#it just feels really like both interesting but also very off how the unit that was based on happy slice of life and meant to give the playe

[demodraws0606]

You know what absolutely puzzles me about WxS's writing, specifically now, is that right now we're in the downtime fun times before the main conflict starts being introduced.

HoWever, why is every fucking event with the exception of like Emu5 so obsessed with cutting down the lighthearted mood with like suprisingly dark topics ?

Like I swear no other unit does this, usually when dark topics are introduced it's usually to fit the mood of the event and is meant to be tackled.

But like lemme list the 3 WxS event out of 4 in this arc that does this shit :

-Tsukasa4 -> Play literally is about a dude who wants to commit suicide by jumping into a river/the sea

-Rui4 -> This event is wack in general but the script of the entire script of that movie is like surprisingly messed up (depressed dude with implied suicidal ideation, and his sister who has a terminal illness who attempts to leave him so that he doesn't feel bad when she Dies)

-Tsukasa5 -> Buff dude (ik he has a name I just don't care) reveals that, in the past, he injured himself so badly that he is now completely unable to achieve his life long dream and also says about how had a deppressive period after the fact where he felt like he had no goal in life (depending on the translation there is possible implications of suicidal ideation but it's the same as Rui4 as it could just be a depression thing)

It's like so Weird, I haven't seen any other unit do this even in darker events. Like you guys know that this means that canonically the only unit that has had a descriptive mention of suicide (where the method is stated) is WxS right ?

Brother I thought this was silly fun time unit (if you ignore the periods of pain and misery) why the fuck is there like mentions of dark topics that not even other units tackle at times.

There are times where I do think certain units kinda do the same thing, VBS for exemple is a unit with Souma's backstory being similar to these sudden "oh..." moments. But the fact I even have to mention VBS, aka the unit with the most focus on side characters shows how strange this is.

I'm sure there are other examples but it just, still feels so incredibly strange.

It feels cheap to 0 in on the dark side of WxS but I probably wouldnt be doing that if it didn't so blatantly stand out in the writing.

It's not in a bad way but it is very much giving a strange vibe

[hoodedjelly]

my Jenny, Tuck, Brad, Shelden, and Vega older designs ^__^

i'm watching mlaatr, still not done, i think i got like 10 more eps (and if i'm being transparent i skipped around eps... i just wanted to see vega...). And i'm absolutely loving the show!!!! i love these characters a lot, didn't like Shelden at first i'm going to be honest, #1 Shelden hater for a bit there. but he chilled out in season two and i started to ship breldon with that too so now i just love him so much.

more about my personal headcanons:

Jenny: - I am under the belief that she is transgender. Jenny was made genderless, so her deciding to be a girl was strictly her choice and i believe that makes her trans. (She's also a lesbian) - she did grow a bit, im not gonna explain how idc really i just liked her being a taller lady :-) - she has A LOT of different cute outfits and hair styles, honestly too much to draw. she never transforms back into her base show outfit when crime fighting, she just fights in her cute summer dress she don't care. - her and vega are dating grrgrgrrrr - when vega is in rule she makes it so there is complete free access between earth and cluster prime for citizens in both places. - I say that cause i think when jenny is older she moves in with vega, technically living in cluster prime but visits earth like everyday. And brad/shelby/tucker/wakeman visit cluster prime - Jenny also hangs out with the nicktoons unite gang, but i deffo feel like its just that secondary friend group that you don't talk to with for months. when you talk again its the same goofiness as before - i think danny calls for her help when he needs it (also manny) Tuck: - he is still a little shit but we love him - adhd boy - questioning cis (he/him) - he got into robotics/stem and builds little silly things - with that, he gets help from Shelby - pretty much just a silly teen, he's on the internet a lot and has "cringe" interests - but idk he's having fun and being silly and finding himself (those interests is stuff like sonic and among us) Shelden(Shelby) - honestly kinda nervous about ppl thoughts on my Shelden, idk it makes so much sense in my brain - hits you with the transfem beam (she/they) Pansexual (she just wants anyone type of vibe) - I think when jenny is visiting vega often that leaves Shelby and Brad hanging out alone a lot. which they don't mind honestly, they are actually good friends! - but during that they just get closer and start catching feelings. Shelby eventually lets go of her feelings about jenny and realizes they were a real jerk and weirdo to her. brad helps them through that and eventually her realizing she's trans. blah blah they in love and kiss at some point. - Shelby is also a furry lmaooo her fursona is a cat.

Brad: - bisexual cis man (he/him) - Still his old brad self if i'm being honest. - totally forgot to say i think all 3 of them go off to college together (even though jenny doesn't have to i feel like she would prob want to just for the experience, but tell me if you think differently i'm still unsure) - i really don't know what else to say sorry brad! he's literally just as silly as ever man. he's just also gay - i will say here i feel it takes a lot longer for shelby and brad to start dating then jenny and vega. they got that slow burn kinda shit going on, since a lot of that is shelby being confused about her feelings. and jenny and vega just hit it off right away if im being honest, very high school sweethearts. - (also i think shelby makes brad make a fursona to match hers, so brad got a dog fursona)

Vega: - Lesbian cis (she/her) - That ending of her just ruling cluster prime was just so crazy to me cause like, aint she like 16? - i think she has a lot of stressed nights and fearing she's not doing the right thing for her people, and jenny tries to help as much she can - that is why jenny visits so much, she wants to help her. - very much got those nights were she accidently falls asleep at her desk, jenny finding her and giving her a blanket and a kiss goodnight - it's not like she's unhappy, she is actually very very passionate about her work and wants to NOT be like her mom - and yeah she deffo goes to robo therapy for the stuff with her mom. - i think it's a conflict where vega is scared her mom is gonna come back and jenny has to reassure her that if she does they'll get rid of her for good.

imma be honest a lot of my hcs are pretty half-baked and random things, im sure im going to think of more stuff in the future but that will be in different posts.

[hellodropbear]

like she used to

alexia putellas x sister

i have been writing this for ages and it has just sat in my documents folder since january. i don't usually post stuff i write so this will probably get taken down at some point. i've written 13k words so far but this is just the first 4k.

~~~~~~

I hadn't expected to get the call up, not at all really. But Mapi tore her meniscus and apparently the first team found themselves in need of a backup centre back and I was the best option from the B team. It's a compliment, really. Mami is very proud of me and she is excited for me and my sister to play together in a few weeks, even though she is still recovering from her surgery and I will probably not make it off the bench. I am only 15 and 10 months, usually they wait until you are at least 16 and a bit before you can play. 

But, I don't really know how to feel. Thankfully Alexia won't be in training with me for now and I try to avoid thinking about what will happen when she eventually gets better and I have to face her again.

Alexia is my older sister by a lot. There's a 14 year age gap between us and I used to completely and utterly idolise her. She and Alba were two superheroes, always by my side when I needed them. I put them on a pedestal like they were the greatest human beings to ever walk the planet. To me back then, they were. 

I was only four when my father died. All I remember from that time was the big black invisible sheet that hung outside his study and the dark and scary emotions that swallowed our house whole. Alba and Alexia would argue about who got to cuddle me at night and I was so unaware what was happening that I would happily agree, wiping away their tears when it all got too much. 

The death of our father made our family unit stronger. Mami, Ale, Alba and Elena - it was all any of us needed and we supported each other in whatever ways we could. 

Mami had to pick up more shifts at her job, so she couldn't pick me up from school. Alexia had just got her license so she would come in a break during training and pick me up in her training gear. 

Alexia didn't have time to drop me off at home so I would sit and watch the training with whoever wanted to give me company when they were injured. 

Most days, Alba would come and pick me up and take me on the bus all the way home. She would play cartoons on the TV as she sat at the table and did school work. Some days, when she had the time she would sit with me and watch Alexia's training and we'd all go home together. Alba used to say she enjoyed the training. Looking back, I think she just wanted a free ride home and an excuse to not do her homework. 

As I grew up, everything just worked. Alexia and Alba were still living at home as a support to Mami and everything was perfect. My sisters were my idols, my Mami was my shining star. She still is. She would do anything for her daughters, as long as it meant we were all happy. 

That is why it has been so hard for her over the past two years. 

I have not been happy, not really. My football has been thriving, I have represented my country in the under 17 age group and I am a consistent starter in the Barcelona B team. I spent two years in La Masia before they sent me to the B team last year and I have only been improving since. Everything is going well. Mami says I have had a better start to my career than Alexia did. 

Maybe that is why Alexia hates me. Maybe Mami is just saying that to make me feel better about it.

Alexia and I, despite the 14 year age gap, were always inseparable - for the first 12 years of my life. She was at every single school event, football game, she picked me up from trainings when she could and would train me herself in the garden. We shared a common passion that Alba was not interested in at all - we both love football, we eat, sleep and breath it. Football is everything. She was the one who gave me that mentality. 

"Football is life, Lena, you are lucky you are so good because now you also get to live football and hermanita, it is the most incredible thing." 

She had whispered that to me when I was 11. We were sat on the beach, a place we visited frequently throughout my childhood, both of us staring out at the reflection of the moon on the sea. Alba was fast asleep, her head in Alexia's lap as she snored lightly, completely oblivious to our conversation. 

It all fell apart over three years ago, although I don't have the first clue as to why. 

It was not an explicit event that ruined everything, more my older sister growing up and flying the nest that was so secure and established over years and years of shared success, happiness, failure and grief. She moved out of home long before that, but her split with Jenni upset her, I think, a great deal. I wouldn't know because she didn't really tell me anything - that was strictly Alba's business. 

I didn't even know they had broken up until 5 months after it actually happened. 

"Mami, why does Jenni never come over any more?" 

It was an innocent and normal question, but the look on my mother's face told me everything. Everything about Jenni and everything about my sister. 

I think that was the first knock. She hadn't done anything wrong but I had loved Jenni and Jenni had loved me. I would have thought that she would have told me they broke up. Maybe she didn't want to, maybe she just forgot. She does a lot of that these days. 

Before she and Jenni broke up, she still came to all of my games. She never missed one game before I transferred to La Masia and would insist on taking me out to ice cream after every one. She would tease me for not scoring like she does, even though I play as a centre back. 

"You need some training from Mapi, she is a centre back and has the most lethal free kick, hermanita! She is the best defender I have played with, but don't tell her I said that. I think you will grow up to be better than her." 

She was excited that day, I had made a few good saves and I think that was the first time she really saw that I had the potential to be great. 

I remember the first game she was late to. I noticed immediately but we both pretended she was on time - she only made it to the last 10 minutes but I put it down as traffic or being caught up at training. She was busy, it takes a lot to be La Reina. 

I remember the first game she missed entirely. She wasn't there at the beginning and she wasn't there at the end. I was 13 and I didn't have a phone yet so I couldn't call Mami and ask her to come pick me up because Alexia was too busy. I told myself it was because she was too busy. I didn't want to say she had forgotten because that was too hard for me to handle. 

I remember vividly sitting outside the stadium as the sun set. My coach had asked where my sister was, I was a bit stuck with what to say but I managed to convince her I was fine and she could go home. 

Alba came and picked me up after work that night. It was dark and she looked sad but when I asked if she was ok, she just shrugged her shoulders and said everything would be fine. 

I found out from Mami a few weeks later that Alba was sad because I had never once been forgotten anywhere. Alba saw that as the destruction of our strong family. I suppose she was not wrong. 

Alexia never said anything about that game but she was at the next. She didn't take me out for ice cream after, instead patting my head and telling me she would drop me off at Mami's work. 

"I have things to do, Elena, I am very busy. Hopefully soon Mami will let you catch the bus on your own. Maybe Alba can take you soon so you know the correct routes." 

Her words hurt more than I could admit to myself, I told myself to stop being pathetic. Mami asked why I was crying when I walked into her office. I told her I had played terribly and she comforted me. I think she knew I was lying. I think that is why she had tears in her eyes when she released me from her grip-like hold.

Since that day, Alexia has been to 3 of my games. She went to one more of my old club games but she was sat beside Alba, her eyes glued to her phone the entire match. I was so unfocused that the ball deflected off my face and we conceded. I was taken off with a bleeding nose but when I looked up in the stands, my sister was still staring at her phone. Alba had run down the stairs and was by my side when I entered the little sick bay. 

I cried then too. Most people thought it was because of the bleeding nose or the conceded goal. Alba knew that wasn't the real reason. 

The penultimate game she watched was the final of the under 15s Catalonia cup. I don't know what she did during the game because Mami told me not to look up. She said she didn't want me to get distracted but I think she meant to say she didn't want me to get hurt. 

I think I still idolised Alexia at that point in time. She was still my older sister and she was still the best player in the world. She still had weekly dinners at home, although she wouldn't sit next to me and sneakily take all the food I didn't want off my plate anymore. She stopped staying to watch a movie after dinner even though my favourite part of the week was falling asleep in her lap as her hands combed softly through my hair. 

I remember when I was accepted into La Masia, Mami held a nice big dinner. It was right in the middle of covid so it was technically illegal, but we had a lot of my family over. Mami invited a few of the Barcelona girls as well and Mapi and Leila reminded me of what it used to be like before Alexia stopped loving me. 

The reminder of the before was more painful than I liked to admit, and the night ended when the tears that had been burning in the back of my eyes finally spilled out as I was talking to Mapi. 

She immediately pulled me into her arms and asked what was wrong and I struggled to find a lie that would be believable. 

I settled on saying I was upset about everything changing - which I suppose was true. 

I remember Alexia looking mortified and breaking eye contact as soon as I looked at her. She told me off that evening when Mami was in the shower and Alba was talking to someone else. She told me I needed to be grateful for everything I have been given and that she paved the way for me. 

It was even worse when she said I would never achieve the things she has. She said it was because I didn't have the mentality that she did, that I had it all so easy. 

It hurt the most when she told me she was disappointed in the person I was. 

"I hope we never share a shirt, Elena, because the day you play in the first Barcelona team is the day that we have run out of players. It will mean that football players are week and female footballers can not be weak. You do not have it in you to be like me, to do what I have done to get to where I am."

The venom in her voice sent a cold shiver down my spine and I felt like I had been stabbed. I didn't cry that time. I waited until I was in my bedroom to sob my heart out. 

The last time she ever watched me play was the next day, but she didn't have an option not to. I played terribly, my first game as a La Masia student, my sisters words repeating over and over in my head. 

That was really what tipped the relationship I once shared with Alexia on its head. The pedestal I had put her on was destroyed and suddenly she was just another player. I barely saw her as my sister any more. She couldn't love me, you wouldn't be able to hurt someone you love so much. 

I have barely seen her since. She still comes to our family dinners on Thursday nights - she still very much loves Alba and our Mami. But I tell Mami that I have training with Barcelona B late on Thursdays. It finishes at 6 and dinner starts at 7, but I just organise to go to my friends' houses for dinner instead. 

Sometimes we both have dinner together at home, but it is awkward and I hate it. I think she has probably forgotten about what she said to me in June of 2021, but I don't think I will ever be able to. 

She doesn't like me, but it's ok because I have learnt to accept that. But I will never not love my sister because she was once everything to me. 

