#it fought me the whole way xoxo

[iinryer]

“the devil gave me a crooked start when he gave me crooked feet”

lyrics from raise hell by brandi carlile

[multimilfs]

Agatha Harkness x Fem!Reader: The Reigning Game, Chapter (5/?) - Vows Made With Sacred Blades

Summary: With a new threat brought to light and victory on the horizon, what will you do next?

AO3

A/N: Not me showing up 3 years late to my own party...

In all seriousness, this story underwent HEAVY edits. I recommend rereading the whole thing as I added scenes and adjusted old ones. Also, I answered a bunch of questions in my end note on a03, so I'd also read that xoxo

Tag List: @white--lillies @escapetodreamworld @multifandomfix @ghostsunderstoodmysoul @imtrashinflames @thatmacrameisnotgonnahitchitself @thoroughly--confused (apologies if i missed anyone, it has been a while)

Warning(s): Blood, Suicide Mention

(Previous Chapters)

“Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away.” P.K. Dick

You don’t remember when Agatha fell to her knees.

The sword catches the light, dripping with thin, bright blood. Agatha’s blood. It startles you that she’s the same inside as you; you had expected corruption to flow through her veins, staining her black from the inside out.

Agatha groans. Barely propped up on her knees, she’s using one hand to support herself while the other glows and fizzles out repeatedly. The sword doesn’t vanish, the wound doesn’t heal.

The wound may not have been by your own hand, but is this… victory? Have you won?

“Coward,” Agatha spits, “stabbing me in the back.”

Your heart races with something strangely like fear, yet a little to the left. With every drop of blood staining the grass the emotion grows. Her winces with every move twist something in you. Revenge is like honey on your tongue—so why do you feel sick?

Let her die.

Lightness sweeps through your limbs. Walking away now would be so easy. It is your turn to have the last word.

“Help me up.” Agatha demands.

Her chest rises, though stutters each time as the pain of her flesh sliding over the blade renews. Under her breath she lets loose a string of obscene curses.

You tilt your head, your own voice sounding far away, “Why should I?”

Agatha freezes. For the first time since falling, she looks at you. You’re struck by the change in circumstances; not long ago it was you kneeling at her feet, begging. You’re seized by the desire to feel her beg.

You want to hold her heart in your hands and squeeze.

“Don’t do this. Not now.”

The laugh comes too easy, “I never took you for a sore loser, Harkness.”

“If you want to win, stab me yourself—don’t profit off of someone else’s fortune.”

You stare at her, hard; the paling of her skin, the way her fingers are clenched in the grass, palm sputtering purple. Her eyes are furious. There’s also something else there you can’t quite place.

“You don’t get it, do you?” You ask, “Being rid of you is winning. How it happens is irrelevant.”

Agatha’s lips pull into a smirk. It lacks the usual strength, but you still find yourself unmoored—fear creeping in where triumph was moments earlier.

Her eyes drag over you. Her own head tilts.

“You’d be beautiful like this—if it was really you.”

You can’t breathe.

“I beg your pardon?”

You stand back—watching, waiting. Her eyes bore into you, the pain in them becoming more evident. You feel sick.

It’s wrong to let her suffer, to watch her bleed out when you can help, but wouldn’t she do the same given the chance? How many battles had you fought, how many thousands cut down just so she could get to you? And she hadn’t allowed you the dignity of dying with your people.

No, she forced you into this circus.

You’re better than her; you’ll grant her the dignity of a swift death.

“You want to be the one responsible, always have.” Agatha says, the hint of a wheeze creeping into her speech. You’re surprised she held out as long as she did. “That’s why you put the poison in my tea, isn’t it?”

She… She knew.

She knew.

“Your death is for the best.” You say.

“She’ll s-slaughter them all. What was it you said—a Queen does what is best, even when it isn’t in her interests?” Agatha laughs, but it's hollow, weak, “Some Queen you are, signing their death warrant.”

You fall to your knees at her side.

Agatha Harkness is the source of all your problems, a tormenter you just cannot escape; but if you kill her now, you undo all you’ve done, and condemn your people to death—or worse. You have to act as a Queen ought. You need her.

“What do I do?” You whisper.

“Get… Get me outside this damn barrier. I’ll handle the rest.”

But hadn’t you already—?

When you stand, you’re barely able to lift Agatha to lean on you. If not for the little remaining strength she has you’d be done for. But you take what you can get and push through the screaming of your body to drag her toward the barrier that wasn’t there a moment ago.

The barrier gleams and twists in place. It's objectively beautiful, but what you’ve witnessed here has dulled your admiration.

You’re steps away when there’s a chuckle on your right, “I have to admit, you surprise me.”

You shove Agatha through before you can think. Without touching the barrier yourself, you turn, and stare into the eyes you’re coming to hate more than the original pair.

The too-wide smile again greets you, “With all that rage I expected you to take my sword and cut her apart.”

“I’m not a monster.”

“Aren’t you?”

“You said I had a fortnight.”

“You do,” She hums, unbothered by your glare, “this is a warning.”

“You think your promises weren’t warning enough? Your intentions were plain.” You snarl.

A distorted, hollow laugh crawls from her mouth, “You know nothing of what I’ll do to you. Your dear, sweet wife went easy on you.”

“You know nothing.”

She had been looking off at some distant marker, only for her head to snap violently to look at you, the crack making you flinch. The once-empty gaze is now full of fury. Behind the blackness, a flame burns bright.

“I know more of her than you’ll ever understand.” She hisses, “And if you were smart, you’d have let her die.”

And she’s gone, as if a product of your imagination.

You reach out and feel yourself pulled back through the barrier.

-- --

“If they never come out of there, what happens?” Darcy whispers.

Lady Darcy always prided herself on an excellent understanding of magic and magical theory; but with every moment spent in the world alongside Agatha Harkness, she grows less sure.

Agatha Harkness is an anomaly; the kind of witch born once in a thousand years. It seems as if magical anomalies follow in her wake, but are they caused by her, or merely drawn out of hiding by her power?

They stand alone in the clearing with their thoughts, Guards and company preparing to take their leave should the two of you return. Hope fades more every moment. 

Lord James looks utterly defeated, “I… I don’t know. They’ve left no heir.”

“Which means The Council will appoint one.”

A look of dread passes between the two.

“We can’t let that happen.”

“How are we going to stop them?” Darcy raises a brow.

Lord James Woo spent his life serving at your side, and proudly; you’ve held tight to propriety, unbent by corruption, guiding with level-headed and clear intent. The tactics in his mind now would never have your approval.

But if you’re dead, he has to look out for the living.

“We lie.”

Darcy blinks.

“I’m sorry, I don’t think I heard you properly. We lie?” She hisses.

“What else do you suggest?!”

“Oh, I don’t know, something less stupid!”

James winces.

“We say she appointed an heir prior to… this. Agatha didn’t sign off, but she didn’t speak against it, either. You and I were both witnesses.”

Pacing the small length between them, chewing on her nail, scenarios pass through both of their minds. Scenario one; somehow, the Council accepts the word as fact. Scenario two; they’re disbelieved and exiled at best, executed at worst.

You find lying reprehensible. But your goal has always been to protect the people, to offer them the best; they have to try and do the same.

“Say they buy it; who is her heir?”

The look the question earns her is particularly scathing for James. She smiles sheepishly.

Only one within the kingdom held enough of your trust to be named heir in your place. Only one person you knew would hold up under the weight of expectation and would keep the best interests of the people in mind.

The set up could not be more perfect if they tried. Not only is the woman of royal blood, but her Mother’s House widely acclaimed for their military and strategic prowess. Factor in her closeness to you and it makes the nomination impossible to ignore; far stronger than the minor Lord they would put in her place.

“Alright,” Darcy agrees, “but we’ll give them all the time we can.”

“Right.”

Luckily, or unluckily, they do not wait long.

One moment the space before them is empty, the next there is a heap of woman kneeling on the ground, propped up by a shaking arm. A heap with dark hair and clad in purple.

“Foolish fucking woman.” Agatha bites out loud enough for them to hear.

Darcy notices the sword moments before Agatha straightens, pushing said item out of her body with a long moan. James freezes. Darcy shrieks.

Agatha pays them no mind; slamming her hand onto the barrier that doesn’t allow her to pass, magic crackling at her fingertips and then pulling in, wrapping around the witch as she breathes it in. The wound in her middle knits itself back together before their eyes.

The barrier ripples. You blip into existence.

There is a split second where you blink and make eye contact with Darcy and James. The next, your eyes are drawn to the swirl of magic being pulled from the barrier and turning violet.

“Are you alright?” You demand, gripping her arm, turning her to face you as your eyes roam. Your body screams with exhaustion.

Agatha goes taut. Her theft stops when she turns to glare at you. When her lips pull up in a mighty sneer, you expect the lashing of a century; you had been seconds away from leaving her for dead, after all.

Her body relaxes in your grip, her voice careful, “I’m fine, dear.”

“Swear it?”

“I swear.”

Something inside you relaxes. You’ll live to see another day if she is near to lend her power—and well enough to do so. Your people’s safety is nearly assured.

How, though, to secure a promise of protection from her that isn’t all talk? You can’t bind a witch like her to law, try as you might. She will always have the upper hand of immeasurable power. You need that power bent to your will.

An itch scratches at the back of your mind; a memory long forgotten, a whisper of words once-said that you can’t quite understand.

“What the hell happened in there?!”

Darcy’s voice interrupts your racing thoughts. You hear the borderline panic in the question.

How heavy you feel, how weary. What about you attracts so many threats?

Agatha speaks before you can, “A new adversary has presented itself.”

“And they’re responsible for all… this?” James waves to the barrier.

“More or less.”

A look passes between Darcy and James.

“They’ve given us fourteen days to prepare, as if we need that long,” Agatha scoffs, breezing through, “but you’ll stay here and tell us of any changes. You have ravens?”

“We send word on horseback.” Darcy answers, slowly.

“Horseback? My god, how do you get anything done?”

With a wave of her hand, a metal cage appears with five ravens inside. They’re curiously quiet. Beady eyes look into yours, far more intelligence behind them than you anticipate. Their feathers shift violet in the sun but remain pure black otherwise.

Your Father seldom had the patience for training ravens; though he had attempted on and off throughout your childhood. The experience was rife with highs and lows. He would boast to your Mother, glowing with triumph one day, only to come back sullen the next. Every raven he attempted to train had flown away when it mattered.

Not for the first time, you wonder what had gone wrong; you did not know any creature that would flee permanently if endeared to their owner.

Agatha opens the cage door and holds out a finger. The nearest one steps up, though the others hop forward to nuzzle at her hand.

“Yes, hello,” Agatha coos.

Hand extracted, raven perched obediently on her finger, Agatha sets her shoulders. An air of arrogance surrounds her. She waves her other hand and a blank piece of parchment appears in the space between you.

“Write me a lovely note, darling, and I’ll show you all how to send it.” Agatha’s smile is saccharine.

“Would that I had a quill.”

“You know how to use your fingers, don’t you?”

The low, raspy note of her voice makes you flush.

You draft up a suitably nasty message and sign it with a flourish. Batting your lashes, you fold the letter, and go so far as to press a kiss to the back before handing it over. She smirks.

The kiss on the back raises into a wax seal. Agatha winks.

She beckons you forward with an impatient tilt of her head. You follow, stepping further into her space than you're comfortable with.

“Hold out your hand,” She commands and you do, mimicking her own position, “Repeat after me—Serva.”

“Serva.”

You don’t expect the raven to launch herself from Agatha’s fingers into flight; but when she does, you’re helpless to do anything but watch as she flips and twists in midair. Beside you, Agatha mutters something about showing off.

When the bird pauses and hovers, there is a flash of white light, and the letter is gone from your hands and tied instead around her leg.

Agatha scoffs, “Obedire.”

“Obedire.”

A strong burst of movement brings her back to perch on Agatha, head bowed. You tilt your head. Agatha strokes a finger over the back of the raven's head, scratching lightly.

“To the castle.”

A warble and she’s off, flying North with single-minded focus.

There’s a certain wistfulness in watching her go. What must it be like to fly, to have the freedom of the world laid out before you? Yet, she isn’t truly free; remaining captive to a Mistress who only lets her take to the skies when it suits her. How alike the two of you are.

James is staring at the still-caged ravens. One of his fingers is stuck through the bars and scratching along the raven’s head in a mirror of Agatha. It warbles, shifting closer, but doesn’t take its eyes off of its Mistress.

“It can’t be that easy.” Darcy says, arms crossed.

“Ravens are far more intelligent than horses,” Agatha shrugs, “and easier to care for. Treat them properly and they’ll do whatever you command.”

“They’re so sweet.” James coos, earning affectionate noises from the group, “Oh yes you are.”

One bird has remained on the other side of the cage away from James. Their eyes aren’t wary like you’d expect, just… curious. They sparkle with awareness.

Faintly, you hear Darcy and Agatha bickering over the merits of horses vs ravens, but you pay them little mind. You cross around the large cage to where the lone raven sits. They follow your approach.

You crouch to be eye level. The raven tilts their head.

“Hello,” You murmur, “what are you doing over here all alone?”

As expected they do not talk back. They don’t even warble. Fluttering their wings, you wait for them to cross around to another section of the enclosure blissfully absent of people. Yet, their wings settle and they bow their head.

The pose offers you a closer view under their plumage. You can see the true length of their dark feathers, where they come to connect to hidden flesh. A white protrusion among the plumage brings you pause.

Every glimpse of your Father’s ravens had been from afar; seeing them fly around his office and listening to his curses when they didn’t land at his command, or catching sight of one when they escaped their enclosure and dove through the nearest window. You’re left at a loss when faced with the trust being presented.

Would it be worth attempting to help, or will you only cause harm in your ignorance?

“A pin feather,” Agatha says right beside your ear.

You jump.

Agatha is bent next to your crouched form, propped up by one hand on the trunk where the cage sits. The position puts her face just slightly above your own. When you turn, your eyes unconsciously dart to her lips, before meeting her eyes.

The look on her face is curious. She’s taking you in like one takes in a specimen they’re studying.

“How do I fix it?”

“Pinch gently and roll it between your fingers.”

When you reach in, the raven bows her head again. She is utterly still as you follow Agatha’s instructions to the letter. Her head pops up and shakes—the white covering falling away. She nuzzles your hand sweetly.

“Say ‘thank you,’ Aquila.” Agatha says.

Aquila lets out a sound that is remarkably similar to thank you. You blink.

When you regard Agatha, you catch a glimpse of the expression leveled at Aquila and the other ravens; pure, uninterrupted affection. The emotion softens her features, eyes crinkled at the edges, lips upturned. Her beauty is striking.

Darcy and James watch from your periphery. You shake yourself from the trance you’re in.

“We should go.” You say, hushed.

Agatha turns, looking over your features, and nods. She straightens and offers out a hand. You take it. In a swift turn, she weaves your arm over her own, acting the part of lead. 

Her face is neutral, but beneath her gaze, your companions fidget and shift.

“If you return my ravens in any state less than what they’re in now, I will torture you slowly.” The statement is punctuated by a raised brow.

“We—We’ll take good care of them.” James vows.

Agatha nods. She regards you, waiting.

“Be careful. Send a letter if anything changes, but don’t go searching for anomalies—am I understood?”

Darcy nods. A haunted look passes over James’ face, dimming the usual light in his eyes. Without so much as a glance to his companion he steps forward.

“Your Majesty, may I have a word with you privately?”

You blink, grip on Agatha’s arm tensing unconsciously.

“Of course.”

Agatha releases you with a sideways glance. You focus on your advisor and friend, who at the moment resembles a wilted flower. Grim is the expression he wears; an expression you haven’t seen in a long time.

He leads you until you stand at his side under a half-blackened tree. The bark on one side is perfect, not a divot out of place, while the other side crumbles at a glance. You run your fingers along the dying side and wish for it to one day grow strong again.

Looking back, you see Agatha and Darcy side-by-side, both pointedly ignoring one another; Agatha reading a book without actually handling the pages and Darcy looking around, lips puckered in a whistle.

“Is something wrong, James?” You ask when he comes to a stop.

He fidgets. Meeting your eyes, he gives you a long look. Tilting your head makes him look away. He clears his throat once, then twice.

“Your Majesty, I— Well, you see, we—” James sighs, then blurts, “Have you given any thought to an heir?”

You blink.

“I beg your pardon?”

“Marriages usually bring about heirs to fill the succession, Your Majesty, and with another conflict seeming imminent I believe having something in place is worthwhile. Has there been a discussion between you and your—Her Highness?”

“I’m familiar with the expectations of marriage,” If your voice is a touch frosty, you don’t give it much attention, “and I don’t much appreciate that the topic of conversation in private parlors pertains to my marriage bed.”

“Your Majesty—”

“What is it you suggest, James? Am I to bring a child into what could turn out to be another war?” You snarl.

James flinches. Upon seeing this, regret turns a knife in your chest.

“No,” He says, quietly, “You know I’d never suggest such a thing.”

Anger is rung out of you like water from a towel, you ask, carefully, “What would you suggest I do?”

“Appoint a successor. If you do it, The Council can’t do it for you should you…”

You nod.

“I will consider it.”

“Safe travels, Your Majesty.”

When you walk from the half-dying tree, you walk alone to the carriage. Along the way Agatha falls into step at your side. You cannot find the energy to hate her company.

-- --

You had been a precocious child; at only six, testing the might of your station against the will of those left to care for you. As Crown Princess, your commands had superseded that of your minders the second you drew breath. Once or twice you’d felt guilty about how Celine—your governess—would puff up, only to deflate and bow with a ‘yes, Princess’—but the guilt was washed away by the incentive of whatever you’d wormed your way into.

By seven, your Father had been made wise to your behavior; though you could never figure out how; you had long since commanded all your minders not to speak a word of your commands. But he knew and sought to punish you in a manner that made a lasting impression.

He let you sit in silence.

Silence, he had said, was the best teacher. One cannot ignore their innermost self if they’re forced to face them.

