#it makes me feel very 2016
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ok my HC is dee has trich. she like 100% has trich. and it started out as the kind where u like eat the hair too so as a kid she gets a hairball in her stomach and dennis NEVERRRR lets her live it down and so she starts pulling in more discreet places and like tweezing her leg hair off instead of just shaving it….. yeah
#hair pulling tw#tw#idk#is this gross#or do i just have shame#no u guys talk abt dennis sucking toes with a tail buttplug every day why should i have shame#sorry i feel embarrassed abt projecting my diagnoses onto characters#it makes me feel very 2016#even tho when other ppl do this im like wow…. the richness. the texture.. the BREADTH of this#but also i think this HC goes with her general control issues LOL#like it just makes sense to me that shed have some compulsion like this that would spiral out of control#and also itd sorta be like an extension of the reynolds hair thing that started with frank….threads connected
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Wait have you ever drawn macavity?? If you're still taking requests then could you maybe do him? :0
look at this evil little man
#inspired by his 2016 revival design bc i really like that him and tugger kind of parallel each other#makes me think that macavity was much like tugger when he was part of the jellicles#my own hc is that tugger didn't really know him#but munk noticed that he has grown to behave so much like him#there's this fear in the back of his mind that tugger will end up like macavity too#ANYWAY.#sorry this is a lil scribbly idk haven't been feeling very creative today :-(#cats the musical#cats musical#my art#macavity#macavity the mystery cat#cats 2016
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Can somebody tell me how you write a good cover letter and resume for a job you're maybe-maybe-not qualified for
#every time i write a cover letter i feel like i lose another year of my life they are AGONIZING#and i have recycled them in pieces but whatever im doing isnt working#part of the problem is that my resume is all over the place#most of my work is in the service industry#even my theatre jobs have all been front of house except for one in 2016#but i need an office job or something where i can sit down. and it can't be the job i have right now#first of all it MUST pay better. it MUST#very hard not to with how much im making rn#but second of all (and more importantly for my mental health) it has to be something im not ethically opposed to#my current job makes me want to crawl out of my skin. i know why i took it but i also know i cant keep it
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spent the first hour and change at work deleting some old files and am having a grand ol time laughing at myself for not realizing i was a lesbian sooner
#vulnerable tag rambles ahead please be kind abt them i didnt intent to ramble this much but i dont wanna delete it eitehr#me to every single man i have ever dated after 6mo-1y: yeah hey this really isnt working out i dont really know why but i really hate mysel#and i dont want to blame you because i dont think you did anything inherently wrong here; i think this is something about me but i need#space to figure out why im feeling this way [every single one reacted by telling me No i wasnt allowed to leave btw]#i hold very complex feelings about these relationships esp bc of them ending in very violent/chaotic ways most of the time#but its interesting to look back at it all and realize ive left every man for the same reason (which is that ive hated myself Every Single#Time ive dated a man) and its funny bc i recognized the self hate pretty early on w/ cishet men but when it came to queer men it was#much more confusing (esp w/ nto knowing Any lesbians at that point in my life). im so happy im a lesbian tbh#i have a lot of issues w/ the racism fatphobia and transmisogyny present in lesbian groups#and also coming out as a lesbian really truly saved my life. before i met my wife i was quite literally in a 3yr abusive relationship that#definitely would have died in if i hadnt realzied i was a lesbian and ran from him#its also weird seeing liek the hard evidence of the things that happened to me btween 2016-2020 tbh#cause that was such a bad time of my life. i truly dont know how i survived it but im so glad i did#like the three major relationships in my life b4 meeting my wife was: guy who was in college when i was in HS who stalked me when i left;#guy who was a year younger than me who cheated on me the entire time while telling me he was being victimized (he wasnt; this was very mess#guy who saw the very messy toxic ldr i was in and helped me dump my ex then decided that meant we were in a relationship [insert 3 yrs here#and admittedly all 3 years with him werent the same level of abusive but it was definitely unhealthy from the start considering I Didnt Kno#we were together until he wanted to celebrate vday and got mad i didnt know our anniversary - and like this isnt including the other stuff#that happened between those Relatonships[tm] (cause ive never been monogamous; these were just the Major Relationships)#like i genuinely think if i hadnt come out i'd be dead rn given just how dangerous my relationships were/continued getting#i am also so tired now that ive seen all this cause like. fuck i can barely believe it and i not only lived it but have PTSD about it#i should write about my life sometime. i feel like it'd be cathartic to try and make a tangible timeline and stories from the years ang stu#anyway yeah. be nice about the tag rambles. dont message me with pity or curiosity or anything about this. i dont usually talk abt this stu#publicly bc i hate the ways ppl start tryign to baby me when they realize my life has been extremely fucked up until only a few years ago#n im still working on accepting kindness from others bc of [insert life traumas here] but its a long process so pls respect my need for jus#being heard rn w/o too much pressure< 3 (but ig if u do read this can u like it cause i feel a little crazy seeing all the evidence of the#stuff i experienced now also cause fuck ik logically it was but also i cant believe it was all real still yk)
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i keep finding reminders of how i used to act/type a few years ago and i shrivel up. and die.