~~~~~~

"Pequena Putellas!" Patri's excited shriek is what welcomes me into the dressing room on my first day. She tackles me into a hug and squeezes me tight. "It has been such a long time, mi favorita!" 

The last time I saw Patri was only last year at the champions league final. I had sat with my whole family but I went to the bathroom when everyone else went and spoke to the players. I don't think Patri would have seen me. 

I can only smile as she continues. 

"I remember you as the little 8 year old who would sit and watch our training sessions after school! I was so confused by you when I first arrived here, you know. I remember the first time Ale let you play a game with us and you were so good!" 

"Nobody doubted that you would be on this team one day!" A new voice entered the conversation.

"Marta!" I hugged the brunette closely. She was always one of my favourites. 

"I am proud of you, pequena putellas." 

Her words are familiar as I have heard them out of my mothers voice time and time again my whole life. But they seem foreign coming from Marta and it is an unwanted reminder of my sister. I don't know why - maybe it is because I have always associated this Barcelona team with her. I don't remember the last time she said she was proud of me. 

I don't remember the last time she said anything to me, really. 

"Gracias, Marta, I have missed you." I bury my head into her neck and she holds me closer. 

"You have not been around as much since you transferred to La Masia. I wanted to come and watch but Ale never extended an invitation and I didn't want to overstep." I shake my heads at her words and she frowns. 

"Alexia doesn't have time for my games, she hasn't for a while. It takes a lot to be La Reina." 

Marta's frown deepens at my words and the attention of a few spanish players is captured. I should have spoken quieter, I forgot how many people in here speak catalan. 

"It is ok, she is very supportive, but she just can't come to my games. She makes it up in other ways." I am lying through my teeth but Marta will never know. 

"I am sure, she must be very proud of you, being selected in this team for the first time, it is a big deal, you are very young."

All I can do is nod, my energy is all being put into holding back my own tears. I don't know if Mami told her. I don't know if Alexia even knows that I was selected. 

"Get changed now, I am sure Jona will want to talk to you before the session, especially with the game tomorrow."

I nod again as Marta pats me on the back and walk over to the cubby that says my name. It feels a bit surreal, really. 

I never really thought I would see my name on a Barcelona cubby, accompanied by my new number that I chose in the meeting a few days ago. It was always a dream, but I never thought it was achievable. Alexia always seemed like a superstar, a superhuman of sorts and I would never reach that kind of level. 

But here I am in the team that I always wanted to be in - in no way am I anywhere near my sisters level but I am on my way to being like her. I just wish she cared. I wish she was proud of me like Marta is. 

Her cubby sits across from me and I try to tear my eyes from it but it sits and stares right back at me. I feel like an intruder in Alexia's space, this is not for me, she would not want me to be here. 

I tie my laces quickly after that and head out onto the pitches to begin training. 

I have trained with the first team twice before, but the Barcelona Bs were always slightly seperate and we could keep our distance from the first players. Jonatan is a familiar face and I feel comfortable as he smiles and me and motions for me to follow the others to the gym. 

It is weird, being promoted within my own club. I am not so much a new signing, but a replacement - I am not good enough to be in the first team but they had no other options when Mapi injured herself. 

I used to worry that people would say I only get opportunities because my last name is Putellas. When my sister told me I was weak all those years ago, that idea sort of cemented in my head, I suppose. 

I never told my Mami what her daughter said to me because it would upset her. I told Alba half of it when she found me crying in my room a few days later but made her promise to not tell anyone. She couldn't say anything to Mami, Alexia, anyone at all because it would only make Alexia think I was weaker. 

She was furious and tried to tell me it was untrue but it had already been said. I believed Alexia's word more than anyone else. To me, she was a superhuman. 

But when I spoke to Jonatan a few days ago he made me feel like I was wanted within this squad. He made it clear that he wants me to integrate completely into the squad in the next few years and that he can see me playing soon even though I am only 15. 

I told him I didn't want anything special because of my surname. 

He told me that he chose me because of my first name. 

"Elena Putellas,"  he said with a grin, "you may be as good as her, but you are not your sister. This is a professional environment. As long as you perform, which I know you will, nobody will care what your name is."

It was a big boost to my confidence. 

Aitana Bonmati caught up to me quickly as I walked to the gym. 

"You are big now." I chuckled but did not look over, I didn't need to really. "But not that big. You are only 15, si?"

"Yes, I am 15." 

I met Aitana when she first joined the club. She always used to say that she would steal me and take me home with her because she thought I was adorable. It is strange that I am now sort of in the same team as her. 

She started playing for the first team when I was 8. I was older then, I played my own football and liked staying with Alexia so I could kick a ball around with her teammates when they were done. 

Aitana was one of the few who would stay every time I was there. When Alexia didn't want to wait she would drive me home herself, all the way to the other side of Barcelona. We would always stop for ice cream on the way home. 

"I have not seen you in too long, Lena. I have missed you a lot but you have been doing very well in the B team. I am very proud and I take credit for your abilities." She spoke in such a dead pan voice but it was somehow still filled with emotion. 

"I have missed you too, ABC." It was a nickname I gave her the first time she drove me home. I had been learning about the alphabet in English class and had the little song stuck in my head when she told me her full name. I used to sing her initials in the tune of the song but it quickly merged to me just saying the three letters. 

"I have been to a few of your games, you know?" 

I look at her in confusion, I have never seen her there. She just nods. 

"Alexia never invited any of us but she was never at the ones I went to so I would sit in the stands with a hat and glasses so people wouldn't recognise me, but I was there. I went to your La Masia games as well. You have become a phenomenal player, Lena."

She has always spoken with such sincerity. I have missed her a lot. 

"Maybe you can drop me off at home again tonight? I have missed you."

She chuckles and pulls me into a side hug. 

"I was waiting for you to ask, little Lena. Oh you are not so little any more!"

I chuckle as well and let my head fall onto her shoulder as we enter the gym. My eyes scan the room, looking at all of the players on their equipment, nerves quickly settling inside me. 

"Don't worry, it's all easy." Aitana seems to read my mind. "Just come with me and I will show you how to do everything. It will become second nature in the next few days."

The gym session went quickly as I was taught all the different exercises. I was familiar with most of them, having done a very similar program in the past with the B team. 

We went out onto the field to do some drills and I played well. Jonatan was impressed and so were the first players. My teammates? Maybe, not quite, I don't think. I still haven't been in a team list, so I suppose I'll be their teammate when that eventually happens. 

It wasn't until we reached the ice cream shop that Aitana started asking me all the awkward questions. I should have seen it coming. 

"Why do you never come to our games anymore, Lena?" I was very grateful for the scoops of gelato in my hands. Eating it delayed my response as I tried to come up with something to say. I shrug as I eat.

I can not say it is because I do not get along with Alexia. It is too hard for me to say now, even after all these years. 

"I'm not sure. I suppose I got busy with my own training and school. I have been to a few but I usually go home with Alba pretty quickly after they finish." It is only half a lie but she just shrugs, apparently not believing my words. 

"And why is it that I am driving you home from your first ever first team training? I thought Alexia would have wanted to." I anticipated a question like this but that does not mean I wanted her to actually ask it. 

"Alexia is busy." I hope that Aitana understands I don't want to talk about it. I haven't spoken about my broken relationship with my sister to anyone. I think she can sense something is wrong though, because she puts her spoon back into her ice cream and grabs my arm so I am staring right at her. 

"If you ever want to talk, I am right here, Lena. I know you don't like people knowing what is going on inside that crazy head of yours but it is good to release your feelings." 

She definitely knows something is wrong so I appreciate her not pushing. 

"I have outlets, I play football, I play the piano, I am ok, aitana, I really am." 

She eyed me as if to say she didn't believe me but dropped the topic anyway. 

"When did you get so good?"

chapter II

[fairystarstorm]

Thinking about what's going wrong with Arcane s2

I have not finished s2 yet (still need to finish act 3 but basically got all the major spoilers). I feel like a big problem with this season and why the Z vs P conflict fizzled out is that so many characters are simply not in the that narrative anymore. Especially since they all had interesting stories to explore in regards to it. And if they are apart of the plot line, the things that would make things more interesting are simply ignored.

Taken from the narrative

Heimdinger: the founder of the city realising that the society he built ain't shit and that he failed Zaun by not helping to uplift and protect them (instead of just picking out a pupil from Zaun and calling it a day). All that Talk about how destructive magic could be in the wrong hands while realising he build a society filled with those exact wrong hands because of his inaction. Him actually putting in the work to change and dismantle those structures and belief systems that he allowed to grow in the first place

Jace: He goes against his own morals once again to build weapons for Caitlyn and her team. But we get none of the introspection or the regret that should have gone with it. Why because he is off in an alternative reality fighting for his life. He finds out that Hextech is poisoning Ekko's tree and there's nothing more to that conversation?? If something had gone wrong with the core it could have destroyed Zaun? Something could have happened that could have disabled or killed many others like it did with Viktor. But let's gloss over it. Him reconciling with his actions as a councilor??? That kid really was just a blip in his life i guess.

Viktor: a big problem I feel with Viktor's character is that he can feel very removed from Zaun at times. Like we never got to see his horror about Hextech being used against his people. We never got to know about any family or how he actually felt about being resurrected. What his plan was for Zaun beyond making a little commune. A huge part of that is also because they barely let this man have meaningful interactions with anyone in s2 besides ghost Sky and Jace. Vi, Jinx, Vander and Isha going to his commune could have been a possibility for that. Because even though I do believe that Vander and him did not know each other personally, I don't think he would not have known of him. Also we barely hear him talk meaningfully about his identity as a Zaunite in Piltover

Ekko (and the firelights in general): In my opinion the biggest snub. The others character arcs were mostly about other things in s1 (piltover politics, hextech etc.) but Ekko's whole motivation was to protect his ppl from both the enforcers and Silco. However we didn't get to see him deal with the rise of enforcers in the undercity or Sevika being the one to try and unite Zaun. We didn't get to see him grapple with the fact that Vi became an enforcer or that he was wrong to place his trust in Caitlyn. And even though I love how ep7 is highlighting his good qualities I wish they were explored in his timeline. Him being there would have also allowed for more spotlights for the firelights and Zaunites in general. None of the other people in the cast (Except for Vander) are as involved with regular people in Zaun then he was. It makes Zaun feel less complex and lived in beyond the visuals.

