#it is a perfect cocktail
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thinking about how mcr has like 15 million monthly listeners but i have been in the top .5-1% for the past two consecutive years...this is what mental illness and growing up catholic does to a person
#not to mention being weird and gay#it is a perfect cocktail#personal#mcr#only reason i was not in their top listeners before this was because i didn't really start using spotify until 2019#and my top artist that year was regrettably Brand New....#gun to my head couldn't tell you who it was in 2020 though#that was a weird year for everyone anyway i don't really need to remember
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i'm drunk off two lavender martinis what the fuck do you MEAN dan and phil went on a step by step recreation of their japan trip as a part of a HONEYMOON episode for their sims. be so fr rn be so serious please. dan howell you have 4 minutes to respond . phil, keep it up babygirl. lavender martini recipe in the tags
#2 oz vanilla vodka (i used pearl bc its cheap and good)#1 oz lemon juice#1 oz lavender syrup (1 part sugar 1 part 1 water in a sauce pan#healthy coating of EDIBLE!!!! lavender to cover the top#bring to boil then reduce to a simmer for 5 mins#take off heat and let that shit steep for a bit#longer the better#i say 25 mins at the LEAST for a strong flavor#15 mins will do the job tho probs#filter out the lavender w a siv#add 3 drops each of blue/red food dye to make it purple if u want#garnish w a lemon#i bartend at a restaurant and this is one of our signature cocktails#i was iffy about lavender cocktails/lattes n shit before#but this drink changed me. the perfect balance of lavender notes and sweet/citrus#dan and phil#daniel howell#phil lester#amazingphil#dan and phil games#dnp#dnpgames#dipnpip#danisnotonfire#do people still use that tag#whatever. its there#danandphilgames#<3#i love them so much#they are my birth mothers
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Shadowhunters 1x12 Malec
#shadowhunters#shadowhuntersedit#shedit#magnus bane#clary fray#s1#1.12#mine#giffing this in honor of recently having had this exact conversation with my colleague#well not exact tbf he wanted gin not cocktails#but me going ''it's nine??'' and him going ''it's happy hour somewhere'' was flashback worthy enough#me at work: 400kb for a gif??? isn't that a bit much??#me making gifs for tumblr dot org: oh 9.9 mb perfect#funnily enough that work convo happens with the same colleague#anyway!!! i couldn't remember what font i'd use for these kind of gifs for the life of me so. maybe it was this. maybe it wasn't.#200
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Went to a place today that had two cocktails, one called Yuri and the other called Yaoi. 👍
(If you're curious, I did screenshot the menu so i can list the ingredients
Yaoi - passion fruit mojito: spearmint, passion fruit, rum and sparkling water
Yuri - watermelon mojito: spearmint, watermelon juice, rum and sparkling water)
YOOO... OKAY GOT IT. i gotta try these asap. i need yuri and yaoi cocktails I NEEEEEED
#asks!#anon i hope youre proud of the fact that this ask alone is enough to convince me to look for and buy#the ingredients during the week#listen... thats really funny. and also i wanna try more cocktails#and like yaoi and yuri cocktails sound perfect for me#ive never even had a mojito KEKW#alcohol
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More & NSFW on X(Twitter)
#ai#ai art#ai image#ai generated#ai girl#girls#lingerie#bar#drinking#cocktails#beautiful girl#perfect body#aidigitalfun
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water, running down my face / water, running different ways water, like a billion waves / water, just a tear in space. ✧
for my ffxiv oc, eden mercure. prior to enw, he was not a little predisposed to world-shattering grief and causing problems bc of his weary heart. SO, when i got to elpis, it wasn't long before i decided that he was a hermes shard rather than one of azem. it's just too perfect a story.. anyway, please enjoy my love letter to him before dawntrail! and go listen to this song, it's so good
#ffxiv#hermes#warrior of light#ffxiv art#i thought about him crying stars and have been a man possessed for 48 hours.#my ocs#breezyarts#he definitely had some like. mildly fandaniel-esque qualities too so he's really the perfect cocktail between the hermes>amon>etc pipeline#it was so funny to me. and also i cry abt it forever#me when his eyes were the same color as the fandaniel stone azem gets: I have died. badly.#but it makes me happy to have a hermes shard who lives on and recovers when his canon fate is not so relieving. so ya :)#this piece is mostly about the conflict of self love and madness that comes with realizing where your heart comes from#and all the pain tethered to an eternity of course. he loves the stars but i wanted to draw him crushing one too. you understand#fandaniel#ocs#ch: eden mercure
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hey genuine PSA, if you take any kind of psychiatric meds dont take mucinex/mucinex DM without checking for drug interactions first. when taken with SSRIs/MAOIs it can cause serotonin syndrome (source) which while rare IS potentially deadly. stay safe!
