, but it’s so deliciously exhilarating that no one minds. A classic.

Ratatouille: The Adventure: probably the closest a ride at DLP comes to my memories of Back to the Future at Universal Studios, this brilliantly combines huge-screen immersive visuals with an exciting (but not too thrilling) track ride. In little rat cars, you scamper in and out of large environments, as the massive screens surround you and bring you into the story. Lots of immersive elements and excitement, it manages to be both fun and cute.

Star Tours: The Adventures Continue: I loved this back in the nineties, and it feels like it might have changed a bit but the core experience is still there. You still get the immersive queue, with animatronic droids (and Mon Calamari!), and the whole vibe of taking a commercial tour trip. Then the ride itself kicks in, an exciting (and now 3D) simulator experience, as you hop from one Star Wars environment to another. It doesn’t tie together quite as well as I remember, and it feels rather short, but it’s so quintessentially Star Wars, and so exciting, that you won’t really care.

Spider-Man W.E.B. Adventure: another one where it’s all sold brilliantly by the surroundings, as you enter a science campus and help Peter Parker with an experiment. There’s much to enjoy and much that’s amusing (it’s nice that Peter’s classmates all appear to be other teen superheroes). The ride itself is really just a series of huge videogame screens in 3D, but it’s so cool: you have to “thwip” your hands to fight little spider-bots, and it tallies up the scores of everyone in your car. It’s tremendous fun, and – like Star Tours – does an excellent job with immersion into its world.

Buzz Lightyear Laser Blast: similar to Spider-Man, maybe skewing a bit younger, but also – I'd argue – a bit harder to play. You go round a slow track, with physical guns attached to your car, and you have to shoot at Zurg and his evil robots. It’s like laser tag, basically, with a Buzz Lightyear twist. It might be a bit slow, and I’m really rubbish at things like this, but again it’s good fun – and, again, it records your scores so you can mercilessly mock/be mocked by your family.

Phantom Manor: ah, a classic! Not sure why it’s not called Haunted Mansion like it is in the States (I consistently referred to it as “Phantom Menace”) but it’s basically the ride I remember from thirty years ago. It’s really just a slow-burn track ride – a ghost train, essentially – but it uses all manner (manor?) of trickery, from some great projection to two-way glass, to sell the idea of corpses and ghosts and whatnot. It starts out quite spooky and then just gets onto Skeleton Dance weirdness fairly quickly, so I don’t think kids will be too traumatised. More’s the pity.

Dumbo the Flying Elephant: Daughter #2 has loved Dumbo – the character and both the movies – for years, so this was a must-see. And whilst it’s essentially just a cute merry-go-round, there’s a slightly more thrilling aspect in that the little Dumbo cars really can go quite high. Pleasingly, you’re in control – you make them go up and down – so if you want to get a really cool elephant’s-eye-view of the park, you crank that sucker up like you’ve got a magic feather.

Crush’s Coaster: I’m sure there are a lot of people visiting Disneyland Paris who’d be surprised at how low this features. Don’t get me wrong, it’s a very exciting ride. A more intense coaster than Big Thunder, this has you sitting in somewhat-spinny shells as you rocket through the ocean, with lots of banked curves and fast drops. But the shells didn’t rotate as often as I was expecting, so if you’re facing backwards, you’re like that for most of the ride – and as such don’t quite see as much of the nice Finding Nemo stylings. Also, it’s pretty short; it feels over before you know it. So whilst I had a lot of fun, considering how popular it is – it's got one of the longest queues in the park – I think if I’d waited ninety minutes to go on it I’d be disappointed. As it was, we got there first thing - “rope dropped it”, as they say – and didn’t have to wait long. So that’s my review: fun but short, like Danny DeVito.

It’s a Small World: I love this ride. I know it’s cheesy, I know it’s tame, I know it’s daft, I know that it’s potentially problematic in its stereotypical depiction of multiple cultures even though I also know its heart is in the right place. But all those things combine to make it so supremely enjoyable and adorable. And let’s face it, it’s iconic, right? We all know what they were taking the piss out of in Shrek.