Mel: Considering that they are setting up her mother as the true big bad (which flattened the Z vs P conflict + general bad writing surrounding ambessa which i won't discuss now), it would have been nice to have her be able to react. Like in the beginning of the season we get it a little bit with Mel using spies to figure out her mother's plans. We could have had her realise that Piltover is not fundamentally different from Noxus because of how easy it was for her mother to take over. Only that the violence they dish out is different between the 2 cities. We could have had her sit that in both cases she is part of the oppressive class and that she was only acting out of self interest rather than actually caring about these issues. Instead of her being Kidnapped to get powers, let her finish the story arch that had been set up for her in s1.

Underexplored

Sevika (And Jinx): her involvement with Silco and how that is seen by Zaunites that are not chembarons. Ppl being unwilling to trust or listen to Sevika pleading for united Zaun when she was apart of Silco's operations make sense. Silco brought shimmer into Zaun. Ekko says that a lot of the firelights joined because of how it ruined their lives. Sevika having to struggle with her role in it and how it ultimately makes it harder for the to reach her goal would have been satisfying! Also her showing up after episode 4 would have been nice in general. Also same with ekko, she was the only one who was reaching out and communicating with different groups of Zaun. She and Ekko were windows into Zaun society that they just kept closed for some reason.

Vi: Just everything man.... her trauma, her choosing to be an enforcer, her alcoholism... her relationship with Jinx/powder, her guilt, her role as protector who seems to be failing no matter what she does. All kinda of flushed through the drains for caitvi to be able to exist (yes i dislike caitvi, no i also don''t really care for jayvik or timebomb and i am also a lesbian).

Jinx: I thinks she has been done quite well so far but I have heard for how her arch ends and it is just bad..... also wished they explored Isha more and what Vander coming back would mean for Jinx

Caitlyn: wish they would actually put the responsibility of her actions onto her instead of Ambessa/Jinx killing her mom. Also the fact it was never addressed that even in s1 she was microagressive as fuck towards Zaunites. Yes she eventually saw the need for independence (after talking to Ekko mind you) but does that mean anything if when she was in power due was actively making things worse for Zaun. She could have started working kn redeeming herself but the fact that the narrative/the writers don't want to put the full blame on her just makes that idea seem laughable

Tbh a lot of it has to do with the fact that the writers didn't let characters interact with each other for long periods of time or deal with the consequences of their actions but hey at least the coplesbians fucked and the scientists had their madoka magica moment

[kvothbloodless]

Looking into the business side of the UHC shooting has really shifted my perspective on how to approach the practicalities of "greedy" businesses and similar things. To be clear, it hasn't in any way affected (and thus I'm not at all talking about) the purely moral side of things.

Disclaimers: Obviously for profit healthcare is morally repugnant, etc. etc. Please do not yell at me about the morality of private healthcare or how this entire post is evil because I'm discussing the situation at hand rather than the ideal world where we have public healthcare. Also, while I've done a decent amount of research over the past few days, I am still the furthest thing from an expert here, so please take everything I say with a heaping handful of salt, and feel encouraged to correct me if I make any dumb mistakes. Also also, most of this was realized by talking with friends, I did not just have an epiphany on my own.

That aside though, I've been looking at profit margins, and what contributes to costs. Mostly for the healthcare industry (insurance, hospitals, pharma, etc.) but I think this applies to most businesses (at least in America; this entire post is from a very American perspective). To vastly oversimplify, there are two types of corporate "greed", and the general categories of possible solutions look different.

The first is the one that Tumblr seems to treat as the only category, the one that we’re all thinking of when we say "corporate greed". This is where companies fuck over their customers/public to make big numbers even bigger, so they can keep expanding, make shareholders absurd amounts of money, etc (even this isn't actually that simple, but it is relatively kinda simple). This kind of greed can be affected/"fixed" by public pushback, government regulations, etc. Pharma companies fall into this category. The industry average for profit margins for pharma corps is in the large double digits, somewhere upwards of 50% (and to be clear that's taking into account the genuinely massive amounts of money they're investing into research and development, just to head off that line of argument). If a drug company is price gouging on a medication and it becomes a public scandal, they can easily afford to cut the price by A Lot, and still make a profit overall. If you pass laws that simply impose stricter regulations on production, or that cap prices, the companies will object and grumble and try to get around them, because that's what companies do. But at the end of the day, it's theoretically possible to just tell them to cut that shit out, and they Can do it.

Critically though, at least in healthcare, this is Not the category health insurance falls into. Nor most healthcare! This category only applies to businesses with a decent profit margin; the industry average for profit margins for both health insurance and hospitals is in the low single digits (and even though the executives are obviously insanely overpaid and ridiculously greedy, they still account for only a tiny fraction of these companies' budgets! Slashing the pay and bonuses of execs is not going to solve this problem)! Yes they're making Billions of dollars, but they're also spending billions. “Necessary” spending. We can discuss and debate Why this is the case (though it seems clear to me that the main culprits are massive inefficiency due to lack of centralization and the artificial, imposed scarcity on the number of new doctors and medical facilities), but I'm not interested in that here.

My point here is that, while obviously the execs of United Healthcare are greedy bastards willing to screw people over to make an extra .1% profit, the current system is set up such that they sort of have to be (again, this is not a moral justification). Like, the money has to come from somewhere! In the absence of government subsidies, a private insurance company is operating pretty close to the razors edge; if UHC wants to accept more claims, they've got to have higher premiums, or screw over their own employees across the board, or make up the money somewhere else (and again, slashing exec salaries and bonuses will not make a big dent here). This means that they are Not going to be nearly as amenable to public pushback, and even simple government regulations won't really work. If the government told UHC that they needed to accept more claims without raising premiums a corresponding amount (or slash all employees' salaries, etc.), then either UHC will find a way around those new regulations, or they will go bankrupt, and everyone they insured will have to go buy insurance from another company that did one of those other things.

While you Can rightfully still call this behavior greedy, it seems to me an obviously different Type of greed compared to the first category. It's a sort of systemically Enforced greed, rather than one owing to any given board's choices. Like, in the absence of single payer healthcare (obviously a better option), insurance companies Must be horrible and greedy because if they are not they will stop being a functioning company. And you can't really pass the buck! The profit margins for medical facilities and specialists and such are all equally small. This isn't a situation where you can say "well the insurance companies are unnecessary", because healthcare (in its current form, in the USA) itself is pretty expensive to pay for!

Prices are negotiated between a healthcare facility and each insurance corporation, so it gets a bit more complicated, but at the end of the day, these businesses rely on both the reliable but individually lower income from insurance companies, and the sporadic but insane price gouging they charge for people without insurance. And this sucks! But that doesn't change the fact that if you tell a hospital or whatever that they must significantly reduce how much they charge for, say, an MRI, or even an annual checkup, then they must either find a way to charge more elsewhere and make it up; they must fire employees or lower wages, lowering the quality of care; or they will go out of business. They just don't have a large enough profit margin to handle any sort of significant reduction in income.

Aha! I hear you say. While slashing executives salaries and bonuses wouldn't put a dent in expenses, slashing doctor's salaries would! And you'd be correct, to a degree. However, doctors have massive amounts of medical debt, and also regularly work 12+ hour shifts. Until that changes, significantly reducing their salaries (and it would need to be a Large reduction to make a useful dent in costs) is an extremely thorny issue.

So where am I going with this? No idea, to be honest. Except to say that, issues with murder and such aside, putting the fear of god into insurance CEOs quite literally Cannot make a major difference long or even medium-term. They simply do not have enough profit margin to play around with. As I said way earlier, this is not the sort of corporate greed that can be significantly "fixed" by public action or simple government regulations; without a major change in the entire system, private insurance companies are fairly essential to people getting decent healthcare, and those companies are obligated to be awful and greedy, or they will go bankrupt. I know I'm coming dangerously close to mentioning game theory and summoning Moloch, though this is really a couple levels below that, so I'll stop here.

Oh, except to say that, if you're dead set on shooting a CEO, go for a pharma corp one rather than health insurance.

[ghouldtime]

I need more neighbor König getting protective over his little neighbor.

I do believe he can get very possessive, though I'm not sure that's the word I'm looking for. But he's lost so much, so many people in his unit and people he had once considered friends. He won't even visit his own mother because he's scared for her safety. Maybe an enemy finds out some way some how about her and takes her as leverage. Now she gets to see colonel konig with his gear and mask and barking orders and not the sweet man she's come to know. How would he react or feel?

Ofc when she realizes it's just him and throws her arms around him

I'm sorry but I'm answering this because this doesn't fall under my characterization of him 😭 I can do the last part maybe one day when I'm not sick and have planned everything out in my mind THOROUGHLY

I know you meant no harm by this either!! This is just a bit of a rambly tangent to describe WHO my König is and why he's that way.

(Also stating that reader in neighbor isn't explicitly a she nor are they little in the same way. I write gender neutral for a reason! They're a grown adult)

Like I know it's just an imagine and possible scenario but for me I just don't really see it happening unless quite literally EVERYTHING went wrong. He's got plan A, plan B, plan C, D, and E. Always be prepared.

But it strikes me as unlikely in happening at all as he is a VERY cautious man and does what he can to remove his identity as König from his residential life. He keeps his gear under lock and key, he doesn't tell personal details of his work, he doesn't want to track ANY of that back. His field life isn't his personal life and he's intent on keeping that separated. Anything that could be used to identify him, he doesn't keep around or its hidden so NO ONE would suspect it.

It would take some absolute major intel and someone working within KorTac itself to follow him like that - even then, dude is a bit paranoid. He's got a security system for a reason, he doesn't wear his mask in public, his body is covered up usually by the long clothes he wears, he's not out socializing - he's just blending in. He's watching cars that pass, he usually keeps curtains drawn or has privacy film, he knows who drives what car and their schedules - so if it's off, he's picking it up.

The way he's protective is in his actions - that's WHY he won't tell details of his work, that's WHY he works hard to ensure personal life doesn't meddle with what his job is, that's WHY he has backup plans. That's WHY he makes sure they get a security system too, if they haven't had one already. That's why he makes sure they're trained in self defense and have at least some form of weapon at the ready, even though they ARE in a safe area. He's protective in the sense of "I'm doing what I can to prevent that aspect of my life from coming into yours" , he's protective in the sense of "I've seen what people are capable of, I've protected myself so I'm protecting you too as much as I can because you matter to me". He's protective in the sense he's caring, he's going out of his way to make sure you're safe.

But he's not going to be protective in the sense of "let me be with you constantly" or "who were you talking to???" or "Why didn't you invite me". Reader is a grown, independent adult and he's aware of that. He's respectful of that and knows they're capable of caring for themselves too. Being IN their life doesn't mean he IS their life. They both operate in their own lives and have their own interests and both, as such, need alone time and time to spend with others too. That's just how to have healthy relationships.

He's very independent himself and having another person around as his friend has taken a significant adjustment period. Honestly, it takes a long time for him to even register that he can go do things with them. He's so used to being on his own that it has to catch up.

And I'm going to say that my König is NEVER possessive towards people. Never. Possessive implies treating them like an object or piece of property, like they're something that's his alone. Possessive means great insecurity in his sense of relationships to the extent where he's manipulating them and monopolizing their lives for his gain.

He's not, because he's a well adjusted adult who has been to therapy throughout his life to manage his own insecurities, especially involving interpersonal relationships. Hell, when he STARTED to even get feelings for neighbor, he brought it up to said therapist just to be sure he's going down the right path. He's built a set of healthy behaviors to cope with unhealthy feelings that may arise.

He gets jealous, especially initially, but once again - he's a grown adult and is capable of handling his own insecurities in a productive way. Everyone is allowed to have more than one person in their lives and a healthy network of relationships matters.

Protective? Yes. Possessive? Absolutely not. He respects independence as he himself is that way. He wants to spend as much time as possible with his neighbor but he realizes that he too needs his own space and time to recharge, and he can't be singularly focused on one person alone. His primary concern is their safety, no matter what they do.

