#it means the world to feel included and i love you so much!!

[agirlwithglam]

🌟 become your dream girl before 2025! 🌟

THIS WILL *ACTUALLY* CHANGE YOUR LIFE.

do you know how many people are waiting until next year to glow up and actually start to become their dream self? now just think, if you started now, before 2025, how far you would be. how much more skills and knowledge you would have. you're literally getting a head start. so what are you doing dilly-dallying until 2025? heres your guide to ending this year accomplishing everything you need to and starting 2025 with everything you need.

in this post i will include mindset shifts, how to become a better person, actionable advice, actually becoming a new person <3

👑know what you want.

who do you want to become at the end of this year? what does your dream girl look like? what kind of body does she have? her clothes? who are the people she hangs out with on a daily basis- friends?

create a very clear version in your head and use pinterest to show photos of what your goals are- for ex: girls at the gym, journalling, writing, studying, reading, learning, walking, with friends, spending time outside, going swimming, playing sports, doing a skill/ hobby.

you can also find an idol/ an inspiration- a youtuber, influencer, parent, anyone who you look up to and want to somewhat have a similar life like them. (for ex: thewizardliz, tam kaur) whatever is important to you this goes hand in hand with the next point:

👑goals.

any unfinished projects, any goals you said you'd do in the beginning of the year, get them all down on paper. if you've finished any of them, great!- tick them off. but if you haven't then its time to lock in. pick the ones that are most important to you. that you know that achieving these will 100% get you closer to your goal. doing this makes sure you get rid of the ones that you think are "productive" when in reality they just help you procrastinate.

finish any unfinished projects or books you have before the new year begins because 2025 is about bringing in new, fresh opportunities and things. for me personally, i have a few crochet projects that i want to finish before the end of this year so i can start the new year with nothing old from the year before!

👑cutting.

you are going to be becoming a new person- new mindset, new values, new perception on life, etc. the people in your life currently probably won't align with this new version of you. because if the people around you still only know the old you, your growth won't happen because it will feel extremely unnatural without the right people around you. this means you're going to have to decide whether you are letting any of your friends go. if they don't serve you or make you feel happier or bring in any value to your life, im sorry but its time to cut them off.

but of course if you actually have good, kind, loving friends who grow with you and support you all the way, keep them. the goal is to remove the people who don't serve your highest self. not remove the people who you know will be there for you.

but along with this, if you notice that those people are acting a bit more weirdly/ strangely now that you're improving- giving you backhanded compliments, talking about you behind your back, or just giving you a weird vibe in general, trust your gut. those people don't want to see you going to a higher place where you're thriving- keeping them in your life can be terrible for your highest good.

remember that doing this doesn't mean that you're not going to get better because BETTER ALWAYS COMES. god will give you more people who you couldn't have ever dreamed could be so amazing. so never keep toxic people in your life out of fear that you'll be alone forever. (remember: 8 billion people in the world.)

👑mindset.

dont wait to change your mindset only once you achieve the dream body or the best grade- start now. people can take away everything from you but they can't take away your mindset, skills, and knowledge. here are some mindset shifts to develop:

the abundance mindset. know that everything happens for your highest and greatest good only! everything will work out in the end for you because God hasn't put you on this earth to suffer. if you are religeous (God) or spiritual (the universe) or even believe theres a higher faith, why on earth would you willingly believe that your purpose here is to have a bad time? obstacles will come your way and you will make bad decisions and mistakes. but all these jsut contribute to the person you are today and the person who you'll be in the future!

i will make it. believe in your vision and yourself so fiercely that you know in your bones that you will achieve your goals. you will travel the world and discover new places, you will get to retire your parents, you will get to buy expensive bags for your mom, you will be that rich sister/daughter/ wife, you will help people around the whole world, you will have people around you who love and care for you, you will achieve whatever dream you had since you were a kid and whatever dream you have right now. you will you will you will! know this so strongly but also know that i will achieve there one day, but i also am so blessed and grateful for the life i have right now! i have so many privileges and such an amazing life that i would never trade away for anything.

growth mindset if you fail, IT IS NOT THE END OF THE WORLD. please stop being afraid of failing, be afraid of never trying!! you have no idea how freeing failing is because once you do, then you'll never have that "what if" in the back of your mind, never have that small voice asking what could have happened if you had done that thing. so if you do fail, perfect! that means that you won't waste any more time wondering what would have happened. having a growth mindset means that you know you're human and you'll make mistakes, but that doesnt make you a bad person and it doesn't take away your capability to still accomplish your goals. if you fail be able to brush it off, and keep trying again and again. Thomas Edison had 1000 failed attempts to make the light bulb. yet he learnt from what didn't work, took that into consideration, then tried again. and again. and again. and now? your probably sitting in a room with light that you have because he persisted in his goal!

stay positive always have a positive outlook and perspective of life. look at the beauty and what you have instead of what you lack. feel happy joyful energy vibrate through you everyday. do things that just make you a more positive person in general! feeling happier makes you look 100x more attractive and will change the way you interact with the world!!

👑be a better person.

new year new you right? so its time you up level the way you talk and treat others. because the goal isn't to be A b*tch, the goal is to be THAT b*tch! so going around being rude isn't going to do anything for you. being kind however- having manners, checking up on people, asking how their day was, being charismatic, etc- thats what can get you so much more opportunities! you're going to be kind, but not a people pleaser- ofc prioritise yourself always but also at the same time- if you have made a commitment to be somewhere for someone at a certain time, honor that commitment. be the friend you wish you had.

being mean to everyone just because you were hurt by someone else is not it. yes, so you were hurt. grow, evolve, heal. you're stronger than this. you're stronger than you think. you can overcome anything and you can become an even better person, capable of loving fully and wholly!

misc tips:

change what you consume. start watching thewizardliz, tam kaur on youtube. have an inspiration/ idol to look up to in life.

workout. i dont care if its not one of your goals to have a fit body, but don't workout for that. workout because you love yourself. because its actually proven to make you happier, because you deserve a healthy, fully functioning body.

DRINK WATER. do you know how many benefits something as simple as that has? clear skin, unchapped lips, better digestive health, weight management, better health, feel more alert and energized, better for immune system, increases brain power, eliminate toxins, ETC ETC!

have a morning routine that literally sets yourself up for success. stimulate your mind with reading self help, learn something, study, focus on a skill, do something that makes your mind active.

journal & check in with yourself.- document your progress! write about how you felt after everyday. did you feel esp happy during anything? do you feel satisfied at the end of the day? or do you find that your day made you feel tired and drained? do you feel regret and wished you did more at the end of the day?

diary- links with the earlier point. document the day. you can write about it, or what i also like to do is video myself yapping to the camera. talk about whatever you want and let your mind wander free!

you are that it girl! dress the part, smell good, make yourself feel so good that you just can't help but feel like you can conqure anything!!

make sure you're consistently reminded of your goals. what do you want? why do you want to achieve it? reminding yourself of your goals will actually motivate you and make you stop procrastinating. for me its that i don't want any old projects or books having to continue into the new year so i've made a plan that will definitely get it done before the next year!