#i am so so so glad that i'm still on friendly terms with a lot of you guys because i am not a strong enough person#if i was interacting with someone like my past self i think i'd keep a long distance before gently closing the door#drags my hands down my face. the masking was so much. too much.#i stumbled across drawings from 2016 or so and a lot of it was based on memes my friend* at the time liked#which i vividly recall thinking 'this seems really weird. but i think it'll make them laugh!' which. in fairness. it did#but i'm just not & have never been the sort of person who is wholly comfortable acting like that anyway#it always felt off. but i'd lean into it because it's all i really knew people expected of me & i was scared of making a jarring change#which. in a sense. losing my ''best friend*'' & primary discord server at the time somewhat helped w that transition period#into. well. what i am today!#i like to think i'm still silly enough but in a more authentic way to myself & my own humor...#it feels a lot more real - the ways in which i put myself out there. i don't have the weight of feeling like i 'must' close myself off#i get to be open. whether it's here or among friends. i feel more genuine and - ironically - alive; for better and for worse i suppose#jestersvaguely#*the same person. not very good for a multitude of reasons + they were twice my age at the time#which isn't inherently a bad thing to be clear. but combined w a lot of behavior they facilitated + topics of conversation it's... well.#but i digress#i'm glad that things have improved - generally speaking :]
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screaming tearing my hair out i wish the writing style of isat was different <- (lockscreen background is currently siffrin)
#i know i have people here who really like it please do not get my opinion here the wrong way#i have grown to really like it but i just. the style of writing is not for me most of the time#it’s just. ughhh#i feel like i like it because i like act 5 and also siffrin#and the writing does have its standout moments#but it also feels very… 2016 tumblry often and that is just Not For Me. personally. in my opinion#to be fair i have comparatively not played many games and the ones i have had all had excellent writing#utdr hollow knight pentiment rdr2 etc et cetera#so i am a bit spoiled for that#but i am not trying to be disparaging. i say ‘’i wish it was better’’ with love in my heart because it did make me feel. seen.#god’s most conflicted soldier about this#the writing itself as in story and everything is good. its just the Style at times#i do not know if this makes sense#i think for example i did not find the ‘’nya’’ comments very funny or endearing#BUT then the way for example the one thing being called mal du pays??? that was good#really good even. very loaded. lots to think about (just using these two things as examples)#oh i do like odile a lot too
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I put 30 tags on that dear evan hansen post. for the love of god don't click to expand the tags I'm so fucking sorry I just hate that awful fucking show so fucking much. oh fuck I've done it again in the tags here oh god
#theo.txt#I just realized more fucked up bullshit in the show while I was typing is all#and then wasted like an hour checking lyrics to make sure I wasn't misreading#no they do have zoe immediately backtrack her assertion that she won't let her brother's death change her view of their relationship (bad)#even though death and especially suicide often leads to valorization of the deceased#but all it takes is Evan's little connor pov song about all the things he (connor(evan)) noticed about her.#which are all very cute and extremely romantically coded.#and she takes this at face value! despite many of the listed traits being extremely odd things for a sibling to notice!#especially one she had a volatile to abusive relationship with!!! what the fuck!!!!#like ig you could argue. she's hoping he did secretly care and Evan's a new perspective that's not her parents#or on a meta level it's arguing that teens acting violently or abusively often lack other emotional and communicative outlets#however. the song is not good enough to be attempting either </3#textually it seems like it's trying to do the former in that at no point does zoe see through Evan's premise and responds entirely genuinely#however. booo hiss that makes no sense evan is doing a horrible job of hiding his crush#and zoe either thinking connor was noticing her sexually or just not picking up on it?? for the sake of the duet?? either is bad.#in the former that only gives her more reason to shut off from him and from evan#and the latter just makes her and the writing worse lmfao#Alternatively if we're playing that connor was actually really sweet like evan and she (or we) could and should believe he'd say this#and he didn't know how to express his feelings (even these kind soft observant ones) except through violence#targeted at the objects of those feelings nonetheless!!!!! he cared for zoe but didn't know how to show it and so he harmed her!!!!