#it feels messy and misjudged

[badxwolf]

I really like the fact that Ruby’s mum is an ordinary human woman. I think it’s a lovely resolution for Ruby and a great example of Russell’s thesis statement for his Doctor Who. “Ordinary people can do incredible things” and all that.

I really don’t like the fact that Russell spent the last eight episodes making this reveal out to be the biggest most fantastical mystery box ever only to try and turn it on the audience like “aha! you made her important but actually she’s ordinary!’ No Russell, YOU made her important. You made her face obscured by seemingly magical means. You made her point at a street sign to name her daughter when nobody could possibly have seen that. You made Ruby have a Christmas carol in her heart and gave her the ability to conjure snow out of thin air. You made Maestro terrified of her and Sutekh obsessed with her. And then you chose not to explain any of that. What were we supposed to do? Not care? You can’t create a mystery box that can only be explained via something extraordinary and then reveal it to be mundane. You can’t have both.

[satorurize]

Gojo is a little crazy crax when it comes to you, or rather when he's in love. He never really was the type to have his feelings completely sorted. Sure, he had a resilient mind but he's a little messy with his emotions, in a sense that he finds it difficult to display the emotions that are particularly vulnerable, and there is nothing more vulnerable than a person who's deeply in love with someone.

Perhaps that's what it was, that unreachable stance he had conquered with his infinity, his god-like status that was shoved onto him by the Jujutsu society—that led him to reject you, holding onto his stoicism even as he wanted to accept your confession and make you his, finally. But duty calls, especially when you're a weapon.

So why does he follow your route to work, and the one you take back home, watching from the shadows? Curiosity. He convinced himself (that's a lie)

There was no viable explanation to why he was jerking off to a picture of you in a blue attire. His favourite colour. He "reasoned" that he was simply horny and not thinking straight. (He lied to himself for the second time)

So why does he show up at your house 2 weeks after—rationalising and mulling over the fact that rejecting you was the best decision because it guaranteed keeping you safe. (Leaving aside him stalking you on a regular basis.)

Then he realises that happened to misjudge, miscalculate the consequences of his decision.

So he acts like nothing ever happened, leaving you angry and confused as he gently caresses your cheek while his other finds it's way to wrap around your waist while audaciously burying his face into your neck and even plant a kiss on the sensitive nape of your neck, not even addressing the questions of why and how that dared to fall out your lips.

He had brought you to his side of the glass wall—the one that he robustly presented between you two only to put you back in your place yet again, leaving you both to square one with things heavily unlabelled even after the night you spent together, making love.

And you realise that you were safe from everything but not his love.

[astracora]

Happy Newdawn Day!

Characters: Poly!LADs x gn!mc (featuring Nero, Tara, Simone, Greyson, Yvonne, Jeremiah, Thomas and Caleb (mention only))

Warnings: None

Word Count: 5797

Written: 1st January 2025

Notes: Established relationship with gn!MC (using Cat Curse MC) with all LADs, with my personal pov of the game and lil headcanons littered in. Unnamed MC, but using my personal MC's basic appearance and adjusted backstory. I take some liberties with what the game offers me. I'm so sorry this got away from me so much I feel baffled by it. I just had to get it down, it's so messy and not beta-read, but I love them all so much. (I'm also sorry for the ending, I got possessed by Caleb's not-ghost). So enjoy... the first actual fic I've written for the Poly!LADs and not just smaus... Now I need to eat.

Masterlist AO3

If someone asked you right now, “Hey, a year ago did you think you’d be stood here?”

Well, you’d have given some incredulous notion of being alive, let alone stood in one of Linkon’s Parks, taking in the sight of your loved ones.

Most of them, anyway.

If, upon meeting Xavier, Rafayel, Sylus and Zayne (again), someone had said, “Hey in a years time they will be the most important people to you.” You’d have laughed in their face. The idea as absurd as it is invigorating… because they are. The most important people in the world to you. The companions you trust to have your back in combat, the people you want to see most when you wake up, the lives you most want to share.

You think back to a hazy childhood, told your heart could give out any minute. A timeline unknown, the nature of your condition hard to track. The core in your chest, a question no one had the answer to. Giving up on a future, on meaning anything.

You think back to days spent in the hospital, for your heart, for injuries gained from fights that even Caleb couldn’t help piece back together, for the arm you lost. Wondering if you were going to hit the wall eventually.