Stitch Live!: everything I’ve listed so far has been a proper ride, but Disneyland is also great for experiences. These can be everything from a formal character meet-and-greet (and those are genuinely great), to walk-through dioramas or just fantastically designed and engineered scenery (there’s a dragon under the castle!). Or you can go see a show! We all love Stitch in our house, and this interactive animated show is a delight, although I would argue that it possibly skews a bit young. A cel-shaded CG Stitch talks to the audience from the screen, calling out people by name and picking on the parents. It’s funny, it’s cool (I can imagine, for a kid, having a cartoon character speak in real-time would blow their minds), and it’s very Stitch-y. However, as well as skewing a bit young (which I guess makes sense), it doesn’t really include the children very much, more focused on making fun of the grown-ups; maybe that’s a necessity (data protection? Fear of upsetting the nippers?). Also, worth reminding your kids that Stitch isn’t really there, only on a screen. But! Still good fun.

Blimey. Lot of good stuff I guess! Anyway, it was a fun holiday. I’d wholeheartedly recommend it, except for the fact that it’s bloody expensive. I don’t necessarily mean “it costs a lot of money”, even though it does; it’s just that, well, for the same amount of money you could probably have a week on a beach. And I’ll tell you something else for substantially less than the cost of a set meal at Walt’s: after spending two days with kids at Disneyland, you could do with a week on a beach.

#top ten #disney #disneyland #disneyland paris #holidays #vacation #theme park #rides #roller coasters

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jurakan · 6 months ago

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can I have a fun fact in youtube deep dive format?

I, uh... don't know how to do that, friendo, because this is a Wendy's a blog not a video hosting site, but! I will try to give you something interesting. Today You Learned about the tygers of colonial Carolina!

[Alright, full disclosure: this is half a conspiracy theory of mine. I went down this rabbit hole after reading Wild New World by Dan Flores.]

In 1709, John Lawson published a book titled 'A New Voyage to Carolina' which is a detailed description of the people, flora, and fauna he found while exploring the Carolinas (I think mostly South Carolina? They weren't divided then, I think).

One thing he notes that I found interesting?

Tygers.

???

[whatcha talking about Johnny, we ain't got tygers here]

Listen to this from page 31:

As we were on our Road this Morning, our Indian shot at a Tyger, that cross'd the Way, he being a great Distance from us. I believe he did him no Harm, because he sat on his Breech afterwards, and look'd upon us.

Uh, okay... um... then on 119 we get this, when he's describing the different animals you can find in the area:

Tygers are never met withal in the Settlement; but are more to the Westward, and are not numerous on this Side the Chain of Mountains. I once saw one, that was larger than a Panther, and seem'd to be a very bold Creature. The Indians that hunt in those Quarters, say, they are seldom met withal. It seems to differ from the Tyger of Asia and Africa.

Alright, what makes this odd (other than that we don't have wild tigers in the Carolinas, if you don't count tailgating Clemson fans) is that the automatic guess you'd make is that he's talking about mountain lions/pumas. They don't live here now, but they did back before colonization. Except he specifically lists what we'd think of as mountain lions as 'panthers', and makes it clear that this animal, this 'tyger' isn't that.

So what are our possibilities here?

ONE: He saw an actual tiger.

...very unlikely. You'd think we'd know about this sort of thing, wouldn't you? If there were tigers in the Americas? Nah, let's dismiss this.

TWO: He made it up.

Well, look, Lawson did actually found towns in the Carolinas, so he has a vested interest in making people go there to live. If he tells you they've got cool animals to see/hunt, like tigers, well, that would definitely attract some colonists, wouldn't it? And they'd expand westward, as he points out that they're supposedly more common on the other side of the mountains (the Appalachians, presumably), and he'd get credit for that.

THREE: He's talking about a different big cat.