The room he had the servants make up was plain; boasting only a cushioned chair in the center of the space. You were not permitted to drag said chair over to the window. The task of sitting with your thoughts was as simple as the room, and far more boring.

Guards were posted outside the door to see you were not disturbed or harmed. No servants were allowed in otherwise.

You’d thought him a silly old man. In the absence of distractions you had your wild, adventuring mind to keep you busy—you would not fall into whatever trap he believed he’d set.

But two hours turned into four and your head ached with the effort of conjuring up more daydreams. Then you slept. When you woke, there was no more sunlight, and your head no longer hurt. You imagined you were a bird flying through the window and laughing in your Father’s face. It did not satisfy you. You paced the room, then sat back down, then paced again. Despite having rested, your body began to ache with exhaustion and the pain in your head from before returned.

“I hate him.” You’d whispered, then immediately regretted it.

For how busy he was, he still found a sliver of time each week to see you. Sometimes it was something quick like sitting in on one of your lessons, or, on special occasions he’d join you and your Mother for dinner. For how harsh he could be at times, you’d never been anything but excited when he walked in the room. 

The guilt at the words spoken to yourself prompted your mind to spiral. How else had you been cruel, spewing awful words where it was not deserved?

You had been unkind, you’d realized. By commanding the servants in ways you had no right to, you had opened them up to punishments of which they were undeserving. Above all else, you were still a Princess; not yet of the right to command in the ways your Father did.

Guilt was a powerful emotion. And when your governess was permitted to peer in, she found you on the floor before the seat you’d been allowed, knees to chest, shaking with tears.

The moments following had been a blur. You think Celine had tried to usher you to your feet, but it’s a missing piece; all you remember is being carried from the room and falling asleep, waking to your Father standing above you.

“You’ve learned your lesson?”

You nodded.

“Good,” He offered a stilted pat to your head, “Do not forget it.”

The guilt had made you sick for the remainder of the week; everything you ate, save for the smallest portions, found the way back up. Celine was one of your only visitors, with the exception of your Mother and your teachers.

Your Father had been right in the end; silence had been your greatest educator.

You wish you were alone with the silence now, but as of late, everywhere and everything is touched by Agatha. She sits on the other carriage bench, book held magically aloft as she reads.

To say you’ve been through a lot in a day would be selling your experiences short; yet your mind keeps returning to the blood on that sword and the sickening pride of knowing she had no way out. You had, for a moment, tasted victory—revenge. And now you close your eyes against the nausea it brings. How close you’d come to condemning your people, all to satisfy your sickening desire.

She had remembered your goal; but was it only to manipulate you into keeping her alive? In her words there had been a subtle promise of usefulness, of protection. Subtle isn’t what you need.

You’ve no idea how long Agatha’s been alive. The true weight of her power is a mystery to you that you’re not likely to solve alone. Her peers could judge her power, but would any come if you called? You need to bind her power to what serves your people but short of a Witch’s Vow there’s nothing—

A Witch’s Vow.

The forgotten thought itching at the back of your mind is realized. You thrum with satisfaction.

“You made a promise today, to help my people—I want you to swear on it.”

Agatha gazes up, a lazy smile stretching, “Very well, dear. I swear.”

“Make a Witch’s Vow over it.”

She goes still. The smile vanishes and something passes through her eyes. The book that levitates before her dissipates in a pop.

“And if I don’t?”

“You will.”

“Demanding a Witch’s Vow does not bind me to one.”

“It would protect you.”

“Protect me?” Agatha scoffs.

“You make this vow to me and I’ll pause my attempts in killing you.”

“I’m not afraid of you, dear.”

“Maybe not, but I’m sure you’re afraid of her.” You say, tilting your head. A smug smile stretches over your features, “And what’s to stop her from coming after you again, should I ask?”

“Your shortsightedness is embarrassing, darling, I thought we were past this; if I die, you and your people follow.”

“Given your unwillingness to swear aid, it seems we’ll die either way. I’m simply planning for the outcome with the greatest reward.”

You watch her, she watches you. Her narrowed eyes dart over various planes of your face and for once you have no desire to shrink under the scrutiny. Had she wanted to kill you, you’re confident she’d have done so already; no, she wants you alive, and that can be used to your advantage.

Her eyes glow purple and hands clench in her skirts. Agatha sighs and her eyes return to their normal blue.

“You’re as open a book as they come, it’s a wonder she even needed into your mind.” Agatha rolls her eyes, “We need to work on that.”

You tuck your curiosity away for later, “Will you make the Vow or not?”

“Yes, yes, I’ll make your silly vow. Name your terms.”

“I want you and your magic sworn to the service of the kingdom—and that you will not act against it over the duration of our agreement.”

“No. New terms.”

“Those are my terms.”

“Swearing my magic to the service of your kingdom restricts my use of it for any other purpose. I’m not wasting my time on the same trick.”

“It wouldn’t be forever. You’re only bound until I dissolve the agreement.”

She leans forward, baring her teeth, blackened hands stopping just short of grabbing you. Her nails seem longer, sharper. Should she grab you, you fear for the damage they’d wreak on your flesh.

“I know your manipulative little mind, darling, and I won’t let you chain me to your kingdom until it no longer pleases you.” Agatha snarls, “New. terms.”

Despite the show of force, that sense of calm remains. You see the heart of her, the fear swimming in her eyes over the idea of being chained, restricted. Powerless. Does the fear of losing her own power fuel her joy at taking your own?

You should feel offended that she thinks so little of you—never have you desired to chain someone, to bind them—but the better side of you seldom interacts with her. The idea of her in chains pleases you. You shift as that pleasure makes itself known at the apex of your thighs.

“During the duration of our deal, you’ll act in the best interests of the kingdom. If there are threats, you’ll do what you can to handle them; and if there are people in need, you’ll lend your power to aid them.”

Agatha regards you thoughtfully, “No little clause about not killing you?”

“My death serves no benefit to my people.”

Her eyebrows raise. With a shake of her head she holds out her hand, palm up. You mimic the action.

An artful flick of her fingers and a wisp of violet summon an ornate dagger into her open hand. The hilt is short, silver wrapped in indigo briars that while appearing sharp don’t seem to mar Agatha’s hand. A blade of black metal extends from it, curving to-and-fro, until sharpening to an intense point.

You wince at the sight of it, “Can you not… use magic?”

“You want a sacred Vow, don't you?” Agatha scoffs, “There’s no Vow more sacred than that made with a Coven Blade.”

“You don’t have a coven.”

Agatha scowls, “I am aware. It was inherited.”

“From who?”

“My Mother.”

“If it belongs to her coven, shouldn’t one of her fellowship have it?”

“They would,” She says, turning and holding the blade point-down above her palm, “if they weren’t all dead.”

Without so much as a wince, she carves an X in the center of her palm, flesh parting cleanly. Blood pools in her hand.

“Oh.”

She moves so fast you don’t know to anticipate the pain until it blossoms up your arm. Looking down, you wear a matching X, complete with the ever-growing pool of blood.

Agatha presses her palm to the top of your forearm, just below where it meets the elbow. Blood seeps between her fingers and around the curve of your arm.

“I, Agatha Harkness, swear upon my blood and gifts, that I will act in the best interests of your kingdom. I will destroy any entity that threatens these interests and lend my power to those within your borders that require its support.” As she speaks, she drags her hand down the length of your forearm, leaving a smear of red in its wake. When she clasps your palms together, she looks at you, magic swirling in her eyes, “This is my Vow to you.”

Upon the final word, lavender flame erupts down the length of your arm and her own, burning away the blood left behind. It moves and wedges its way between your interlocked palms. The light that emits, violet and white and so bright it burns, forcing your eyes closed. The flesh of your palm is mended as if nothing happened.

Agatha’s palm still bears the X, though healed.

“So I don’t forget.” She winks.

“If you did, what would happen?”

“For something small, maybe a little zap, some exhaustion.” Agatha shrugs, “Something large… I’m sure the punishment would fit the crime. Eager to see me tortured, are you?”

You do your best to ignore the salacious grin.

“I want to be sure you won’t get off easy, that’s all.”

“Getting off is plenty easy with the right help.”

The roll of your eyes doesn’t hide the blush creeping up your cheeks. She cackles at the sight. You don’t attempt to muster a glare, convinced it would only amuse her further.

“What is your plan for protecting the borders?”

Her eyes still twinkle with amusement. You’re not sure what is so funny.

“Protecting the borders is a little difficult since she’s within them, dear, but I can exclude that section from my wards if it pleases you.”

“How?”

“We do not have time for you to learn the basics of casting.”

“Fine,” You sigh, “but I want the wards handled discreetly.”

“I’m not all explosions and smoke-clouds—that was only to get your attention.” She smirks.

“Is everything a joke to you?”

“Yes.”

Villages faced with the might of Agatha’s forces had once chosen between fighting or fleeing. Though some had made a third choice; hanging themselves from rafters at the whisper of impending invasion.

Monica had gone to pay respects in your place, once. When she returned, she had requested three days leave. The look in her eye she returned with has never gone away.

It’s been weeks since the threat of Agatha was settled; what would the people do if they caught wind of another war on the horizon?

Agatha sighs, as if reading the thoughts on your face, “I will be discreet. Best interests of the kingdom, remember?”

“I want to go with you.”

“That is the opposite of discreet.”

“We’ll go under the cover of night—”

“I know you’re woefully uneducated in the ways of witchcraft, but the weight of transporting two beings and setting wards of the size we’ll require? Too much, even for me.”

“There has to be a way. Please.”

The hard lines of her face soften just so. Her blue eyes are contemplative, seeing more than you would like.

“Two of the sites are on our way. The others I’ll handle alone—a sudden tour of the borders might raise a few suspicions.” 

You deflate. Something within you that had once been ready to argue turns to liquid, slithering around your heart, tugging on all the little strings that make your eyes water.

“Thank you.” You say. 

“Don’t thank me yet.”

[chaptersleftunwritten]

Hi! I would love to see Billy Hargrove and #37 👀❤️ Maybe also a secret relationship? I love your writing!

(37. Public sex) This had me going feral! Enjoy, lovie xoxo

Warnings: basically just smut. NSFW

It was a Saturday night out at the cocktail club on the high street and you had arrived on Nancy’s arm. Two intelligent and strong independent women— or so you led everyone to believe.

The bare truth was that you and Billy had been seeing one another secretly for a few months now. It was this exciting game you liked to play with one another; who could resist the other the longest? And how much could you drive the other insane?

You found ways to tease and toy with Billy’s emotions. You knew exactly what to do to earn his attention and Billy was often shameless with how he eyed you. It was as if he had been starving for days and you were a whole banquet of the most delicate and exquisite foods. He couldn’t wait to devour you.

And you made it all too easy for him. The short dress you had chosen for the evening barely covered your ass and it granted Billy smooth access to your pantie clad core beneath the dinner table.

His dark lustrous gaze drank in your facial expressions as you bit down your bottom lip hard enough to possibly draw blood; luckily your red lipstick would campflauge that if it were to happen.

You were already so wet for him, your lace panties damp with arousal as he skilfully pulled them to the side and plunged his fingers deep inside of your aching hole, thrusting his two digits softly and revelling in how your eyebrows frowned together in frustrated concentration as you fought to keep your pleasure hidden from your friends.

“Are you alright? Was the food not any good?” Nancy peers down at your empty in complete confusion before her eyes rest on your strained features. You looked as though you were in pain, but really, you were just in heaven.

“She loved it, didn’t you? Must’ve tasted so good for the plate to be clear, right?” Billy mocks you with his tone, a concealed teasing that only you were familiar with as his fingers twitch and curl into you, stretching you out so well that your lips almost elicit a moan and the sound of your wetness threatens to meet uneasy ears.

“Y-yep. It was so so good…” You choke down a whimper and decide to take a swig of water from the glass you had perched on the table. Billy lifts a forkful of chicken from his plate and places it onto his tongue casually, like he isn’t finger fucking you beneath the table cloth.

Nancy hums in approval and turns her attention back to her glass of wine which she necks back quickly before waving a waitress over for a refill. It was her third glass of the night and you were hoping she would be drunk enough to totally overlook the way your hips were swirling and bucking down onto the leather booth seat beneath you.

“Soaking my fingers, pet,” Billy’s voice is low and husky as he whispers slyly into the shell of your ear, his lips brushing your skin and setting your body alight, “Can’t wait to fill your sweet pussy with my cock later. I bet you’re so excited, hmm? Dirty fucking girl.” His thumb finds your clit and your eyes roll involuntarily to the back of your skull, forcing your eyes to pinch closed as you chase your high against the palm of Billy’s large palm that is massaging against you in such an intoxicating way, “Cum for me, slut. Cum all over my fingers in front of our friends.”

And as Billy’s teeth gnaw on the flesh of your earlobe you feel your thighs tremble against the leather seat beneath you and your hips buck mercilessly as your orgasm washes over you like a tidal wave; causing your thighs to clench around Billy’s wrist and lock his fingers inside of you as you pulse hungrily around his long meaty digits.

“Good girl,” He purrs reassuringly into your ear, his fingers still sliding slowly in and out of you, “I can’t wait to see how fun this night is about to get.”

[justlemmeadoreyou]

Unfulfilled

Ok so this was something I wrote a month ago, a simple idea that just popped up in my head. I kinda wanted to make this a series, and I still have the whole story, but I didn't think you all would like it, so tell me if you do! xoxo

Word Count: 1.1k

Warnings: fluff, cursing

Pairing: nerd!harry x nerd!reader

YN was stressed.

She had a physics exam tomorrow, and the constant flaunting by Harry wasn’t helping.

“I’ve revised thrice. And I am solving previous years’ papers for like, 2 hours now. I still don’t get this.” He sighed, listing up a plethora of achievements that YN was nowhere near.

“Yeah, yeah. I get it. You’ve finished the syllabus and are way ahead of me. I am far behind and you’re solving questions. Happy?” YN replied, head pounding from the strain in her eyes.

“What? No! Who said I was listing all the things I’ve already done? And that you’re way behind?” He smirked, and she wanted to smack his face.

“Shut up” she finally said to him, and he started to pout.

“Hey, I was just teasing. Do you want me to help you?” he asked, now feeling a bit guilty.

“No, I’ll do it myself. I just feel a bit stressed.” you replied, placing a hand over your head.

“Let’s go for some coffee. I’ll get you a muffin too” he offered, and who were you to refuse free coffee?

“Sure” you smiled, and he dragged both of your chairs out, pushing them back in after you got up. You exited the library and he followed behind.

“You know you don’t have to worry so much. You’ve studied. I know you have.” he smiled reassuringly, and you could feel some of the tension slipping away, looking at his ridiculously cute dimples.

“Thank you. You are the only person who would say that and I would actually believe it.”

You entered the small cafe, ordering two decafs. You drank it on the way, and went back to studying at the library.

You and Harry were academic rivals, for as long as you can recall. Since high school to senior year, and then here you were attending the same grad school.

Here too, you fought like children. The competition was a bit tougher now, though, since you both wanted to get good placements, and keeping constant 9+ cgpa was a tough task.

Nevertheless, you had become friends.

Good friends, actually. You both gave the valedictorian speech together, and you had to spend a lot of time with him for it. It was then that you realized that he was not so bad after all.

He was quite caring. He constantly checked in on those around him, making sure they were okay, and letting them know that he was there for them. Even right now, he would make you drink water, shared his food with you, and gave you a head massage. He took you for coffee, so that you would get up from the depressing library and get some fresh air, before going back and diving back in.

He was quite balanced too. He was extremely good at studies, and managed everything else along with it.

Everything, which was almost annoying.

He went for a run every morning around the uni, and was ridiculously fit. He was tall, and had great hair. He played occasional basketball too, and there was a plethora of girls who attended the game just to watch him get hit in the balls with the basketball.

He would go to parties too, unlike you, who preferred to stay in and burn your eyes out on a new movie on your laptop. He drank beers, and looked better than you in the morning.

He was so perfect.

How did he manage to do that?

>>>

The exam day had arrived. You had been biting your nails since morning, and had to stop before you drew out blood and had trouble writing. He sent you texts throughout the morning, wishing you luck and encouraging you.

“Love, you’ll do well”

“Yeah, but not as well as you. How many times have you revised now?”

“Four. But-It dosen’t matter!”

“Yeah. Right.”

As if a stressed-and-not-even-revised-once head could compare to a i-revised-five-times one.

Turns out, it did.

On the day of the result, you had managed to bite through your skin, and drew out blood. Your roommate, Lizzy, had put band-aids on each finger, and scolded you for doing it. She wanted to tie your hands to the side even, so they won’t reach your vampire teeth.

As the professor was handing out the papers, you felt nervous. Everything you had written in the paper was coming back to you like an attack, and making you think you had done everything wrong.

Meanwhile, Harry was relaxed.

So relaxed.

He had his arms behind his head, and was leaning on to the backrest, looking like he owned the world. You did not anticipate the change in expression when he saw his score.

“What-?” you could hear the surprise in his shreik, and he pouted like a baby when the professor shushed him.

He was looking at the paper like it wasn’t his own, and as if he had been somehow betrayed.

You managed to walk down to his sheet while the rpof was distributing them to the last benches, and quickly grabbed his sheet to see his score.

“95. Are you mad?”

“Just 95”

He groaned and frowned, trying to take your sheet and see the score.

“What did you get?”

“Oh. I didn’t see” you were so engrossed in his score that you hadn’t even taken a glance at your own paper.

You pulled out your sheet, and glanced at the big red circle.

98

Holy shit.

“What the-” you stopped mid-sentence, and your expression now matched Harry’s.

“Fuckin’ hell” he snatched the paper from your hands, and frantically started to go through each question. Every question of yours matched his, except one. It was a 3 marker, and you had gotten it right.

“I solved this in like, 30 seconds. It’s ridiculous-” he held the paper up, reading the question, “-Is it easier to pull, or push?” he put it down, and said “ Pull. Obviously.”

