#it takes a while to understand their dynamic but they are best buddies in my mind

[theloveinc]

i know shinso and monoma's text exchanges are incredible

[cumonstevie]

"Hello? Who Is This?"

Summary: Steve and your little brother bond via play phone.

Pairing: Steve Harrington x Reader

Warnings: nothing but fluff

A/N: I haven't proof-read this yet, so I'll do that when I wake up. I was just excited to FINALLY post something after like, 2 years. I hope you guys like it!

“I hate this,” Steve says as he closes his math book. “I don’t even like math.”

You playfully roll your eyes at your boyfriend before turning them back to your own math book. “Nobody likes math,” you say, “but it’s mandatory so…”

Steve groans and throws himself on your couch, burying his face in the soft cushion. “Can’t we take a little break?”

His words are muffled but you can understand what he’s saying.

“Steve…”

“Pleaseee,” he sits upright and gives you puppy eyes, “We’ve been going at this since school let out.”

You didn’t get the chance to respond when the front door opened and in came your mom with your two year old brother on her hip. Though, if you could respond, you would have said yes to the break.

“Steeb!” your baby brother yelled out as his eyes set on your boyfriend beside you.

He wiggled around in your mom's arms until she set him down and he came running into the living room, completely disregarding you and going over to Steve.

“Hey buddy!” Steve exclaimed happily, lifting him up and giving him a big hug.

Your mom chuckled at your brother’s excitement for the older male as she set down the groceries that were still in her hand. “Hi Steve.”

Steve looks over at your mom and smiles. “Hello Mrs. Y/L/N!”

“I hope you guys had enough time to yourselves because I don’t think Kyle is going to leave you alone.” she chuckles as she watches your brother cuddle up to Steve.

“Y/N’s gonna have to deal with it, I gotta spend time with my best friend now that he’s home, right Ky?” He looks down at your brother and he nods.

“Right!”

You playfully roll your eyes and make your way to the kitchen to help your mother put the groceries away while Steve and Kyle busied themselves playing with the building blocks that were nearby.

About an hour later, your mother took your brother upstairs for a nap so you and Steve could continue to study but this time it was a different subject. However, thirty minutes into Steve quizzing you with flashcards, Kyle comes running down the hall with his play phone in hand and your mom following behind him.

“He only slept for a little bit.” she tells you. “Guess I’ll get started on dinner.”

Your mom disappears into the kitchen and you turn back to Steve.

“Ready for another one?” he asks and you give him a firm nod. “Okay, how does dynamics differ from kinematics?”

You open your mouth to answer but before you could, your brother appears in front of the two of you. Kyle grunts and extends his arm toward Steve, offering him the play phone and Steve doesn’t miss a beat.

“Sorry, I have to take this,” your boyfriend apologizes to you as he takes the play phone from the tiny human in front of him, pressing it up to his ear. “Hello? Who is this?”

Steve stands up and starts pacing the living room with one hand on his hip while your brother stares up at him.

“No I’m sorry I can’t be your best friend, I already have one and he’s standing right next to me.” Steve pauses like someone else is talking on the phone then with a shake of his head, he sinks down to his knees in front of Kyle and passes him the play phone. “Here, talk some sense into him because he’s clearly not understanding what I’m saying.”

Kyle puts the phone to his ear and looks at Steve. “What do I say?”

“Tell him I can’t be his best friend because I’m already your best friend.” he whispers to the two year old.

“Otay.” Kyle whispers before turning his attention to the play phone. “He not your best friend, he mine!” your brother shouts then smiles at Steve. “That good?”

Steve gives your brother a thumbs up. “That’s great buddy.”

Suddenly, Kyle gasps and quickly hands the play phone over to Steve. “He said he want to talk to Steeb!”

He nods and takes the phone with a stern look on his face. “Listen mister, I don’t want to be best friends with you because Kyle is already my best friend, okay? Tell him.”

Steve brings the play phone to your brother where he shouts a “yeah!”

“So don’t call me again, alright? Bye.” He pretends to hang up the phone before handing it back to Kyle. “If he calls back, let me know, okay?”

“Otay!” your brother nods before running off to the kitchen, probably to have your mother speak into the play phone as well.

“Sorry,” Steve says as he grabs the flashcards again. “Some weirdo called wanting to replace Kyle as my best friend. Can you believe that?”

You look at your boyfriend in amusement as you shake your head. “How dare they.”

“Right?” he agrees before shuffling the cards three times.

You giggle at your boyfriend who, only mere seconds ago, was taking role playing on a play phone seriously with your two year old brother. This catches his attention and he looks over at you.

“What?”

“Nothing,” you say, “you’re just really good with kids is all.”

Steve shrugged. “I was lonely as a kid. Playing with Kyle is like playing with the sibling I never had.”

You smile and run your fingers through Steve’s hair. “You’ll make a great dad, Stevie.”

“Yeah?” The apples of his cheeks tint pink, “you think so?”

“I know so.”

The two of you look at each other fondly and Steve reaches over to grab your hand, rubbing small circles over it with his thumb.

However, the moment is interrupted by your mother hollering from the kitchen; “As much as I love you, hopefully we won’t find that out any time soon, right Steven?”

He pulls his hand away from yours and sits up straight, clearing his throat. “Right Mrs. Y/L/N! No kids until I graduate and get a well paying job!”

“Good!” your mother calls out, “I’m not trying to be a grandma right now.”

You choke on air when she says this and Steve starts to blush again.

“Moooooommm…”

“What? I’m just saying!”

You shake your head and Steve clears his throat again, rubbing the back of his neck. “Anyway, ready for the next question?”

You nod. “I was born ready.”

Steve smiled at you as he pulled a card from the deck and began reading it. “Is condensed matter theory different from information theory? If so, ex-”

“Steeb!” your brother interrupts his question.

“Yeah little dude?” Steve’s attention is fully on the two year old now, flashcards completely forgotten once again.

“Call!” Kyle shouts, thrusting the play phone toward Steve.

“Did he call back?” he asks and your brother nods. “Gimme that,” Steve takes the phone and stands again, this time waving his hand around while he spoke. “I told you not to call me again! What do you not understand about me not wanting to be your best friend? I already have one! You know what-” he takes the play phone away from his ear and passes it to Kyle. “Here, he’s not listening to me. You talk to him.”

Kyle takes it out of Steve’s hand with a scowl and starts going on about how Steve is his best friend and to leave them alone or else while Steve threw in an occasional “yeah!” to support Kyle.

You giggle at the two of them as they continue to argue with the fake person over the play phone. You start to put your notes and flashcards away just as Kyle comes up to you with the play phone.

“For me?” you point to yourself. Kyle nods and you put the phone to your ear. “Hello?” You suddenly gasp and hand the phone back to your brother. “He said he’s gonna take me from you! That I’m gonna be his sister now!”

“No!” Kyle shouts, putting the play phone to his ear. “My sissy! Not yours!” He turns to Steve. “Steeb!”

“I got it,” he takes the phone. “Oh, so not only are you trying to steal me away from my best friend, now you’re trying to steal my girlfriend? I think not! Let me tell you something-”

Your mom watches the three of you play with the two-year-old and she can’t help but smile. Not only does Kyle have an amazing older sister, but he also has an amazing friend who would no doubt do anything for him. Your mother loves that Steve makes you and Kyle happy and hopes that he will stick around for years to come.

Little does she know, he does.

[god-monsters]

How Lookism Guys Fall in Love with YOU + personal hc

Requested. If you can't tell how repetitive I am from my masterlist, here it is all side by side to show you exactly the sort of tropes I like a LOT. Sorta hc, sorta the storylines-ish I like to write.

Strangers to Lovers

Johan Seong

Meeting Johan and bonding through his pups. You don't even need to show him kindness. Show Eden and Miro kindness and you will enter his thoughts regardless.

A cliched way to a man's heart is his stomach. Feed Johan up too to up the relationship.

Lots of emotional maturing needed for Johan to understand what the hell is going on. Pulls away to get some distance yet always ends up by your side. He can't help it. Eventually just gives in.

Goo Kim

While I personally dislike the love at first sight trope, this guy would absolutely double take if there was something that caught his eye and then he would be his normal extroverted and clingy self to get to know you.

This fucking charmer. Yes he's annoying, but even then he gets under your skin and you can't help falling for him too.

Also a fan of the hot-and-cold-casual-fuck-buddies dynamic. He'll see you every day for a week, wake up in your bed then ghost you for a month. Rinse and repeat. After a little while - oh. Goo realises he misses you.

Samuel Seo

Ah the oh-shit-I-caught-feelings-when-we-were-just-casually-fucking-and-no-strings-attached pining.

Meeting at somewhere like a corporate event or even in a club.

Lots of inner turmoil as he gets to grips with his emotions and how to deal with you. A little bit of push and pull before he eventually admits how he feels.

Ryuhei Kuroda/Xiaolong

Just meeting someone, anyone who is the opposite of Mitsuki and Vivi. Showing them what a normal healthy person, with normal healthy interests looks like. Show them kindness, show them your sweet smile, show them you don't want anything apart from just them and they will fall for you.

Ryuhei - Not really much guilt with moving on from Mitsuki because face it. They weren't exactly anything.

Xiaolong - oof. The most angsty hurt/comfort you can think of.

Friends (classmates) to Lovers

Zack Lee

Long-ish time friend, but nothing progressed due to his feelings for Mira. Gradually circumstances bring you both closer together. Tending to his wounds, school projects, maybe even shopping for a gift for Mira.

Start to see you in a new light. Deals with a lot of denial at first and then later, guilt. Unsurprisingly, it's Mira that notices the change in Zack and encourages him to pursue you.

Vasco Tabasco/Jace Park

Classmate of theirs through J-high or knew them from middle school. Help to tutor Vasco or just generally up to some shit with Jace. Maybe playing detective.

Not involved with Burn Knuckles, but you might as well be. With Vasco or Jace, the rest of the crew treats you with the same level of respect as their No.1/2 and will protect you at all costs.

Relatively straightforward friends to lovers, with all the worries of gang shit.

Vin Jin

Love the idea of Vin Jin, Mary and You being best buds together. Either from Cheonliang or you getting closer to Vin through Mary once they attend J-High.

An absolute asshole though he is a little softer towards you. Takes him a while to fall for you and see you in a new light. Is so used to you as a friend that it will take someone else interfering or an event.

