#it literally doesn't get any better lol and i've tried pretty much everything at this point

[chuuzushies]

.

[humblefryingpan]

The "Amy likes spiders" poem in doki doki literature club (Natsuki's second poem) just makes me think of being closeted with internalized homophobia and I think it works really well for her

There's the poem if you haven't seen it!

(This is just me analyzing the poem and it's probably my longest post yet. I've been overanalyzing all the poems but this is the only one I've typed out atm lol)

It specifically makes me think of four things - Yuri liking different things and her disliking her for it, Natsuki being so far in the closet that she'll take any excuse to avoid the pretty girl™, Natsuki's self projection onto "Amy" and most importantly internalized homophobia, like I said earlier

It generally makes me think natsuri but I'll get to that later. So if we go from the internalized homophobia + closeted perspective (more like raised homophobic and doesn't know she's gay but ykwim), it reads as "a girl I know is a lesbian and Im meant to hate her for it. She's pretty and she makes me feel things but I can't be friends with her because she's a lesbian"

'The narrator' (Natsuki) heard a rumor that a girl, "Amy" (the lesbian), apparently likes 'spiders' (girls) and is repulsed. And that's why she isn't friends with her.

"Amy" sings the narrator's favorite love song, her voice is cute and it's making her heart pound. But she still likes 'spiders', so she can't be her friend.

She hurts her leg and "Amy" helped her get to the nurse. She tried to avoid touching her because her hands might be gross due to touching 'spiders', so she still can't be her friend.

"Amy" is very popular, but "she probably talks about spiders" (being gay). "What if her friends start to like spiders too?" (This entire verse rlly speaks for itself)

The next verse is shortest and even more repetitive than the rest of the poem (to emphasize her point) "it doesn't matter if she has other hobbies, it doesn't matter is she keeps it private, it doesn't matter if it doesn't hurt anyone" because to the narrator - she can't be "Amy's" friend, no matter how bad she wants to, because she's always going to be a 'spider lover' (lesbian) and she won't be able to ignore that.

And then the final nail to seal shut the door to the closet - "it's gross, she's gross, the world is better off without spider lovers. And I'm gonna tell everyone" because she needs everyone to know she hates 'spider lovers' to make sure no one knows she is also one. It's so gross because she was taught it was and now she can't stop thinking it's gross, no matter how nice/pretty/kind "Amy" is.

Onto the natsuri part so if you don't like that ship feel free to skip the rest of this (if you're still here lol)

Yuri and Natsuki like such different things (creepy and complex vs cute and simple) and they reach the point where they've argued so much that Natsuki doesn't want to admit she doesn't dislike Yuri. Even if she likes her poems, she'd never tell her because she feels like she can't at this point.

Natsuki couldn't see past their differences for a while, when she finally does, she's too embarrassed to apologize and too uncomfortable to befriend her without apologizing.

Nearly every verse of the poem will talk about how great the girl is. How she has a cute voice, she helped her, she has lots of friends, she makes her heart pound. But every verse she will still come back to "but she likes spiders. That's why I'm not friends with her". It feels like her gradually warming up to Yuri but still reminding herself that she can't be her friend, they're too different, Yuri likes creepy things (Yuri probably does like spiders so that's a bit more literal but it's also that spiders seem to symbolise everything she likes that Natsuki doesn't) and she couldn't be friends with someone so different.

And lastly, Natsuki's self projection (this is what the meaning is said to be in-game), meaning "Amy" is Natsuki herself. Natsuki likes manga and her friends won't believe it counts as literature. Her manga is the spider in this interpretation, she doesn't want people to judge her based on what she likes. She's had to be so defensive about what she likes, she may even judge herself for liking it at this point. She doesn't want people to judge people by their interests.

I keep seeing people say that Amy is a real person but that's one of the only interpretations that makes no sense to me. Because Natsuki may be a bit judgemental but even she wouldn't make an entire poem about disliking her classmate's love of spiders. She said herself that anyone that agrees with the narrator in the poem is a bad person. It's far more likely that "Amy" is a made up idea, she's barely even shown as a person. She's seemingly meant to be symbolic of Natsuki's flaws and insecurities, whatever you perceive those insecurities to be.

Portraying Amy as an actual person kinda cheapens the poem, at least in my opinion, because she was talking about how people should be given a chance no matter what (or who) they like and if Amy was a person it wouldn't make sense

[danieyells]

hi! any chance you'd be able to post some of kaito's voicelines? I would love to see them <33

Our wanna-be knight and pathetic little best friend! He's just such a good boy lol. . .once again, another one who just wants to go back to a normal life, poor thing. Kaito's very much your vanilla, sweet boyfriend character with no frills attached, aside from his cowardice and his gambling habit of course. And his terrible aim. . . .

Copying all of them over isn't hard now that I've done it twice. Let's do it again for Kaito!

Hello: (the first time the game is opened after that character is set as home screen NPC. Only happens once per day, unless the character is switched out and back.)

"{PC}! Over here! Hiya!"

You've Got Mail: (whenever there's something in the inbox, usually Arena rewards)

"Hey, new message. Better check it out, yeah? Or are you the type who's got like a ton of of unread inbox messages?"

. . .shut up /absolutely that type (and a sincere apology to literally everyone i know for that my adhd doesn't let me read and respond to their messages--)

Default: (requires no affinity, has no time constraints)

"God, please don't make me go on any more missions... It's not like me being there is any help to anyone anyway..."

"Oh yeah, have you been on WickHive yet? Someone leaked next month's cafeteria menu! Oh wait... I-I already told you that, didn't I?!"

"Damn it... I could've taken {PC} to lunch with that money! God, why am I such a moron?!"

"Ask me anything you want to know! I'm pretty savvy when it comes to Darkwick!"

honestly the fact that he's a second year who doesn't wanna be here and doesn't wanna be doing all of this but he still knows like everything about the school is also kinda sus to me. . .surely he'd divest himself from as much of darkwick as possible if he didn't care

"Urgh... Limited time only, you are not my friend... Huh? Oh, I'm on TikTok. I really want this, but I'm pretty broke this month..."

Affinity 1: (between 5am and 11am)

"Ahem... Testing, testing... Morning! Heh, nailed it... Ack! How long've you been there, {PC}?!"

Affinity 2: (between 11am and 4pm)

"Phew, should be safe here... EEEEEEEEEEK! Oh thank god, it's just a cat... I thought he found me..."

romeo oh romeo didn't you get into enough shit for this romeo? just make sure it's not Romeo cat. Because I'm sure it'll tell him somehow--

Affinity 3: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"Shit, it's Luca… Judging by the outfit he must be going to train. I better bail before he tries to rope me in too…"

Affinity 4: (between 8pm and 5am)

"Eeeek?! Oh, it's just you... Geez, you almost gave me a heart attack!"

i know romeo is constantly on his ass, and I relate to the feeling of being scared the people you owe money will appear out of nowhere and get you, but. . .he's so jumpy lol

Affinity 5: (between 8pm and 5am)

"Ugh, Romeo's texting me... Not gonna open that..."

Affinity 6: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"So your father runs a company, huh? Who the hell leads with that?! This is why I hate talking to Frostheimers..."

so the wording here is wonky because he's quoting a Frostheimer, but there's no visual indication that he's quoting them. But lore drop! Kaito's father runs a company! But I thought he wasn't well off. . .? Maybe his parents are separated or his father doesn't spend any of their money on him. . .or the company isn't doing well. . .or gambling addiction runs in his family lol. . . .

Affinity 7: (between 11am and 4pm)

"Argh, I want junk food! And I want to try all the new snack flavors!!"

my boy is so relateable--

Affinity 8: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"All right, time to man up and bite the bullet... Nope, absolutely not, can't do it!"

Affinity 9: (between 8pm and 5am)

"How is Jin's skin so perfect? Fucking rich kids and their stupidly expensive fancy-ass toner!!!"

kaito really looking at jin like OH NO HE'S HOT

Affinity 10: (between 10pm and midnight)

"(yawn) Guess I'll go brush my teeth..."

Affinity 11: (between 5am and 11am)

"Hey {PC}, you seem different somehow today. Did you change something? Or am I just imagining things?!"

Affinity 12: (between 11am and 4pm)

"Noooo why does Tohma want to see me...? No way it's about something good! Could you come with me, {PC}?!"

Affinity 13: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"Crap, I fell asleep in class so I don't know what our homework is... Help me, {PC}!"

Affinity 14: (between 5am and 11am)

"(yawn) Man, my bed's like a freaking marshmallow. I can never get any good sleep on that thing..."

lol the Frostheim beds are too comfortable lolol I NEED A FIRMER BED TOO KAITO I GET IT.

Affinity 15: (between 5am and 11am)

"Huh? Oh, my pendant! You're always wearing it? Does that mean you've actually been paying attention to me?!"

once again the wording here is wonk because it makes it sound like the pc is always wearing Kaito's pendant. I'm pretty sure he's quoting the pc, who's commented that "you're always wearing it". It would read better as something like "You noticed I'm always wearing it?"

Affinity 16: (between 11am and 4pm)

"Hey {PC}, how 'bout we grab a bite?! I've got tons to splurge in winn... er, earnings, so it's all on me! Get whatever you want!"

your gambling addiction is really and truly going to get you in trouble. disregard that i play a gacha game.

Affinity 17: (between 10pm and midnight)

"...Huh?! Man, nearly fell sleep without putting my phone on the charger... 5%, that would've sucked tomorrow..."

Affinity 18: (between 8pm and 5am)

"Ha ha ha! Have you seen this yet?! It's all over TikTok. Ah man, it's killing me..."

Affinity 19: (between 10pm and midnight)

"Whoa, when did it get so late?! Sorry {PC}, I didn't mean to keep you up... What? You're still good?"

Affinity 20: (between 5am and 11am)

"Morning! Hey, guess what? Luca's busy after class, so how about we hit up the diner? It's been ages!"

do you. . .do you really wanna go there. . .i mean the drinks seem to be fine but according to sho they can't make good food at all. . . .

Affinity 21: (between 11am and 4pm)

"Sorry, I gotta stay after class today... (sniffle) This sucks, I really wanted to walk home with you..."

aw buddy. . .they could wait for you or come pick you up after your remedial lesson. . .!

Affinity 22: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"Hey I'm really sorry but do you mind if we stop by the campus store after class? I'm almost out of granulated sugar."

Affinity 23: (between 8pm and 5am)

"Hey, do you like stars? Oh, um, I was just wondering 'cause there's this place where you can see them really well, so I thought maybe you'd want to go some time..."

he's overcoming his fears and being honest with himself and how he speaks and just. . .asking honestly, no bravado, no act. do it scared, kaito. do it scared, do it awkward, do it sure you're going to fail. as long as you do it. proud of you!

Affinity 24: (between 10pm and midnight)

"Sure is dark. Reminds me of the closet where we first met. Remember?"

Affinity 25(max): (no time constraints)

"I know I'm weak, and a coward. But I really do want to become your knight in shining armor, {PC}."

I love how comfortable and honest he starts to get as his affinity goes up. Still shy here and there, still scared, but he's not as jumpy and he starts treating you like a real friend. laughs with you about stuff, talks a little about hobbies and struggles. doesn't try and look cool for you. and then the honesty--i'm a weak coward, but i wanna be better for you. i wanna spend time with you. just!!! he grows!!! he realizes you like him for who he is and how he is, even if that's a weak coward--and that that's exactly what he wants! and it's okay for him to be that way because you won't be put off by it, even if it's something he'd like to grow from so he can be better for you--but he wants to be better for you as himself and--idk. i have feelings about characterization lol.

Spring: (March-May) (between 5am and 11am)

"(yawn) Man, I wanna sleep, but I can't fail, so I gotta show up for class... Oh! I have Professor Nicolas next! Naptime."

does that mean you're good in anomalous medicine class or. . . .

(between 11am and 4pm)

"Grr! All those girls in the hall were looking at Luca! I'm so pissed off now I'm not even sleepy anymore!"

(between 4pm and 8pm)

"It's finally warm out again, so I really want to go do something fun... Wish I could get an R&R permit..."

well maybe if you stopped sleeping in class and did good in class or went on a mission or something. . . . . .

(between 8pm and 5am)

"Mheheh... {PC}... You've got a petal in your hair... Zzz..."

Summer: (June-August) (between 5am and 11am)

"Ugh, it's too hot to go outside... But I can sense a coming-of-age event on the horizon... All right, here I come!"

obligatory beach event? 👀

(between 11am and 4pm)

"Can't believe Professor Hyde still wears that blindfold in summer. Pfft, I bet it's really sweaty under— Eeeek! S-Sir?!"

(between 4pm and 8pm)

"Hey {PC}, are you free after this? I was thinking of inviting Luca to let off some fireworks! I want to show him how we do summer here in Japan."

(between 8pm and 5am)

"I can't believe I get to spend the whole summer hanging out with you {PC}... (sniffle) Homework? Uh y-yeah, I finished it already..."

Autumn: (September-November) (between 5am and 11am)

"Is it just me, or is it really cold today?! Guess I better get my coat out soon..."

(between 11am and 4pm)

"Have you had the chestnut rice from the cafeteria yet? They made it way too fancy. It's supposed to be comfort food..."

(between 4pm and 8pm)

"Tohma's always reading something. Maybe I should too... All right, let's go with this! 10 Ways To Become Popular Overnight!"

well. . .it's something to read. . .never a bad idea to read.

(between 8pm and 5am)

"Apparently the moon is the most beautiful in fall since the air gets clearer. Want to go take a look?"

Winter: (December-February) (between 5am and 11am)

"It's freezing out there! It's freezing in here! Frostheim sucks!!"

this makes me wonder what the warmest dorm is on average. . .probably jabberwock as long as towa's in a good mood? (or maybe warm jabberwock winters mean towa's in a bad mood. . .?)

(between 11am and 4pm)

"The cold can go to hell, but I guess there's outfits you can only wear this time of year..."

you can wear whatever you want whenever you want if you're brave enough. but this is kaito and he's not very brave. and it's also not very smart to wear winterwear in the summer.

(between 4pm and 8pm)

"I really want to go to Starbucks for the new winter drink! But I really really don't want to go on any missions!! Guess I'll never get to try it."

(between 8pm and 5am)

"Gram... No... No more mandarins... ...Huh?! Oh, it was just a dream... I haven't had a mandarin for ages..."

'gram' in this case is 'grandma' in case you couldn't figure it out haha and the mandarin(mikan)'s used to represent health and longevity and a long prosperous bloodline or something like that for new years. So i assume his grandmother would feed him a lot of mandarins every winter lolol

His birthday: (December 11th)

"Why did Jin, Tohma, and Luca give me all this high-end stuff?! It's freaking me out!! Thank you!?!?"

EVEN JIN AND TOHMA GAVE HIM GIFTS. . .FROSTHEIM FAM IS REAL. . . .

Your birthday:

"Happy birthday, {PC}! We'll make this the best one— Hey, give those back! Those are the cue cards I made yesterday!!"

ksjfkhesbfjh he made himself cue cards to give you a birthday speech with as little stuttering as possible. . . .

New Years: (January 1st)

"Happy New Year! Let's make it a good one! S-So hey, if, er, if you'd like, c-could we, um... could we make our first shrine visit together?"

Valentine's Day: (February 14th)

"C'mon Kaito, deep breaths. Girls aren't into guys with no chill. So stay cool... Stay— Are those chocolates for me?! I'll take them to my grave!"

everyone loves an enthusiastic boy lol

White Day: (March 14th)

"Do you like the cookies I made? Come on, no way they're that good, heh heh... Heh heh heh... Here, take them all!!"

god i bet he makes really good sweets too. like i bet he puts so much love and good spirit into them lolol

April Fool's Day: (April 1st)

"I'd never lie to a girl. Ah! That's not a lie, I swear! {PC}? Are you listening?!"

BAD THING TO SAY ON APRIL FOOL'S ABORT MISSION

Halloween: (October 31st)

"Trick or treat! See those carved pumpkins? I was actually the one who made them. What do you think?"

given his DIY skills i bet he's actually really good at carving too. i bet they look really good!

Christmas: (December 25th)

"Hey, uh, {PC}, do you, uh... Do you have any plans for Christmas? I'm actually totally free!"

Idle: (about 20 seconds without interacting with the game) (below 13 affinity)

"Huh? {PC}? Am I being annoying?! I'm sorry! You're probably busy, right?!"

(13 affinity and above)

"{PC} seems kind of busy... I know! I'll find a video that'll help take her mind off things!"

this one replace the first one after you hit a certain affinity, so it's cute to see that he eventually decides 'i'm not being annoying, they're just busy. i wanna help them' after he gets closer to you. . . .

Absent: (logging in for the first time in 2 or more days?)

"Ah...! Oh my god, you're back!! I'm so happy to see you!!!!  (sob) Please don't leave me again..."

he's so clingy. . .poor guy really missed you, considering you're one of the kindest and most normal people in Darkwick that he associates with. . . . also man 'please don't leave me again' with the whole loop theory stuff. . . .

I THINK I'VE SAID MOST OF MY THOUGHTS THROUGHOUT THIS BUT. He really is a sweetie. He really could have ended up a very plain and 'safe' character, but he's managed to be very charming and entertaining with his struggles and exaggerated behavior, while still being a simple and safe type. Really looking forward to seeing how he plays into the rest of the story, since it seems like his pendant may be kind of important. . . .

[fall0utmind]

Medical leaks au

OMG

I'm speechless

This was absolutely amazing and I'll be awaiting the next part (and wishing for a happy ending for our Marc)

First of all

'His heart stops beating. The room goes dead silent. He can feel everyone’s eyes on him, his fellow riders watching in confusion. For Marc, it is like watching a train wreck in slow motion. He looks up and catches Alex’s wide-eyed stare. He's sweating, beads rolling down the side of his neck. Shit. Fucking shit. He’s starting to think he’s not going to make it out of this press conference in one piece, torn apart by the gnashing teeth of the media.'

This whole paragraph is just mind blowing

I love how you described the media being ruthless (especially since it's Marc's pov)

'He feels like someone has taken a sledgehammer to his facade, destroying everything he has made himself be'

Destroying everything he made himself be🫠and what if I kms

'Alex is the one person he would do anything for, he would walk through hell and back to protect him. He is the only one who truly knows what happened in 2015, who knows the extent of the demons in Marc’s brain. Now they will have to face them again'

yes yes yes, their bond is something from another planet, obv no secrets between them

They really only have themselves (esp on the grid)

'The other pilots probably think he is pathetic. He doesn’t think he can deal with another reason for the others to hate him. As much as he tries to rise above it, he loathes that his colleagues cannot bring themselves to like him'

and what if I kms x2

It's sad that he thinks that everyone hates him(and will hate him more for the attempts)

He is so isolated from the rest 😭(Vale when I catch you, you better crawl on your knees to make up for what you did)

'disgusted by the consequences of Vale's war on Marc?'