“That’s not true. It actually depends on the situation. Plus, you had to give an example.”

“What did you write?”

“It depends on the situation. If you were to move a lawn mover, pull would be easy. If you were moving an almirah, push would be easy.”

“Shit” he looked sad and confused, and to be honest, you felt bad for him.

“I can’t believe you got more than me.”

“Yeah. Suck on it, Styles’”

“Hey! I helped you!”

“Well, you couldn’t even answer a push n’ pull question. Next time, I’ll help you” you couldn’t stop the big smirk that stayed on your face throughout the class.

And honestly, even Harry couldn’t stop the warm glow spreading across his face from seeing you happy.

(next part)

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[sdwolfpup]

I just finished reading HFoG and oh. Oh. My. God. I need to rant (you can totally ignore this if you'd like).

First of all, the scenario you've created fits them so well. Brienne as a mechanic is an amazing idea. She's still doing something stereotipically male (and kicking ass) at best unnoticed and at worst cast aside as no one takes her seriously or they outright mock her. You've kept her under patriarchy's thumb, and also as a powerful, simmering force waiting for someone to turn up that heat!! What an excellent mirror to her situation in the books.

Second: the extremely high risks + high adrenaline + mightily physically demanding + high rewards of F1 is another excellent transposition of their survival/quest situation in the books. I feel like that, as a setting, is what makes it feel very genuine to them as characters. Your characterization is great too! They're slightly different to the books but still familiar (they would probably act like this in this more modern, more subtle flavour of a patriarchal society). I mean. just. Man. MAN.

Also, turning a bit more to Jaime: The way all the events unfold was incredible. We go steady, quite calm but with an undercurrent of stress and anxiety, building, some doubts, triumphs, more building, more triumphs and then BAM. The dreaded doldrums where we pick up the pieces of a horrible shipwreck. Jaime never getting to that P-1 absolutely broke me. I literally held my breath reading those paragraphs, where time stops for the whole circuit after the crash, and the heavy moment of silence before Brienne hears him over the radio... MAN. I thought you were going to give him at least one P-1 before he lost his hand, making it bitersweet already at that point, and when you didn't I was SCHOCKED. You held back on that element and it worked WONDERFULLY towards the end. JB'S P-1 felt so earned, so fought for. Talk about good storytelling. AAAAHHH!!!!!

I ate it up between yesterday night and all of today. I slept at most, like, four hours. I couldn't stop reading. Congratulations, honestly. I usually don't read fics this long (or leave reviews this crazy under anonimity lol) because authors tend to meander (not a bad thing necessarily but it does get tedious at this scale) but this was SO not the case. Every. single. paragraph. mattered. MAN!!!!! (man counter: IIII)

I know you're probably quite done with it (and what a fucking project you did, my god), but if you ever want to write about JB in that universe again I see myself forced to BEG YOU ON MY KNEES to do more of their radio banter in your missing scenes section. I absolutely love it, the subtle flirting, the encouragement, and the oopsies (Jaime forgetting to turn the radio off and accidentally exposing himself as a I LOVE MY CAR MY CAR IS MY GF guy is soooooo funny). Ugh. Swooning. It has started an itch I need to scratch so bad (I feel like im going crazy a bit ngl. Give yourself a big smacking pat in the back.) that I'm just going to start re-reading it for those parts and also to get that thrill that is there between them at the beginning which is also so good! And so yummy!!!!!

Ok im done now i think.

TLDR: xoxo mwah mwah mwah i loved HFoG i worship and kiss the ground you walk on, etc etc etc. im obsessed, great job!!

"ignore this"?! Are you kidding, anon -- I'm gonna print this out and wallpaper my bedroom with it. 😂💕

I have been re-reading this ask off and on all day, wanting to respond appropriately to make sure you know how much I so sincerely appreciate you taking the time to leave this for me, and I just don't know if it's possible. I'm just... man, I'm grateful. (Man count for this post going up!!!) Seriously though: thank you, thank you, thank you. I'm gonna be riding this high all week.

(Also, I fought with myself about allowing Jaime to win the World Driver Championship and then lose his hand, so I'm always glad to hear that that choice worked for others. It was the right thing to do, but wow did that hurt to put him through it, heh. And pacing of long fics is a thing I take very personally, so I am ALSO pleased to know that worked for you, too!)

Anyway. THANK YOU. I'm gonna go back to re-reading this comment, hee.

[a-slut-for-smut]

The Confession

After a few drinks, Gojo is drunk.  Very drunk.  Courage courses through his veins, a foreign and unfamiliar a substance as the alcohol was- as what use was courage to the World’s Strongest Sorcerer, the Honored One, the sole heir to the all powerful Six Eyes and Limitless techniques?

*****************

He turned his gaze on the source of his trepidation as she sipped her drink, seemingly oblivious to his inner tribulations.  They were sitting next to each other, practically touching, and while he went to great lengths to never have it activated around her, there was no denying the infinity between them. 

The irony was not lost on him. The torture of harboring such an immense desire to close the distance yet simultaneously an antithetical state of panic- Gojo had no doubt in his mind, this truly was the most twisted curse of them all.

Restlessness gets the best of him, quickly downing two cocktails and in no time, Gojo is drunk.  Very drunk.  Courage courses through his veins, a foreign and unfamiliar a substance as the alcohol was- as what use was courage to the World’s Strongest Sorcerer, the Honored One, the sole heir to the all powerful Six Eyes and Limitless techniques? 

But he let it influence his body and mind as a curse would; an unexpected ally against his worst enemy- himself.  His lips loosen as his heart overflows; weighted words finally escape that would otherwise cower and chain themselves to his throat.

“I really, really missed you Utahime.”  But his eyes said more...so much more.  

She’s unable to meet those cosmic orbs of his, refusing to allow herself to be drawn in by the gravity within them. 

“Well, you better work on your aim then” she replies, chortling at her lame joke as she sips her drink.

Gojo pressed on, undeterred now with alcohol marching to his aide.

“Did you…did you miss me….?”   As much as I missed you?  

Did you ache for me? 

As much as I ached for you?

Utahime was resolute, eyes locked onto her glass. 

“Hmm. I did notice it was a lot quieter lately.  Much more peaceful.  I missed that.  It was like a dream.”

“A dream, huh?” Gojo shakes his head, chuckling lightly.   Some things never change, and he was glad for it. 

“You know…the whole time we've been apart felt like a blur; I can't even tell you what I did or what happened.  It was like...being in a memory of a place, but the memory was fading.  Although there was one thing i do remember, a dream I had….one I could never forget.” He fought the urge to fidget with his glass as he continued, settling for an iron grip.

“I was on some train, maybe on my way to a mission, watching the sunset out the window…when suddenly you were there sitting next to me, and…and you were holding my hand. That was it, that was the dream.”  He winced at the juvenility of his words; an unavoidable effect of the alcohol but a worthy tradeoff if it gave him the strength to gamble it all, here and now.

"I didn’t know where the train was going, but it didn’t matter, because you were there- with me.  Watching the sunset, together.  And when I woke up, I couldn't believe it wasn’t real. I could feel your hand, your actual hand…”  

He manages to break the uneasy hold on his drink, his hand trailing across the table until it rests on top of her own, fingers coaxing hers to release the glass and intertwine with his.  

“And now I realize why.  Because every time I'm with you, it feels like a dream...” Gojo trails off, willing her to face him.

It works- Utahime an unwitting victim as she looks up and she’s instantly lost, consummately lost in the blinding ardentness in his eyes, the aching tenderness in his smile.   

Upon meeting her eyes, he throws his cards- his entire heart - on the table.

“…and I never want to wake up. Ever.”

****************

Just a drabble/short preview of my next chapter that i'll finish sometime in the next century. Thx for reading xoxo

[lala1267]

Is it wrong (Part 5)

Summary: literally just cilla arguing and Elvis finding out what cilla did to Lolita.

Notes: This chapter is fucking boring since I spent like 20 mins on this or whatever. (It's really short) I've had no motivation to write recently, sorry guys. Make sure to read the note at the end and let me know ur opinions xoxo.

Little Lolita was shaken by Elvis's sudden return. He did tell her, but the note fell into the wrong hands.

Downstairs

Priscilla looked at Elvis with a cold menacing look. Her eyes shot at him like lazer beams as she stood there with her fists balled and arms aggressively crossed over her chest that was violently heaving up and down. Elvis hugged and kissed Lisa lovingly as the most sweetest chuckles escaped his used lips. The way his cheeks defined and his hair hung made a light enter Priscilla's body. But she was not going to let it seep into her grey heart. Elvis put Lisa down and watched her run upstairs to Lolita. Elvis held his arms out wide as if he were waiting for his hug from Prsicilla. She just stood there with that stupid bitchy face of hers. Her pink lips pouted, and her brows furrowed. After a few seconds of awkward silence, Elvis lowered his long arms to his side. His face downturned, and his smile faded into a glum frown. He walked over to her before hugging her and caressing her.

"Oh, what's up, baby? What's the biggie?"

He questions as he eagerly hugs her. She wedges her small arms in between hers and Elvis's chest and pushes him away harshly. She looked up at him, her foxy eyes and her black hair making her look a lot more ghostly. Elvis tipped his head sidwards and raised his arms.

"What's wrong now? Don't be like this, I've only just come home."

His tone was now more stern and serious. His face was now more serious. He stared into Priscilla's moon-drunk, haunted, peirced soul. Her once royal blue eyes were like a dark night in a cemetery. The anger and sadness bubbled inside of her like a boiling kettle that whistled like a loud siren warning. Priscilla's lungs squeezed tight as she took a deep breath of the dense air that filled the room.

"You can have your wedding ring back. It will come in handy for your "Little Lolita. ""

She said in an annoying sarcastic voice as she slipped the diamond ring off her ring finger. Elvis's face contorted, and his hands jolted.

"What are you talking about?"

Elvis asked as his face turned a light shade of cherry red.

"You know exactly what I mean. Come on, sending fucking letters in the evening? You could have at least been more sneaky. You're a stupid man, stupid."

She shook her head in disappointment as she bit back her nasty tongue. She threw the ring hard at the core of Elvis chest.

"Oh, baby, i-i can explain."

He says before swallowing back his salty tears of shame. Priscilla's index finger pointed straight at Elvis's face as her bitter words finally released.

"How dare you do this to me. You were dogging me around whilst you and that little girl were necking on! She is just a no good little girl who wants to be a grown up, she is a fucking bitch! And you - don't even get me started on... you."

Elvis had a look of dismay, but he suddenly felt a wave of anger arise inside his heated heart.

"Don't talk about her like that!"

He exclaims as his finger wafted in her pathetic face. Priscilla's hand raised to slap Elvis across the face. They shared a moment of silence before the storm began. They shouted and fought like goddamn animals. Their animalistic behaviour sounded throughout the whole house.

Lolita sat on Elvis's and Priscilla's shared bed. Lisa sat on her lap in her little pink dress. Lolita tickled and played with her, trying her best to distract her from the wildfire that was going on downstairs. Baby dolls and toys sat on the satin bedsheets. Lisa held a Barbie doll in her small hand as Lolita held another. They played sweetly. She was like her older sister. Their playtime was broken when the door burst open and crashed against the wall, leaving an indent. In comes Prsicilla, whose face was red, and her eyes were glassy and bloodshot. Tears streamed down her face like a river. She glanced at Lolita and Lisa before stomping over to a large bag that sat on the floor. She gripped it tightly and lifted it before storming back out, slamming the door behind her. Lisa began to cry as the loud noise startled her. Lolita hugged her close and played with her short baby hair. Lolita just stared at the large grand door that had been previously slammed shut. She felt for Prsicilla. She felt guilty. A single tear dropped from her eye and to the red carpet. She quickly wiped it away whilst still keeping baby Lisa wrapped like a gift in her arms.

She sat there for a few more minutes. Heavy footsteps echoed in the hallway, causing Lolita to jump slightly. The footsteps grew closer. Lolita lifted Lisa up a bit higher so that she would cover her dull blue bruises that decorated her twig like colar bones. The door knob twisted and wiggled until Elvis entered the room. He looked exhausted and tired. His eyes met with Lolita's.

"Are you ok, E?"

He sighed before lighting a cigar.

"Yeah, yeah, I'm fine"

He said before breathing a large cloud of cigar smoke through his pink lips. He slowly walked over to Lolita, who still had Lisa in her arms. She looked good as a mother.

"Sweet baby."

He said before picking Lisa up from Lolita's arms. Lolita crossed her arms in hopes of disguising the ghostly bruises that decorated her body. Elvis played with Lisa before his eyes layed on Lolita.

"Why are ya crossing your arms so awkwardly?"

He said whilst letting out a chuckle.

"Just feel like it."

She said quietly as she broke eye contact with him. Elvis's smile faded.

"Are ya ok?"

His brows furrowed as he placed Lisa in her crib. He quickly sat down next to Lolita.

"I'm fine, Elvis, I'm fine."

She said quietly.

"Unfold your arms."

He ordered in a serious tone. Lolita looked up at him with her bami eyes that were filled with ocean blues.

"N-no, I'm fin-"

"I said unfold your arms, now."

He demanded calmy. His teeth grinded, and his fists clenched. Lolita looked up at him before slowly unfolding her arms to reveal her beaten body. Elvis's eyes widened at the sight.

"What happened?"

He asked, trying to contain his sorrow tears.

"I just fell."

"Don't bullshit me. Who did this to you!?"

Lolita felt a sea of tears escape her doll eyes.

"P-priscilla."

She said as she looked down and sucked up her shame. Elvis instantly wrapped his hands around her fragile body. She felt like a feather coated in soft satin. She felt cold and corpse like. She smelt of fresh winter air.

"She ain't getting away with this. No one hurts my baby."

He said through his teeth as he buried his face in her golden hair. His hands rubbed her blue sores. The warmth of his body sent a summer shine tingle through her veins. He bent his head down to kiss her blue bruises. A million kisses rained upon her, each one curing her ills.

Over the next few days, Elvis would love her like a baby and treat her like a child, his child. He would feed her, dress her, wash her, like his little baby doll. His touch would warm her cold skin through the dark, stormy nights as her salty tears dropped to the floor. His gaze would light her fragile heart as he would cuddle her like a teddy bear. His deep southern drawl evoked unknown emotions that were buried in the depths of her yellow sunny soul.

Guys, let me know if u want another part of this cause I'm getting kind of bored of this series. I don't mind carrying it on if u lot want more, but I won't if u guys don't want. But I have quite a few up and coming fics in the works. Im planning to make them just fics and not multiple parts, so u guys don't have to wait for new chapters to come out xoxo.

[mieriella]

Into the wild

Hey, I'm glad you found my post, stranger.

A few weeks ago, I had my final exams and now I started to play video games to kill the time, until the next semester will start in December. The last gaming-series I played was Call of Juarez.

I had these games a few years at home, never playing them. Now I did and I have to say - I'm totally in love! In sleepless nights I wrote the following fic on my mobile phone. Sadly there's not really a fan-base for CoJ. (Please tell me, if there is one and I just don't found it yet. I would be glad to read a few more storys about this fandom!)

I'm really sorry for my bad english - it isn't my first language and myself and some AI-Tool were the only ones, that proof-readed this whole thing.

I hope, you can at least enjoy it a little bit. I had lots of fun writing this little story and even if it's just sh*t, at least I could practice my poor english.

Please correct me, if I wrote something totally wrong or anything. I would be thankful!

XOXO

Mieriella

It contains a little bit of smut - so minors please DNI!

___________________________________________________________

Word count: ~12k

Warnings: Smut, mentions of rape, blood, death, love (is this a warning? Sorry, I'm new to this whole thing. Please tell me, if I forgot something important!)

„Hey Lady, what're you doin' here?", a deep voice came to your ears. You were lying on the ground and could hardly move. How long have you been out there in the wild?

You were aching as you turned your body around to look at the man, who was calling you. He was sitting on a dark brown horse, was tall, and looked very strong and the scar on his lip gave him also a dangerous look. Not very trustworthy. Your hand was going slowly to your waist and you tried to put out your gun. It was just a small lady's revolver. You were not sure if this kind of pistol could even hurt such a bull of a man. You haven't already reached out for your pistol, there you heard a familiar 'click'-sound of a colt being unlocked.

One look at the man and you could see, that he held this ranger right at your head. "Lady, don't make yourself unhappy.", he barked but had a small smile on his face.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

"I'm sorry, Mister...", your voice was slow, your mouth full of dust and you didn't know what you should do next. "Please don't hurt me...", you cried a little bit and let your head sink onto the dusty ground. You heard 'click'-sound again and felt a little bit relieved. He seemed to put his gun away. You heard the creak-sond of the leather of the saddle and then you heard heavy and slow steps towards you. You were rigid with fear when you felt his big hand on your shoulder, as he turned you around. He was not very careful, he just flipped you around without any effort. You hissed in pain as you had to look him right in the eyes. "How long have you been out there?", was his next question. You started coughing because of all the dust on the ground, not able to answer. He stood back up, went back to his horse, and came back with a field bottle. "Here, drink.", was his short instruction. You tried to take the bottle, but it was way too heavy for your weakened body. It just fell into the dust, luckily it was still closed, so none of the water would be spilled. He started kneeling on the ground and grabbed you under your shoulders. If you weren't this tired you would have fought against his grab because you still don't feel safe around him. His presence felt dangerous, even if this sounds silly. He laid your head on his knees and took the water bottle again. He opened it and then he brought it almost carefully to your lips. You drank slowly because you were afraid to choke. With a small lift of your hand, you gave him a sign that you had enough. He took the bottle away and closed it again. "Thank you.", your voice sounds still quirky as you look him back in his eyes. There seemed to be no expression on his face. "My horse broke it's leg a few miles ago. I had to... To... Shoot him.", you started crying and felt embarrassed, because you cried in front of this strange man, still resting your head on his knees.

