#it started well but then it went downhill
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iamgonnagetyouback · 2 days ago
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𝐡𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐈𝐯𝐲 𝐝𝐚𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠! 𝐈𝐦 𝐛𝐚𝐚𝐚𝐚𝐜𝐤. '𝐡𝐞𝐡𝐞' . 𝐚𝐧𝐲𝐰𝐚𝐲𝐬 𝐈 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐰𝐨𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐝𝐨 𝐚 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐬𝐭 𝐛𝐢𝐭𝐞. 𝐏𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐭 𝐧𝐮𝐦𝐛𝐞𝐫 𝐬𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐞𝐞 𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐤𝐬 𝐬𝐨 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐥! 𝐋𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲. 𝐈 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐟𝐞𝐫 𝐢𝐭 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐦𝐲 '𝐝𝐞𝐚𝐫 𝐍𝐨𝐭𝐭 𝐛𝐞𝐚𝐫' 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐈'𝐯𝐞 𝐚𝐥𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐲 𝐫𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐨𝐧 𝐡𝐢𝐦. 𝐂𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐤𝐞𝐞𝐞𝐩 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐛𝐮𝐬𝐲 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐭 𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐈? 𝐒𝐨𝐨𝐨𝐨 𝐈'𝐯𝐞 𝐝𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐝 𝐨𝐧 𝐫𝐞𝐦𝐮𝐬 𝐥𝐮𝐩𝐢𝐧. 𝐀𝐧 𝐨𝐥𝐝 𝐟𝐚𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐝 𝐜𝐥𝐚𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐜. 𝐀𝐥𝐬𝐨 𝐡𝐚𝐯 𝐢 𝐚𝐬𝐤𝐞𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐛𝐢𝐫𝐭𝐡𝐝𝐚𝐲 𝐰𝐚𝐬??
(˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶) 𝐋𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐣𝐨𝐲 (𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭𝐬 𝐦𝐞)
(𝐈𝐦 𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐚𝐜𝐞 𝐢𝐬 𝐚𝐬 𝐜𝐮𝐭𝐞 𝐚𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮ᯓᡣ𐭩)
Hello there, Joy darling! (˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶) You always make me smile with your messages! And yes, prompt seventy-three is absolutely one of my favorites—And I think I just wrote one of my favourite fics ever! (⸝⸝> ᴗ•⸝⸝)
Oh, and my birthday is July 27! What about you?
Love you tons, Joy! (っ˘ω˘ς )
ivy's 1k celebration ❄️ navigation ❄️ prompt list
ˋ°•*⁀➷ REMUS LUPIN #73: "Are you flirting with me?" "Depends. Is it working?"
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Remus Lupin was in agony. Not the type of agony he was accustomed to, like the pains of a full moon or the usual pressure of acing his exams. This was a new, entirely different agony: figuring out how to flirt with you.
It had all started when he confessed his crush on you to Sirius, James, and Peter, which led to an onslaught of unhelpful advice. Sirius was convinced that pickup lines were the way to go, James insisted that light teasing would do the trick, and Peter’s advice was to "just be yourself." Remus found himself highly skeptical of Peter’s guidance, mumbling, “Just be myself? What kind of garbage advice is that?”
So, there he was, awkwardly lurking around the corner where he knew you would be coming down the hall soon. He had decided to try Sirius’ suggestion, even though his heart pounded like it was threatening to escape his chest. He kept mentally repeating, You’ve got this. You’re smooth. You’re cool. You can do this. But his palms were already clammy, and he wasn’t even facing you yet.
When you finally walked around the corner, Remus’ plan went immediately downhill. He tried to lean against the wall casually but instead slipped a bit and had to grab at his glasses to keep them from sliding off. But it was too late — his glasses were now adorably crooked, and he was slightly off-balance. He barely managed to pull himself together, clearing his throat to deliver what he thought would be a confident line.
“Uh… are you from, uh, from heaven?” he stammered. "Because you, um, you—well, you don’t look like you’ve fallen, but, er, maybe like you tripped into my heart?"