He's lost many comrades and brothers in arms but that's also bound to happen in his line of work. This might sound brutal, but he's desensitized to it to a degree. Losing someone is never easy, but it's expected. The blow will always hurt but when it's always a possibility, it never wanes. He's wary of it and aware of it, and losing any friends he made happened earlier on in the army before his private contracting days. It numbed him too it and set the precedent for his relationships with anyone and is why he's so guarded.

After then, he's not really had many friends. Not that he had many to begin with but he doesn't go out of his way to get close to others. Acquaintances and work buddies? Yes. But friends are a rarity as he's really rather unapproachable. He's there to do his job, he's there to take people down and get paid, he's wary of getting close to ANYONE knowing they can be taken at any moment. He'll work with them, he'll know them, he'll be proud of them - but making friends and forming personal relationships like that in a private military contracting company is a bad idea, when they can easily swap over to the other side if they're offered more pay. He's seen it happen, he knows it's a real possibility.

That's why he picks any personal relationships closely and takes eons to warm up. His social anxiety, as well managed as it is, doesn't make it any easier. He knows what can happen, so he prepares as best as he can. Which INCLUDES being protective and prepared, and planning accordingly. If he's letting anyone into his life, he's already got a game plan for what he'll do.

And no, he DOES visit his mother, as I've stated! As much as his work allows and as much as possible, he does visit. He just doesn't live with or near her. He can easily visit throughout the year when his schedule allows and its sporadic, with no rhyme or reason. He doesn't take repeating cars, he doesn't do anything in a pattern that can be tracked. He's also made sure she's secure in her home too so it's unlikely things will happen, but he won't flat out not communicate with her and not see her at all. He's just smart and careful about it! He can't bare to never see her again.

I'm sorry but my König just doesn't fall under how most people portray him or see him. He's just a guy with his own personal issues. And like the proper guy that he is, he manages them and knows its his responsibility to do such. He's extensively gone to therapy, he's worked on himself, he knows where he stands.

Sure, he's still prone to jealousy and a touch of paranoia, but that doesn't mean he lacks the skills to work through them. He communicates like an adult with whatever he's feeling. Expressing it can be hard but he DOES get it out there and he also heavily respects reader's own autonomy. They're an adult, so is he. He'll protect them and do what he can, he'll care about them, but he will never seek to control them or treat them like something for only HIM to have. He's not and will never be a "they're MINE and NO ONE touches what's mine" - that's just not him to me. I don't write him as a big, broody dommy guy who is growling every sentence or can't handle others talking to someone he likes.

To me, he's just a dude. An introverted guy who likes to sew ridiculous pillows and tend to his garden who is happy in the home he made for himself. He's comfortable with who he is and where he stands. He can communicate properly, knows how to respect boundaries, and likes seeing others who matter to him happy in their lives as they establish a supportive network. Just because he isn't always with them or going with them doesn't mean they can't take care of themselves or he HAS to be there. He's not some ultra possessive dude because he has healthy understandings of boundaries and knows the world doesn't revolve around him and his wants (also he wouldn't WANT them to depend on him and him alone when its very possible he too will die on the field one day). He's not always going to look over your shoulder or instantly treat any other person as a threat.

He's seasoned with the things he's seen and is wary enough to be protective and to do what he knows to prevent what he's seen happen. He's cautious, he's considerate, he's caring - and he's not a cunt about it. Really, he's just perceptive and accepts what can happen so he tries to set up anyone in his life for success to avoid what he's seen and to keep them from harm. He can't always be there, he knows he can't, so ensuring that those around him who he DOES care about have a proper, healthy network of friends around for support and have a game plan for if shit hits the fan (as well as a system to enact it) is his way of showing he cares and can always be with them and help, even if he's long gone or buried six feet under.

[utilitycaster]

How can Molly's death be considered a major mistake? It's the crux of the entire campaign.

so I think about this a lot, because you're right, and it really comes down to like...a lot of factors in how people interact with fiction, and some stuff I feel about fandom.

The short answer is that Molly is some people's favorite character, and they really wanted to watch him for 141 episodes and not just 26, and they didn't get to, and so it's valid to feel sad about that. But I think what personally grinds my gears is the idea that it's a mistake and because this is a Fan Favorite character he SHOULD have come back. Setting aside the fact that he had both his fans and his detractors from the start and a lot of people (myself included) who found him irritating didn't say much for a good chunk of C2 because, well, he was dead, this isn't a fucking competitive reality show. You don't get to vote on your phones to decide who wins a resurrection.

I think the longer answer is that there is a certain type of person in fandom, born of a certain type of person in social media communities, who just...is not willing or interested in considering not just that their experiences, preferences, and philosophy are not universal, but also that they are not objectively best and correct and that everyone who disagrees is wrong. It's often really common in, though not exclusive to, people who have particularly limited experiences - young (like, teenager/early 20s), people who haven't lived in a diverse area or in multiple different areas, people who for whatever reason do not get out much - which both makes sense (haven't been exposed to a ton of different perspectives irl) but also means that you get people who, for all they may talk about global politics, kind of unconsciously seem to act as though everyone they interact with online is a variant of someone from the same 3000 person town in the United States in which they've spent all 21 years of their life. ANYWAY getting back to the main point I feel like Molly attracted a lot of that kind of person, who just...doesn't get that while Molly is, to them, a deeply validating expression of gender identity, for many people he is "guy you meet at your friend's birthday party in a two-bedroom 6 floor walk up and within 5 seconds he has pissed you off so profoundly with his overfamiliarity that you go into the kitchen and mainline as much vanilla vodka as possible to not stab this guy with a secondhand knife that says "CHEESE!" on it even though you hate vanilla vodka and it's summer in NYC and you're on the 6th floor in a small apartment with too many people so it's approximately 117 degrees Fahrenheit in this kitchen and the vodka isn't much cooler, and you succeed in this goal, and then after sending your friend who couldn't make it because they were at a family thing that weekend a picture of a rat on the tracks of the 3 train with a caption "this u?" at 1:54 in the morning you're like "so this guy Molly was there" and they're like "oh my god I met him at Cameron's last party, he SUCKS" and you're like "I KNOW". Like a lot of people just do not get that Molly was very popular with their circle, and also a lot of people either were neutral-to-not-feeling-it. This is before we get into the post-death idealization of who he was that takes him from "irritating but I think he'd have grown on me in some ways eventually had he lived" to "horrible and insufferable fake-ass bitch."

And then we get to the true impasse: the idea that something that does not fulfill every single one of your personal wishes might still be a great story.

I'm certainly not perfect, and there's things I thought I wanted for the end of C2 that I didn't get, and there's some things I do wish we'd have gotten to see (or that we'd have done in C3), but I like to think that I try to remain at least partially open to the possibilities. I like to think that my enjoyment of a story isn't contingent on whether one single character survives, even if they are my favorite (and I say this as someone whose favorite ASOIAF character was immediately Ned Stark, a statement that should surprise no one who follows me) nor that the story precisely reaffirms my existing worldview. I want stories to tell me something new and interesting that wouldn't come from my own head, and I want them to sell me on it. I think that a lot of people lost the thread of the importance of representation, namely, they forgot that while it's great to see people like you in a story, you should also be trying to see people not like you and perspectives that aren't yours. I am extremely defensive of my and other people's right to say "I didn't like this story and here is why" without someone being like "Give it a chance! Here's why I think it's good" but at the same time, there is a difference between "I really wish Molly had stayed alive and I don't like that he died," and "everything that happened after he died was A Mistake because it wasn't what I Wanted, and someone should fix this." Like that's what toddlers do. That's not an adult way of interacting with narrative.

So those people don't even get to the point of "the entire campaign is deeply influenced by the loss of Molly; that is what binds the rest of the Nein together and makes them what they are; the fact that Lucien wears the face of a departed friend is crucial to the entire final arc comprising about 20% of the campaign; and the fact that he does not come back, but someone new, with new chances and new choices to make does is emblematic of a campaign about people who find that they cannot undo their pasts, but neither are they trapped or damned by them." They're stuck at "guy I liked died and I'm throwing a tantrum 6 years later."

[prettyoddfever]

re: the Fever-era stage gay routines

I'm integrating a previous post into this one so I can cover all of the pre-split years and everything in one place. Again, I'm iffy on the term "stage gay" but idk how else to describe it so here we go.

So Brendon said this quote in 2018: "For our first headline tour I would go up to Ryan our guitar player, and like kiss him on the neck or kiss him on the mouth and he would be so mad. I was like, I just want to kiss you bro."

Ignoring all history & precedent of the way that Brendon tends to exaggerate for effect and often goes for the general idea & how he feels at the moment when looking back rather than actual specific facts... he's still talking about the band's first headlining tour in April 2006. And yeah, that's the only season where I think this quote MIGHT be plausible. If the situation actually played out exactly as Brendon says, then of course that's not ok. But you still can't project that scenario onto literally every part of the Fever era or form your entire perception of a whole era (or an entire work relationship) off of one single interview quote from years later. That's going to leave you with an incredibly distorted understanding of the band's dynamics with each other & fans, Ryan's input and stage presence, and what's actually going on in the pictures you're looking at. Like people are clearly missing so much context if they're able to look at a picture of the IWSNT mic-sharing from summer 2006 and think that it was one-sided sexual harassment (or some kind of actual Ryden thing).

THE EARLY MONTHS

So the guys weren’t super close onstage in late 2005… they were mostly trying to figure out how to even be onstage lol. They watched the bands they were touring with and learned as they went. You could almost see little pieces of each band’s influence show up for a while. Brendon totally modeled himself after Jason Vena in early fall 2005, and then he had clearly been watching William Beckett closely in early 2006 (that influence carried on throughout the year). It was also interesting to watch Brendon navigate what he thought fans wanted or expected when he was an 18-year-old boy thrown into an international spotlight with girls (and boys) screaming “f— me!” at him (one example). It really looked like he learned to play into a role (this is included). And I mean that in terms of being a popular frontman. That’s not even taking into consideration the actual way that Brendon needed to adopt a persona onstage throughout the whole Fever era. Look at the type of songs he had to sing. Both Brendon & Ryan talked a lot in 2005-2006 about how Brendon needed to get into a character onstage to deliver the risque lyrics.

The types of halfhearted moves that Brendon started to make on Ryan by the end of the Truckstops & Statelines tour looked like he was just following the example of bands he’d been watching on tour. Brendon started making bigger moves on Ryan in April once P!ATD had to step up their game for their first headlining tour (which happened 8 months after they played their first show ever). That UK tour had some shows that were bigger than the first half of the summer tour in North America. There were times in 2006 when I felt like P!ATD was more of a UK band than American partially because of how intense the frenzy was over there.

Brendon was still testing different stage personas and figuring things out during this season, and the band still felt like 4 separate guys trying to find their footing. They were talented & good, but there was absolutely a huge shift in the band itself once Jon arrived in May. They finally felt like a strong united group. They went back to their practice space for a while in May to figure out the details of what they wanted their band to be like onstage, rehearse with their two new touring musicians + Lucent Dossier, and re-learn updated versions of their songs. The last half of the Fever era was polished and very intentional... they felt like a different band by June in many ways.

THE SUMMER TOUR

I thought this seemed like the picture that really got the Ryden craze going in summer 2006 (before fans had totally decided on the “Ryden” name – some were saying “Bryan”). It was taken a few days into the summer tour:

There were a ton of new fans arriving during the summer tour, so that picture formed some first impressions. By this summer many fans would basically only ask people to describe the moments when Ryan & Brendon came near each other at a show and every look they shared. People who went to shows would mention how at different points they saw one of the four guys suppress a laugh when the crowd would positively scream if Brendon & Ryan came within two feet of each other.

The Panic guys were well aware of what their fans wanted and what was being said online (for better or worse). Yes, they got annoyed during the last half of the year when fans took things too far or were focused more on Ryden stuff than the music, but it seemed like they also wanted to have fun with a fanbase that they were being increasingly distanced from as they became more & more famous. There were quite a few stories of Brendon and Ryan playing up the Ryden angle at meet & greets throughout the last half of 2006 to make fans laugh or freak out (and Ryan initiated some of that, so it wasn’t purely Brendon). There's more in this post.

