#it gets boring tbh because what’s next?

[brainrothawks]

i’m never complaining about horikoshi ever again. fuck gege akutami tho, may he never know peace

[the-lark-ascending69]

Lumity is very cute but it seems like the kind of ship that would have a fandom so toxic it'd make you dislike the ship in time and I think that's sad.

[thesmokinpossum]

when you get in a crazy screaming match with some rabid misogynistic freak who was harassing women on the subway and who responds by insulting your physical appearance and telling you to kill yourself but then exits the train at the next station

[i-am-become-a-name]

What's your interpretation of the weird/annoyed look Five gets on his face when Tegan announces that she wants to rejoin the TARDIS at the end of Arc of Infinity? I know it was probably meant to be played for laughs, but it annoys me every time i watch that episode and i'm curious what headcanons people have about it.

My favourite thing I've read about it pointed out that the cybermen specifically used Tegan as a weakness against five, that she's what it took to manipulate him (and through no fault of either of them, Adric's death was part of those consequences.) The novelisation really goes in to the descriptions of the doctor transfixed with the blood running down Tegan's chin from her bitten lip, the building tension as the cybermen get closer and closer to killing her and he's shaking trying to hold himself back from admitting his hearts are so easy to twist, just by threatening his friends. (Does Nyssa ever leave the TARDIS when it's on the spaceship? The cybermen don't even know she exists til they come onboard do they?)

As for why he looks so annoyed? hmmm. Does anyone want someone around that constantly needles them? Really, I think pre Arc of Infinity that even though Tegan had chosen to stay, they still had that power imbalance or even just tension between them that she had not come on board willingly. So five is expecting that to be the continuing, I don't know, continuing manner between them and it hadn't been good. It had its moments (mainly in the audios) but as an arrangement it was not ideal as friends to explore the universe together, all that terrible beauty and awesome monsters.

But it doesn't continue on in that manner - oh they bicker and make faces at each other, sure, but Tegan's conscious decision to step back onto the TARDIS irons out those imbalances, removes that bitterness and the past of her aunt's death. So when he makes that wee face, it's in expectation of the previous status quo. And never let it be said that Tegan's one to do exactly what's expected of her.

Anyway I really hope this makes sense and I may add some more thoughts later but it's 1:50 am Christmas Eve and I couldn't sleep for thinking about this.

----

It's 2am I'm back. I feel like there's also this uneasiness in five about tegan, that mirror that no one likes being held up to themselves. Their similarities but the starkly different ways they express them must be exhausting to five. and here she is back again. To push and prod and challenge and be brashly beautifully glorious. wait. that last bit was the two am shipper coming out. Anyway they draw strength and resolve and anger from each other and Tegan was vital to five, from his first moments till his very last.

[fingertipsmp3]

I should neverrr have accepted this shift. Literally every problem I have would be irrelevant if I didn’t have to go to work today

[neverendingford]

.

[suiana]

imagine rejecting a yandere! god and he gets all mad and petty so he curses your love life

so maybe you used to be a cleric or something that worshipped him and he decided to be silly and come down to earth in a more human form (still godly but less flamboyant). he was bored and what better thing to do than to meet up with his worshippers? especially you, his most devout and sweet little thing?

of course, he eventually fell for you and confessed his feelings. you're just so captivating after all.

"hey i really like you-"

"sorry, i am only meant for my lord and saviour☺️ we can still be friends."

"oh... that's not..."

yeah, he kinda forgot that you think he's joking about him being your god and stuff... oops...

whatever! you should've accepted him anyway! you'd break your vows for him wouldn't you?! apparently not.

yeah, so he decided to curse your love life becase he's petty like that and you wouldn't give him that time of day. wouldn't even entertain his delusions for a bit smh. how could you just leave a literal god heartbroken like that?

and just like that, your first life as a devout worshipper came to an end.

your next few lives were... rather tragic too.

all your lovers would randomly die, disappear, or leave just when things were getting good. it was infuriating and you were starting to think that the gods had something against you. well, more like a god had a thing for you but who cares right?

meanwhile, your petty and childish god was just watching over you from his abode. he really likes watching you. no, he's not a stalker. he's a god. there's a difference okayn gods can watch over humans like this! what? creepy? no he's not creepy! don't call him that!

he... also probably has a shrine and collection full of things from all your lives or something tbh. and no! it's mot creepy!

in any case, he didn't interfere in any of your lives directly up until your current life.

when you suddenly showed an interest in him again.

yes, after your first life you had also forgotten all about him. no, it wasn't a part of the curse he laid on you. it was probably just your soul getting revenge on him for cursing you. or... maybe it was because you were human. duh. unfortunately, your god has a peanut sized brain.

in your current life while reading on about mythology for your studies, you started gaining interest in him again.

"huh... god of... mischief? sounds like a real troublemaker."

you immediately moved on to another god after that.

and the god lets out an audible gasp.

how could you be so cruel? not even a, oh he was hot or something like that? just a simple he was a troublemaker???

also, he was not a troublemaker!

sure he might've meddled with your romantic partners and cursed your love life... and also caused some major disagreements in human history... but that's just a little bit of tomfoolery! a little bit of trolling if you will!

ugh! he's seriously getting mad again!

guess he'll have to come back to meet you in person to show you he means business this time.

[ratatoastwrites]

Victoria’s secret

Spencer Reid x fem!Reader

nsfw, 18+ MDNI

a/n: munch spencer, we all say in unison 😫 i wrote this cuz i was bored at the mall lol, does that count as public indecency? haha jk, but that is lowkey what this blurb is about ✨😮‍💨 also special challenge, take a shot every time i use the word lace lol

cw: oral (f receiving), tiny bit of fingering, bit of rough kissing yum, lingerie (obvi), umm kinda public indecency tbh lol, borderline exhibitionism ig but it isn’t really mentioned just subtext ig, uhhh what else, oh yea friends to lovers kinda (or fwb if u fancy, it is kinda vague), no written aftercare cuz again i just couldn’t be bothered, also this is an unedited & no beta & english is my second language mess as per usual mwah 🧚‍♀️

also also special shout out to @apple-pie-and-impala for never getting annoyed with me about the way that 90% of our text msgs revolve around this man 🤭 love ya, my little enabler 🫶

When you first asked Spencer to go lingerie shopping with you, he didn’t think much of it

He honestly believed that it was just going to be a normal hangout between two friends, because really, there wasn’t anything inherently sexual about the prospect of an adult person wearing underwear

Well, that thought lasted until about five seconds after he stepped into the store with you

It was hard not to let his thoughts wander as he watched you running your fingers across the lace fabric of a matching lilac set, his breath catching in his throat as he imagined you actually wearing it

He watched you pick out a few sets, his heart hammering in his chest as his head filled with more and more sinful thoughts

So when you coyly asked him if he wanted to accompany you to the back (your excuse being that you didn’t want to get bored all alone back there), he didn’t even hesitate before nodding vigorously

As he sat in one of the chairs just outside the fitting room you were in, he contemplated that this might be his purgatory

He could hear the rustling of your clothes, and he knew that you were wearing those torturous sets of lace, and yet he couldn’t do anything about it, forced to sit tight and listen to your chatter through the curtain, trying to will away the painful hardness in his pants

“Spence, could you come in here for a second? The straps are a little loose, and I can’t quite reach the clips.”

He froze for a moment at your seemingly innocent request, before standing up on shaky legs and pulling the curtain to the side just enough for him to slip inside the small, closed space next to you

When he finally turned to look at you, he almost collapsed on the spot

You were wearing a white set with intricate lacing that left hardly anything to the imagination, your hands cupping your breasts to keep the bralette from slipping down, the straps hanging loosely over your shoulders

As soon as your eyes locked together, the air seemed to crackle between you, and he wasted no time pushing you against the nearest wall and kissing you like his life depended on it

He was a needy mess in just a few seconds as his hands glided across your skin, mapping every inch of your body that he could reach, while he familiarised himself with your taste

Your hands pulled on his hair as he sunk to his knees in front of you, and you had to bite down on your bottom lip as you watched him pull the dainty panties you were wearing to the side, his puppy eyed gaze making you weak in the knees

You gasped as you felt him press a tentative kiss on your clit, having to slap a hand over your mouth as he immediately followed it up by lapping at your wet folds enthusiastically

He had you shaking in a matter of minutes, eating you out like your pussy was his ambrosia and he had been starving for years

You had to balance yourself on the wall as he put one of your legs over his shoulder, his tongue exploring your insides, the new angle making his nose nudge against your clit with every move

He replaced his tongue with two of his fingers, his lips wrapping around your clit, sucking on it like it was his favourite dessert in the world

You gripped his hair tightly as you came with a loud gasp of his name, rutting against his face, the vibrations of his whimpers making your eyes roll back in immense pleasure

His tongue worked you through it all, licking up your juices languidly, until you had to push his head away when your eyes started tearing up from overstimulation

It was safe to say that you ended up buying that set, walking out of the store hand in hand with Spencer, before leaving the mall to go back to his place, eager to return the favour

[iwaasfairy]

okok so so think bout older brother sukuna sticking his dick in you when you're drunk outta reaason and barely even talking. he thinks it's your fault tbh, who drinks that much liquor and not expect this? it's honestly your fault, clinging to him and looking up at him with those unfocused eyes because— idk, it's your big brother? you wouldn't expect him to be groping and kissing your skin at 3am while you weakly ask him "what're you doing, kuna nii? stop it... ):"

for hiMMMM my eyes are open thEY ARE SEEING IT BABE

tw. incest, somno, noncon, degradation, spit

Big, tattooed hands wrap around your thighs to pull them apart. You’re an absolute piece of work. Seriously. His larger body sinks into the mattress as he gets up onto his knees next to you, and you hum into an unintelligible mumble. “Mh-Kuna, sh-tp mn-” Even sleeping, you’re as bratty as you are big, pretty lips jutting out to make your displeasure known. You talk a lot, for someone who can’t lift a finger to stop him. His hands find the soft plush of your thighs to squeeze the skin tighter in his hands, when he lets out a breath.