#and therefore not only should we empathize with him but she should forgive him and immediately relinquish her anger after his death#because he was just so misunderstood and he cared :( never mind her experience directly affected by his actions#shit piss fuck take on humanizing people who abuse or do other violent acts. Dylan klebold apologia ass song#I'm not even like. God I'm all for trying to understand why people engage in destructive behaviors for the purpose of preventing them!#I'm for recognizing the personhood of every human including those who do terrible things. I think we have to.#NOT LIKE THIS!!!!!!!!!#god. again. everyone who talked abt this show saving teen mental health owes me money for my 2016 experiences.#also they should have to watch next to normal.
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Sometimes I just look at Isabeau and just know that if isat came out and I got into it when I was like 16 he would be my favorite character and I would've gone absolutely buck wild over this man and feel like he was laser targeting me. But alas Odile has a grip of steel on me rn due to her virtue of being a middle aged woman
#rat rambles#stars posting#I feel like the biggest change in my taste in characters as the years have gone by is Im now far more biased towards old ppl lol#although tbf I was also the one person in 2016 who actually liked asgore so maybe Ive always liked parhetic old ppl#but yeah the reason isa is past me bait is because hes an exploration and subversion of the sort of tropes I Hated as a kid#and I still dont like them so isa still appeals to me its just not as much as he would have to a younger me#I do genuinely love all the party very dearly tho theyre all soooo good#I think my favorite part of isabeau is how like. of everyone we get to see the least facets of him but like in a very good way#this is a man who hides and bottles shit hes so fun to rotate#his self image is so carefully controlled compared to everyone else which makes him an incredibly interesting character to analyze#and I love that despite him seeming like the most emotionally stable person here on the surface he still clearly has like. hashtag issues.#like he's in that beautiful zone where its so so fun imagining what it would look like to truly break him#<- normal things that normal ppl say. like me.#I may have my very light beef with alt looping aus as a concept but hes probably the most interesting alternate looper to me#also my light beef exclusively relates to king quest stuff which is why Im a big fan of duo looper aus with sif#but honestly. isa might be the only one that I genuinely think works better as a solo looper even with taking king quest into account#although bonnie comes close. I <3 looper bonnie I <3 seeing fictional children go through the horrors#I think theres a lot of fun to be had with any alt looper au tho I just am a huge king quest fan so I like it when my favorite elements of#it dont have to be handwaved#but yeah the real question is how would younger me feel about mirabelle#because on the one hand: acearo character#but on the other hand: I have always been a little hater abt romance so idk if younger me would rly be able to follow her character well#I wasnt exactly good at character analysis back then lol#except for the instances in which I was but I dont have that sort of faith in my younger self#yknow Im thinking abt my history of favorite characters now and I think me being one of few 2016 alphys enjoyers might have been a prophecy#she was my quote unquote third favorite but in reality she was second#I think she chara and peridot su teamed up to define my taste in fictional characters for the next several years#and somehow that lead to olivia becoming one of my favorite fictional characters of all time#I say somehow as if that isnt a very natural conclusion
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okay guys let's not shame people for being *checks notes* upset that a fascist dictator was elected. god damn let people have feelings. it's okay. bottling it up and "sucking it up and getting to work" doesn't like. help really. yeah there's a lot of work to be done but like.... you're allowed to have feelings. you're allowed to be scared. you're allowed to cry.
idk i remember thinking this in the last election too, that people were getting mad at people for celebrating also? and it's like it's okay that people have feelings. and trying to bottle those up or not feel them is not healthy or normal. i cried on and off all morning and then i dried my tears and went out on errands bc i needed to leave the house and it was very good for me to get out and do something and now i'm feeling a lot more clearheaded. i've had anxiety my entire life. fighting it doesn't help anything, honestly just makes it stronger. acknowledge your feelings. breathe through it. feel it. then move forward. that's it.
just. don't listen to anyone telling you not to feel it or that you can't or shouldn't be upset or scared or angry or whatever you're feeling. vent. let it out. THEN get to work.