The point is that the shows in this tour were very intentional and felt more like watching a theater show than the type of band who interacted with their audience (which was a huge fan complaint this season tbh). Ryan was more confident & comfortable onstage with his new makeup, was actively engaging in mic sharing and playing into what the crowds obviously wanted to see, and seemed like he was largely in control of how the shows would go even if he still sometimes shied away from attention in general onstage.

Ryan & Brendon did continue some of their antics at random international shows in August & October, but it kind of seemed to depend on the audience. Those shows were also a different vibe from the national tours.

NOTHING RHYMES WITH CIRCUS

This season was on a whole other level, so here's a separate post that goes into important detail!!

^^^ seriously, please read.

The creepy leering character that Brendon was playing during the NRWC tour is obviously not his actual personality, nor his typical onstage character for the whole Fever era (although I did see hints of it return during the 2008 Halloween show when Brendon was in his vampire costume lol).

AFTER THE FEVER ERA

The band played a handful of regular shows in 2007 like any other band. They wore jeans and dropped the stage gay & makeup because those elements were part of the Fever-era shows and that era was done now.

Ryan did try to instigate parts of their former routine at the first show in 2007 before the band had found their new direction, though.

Brendon kissed Ryan on the cheek at Bamboozle 2007 when wishing him a happy birthday.

The Pretty. Odd. era was completely different on so many levels. Ryan & Jon largely ran those shows and the new music didn’t require a dramatic frontman in an entertainer/narrator role anymore. Ryan was WAY more confident onstage and would often stroll over to mess with Brendon or share his mic. Ryan was the one who often instigated any interaction. Jon even slapped Brendon’s butt at some shows. A lot of fans would claim that Ryan kissed Brendon’s cheek, but in hindsight I think it’s more likely that he was whispering to Brendon and knew that fans would get overly excited. Also, the moment where Brendon kissed Ryan’s cheek before Mad as Rabbits at Glastonbury was definitely not the norm.

ABOUT THE ROUTINE "RYDEN" MOMENTS IN 2008 (not on the same level as 2006, but still pandering to what fans wanted).

COMMON FEVER ERA MOMENTS

a few examples...

MISC. THOUGHTS

The point of this post is to show that the endless pictures that some people might share of "Ryden" moments or "Brendon sexually harassing Ryan" are often like the same points of the same songs on different nights, or just taken out of context of the actual Fever era. To be clear, I’m not attempting to excuse/explain every single thing Brendon ever did in this post, or attempting to speak for Ryan... idk what he was comfortable with or everything that went down between them.

However, I do think that people who assume Brendon forced Ryan into anything (in any aspect of the band) don’t understand their work relationship or the pre-split band’s dynamics & who had the power. That band was waaaay different than the one that Brendon had in later years. Back then he wasn’t really in a position to pressure Ryan into anything creatively-speaking (more info here). Ryan was shy in interviews, but he was in no way a pushover within the band… and to assume something like that kind of discredits his massive contributions. With the amount of control that Ryan had, I just really don’t think he would have let something so prominent get worked into the shows if he wasn’t ok with it in the first place (let alone instigate it himself sometimes).

Ryan talked a lot in the pre-split years about how he really wanted to challenge fans, push boundaries, do something different, shake things up, and keep experimenting instead of settling into a rut of what was comfortable/familiar. In a Danish interview in October 2006 he said "we do not want to be a safe band, neither with our songs nor our shows."

I thought the stage gay element seemed to loosely fit into those goals & ideas. But at the same time, I don't think it was ever that defined. It felt like it was just a random fun thing & wasn't that deep. Spin asked Ryan if he and Brendon were toying with the idea of bisexuality, which was a bit annoying because their antics obviously weren't that legit or a Serious Statement. I liked Ryan's answer:

[skitskatdacat63]

Happy Birthday to Seb, and Seb only.

+ some explanations

I realized as I was making this, some of the little stuff probably only makes sense to me, and maybe people who have been following me for a while atp. So I wanted to explain some of the little details I included cause I really love them!!

First of all, I wanted to incude my original sketch for this(from like 5 hours ago lmfao), bcs I find it sooooo cute. Look at him!! Little guy!

I. Fernando's Gift

This is of course a reference to the Fernando teddy bear, but more specifically to the vettonso comic with the bear I drew a while ago. As you can see from my sketch, this is the first gift I came up, which I'm pretty happy about!! It's always so cute to me no matter its form. Though...I don't think teddy bears existed yet in the early 1700s, but Fernando found a way, okay? I like to think Fernando is all gruff in the beginning, but gives Seb this or something similar and remarks "to keep you company when I'm back in Spain," and then he has to pretend he has food poisoning rather than living with having said something so sappy.

II. Mark's Gift

I don't think this is really a reference to any specific post of mine. Dog!Mark is just an important Mark characterization in general, but especially in boy king au where he is really reduced to the status of dog by virtue of his upbringing and vocation. He definitely plays this off as wanting Seb to get another hunting dog(something he advocates for often. Seb knows it's entirely self motivated but loves to humor him bcs its cute to see how much he loves dogs. Well Seb loves dogs too, one dog in particular-)

III. Jenson's Gift

AAAAHHHH I'm so proud of this one bcs of how many leves there are to it!! I couldn't for the life of me think of what Jense would gift him but then I remembered I characterize him as horse obsessed(read: ye olde carfucker.) So this is basically the ye olde version of him getting Seb ultra detailed minatures of his cars. HOWEVER this is also a callback to one of my favorite posts I've ever made, back when I translated Seb's car names into Latin. So it was fun to actually get to canonize that in a way. ALSO! BTW! Those horses are specifically Lipizzans, which are a very iconic horse breed in the Habsburg Empire and Vienna specifically. A horse breed sought after by the Habsburgs for both war but also riding schools, and they still remain as the breed of horse trained in Vienna's Spanish Riding School today. The emperor Seb is based on comissioned the school's main riding hall, and his portrait still hangs above where the riders enter. So I thought that was a fun little easter egg to include!

Also the characterization in this is so funny. I guess I'd consider them a polycule, like they're a unit and all have interesting relationships between each other. But one of the main focuses is the kinda love triangle between sebmarknando. Like Mark and Fernando constantly fighting for Seb'cs undivided affection and attention. But as per usual, Jenson, who is on the sidelines, swoops in effortlessly with the most perfect gift ever. I feel like he understands and gets along with Seb the best out of the three, but just doesn't want to deal with such a complicated thing so he's satisfied being a bit distant(he secretly takes a lot of joy one-upping the other two. It's impossible to not crave your ruler's attention, no?)

[onlymurdersintheafterparty]

OMITB S4:E6 “Blow Up”

YOU GUYS I AM SHOOK. THIS EPISODE WAS A WHOLE ROLLERCOASTER AND SINCE THE EPISODE ENDED MENTALLY I FEEL LIKE I’VE STEPPED OFF THE RIDE WITH MY LEGS FEELING LIKE JELLY

There are so many things to unpack that I’m just going to focus on the top 2 moments that had me shook and then a new theory after the reveal in the last few minutes of the episode.

Spoilers Ahead (I’m serious watch the episode first because of all the episodes to get spoiled this one will really have you messed up)

“I’m Watching You” / Double Murders

This is what had me mentally screaming because what do you mean Dudenoff has been dead this entire time and Sazz was right about there being another murderer in the building?! And the handwriting in the texted pic is the same as the one in the first season that appeared before Winnie was poisoned. Now before this episode a LOT of people theorized this very plot about a unsolved murder or cold case so I’m sure they feel vindicated after this episode. Many people think that it’s Lester who is the mastermind and I’m sure are even more suspicious now because he used to be an actor while others think it’s Uma. I agree with the first group and think it's Lester and I think his accomplice is Marshall P. Pope the writer.

Evidence Against Lester

He was homeless and out of work when he started working at The Arconia; After being hired he could have met Dudenoff in the lobby at some point and while talking film/acting, he could have mentioned being homeless and was brought into the $200 rent scheme and temporarily lived in the West Wing; It would also give him free reign of The Arconia after hours

As doorman, he has access to the different units; delivering the wrong mail gives him a chance to snoop or bug apartments because anyone passing him in the halls will just assume he's doing his job

As an actor, he could have worked with or was taught by Dudenoff

His son is an actor and Lester paid for the classes so where did the extra money come from?

He could be resentful of Charles because he's a successful actor living in a fancy building meanwhile he's stuck as a doorman; Charles being awkward could have been read as rudeness adding to that resentment (Vince thought Charles hated him because of their awkward window encounters)

People constantly bring up Lester returning Charles' hat in season one and it makes me wonder if he's ever impersonated Charles. They both have white hair, I'm not sure about the similarity in physical builds and height because of Lester's uniform and hat, but I've always had a sneaking suspicion someone has been posing as Charles here and there; Plus Charles doesn't really interact with his neighbors like that so if Lester disguised himself as Charles and wore a hat and hid his face no one would know or be shocked at him not saying hi back. And because Charles is friends with Oliver and Mabel, that would allow him to bug their apartments as well because they'd expect Charles to randomly visit his friends

In the 70s after the brothel got shut down, I'm sure the rent prices dropped drastically making it affordable for Dudenoff to purchase the entire floor

Lester killing Dudenoff would give him access to all those apartments and with the money from his side hustle, he can afford to pay off the police or whoever else he needs to keep the trio off his trail

Being homeless would have allowed him to meet some interesting people and if the alcoholism ever led to him serving any period of jail time he could have met criminals that became friends and allies to help do footwork behind the scenes over the past few seasons

This could also be how he got access to the poison in the attempt to kill Winnie

He could have killed Dudenoff out of revenge because he was promised a role that was rescinded or in a parallel to Ben and Charles, he was unfairly fired and held a grudge

Evidence Against Marshall

The biggest theory is that Marshall stole someone's script. I do agree with this theory but I don't think it was Sazz he stole it from, I think it was Lester

Marshall is a fan of the podcast so maybe at some point between seasons he went to go see the Arconia for himself; To get inside he'd have to go through Lester; If they got to talking about the podcast and films/screenwriting in general, Lester who was already spying on the trio could have by then written a film script in hopes of making a comeback; Lester has no connections from being out of work so he and Marshall come up with some sort of deal where Marshall will pitch the script and get Lester cast in the film;

Was Marshall a student of Dudenoff as well? That could be another connection between the two and instead of visiting The Arconia for the podcast he could have been in town to visit Dudenoff and bonded with Lester over that

Marshall knows how to do disguises but who could he impersonate that would actually be believable? I have no clue

If Marshall and Lester are accomplices there's a chance Marshall will be killed off before the season is over in an attempt to keep him from telling the truth

Dudenoff's Students:

Trina and Tawny

Vince Fish

Rudy Thurber

Sauce Family (unconfirmed)

Helga (unconfirmed)

Lester (unconfirmed)

Marshall (unconfirmed)

Other Observations:

I think Jan knows who the killer is and that’s why she went into hiding after escaping prison. As long as she’s lived in the Arconia I’m sure she’s seen some stuff plus game recognizes game so if she encountered another killer I’m sure she’d suspect it.

If Oliver is the second one targeted I wonder if Mabel is next; Jan did say that the killer would keep trying until they get it right

I don't think Howard is the Moriarty anymore and that it's definitely Lester

The Right Westie = Weird, Struggling Actors; The Westies pride themselves on being weird, outcasts and 2/5 are confirmed actors; Helga may have been run off or been paid off to leave and threatened to stay silent because she discovered Lester was impersonating Dudenoff and witnessed him cashing the checks

My attempt at an outline of what all went down with Lester & Dudenoff:

???? Lester becomes homeless and loses acting jobs because of alcoholism

???? Lester gets a job at The Arconia

???? Dudenoff teaches Rudy & Vince at some point

2011 Trina and Tawny meet Dudenoff in his film class; Notice that at first they're only filmed from the back and when we see through Dudenoff's lens, we only see what's within the lens so if the killer was in attendance they weren't seen onscreen

2012 Dudenoff gives the twins his cameras

2018* Dudenoff is killed (three years prior to pilot)

*the twins say the last time they spoke to him was three years ago and that he cut off communication because they moved to LA; Just because they didn't hear from him doesn't mean he actually died 3 years ago; No body = no way of checking the time of death

2021-2022 The trio's apartments are bugged at some point

Remaining Questions:

Who is the person in the Westie group pic with the scratched out face?

How long have the apartments been bugged?

If Dudenoff is dead, who has been impersonating him when addressing new tenants?

Does Dudenoff having replacement joints mean he was a stuntman as well? That would be yet another example of double identities this season

How long was the incinerator broken?