“Stop your whinin’. You’re the one making me…” He trails off when his touch makes your back arch, pushing your ass up to show off your slutty fucking panties. Underwear is a word too nice for the scraps of string that are meant to cover you. “This is what you get for getting spit on my shirt.” Sukuna doesn’t bother trying to be quiet as he maneuvers you around him with spread legs and your ass up in the blankets— like you’re straddling a ghost with the way you wiggle around in the position.

He clicks his tongue, before rubbing all long fingers around you and cupping your heat. “This is why niisan doesn’t let you do nothin’, you fucking slut. Look at yourself right now.” His voice is low, squeezing your hot pussy in his palm. You’ll be awake anyway, once he’s done with you. You’re already hot between your thighs, bottom lips making a wet patch on the crotch.

He places one elbow next you your shoulders before getting down over you. He sort of wishes you’d learn your fucking lesson already. Remembering the way you pouted and slurred into his bicep when pulling you out of the car makes his brows furrow, the whined ‘Kuna nii~’ replaying between his ears. It isn’t the first time he’s pulled some shit. Really, you should know better. Learn a bit quicker. Any younger sister worth something would.

Instead you just resort to trusting him endlessly. No matter how often he presses you to the wall to force his tongue into your mouth. Or the way he makes you gyrate on his lap when he’s bored, glowing with embarrassment and whining for him to stop. His own fucking flesh and blood— you’re seriously sick in the head, aren’t you. He’ll show you what all that trust gets you. Your own fault, brat. If your brother’s a total pervert when you’re awake, what the hell possesses you to fall asleep in his bed all pretty and vulnerable?

He takes a few deep breaths before descending on your neck and lapping up your scent, as drunken moans make their way out of your half-parted mouth. “K-kuna nii~” His tongue and lips stick to your pulse for long enough to make an obvious mark. His hands pull the slicked up strings down the curve of your ass, only grunting in slight irritation when one side snaps. You twitch at the sting, but don’t wake. Only roll over halfway to click your tongue against your teeth in search of his warmth. “Su-k’na nii… no. Sta-hp.”

You’re drooling. He can’t help it, he laughs. “If you know it’s me, you should stop me already— shitty fucking sister.” His thumb slides into your mouth to push down on your tongue and open the way for his own tongue, dripping hot spit onto your lips as you whimper. “It’s big brother who’s gonna fuck you. You’re okay with that?” His other hand drags fingertips through your slick, pushing one finger inside into your soft, sloppy pussy. His tongue slides over your lips as he crawls over you fully, pushing his hard cock into your thigh close enough to make you mewl.

Your pussy clicks with the wetness when he pushes in with another, stretching you out further and further. His cock twitches in his pants, until he pushes that down and strokes himself, wet, drooling tip against your belly.  “You don’t wanna wake up. ‘Cus you love being mistreated like this, right bitch? Want ‘kuna niichan to make use of all you’re good for?” He takes the hand out of you to push your shirt up over your tits, and smears your wetness over your chest as he grips the softness.

His cock thumping against your pussy, he lets out a deep grunt, then squeezes his fat balls. “You’re just a little breeding bitch for me, aren’t ya.” His much larger body over you, muscles clenching as he covers you with his own limbs, he gets onto his knees just enough to let the tip push against your swollen, slick lips. His heavy cock looks much too big to fit, but looking at that sleeping, contorted little face— you’ll take it either way. “Wanna feel how your big brother loves you?”

When the tip grinds over your clit, your mouth cracks open with more moans, throwing your head back. “Oops, looks like that feels good? Feel good for big brother? Fucking cock slave.” Then he pushes the thick, drooling head in more, and your back starts to arch so your peeked nipples push against him. His hand winds around the top of your thigh, letting the head of his hot cock snap inside — and your desperate whispering turns hitched, and your eyelids flutter.

Your hot, tight little clutch around him is enough to have his shoulders flexing and his mouth pushing to yours. “Ah, fuck. That’s it.”

You’re such a sweet little thing that you even let him kiss you, as your eyes open. “Mh-mhhm- nii-dan.” Pushing in a few inches at once, he smiles into your mouth. “-K-kuna, st-oh fuuuck~ st-op.” Your arms wrap around him to dig your nails into his back, but it’s no use. He can feel your desperate clenching around him as he pushes you open, and tears spring into your eyes. “Please stop, I’m gonna- b- Kuna nii. Kuna nii. Stop it-”

But your hot, little clutch only feels better and better the deeper he pushes- until your eyes bulge and you go limp below him, giving yourself over to him. “Nuh uh. That’s a good cockslut sister. Take it all.”

[catiuskaa]

need you to [Lee] Know.

SUMMARY: minho loves you: to him, it’s as clear as water. Its only after he finds out that you’re starting to doubt it—he needs you to know just how much.

REQUESTED! here by an anonnie. I hope you like it, pookie, ‘cause I had fun doing this! <3

CW: slight hurt/comfort if you squint, but it’s just fluffy fluffy lino being really down bad and not knowing how to grasp it tbh which just gives me my serotonin dosis for the rest of the month lol

WC: 1.2k

A/N: also omfg kats posting two requests on the same day? that’s right baby, look at me go! 🤩🤩🤩

[🔅★🌼★🔅]

Minho was not the type to show his affection.

He comes off more like a shy kitten that slowly gets used to you, your sweet smell and how soft your touch feels, and then slowly opens up.

“But, uh… can I be real with you for a sec?”

It’s a feminine voice with a strong accent. He can hear it comming from your room, and the slight glitchiness of it makes it obvious that it’s a phone call set on speaker.

“Sure.” He can almost see you shrug, but he just closes the main door as soft as he can, pleading for the cats to stay silent for a little bit longer.

Minho can’t exactly place together why he’s overhearing your phone call. He knows who you’re calling, he can recognize Chan’s sister by her tone. But still, he keeps quiet, gently placing his bag down and silently taking his shoes off.

“I just— and don’t get me wrong, but, your boyfriend kinda seems… bored of you.”

What? Minho has to hold back a scoff, remaining as still as a statue next to the front door. He’s waiting for you to deny it.

“You think so?”

And then, he frowns, because you didn’t. Instead, your tone sounded hesitant. Dubious.

As if you weren’t sure if Minho loved you.

“You say he keeps cancelling your plans together. He has stopped making time for you. Like, girl, you can’t remember when was the last time he told you he loved you.”

Hannah pauses, and that only makes it worse, because it lets every word sink in.

“I uh, well. I ain’t gonna say that he should throw flowers at you every single second, but, uh, you know.”

He can only hear you groan loudly, almost picturing that cute motion you usually did when he meaningly teased you, taking your hair and covering your face with it.

“Can’t say anything for sure with him,” Hannah adds. “But, just by what you’re saying…”

Minho’s heart clenches tightly in his chest. He doesn’t want to keep hearing this... this nonsense. God, he loves you. And you… can’t see it? Frowning, he starts walking to your room, but his movements end in a halt, his hand just above the doorknob, threatening to grasp it and fully open the door.

“Girl, it’s gotta be late down there. Sorry this whole call was about me.” Your chuckle comes off slightly dry. “I’ll talk to you later, ‘kay? Go get some good sleep.” Your tone just screams how bad you’re feeling, and it just makes his chest swell with guilt that slowly creeps up his body.

Maybe he had been taking you for granted?

He opens the door as soon as you press the red button, sighing loudly after ending the call. When you see him, you jump in your place, startled by his presence, and you stand up awkwardly.

“Minho!” You say in a squirm. He can’t help but cringe slightly.

“No.” His tone sounds childish, like a petty toddler who didn’t want to eat the carrots in their lunch.

You frown slowly, the slightly wary grimace melting on your face, allowing a soft confusion to step in.