You couldn't look him any longer in the eyes, as you turned with all the strength that you had on your side crying. At the moment there was no possibility for you to stop your whining, the tears just came out of your eyes like a waterfall.

Even if you can't look at him right now, you hear the confusion in his voice as he asks you the next question: "Are you crying because of this horse? Or... Did something else happen?"

You just shook your head: "he was my friend.", you whined, knowing, how stupid all this was. He seemed to be a gunslinger or a bounty hunter. For sure, he had killed people before, because there was no fear as he put the gun right to your head, ready to pull the trigger. And you were lying on his lap and crying for your horse.

"Well girl, friends come and go. Can you get up?", he patted your head awkwardly. "Where will you take me?", you stopped crying and looked back at him with fear in your eyes. He raised his shoulders. "I'm having a job in the next town. It's about a few days riding away. Where do you need to go?", he asked.

Again tears started to drop from the corner of your eyes. You didn't know where to go. You were running away from home because of your abusive family. "It's okay, just leave me here.", was your response, as you dropped yourself off of his lap and lay back on the ground in the heat of the sun. "you know you will die here, if I don't take you with me?", again he smiled - he seemed to have a strange kind of humor. "I can't trust you. Rather I die here. I don't know what you want to do to me.", you were truly afraid. Yes, he shared his water with you and seemed to be at least not a very bad person, but there was also a chance that he will rape you, sell you, punish you or kill you.

"Right now I want to help you.", he stood back up and looked down at you. "But if you don't want me to help you, I have no problem letting you die here.", he shrugged, took his water bottle, and stepped back to his horse. He hadn't even left you behind as you shouted at him: "Please take me with you.", you were surprised by yourself, but suddenly it seemed to be more horror to die here slowly in the sun as to go with the strange man. "I don't want to die here alone...", now you almost begged at him as he turned around and lifted you up. "As you wish, girl. Can you stand up?", he still holds you under your shoulders. You nodded slowly as you tried to stand on your own feet. It worked not very well, but at least it worked.

He put your right arm around his waist and dragged you to his horse. "I'll help you to get in the saddle.", he instructed as you grabbed the horn of the saddle with your hands and he took your foot to lift you slowly up. For you, it was hard work to get in the saddle, but for him, it seems that he didn't need any strength to lift you up. You leaned forward as he took one foot in the stirrup to bring himself up to the horse. He sat behind the saddle as he leaned forward to grab the reins. You could feel his chest on your back and his breath on your neck. You shuddered as he had the reins and leaned back. "You ready, girl? By the way my name's Ray.", with his words he took you out of your thoughts. What was wrong with you?

His arms were still resting on the sides of your hips, holding the reins. You were not sure, what you should think about this man. He seemed to be no gentleman but he saved your life - for the first. You told him your name as you suddenly got really tired. He took the horse into a slow trot as he noticed you yawning. "Hold on girl, we won't ride very long. I'm just looking for a good spot to stay the night."

You nodded tiredly and leaned s little bit back so you could find rest on his chest. You knew you should not send him wrong signals, but you were very tired, your body was aching and he was the one who had his hands on your hips the whole time.

"Wake up, little lady.", you heard his voice right into your left ear and his hands shook your shoulders. Not violently, but also not gentle. You opened your eyes slowly and yawned again. The horse has stopped under a big tree. As you looked around, you saw a little creek and some rocks. This was a good place to stay the night. It was already dark and the stars had already risen in the sky. "Can you move?", again he shook on your shoulder. You noticed, that you hadn't answered him yet and you turned your head a little bit around. "You're a real gentleman, Ray.", you snorted with a little laugh in your voice, as you leaned a little bit forward to show him, that you could sit in the saddle without his help.

He let go of your shoulders and got off the horse. "I know, madam. Otherwise, I would have let you die outside.", he said, on his face a crooked grin. "Come down here.", without any other asking he took you by the waist and helped you to get out of the saddle. Your legs were shaking from your weight on them and you held his hand while you let yourself down on the ground. You were still tired as hell and you could sleep instantly on the dry ground. "Wait a second.", he took his hand out of yours and was going to the saddlebags. He took some blankets out of them and put them before you on the ground. "Here, make yourself comfortable.", he said and took his horse to the little creek. His steps went farther and farther until you couldn't hear them anymore.

As you woke up again, it was the deepest night. You were wrapped in the blankets, but still shivering because of the cold here. Your mouth was dry again. You looked around and saw Ray sitting on the ground in front of a little fire smoking a cigarette and holding a bottle of whiskey in the other hand. He seemed not to notice, that you have woken up again. Slowly you stood up and went to the small fire. Still shivering.

"Hi Ray...", you said quietly as you sank back down to the ground and wrapped the blankets back around your body. Finally, he noticed you and looked at you. "Hey little lady.", the sound of his voice was a little washed-up, he seemed to be a little drunk. Still, his face was hard, without any expression on it. You started to feel uncomfortable again. But you were thirsty. "Do you have some water?", you asked kindly with a shy smile on your lips.

"Wouldn't you like to drink some whiskey, girl?", He raised his eyebrows and stood up from the ground to give you the almost-filled whiskey bottle. His walk was a little bit wankend and you crouched a little bit back from him as he came close to you. You knew if he wanted to do something to you, you were still too weak to run away.

His look at you was confused, not knowing while you got back from him.

"Water, please...", you said to him, only taking a short look into his eyes. Again he shrugged and went to the saddle on the ground. He had tied the horse at the creek to get it some rest. It took a while and you heard the sounds of bottles shaking each other. It sounded like in the bags were only some rugs, one field bottle of water, and lots of booze.

After some time he wanked back to you, he opened the field bottle clumsy and handed it to you. You drank and gave it back to him. "Thanks, Ray...", you said slowly.

"You're welcome. Here, eat something. You must have been starving.", ha gave you some beef jerky and you felt your stomach aching. Yeah, he was right, you haven't eaten in a while.

Not very ladylike you slang the jerky down. It was like the sole of an old shoe, but you were starving, so it tasted like the best meal you could imagine.

"Are you freezing?", again you heard his deep voice. He was sitting beside you, a little bit too near. You looked at him and shook your head. "No, I'm fine. Thank you.", you said quietly and got a little bit away from him, to get more distance.

Without any words, he took his long, black leather coat off his shoulders and wrapped it almost gently around you. "Here take it. Don't be afraid, I won't come near to you. I'm used to women not wanting me near them.", he looked back to the fire and grabbed a little silver case out of the pocket of his shirt. He lit a new cigarette without looking at you. You wrapped the leather jacket around you. It was still warm from his body and smelled like him - a sweet mixture of sun, tobacco, whiskey, and sweat. You felt yourself heat a little bit up, not only from the warmth of the jacket.

What the hell was wrong with you? His acts towards you made you feel uncomfortable and comfortable at the same time.

You felt a little bit more safe around him, because of his former words. Slowly you moved a little bit towards him and looked at him. He caught your eye. You looked at his face a bit more intensely. He took the wide black hat off and now you were able to see his hair. It was light brown and got to his neck. The ends of it are a little bit lighter because of the sun. His eyes were dark and deep into the holes. His nose was big and a little bit crooked, but it fitted well into his face. His lips were full with a long scar on the left side. You wondered how he got this scar.

"Are you okay?", his question brought you out of your thoughts. Damnit, you were truly sending him the wrong signals.

"I'm sorry, I was just in thought.", you answered him slowly. "Could you please give me a cigarette too?", you tried to change the topic because you felt a little bit embarrassed. "Sure.", he replied and took the silver case out of the pocket of his shirt again. He handed one cigarette to you and helped you lighting it with a match he threw in the fire afterwards. Then he placed the bottle of whiskey between you both. "Take a sip if you want. It helps against the coldness."

You took a deep breath inhaling your cigarette as you began to speak: "Thank you Ray. And thanks for your jacket. I feel almost cozy now.", you smiled at him and he smiled back before he grabbed the bottle again and took a long sip. "What kind of job do you have to do in the next town?", you asked after you threw the cigarette into the fire.

He yawned. "I just have to collect something for my brother... After that, we go back to our family ranch."

"You're a rancher?", you asked surprised. "You look more like a gunslinger or a bounty hunter.", there words came out of your mouth before you could think about it. You shouldn't tease him. He looked at you and raised an eyebrow. "You're funny, girl. I take this as a compliment. Yeah, me and my brother were running our family ranch, before we had to go to war.", he looked back into the fire. "Oh fuck, you were into war? I'm sorry, Ray.", was the only answer you got in your mind after a short break. "It's not your fault.", he said, looking back at you. You felt the urge to go closer to him, but you knew you shouldn't do this. "I'm glad you made it out alive.", you said instead. He grinned: "I'm sure you are - otherwise you would be dead in the prairie."

You rolled your eyes, starting to feel comfortable around him: "You have a really strange kind of humor.", you started laughing a little bit and took the whiskey bottle to your lips. You made one sip and felt the burning feeling on your tongue and in your throat.

"But you're right, I am glad that you found me. At first, I was really afraid of you. But you don't seem to be a bad guy. Even if the only thing that makes you smile is macabre stuff...", you took another sip, and now you were fixed to the whiskey. "You know, I don't really have a reason to smile.", he answered to you. "But you can give me one, if you like.", his face came really near to you. But you took your flat palm on his chest and put him away. "Ray, you're drunk. You make me feel uncomfortable.", you said and looked him straight in the eyes, with a little bit of fear.

Suddenly he grunted and pulled back. "Sorry, girl. I'm really drunk and you're way too beautiful for me.", he looked back to the fire.

"You're on the best way to become a gentleman, Ray.", you smiled softly at him. You were relieved that he didn't just take what he wanted. Maybe it was time to trust him.

"I'm going to sleep now. Don't be afraid of me. I won't do anything you don't like.", he murmured in his washed-up voice and stood up. He walked a out of your sight, as you laid back down. It was really time to sleep.

-*-

The next morning, you woke up early and for one second you were wondering where you were. Then the memory came back and you looked around for Ray. But you saw neither him nor his horse. Have he left you? You stood up and an uncomfortable feeling came up your guts. Fuck, did he leave you dying out here? Should you have slept with him yesterday to save your life? Was he that kind of guy?

Your legs were still shaky and you took his black jacket with you as you started searching for him. A rational voice in your head said, that he wouldn't leave without this jacket. Or without his saddle that laid near the fire. Or without his hat lying on top of the saddle.

You came to the creek and spotted the dark horse first. It was tied to a tree and eating some of the grass on the ground. You smalled your eyes and spotted Ray. He was laying down the grass at the bank his head covered with his hands. You were not sure if he was sleeping.

The morning was cold and you snuggled yourself deeper into his leather jacket. You decided to wake him up, not sure how much time you two had to stay here.

"Hey Ray.", you raised your voice but there was no reaction from him. You stepped closer to him, just to hear him snoring slightly. "Raaaay...", you kneeled down and shook his shoulder to wake him up. He grunted and turned himself towards you, opening his eyes. "Good morning sweetheart...", he muffled slowly and closed his eyes because of the rising sun. You smiled at him. "Good morning, gentleman.", was your reply. "When do we have to go?", you asked him.

He sat up and buried his face into his palms. "Stop talking...", he grunted and slowly got on his feet. "I need a few moments...", he stumbled to the creek, went on his knees, and washed his face. "Maybe you shouldn't drink so much.", you said to him after you went to the creek too. "Shut up, or I'll teach you some manners.", he barked, hiding a grin. You had to laugh. You saw in his face, that he was just making fun and was not really pissed off. It was just his crooked sense of humor.

Ray looked back into the water and kept on washing his face as you gave him a kick with your foot. He stumbled before he lost his balance and fell head-first into the cold water. You started laughing a bit surprised – you didn’t think your kick would unbalance a man his size. But then you saw how he stroked his hair out of his eyes and fixated on you. "Lady, you will regret this.", he grinned dangerously and stood up in the water. It was not very deep, only going to his waist. He climbed out of the water: "Maybe you want to take my jacket off?", he said as he headed straight to you. You were unable to run, he had already caught you, laughing. "Yesterday I was right, you can give me a reason to smile.", he told you as you squeaked and tried to make it out of his arms. He was wet and cold. Easily he put the leather coat off your shoulders and dragged you to the water. Both of you laughed as he gave you a soft push and you fell into the water. Luckily you were holding on to Ray and you were taking him with you in the cold creek. He was still a little bit drunk - otherwise, you wouldn't have caused him to stumble.

The water was freezing cold, but you deserved it. You were the one pushing him first into it. You made it out of his grab, laughing and shaking. "Okay, I've learned my lesson.", you said to him and he was looking at you with a crooked grin. "Are you sure, girl?", He asked. You nodded. "Good otherwise I would have put you over my knee.", he warned you with joy in his eyes as he turned around to get out of the water. You blushed a little bit at this thought, but in the next second, you could kick yourself. What the hell was wrong with you? Gladly he didn't see you because he was already climbing out the creek. He turned around again, looking towards you and offering you his hand to help you get out. You took his strong hand and he lifted you up.

"I'm getting some more firewood to make us and our clothes dry.", he said as he started to pull off his clothes in front of you. Fuck, as you kicked him into that little river you were not thinking about getting dry afterwards. You got back to the burned-out fireplace and started to peel yourself out of your wet clothes. Then you wrapped yourself around one of the blankets.

Ray joined you within a few minutes, wrapped a blanket around his waist and for one second you caught a look at his bare chest. He had lots of scars. Big ones, smaller ones. Some of them had healed well, others didn't. He was well trained and on his arms, his muscles showed. Before you stared too long, you quickly looked away and grabbed the water bottle out of the saddle bag. Without any words, Ray lit the fire. He hung his clothes up in a tree near the fire to get them dry. So did you.

"I should be the one to be afraid of you.", he started as he sat beneath the fire. You looked at him. "It looks like you are the one trying to seduce me.", he grinned at you and you had to laugh - a little bit too much and a little bit too high. "You're a funny guy, Ray.", was your answer. You were not sure if he had noticed how you looked at his chest, but you didn't want to think about it any longer, otherwise, you would turn red again. "But I'm glad to make you smile. It seems that you had a difficult time behind you.", you said to him in a soft voice, looking into his eyes. He caught your eyes and nodded slowly. If the two of you only would know what a brutal and traumatic time was about to start - especially for Ray. But at the moment it was good to laugh a little bit.

"Lady, you still haven't told me, where you want to go.", he started to talk, his dark eyes resting on yours.

You shrugged: "I didn't tell you, because I don't know." He raised an eyebrow: "Are you a little runaway?", he asked.

You nodded: "Yeah, I had to leave my family because of some... incidents. I couldn't stay any longer with them." You felt how your eyes got watery as you looked away, so you didn't have to show him that you were almost crying again.

"Ah, that's a shame.", he shook his head, and you were glad, that he didn't ask any further about your situation. "Family should be the most important in anyone's life."

Poor Ray, if he only knew what terrible things would happen to him very soon and how his beloved family would be torn apart.

"Maybe...", was your slow answer. You were not sure what you could say now. "I think I will look for a job in the next town. How long is it until we are there?"

Ray looked up in the sky, checking the sun. It was two hours before noon. "Well, we would be quicker if we hadn't waited until our stuff is dry...", he said in his thoughts. "Maybe four or five days riding and we will be there.", he said after a short break. "Tell me, if you become a prostitute. I can pay.", he laughed at you and seemed to already forgot the family-topic.

"You bastard.", you barked at him and threw a stick you grabbed from the ground in his direction. He dodged. "C'mon, Darling. I'm just trying to make you laugh.", he wiggled his eyebrows. Yeah, you were smiling. "Have I already told you, that your sense of humor is fucked up? I can understand that there will be no women with you unless you pay her.", now you wiggled your eyebrows towards him.

"Hmm...", he started. "Right now you are here with me. Maybe I should abduct you...", he seemed to think about this matter. "You're a real gentleman, Ray.", you hissed as you rolled your eyes towards him.

-*-

As your clothes went dry you put it on and packed your stuff. As Ray was saddling his horse you went to the creek refilling the water bottle.

Today it was easier to climb into the saddle. You only needed a little bit of help from Ray.

"Do you think we both are too heavy for him?", you asked, just as he was about to climb in the saddle too. "Nah...", he refused: "And even if we are too heavy - I have a cold-blooded killer with me, who will shoot him."

"You‘re starting to get on my nerves. Maybe I should shoot you.", you said a bit pissed off, because you are still sad because of your horse. "Try, little lady.", he looked up to you. "I have no problem to have a duel with a woman."

"Maybe later... I have to practice first.", you took his hat from his head and put it on yours. Because you were already sitting on the horse it was easy for you and he was not able to take the hat away from you.

"Oh, I'll help you practice.", he grinned and patted your tigh. "But first I really have to lay you over my knee."

You felt the tension between you two since you both had fooled around in the water. It was crazy how close you came in this short time.

Ray got himself onto the horse, again sitting behind the saddle. He took his hat from your head and again he leaned forward to grab the reins. Again he let his hands rest on your thighs and you could feel his strong chest on your back. This time it felt much more comfortable. Almost a little bit too comfortable. You leaned against him, closing your eyes for just a second. "Are you ready, little lady?", he asked you quietly, directly in your ear. You shivered from his words and from the feeling of him being so close to you. He felt your little shaking and started to smile. "Yeah.", you answered slowly.

"Okay, then let's go.", his voice was soft, and for a moment he rested his chin on your shoulder before he was putting the horse first in a trot, and then into a canter.

-*-

Again it was almost dark and you already felt tired. You have reached your place for the stay tonight. Again you stopped at a river - now it was not a little creek anymore - and the grass on the ground was way more green than in your stay yesterday. Ray stopped the horse, got off it, and helped you down. "Thanks, Ray, but I don't need your help getting down. I'm feeling way better.", you said as you stood in front of him. His hands still rested on your waist. "I know, but I'm trying to be a gentleman, girl. Get yourself some rest, I'm lighting a fire meanwhile."