When you lost Caleb, your partner in crime, and rock, you’d expected the tides to rise. Sinking you.

It was folly to misjudge those around you. Kindness, warmth and love, with some degree of greed. Of course they’d grabbed your hand, pulling you back to land. Wrapping you in a towel, bringing you to heat, keeping you shielded against the chill.

The wounds healed, though they left scars behind, but you could breathe again. 

That troublesome little heart beating harder, hope as a lifeblood. Bringing you forward, keeping you moving.

All the way to a new year.

Between the five of you, the gathering had bloomed out for Newdawn Day.

You’re not sure how Rafayel and Sylus had gotten permission to rent out an entire park. Money had to be involved, you also wouldn’t be surprised if threats came into play too. Though you hope not.

You’d been decorating all morning. Flowers, bunting, balloons. Tables set up with food, drinks and an entire section set up with photobooth equipment and props. After all, you’d spent far too much of this year taking photos, what better way to commemorate the end of it.

Xavie’s barbeque has reopened, with Sylus keeping a watchful eye… or being an interference. It was hard to tell.

Rafayel has taken to making drinks, you weren’t sure where he learned how to mix cocktails, but you’re happy to leave him to it. Watching as he makes non-alcoholic ones for Zayne as well.

You sit with Tara and Simone, watching the people around you.

“I can’t believe we’ve been hunters for a year now.” Tara nudges you, grin on her face. Her cheeks are slightly pink, eyes glittering as she leans her head on your shoulder. “I’m so glad we joined together.”

The fidgeting in your chest is ticklish, and you let out a soft laugh under breathe, “Yeah, me too Tay.”

Simone leans back in her chair, stretching her arms out behind her, as she balances on the back two legs, “We’ve been really busy, I bet it’ll get worse too.”

Tara groans, “Come on Omi…”

A bark of laughter is the response as she rights her chair, leaning forwards, “Hey, it’s fine, we’ll be working at it together.” Poking Tara in the forehead, she laughs again.

As she rubs the offending spot, Tara looks over at where Nero is chatting to Xavier, “Can’t believe Nero came, he doesn’t really enjoy these kind of things.”

“Yeah, no offence but I think he likes Wanderers more than us.”

You laugh, it’s not incorrect. You think about meeting Nero, about the shy man who is a living encyclopedia about wanderers, who could talk for hours about Lumiere. You also think about how isolating it is not to share things you enjoy with others, not knowing how to approach people because they think you’re weird.

Odd.

Not fitting in.

You think about how the first time you’d engaged with Nero’s conversation, his eyes had lit up and he’d leaned forwards so far in his chair he’d fallen out of it.

You think about how he attached himself to Xavier, just because the man listened, calm, even if he didn’t always have much to say in response.

Didn’t make him feel like an outsider.

Pride fills your chest even though Xavier’s personality has little to do with you. You still find yourself loving him more for his warmth. His acceptance.

The sleepy smile on his face when he assures someone he has no problems hearing them.

“There’s no Lumiere specials running today,” Simone is talking, looking at her phone, “maybe the size of the gathering and that mixed together to make a Nero appearance.”

“Plus, Xavier.”

“We should have invited Jenna!” Tara exclaimed, grabbing your arm, pulling it. You think that maybe Raffy put a little too much rum in her daiquiri.

“Do you think she would have even come?”

You think about Sylus over by the grill, arms folded and canines on show in his smirk, “I think maybe next time, I’m sure we can invite her next time.”

When the stress of having hunters in the same area as Sylus isn’t quite so high, when you’re not constantly worried about tripping up with his name. When you don’t have to sit and debate if inviting him is worth the risk, despite loving him and wanting him there. Wanting to see him outside of his world of violence and strain.

You’re not sure how much Jenna knows, but it’s not worth pushing a brick in an old wall.

“You should check on those kids though.” Simone reaches over to turn your head, to where to twins are milling around by the dessert table. You can see them fidgeting. Hand twisting in their hoodie pockets. “Either they really want some cake, or they’re uncomfortable.”

You are standing before she’s even finished talking, worry twisting at you like a snake around your chest.

Tara releases your arm and nudges you forwards, grin on her face, “It’s Simone’s turn to get drinks anyway.”

The woman laughs, twisting the end of her ponytail around her finger, “They’re free, this is the easiest set of rounds I’ve ever had to get.”

Your laugh is soft, and warm, and so heavy in your heart, but you lean down to kiss the top of Tara’s head as she smiles so happily up at you, “I’ll see you in a bit.”