“No what?” You mutter.

He walks to you slowly, and grabs your hand, taking it to his chest, pressing it flat against his clothed skin, over his heart. You can feel his heartbeat, a not-too-slow rhythm: thump, thump, thump.

“Call me by a pet name. Any pet name.” He says, his tone equally firm and soft. “Call me by a pet name and say you love me.”

He’s serious, but god, so fucking nervous. His brain is slowly melting away because he’s so bad with words and he isn’t sure any action could be enough. He’s already blushing.

“I, huh… I love you, jagi.” You mumble, still confused.

And even if you don’t say it as fondly as always, or if your smile isn’t beaming like how it usually did, you can feel his heartbeat quickening.

“You can feel it, right?” His eyes are soft and worried.

Oh, God. You just know you’ve gotta be pouting. It’s hard to react with words, and the only thing you can fathom doing is linking your arms behind his nape and sinking your face on the crook of his neck.

“Min, I’m so sorry.”

“N-no, kitten.” He mumbles, hugging you tightly too. “I am the one who’s sorry.”

He breathes in, drowning in your soft fragrance. Home. It’s you, it’s warm, and he loves it.

He loves you.

So, he says it. He has to say it. He can’t not say it.

“I love you.”

And it feels so good to let it out that he chuckles. He has to say it again. “I love you.” And again. “God, I love you.” Just once more. “I love you so much.” He’s giggling like a fool, but he’s a fool in love, and that makes him blush even more. “I can’t not love you. Not loving you would turn everyday into Mondays. Like, I can get it tattoed if you want me to. I just. I love you so much that ‘I love you’ can’t even—.”

You move from his shoulder, now facing him, and you cradle his face, pulling him in a kiss that’s so sweet that threatens to give both of you type 1 diabetes.

“Y-you’re crying.” Minho mumbles, softly brushing the stray tears away with his thumb.

“It’s your fault, silly.” You sniff, giggling too. “How can you say stuff like that?”

Your heart is beating like crazy, the butterflies in your stomach are multiplying by seconds and in your cheeks glistens a bright and deep shade of pink.

You want to say it too. But in his own way.

So, you take his hand and settle it on your chest. Right above your heart.

It’s a rapid thump thump thump that Minho feels right away. He can’t help but smile widely.

“I super-mega-love you.” He teases, picking you up in between his arms.

You’re laughing, squirming in his hold.

“Lee Minho! Put me down!”

But he just grips your body tighter to his, and walking as if you weighted nothing, heading towards your bed, plopping you down there.

“Good girl.” He snickers, and you blush even further. Minho takes your chin tenderly and pecks your lips. For a moment, certain kind of idea flashes through his head, but he just kissed you again, following his previous thought.

He opens your closet with a toothy grin, and halfly eyes the window before picking up a random shirt, a grey hoodie that used to be his, a dark skirt and your thigh-high socks, going as far as to the suspenders for you.

He then turns to face you, his eyes glowing. He can’t wait to see you all dolled up. Minho feels like a teenager, and he loves it.

“You have twenty minutes.”

You blink at him, and you can’t help but smile, confused.

“I’m taking your cute ass to a date.”

It may not be an instant fix to the struggles to your relationship, but as you two walk down the beach, looking for colourful rocks that match each other’s eye colour, you know that he’s worth fighting for.

Regarding Minho, he happily hums to himself, eyes glued to your figure as you cackle and run in the beach, as you look behind you and giggle at the prints your boots leave in the humid sand.

He smiles, running towards you, tackling you and holding you in his arms.

He’s not letting go anytime soon.

~Kats, who always struggles to choose a picture for the fics because istg lino looks good in every single moment!!

[lua-stellar]

What is Your Next Lover's Love Language?? ✨ Tarot Divination

reading was done via tarot cards, lil side note i (personally) find the concept of love languages recessive and rigid. Most people including ur guys' next lovers will likely show all 5 love languages. However i think its rly fun for tarot readings and for communicating what ur future lover is like enjoy :)

consider tipping me on ko-fi if you liked this reading :))

pile 1

cards drawn: reversed page of pentacles, the hierophant, reversed four of swords

so I get the vibe that your next lover will have a problem, or problems in the past with commitment, or they have been in relationships with people who were not very into commitment which can hurt someone. But i feel that this person, it takes alot for them to actually want to commit to a relationship. I think the commitment thing ties into the fact that they want to feel very safe and comfortable in a relationship,they want to be with someone who is a good choice for them, someone who they can be themselves around and be in control around. They are someone who wants to spend alot of time with someone and get to know them before 100% committing to a relationship, because although commitment is a big topic in this reading as in its scary for this person, the truth is they want nothing else except commitment. They want to be with someone in the long term, ideally, they want to be able to go to the next step with someone they truly love, like marriage for example. Like i get some polarizing energies from this person like a real all or nothing vibe. There is a chance that this person might even be arospec, like im getting demi-romantic vibes you know. This person's love language might definently be strong on quality time, possibly acts of service and recieving gifts but quality time is STRONG in this one tbh. You will likely spend alot of time with this person before eventually becoming their lover, they might even be a future friend first (or a current friend maybe?? if the shoe fits >w>)

pile 2

cards drawn: page of wands, reversed strength, judgement,

this person is someone who wants to take you out on dates, they want to spoil you and they are someone who in the future will likely be very attracted to you and realllyyy like passionate about you i feel. They are someone who is all in commitment wise, and they are ready to take things further with you, they are however incredibly insecure person. Like strong acts of services vibes but also this person will likely also be big on words of affirmation because they are so insecure, you will likely have to 'affirm' them as this person is very insecure to a fault. They are big on communication which is a big plus, even though they are very committed to you they will want to know if you are as well and they will want to be able to work out any potential problems you two have, they are someone who wants to communicate, take things further, etc etc. The main energy i get from your next lover is that they will be big on acts of services and words of affirmation because they want to communicate with you and they want to know if you are as committed as they are.

pile 3

cards drawn: reversed the sun, the emperor, reversed eight of wands,

I feel as though this person may not know what they want out of a relationship, so they may not see the good things right away and get bored easily. This person would honestly, probably require quality time because if not they will get bored, they are probably emotionally immature. This person however, even if they can't see the good things right away, feels very stable with you. In the future its obvious that they will like you alot and even be protective of you! Big acts of service vibes just for that protective energy they have, im getting a vibe that this person most likely will be male, but they can be any gender they might just have some traditionally masculine qualities. I'm not sure what love language this falls in but this person wants to take things slow, they probably feel anxious or unsure when they feel things are moving too fast they want things to move slowly, and it's probably better that way with this specific personality as they will need time to see the good things. They probably focus ont he negative alot, but give them time to warm up to you basically.

[tonysbed]

Vegas and the consequences | MV1

Max Verstappen x driver!reader

Summary: What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas..

warnings: SMUT, This is nasty, getting watched, threesome ;) Unexpected dom> sub switch :o Squirting , Safe word (also used), After care

masterlist

A/n: This is the Vegas Part to this. Also, I wasn’t a fan in 2021 so…Yeah I think Vegas wasn’t even a track until 2023?😭 This is so long, I don’t know how that happened tbh

English is not my first language, I barely proof read and I’m insecure abt my Smut writing.

-Vegas 2021-

Vegas was famous for their busy streets, casinos and party’s. But also for Formula one.

Max had won again, barely a second before you. You weren’t mad, because it was simply Max. Of course, winning and the feeling that came rushing with it was amazing, yet you loved seeing him happy. And P2 wasn’t bad.

He also had this battle going on with Lewis, which seemed really interesting but intense for everyone.

Max’s arm was firmly placed around you, his hand squeezing your waist from time to time. He was talking to Daniel and you looked around a little, talking to him from time to time.

Your eyes met dark brown ones. His eyebrows raised and a questioning but teasing look on his face. You rolled your eyes at him and turned back to Max and Daniel, who hadn’t noticed the encounter.

You excused yourself to the bathroom. You were washing your hands when Lily, Alex Albon’s girlfriend, came out of a stall and greeted you.

She looked over at you while washing her hands, and you could feel that there was something burning on her tongue “Lily, just ask whatever it is” You chuckle

“That obvious?” You nod and she blushed a little “What’s this whole thing with Hamilton? I mean, him and max okay, but you and him?” You raised an eyebrow.

“What do you mean, Me and him?”

“You’ve been looking over at him a few times now. And so did he. He kept looking for you in the room”

“Did he say that?”

“No but it was obvious. George pointed it out to me and Alex.”

You nod “I don’t think he was staring at me tho. I was a little confused at his looks but I’m pretty sure he was looking at Max” You chuckle.

“Mh..I don’t know” You rolled your eyes in a playful manner “Come on, let’s go party. We still have a Redbull 1-2 to celebrate” She smiled.

You were clinging onto Max, getting needier the more alcohol got into your system. He was aware of it and shortly afterwards, he excused you and him from the party. It wasn’t a secret what you guys were up to.