[bestanimal]

Round 2 - Arthropoda - Thecostraca

(Sources - 1, 2, 3, 4)

Thecostraca is is a class of crustaceans, many of which have planktonic larvae which become sessile or parasitic as adults. The most well-known group are the Barnacles (subclass Cirripedia), but Thecostraca also includes the parasitic Ascothoracida, and the mysterious Facetotecta.

Facetotecta, comprising only the genus Hansenocaris, are known only from their larvae (image 3) and adults have yet to be recognized, though some scientists believe they may actually be larval tantulocaridans.

Ascothoracidans are parasites of echinoderms and cnidarians. Most genera are meso and endoparasitic (living inside the host) while some are ectoparasitic (living on the outside of the host). They are similar in anatomy to copepods, with six pairs of legs, an abdomen with four segments, a telson, and a bivalved carapace. They feed on their host via piercing and sucking mouthparts, and some more advanced species also absorb nutrients through the carapace. They are sexually dimorphic, in many cases so much so that the smaller males will live inside the larger female’s mantle cavity.

Barnacles (subclass Cirripedia) are more well-known than other Thecostracans. Adult barnacles are sessile filter feeders, except for the infraclass Rhizocephala, which are parasites of other crustaceans. Barnacles attach themselves to a surface as adults, be that a rock, the shell of a mollusc, a ship, or a large animal such as a whale. They come in two common forms: acorn barnacles which grow their shells directly on a surface (image 4) and goose barnacles which attach themselves via a stalk (image 1). Barnacles have a carapace made of six calcareous plates, with a lid made of four more plates. They attach themselves to the substrate by means of a cement gland at the base of their antennae. Eight pairs of thoracic limbs, called cirri, extend from the carapace to filter plankton from the water and bring it towards the mouth. The hairs on these limbs are very sensitive to touch, and help the barnacle sense the world around them. They also have three simple eyes (ocelli) which can sense changes in light, allowing them to close their plates quickly if a shadow is detected.

Thecostracans have nauplius larvae, characterised by a head with antennules, antennae, mandables, and a single eye, three pairs of limbs, a carapace, and a telson. Barnacle larvae are brooded by the parent until their first moult, after which they are released to swim freely using setae.

The oldest known thecostracan fossil is dated from the Middle Cambrian. Traces of the parasitic forms have been dated from the Cretaceous.

Propaganda under the cut:

Barnacles have the longest penis (relative to body size) of any living animal. You can see it in action in the above gif and in this video.

Most barnacles are not parasitic (other than hitching a ride) and usually do no harm to the large animals they attach to. An overload of barnacles tends to be a symptom of an underlying issue, such as the animal being unable to shed its skin. Non-professionals scraping or pulling barnacles off of whales and turtles often does more harm than good for the affected animal!

12th-18th Century Europeans thought that Brants and Barnacle Geese emerged, fully formed, from Goose Barnacles. Gerald of Wales claimed to have seen the birds hanging down from pieces of timber, William Turner accepted the theory, and John Gerard claimed to have seen the birds emerging from their shells. In County Kerry, until relatively recently, Catholics abstaining from meat during Lent could still eat this bird because it was considered a fish.

As filter-feeders, barnacles play an important role in the ecosystem: not only for transferring nutrients up the food chain, but also for keeping the water clean.

When a barnacle chooses its home, it produces a biological glue made of six different proteins. While the glue hardens, it accumulates limestone salts, turning into a concrete-like shell. Barnacle glue is six times stronger than any manmade glue. Scientists are trying to replicate this glue for use in the fields of engineering, construction and medicine, where it can be used as a biological sealant during or post-surgery.

[zepskies]

@lamentationsofalonelypotato

Aww I'm so happy to hear that, friend!! 🥰🥰

It's not a problem Dean, (the gun is obviously BUT) she is beautiful and you will love her and I will cry at your wedding.

Ehehe it's funny you mention their wedding...

Dean no. No feeling bad for saving your girl and for killing the "sack of shit in human clothes."

Ugh right? Trust, he doesn't regret killing that bastard loll.

Also I didn't notice the Colonel Sanderson thing before and now all I can think about is KFC lol.😂 Which is not to take away from how good this fic is or how well it's written. It's just me lol.

Actually THANK YOU for noticing that because Colonel Sanders was an intentional reference! lmao I saw some meme that called Asmodeus "Bullshit Colonel Sanders" and it made me cackle, so I included that a little bit here. 😂😂

Oh goodness she is already so protective of him and oh my word the wink had me melting lol.

See! It's not taking that long at all for her to start softening up towards him loll. At the very least, she doesn't want to see him killed for her after killing for her.

I also don't think that I mentioned this before, but I really like how you wove in the other characters in the show. Seeing Benny and Cas show up just made me so happy.

Aww thank you!! 🥰🥰 When it comes to AUs, I try my best to fit in canon characters where they make the most sense to me, and try to make them feel "as themselves" as possible.

Oh my word seeing that fight in my head, um... YES PLEASE. And the loyalty?! The love for their friend?! The "Goodbye brother."? It's so good.

Imagining Dean in uniform, even if he's fighting his friends, just does things to me too loll.

Ultimately, Benny and Cas are good men even in this world, and they didn't want to have to bring in him or Mila to the Colonel either. 💜

She's squishing his face! That is so cute, oh my stars. Plus I am cackling at how long it took him to be able to say her name.

Ahaha this was my favorite part to write for this chapter! Dean struggled, bless his heart. 🤣🤣🤣

I absolutely love this! I really love it when writers pick the names of their characters based on the meaning behind it. And the fact that you gave the meaning of her name a backstory of her mom having a dream and the butterfly meaning that Mila "would have a free mind" is just so perfect for her. Because she is stubborn and she does have "a free mind" by being rebellious and strong, by being a strong female character who does not conform to the whims of what other people deem to be appropriate for her. Also it was funny that Dean thought she was like a "lioness."

Aww thank you!! I'm usually pretty conscious of names and the meanings behind them, but especially in this story I got deep into the research of the Lakota people, and I found that names are very important to their culture, now and historically.

When I was looking for a name for her, Kimmímila stood out as being beautiful (with a nice nickname), but perhaps on surface level didn't reflect her true personality. So that's why I worked in that backstory with her mother's dream, vs. who she wanted her daughter to be, and who Mila considers herself to be. And bonus, what Dean observes of her! lol

So I absolutely love all of your observations here, because that's exactly what I intended for her!

This is a really wonderful line, that the war "never really ends." It really fits this story and honestly it really fits the entire early history of the United States when it was acquiring territory and embracing the "manifest destiny" ideals.

Aww thank you so much!! That's what I thought as well, not just for this story, but for the greater context of U.S. history during this time and the push to industrialize the entire country.

Okay, the whole part where she is explaining things about her life and her culture was so sweet. Them opening up with one another is just so soft and a little fluffy and I'm so glad that they got to have those gentle moments with one another. Not to mention this bit where Dean admits how much he likes listening to her, is just so good lol. And I thought it was really on brand for him to be a little upset that she doesn't completely trust him yet, even though that he killed one of his men. But he's got to learn to be patient... and then propose. LOL.

That was so fun for me too! The "getting to know you" aspect. I thought that opening up to one another was needed here, and it gave an opportunity for more historical tidbits!