Marc, no😭 pecco is just worried (and prob feeling guilty for his mentor's actions)

I hope you will explore Marc's relations with the academy boys in the future

And maybe a Vale pov reaction to the news? pretty please 🥺🙏 (kind of want a pov reaction from pedrenzo and the vr46a too)

Anyway

I think you can tell I loved this fic,

Of course I'll def love any way you take this fic(so long as it has a happy ending)

I hope Marc gets therapy, and Vale, and then they go to couples counselling

This was quite long but oh well

BIG ASK

Haha this is so exciting that you guys have so many thoughts ans ideas from my writing???? Crazy to me

I'm so glad you like the para about the media being awful, o feel like it's such a big part of Marc's real life and it sucks so bad. They're so unfair to him.

Also I really wanted to play yp the idea that Marc is always marx yes but he puts on a bit of a persona for the world and that's all come crumbling down and he DOESNT KNOW WHAT TO DO.

Your comment about Vale made me giggle because a couple of people literally say something like that in the fic later.

I love pecco, I love the idea that he really cares and doesn't want to live with Vales hatred!!!!!

Yes yes yes to the VR46 boys x marx relationship. I'd love to do that. I also wanna do a little bit of their pov/ Vales pov. Maybe as a separate work??

I haven't decided how to make it functional yet lol.

Defo a happy ending!! Don't worry, I've got you on that. There's also going to be some hurt/comfort in the next chapter, it's gonna be like dani,Alex, Jorge, dovi protecting marc as he falls apart hehe

[michdoodles]

mmk, so my thoughts on Sonic movie 3

I very much enjoyed myself watching this movie although I did find that the jokes were pretty darn corny but I knew they would be corny heading in and I still laughed at them so corny but funny. Jim Carrey had no right having so much chemistry with himself in a silly goofy dance scene no less. It was annoying watching eggman/Robotnik call Gerald anything but grandpa like a normal person but I also cringe inside when Boom!eggman tries to use "hip" language so that's just me not liking boomers and early gen x trying to sound like stereotypical gen z teens lol (and I've personally never heard teenagers say stuff like that so come on, writers. Get off of tiktok please). Gerald as a character was also weirdly wacky in this but he was being played by Jim Carrey, I guess I shouldn't have expected anything like the game characterization lol. Speaking of characterization, Shadow's was great! I am stealing that revenge guac line. But seeing him dream with Maria and relive the ptsd of her death and the relationship they had with each other was very good, better than what Sega did to him during the 2010s (good thing I was out of the loop then). That moment where he sees Sonic's reaction to injured Tom and has the flashback to Maria... yeah. But boy still had his mind on revenge and we needed the movie to be nearly two hours long so he doesn't let that change his trajectory, yet. Rewriting his backstory so that he was not made by Gerald but discovered inside a meteorite is alright, his canon backstory in the games isn't realistic in any way so I get it, and this will likely lead up to introducing the Black Arms to the SCU.

But since I am on the subject of Shadow here, what I did not like was that they don't give you time to let it sink in that Shadow has um, "died". I say it in quotes because we saw no body but the explosion is meant to make you assume he's dead. Also, if the games didn't kill off Shadow for good, what makes you think these lighthearted comedy films for the family will? I mean, the end credit scene introduces Metal Sonic, who can only really have been made by Robotnik so I'm assuming neither he nor Shadow are really dead cuz he probably used Shadow's quills as a power source now that they're talking about Chaos energy. But anyway, instead of the movie giving you the time to realize oh wait, Shadow sacrificed himself and just let you sit on that feeling of this poor alien hedgehog who had everything taken away from him dying for the good of humanity because that's what his human sister would have wanted, Tails did an exposition and just... tells you. And then Team Sonic has their moment or whatever, it just... didn't feel quite right. Whereas in Sonic Adventure 2, you have the whole cast just being like "wow, that just happened", Sonic gifting Rouge Shadow's inhibitor ring, the image of Shadow superimposed over the earth... I get emotional thinking of that part and I haven't reached it in my own gameplay. There was like literally no time to get emotional during the movie. It's like Tails pretty much said "Shadow and eggman died" and they move on even tho Sonic was the one that had the moment with Shadow that helps turn him around, that they teamed up to save the earth, they had a BONDING MOMENT. WHY AREN'T YOU MOURNING HIM MORE??? Probably just the executives butting in and saying "nooooo, don't make the kiddies cry, they're here to laugh and make us money enjoy themselves with silly talking superpowered animals!" They did Shadow so much good for his characterization in this movie and then just sweep him under the rug like that? Nawwwwr

I have more thoughts on the movie but I ranted enough lol. Still think it was worth going to the theater for, and like I said, it was a fun watch and I liked it. Just kinda mad with how they ended things with Shadow... for now. And I was quite excited to see them introduce both Metal and Amy, yay! Am I excited for Sonic movie 4? Not really, as this is starting to look like the mcu and I say that as someone that was a big fan of the mcu back in the day and had a freaking crush on Tom Hiddleston because of it. But, I'll probably watch it anyway cuz there's no way three movies can condense the vast amount of history, stories, and characters that exist in Sonic's universe[s]. As long as they don't make another Knuckles show that focuses more on human OCs than the titular anthropomorphic character, we should be fine.

[mamamittens]

Yandere Zoro, Sanji, Kid and Law finding out their darling wants to have kids with them (whatever the kids are adopted or not is up to you)

I think out of all of them, only two would be very reluctant to have biological kids (irregardless of your capability to carry tbh).

Sanji and Law. Sanji because of all the biological engineering his family is known for. Sure, Judge lost interest in him, but there's no guarantee a grandkid would be any safer from the Vinsmokes. Law due to the health issues his whole family had after generations of Amber Lead exposure, which for all he knows has more insidious genetic disorders even after being purged from the poison.

Zoro and Kidd wouldn't have nearly as much of a problem outside of concerns about safety. They're pirates, after all. And whether or not they're retired, they have a hell of a legacy to worry about overshadown their kids.

Now, interestingly, as an extension of weird possessiveness, they'd all be rather interested in building a family. More things to tie you down, and all the better that it's what you wanted to begin with. You'd still be the focus, but that kid(s) would not be far behind. Faster if it's their/your bio kid.

Uh, nsfw under the cut lmao and trigger warning for pregnancy/breeding kink in a bit of it. Kinda gross lol

So, I've long thought that if Law was determined to get you pregnant, he'd have a very easy time of it with his devil fruit in a very.... I'm going to be honest, it's gross. But he could literally dump his cum directly into your womb so like, short of serious fertility issues, it's going to be sooner rather than later. Not that he wouldn't also be doing it the old fashioned way. It's ✨bonding time✨ sex, after all.

He wouldn't want you to just feel like a surrogate. You're the parent too, after all!

Now, for those that can't carry kids (lack of equipment or otherwise), he'd be very interested in what kind of kid you gravitate towards. Viewing it almost like buying you a pet to keep you busy and happy, stowed away on his submarine. At least until he starts bonding with the kid himself and wants to give them what Cora had tried to all those years ago. Paying it forward as it were.

Finding old, faded dreams of building back what he'd lost to make up for what he lost.

No more children who just want to die burning with anger.

Kidd! He's uh, pretty enthusiastic with the overall process. Kinda gross about it but really gets a kick out of marking you up. The changes that occur with a literal pregnancy too, just more evidence of your bond together. It won't be long and it's entirely because once he's got this idea in his head, he's going to keep going until there's no way you can't be.

Anything his baby wants😘

Now for those less able to do the whole baby mama thing, there's a strong chance he just starts picking up random kids like "what do you think, babe? They pout just like you, hah!" While showing them off. Views it less like buying you a puppy and more like solidifying how serious your relationship is.

For some reason I imagine it takes a while to bond with the kid though. He just... Really doesn't like sharing lmao

Sanji is very romantic about it. A very willing vessel to fulfill your true desire after conquering his fears. Worshipful about everything even if it's arguably kinda gross to praise how much of his cum you're holding onto and how cute you look dripping for him. He's dedicated %100 to making a family with you in this, and he'll stay that way too. Don't think he won't.

I feel like he'd be guilty about the relief adoption brings him. One less thing to worry about. Really casting aside the shadow of his family line, no chance of giving his kid some fucked up ability or the attention of Judge. Very affectionate though, almost insufferably so. Even if it's a boy, it's his baby boy now. Ready to learn all the best ways to treat women like the goddesses they are (and S/Os for those not strictly female).

You're a family now, and part of Sanji feels healed having come so far.

Zoro is pretty nonchalant about it. A "you want kids, huh? Alright". Trusts you to know what you want (as long as it's with him, which this is like, doubling down so he's willing to go along with it). If you can have kids, he's going to deliver. And deliver. And keep delivering until you collapse in exhaustion before laughing. "Thought you wanted a baby, babe? What's this quitting shit? We're not stopping until you look ready to pop".

May view it as unconventional exercise for his stamina and yours. You'll have to keep up with a baby after this, after all. And if you don't want take his load after three hours, how could you possibly be ready? Don't be fooled though, he's just being a bastard cause he likes how you look whining for a break underneath him, thighs drenched in cum.

For those who would just have to adopt, he's going to view it more as buying a pet at first. Sorry. Not a fan of sharing your time with a brat and nothing to show for it. May still fuck you senseless to work out that frustration anyway.

Ironically I think having a shared naptime is what's going to sell him on this whole "family" thing. You and the kid curled up on his chest. He feels twice as large and strong, protectively cradling you guys in his arms. You may be his primary focus, but that kid now had his unconscious attention almost as badly. Not... Strictly a bad thing. But he's going to start bonding with the kid however he can while making sure you know you won't be going anywhere either.

Hope that's what you wanted.

[calamitaswrath]

Cal Lucia plays Fire Emblem Path of Radiance: Chapter 8

Just two stray thoughts before I get to the actual chapter - one, for as much as I enjoy the game overall thus far, I have to say that music isn't really all that remarkable. The track that plays on certain maps when they are almost cleared is nice, but it's the only song I really enjoy (which is probably not surprising given that it also made it into Smash). The track that plays when Daein generals like Petrine are on screen meanwhile is just. . . silly.

Not to constantly compare the game to the modern FEs, but with Greil in particular, I feel there's def a comparison to be made with Jeralt in Three Houses. To be more precise, I just feel that Greil's death has more weight to it since the first seven chapters (plus prologue) of the game really took their time to not only set him up, but also his connection to the mercenaries, and how they play off of him. Jeralt, by contrast. . . he doesn't really interact that much with anybody, and since Byleth is functionally mute in 3H, the impact of his death solely hinges on the connection the player forms with him. It really works just better in PoR, and not just because Ike isn't mute.

Ouh, case in point! A flashback (that seems to take place in the exact spote where Greil got killed), a CG illustration of Ike and Mist at the tombstone. . . that's the good stuff.

Ahhhhh and Titania putting her own grief aside the moment she notices Ike showing up! Ike apologizing to her and Soren, thanking them for sticking with him!

And exit Shinon and Gatrie. Shinon was just about expected, but I am lowkey surprised that Gatrie left with him. From a gameplay perspective I can understand it, since he also was a pre-promote, but from his writing, he always seemed more onboard with Ike than Shinon did. But then again, given the 🏳️‍🌈 vibes between them. . .

Oh, the way Ike assumes responsibility. . . it definitely reminds me of Chrom taking over as exalt in Awakening. And, given that Ike doesn't have to share the protag status with two other characters, I hope that unlike Awakening, this gets properly resolved and developed

Soren is pretty humble here, huh? That's some of the basis for their chemistry then, I take it

Ahh, finally stuff like the convoy, buying items and supports get introduced. . . really rather late for my liking, but at least it neatly ties into the story here

Only got one support unlocked so far, which is the C support between Ike and Oscar. Good found family content in that one, though! And lol @ Mist's cooking.

"Info". . .? Not quite sure what to make of that menu point. But Aimee and Muston! I've definitely seen Aimee before, in one of those "Ike doesn't care about affection from women" posts. I'll gladly take her affection though

Jorge and Daniel. I have no comment. ...No, literally. They don't stand out enough in any way

Huh. . . the more I look at it. . . is this "Info" point just little bonus scenes? Just saw Titania's. . . woof. That's good content.

Ahh, bonus experience! I've heard a bit about that gameplay mechanic. . . and also already learned that I missed out on a lot on that escape map when I had Ike escape first. I hope that future chapters actually tell you what these bonus objectives are. . .

I levelled up Mia once with this and she got stats on everything except for resistence???

Well, doesn't that just look like another defend map!

Mist's medallion is glowing again. How unimportant.

Why, an enemy unit who's a cute girl and not the boss? She's definitely not important.

Three clear chokepoints, and enemies that just approach you one after another. Pretty doable. The cleric with the fire jewel tried to escape, but I managed to track him down with Titania and get the thing.

Mist talking about wanting to die alongside Ike?? Holy shit, that's dark

Oh my. Big buff cat man Mordecai. . . I remember a post about somebody wanting to fuck him, and then needing to clarify that they didn't mean a cartoon bird by the same name

Lethe! Honestly surprised that it took this long for them to introduce a catgirl. And she doesn't immediately trust Ike and the others. . . that's neat.

Ah. Soren does a racism. I did wonder why he's more divisive among some people, so I guess that'd do it

You know, for how antagonist Lethe was just a moment ago, she did calm down very quickly here, mission or not

[its-hai-time]

hi i have had turnabout light brainrot for the past like 2 days but specifically about the concept of a soundtrack for it bc i am absolutely obsessed with video game osts so i am going to unload all my thoughts. i'd imagine the song for klavier's apartment is really empty and just doesn't have much going on. would fit how he is just. really alone there. also it's in c minor. idk i just think every depressing song in c minor sounds good. i don't know any other locations the case would include, but i'm still playing around with what klavier's jail cell theme might be. athena's is a music box version of her theme and trucy's is a slower/sadder remix of her's, so i've tried slowing down guilty love. unfortunately the music production team is amazing and it still sounds very peppy at .25 speed, and just doesn't fit the vibe at all. so i thought maybe it would instead be guitar's serenade or the gavinners • twilight gig. both are absolutely GORGEOUS themes that i would love to see reused, and both come from cases where he lost someone important to him (daryan went to jail and his law mentor died). even just incorporating elements of those songs into a different new theme created for the turnabout would give me psychic damage and make me pass away instantly from how happy i would be. an acoustic guitar with some reverb would fit extremely well too, and i'm always one for throwing mallet percussion into everything and anything, so i can see it having a marimba or vibraphone as well. additionally, given this isn't just an added case to another game and is rather a whole new game, apollo's theme would get an update like it does every game. 2013 had this beautiful electric guitar section, and 2016 had what i think is a synth solo that was absolutely amazing. i think it would be really cool if this version included the bell bits that were in the orchestra and 2013 versions of the theme!! also the 2013 version's ending is honestly my favorite of all time, so it would be neat if it included something similar to that. honestly even if you never listen to another theme from dual destinies PLEASE listen to apollo's theme it's so good i force everyone i meet to listen to it. i have so much more i could say but i'm just now realizing how long i've already made this so i'm gonna stop now. sorry i am a massive game music nerd and love your comic lol. super excited for part 13, but remember to take your time and not feel pressured to release it before you think it's ready.

the thought that someone can have actual brainrot for my work is amazing aaaaah. Anyways I'm LOVING these music ideas, especially for Klavier's apartment, you'd expect it to be pretty over the top for the rock star himself; but he really doesn't live in his apartment that much, it's kind of a lonely place when you look around at it. A slower, understated score fits much better to show how empty the place is. Anyways I've never played past aa4 so I'll be checking out those apollo themes soon I guess lol.

anon if you wanna message me with your musical score brainrot I'm literally so open. I always love opportunities to talk about the game au as a whole rather than just the one case everyone knows.

[smiles-advice]

(TLDR: I need advice getting over a heartbreak that I feel like is entirely my own fault)

Hi, I need some advice but there's no one really I can talk to about this, so is it okay if I ask you?

Almost a year ago now I (20f) had a really bad fight with my best friend and it ended up with me kicking her out of my house and later blocking her. (I handled it badly at the time)

For context I'm really sick/ disabled and out of nowhere she started telling me that it was all in my head and I just wasn't trying hard and all sorts of stuff like that. It was awful but In hindsight I really don't think she understood why what she was saying was as hurtful as it was.. I don't think she really knew what she was doing.

There's a bunch of other context that isn't worth getting into but long story short she was really ableist to me and I couldn't deal with it and got mad and overreacted (I actually ended up calling my dad and he got mad at her too..). It was messy and painful. That's all been and gone now.

The problem is that I did and still do love her and it hasn't gone away in all that time.

In my head I know that she was awful to me about my chronic pain and fatigue and stuff and I know she didn't like me using a wheelchair despite it giving me my life back and there's a whole host of other things. But I can't reconcile that with how she's still my favourite person I've ever met and everything that makes me happy reminds me of her. I could tell you a million things that make her a good person.

It's especially difficult because she's still the person I want to go to for support??? Like so much of what I'm going through with my health right now is so scary and I wish I could talk to her about it.

I tried reaching out to her a couple of months ago to apologise for kicking her out and upsetting her. Like, despite my feelings about how she treated me I genuinely never wanted to hurt her and I regret it more than pretty much anything in my life????

But that went badly. She made it seem like she didn't think she'd done anything wrong (i.e the whole ableism stuff) and I ended up blocking her again. Not exactly my finest moment. I really  messed up 100% would have been better for both of us if I hadn't tried reaching out. No chance in hell of me fixing stuff after that.

But now I just don't know what to do with myself. I feel like I ruined our friendship over nothing. The pain of not having her in my life is so much worse than anything she said that hurt me. I feel like such an awful person for hurting her, but there's literally nothing I can do to fix that now. I just feel completely heartbroken but since I never told her I loved her it doesn't feel fair to call it a heartbreak. I just feel like I made such a massive mistake.

I don't know if you're able to give me any advice to get over this/ her. (I've thought over what I could have done differently about 5000 times) But I just really needed to ask someone. Idk I just feel like I'm a terrible person rn lol

(I'm really sorry about how vent-y this is as well)

Hello lovey!

First off, I'm so very sorry for how long it's taken me to respond, my heads been a mess, I've been in a manic episode, I'm getting back. Sorry.

Now, all of this advice is just my personal opinion. Take it or leave it.

Personally, I think you're in the right here. I think cutting people off is never easy, especially when they are so close to you, but I think you did well. Blocking them, not engaging, that's the right move. You don't need someone in your life who invalidates you and your health like that.

I personally wouldn't have reached out to them at all, but I can see why you did.

It's gonna be hard to move on. They were important to you, they played a part in your life, and you can't just forget that. It's important to remember that they weren't a good friend to you, that you're better off without them. Just keep reminding yourself of that.

Also, don't apologise for venting. I don't mind!

Hope I've helped, sorry again,

lots of love 💕

[9902sgirl]

Okay, sorry for the super long reaction time, but I've literally been stewing over this one for over 24 hrs now.

In a very short summary, I loved it so much and it made me feel first time butterflies all over again!!