Multiple drivers have walked in on you, either in bathrooms, your car or other places you weren’t supposed to be. The thought made you chuckle.

The uber drive was quiet but you didn’t need to say anything for Max to understand you. He knew you like the back of his hand. The squirming you had been doing the whole time was telling him everything he needed to know.

The moment the hotel door closed behind you, your back met the cold wall next to it and Max’s hands were all over you “So needy hm? My pretty girl” He hummed at you.

You gazed into his eyes and pulled him into a kiss “Shut up Verstappen” His eyebrows shot up and he pulled away “Oh? Bratty much today, aren’t we?”

You shake your head “Would never do that” You smirked, making him almost threw you on the bed. His tall frame was towering over you.

“Dress off. Now” His eyes bore into you and send a shiver down your spine. You took off your dress and laid back, underwear still on.

You popped yourself up on your elbows “You gonna do something or you just gonna stare, Maxie?” He chuckled darkly while setting two cameras up, having an angle from the foot of the bed and the side, filming the whole room behind it too.

“Not only a brat but also impatient”His fingertips brushed along your legs. You head falls backwards “Maxie, please”

He chuckled again, now leaning over you “You want me?” You nod “So bad, please” His hands slowly rubbed your sides, making their way downward.

“Don’t think you deserve it yet, love. “ You tilt your head at him “Go on” He whispered while looking into your eyes. He leaned back into his knees.

You sat up, tugging at the hem of his shirt, throwing it across the room. Next were his jeans. If there was a record for opening Jeans, you would win, Max was sure of that.

The way you were secure in every move you made, making him even harder. Your hands brushed his cock and he moaned “Shit”

You pulled down his Jeans alongside his boxers. You whined, not being able to get them off completely due to his kneeling position on the bed “Max” You whined.

“Yes pretty girl?” He looked down at you “Off” You tugged at his Pants and underwear. He decided he had tortured you enough on it and swiftly pushed them off and then off the bed.

Your soft hands immediately find his cock.He hissed at the contact, loving how your hands feel on him.

You licked up his shaft and hummed. Max’s hands found their way into your hair. He combed through your hair while you happily sucked him off.

You hollowed your cheeks and sucked harder at his bright red tip “Fuck-fuck-fuuuuck, Schatje” You smiled as good as you could, knowing you were driving him closer to the edge.

One of your hands find his balls, squeezing them “Good god, Schatje” His breathing was getting uneven and heavy “Will you let me cum in your pretty mouth?” You nodded as good as you could in your current position, making his eyes roll backward.

“I’m cumming already-God, you fuuuuck” He spilled inside your mouth, which you gladly swallowed. You held your tongue out to him “Oh even swallowed? Such a good girl” He smirked at you.

He hovered over you again, his right hand ghosting over your clothed pussy. Your mouth opened with a silent moan. He kept teasing you, gently biting your neck, already knowing your pr manager will have his head, yet for now it’s worth it.

You saw movement from the corner of your eye and looked to the door of the hotel room. There stood Lewis, not even surprised “Maxie” You breathed.

“Mh?” He hummed, not stopped his abuse on your neck “Lewis” His head snapped up “What did you say?” His voice and body tensed.

You nodded towards the door, which made max turn around “Hamilton. Enjoying the view?” Max teased.

“You on your knees? Yeah, absolutely” He shut the door behind him, making you gulp. Now you were thinking about what Lily had said earlier. He wasn’t looking for you, or max. He was looking for both of you.

Max raised his eyebrows as Lewis stepped closer. His eyes quickly wandered over your form and went back to Max “Why’d you keep teasing the poor baby, hm? Just look at her, worship her”

“You think I’m not worshipping her?” He sounded offended “Mh, I don’t know Verstappen, do you?” Lewis eyes darkened while Max just stared at him.

You whined, making both men look at you “Am I getting ignored now, I was good” You almost pouted “Yeah Verstappen, do something” Lewis said darkly.

Max didn’t know what to say or do. His head was empty and confused. Lewis chuckled “Look at that Baby, I made him dumb, hm? Not such a big mouth anymore when you’re off the track?”

Max gulped as Lewis let his hands wander over his chest, eyes never leaving yours. You clenched your thighs together, making Lewis chuckle “You like when I touch him, sweetheart?” You nodded.

“You want to feel good?” You nod again “Words.”

“Yes” Lewis smiled proudly “You heard her, didn’t you Max?” He nodded, still stunned.

Your back arched as soon as his mouth was on you. Lewis combed through his hair with his fingers, the other hand reaching your waist, holding it down.

Never in a thousand years you would’ve thought you’d end up in this situation, especially not with Lewis Hamilton.

You’d seen the possibility of it happening with Charles, but not Lewis.

You grabbed Lewis wrist, needing something to hold on. Max‘s Nose met your clit while he pushed his tongue into you. You let out a high pitched moan.

Lewis chuckled and let his hand wander to your throat, leaning his face close to yours „He makin you feel good, sweetheart?“

You nod and your eyes roll into the back of your head when Max pushed two of his fingers into you. Lewis smiled and pressed his lips onto yours. You moan into his mouth, all the hands on you making you feel crazy.

“Lew“ He hummed “Need more, please, please, please” He chuckled but pulled Max off you. Both of you releasing a sound of disapproval. He hushed you.

“What you want, baby?” You look at him confused “Think you can even take me, hm?” Your eyes flicker to max, who glares at Lewis.

The brit gripped your throat thighter “Answer me, pretty girl.” You shrug “I’ve never seen you”

He smirks but looks at max “You want me to take care of your girl, hm? Or you wanna fuck her with me?”

Lewis has never seen Max so dumbfounded. The tall man just backed off the bed and let Lewis take over. You focused on Max, not being used to Max backing down so easily.

You didn’t know why he’d do it. If it was linked to the rivalry the two shared on track? You couldn’t continue your train of thoughts because Lewis was running his hand over your body, his cold rings making you shiver.

He had removed everything except his boxers. Jokes on him, they weren’t doing anything to hide him.(Not that he wanted that)

You pulled down his boxers and pulled him to you on the bed. His head now resting against the headboard, his left hand finding its way into your hair.

Your fingers slowly wander over the obvious bulge in his underwear. His jaw clenched and his grip in your hair tightened “Baby, come on” He breathed.

You happily obligated and pulled his boxers down. His cock rested against his stomach, your eyes widened. He wasn’t that much longer than Max, yet he was more thick than max. You let out a breath and Lewis cradled your head.

You took him in your mouth and sucked his hesd “Oh jeez, baby” You hummed and his head fell back against the headboard. You wrapped your hand around the part that didn’t fit in your mouth.

His fingers tighten around your hair and his eyes gaze at you so softly, it makes you wanna suck him the whole night.

His moaning was music to your ears. You sped up your actions, which Lewis shot his eyes open to “Oh my goodness, baby. Shit-Holy jesus”

You chuckled “You gonna cum in my mouth?” He nodded “Yeah baby, shit” The way his eyes rolled into the back of his head made your thighs clench together.

He came down your throat, which you also swallowed. He smirked at you but his head snapped to his right when you heard a whine. One that definitely didn’t come from you.

Lewis makes a ‘come here’ motion with two fingers towards max “Impatient much huh? You wanna cum?”

Max nods and Lewis turns to you “Sweetheart, do you have toys?” You nod “Can you get them all for me?” You nod again and run to the bathroom. You had put them in a locked cabinet, not fond of the idea that your mother or other people would find them.

When you can back into the room, Max was tied to the bed with all four limbs. You’d never expect to see your max in that position.

You stood dumbfounded in the doorway while Lewis checked the restraints and looked up at you “Got them all, sweet thing?” You nodded, walking towards him with the box and handing it to him.

He placed it next to Max, examining each toy carefully. His smile widened when he pulled out a magic wand. You raised your eyebrows, not sure of his intentions.

“Can you tell me a number up till 10?” He asked, still focused on the toy in his hand “Yeah..” You thought for a moment.

“6” Lewis chuckled“Okay, seems like it’s gonna be a hell of a night for you, Verstappen. Your girl just told me she wants you to cum 6 times”

“Are yo out of your mind, how am I-“ Lewis cut him off “Shush before I make it more”

Your eyes were wide, and hands fidgeting with each other. This wasn’t unwelcome but a complete new experience for you.

“What are you doing?” You asked more quiet then intended. Lewis looked at you and his eyes softened at your state “Come here baby, I’ll explain.” He patted the side next to him.

You crawled over to him and sat between Max’s legs with lewis. Lewis let Max’s cock down onto his stomach before looking at the tall man.

“You know the traffic light system, Max?” He nods “Good. What colour is it right now?”

“Green” Lewis nods at him and turns the wand on. Max hissed at the new vibration surrounding his cock.

Lewis turned to you “Did he use the wand on you, honey?” You nod “Words?”