#you can't pour from an empty cup#and yeah maybe i'm speaking from a place of emotions right now since it's just like one day#but like. yeah idk i just saw a very infantalizing post about this and it made me annoyed bc like#i've always been someone with big feelings. and yeah i've been shamed a lot for crying or for venting or for having meltdowns and breakdown#but like.right now? right NOW? is really not the time to be doing that y'all#i'm autistic and i'm an adult and i know how to handle myself and i will fucking cry if i fucking want to. don't infantalize me.#don't act like i'm just stupid or young or naive this is not my first election i voted in 2016 too#i know what's at stake and i'm scared. emotions do not make you weak or naive or childish!!!#win rambles
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girl help the sugakage brainworms are eating me alive noooooooo
#something something Suga teaching kageyama to be a better setter in the ways that oikawa never would#something something Kageyama being suga's favourite first year#UGH THEY MAKE ME FEEL SO ILL#i've been thinking abt a very particular scenario lately#something along the lines of suga serendipitously having time to watch one of kageyama's early adler's games#(post-2016 olympics. pre-adlers/jackals match)#and them running into one another and arranging a coffee date set to happen whenever suga has time#the first year of teaching kindergarten is god awful and kageyama finds that out very quickly when suga starts spilling the beans during#their date#ANYWAYS for the sake of Drama suga ends up missing his train back from tokyo to miyagi and ends up having to stay the night w kageyama o3o#on their way home suga stops by a liquor store to buy them some wine#because i love me a good Wine & Dine#kageyama cooks them dinner. suga pours their wine. kageyama ends up tipsy after One Glass. there's a smooch somewhere#OH YEAH i was also thinking about gender bending the shit out of this#fem!sugakage 4 life✌️#they r both so lesbian coded i'm sorry#if i ever get around to it you'll know!#otherwise it'll just live in my brain forever#and on this post... i guess.....#volleyball guys
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You know, normally I see an update; get excited about reading more of the story and seeing more of Hoshino's gorgeous art; am ever so slightly confused with some details while reading because updates are so sporadic and I haven't had the chance to go back and give everything a proper re-read; and, unfailingly, leave with a wistful longing for Lavi (12 years real-life time since we last saw him and counting ✌️). This has been the pattern for the last several years --
but
but
BUT
This? I never thought I'd see this. I never knew I needed this. Link's expression? His posture? The direction their relationship is developing in? The lighting??
I am 100% okay with Lavi not appearing in this chapter, actually.
#dgm spoilers#dgm#like. i'd have to go back and rewatch/reread but i feel like last time we saw link#he and allen had a very different dynamic to this????#allen himself was just very different the last time we saw him interact with people before#we went through that whole flashback spree#again idk for sure because dgm has taken a back seat in my hyperfixations to other fandoms and it's been so long#since i engaged with it properly but#it really feels like allen has grown a lot since the flashbacks started ;____;#ANYWAY the main thing is that i am absolutely obsessed with this panel#in a way i haven't been obsessed with a manga panel for A Very Long Time (it was probably Bleach so... 2016?? ^^;)#ALSO this made me realize that more people need to make use of nose pinching/nose booping!!#it's criminally underutilized as a gesture of play/bonding/affection/hand offering#between this chapter and catching up on k//ny plus i still have one m//ny episode to watch#it has been /such/ a good day#i am very pleased with my fictional intake today :D
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This being Wikipedia's picture of Jenson for the 2009 season is insane, every time I open the page, I'm like "my god Jenson please, put your tits away 🫣" ALSO ALSO IM CRYING, I checked the pic's descrip and it's literally: "A very fit Jense", so true!!!