He does also mention the 'tygers' of Africa, except Africa doesn't have tigers, either. Either he's confused about that, or for him, 'tyger' just means 'big, colorful wild cat'. I remember that in telling Anansi stories, one author has his characters claim that 'Tyger' back in the day just meant 'big cat', and he uses 'Tiger' as the name of 'Osebo' (which I've seen other authors depict as a leopard). And while North America doesn't have tigers, it does have another really big, roaring cat...

Yes, the US does indeed have jaguars in the Southwest, though they are very rare there, as opposed to further south (and this Border Wall business is not helping conservation efforts). Historically, before they were hunted out by settlers, they did live in Texas and as far north as Colorado, and as far east as Louisiana. Heck, until the 60's it was still legal to shoot them in Arizona. Was it possible that Lawson's 'tyger' was a jaguar? He does say his indigenous correspondents told him that they were usually found west of the mountains, and rarely that far east--and the jaguar's historical range was west of the Appalachian, though pretty far from the Carolinas. And I admit that I have trouble imagining a jaguar wandering the wilds of the Carolinas (though that would be dope).

I don't know. I have no way of knowing. But Dan Flores is pretty insistent that jaguars used to be all over the place, and so he seems to subscribe to the theory that Lawson's 'tyger' was a jaguar that wandered into the Carolinas.

Hm.

A strange zoological mystery, to be sure.

In case you were wondering what happened to John Lawson, by the by, he was captured by the native Tuscarora in 1711 while exploring and tortured to death, shortly before the beginning of the Tuscarora War.

So now you know. I hope this was the 'deep dive' you were looking for.

#Fun Fact Friday #North Carolina #South Carolina #Today You Learned #wildlife #jaguars #tigers

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a-hazbin-reader · 1 year ago

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So… I heard ye looks at ocs, eh? Well… COOL

Meet: Vixie (based off the female fox from fox and hound)

^Human version of her ^

^sinner her^

Vixie vanshier (van-shy-er) was born in September 22 1900 <little fact I give all my ocs the same birthday as me so I can remeber> her family owned a plot of land in Oregon containing forms of animals. Her father James vanshier, was the owner of this land. One day mountain lions killed off a huge majority of there livestock, so since his wife marry vanshire was bed ridden with illness he taught vix how to shoot. She was well with a shot gun being a small female and only 9 but they could not keep up with the mountain lions so her father’s last resort was to move to Louisiana and become a railroader.

Vixie soon attended school and was a smart kid, her acidemic score impressed a lot of people, but there is one thing she could not get right… sewing class. One day she sat on the playground trying to mend a pice of fabric together. Even though she was a good shot she could not for the life of her get her hands to straighten out. She looked up to see a boy snickering at her and this boy was Alastor, his mom taught him a trick for mending things. (I imagine he had too a lot because he seems like the kid to go outside and climb trees and shit.) they’ve been friends ever since!

In her early 20s she became a singer/songwriter for a pub, tips sucked and her boss payed her Jack shit so she quit. She worked hard, she wrote sonnets, poets, and even her own songs. That’s when she met mimzy. Mimzy offers her a deal of a lifetime to sing her songs and be on stage. Vixie said yes exited for her new life. Alastor and her are still together and when she tells him this he just rolls his eyes. Anyways after a couple more months together they got straight into marriage no dateing none of that… CRAZY RIGHT!

Nie time for the Angsty bit.

One day she came home to find Alastor coverd in blood knife in hand, she loved too much for her soul, she loved Alastor. So she kissed him on the cheek saying “all will be ok” and went to bed with her husband. Now you might be wondering “how and why is she in hell.” Well you see mimzy would not let her quit, 1 aka him was banned so any forms of good tips where gone and 2 mimzy essentially gone bankrupt so paying her was out of the question. Vixie did want to quit but mimzy manipulated her saying “I got you up on your feet.” Or “your the reason why we gone bad!” But ofc vixie loves to deep and stayed. Until she came home crying and exhausted. Alastor was furious so he said “we will take care of this.” The we is what freaked her. Anyways mimzy died to her hands and not his.