“He did” “How?” “Held it on my clit, and my tits”

You say blushing, not used to being so vocal about your sex life to someone else than max.

“Then you know how it feels, yeah?” “Yes” Lewis hummed and turned the wand up “Max wanted to cum, right?” “He did”

“We should let him, right?” You nod eagerly and Lewis smiles at your reaction “And what about you baby? You wanna cum too?”

You look down shyly “Nuh uh. Don’t turn all shy on me now. Tell me, do you wanna cum? Do you want me to make you cum?”

“Yes” Lewis smirks before turning the wand up to its highest setting.

He gets up from the bed and sits in a nearby armchair “Come here, baby” He pats his lap. Your eyes were fixed on the way Max was whining and squirming, tears forming in his eyes.

“He’s just feeling good, sweetheart. Come here so I can make you feel good” His eyes followed you. Your legs straddled his and you gasped when his fingers went through your slit.

“Time to make you finally cum, hm? You took such good care of us, you deserve it”

You nod breathless “What you need, my fingers? My mouth? my cock?” Lewis smiled up at you “want your cock,please-“

He pulled you down by the throat, capturing your lips with his “No need to ask twice” You felt his tip at your entrance and grabbed his shoulders.

“Breath, sweetheart.” You didn’t even notice you were holding your breath.

You slowly sunk down on him, the pain slowly turning into welcomed pleasure. He found your g-spot pretty easily,scary easily.

“Right there? Yeah?” You nod eagerly “Fuck-Oh my god, Lewis” Your nails were probably drawing blood from him by now but you didn’t care.

The only thing you cared about was the pleasure that Lewis was providing you with. His hand slipped between you, rubbing your clit gently.

“Oh my god. I’m gonna cum already-fuck” He smirked “You can cum whenever you want, sweet thing. Come on, make a mess on my cock”

Hot white pleasure filled your body, arms tightening around his neck and eyes shut close.

The hands gently stroking your sides grounded you “You back, baby?” You hummed and looked at the man under you “Look at the mess you made, huh?” You looked down at yourself and him “I’m sorry-Oh no-“

He hushed you with a kiss “Nothing to worry about. That was hot, sweetheart. Your good” You relax and let your head fall to his shoulder. You slowly begin to grind on him.

What are you doing?” “You didn’t cum yet” “I don’t have to” “Please” You held his face in your hands “You want my cum that bad?” You nod “Work for it then”

You hiss at the overstimulation but it wasn’t unbearable. Lewis noticed and pulled you back “Colour?” “Still green” He nodded “Tell me if it changes” You nod and continue your work on him.

A strangled moan made you turn around. You completely forgot Max was still there. And according to the mess on his stomach he had cum already one or two times.

You gasped and looked back at lewis “Relax baby. I’ll know when he can’t anymore. Back to us, hm?”

You nod and start bouncing on him. It didn’t take him long to tumble over the edge with the way you clenched around him and the sight of Max on the bed.

“Shit, I’m cumming. Oh dear god” He pulled you flush against him and groaned into you neck. He slowly relaxed his grip on you and the only sound filling the room was vibrations and Max.

Max was close again, having seen how his girlfriend squirted on his rival, and make him cum too.

Before he knew it, he came for the fourth time that night. The pain was now creeping up on him and the pleasure leaving him.

Lewis went into the bathroom, quickly cleaned you up and pulled a hoodie over your head. He sat you down in the armchair with a fluffy blanket, eyes always checking Max.

He knew the dutch man was on his breaking point, yet to proud for his own good.

Lewis sat on the armrest of the armchair and stroked your head, eyes already closed.

Max was squirming and crying but not giving up. When the dutch man let out a sound more of pain than pleasure, your eyes shot open and Lewis removed the magic wand in an instant.

“Sweetheart, can you bring me that towel?” Lewis pointed at a towel he had placed aside for max. You grabbed it and gave it to him. You watched them with glossy eyes, just wanna holding Max and be close to him.

Lewis also cleaned Max up and signaled you to lay down” Come cuddle with him, baby” You laid down on Max’s chest and let his arms tighten around you.

The cameras were long forgotten, but remembered when lewis walked towards them and turned them off.

He laid down behind you, letting his arm fall over you and Max.

Holy moly this was..fun to write? Had a writers block when she undressed Lewis 😃 Buz hey, I finally finished it. Don’t be all to harsh on me, I don’t write smut that often so it could be a little cringey 😞🎀💃

[blqstar]

main mha boys finding out their s/o’s tiktok famous

↳ featuring ; midoriya, bakugou, shoto

content warning: black reader, fluff, a lil bit of crack too, mention on y/n’s big booty and boobies 😏, profanity + slurs, not proofread (as always tbh lmao)

note: i literally just came up with this on the spot, i was so busy daydreaming, thinking about this lmao. y’all i promise a oneshot finna come out, im def a d1 procrastinator lolll

𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ𐀔 — izuku midoriya !

deku honestly isn’t the person to be on social media that much. really because he’s out training most of the time

but every time he gets the chance, he comes across videos of you

and when i say every time, i mean every single time lmao

edits, little clips of you from your original tiktok, even your own tiktoks you make.

baby, when he sees you in that video, in them lil black shorts and crop top

y’all his ass is DROOLING

he’s honestly a little flabbergasted but at the same time, he’s not. he knows his princess is absolutely drop dead gorgeous so it’s really no surprise that you would go viral.

he ends up following you after a while and decides to ask you about it, assuming that you didn’t know about it yourself

“hey , bunny , did you know you’ve been going viral lately ?”

“yeah , you ain’t know ? i’m surprised you didn’t know before , zuku-poo “

๋࣭ ⭑⚝ — katsuki bakugou !

i feel kats ain’t a person to have social media, so he shol don’t have no damn tiktok🧍🏽‍♀️

“wtf is tiktak ?”

“kats , it’s tiktok .”

“whatever the fuck it’s called, i ain’t gettin’ that shit .”

with some persistence and a little bit of ‘pretty girl’ charm, he puts it on his phone (he be lyin like a mug lmao)

one particular day where he’s a lil bored, he decides to go on tiktok for the one time

and the first vid on his fyp is…you?

wtf??

he watches you lip sing a song wearing his color in a orange sundress, accentuating your butt and boobs

how many times he’s watched it? yes.

nigga has turned into an all out simp

after he’s looked, he goes through your comments and sees tons of guys simping for you too.

nigga’s boiling now

“HEY , WTF BABE ? TAKE THIS SHIT DOWN !”

“how about…no .”

“DON’T TELL ME NO , YOU WEIRDO !”

this man is an actual diva sometimes lmaoo

⋆⁺₊❅. — shoto todoroki !

like deku, he isn’t much of the type to have social media.

not just because of training but because he’s not really interested in those types of things. especially tiktok

but once he heard you talking about it to him the day before, he went to see what it was all about. (mans is obsessed w u like anything u talk abt he wants to know about lol)

and first thing he saw was you in a little black sundress and recording yourself in the mirror, showing off your figure

baby boy blushed (hes so cute)

he went through multiple clips and edits of you, even going through your profile and watching your videos.

during this, you were caught in the midst of it, watching his phone from behind

“babe~ , are you stalking my videos ?”

“yeah ofc , you look so gorgeous . send me the vids before you post next time . wanna be the first one to see ‘em .”

[becausegoodheroesdeservekidneys]

BORIS JOHNSON RESIGNS AS MP. Thoughts? The people howl for a new update to the Big Dog the Clown saga.

Yes this was not on my personal bingo card; my most recent Big Dog event was that a friend of mine works for air traffic control and recently had to delay BoJo's holiday flight by four hours, and on being told that this particular plane had to be prioritised for a runway slot because it contained an Important Clown promptly pushed it to the bottom of the priority list. Lol. And then all this! What larks.

Okay not a lot of detail yet still but LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT THE EVENTS OF 9TH JUNE, 2023 and you know what? It's been a while. Let's do it properly.

7.15am

Another day dawns in the reign of evil Grand Vizier-turned-PM Rishi Sunak. He's a very boring flavour of evil, tbh. Say what you will about Johnson, but at least there was spectacle and showmanship to his clownshow. Something for the children to boo and hiss. An animate ham in a villain's wig, something to really enjoy as you sit back, relax, and savour a tall, cool glass of schadenfreude.

By contrast Rishi just gets sycophants - who are no less ridiculous, but far more grey and boring - who pretend he's a tech bro because "he understands AI" and they think that will make him a visionary and a man of the future and maybe some sort of Elon Musk figure, because that's obviously a smashing template to be copied in a leader of a country.

This briefing was presumably drafted using ChatGPT.

Anyway, this is what we thought the day would be: another dreary overcast washout, livened up by Downing Street's latest attempt at making Sunak seem like a good idea to stave off the hulking spectre of Labour's inevitable GE win next year. How trite. How tedious. How mediocre.