See masterlist for someone asking you on a date or Vin seeing you in his Cheonliang jacket heh (the latter really breaks his brain).

Jake Kim

Childhood friend to lovers. You knew him before he joined Big Deal and/or while he was a tall lanky middle school kid.

Always had a soft spot for you. Walking you home from school, spending evenings in the library messing around, hanging in the park. Once he joined Big Deal and you started high school, it added some distance between you but Jake still could never get you off his mind.

Eventually reconciling and slow burn into lovers. Dealing with all the usual angst of Jake putting you in danger and risking your safety by being with him. Hint: he gets over it eventually. Or else it turns into angsty regret (my personal fave!).

DG/James Lee

You know him from his James Lee days and go way back. Either classmates together or another very typical show-him-a-little-kindness and then wormed your way into his heart.

Sees you more and more, and no matter what, you're never judgemental of him and you're able to talk to him like a normal human being - which is a rarity. Growing closer together until he starts to confide in you. One day, James just realises you're the closest person to him and he likes you. You have grown and grown on him until it's obvious and completely hits him over the head with it.

Progress into lovers is very straightforward. You stick with him through thick and thin. Even with his transition into DG, you're the one constant in his life that he keeps close by and protects.

Eli Jang

Know Eli from his J-high days and always been good buddies with you. Sure you could tell he's good looking but you didn't put him on a pedestal.

Eventually growing closer to him and also meeting Yenna. Which is a huge step, by the way. Eli is so goddamn protective of her and when you are both introduced he thinks 'huh? this is? nice??'. Loves the idea of a happy family.

Bit of angst dealing with the death of Heather and moving on with you.

+ Daniel Park, Jay Hong, Warren Chae, Hudson Ahn, Kwak bros

Colleague/Crew Member to Lovers

Gun Park/Goo Kim

The third partner and completing the Gun/Goo/You trifecta. Teaming up with Goo to piss off Gun or with Gun to become the sassiest, most fearsome duo and a headache for the blonde.

Eugene/Samuel Seo

Working alongside and rising through the ranks, impressing them with your competency that they have no choice but to take notice of you. They struggle treading the line between professionalism and falling for you.

Jake Kim/Sinu Han

Big Deal crew member, joining and working your way into the Boss's heart. Another one for lots of pining and slow burn as they try not to fall for you because they feel it's pretty inappropriate.

Another favourite little scenario: you working on Big Deal street. Either taking up an empty premise or working in a store or restaurant and catching their eye. Flirtation abound especially when they visit you when you should be working and prove to be an awful distraction.

[inbarfink]

The ‘Escapades‘ in TGAA1 are already such a top-tier idea. I mean, I really wish we could’ve had those in any of the other games somehow.... Overall they’re an incredibly delightful addition to the game, and taking them individually, the least good ones are still like ‘well, that was a fun little vignette for these characters, I’m just not sure if it 100% gels with the main events of the game’.

And I think my favorite one right now has to be the first one, ‘In the Defendant Antechamber’. It just does… so much great stuff to the Asoryuu dynamic, recontextualizes everything that comes after in a way that makes it even better and just feels like such an Essential Viewing for really understanding these two. 

It’s just… you can go through the entire game with Ryunosuke constantly calling Kazuma his ‘best friend’, the ‘person I trusts more than anyone else’ and you might just casually assume that these two go a long way back. Maybe not as much as Kazuma and Susato since Ryunosuke doesn’t have all the details about his childhood, but seeing how much they mean for each other, they must’ve known each other for a while, right?

NOPE

THEY MET IN COLLEGE

ABOUT A YEAR AGO

They’ve known each other for a year, just a pretty ordinary year of school, and they’re already got that Unbreakable Homoerotic Bond of Trust, and Ryunosuke is fully willing to lay down his life for the sake of Kazuma’s dream of going to London. And Kazuma is fully willing to abandon his literal Life Mission of clearing his dead father’s name and avenging him in the shame of failing to defend Ryunosuke. And he drags Ryunosuke with him to London because he knows that he’s the only one who can keep him from straying from his path. And then Ryunosuke decides to dedicate his entire life in the memory of Kazuma. His college buddy. 

But they’re not just college buddies. Because in that one year, they did forge such powerful emotional bonds that all of these actions make sense for them. Because they’re just that kind of Ridiculous Human Beings and I LOVE IT!!

And the story of how they met is just… perfection. Like, if you look at the pre-‘death’ Asoryuu dynamic, it’s very ‘Japan’s most amazing promising young lawyer-samurai is absolutely enamored with an Anxiety-Ridden Human Disaster’. Kazuma Asogi is the Proudest Moronsexual and Ryunosuke Naruhodo is dating way beyond his league.

But also….the thing that drew Kazuma to Ryunosuke in the first place is the fact that he bested him at something. Kazuma is this rising star at Yumei University, he’s got the brains and the brawn, it seems like he is poised for success and glory for the rest of his days - and then this anxious innocuous little goofball beats him… humiliates him even. Ryunosuke beat the star student of Yumei University without any ambition or ill-intention, he was just being himself, he is just this silly little linguistic dork who likes tongue-twisters. 

And Kazuma feels no real resentment or spite about this defeat. He was beaten at his own game by such a silly little guy and all he feels is respect and affection and appreciation. A desire for friendship. Maybe even love. 

And meanwhile, Ryunosuke has just kinda forgotten that this is how they met. I mean, it's not like he totally forgotten it, but... it doesn't seem to register as particularly Notable in his own memories. It's just not that important to him. That was probably a life-changing unforgettable event for Kazuma, but when Ryunosuke thinks about their friendship he just thinks about hanging out after class and eating Yakisoba together. Because that’s just the kinda guy Ryunosuke is, and I think Kazuma appreciates that just as much as his tongue-twister skills.

Also, it kinda connects to an idea I brought up in a previous post, that Kazuma Asogi is less of a direct counterpart to Miles Edgeworth and more of a… mirror image, an inversion.

Phoenix and Miles’ friendship started with Miles saving Phoenix…

A moment which was a world-changing story for Phoenix that literally defined his entire life, but Miles, although he always kept his memories of Phoenix close to his heart, can barely remember it. 

Ryunosuke and Kazuma’s friendship started with Ryunosuke beating Kazuma. A moment that is… certainly not the most important thing in Kazuma’s life, but one that has certainly made his mark on him, and one that he is not going to forget. But Ryunosuke just... doesn't really think about it unless it's directly brought up.

And it’s just… such a good piece of characterization for both of them on every thematic level, I just love it so much!!

[userautumn]

this fandom is annoying me so i'm going to say this once and then fuck off back to my shows.

on the topic of eddie's parents: helena has always treated eddie like he is an unfit parent. both of his parents have, but helena especially has led that charge. yes, his parents love him. i do not doubt that. but i said some weeks ago that i think helena/ramon would have been much happier raising eddie and chris as siblings rather than letting eddie be a father, and i stand by that. throughout the narrative, they have indicated time and time again that they think his choices are wrong—from their unwillingness to accept shannon fully, to coming outright and saying they think eddie is on a downward spiral and that he's going to crash and burn and take christopher with him. this is not an "Evil Parents" buddie conspiracy theory, this is a canon fact.

at every opportunity, helena especially has been trying to pry christopher away from his father. this is also a canon fact. in 2x18, after shannon's funeral, she tried to get eddie to bring chris (and himself, but eddie was most definitely the afterthought in that conversation) back to texas. in 4x14, eddie says to buck that his parents will fight for custody. and while eddie's relationship with his father has changed since the early seasons, this is still very much so a recurring theme in their dynamic.

so it stands to reason that helena would feel gleeful, or satisfied, or maybe even triumphant over the fact that she's finally gotten what she wanted. again, this isn't a headcanon, this is just common sense. she's been wanting chris back in texas for years, and now she's finally gotten her wish. i mentioned earlier that eddie himself is an afterthought in the conversation of the diaz boys' return to texas, and this remains true. helena favors christopher over her own son. this is also a canon fact. in 8x1, she sees her son sitting on camera at the saddest looking birthday party anyone's ever seen, and her response is "oh well! better luck next time! bye!" she doesn't offer to call him back later. she doesn't even look sad that he's sad. she simply continues about her day like her child is not suffering.

now, i still firmly believe that helena diaz loves her son. but if she has empathy for her him and the struggles he's facing—and has faced—she has yet to express it. this is also, unfortunately, canon.

having said that.

christopher is a teenager. he is not a little boy anymore. it was cute when he took an uber to buck's house because his dad made him mad, but this is quite a different situation. we've talked ad nauseam about the kim/shannon of it all because the trauma and betrayal of that is significant. but there are layers here. because it's not just that christopher thought his mom was back from the dead, it's also that eddie did what he (in christopher's mind) does best—he messed up a good thing right as christopher was getting to enjoy it.

9-1-1 is designed so that we, the viewers, are able to empathize with eddie's struggles. we're adults so, on average, we know why he makes the choices he makes and we can, on some levels, relate to them. even if we don't agree, we can understand the logic behind these choices. but christopher does not have the luxury of adulthood. and, if you put yourself in his shoes, his entire life since coming to los angeles has been extraordinarily unstable. some of these things were obviously outside of eddie's control, such as the tsunami and his dad getting shot. but they still happened.

so now, he is this fourteen year old kid who has lived through trauma after trauma, all the while witnessing his dad try to put himself back together after a lifetime of pain. and one of those ways eddie tries to put himself back together is by dating again. first, he dates ana and, objectively, ana was the perfect choice. she was smart. she was beautiful. she was good with kids. she was latina, which his parents/dad would have approved of, and christopher liked her very much. but then, just as it's getting good and looking real, eddie breaks up with her. again, we, the viewers, know why he did what he did. he was having panic attacks at the mere thought of being with her. but if you're christopher it looks like dad is pulling the plug on a good thing for no reason.

same as when eddie leaves the 118. we, adults, know eddie is struggling. hell, even christopher knows eddie is struggling. but we can understand the depths of the layers here. christopher didn't/doesn't. all he knew/knows is that, not only did his dad leave behind his job/his family/his stability, he did all that and cited him as the reason for that decision. which is why christopher said, "i never asked you to [leave the 118]." so now we fast forward to the present and we have eddie and this thing with marisol. they go on family outings, she moves in, and all these things start to feel like permanence. they start to feel like eddie has finally maybe gotten himself on solid ground and can start to enjoy his life again, or maybe for the first time.

and then he goes and cheats on marisol. with christopher's dead mom.

so we can see the multiple layers of this situation.

eddie loves his son, christopher loves his dad, and eddie diaz is a good parent. i will stand by that to the day i die, and all of these things are overwhelmingly evident. but that doesn't change the fact that the most stable home christopher has ever known is the home he lived in with his grandparents. which is sad. it's really sad to say, because we know eddie has tried so hard for that boy in so many ways. as a single parent, raising his kid to the best of his ability was so much more a full-time job than he was prepared for. but he did it. he strapped in and did the work of two people and, in doing so, it became imperative that, above all else, he gave his son a safe place to land and didn't give him reasons not to trust him because, at the end of the day, eddie is the only parent christopher has.

but eddie's broken that trust. and now, he has to live with the consequences. but let's be clear, the consequences in question are christopher's absence. helena's satisfaction over having chris in texas is an enormous insult to painful injury that must be addressed by the narrative if they ever want me to like her or believe she has eddie's best interests at heart. but this situation, in typical 9-1-1 fashion, is one in which multiple things can be, and are, true at the same time.

but relative to the matter of christopher and what he's "allowed" to do? eddie's lucky his son is even taking his calls, and he knows that. so he's going to continue to do the work to earn that trust back because he's never done anything but put in 1000% for his son. and that is also a canon fact.