You raised an eyebrow, trying to hide your laughter. He was so obviously nervous, yet so endearingly genuine, that you couldn’t help the smile spreading across your face.
"Remus," you chuckled, leaning in just a little, "are you flirting with me?"
Remus’ face turned an impressive shade of red, and he shifted uncomfortably, his gaze darting around as if searching for an escape route. He adjusted his crooked glasses, looking like he was about to combust from embarrassment. Finally, he gave you a lopsided, slightly panicked smile, mumbling, “Depends… Is it working?”
At that, you couldn’t hold back your laughter, and the sound made Remus feel like he might actually survive this mortifying encounter. Your laughter was sweet, genuine, and somehow managed to make him feel as if he’d accomplished something.
“Honestly?” you grinned, giving him a playful nudge. “It’s the most charming thing I’ve seen all day.”
Remus’ face lit up with a shy, delighted smile, and he gave a soft laugh, finally relaxing a little. “So… no more pickup lines, then?”
“Maybe just stick with being yourself,” you teased, making his heart skip a beat as you walked off, leaving him with a dreamy grin and the distinct realization that, maybe, Peter’s advice wasn’t so garbage after all.
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beef-brisket · 2 days ago
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Lucifer couldn't breathe. He only stared ahead. This couldn't be true. Was he really gone? Was it fucked up that Lucifer missed him? Missed Adam?
He breathed out and panted, trying to catch his breathe. He was alone. Both Adam's were gone. His daughter was gone. In the end, it was always Lucifer who ended up alone.
Lucifer slowly made his way to the balcony and looked over Pride. He could hear the screams from the sinners and some hellborn.
Did he forgive himself? Could he? Well, he had to. Or "Adam" would be back.
The sinners were the bane of Lucifer's existence. He's always thought of them as scum. They didn't understand the true meaning of free will. Not the way Lucifer understood it. How the first three- two humans understood it.
The apple. The start of it all. Where everything went downhill. But Lucifer didn't regret it. Even after everything he still felt confident in his decision.
He just wishes he didn't hide away from Adam. He wished he held on tightly and pulled him alone with Lilith. She would have been mad, but that doesn't matter now.
He should have spent more time with him.
He should have been sweet to Adam. He was always the kindest, gentiles creatures in Eden.
He should have trusted him. I do not believe Lilith's lies.
He's done so many wrongs to Adam, and he was sure there was pain there that Lucifer had no idea about.
But he has his Adam back. His Adam from Eden. He can help him grow to be the man he was meant to be
Not the man pain amd anger turned him into.
He'll make things right. He'll do it for Hell. For his daughter. For Adam. And for himself.
Does he forgive himself? Not yet. But he will. He swears by that.
In Your Head
Lucifer sighed as he held the guitar that he took from the battlefield. It was Adams guitar and aside from a few scratches it looked like it was in perfect condition.
Lucifer: I'm going to miss you old friend.
Though, was friend the right word? Adam was so much more than a friend to Lucifer.
Watching him get stabbed like that had been very hard.
Was it though?
Lucifer snapped his head up, eyes wide as he looked at the angel he thought to be long dead, his helmet gone and golden blood staining his robe.
Lucifer: A-Adam? What, how are you here!?
Adam smiled at him and it was too sweet for the Adam of today the one that he turned into. But not the Adam he knew in Eden.
Adam: Oh come on Luci, you're smarter than that. No one comes back from an angelic blade to the heart. Thanks for that by the way.
That nickname sliced through his core, he hadn't heard it in so long he almost forgot that's what Adam used to call him.
Lucifer: You're not real are you?
Adam: Bingo baby! Awww, it's actually sweet. You miss me so much that I actually take up space in that head of yours.
Lucifer: Why are you so..... Nice? But look like that?