How long has Lester worked at The Arconia?

If Vince's pink eye is so contagious how did Eugene and Charles not get it despite being in close proximity?

If I missed anything from the first 2 seasons or got something wrong please let me know because I need my info as accurate as possible to figure this all out lol

[666writingcafe]

Questions (NB 14A)

A Side Chapter That Takes Place During Diavolo and MC's Impromptu Vacation After The Kingsblood Crucible

Slight NSFW Content Warning

I should have known this was coming. We've pretty much exhausted all other topics of conversations during our time here at the villa. Still, I didn't expect him to broach the subject so...abruptly. We were simply sitting outside and watching the sunset when he glances over at me and states calmly,

"So, you've fucked my butler." I nearly choke on my drink.

"I-Is that a bad thing?" I ask, setting it on the table between us.

"Not necessarily. I just want to know how it happened. He's normally not one to indulge in such pleasures." I pull up my text conversation with Barbatos on my D.D.D. and show it to Diavolo. He gently takes the phone away from me as he reads that particular string of texts between the two of us. When he finishes, he hands the phone back to me.

"I didn't realize you were attracted to each other," he remarks.

"He's a nice-looking man."

"That's all?" I nervously swallow.

"Well...we've managed to bond over metal music in both timelines. In fact, it's what led to it happening the first time."

"Really?" I nod, proceeding to tell him about the events leading up to and after the Severa concert I went to with my version of Barbatos.

"I see," he responds once I'm finished. "The main reason that I asked is because I've noticed Barbatos growing more attached to you. His scent's grown a lot stronger since your arrival, to the point where it seems as though he's not trying as hard to hide it as he once did." He briefly pauses before adding,

"It's also beginning to overpower yours, which is a bit of a shame. You smell nice." Out of context, this would be very creepy, but I know his comment is innocent enough.

"Is he this territorial over you in your timeline?"

"Not usually," I answer. "He was pretty handsy before the concert, but I think that's only because he felt like he could get away with it in that context, if that makes sense." Diavolo nods his head.

"He likes keeping his professional life separate from his personal." We each take sips out of our drinks. "So, obviously Solomon and you are like an unofficial married couple, but what's your relationship like with the others? Is it similar to what you have with Barbatos, or do you merely see them as friends and colleagues?" I swallow nervously. Having the future king of the Devildom wanting to know this aspect of my life is nerve-racking, to say the least. Would he think less of me after this?

"Well...to put it simply, I'm a wee bit of a whore when it comes to them." Diavolo hums lightly in response.

"Wouldn't have pegged you as the type."

"I didn't use to be, but then the exchange program happened, and as I got to know everyone, feelings naturally began forming, and one thing led to another, resulting in me wanting to engage in those activities more and more often."

"Interesting. Is there anyone in particular that you feel the most drawn to?"

"There's three."

"Including Solomon?" I nod my head. "And the other two?"

"Well...there's Lucifer." Another hum, this one deeper and more drawn out. As if he's displeased.

"That's always been a bit of a sore subject between us," I tell him. "In fact, I think that's part of why we really didn't get along at first. I felt like you were taking advantage of him, and you thought that I was taking him away from you." Diavolo sighs.

"Lucifer...he means a lot to me. He's unlike anyone I've ever met, which makes me all the more attracted to him. But even if I'm successful in implementing my goal of uniting the three realms, I doubt there would ever come a time where I'd..." He trails off, appearing to collect his thoughts.

"At the end of the day, I have to consider who'd be fit to rule by my side, and even if I didn't have to abide by tradition, I just don't think he has it in him to be able to do it successfully." Well, this is interesting. I was under the impression that he'd marry Lucifer in a heartbeat if he could. He certainly acted that way in my timeline.

"You seem confused," Diavolo observes. "Is the relationship I have with Lucifer that much different where you come from?"

"In a word, yes." He sighs again.

"The biggest problem is the mark. Its influence is making him act increasingly subservient towards me, and I want my future partner to feel like they're equal to me. If I'm being stupid, I'd want someone to tell me that and help me change my behavior. That wouldn't be possible if I'm constantly surrounded by yes men.

"As it is, it's difficult to find objective people. They're either too afraid or too enamored to stand up to me. My father used that to his advantage. I won't make that same mistake."

"I see." I'm a bit surprised that he's being so open about all this. I mean, it's not like I'm going to tell anyone, not even when I get back home, but still. My Diavolo and I have never been able to get this close. We've had deep conversations, sure, but never about this.

"So, Solomon and Lucifer. Who's number three?" I find myself hesitating to answer. It's not that I don't want to; I'm simply too nervous about his potential reaction to be able to form words.

"It's okay, MC. Just move your head. Sound good?" I nod.

"Is it a member of royalty?" Nod.

"Is it someone from the House of Lords?" Shake.

"Is it one of their servants?" A confused shake.

"We generally treat them as part of the royal family," he explains. "After all, they help ensure that things run smoothly for us." Nod.

"Is it someone that I'd know?"

"Kind of?" Oh, so now my mouth decides to work. Diavolo tilts his head and studies me. A couple minutes later, he gets up from his chair and walks over to me. Leaning over me, he gently lifts my chin up so that I'm looking directly into his eyes.

"Is it me?" His voice is much huskier than it was before, making my heart begin racing. I'm afraid to tell him the truth, but I also know that he's going to see right through whatever lie I tell him.

Might as well be honest with him. It'd be better than the alternative.

"Yes." He smiles softly.

"Good."

Good?

Diavolo's lips touch mine, causing my brain to shut off momentarily. He's pleasantly warm. Makes me all tingly inside.

Even though the kiss doesn't last very long, I still find myself slightly out of breath when he pulls away.

"Strange," he whispers, taking a step back to give me space.

"What?"

"I thought that would have satisfied my curiosity, but I..." Is he getting nervous?

"You were curious about me?" He nods.

"After I first told you about my trial, I had a vision. It appeared as a brief flash of color at first, but when I was able to focus on it, it showed you and me sitting beside each other on thrones. Your behavior at the Kingsblood Crucible proved to me that you'd be more than capable of ruling alongside me, but then I began wondering how we'd even get to that point in the first place. If the House of Lords didn't like me allowing the seven brothers to live here, then in what world would they accept me marrying a human?"

"That hasn't stopped you from broaching the subject before."

"I figured as much, but I still wanted to know why."

"And?" Diavolo takes a deep breath.

"You taste ridiculously sweet. It's awoken something in me, and I find myself wanting more. In fact, it's making it increasingly harder to concentrate on anything else."

Oh. Is this how the others feel about me? It'd certainly explain some of their behavior towards me; I'm like a drug to them. Whether it's due to my powers, my ancestry, or something else entirely, I'm not sure.

But that's not really that important right now.

"Do you want me to enable you, or stop you?" I ask Diavolo.

"I...I don't know." A blush develops on his face, and he suddenly seems unable to look at me. I'm not used to seeing this side of the prince, but I can't say I mind it. It's rather adorable.

"Do you trust me enough to make the decision for you?" He nervously swallows before nodding his head, and I get up from my chair and stand in front of him. Standing on the tips of my toes makes me just tall enough for me to kiss Diavolo.

The next thing I know, I'm sitting in his lap as we practically devour each other. At least that's something that stays consistent across time and space.

I'm sure both of us are going to be littered with marks by the time we're done.

Taglist: @lost-in-time-wanderer, @fuzztacular, @dianedancer18, @sweetbrier2908, @flare-love, @completelyshatteredbrokenmschf, @thunderlightning351, @l3v1chan, @anxious-chick, @5mary5, @expressionless-fr, @tenkobitch, @interconnectedmatrix

[snooze-mode]

Crabcakes is autistic and you can't change my mind.

Eido has my heart and you will never make me hate her, so I'm bestowing upon her the highest honour I can give: The Autism headcanon. Please note that I'm autistic myself, and I see a LOT of myself in Eido, so these come from a place of love and personal experience. Some of these are based on canon info, whilst others are a bit more freeform.

Ramblings under the cut

Eido is, of course, extremely academically gifted, but she struggles with more social situations. It's why she often falls back on Old Eliksni social traditions during conversations with people she doesn't know very well or just met. This leads to her being overly formal until she really gets to know someone… For better or for worse.

E.g. How she was extremely polite and formal with Spider upon first meeting him, but has grown more willing to openly push back against him or be snarky as time goes on.

She has a bunch of sensory issues. Not massively so that they severely impact her ability to do things, but she's very particular about certain sounds, textures, tastes, etc.

She doesn't wear the standard Eliksni rebreather unit because she doesn't like the way it feels on her face. Over the years, she and Misraaks have experimented with custom rebreathers until they settled on the one she wears now, incorporated into soft cloth wrappings that cover the entire lower half of her face, rather than covering just the front of her mouth and mandibles. It looks a little strange and ramshackle, but it's what works for her.

She's sensitive in particular to smells, but she does her best not to comment on individual scent because it's considered rude in Eliksni culture.

She's fidgety and often ends up using the trinkets on her clothing or her bracelets as stimming implements when she needs to occupy her lower hands.

Whilst her main special interest is, of course, studying History (especially the tales of Old Riis from before the Whirlwind), Eido has a less known special interest in sewing and crafting.

She made the leather charm on the tonics capsule she gives the YW by hand, and did the embroidery on the front of her robes herself. She also enjoys spending time repairing or adding to her existing clothing.

Emotionally hypersensitive!!!

She gets very attached to things and struggles with letting things she loves go. Her robes made out of her old Hatchling swaddles, as she would not let them go - They bring her comfort. They're made out of old Awoken-made cloth - It was the first thing Misraaks could find after he took Eido in. Both Eido and Misraaks make sure to stock up on the cloth on the occasion that they're in the Reef, to ensure she has enough to repair or expand/replace old clothes she's grown out of.

This is an alternative take on a headcanon from JaxxCapta about her clothes being made from the same material as her Hatchling swaddles due to sensory issues, where I wanted to tie it into the feelings of sentimentality and attachment you can get with objects. (This is drawing from my own personal experience, I still have some things from when I was very young because I simply cannot bring myself to part with them!)

She takes the machine-spirit part of Eliksni religion very seriously as a result of her tendency to be sentimental over objects. E.g. How she's gendered the unreliable Shank (other Eliksni sources in lore don't seem to gender shanks the same way she does).

This sensitivity makes her really good with caring for Hatchlings, complimenting her role as a Scribe (and teacher) very well. She's able to empathise with even the silliest (to the outsider, at least) of Hatchling feelings well, and play off of them well and diffuse anger or upset before it becomes a major issue.

However, she can also be very sensitive to criticism. She's definitely gotten better at handling it over the years (and lord does she need it with Variks as her mentor now), but criticism from Misraaks about her approach to handling the hunt for the Relics of Nezarec definitely knocked her confidence and strained her relationship with him, even before Eramis spilled his secrets to her.

On Eramis: She's so patient with Eramis despite her obvious issues due to her ability to empathise so strongly. Others view it as naivety, but Eido understands that Eramis is a deeply troubled individual who has had her grief and trauma taken advantage of by the Witness. The fact others don't get it is endlessly frustrating to her. (This is basically canon info, I'm just tying this into her emotional hypersensitivity.)

[alanaartdream]

Back from Australian 🇦🇺 Sydney blue mountains 🏔️ gardens and well blue mountains fun times right as spring daylight savings has started soo I am beat but had a great day

Also did some more Fairy Timmy with the nicktoons drawings as well as just drawing Timmy drawings

Also a little mystery skulls Arthur kingsman (or is it kingsmen?) looking how tried I feel because I know that man has lost a lot of sleep trying to figure out what happened to his best friend Lewis

Someone help that poor man get some rest my goodness

Now

Every time it comes to Timmy Turner I’m starting to see some fairly odd parents and nicktoons unite fans seem to truly misunderstand what it is Timmy goes through back in his own universe or why he has Wanda & Cosmo in the frist place because like in Timmy’s theme song no one understands him (besides Wanda and cosmo) because Timmy is a friendly kid he just has rather neglectful forgetful (also very crazy) parents a abusing babysitter who cares more about getting money for herself and causing harm to others; a crazy lunatic Teacher who wants fairies magic to rule over the world and just loves to fail his students so he can find ways to get fairies off them (( like in today’s society no one would put up with having a teacher like cocker now??))