[shslbunnylover]

hii!! i love your fics so much. i really wanted to request a christmas oneshot with melissa x reader. where they’re married and they decide to surprise each other gifts (the readers gift to mel is the lingerie set mel has been wanting to see in the reader).

(very spicy please with some fluff and smut)

★★★𝘼 𝙜𝙞𝙛𝙩 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙨𝙥𝙚𝙘𝙞𝙖𝙡 𝙨𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙤𝙣𝙚★★★

Character: Melissa Schemmenti

Summary: See ask above!

Requester: Anonymous

Taglist: @inlovewithgreta @lilfartbox1

Trigger warnings (DL, DI): Smut, Mommy kink, Praise, Degradation, Top Mel/Bottom reader, Dom/sun dynamics, Vaginal fingering (Reader receiving), Oral (Reader receiving), Clitoral stimulation (Reader receiving),

Genre: Smut

A/n: This was such an awesome ask! Absolutely loved this idea 🤭

Word count: 2.2k

...

...

You sat on the couch with your wife, laying your head on her chest as her hands fondled your hair, her nails occasionally scratching softly at your scalp. The smell of her perfume clouded your nostrils, leaving your brain foggy with only thoughts of her inside of it.

The outside smells of cookies made and candles burned were nothing more than an afterthought when your body was engulfed in the scent of your wife,

"I still don't understand how nobody at the checkout mentioned a girlfriend, like at all," Melissa's laugh broke you out of your thoughts, her eyes rolling at the ridiculous scene playing on the TV in front of you two.

"That would have been an interesting conversation, because knowing Buddy, he would have said something like 'It's for my dad actually', you know? I wish they had added that in the movie," You replied, adjusting yourself so that your head lay on the redhead's shoulder.

"I wonder how awkward that would be to film though," Melissa thought, her soft and nimble fingers wrapping strands of your hair around themselves mindlessly as if it were natural to her. "But the bloopers must be even more fun to watch,"

As the scene where Walter Hobbs is opening the gift naively given by Buddy played on the TV screen, you looked up to see your wife licking her lips with a smirk before speaking.

"Say, I'd like to see you in that," She nudged you, causing you to laugh.

"I don't think I'd look good in it," You giggled, burying your face into her out of embarrassment and the thought of yourself in such an underwear set.

"Oh come on hon," Melissa rolled her head back, looking at you with raised eyebrows and an even fatter grin. "That body of yours would fit perfectly into it, and it'd match your face, all red like that,"

You stuck your tongue out at your wife, narrowing your eyes while a new idea found its way into your head. You looked back down at the screen to watch the rest of the movie, leaving you with a miniature smirk on your lips.

You spent the rest of that week trying to find the same lingerie set from the movie, hoping to get it in time for Christmas as a surprise for Melissa.

"Damn it, why is the evil Jeff Bezos website not working?" You groaned, putting your head in your hands, closing the computer, and placing your elbow on the cold steel shell of the device.

"What's wrong hon?" Your wife asked, opening the door to your shared bedroom, only to see you visibly frustrated.

"It's nothing, my love," You smiled, pulling her in for a soft kiss.

"Alright..." Melissa looked at you with a doubtful look, squeezing your shoulder before leaving to take a shower.

You sighed, looking out the window to admire the darkness of the night, smiling softly as you noticed a couple of snowflakes stick to the window before eventually melting from the warmth of the glass.

You thought hard for a moment before you felt a lightbulb go off in your head.

"Ava..."

"So, it's usually about 40 bucks off my shop, but because you're my employee and my best friend, it's half off," Ava smiled mischievously at the situation you were in.

"Thanks, Ava," You rolled your eyes, handing her the cash before grabbing the bag. "We will never talk about this, Amazon was down," You blushed.

"Will do, baby boo," The principal smirked, shooing you away to resume watching Love Island.

You shot your friend the middle finger, shutting the door to her office, and stuffing the bag inside your purse.

When Christmas morning finally arrived after what seemed like just a blink of an eye, a warm blanket of silence covered the house. It had been such a hectic morning of gifts and surprises that the silence felt good. The two of you sat side by side, taking in the moment and the ardency of one another. The fire brought a comfortable warmth around you, and a delicious breakfast made by your wife sat untouched on the table, as it was meant for later. All that mattered now was sharing the day together and enjoying the silence. No sounds of unwrapping or exclamations of surprise, just the calm air lingering between you two while you looked through the photo book Melissa had given you.

"So Princess, do you like it?" Melissa asked, watching as you held a soft photo book from your wedding.

"I love it so much Mel," You replied, tears brimming at your eyes as you flipped through each photo, laughing softly at the goofy ones.

"But, I still have one more gift to give you," You smiled, shooting her a wink and standing up to go to your bedroom to get changed into the surprise.

Your partner sat there while you got dressed, texting Barbara a thank you for the help with the photo book, unaware of the spicy surprise waiting for her.

You swiftly pulled the straps to the lingerie onto your shoulders, your fingers moving to graze softly on the fluffy edges of the fabric.

"You almost done in there, hon?" Melissa laughed at how long you were taking while she cleaned up the wrapping paper.

"Y-Yeah I'll be out in a second!" You replied, opening the door and stepping out into the hallway.

Your arms folded in front of your body as you walked behind Melissa, tapping her softly on the shoulder and watching her turn around swiftly.

"So, what-" The redhead was cut off by the sight of you in the lingerie.

Her mouth was hanging slightly open, all the moisture in there going straight to her core.

The lingerie sat tightly against your body, showing off every inch of your figure. A warm red fabric with white trimming covered the top part of the outfit, clinging to your curves and framing your breasts beautifully. You paired the underwear with a pair of white fishnets and red lipstick, as you knew Melissa loved when you wore that shade of red.

"Oh...Jesus Christ Hon," Melissa gasped, walking up to you and cupping your breast with her hand and your chin with the other. "You look delicious," She practically groaned, pinching your nipple tightly to elect a whimper from you.

"F-Fuck-" You let your head fall onto her clavicle, biting your lip almost as roughly as your wife was being with your tits.

Her palm fell from your chin, pushing you back from her embrace to get the perfect view. Her soft and gentle fingers trailed over your exposed skin, your flesh raising once the tips finally left the area.

"I can't believe this is all mine, these tits, this face, everything about you," Your wife spoke in a husky tone, moving her lips to your neck, leaving soft blue marks on your otherwise [skin color] skin.

"P-Please Mel-" You pleaded, the pain causing the heat in your core to bubble up.

"Ah ah ah-" She tutted, pinching your nub tighter. "What do you call me?"

"Mommy..." You corrected yourself, pressing your body against her, moving your hips so your clit rubbed up against her thigh.

The older woman quickly and harshly swatted your button, watching with a grin as you shivered from the sudden sting.

"Good girl..." The redhead chuckled. "Now, I'm gonna take full advantage of this Christmas present," She spoke, grabbing you and dragging you upstairs.

When she finally made her way to your bedroom, she pushed you onto the bed with a simple flick of her hand, her green eyes watching how your tits bounced as your back hit the mattress like a predator stalking its prey before going to devour it.

"Please do mommy, I got this just for you," You breathed out, spreading your thighs apart to reveal your soaked cunt.

The redhead's emerald eyes widened, and an amused expression made its way onto her facial features.

"Fuck...now this is the bow on top," Melissa licked her lips, wasting no time and immediately burying her face in you, her tongue working wonders as it plunged in and out of you, only pausing to k the tips of her fingers.

Her digits swiftly went to rub on your clit, moving in circles that shot chills up your spine.

Your body was engulfed in a deep warm feeling that started from within and spread out to the rest of your body. Your brain clouded with nothing but a feeling of intense pleasure, relaxation, and even ecstasy as you cried out her name.

"Yeah princess, taste so good," Your wife hummed into your sensitive pussy, the soft vibrations adding to the waves of pleasure pulsating throughout your body

You can feel yourself breathing heavily and panting as your body began to tremble with pleasure.

"Mommy, I-I...Oh God!" You cried, your legs shaking violently from the stimulation on your sensitive button.

Your hand dug into her hair, your thighs clenching around the sides of her head.

Her tongue flicked around your folds, the sweet taste of your release settling on her tastebuds as she savored each lick she gave to your sensitive pussy. Her green eyes rolled back into her head, internally questioning how someone could taste as addicting and as delicious as you did.

But she wasn't done with you. She wanted to hold off your release for as long as possible like always. She was always such a tease, and with your new outfit, the redhead only wanted to watch your body squirm around even more than usual.

"Such a fucking whore," Melissa sighed, removing her mouth from your pussy to your dismay, releasing a laugh from her pretty pink lips when you let out a pleading moan.

The redhead ran her hand through her hair, licking her lips clean of your juices before running her hands up and down your body, squeezing at your breasts to elect more of your delicious sounds for her to relish in.

"Please, Mommy, don't tease!" You whimpered, rubbing your thighs for any sense of relief from the ache between your legs.

Melissa didn't respond to your whines and pleas, only spreading your legs with her strong hands.