Adam shrugged and moved to sit down beside him: Probably because you don't really remember what I looked like in Eden, but more how I acted. So you just kinda...... Married the past with the present. I don't know boo, it's your mind.
Lucifer felt Adam touch his hair as if to tuck it behind his ear, but since he wasn't real the hand just went right through him.
Lucifer: I don't get it, you weren't like this in Eden.
Adam: Maybe I'm a version you've always wanted.
That made sense in a way.
Lucifer: Why would I want a polite slightly flirty version of you?
Adam smiled gently and leaned in: Come on Luci, you know why. Stop lying to yourself.~
His breath hitched in his throat, sure he had always thought about what could have been between them but...... It was always just a fantasy.
Adam: A fantasy you could have made real.~
Lucifer: You didn't want me.
Adam: How would you know? You never asked or tried. You could have had me all to yourself.
Lucifer: I could have?
Adam: Yeah. But now you never will.
@fanofstuff01 @beef-brisket
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epitaph-of-rebirth · 17 hours ago
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now that act 1 dropped and we survived the caitvi divorce I have new theories of stuff regarding their reunion again on act2/act3 based on the teasers and what we know from season 1.
And guys I think things will get worst first before getting good so here is my theory of what will happen on act 2 based on the teasers for it:
First I really believe that Jinx will be the one to save Vi from her endless suffering drinking all day and night and fighting. She is secret following Vi on the teaser scenes so makes sense that when Vi finally hits rock bottom: Jinx will be the one to catch her.
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Now probably what will make Jinx and Vi bond again and be able to be sisters like in act 1 from S1, probably will be their fight against Warwick:
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From the red background we can imagine that they both are fighting him at the same time:
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And we know that Warwick is Vander since this was revelead on the end of last season, if they both get to know this in some way while fighting him, we can expect a very emotional bonding between Jinx and Vi and probably have Vi and Jinx forgiving each other for their mistakes and getting their sistership back much more stronger.
So what this also means for the CaitVi reunion? well not so nice news.
Caitlyn probably is stil hunting Jinx, she will be even more deep on her rage and grief and probably isolated thanks to it. And totally manipulated by Ambess so my guess is that she will eventualy find Jinx and by proxy also meet Vi.
This Probably will be on this battle show on the act 2 teaser again, that we can see Jinx fighing that Noxian soldier who is always with Ambessa:
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I imagine their reunion be maybe a paralel to Jinx and Vi first reunion where they meet and a fight starts imediatly. But this time Vi will willing choose Jinx, not only because Caitlyn hurt her, but because now Jinx is family again and Vi motto is what Vander told her: "protect the family"
And guys I'm a little excited for this confrontation, because for the first time, Caitlyn will have to face a angry, very protective and even mentally stronger Vi. Because after hiting rock bottom and finding herself again thanks to Jinx. I really imagine that Vi won't hesitate to put herself between Caitlyn and Jinx to protect her sister no matter what Caitlyn says.
My theory got a little stronger thanks to a very know interaction between Vi and Caitlyn on the league of legends game when they're in opposite teams, Caitlyn says: " I never imagine we would be on opposite sides again", we know that Arcane is prequel to LoL lore so this confirms that in some moment, Vi had to fight Caitlyn in the past, and probably will be protecting Jinx.
I really have no idea WHAT will make Caitlyn wake up and start her redemption arc, but the first thing to the ignite it in case all this happens I think will be having to fight Vi, and in such case: lose and again Jinx get free from her hands.
Also I expect a very emotional confrontation since in the first act was clearly the only person able to make Cait vulnerable until everything went downhill on episode 3 was Vi. And I don't think Caitlyn will be mentally good on this fight, Vi was always show as the thing that makes her hesitate and having to shoot Vi with the intention of actually hurt her and not by missing like was on episode 3. Probably will bring the question: "what are you shooting for?" in her mind.