What a shame it would be if... something were to liven it up.

8.39 am

Fun fact!

When a PM's term ends, as their last act in office, they get to present an Honours List. This means they write a list of all the people they reckon have been Jolly Good Sorts who have done Good Clowning and Supported The Community, and nominate those people for honours. Honours here can be anything from an MBE/OBE etc, to a Damehood/Knighthood, all the way up to entering the Peerage i.e. becoming a Lord. Traditionally, people have been fairly reasonable with these lists. Apart from anything else, the outgoing PM can only write the list - the new Prime Minister has to sign off on it, and it's usually the case, of course, that PMs are deposed by the opposition party.

Why am I mentioning this? Well: Boris, you see, has now presented his list to Sunak to validate. You may be unsurprised to learn that it contains quite a lot of clowns.

Another fun fact!

If a sitting MP is given a Peerage, they cannot continue to be an MP. MPs are elected. Lords are not. So an MP offered a lordship right now would have to stand down if they accepted, triggering a by-election in their seat that... well. That anyone could win, couldn't they? Ordinarily. Except Labour's shadow is growing, isn't it? I don't suppose Sunak would be all that happy about losing, for example, any Tory MPs nominated for a peerage right now.

What fun facts.

At 8.39am, Politics UK reveals an as-yet-unverified report that Nadine Dorries and Alok Sharma have been removed from Boris Johnson's honours list, and will go back to vetting.

(They also reveal that Big Dog's dad has been removed from the list, because nominating your dad for a Peerage is "inappropriate". Sorry, Bigger Dog. Apparently even corrupt ghoul Rishi Sunak has a limit to what open corruption he will allow, which is news to us all, most of all Rishi.)

10.41am

Nadine Dorries decides she will play to her strengths, and appear on TV to do some Public Speaking, which always goes well for her of course.

Nothing, let's remember, has been confirmed yet at all. But she's here to put people's minds at ease! No power-hungry status-chasing pink maniac, she! She is very clear in her aims.

“The last thing I would want to do would be to cause a by-election in my constituency.”

Quite right, Nadine. That would be disastrous.

11.20am

Oh, it’s Tory think tank NRG’s conference in Doncaster today.  Gideon George Osborne, pig-stupid former Grand Vizier and idiot fail-heir to David "pig-fucker" Cameron, gives a speech.  Let's see some quotes!

On the Tories’ choices of chancellors since he personally fell on his sword over Brexit left the role:

“You can see when the partnership doesn’t work. The government's paralysed and the politics is terrible.”

Fair, but also you are a government, George.

On Tories who attack the civil service:

“We’re in charge of our country’s destiny. We should stop blaming others if we don’t get things right." 

... right. But you just... Uh.

On Tory culture warriors:

“It’s really important that the Conservative Party is excited about the country we aspire to lead… and doesn’t get in to ‘we’re against all these groups of people’. We’re the inclusive people.”

Well, points for clearing that absurdly low bar, I guess. Christ, I cannot BELIEVE Suella Braverman is making George fucking Osborne look good-by-comparison.

1pm

Ooh. Nadine's attempts to put minds at ease have inexplicably not worked, can't think why not. She's such a reassuring and charismatic speaker normally.

But the rumour is now FLYING about that Nadine has indeed been dropped from the honours list, and specifically because Sunak wants to avoid a by-election that will lose him more seats at a time when he is desperate for even a mat on the floor as long as it's blue.

Sorry, Nads. Still; this morning you were very clear that the constituency comes first, so I suppose that's okay. The priority now is that she MUST stay in position, so the Tories can keep their numbers steady. It is VITAL she remains an MP. Let's remember her exact words!

“The last thing I would want to do would be to cause a by-election in my constituency.”

3.45pm

Nadine Dorries tweets her resignation.

The last thing she does as an MP is indeed to cause a by-election in her constituency.

3.50pm

Except this is Nadine Dorries we're talking about. She's found some flashy balls to juggle, look, and a boy to pour custard down her trousers.

Not five minutes after dropping the bombshell, she deletes the last tweet announcing her resignation, and tweets a new one.

The new tweet says, “it is now time for another to take the reins” as the MP for Mid-Bedfordshire.

The original tweet said, “it is now time for someone younger to take the reins.”

*

On Talk TV, Dorries says that "something significant did happen to change my mind", but doesn’t elaborate.

3.56pm

The whispers are whispering. The rumours are rumouring. The knives are sharpening.

Nadine's now-former seat is Mid-Bedfordshire, and has been Tory since 1929; a safe seat, which certainly explains how Nadine fucking Dorries managed to hold it for as long as she did.

An MP on the right of the Tory party says that if the Tories lose the Mid Bedfordshire by-election, it’ll open questions about Rishi Sunak's leadership CLOWNFALL 3: REVENGE OF BIG DOG LET'S GOOOOOO

3.57pm

Nadine Dorries is removed from the WhatsApp group.

I would love to know who leaked that image. I really should not have that image. Ah well. Now you do too.

4.12pm

Good tweet alert!

5.08pm

Phew! What a day. Let's see how Rishi's getting on.

He approves the rest of BoJo's honours list. Shall we take a look at our newly-honoured citizens? Shall we see what familiar names crop up?

Honours for staff at centre of Partygate Jack Doyle, Rosie Bate-Williams and Shelly Williams-Walker (and a lot of other terrible and disgraced people who were loyal to Johnson, and some of Carrie Antoinette’s friends).

Damehoods for Andrea Jenkyns and Priti Patel.

Knighthoods for Jacob Rees-Mogg, Conor Burns, and Michael Fabricant.

An OBE for Kelly Jo Dodge, Parliamentary hairdresser.

Also honours for Ben Houchen, currently at the heart of a media storm about dodgy property deals.  His huge regeneration project in Teesside is subject to a government investigation regarding the governance, finance and value for money.

*

(Interesting point – Tory MPs Allister Jack and Nigel Adams were offered peerages, but decided to wait, since accepting now would trigger by-elections.

Why were they offered at all, do you think?)

*

So … this means Michael Fabricant is now Sir Michael Fabricant.  Like, actually.  Genuinely.

Nice one, Rishi. Thank goodness you understand AIs.

5.44pm

The Guardian’s Pippa Crerar - journalist who brought down Big Dog one Partygate reveal at a time - tweets her guide to he honours list:

Martin Reynolds, former PPS, invited 200 officials to drinks in Downing St garden.  He told officials to "bring your own booze", later adding: "We seem to have got away with it".

Shelley Williams-Walker, getting a Damehood, was No 10 head of opps & now runs his office.  At No 10 party the night before Prince Philip's funeral she was dubbed "DJ SWW" for her banger playlist.

Jack Doyle & Rosie Bate-Williams, who get OBEs, were press spox who repeatedly denied the parties happened

Dan Rosenfield, who gets a peerage, quit in mass exodus of senior No 10 staff as anger over Partygate grew.  Former chief of staff faced reports he was among senior Downing Street officials who attended a Christmas quiz when restrictions were in place.

Shaun Bailey, who ran unsuccessfully for London mayor, gets a peerage, and Ben Mallett, a close friend of Carrie Antoinette's who ran Zac Goldsmith’s disastrous mayoral campaign, gets an OBE. Both are in this picture of a lockdown-flouting party at CCHQ:

What a sea of punchable faces.

7.58pm

But we've been so focused on Nadine! She's fucked up her juggling, look, but she's sliding around on the rollerskates, ever so distracting. But here's the thing, Tumblrs, here's the thing:

Among all of this, what's the Chief Clown doing?

The Privilege Committee reveals in their draft report that Boris Johnson misled Parliament, and recommends a sanction of more than 10 days.

Does that sound too little? Are you wishing it were smething more meaningful? Let me help put it in context.

This sanction would be enough to trigger a by-election in Johnson’s seat.

8.02pm

Boris Johnson

QUITS

as an MP

The committee said Johson had “impugned the integrity” of the House of Commons. Fascinating! I didn't know its honour had ever been pugned.

He accuses the inquiry of trying to “drive me out”!!!!

"It is very sad to be leaving parliament - at least for now - but above all I am bewildered and appalled that I can be forced out, anti-democratically, by a committee chaired and managed, by Harriet Harman, with such egregious bias".

Worth noting that the committee has a Conservative majority, mind. But you mustn't let things like facts get in the way of your feelings, BlowJo. You never have as a politician. Nor as a journalist, come to that.

(Also SIDE NOTE – “at least for now”??  What are you planning, Big Dog??  I suppose Nadine is leaving an empty seat...)

8.41pm

Christopher Hope of the Daily Telegraph reports he’s heard rumours of a THIRD Tory MP potentially resigning – and another Johnson loyalist at that. Lol. Trololol. Lmao, even. Perhaps rofl.

11.43pm

And finally, the day is wrapped up with the Guardian revealing their front cover for the following day:

Big Dog is OUT, hot trans bloke is IN.