Ahaha yep, she's a hard nut to crack, but Dean need only be patient. He's won a lot more brownie points with her than he realizes. 😏 "And then propose" -- I'm weeeak!! 🤣

Don't be afraid to admit it Mila, we all know how good he is to look at. And why shouldn't you look at your future husband? 💍

Ha!! Ikr?? Also, you're getting dangerously warm to what's coming in Part 3. ❤️‍🔥

Oh my sweet goodness, the TENSION!! This is so good my friend and I am so excited for what the future of this series holds and am praying that it doesn't end in death!😬💗

The romantic tension is real!! lmaoo

Thank you so, so much, friend!! Part 3 is my favorite part, I think, and I hope you'll be happy with the outcome, even though we've got a fair bit of action and angst ahead...

The Honorable Choice - Part 2

Pairing: Dean Winchester x OFC 

Summary: June 1872. Captain Dean Winchester of the U.S. Cavalry is tasked with one job: break a wild mustang. He just didn’t expect the woman who infiltrates his camp, intent on freeing her tribe’s horse.

AN: “Getting to know you, getting to know all about you…” ⬅️ If you’ve seen The King & I, then you’ll probably be singing that line in your head like I do.

Disclaimer: I’ve done extensive research for this one, both on the American Indian Lakota tribe, and on American history during this time in the late 1800s (AKA: the Old West, during the American Indian Wars and the Sioux Wars). Of course, one of my main goals is to avoid inaccuracies, both historical and cultural.

Jacklesverse Bingo24 Prompt: @jacklesversebingo Western AU

Song Inspo: The Spirit Soundtrack

Word Count: 3.1K

Tags/Warnings: Angst, protective Dean, historical tidbits, fluff

🐎 Series Masterlist || Bingo Masterlist

🎙️ Listen to the podfic version here!

Part 2: Death & Sacrifice

Dean falls out of his saddle with a yell, landing hard in the grass. The impact knocks the air out of his chest and the hat off his head, not to mention the pain that rattles down his back.

“Son of a bitch,” he wheezes, while trying to get back up.

The woman jumps down from the mustang’s back and all but leaps on Dean. Straddling his waist and grabbing a fistful of his collar, she lets out a battle cry and raises a small knife at him. It’s probably no more than two inches long.

Dean may be on the ground with a smarting forehead, but he’s still got the upper hand. He grabs her knife-wielding arm and whips out his pistol from his belt. Her eyes widen, and she stills above him. The gun lies between them, aimed for her chest. They’re both breathing hard.

Dean has a problem.

Looking into her eyes, soulful and brown, the slope of her nose and her full lips, parted with shock… 

He just can’t do it.

His finger eases off the trigger of his gun, and he lowers it to the ground beside him.

“I told you,” he says. “I’m not gonna hurt you.”

Her head tilts as she stares at his gun, then at him. She relaxes somewhat, and she backs off of him, sliding from his lap down to the grass beside him. Her closed fist with the knife comes to rest at her side. She gives him a look of wary bewilderment.

“You are a strange man,” she says.

Dean has to laugh a little, smiling at her afterward.

“I guess so,” he replies.

Her brows furrow. “You killed one of your own…for me?”

He nods, and his smile falls with a weary sigh. The hard part about that is he doesn’t feel much guilt about what he’s done. At the same time, he does, and the conflict churns in his stomach. He knew what kind of man Roman was. He was the kind of soldier that could’ve filled Colonel Sanderson’s shoes one day. A fellow soldier under Dean’s command...

And a sack of shit in human clothes.

Dean leans back on his hands in the grass and slides his legs out long. His stare falls to the earth between his boots. The ground is soft underneath him. Maybe it rained this morning. 

“Yeah, that’s gonna make it tough when I go back,” he says. “At best, that’s a court martial. At worst…”

The Lakota woman frowns, her dark brows nearly meeting in the middle as she considers him. He wonders what she sees when she looks at him.

“Tell you what,” Dean said. “Give yourself and your horse a rest tonight. I’ll go back and tell them I lost you in the canyon.”

Her eyes widen further in surprise. He can’t blame her for it. He’s surprising himself every time he opens his mouth.

“Will they kill you?” she asks.

Dean shrugs. “Nah, I’ll be fine.”

She levels him with a firmer look, one that demands the truth.

His nonchalance wanes, and he sighs.

“They might,” he says.

She shakes her head. She seems to deliberate over something, but eventually she comes to a decision. Just when she opens her mouth to speak, a gunshot rings out and hits the ground not far from their feet. A warning.

The sound of hooves thundering on the earth reach them before they look up. Two horses gallop towards them in the distance, their riders wearing blue uniforms.

They both tense up, but Dean is the first one to move. He grabs her arm and helps her stand along with him. They scramble back and lead the horses by their reins further into the trees. They find a denser patch and a raised hill to crouch down and hide behind.

The mustang is too tired to go very far, but Baby is already making anxious sounds, protective of her rider.

“Shhh,” Dean whispers, and runs a soothing hand over her side. He leads her to lay down with her legs tucked underneath her.

The Lakota manages to do the same with the mustang after whispering to him softly in her language. There’s a trust between them, Dean realizes. They have a connection that seems to mirror his own with his horse. He doesn’t know how he didn’t see it before.

“Captain!” Benny calls out.

Dean grimaces, but he stays quiet. He turns to the woman and holds a finger over his lips. She stares back at him in apprehension. He begins to creep slowly around the hill, but she grabs onto his wrist. For a second, she looks just as surprised as him by the reflexive action. Then, she shakes her head at him.

Don’t go out there, her eyes say.

Dean smiles, and he gives her a reassuring wink. He gently removes her hand and gestures at her to stay where she is. He army crawls up the side of the hill. It gives him a vantage point to watch his men, who approach just a few feet down below. 

“Captain Winchester!” Cas calls next.

“We don’t want to have to come and get you, Dean. Come on,” Benny says. He does sound reluctant, for his part. His voice grows more somber when he says, “Colonel’s given us orders to bring you and the girl back…dead or alive.”

Dean knows the position he’s put his own men in. He doesn’t blame them for following the Colonel’s orders. He just hopes they can forgive him for what he’s about to do.

He leaps off the edge of the hill with a yell and brings Benny with him to the ground. He sweeps Cas’s legs out from underneath him, then tosses a punch that lands on the corner of Benny’s chin. He kicks Benny’s gun away, and wrestles Cas until his pistol falls from his hand. The three men scrap and trade blows, until Dean is the only one left standing. His men are groaning on the dusty ground, slowly picking themselves up.

Dean’s heaving for breath as well as he leans back against the side of the hill. Despite that momentary victory, he knows what they all know: that this fight isn’t going to end until either they’re dead, or he’s dead.

“Where’s the girl, Dean?” Benny says. He implores him to see sense. “We take her back with us, we can smooth all this over with the Colonel. All of it, even Roman.” 

Dean lets out a deep breath, but he shakes his head.

“Can’t do that, Benny,” he says. “I’m sorry.”

There’s a question circling in his friend’s eyes, but after a beat, Benny seems to know the answer to it. He picks up his gun from the ground. Just like Dean once did, the Lieutenant now has a choice to make.

He shares a heavy look with Cas. The two of them nod, before they focus back on Dean.

Benny’s hand falls, and he stows his gun.

“You died today,” Benny says. “We found your body somewhere in the canyon. Your horse too.”