When Alastor died that’s when all hell broke lose, she did not want her husband, her poet, her LIFE be viewed as bad. So she continued to kill in her husbands name. She killed the wrong person. She killed a cult member who hunted and killed widowed woman. Naturally she was kidnapped and dragged out of her home only to be caged and smelt by hounds. She once thought they spared her until a horn blew. Dogs smelled her scent as men on horses and shot gun fallowed and chased her. She got caught in a snare and could not get out for her adrenaline was rushing, so she could not think. That’s when she met the eyes of a man, that man was the son of whom she killed. She looked at the sky to only be then shot in the throat.

Ending up in hell she instantly gained popularity with her music. Essentially became a music overloard. She had more influence than Alastor and vox just due to how diverse music was. Oh and don’t use anything of her without her permission or consequences. anyways it took over half a decade to realize the radio demon is her Alastor. And when the Vs came along that’s when her power/infuence really grew. She kept up with modern times so she could keep being this overloard and respected her husbands wishes at the same time.

Anyways that all I got atm hun, I changed her a lot since the pilot and still need to write her story.

Omg she's so spunky and twisted! They're a fucked up couple who stand by each other 😤 I love her sinner form so much?? Just GORGEOUS

#look at her #I SAID LOOK AT HER #she's beautiful #but so fucked up #yet so loving??#her and Nix would probably #not get along #and I live for it #Vix is my bbygurl now #can't have her back #nope #we love a loyal wife #I love that her name is #so close to my own oc's #and that they died in a #sort of similar way

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1moreoffkeyanthem · 1 year ago

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I saw a video the other day of women’s husband who stopped to go check out some bison and the video starts with him running back over the hill yelling to start the car because he saw one get up and she’s just laughing at him. I thought it was so Stan coded especially the way you write him!

Oh my GODDDDDDDD YOURE RIGHT!!!

Like the way my Stans have gotten WAY too close to an animal that could definitely fuck him up, every time, bc there isn’t a single Creature out there that he doesn’t wanna make friends with. This man will see a MOUNTAIN LION and be like :) kiittyyyy. He is looking at wolves and unironically thinking “can I get that dog” smh sir WHERE is your sense of self preservation

The answer: it flies out the WINDOW when he sees any animal ever. I literally wrote a TSOT oneshot where he tried to make friends with bear cubs and the mama bear clawed the fuck out of him and he was just like “I’m sorry I made you nervous I just wanted to say hi” fully just not even blaming her at all as he’s actively bleeding out lmfao.

And if an animal fucked him up? He’s not even CONSIDERING that they’re in the wrong like OJV Stan once got his fucking ribs broken getting kicked by a horse and he fully maintains that it’s his fault for trying to give it medicine. And was he worried about the fact that he was LITERALLY unable to breathe? NOPE he was just sorry he scared the horse this man I swear

I’m just imagining Stan getting way too close to that bison and Kyle’s over by the car like “oh my God Stan back up back up” and Stan is just “these things are so fuckin cool” and then one gets up and like they’re HUGE and then it GLARES AND HUFFS AT HIM and he totally bolts bc this man has watched an ungodly amount of Animal Planet and he knows what that means so he’s HAULING ASS like “KYLE START THE CAR START THE CAR” and once they’re safely away kyle just goes “well what did you think was gonna happen”

I may need to write that now. That’s iconic.

And it’s SO kickass that u thought of my Stans when you saw that video thank you for letting me know, like I deadass CACKLED at 4am

#asks #THIS GENUINELY MADE ME SO HAPPY #south park #lmm voice: look at my son #smh he WOULD #but also same #I see a creature I’m trying to approach it #literally earlier today I was trying to get close to a squirrel bc it looked really soft ok #and my partner was just like that things gonna scratch you #like? so?#Stan moment #stan marsh

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inventors-fair · 2 years ago

Text

Basic Type Commentary: Discoveries

As I learned, and by that I mean as I sorta figured out without actual consequence, the flavor/mechanics love is hard to balance. Cards like Loam Lion are suave and cool and mysterious to me; you got that mechanical bend but also, like, the lion gets to hide in the woods! That’s really cool! And...there’s also the mechanical ones straight-up, which encourage deckbuilding restrictions, but those are a different kind of fun, and... I think I should’ve asked for more of the former but I’m glad that I got all these good designs regardless.