"Thanks, Ray.", you smiled at him. For a second you both just stood there, looking each other in the eyes. Then you pulled away and got back to the horse, leaving him standing alone. You put the saddle down the horse and grabbed in the bags for the blankets, some beef jerky, and the field bottle of water.

Ray lit a fire while you were eating some of the jerky and also offered it to him. "Nah, thanks girl.", he refused. "I can't eat this nasty sole of a shoe anymore."

He put his half-filled bottle of whiskey out of the saddle bag. "I just drink this, then I don't need to eat.", he said and got down on the ground next to you. Without any other words, he put his black coat off his shoulders again and wrapped it around your body. His touch didn't feel uncomfortable anymore, it felt cozy and a little bit teasing.

"Thank you, for all you did for me.", you looked at him, smiling. "No worries, girl. You're a good company.", he shrugged, without any smile. Sometimes you were not sure what you should think about him. He had many faces. In one moment he was funny, in others he was flirty, nasty, grumpy, and sometimes really caretaking. Like now.

"Let's have a smoke and a drink, girl.", he said as he handed you the cigarette case. You took one of the cigarettes and lit it up. He did the same. For a moment you both were quiet. You could only hear the little crackle of the fire, and the horse grazing beneath the lake. You inhaled the smoke and took a sip out of the whiskey bottle Ray handed you after he drank a few sips from it. He leaned back and looked into the stars after he took his hat off. You first looked at the silhouette from his face in the shimmering dying light of the fire. He was a fine-looking man. Not really a gentleman and maybe he had done a few morally questionable things in his past - and was about to do horrible things in his near future - but he seemed to be not a bad man at all.

You laid back on your back and looked at the stars too. Your eyes searched for some star pictures, while Ray drank a little bit more of the whiskey and handed you the bottle afterwards. You took a sip.

This happened as long as the bottle was empty. For sure, Ray had drunk most of it while the both of you were chatting about the silent night, the stars, and your journey today. But you also drank too much whiskey. You sat yourself up and rested your head in your palms.

Ray kept just laying back and grinned: "A little bit drunk, young lady?"

You looked at him and rolled your eyes. "Fuck off, Ray. It sounds like you wanted to make me drunk.", you grinned back.

"Oh you, want to come over my knee?", he asked and you could hear in his voice that he was a bit drunk too. He laughed and grabbed for your arm. He turned you around and you looked each other in the eyes. Your palm went up to rest over his hand, which was still near your shoulder. This touch was exciting like sex.

You saw into his dark eyes and came closer to his face. He cupped your cheek with one hand and you were resting your arms beneath his head. It seemed to be a long time till your lips finally met. Ray kissed you with force and a little bit sloppy. Seemed he waited the whole day for this moment. You sighed into his kiss and leaned a little bit more onto him. His hand got into your hair and he grunted as you let his tongue slip into your mouth. He tasted like whiskey and cigarettes and there was no better taste you could imagine. You sat up on his lap and pulled his shirt, so he sat too now. You looked deeply into his eyes which were covered in lust. He kissed your throat a bit sloppy as he took his black coat off your shoulders and started to remove your blouse. He straightened it off your shoulders and with some rough movements he threw your bra away.

You moaned and buried your hands into his hair as he gently sucked your neck. For sure there will be a bruise tomorrow. He made a little distance between you both to take a look at your exposed breasts. "You're damn hot, sweetheart.", he grumped between heavy breathing. As he touched you, it felt like a heatwave going through your body. You moaned, leaned forward into his touch, and started kissing him again. Your hand got down to his pants struggling with his belt. Finally, you got it with a bit of help from him and wrapped your hand around his hard cock. He hissed, biting your shoulder softly as you let your fist go up and down his shaft. You pumped him while you were kissing each other, and moans muffled into the mouth of the other.

Without any patience he opened your jeans, letting his hand slip into it, and softly touched your pussy through your panties. Both of you groaned. "Fuck, I barely touched you and you are already so needy.", he looked into your face with dark and lustful eyes. You grabbed him by the neck and put him closer to your face. "I got so fucking wet only from seeing your already hard dick.", you whispered in his left ear, with a grin. Without any other words, he slipped your panties aside and let his middle finger and ring finger slip into your folds. You gasped for air, stretching your neck a bit. As soon as you did this, he kissed your throat again.

"Will you take your trousers off for me?", he almost purred in your ear, a sound in his voice that you never heard before.

You nodded slightly as you stood up for a second, and took your trousers and panties off. You set back in his lap, feeling his throbbing cock at your entrance. He took you in his embrace, grabbing you closer to him. You let yourself sink down and felt his dick sliding into you. You hissed because of his thickness, he moaned silently. It took you a second until you were comfortable with his big dick in your pussy. You kissed him again, then you started to move slowly. You moaned into his ear and he let out a groan, as he was stroking your tits, playing with your nipples. The air was cold, but you were heated up like you never were in your life before. You weren't a virgin, but this experience with the gunslinger outside in the wild was the most erotic thing you ever had with a man. You were sitting naked on him, while he only had taken his cock out. His hips started to move with your rhythm. His heavy breath went straight into your ears. You felt the little hair in your neck stood up and you were shivering. "Are you cold, lady?", Ray stopped his movement for a moment, looking you in the eyes. "You're too sweet...", you started, still bouncing on his dick. "... But please just shut up and fuck me.", you gasped.

He grinned: "Naughty girl."

Without any strength, he lifted you a little up and switched your place. Now you were lying under him on the blankets. He positioned his arms beneath your face, holding his weight, and kissed you as he started to pound in you more forcefully. You grabbed his arm, felt his muscles under his shirt, and moaned loudly, as you felt how your guts tightened together and your face started to burn more and more. Your throat felt almost as dry as yesterday when he found you, but today it was in a good way. "Don't stop Ray, I'm about to cum.", you gasped catching his eye. You haven't even spoken these words out when Ray's pounding started to get sloppier and heavier. You felt, how he threw his dick balls-deep into your pussy and his breath got heavier and heavier.

Like a band of rubber strapped more and more, your orgasm was overwhelming you. The band snapped and you groaned out his name, buried your nails into his shoulders and your pussy started to spasm around his dick as you came. He was just behind you, holding his own orgasm back to let you ride your high. It took all his willpower not to cum right into your cunt. But maybe he was really a gentleman, because he fucked you with an almost painful look on his face through your high.

As your moans got a little bit more quiet, his groans grew louder and louder. With one last heavy pound, he came deep inside you, burying his head in your neck.

It took you both a few seconds before any of you was able to talk again. You just were lying there, his dick was still in your pussy as he stroked some strands of your hair out of your face. "Fuck Ray, you're a real gentleman for letting me come first.", you told him, padding his cheek playfully. He smiled: "I'm sorry for saying, but fucking you was one of the first things I thought about when I met you."

You rolled your eyes: "I want to take back what I just said."

He kissed your cheek until he got himself up, standing up without any other announcement. Suddenly you started to freeze a little bit, as you grabbed your clothes and put them back on your shaking body. He closed his jeans again and took another bottle of whiskey out of the bag of the saddle. You sighed while you were looking at him and snuggling yourself into the blankets. Ray sat beneath you and opened the bottle, drinking a few sips down. You turned yourself on your back and were again looking up into the stars. Suddenly you felt like you would start to cry any minute. Not because of Ray, nor his drinking or anything. But you were hidden by a post-nut-clarity and now you started to worry about, where you should go in a few days. Teardrops already started to build in the corner of your eyes, but you immediately wiped them away. You didn't want to cry in front of him. Otherwise, he must think you were absolutely insane.

You felt his strong hand touching your knee, as you turned your head towards him. "You alright, lady?", he asked, holding the bottle of whiskey in front of you. You sat yourself up a little bit and took it with a small smile. "Thanks...", you sighed. "Ray, I know it sounds stupid, but are you afraid of the future?", you asked him before you thought about it any further. He raised an eyebrow towards you, not answering for a second. "Nah, I'm not...", he started after a few moments. "I made it out of the war alive, soon it will be over. Soon I will be back home and then I can leave all the things I did and everything that was done to me behind."

You did not expect him to answer your question so honestly. "Does the war hunt you in your dreams?", you asked him, as you grabbed his hand and held him tight.

He nodded: "Yeah, that's why I need all the whiskey to sleep without any dreams." Ray looked at the almost full bottle. "But soon it will get better. Bad things happen, we can't do anything about it."

For a second he thought about the crimes he did during war. Killing civilists, sometimes even women, making kids into orphans. Abusing the prisoners of war. Betrayed his own company.

He took his hand away from you and looked up into the sky. "Sorry Ray, it was wrong of me, to ask you this question.", you apologized. For sure it was hard for him to remember the things he did and all the horrific things that were done to him.

"Nah, it's okay. We should stop talking about me. What about you? Are you afraid of the future?", he asked you back and was thankful, that he didn't have to talk about war any further. You nodded softly. "I am.", you whispered, trying not to cry. "I'm not sure if I can survive alone. I'm afraid to never get happy my whole life...", now some tears ran silently down your cheeks.

He shrugged: "I think life isn't about being happy at all. It's just surviving. Like killing or getting killed.", he replied, not very gently. There he was again: Badass gunslinger Ray.

"But I'm sure you'll make it. Are you able to shoot with your little pistol?", he asked you back. Maybe he was not very romantic, but at least he was realistic. You shook your head: "Not really. I'm not sure if my little lady pistol would hurt a man your size."

He grinned: "I'll show you tomorrow how to shoot with one of my rangers. These guns will hold back all the bad boys. But now try to sleep, sweetheart.", he leaned beneath you, stroking your cheek, kissing you almost softly again.

Damn, this man had many faces.

-*-

The next morning you woke up early. The sun was already barely rising and your head ached a little bit from the way to big amount of whiskey you drank yesterday. You were lying on the blankets, a strong arm wrapped around you and your back felt warm and comfortable. Ray was sleeping behind you, lightly snoring. You turned around in his grip, so you could look him in his face. You cupped his cheek with your left palm and your thumb stroked him softly. "Good morning.", you whispered as he opened one eye, looking not very friendly at you. "Girl, the fuck stop waking me up.", he said as he tightened his grip around you and pressed you a bit more to his chest to make you stop speaking. "Stop it.", your voice was muffled because you were pressed against his shirt. "Calm down, you will be very tired soon.", he placed his chin on your head and started to close his eyes again. "For sure. I think we both need a bath.", you told him, pressing your hands against his chest to get a little bit more away from him.

"You start to get on my nerves.", he growled as you got out of his arm and stood up. You shrugged: "If you want to see me naked, find me at the river. Otherwise, you could start to lighten the fire again, so I won't catch a cold after my bath."

He groaned and turned around. You waited for a few moments, until you were sure that he wouldn't come. Then you went to the river and took your clothes off.

The water was cold and the air was still fresh. Just as yesterday as Ray threw you into the creek after you kicked him. But it was really nice to get some of the dust from yesterday off your body.

You didn't hear him coming. You were sitting in the shallow water near the bay of the river, thinking about the last few days, as two strong arms grabbed you from behind.

You squeaked in surprise.

"You are such an easy-to-catch prey.", he whispered into your ear, as he took you under your shoulders out of the water up to your feet. You couldn't turn around because of his grab, but you felt that he was also naked. You already felt his boner pushing in your back.

You grinned as he took his head closer to yours and kissed your cheek. "I didn't know that you could get up so quickly.", you said between some soft kisses.

"You see - I have to look after you. Otherwise, someone will steal you.", he smiled.

You rubbed yourself a bit on his body. "Are you able to swim? It's getting pretty cold, we should move a little.", you whispered into his ear.

"Ahh, girl, I know some better way to heat you up.", he said as he loosened his grip around you.

You took your chance and jumped into the water. "Then catch me, boy."  You teased him with soaked wet hair as you began to swim. There was not one second passed, then you already heard the sound of splashing water. After a few seconds, Ray headed into you and grabbed your shoulder. Because he was really tall he was able to stand in the river. He took you closer again. "Lady, you should watch out for snakes in the water.", he grinned dirty and kissed you again as his right hand wandered straight to the middle of your body, touching your inner thighs. You hummed softly into this kiss. He let his fingers go through your folds and groaned a little bit as he felt that you already were wet. "I think", you started under heavy breathing. "I already saw a big snake."

"Then we should get out of the water quickly. Hurry up, I already lit a fire for you.", he said, coming closer and closer to your ear. "You can relax a little bit before we go on our ride again and I can help you with this.", he whispered his last words, taking your hand and leading you out of the water.

You shivered as you wrapped your blanket around yourself, but Ray already had other plans for you. He peeled you out of the blanket again, leading you softly on the ground and himself over you. You opened your legs, felt his dick already pressing against your pussy. He kissed you: "I can heat you up better than any of these blankets could do."

He kissed all the way down your body, stopping between your legs. He kissed your inner thighs as you sharply breathed into the morning air. He hummed in a deep voice, stroking over your folds. You grabbed his leather jacket beneath you because of the could, putting it over your chest. As you smelled him in the jacket you whimpered a little bit. Sun, tobacco, whiskey, and sweat.

As you felt his tongue on your pussy you thought you would come instantly. Your legs started to shake as he started sucking your clit. He put them over his shoulders, to keep you more stable as you grabbed your nails into his jacket. "Ray...", you purred. He let out a hot breath against your folds, which let you whimper again. Immediately you felt really hot. It took you only a few moments to come all over his face. As you moaned loudly he started to groan between your legs, sucking your juices in like a starving man.

Like yesterday he let you ride your high, until he came up to your face again, kissing you sloppy. Your juices were all over his chin, you felt his throbbing dick at your tigh. He rubbed himself against you to get a bit of release.

You weren't able to do anything right now. Your left hand was only stroking his hair, still wet from the bath you both took not long ago. He groaned into your ear: "Are you relaxed yet, lady?"

"Yeah.", was your slow answer, still overwhelmed by your orgasm. He took himself a bit up, now smiling into your face like a puppy waiting for his treat for being a good boy. You stroke his cheek, closing your eyes. You felt how he got one of his hands on his cock starting to jack himself off. "You want to cum on my tits, Ray?", you asked him smirking, looking straight into his eyes.

Of course, he wanted nothing more. Except fucking you right into your throbbing pussy. But you were too exhausted right now.

"Seeing you cumming was so hot, girl.", he groaned, now already kneeling beneath you and pumping his cock. His pupils grew wider and after a few moments, he shut his eyes while his cum was dripping out of his cock and he was moaning loudly, fucking his fist until he came down from his high.

To see him come in front of you was almost as hot as your own orgasm.

-*-

Today you were a little bit late for your ride towards the city. For you, there was no problem with it, but Ray wanted to reach the city as soon as possible. For sure, he wanted to see his family again after his little brother Thomas and he were separated from them because of the war.

Unfortunately, today was a crazy hot day. The air seemed to glim because of the burning sun. You could almost hear the heat.

"We should rest here.", Ray told you, after two or three hours of riding. He brought the horse to a little rock formation, which would give you some cover from the sun.

He stopped the horse and got down, the same you did. He took out the blankets of the saddle bags and reached them to you: "We should try to sleep a bit. Maybe we can ride on in the evening.", he said looking at you, little rivers of sweat running down his face. You nodded slowly, not really able to say something. The heat made you feel dizzy. Your head was aching, your mouth dry and you sweated like a horse. "Are you okay, girl?", he asked you. You smiled at him. He could be such a sweetheart. "Yeah, I'm okay. Only the heat is a little bit too much for me.", you answered, stepping a bit towards him, leaning your head on his chest. He got with his fingers through your hair: "Get yourself some water and try to sleep. We will rest until the evening."

You did as he said and fell asleep immediately after you laid down.

When you woke up, the sun was really low on the horizon, already hiding beyond some rocks. The air has cooled down. You sat yourself up to look for Ray. He was lying not far away from you in the dust, using his saddle as a pillow. His hat covered his eyes, but he wasn't sleeping, because he already started to talk as you set up: "Did you sleep well?"

Instead of answering him, you started to yawn, followed by a slow nod.

You stood up and walked towards him. He took his hat away, catching your eyes. "Should we go on?", you asked him. "I'm sure, you want to be in the town as soon as possible."

He shrugged: "Don't worry about me, we will make it in one or two days. And you know what's the first thing, I will do there?", he didn't wait for your answer, already talking further: "Going into a bar, drinking a cold beer and eating a big fat steak, bloody as hell."

You grinned at him: "Please stop talking about steaks, Ray. I'm hungry as hell. And I can't eat the fucking beef jerky anymore."

"Yeah, so can't I, girl." He replied.

For a moment he seemed to think about something. Then he started talking again, damn this man didn't look like it, but he was really chatty: "Before we ride along, I'll show you to shoot. It's really important for you to know it. This world can be dangerous as hell, you know?", he raised his eyebrows towards you. You nodded: "Would be great if you could show me how to shoot."

Ray brought himself up to his feet, taking some small stones and rocks off the ground, just to go a few steps away. He placed the stones on bigger rocks, on the branch of a tree, and some on the ground. Then he got back to you, taking one of his rangers out of the holster and handing it to you.

You took the gun first with both hands and were surprised at how heavy it was. You looked at it, turning it around in your hands. The revolver was silver with a lightly gold shimmer. Even if you didn't know much about weapons, you could see that this gun was used very often. On the shaft, there was a gravure that said 'McCall'.

"Your last name?", you asked, pointing your finger at the gun. He nodded, taking out the other gun from the holster, looking at it. "My dad gave these two to me when I was about sixteen years old."

For a second you imagined, how his last name would fit your first name. Then you cut this thought off really quickly. You started to act like a teenager in love.

"Did you have to use them often?", this question was not very smart either, because you could see, how used the guns were. "You know, girl, I'm the oldest brother. William is a fine young lad, he wouldn't ever cause any trouble. But Thomas...", he started to laugh a bit "...well, he's a real troublemaker. And I always have to save him from the husbands of the women he screwed or from a fight he brought himself in because of his loose mouth. So yeah, sometimes I had to use them."