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asraindarkness · 1 day ago
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vent time! i have to disrespectfully disagree with people who are now suddenly saying "it was clear from the start that bucktommy was just a short-term thing". the whole issue with the argument is this: 911 has never been the best written show, and especially everything after s4 has been capital R Rough. this is no succession, the bear, arcane. you know, tv shows that have incredibly story continuity, character writing, and pacing. people say that bucktommy was not written "well enough" as if that is a valid sign in the 911 universe that the breakup was a sure thing. i call bullshit. when was the last time that the show has wrapped up even the simplest storyline in a satisfying and serious way? when was the last time character development happened and was take seriously? when was the last time the main characters didn't feel stagnant and the stories didn't feel repetitive? when was the last time the show didn't go in circles and choose the easy or sometimes most offensive way out? 911 had enough meat to tell compelling stories for 3 seasons, afterwards it went noticibly downhill. people who say that the "bad writing" of bucktommy should have been a clear sign are talking complete nonsense imo. tommy was the first ever love interest who checked all the boxes, who got verbal approval of bobby (who has watched buck grow and knows him incredibly well and who did notice a positive difference in buck!), who had everything that we have been told buck needs in a partner for 6 seasons. the canon text spelled out: this could be the one.
we were not delusional for that because, once again, i have to point out: the wonky writing is not a bucktommy problem. it has been and still is a general 911 problem. if they butcheted the bucktommy writing while they did great with everything else, yes, then i would agree the signs were there. for 911 standards of writing, which are very low in comparison to good tv shows, bucktommy has actually been done pretty damn great until that fucked up breakup. people say "they didn't even know each other after 6 months" and i retort "athena first admitted that she had a fiance before michael to michael and bobby like 30 years (?) after the fact". this show has been fucking up storylines left and right for years, and most characters and dynamics had many moments that were terribly written and poorly handled and were only enjoyable when you ignored the idiocy of it all. this show doesn't care about timelines, doesn't care about logic, doesn't care to base the drama within the constraints of a realistic depiction of society and laws. it retcons things for shits and giggles. the mains only get through it all thanks to plot convenience and plot armor. like please. we try to find logical solutions (e.g. tommy lands the plane) and the show will choose whatever is the most ridiculous idea (12 yo lands it).
looking at the bigger picuture, bucktommy had incredible potential for 911 standards and could have easily worked long-term if only the writers wanted to do so. the simple problem is: they apparently don't want to put any more work into it. it is as easy as that. many things in this show never lived up to their full potential and got wrapped up in the most ridiculous ways that nobody could have ever predicted. like, my bad for expecting some leftover common sensen and logic in the weewoo show! at this point, it feels like a skit starring clowns that will do the most random shit. rinse and repeat.
in that context and thinking back to all the butchered storylines, bucktommy had actually been a fucking masterpiece so far. now, it unfortunately just joins a looong row of things that could have been impactful and meaningful if only the show had good storytelling.
how could i have ever knew a breakup is coming when the writing literally said i wrote them for 8.05 as an stablished couple who where doing ok just so the breakup could hurt more!!! hurt who??? cuz most of their fandom were queers, so there is that.
and yes i agree with you. i dropped the show after s6 and came back to it ONLY bcz my friend told me buck came out bi and start this season only bcz i was invested in buck and his relationship journey cuz i knew for a fact the other part of this show is not gonna get any better and the fucked that up to.
they only claim they KNEW they’re gonna break up cuz they were saying it since 7.06 lol
and it piss me off when they say there was no chemistry (which i disagree) cuz this is so stupid. lacking chemistry is something WE see as audiences it is not a thing for characters in the story, they don’t see it and they don’t feel it so it can not be a reason for them to breakup, like??????
all and all bddie shippers has been dancing this dance for 7 years now and yk what? i hope they do get what they want cuz 911 is not gonna change the writing so i hope they do get bddie in this exact writing they seem to loooove cuz i know it’s not gonna be all fair dust and unicorns lol
(i still love buck and i hope hope hope they handle his sexuality better at least from now on but im not optimistic)
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haveihitanerve · 1 month ago
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Bruce accidentally gets shot by Jason and is in critical condition
I read this idea somewhere, so it isn't really mine, but I'd really love to see it written please if you feel comfortable
ohohohohoh!!! this is do delicious i can just ~feel~ the angst... lemme see if i have anything inside that can write this well...