He’s the cindaralla in his life because again in theme song for him having fairy odd parents *mum & dad and Vicky always giving him commands*

He’s not given the care a child should so Wanda and Cosmo have to fill in the role his own parents and a lot of the adults in his life are failing to do so

Heck Jimmy got to experience what it’s like to be Timmy and he was horrified by it so he was a little bit nicer to Timmy after that; he doesn’t fully know the details like he just believes Wanda & Cosmo are programs and as much as Timmy would like to correct him he knows if he does he’ll lose the only ones who truly care for him like family (witch is Wanda and Cosmo and baby poof/peri later on) so he cannot correct him as much as he wants to

2 things I’m finding it interesting annoying with some people is 1 they just think Timmy’s some awful brat who doesn’t deserve Wanda and Cosmo when that’s REALLY NOT the case and 2 they think the relationship he has with Jimmy is toxic because in Jimmy Timmy power hour they learn about each other a bit and learn to get along and even help each other to stop each other’s villains and become friends witch is what lead into the nicktoons unite games so their relationship is anything BUT toxic I mean they’re both kids who are still learning and growing as most children need to do

Both got to deal with bullying in their worlds only difference is Jimmy has supportive understanding parents were as Timmy doesn’t

Also if you’re going to say a pair of characters have a toxic relationship it be Jimmy

And Cindy because they bully each other a lot (mostly because Cindy’s jealous she’s not the smartest one in her school and Jimmy kinda tells her girls cannot be scientists/ smart to return her bullying witch isn’t the most mature response to that honestly but he’s a kid and creators of his show/movie said he’ll grow outta that mentality as a teenager/ adult also hopefully Cindy will learn to grow out of her jealousy of not being the smartest student in the school I hope) but the way they are with each other is awful at times

Compared to them Timmy and Jimmy get along quite well heck I feel like Timmy may be the one to mature before those two and probably be the one to ground the both of them down and get them to be nicer to each other like he had to do for Aj & Chester and a few times he had to do that for Wanda and Cosmo as well

Because in his world half the time Timmy has to remind his own birth parents to be nice to each other or help each other; Wanda and Cosmo are there so Timmy still has a childhood because the adults of his world sure as heck not giving it to him

(( heck there’s episode of how sweet innocent and well behaved Timmy was BEFORE Vicky came into his life as his abusing babysitter))

In my Fairy Timmy with the nicktoons au Jimmy has to face the reality that ghosts and fairies are real now because in the games he didn’t think they were real but Danny finding it safe now to admit he’s half ghost being as in the end of his show’s run his parents found out but excepted him as he was being as he’s their kid and nothing gonna change that for them so he’s more free to be himself and change between ghost to human whenever he needs to fight ghosts

Although Mr super smart kid cannot see ghosts and fairies as real even though they’re right there in front of him and he’s met a talking sea sponge

Danny in my Au likes to rub that bit of information to Danny sometimes like a older brother/ sister would being as in the games he acts like the older brother of the group

Also find it sad after all this time Some nicktoons unite fan neglect that Sam Trucker even SpongeBob’s friends pratrik star and Sammy squirrel get to join the team in the nicktoons unite games as well you could have some real fun with them as well

Kinda makes one miss the game being as some nice lore was starting to be build up around them (you could’ve make a movie based on how much lore you can get out of them honestly)

[redux-iterum]

One of the things I love about this redux is that you take into consideration how bad an idea forcing people to do stuff they don’t wanna do is.

Think about it. If a seer hates their job then not only are they going to be miserable, but the people around them are too. Force one person to be utterly miserable in a way their family doesn’t approve of and suddenly its also the business of friends of the family and then that can spiral out real easy.

Forcing cats to have kits will lead to dead kittens. Forcing cats to do a job they don’t wanna do means the job won’t get done properly. The negative effects of that kind of pressure WILL build tension in the community and a community as small and insular as a clan is will struggle not to come apart under the strain.

The original clans struggled to feel like a community at all, let alone a tightly-knit, closed-off, and small one. But here, I can actually see how these cats are able to survive at all. Community is the name of the game here—the ability to remain a cohesive and efficient unit even in times of stress is and has been what determines if a group of people live or die. Here, especially, trust and care are paramount.

If these cats do not want to make this work then they are just as dead as if they starved to death. And it’s really nice to have an author that takes that part seriously, because even if it’s supposedly ‘less cool’ there is a reason soft power is still called power. Community matters! People who have their agency stepped upon WILL fuck your day up and make it your problem, and if that happens enough times then somebody’s going to wise up enough to have some common sense!

Repeatedly making people take up med cat duties is repetitive and lazy. It’s also just…absolutely, obviously counterproductive. It feels like the Erins don’t take them or their queens seriously. Which in the originals ends up being ‘the pregnant women that are probably close family to you have no sway or relevance to anything ever outside of motherhood which is NOT the future of your whole community and is instead A STUPID WASTE OF TIME’ and ‘the doctors we somehow have don’t matter even though we live in a community where BATTLE is referenced in our main code of law.’

Like. It’s bad? It’s misogynistic and wrong but it’s also just bad worldbuilding. There is no way a community of 30 people can manage to both 1) not highly value their pregnant people AND 2) last more than a generation AND 3) not piss off both those pregnant people and their family who can totally realistically make up a full 1/6 of your total community. There is no way a bunch of battle cats would, like, not value hypothetical doctors they have.

Anyways. All of this was a ramble but mostly just—you thought this through and I love that a lot. Like, this manages to feel like an actual society, and that is hard hard hard to accomplish when societies are made up of so many moving pieces which sometimes work against each other at random. So, thank you for writing! And rewriting! Because this is one of the best things in the whole wide world and my favorite warriors cats thing ever.

Thank you very much for this ask, my man! Well thought-out and a very interesting discussion to springboard off of.

The canon Clans always felt like they had...how to word it... "misplaced power", if that makes sense. It was, of course, in service of the plot, but that involved things like an entire Clan who hates their leader just obeying him because We Have To, No Matter How Evil Or Incompetent He Is. Mentors could bully their apprentices freely because the leader, deputy and family of the apprentice wouldn't step up and punish the mentor. Deputy mollies lose all power the instant they get pregnant, even though tom deputies can have as many families as they want and still remain in their position, and no one says anything about how unfair this is.

There's a lack of thought towards how powerful a community really can be, or how even one individual can make change by standing strong and refusing orders. It comes with this weird stupidity everyone gains when a villain needs to progress with their plans - no one asks questions about the power structure, or defends anybody for longer than a couple lines - but, moreover, it comes with a lack of bonds between characters. Even siblings don't speak up for each other, because they're not close or don't express their familial love. There's just a rigid structure that the plot and lore adheres to without examining how easily this structure can fall apart. Unless we need it to fall apart for whatever storyline we have this arc, and then it'll be back in place by the end of things, so it's fine.

[chaotic-archaeologist]

long time follower, first time asker... i really need some wisdom or encouragement right now. i'm in my 30s and have been working on a bachelor's degree for years, in fits and starts, with a lot of setbacks. (finally landed on history with religious studies minor, but i used to study anthropology as well.) the thing is, i recently watched a guest lecture by a wonderful religious scholar (dr. francesca stavrakopoulou) and she was so... inspiring? erudite? smart? she was incredible to listen to, she seemed so in touch with her field and was able to draw amazing connections and answer questions with references to multiple religions and languages off the top of her head, was able to recommend peers of hers by name for other specialities, it was really inspiring.

but as awesome as she was, after the lecture was finished i was a little devastated because i feel like i will never be able to achieve that level of ease and expertise no matter how much i study. i feel like a fraud, i feel like my adhd is holding me back and turning my brain into swiss cheese. it's already taking me so much longer to get a bachelor's than it should and i'm painfully aware you have to have a PhD to really work as a historian; i feel like i'm so far behind that i'll never catch up and that as i get older i'll just get worse at learning... is this imposter syndrome? am i just struggling with a plateau and need to push harder to reach the next level? am i just not cut out for academia? have other academics also struggled with this? what do i do? :( i love this field more than anything, i have wanted to study people and history since i was in high school. i don't even know what i would do with my life if not this, but i just don't know if i'm completely out of my league and living in a fantasy land or if having a career as a historian is really still possible...

You know what, I'm really glad you asked this question.

I had a very similar experience recently, where I went to an academic talk that was so well done it left me thinking well shit, I'll never be able to do something like that. But you know what? I really do think that's the imposter syndrome talking.

I'm a fan of the four stages of learning. Unconscious incompetence, conscious incompetence, conscious competence, and unconscious competence.

You and I, as upper level students, are maybe somewhere on the cusp of conscious incompetence and conscious competence, which is not an especially comfortable place to be. We're aware of how much we don't know, and when we do things, we have to try really hard to be good at them.

The talks we both watched were given by people at the level of unconscious competence. And you know how they got to that level? By doing a PhD and spending a really long time immersed in the literature. They started their learning journeys earlier, and so they know more than we do right now. Which is normal!!! At this point in our careers, we are not expected to be able to do work like this, and there's a reason for that—we're not ready yet. But with time, we will get there.

(Psst, you know what the biggest prerequisite for giving a talk like that is? It's passion and a genuine interest in your field. You can't learn that, or force it if it's not there. And it sounds like you've got it covered.)

So now I'd like to address your fears of being too old. I totally understand—ageism is real, and it's especially hard in college settings where everyone around you tends to be 1) much younger, and 2) on the high school -> college track. Not being on that track is not a moral failing. The higher education system in the United States is very hostile to anyone who doesn't perfectly fit into the university's machinery. That is a problem with academia, not with you.

I know plenty of nontraditional students who have gotten their degrees at varying ages. When they give you your diploma, it won't have your age on it or how long it took you to get your degree. What matters is that you've earned it, not when. Better now than never. Don't give up.

I would like you to try to do on thing for me: look back through your life and make a list of all the moments where you had an "aha" moment. When you realized this was something you wanted to do for the rest of your life. When you did something and felt good about it. And I do really mean write! it! down! Keep this list (and add to it) so you can look back at it. I pay attention to stuff like this when I write in my journal so I can remind myself during low moments.

Congratulations, it sounds like you're passionate about something enough to pursue it doggedly, even when things are difficult! That's something special that not everyone gets to have. I think you owe it to yourself to do your very best to pursue your dream.

-Reid

[ourfatherwhoartinhell]

Silent Hearts // [Part III]

Pairing | Cowbell x reader

Word count | 3.1k

⚠️ Warnings | Canon divergence, f!reader, Y/N is used. Should be okay otherwise? Nothing really happens in this one, you just have a chat with Mountain.

Chapter Summary: It's your turn to struggle with complicated feelings. You turn to Mountain to find some closure and understanding, but he opens your eyes to something completely different about this mystery ghoul than you ever could have imagined...

A/N: This one is less intense but gives y'all some more background on Felix. I wonder what will happen when you finally see him again... stay tuned for the next one~ xoxo

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Once you got back to your dorm that night, you had a chance to finally process what just happened as you laid out on your bed; the group of Brothers who were hellbent on terrorizing you, the strange ghoul that seemingly came out of nowhere to your rescue. 

Where did those Siblings run off to anyway?

This was all feeling so overwhelming and strange. You had a very limited knowledge of the ghouls and their species in general. You really only talked to Mountain, who was very intimidating at first due to his enormous size, but you two could talk about plants and fauna for hours. Quickly it became apparent he was quite soft spoken and very respectful. He never made any sudden moves and was generally very calm. Nothing like what you had imagined ghouls would be. He taught you a lot about greenery but almost nothing about him or his kind. You never wanted to push either, knowing that the Clergy always said to leave ghouls alone and to stay out of their way. 

They were workhorses and nothing more in the eyes of the Clergy and it made you sick. From your few interactions with Mountain, you knew they were capable of so much more. They were intelligent and emotionally complex creatures who had so much to teach us. They all seemed overall pretty content and happy with their roles though, so who were you to try and understand the intricacies of human/ghoul relations? That was a job for the Liaison Unit.

Those were siblings specifically chosen to help keep the peace between our very different species and for the most part, they do a very good job. The members of the ‘Human-Ghoul Liaison Unit’ know the ghouls very well, they help create rules in the best interest of both parties to keep everyone safe. They also are in charge of educating the new members of the Ministry on our otherworldly counterparts.

You had heard there were talks of a ‘Unified Security Division’ in the works too; a joint-species task force to monitor, protect, and prevent Ministry members from both human and ghoul related incidents. You thought it was a great idea! Humans and ghouls working together as a team, utilizing both of our unique characteristics and skills for the greater good of the Ministry.