Like, this week was GOOD. Very few mechanical stumbles. It does kinda suck when you have some cards that are functional but not exciting but still REALLY good, because talking about them is different than evaluating them. Y’know? They can’t be evaluated in the same way because they’re already really awesome, so they end up just being good on their own and that’s about it. Still, the nature of this contest allowed for that open-endedness; what else could I have expected? I’m still quite happy to be talking about the cards I enjoyed and tweaking the things that need tweaking. It’s all fun.

JUDGE PICKS are cards I want to commend for one reason or another, that either had a specific cool aspect or just missed the cutoff.

@0woah — Contracted Excavator

Interesting name and concept you’re working with here. I would definitely caution to make this rare, because, I mean, Ragavan’s a strong little monkey as is (and, like, this isn't even comparable, just so we're clear), and even at this cost the ability to run a mono-red deck with all Mountains and this is incredibly strong. Still, I gotta say: this is a real solid submission. I’m viewing it through a rare lens all the same. The ability to exile-steal your opponents’ best cards or at least prevent them from getting their shenanigans is pretty crazy.

I think I see the flavor, too, but this is one of those utilitarian cards; I’m doing commentary out of order so I think I said something similar below. Regardless! On the flavor front, sure, dwarf mercenaries checks out. Good use of the type with the mechanical synergy. The dwarf mines, and whatever they find is yours. Awesome. In limited, this could be a really strong utility card if not a half-decent attacker, and once you up the rarity we’re pretty good. Notes: It should be “Mountain card” for the activation, and I would word it: “Choose target opponent. Exile the top card of that player’s library and the top card of your library. You may cast those cards this turn, and you may spend mana as though it were mana of any color to cast those spells.” You don’t need “in hand” for this.

@batatafilosofal — Flood Away (JUDGE PICK)

In a mono-blue deck, this thing’s a heck of a slog to get through. I’m a huge fan of big swingy bounce-like cards, but wow... All the same, though, this has a unique way of getting around that by having the big things come in first. It’s a shame that your opponents’ permanents will enter the battlefield before yours—unless they’re all small and your stuff is pretty big. Which, well, speaks for itself. What a strange card. I think I want to veer away from flavor-specific critique here because it’s clearly a general-magic utilitarian card, and that’s totally fine. The art could speak for all of that.

The question is then, with the math and whatnot, if this is a little too headachey for standard, or even for limited, and I love this card but I gotta say, a zillion counters and upkeep triggers and a return to suspend in standard? Not sure how I feel about that optimistically. What I will say, however, is that this card’s definitely great in digital. On Arena, you cast this card, and beep boop everything’s out of the picture. I have a vehement disdain for Arena, but I have a soft spot for places where human error would make things worse. Perhaps this card has a home. Also, you can remove that second “each” from the first ability, I believe.

@bread-into-toast— Peak Performance

I’m curious why this wasn’t an “until end of turn” or “until the end of your next turn” here; Occam’s razor, that was an oversight, but regardless. Quite a strange little thing here. I think the wording that you were going for and the ultimate execution may have, well, needed more words, like those weird milling-recursion cards they’ve been making lately. I think I see what you were going for generally: double-impulse type of common, with an extra land grab. Fine enough! Not egg-in-an-avocado good, but fine enough.

I’ll admit that the flavor text is making me grin. This isn’t a flavor-based contest, so people are probably going for a little more of a natural what-follows kind of vibe, which is totally cool! Silly for the advantage. You know, it’s a shame that this card only gets Mountains. It’s basically unplayable or at least really frustrating in a two-color draft archetype. Perhaps this is suggesting more of a constructed lean or a monocolor format, Pauper-burny, and I feel that. The limited player in me is seeing this as a fifteenth pick almost all of the time. I ain’t about to complain when I get advantage’d out by the 16-mountain burner, y’know?