Not a bad finish.

[enhafilthandfiction]

I'm not a Perv, just Crushing on you - Yang Jungwon ☆

A/N : Here is the ask for this post. I love this idea lmao had to turn it into a fic! Tbh it's probably one of my favourite fics 🤭🤭

Summary : Your brother's best friend might seem like a pervert, but he's not. He just likes you a little too much not to look down your shirt. What happens when he gets jealous of a guy you flirted with at your family's get together party?

Pairing : BrothersBestFriend!Junwon X Fem!Reader

Warnings : Shy Jungwon and reader, mentions of Jungwon being slightly pervy, teasing, first shared kiss, Confession from Jungwon, groping, unprotected sex, Jungwon unzipping reader's dress, grinding, slight fingering, cumming inside, slight pillow talk? and hints of another round at the end. Enjoy ;)

Word Count : 2.5K Words

Masterlist

Jungwon didn't expect you to be here. Not at a stupid annual family get together party. He's been forced to attend to this party all these years yet he's never seen you around. How come you're attending now? All of a sudden? Maybe this party wasn't as bad after all.

He eyes you from the distance. You were his best friend's sister, the girl that he happens to have a crush on. The first time he saw you was at your house, the first time he came over to game with your brother. Your older brother, Sunghoon, had mentioned you before, but when Jungwon saw you for the first time- fuck, he wasn't even focused on the game anymore.

You were everything he'd ever dreamed of. Cute and shy with blushed cheeks as you introduced yourself. Voice delicate and soft, eyelashes batting up at him. He knew you were going to be the death of him.

That day he kept getting excuses. "Uh Sung, may I use the restroom?" he had asked, hoping to bump into you in the corridors or something. With the go ahead of your brother, he'd made it out of the room and was left alone to wander, luckily finding your room on his first try.

He was also pretty shy himself, gently opening your door pretending he was lost. "Uh h-hi, I got lost tryna find the bathroom" he blurts out under his breath catching your attention. You look up and smile, getting off your bed and leading him to the bathroom. That's when he thanked you and a little conversation sparked. Who knew that wouldn't be the only conversation between the two of you?

Jungwon knew it was bad. Against the bro-code or whatever. But he didn't care. He had to have you. The next day he was brave enough to text you, easily finding you from your brother's 'following list' on insta. You were delighted as you accepted his follow request and headed to the messages section to find that he'd sent you a message.

From then, he had started hitting on you, hinting his crush on you and trying to get closer but still keeping it lowkey to your brother. All these months he'd kept it all inside of him because he wasn't sure if you fancied him back and feared that you would tell you brother.

You never really seemed to lead him on; until summer. Without no school he started coming over way more than usual. And you started liking him. You've started noticing how cute he looked with messy hair after he's crashed your home couch or how he bit his lower lip in concentration as he tried to beat your brother in Mario Cart.

You started wearing low cut tops around him just to show off your cleavage or shorter shorts just so that your ass hangs out a little. It was driving Jungwon insane. You new it. He would only take one glance at you and look away, cheeks flushed as he swallows.

But he was a slight pervert too. You'd catch him look your way at some point, then look away real quick, hoping you didn't notice. But you did. You have been all along. You were finally understanding all those texts from him. He had been hitting on you.

Which is why now, after hearing you brother say that he's going to meet up with Jungwon at this boring party, you weren't going to miss the opportunity. You put on your favourite dress and put down your hair and got ready for the party. Which is why now

He eyes you from the distance. He notices what you wore and wonders if you wore that dress just for him. He notices your gorgeous smile and he smiles too, until he sees why you're smiling.

Kim Jong-fucking-hoo. That dude from school. He was in Jungwon's class the past years and he's always been a bully. You shouldn't be talking to him. Mainly because you should be talking to Jungwon but also because Jonghoo is a bad influence.

You notice Jungwon from the corner of your eye and as you look to the side you offer him a little smile, only to turn back to the other guy. Jungwon wonders what he should do. He knows you're teasing him by the way you keep glancing at him but he's not sure if he should approach you.

That's until you place your arm on Jonghoo's biceps, laughing about something that wasn't exactly funny. Jungwon looses it. He makes his way over to you both and snatches you away from that jerk.

"She's my girlfriend" is the only excuse Jungwon brings up when the other dude complains when he takes you away. His grip on your hand is strong as he leads you up the strairs, not really sure where he's going.

"Woah woah, slow down Won" he loves it when you call him that. "Where are we going?" you ask, eyes wide "Also, I'm not your girlfriend!". He sighs and walks you into the nearest room he finds which happens to be someone's bedroom. He locks the door behind you two and faces you.

"Why were you teasing me?" he asked you eyebrows furrowed. Before you can say anything he cuts you off "Don't pretend you weren't. You have been all this time. The shirts and the shorts and, and the texts-"

You look down almost in shame but then remember that he's been noticing and looking this whole time. "So you are a little bit perverted huh? If you weren't you wouldn't be looking at my shirts and shorts all the time" you accused crossing your arms.

He sighs to himself and without thinking he just says what he has to say "I'm not a pervert y/n, I just kinda.. like you" he blurts out with difficulty. You almost think he's messing around until he says it again. "I mean, you've probably noticed I've been hitting on you all this time so it shouldn't be a surpris-"

You cut him off, pressing your lips onto his and pushing him up against the wall. Your arms move all over him, making sure it's not a dream. He kisses you back eagerly after he gets over the little shock.

He pulls away for a quick second "Wait, so you like me back?" he ask out of breath. You nod and desperately connect again, your lips on his. This time he places his hands on your hips and flips you, so that you're the one against the wall. You smile into the kiss already enjoying this new side of him.

You place your hands on his biceps and feel how firm they are. Who would've thought that your brother's shy best friend was buff? As your mind started wondering what he could do to you with his strength, he places his hands right below your ass, picking you up.

You wrap your legs around his waist and as if he read your mind, he walks you to the bed. He chuckles as he places you down on it gently, and as you're settling in he takes off his shirt. A new chuckle leaves his lips as he sees you staring, but he doesn't want to embarrass you.

He climbs onto the bed atop of you and decides to kiss you again. During the kiss, he grabs your hand and places it somewhere near his abs. When you pull away for breath he sits up on his knees, your hand still against his abs. "You can touch, you know?" he smiles, loving the way you're so mesmerized by his abs. Guess the gym with Sunghoon was worth it.

You catch him staring at the cleavage of the dress, almost undressing you with his eyes. "Here I'll take it off" you say, offering a little smile. You get off the bed but as you stand you realise you won't be able to reach the zipper yourself.

"Uhh, mind if you unzip me?" you ask shyly, awkwardly waiting for him to unzip your dress. His face brightens at your request. He gets behind you and runs his hands along your back before finding the little zipper, lowering it slowly.

Once unzipped, he places his hands into the dress, around your waist. You let the straps of the dress fall from your shoulders, the garment finally falling to the floor at your ankles.

You let your intrusive thoughts win as you take a step back and angle your ass out, subtly grinding on him. "Fuck" is all he can mumble under his breath before grinding back into you, his hands on your hips, fucking your clothed pussy.

"P-please Won, need you i-inside" you whine. He already felt good clothed, just imagine how he'd feel deep inside you. He obliges, with his hands still on your hips, he turns around, making you rest your hands on the mattress.

With just your hands at the edge of the bed supporting you, you were at his mercy. He leans down, his chest against your back, pecking the back of your neck with little kisses. Then when he actually realises this is about to happen he realises that he doesn't have any rubbers on him.

"Uh y/n, I wasn't really prepared and I uh- I don't have a condom on me" he says shamefully. You just wriggle your ass against him teasingly.

"It's fine, I wanted you to cum inside anyway" you admit, making him curse under his breath. He could've sworn he felt his dick twitch at your statement.

Without thinking twice, he slid down his pants along with his underwear, his cock springing up almost against his abdomen. You couldn't help but turn around to take a look, your gaze making him blush. You were right, a pretty boy must have a pretty cock.

"Shit, you're so big" you compliment "Can't wait to have it in me" you giggle as you notice it twitch. He breathes in, his face feeling too warm. When you turn back around and wriggle your ass again, he knows he shouldn't waste more time.

He presses two of his fingers against your clit circling around before sliding down your lips, rubbing you over your soaked panties. The way you squirm around makes him want more, suddenly sliding your panties to the side so he could really admire your glistening core.

"You're so fucking wet" he curses under his breath when he lets his fingers ghost over your now-bare pussy. And you were wet, drenched actually. You were so wet for him that it felt like you were menstruating or something. But it was only arousal for him.

He experimentally dipped one of his fingers into you, wanting to see how tight you actually were. He sucked in a breath as he realised you're way tighter than he had imagined. Impatient, he pulled his fingers out gently, bringing them to his mouth before sucking them clean.