Dean nods, with something of a smile. He supposes faking his death is the only option now. He rips the badge off his uniform jacket and tosses it to Benny.

“There’s your proof,” he says.

Dean shares a grim nod of respect with Cas while Benny examines the torn patch denoting a captain’s rank.

“Take care of each other,” Dean says.

Benny’s head raises, and he meets Dean with a somber gaze.

“Goodbye, brother.”

Dean doesn’t return to her until the men are out of sight through the trees. She’s still hiding along with the resting horses, waiting for him. That alone surprises him. It would bring a small smile to his face, if the weight of that goodbye didn’t feel so heavy on his shoulders.

He reaches out a hand for her. It takes her a moment to consider it, but she accepts his offer.

He helps her to her feet, after which, she quickly pulls her hand back. She’s wary of his touch, her face guarded when she looks up at him. Dean supposes he can’t blame her, even if it does strike a nerve. After what he just did for her…

His face becomes stoic, and he turns away to grab his hat from the dusty ground. “We should probably head out.”

She nods and calls to her horse to encourage him to his feet. Despite himself, Dean can't help but be curious. How did this girl manage to tame that wild beast?

“Does he have a name?” he asks.

“Mato,” she replies.

“Mato,” Dean echoes. “Does that mean something? You know, in your language.”

She eyes him wryly, brushing her hand over Mato’s hide.

“It means angry, like a bear,” she says.

Dean snorts. “Yeah, good name.”

He remembers his bruised side (and ego) from when the mustang threw him off his back.

Dean watches her with another realization as she gracefully mounts the horse. Baby has gotten up to her feet as well, already nudging the back of his arm with her snout. He rubs her nose in affection.

Then he turns to climb up onto her back, settling his feet into the stirrups and loosely grabbing the reins. He follows his companion’s lead farther into the forest, but he guides his horse to fall into step beside hers.

“Will you tell me your name now?” he asks. “Think we’ve been through enough together at this point, don’t you think?”

She considers it with a tilt of her head. She looks over at him with a small smile.

“Kimmímila,” she says. The syllables roll off her tongue effortlessly.

Dean raises his brows. “Kim…Kimmeela.”

She shakes her head at him, her lips pursing.

“Kimmímila.”

Lord help him, but he tries his best. His brows furrow.

“Kim…mila,” he attempts. She guides Mato closer and grabs Dean by his cheeks with one hand.

“Kimmí.”

“Kimmí,” he repeats with his cheeks squished. His face is starting to warm up, and not altogether in embarrassment.

“Mila,” she says with a nod.

“Mila,” Dean says. “Kimmímila.”

He’s treated to her smile, warm and true. She releases him, her gaze flitting over his face. Then she keeps riding. Dean grins to himself.

“Think I’m gonna call you Mila,” he says. Make it easier on myself.

She even laughs, a honeyed sound. “Yes, my father does too.”

“What does it mean? Your name.”

“In your language?” she says, in a tone that teases him back. She becomes thoughtful as she searches for the word. “It means…butterfly.”

“Really?” Dean remarks. She doesn’t strike him as a butterfly.

More like a lioness, he thinks, only somewhat holding back his grin.

She gives him some side-eye, despite her amusement.

“You think it does not suit me,” she observes.

“Well, I didn't say that—”

“I don’t think so either,” she admits. “There are many things that don’t suit me.”

Dean chuckles. He can imagine that.

“But my mother had a dream before I was born,” Mila says. “She saw beautiful wings, and said I would have a free mind. When I grew, and wanted to spend my days with horses more than cooking and sewing things, she didn’t call me free. She called me stubborn.” Her face begins to fall. “Maybe too stubborn.”

Dean offers her a rueful, sympathetic look. “Yeah, I get it. My brother always said I was damn hardheaded,” he says. “…Maybe we’ve got more in common than we thought, huh?”

Mila’s smile returns, however slightly.

“You have a brother?” she asks.

“Oh, yeah. He’s a lawyer, so he’s more needed back home,” Dean replies.

Damn. He really does miss his bookish little brother.

He explains to her about his family, his brother and mother who still live in Lawrence, and how he joined the army, in part to honor his father.

“What happened to him?” she asks.

“He died…in some cornfield near Sharpsburg, Maryland, fighting the Confederacy,” he replies, heaving a breath.

"Con...federacy?" she questions.

"The South," Dean explains. "See, most of our southern states thought they should be their own country, letting slaves plow their fields and mind their kids. I may have lived on a farm, but my father always paid his workers. He fought for the Union."

"So you fought among yourselves, over land that did not belong to you," Mila points out.

Dean falls silent. After a little while, he concedes her point with an incline of his head.

"Fair enough," he says, glancing over at her. “I think my dad thought the fighting would end with the war, but, uh...it never really ends, does it?”

Her expression of curiosity fades, turning more solemn.

“No,” she agrees. “…I am sorry for your father.”

Dean's a little surprised to hear that from her, but he nods his thanks. They continue to talk as the sun begins to set in the west. When it dips behind the canyon, they stop to make camp for the night, and he helps her catch a rabbit to roast on the fire they build together.

That night over the meal, she slowly opens up to him. He learns that she’s an only child, though she has a sibling-like bond with her older cousin, Šóta. She spends most of her days planting or harvesting their crops, depending on the season, as well as sewing, painting, helping the elders of her tribe with tasks, and helping her mother and aunt cook.

When the rabbit is gone, she unbinds her long, thick hair and untangles it while she speaks. She explains that the Lakota are just one of many tribes. There are six other bands of Sioux who live in this region. Along with the Dakota and the Nakota, they are the “Seven Council Fires” who have made the Great Plains their home for generations.

She tells him about the way her tribe lives, caring for one another, giving the land back as much as they take, and letting it rest. The men hunt and protect the village from the outside, but the women protect the inside, their way of life.

Most of all, Mila tells him, she loves caring for the horses. She goes out and rides whenever she can duck out of her mother’s watchful eye.

Dean enjoys listening to her stories. He likes what he learns about her, but also, he just likes the sound of her voice, smooth and steady, almost calming. He thinks she might like the sound of his too, the way she’s smiled at him, laughed with him, glanced at him when she thinks he’s not looking.

She still picks a spot as far away from him as she can to sleep though. She keeps the fire pit in between them. He even catches sight of her knife, hidden in the hand she tucks underneath her cheek. Evidently, she doesn’t fully trust him just yet.

It annoys him at first, considering how many times he’s saved her already. How much he’s sacrificed just to get them this far…

Until he remembers how they met. He remembers the disdain and anger in her brown eyes, then the mistrust, and the fear hidden underneath. He thinks of every experience she’s likely had so far with the U.S. Military, and anyone else who looks like him.

Dean settles down on the ground and stares up at the innumerable stars in a raven sky. He’s exhausted, but his thoughts don’t let him rest for a while. 

At the very least, the way she looks at him now is softer than that first day.

In the morning, Mila watches the strange man wake.

He blinks and rubs his bleary eyes, yawning, groaning at the sun’s brightness like a child. She hides her smile by bowing her head over the apple she’s cutting with her knife. The orchards span wide across the forest, and soon he’ll find two yellow-red apples beside his head.

His brows raise at them, then he looks up at Mila sitting with her legs crossed behind the small fire pit. The wood there is just ash and blackened remains now, but it still carries the smell of burning.