Would probably never happen though. That would give the ghouls too much authority, the Clergy would finally have to accept they were a higher life form.

The next morning you walked out to the greenhouse to see if the only ghoul you knew would be able to give you some answers on who you met last night.

You waved hello to a few Sisters on your way down the steps exiting the Ministry. You weren’t really sure how you were going to even start, or what to even say. Did Mountain even know who this ghoul was? He seemed to have been out there a while, maybe they never spoke?

“You seem terribly lost in thought.” Mountain's warm voice came from low beside you.

“Mountain!” You shouted, a hand gripping your chest. “Belial, don’t scare me like that!” You had just about jumped out of your skin, not realizing how detached from reality you were in that moment. Mountain was crouched between rows of tomato vines so it was no wonder you didn’t see him, even if he was gigantic.

“Sorry, sorry.” He laughs and stands to his full height. “Anything I can help with?”

You let out a heavy sigh, the thoughts of yesterday returning with a vengeance. “Actually yeah. I hope you can. I came out here to ask you some questions about… ghouls?”

Mountain’s confused expression was noticeable even through his mask, his head tilt said more than words ever could. “Why are you suddenly interested in ghouls?”

You looked down to where your feet squished the well-kept grass. “I’m not! I mean– yes, I am.” You took a breath. “Something happened.”

Mountain gestured to walk with him so he could sit with you and chat properly. There was a large octagonal gazebo just a few feet from where you were standing. He stepped over the row of tomatoes with ease and guided you towards it.

The gazebo was a perfect addition to the garden if you did say so yourself. It was wood but painted black. The hanging candles that lined the outside were brushed silver which must’ve looked picturesque at night. There were 4 steps up to the main platform, lined with an iron railing. The thick pillars each had a weeping angel attached that faced outwards, water droplets from the morning rain made them cry over the flowers below.

Once the two of you got up to the main platform, there was a black deck couch directly in front, decorated with blood red cushions and golden accent pillows. In front of the couch was a rounded glass coffee table with matching chairs on either side. There were lush green plants that sat on either side of the large couch to bring some colour. It was such a nice spot, you didn’t know why you haven’t come out here more. It was peaceful. Exactly what you needed white you talked through your troubled thoughts.

With a soft, gentle hand on your back, Mountain offered for you to take a seat on the couch. You realized the cushions were just as plush as they looked when you eventually sat, taking a moment to just sit and take in the smells of the nature around you.

Mountain stood awkwardly by the other end of the couch with his hands clasped behind his back before you noticed he hadn’t sat down.

“You can sit beside me, I’ll allow it.” You joked and patted the middle cushion.

Mountain simply nodded and took a seat at the opposite end. 

“I didn’t want you to feel uncomfortable.”

 It was a full sized couch so there was plenty of room, but of course he was a gentleman. Gentle-ghoul? Whatever you were supposed to say. Mountain was always so polite and considerate.

“Mountain, you are the only ghoul around here that hasn’t made me feel uncomfortable or awkward.” You smiled, knowing that every word you said was completely true.

Being a ghoul of few words he just hummed in understanding and nodded. “So, what did you want to know about ghouls? You… didn’t get hurt by one, did you?”

His eyes flicked to yours, gauging your reaction. He knew that his kind could be a little out of control and unpredictable by nature. He’d be lying if he didn’t admit you were slowly becoming a soft spot for him. So if one of his packmates did anything to harm you…

“Oh! No, nothing like that.” Your hands waved in front of you, trying to brush away any thoughts that you had been hurt. You noticed how Mountain had already begun looking with a slight hint of worry for any injuries he must’ve missed when you had been walking together.

He let out a sigh of relief when he realized that wasn’t the case and unclenched his glamoured hands. “That’s good. Really good.”

A faint look of worry crossed your face as you saw Mountain relax. Were ghouls really so dangerous that they just attack Siblings out of nowhere? Were you safe with Mountain sitting 2 feet away from you on the other end of the couch? Questions started to stir but you forced them down. Mountain has never once made you feel afraid, or that he was capable of anything but kindness. Sometimes, you'd admit, you tended to forget he was a ghoul and not just a Sibling in a mask.

“I was up at the cemetery last night and those Brothers came to bother me again,” you started.

Mountain let out a low, very annoyed grumble. He knew who you were talking about, they had been bothering you for a little while, sometimes even when he was around. They thought they were invincible within the walls of the Ministry, that their faith would protect them from any harm.

“What did they want this time?”

“I’ve never seen them in the cemetery before so I don’t even know how they knew to find me there, but anyways. I was just finishing up placing the last of the tulips - which were very pretty by the way, thank you.” You smiled, remembering how nice they looked at the base of the headstones. The colours were perfect for this time of year.

“I thought you’d enjoy those.” Mountain said softly, returning with his own smile knowing he was already planning which ones to give you next week.

“Anyway, they came up and were a lot more forward than usual. Getting brave I guess,” you recalled, voice lowering as you continued. “I thought they were going to actually try something this time so I warned them, like you said to, but I guess I must’ve closed my eyes because by the time I opened them, they were gone. Just vanished.”

Mountain nodded in intrigue as he followed along, moving to face more towards you as he let you continue.

“Then from over the hill I see this half glamoured ghoul, I think? At first I thought he was you because he was so tall.” You explained, watching Mountain's eyes squint through the mask, trying to imagine who it could’ve been way out there. “He was covered in blood so I offered to clean him up a bit, but he was so strange.”

Mountain's eyes flashed an angry green as he suddenly got a good idea of who you had run into, his expression twisting into a glare as he took a frustrated breath. “This, ghoul. What did he look like, did he say anything to you?”

“He was blind, that I remember for sure. He had white smoke like a mask over his eyes, said he lived in the woods or something? He was kind of off-putting at first if I’m being honest–”

You didn’t even get to finish your sentence before Mountain let out a very displeased growl. “Don’t go back to the cemetery.”

You were unexpectedly taken aback, eyes wide with shock at Mountain's sudden shift in demeanour. This wasn’t like him, normally he was very soft-spoken.

“What? Why?” You asked nervously. “Mountain, what happened?”

“I don’t want you going back there now he knows your scent.” He said very abruptly, looking around like the two of you were suddenly being watched.

Your breath hitched, Mountain’s anxious body language radiating danger. If one of the largest ghouls in the Abbey was afraid, you were absolutely terrified.

“My scent? What’s going on? Who was that? Who are you so afraid of?” You asked hurriedly, starting to breathe heavy.

“Not afraid.” He said in almost a whisper, turning back to look at you. “Angry. He’s not allowed to come anywhere near members of the Ministry, especially the Siblings.”

“Who is he, Mountain?” You asked sternly, starting to get tired of his cryptic secrets.

“A very, very distant cousin.”

Now it made sense why the strange ghoul was so tall, they were related.

“Felix is your cousin?” You questioned, trying to make sense of it all.

“He told you his name?”

Mountain’s surprise made your brow furrow. “Uh– yeah. Why? Is he not allowed to do that either?”

The earth ghoul shook his head. “No, that was never part of the agreement. Plus ghouls take great pride in their name, they were given to us by the Dark One himself.” Mountain let out a pained yet amused huff. “He’s never told anyone his real name before.”

It was your turn to act surprised. Never? You knew you didn’t know that much about the ghouls but this was beyond what you imagined.

“What does that mean? Is he going to hunt me for sport now? Should I be afraid?” You asked.

Mountain took a breath. “I don’t know, Y/N. I really don’t. All I can say is avoid him at all costs, he’s not a ghoul you want to know.” He looked at you with a serious expression. “He’s dangerous.”

“Dangerous?” You echoed.

Suddenly the entire night snapped together like a puzzle. The blood, the vanishing Brothers. He had killed them. Why didn’t you realize that before?! You literally helped clean blood off a killer, standing inches away from him.

Your body shook involuntarily as you realized how close you stood to death himself.

“He didn’t seem that bad…” you trailed off in a horrified whisper, your fingers nervously brushing over your drying lips.

“He’s out there for a reason.” Mountain said, his voice slowly returning to his more comforting tone. “Just promise me you won’t go looking for him? If you want to continue going to the cemetery I can’t stop you, but at least bring me along… so I can protect you.” He trailed off quietly at the end, now speaking with a different kind of nervousness.

Unfortunately for Mountain, you hardly paid attention to anything he said. Your mind still reeling with thoughts of Felix. You lowered a hand to your chest, trying to steady your racing heart when you suddenly looked up at Mountain. 

“He couldn’t hear my heartbeat.”

Mountain's head tilted much like his cousins did as he looked at you in confusion. “What do you mean? Not at all?”

You shook your head. “He said it was quiet. Told me that normally he could hear everyones but he couldn’t hear mine.”

Mountain slowly got up to pace around the side of the gazebo, deep in thought. “What else happened?”

You looked at the ground, trying to remember any important details. “He said he was given a choice? To live in the catacombs or the woods, that’s why he was out there. When I told him he was covered in blood he said that was common? I thought he meant because ghouls have to hunt, not because he had just killed three people.”

“He lied.” Mountain said abruptly. “We can eat human food just fine, but he can’t. Ever since he was summoned he was never able to eat anything on the surface, so he started eating like we do in the Pit.”

“Which means?”

“Blood, Y/N. Up here Felix needs blood to survive or he dies.” Mountain stopped pacing and gripped the back of the chair in front of him, his claws peaking through in flickers as his emotions started tearing through his concentration. 

“The Clergy thought it was strange but allowed him to hunt in the forest once a month, he ate raw the rest of the time but never in the dining hall with the rest of us. They had a special room in the kitchen where they threw him slabs of meat like a feral dog.” Mountain hung his head remembering how poorly he was treated. “Normally the longer we’re up here, the less of our demonic nature hangs around, we become “domesticated”, as Copia now likes to say. I guess because he was still hunting, his instincts were kept razor sharp. Deadly.”

You couldn’t help the way your mouth hung open as you took in everything you were hearing. This couldn’t have been the same ghoul that stopped you from falling on your ass when you slipped, or the ghoul that joked and teased. The ghoul that looked like a kicked puppy so starved for affection that he all but begged you to stay.

“I don’t know what his lack of ability to hear your heart means, but it can’t be anything good. He uses it to hunt and track his prey, amongst his other abilities. He’s not like the rest of us, Y/N. He never will be. He’s too far gone.”

“You said he knows my scent now too,” your voice laced with worry.

“Normally that’s not an issue, I got to know yours as soon as we met. It just happens,” Mountain explains. “Ghouls tend to use scent for a lot of things, it’s like a silent language.”

You nodded. “But why can’t he live in the Abbey? You said he did before?”

Mountain tensed once again as he grumbled. “He will have to tell you that, we don’t like to speak of it.”

Sensing that was still a sore topic you dropped it, watching Mountain make his way back over to the couch and sit back down. He rested his elbows on his knees as he leaned in towards you. You could see the intense look in his moss coloured eyes like he was silently pleading with you through the slits in his mask. 

“I’m serious, Y/N. Promise me you wont go back on your own. I don’t want to see you get hurt.”

You admired how protective he was. It was comforting to know that if anything happened, Mountain would be there. But there was still something clawing at the back of your mind, like a string begging to be unravelled that was pulling you back to Felix.

“I promise.” You smiled.

“Good. Now, what were you thinking for next week’s arrangements? I’ve got some roses just about ready–”

You nodded along mindlessly as you discussed the next batch of flowers, chipping in a few words now and again but you were far, far away. Talking about it only brought you right back, and Mountain failed to notice your 100 yard stare once he got talking about his new batch of hydrangeas.

You couldn’t help but get lost in your memories. The invisible string pulling you right back to him. The way he looked at you, the fanged grin that made your heart skip in excitement and curiosity. Remembering the way his tail felt, pressed against your back as he pulled you closer. You could almost swear you still felt it rubbing gently along your spine, or his breath along your ear whispering, ‘What's the matter, Kitten?’

You shivered at the phantom touches which earned an odd look from Mountain before he continued explaining some different colour combinations for next week. You told yourself it was just your mind playing tricks, he wasn’t really here. You were safe, you were with Mountain. Yet, there was so much about him your soul still craved to understand. A feeling that was so foreign. You felt betrayed by your own mind after everything you learnt. You were supposed to be afraid and never want to leave the safety of the Abbey ever again.

But as much as you wanted to uphold your promise to Mountain, you had those cemetery eyes…

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