Below is my promised dissertation, feel free to skip if you don't want to read all that, but 1000/10 recommend this one!!

*cracks all of my crackable bones* It's Time

First of all, I love how Hunter and Omega do a debrief after school, and sit together to review everything, if I headcanon anything, that's on the top of the list.

Crosshair, being the super spy he is, with a laundry basket in tow is so domestic, love that.

This part

"Omega scoffs. She's getting better at that. It almost sounds natural now."

The teen angst is coming in hot, shes just like her brothers, all millions of them, including Boba.

The fact that she is struggling with literature is honestly so perfect when you get down to her base upbringing, I love your analysis of that!

"Out of the three brothers, Crosshair was the only one who actually made a habit out of reading, though he'd never admit it to anyone."

I truly think he would have had pocket editions of books for super long or boring missions, up in a snipers nest, not seeing any action for hours? Yeah, this guy reads 100%

"He has to remind himself that doing that would only make Omega feel worse, and he doesn't want to upset her."

We LOVE a socially conscious king!!! We are not giving her a reason to feel guilty here! She tried and that's what matters, his feelings about this (politely) have no rights here.

"he's half-tempted to find the teacher's home address and tell her just how wrong she is."

Loving the protective *younger* brother here (lol)

"She's a brilliant kid, and she has such a great sense of herself, but I'm not equipped to handle a student like her."

This kind of teacher is severely under-rated. One who is not afraid to say that one of their students is struggling due to the curriculum, instead of just blaming the kid for being, well, a kid.

"It's not the first time he's found himself admiring the way someone looks, but it's the first time it's left him feeling like his heart's about to burst out of his chest."

AHHH that is so freaking cute, I'm gonna throw myself out of the window!!!!

"Does he come off as the type of person who would file a formal complaint over a grade?

Probably, actually."

That made me actually laugh out loud my first read through

"You stand as well, and the height difference between the two of you is not lost on him. He has to look down to meet your eyes, and the way you have to tilt your head up makes him feel strangely amused."

Yes, this is one of my favorite tropes, thank you for the mention. Yes, my heart fluttered a little, why do you ask?

"He's not the kind of man who caves to pretty girls asking him for favors, and he's definitely not going to cave now.

He's stronger than this. He can resist the urge. He's a trained soldier, a skilled marksman, and he's not about to give in to the will of a cute teacher.

He's stronger than this."

Lmao no tf you are not Mr. Sharpshooter, imma need you to take a knee for this one

"Not as much as he hates himself, though.

Because he knows better. He knows it's wrong, knows it's stupid, and yet, he can't seem to stop himself."

It's not wrong loverboy, that's your conditioning showing. I love these small peeks into his psyche and seeing how bad the conditioning and training affected him. And, to be completely honest, I know fics are typically designed to make us feel better about what canon left off or damaged us with, but I truly do not think we touch on the fact that these men were taught that they were disposable from day 1. Like, how do they get over something like that after O-66 and they are out of the Empire? It's heartbreaking and I need them all in therapy for it ASAP.

"But, at the same time, he wishes you would look at him. Just once. Just a quick glance, a tiny smile, a small nod. Something."

OOOFFF First love longing hits like no other, and this is ITTTTTT

"Seeing how far he can push you, seeing how much you can take before you crack"

Okay, I'm settling with the fact that I read too much filth, especially since this made me feel multiple things at once. I need a bath in holy water or something. Back to fluff

"Is he flirting?

No, that's not right.

He's not flirting.

He's just being...friendly."

Uh-huh, sure. Totally not, you just can't breath right when the light hits her in a certain way, or if she laughs at one of your quips. Not at all. You are just pals, history will say you were close friends, maybe roommates.

Delulu. I love it.

"Crosshair isn't the kind of person who gets all worked up over a pretty girl. He’s not even the kind of person who gets all worked up, period."

Yeah, get ready for that to change entirely buddy, you're about to be feral. Like fr, the emotional exhaustion he's gonna feel once they get into this? He's just so used to not having extreme emotions or physical reactions to feelings. Its going to be amazing.

"Crosshair has been told his whole life that he's difficult to deal with, and he's learned to live with that. He's used to people being afraid of him, and he's used to people not wanting to be around him. He used to take pride in the fact that people were scared of him, but lately, it's started to wear on him."

I WANT TO COMFORT THIS MAN SO BAD OMG THIS MADE ME SAD.

"it reminds him so much of Hunter that he has to take a deep breath and count to ten before he can speak again. And even then, he's still annoyed."

I love that, she is made of all of the pieces of those who raised her. We stan Omega in this house.

"She was looking at you, like, the entire time. The whole trip. I'm surprised you didn't notice."

THEY WERE PLAYING VISUAL TAG WITHOUT EACH OTHER NOTICING???? Excuse me for a moment

Okay, I'm better, lets continue.

"No, not okay," he says. "If you tell them, I'll kill you."

The most brotherly thing to say about literally anything, but especially this lmao 10/10 realistic sibling interaction especially this part right after

"she just looks up at him, unbothered."

"Every morning, when he drops Omega off at school, he makes sure to walk her inside. You're always there, and he doesn't miss the way you look up when the door opens or the way you smile when you see him."

Literally the cutest interaction type I think in this story. The school drop off?? Seeing him be paternal?? And think of her side, starting to look forward to every morning for a more specific reason, getting any excuse to interact with him in any way? Like, too cute, especially this part

"He even brought you coffee one day, after you'd stayed late to work on a project with Omega, and you'd blushed.

Blushed.

For him."

HE BROUGHT HER COFFEE? I can imagine that would be a reoccurring theme for them in the future and it makes my heart sing, they will be domestic as hell and I would eat it tf UPPP. And OFC she blushed for you, you big amazing dummy, you are a rough around the edges, takes no shit, and overprotective man, and you are being soft for her. It would have me like

"I knew you liked her, but I didn't know it was this bad," Hunter says."

My mans is down bad bad Hunter. We're in SIMPING hours over here, you don't even knowwww

"Your smile is so bright, so radiant, that it makes his heart ache. He can't remember the last time someone was this happy to spend time with him. He's not used to feeling wanted, and the knowledge that you enjoy his company fills him with a sense of pride he's not quite prepared for."

This actually made my chest feel warm, we love reassurance in this house more than anything. He deserves nothing less than to feel like the most important person to someone else. I know we shouldn't base our value off of what other people think or feel about you, but you can't self love your way out of repressed childhood trauma without help.

I CAN'T STOP THINKING ABOUT HOW THEY MET WHEN THE SUN WAS SETTING AND NOW THEY ARE COMING TOGETHER WHEN THE SUN IS SETTING!!!! Its like poetry, it rhymes....

"He doesn't want anything from you. He doesn't need anything from you. He doesn't expect anything from you. But, as he stands there, trying not to dwell on the way his heart is racing, the way his stomach is twisting, the way his breath catches in his throat, he can't help but feel like a bit of an idiot."

I felt all of these feelings in real time while reading this part. It is painfully accurate on how this situation feels, it's amazing!

The anxiety spiral after that string of thoughts?? Chefs kiss.

YALL HE DID IT!! HE ASKED HER TO DINNER AND SHE SAID YES!!!

"This whole time," you begin, and you have to bite back another laugh. "I've been trying to figure out how to ask you out."

OMFG They are IDOTS, complete DUMMYS, in Love. This is so cute. The buffs are sure ooned here. I can't get enough of this trope. I'm gonna be a blubbering mess by the end of this.

"You squeeze his hand, and he squeezes back, a smile forming on his face."

Red Alert!!! He's not watching the fireworks here!! HE IS WATCHING HER WATCH THE FIREWORKS HERE!!!!

"Hmm, well, let's try that again," he murmurs, and you laugh, a soft breath against his lips."

THIS MAN WAS WORRIED HE WAS GONNA RUIN IT ALL AND HE PULLS SOME SLICK SHIT LIKE THIS??

"he rests his forehead against yours, his eyes closed, his fingers digging into your hips."

I'm not sorry, but I love this so much??? Kissing foreheads??? MY LOVE LANGUAGE OMG

"Because I'm trying to be good," Crosshair explains. "And you're making it very difficult."

So, you want me to die from tension?? Because, oh my god this is the best possible line for it.

The kiss on the hand? Take me out, cut the show, I'm down for the count.

"Omega’s chosen a chair that faces the front door, and her head snaps over toward him as soon as he walks in."

I can feel Omegas patience wearing thin at this point lmao

"He hadn't thought he'd have this again, a family, people who cared about him, and he hadn't dared to hope that he'd find something else, something more. He hadn't even known what he was missing until he met you.

And, for the first time in a long time, he's excited for the future."

I AM SO HAPPY WITH THIS!!!! This was so so good that I felt like I had to sit and type out everything, because masterful work like this deserves all of the attention. Thank you for this story, and stirring these first time emotions within me, and everyone else who reads this. My flabbers are ghasted Roy. This one is quite literally one for the books.

Lessons of the Heart

Pairing: Crosshair x fem!Reader / Crosshair x Teacher!Reader

Words: 15,738

Tags/Warnings: fluff, so much fluff, strangers to lovers, soft!Crosshair, grumpy/sunshine dynamic, awkward flirting, mutual pining, kissing/making out, Crosshair's anxiety, reader has long-ish hair, Tech mentioned briefly

Summary: Over a year after settling on Pabu, Crosshair is still struggling to adapt to life without having something to fight, or fight for. When Omega comes home with a bad grade, he jumps at the chance to help. He doesn't expect to become so invested, and he certainly doesn't expect to fall for his sister's teacher.

A/N: This one got away from me! But since the poll indicated I should keep this all one part, here you go. I really enjoyed writing Crosshair's perspective and all the little sibling moments in here.

Previous Work | Next Work | Masterlist

"Again, Omega? We talked about this."

Crosshair stops dead in his tracks, one boot in front of the other, and stares straight ahead. The basket of dirty clothes in his grip hangs limp by his side as he stands in the hallway, listening. Hunter and Omega are in the kitchen, the latter having just gotten back from another day at school, and they’re clearly talking about something serious.

Crosshair doesn't dare to breathe too loud in case he misses a single word. It's hard not to notice how Hunter's voice drops low when he speaks, trying not to be overheard by someone. By someone like Crosshair.

"I know, Hunter," she groans. He can hear the sound of something hit the counter, likely a datapad, and Omega shifts on her stool. "I tried on this one, I promise."

Hunter hums in a tone that makes it clear he's not quite believing her, and Crosshair's eyebrows raise a little in curiosity.

"Let me see, please."

"Hunter—"

"Omega."

She huffs, but a few seconds later, the datapad slides across the counter with a quiet squeak, and Omega's chair scrapes across the floor as she sits back down. "There. Happy?"

"Thank you." There's a pause, and Crosshair can only imagine the face Hunter is making as he reads whatever it is that Omega is showing him. His voice is stern, a tone that Crosshair's come to know as the sergeant, not the brother. "What is this?"

"I told you," she whines.

"She gave you a 50%?" Hunter's voice raises slightly. "Why would she do that?"

Omega scoffs. She's getting better at that. It almost sounds natural now.

Crosshair peeks around the corner, and sure enough, Hunter has the datapad in his hands, reading over whatever report the teacher sent back. Omega sits next to him, her shoulders slumped, arms crossed, and she's not meeting his gaze. Her backpack sits unzipped, its contents strewn out across the countertop and the stool where she usually sits.

He knows he shouldn't eavesdrop, but he's been doing it for so long he's not sure how to stop. And besides, the look on Hunter's face is one he doesn't like.

They'd all known going into this that Omega wasn't going to have an easy time at school. She excelled far beyond her peers in most subjects — math, history, science, languages, you name it — but there were two subjects where her intelligence failed her. Art, for one, because it was hard to grasp the concept of drawing something when she had no frame of reference. And then, of course, there was literature.

It's not her fault, and Hunter's well aware of it. Her education prior to the Batch adopting her was entirely focused on being the best lab assistant a Kaminoan could ever want. Over time, she soaked up anything they would teach her. Strategy, engineering, politics, even some basic medical training — Omega could do it all. But, as it turned out, there was a pretty big part of her education that she was severely lacking in, and it was starting to show.

Out of the three brothers, Crosshair was the only one who actually made a habit out of reading, though he'd never admit it to anyone. So he tried his best to teach Omega the concepts that her teacher was trying to instill in her, but sometimes it was difficult.

Literature was, by nature, subjective. It's always up for debate, and Crosshair found himself constantly questioning himself while helping Omega with her assignments. It usually ended with both of them frustrated, and Hunter or Wrecker stepping in to mediate the situation.

But still, Omega loved her classes, even if they were difficult. And Crosshair would never say it out loud, but he enjoyed spending time with her and helping her learn, even if it wasn't always the easiest.

It seemed, though, that her teacher didn't agree with his methods.

Hunter looks up from the datapad and places it on the counter. He takes a deep breath, letting it out slowly, and reaches across to pat Omega's shoulder. "It's okay. We can work with this."

She shrugs him off and hops down from the stool, gathering her things and stuffing them into her bag. When she tries to reach for the datapad, Hunter snatches it up and holds it out of her reach.

"Give it to me, Hunter."

"No. We're going to talk about this, Omega."

"There's nothing to talk about," she mutters, trying again and failing to grab the datapad.

Crosshair takes that as his cue. He steps into the kitchen and drops the basket of laundry onto the ground by his feet, the force of the landing enough to get their attention.

"Oh, good," Hunter says, looking at Crosshair. "You're home."

"Yep." Crosshair pops the 'p' and folds his arms, leaning back against the wall. He meets Omega's eyes for a moment, and the look on her face is like a punch to the gut. She looks defeated, and it's not a look that suits her.

He hates seeing her upset, especially over something so trivial. It's a report, and not even a very important one. It's not like her grades in the other classes were suffering. She was passing every single one of them with flying colors. It's just this one assignment, this one class, this one teacher who seems hellbent on making her feel bad about herself.

Crosshair can feel the rage bubbling under the surface. How dare her teacher give her a score that low, and why? Because of his help? That was his job, and he was doing it.

"What's going on?" Crosshair asks. He's still staring at Omega, trying to get her to look up at him, to meet his gaze, but she's not taking the bait. She's got her arms folded, her shoulders tense, and her lower lip juts out as she pouts at Hunter.

"I told her we'd talk about it, and she doesn't want to." Hunter sets the datapad back down, sliding it across the counter.

Crosshair picks it up, glancing at the words on the screen before scrolling through the report. It's an analysis, one he's read a million times. He doesn't bother skimming it, because he already knows exactly what she wrote. It's a decent summary of the text, and her thoughts and opinions are written plainly and with an obvious understanding of what the author meant. It's not her fault her teacher wanted her to interpret the text the way a typical thirteen-year-old might, but that wasn't who Omega was.

He glances back up at Hunter. "And what is there to talk about?"

"Well, her teacher doesn't seem to agree with her analysis," Hunter says. He nods at the datapad in Crosshair's hand. "The comments."

Crosshair finds the section in question and reads over the notes. It's a lot of the same, just worded a bit differently, but one comment sticks out among the rest.

Please try to stick to the original meaning of the text, Omega. You did well explaining how your interpretation differed from the traditional meaning, but try to focus on the actual story. 

It's the most condescending, ridiculous thing Crosshair has ever read, and he has to keep himself from throwing the datapad at the wall. He has to remind himself that doing that would only make Omega feel worse, and he doesn't want to upset her.

Instead, he takes a deep breath and hands the datapad back to her.

"This is stupid," he says, and he can see Hunter's eye twitch at his choice of words. "I read the text. I know what it means, and you know what it means. What, are you supposed to go through the entire thing and find the most cliche, obvious way of reading it?"

"No," Omega mumbles.

"Right," he agrees. "So then why is she giving you a low grade for your own thoughts and opinions?"

Omega shrugs. She's frowning, staring down at the datapad like it personally offended her.

And Crosshair knows that feeling, intimately. It's the same way he'd stare at the training room floor whenever a drill sergeant would call him a failure. It grates on his nerves, and he's half-tempted to find the teacher's home address and tell her just how wrong she is.

"But I'm doing it wrong," Omega says, her voice small and defeated.

Hunter is glaring at him now, but Crosshair can't find it in him to care.

"No, you're not," Crosshair insists, and he takes a seat beside her at the counter. "You did your research. You did everything you were supposed to, and you wrote a report about what you think it meant. What's wrong with that?"

Omega shrugs again, and he can see her hands balling up into fists.

The sight alone is enough to set him on edge. His entire body feels like a coiled spring, his muscles tense and ready to go. He hates seeing her like this. She's a bright kid, always smiling and happy, and to see her so down on herself makes him feel ill, and the last thing he wants is for her to think she's failed somehow.

Crosshair doesn't know why the teacher doesn't understand that, doesn't appreciate how amazing it is that a girl her age is even capable of writing a paper like this. Maybe, somewhere deep down, the teacher does get it. Maybe she's just pushing her own agenda. It wouldn't surprise Crosshair in the slightest, and the more he thinks about it, the more annoyed he gets.

"Maybe I should comm her," Hunter says, interrupting his train of thought.

Crosshair snaps his head around, glaring daggers at his brother. "No."

"Excuse me?"

"Don't comm her." He pushes himself away from the counter and stands. "I'll handle this."

Hunter stares at him, one eyebrow raised, clearly confused. "Handle it?"

"Yeah. I'm gonna talk to her."

"Cross," Hunter says, but he doesn't finish his sentence.

Crosshair doesn't stick around long enough to hear the end of it. He's already halfway out the door, pulling his jacket off the hook, and slamming the door shut behind him.

Crosshair is pissed.

He doesn't often get angry. Annoyed, frustrated, irritated, yes. All those are familiar. But angry? Angry is not something he deals with. He can't stand it, the way his chest feels like it's about to explode, the way his heart rate picks up and his stomach feels sick. Anger makes him feel out of control, and the last thing he wants is to lose the little self-control he does have.

But now?

Now, he's angry.

Omega doesn't deserve to be treated like this. She doesn't deserve the way her teacher is talking to her, telling her she's doing something wrong when she isn't. If anything, the teacher should be grateful that Omega is even bothering to read the texts in the first place, that she's putting in the effort to analyze the meanings behind them.

He's so caught up in his own thoughts, he barely realizes how far he's gone. It's only when he spots the school, the tall building looming in the distance, does he realize he's halfway across town, and the sun is starting to dip below the horizon.

He slows his pace, taking a moment to catch his breath, and glances around. He's only been here a few times, just long enough to drop Omega off at the start of the day or pick her up after. He's never actually been inside, never even met a single one of her teachers, and he has no idea where her classroom even is.

A sign points him towards the front entrance, and he follows it. There's a handful of other parents waiting around the main entrance, all of them talking and laughing and joking with one another. A few of them glance his way, watching him curiously as he approaches the doors.

He ignores them, slipping inside and letting the doors close behind him. The hallways are quiet, and the sound of his boots against the tile echoes throughout the empty halls. He's not entirely sure where he's going, but he figures it can't be that hard to find her classroom.