“Morning,” he greets.

She nods back at him and pretends not to watch when he sits up with a groan, stretching and bending his arms high behind his head. He removed his uniform jacket to sleep. It allows her to see every dip of male muscle that his plain white shirt clings to, even in the long sleeves.

Her gaze furtively runs over the broad shoulders, the tapered waist, then back up to his half-bearded face, defined by a strong jaw and dark brows. The sun catches on his brown hair and teases the ends of it golden.

She would never admit it, but he’s not unpleasant to look at. 

Last night, she declined his offer to travel with her until she reaches her tribe safely, but he was insistent. Again, strange.

So here she is, with him. Here they are. 

Dean turns to see the horses grazing nearby. Mato no longer has the saddle and bridle his men put on him. He looks rested and at ease. He even whinnies at Baby, tossing his head a little. She answers him and flicks her tail. They continue eating together.

Dean smiles, then grabs an apple. He raises it to her in thanks before he takes a large bite. Its juices run down the corner of his mouth, and he wipes at it with the back of his hand. Mila can’t help but be drawn to the sight.

She tears her eyes away when he looks over at her.

“We have a long way to go. Three days, if the weather is good,” she says, continuing to carve pieces of her apple to eat. “We will know we are close when we reach the river.”

Dean nods in understanding. With a grunt, he gets to his feet and takes another bite out of his breakfast. She doesn’t expect the way he approaches her with a hand outstretched. She looks up at it, then at his expectant face.

“Come on. Let’s hit the road then,” he says.

Mila considers his offer for another moment. He seems to be making this a habit. Amused, she wonders if this is just kindness, or if the women of his people aren’t allowed to stand without a man’s help.

She pockets her knife, swipes her braided hair over her shoulder, and slips her hand into his, allowing him to help her to her feet. When she gets there, he’s closer than he should be.

A breath gets trapped in her throat as she once again looks between his warm hand closed over her smaller one, and his face. In the small space between them, there is a different kind of tension than before. Mila can’t tell what the man is thinking when he looks at her like that, but she doesn’t like it.

And at the same time, she does.

She takes back her hand, and she goes to the horses. She firmly ignores how her heart gallops, even as she rubs at her chest like it’s an ache that can be soothed.

She doesn’t hear Dean’s unsteady breath, nor does she see the way his green eyes follow her.

AN: *rubs hands together* Well, here they are! It's all starting to come together. What did you think of Dean's decision?

Coming up next, we have the final part: some action, some fluff, and some potentially perilous situations for Mila and Dean...

Next Time:

“Yeah, about that…I’m thinking your tribe doesn’t take very well to outsiders,” he says. “White men in particular.”

Mila presses her lips together. He can tell she’s been thinking the same thing, but she turns to him with a determined set to her features.

“I will protect you,” she says.

Dean frowns. He doesn’t like the sound of that. On one hand, it warms him that she seems to really mean it. On the other hand, he doesn’t want to know what it’ll take for her to protect him.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” he asks.

She turns her face away and doesn’t seem to want to answer at first.

“Mila…”

“The Chief is my uncle,” she says at last. “He will listen to me.”

Dean blinks. Well, that changes things…maybe.

COMING 11/17! (New chapters every Sunday.)

Or read Part 3 on Patreon now!

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[jaal-ama-daravv]

With Emmrich's romance which version do u prefer lich or not? And why?

Oh this is a hard one for me, I am very torn on which path I prefer.

Thank you so much for asking!

Allow me to explain why I am torn -

Lich Path

This path holds a place in my heart. On one hand, Emmrich has achieived his dreams of lichdom and averted his fear of death. We love an ambitious king who remains irrevocably in love. But he has not faced his fear, he averted it. Emmrich's fear of death most likely stems from his parents and with being apart of the Watchers since he was a child - similar to Rook Ingellvar. If Emmrich takes up lichdom, his fear of death does not dissapear, it transfers to Rook.

Whilst both mortal and lich Emmrich fear Rook's death quite heavily, when Emmrich is a lich, this fear is based around Rook's death and Emmrichs inevitable grief that will follow for eternity. I am of the mind where I believe that Emmrich would 'go rogue' if Rook were to pass on. Purely because of the type of love they share, Emmrich's past, and that he would not be able to cope with the loss of the flame of his heart. The most magnificant thing to ever happen to him.

In saying that, when Emmrich takes up lichdom, Rook states that Emmrich has everything he needs to tackle Lichdom. (i.e., you can accept the death of others, including Rook). Incredibly wrong, so incredibly wrong as seen throughout the rest of the romance following. A) His argument with Rook about death and living without them for eternity (man would go rogue due to who he is as a person), B) He is found by Davrin crying in his room, alone, after the death of Manfred. C) Throughout the banter in the game, Emmrich avoids and/or is cold to the topic of Manfred's death. Dismissing and avoiding any claim that he misses him.

Emmrich is not equipped to take up lichdom because he feels so deeply, and loves so deeply. So fucking deeply. He borderlines being an empath with OCPD if you wanna get literal. His obsessions and compulsions being death, affection, and magic.

Whilst I believe that both paths embody the soulmate trope, I adore this path because it transcends reality and they would, Emmrich would, find Rook in each world. Through any means neccessary. Yes - Emmrich is about rules and order, and is gentle and kind, but this man (now lich lord) is a powerful mage. A very powerful mage who can speak to the dead. There are hints throughout his romance that he would go unhinged should his weakness (Rook) be exploited (aka, dead). Read about and see more below -

See cinematic here, and dissection of the romance here.

Mortal Path

I am yet to dissect the mortal argument & romance scene, however they will be coming shortly, but for now I will expand my thoughts here. You can find the intial romance dissection here .

Mortal Emmrich path is incredibly wholesome and fullfilling. Emmrich gives up his dream for his love for Manfred. Whilst this is heartwarming to others, it does not tick my boxes personally. I wouldve preferred Emmrich consideration of mortality to be a mixture of Rook and Manfred. In saying that though, Emmrich's lichdom path has a significant amount of more romance-esque dialogue. Particularly in the romance and lichdom decision scenes. So it's an odd choice for the developers, or an oversight. I think I am turned off by it a tad because there is minimal fear towards Rook's death. Whereas Lich Emmrich is devastatingly scared. Idk, I'm in two minds.

I really do love the mortal path as I believe it adds more depth to Emmrich, it adds a layer of resilence instead of avoidance. Thinking of the romance scenes, the mortal scene is about love and wanting eachother, whereas the lich path is about desire and acceptance. Both are remarkable. God this is hard.

Emmrich's fear of death does extend to Rook during the argument scene and this is evident throughout the rest of the game and romance. Stating that he is afraid he will die and be a burden to Rook. These romance argument scenes are flipped in retrospect - In the mortal scene, Emmrich fears his own death will hurt Rook, and is terrified of that because he loves her so much. In the lich scene, Emmrich is terrified of Rook's death and the pain it will cause him because he loves her so much. My one grivenance with this scene is that Emmrich can say, "At your age?" in a condescending tone which I think it very out of character. But aso backs up my point that he has a fire to him.

