#it was SO bad

[pangur-and-grim]

I'm so bad at being a human........so my my kid's book got nominated for a Canadian reading award last year, and before we went onstage we had to do short recorded interviews for tv (?? maybe??). before I did mine, I said "if this ends up sucking do you have to use the footage?" and they reassured me that they'd dump it. and then they asked me what the value of literacy was to Canadian children, and my recorded answer was "oh my god. oh my god. the value of literacy......I don't know. what the hell. the value of literacy....."

[enitsirk]

straight up

[xbomboi]

now THIS stuff is much more recent

i still have some older stuff i wanna post, but for now, i wanna share my most recent assortment of eah doodles.

[zaphodbeeblebroxssecondhead]

The prop team for 'What Are Little Girls Made Of':

[annt-i]

Last night after a birthday celebration I got pulled over (traumatizing), so you know I had to put Alex in this situation to cope

[eternallyunrested]

Here's a doodle of Cass for a meme I'm making. I couldn't resist posting her early, drawing her was like a breath of fresh air. Hope I somewhat captured the @team-avia art style 😭

[babyhatesreality]

what if someone else tries to discipline stucky's babygirl?🥹🥹 like, some random dude who considers himself a daddy got mad for something she did?? i think daddy stucky would absoluty go ✨bersek✨

Oh....*Berserk* is putting it mildly....

But let's back up a bit first. You've been with Steve and Bucky long enough that you're truly and deeply one of the family. And with that, it means that you and your friends have gotten into plenty of trouble before at each other's places. You've been put in time outs by several of your extended family members- mostly Tony, Pepper, Natasha, and Bruce. There's a rule in the tower that if you're little and misbehaving while in their care, anyone in the family is allowed to give a time out. Of course it means you're in big trouble when your primary caregivers find out, so you don't ever MEAN to get into mischief. It just ...sometimes ...happens! Right?? :D

But there was this one time that SHIELD was introducing a group of new operatives. They were the ones who would be running some of the simpler operations that didn't require super strength, stealth, or swag. But they would have access to and contact with the Avengers, and so were brought into the Tower for training.

There was this one new recruit named Kenneth. He was tall, had a firm jaw, strong enough to handle pretty much anything- and had an extremely overblown sense of his own worth. He had decided (without asking anyone or confirming anything) that he was on his way to becoming the first civilian Avenger simply because...he was that awesome. Which he was not, but that comes later.

Since this new operatives team would also be responsible for looking out for low level threats to the Avengers themselves, they were briefed on all the Littles and Caregivers in the tower. So if, God forbid, something happened, they knew the chain of command to help take care of the Littles in a crisis situation- mostly getting the Littles to the correct Avenger.

Welp, as with most other things, Kenneth didn't feel these rules applied to him either. He knew that if he were ever to encounter one of you "littles" (as he put it, complete with his own stupid air quotes and a dumb look on his face), he'd make sure that he'd show his authority, and that would prove he could be an Avenger. *Sidenote-it's funny how these dude-bros' egos work, isn't it?*

One day Daddy and Papa had brought you upstairs with them, as had the rest of the caregivers with their own littles. It was an easy half day, and barring anything suddenly popping up, there was just regular paperwork and classified debriefings to meet about- a safe day for you all to be up there. The other littles were playing a game of tag in the big rec room, but you were feeling a little cranky from a rough night and just wanted to be on your daddies' laps. You would hop down off Bucky's lap ten minutes into a meeting to climb onto Steve's, and then back again ten minutes later. Hey, you were happy, they were happy, it was all good.

You politely asked if you could go get a drink of water, and after insisting that you could be a big girl by yourself, Bucky let you go down the hall to the kitchen area. And that's where you ran into Kenneth, who was sneaking up to the meeting, trying to make up some excuse as to why he needed to be in this Avengers-only debriefing (he was pretty sure they weren't even going to question his right to be there, but it was always good to have a plan B, right?).

He immediately identified you, and stopped you in the hallway by grabbing you by the shoulder (wrong move #1). "And where do you think you're going, little girl?" he asked you snidely (wrong move #2). You immediately stepped back, trying to get yourself out of his grip. You didn't know this guy, and you weren't supposed to talk to strangers. And no one was allowed to touch you without your permission. Daddy and Papa taught you well.

But Kenneth took that as defiance before you even opened your mouth, tightening his grip on your arm (wrong move #3...you get the idea). "You are not supposed to be wandering the halls by yourself, are you?" he sneered. "Some caregivers, just letting a helpless little girl wander around unguarded." He leaned into your face. "Someone could get hurt."

That scared you, as it sounded very threatening, so you shook your arm again, trying to pull away. "Please let go," you said through gritted teeth, trying to be polite (he was in the Tower after all, and no one got in without SHIELD's permission), but really wanting to kick this guy in his private area. Instead, Kenneth yanked your arm so hard that you cried out, and started dragging you towards the meeting room. He shoved you down onto your bottom right outside the doorway, then pointed a finger at you.

"You stay right there, little missy, and don't even think about moving. You've been very bad and you're in big trouble," he scolded, unwarranted. You just glared at him but didn't move. He didn't even bother knocking on the door to the meeting room- he just barged in.

"Captain Rogers, Sergeant Barnes? I've got something that you both need to see, immediately," he said arrogantly.

You heard the shuffle and scramble of your daddies moving quickly, and you knew they were panicking about you. But the second they got out of the doorway and saw you cowering on the floor with a glower on your face, they both stopped, confused.

"Baby, are you okay?" Bucky asked frantically, dropping to his knees and reaching out to you. You threw yourself into his arms, relieved.