It isn't.

It takes him less than a minute to locate her name, next to a door decorated with bright colors and images of what he assumes are the characters from a few of the stories they've read. He doesn't stop to admire the decorations, though. He doesn't stop at all, really. He pushes the door open and walks right inside, his eyes scanning the room.

The rows of chairs and desks are empty, but the one near the holoboard at the front of the room is occupied. There's a human woman sitting there, head bowed over a desk as she writes, and Crosshair strides up to her without hesitation.

"I want to talk about the report you gave Omega," he says, his voice tight, barely able to contain his anger. The woman looks up, clearly startled, and blinks owlishly at him.

The anger coursing through his veins suddenly tempers as he locks eyes with you, and he finds himself at a loss for words.

You're not what he was expecting, not in the slightest. He'd expected someone older, a woman with graying hair and crow's feet, maybe, one who's lived enough years to become old and jaded. Not this. Not you.

Your eyes are wide and bright, and the expression on your face is nothing short of adorable. He's not sure where that word came from, thrust to the forefront of his consciousness with the force of a speeder, but he can't deny that it's accurate. Your hair is tied up in a messy bun, a few loose strands hanging over your face, and there's a small, pink stylus stuck behind your ear. Your lips are slightly parted, a pretty shade of pink that almost matches the color of the pen, and he watches as they slowly form into a small 'o' as you process what's going on.

And then, just as quickly, your expression changes.

The adorableness falls away, and you straighten your posture, your brows furrowing and your lips pulling into a tight line.

"You must be Crosshair."

He frowns. "How did you—"

"She talks about you." You nod, glancing him up and down, and Crosshair has to fight the urge to shrink under your scrutiny. His mouth feels dry, and the sudden change in tone catches him off-guard. He was expecting defensiveness, maybe a little bit of anger. Instead, you sound...

Well, he can't really place it.

Crosshair nods, and he can feel his cheeks heat up. It's probably because he's angry. It has nothing to do with the way you're looking at him, the way your eyes rake over him, or the way your lips are curled up ever so slightly in a hint of a smile.

You clear your throat and gesture to the seat in front of you. He settles in it, not because you told him to, but because it seems like the polite thing to do. And because he wants to sit down.

Once he's seated, you fold your hands and place them on the desk, giving him your full attention. "I'm glad you're here."

That throws him. "You are?"

"Of course," you say, and the smile on your face is nothing short of dazzling. "I've been hoping to meet you for a while now. Omega speaks so highly of you, and I have to say, I was looking forward to finally meeting the man who's been helping her with her assignments."

And then, you do something Crosshair wasn't expecting. You extend your hand, offering a handshake.

He looks down at your hand, your fingers spread out, palm facing up. Your nails are painted a bright shade of pink, and there's a small smear of what looks like ink near the tip of your index finger. He glances up at your face, and you're smiling at him, the corners of your eyes crinkling a bit as you do.

His stomach does a weird flip, and his chest suddenly feels a lot warmer. He doesn't know what it is about your smile, your eyes, your voice, but it's...nice.

You're nice.

He doesn't take your hand.

You pull it away, but the smile doesn't leave your face. You don't seem offended or hurt, and you're still looking at him with an expression that can only be described as genuine kindness.

Crosshair swallows the lump in his throat. It's getting harder to stay angry, but he does his best to cling to his resolve. 

"You graded her report wrong,” he hisses.

He expects you to get defensive, maybe even offended. After all, no one likes having their work challenged. But instead, you just sigh.

You look down at your desk, grabbing the stylus and twirling it between your fingers. The light reflects off the smooth surface, glinting off the tip of the tool, and the movement is almost hypnotic. He has to force himself to look away, to focus on your face.

For the first time since he barged into your classroom, he notices the tiredness in your eyes. It's subtle, and he doesn't think anyone else would notice, but the way your shoulders sag is a dead giveaway. You look exhausted, and Crosshair suddenly feels an odd pang of guilty for dropping in on you like this.

Your smile is tight when you look up at him again..

"I can explain my rationale, if you'd like," you say, and it's not a question. It's a statement.

He's not sure if he should be annoyed by that or not, but he nods regardless.

"Thank you." 

You reach for a datapad laying haphazardly across your desk and tap away for a moment, before you hold it out for him to take. His fingers brush yours as he accepts it, and the touch sends a tingle up his arm. He tries not to show it, though, and busies himself by looking over the file as you speak.

"I know Omega has been struggling in my class, and I've done everything I can to make sure she has the support she needs. But, unfortunately, there's not a lot I can do when the curriculum is so..."

You pause, and he raises an eyebrow. "So what?"

"Well, it's not exactly tailored for her," you finish, and the small laugh you let out is strained. You shrug, a gesture that's supposed to be nonchalant, but he can see the tension in your shoulders.

He hums, nodding along as you continue to talk.

"I don't usually get students like Omega, you know? Kids who've already seen the world and have lived through so much more than their peers. And that's great, I mean, it's awesome. She's a brilliant kid, and she has such a great sense of herself, but I'm not equipped to handle a student like her."

Crosshair stops scrolling, his thumb hovering over the screen. He looks up at you, and you're staring back, chewing on your bottom lip.

He swallows the lump in his throat and nods. "So, what does that mean?"

"It means..." You trail off, letting out a sigh and shaking your head. You look away, turning to stare out the window behind you. The sun is setting, and the last rays of the day are reflecting off the buildings in the distance, bathing the room in an orange glow.

He watches the way the light illuminates your face, highlighting the curves and lines. It's not the first time he's found himself admiring the way someone looks, but it's the first time it's left him feeling like his heart's about to burst out of his chest.

It's not until you turn back to face him, the light fading, does he realize he's been holding his breath.

"I'm sorry, what was I saying?" you ask, and he's not sure if it's the lighting or his imagination, but he swears there's a faint flush creeping up your neck and cheeks.

"You were talking about the report," he says, his voice a little softer than usual.

You blink. "Oh, right. Of course." You clear your throat, sitting up a little straighter, and Crosshair has to remind himself not to lean in. "I graded the report based on how she did against the curriculum."

"Which is stupid."

"Yeah, I know." You tuck a strand of hair behind your ear, and Crosshair tracks the movement. "But it's how it works, unfortunately. We have a certain set of standards we have to abide by, and unfortunately, Omega's interpretation of the story was outside those standards."

"So? Her analysis is solid, and you know it," he says.

"It is," you agree, and the corner of your mouth twitches up into a half-smile. Your eyes are soft and full of understanding, and Crosshair has to look away.

"Her argument was well-researched, and her points were valid," you say, and it's with an apologetic tone. "But she also failed to follow directions."

Crosshair blinks.

That's not right.

"What?"

"She was asked to write a report on her thoughts and opinions on a classic work, and her interpretation of the story was excellent, but..."

"But what?" He knows he's being defensive, and he's not sure why, but the thought of you grading her unfairly, giving her a low score because of something that was his fault, makes his blood boil.

He takes a deep breath and leans back in his chair, folding his arms and forcing himself to relax.

You don't seem bothered by his attitude, though. In fact, you just smile at him.

"Well, she did a wonderful job of explaining her interpretation, but she failed to stick to the author's original meaning," you explain. "And while I understand why she was interpreting the text the way she was, and I'm happy she's able to do that, she was asked to write a paper specifically about the author's intended meaning."

Crosshair doesn't respond. He stares at you, his lips pressed together, trying his hardest to stay calm.

He has to admit, it makes sense. You're just doing your job, and the fact that you're even taking the time to explain it to him is a testament to how hard you're trying. But that doesn't make the situation any easier, and the disappointment in Omega’s voice when she'd shown him her report earlier that day is still fresh in his mind.

"It doesn't change the fact that she's brilliant," you say, interrupting his train of thought.

He snaps his head up, staring at you, and the expression on your face is almost...tender. You're not just saying it to placate him, or to try and get him to leave. No, you mean it. He didn't realize just how much you cared about his sister, and he's taken aback by how sincere you are.

"Omega is an incredibly intelligent young woman, and I am in awe of her every day." You lean forward, your elbows resting on the desk. You're smiling, but there's a hint of sadness in your eyes, and the way you speak, the words that spill out of your mouth, are genuine. "I can't begin to imagine the things she's been through, and I know that's not an excuse for how difficult I've been, but I'm sorry. I really am."

The anger he'd been holding onto melts away, replaced by a strange mixture of pride and confusion. He's proud that you care so much about Omega, and confused by how much it seems to affect him. He'd expected you to be stubborn, maybe even rude. But this? This isn't anything like the image he'd conjured up in his mind.

It's...

Nice.

"So, what now?" he asks.

"Well," you start, and the smile on your face turns mischievous, "you're welcome to challenge my grade. You can go to the school board, or we can go to the principal's office. You could even submit a formal complaint, or—"

"No," he interrupts, and his cheeks flush when he realizes how fast the word came out. He clears his throat, trying to compose himself, and says, "I meant, what do we do? To help her?"

"Oh." You blink, clearly surprised.

He's not sure why. Does he come off as the type of person who would file a formal complaint over a grade?

Probably, actually.

"Right," you say, and you take a moment to collect your thoughts. "Well, there's not a lot we can do. This was her last chance to make up for her last test score, and I'm afraid she'll have to repeat the class next year."

"There has to be something you can do," he insists. The words fall out of his mouth before his brain catches up, and he's already cringing internally at how desperate he sounds.

"Look," you sigh. "You're not the first parent to come in here at the end of the semester and ask me to raise a grade. But, if I raised Omega's grade, then I would have to raise the grades of everyone else who turned in a similar report. And I can't do that."

"You can't be serious," he scoffs, rolling his eyes.

"I am," you say, an edge to your voice. "It wouldn't be fair."

"Life's not fair."

"Yeah, no kidding." You huff a humorless laugh. Your lips purse, and he can tell you're holding back a glare. 

He knows he's pushing his luck, and he's starting to feel like an idiot, but he can't help himself.

"You can't honestly tell me that there's nothing we can do."

Your eyes flicker away from his, and your gaze drifts down to the datapad. He can see your mind working, can see the gears turning as you mull over your options. You chew on your lower lip, and Crosshair tries not to stare, but it's a struggle.

He's never met someone who could have him going from angry to intrigued in the span of a few minutes, and he's not sure why he's so fixated on you. Maybe it's the way you're not afraid to stand your ground against him, or maybe it's the fact that you seem genuinely concerned about his sister's wellbeing. Or maybe it's just the way you look, with your bright eyes and kind smile, and the way you're clearly trying your best to make a difference.

Whatever it is, it's working.

"There is one thing," you say, after what feels like an eternity.

"What?"

You take a deep breath, as if bracing yourself, and meet his eyes.

"I can't raise her grade, but I could offer her some extra credit, if she'd like. It's not a guarantee, and I'd have to see her improvement before I decided to give her the points, but it's an option."

"Yes." The word slips out before he can stop himself, and he mentally curses at his own eagerness.

You arch an eyebrow.

"She'd like that." He clears his throat and forces himself to sound casual, unbothered. "If you're willing."

"Of course." You smile at him, and the warmth that spreads through his chest is...weird. But not unpleasant.

He's not sure what he did to deserve that look, that smile, but he decides he doesn't hate it.

"I'll tell her," he says, and he gets to his feet.

You stand as well, and the height difference between the two of you is not lost on him. He has to look down to meet your eyes, and the way you have to tilt your head up makes him feel strangely amused.

He's used to looking down at people, and most of the time, it makes him feel superior. But right now, he just feels...

Well, he doesn't really know how to describe it.

"Thanks," he says, and the word sounds foreign on his tongue. It's not something he's used to saying, especially to a stranger. He's not even sure what he's thanking you for, exactly, but it feels appropriate.

"You're welcome," you say, a grin on your face that's almost too wide, too bright, too much. "Oh, one more thing."

He hums, and you take a step closer around the desk. You're a foot or so away from him, close enough that he can smell the perfume you use, the floral scent filling his senses. He swallows hard and tries to ignore the way his pulse is racing.

You're not making this easy for him.

"We had a chaperone drop out last minute for the end of the year field trip," you explain. "If you have the time, would you be interested in helping me out? We're going to the spaceport museum."

Crosshair has no interest in a bunch of kids running around a museum, and he's about to decline, but the look on your face stops him.

The pleading look in your eyes, the way your eyebrows are knitted together, the slight pout of your lips. He knows what you're doing, and he doesn't like it. He's not the kind of man who caves to pretty girls asking him for favors, and he's definitely not going to cave now.

He's stronger than this. He can resist the urge. He's a trained soldier, a skilled marksman, and he's not about to give in to the will of a cute teacher.

He's stronger than this.

"I'll do it," he hears himself say.

Fuck.

"Perfect." Your eyes light up, and your smile widens. You're practically beaming, and it's like looking directly at the sun. "I'll send you the details. Thank you, Crosshair. I'll see you soon."

"Yeah," he says, struggling to think of a clever response, but coming up empty. He doesn't have a chance to say anything else before you're practically shoving him out the door.

When he turns back to face you, he sees you wave, and then the door is shut, and you're gone.

The silence of the hallways is suddenly too much, and he has to force himself to take a deep breath.

He's in trouble.

The trip is a nightmare.

It's not your fault. If anything, you've gone above and beyond to keep the kids in line. Crosshair's watched you run after them, chasing them through the exhibit and reminding them that they're not allowed to touch things. And, for the most part, the kids are well-behaved. There are a handful of them that seem to have a problem listening, but you've got the rest under control.

He has to hand it to you. It's impressive, and a little endearing, how hard you're trying. He knows you're exhausted, can see it in the way your shoulders sag when the kids start talking over you, can see it in the way you sigh when one of them pushes their way past you.

But the kids are bored, and he can't blame them. It's a pretty lame field trip, and he doesn't really understand the point of bringing them here. What is a museum, anyway, if not a place to look at cool, old ships?

So far, all they've done is look at boring, historical texts, and listen to you drone on about the importance of space travel and the role its played in storytelling throughout the galaxy.

The whole thing is dull, and he doesn't have the patience for this. He wants to go home and do literally anything else, and if he has to listen to one more kid whine about being bored, he's going to scream.

At least, that's what he tells himself.

Really, he's not bored.

In fact, he's quite the opposite.

He's fascinated.

It's the way you speak, the passion and excitement in your voice. He finds himself watching the way your lips move, the way your eyes sparkle with amusement. It's the same sparkle they had the other night, when he'd confronted you in the classroom. It's the same one that's been haunting him for the past week, and it's the reason why he's stuck here, in a crowded museum, surrounded by dozens of prepubescent teenagers, all while his brothers are back at home, probably having fun without him.

And, as if things weren't already bad enough, you're wearing the cutest outfit he's ever seen. It's a dress, the kind that flows down to your ankles, and it's got tiny flowers all over it. Your hair is pulled up into a high ponytail, tied back with a pink ribbon, and it swishes back and forth as you walk.

Crosshair's not usually one for dresses, and he's definitely not a fan of the color pink. But on you? It works.

It's almost unfair, really.

No, it's extremely unfair.

He's spent the entire day stealing glances at you, trying his best not to be obvious, and Omega is catching onto him. She keeps smirking at him, her eyes narrowed, and he's pretty sure she's been teasing him. He'll get caught staring at you, and she'll elbow him in the ribs and wink at him.

It's annoying, and he hates it.

Not as much as he hates himself, though.

Because he knows better. He knows it's wrong, knows it's stupid, and yet, he can't seem to stop himself.

And the worst part is, you don't even seem to notice. You're so busy trying to keep the kids in check, to keep them from causing a scene, that you're not paying any attention to him. He's grateful for that, because he's not sure how he'd handle the embarrassment.

But, at the same time, he wishes you would look at him. Just once. Just a quick glance, a tiny smile, a small nod. Something.

He sighs.

It's been a long day, and he's tired.

He's standing near the entrance, keeping an eye on the group of students, Omega included. They're currently huddled around a holoexhibit, and he watches as you answer their questions and explain the significance of each ship. You have the patience of a saint, and he has no idea how you do it. The questions they're asking are ridiculous, and a few of them are just flat out wrong.

Crosshair's tempted to go over and tell them how stupid they are, to get them to give you a break, but he refrains. He's not supposed to be getting involved, after all. This is your job, and he's just here to make sure the kids stay safe.

But he's not about to let them cause a scene.

A flash of metal catches his attention, and he frowns. One of the kids, a Rodian, is standing on a platform, and his hand is hovering over a lever. Crosshair doesn't need to read the label to know what the kid is thinking. He's been watching this one eye this exact display all morning, and he's been waiting for him to finally get brave enough to try his luck.

The kid reaches out, and before he can touch the lever, Crosshair strides across the room. He grabs his wrist, his grip firm, and pulls his hand away. The Rodian squawks in surprise, and Crosshair glares down at him. He's not tall, not for a Rodian, and it's easy for Crosshair to loom over him.

"Don't touch that," he growls.

"I-I wasn't gonna," the kid stammers, and his eyes dart towards the exit. He looks ready to bolt, and Crosshair would find it funny if it weren't for the way the rest of the kids are staring at him.

"Bullshit."

"Language," you scold, and Crosshair turns his head to see you approaching him, an exasperated look on your face. You have your hands on your hips, and you look like you're ready to lecture him instead of the kid who was about to activate the simulator without permission.

He raises an eyebrow at you, challenging you.

"You shouldn't swear in front of children," you say, your tone matter-of-fact.

"Well, maybe they shouldn't touch shit that's not theirs," he retorts, and he shoots the kid a pointed look.

"Crosshair!"

You're glaring at him now, and he knows he should feel bad, but he doesn't. He can't. Your cheeks are flushed, and your brows are furrowed, and you're trying so hard to look stern and serious, but it's not working. He's not sure why, but seeing you angry is a lot more appealing than it should be.

It makes him want to push your buttons.

"If I catch you touching this again, I'll throw you out," he warns the kid, and he lets go of his wrist. "Got it?"

The kid nods, and then he's dashing back to the rest of the group, a look of fear on his face.

"What is wrong with you?" you demand, and Crosshair looks down at you, fighting the urge to smirk. You're still glaring at him, but the flush on your cheeks is a shade darker now, and he can't help but feel a little proud of himself.

"I'm just doing my job," he says, and the smirk he'd been fighting is making its way onto his face now.

Your eyes widen. "Your job is to make sure the kids are safe, not threaten them."

"I wasn't threatening him," he scoffs.

"Yes, you were."

"No, I wasn't."

"Yes, you—"

"Okay, fine, maybe I was. A little," he admits, and you shake your head, a huff escaping you. The glare falls away, and the look on your face is softer now, a little less annoyed, and a lot more amused.

"I had it handled," you tell him, and there's a hint of teasing in your tone now, too.

"Yeah, it looked like it."

"Crosshair," you warn, but the corners of your lips are twitching upwards, betraying the seriousness of your voice.

"What? I'm just trying to help," he says, and the shrug he gives is a little more smug than it should be.