However, the mortal romance has a significant amount of benefit to it. A) Emmrich somewhat learns to deal with his mortality, B) He has Manfred, C) They can spend their post-game days enjoying their life together, instead of the fear that will forever creep on Lich Emmrich.

I implore you to also remeber that it is evident that mortal path Emmrich believes that he is 'too old' to enjoy this type of love. He never thought it would come to fruition. This is evident by the banter, dialogue, and flirt options throughout the game. "its gratifying a fresh faced adventurer noticed me at all" and more. Hence his fear and feelings of burden towards Rook being evident in the argument scene. I'll break this down more later.

Give The Eternal Flame a read.

At the end of the day, Rook was right. Things would be easier to deal with if Manfred were around.

Verdict

I really, really, really love both and Im really torn between them because they are both fantastic and have individual meaning whilst remaining true to the concept that Emmrich and MW Rook are made for eachother. Soulmates. It honestly pains me to say, but at this point in time - I think at the end of the day, as much as I love the Lich romance, and the more content it posesses. Like, love love love the lich romance. Unless there was a canon way in the future for Rook to join him in Lichdom, I prefer the mortal romance path.

This is due to 3 reasons -

A) Whilst the romance content in game is better for his Lich romance and appeals more to my favourute tropes, becoming a lich lord is not something Emmrich is equipped for. He would need a romanced Rook to join him to be 'fine', if that. Inevitably, Lichdom is his way to avert his fears, not face them.

B) Mages can live for an incredibly long time. Especially ones that are entwined with the Fade. Even more so ones that can speak to the dead. I think there is some meaning for that we will uncover in future game adaptions.

C) Emmrich states that he is happier with Rook and Manfred and would not give it up for anything. Whilst both romance scenes are incredibly powerful and romantic, the mortal romance scene is a masterpiece with facial expressions and tension. You can feel the love. Whilst you can feel the love in the Lich romance scene, it is centered around acceptance. See below.

At the end of the day it comes back to the question of what would Emmrich's parents want for him? The question that confirms his romance. They woud want him to be happy, with someone who cares for him. And that is Rook. Emmrich would be happy for the rest of his life. Emmrich has yearned for this love his entire life. Lich Emmrich would be happy, for a time. Then descend into madness, leaving him unhappy and distraught.

[zombeebunnie]

the game is so atmospheric I'm losing my mind!!!

i actually feel cold and apprehensive like i'm lost and soaked in a swamp and the fog is just playfully messing with me, the vibes are out of this world!!!!! this is like playing silent hill 2 and listening to the dogs bark in the distance and you get the chills!!

noah is a beauty, i love his design. and his beautiful morning glory blues blah blah his long dark Lucious hair blah blah whatever you say king blah blah you're so right on anything

i never argue with a beautiful dark skinned blue eyed gentleman.

my crack theory is he ( and mayhaps the mc too) are swamp creatures maybe nikki or something idk i'm new here lmao

btw can i kiss noah on the cheek, a very chaste and innocent kiss, is that allowed on here???? 🥺👉👈

Firstly thank you so much for playing, your words mean a lot towards the game and enjoyment of Noah along with his overall character! :,,]]

I've been getting better with writing over time so one of the several things I really wanted to do is make the start of the game have a very immersive feel as if you're actually there and to give an idea on how the environment effects the player(Y/N). I really appreciate the Silent hill 2 comment! :D A lot of the dialog and CG's were also fixed and updated starting around late spring of this year. I've also been fixing up the cabin and the player(Y/N)'s interactions with Noah. There were a few moments with Noah that didn't make it into the [Extended Demo] which included some more light-hearted situations. :,] I can't say too much on theories of any kind due to spoilers. :[] Also little requests like this are fine, I drew something similar here and here! There's also this old Valentine's Day concept art sketch I did here! :P

But overall, thank you for your kind words! :,]

[angstics]

I always thought black parade is about a horrible person who feels sorry for himself. He’s hurt people over his honor (being a soldier and all that) but I don’t see the fascism. He’s self centered and he doesn’t care if we feel sorry/happy for him but I genuinely don’t understand how that ties into fascism. I haven’t watched cabaret and maybe that’s why but to my understanding cabaret is directly affected by war but the patient isn’t. At least not when he’s in the hospital.

I feel like this is something Mcr is starting to build rather than something that has always been there? Can you explain a bit more? I feel really stupid and I love art so not understanding it hurts. I read your posts btw but yeah I don’t get it? Maybe I am stupid after all

this isnt related to intelligence at all, i dont think im reading any like Secret Messages behind black parade. everyone has their own reading of what bp means. a lot of the ideas i post are incomplete and only really make sense in my head because it caters to MY thoughts, MY experiences, MY enjoyment. i felt so jubilant about identifying the fascist imagery because i feel like it's an Underrated (not hidden) part of the black parade. but it mostly does so through APPROPRIATION and EXPRESSIONISM.

appropriation is what i mean by black parade co-opting the concept of cabaret: ignoring the world's troubles via entertainment leading to destruction inside the soul and outside in the world. cabaret is about fascism, black parade is about depression. the narrator is inside his mind, his entertaining space, self centered and self flagellating, to the detriment of his own life. by Alluding to a story about fascism, i like reading that theme into black parade as well. Expressionism is a recent development in my conception of black parade. i thought bp was APOLITICAL until i realized that the personal theme could symbolize a wider critique, the way german expressionism was a reflection of troubled, decaying society.

there are also some elements of fascistic theme within the text, but theyre milder than the overwhelming themes of self-hatred, memory etc. these elements include the overwhelming presence of war and retribution (mother war, mama, welcome, teenagers, sleep). the portraits by chris anthony read very dark to me, these military-straight, brooding, rigid characters. the destruction in the streets of the welcome music video. all elements that speak to an unnamed destructive force that must be squashed, or a need for a leader that can be a savior. the "black parade" as an army that welcomes you to valhallah. there's more to say im sure, i just havent thought about it outside the personal perspective much.

your ideas can co-exist with my ideas. there is no one true reading. this is just what i like thinking about!!

[iwriteasfotini]

Major Jegulus Fluff and Sap

323 words of excerpt below my little commentary.

Feeling generous and just so impatient to share the more mature years of the story. You all don't know it yet, but I am a sucker for super sappy Jegulus. Like so sweet it might turn your stomach. Just wait...

What I'm posting versus what I'm currently writing and editing is like two different worlds. So here is some of a future installment which hasn't even been announced yet. O.o

Reg POV, sixth/seventh year

...

“Yes, I love healing with you.” James walked to the toilet and started to pee, Regulus left the door open as he walked to the kitchen. 

They lounged about, James telling Regulus stories. Then Regulus told a few of his own. He told James about the night they met on the astronomy tower, how he was already head over heels for Sirius’ best friend, James Potter. How James had grabbed his hand and Regulus felt truly seen by someone for the first time in years. 

“I used to take certain routes between lessons because I’d cross your path,” admitted Regulus. 

James laughed, “didn’t people think that was strange?”

“I was usually alone, no one even noticed. Including you.”

James gave him a mild look, “I started falling for you the day we crossed paths on the quidditch pitch. You were such a snarky little bitch. I loved it.”

“I saw you on Platform Nine and Three-Quarters when I was ten. You were running through the crowd laughing and I thought you looked so free.”

“I was so nervous my first day,” said James. “I covered it all up with exuberant behavior.”