"Surprising me with lingerie, knowing I'd fuck your brains out," She growled, bending down to kiss your neck, nibbling at your earlobe before plunging three of her fingers inside your tight hole.

Your toes curled tightly and your back arched, your hands that were gripping at the sheets the only thing keeping you from going completely off the edge.

"Oh f-fuck!" You choked out, your voice turning into a mixture of whimpers and cries as your wife's slender fingers rubbed up against your walls, collecting a white ring at the bottom that increased in visibility the more she pumped in and out of your tight walls.

"Yeah, such a good girl, taking my fingers with your pretty pussy," Melissa muttered, trailing her mouth down your figure before finally attaching her lips to your puffy clit, giving you the much-needed relief.

"Ahh~!! God! I'm going to come! Going to come!" You practically sobbed, your eyes rolling back into your head, the feeling of the redhead sucking on your sensitive nub too much for you to handle.

Just because of her fingers' movements, carefully perfected after years of being your partner, your body immediately became nothing more than a malleable and shaking sex puddle.

"God damn it, you're so easy hon," Your wife smirked, her expression predatory and seductive as she edged you on, her thrusts increasing in speed before slowing down whenever you were about to finish.

"Only for you- Please- Mommy, I need to come!" You cried out, wrapping your hands around Melissa's biceps for more connection to her, your fingernails leaving soft crescent moon indents in her milky skin.

"Then do it baby, make a mess on my fingers and my face," Melissa purred, giving your clit tiny little kitten licks with her agile tongue.

"Fu-Fuck-!! Mommy~!!" You screamed, your back relaxing as the relaxation from your release took over your body, a soft 'oomph' coming from the mattress once your body fully hit the soft plush.

You laid there, your eyes hooded and legs shaking, watching as Melissa sat down next to you, pulling you onto her lap.

"That- Holy shit..." You muttered, unable to say anything else due to the fogginess inside of your head.

The redhead opened your mouth, pushing one of her soaked digits inside, allowing you to clean it whilst tasting yourself.

"I think that was my favorite gift this year," She winked suggestively, pulling out of your mouth.

"I'm glad," You laughed, your head clearing up from how dumb-fucked you were. "Merry Christmas, my love,"

"Merry Christmas Amore," Melissa smiled, stroking away the hair that clung to your forehead. "Why don't we go get that breakfast I made? I don't want it getting cold after all,"

"Good idea," You agreed, attempting to stand up, only for your wife to sweep you off your feet and into her arms.

"I think you need to give these things a little rest," She teased, squeezing your thigh softly before making her way down the stairs.

...

If you enjoyed reading this, don't forget to like, reblog and comment! Thank you and you are loved <3

-Akira

[snows-2am-thoughts]

Uh so Gravity Falls x The Owl House is canon?! This is the best moment of my life guys

I'd like to think Luz decides to investigate anomalies on Earth when she can since Eda had told her weird stuff on Earth was just magic leaking from the Boiling Isles. She decides on Gravity Falls because it seems that's where the biggest traces of weirdness are. Mabel and Dipper decide to go back to Gravity Falls or attend college near there after high school because it's their home and they've already been away for long enough (and lets be real, everyone besides the stans are probably still there because it's a small town and families hardly ever leave those). Dipper studies paranormal sciences or an applied research major or both and helps continue studying Gravity Falls after he graduates since Ford is off on adventures with Stan. Mabel is studying Fashion Design or Graphic Design with a minor in Photography (the sweaters and scrapbooking stuck) and is now determined to make something (I'm thinking like a fashion line, plushies, or even a cartoon/comic series since she's very creative) inspired by the weirdness of Gravity Falls. 

Luz and the twins end up meeting by chance when they're researching some of the more elusive creatures and they just kind of pause when seeing each other.

Luz: *is sweating nervously because she thinks the twins are freaked out*

Dipper and Mabel: *are sweating nervously because the last time someone found out about the weirdness the FBI got involved*

I think after a very long and awkward conversation they'd actually be really excited to know there are other humans who are open to the weirdness! Luz spent her life not thinking she'd be able to fit in around other humans and the twins have probably felt a little outcasted since they'd been through something no one outside a select few in Gravity Falls can relate to. 

Hijinks ensue. Luz and Mabel feed off of each other's bubbliness and high energy personalities. Luz and Dipper are now combining their research with Luz's knowledge of the Boiling Isles and Dipper's knowledge of the mysteries of Gravity Falls. Luz ends up taking them to the Boiling Isles to introduce them to everyone and suddenly the twins feel like they're at home. Everything is going great until they recognize Eda as a woman from one of Grunkle Stan's old pictures and now they're on a mission to locate their grunkles from whatever adventure they're on to bring them to the Boiling Isles. Stan and Eda reunion (very awkward at first because they're cautious of lingering feelings from the other but they're both well established in life now and so the awkwardness fades, chaos buddies are back) as well as both sets of twins getting to explore the Boiling Isles.

Luz now has a human based support system that isn't her mother which helps her feel ok in her humanity. The twins are able to talk about their experiences with someone who understands and even thrives in the weirdness. 

Dipper and Luz experiment and find new combinations of King's titan glyphs while Mabel and Luz work on a campaign to introduce the two worlds to each other while preventing the creation of more witch hunters or the FBI from being scared because yeesh they don't wanna repeat their trauma. 

Dynamics between the gangs! I think Hunter and Soos would be an awesome pair of bros and I could totally see Amity and Wendy being the cool and composed duo of their respective groups. Luz, Willow, Amity, Mabel and Wendy having a girls night because lord knows they need it. The boys (Hunter, Gus, Dipper and Soos) simultaneously have a boys night but it’s Dipper introducing them to BABBA and Hunter having them carve wood while Soos and Gus try to spook them. Somehow the two groups end up combining and now it’s just a big sleepover with everyone getting into shenanigans. 

King and Mabel would be besties and I can totally see her making little sweaters for him so they can match. Luz catches on and now we have three matching besties. Eda and Stan fuel each other’s gambling habits while Ford and Raine stand on the sidelines getting ready to bail them out. Dipper and Willow would totally get along and I can see them researching the more unique plants of the Boiling Isles together. Gus and Dipper discuss the differences in the worlds of witches and humans. Hunter would introduce the palismans to Mabel and she’d start sprucing up their homes and making them little sweaters. Waddles meant everything to her and if she could help them find homes then she would. 

The Collector visits and all of a sudden the GF group gets PTSD from Bill because ‘oh looks its another all powerful interdimensional being.’ When questioned about it the Collector gets concerned and decides to look into it.

The Collector: *concerned because he knows how he was when he didn’t understand human mortality and thinks this ‘Bill’ just needs to be informed* “YEESH nevermind this guys a mess, you don’t have to worry, he’s being forced into interdimensional therapy. I wouldn’t put it past him to try his old tricks though so don’t make any deals or trust anything triangular’

The GF crew: “HE’S ALIVE????”

The GF group is lowkey paranoid after that because they risked so much to make sure Bill couldn’t hurt them again and the TOH group has to comfort them because they understand. The Collector is assuring them that he’s watching out for them so they don’t have to be too paranoid. The groups go back to doing what they're doing. 

I lowkey wanna see Mabel learning magic while Dipper is lowkey just fine studying and researching since actually doing the magic stuff lost its appeal when Bill possessed him. I haven’t even thought of what Mabel’s palisman would end up being

…. WHO AM I KIDDING, IT'S PROBABLY A MINI WADDLES

OR A LLAMA

Or maybe like a squirrel or beaver, Stan’s would definitely be a crow but he and Ford probably are a little put off of doing magic themselves because of similar reasons to Dipper. Actually, maybe Stan would be a little more open since Eda is there and he knows that while she’s mischievous and a troublemaker, she’s nothing like Bill. If Ford and Dipper did wanna learn magic I think Ford gives off hawk palisman vibes while Dipper’s is definitely an owl. I just realized that all the Pines besides Mabel have bird palismans in this. That’s actually pretty good angst potential. 

I COULD WRITE SO MUCH MORE AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I WANT TO WRITE A FIC

I AM GONNA WRITE A FIC

[sapphicdib]

Your cycle consumes itself. What have you become?

(ˡᵒʳᵉ ᵈᵘᵐᵖ ᵇᵉˡᵒʷ ᶜᵘᵗ)

SO THIS IS MY INV VS SAINT AU!! It started as a shitpost and uh. Spiralled. Out of control. And now it’s genuine lol.

Enot and Saint are basically mortal enemies, and Saint needs to get Enot OUT OF THE CYCLES in order to continue his work, because this damn horny bastard won’t stop hunting him down…for some reason. Isn’t ascension the greatest gift you can bestow upon the creatures suffering in this barren wasteland? At least Saint thinks that. Inv, on the other hand, does not.

Enot stumbles upon Pebbles while passing through the silent construct, trying to find food one day. He takes a liking to this half-dead pink toaster, bringing him scraps of fabric as blankets and lanterns, and the best part…talking to him. Inv, somehow, can talk to iterators. And despite Pebbles’ very limited ability to reply, he does appreciate the company, and slowly the cycles become less agonizing. Pebbles has a friend. However, when Saint finds him, his immediate reaction is to attempt to ascend him—and he is tackled by a very angry slugcat, hissing and spitting at him in defence of its friend.

When Saint attempts to ascend him, he misses, just barely clipping Enot’s tail and glitching him half-out of reality. He then realizes, to his horror, that his karma seems to be draining. Whatever the hell this thing is, it’s dangerous, and Saint retreats to restore his karma (and heal some of the nasty wounds Enot gave him).

Inv turns back to see Pebbles, staring at him in pure fear, before he simply whispers out a “Thank…you…”. And that’s when Inv makes it his mission to save Pebbles (and everyone else) from Saint.

This leads to Inv running around the map, hot on Saint’s heels, trying to get any and all the iterators to figure out a way to get off their damn strings and LIVE again! Most of them are collapsed or semi-collapsed, so it’ll be an uphill battle, but when a glitchy, teleporting slugcat with the ability to speak tells you to do something…you’d be kinda inclined to do it.

Anyways the reason Enot can’t be ascended is because he is happy to give in to every single one of the great taboos. Wrath, Lust, Friendship, Gluttony, and Self Preservation. He revels in them. And if he can help the others experience them, and become happy with living again, they’ll be immune too! Also he is ridiculously OP to the point of him basically just having DevTools active because I think it’s Funny. He can glitch-teleport and drains the karma of beings around him. He also talks super casually and I think it’s funny.