"You taste so good" he notes, licking your arousal off his fingers. "If I wasn't so desperate to fuck you I'd eat you out right now" but he was too needy at the moment and his dick almost started hurting with neglect.

"Ready?"

"Mhm" you hum back, mentally preparing yourself to finally take your brother's best friend after all this time.

He breathes in as he moves your panties to the side, giving himself a few strokes before pushing his red tip into your entrance. Even that was already big enough for you, already clenching around the little he gave you.

"Stop clenching like that y/n or I'll cum" he warned, not wanting to ruin it for both of you. You tried your best to just relax and take all of him, shutting your eyes tight at the slight sting of him pushing inside.

It's not like you were a virgin or anything, but he was probably the biggest you've ever taken so far. You sigh out in union as he finally stills inside you, letting you adjust to his size a little bit before starting to actually fuck you.

You were making it a little difficult for him to stay still, your cunt squeezing him like it has its own mind. "C-Can I please move?" he asks, hoping you'd give him the green light.

"P-please" you plead, squeezing around him one more time. He grips your hips tightly, starting to fuck into you. His eyes shut tightly as he gets lost in the way you feel. Fuck, this was a million times better than his stupid fist.

"Mm, you, you feel s-so good around me" he stutters in pleasure, the pressure on his dick making it difficult for him to speak. He tried to calm himself down, not wanting to cum too quick and ruin it for the both of you. But with the way you kept squeezing him in, gripping him like a vice, it was almost impossible.

His hips start snapping against yours, the sound of skin slapping echoing in the room for a few moments. "A-ah Won, fucking me so good" you praise, trying your best to speak. He was just so deep in you, and so so close.

He dipped his head forward, lips pressing kissing along your back to the back of your neck, making you moan out for him. You could feel him squeeze your hips as you clenched around him, trying to ground himself.

"Shit Y/n, I-I'm close" he warned, almost embarrassed at how fast he's cumming,

But you weren't so far behind either. "S-same" you manages out, vision hazy as your orgasm approached you. His brows furrowed in focus, picking up his pace a little and chasing his orgasm.

When he felt right at the edge, he placed his fingers on your clit, wanting to cum together. With just a few triggering rubs on your clit, you were clenching around him, your arms giving out as you creamed all over his cock.

With a few more of your squeezes he was cumming too, hot spurts of his release filling you up. All he could do was curse under his breath before pulling out gently and laying beside you breathlessly.

You rolled onto your back, your arms now touching. You had already regained your breath a little, having finished before him. "You okay Won?" you asked, checking up on him. But he wasn't quite back yet. He interlaced his pinky finger to yours to show you that he's heard you, before sighing out.

His eyes suddenly open and he turns to his side, facing you. "How was it? Did you feel good?" he asked, wanting to make sure you're satisfied.

"Amazing actually" you replied, smiling to yourself.

He sighed contently and closed his eyes again until you speak once more. "I can still feel your cum inside me" you mumble, feeling it trickle out of your hole.

"Fuck, don't say things like that or you'll make me pop another boner" he warns.

"Maybe I want that" you smile cheekily. "How about we go shower?" you ask hopefully, an evil grin on your face.

"Oh yeah, I'm definitely going to get another boner"

Thankyou for reading to the end! I hope you enjoyed it :D Have a good day/night and remember that ily! <333

[kamii-2]

NEED A KK SMUT

maybe angst to smut 😳😳

love angst more then life sorry😩😩

ICE TOOOO

I LOVE UR WORK NEED EVERY THING TBH

HI ANON, ASK AND YOU SHALL RECEIVE !!! also sorry if it’s not how you wanted it and i will make a ice smut for you eventually 🫡 AND THANK YOUUUUU 💋💋

warning(s): cussing, smut, fingering, making out, eating out, all the outs (jk), strap (first time writing smut with a strap), edging, etc.

genre: jealousy (idk what to call it) & smut

pairing(s): jealous!kk arnold x fem!reader

not proofread 💦

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kk dragged you out of your bed to come to the party just for her to leave you on the couch in the corner of the room by yourself, people would come over every so often and say hi but that was it.

you were bored so you decided next person to come over that wasn’t kk’s friend you would flirt with them or something to make her jealous. luckily the next person to walk up was your friend, she sat down next to you and started to talk about some funny stuff that just happened. you felt kk staring at you so you cut your friend off to say “im trying to make kk jealous fake flirt with me please.” you whisper in her ear. she nods then puts her hand on your thigh and starts playing with your hair continuing to talk to you.

kk was getting more and more jealous the longer she watched it happen. your friend had started to caress your arms and get really close to your neck and whisper things, kk was thinking the worst but in reality your friend was just talking about how mad kk is gonna be. kk’s last straw was when your friend put her hand on your chest, close to your neck and whispered in your ear, you giggled and put you hand on her thigh. when kk seen this she left her friends without saying anything and walked over to you, grabbing your hand and pulling you away. you look back and your friend and mouthed ‘thank you’ and winked.

“i don’t know who you think you are doing all of that but you need to stop” she warned as she dragged you past her friends and to her car. “what did i do?” you acted confused and tried to hold back a smirk, she glanced over at you and tightened her grip on your hand, “you know what you did bro, stop playing.”

the way she was talking to you and holding your hand made you wet, you knew that she was gonna fuck the life out of you when you got home. when you reached the car she opened the door for you and closed it when you got in. she got in and started the car. you were admiring her as she started to drive, her dreads were in a half up half down type style, her eyebrows were furrowed, he hands were gripping the steering wheel, she looked so hot. her right hand left the steering wheel and moved to your thigh, moving up and down.

her hand was getting closer and closer to your wet pussy, the closer she got the wetter you got. her hand was now under your black skintight dress, she pushed it farther up your thighs and tapped your thigh for consent, even though she’s mad and wanted to fuck you till you were brain dead she still asked just in case you decided you didn’t wanna fuck anymore, you put your hand on hers signaling a yes. she moved your panties to the side and dipped her fingers in you, you threw your head back and moaned. you scooted forward on your seat so she could have better access. she pushed her fingers in and out fast, driving with her other hand. “holy fuck.” you moaned as you were about to finish already. just as you were about to release she removed her fingers, wiping them on your dress and continuing to drive as if nothing happened.

“why’d you do that?” you asked her as you turned your head to face her, “because i can.” she said as you guys pulled into your apartment parking lot. you got out of the car before she could go over and open the door. you grabbed your keys and phone from the cup holder and walked into the apartment building and straight to the elevator with kk following right behind you. you pressed your floor and waited for the elevator doors to close before kk pushed you against the wall and kissed you, one hand on your throat, the other grabbing your boob, she tried to shove her tongue in your mouth but you didn’t let her because the door was about to open. you pulled away and gave her one last kiss before you guys headed to your apartment, as you were unlocking the door kk was caressing your hips and ass, giving it a slap or squeeze.

when you opened the door kk took her shoes off before dragging you to your bedroom, you had one heel on and the other was off on the floor but kk didn’t care.

she pulled you in and pinned you by your hips against the door, she kissed you again and successfully shoved her tongue in your mouth this time. she lifted up your dress again and took off your panties, she dropped to her knees and put her hands under your things and lifted you up against the door and started to eat you out like you were her last meal. you were moaning so loudly and so much that you knew your voice was gonna be gone tomorrow.

she sucked on your clit harshly and kissed it. your legs had started to shake and she put one of your legs on her shoulder and held the other, using her free hand to finger fuck you. this sent you over the edge and cummed all over her fingers, she pulled them out and sucked them clean before she got up from under you and dragged you to the bed, you sat down trying to catch your breath. she grabbed the strap from on your closet floor and took off her shirt and pants, leaving her boxers and sports bra on. she slipped the strap on and walked over to you.

she pushed you back gently and grabbed your hips and lined herself up with your entrance. she purposely pushed in slowly and the further she pushed, the louder you got. “kk, oh, please go faster. i’ll do anything please.” you begged. she listened and went as fast as she could with no warning. you were a moaning mess, the wetness from earlier was spilling out of you onto the strap the more she thrusted. you were so close to cumming after such a short amount of time. “oh, fuck kk, i’m about to cum.” you said.

she somehow manages to go faster than she already was, “hold it.” she demanded. “i can’t.” you cried out, with tears on your face. she rubbed your clit and it sent you over the edge, you couldn’t hold it in anymore.

the overwhelming amount of pleasure made you squirt all on kk’s stomach. she was smiling as she helped you ride out your high. “well, just found out i can turn you into a water fountain off of a fake dick and my hand.” she taunted you as she pulled out. “shut up.” you said with a smirk as you sat up.

kk cleaned herself and you up and you guys went and cuddled and watched movies. kk was staring at you, “what?” you asked her. “you look so gorgeous.” she said while glancing down at your lips. you smiled, “thank you, you too.” you gave her a kiss on the lips then gave her multiple all over her face.

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hey guysssssi hope you enjoyed!! anyway i hope you have a good day/night, love you 💋💋