drug interactions checker
#mm says stuff#for some reason no doctor ive ever seen has told me about this#despite the fact that im on like. the perfect cocktail of meds for serotonin syndrome#thanks besties
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imagine the whitest cis gay guy ever. mhm. yup. thats the guy. yeah so he thinks t4t means twink for twink
#he is in his thirties#he wears little white shorts and striped short sleeve button downs#sunglasses are an essential#basically who youre picturing is a ken doll with some pink vodka cocktail#when his nephew tells him hes trans he is blandly supportive#he is perfect with making the pronoun and name switch#and it the first one to support him in any form medical transition#but he has told this nephew three times that he doesnt really get it#like i support you obviously but like.. isnt it really hard?#hes turning into a whole ass oc#jesus#if you made it this far we should like get married i think#anyway this is based on the ciswhitegay guys at the trans march#who very clearly misread the vibes of the event#and are incredibly drunk#<not really in an offputting way#but like to me the trans march is… its not a pride parade#and also theres a 21+ party after get drunk there#like this is a liiiittle bit more protest-based#but i am also somewhat of a rigid freak#rambles#winter stfu#.
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on svetlana’s independence, responsibility, etc.
svetlana having grown up in an environment where she was severely and cruelly punished for something as small as forgetting to bathe her grandmother’s dog and then being trafficked into a country where she had no family and was forced to look out for herself meant that she was never afforded the luxury of making mistakes or being irresponsible. she couldn’t just sit back and decide that she wasn’t feeling up for shouldering any burdens on a given day. she couldn’t take the day off from being an adult, even when she wasn’t yet one. she had to be Alert and Prepared all of the time. being forgetful or tired or lazy wasn’t an option. making any slip, no matter how small, was too costly— if it didn’t result in punishment, it jeopardized her survival, or both.
it’s why, by the time that we meet her, even when her life is more settled and she no longer has to live in survival mode 24/7, she’s unable to turn it off. it’s why she’s hyper-independent and doesn’t know how to ask for help and feels like she has to do it All. it’s why she gets frustrated when she’s interrupted, questioned, or not trusted to be able to handle things. it’s why she’s so demanding of herself and doesn’t understand how others can be so careless. it’s why she takes on so many responsibilities without being asked. when i say that svetlana has severe anxiety, this is what i am referring to.
she doesn’t know how to rest and she doesn’t feel that she can delegate to the people around her because the people around her aren’t as attentive or as competent as she is. and when those same people fail to appreciate everything that she does for them, she feels hurt. she was losing sleep pouring over the alibi books while kev and v got a good night’s rest— she did this without complaint and without owning any percentage of the bar at the time. she doesn’t ask for help, and, because it seems as though she has everything under control, she isn’t offered it. so she never gets it.
this also explains the mentality she has wherein she expects other people to trust her completely. when kev and v question her she takes it personally because she interprets their uncertainty as a failure on her part to have measured up. the way she sees it, her actions should speak for themselves and serve as reassurance that she is capable and has it all under control. in doubting her abilities, they are doubting her. and has she not done everything that she possibly could to warrant their confidence? why are they so worried that she’ll let them down? it’s a huge insecurity for her and a source of stress, and when you remember the high standards to which she was held as a small child, it’s not difficult to understand why.