A little bit of their dynamic hehe:

“Hey, pal!”

“I would like you to stop calling me that, please. You may call me the Saint.”

“Ahah. Not happening.”

“You are incredibly disrespectful.”

“Hey man, I’m not the one calling myself a saint but then running around killing shit and acting like it’s a good thing.”

“You use such vulgar words. I ascend beings, freeing them from the torment of these endless cycles. It is my purpose.”

“Even the ones who don’t want to go? Bro, you don’t even ask. The last robot you almost merked was screaming “no wait” at you, and you still think you’re in the right here? You’re not some kind of righteous saint, that’s called being a fuckin’ serial killer.”

“You do not understand what you are talking about!”

“Whoa, buddy! Are you gettin’ mad? Ain’t that…a lil taboo? PFFT look at your face!”

“I am not tolerating this any longer. Goodbye.”

That’s all I can think of rn! Send asks if you like!

[in1-nutshell]

Hello Hello, so I have this image in my head of a human buddy leading a Cybertronian through a bunch of nature and their positivity and interests in all things green convinces them to appreciate it to. There’s very much a big creature and little creature type of friendship with buddy using their small size (compared to Cybertronians) to tease them

Ohhh! Love that Big bot and small buddy dynamic! Since you didn't say what continuity of Transformers or any specific characters, I took some random characters and randomly picked one of them. If you want another specific character just request when the inbox is open again.

Hope you enjoy!

Human Buddy showing some nature to Grimlock

SFW, platonic, Human reader

RiD 2015

It was a boring day at the scrap yard. The team was taking things a bit easier as the Decepticon activity had gone down. Less patrols and more free time. It didn’t take too long for some members of the team to grow restless of being stuck in the scrap yard. The best solution was to simply go out for a drive.

Well, everyone could except Grimlock.

“C’mon Bee! I’ll even wear my disguise so no one can see me!”--Grimlock

Bumblebee looking at the dumpster fire of a disguse that Grimlock is referring to as a disguse.

“Yeah… just wait until Strongarm or Sideswipe come back and have them tow you.”--Bumblebee

“Why can’t you do it?”--Grimlock

“I’m not planning on throwing out my back struts just yet.”--Bumblebe

Buddy decided to help with that problem.

“Psst! Grimlock!”--Buddy

“Buddy?”--Grimlock

“Shh!”--Buddy

“Oh okay. What’s up?”--Grimlock

“We are going out at night. Just you and me.”--Buddy

“Cool!—”--Grimlock

“Shh!”--Buddy

“Where are we going?”--Grimlock

“It’s a surprise Grimmy. A good surprise!”--Buddy

Soon enough evening came in, and Buddy was ready to execute Phase 2 of their plan…

Sneak Grimlock out without anyone knowing.

After a series of silly shenanigans Buddy had successfully gotten Grimlock out of the yard. How did they do it? They don’t even know, its just their luck.

“C’mon Grim! We’re home free!”--Buddy

“Do you think anyone is going to notice us gone?”--Grimlock

“Nah. It’ll be a bit before anyone really notices anything.”--Buddy

Bumblebee reading his data pad and stopping.

The ‘Dad’ Sense is tingling.

“…Somethings wrong…”—Bumblebee

Now their next stop.

Grimlock had offered to give Buddy a ride as they were reaching rougher terrain.

“You need some help there?”--Grimlock

Looking at the big rocks

“… If you don’t mind…”--Buddy

After a bit of walking the two reached a small patch of green. The long blades of grass tickled at Grimlock’s pedes.

“Hey, put me down a sec. I’m gonna show you the surprise!”--Buddy

Buddy stood in the waist high grass then started running a bit in the grass. Little lights appeared.

“Wow!”--Grimlock

“Fireflies Grimlock! Here’s your surprise!”--Buddy

“What’s a firefly? Wait, are they going to hurt you?! Are they safe for bots?!”--Grimlock

“…Buckle up Grimlock. I’m about to info dump so much buggy knowledge on that Dino brain of yours…”--Buddy

As Buddy started ranting all about the little buggy’s, they instructed Grimlock to gently wave his tail over the top of the grass. More little lights appeared with the movement of the grass.

“This is fun!”--Grimlock

“I know right! So much better than hearing Bee trying to come up with a catchphrase in secret!”--Buddy

Meanwhile with Bumblebee.

“…Somehow I feel insulted…”--Bumblebee

They eventually laid down on the grass and began looking at the stars. Buddy soon began ranting about fun facts about fireflies and some astronomy. Grimlock, while he didn’t understand everything, he listened intently.

“What star sign do you think I am Buddy?”--Grimlock

“Hmm… I don’t know maybe a—”--Buddy

“Grimlock!”--Bumblebee

“No not that—”--Buddy

“Buddy, I know you’re there too! You two are coming back to the scrapyard with me!”--Bumblebee

“…”—Grimlock and Buddy

Grimlock tossing Buddy in his servos and running the opposite direction.

“GRIMLOCK RUN! HE’S GAINING ON US!”--Buddy

“Get back here!”--Bumblebee

“You’ll never take us alive!”--Buddy

“Wait what?!”--Grimlock

“Don’t worry Grimmy, I got us covered! Now run!”--Buddy

[snackugaki]

idk man, softshells are vicious

*continues screaming below the cut*

ololololollollolooll— the peepaw multiverse tried to infect me with a sad, embattled f!Leo but my body ended up forcing it to mutate because while I love a good soul-crushing angst premise, I’m a comedy and rule of cool girl at heart. and like... war feels like constant sorrow, grief, unending violence and fighting but... it isn’t, there’s lulls and quiet moments and your siblings don’t stop being siblings even then, especially then

and to clarify, all that weird shit the kids might have heard about Next Mutation, love triangles, Donnie and Venus fighting etc. take it from me, someone who was the target tv demographic when it was first airing, it wasn’t that bad. it was bad because it was just really bad children’s television during 90s Turtlemania. Just real corny shit (affectionate). Fighting dragons with a widow’s peak to rival Vegeta’s, vampires who look like if Betty Page and Prince Adam made a baby in the lycra section of Hustler Hollywood, just terrible fun with 90s children’s tv production values.

however when I rewatched the show as an adult (after finding my soul when it cringed out of my body and across 293740293751 dimensions), one of my takeaways was Donnie and Vee absolutely were BFFs, it’s fun it’s silly and goddamnit I am a little tired of tech vs magic, why not tech and magic? a bitch loves a good team up with unlikely partners is what I’m saying. IDW Donnie and Venus shaping up to look like best buddies too, maybe, hopefully, wishing. but if any iteration was gonna have the besties/worsties dynamic, i’d feel like it’d be Rise.

...

i need you all to understand that Donnie is not running around naked in my future au, it’s just I started sketching before I realized I’d have to design a future!Donnie.

... i mean I was going to for the fun but I just really needed this out of my brain first. so like... pretend he’s wearing something cool pls, thnks.

[prince-liest]

Omg, I just wanted to say I ADORE your characterization of Al and Vox! I don't even have the words to express how much I love reading your stuff, especially the Anon responses you post on here. The behind the scenes thoughts are literally my food, lifesource, its so good when people not only write characters IN CHARACTER, but also include stuff about their analysis/understanding of the character too.. I'm literally obsessed with breaking down characters and yk, cracking their chrome domes open to see how they work (which admittedly, I am not the best at <_< but I love reading them). Just wanted to say how much I love your writing. I had maybe 2 questions, please don't feel pressured to answer them :>

What in your mind (in reference to the 66.6 fics) would motivate Alastor to let Val get close to him in the first place? Or was that more you picking these two characters up by the scruff of their necks and plopping them into a hypothetical scenario to explore their character and write some fun intimate thingsTM?

What do you think of the dynamic of Vox and Al vs something like Lucifer and Al? Personally I've noticed that something Alastor craves, behind the mask of his static smiling persona, is attention. He's (at least how I saw it) usually peeved when people don't care about his absence, and seems especially bothered by the King of Hell refusing to really acknowledge him, so he goes out of his way to push Lucifers buttons (like calling himself a father figure to Charlie, IN FRONT OF HER ACTUAL FATHER LOL) whereas with Vox, Vox is literally CONSTANTLY thinking about Alastor. Man literally interrupted his regular TV program to do a segment about how much he totally didn't at ALL care about Alastors dissapearance or the fact that he returned (suree buddy). So Alastor can have more fun with him and annoy him by ignoring and messing with him on purpose.

ty if you do respond to this, sorry if it was hard to understand, sometimes I forget how to put the thoughts in my brain into coherent words!

Ahhhh, thank you very much, anon! I'm especially happy that you're enjoying my commentary on Tumblr, haha - I spent a while on Twitter because that's where all the fandom zines I was in were being hosted, but nothing beats Tumblr for giving me a nigh-unlimited word count and a captive audience for my rambling! >:D <3 I'm back to cocooning myself on the OG hell site.

Thank you for this ask, it really brightened my day! :D

As for your questions:

1. I'm assuming that was a typo and that you mean Vox (but in case you did mean Val: that was just a funny accident of him walking by the room! Alastor wasn't paying enough attention until it was too late), and to that I say:

I think Alastor allows Vox to take a go at him in canon because he finds Vox's obsession with him to be entertaining, but also because Alastor is kind of a narcissist and that same obsession massively feeds his ego, especially in a political climate that otherwise forgot about Alastor. Vox's whole "Who gives a shit about Alastor coming back?! Haha, now let me have a public meltdown and short out power to the whole city about it! Oh, fuck, why is he back, though?? Can we send a spy in to find out??" is exactly the reaction that Alastor wants every time he mentions his mysterious absence and gets brushed off.

At the same time, Alastor doesn't seem to register Vox as a sincere and genuine threat. He's a big enough fish in the Pride Ring pond that his obsession with Alastor is gratifying, but Alastor's self-absorption also doesn't really allow him to treat Vox as a threat tier above "annoying in a funny way, and also television is stupid." (Perhaps this will change in season 2... :eyes: (or perhaps Alastor will get Even Worse) (please god let him get even worse))

So those two things in combination make Vox the perfect candidate for Alastor to experiment with while maintaining his ego and not feeling particularly threatened. Despite Vox's Safeword 101 talk, Alastor would never put stock into that system with Vox unless he was certain that he himself would be able to back up a 'no' with overwhelming force. Him even considering safewords in the Live On Air! series is less for his own sake and more a politesse he offers on Vox's request to warn Vox to slow the fuck down before Alastor tries to put his insides on the outside.