Jason was pissed at Bruce. That, actually, wasn't unusual. Jason was used to living in a perpetual state of pissed off-ness for the man who was had once been his father. What was unusual, however, was the fact that he had still agreed to come on this mission with him, with his Replacement no less.
Jason didn't hate Tim. Anymore. The kid was smart and witty and good, with a sort of spark, a need to be Robin that neither Dick nor Jason had really had. It didn't dilute the sting of the betrayal, but Jason could respect the kid. And was marginally more understanding as to Bruce's reasons for taking him in. Marginally.
But his hatred for Bruce and his only accepting behavior towards Tim did not mean he didn't have their backs. Well, it could've, and at this point Jason wouldn't have put it past Bruce to still take him on a mission without fully trusting Jason to guard his back, but it didn't matter anyway, because Jason had both their backs.
Like now, for instance. Jason cursed as the man opposite Tim pulled a gun. "Fucks sake." Jason reached for his own, previously holstered because he was aware of Bruce's dislike for them and didn't actually want to kill anyone, not while he was on the Bats turf and could get repercussions at least, and aimed.
The gunshot slashed through the air, hard and unforgiving, unflinching. It was why Jason could do nothing but stare in horror as Bruce made his move, diving in front of Tim, willing to take the bullet of the attacker for him, unsuspecting of the bullet flying at him from behind. Tim's eyes were wide in fear. Bruce went down. The goons fled.
Tim dropped to his knees immediately, hands moving, tugging out gadgets and tools from Bruce's belt and his own with a familiarity that made Jason's heart throb. "Help me!" The kid screamed and Jason realized he had been stuck, frozen, watching hollowly as Bruce's blood pooled around him.
"Please." Tim gasped, and Jason hesitated as tears streamed down Tim's throat, hands shaking as he tried to apply pressure and staunch the flow of blood. It wouldn't be enough. The bullet had flown through his shoulder, a clean hit, at least, but it had hit too many main blood vessels. If they didn't move fast....
Jason dropped down beside him, tying quick knots and connected his comm line. "Oracle! Come in." "Hood. What do you need?" Babs voice was detached, but not cold. "B's been hit. Please." She didn't answer, but Nightwing appeared only a moment later, eyes cold with a hatred and fear Jason had never seen before.
They whisked him to the manor, and it was more autopilot than invitation that Jason followed, the hollowness inside him turning numb as Alfred paled at the sight of the wound, Leslie already having been called. "Its critical." The doctor revealed, grim, but she finished her work, and promised to return in the morning.
Alfred watched over Bruce, hovering, periodically cleaning and changing his bandages. No one bothered to tell him it was unnecessary. "What happened." Dick growled when Bruce was finally taken care of, the only other sound filling the cave the beeping of his heart monitor.
"He took a bullet for me." Tim answered, and bile built in Jason's mouth at the shakiness of his voice. Because if he hadn't fired, Bruce truly would've taken a bullet for him. But... if he hadn't fired then Bruce wouldn't have taken his bullet, just the other guys but... his mind was too frazzled.
Dick seemed to calm a little at the explanation, and Jason waited, tense, for Tim to reveal it was Jason's bullet he had taken, but he didn't. Just followed Dick silently over to Bruce's side and squeezed his hand. "Get better B." Dick whispered, and Jason's heart squeezed as his brothers voice broke.
"Come on," Dick nudged Tim's back, pushing him to the stairs. "It won't help him if you stay awake all night." Jason fought his snort of "hypocrite." Because Bruce would stay up all night. And Dick was guaranteed to come back downstairs the second Tim was in bed and do the same. But, at least he was watching over Tim. The way he had never done for Jason.