You nodded, not sure what you should think about it. You never ended someone's life, except for this matter with your horse a few days ago. "Don't think too much about it...", he started as he saw your worried face. "You know, god made man, but Samuel Colt made them all equal. The most men I killed in a fair fight.", he grinned crookedly.

You sighed: "I hope I never have to use a gun against anyone."

Ray raised an eyebrow towards you: "May I remember you, that you wanted to shoot me the first time we met?", he asked surprised. "Ray, I was afraid as hell when I first saw you. I was already dying on the dusty ground.", you snorted and started to defend yourself: "I wouldn't have shot you."

"For sure not.", he said. "I wouldn't have given you a chance to shoot me. But enough of talking. Let me show you how the rangers work."

The first time you shot with the heavy ranger, you couldn't have failed more. The gun was pulling your hand down, making it shakey as hell. Ray told you, that the ranger wasn't a gun meant to be handled by a woman, but it has a powerful punch. "This gun can protect you from anyone.", he told you as he stood behind you, holding your arm straight up. "But if it's too heavy for you, I can also protect you from anyone.", he now almost whispered into your ear. The little hair on your neck stood up as you heard his voice so close to you.

"You have to fulfill a few duties, you can't protect me yet.", was your slight protest, leaning onto his chest, and pressing your back against it. "Yeah, not yet.", he started. "But just imagine, you were living on my farm. I could do you all day.", he just thought about it, but his breath got already heavier. You put the gun down, turned around, and looked him straight in the eyes: "Is this the only thing I'm being good for?", your voice was a little bit pissed and you immediately felt stupid. Of course, he was not in love with you. You both couldn't be in love with each other, you barely knew him, and neither did he know you. He would move on with his brothers after he reached the city, finding a wife or maybe get shot in a gunfight. He would never think about you again after you parted ways.

You were a little bit surprised as he kissed your cheek: "Don't be stupid.", he started - talking like a gentleman again, like always. "I already told you, you're a good company."

For a few moments, you thought about what you could reply to him. But you had no idea. So you just turned around, holding the ranger, unlocked it, and then you shot on one of the little rocks Ray placed there further. You hit.

As you locked the revolver again, you turned back to the gunslinger, smiling a bit. "No worries, Ray. You can see, I can protect myself."

He started to smile: "I see. And to say it again: I should be the one afraid of you."

The time was passing by really quickly. Ray showed you some moves with the ranger and you got better and better. For the first, your lesson was done and you felt a little bit more safe. Maybe you could indeed stay alive on your own.

As the two of you started to ride into the night, you had to think about his former words. You were angry about yourself, then to be honest: You were a little bit in love with the oldest McCall-Brother. You knew it was stupid because you barely knew him. But you couldn't help your feelings.

Late night you made your decision: You would enjoy the next two days with him, without thinking any further. As soon as you both reach the city, you will go your own way and he will go on his. Maybe you could ride for the Pony Express or do the chores at a bar. You will live your life, he will live his farmer-live and for sure, you will never meet again.

-*-

The next day, you woke up really late. You both were riding until late at night. It was so late, that Ray didn‘t even lit a fire anymore. He was just drinking half a bottle of whiskey until he put himself down and fell into a deep sleep. You weren’t sure if this drunk man could protect you from anyone.

But it didn’t matter anyway. You had to protect yourself.

As you woke up and looked around, Ray was still snoring beneath you. Again he had put an arm around you and was almost snuggling against your back. You had to smile a little bit, watching him lying there so peacefully as if there was no harm in the world. But because the sun was already rising high, you decided to wake him up. He had to go on, his family was waiting for him.

He growled a bit as you softly shook his shoulder. „Girl, I told you not to wake me up in the morning, dammit.“

You laughed a bit. Every day the same procedure. He was a real pain in the ass these mornings: „You have to get up. I think we will make it today to the city.“, you said softly as you fondled his hair strands that were falling into his forehead. He yawned a little and stood up. „You’re right girl, we should hurry up – maybe we make it to town before the night begins.“, he said a bit tired, and grabbed for the saddle of his horse. You felt your heart aching a little bit. Yeah, he seemed to be in a little hurry, he finally wanted to arrive. You were already too long outside here in the wild. You were aching for some good food and a bath with soap, but on the other hand, you didn’t want this special time with Ray to end.

Anyways you both got up on the poor horse, that had to carry both of you for days. For sure, it will also be happy when this journey has ended.

You rode a few miles as you decided to take some rest at a little lake. The mood between Ray and yourself got a little bit strange by now, but you were sure it was all because of you. You didn’t feel like talking a lot today or making fun of stupid things. He seemed to notice this and he also just talked barely – which was very unusual for him, because normally he was as chatty as five old women on a coffee gossip. You got off the horse, taking the flask with you to the lake to fill it up. Ray stood by the horse, losing the saddle belt, so this poor animal could get also some rest. You knelt down by the water, filled the bottle up, and drank a sip of it.

You were a little bit surprised as you heard the sound of hooves behind you. But you weren’t scared – for sure Ray just brought the horse near the water so it could drink. It was a big mistake, not to turn around – you realized, that not Ray was behind you, but a strange man, as he started speaking to you: „Sweetheart, what’re you doin‘ here?“, he stopped the horse, yelling towards you. How could you be so stupid, not turning around? This was definitely not Ray. You turned your head to the strange man before your eyes searched for the McCall. You couldn’t see him. „I asked you something.“, he mumbled, getting off his horse and stumbling towards you.

With quick movements, you got a few steps away from him, but then he already grabbed your arm, pulling you closer to him. „Please, let me go…“, you begged, trying to push yourself away from him – but you only had little effort with that. Where the fuck was Ray? How could he not heard you? „Calm down, sweetie. Let’s have just a little fun.“, he tried to calm you down as he started to untie your shirt. You felt like you had to die. You know what he wanted to do to you. „Please, don’t“, you begged him again, but you already knew, that he won’t stop from your begging. He put his gun out of the holster, holding it to your neck. „Shut up, Sweetheart. Otherwise, I will have to kill you.“, he threatened you with his slurring voice. Immediately you stopped moving, trying to calm down. Just be quiet and don’t fight, then it will be over soon, you said to yourself. But it was hard to calm down because you knew, that this strange and drunk man was about to rape you.

Just imagine it’s having sex with Ray, you thought, but you felt even more disgusted about these thoughts. Cold sweat was running down your temples, as you shut your eyes together as tight as possible.

The stranger understood that you wouldn’t fight and put the gun away. He started to untie your pants with clumsy movements. Tears were running down your cheeks through your closed eyes as you tried not to think about anything. You just hoped that Ray would notice you’ve been away for too long and start looking for you.

As soon as you minded about Ray, you heard the sound of a revolver being shot. Suddenly you opened your eyes, but you only felt the blood from the stranger still holding you covering your face. His tightness loosened as he collapsed behind you, falling harshly to the ground with aching sounds. As soon as he reached the hard and dusty earth, his sounds went quiet.

Without thinking further, you quickly ran some steps away from him. Then you also fell to the ground, crying like a child as you tried to straighten your shirt again. But your hands were too shaky – you weren’t able to do it. You looked up and saw Ray standing in front of you, going down to his knees, like he did the first time you met him. He took you in his embrace, stroking your cheek, as you still whined in his arms. „I’m so sorry, sweetheart.“, he said and you winced at the sound of this nickname because a few moments earlier the stranger called you the same. „It’s my fault, I shouldn’t have left you alone.“

You shook your head. „Is he dead?“, you asked him, as Ray wiped the blood from your cheek with the sleeve of his own shirt. Slowly he nodded: „He won’t hurt you anymore.“

Ray stood up and put himself out of your grip as he went to the motionless body of the stranger, taking his colt and the ammo he had onto his belt. „What the hell are you doing?“, you haven’t finally stopped crying yet, but at least you are able to talk a bit more clearly now. Without any emotion, he shrugged: „He won’t have any use for this stuff anymore. Go ahead, take his horse.“ You knew already that Ray could be ice-cold. But in your state, you were still shocked about his behavior. „Don’t you have any respect for the dead?“, you asked further. Ray growled, going with quick steps towards you: „Did he have any respect for you?“, his voice was loud, he was upset as he told you: „This motherfucker would have raped you and I’m sure, he would've killed you afterwards. And even if he had let you out there alive: be sure you wished you were dead after he was done with you! How about a ‚thank you for saving my life AGAIN, Ray.‘?“

A shiver got through your body because of his loud voice. „Fuck you, Ray.“, you started to cry a little bit more again. His brows furrowed as he looked at you with dark eyes. His lips were pressed together and he didn’t know, what he should do with you. But he knew, it was the wrong way to yell at you. „Would you like me to bury this bastard?“, he asked as he sat himself down beneath you and put an arm around your shoulder. His voice still wasn’t friendly, but at least he stopped barking at you. You shook your head. „Thanks for saving my life again, Ray.“, you said quietly as you leaned yourself against his shoulder. „I’m sorry for yelling at you. I just couldn’t forgive myself if something happened to you. If I only could be around all the time.“, he sighed, resting his head on yours.

„Why do you say this?“, you asked him. „You barely know me.“ You sniffed a bit, wiping your nose on the sleeve of your shirt. He shrugged: „For sure, we don’t know each other very well yet, but I can’t help myself. I just want you to be safe.“, his words were almost too heavy for him. He stood up and lifted you to your feet. „Let’s go, girl. We’ll find another place where we can wash the blood away from your pretty face.“, he comforted you, leading you to the horse, which had recently belonged to the stranger and helping you to get into the saddle.

Your further ride went silent, none of you were talking. You were just enjoying Ray’s company and the calming sound of the hooves of the horses on the ground. You felt safe around him.

The sun started to go down, and you could see the outlines of the city far on the horizon. „Look“, Ray pointed with his finger into the rising darkness. „We almost made it.“

Some tears went down your eyes as you nodded slowly. You didn’t want this time with him to end. And you were still a bit covered in blood from the bastard who was about to rape you. You felt really miserable. Because you didn’t want Ray to see your tears again, you turned your head forward, riding on. „Everything okay, girl?“, he asked a bit surprised. Again you just nodded and weren’t able to say anything. „Look.“, he got with his horse next to you, pulling softly on your arm. „There is a little creek. Let’s rest here for one last time. You can wash the blood of this bastard off you and we can have a drink.“, he told you almost caretaking. Man, this guy REALLY had many faces.

„Thank you.“, you answered him under tears as he took his horse a bit left, riding straight to the little creek. He got off the saddle, waited for you and then tied the horses at a tree near the river. „No worries, girl. You come with me first, let’s search for some wood so we can light a fire.“

You did as he told you and were more than relieved, that he didn’t leave you alone to search for something burnable.  But it didn’t matter – tomorrow you have to be on your own, without him. After the fire burned, he took you to the creek, helping you to get off your clothes. He undressed too, just to sit beneath you in the cold water, rubbing your back and shoulders. „Damn, girl. With you I bathe way more than usual.“, he grinned as he scrubbed some of the blood off your left shoulder. You laughed lightly: „Yeah, I have to say you smell way better than the first time I met you.“

„Good to hear you laugh again, girl. Try not to think about it.“, he replied as he cupped your face with his hands, kissing you softly. You hummed into the kiss and soon you both were lying beneath the fire, making love for the last time of your journey.

-*-

The next day, you both reached the town very early. Ray was told by his brother to take something from a courier, you had to go to the stagecoach, because you wanted to ride for the Pony Express. So your time with Ray came to an end and you already missed him as hell, even if the both of you hadn’t even said ‚goodbye‘ yet.

„Thank you, Ray. For everything you did for me.“, you said, as your eyes started to get watery. You felt one single teardrop running down your cheek. Ray grabbed softly with his hand under your chin and lifted it back up a little. „Don’t cry for me, sweetheart. Look at me, I’m old and ugly. If anyone had to cry here, it would be me.“, he smiled into your face, making you just cry a bit more. „No matter what you do, even if you get married and live with another woman, please don’t forget me Ray.“, now the tears came down your eyes like a waterfall. You weren’t even embarrassed anymore. „Shhh…“, he took you into a strong embrace. „I won’t forget you. I won’t marry. Who should want me?“, he asked again with his crooked smile looking down on you. „Here…“, he grabbed into his saddle bag for some piece of paper and a pen and wrote something in scrawly letters. He handed it to you. „That‘s the address of our farm. Write me. Or visit me one day.“, he said to you. „Are you…“, you sniffed as you started to talk. „Are you even able to read?“, you asked and Ray had to laugh a little. „Barely. Only the most necessary.“, he admitted. „But my brother William can read very well. So please don’t write too fucked up stuff in your letter. He's a preacher.“, you both laughed a bit until his face started to get hard again. „And visit me. As soon as you can.“, he announced.

Poor Ray – if he only knew, that he wouldn’t live anymore on this farm in Georgia. „I will, I promise Ray.“, you said, smiling honestly towards him.

„And…“, again he started, grabbing on his holster. „Take this.“, with these words he handed one of the McCall-Rangers to you. „Ray…“, you stared with disbelief at the weapon. „I can’t take it.“

„Shut up.“, he grinned. „Take it and give it back to me when we meet again. I can’t protect you right now, but my ranger will do.“

„Thank you.“, you said as you put the colt into your bag. You stood up on your tiptoes, to kiss him one last time. Trying to save his taste and his smell.

Tobacco. Whiskey. Sun and Sweat.

„Take care, girl.“, he said, as he turned around and got on his horse. „I won’t forget you, Ray. Goodbye.“

He lifted his hand for goodbye and then he rode away from you. You watched him until he disappeared around the next bend, still having tears in your eyes.

It’s a shame that the next time you will see him, he won’t be the same anymore.

End.

[desertfangs]

"His mind was flooded with images of him and Daniel together: hiking through a jungle, walking through the streets of London, riding on a boat near Night Island, and then standing on a rooftop in New York. Always connected physically, always touching, always together." When I tell you I was not prepared for the way this one paragraph BROKE me. There were real tears. It's always such a special thing when authors describe the intensity of them sharing blood after Daniel's turning, with it being the only way they can get a glimpse into each other's minds. It's bittersweet and poignant and you captured it so beautifully. They really did everything together pls 😭😭😭 Loved that it's set post-QotD as well, it's rare to come across a fic set during that period!

And then there was this: "And in the end, Daniel hadn’t fought him for it. He would have gone if Armand had asked. Would have died in Armand’s arms, content to be with him while he slipped away", and I was fully sobbing lmao yes!!! Daniel would've absolutely died in Armand's arms that night if it had come down to it. Armand was never going to let him die, but Daniel wouldn't have held it against him if he had, and he would've died blissed out, just like he was ready to do so in Pompeii.

You truly get them so well, it's always a pleasure reading you xoxo DA ❤️

Oh my gosh, what a treat to have you in my inbox tonight, DA!! There is definitely too little fic set in the post-QotD period, which is wild to me because it's so full of possibilities! Anne could have written a whole book about the interactions and conversations and resolutions that must have happened there on Night Island. I love fic set in this time and it's really fun to write!

When I tell you I was not prepared for the way this one paragraph BROKE me. There were real tears. It's always such a special thing when authors describe the intensity of them sharing blood after Daniel's turning, with it being the only way they can get a glimpse into each other's minds. It's bittersweet and poignant and you captured it so beautifully.

I'm seriously flattered as heck that it evoked some real tears but also sorry I made you cry. I love them having that connection through the blood. They know each other so well and Daniel was never in Armand's head, so like.. they do actually know how to read each other in many ways and know how the other thinks. But I think Armand especially gets hung up on not being able to have that reassurance from the thoughts in Daniel's brain and Daniel doesn't realize how much he relied on that and so doesn't know to provide him with verbal reassurance, and yeah. It's a THING.

But also like... these images in particular, I think Daniel had some anxiety after he was turned. He was overwhelmed by the beauty and the noise and he's surrounded by other vampires who are mostly much older (except Jesse) and he knows Armand had never turned another, and so I think he has some lowkey trepidation that Armand might be disappointed or unhappy with how he turned out, but he's also just so full of love and awe that he gets to be with Armand forever, so the images are sort of a reassurance to both of them that it's what he wanted and what they both deserve. To be together forever. (Okay, now I'm tearing up.)

and I was fully sobbing lmao yes!!! Daniel would've absolutely died in Armand's arms that night if it had come down to it. Armand was never going to let him die, but Daniel wouldn't have held it against him if he had, and he would've died blissed out, just like he was ready to do so in Pompeii.

Yes! Right? Like I think sometimes Daniel is seen as being desperate and eager for immortality above everything and while he absolutely wanted it (and begged and pleaded for it, and fought with Armand about it), he also wants immortality with Armand. And when he's dying, he doesn't ask for it or beg for it. He doesn't want to die, but he's become kind of become resigned that Armand won't do it (or maybe he finally believes Armand simply cannot allow himself to do it). He's just relieved Armand is there with him and he can talk to him and be held by him and be with the man he loves. 😭

To me it's so important and integral to their story that in the end, he wasn't begging for the blood and that Armand gave it to him despite his vow and fear for what it might mean in the future because they loved each other that much.

Okay, well, it's super dusty in here.

Thank you so much for your message, DA!! Always makes my night to hear from you and I'm hoping you're doing well! 😘

[aeternxm]

❗❗❗gojo for eito pls xoxo

smooches for the muses | @hinodae ( gojo )

softly does he hum as the two of them walk side by side, fingers just barely brushing past with each step they take. the thought had crossed eito's mind many times before now to take gojo by the hand, but each and every time the opportunity presented itself he shied away. eito knew the reason for his own hesitancy, a fear deep-seated within him, one that even now, he fought hard to push down. for so long eito had sworn off love or anything even closely resembling it. he'd seen love at it's best; beautiful and effortless with enough joy to light up a room. but he'd also seen the worst of it; the aftermath of a loved one long since gone. a small child caught in the middle of it, trying desperately to pick up the pieces of a broken mother who had lost the love of her life.

eito had spent most of his years avoiding relationships, to the point that gojo was the first person he'd ever actually gone on a date with. it's almost embarrassing to admit, in fact he hasn't told gojo any of this - doesn't want to scare him off he supposes. but it's only now in moments like these that eito understands a bit more about why people fall in love despite any fears, any hesitancies they may have. because eito is terrified still, even now - but as the sun sets behind them, as gojo turns to look at him with a smile that he's long since grown to adore... he gets it. he gets why people risk it all for moments like these.

eito doesn't know much about love, not really - but with gojo... he thinks he might be willing to learn.