#the best fireproofs frrrrr 🤤🤤#i check 2009 a lot and literally every time i have to take at least a few seconds to stare at this picture#every single time im like....my god jense...#whoever picked this one for it props to you#wikipedia's pictures for racers is one of those things i feel incredibly specific over(if that makes sense?)#the thing that bothers me so much is itll be the page for like 2018 and then the pic of the driver is from before that season#tho the worst is when its a pic of them not even in the correct team 😡#if i could do anything in the world it would be to edit all the season pages with proper pics#these should generally be a headshot from the proper year imo#the year thing really bothers me honestly bcs i feel like it should be proper yr so you know what the driver from then actually looks like#example: why does lewis have the same pic for 2016-2021 but 2018 randomly has a different one??#AND WHY IS CHECO'S PIC FOR 2021 FROM 2019 WHEN HE WAS IN RACING POINT#^ its like 'sergio perez driving for rbr' then why tf is he wearing racing point gear..........#another ex. max's 2023 pic is from 2017 broooooo it makes him look so young#i just think it gives a really inaccurate view of the season#if im looking at the wiki page for 2023 i wanna know what the wdc leader looks like now...not what he looked like 6 years ago....#anyways that being said im fine with this one particularly bcs its accurate and also very 😳#catie.rambling.txt#jenson button
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For that post I just reblogged:
So I had Orcelito in the first tournament. And I just submitted Astel Paschalis, the main character of the manga Tel Cel by Yugyouji Tama (the same mangaka as +C: Sword and Cornett that Orcelito is from)
Got curious. Double checked my urls.
.... I've been sitting on the canon url of that manga's protagonist's name for about 8 years now 😅😅😅
If that doesn't show how obscure he is, I don't know what else would.
#speculation nation#sorry to any potential yugyouji tama fans out there for hogging not one but TWO canon main character name urls#i really dont think it's a huge problem tho. considering next to no one knows this fucking character lmao. oh well.#also dont worry about the middle one. that's an old url i had back in 2016 (after the da2 character)#and it will just point back to this blog. archived the url to leave a trail of urls (as i always do)#im not a massive url hoarder. just a handful of my old urls and a handful of obscure things like this.#it does make me feel a little bad tho maybe 😅 whoopsie#maybe i should use this sideblog to reblog the posts Astel is in. if he gets in.#OMG since he's an A name he'd appear so much faster than Orcelito did!!! i was waiting for MONTHS for orcelito!!!!#rly hoping he's accepted for that tournament 🥺🥺🥺 id enjoy that very much.
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Thanks to the new rarity labels it's now easier to learn values for making fair trades! Everyone who already knew how to make fair trades has to relearn everything tho get fucked losers
#/t /lh#its me im losers#im guessing the people who really understand trading wont be struggling to much#but i barely understand and i feel like illl be relearning from scratch :/#but i do think itll be easier to learn this time around cause the rarity labels will make it clearer#side note ALL the 2016 space event robot rats are very rare now#idk if this is gonna make it easier or harder to trade for now#ppl were treating that green rat like gold#but maybe theyll stop now that all thee robot rats are the same?#smoothie posts#chicken smoothie#swearing cw
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Well ain't that just a peach
Same economy as Europe in... let this sink in... the 18th century... that's the 1700's. But yes, continue to tell me capitalism is da whey.
#anti capitalism#anti capitalism meme#political meme#usa poltics#memes#not funny#very sad#lol#fml#the rich get richer while we die to make them that way#i dont think step over everyone and anyone to get to the top is disgusting 😒#the 1%#i fucking hate when people say “capitalism rocks”#then complain they cant pay rent because its too high#🫠#ffs#this chart#chart comparison between usa in 2016 and europe in the 1700s#canada is really no different#so we feel it too#capitalism sucks#dont come at me#you ahould be in jail for rushing the capitol building ya idiot#we need to drop this capitalism bullshit
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Got a comment on a fic for the first time in months. Really old fic too.
Genuinely baffled that people still read stuff that old.
#c*rny posts#i havent written since the pandemic started but have been thinking about getting back into it#ngl the comment definitely gave me extra motivation#fic was from 2016#not very good. definitely not popular.#baffled as to how this person even found it#ive just realized that ive been writing fanfic on and off for 17 years#that is. uh. something#(you would think i would have gotten better at it. i did not. lmao. jk.) (definitely feels like im better at editing than i am at writing)#(which kind of makes me sad)#(brain not work well with creativity)
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