2. And in direct contrast, we have Lucifer...

... Who Alastor obviously actually cares quite a bit about, because he's a whole nother power tier from both Vox and Alastor, and furthermore and possibly even more importantly, a credible threat to Alastor's relationships and standing in the hotel. I think a lot of discussion I see about Alastor prodding Lucifer seems to talk about how quickly he got annoyed about Lucifer's comments, but that misses the fact that he was pissed off before Lucifer even showed up. He got pissy the moment he saw the welcome sign, actually! And I wager that he was narratively absent for the scene where Charlie actually calls Lucifer because he would have done his best to manipulate her out of doing so had be been there.

And given that the two clearly haven't met before (though obviously Alastor knows of Lucifer - and hates that the inverse isn't true, hah), it's not 100% clear exactly why he's immediately so annoyed, but in my personal view of things and barring something like "he's projecting onto Lucifer because his contract is with Lilith," I think that what we know of Alastor's personality points most strongly to "he liked being the hotel's benefactor and sees it as His Project, and doesn't like the idea that Charlie called daddy for something that she thought mysterious, powerful Alastor couldn't handle." He distracts a lot with obviously-goading comments about practically being Charlie's dad in his duet with Lucifer, but underneath that he puts a lot of emphasis on the work he's done for the hotel and the fact that he's been supporting Charlie and the hotel from the start, so why the fuck is this deadbeat asshole suddenly turning up?!

Tl;dr: Charlie missed her insight roll on Alastor's personal investments and he's sooooo offended - and taking it out on Lucifer!

I think one of my favorite things about both Lucifer and Alastor is that they both sooo obviously belong in the Pride Ring, hahaha.

[joanofexys]

hello!! :) I already asked in a comment but I shall bother you again in an ask so you can make a proper post <3 I would LOVE to know more about angels (AND PHOEBE'S BECAUSE HELLO??) relations with the canon cast!!

Yippee!! I love talking about Angel

Idk how this will be broken down exactly but it’s probably gonna get long as hell so be warned

Obviously Angel’s best friend is Harper. And no one will replace her, but he does still have great relationships with the foxes

I mentioned previously that he ends up with the monsters so he’s the closest with them, but he still gets on well with the upper classmen

In another ask abt him I mentioned he has a FWB dynamic with Allison. And he and Kevin def have something going on. That’s obviously all when Phoebe isn’t with him so I’ll probably focus most of this on his relationship with everyone while he has Phoebe with him

In that same ask I mentioned that Phoebe has favorites too. They’re Andrew and Kevin. And she has a habit of asking for Neil and screaming her lungs out if anyone else tries to touch her or play with her, but Neil has no clue what to do with her.

Idk I guess I'll just go through each of them one by one

Neil: Neil and Angel are both members of the serial killer father club and they're obligated to bond through that. For realsies though Neil helps Angel feel less out of place, as odd as that sounds. Obviously all the foxes have their issues and he was well aware of their reputation when he signed with them, but there's only so many of them that are visibliy fucked up. I think I've mentioned this before but all of Angel's scars have keloided, so they're raised scar tissue, and he's just covered them. And it's 100% been an insecurity of his even though he's accepted that it's something he just has to live with. And when he first joins the foxes very little about his situation and why he's there is unknown. They know about the foster homes and he has a lot of scars. But obviously when more about his past comes out there's a lot that he can share with Neil. With Neil he's able to feel like he's not being stared at all the time, that he's not getting weird looks everywhere he goes. And Neil doesn't tell Angel everything but he'll sit there and listen and let Angel feel like he's got someone who understands at least a little bit. And they play very well together. Stiker/backliner duos my beloved. Angel is very willing to defend Neil, violently, on the court (and Kevin too). Tbh he's probably responsible for a lot of their yellow and red cards his freshman year. Sometimes they'll go running together. Idk man, they're just buddies. And Phoebe, like a cat who can tell when someone isn't a cat person, fucking loves Neil. Neil still doesn't know what to do with her but sometimes she gets to sit on his lap while he's on the couch or a beanbag chair

Andrew: In the beginning, Andrew fucking Minyard is responsible for at least half of Angel's panic attacks and spirals. Angel's freshman year he moves in before the school year starts and he and Phoebe take a room at Abby's place and the monsters have to move around a bit, but basically they're all around the same area during the summer. And obviously, since they're sharing space with him, Andrew wants to know who the fuck Angel even is. And it is very easy to find.

Matteo Di Fiore, charged with the murders of 12 women, including his own wife. Di Fiore plead guilty to the murders of 12 adult women, including his wife, Sofia Di Fiore, over the course of 10 years. Di Fiore received max sentencing and leaves behind a teenage son, who authorities did not name, and was not present at the trial...

Idk something like that. There's definitely plenty of articles out there about his father and that mention he has a son and it's not very difficult to the connect the dots. That's the easy part. It's a lot harder to find out about the foster homes and everything before that, about what happened when Angel was still with his dad. But Andrew makes it very clear he knows. And it's a sort of open secret throughout the summer. Something no one will actually address but that they all know. Angel won't lie about it, but it's definitely something he prefers people don't know. They get better though and Andrew stops freaking Angel out. Because Andrew eventually adopts Angel pretty much. Why? Because he's got sad eyes and he's like a fucking kicked puppy whenever he's not in dad mode or whenever he's in stressed out dad mode.

And like I mentioned, Andrew is one of Phoebe's favorites. He does give her way too much sugar sometimes. She's the only one welcome to share his candy stash. And she loves to chat his ear off with her little toddler babble.

Kevin: Kevin motherfucking Day. Another one of Phoebe's favorites. And also Angel's favorite. It's another case of striker/backliner duo got me good. They make sick. They just work, okay? They're incredible on the court together and Angel will obviously snark back at Kevin but he's also someone who listens so intensely to ever piece of criticism, advice, and nonsensical ranting that Kevin throws his way. Angel's anxiety isn't as bad as Kevin's to begin with but he is also one of those friends whose anxiety will just stop existing the second there's someone more anxious than him. So he and Kevin work great. Emotion support dog Angel or whatever the fuck symbolism we've got going on. I'm just now realizing Angel is dog coded. They nap on bus rides together (Phoebe sits up front with Wymack). They watch Trojans games together. They study together. Angel listens to Kevin rant about history. Kevin listens to Angel ramble about classics. I feel very strongly about them but I'm trying not to make it weird.

Phoebe is around him so much I think he's become one of her favorites that way. Also he's tall, still shorter than Angel rip, and good for piggy back rides. She definitely naps on him a lot while he watches games and Angel gets a much needed break to study and get some homework done.

Aaron: They have to be friends. There's just no way they're not atp. Like Angel and Harper are exes but they're still best friends and definitely do double dates with Aaron and Katelyn. He is a trusted babysitter and kateaaron kick ass when on babysitting duty. He is, unfortunately, not Phoebe's favorite but she can tell him apart from Andrew and knows it's okay to run up to him, yelling his name, and expect to be picked up. Aaron and Angel hang out with the vixens together. Aaron is definitely closer friends with Harper than he is with Angel but they have no problem hanging out together and they don't really fight or anything. Angel definitely admires Aaron for his career goals and how passionate he is about becoming a doctor especially because, even in college, Angel has no clue what he wants to do with the rest of his life and he can appreciate that Aaron has a set goal.

Nicky: Nicky definitely brings out a much louder part of Angel. They joke flirt. Angel is very much okay with being a recipient of Nicky's affection while also having zero problems setting boundaries with him. And obviously Nicky fucking adores Phoebe. They're not best friends, if they're not with the rest of the monsters they probably don't ever hang out, but they do have a lot of fun together when they're with each other.

Allison: Allison and Angel know how to have fun. Allison is one of those people in Angel's life that could get him to agree to crazy shit he would never agree to do otherwise. And he just fucking loves. They're excellent friends and love to talk shit and go on coffee runs together. Most of their time together is when Harper has Phoebe, but Allison does love P whenever she's around. If she's doing her makeup and Phoebe shows any interest she'll pretend to do P's makeup too and tell her she looks so pretty

Renee: I think they have the weirdest dynamic ever. Angel and Renee just kind of exist together. Two traumatized fuckers trying to better than their pasts with angel wings tattooed on their back. Renee offers to teach him to fight and respects it when he says no. When Angel needs somewhere quiet he knows he can always shoot Renee a text and just come sit with her. P loves her hair and loves her and always draws Renee rainbows

Dan: Angel has so much respect for Dan. I don't think they're particularly close but he does know he can always come to her even if she's not the first person he'd seek out. She's someone reliable and in his eyes she really seems like she's got her shit together. I think Dan leaves him a little starstruck tbh. Dan is also Phoebe's favorite fox to cheer for at games. Not her favorite off the court (though Phoebe still loves her) but definitely her favorite on the court

Matt: I think Angel's relationship with Matt is similar to his relationship with Dan. He sort of views them as a package deal (which is the same way he views himself and Harper tbh). He likes being around Matt and really respects him as another backliner. They never really fight on the court, or off of it, and they also just don't have many super personal conversations. I think after it comes out that they've got another dumbass kid with a serial killer dad on the team I think Matt pulls Angel aside for a "hey dude. please please please don't be like Neil" and they form a sort of truce where Angel basically promises not to do any of the dumb shit Neil did the year prior and Matt promises not to revoke his offer of babysitting.

Wymack, Abby, and Bee: Was gonna do these guys separately and I could do them all separately but this is getting too long and I need to wrap it up. Wymack is just someone Angel is so beyond grateful for. He's always willing to watch Phoebe and has confronted Angel a number of times with a sort of "you're still a kid. and yeah, you're a parent, but sometimes it gets to be too much and if you need a break then call me" talk. Abby obviously housed him for a short period of time and he loves her. She really was non judgemental about his scars and very willing to help with Phoebe as well and she was sort of the first person that gave Angel a stable home in years even though it was just letting him live at her house for the summer. And Bee he just fucking loves more than life itself. He does talk to her and he is very honest with her. But also plenty of their appointments consist of Angel taking a much needed nap on her couch while Phoebe either naps with him on his chest or Bee entertains Phoebe (if no one else was available to watch her). And I'm cutting myself off here because this was never supposed to get this long

[absolutebl]

This Week in BL

June 2023 Wk 2

Being a highly subjective assessment of one tiny corner of the interwebs. Organized by which ones (in each category) I’m enjoying most.