Crosshair isn't trying to antagonize you, not really. He's just...testing the waters, he supposes. Seeing how far he can push you, seeing how much you can take before you crack, and he has to admit that you're holding up pretty well so far. Most people would've told him off, or stormed off by now, but not you.

No, you're still here.

You're standing in front of him, your arms folded across your chest, trying your very best not to smile at him.

You're enjoying this.

The realization hits him like a punch to the gut, and he has to force himself to breathe normally. He's not sure why that's such a revelation, but it is. You're enjoying his company, enjoying the back-and-forth, and it makes him feel lighter than air.

"Are you always this much of an ass?" you ask, and his eyes widen at the sudden vulgarity, but he recovers quickly. He likes it, actually. The bluntness, the honesty. It's refreshing, and a lot more than he expected from you.

Crosshair smirks. "Now who's swearing in front of children?"

"They're not paying attention."

"Oh, right, because the exhibit on the history of intergalactic trade is so exciting," he says, and you snort, shaking your head.

"Yeah, you're not wrong," you admit, and he chuckles.

"I know."

"Of course you do," you mutter sarcastically. But, the annoyance has faded, and there's a smile on your face as you turn to look at the kids, so Crosshair considers it a win.

You stand there, next to him, your arms folded, and you watch as the kids slowly make their way through the exhibit. They're talking among themselves, completely oblivious to the exchange between the two of you. It's a bit of a relief, because he's not sure what they would make of the fact that he's flirting with their teacher.

Is he flirting?

No, that's not right.

He's not flirting.

He's just being...friendly. He's just making conversation, and there's nothing wrong with that. It's not his fault that you're easy to talk to.

Omega is the only one looking in his direction, and he doesn't miss the grin on her face. He shoots her a look, a warning, and she winks at him. He glares, and she sticks her tongue out.

Great.

He's definitely going to hear about this later.

"You're not exactly what I was expecting," you say quietly. 

Crosshair looks back at you, his heart skipping a beat when he realizes just how close you are. You're standing next to him, shoulder to shoulder, and you're looking up at him, the same sparkle in your eyes as before. There’s a hint of a smile on your lips, and you seem...pleased.

"Is that a good thing or a bad thing?" he asks, and he's almost afraid to know the answer.

"A good thing, of course." You nudge him playfully with your elbow, and the touch sends a jolt of electricity up his arm. "I'm glad I was wrong."

"Yeah, me too."

You laugh at that, and he smiles, more than a little pleased with himself. It's an unexpected, but pleasant, reaction, and he finds himself wanting to make you laugh again.

"Anyway," you say, taking a step back. "Thanks for keeping the kids in line. I really appreciate it."

He shrugs. "It's nothing."

"No, really." You look up at him, your eyes bright, and you give him a sympathetic smile. "I know this isn't exactly what you signed up for."

"It's not so bad."

You raise an eyebrow, clearly skeptical.

"I mean, it's boring as hell," he admits, and the way your nose scrunches up as you laugh is adorable. He clears his throat and tries to focus. "But it's not awful. The company's...bearable."

You tilt your head to the side, and your eyes narrow. "Thanks, I think."

"Don't mention it."

"So," you start, a slight hesitation in your voice, "does this mean you're not going to file a complaint against me?"

"I wouldn't go that far," Crosshair teases. The way your eyes widen is enough to make him chuckle. "But I guess I can let it slide. For now."

"For now," you repeat, and you let out a breath. You shake your head and look up at him, the ghost of a smile on your lips. "Well, I'll take it. Now, let's get back to the kids, shall we?"

"After you," he says, gesturing for you to lead the way.

He follows after you, and he tries his best not to stare at the sway of your hips as you walk. He fails, but only a little bit.

And, if he catches you glancing back at him every so often, well, he's not complaining.

Omega is practically bouncing on her heels as they make their way down the street, heading home from the school. She's talking a mile a minute, her eyes bright, and she's still somehow full of energy despite the long day they've had. Crosshair can't quite keep up with her, and he's having trouble focusing on her words. He has no idea how you manage to do this every day, and he feels a little bad for thinking that teaching is an easy job.

She's going on about the trip, how much fun she had, and she's not slowing down. Crosshair doesn't mind, though. He's content to listen to her, and he's not going to stop her from gushing about her day. He does the same thing for her he’s always done for Tech, humming and nodding in the right places, and he knows that it makes her feel good to talk.

Besides, he's too distracted by his own thoughts to focus on what she's saying.

He's spent the last hour replaying the events of the day in his mind, trying to make sense of everything. The way you'd looked at him, the way you'd laughed, the way you'd teased him. It's all a little overwhelming, and he's not sure how to process it.

Crosshair isn't the kind of person who gets all worked up over a pretty girl. He’s not even the kind of person who gets all worked up, period.

But something about you, the way you carry yourself, the way you smile, the way you look at him. It's different.

You're different.

He doesn't know what to do with that information, and he's not sure he likes it. For all he knows, you're just being nice, just trying to be polite so he doesn’t give you a hard time. It wouldn't be the first time someone's done that.

Crosshair has been told his whole life that he's difficult to deal with, and he's learned to live with that. He's used to people being afraid of him, and he's used to people not wanting to be around him. He used to take pride in the fact that people were scared of him, but lately, it's started to wear on him.

Maybe it's because of his brothers, the way they've started to change, the way they've become softer. Or maybe it's because of Omega, the way she looks up to him, the way she trusts him, the way she thinks he's capable of great things.

Either way, he can't deny that he's a little lonely.

And maybe a little curious.

"Crosshair," Omega says, and the sharpness in her voice catches his attention. She's stopped walking, and she's giving him a look, her eyes narrowed. "Are you even listening to me?"

"Huh?" He blinks, and then he frowns. "Yeah, of course."

"Then, what did I just say?" she challenges, her hands on her hips, her head tilted up.

He pauses, and then sighs. "No, not really."

"I knew it!" she exclaims, throwing her hands up. "You were totally spacing out."

"I was not."

"Yes, you were," she argues, and she crosses her arms over her chest. "What were you thinking about?"

"Nothing."

"Really? Because you look like you're thinking about something."

"Nope," he lies. Crosshair turns his head away from her, pretending to look at something else. There's a few vendors pulling in their stands in front of them, closing up for the evening, and he watches them, trying to avoid Omega's gaze. The florist is packing up his display, and the bright, colorful flowers draw his attention. He tries to ignore the fact that they remind him of your dress.

"Are you sure? You seem...weird."

"I'm fine."

"Are you thinking about the field trip?" she asks, and he can hear the smugness in her voice. "About Miss—"

"Omega." He snaps his head back towards her, his eyes wide, and he gives her a warning look.

"What?" she says, feigning innocence, and he groans.

"Just drop it," he mutters, and he turns to keep walking.

"I can't," she says, following after him. She has to jog slightly to keep up with his hurried pace, but it does nothing to deter her. "You like her."

"Of course I like her. She’s nice,” he replies. His tone comes out more defensive than casual, and he grimaces internally.

"No, you really like her."

Crosshair opens his mouth, ready to defend himself. There's no way that's true. It's impossible. He barely knows you, and you're just his sister's teacher. 

Just a pretty, sweet, kind teacher who cares about her students and isn't afraid to push the boundaries to help them learn. Who didn't back down when he challenged her, and didn't hesitate to stand her ground when he was being an ass. 

Who smiles at him and looks at him like he's worth something, like he's important, like he matters. Who laughs at his pathetic attempts at humor and makes him feel like he's not a complete waste of space, like maybe there's something worthwhile inside of him after all. Like maybe, just maybe, there's a chance for him.

Shit.

He shakes his head. "You're crazy."

"Am not," she insists, and she skips in front of him, forcing him to stop. "I won't tell anyone."

"Omega—"

"You know, she's single," she continues with a knowing, smug grin, and it reminds him so much of Hunter that he has to take a deep breath and count to ten before he can speak again. And even then, he's still annoyed.

"How the hell do you know that?" he demands, his eyebrows raised.

"I overheard her talking to the other teachers during lunch," she explains, and the smugness fades, replaced by a sheepish smile.

"You shouldn't eavesdrop," he chastises, though he's a little too preoccupied with the new information to put much force behind the words.

"I didn't mean to," she says with a shrug. "I was looking for her, and I found her, and they were talking about her, so..."

"So, what else did you hear?" he asks, trying his best to sound disinterested.

"Nothing."

"Omega," he warns.

"I didn't hear anything!" she insists, her eyes wide. After a beat, a smirk forms on her face, and her eyes narrow. "Why? Did you want to know something else?"

"No," he snaps, a little too quickly. "Just forget it."

"But—"

"It's not important," he says, cutting her off as he steps around her and continues walking. He hears her groan in frustration, and he smirks to himself. Serves her right.

"Wait!" She hurries after him, her hands gripping the strap of her bag tightly as she catches up. She's practically running now, trying her best to match his long strides, and her breathing is a little heavier than normal. "Crosshair, slow down."

"No."

She huffs. "I'm just saying—"

"Omega, enough."

"I think she likes you, too."

Crosshair stops walking abruptly, and Omega almost collides with him. He turns his head towards her, his eyebrows raised, and she takes a step back.

"What makes you say that?" he asks. He knows he's being foolish, letting her bait him like this, but he can't help himself. The hopeful note in her voice is hard to ignore, and he's suddenly feeling a lot more optimistic than he should.

"Because she kept looking at you," she explains.

"No, she didn't."

"Yes, she did," she argues. "She was looking at you, like, the entire time. The whole trip. I'm surprised you didn't notice."

"You're exaggerating," he mutters, trying to hide the flush in his cheeks.

"I'm not," she says, shaking her head. "I was keeping track."

"You know, if you paid half as much attention to your schoolwork as you do to gossiping, neither of us would be in this mess," he retorts.

"Hey! That's not true," Omega pouts. "I learned everything I need to know about intergalactic trade from Tech. I'm good."

Crosshair can't help but smile at that, and Omega grins back at him. They start walking again, this time a little slower, and she reaches for his hand, grabbing hold of his fingers.

"But you like her, right?" she asks, tilting her head up at him.

"She's...nice," he admits, and the look on her face tells him that's not enough. He sighs and rubs the back of his neck with his prosthetic hand. "I don't know. Maybe."

"You should ask her out."

"Yeah, I don't think that's a good idea," he mutters, shaking his head.

"Why not?"

"I don't know. I barely know her."

"So? Just get to know her," Omega says, and he sighs.

"It's not that simple."

"Why not?"

"Because..." Crosshair hesitates, trying to think of a reason. The truth is, he's never really had to deal with this kind of situation. He's not exactly the best when it comes to social interactions, and his history with romantic relationships is...limited. It's not something he's ever bothered to think about, but now that it's staring him in the face, he feels woefully unprepared.

"What if she says no?"

"Well, what if she says yes?"

Crosshair doesn't respond. If he's being honest, he hadn't even considered the possibility of you saying yes. He'd been so focused on the negative outcome, the embarrassment, the awkwardness, that he'd completely forgotten about the other side of the equation. What if you did say yes? What would he do then? Would he be happy? Relieved? Or would he be even more nervous than before?

"I don't know," he finally admits.

"You should ask her," Omega urges. "At least, think about it."

"Maybe," he says, and she frowns, clearly not satisfied with the answer. He sighs, and then gives her hand a squeeze. "I'll think about it."

"Okay," she grumbles, and the two of them continue walking, falling into a comfortable silence. It's quiet between them all the way to the front door, and he's almost home free, his hand hovering over the sensor pad, when Omega speaks up.

"I'm just saying," she starts, and he groans, "you should go for it."

"I'm done having this conversation," he grumbles as he tugs her inside, slamming the door behind him. He can hear voices coming from the kitchen, and he freezes, holding fast to her wrist.

"You have to promise not to tell them."

"Okay, okay, I promise," she says, rolling her eyes, and she tugs her arm away.

"No, not okay," he says. "If you tell them, I'll kill you."

"Okay, fine," she huffs, and he narrows his eyes at her.

"I'm serious," he says, his tone low, threatening. It doesn't work on Omega, not anymore, and she just looks up at him, unbothered.

"So am I."

"Fine." Crosshair sighs, deflating, and then, before he can stop himself, the words are spilling out. "So, what do I do?"

Omega's face lights up, a grin so wide it nearly splits her face in two, and he regrets the question almost instantly. "I'll help you."

"What?"

"I'll help you," she repeats.

"You're kidding," he deadpans.

"No," she says, shaking her head. "I have a great idea. Trust me."

"Omega—"

"I promise, you won't regret it," she says, and then, she's gone, dashing off towards the kitchen where Hunter and Wrecker are arguing about dinner.

Crosshair watches her go, and then, with a groan, he drags his hand over his face.

What has he gotten himself into?

The next few weeks are a blur. Omega's been keeping him busy, asking him to help her with homework, walking her to and from school, and the whole time, he's wondering when she's going to bring up her big plan.

She managed to get a score high enough on her extra credit in your class to pull her grade up, and Hunter nearly fell over when he found out. You'd sent a letter home with her, letting them know how impressed you were, and both Hunter and Wrecker wouldn't shut up about it for days. Omega's been bragging about it, too, and Crosshair's heard her go on about how smart and amazing and brilliant and perfect you are, over and over again.

She hasn't brought up her big plan again, though, and Crosshair's grateful. She has, however, started dropping hints here and there, meddling in ways that she shouldn't, and it's getting old, fast. 

He's already had to stop her from inviting you over for dinner, twice, and he's not sure how much longer he can keep her from blowing his cover. More than once, Omega's forgotten her datapad at home, and he's had to drop everything to run it to the school. It's a pain in the ass, but at least it gives him an excuse to see you.

And he sees you, a lot more than he should.

He tries not to get too excited about it, tries not to think too hard about what it means, but it's impossible. Omega's made it her mission to get the two of you alone together, and he can't help but feel a bit like a pawn in her scheme, one that she refuses to share with him. Not that it matters, because it's working.

You're talking to him.

In fact, the two of you have spent so much time together over the last few weeks, that it's almost weird when he doesn't see you. Every morning, when he drops Omega off at school, he makes sure to walk her inside. You're always there, and he doesn't miss the way you look up when the door opens or the way you smile when you see him. You're usually sitting at your desk, grading papers, or helping a student, and he's quick to leave before anyone notices how long he's standing there. 

But every once in a while, when he's lucky, you're standing at the front of the room, and the two of you are able to exchange a few words. It's nothing too special, and it's not as if you're exchanging life stories or anything, but it's enough. It's more than he could've hoped for, and it's better than the alternative, which is absolutely nothing. He even brought you coffee one day, after you'd stayed late to work on a project with Omega, and you'd blushed.

Blushed.

For him.

Crosshair would be lying if he said he hadn't enjoyed that. It's nice, having someone to talk to, and it's nice, being able to see you smile. Even if it's only for a minute or two, and even if his brothers are constantly giving him shit for it.

He's not an idiot. He knows they're all watching him, waiting to see how this plays out, and he's doing his best not to give them any ammunition. Omega's already told him, several times, that they're rooting for him, and he's not sure how to feel about that. The last thing he needs is everyone butting into his business, and he's hoping that Omega will keep her word and keep her mouth shut.

He's not going to say anything, not until he's absolutely sure. And, even then, he'll probably wait. The only problem is, he's almost certain he's run out of time.

Crosshair has been keeping a mental countdown, counting down the days until Omega's finished with school, and it's come up a lot sooner than he'd expected. The semester is over, and it's officially summer vacation, which means you're no longer Omega's teacher. And with that, comes an end to whatever small shred of hope he'd had that something might happen, that whatever plan Omega had in mind would work, and the two of you would end up together.

Which is fine.

Really, it's fine.

He's not hurt. He's not disappointed. He's not anything. He doesn't care, not one bit, and he definitely isn't sulking, not at all, because that would be ridiculous.

It's just a crush. A silly, stupid, fleeting thing, and it's not worth getting upset about. It's not like anything would've happened between the two of you. You're way out of his league, and he knows that.

But still.

He can't deny that he misses the daily interaction, the brief exchanges, the occasional smiles. He can't deny that he'd enjoyed it, and now that it's over, he feels a little lost. 

He jumped at the chance to go to the summer festival with everyone, partly because he didn't want to be home alone, and partly because he was hoping to run into you there. Which is stupid, and foolish, and pathetic, but he can't help himself. He'd overheard you telling Omega that you'd be there, and it's the closest thing he has to a sign, and so, he's taking it.

Besides, Hunter practically ordered him to go, so it's not like he had a choice.

So, here he is, standing off to the side, watching the rest of the family enjoying themselves. It's still early, and the real festivities won't begin until the sun starts to set, but everyone is already in a good mood. He tries his best not to ruin it with his attitude, but he knows he's doing a shitty job of it, and it doesn't help that they're teasing him relentlessly.

"You're moping."

Crosshair sighs and rolls his eyes as Hunter bumps him with his elbow. He's been standing next to him, staring out into the crowd, and he doesn't turn his head when his brother speaks.

"No, I'm not," he replies.

"Yes, you are," Hunter says. He takes a sip of his drink, and then, nudges him again. "Is this about your girlfriend?"

"Shut up," Crosshair grumbles, and he elbows him back, a little harder than necessary. Some of Hunter’s drink spills, and he feels a small flash of satisfaction.

"Ow."

"Leave me alone," he says, and Hunter snorts.

"No, I'm not gonna do that," Hunter says, a hint of amusement in his voice. "It's too easy."

Crosshair groans, and turns his head away, trying his best to ignore him. It doesn't work.

"Come on, just ask her out," Hunter urges, and Crosshair glares at him.

He can hear Wrecker snickering behind him, and when he turns around, the look on his face tells him everything he needs to know. He must've been listening in the whole time.

"What's the worst that could happen?" Hunter continues.

"I could make an idiot out of myself," Crosshair replies.

"So? You already do that every day," Wrecker jokes, and he winces when Hunter smacks him.

"Not helping," Hunter mutters, and Wrecker just shrugs.

"Look," Hunter says, turning back towards him, "if she says no, at least you'll know, and you can stop worrying about it."

Crosshair doesn't respond, too caught up in the sight of you weaving your way through the crowd. You're wearing a sundress, a cute little thing that ends just above your knees, and a flower crown sitting atop of your head, and he can't take his eyes off of you. 

You're walking with Omega's art teacher, a Rutian Twi’Lek laden with jewelry, talking and gesturing animatedly. She has her hands full with decorations for the festival, and you're trying to help, but she keeps shooing you away. He can see the pout on your face, and he can't help but smile, just a little, and then you turn your head and catch Crosshair staring.

He doesn't have time to look away.

He doesn't even have time to try.

Instead, he watches, frozen, as your eyes lock with his. Your face lights up, a bright smile on your lips, and you wave at him. He feels his hand lift in acknowledgement despite himself, and he can't stop the way his lips quirk up into a half-smile. 

He can see Omega trailing after the two of you, a stack of posters in her hands, and she's saying something, but he can't hear her. The only thing he can hear is his heart pounding in his ears, and the only thing he can see is you, your face flushed, and a look in your eyes that's far too soft for him to know what to do with.