"What happened? Why was she sitting on the floor?" Steve asked as he got down next to you and Bucky, brushing your hair away from your face and scanning you as hard as he could, looking for injuries.

"She was wandering around the halls, unsupervised," Kenneth replied lightly, the arrogance dripping off of him. "Then she was defiant and disobedient when I tried to help her."

" 'Tried to help her'?" Steve repeated, slowly standing up to face Kenneth. Anyone with half a brain could hear the steel in his voice and see the rage in his posture. Even Kenneth turned a bit pale at the fury he'd unknowingly invoked. "What...exactly...did she need help with?"

"Well, er...um..she wasn't supposed to be in the hallways-"

"She had permission to be there," Steve interrupted him. The aura of controlled anger about to snap that was radiating off your Papa was something to behold- you'd never seen him like this before and it was AWESOME. "She was getting a drink from the kitchen." He turned to you, smiling softly, but his vibranium-infused posture didn't change one bit. "Lovebug, were you able to get your drink?"

"No, Papa," you said simply.

"I see," he said, turning back to Kenneth as his gaze turned back to razor blades. "So you kept my baby from getting a drink when she's thirsty, you stopped her without permission and tried to get her to disobey OUR directives, and you barged into a classified meeting." He pinned the now completely pale Kenneth to the wall with only his clear cut steel blue gaze. "Anything else, baby girl?" he asked you without turning his head.

"He touched me," you added, then turned your gaze to Bucky, who was still holding you. "And it hurt my arm."

Bucky set you down gently, then stood up and faced Kenneth.

Kenneth was only able to remember three things from that moment until he woke up in the hospital. The first being the insanely loud thundering of crumbling concrete mixed with a strange whooshing sound that he couldn't immediately identify. There was also a cracking and a crunching that seemed to be coming from inside of him, but that didn't make any sense either...

The second thing was the fact that he was no longer in the hallway- he seemed to have somehow transported to another area that he was pretty sure was about three rooms away from where he'd just been standing.

The third thing was the sudden and overwhelming pain screaming all over his body. He had just enough time to realize that the Winter Soldier had thrown him through 3 solid walls before he blacked out.

When he woke up in the hospital, among the machines and IVs, he found a small cardboard box with all his desk items in it.

[skwistokwarrior]

as much as i love the idea of wash cooking for blue team, i love the idea that he can't cook for shit. like. to an absurd level. caboose is let into the kitchen before he is

[ughjay]

dad!battinson just gives off the vibes of a dad who’s been wearing the same ratty pair of boxers for 20+years, but like around the house, nothing but those boxers and an equally as disgusting old tshirt

everyones begging him to throw them out, they look like a wayward glance could disintegrate the last few threads theyre hanging onto and they leave nothing to the imagination

[septembersung]

Please pray for my 1yo, it’s the third day of her having a bad tummy bug and every time I think she’s getting better she relapses. Also, that the rest of us don’t get sick. We just went through this not too long ago and it was so miserable.

[agentoffangirling]

If you think Tumblr's reading comprehension is poor, you have not ever encountered Quotev users in your life

[mynameisjag]

It all starts innocently enough.

“Mr. Logan, smile!”

Kitty had her new phone in selfie mode, posing with Logan just over her shoulder in the background, the man just glanced over her way with an eyebrow raised in question.

“Hmm?”

“Just one, please!”

He just huffed.

“Please! It’ll be the first picture I post with this new phone!”

She got her picture, her smiling holding up a peace sign while Logan peered over her shoulder, head tilted in slight confusion.

Completely normal…even if there were more likes then usual…

Next time was a short video, “And this is our history teacher, Mr. Logan.”

“What are you doing?”

“I was asked to take some publicity videos to post about how welcoming our school is, say something to the camera!”

He snorted and waved her off, “Busy.”

“Please?”

“…fine…”

It was a popular video, couple seconds spent with the teachers and their stories about their classes.

The repeated replies of ‘meow, meow” at a timestamp where it was Logan went mostly unnoticed…

“How do we explain to the man that is basically a father figure to us that there are thirst traps of him now?”, the group of teens groaned in unison as Bobby scrolled through his phone, face scrunching up, “they keep calling him ‘little meow meow’, that is a grown man.”

“If I have to see one more edit of that stupid ‘Nasty Dog’ song to Logan,” Rogue threw up her hands in frustration, “I’ll take me and him out to save us both the pain of this!”

“Has…has anyone…told or…showed…him any of this? I mean, I’m not even sure he remembers he has a phone on him, much less use it for socials,” Kitty frowned down at her phone, “Who keeps supplying the photos and everything? Where are they getting these from?”

-

I think the teens would suffer so much in a more modern era, they are just trying to have fun please stop asking if their parental figures are single or open to suggestions.

[shiggcel]

the ao3 writers curse is so real. i drafted a lil shiggy x reader and 45 mins later i had an allergic reaction and spent 5 hours in the er

[nsfwitchy2]

Sometimes mother daughter bonding is your mom telling you about how bad this book she’s reading is and then you see her skipping pages and ask why and she goes, “oh it’s a sex scene, they’re bad” so you insist she gives you the book so you can read the sex scene in her place and make fun of it

It was bad

[apollos-boyfriend]

tears in my eyes my professor was talking about his experience with coming out “late” (he was in his 30s) and was desperately trying to find the word for what bigots called him, and it went on for a solid 2 minutes because we ALL thought he meant faggot and no one wanted to be the one to yell that out in a quiet classroom, especially considering it would’ve been wrong. he was searching for abomination