@deg99 — Llanowar Purist

Is there precedent for two replacement effects like this? I mean, I grok it, but wow. This card can be absolutely bonkers. In a casual mono-green Elf deck, having each basic Forest put a COUNTER on each Elf you control?? Good lord. I wonder if this card would be better served as a core-set or DMU-type staple, because in a type-matters environment where Elves are one of the draftable archetypes, this is pretty strong. Hm, all the same, you have to build around it kinda hard. But in constructed? I dunno, I feel that you can make a strong Elf deck even stronger to the point of it being almost out of control. But maybe not. I think I’m worrying too much about blowouts from my days of Felidar Retreat. And this is kind of a more limited Felidar Retreat.

I’m overthinking it. Powerful? Yes. A staple? Eh. Good in limited? If you can make it work, I suppose. Elves and the rest of ‘em make for hard archetypes but the environment can change that. By itself, this card’s speaking to a more constructed means, I think, but could work for limited. Nothing wrong with cards like that overall. It’s not immediately evident but it’s not asking to be so. Getting even one other Elf out would make things work pretty well, so I’m going to say that, just like DMU, this would be totally fine. Oh, right, and as a grammar check: A basic foRest is a land. A basic foRRest....you know what, there was a joke here, but I'm electing to omit it. Point is, one R.

@halfsilveredmirror — Vantress Waterwheels (JUDGE PICK)

Good news! There’s only one card I could immediately see with which this goes two-card infinite. You, my friend, are tempting fate. What on earth! This is a beast of a card to get down for making blockers and tappers and mana dorks even better. What else?... You know what, it doesn’t have to do anything else. Clock of Omens was broken, and this card is less so, which is genuinely awesome. It’s asking for infinite combos, of course, but that’s the way the cookie crumbles, and there’s no specific archetype around which to build, AND it takes up mana resources, so that’s great.

Maybe this card’s even bad! Hold on. I mean, like, if you’re in limited, and you try to make this card work, and it’s the one you draw when you’re dead on board, it’s gonna feel REALLY bad to draw it. Like, astoundingly bad feeling. I love that. It’s a card that asks a lot of the player to make it work. Simple, powerful, great for looting dorks. I will say that the flavor text is pretty weak here. Waterwheels making kinetic energy isn’t exactly surprising, so the “reveal” you’re going for doesn’t land for me. I dunno, just not feeling the payoff.

@izzet-always-r-versus-u — Scuttle

You know, I’m not sure why this one didn’t wow me. I think the simplicity is fine, and the card plays harder the more Islands you have, which is fine, even though it’s almost always going to be a strictly better Mana Leak in the late game—but, it is an uncommon after all. Limited is gonna be fine with it, as it can vary depending on the environment and there’s nothing wrong with Force Spikes. Maybe that’s it: the most I can say for it is that “there’s nothing wrong with it.” And we do need cards like that, cards that could even be great in scenarios where now we have Mana Leak-but-better in Pioneer and whatnot.

The flavor is a little off. Sirens dashing hopes and dashing ships is a violent act of enforced luring, and perhaps this is the place where the ships (spells) are destroyed, but the flavor text’s description feels...like there should be another party? I don’t know, I think that it’s probably fine—with a different name. Scuttling is the act of making holes to sink the ship, cutting away, sometimes deliberately to your own vessel. It’s a subtle/non-telegraphed act of espionage by two equal parties, which doesn’t come across here for me. Now, I was thinking about crabs, and the flavor text of a possible reprint where crabs eat their way through the bottom of a boat, making a hole to sink it—and that’s the slightly less violent version than the “dashing” here. Verb choice matters.

@just--a--penguin — Garden of the Eidolon

How exactly does the dragon come into play here? Perhaps in the art direction, but who knows. Greek mythology is full of possibilities. First things first: I like the flavor format. Also, how does a land get inspired? Could’ve used a little more substance. I assume the eidolons are the ones tending the gardens. Do the gods need to eat? At least on Theros, I thought they were supplemented by the belief of their people. No matter. Tirezius still has fruit, so maybe I’m talking nonsense. At the end of the day, this card is fine, but I wouldn’t pick it highly in any format. Also, how does a land get inspired?