"Wow," Hunter says, breaking the spell, and he blinks, the image of you in front of him fading, replaced by his brother's annoying smirk.

"What?"

"I knew you liked her, but I didn't know it was this bad," Hunter says.

"Oh, come on," Wrecker teases, a big grin spreading across his face. "He's in love."

Crosshair can't stop the growl of frustration that leaves him, and the sound makes his brothers laugh. He wants to shove them, or punch them, or something, but he doesn't have the chance.

You’re walking over.

You're heading in their direction, and Crosshair panics, unsure of what to do. He doesn't know how to be anything other than aloof and rude, and he's afraid he'll say something stupid and embarrass himself. He doesn't want to mess this up, and he's terrified he'll ruin everything if he says the wrong thing.

He looks at Hunter, a desperate plea in his eyes, but his brother is no help. Instead, he just smirks and shrugs, nudging Wrecker.

"We should go check on Omega," he says, his tone is casual. "C'mon, Wrecker."

Wrecker doesn't argue, and he doesn't hesitate, following Hunter without a word. Before he can blink, they're gone, and it's just the two of you. Crosshair's not sure if it's better or worse.

"Hi," you say, your voice soft as you come to a stop in front of him.

Your cheeks are flushed, and you're fidgeting. He finds it endearing, and the fact that you're just as flustered as he is makes him feel a little bit better.

"Hey," he says, his voice coming out a bit raspier than he'd intended. He clears his throat, and then nods towards your companion. "Are you having fun?"

You tilt your head and look back over your shoulder, and Crosshair doesn't miss the slight roll of your eyes.

"Yeah, I'm having a blast," you deadpan, and he can't help but laugh. He's grown used to your particular brand of sarcasm over the past few weeks, the kind that only seems to come out when he's around, and he's come to enjoy the way it sounds when it's aimed at someone else.

"Don't worry," he says, "we can be miserable together."

"Well, that's not very festive," you reply, and there's a teasing edge to your voice. "What did the festival ever do to you?"

"Nothing, I just don't like people."

"Fair enough," you say with a laugh. "So, what brings you here?"

"Omega."

"Ah." You nod, and a soft smile forms on your face. "Of course. She told me you'll be helping us out later. Thanks, by the way."

Crosshair raises an eyebrow.

This is news to him.

"Uh, yeah," he says slowly, his eyes narrowing. "What did she say, exactly?"

"She said you'd be helping with the games." You tilt your head and look up at him, confusion in your eyes. "Is that...not true?"

He stares back at you, unsure of what to say. He's never agreed to anything like that, and the idea of working with children is...unappealing, to say the least. He can't imagine why Omega would've said that.

The realization hits him, and his eyes widen.

That little brat.

She set him up.

She's been planning this, and he was too distracted with moping to realize it. He'd let her walk all over him, and now, he's going to have to play along. Because there's no way in hell he's going to tell you the truth, not now, not when you're looking up at him, expectant and hopeful.

"Yeah, no," he lies, shaking his head. "She's right. I'll be there."

"Great," you say, and he's pretty sure you actually mean it. "I'm running the scavenger hunt. And, if you wanted, I could use a partner."

Crosshair blinks, brain stuttering over the word partner, and he must look like an idiot, because you start to backtrack.

"But, you probably have better things to do. I'm sure there's someone else who would love to help. I just thought—"

"No, no, I'll help," he interrupts, and you stop, giving him a grateful look.

"Really?"

"Yeah."

Your smile is so bright, so radiant, that it makes his heart ache. He can't remember the last time someone was this happy to spend time with him. He's not used to feeling wanted, and the knowledge that you enjoy his company fills him with a sense of pride he's not quite prepared for.

"But," he starts, his eyebrows raised, "you owe me."

"I know, I know," you say with a laugh. "Anything you want."

"I'm serious," he insists, though the smirk on his face betrays his words. "I'm doing this under duress. I'm being held against my will."

"I'll make it worth your while," you tease, and the way your eyes flash, the playful look in them, is almost enough to make him forget how to breathe. He tries not to focus on it, tries not to dwell on the way his mind immediately goes to some very interesting places, but it's a losing battle. He's sure his cheeks are red, and the knowing look in your eyes doesn't help.

"Uh," he says, his voice strangled, and he has to clear his throat again before he can continue. "Good.”

"Good," you repeat, and the smile on your face turns shy. You take a step back, and then another, and the look in your eyes is...different, softer, and a little more vulnerable. It makes his stomach twist. "Well, I should probably go. But, I'll see you later, right?"

He nods, and you grin. You wave goodbye and walk away, and Crosshair watches you go, a small smile on his face. He shakes his head and rolls his eyes at himself, but he can't stop smiling. It's a dumb thing to be happy about, but it's nice, knowing that you're looking forward to seeing him. And the way you'd looked at him, the hopeful look in your eyes, the shyness, the blush on your cheeks. He can't stop thinking about it.

It's just a crush, and it'll go away eventually. It's just a silly little thing, and it'll fade away. You'll be gone, and he'll be left behind, and everything will go back to normal. He'll get over it.

But, as he stands there, watching you laugh and smile and talk to the others, the sight of you making him feel things that he's not quite ready to admit, he can't help but wonder if maybe, just maybe, he doesn't want it to.

By the time the sun sets, the courtyard is packed. The vendors have all set up their stalls, the games have begun, and the music is blaring. Crosshair stays close to Wrecker, using his bulk to help him avoid the crowds, and does his best to ignore the children running around. Wrecker's not much help. He keeps wandering off, getting distracted by the food or the games, and Crosshair is left to wander around alone.

It's not all bad, though.

He's able to keep an eye on Omega, and that's enough to keep him occupied. He knows she can take care of herself, but it's hard for him to relax when she's not within eyesight. And, every once in a while, you catch his eye. You're busy, running from place to place, and he knows that you don't have time to stop and chat, but the small, shy smiles that you give him are enough to put him at ease.

It's a nice distraction, and it helps him stay focused, which is a good thing. Because, before he knows it, it's time for the scavenger hunt. Omega drags him over to the table where you’re waiting, and he can't help but smile at the enthusiasm in your voice.

"I'm so glad you could make it," you say, and the look in your eyes tells him that you really mean it.

At his side, Omega looks far too proud of herself. Crosshair narrows his eyes at her, and she gives him a toothy grin in return.

"Me too," he mutters, and you laugh.

"Come on," you say, grabbing a basket from the table. "Let's get started."

Crosshair nods, and he stands back as you hand out datapads and explain rules to the crowd that’s formed around them. He's not paying attention. He's watching you, listening to your voice, enjoying the way you look in the light of Pabu’s setting sun, and it's a nice moment. That is, until Omega elbows him, and he startles.

"What?"

“She likes you," she whispers conspiratorially, her hand cupped over her mouth.

"Shut up," he hisses.

Omega giggles, and he glares at her, but it does nothing to wipe the smirk from her face.

"I'm not talking to you," he growls.

"Yeah, you are," she says, her voice laced with amusement. “You’re welcome, by the way.”

Before he can say anything, you announce that the scavenger hunt has started, and the kids are off. Omega joins the crowd, and soon, she's lost among the swarm of children running past them. Crosshair watches her go, his eyebrows furrowed, and then, he turns his attention to you.

You're smiling, waving at the kids, and he can't take his eyes off of you. This was a bad idea. He should've said no. He should've done something, anything, but instead, he'd let himself get roped into helping, and now, he's standing here, watching you, wishing he had the courage to just say something, and it's driving him crazy.

"Thanks again for helping," you say, turning towards him, and he startles, caught off guard.

"Uh, yeah, no problem," he replies. "I was going to be here anyway."

"Yeah, Omega mentioned that."

Crosshair nods, and the two of you settle into an awkward silence. He shifts on his feet, his hands shoved in his pockets, and he stares out into the crowd. You're quiet beside him, and the longer the silence lasts, the more uncomfortable he becomes.

It's not like you to be so quiet. Usually, you're chatting his ear off, asking him questions, trying to get him to open up, and the fact that you haven't said a word is concerning. You’re shuffling datapads and small trinkets around as if looking for something to keep yourself busy, and he's starting to wonder if he's done something wrong.

He's trying not to worry about it, but the longer the silence stretches, the more his mind races. He knows he's overthinking, and the more he thinks about it, the more anxious he becomes.

It's just a crush, he reminds himself.

He doesn't want anything from you. He doesn't need anything from you. He doesn't expect anything from you. But, as he stands there, trying not to dwell on the way his heart is racing, the way his stomach is twisting, the way his breath catches in his throat, he can't help but feel like a bit of an idiot.

He can't help but wonder if you've figured him out. 

Maybe you know, and that's why you're acting so strange. Maybe you can tell, and you're waiting for him to make the first move. Maybe you're nervous, or maybe, you just don't want him to say anything, because you don't feel the same way, and that's why you're keeping your distance. He knows that's a long shot, but it doesn't stop his brain from fixating on the thought. He can't help but think about how much worse it'll be if you do know.

So, he stands there, and the silence stretches on, tension thick in the air as you cast glances at each other. 

It's not until a couple of kids come up and ask for help with the next clue that the tension breaks.

The two of them are young, maybe eight or nine, and they're struggling. They're a cute pair, brother and sister, and they remind him a lot of his siblings. Their parents are nowhere in sight, and they're arguing, bickering, and it’s not until you crouch down to speak to them, taking the datapad from the boy's hands, that they calm down. You explain the next clue to them, and Crosshair watches as the siblings nod, their faces lighting up with understanding.

He wants to keep watching you, but a second pair of kids approach, and then a third. He can see you’re starting to get overwhelmed, and so he picks up a datapad and gets to work.

Soon, the two of you have a rhythm. You help the younger kids while he helps the older ones, and the system seems to work. He finds himself enjoying the task, and he doesn't even realize that an hour has passed until the scavenger hunt is over and the sun has nearly set. The two of you gather up the datapads, and the kids line up in front of the table, ready to receive their prize.

They're all so excited, and they're smiling and laughing and cheering, and it's a nice sight. Crosshair has never been the biggest fan of children, but these ones aren’t so bad.

He doesn't even realize that he's smiling until Omega runs back over to him, her arms outstretched, and she flings herself at him. She grabs hold of his waist, and she squeezes him tight.

"Thanks for helping," she says, her voice muffled, and he has to swallow past the lump in his throat.

"No problem," he replies as she lets go. She's still grinning at him, her eyes bright, and he can't help but reach out and ruffle her hair. "How'd you do?"

"I won," she boasts and slaps his hand away, and he rolls his eyes, unable to keep from smirking.

"Of course you did."

"It wasn't easy," Omega continues, her eyebrows raising as she speaks slowly. "But I had a great partner."

Crosshair sighs, and he gives her a knowing look, which she ignores.

“Don’t screw this up,” she whispers, and then, before he can say anything, she turns on her heel and heads back towards the others.

You're still sitting at the table, and he takes a moment to compose himself before heading over. You're organizing the datapads, sorting them into a bag, and he takes a seat next to you.

"Thanks for the help," you say, and he nods, a hint of a smile on his lips.

"Not a problem."

"You did a good job," you tell him. He ducks his head, a faint blush coloring his cheeks as you continue, “You’re good with them.”

"Well, you're welcome," he says, his voice low. "I have a lot of practice dealing with little brats."

You laugh, and the sound makes his heart swell. You continue sorting the datapads, and he watches you work, his eyes trailing over your features. It's not until you clear your throat that he realizes how long he's been staring.

"So, um," he begins, trying not to think too hard about the fact that he's been caught. "I was thinking..."

You look up. "Yeah?"

"You owe me."

"Huh?"

"You said anything I want," he explains, and the confusion on your face clears.

"Right," you reply, a smirk tugging at the corner of your lips. You stop what you’re doing and turn to face him fully. "And what would that be?"

"Dinner.”

"Dinner?" you repeat, your eyebrows raised, and he nods.

"With me."

"Are you asking me on a date, Crosshair?"

"Yeah," he says, and his heart leaps into his throat when your eyes light up. "I'm asking you on a date."

"Oh," you say, a soft smile on your lips, and he can't help but mirror it. "Well, how could I say no?"

"Great," he replies, and then, after a pause, he asks, "is that a yes?"

"Yes, of course it's a yes,” you chuckle. You shake your head, and then, a teasing smile forms on your face. "Did you think I was gonna say no?"

"Uh," he says, rubbing the back of his neck. "I was prepared for it."

You snort, and the laughter that follows is almost enough to distract him from the way his cheeks are burning. Almost. He looks away, embarrassed, but he can't help but smile.

"Sorry," you say, stifling your laughter, and he shrugs.

"It's fine."

"No, no, I'm not laughing at you," you say. You're biting your lip, trying to stop yourself from smiling, and his eyes narrow. "It's just..."

"What?"

"This whole time," you begin, and you have to bite back another laugh. "I've been trying to figure out how to ask you out."

"Wait, what?"

"Yeah," you admit, and the shy smile on your face is almost too much for him to handle. He can't believe what he's hearing. "I've been waiting for an excuse to spend some time alone with you, but I couldn't think of anything. So, when Omega mentioned you'd be helping out, I figured it would be my chance."

Crosshair shakes his head, trying to process the words. It's a lot to take in. You've been trying to ask him out? All this time, he's been wondering, worrying, and it was all for nothing? You've wanted this, too?

"Oh," is all he can manage, and it's enough to make you laugh again.

"Yeah."

He doesn't know what to say, so he stays silent. You shift next to him, and you place your hand on his arm, the contact sending sparks through his skin. Your touch is light, but it makes his breath catch, and he doesn't miss the way you smile at his reaction.

“So, do you want to watch the fireworks with me?” you ask, your voice soft.

"Yeah, sure," he says. He's trying not to let his excitement show, but judging by the grin on your face, he's not doing a very good job of it.

"Good."

He's expecting you to let go of his arm, but instead, you slide your hand down, and your fingers brush against his, a subtle gesture that makes his heart race. He turns his hand palm up, and you slide yours into it, your touch warm and gentle. His fingers curl around yours, and the smile on your face makes him feel bold.

Crosshair stands, pulling you up with him, and the two of you walk to the edge of the courtyard, hand in hand. It’s quiet now, save for the music playing over the speakers and the soft murmur of conversation, and the sky is dark. There are only a few people left nearby, mostly parents picking up their children, and no one pays the two of you any mind. You squeeze his hand, and he squeezes back, a smile forming on his face.

You lead him down a set of steps, and the two of you make your way towards a spot overlooking the bay. The breeze is cool, and the smell of salt fills the air. Without the lanterns and torches and strings of lights, it's dark, and he can just barely see your face, illuminated by the soft glow of the moon.

There’s a tree behind you, and it offers a bit of privacy, and the two of you settle against it, sitting on the grass. He can see the bay spread out in front of them, and the waves crashing on the beach, a steady rhythm that helps slow his racing heartbeat. 

He's still holding your hand, and he gives it another squeeze. You lean against him, resting your head on his shoulder, and the two of you watch as the fireworks begin. The explosions are loud, and bright, and colorful, and you point out the best ones, and the ones that remind you of him, and the ones that make you laugh. And, as the fireworks continue, as the colors fill the sky, you lean closer, and he pulls you into his arms.

He's not sure how long it lasts, but the longer the fireworks go on, the closer you get, and the more content he becomes. You're sitting between his legs, leaning back against his chest, and his arms are wrapped around you, holding you close.

You turn your head, the movement catching his eye. Your eyes meet his, and the two of you stare at each other, and the fireworks fade away, forgotten.

"Hey," he whispers, and the corner of your mouth twitches.

"Hey."

"This is nice," he says, his voice low.

"Yeah, it is."

You shift, turning towards him, and your face is so close that he can feel your breath on his lips. He knows he should wait, should give you a chance to change your mind, should give himself a chance to talk himself out of it, but he can't. 

"I—"

"Yes," you interrupt, a mischievous glint in your eyes, and he has to laugh.

"You don't even know what I'm going to say," he teases, and you shrug.

"I'm sure it's something good," you say. You reach up, cupping his cheek with your free hand. "Whatever it is, the answer is yes."

He can't stop the smile that forms on his face. He doesn't even try. He just leans in, closing the gap between the two of you, and he kisses you, a soft press of his lips against yours. He feels you sigh against his mouth, and his eyes flutter closed as he loses himself in the kiss.

The fireworks are still going off, but he can barely hear them, and the cheers and laughter and music are distant, a soft hum that fades away. All he can focus on is the feel of your lips against his, the warmth of your body pressed against his, and the soft sound of your breathing.

He feels you smile, and his heart races, and he has to pull back to catch his breath. He opens his eyes, and he's met with the sight of you, your face flushed, and the most beautiful smile he's ever seen.

"That was nice," you say softly, and he scoffs.

“Just nice?" he asks, half-joking and half-serious. He’s just had the best kiss of his life, and if you think it was just nice, then he's got some work to do.

"Well, maybe it was a little more than nice," you tease. The look in your eyes has him leaning in again, his gaze drifting from your eyes to your lips and back.

"Only a little?"

"Yeah, a little."

"Hmm, well, let's try that again," he murmurs, and you laugh, a soft breath against his lips.

"Alright."

Crosshair kisses you again, and this time, the kiss is deeper, slower, and more deliberate. His hands find their way to your hips, pulling you onto his lap, and you don't hesitate to follow his lead. He runs his tongue along your lower lip, and when you moan into his mouth, he feels a thrill rush through him.

Your hands are on his shoulders, and you're straddling his lap as you kiss him back, matching his pace. The feel of your tongue sliding against, and the soft whimper you make when he bites down on your bottom lip, nearly drives him crazy. He grips your hips, and he tugs you closer, the pressure of your weight against him drawing a groan from his mouth into yours. It’s a sound so low and raw that it surprises him, but you don’t seem taken aback by it. If anything, you seem pleased, and it suddenly occurs to him that there’s a lot he doesn’t know about you.

And, for once, he's excited to learn.

He doesn't want this to end, and when you break the kiss, his lips chase yours, unwilling to part just yet. You're gasping, your breath coming in shallow pants, and he rests his forehead against yours, his eyes closed, his fingers digging into your hips.

"You're right," you say, breathless. "Definitely better than nice."

Crosshair laughs, and he opens his eyes. The sight of you, your eyes dark and your cheeks flushed, lips swollen and red, is almost enough to make him let go of the fragile grasp he has on his control. He wants to kiss you again, and again, and again, but the sound of cheering startles him and reminds him of where he is.

He blinks, and he looks around, and then, he lets out a breath. The fireworks are over.

He hadn't realized.

You're still staring at him, a dazed look in your eyes, and when your lips twitch into a smirk, his grip on your hips tightens.

"Don't look at me like that," he warns, his voice raspy.

"Why not?" you ask. Your hand moves from his shoulder to the nape of his neck, fingers brushing against the hairs there, and it sends a shiver down his spine.

"Because I'm trying to be good," Crosshair explains. "And you're making it very difficult."