They all left, Alfred going to the kitchen to make tea to calm himself, and if Jason had a clearer mind he might've thought a little on it, how they all trusted him. Alone. In the Batcave. With an injured Bruce. But he didn't, so he slouched onto the chair next to Bruce instead, head heavy.
"I'm sorry." He gasped weakly. He didn't know how long he'd been sitting there silently. How long it'd been since he started speaking. "I'm so fucking sorry B. I-I just... I'm wrong, and I'm broken, and we're broken and I just don't- I don't know how to fix it!" He scrubbed his nose, sniffling hard.
"I'm so sorry Bruce. I thought... I thought I was better, I thought- you were right. Guns suck-" His breath trembled and it took every ounce of self control for Jason not to break, not to collapse and sob. Because if Bruce died... It would be his fault. And if Bruce died, he had no doubts Tim would stop his silence for Jason. And if Dick found out the truth... If Bruce died Jason had no doubts in his mind that his son would avenge him. If Bruce died Jason wasn't sure he'd even try to stop it.
"I miss you." He whispered. "I do and it hurts and I hate it, but I just can't stop and why do you have to be so difficult?" Jason let out a shaky sob, pressing his hands to his eyes. "Why can't you ever just let things be fucking easy?" He begged. "Why can't we just go back to being fucking easy?" His voice sounded pitiful to his own ears.
"language." Bruce rasped. "B!" Jason almost toppled the chair with the force with which he leapt forward, grasping the older man's hand. Bruce offered a small, constrained smile. "Hey Jaylad." Jason sobbed, throwing himself on top of his father. "I miss you too." Bruce murmured, and as his arm wrapped around Jason's back, Jason felt a portion of his anger chip away.
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modjisan · 10 months ago
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girl dinner
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ratatatastic · 3 months ago
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lets play sasha charades!! on this episode of mikksy mimes sasha cooking!
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attempts to cook but gets frustrated and throws everything away, ends up ordering takeout and eating that instead 🤣🤣🤣 very proud of his preformance sasha will surely get it in one try it was that good (narrators voice: he did not get it in one try)!!!
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sasha didn't get it must act it out again...oh maybe i should play up the frustration? make more obvious cooking motions like dicing and pan flipping...did he get it now? no...? oh this guy...hes a lot denser than i thought...
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sasha who can only smile after getting help...in the end this punk was making fun of me...
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luosty the only one to clap for oscar worthy preformance because ofc the brat claps when we can make fun of sasha without much consequence he supports mikksy in his public bullying campaign
be careful luosty youll might the next target of sasha wrath 🤣🤣🤣
Sasha Cup Party | 7.31.24 (x)
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brasiliangp · 1 year ago
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Drive to Survive + Realistic Color Palettes
@f1blrcreatorsfest - October: Softs
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ryanatwoodenthusiast · 1 year ago
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i'm here to inform everyone that i firmly believe that chicken girls season 7 is the best piece of media ever created
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whirling-ghost · 7 months ago
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List 5 things that make you happy, then put this in the askbox for the last 10 people who liked or reblogged something from you! Get to know your mutuals and followers 💚
these are so difficult
1. Miss Lola
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2. D&D. is it the story or the companionship? who knows
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3. blue hair. blue hair and pronouns might be a stereotype but I love having it. I just bleached my roots at the weekend so it's a little bit less loved than usual because that shit is a hassle
4. good food. I was going to just go with chocolate but honestly a nice meal is up there
5. bed. it's comfy, it's cosy and I feel safe there.
I'm not tagging anyone but if you see this and you want to join in, consider yourself tagged :)
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rosicheeks · 8 months ago
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Unfortunately relatable. I grew up in the church and have a lot of Christian trauma from that. I show up for special occasions for my parents… sometimes. But it’s uncomfortable from the moment I step through the door. Bigoted pastor, the self-righteousness disguising the prejudice, the political comments from the altar. Shots at young people left right and center as if the hell on earth wasn’t caused by the same older generation 90% of the congregation belongs to..