" why are you staring at me like that? " the question is posed with an embarrassed look on eito's face, the dark haired man turning his head to look away - only to be surprised when gojo stops him in his tracks. there's not a word spoken, and somehow that makes it that much more difficult to look the other in the eye. fate is never something he's believed in, but it's hard to maintain that stance when he'd spent his whole life thinking he'd be alone, only for gojo to stumble into his life without so much as a warning - finding a spot in eito's heart and making a home there.

gojo takes a step forward, breath hitching in eito's throat as he takes a step back in turn. it's instinct that drives him in moments like this, not fear. it's second nature for him to shy away from affection - a conscious effort to allow himself to enjoy gojo in any capacity. his back hits a tree softly, a brief flash of panic, of uncertainty as gojo closes that gap between them. eito feels like he might faint, his heart is beating so fast. but despite the panic, there's... hope. he doesn't know what the other is trying to do but he knows deep down that he would never do anything eito wasn't comfortable with.

deep brown eyes flicker to meet the other's gaze, a brilliant blue staring at him and eito thinks, if only for a moment, he could get lost in those eyes if given the chance. " satoru-- " a questioning infliction of the other's name, and it's the way gojo says his name in kind that sends him reeling.

it's not like eito has never been kissed before - of course he has. but there's something about the way that gojo approaches it that makes it feel brand new again. a hand cradling his face, the briefest of moments where they part only to share a look before diving back in. eito feels himself relax, leaning further into the kiss and inviting gojo in closer. one hand ghosts over gojo's own while the other rests on his shoulder, pulling him just that little bit closer.

eito's surprised by his own actions by the time they break apart, though still pressed close together. eito tries to say something, anything -- but the words won't form, trapped on the tip of his tongue. " i-- " he sighs softly, a smile tugging at the corners of his lips. he can't deny that gojo makes him feel a certain type of way, can't deny that he doesn't enjoy these little moments of shared intimacy. but it's a difficult thing to admit just how scared he is to lose it all now that he has it.

" if you think a kiss is going to get you out of putting up the tent tonight, you've got another thing coming. " it's eito who initiates the kiss this time around, surprising even himself. it's a peck, nothing more - but the way he lingers there afterwards, almost goading the other to kiss him... that's bold, even for eito.

" now come on, i gave you a free pass last time because you didn't know how. no excuses this time. "

[rubyperic-09]

In Love

a/n: I wrote a whole ass novel about a year ago and I thought I'd release the first chapter to see if anyone likes it! let me know if you want me to release any more of it or if you have any feedback xoxo summary: idk, this is a preview to the whole book I guess but idk how to sum it up, anyone got any ideas? w/c: 1114 TW: vomit, mentions of alcohol usage, mentions of being drunk, mentions of bullying, hospital, mentions of mental breakdowns. let me know if I've missed anything xx

chapter 1

I wake up lying on the floor of my bedroom. I have no idea why I am there. The last thing I remember is throwing up in a plant pot and being brought home by Henry’s boyfriend Michael. I got drunk at a party last night. So drunk that I passed out and had to be dragged home. I only got drunk because I had a crap week and I wanted to forget about it. But obviously that didn’t work. I get up off the floor and put on a jumper. I have a pounding headache, but that does not stop me from struggling up the stairs and into Henry’s room. Michael was still here. I did not expect him to drive all the way home in the dark, but I also didn’t expect him to be sleeping in my brother’s bed while my parents were under the impression he was on the spare mattress on the floor.

I am Ivy Green. I have a brother named Henry, who came out to my parents around three months ago, but still hadn’t come out to me until about a week ago. Henry was my best friend for about three years. We did everything together. If there was another one of Lilly Scott’s stupid Halloween parties, we went together with corresponding costumes. Henry and I went to the same school for the entire of primary school, and majority of high school. But then we moved. I stayed in Brisbane, Queensland, for the rest of my eleventh year and lived with my girlfriend Lilly. While Henry moved with my parents to Melbourne, Victoria, and was home-schooled for the rest of year nine. This was not something my brother enjoyed, but he didn’t have much choice. It was either be home-schooled or be half a semester behind in his schooling. So, he obviously chose to home-school.

I moved back in with my family about a month ago, so it hasn’t really been that long. It was nothing like I had expected. I don’t know what I had expected but it wasn’t this. The city was so “small” compared to Brisbane, and I didn’t know anyone. In fact, I still barely know anyone. I barely even know my brother at this point. I always got the sense that something was different about my brother; Ever since he was little, he didn’t “fit in” with the other kids at school. He was always spending time with me because no-one in his year liked him very much. This did not turn out very well for my brother. For majority of Henry’s first high school year, he was bullied for hanging out with me. He was always getting into fights and picked last in groups at school, but he knew how to defend himself. Or at least I thought he did.

Last year when we were in Brisbane my mum got a call from the school. She unsuspectingly answered the phone with a happy look on her face, but that changed very quickly. Her expression darkened and her voiced changed from, cheerful to serious and worried. In a matter of seconds, she had dragged me out to the car grabbed a whole lot of random things including, my brother’s favorite book, my laptop, her laptop, a bunch of important paperwork, her phone, and a group of other things you might need to keep yourself sane. She was on the phone to my father at the same time as driving. I had no idea what she was saying, but she sounded worried, which doesn’t happen very often, and that made me worried.

My brother had gotten into a fight with some of the year eleven boys in my class. They were teasing him for hanging out with my friend Lilly and saw the perfect opportunity to hurt someone and they took it. My brother fought back until he was hit in the head with a book and passed out. He would have been fine… If he hadn’t fallen directly into the garden fence. He still has the scars to prove it, but I can’t help thinking that it was all my fault. He is fine now, but he couldn’t breathe properly for months and that’s when my parents decided to move us across the country. We had spent over two hours in the waiting room of that hospital; My brother spent around three weeks in there though, and didn’t go back to school for another couple of months after that. He didn’t go back to school until he was in Melbourne. And even then, he still hadn’t gone back to school. He had just been schooling at home.

Getting back home after nine months was weird. I felt like I’d barely even met the kid I was best friends with. I had felt like a complete outsider in my own home. It didn’t feel like home for about two weeks. But something had changed about my brother’s relationship with my dad. They were always in arguments about stupid unimportant things. Such as whether or not Michael was allowed to sleepover, or if he was allowed to go over to Michael’s, or if he was allowed to go out with his “friend”, things that I had thought were silly because my dad had let me do all the same things with my friends at his age, but something had changed about the way they saw each other, like they didn’t see eye to eye anymore.

My brother had multiple mental breakdowns the week he came out to me. He was at Michael’s a lot and stopped asking my dad if he could go before leaving, he just said, I am going to Michael’s, and you’re not going to stop me, before walking out the door and slamming it shut behind him. I had no idea why my dad got so mad at him for wanting to hang out with a friend. I was completely clueless and had no idea why this was happening, but it all makes sense now. Michael wasn’t just my brother’s best friend; he was his boyfriend. And I had no idea he was gay.

For like 5 years I just thought he was a nerd, but he said he has always known and was simply confused, but that it all made sense to him now. He didn’t want to have to lie to people and pretend he was someone he wasn’t, just because he feared what people would say or do to him. It was only a matter of seconds before I hugged him and told him I will always love him, but he has still been avoiding me since.

a/n: this whole book is based in Australia and uses Australian spelling and grammar because that's where I grew up and currently live, so it's easier for me to base things on environment wise... also, tis was written in my heartstopper era and is probably got somewhat of a similar story line at the beginning of the book, the book does develop later though xoxo -💎

[tonixe]

PUPPETEER

A/N: Happy New Year besties, and I hope your mclovin it, setting up goals. I'm wrapping everything in bows and ribbons, #in my coquette era. Anyway, I'm standing on business, and I will be Coriolanus number-one wife, he told me, TRUST ...This fic is also inspired by @wh0reforcoriolanussnow. And I hope you all have a wonderful new year and a healthy year, xoxo.

WARNING: p in the v, penetration, forced marriage, forced pregnancy, creampie, choking, groping, abuse of power, cigarette usage, alcohol, vomit, non-con to dub-con, gr**ming and breeding...Reader discretion advised + DDDNE.

PAIRING: President!Coriolanus x nymphet!reader

WORD COUNTER: 3.1k

You were innocent so sweet, pure like a dove, and sweet as honey. You smelt like tulips and cinnamon. You had bright shiny f/c hair and sparkly e/c eyes. An infectious smile was always on your lips when you smiled at or saw him. You were a real-life painting of beauty, you were young, free, and impressionable. But you had a disgusting attitude, that was the main thing, feisty..he would've mistaken you for a district girl if it wasn't for your rich lifestyle and luxurious clothes you wear.

You were a cliche, stereotypical rich girl. You were rotten, spoiled if he dared to say. He would describe you as a bimbo or a stunner but surprising… you were smart and capable..popular with your peers. Though you had a horrible smoking habit, it wasn't any day you didn't have a cigarette between your plump lips, sniggering with your 'Friends'.

Maybe that's why he picked you, with all the pros and cons of having you in a matrimonious agreement. You were a candidate to be his wife and carry his children, of course, if you weren't going to put up a fight, but Coriolanus was sure that even if were to fight, he was going impregnate you with his seed.

The first time you heard of getting married to him by your mother, your father of course was away in some sort of business meeting. You were in disbelief, a distraught expression on your face…"Y/N..sweetie..you are getting married to him, this opportunity would help the family gratefully" Your mother pleaded with you, you leaned on one of the sofa chairs as you lit up a cigarette between your lips. Your mother hated the habit, that you picked up by your father, she thought it was unladylike and improper.

"No, I'm not" You quickly dismissed her, rolling your eyes as she repeated herself several times, "Y/n, it's not an offer..your going to marry him" She repeated herself again but with sternness, "No, I'm not" you glared, taking another hit of the cigarette, blowing it purposely in her face. Her face getting redder by the second at your rude gestures. Here you were sitting down, and having a tantrum in Dr. Gaul's office. She didn't say anything yet, just watching as you and your mother fought with each other.

"Y/N, I'm not sure why you're being such a brat, there is an opportunity right in front of you and you're not taking it..this can help us..your family..A LOT!" She argues you roll your eyes at her, looking another way. Before Dr. Gaul spoke up, your attention was on her…"Y/N..this opportunity comes once in a lifetime, becoming the First Lady of Panem is a powerful title" Dr. Gaul says, her hands tapping onto her wooden desk, you pursed your lips…"Besides, your schedule has been cleared for the whole day, and he will be here soon, make sure not to offend or disrespect him…it would be a good look at all" She finishes, and you roll your eyes at her.

You hated that you weren't controlling your life at this point, being forced to marry a man you never knew or cared for, until now. You just sat there smoking your frustrations away as you waited. Staring at the Big Ben clock as the hand moved. You waited, tapping the cigarette ashes onto the ashtray, your mother saying something to you that you ignored as she pressed the issue to you even further.

Exhaling the smoke from your lungs, your ears heard the click of the door, hearing footsteps coming into the office. "President Snow!" you listened to your mother's voice as she purposely made it higher than her already annoying pitch. You watched as Coriolanus and your mother shook hands. She had a sickeningly sweet smile on her face when she looked at him.

"Nice to see you again, Audrey" Coriolanus greeted her. You watched angrily, taking out the almost-finished cigarette from your mouth. Your eyes shifted to Dr. Gaul as Coriolanus also greeted her before he glanced towards your way. You ignore the stares of his blue irises. You felt your cheeks flush, tapping the end of the cigarette near the ashtray. "-And this is Y/N, right?" you felt his eyes on you, in return you gave him a nasty look, already pissed off with his presence and the future event that was being planned in front of you.

Your mother noticed as she carefully stepped towards you, flicking you harshly on the shoulder, and making you grimace.

You gave up resisting with your mother's eyes digging into you, "Yes, President Snow..." You swallowed your pride, enunciating every word in your sentence, making him amused by your actions. You didn't look at him, as you said it..looking down at the ashtray with the burnt ashes of the remains of the cigarette inside of it.

The rest of the meeting was your mother, and Coriolanus, talking about the marriage arrangement in front of you, you were livid by the action..and Dr. Gaul joined into the conversation, saying something, you blurred out and the whole conversation in general. You tapped your foot out in frustration, crushing the cigarette in the tray. You knew your parents just wanted to get rid of you, you would admit that you did do something that wasn't expected of you with your parents but to your defense, they never reprimanded you for any of it.

In this moment, you felt desperate, hopeless, and vulnerable...you were still a kid, a child.

But there wasn't any avail as the months would flip by and your 18th birthday would come, to be married off to the President of Panem and your induction following in as the First Lady, and soon child carrying without even enjoying your youth, becoming a mother, while your peers are relishing their freedom. It sounded like torture to you, made you angry and sad. You felt tears blurring your vision as you got up from your seat, the action being noticed by your mother and others in the room.

Marching out of the office, no.. running out of the office. The sound of your mother yelling for you. You ran out of the building, with your bag in your hand, reaching inside for another cigarette but there were any inside the box, "Fuck" you screamed out in frustration, throwing the box back into your bag, and resorting to a flask. Taking a sip of the alcoholic liquid, it was warm outside, the sun on your skin. It was relaxing, cooling your mood down. Sliding down to the floor, your knee pressed to your chest.

You don't know how much time passed but you wanted it to stop..sniffling to yourself. Your ears picked up on the sound moving near you as you looked to the side, your heart dropped at the sight of Coriolanus Snow in front of you, the man that would take you away from your childhood, your home, and your youth. But you give props to your parents, marrying you to a man who was handsome not as old which was something you were happy about. Just a six-year age gap between you both.

"Looking for this?" You watched as he reached into his pocket, throwing a pack of cigarettes, he almost laughed looking at your face lighting up, holding the box with your fingers. "Thank you," you said, looking up at him...you opened the box putting the cigarette in your lips, covering the end of the cigarette with the lighter lighting up the end. Blowing the smoke, as you held the cigarette between your fingers, sniffling. "Can I sit here with you?" He asked, you looked at him as you nodded. The man sat with you, you bit your bottom lip, as you took another hit of the cigarette. The nicotine cools down your nerves..."So, how is the school doing?" He asked you rolled your eyes at his question, he sounded like your dad..and you cringed at the thought, blowing the smoke, "Good" you responded, putting your head in your hands.

"It's not going to be all that bad, Y/N" He started speaking again, which made you groan, he shifted closer to you, putting his hand on your back. You wanted to revolt, moving away but you really need someone to comfort you, leaning into his touch. As you put your head in his chest, laying down as he rubbed your shoulder. You even know tears were rolling down your cheek, sniffling in your seat, he kissed you on the head, soothing your pain.

It was ironic, that the man you wanted to run away from, was comforting you.

God, you wanted to scream but you sat there, sniffling as you inhaled the nicotine through the cigarette and exhaled through your nose, tapping it onto the ground. His words were comfortable, whether empty or not, you took them as it was.

Coriolanus didn't mind that you laid your head on his chest, he quite appreciated it, your calmness made something inside of him unlock..your vulnerability stroked his ego, especially with your feisty nature.

Days passed, and you found yourself getting comfortable with Coriolanus. He would take you out on little dates, and buy your gifts and jewelry... that he would always put around your neck, the cold steel hitting your chest, the memory made you smile, with joy when you opened the luxurious satin case. The thought of marrying and sacrificing everything you had did get on the edge, and you still were uncomfortable at all with it, but you saw him as a friend more as a lover.

Your parents, mostly your mother encouraged you to speak and talk to him, even sending letters. You always catch yourself writing them for god knows why, but you felt comfort about doing it, and having him read it.

You found yourself visiting him in his residence, as you joined him for his afternoon tea. Something that you didn't do often with your own parents but liked when it was with Coriolanus. He would surprise you with delicious cakes, macarons, and cookies...with him looking at you cutely stuffing your cake with the sweet desserts, your eyes sparkling in joy, it made him chuckle at your cute antics.

But soon..your birthday came around. Your stomach was full of butterflies, you dreaded it. You were finally 18, you had your cake, your claps, and Coriolanus slipped the ring on your finger. The bells of marriage chimed. Looking at yourself in the mirror, a poofy, lacy wedding dress, your hair styled, and makeup done. You looked like a doll, a baby doll you used to play with when you were young.

The dress was pretty, white, lacy imprinted with snowflakes, big and poofy, you had a sweetheart neckline and a diamond necklace on your neck, matching earrings as well. A veil topped your doll-like appearance, as several maids helped you with your dress. The whole population of Panem waiting, watching the wedding ceremony, you felt sick, nauseous and it was evident on your face...the headmistress noticed it, she was an older woman, much older than you..placing her hand on your shoulder, catching your attention, "It will be over soon, just smile for the camera..okay?" She murmured, fixing your veil, nodded at her words, and that was all that you could do now.

Walking down the aisle is lock and key for you...fisting up your hands, narrowing your eyes, some of the maids said something, and next thing you knew, you were walking down the aisle with your father. People that you knew looking at you, some were your peers and others were important, influential people of the Panem, your eyes explored everywhere and then to Coriolanus, who stood there..waiting for you.

"Chin up, and smile Y/N" your father whispered to you,

You breathed out, fixing up your posture..everything felt slow, soon your father handed you off, and you stepped into your destine spot, looking at Coriolanus. You never notice how tall he was, though older, he was much taller, a few inches you assumed.