"I'm sorry," you say, but there's a hint of laughter in your voice that tells him you're not sorry at all.

"Don't be," he replies, and then, with a groan, he continues, "you're worth it."

Your cheeks flush, and he has to fight the urge to lean in and kiss you again. He knows if he does, he'll never be able to stop, and he'd prefer not to scandalize the locals. Or worse, have his brothers catch him in the act. So, instead, he takes a deep breath, and he moves his hands from your hips to your waist.

"Come on," he says, giving you a gentle nudge, and you pout.

"Fine," you sigh, and you give him a quick peck on the cheek before sliding off his lap. You stand and dust yourself off, and then, you offer him a hand. He takes it and lets you help him to his feet. You're still holding his hand as the two of you start walking, heading back up the stairs.

"So," you begin, breaking the silence, "when should we have that date?"

"Are you free tomorrow?"

"You don't waste any time, do you?" you tease, and he rolls his eyes.

“I’ve wasted enough time," Crosshair says, his tone serious, and you give him a look of understanding

"Yeah, me too."

"So, tomorrow?"

"Tomorrow.”

The two of you share a smile, and he leads you back through through the courtyard. You walk slowly, and you let go of his hand, but the loss of contact is quickly forgotten when you lean into him, your shoulder brushing against his. He's tempted to wrap his arm around you, to pull you close, but the idea of having an audience for that makes his stomach turn, so he doesn't. Instead, he just enjoys the feeling of you at his side, and the easy way you fit into his space. 

It doesn’t take long to make it to the point where you part ways, and the two of you linger, neither one of you ready to leave the other.

"I guess this is goodnight," you say, your voice soft.

"I guess so."

You reach out and grab his hand, and you squeeze it, giving him a shy smile. He squeezes back, and then, without thinking, he raises your hand to his lips and presses a soft kiss to the back of it.

The flash of embarrassment that follows is enough to make his face heat, but it's worth it for the way your eyes light up, and the faint blush that colors your skin. You duck your head, and the small, pleased smile on your face has his heart racing.

"Goodnight, Crosshair," you say.

"Goodnight."

You turn away, and he watches you go, his eyes lingering on the sway of your hips, and the way your hair dances in the wind. You don’t make it very far before you turn around, a mischievous grin on your face.

"By the way," you begin, your voice raised, and the smirk on his face fades. "Tell Omega I said thank you.”

Crosshair's eyes narrow, and his mouth opens and closes, his mind stuttering as he tries to process the words.

Omega set him up, and you knew, and this entire night was her idea. He'd known, in the back of his mind, that she'd been plotting something, and yet, it hadn't occurred to him until now just how much that entailed.

That little brat.

He can't decide if he's proud or embarrassed. He settles for a combination of the two, and the amused look on your face tells him that he's doing a poor job of hiding his feelings.

"Goodnight, Crosshair," you call out, a teasing lilt to your voice.

"Goodnight," he calls back, his tone flat.

You wave goodbye, and then, with a final, knowing look, you turn around and walk away.

He waits until you're out of sight before letting out a groan. Crosshair runs his hand down his face, and he shakes his head, trying not to think about how many times he'd made a fool of himself tonight. His siblings were never going to let him live this down. He sighs, and then, with a roll of his eyes, he starts walking.

When he makes it home, he finds them already gathered in the living room, talking amongst themselves. Omega’s chosen a chair that faces the front door, and her head snaps over toward him as soon as he walks in. Wrecker and Hunter catch on quick, and the room falls silent, the three of them watching him.

"So, how'd it go?" Omega asks innocently.

Crosshair glares at her, his eyes narrowed. She meets his gaze, a challenging look on her face, and he closes the front door with more force than necessary.

"It went fine."

"Fine?" Wrecker repeats. "That's it?"

They’re all staring at him now, and he can feel his temper rising, the heat of embarrassment rushing to his cheeks, and his fingers twitch, aching to shoot something. He forces himself to calm down, to remind himself they’re only asking because they care. Crosshair relaxes his shoulders, his jaw unclenching, and then, he lets out a sigh.

"Yes, fine," he says, his voice low. "We're going out tomorrow."

The room erupts into cheers and laughter, and Wrecker stands, wrapping his arms around him and pulling him into a bone-crushing hug. Crosshair squirms, trying to escape, but it's useless.

"Wrecker, let him go," Hunter orders, and Crosshair breathes a sigh of relief when his brother finally releases him.

"Thanks, Wrecker," Crosshair grumbles, only to let out a grunt when Omega barrels into him, her arms wrapped around his waist.

"I told you it would work," she says, and Crosshair reaches down and ruffles her hair.

"Yes, you did," he concedes, and the look of triumph on her face has him rolling his eyes. He sighs and extracts himself from her embrace, and he clears his throat. “She says thanks.”

Omega beams, and Wrecker and Hunter laugh, clapping him on the back. They congratulate him, teasing him, and he bears it as best he can, trying not to show how happy he is even as his heart races, and a warm feeling spreads through him.

He hadn't thought he'd have this again, a family, people who cared about him, and he hadn't dared to hope that he'd find something else, something more. He hadn't even known what he was missing until he met you.

And, for the first time in a long time, he's excited for the future.

Taglist: @baddest-batchers @covert1ntrovert @stellarbit @bruh-myguy-what @qvnthesia

@spicy-clones @kindalonleystars @cw80831 @totallyunidentified @heidnspeak

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[charmixpower]

how would the winx react to their s/o getting hurt in a fight? :]

My slow descent into becoming an imagines blog??? Is that what's happening?? /J

Oop

Just got this one, which also applies!

I'm just gonna use my base ship names, but this would apply to any partner

Bloom: she blames herself. Was she there? No. Does she have literally anything to do with Sky being injured?? No. It's still her fault tho, she's sure of that. Please don't ask why she's like this. She's not super anxious, she's mostly sad he got injured. Like :(((((. Bloom usually gets sad when something goes wrong, she's pretty mopey about the whole thing. She still tries to help him if course but ever time he needs her help she's all like ";-; your hurt :((((". If Sky is severely injured, like asleep in the hospital injured, she goes to visit her parents for a day before coming back to look over Sky. If hes still awake she stays as close as she can to him at all time

Stella: Lmao she's freaking the fuck out. Stella is mostly fine if she's injured (as long as she doesn't get an ugly scar lmao) but Stella is a worry wort about people she likes. She's not running around but she's full of nervous energy. Constantly bothering Brandon. (Most people would get annoyed, but Brandon thinks it's cute lol) On top of this she's not the best at taking care of people, she tries her best but girl isn't that patient. If Brandon is really injured tho she goes into serious mode™ and gets all somber. She has less bouncing around energy and is better at concentrating on things, but she can't keep it up for long stretchs of time. When she's not doing things she's just buzzing with nervous enegry, doing a bunch of random shit to keep her mind off of Brandon being injured (until he calls for her/needs her). During this time you will see her indulging in every hobby she has and making multiple phone calls to Bloom/Aisha/Musa/Flora— to cry about Brandon being injured for the third time today

Flora: she's chill about the whole thing. Lympha tends to have a lot of injuries due to the giant bugs and plants with teeth, so Flora knows a lot about taking care of people. Plus her mom/older sister enegry. She's amazing at taking care of people so she's confident in her ablity to help. This is both for severely injured or just kinda hurt. Like Flora knows she can help, and knows what to do to help. She does get more anxious depending on the injury but unless its coma bad she's confident she can help and make things easier

Tenca: "who told you to get up. You have a 43.6% chance of harming yourself more." "Here drink this. It boosts your immune system by 33.9%. you'll need it if your wound gets infected." "I've been researching this kind of injury—" Oh. My. God. Helicopter nurse. Tecna wants Timmy to be healed quickly, and the most logical way for him to do that is to lay there and rest and to stop doing things, what do you mean your bored?? This gets worse the worse the injury is. She's actually chiller about this w/ her s1 personality bc she doesn't care as much, but s2 onward and she cares so much she's shopping to make the most nutritious smoothie to promote healing. Please pay no mind to the fact it's disgusting

Musa: Sobbing crying and everything else along thoese lines. Musa is a crier, this will not change no matter how injured Riven is. Tho the more injured he is the more time she spends crying. So like if Riven was in the hospital after s2 finale she's exclusively crying with small breaks bc she got exhausted. Musa is really really really dedicated to taking care of really anyone important to her when their injured/sick (for pretty obvious reasons). So her response tends to be the same no matter the severity, just more. She's also pretty good at taking care of people, she knows what they need and can get their hands on them. She just stuggles with staying calm while helping....she tends to get upset all over again. Rip Musa, her emotions are unfortunately dialed up to 11 at all times (like me) and keeping calm is hard for her. (Think the s3 finale when she was the only one crying after finding her boyfriend "captured" by Valtor). But she is very helpful, and she's more hugy (around the injury), she just wants to be comforting

Aisha: swapping between panicked and deathly serious at break neck speeds. She just goes from catastrophizing to doing everything she can to help in all her power. She hates it when anyone important to her is any type of danger, like at all. She knows she should be able to trust her friends and Nabu to handle things because their all warriors too, but she can't help herself. So when they get hurt, she thinks it's her responsibility to make them perfectly well...even if she realistically can't do anything. Nabu usually tells her the number one thing he needs is cuddles, and stat, just to make her calm down lol. If Nabu is severely injured she's bawling her eyes out and trying to help the best she can at the same time. Multitasking!!! She's pretty anxious so Nabu not being able to help her calm down will get her going off the deep end so fast is isn't even funny. Ends up being knocked out by Piff bc by a certain point she's not being helpful anymore fjjsdkeke. She needs a little intervention, she's fine, she's just 70% anxiety by volume

[rollercoasterwords]

I love the new chapter! Your writing is amazing:)

Do you have any writing tips you use that you’d be willing to pass on?

hi this response is v delayed so the ch is no longer new but thank you!! 💕

i wish i had more/better writing tips but i feel like a lot of my writing process is largely intuitive and isn't coming so much from me like...thinking through "oh x works really well and y doesn't work well" yknow? that being said, there are 2 things i can think of that have sort of been helpful realizations for me over the past year or two (these will probably sound very generic and are most likely things that thousands of other people have already said, but for me personally they were both just driven home recently so bear with me lol)

1 - no writing is bad writing!!

i know this is so cliché but like...i personally am a big perfectionist and sometimes i'll give up on a project if i feel like i can't get it just right, so i think it took me a while to accept the fact that literally everything i've written (including the embarrassing fanfiction from high school and the god-awful self-insert oc stories from middle school) has contributed to getting to the point i'm at now, where i'm pretty confident in my ability as a writer :) writing is a skill just like playing an instrument or learning a language; you have to practice to get better, and any time spent writing is practice and is helping like...build creative muscle or whatever. i have years and years of bad writing squirrelled away on flash drives and old word docs and dusty corners of the internet, and most of it makes me cringe to look back on, but none of the time spent writing shitty stories was time wasted because i had fun doing it and it ultimately helped me improve! so rather than focusing on perfection in writing or worrying about making sure it's good, i think it's honestly more important to just focus on enjoying the process :) which leads me to my second point...

2 - write stories that you want to read!!

again, this might seem obvious and self explanatory, but i feel like especially with social media and influencer culture and the late capitalist hellscape we're all descending into there's this mentality that you need an audience to validate the things you're creating, like art and literature should only exist to be consumed. and i think this mentality is damaging for a lot of reasons, but the one i'll focus on right now is that i think it's incredibly easy to get burnt out when you're creating for other people.

like, ok. i feel like i've had the greatest personal growth with my own writing over the past year and a half, and it started because i was just like "fuck it i want to read the captive prince series from laurent's perspective," and so i wrote it. and part of me was like - oh, this isn't real writing because i'm just rewriting a book series, i'm not coming up with a plot or making up my own characters, etc etc. but the thing is i had tried to write original novels in the past and had always just hit a plateau partway through, so even though part of me was like oh there's no purpose to this, it's not like it's something i'll ever be able to publish--it was just fun! like i was just genuinely having a good time! and it ended up being really good writing practice, because i got to just focus on this in-depth character study + also prove to myself that i could sit down and churn out a book-length work of fiction, even if i was following someone else's plot.

and so then i sort of got out of my own head about like...only ever writing with the ultimate goal of publication in mind, and started focusing more on just writing for fun. and that led to atyd - sirius's pov, which sort of exploded, and then i found myself starting to get bogged down again in focusing on like -- oh, how many people have read this chapter, how many people have commented, what good things are people saying, what bad things are people saying, etc etc. and i started to get in my own head again about the fact that i was rewriting a story, the kind of impostor syndrome mentality of like "well this isn't real writing because it's not 100% original" etc etc etc. and so any time i started worrying about how my writing was being ~consumed by an audience~ i had to like check myself and take a step back and remind myself that at the end of the day, i was writing for me, because it was a story that i wanted to have and to read and while it was amazing and so so special to have so many people invested in the project, it was never really about providing a story for an audience--that was just a happy side effect and not something that i could sustainably centre my writing process around.

and again, even though i was following someone else's plot and building on an already-existing world and characters, sirius's pov helped me grow so much as a writer and also gave me the confidence to feel like i could actually, feasibly write a novel on my own, which is genuinely something that i never knew whether i'd be capable of because i struggled so much in the past. but now i'm essentially writing my own book with this dorlene fic, and i don't think that's something i'd have been capable of a year ago!

anyway, all that is to say -- don't worry about whether your writing is "serious" or publishable or something that will appeal to a broad audience, and try not to measure the worth of your writing based on other people. write a story that you want to read, because the best way to avoid burnout is to make sure that you're having fun writing! like even when i need a break from actually writing my current fic, i'll still find myself thinking about future scenes i want to write + daydreaming + planning it out in my head because it's a story i want to read, and that's what gets me excited to continue writing it! it's really fun to share your writing with an audience and it's so so so amazing to hear that your work resonates with people (seriously, cannot emphasize enough how much i appreciate those of u who send messages like this + leave comments + kudos + all that 💕), but for me the biggest breakthrough i had with my writing was realizing that my most important reader is myself (as cheesy as that is) 🕺 💞

[accidentalharrie]

"He won't claim her because of pr/his image" is a dumb take because he's had a lot of not so positive, gossipy publicity since they were first photographed together??? Like people call him a homewrecker and that he slept his way into a role. Olivia has 100 percent had it worse, obviously, as all women do when it comes to this stuff. But it doesn't make any sense anyway lol.

Not only is the idea of 'claiming' a woman archaic, how do we define it exactly? They've been witnessed walking around holding hands, holidaying together and with their families, plus Harry has never denied being with her? He went bright red when Howard Stern started pressing him about it and pretty much confirmed it then. Why is the world deserving of more because he's a celebrity? Yes, Harry is a lot more closed off than many celebrities but for good reason. It isn't just Olivia that he was incredibly private about, and imo he's probably more protective of this relationship since everybody and their mother has had an opinion on it for nearly 2 years. He's not going to open the door more for them just because people expect it. It's his choice and his boundary for himself and his partner (he literally explained that it's never benefited his relationships to talk about them publicly to Howard Stern). He just doesn't want to because it's his. Period. Like that other anon said, Olivia has shared a little more just by talking about her past relationship and comparing that to now...and she just said she finally knows what it's like to be best friends in a partnership with someone. So I really don't think she's 'pathetically' waiting for him to make some grand statement to the world because she has everything she needs. I agree it might have been hard being distant at the premiere, but it would have been decided together! They would have been torn apart if they had done more than that, especially Olivia. Everyone is just waiting to rip into her any chance they get for being a bad director, mother, and person. Why give people more of an opportunity.

In my opinion it's for protective reasons that they are BOTH like this. People need to listen to what they've both said!! 'We both go out of our way to protect our relationship' or was it 'keep it private'? Either way, they seem to be on the same page. Olivia has said more because she's been accused of more. And she deserved to have her side out there.

That really upsets me that people think so lowly of Harry. I adore him and I've been a fan for ages, so I'm biased but also I have watched and listened to his words for 10 years so...that's really not the impression I get at all. Like come on he just spoke about how he didn't want to be famous if it was gonna hurt the people around him, and people think the thing he wants the most is a clean relationship-less image? And it's not even the case so he and Jeff are doing a shit job of that. I mean, a rookie mistake allowing Olivia to have be part of his rolling stone interview. Damn.

For people to spread that he just doesn't give a fuck is gross, when to me it's the complete opposite. He recently spoke about how lucky he feels to be loved regardless of if he was successful or not, how his priorities have changed and he tries to be a better support to his loved ones. Do we know the details of that? No, even his family and friends are way more private than they used to be when it comes to him.

It doesnt take long to learn a few things about him, and her, and them as a couple. these are all recent interviews. All of that assuming the worst to shame a woman for staying in a relationship she's clearly quite happy in. They must be miserable and lonely people and want strangers to feel the same.

Sorry for the essay 😭

No apologies needed!

[boydgearloose]

DuckTales Theory: The Rightful Heir of Scrooge McDuck

With the finale on the horizon, I've been thinking a lot about where they could potentially take the whole "rightful heir of Scrooge McDuck who is destined to find the Papyrus of Binding" thing. After rewatching the whole series thus far a few weeks ago, it's been on my mind a lot, and with all the news we've gotten about the finale recently, I've managed to piece something together that I think is pretty plausible. I want to warn you guys right away that this post will have spoilers for the finale promo that was released on Monday, so if you haven't seen it and don't plan on checking it out, please don't read any further! That being said, let's get into this.

For starters, let's look at what we know about the rightful heir to the Papyrus of Binding so far. FOWL is taking all of the missing mysteries and it's included, but they can't retrieve this one on their own. In The First Adventure!, Scrooge wrote that it shall go to "the rightful heir of McDuck" and "that those who attempt to harm any of them will be incapable to getting it." Therefore, nobody in FOWL would be able to retrieve the Papyrus because none of them are Scrooge's heirs and they've all tried to harm him and his family in some way. Another thing to note on the topic of this particular episode, despite being the finale of the show, The Last Adventure! is a clear parallel title to The First Adventure!, where the Papyrus was introduced, so it's likely to be found in the finale.

Now, let's look back to The Split Sword of Swanstantine! At the end of this episode, it's shown that Black Heron has gotten a feather from one of the McDucks for some mysterious reason. Many assumed this would be a cloning situation, where they need to get McDuck DNA in order to replicate a "rightful heir" who hasn't hurt Scrooge or his family in order to get the Papyrus back. However, a lot of the fandom seemed to think it was Scrooge's feather. I personally don't think that is the case. In the episode, we see Heron swipe at all of the children.

She very well could have picked up a feather from one of the kids instead. Of course, the triplets are the first to come to mind because they are essentially Scrooge's heirs, so it would make sense if she was after one of their feathers. But then, I started thinking and realized that none of them really take after Scrooge entirely. Huey primarily looks up to Fenton and Donald (if you're looking for someone inside the family) and leans toward being a superhero/scientist rather than adventurer. We know from the last episode that Dewey wants to be a pilot and has always primarily looked up to Della more than anyone else in the family. Louie you could make an argument for, but he only really admires Scrooge because of his money. He doesn't like adventuring and would rather focus on strategy.