svetlana feels the need to prove herself when it comes to the people she loves, so being questioned by them makes her feel like she hasn’t. and because she doesn’t understand why she hasn’t, she becomes irritable. this is not a sustainable way to live and, sooner or later, she would reach a breaking point. we start to see the cracks in s8, but then she’s hastily written out of the series. rest assured, though, that in due time the burnout would catch up with her— and, as soon as it did, her trauma would follow. because the only reason that she was able to outrun it for so long was that she didn’t have the time to consider it when she was focused on meeting basic needs while living in survival mode.
#svetlana was overworked and overwhelmed but underappreciated#the perfect ingredients for an emotional molotov cocktail#shameless#svetlana yevgenivna#svetlana milkovich#svetlana fisher#veronica fisher#kevin ball#shameless text#shameless meta
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all i know is, kento nanami would never
#˓ 🍸 ᭡ gimme a cocktail ◞#god saw the world full of boys and made kento nanami#he’s perfect#and if you hate him.. i don’t trust you#or your taste level#nanami kento#kento nanami
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Anyone else out here haunted by the unknowns of recovery?
#got a doctor's appointment tomorrow#bout going back on some kind of antidepressant/anti anxiety meds#bc i NEED to. like. the anxiety in particular is really bad and it's stopping me doing Most things#but my brain may be a shitty place to live rn but i kind of know how it works#and i have things i can semi rely on to cheer me up and things i know i can still do#what if the funky new chemical cocktail idk. makes me lose interest in writing?#thay would suck!! ! i just rediscovered it!!!#but i also can't put getting better on hold just bc I've found a bit of a creative groove that i wanna hang on to yknow?#idk. obviously i hope that being on meds that work will make me MORE creative not less#bc maybe I'll be less anxious about everything being perfect and less anxious sbout putting it out there#but it's just that fear i guess of to tackle the unhelpful parts of your brain sometimes the parts you like get caught in the crossfire#i hope I'll become MORE myself not less#but I've been unmedicated for a while now#and my brain isn't a fun place to be but i understand it#idk what's gonna happen in the next few weeks#i hope it's good#mr. bees speaks
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kit i'm so curious about your writing process, as someone who writes fanfic too it's amazing how much you write tbh, do you write on your phone or your computer? I'm pretty old school and write in paper idk why lmao
For the most part I write on my laptop and using Google docs (which has many many cons but the pros at this point still outweigh the Google doc cons) (the pros are mostly related to convenience and being able to edit offline and document syncing when online access comes back but also the ability to share a single link with the internet has been game changing tbh)
In situations where I have a lot of dead time but I don’t want to pull out my laptop, I’ve written on my phone (airplanes, at work between customers/tasks, in long car drives where I’m not driving) on either the Google docs app or on my notes app and copied it over to the main document later
I also come up with a lot of dialogue or action sequencing while I’m outside on walks that I just write down when I get back home - but rehearsing the scene and the dialogue in my head many times really helps it stick and makes writing it down go quickly. sometimes I feel like a director yelling “cut” and resetting the scene in my head, subtracting lines and then going “action!” 😂
I think mainly I’m just a pretty quick writer though if I have a sudden intense burst of creativity or passion for a project/chapter! and if I have a passion for the project, I’m more likely to find ways to write it even when real life gets busy or when I have obligations to attend to (i.e., I wrote the majority of the hot air balloonest anakin fic waiting for a train twice, and I wrote the majority of the first chapter of the hunger games au on a plane in a middle seat)
#asks#my ideal writing spot is probably by myself with coffee in the mornings#on a porch outside#my ideal answering tumblr asks spot is poolside with a cocktail#the answering asks one is unfortunately#harder to achieve#I think the first summer I had my sw tumblr blog I had access to a hot tub#that was great I want that back it was the perfect asks answering environment
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🪩 🪩 🪩
💖 💖 💖
🍾 🍾 🍾
#flashing#deliver me from being perfect and complete [queue]#you dont ask questions about project mayhem [boards]#pouring#drinks#alcohol#cocktails#ravecore#scene#fashion#clothes#clothing#skirts#starburst#candy#shots#glowsticks#dancing#lights#neon#green#blue#pink#black#rainbow#brown#red#stim#stim gif#stimboard
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One of the things I think of a lot with regards to John is—why didn't he have any friends in his real life?