I miss being young in the choir and the youth groups and not struggling with it. It’s wild to look back at the younger version of me who was unshakeable in his faith and honestly just saddening.
I was texting my sister today about it and she said
“I 100% think ALL of us have a ton of religious trauma and everyone else in the family just doesn’t realize it cause they’re still drinking the kool-aid.”
I ran out of tag room and didn’t want to delete any 😭 seriously not lying I could write a book about all my thoughts and experiences
#I relate to all of this so much#and it’s so sad how many people truly have religious trauma#I still find myself lucky and privileged cause I know there are stories MUCH worse than mine#it’s really hard cause my parents still think I’m a Christian#honestly at this point I have no clue what i am#even if I end up still being a Christian that doesn’t help or heal all of the years of church trauma#but the hard part is still acting the part for my parents#growing up I always tried to fit into the good Christian girl mold#cause I know that’s what my parents wanted and I didn’t want to disappoint them#but once I started smoking weed and they found out? it went all downhill from there#their perfect angel fell from heaven#and I feel like ever since I haven’t been really their daughter…. I’ve just been living on the outside looking in to everything#it hurts looking back at all the years I spent brainwashed into believing that was the ONLY faith#it genuinely makes me sick to my stomach thinking about the fact that I went to a pro life rally#the thing I was talking to my sister about was how mental health was never talked about in the church#when I started dealing with it and went to my parents or the pastors or any adult really and told them what I was dealing with#wanna know what the first thing they would ALWAYS say? well have you prayed about it? the way they treated mental illness was that it was#YOUR fault cause God is punishing you for something…. that you need to pray or go to church so then God will eventually take it away#and the thing is I don’t necessarily blame my parents (which kinda sucks cause I want to blame someone)#but honestly it’s just the environment they grew up in too… like I’m 99% sure my dad has dealt with depression his entire life#but won’t get diagnosed or anything cause they always believe faith has something to do with it#which makes me incredibly sad cause I just think about how much my dad has suffered and how he didn’t need to#^^ I was typing this out when I was late to my family gathering hahaha but then I think my sister called or something so I had to stop#sorry this post is all over the place - I swear I could write a book about religious trauma#yesterday went ok surprisingly but today? TODAY is going to be so much worse#sure I’ll make a post about it later but I guessssss I should go to bed now? it’s 2am and I have to get up at 5:45 🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃#and I have a fuuuuull day of fun Christian festivities while I’m dealing with all of this bottled up and unresolved crap from my past#please don’t get me wrong I love my parents and like I said I don’t blame them - they did their best#it just really sucks wondering what my life would have been like if I didn’t grow up in the church or in a super religious family#I wonder if when I told my parents I was depressed if they would have instantly brought me in to get help
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andyourhostkristenwiig · 8 months ago
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Remember when I was 21, in job training, and had a major crush on the vice mayor aka my 2nd boss who was 12 years older than me?
Well get ready for the sequel where I am 29, in a full-time job in a different town and have a major on crush on the head of my department aka my 1st boss below the mayor, who's 5 years older than me and a friend's cousin.
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donuts4evry1 · 2 years ago
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I drew Aurealis again :) (This time, they are around 24 years old instead of 15). He’s a florist and his favourite flowers are orchids !)
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bootyful-seventeen · 11 months ago
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its wild how indigo gave me my spotify wrapped version on books that i bought this year and it's no surprise manga was a popular genre
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coffeeworldsasaki · 1 year ago
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Finished 대도시의 사랑법!!!!
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mihai-florescu · 1 year ago
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Cant focus to work at school (get distracted by meeting people and socializing), cant work at home (the spectre of procrastination whispers a sweet "wouldn't you like to take a nap? Lay down and see how comfortable a pilow is right now") man. Im starting to think i just cant focus anywhere
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