“Does that imply you are actually an anxiety ridden wreck and cover it up with general arrogance?”

“Aṉpu,” said James, hand over his heart, “of course I’m an anxiety ridden wreck. Half of my heart is walking around outside of my body.”

“You know how it feels then?”

“To see you and feel like I was holding my breath. To feel my heart restart when I catch a glimpse of you across the great hall. To know that I’m the only one who knows all of you. Yeah Reg, I know how it feels.” James wove their fingers together.

...

I mean is this cruel to share knowing the work isn't going up on Ao3 for a year... SO MUCH to share before then. Including all those little moments the boys alluded to. ;-)

Check out my pinned post for more info, currently posting year one of this epic series!

iwriteasfotini on Ao3

PS My beta reader (and partner) who is cis, straight, white, and mid-thirties says my Jegulus scenes often invoke eyerolling for him. "Here we go again." Fuck yes, here we go again. And again. And again! Never too much sappy Jegulus. XXXXXXX

PPS It should speak volumes he's willing to plow through those lovey dovey Jegulus moments for everything else I'm bringing in this series. Brace yourselves people, shite's going to get real!

[lovelucilfer]

candy corn and skittles for sasuke and twix and snickers for chrollo!!!!!

Kendall, the sweetest strawberry in the patch!! 💖

I'm sorry for getting to this so much later than planned, but some for Chrollo too even ahhhhh! Thank you so much for asking!! 🥺💕

candy corn – what cute/corny/cheesy nicknames do you use for each other?

Sasuke isn't big on nicknames, and when I say this what I mean is that he's not really one to use them. That doesn't mean he isn't fond of the ones I use for him!! Which are babe, sweetheart, and love (unless of course Naruto should overhear and decide to mimic me, then he isn't so fond). As for me, Sasuke usually just prefers to call me by name. But when we're alone or out of earshot of other people, and I'm blushing? Then I'm his lil' tomato.... 😳 More on that here.

skittles – what color(s) remind you of the other(s)?

I was hoping to get this one!! Sasuke is deep navy and dark blues for me. Kind of like the night sky? Because that's when I feel the safest and most at peace, and he gives me the same feeling. Also because blues symbolize trust and loyalty. And though I associate myself with yellow, I think white makes Sasuke think of me more. White is a fresh start. It's pure and true (like my love for him), it's in the onigiri I make for him, it's a blank page or canvas (and I'm an artist). It's also like I'm another light in his life? Very... if he's the night sky, I'm the stars sort of thing kdjbvhjvfbdjd 🙈

twix – in what ways do you complement each other?

This is the hardest one to answer so far. >.< But I think that Chrollo and I are both quite reflective thinkers, who really crave to understand the things that interest us deeply? Even if those interests are entirely different, I think we have a lot of respect for how the other's mind works, and so conflict is minimal. Also I feel the need to mention that I am a taurus and he is a scorpio... and I think that speaks for itself.

snickers – what’s the dumbest/silliest thing that makes all of you laugh?

Hmm, in the au where I am also a nen user, and frequently commissioned by Chrollo to assist the troupe with heists... we like to people watch while we're playing our parts at whatever grand event he has his sights set on upending. We'll see who can get a better read on the other guests, or otherwise come up with ridiculous fake lives/backstories for everyone who passes by. In the au where I'm a civilian/have no idea who he is, we do this in parks and cafes. 🤭

[rings-of-power-realm]

Literally crying (the good kind) after watching that trailer for like the fifth time today and I'm just so overwhelmed because this show Middle Earth and everyone in it is so important to me and these trailers have been so epic and beautiful full of emotion and light and dark and everything I love from Tolkien and LOTR films (since the trilogy was how I first got into Middle Earth) and I never thought I'd see something that would compare to LOTR Trilogy but The Rings of Power truly does. I care so much about these characters just like I do Frodo and Sam and Aragorn and Eowyn etc.

And it also makes me emotional hearing Bears beautiful rousing score once again he is gonna knock it out of the park. Im crying at Celebrimbor at Elronds desperate fight to save the world and people he loves at Galadriel and the huge weight she carries. I am so invested in them all.

It looks phenomenal from the music and costumes to the dialogue and set pieces this world is real they have made magic and it deserves so much appreciation so much love because I can see that it is made with heart and soul and is a story for all time, one that I am so grateful to hold so close.

[relicsongmel]

The Hawthorne twins suffered more than Jesus

[ollylotl]

I WANT TO HEAR YOUR DAKOTA N VYNCENT THOUGHTS SO BAD please tell me about them.....

oooh dakota and vyncent…, where do i start. i warn you i don't normally do like. character analysis writing type posts? so please excuse if it's bad.

they have perhaps the most strained relationship out of the prime defenders. but that's not necessarily a bad thing. it's really compelling. they're very similar but also very different at the same time. and maybe this is why they can sort of grate against each other sometimes, but is also why they are such good friends who can rely on each other.

vyncent grew up living a life that, while not necessarily comfortable, he was familiar with. he was happy and he had a support system in the greats and his parents. that got ripped away from him very suddenly and he got dropped in the deep end of a world entirely unfamiliar. meanwhile dakota (from after his parents death onwards) had a very difficult childhood. he spent many years without a support system - his parents gone, his aunt struggling herself and not able to care for him as he needs. but he's had time to learn to deal with that. rockfall/new haven is where he's grown up, and he knows it like the back of his hand. so they're both struggling but like in opposite ways? where vyncent has been okay for most of his life but now he hasn't had a chance to adjust, while dakota's been going through it for longer but that means he's been able to adjust and is familiar with the rules of this world.

they also have opposite ways of coping with bad things / tackling their problems. dakota shuts down. vyncent lashes out. dakota is determined to never take a life. vyncent comes from a world where fighting to the death is normal. dakota not only trusts, but idolises heroes. vyncent has been nothing but let down by them and doesn't trust them at all.

i think about that scene in season 1 so much where they're at mark's house, and tide has been taken, and dakota's just shut down. vyncent starts yelling at him because he's lost everything he had in this world and can't afford to just stop like that. it's just the perfect example of how their opposite experiences and coping mechanisms cause them to clash.

more extremely, when william gets killed. dakota completely breaks down, while vyncent starts attacking even more furiously. then vyncent is like. almost pleading (? you could say? not sure if thats the word) with dakota to just get up and fight because he can't do this alone. he can't do this without dakota. he couldn't have done any of this without dakota.

but in perhaps the more simple ways, they're quite alike. they're the epitome of dumb teenage boys. i mean, they'll just break into a duet on the train. they goof off together - the shopping cart race, that one scene in the gym in season one.

so. like. they lean on each other. they both don't have much to rely on. but they have each other. i think vyncent was probably, even if its a large part subconsicous, feeling betrayed when dakota left over the s1-2 timeskip. likewise how dakota felt betrayed over the bino and mark thing / mal amulet / belltech, etc. etc. but they stick together. no matter what they go through they get out of it, and they get out of it together.

so. okay apologies for taking so long to say so little. essentially what i like most about dakota and vyncent's friendship is that duality of relying on each other both out of necessity and because they're the only ones who really get each other, and also having the energy of like. "hey bro how many slices of pizza can i fit in my mouth at once. hey bro bet you cant backflip off of this building. hey bro let's do a karaoke duet of breaking free from high school musical"

as vyncent himself said in late season 2. they're brothers. (falls over and sobs)