None of the beta kids ever seem to mention having irl friends that they miss in the aftermath of the apocalypse. And yeah, they've got a lot of other stuff going on, and it's not really in the narrative's nature to bring up people not somehow involved with sburb, but on a watsonian level, if any of them had other friends that died in sburb's aftermath, you'd think they'd say something about that grief at some point.
It's relatively easy to explain away the other beta kids' friendlessness. Jade lives alone on an island, Dave is Dave (raised in an extremely weird way that does not make him well-suited for regular life), and Rose's mom is strange and rich enough that Rose probably goes to some shitty private school or has an online tutor or something.
But John is such a public school-type kid through and through. He's just some guy. But the more I think about him, the more I'm thinking about why he must not have any friends. He canonically spends most of his time online.
He's into (poorly) coding, shitty movies, online games, and magic tricks, none of which are a particular recipe for popularity—especially not as a twelve year old in 2009. He also has a peanut allergy.
Unfortunately, that's also probably a social strike against him. Schools are historically really bad at dealing with kids with severe allergies. There's decent odds John was eating alone and isolated at an "allergy table."
Overall, he's kind of made for being a run of the mill social outcast. He's not Dave levels of weird, and he might not be horribly bullied, but he absolutely strikes me as the few to no friends sort in a really painfully mundane way. He's just some dweeb. He's painfully sincere and enthusiastic most of the time, yet clearly has some self-hatred issues deep down that he doesn't like to think about.
He likes unpopular things and lives his life online. And pre sburb, at least his online life seems happy! He has good friends! But I can't help but wonder what his hours not at his computer screen were like. It's hard being twelve years old and goofy and awkward and friendless.
All those deeply repressed internalized thoughts about how lame he is have to come from somewhere, y'know?
#john shines SO bright and is SO enthusiastic most of the time. aggressively so#he loves what he loves. and yet#lame kid. clowns. etc#it really makes me think about how those ideas end up in his head and what his school life must be like#and the peanut allergy on top of his interests—perfect unpopular nerd cocktail unfortunately#like John is the least angsty character in a lot of ways. esp pre-sburb john#he doesn't have a crazy horrible life like a lot of his friends#but the mundane relatability makes the struggles he does have all the worse y'know?#sorry I did warn y'all I was going to be losing it over John during this reread#homestuck#john egbert#homestuckposting#english major hours#andie rereads homestuck#and yeah I know that dave comic I linked is just a fanwork#but it rings SO real and true for me#it's canon in my heart and completely aligns with canon as far as I know#long post#ID in alt text#homestuck 72#<<it's about multiple pages but the allergy page is what prompted this
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feeling almost suicidal today
#the depression and anxiety made a perfect little cocktail in me today🙃#i would never but work hasn't made me feel like this in a long while#tw suicide mention
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so this friday is my final on-site day of a-levels and our teachers told us to come in dressed "hawaiian themed". so naturally i thought about what kind of clothes i have...and remembered i have a black button up with flames on it
suffice to say im dressing up as guy fieri. i have the glasses and some sort of thick bracelets too. im also putting my hair up in shitty little spikes with god knows how much gel after a friend bleaches it for me
pics WILL be provided
#it talks#i dont care that its not hawaiian themed#its close enough#stick a straw hat on me and a coconut cocktail and itll be perfect
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