I guess third things third, this card should be uncommon? It’s a pretty great ramp spell and fixer, but that’s been done at common before. The mana not emptying feels like it’s upping the complexity; maybe this could be a three-mana uncommon? Either way, it’s not a bad card, but it’s lacking a little bit for me. Going back to it, I think the flavor text could’ve used a little more oomph.

EDIT: Something strange happened to the copy-pasting of the commentary here, so I have no idea what else to say beyond this. I think in the end I went with a rant about rarity, mana emptying, questioning myself and how mana works, and then I asked Maro something, and then I made popcorn and drove to catsit. Bottom line as well was that this card is nigh unplayable even in limited at this cost and rarity. Needs other substance and focus.

@misterstingyjack — Stonybrook Tideweaver (JUDGE PICK)

Oh, well that’s weird—but I guess either great minds think alike or great workshops produce cool results. The merfolk Island-love has always been there but I haven’t thought about it much until now! I really like the mechanics of this card. It’s asking a little bit of the board, but it’s an effect that, given the state of the board, I can imagine people trying to make work, and having it work well. Tap a merfolk, then get your High Tide. Wording-wise, I believe “until end of turn” needs to go before all that because most MTG cards like to end on a clean .” at the end of their rules text when applicable.

I don’t think playability would be affected in either limited or constructed. This is a card for Merfolk players to have fun with and to boost their archetypical decks. I like the specificity of it. The flavor text feels good conceptually but reads oddly to me. The second part being its own sentence makes me... Oh, no, nono, dangit, now I REALLY want this to be a rhyming couplet somehow. Look, I’m not going to figure that out, but I’m tasking you with it now. This is your burden to bear. The tl;dr of it is that having that sentence makes it feel stilted after a period and, like the river, it could use smoother flow.

@nine-effing-hells — Ire of Stones

You might want to double-check and hand-enter your reminder text, because “another Mountain” is cute flavorfully but doesn’t need the ‘nother’ up in there. Still, I feel this card and I feel what you’re going for. This one is weird and I really like that drawback for it. For this contest, I feel that this is exactly the kind of card that I was hoping to see at the concept level: it interacts with the card type in a manner that shows a flavorful caress. Did I ask for that specifically? No, but what’re we gonna do at this point, right?

The title “ire” is a little off, but as for the rest of it... What can I say? This card’s cute. It could be fun to get your Goblin Guides in early and then, when they die, you get some untapped lands. I doubt you can go infinite easily with these things, so that’s all fun and fair. Instead, you have a beater, and that’s all we can ask for. Hm, I wonder how this contest would have gone with monocolor cards that care about different land types... In retrospect, that might have even been better, but you know what, I’ll give it another year, assuming I have the time and energy for this, heh. It’s a beater, it’s sensible, it’s fast, it’s not too powerful, I like it. Fair’s fair.

@real-aspen-hours — Slip Under

So yeah, let’s assume a rare here, heh. Mechanically, I think that there’s nothing wrong with either part of this card. The wording on the first ability could be “Creatures you control have ward (2)” for ease of access, so let’s assume that. This card is a limited stranger, an odd duck, because it kind of forces these two colors, but if that’s what works, that’s what works. I would have liked more of a flavorful connection between them, because it’s fine as it stands and I appreciate the multicolor bend, but I want that little glue there.

The real glue that’s missing is what the name represents in terms of an aura. Intangible concepts aren’t easy, and perhaps with cards like Find the Path and Annex I have less ground to stand on, but verbs as aura names rub me the wrong way—or at least I feel that it doesn’t fit as well. Maybe the creatures are slipping under? But then, why would one slipping-under action result in the ward, and then another be phasing out? I would rather have a specific flavor name that referred to the protection granted by the act of enchanting this land that made the sacrifice effect more sensible. Oh, yeah, before I forget: card’s still pretty great! Fun to abuse all your little creatures for a boardwipe.