The priest said something, it was a blur. "I do" the word coming out of Coriolanus snapping you out, looking at the Priest, then at him. "-And you Y/N, do you take Coriolanus Snow as your lawfully wedded husband, to have and to hold, from this day forward and the next..***#$&@*@*@@*$**..-sickness and health...to love and cherish until death do you part?" Your eyes widen at the weird noises coming from the priest's mouth, you hesitate, looking around you..your chest heaving. Your parents looked at you sternly, "I-..i do" You stuttered, "-And with that, you may kiss the bride" The Priest announced.

Coriolanus brought your body close, as his lips connected with yours..your ears ringing out with the sounds of claps and applause. Tears rolling down your cheek,

Your ears rang out, through the rest of the ceremony, the after-party and the kiss...the sound of the door clicking, looking down at your body in a nightgown, in your new residents shared with Coriolanus..where you would live, where your children live and spend your days in. Coriolanus's feet dragged towards you, and your heart pounced against your chest, looking at his half-naked form..." Is this when we" you paused gesturing the rest of your sentence with your hand, your eyes deliberately not looking at him.

You felt sad, disgusting, and vulnerable.

He saw it all over your face, it was obvious.

He preferred it,

You had a twinge of anger through your body, as you observed the smug smirk on his face, you didn't want to end it without a fight. His hand caressing your cheek, you soften at the sight of him, knowing his status and power, it would be a useless sight of retaliation.

He laid you down on your back, his hands dancing on your skin, creeping up under your nightgown, touching you...your eyes couldn't bear but stare. He slowly stripped you off of your nightgown, you were already naked underneath it. Your body is displayed for him, his finger touching and groping your body..you inhale through your nose looking at the ceiling.

His fingers getting dangerously close to your pearl..you instantly held his arm, "Please, be gentle" you whispered, making eye contact with him, as he nodded, releasing his arm. His fingers slipped into your folds, exploring inside you, making you squirm underneath him...sinful moans slipped from your lips at his actions. You looked innocent, lewd, and vulnerable underneath him, it made him get hard and aroused...his fingers scissoring you, his right hand on your chest, rubbing the nubs gently making you whimper. His weight lying on top of you, his fingers spreading your folds, and his fingers digging deep inside you, arching your back at the sensation. His lips leaving kisses from your neck to your collarbone.

Delicate moans left your lips, your hands gripping the sheets. Your skin prickling, your walls squeezing his finger...his groans echoing through your ears. You felt breathless, your breathing getting heavier.

"Corio..i'm close" you sniffled, holding his arm lightly, as his finger made his way into you, every thrust made you closer to coming undone. A throbbing sensation in your abdomen, driving you crazy, the lewd noises of your cunt reverberating around the room.

"Good" He whispered against your skin, the pace of his finger digging into you, your hand instantly gripping his shoulder, your nails digging in deep, making him groan. You felt a coil snapping within you, waves of pleasure, arching your back...your eyes rolling to the back of your head, moans ripping out of your throat. "Corio.." you looked at him through your lashes, your eyes heavy as you stared at him. His fingers withdrawing from your dripping pussy, your cum coating his fingers. Feeling your cheeks reddened..."Open your mouth" He said, you obeyed, laying his coated fingers on your tongue, your tongue swirling around his digits. You felt embarrassed in yourself, his eyes looking down at you, opening your mouth as he took his finger.

He opened your legs, smearing his salvia-coated finger on your thighs...your eyes followed as you held the position, taking off his pants along with his boxers. Your eyes widen in surprise at his size, "C-corio, it's not going to fit" you stuttered, looking away from him.

As he lines up against your slit, you pursed your lips as he slid his cock inside of you, biting your lip at the pain. He hooked your legs on his shoulder, thrusting into you, his hands groping your chest...tears blooming on your waterline at the discomfort, the simmering pain as he forced himself further into you. His groans tainting your ears,

Your breast bounces at every thrust, your vision heavy with lust, fluttering your lashes with tears in your waterline. He bares his teeth, leaving bites on your collarbone, you moan at the touch.

His cock bullying its way to your cervix, as he plunges his cock into you, your hands gripping under the bedsheets...his pace getting faster, and your skin getting a familiar hot feeling tingling inside of you. His pelvis collided with yours, pushing your head back as you moaned, his cock stretching you out. Your chest heaving, your skin beading with sweating, the bed sheet sticking onto your skin..." Corio...I'm so close" you began slurring your words in bliss.

His pace gets faster and sloppier, leaning into you, and giving you a hot, sloppy kiss. His tongue explores your mouth, moaning against his tongue.

Feeling yourself coming undone, as you moaned in pleasure...his thrust getting slower, his groans ringing into your ear before you felt himself spilling his load into you. The hot sensation made you wince,

Your heavy breathing echoed in his ear, as his weight on your body, his cock still burrowed inside of you.

Your eyes flickered down at the sheet between your thighs that was stained in your virgin blood.

A couple of days passed from the intimate engagement you had with Coriolanus. In those days, you were moved into Coriolanus's residence. Beginning the induction of the new title you were going to be given. In those days you began to experience sickness, holding your stomach..your actions were detected by the headmistress.

Your heels stepping on the tile, you felt your stomach hurting even further, feeling nauseous. You fell to your knees, heaving the contents on your stomach, vomiting on the delicate tile floor...hearing the steps of the headmistress, your eyes looking up at the women.

Her face was nonchalant at the scene, "Your pregnant, my lady" she declared..you felt your heart dropping, but you couldn't say anything as threw up on the floor. The sounds of vomit echo through the manor, sitting there, the disgusting smell filling up your senses.

Before the headmistress yelled for another maid to clean up the mess. Another two took you up gently from the floor, you wanted to cry at the new information given to you..you were baring a child in your body that you didn't wish for. But for now, you were being dragged on your feet to your chambers, waiting for the knowledge to be sent to President Snow.

[filthy-reckless-rp]

♛ Spotted on the Upper East Side…

Name: Rebecca Ravenwood Pronouns: She/Her Age: 45 years old Hometown: Up To Player Occupation: Actor Social Status: Insider Faceclaim suggestion: Jessica Chastain

Who Is Rebecca?

“New to town with a made up name, in the angel’s city, chasing fortune and fame.”

Rebecca Ravenwood- I’m holding for the applause! You’re an inspiration, an icon. You fought tooth and claw to get to where you are now, destroying anyone who dared think about ruining you (I can relate). You’ve never fully trusted anyone, not even your nearest and dearest. You rely on yourself, always keeping a distance in your relationships. You could never relax, you could never settle, always working to protect your reputation and your work. At times, you’ve let your success get in the way of other people’s feelings, including your precious daughter’s. No judgement here, promise. To your public, you’re perfect! Never a hair out of place, a photo that wasn’t proofed, a project that isn’t lucky to have you. Behind closed doors? Let me know. XOXO ---Gossip Girl

A Little Extra

Up To Player (two paragraphs of biography; helpful key points listed below - message if you’d like to make any changes or note in the app if you’d rather the bio written up  for you!)  

Rebecca Ravenwood is an iconic actor and a member of the incredibly famous ‘brat pack’. Rebecca, Johnny, Diana and Jamie were the up-and-coming stars of their time. They all had their biggest break on a soapy teen drama that had more twists and turns than you could keep up with. Rebecca is publicly very grateful for her big break but does remind the press that she’s long moved on.

Still actively working as an actor, Becca immediately declined the offer to join ‘Friday Night Bites’ with her fellow ‘brat pack’. It wasn’t until she had word that Jamie had said yes, she reconsidered over a late night glass of wine. Nostalgia is a bitch and now she’s signed a contract.

Having Roni when she was young, her career still taking off, caused a lot of complications for Rebecca. She started to cut off her friends, starting a new life with her daughter and husband. She focused on her work, she wanted to keep building a life for herself and Roni. Rebecca could only count on herself, that’s how it would always be.

Rebecca can be cold, calculating and cut to the bone when she wants to. She isn’t afraid to do what needs to be done, she isn’t afraid to be the ‘bad guy’. She’ll stab you in the back with her stiletto and then go on to host an award show with a smile. Rebecca can be ruthless.

But Becca can also be silly and fun. She can be playful and sweet. She used to play pranks on set when she was young. She’d insist on a round of shots for the whole group, drag everyone to karaoke and out sing everyone there! She spent a long time perfecting a character, she isn’t sure who the ‘real’ Rebecca is anymore.

What Does Gossip Girl Have On Them?

Veronica broke up with her boyfriend, Sam Watts, before they should have both been heading to college. She came home to L.A, with a secret. Roni was pregnant. Becca knew she had to keep the scandal- the secret- under wraps for as long as possible. They were already going through a divorce- Becca and Roni’s dad (who had been unfaithful)- and keeping the media at bay was a full time job. Rebecca arranged for the adoption- it was for the best. Also up to player (if applicable; alternatively you can note their thoughts on Gossip Girl’s return!)

Connections

Veronica Ravenwood - Rebecca’s whole world, her daughter. Not that she’s ever been able to articulate these feelings to her. Rebecca’s relationship with Veronica is turbulent, it’s complicated. Rebecca never knew how to be a mom, she only knew to protect Roni, to do what’s best (right?). 

Jamie Park - ‘brat pack’ member and one of Rebecca’s oldest companions. Becca always had a way of getting under Jamie’s skin. They were together on and off a lot before Becca had Veronica (and some times after). They either loved or hated each other with no in between. Becca could never really let Jamie love her.

Johnny Akana - ‘brat pack’ member, Johnny and Becca were always at each other’s throats when they were young. They were either arguing or laughing, screaming or dancing together. They haven’t spoken since Roni was little. 

Diana Watts - fellow ‘brat pack’ member. Becca lost touch with almost everyone years ago. Diana was never afraid to call Becca out when needed but they loved each other. They all did. Secretly, they once had a romantic tryst but agreed to keep it under wraps so they didn’t hurt Johnny and Jamie. 

[gurugirl]

To the anon who sent the ask about finding out her fling/man has a gf… girl, I’ve been in your position several times and I know how hard it can be! It’s awful & conflicting especially when you have a good connection to the person. I will be straight up & admit that one time I decided not to care so I can’t judge at all! I had just turned 19, had just been broken up with over text by the guy I was dating for 3 yrs because he said he had been cheating on me for basically the last year of our relationship, shortly after his friends told me it had been for longer than that. So I was hurt & angry at everyone & decided I didn’t care and I just gave in to one of my coworker/friend’s advances. And I had so much fun & no remorse at the time for what I was doing after a while. We did this for about 4 almost 5 years. He & the girl got married shortly after I told him I couldn’t do it anymore & he still called me drunk on his wedding day (we hadn’t spoke in a year by then) saying that he needed to know how much he cared about me for him to be calling me on his wedding day. That fucked me up because I thought maybe I should’ve fought harder for him? But thankfully, I blocked him, let it go, & him too. I am now 28 & just barely healed from that relationship. I finally talked about it in therapy I was too embarrassed to admit it before but it was like a burden had been lifted. After that I told a mutual friend & she was so loving and supportive, & non judgmental about it. It helped me stay strong & prompted me to work on forgiving myself.

Anyway…Obviously, I deeply regret it all & wish I hadn’t done it but not because of him or her. I wish I had not done it for me & all the damage I caused myself. The thing that was hardest to recover was my self love & my respect for myself. I loathed myself for allowing myself to do that & hurt someone else the way I had been hurt. Even if they had a happy ending, I just couldn’t forgive myself for a few years & finally did this year. Like you, I had those icky feelings at first but I ignored them and they stopped happening so fast. It’s a slippery slope! So my only advice for you, after going through all that is to choose yourself. Don’t think about him, or his gf, think about yourself and how this will impact you. Think about how you deserve someone’s whole love. Not just pieces of spare time. I know it’s scary & hard to put your foot down, but you will save yourself a lot of heart ache & shame down the line. You deserve all the love & care in world! So please be gentle & kind to yourself for the one slip up, we all make mistakes! The important thing is to learn from them. Wishing you all the best 🩷🩷

I love this advice! Thank you for sharing your story about this situation. It really puts things into perspective. It’s not a simple as just saying stop doing it because you know it’s wrong already. It’s more about - think of how this will make you perceive yourself later on. Doing what’s right for yourself and staying true to your own moral code is going to be more important in the end.

I’m sorry you went through all that. Matters of the heart are so so tricky. It would be nice if things were black and white but emotions are rarely nice enough to put into a tidy box and say that a, b, & c are going to happen if you do this or that. It just doesn’t work that way unfortunately.

Xoxo

[ithappensblog]

happy birthday

Today as we prepare to celebrate your fifth birthday, I'm having trouble wrapping my head around how five whole years have passed us.

You were a cherished wish, a begged-for miracle, and a battle fought with unwavering determination. You occupied our thoughts for years before your existence graced our lives, and the privilege of loving you for this extended duration feels like an incredible dream turned into reality.

You share the same face I had as a child, which is like looking in a mirror somedays. While our features bear a striking resemblance, you are an entirely unique individual, crafted from the finest qualities of those who surround you. Your father's exquisite, sweeping eyelashes and Oma Margot's heart-shaped lips grace your face with their beauty. A subtle flat spot on your ear mirrors that of your older brothers. Those luxurious, untamed copper-brown curls owe their existence to the legacy of all your grandmothers. Without a doubt, you are an exceptionally beautiful young lady.

Beyond your outward appearance, what truly sets you apart is your unparalleled kindness and compassion. You possess a remarkable thoughtfulness that extends to everyone you encounter, and an unwavering desire to lend a helping hand wherever it's needed. Your smile has the power to illuminate even the dimmest corners of a room, while your laughter, resonating from the depths of your soul, has the incredible ability to turn the darkest days into moments of light. Your hugs, warm and comforting, possess the remarkable capacity to heal the deepest wounds. My sweet girl, you have been my savior in countless ways, enriching my life beyond measure. I will be forever grateful that the universe chose me to be your mother. My heart overflows with gratitude for you, and the extraordinary gift of your precious little soul.

As more years unfold, my deepest hope is that you come to fully understand the dedication we pour into creating the most beautiful life imaginable for you. We devote ourselves to ensuring your childhood surpasses our own, crafting cherished memories and extraordinary family moments. Above all else, our greatest desire is for you to know how loved you are. To continually radiate the boundless happiness you bestow upon everyone you encounter, and find that same happiness walking down the path the universe presents to you. May you always be truly, authentically, unapologetically, yourself.

Happiest of birthdays to you, my little turkey. I love you dearly.

Mama

xoxo

[letstalkaboutshtufff]

Hello! I like your idea of Gojo x student reader! (Thank you for making it platonic!)

Can I request Gojo seeing his precious students fight (not in the playful banter they usually do, I’m talking real animosity and beef) with each other and him stepping in and IMMEDIATELY shutting it down. Cause 1. No fighting in his classroom, and 2. He hates seeing tension between his babies!

I can see him being the mediator, and calming everybody down. De escalating the situation.

Warnings: Mentions of death, curses. Language.

"You should've tried harder" that was it. The spark that was needed to light the oily rags of tension in the room. A failed mission. Dead innocents. Devastated students. Emotions were bound to explode at some point.

"What the hell did you just say?"

"I said" they stood up, their whole body tensed in a way you'd never seen before.

"You should have fought harder! If you did maybe those kids would still be alive!"

"Y-you YOU THINK I DIDN'T TRY HARD ENOUGH?! WHAT GIVES YOU THE RIGHT TO SAY THAT HUH?!"

"I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU'RE BLAMING ME WHEN YOU WEREN'T EVEN THE ONE THERE"

"Guys stop! Fighting like this isn't going to solve anything!"

"Tch, always the level head huh, it pisses me off you know, sometimes I wonder if you even care, or just putting on an act!"

"What?! How can you say that?! Of course I care!"

"If you care so much, how could you let something like this happen huh?!"

"Do you think you blaming us is helping?! You weren't there how could you possibly understand what it was like fighting that curse!!"

"I UNDERSTAND THAT IF I WAS THERE I WOULDN'T HAVE GIVEN UP!"

"GIVEN UP?! WE DIDN'T GIVE YOU YOU ASSHOLE WE WERE BEATEN DOWN AND ALMOST DIED!!"

"YOU SHOULD HAVE FOUND A WAY, THATS WHAT BEING A JUJUTSU SORCERER IS ALL ABOUT, IF YOU CAN'T EVEN PROTECT A COUPLE KIDS WHAT GIVES YOU THE RIGHT TO EVEN BE SORCER-ACK"

*Punch*

"!!"

"YOU THINK IF YOU WERE THERE IT WOULD'VE MADE A DIFFERENCE?!, YOU'RE JUST LIKE THE REST OF US, SO GET OFF YOUR FUCKING HIGH HORSE AND STOP RUNNING YOUR DAMN MOUTH"

"YOU REALLY PISS ME OFF YOU KNOW THAT!"

-Rears arm to punch.

-Theres a whooshing sound but no one is paying attention.

"Enough" a deadly and calm voice suddenly ordered.

Dangerously serious eyes.

Eyes that made everyone pause.

A rare moment from Satoru Gojo.

His students could do whatever the hell they wanted except one thing. And that was fight amongst themselves.

He was hardly serious for anything in his life. But he wouldn't tolerate this, so the moment he overheard what was going on, he intervened.

And all it took was a few words.

"Enough, go back to your rooms. Now. We'll talk tommorow" perhaps if his eyes weren't sending piercing arrows, someone would have argued. But no one did.

Instead they withdrew with sunken forms and left. Tommorow he would talk with them all. Explain that it was no ones fault and that fighting amongst each other placing blame was never a good idea. Tommorow he would be back to his silly self, and buy them food after the serious discussion. But today? Today he was serious Sensei Gojo who wouldn't tolerate fighting. After all, your comrades are often the only family you'll ever have...and to be honest, he hated seeing his babies fight...

***********

Hope this was ok! I wrote it in a bit of a different style, that way u can imagine who is saying what. It was lowkey funny writing the yelling lmao

Please lemme know what you thought! And also don't be shy to request more xoxo💕🥰