So who could the rightful heir be? Well, there's really only one choice and it fits infinitely better than the rest. I'm very certain that Webby is going to be the rightful heir who is destined to find the Papyrus of Binding. There is a ton of evidence hidden throughout the show since season 1 of this, and I've collected all I could find. I'm sure I even missed some.

First of all, let's get into Webby's character. From her first appearance, she's shown to idolize Scrooge and everything about his family. She's invested in McDuck history and dreams of becoming an adventurer just like Scrooge. In fact, the episode of the series that introduces FOWL way back in season 1 is one that focuses heavily on Scrooge's bond with Webby. There's also the part in A Nightmare on Killmotor Hill! where it's revealed that her perfect dream is quite literally turning into Scrooge. She also believed him longer than the other family members in 87 Cent Solution! There's LOTS of stuff in the show about Webby looking up to him, too much for me to even include in one post.

Season 3 is focused on legacy. We've gotten focus or are getting focus on the legacies of each of the triplets: Huey being a superhero (we could get more of this tbh), Dewey being a pilot and whatever's going on with Louie in the next episode. What about Webby's legacy? Well, it's very clear to me that it lies with Clan McDuck. The last Webby-centric episode we got was The Fight for Castle McDuck!, one that heavily focused on why she's a part of the McDuck family and heavily revolved around getting a placement in it (the whole statue thing). This episode really felt like it was leading up to her ultimate legacy being to follow in Scrooge's footsteps and become a great adventurer. It was also very recent and not counting the Christmas episode which was likely out of production order, the last Webby episode before the finale. (Also, I think it's important to note that the first season 3 episode that heavily focuses on FOWL has a Scrooge and Webby B plot. Just food for thought.)

Another important thing that I just noticed is that in the season 2 finale Moonvasion!, at the end of the FOWL reveal, the camera SPECIFICALLY pans in on Webby hugging Scrooge. This is a deliberate decision, as Webby could have easily been shown with the triplets of Beakley in this scene. But they chose to put Scrooge and Webby front and center.

Another thing to point out is that FOWL's intentions with the feather is obviously cloning, as mentioned before and theorized by many. In the finale for the promo, we saw two new characters with an interesting resemblance to Webby. It's very likely that May and June are the results of them trying to clone Webby through her feather.

However, they don't look exactly like her. Their color schemes and hairstyles are different, and we know by the casting announcement that they have different voice actresses. Therefore, I don't think FOWL has mastered the art of cloning just yet. They need a perfect clone of Webby, and much like Bentley and Buford (who appear to be clones of Bradford, I'm gonna be real), they're like Webby but not exactly Webby. I wouldn't be surprised if they were sent to the lost library for being "rejects," where they're later found by the family, explain why they were created and open up the exposition for The Last Adventure.

How does FOWL know Webby is the rightful heir? I don't know. I don't think we'll be able to determine that until we know more. But I feel like they somehow do and plan on making the perfect clone of her to retrieve the Papyrus before the McDucks are able to. This is a bit of a stretch, but maybe Beakley knows about this too and is keeping it from Webby because it opens her up to danger. Who knows?

And one more thing before we wrap this post up: remember when Frank said something from Last Crash of the Sunchaser! would come up in season 3? That had to be about him stating Webby wasn't family. It could very well be brought up again in the context that Webby isn't only family but the rightful heir of Scrooge McDuck himself!

Anyway, that's about all I have. I'm sure there's more evidence, and if you have any, feel free to respond with it or send it to me via DMs or asks! This will definitely be on my mind until the finale airs LOL

[tea-twords]

Group #4 for Windtrace headcanons!

In this group: Fischl, Ganyu, Gorou, and Hu tao

Fischl

Ah yes

The only 4 star I don't have

And I know almost nothing about her

Most of these are gonna be based on what little I know, what I've read, and what kind of vibe I get so bear with me

I don't think Fischl would be allowed to bring Oz, and even if she is I feel like she might do it without him to make things fair for the people she's playing with

She's in the intelligence department thing in the adventurers guild, so she's clearly really smart

Meaning

She's really good at windtrace

Because you've gotta have smarts to be good

She's probably equally good at being both Hunter and Rebel, of anything slightly better as a Rebel

As a Hunter, she puts in perspective who her targets are and where they may hide in order to find them

For example, if she's looking for Barbara, she might want to look where there's a lot of the same thing in one spot

Or if she was looking for Razor, around some bushes or behind a rock

I think she's definitely the kind of person to use teasing against the Rebels

But like in her really sophisticated way of talking, which somehow makes it so much worse

Rip Bennett

As a rebel, she chooses her hiding spot carefully and makes good use of her power-ups

A fan of the bait skill, she loves setting it down and watching from afar as it bursts in front of the Hunter

same ngl

The people she likes playing with most are Razor and Bennett (ofc), Mona, Amber, Barbara, and The Travelers!

She plays with Razor and Bennett the most though

It's really fun playing with her

Oh god I'm so sorry I know nothing about her so these are super short ahh

I'm sorry again

Ganyu

Gaaaanyu

Her first game was with Lumine, Venti, and Xiao, Xiao as the Hunter

She was a little confused with the rules, but managed to hide from Xiao for around a minute

She's lowkey impressed with Lumine and aspires to be as good as her at this

She's pretty decent a both positions, but might be a better Hunter lol

As a Hunter, she definitely tried everything she can to do her job as the Hunter

Sometimes takes it really seriously lmfao

Straight sprinting after you the split second she sees you, she wants to win

And get better

I feel like she would only really use teasing if it were someone she was absolutely sure would get flustered

Examples include: Aether, Chongyun, Xiao, Possibly Yanfei, Possibly Keqing

She still doesn't know whether it would work on Shenhe, she dosen't know her well enough yet (but it would affect her to some degree hehe)

She wouldn't dare use teasing against people who could or might (and some of them have) use it against her as well lmao

Examples include: Zhongli, Ningguang, Beidou, Xingqiu (she don't know that it would work), Xinyan (same as Xingqiu), and Xiangling (same and Xingqiu and Xinyan)

As a rebel, she's pretty decent as well!

Tries to be as clever as possible with where she hides and which disguises she uses

If she's really confident in her spot, she'll stay there the whole round

But she has a hard time making sure she dosen't make any sounds

Whether it be slightly heavy breathing, soft giggling due to being teased, or straight squealing and sprinting away once the Hunter knows where

Xiao has done that to her too many times

Like, once he realizes where she is, he's fucking bolting

And Ganyu literally screams

I mean who can blame her HAVE YOU SEEN THIS GUYS ELEMENTAL SKILL

Xiao finds it hilarious but he won't admit that

Even though he makes it obvious

Ganyu gets so fucking pissed (not really) lmfao

Sorry sorry I'll continue

Her favorite people to play with are Xiao, Keqing, Zhongli, Yanfei, Ningguang, Xiangling, Chongyun, Shenhe, and the Travelers

She also dosen't mind Venti, even though that bitch can be crueler than Xiao

She's played the most games with Keqing, Xiao, and Lumine though

Keqing because they're besties, Xiao because they became besties, and Lumine because she's trying to fucking learn (also because they too became besties)

Wrecks Keqing and Xiao a lot lmfao

And gets wrecked by them too

Hehe

Ok that's it for Ganyu

I love Ganyu

Gorou

EHEHE

I love him hehehe

First game was with Lumine, Kazuha, Thoma, and himself, with Lumine as the Hunter

Gorou didn't know shit what to do at first lmao

Neither did Kazuha

Thoma knew what to do, he was just bad

So yeah Lumine caught them all pretty quickly

Their second round had Thoma as the Hunter, who was still beyond excited to be playing windtrace again

So yeah Gorou was the only one caught that round

Kazuha probably would have been caught too if not for his naturally better speed due to his anemo vision

At that point Gorou just asked Lumine "HOW."

So Lumine being the great person she is ofc gave him her advice on being a good Rebel

Lumine isn't the best (Sayu is), but she's still good so Gorou trusted her

After playing more rounds and getting good, Gorou learned he was a better Hunter than Rebel, although he can be both parts decently well

As a Hunter, I don't know if it's the dog in him or the general, but he's got this really good instinct on where people could be

Like he could just tell

Yun Jin can do that too, but we'll talk about her when we get there

Honestly probably giggles as he's running to catch or find someone

Because he's just having a good time you know

So yeah he's good!

Cant catch Sayu

But no one can catch Sayu

So he's still good

Would he tease? Maybe, if he thinks the other person would react

So he'd probably tease Kazuha and Aether most lol

As a rebel, he picks his hiding spots carefully and goes for what would conceal him best

Because of the war and everything, he's probably pretty agile so he can get to high places for an advantage

So he's also pretty good at this!

One thing though, that I saw on @danibby 's blog before,

Imagine Gorou in a disguise, and his tail is wrapped around his midriff to not take up too much space, but then it twitches

Which tickles

And Gorou is most definitely ticklish

So then he jerks away from whichever side it came from, only for it to twitch again and slowly happen more often

He just fucking self destructs

The Hunter, whoever they might be, finds this fucking hilarious

Gorou gets embarrassed tho

But a good kind of embarrassed if that makes sense

Teasing works so well on him omg

He'll do everything in his power not to make a noise but I assure you, his face will be bright red

Especially if it's Yae miko, she's brutal

His favorite people to play with are Travelers, Kazuha, Thoma, Itto, Sara, Beidou, and Yoimiya

And he really likes playing with Amber when he meets her

Even though she usually wins, he feels like he could definitely learn something from her

Also Sara being up there might be confusing, but pls I love how I'm their voice lines about each other, even though on opposing sides, they have a lot of respect for each other and even want to fight alongside each other one day

Each other

I'm so sorry

But yes I like to imagine him formally challenging her to a game and she formally accepts

And then they're absolute goofs once they start playing

He's played a few rounds with Diona before too

When they met, Diona was like 👉 and Gorou was like 👈

Because animal ears

It was literally the Spider-Man meme

She's better than him at windtrace though lmfao

He's also played with Sucrose and Albedo before

One test and study experiment led to another, and now here they are playing hide and seek

Amazing how friends can be made

Aight I think that's all I got for the puppe

Hu tao

Fucking run

She's gonna get you

She's super good at being Hunter, but also real good at being a Rebel

So she's good in general

As a Hunter, watch the fuck out

She's like Itto, she's gonna find you (except Sayu)

Her tactics involve scanning the area for any signs of movement or noise, and all while being playful about it

She will tease you to no ends

And when she finds you, your gonna get destroyed

Literally no matter who you are, she will wreck you

A young chef in a famous restaurant? Wrecked. A trained exorcist with an abundance of Yang energy? Wrecked. An actress who puts on opera performances and is wildly known around Liyue? Wrecked. The Yuheng of the Liyue Qixing? Wrecked. The fucking Tianqian? Wrecked. A fatui harbinger? Wrecked. A strong disciple of the adepti kicking ass since she was 6? Wrecked. One of the adepti, brilliant in the field of law? Wrecked. An Adepti who is also part of the Qixing? Wrecked. The last remaining of the Yakshas? Double wrecked. Your employee, who is also a literal fucking god? Wrecked.

I listen off a lot of people

But it's true

She dosen't give a shit who

She'll tease you so much too

If your easily flustered, you don't stand a chance

She likes using the favor for that one thing that traps one player in a box for 40 seconds or so, to give them that cruel anticipation

And like, once she's got the other two rebels, she'll walk real slowly towards the one in the box (if they're still there) while they just fucking crumble

Chongyun's worst fear

Shit I talked a lot

Ok as a Rebel

She has so much fun too!

She likes to fuck with the Hunter lmao

Like Fischl, a big fan of the bait power-up

She loves leaving it in a wide open spot, and makes sure the Hunter is suspicious of it

And then boom

Hu tao just giggles at the Hunter as she's watching from afar lmfao

When she's about to be discovered, she likes to pop out and scare the Hunter

Like how Itto does

She's actually a lot like Itto omg-

If she gets caught, she'll be super pretend-dramatic about it

"Noooooo! I've tried too hard to hide, how could you do this to meeeee!"

If the person is Beidou or Zhongli, she's getting tickled for it lmfao

I genuinely don't think I can make a favorite people to play with list, she love playing with pretty much everyone

If I had to chose the TOP TOP people, it would be Zhongli, Xiao, and Yanfei

Pls she would wreck them all to no end you can't tell me she wouldn't

But yes in conclusion Hu tao is really playful and super fun to play with hehe

LETS GOOOOO I DID IT FINALLY THAT TOOK FOREVER

I think it only took a long time because of me still not knowing shit about Fischl but I hope these are still good!

[rosemary-is-in-pesterquest]

literally I was watching someone's playthrough of pesterquest as it was being released, and I almost finished it, but then I got spoiled for the fact that Ult Dirk shows up, and it totally knocked me off the wagon. like I've had it in my head that eventually I'll go watch Dirk's content, but it's been so long since I watched everything else... by this point it'd be kinda disjointed to even do that.

also, I was weirdly irritated by MSPAR in pesterquest? I found them so charming in hiveswap, because they were characterized as kind of a bumbling, overeager and well intentioned traveler that just wanted to help. but in pesterquest they get all know-it-all ish... it's reeeeeeally off putting. like I could forgive them being confused or disheartened, but they went a step too far and got all cynical and been-there-done-that, and gave a lot of advice that just wasn't good? as if they were some sort of expert or something. it makes pesterquest kind of irritating because you play as an irritating audience surrogate character who does shit that you don't actually want to do.

like, okay, Eridan's route, right? at the end, the advice MSPAR gave was basically "stop being an asshole" which is like... warranted and fair? but first of all, this Eridan needs different advice than homestuck's Eridan! and second, would a real asshole actually take advice like that? it's so... basic.

Eridan is a character that I'm not super attached to, but I get peeved when people get him wrong. in homestuck, the thing that Eridan needs, is to realize that if he wants something from another person, he has to try not to be a leech about it. everything is all about his perspective all the time. when he wants something, he'll ask, but if he doesn't get it, he'll whine and beg, and if people get mad at him for doing that, he gets all self deprecating and bemoans how hopeless his situation is, and how much everyone hates him. like he'll literally annoy one person into getting fed up with him, just so he can go cry to another person about his problems, and ask them for advice that he probably won't even take, because getting attention was the point, and this is technically what he wanted anyway. and the more people catch on and get frustrated, the more fuel he has for his "everybody hates me" pity party.

and the interesting thing about Eridan is that all of this probably comes from a real worry that nobody could like him, even if he tried. I mean, most of his friends are lower on the hemospectrum, and have a systemic reason to hold some sort of resentment towards him. so like, he probably likes Feferi because the two make an appropriate match class-wise... but he also probably likes her because she's his only friend that is more privileged than he is, so she can't hold his status against him.

also, pesterquest leans into that old fanon thing where Eridan is indiscriminately desperate and will date anyone. like... no! originally, Eridan specifically wanted to fill all of his quadrants! he wanted a matesprit (Feferi), a kismesis (Vriska), an auspistice (Kanaya), and a moirail (possibly Karkat). and not only that, but he wanted these specific people to fill these specific roles for him unconditionally and without conflict, in spite of their actual feelings. Feferi doesn't want to date him... she doesn't even really want to be his moirail because she's doing all the emotional labor and it's exhausting. and Kanaya had a red crush on Vriska at the time... the last thing she wants is to be auspistice-zoned! meanwhile, Vriska is becoming less and less interested in Eridan anyway because she's got her own unhealthy fascinations with certain people. so like, Kanaya wouldn't even be acting as a proper auspistice anyway... she wouldn't be helping to calm a volatile rivalry, she'd be trying to force a lackluster relationship to continue. that's like, the opposite of how it's supposed to be!

literally the only one of these that might've worked is Karkat as his moirail, because Karkat is amazing at giving advice, and dealing with difficult people's bullshit without getting sucked into too much drama. but like... that's probably the one relationship out of all of these that started from genuine charisma between two people, rather than Eridan deciding who he wanted to pursue based on a checklist of socially advantageous qualities. at least with that, it's implied that Karkat also likes talking to Eridan... like, both of them are getting something out of this. in all other cases, Eridan isn't even in it for the romance. he's in it to gain validation by living up to a societal standard.

it's only after our 12 trolls end up on the meteor after their SGRUB session that Eridan starts getting all weird about dating people other than the specific four he was already interested in. and that's specifically because there are now only 12 trolls left that exist. these people are the only ones left, so if he can't get a relationship to work with any of them, that's that. so basically, when pesterquest characterizes him this way, even though he still lives on a fully populated Alternia... why is he acting like that?

Eridan needs to learn how to actually put something into a relationship that he wants to get something out of. and to do that, he needs to believe that he has value beyond his status, and that it's possible for people to be motivated by more than class politics and spite. he treats people exploitatively because he expects them to try and exploit him just as badly... it's not just about fixing bad behavior. it's about him learning to put in work, and give another person reasons to like him, without feeling like a sucker for conceding any ground. the more defensive he gets, the worse he is.

and pesterquest messed up Jake's route too! what is it about hope players that stumps people like this?? I get that Jake is tricky, but jeez... I won't get into it as much, but Jake is always masking what he really feels, and the way his route handles him makes him seem like he's acting equally neutrally friendly to each of the other alpha kids. but then it implies that his true feelings are that he considers all three of his friends' romantic interest in him to be equally serious, and equally unwanted. that is... blatantly untrue. he knows Roxy might find him attractive but won't make a genuine move on account of Jane. she literally drunkenly told him so. and Roxy also drunkenly told Jake that Jane likes him. meanwhile, he also pretty much knows that Dirk had a crush on him when they were kids, but back then he kind of shut it down, or at least sent mixed signals, because he wasn't confident about having a crush on a boy. now Dirk himself is not confident that Jake actually likes him, and is trying to back off because he feels like his younger self was overly aggressive, but the AR is still as brazen as Dirk used to be when pursuing Jake, so it kind of undermines that attempt. still, Jake feels like he might've already come off poorly to Dirk. he does like him though... and he knows that Jane has a crush on him, and doesn't want to be the one who disappoints her, so he weasels his way out of addressing it. that is the deal with the alpha kids. not Jake just kind of bemoaning the fact that all of his friends are in love with him and he's not down for anything. so once again, we see a pesterquest route written on the basis of mistaken assumptions.

sorry for going on and on and on... I just find all of this so frustrating. half the characters are only the fan interpretations of themselves, and MSPAR sucks, and the meta is confusing, and... I wish it was good but it's not.

I love you for this ask anon, I never played friendsim but I did see a lot of people who tuned into all the friendsims express annoyance over the way Reader was portrayed in pesterquest. I can't even remember what happened in the Jake route bc I'm tired but it definitely could've been better.

Imo, best alpha kid routes go from: Roxy, Jane, Jake, and Dirk (half his route wasn't even dedicated to him lol rip)