Ongoing Series - Thai

Step By Step (Tues WeTV & Gaga) ep 7 of 10 - I really adore the family/household dynamics in this show. All the relationships between siblings are so well executed. All the tension and sub text and covert glances in the first “modeling” sequence was so good. I really want to watch the BL within this BL. Bruce is THE BEST. Jeng shutting down everyone with a cool few words is genius (especially given the curt sharp flat way he speaks Thai). Why does nobody have parasols or sun hats or sunshades or sunglasses or anything? I’m actually not mad about seeing an attempted reunion with the ex, bc we are getting to see both that (and how) they once were good together, and also the cracks that drove them apart (and will not allow them to ultimately be together a 2nd time around). I do feel sorry for Jeng, he moved too slowly and lost the 1st round. The captions were not good in the trunk seen, but trust me it was totally hilarious. 

La Pluie (Sat iQIYI) ep 7 of 10 - I finally figured out why I am so tense around this show. In openly taking to task and challenging the soulmates trope, this narrative is telling viewers not to trust it’s core trope - which means we cannot trust the main couple to end happily, nor can we trust those characters who believe most strongly in fated mates (Pat & Mai). This means I, personally, not only can’t rely on an HEA but (as someone who also does not believe in soulmates) I am not entirely sure I even WANT an HEA. This has NEVER happened to me before. It makes me uncomfortable because that’s a core part of my identify with these shows. I mean, good job La Pluie, but also.... huh. Back to this ep: Uh oh. The crush is obvious and the soulmate knows what’s up now. The sex scene twist was v interesting, v gay, and v unusual in a BL. Unfortunately it’s still a BL so the faen fatal just HAD to appear. Will there ever be one out of Thailand where this trope doesn’t show up? Next week is the tried & true uke damsels off into the woods alone. Sigh. 

Our Skyy 2 (Bad Buddy & 1k*) eps 12-16fin - Jimmy, baby, why so hot in an engineering smock? Please have mercy. Aw, Marc is back in yet ANOTHER BL. Definitely the current record holder for most BLs at any one time. (His filming schedule must’ve been insane at the beginning of this year!) PatPran are still great, and their eps this had me hooting with laughter (startling the cat). I forgot how much I enjoyed this show and cast. (Ohm looks great with longer hair, but also he’s lost a lot of weight. I hope he’s OK.) OhmNanon give pitch perfect LTR energy. Throwing EarthMix into the, erm, mix is fun if awkward. NO SINGING. 2 damsels in the forest! Also PatPran = geniuses at mock fighting. So much flirting. It was all quite adorbs. But me-thinks Chief & Tian have been eating moonlight chicken. Full review below. 

Be My Favorite (Fri YouTube) ep 3 of 10? - was enjoying it up until the last bit, why so digusted by smooches? Bad GMMTV no green tea for you. Trash watch here! Rollercoaster about to go DOWWNNNN. 

Luminous Solution (Sat Gaga) ep 3 of 6 - I still only like the high school characters + Dome (WHY so gorgeous?). Is he a magical spirit too? Also, the subs were well off kilter. 

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

Our Dining Table AKA Bokura no Shokutaku (Japan Thurs Gaga) ep 10 fin - God they’re so cute. This show used the manga as a storyboard, so I knew the “crisis of faith over possibility of loss” would happen. Still in live action this felt tonally off. While understandable given Yutaka’s character, and ultimately particularly important for the dad and a relationship with the family, I don’t know we needed it in this BL. The book does have a better ending second scene, but it wouldn’t be possible to do it on screen easily. Ultimately, this show had a simple, touching, quiet end to it. That’s very like the show as a whole. I did love it - it’s been top of my list all along. Full review after the special airs. 

Love Tractor (Korea Weds iQIYI) eps 1-2 of 8 - I LOVE IT SO MUCH. IT IS EVERYTHING. SHUT UP I AM FERRIL FOR THE BEAUTIFUL CITY BOY AND THE YOUNG FARMER. Come on. Korea. SRS? Plus some language play? I just go die now. 

Star Struck (Korea iQIYI & Gaga) ep 7-8 fin - Man this was a difficult show for me. I know we’re supposed to identify with HanJoon but I really felt for YooJae. I’ve been in his position more often than I care to count, and it’s terrible to lose a friend because they caught feelings and you did not. It’s an awful thing to hold a friendship hostage on condition of a romantic relationship. Especially if the other person is not sexually interested in you! All that said, the boyfriend ep was okay. Not sure I believed in this relationship, but it was cute enough. The final ep was (how do I put this?) a loser. We spent a lot of time with terrible home lives and then a semi happy for now final scene? Whatever. Full review below. 

Vian the series (Vietnam YouTube ) ep 6 of 12 - somehow I keep missing this one, I’ll catch it next week. 

Naked Dinner AKA Zenra Meshi (Japan Fri Gaga) ep 9 of 12 - I think the Taiwanese boss is my favorite character. Japan rarely (if ever ) trots out the faen fatal trope. I mean I named it with a Thai word for a reason, it’s not from origin yaoi at all. Yet still there she is. Sigh. This show. 

Stupid Genius (Vietnam Fri YouTube) ep 1 of 6 - RL Studio (Stupid Boys Stupid Love) bringing us yet another high school set VBL. It’s actually not bad. I see a lot of common faces whom I’ve enjoyed in past VBLs. 

It’s Airing But ...

House of Stars (Thai Mon iQIYI) 12 eps - I bounced at ep 3. Will binge if told it is worth it at end.

Stay (Pinoy YouTube) 7 eps - It’s mostly in English and set in LA so I’m not bothering but the first one did drop.

Ever After (Pinoy ????) - I got nothing. 

Takumi-kun Series 6: Nagai Nagai Monogatari no Hajimari no Asa (Japan Sun ????) 10 eps - NO ONE ASKED FOR THIS and no, I have no idea where to get it, why would I? (Say it with me everyone: Oh Japan, must you?*)

Boys Love Omegaverse (Japan ????) - honestly tho? Who tf cares? You’ll still tell me if you find it, because inquiring minds... Irony of this airing at the same time as Takumi-kun. Full circle much, Japan? 

Tin Tem Jai Special (Thai ????) - honestly I checked Gaga & iQiyi in my territory (craptastic hotel) and neither had it listed so I quickly gave up. I mean OF COURSE I WOULD LIKE TO SEE Lee Long Shi in a bathtub, who wouldn’t? But... 

Just because I didn’t watch the special doesn’t mean I can’t gank Lee Long Shi wearing nothing but soap bubbles for you. 

I’m not a monster. 

Ended This Week 

Our Skyy 2 final 4 eps thoughts: This was an interesting combination, and don’t get me wrong I very much enjoyed it, but it felt like the story was carried by PatPran’s characters while the setting and narrative followed an ATOTS arc - ultimately disjointed. OhmNanon are so bold and vibrant they’re too stark a tonal contrast to EarthMix’s more refined and elegant approach, so for me the screen presences and the style of story clashed. It was like a bouquet made up of tulips & roses: they are both flowers and they’re both pretty, but I feel like they actually belong in different vases. Still, enjoyable. And I got a crying kiss. Always makes me happy. Definitely the best of this bunch, and probably the best Our Skyy (and I genuinely loved both the NLMG historical installment and SOTUS.) 8/10 

Star Struck. A friends to lovers story that felt more friends to tolerant yet disinterested partner. It was more about challenges with parents and class strife. I would’ve been disappointed if the show hadn’t come out of nowhere so I had no expectations. But as KBLs go, don’t bother. 6/10 

Next Week Looks Like This:

Starting:

6/15 Tokyo in April AKA Shigatsu no Tokyo wa (Japan Gaga) 8 eps - Based on a yaoi, this is a reunion romance that takes place in an office. Japan does Our Dating Sim? Yes please.

Still Coming - June 2023

6/22 About Us but Not About Us (Pinoy movie from 2022 on Prime) - A professor grieving the loss of his partner meets an ambitious literature student.

6/24 Why You (Khmer BL ????) - Billed as a horror romance, not sure if this is a movie or a series where it will air... nothing except that it exists.

6/24 Tie The Knot AKA Under the Same Sky (Pinoy movie on Prime) Trailer - I guess Prime is coming for our Pinoy BL? From OXIN Films (Rainbow Prince), announced for 2022 based on a true story, Briggs's family runs a bridal business but he has never had a chance to fall in love until he meets Shao, a groom to be.

6/25 Dinosaur Love (Thai iQIYI) Trailer 5 eps - from Ultimate Troop about a uni student, Rak, whose partner cheats on him with Rak's best friend. This gives bad boy hazer Dino an opportunity to hit on Rak at last. From The Yearbook people so I will not watch this as it airs. After Remember Me? Never again with them.

2023 forthcoming BL master post (see comments, some are inaccurate, NOT KEPT UPDATED)

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS

Bruce is so damn fantastic in this show.

Consent comes in all different forms. (both Step by Step) 

Fight fight fight!

Sex sex sex blow job! (both La Pluie) 

Smartest boy in the show. 

Not enough InkPa... never enough. Never never never! 

Love the suit.

All from the Our Skyy 2 BB + ATOTS cross over. 

(last week)

Current Kpop earworm? IVE’s I Am

[silviakundera]

Ok, upon request my thoughts on Bad Buddy, a good queer romance drama that doesn't get much if any international exposure outside the circle of Thai BL fans. Full spoilers.

after consuming literally dozens of BB videos, the best trailer to the drama imo is actually the talented samyvids' "Just My Type" songvid. Perfectly captures the setup.

* the hook: 2 boys raised by their feuding families to be rivals end up attending a university that has a childish Jets vs Sharksesque historic rivalry between the science/engineering vs artistic/architecture majors. Despite these 2 barriers, the boys stumble into a secret bromance and then into love. Secondary couple here is f/f, though it's basically just soft girls meet cute then getting together (no conflict).

* Comedic and light-hearted drama that doesn't take itself too seriously, while also swerving into the appropriate amount of angst for its set up.