[sapphicautistic]

my partner's family is 100% how i'm going to get covid

[spacedlexi]

it honestly frustrates me when i see people reduce the ericsons cast down to "just some teens in the woods" acting like theyre no different than any other group of lone teenagers from other existing properties and treating them like an overused trope

it is sooo important to acknowledge the "troubled youth" aspect of the whole equation. theyre not just some random teens in the woods clem stumbles across. these kids were abandoned by their families for their various "difficulties" and fucked up by The System before the outbreak even began. and then once zombies started roaming the streets their familes never came back for them and the adults that were in charge of taking care of them just left them there to rot in that old boarding school (except for ms martin who was like their lee 🥺 the only person who ever saw them as the scared traumatized kids they were and died protecting them)

the whole aspect of them already being fucked up by the adults that controlled their lives is like.....kind of important when discussing the whole "delta is stealing kids to force them to fight in a war they have no real part in and want nothing to do with" aspect of the season. and its important when comparing them to clem and her journey of also suffering at the hands of the adults around her forcing her to become self reliant. AND its important when discussing the "just trying to build a safe home (and future) worth fighting for in this world that wants them dead" aspect of the season as well

these kids were forced to come together to survive. and a Lot of them didnt... theyre the only family they have left and you can tell that even when they argue with each other theyre still a close knit group who looks out for each other. theyre a Real family before clem even gets there (and its why what really happened with the twins and brody and marlon hits them all so especially hard)

all of this is what REALLY makes ericsons such a perfect home for clem. its a Real community of her True peers. theyre not Just teens. they mightve had a layer of safety clem never had by at least having walls to keep them safe. and having the benefit of the school being hard to find. its the only reason theyre still alive when clem shows up. but theyre also some of the only people who can Truly understand where clem and aj are coming from. and its why it hurts so much when they vote to kick them out. but its also partially why she merges back into the fold so easily when she returns. plus the fact that shes Really the only one who has any idea what shes doing. shes their rock and she makes them feel safe because underneath it all theyre still just those scared traumatized kids ("EVERYONE is scared, clem..." vi was Definitely including herself in that 'everyone'), and on some level, so is clem

they saved clementines life. and she saved theirs. "the school was supposed to help them with their trauma, now they help each other" its about the LOVE the COMMUNITY the SUPPORT!!!! and thats the shit that makes good zombie media honestly 👌

[medicinemane]

I don't know... horrible things happen all around the world and it's not a competition

Atrocities are committed against multiple groups in multiple parts of the world at the exact same moment, and none of them erase each other. They all matter, all the people in this world who are being brutalized matter. There shouldn't be any line you draw where one group doesn't actually matter as much as another

You're welcome to prioritize your energy towards helping one group or another, but what's not ok is invalidating or dismissing people who are actively being harmed

Same goes for trying to figure out which social group has things worst (and lets be honest, always using a US lens)

Like... maybe the important thing is to prop each other up and help everyone get on their own feet rather than trying to... pick fights about if physical disabilities or mental illness are less respected (I'm trying to pick a more absurd example but sadly I've seen exactly that argument happen before). Maybe it doesn't really matter and what matters is helping who we can when we can

I'm tired of it, I'm just fucking tired of it. Support people, champion them when the world is just brutalizing them, but you don't need to throw a single other person under the bus to do that

Which seems to be an absolutely impossible lesson for people to learn

[ladyseidr]

vanessa headcanons / portrayal notes but i'm too lazy to make her headcanon banner or even write coherent thoughts so you just get a bullet point list:

definitely a reluctant follower but as things progress she gets more. . . attached might be a strong word, but she stops hating glitch so much. this does not last once she escapes him obv

like it's literally: oh funny rabbit guy but this is a glitch i need to figure out -> okay i hate his vibe -> get out of my head i hate you -> i might as well learn to live with you -> i've completely isolated myself from all friends except you so i guess that makes you. . . almost a friend -> post-game deeply traumatizing by the violating of like. literally having her autonomy taken away from her

still carries deep guilt and resentment for the murders during moments where she's fighting back / he's not in control at all

vanessa is the only fucking character in fn.af who would genuinely seek therapy after every thing and i think she should get an award for that

researches the franchise + william af.ton in a lot of detail when The Hell Begins and is horrified but also has to deal with glitch being very fond of his very dead creator

basically, not in the suit: glitch is like an annoying little voice in her head who she has to stop herself from arguing out loud with in the supermarket

in the suit: he's like. not Literally in control but heavily, heavily, heavily influences her thoughts and actions. can make her think almost anything is the right decision

( okay it's not as simple as "in the suit" and "out of the suit," but you catch my drift. she can absolutely "come out of it" while wearing the suit, and she can def be under his control while not )

i said it before but: scene girl in high school. like, she has rainbow extensions when not under glitch's control, of course she was a scene girl

genuinely loves the glamr.ocks, despite everything

generally i don't want to go with her owning / being in complete charge of the pizza.plex because that's silly to me, but i don't have an alternative, esp because like who would it be??? i just shrug.

genuinely concerned abt gregory or any other kid who gets in, esp because she Knows What's Going On. she literally knows that she's a threat herself.

favorite animals? cats and horses

took the help wa.nted job because, like. she needed the money + she's absolutely a gamer so it seemed fun. especially because she had never played VR before

doesn't have a favorite color and will argue if you try to get her to pick. definitely enjoys bright colors, though

absolutely thought fazb.ear entertainment was full of shit from the start, but she wasn't actually that familiar with the history, so

literally will adopt gregory post-game. tries to act kind of like a big sister but never had any siblings so she's incredibly lost fdhskfashfjdlsah

introvert, but enjoys having a small, close group of friends. she ghosts them during the glitch stuff, but the ones that matter are there for her when she gets back ( and def understand when she. . . kinda explains what was going on )

although "i adopted a kid" "you w h a t " FDHFKDSHJFHS

has absolutely nothing to do with her parents, for valid reasons

completely traumatized post-game to the point that she questions whether her own thoughts are "really" hers. she seriously doubts her own sanity at times, is often scared she didn't "actually" get rid of glitch, and questions her ability ( and worthiness, given her actions under brainwashing ) to take care of herself, much less gregory

like i mention on her page, i'm open to writing any ending and don't treat one as canon on this blog. however, it should be noted that i'm not a fan of the burnt.rap ending ( fully biased by the fact that i don't like burnt.rap's existence ). that's not to say i'm not willing to write it, but i'm prob not interested in writing directly with burnt.rap himself

as also mentioned on her page, she's a lesbian, so there won't be any shipping with her and glitch or william ( or any man lmao ). if glitch still wants to be weird, that's on him, but she won't be receptive period.

loves creative stuff!! is an artist ( esp with pencils or digital, but can paint a bit ), enjoys decorating her apartment, and adores dressing up in pretty clothes!

also genuinely enjoys programming. yes, it is soured for her post-game.

will self-sabotage herself even pre-game ( eating nothing but takeout, not getting outside enough, isolating, etc ). therapy helps post-game.

[reflectionsofgalaxies]

gonna do the stupid thing for my stupid mental health