@reaperfromtheabyss — Seeker of the Thousand Ways

Gah, long names that look awkward, my old nemesis! ... Gah, cool mechanics involved in combat, my other nemesis! Ahem. Anyway, this card’s hella cool. I think that it speaks for itself, and I think that “You may play that card this turn” would be a better way to word it and has appeared before, but that’s a small quibble. Should the exile be a may ability? Eh, no, maybe not. I also really like the idea of scrying both cards to the bottom and then flipping an even more unplayable card off of the top. That would happen to me for sure.

It’s also quite an archetype you’re asking for. Three-color possibilities actually feels...kinda cool? It makes me wonder if they’d reprint the DMU duals—and how many times have I mentioned those now? I don’t even want to count—for those kinds of specific shenanigans. Maybe just a couple, maybe just enemy pairs. Either way, no, yeah, it’s a totally fine card. The name really does leave a bit to be desired, though. Seeker of the Way was certainly a card, and this callback feels almost...funny, or at least an attempt at a joke rather than an uplifting remembrance to me. Still, could just be me.

@spooky-bard — Tarpit Ceratops

Like a fossilized dinosaur skeleton, this card feels cool but a little too sticky. The explore archetype in limited was a strange one to say the least, and in constructed—well, wasn’t there some crazy-ass lifegain deck going around? Am I the only one who remembers that? I might be going crazy. Anyway, this card groks, but the pieces that want to go together don’t quite have that backing for me yet. Referencing cards revealed through another card’s exploration means that this card is kinda dead a lot of the time, no pun intended, and a four-mana 3/3 menace is super cool but not awesome. The archetype could work well by putting THIS into the graveyard, and that’s all cool.

I dunno, I’m just not sold yet. I do grok it, I promise, and I know that it should adhere. There’s nothing specific that I can point to that makes me hesitate. If anything, I’d say that it’s the ambition of it. There is indeed a fair amount of ambition taking place with the question of what gets revealed, and you know what, I want to commend you for trying something new on that front. Small actual note, the “it” on the Swamp clause there? It reads like it’s referring to the Swamp and that’s pretty confusing. And shouldn’t it be “is” revealed?

@stupidstupidratcreatures — Kor Ambusher

This is certainly a Kor. You know what, I’m actually a little surprised that there wasn’t a card named this already, and I could have sworn that there was. Ah well, learn something new every day. So! Mechanically, yep, that’s a warrior, it’s suggesting an RW warriors archetype, it’s a cool white card, and it gets to break a little chunk of a the pie without actually breaking anything. That much is all fine.

For contest terms, this card’s pretty insubstantial? The lack of art direction and flavor text mean that the ‘generally good’ mechanics are all we have from it. This card feels like something in the slot of a set skeleton. And you know what, if you’re building a set, there’s nothing wrong with that, and it’s understandable why this card would exist. It just means that there’s not much to say about it beyond the fact that it’s...good. Perhaps the nature of the contest meant that that was more of the mechanical bend, but all the same. Afraid I don’t have much more to say, cap’n.

@wolkemesser — The Soilsmith

The reasons why Yedora specifies “nontoken” are numerous, but in general, the face-down restriction is the more important one. The Soilsmith retaining name, mana value, and abilities means that going infinite and abusing sac outlets to basically get unkillable lands with static abilities is...rough. It’s rough! I think it’s inadvertent, but you made a magnificently busted card here. In Limited, this is the card you have to build around and win the game with, and in constructed—I’m thinking Commander—you aren’t going to make any friends here. Besides, it counts ITSELF. Which is disgustingly strong.

I know that Obsidian Fireheart is cool, but that reminder text wouldn’t be as useful as just saying that it remains after The Soilsmith isn’t on the battlefield or whatever. “Rotting” implies decay, and this is permanent. There are...quite a few quibbles with this card, and I do still want to say that it’s a cool idea, but wow, no, it’s mechanically broken. Win some, lose some.

One of these cards, IMO, fits next week’s prompt perfectly. Which one?

-@abelzumi

#mtg #magic the gathering #custom magic card #commentary #general commentary #basic type contest #inventor's fair

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