* This '20-something bros in love' dynamic reminds me vividly of what a lot of SPN J2 RPF and Hockey RPF has tried to capture. The 2 leads feel like your prototypical good natured university bros and falling in love never changes that. Friends AND Lovers is a challenging dynamic to capture imo but Bad Buddy succeeds

* It helps the Bros In Love vibes that the actors look less primped & polished than many other asian BL productions. They seem like guys you could have actually had in your classes in uni.

* If you welcome the drama's tone and just vibe with it, I think it successfully executes 4 popular romance tropes:

- rivals to friends to lovers

- forbidden (hidden) love

- fall first vs fall harder

- golden retriever bounding around paw cleaning cat

* If you are going to sell me on a modern day romeo & juliet esque queer rom-com, without the bloodshed, then you BETTER put your money where you mouth is and make their love actually forbidden.

* Thankfully, Bad Buddy understood the assignment. It's not just a misunderstanding. Their parents truly do have a feud and they truly are forbidden to even be friends, forget a romantic relationship. 2 kids obligated to be enemies since birth, bound by this twisted shared experience that no one else understands.

* Pran falling first, with enough time to comprehend how cruelly impossible they are. Pat falling late, fast, and hard - too impulsive to consider the consequences and wearing his heart on his sleeve.

* Both characters won me over quickly:  cautious & restrained Pran who likes order, chaotic Pat who craves his attention

* Love that the dramatic tension & hiding in all the early episodes isn't revealed to be pointless. If there was no consequence, then it removes the poignancy of its classic rooftop kiss scene. Prans' fears must be justified in order for the angst to stand up in a rewatch. Pran's friends DO reject him at first. Their parents DO refuse to accept the relationship, including his mom considering this a personal betrayal.

* Prans' fears are painfully rational and everything he is scared of does have to be confronted. But that also gives romantic weight to his decision to give in to the feelings and accept the consequences.

* In the way that scifi authors will try to explore sociopolitical topics through allusions & metaphor, and that Hunger Games author keeps writing dystopian YA whenever she gets heated about politics, Bad Buddy does a good job imo of using the feuding families setup to address the reality of existing in a homophobic and transphobic society while being queer -- demonstrating it in a way that straight cis people can relate to. And approaching from this angle allows the production to tell that story with a certain emotional distance for queer viewers who have experienced such struggles.

* The bittersweet ending sells me completely on this drama. Closeted but not. Open but not entirely. Accepting that you can't change the world and make all your family & friends & coworkers accept your truth... but refusing to abandon them OR your truth. It's a decision so many queer people have made over the years, in different countries and decades. And it's tinged with hope.

* Let's acknowledge that indeed there is tons of product placement in this series. Sometimes to hilarious ends. But frankly, without this sponsorship the series would not exist. So I'm very grateful to suffer through the marketing that helped fund it.

* Available streaming in multiple places, including YouTube.

[inspector-montoya-fox]

I want to rewrite/ share my thoughts on this post because honestly what the fuck did I know at the age of 20? The title was a bit overdramatic, I wouldn't go so far as to brand the series misogynistic per se, but admittedly some of its less progressive moments reserved for the female characters really have me questioning if Sucker Punch had their best interest in mind. There are only 7 of them: Carmelita, Penelope, Neyla, Mz Ruby, the Contessa, Henriette, and if we're being extremely generous, Jing King. Also worth noting that out of the 65 guards only 3 are female. That's what I call equal opportunity! I think the main argument lies in whether or not the girlboss moments outweigh the... not very girlboss moments.

Carmelita's development, not only as a character but as a woman, throughout the series is the primary point of discussion here. In Sly 1, she's mainly seen as a foil to Sly's plans, which attaches her to 3 kinda harmful notions. Firstly, the 'woman who has no chill is out to spoil the boys' fun' trope. Secondly, the fact that a high ranking Interpol officer is unable to put 2 + 2 together and see the bigger picture while chasing Sly, who is desperately trying to show her that he's not the mastermind behind the Mesa City casino or the firework factory or the evil volcano lair. It makes it seem like she's not good at her job and lowkey stupid. Thirdly, her appearances are opportunities for Sly to flirt with her. Kind of a thin line here between developing their relationship and Carmelita 100% not reciprocating the flirt. The dynamic being presented is 'goofy guy has crush on serious boss lady' but if we're being a bit realistic, it can also be received as Sly not taking this female law officer seriously.

In Sly 2 and 3, her role transgresses these stereotypes because she's given more depth: her professional relationship with Neyla, her downfall and her conversation with Sly in the helicopter all transform her into a multifaceted character. That last one also shows that, even though she wasn't reciprocating the flirting in Sly 1, she enjoys Sly's company and wants to be with him too. And when she becomes playable in Sly 3, the idea that she's the most powerful character in the series is fully realised. Her move set - mega jump and shock pistol - as well as the fact that her segments are reserved for the bigger threats serve to prove that she is the ultimate force to be reckoned with.

Penelope suffers from having the opposite trajectory. Flight of Fancy and its display of gender commentary is such a strong start for her character but all of that is immediately thrown into the garbage for the sake of turning her into yet another love interest. She's better at hacking than Bentley and can fistfight on a moving plane but instead of allowing her to be one of the boys, she's reduced to Bentley's crush and made a hostage twice. I think this is why it took me so long to understand her character. Because there's this really abrupt switch after her introduction which dilutes all her best parts, mainly how she's a tomboy who couldn't give less of a fuck.

When I was re-reading that original post, I was thinking that maybe I was a bit harsh but then realised the main point I had failed to convey was that... well, there's no nice way to put this but, the series is a product of the male gaze, exclusively. Yes. The protagonist is narrating his own story alongside his two buddies, so the entire world of Sly Cooper, as we know it, revolves around his own understanding of everything, including his perception of women. There is a lot of flirting and a lot of damsel in distress-ing, and these reflect on Sly's character. With the exception of Henriette, all the female characters are treated to either of the two, if not both: the main trio (Carmelita, Penelope & Neyla) are pigeonholed into the role of love interests, the former two also needing to be rescued, whereas Mz Ruby and the Contessa are met with flirty chit-chat from Sly (and I don't want to hear any bullshit that this is not the case again. If Sly handles the female villains with a more suave, teasing attitude as opposed to their male counterparts, guess what that means). And then there's the case of A Cold Alliance, which yay! anti-arranged marriage rhetoric and female empowerment by having the gang absolutely destroy Tsao, a total misogynist scum of the planet. Surely this harrowing experience must've had dire consequences on Jing King... oh wait. Sorry I forgot that Tsao's victim, the character whose rescue mission is the central plot of the entire episode, is not given a face and speaks only 2 lines of dialogue in favour of the pain her father has to go through... Isn't this kinda counterproductive?

I feel like, in closing, I have to reiterate that I don't think the series is misogynistic. Let's make that clear. I just think it's a bit 'one step forwards, two steps back' because its brand of feminism as well as its depiction of femininity are similar to the one in Marvel movies or Katy Perry's 'Woman's World'. Birthed by the male gaze, basically. A woman doesn't have to mega-jump and have a shock pistol to be a "girlboss", however. And, even though the majority of female characters are depicted to have established careers, it doesn't help that they have to have their gender brought up in some capacity. Anyway, I was going to close off by asking you to imagine a game where the developers have Carmelita wear a miniskirt but fuck that. Power to women.

[antiv3nom]

Bedman (Romeo)

omg havent had an excuse to talk abt bedman in a hot minute thank u anon...

favorite thing about them:

i love the tragedy of his story arc... that feels like a weird thing to say but its the first thing that came to mind! just. look. the road to hell paved with good intentions bit taken to the extreme really works here!!! the idea that he remembered the name of every person he ever killed because he was under the impression he could bring them all back, only to have the rug pulled from under him? hurts me! in the best way!!!

other than that i do enjoy his design, both romeo himself and the bed :] i wanna give my bedman cosplay another try sometime for sure, it didnt work out for various reasons but i have most of the components and would enjoy cosplaying him fr in the future

least favorite thing about them:

i think i dont really dislike anything about the way bedman is written in the source material strongly enough to point it out here? i think my main gripe is the way the fandom treats him to either extreme, like theres "bedman did nothing wrong ever" people and "bedman is horrific" people and i wish both camps would chill out and recognize hes like. a complex character? but i do think most people do this already which i can appreciate

favorite line:

im a little obsessed w his win line against may in xrd

"I do not understand humans who are motivated by love. A person is born, lives for a number of years, and interacts with up to eight billion people. What proof is there of something they can't even define?"

bc like. buddy. you dont even realize it. YOURE driven by love. all this shit wasnt just for yourself but it was for delilah too!!! fuck!!! you dont even see it as love you see it as necessary because shes that important to you!!! and dont even get me STARTED on the bed in strive and how its still running because of his last minute code additions which almost act as the last part of his will to protect delilah. GAHHHH

brOTP:

BEDMAN AND AXL INTERACTIONS. PLEASE. PLEASE. their dynamic is so interesting as characters with such fascinating ways of interacting with the world...gah. GAH. and no one fucking talks about it!!!

OTP:

sinbed. must i wlabo.

ok but i will, im not as into them as i was like a year ago but i still do really enjoy their dynamic. sin being such a beacon of hope and being so willing to see people as good contrasted with a post-xrd living bedman (bc all my sinbed stuff exists within au but im having fun out here so sue me) seeing himself as inherently evil due to his actions despite his intentions and believing no one would ever care for him? it hits for me

nOTP:

i dont know of anything off the top of my head that ive seen for him??? nothing prevalent at least.

actually on second thought i think ive seen like one instance of bedman and ram in a romantic sense, and that im not a fan of but i guess i could see the appeal, just not my thing

random headcanon:

this motherfucker would have gotten heated in some internet forums or wiki talk pages, DEDICATED to accuracy out here and he WILL fight you about it

unpopular opinion:

not entirely certain i have one? i think the "bedman while flawed is not actually a terrible person and was doing his best given his extremely fucked up circumstances" is a pretty cool take by this point for most people

i think the only thing i have is that my interpretation of bedman has always been as like a young adult rather than a kid but like i dont really have a concrete opinion on that and i totally understand people who do see him as a kid like its entirely understandable to do so

song i associate with them:

other than his character themes, its GOTTA be dramaturgy by eve, which just. it gives the vibes. read the english lyrics it will make sense i prommy

favorite image of them:

THE EEPER...

OTHER than this one its more an animation but his 6p in xrd is so silly i love it so bad...and for a more serious option his instant kill is really cool