“See ya bestie!”

Simone returns the salute you offer, and you let your feet carry you to the twins.

They’re wearing their crow hoodies again, but with party hats over the hoods. Kieran’s scars are visible, his hood pushed back so you can see his eyes. They’re wavering, unsure. Darting around the place. It’s less controlled, but he looks so much like Sylus does that you pause.

Worried. They’re worried.

Of course they are, there’s hunters here, people who pose some… degree of threat to the person they care most about, other than each other.

Luke is fidgeting, bouncing on the heels of his feet, like he doesn’t know where to put all the pent up energy. You can tell the two are in a feedback loop. Feeding off each others anxieties.

As you approach, they seem to halt, for a moment. Looking at each other, then at the cakes, then at you. Seconds, and then Luke forces a grin. “Hey Hunter!”

Your head tilts as you watch them, Luke pushing his hood back a little so he can look at you properly.

“You’re wearing them again?” It’s an easier question, than the one you want to ask.

“Of course! They’re comfy.”

“Boss keeps pulling them off us to wash them.” Kieran pouts at you, the expression pulling at the scar over his cheek, “Aren’t clothes meant to be worn?”

It’s hard not to laugh at them, they remind you of kids far younger than they are sometimes. Other times the darkness lingering in their gaze is reminiscent of one you’ve seen in your own. In Sylus’… In Rafayel’s.

There’s a sickening in your stomach, that you have to move on from quickly, lest it start to burn like acid.

“You have to take care of them, clean them, and they’ll last longer.”

Kieran rubs his chin, and the laugh comes out this time. They really have picked up so many traits from Sylus.

It gives you some courage, to focus on their expressions, and force through the feeling that always comes, “Are you two ok? You don’t have to stay if you don’t want to.”

Luke blinks, fidgeting stopping, and droops, “No.”

Kieran nudges him, “He means, no we’re fine.”

“You don’t have to lie.” You move to the table, and despite knowing they haven’t eaten a proper meal yet, you slice some sponge cake and shove it into their hands on little paper plates. “Eat.”

You feel like Zayne is in front of you for a moment.

Eat, then talk about how you’re feeling.

You’re not sure the cake fixes the feeling of struggling through your feelings, but you do know that the distraction of sugar, gives you a moment to ground on something real. Tangible.

The twins take the plates, looking down at them, and then back up at you.

“You don’t have to stay, anywhere you don’t want to be. You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do. You don’t have to pretend, or lie, or act a certain way.”

You’re relieved when they take the plates, even happier when Luke shoves some in his mouth. He doesn’t bother with the fork, just grabs it. Kieran pokes at it for a moment, before following in his brother’s footsteps.

“There’s a lot of people.” Kieran finally speaks, twisting his fork in the sponge.

“You can borrow my noise cancelling headphones if you like? I’m sure Zayne has his too.”

Luke shakes his head, “Not like that. Too many possible threats.” He winces, “Sorry, they’re your friends.”

You sit on the table, carefully avoiding cake as you look at the two, “They’re my friends, they’re strangers to you. It’s alright.”

“We just feel weird. On edge.”

“Do you want to go back to the base, somewhere safer? Or home?”

The two shake their heads in sync, frowning more, “No. We want to be here. With boss. To celebrate.”

“So how can I help?”

The expression they shoot back is another you’ve seen on Sylus’ face. But their eyes are wider as they blink at you, their faces younger. Their cheeks softer. You wonder, for a moment, if this is what having brothers would make you feel like.

“If you want to stay,” You clarify, “what can be done to make you feel better here?”

They look at each other, hesitating on the precipice. You wonder if they fear revealing too much, like you are. Showing too much of your heart is a risk. It comes with the very real fear of stumbling over the edge, with no net to catch you.

It comes with your chest flayed open, fragile organ revealed, ready for the risk of a knife… or a hand, no matter how gentle.

“We don’t know.”

“Can we think about it?”

You nod, hopping off the table, “You come find me the second you work it out, or go bother Sylus. I’m sure Xavier would appreciate the break from his probable torment.”

They laugh, and you watch for a moment as they resume eating their cake. Some level of buoyancy back in their stances. The relief settles… It’s something at least.

A door they can walk through at any moment.

The smell of grilling meat and vegetables has you drifting over to Xavie’s Barbecue. You’re relieved that Sylus has been keeping an eye over it, because there’s no smell of burning, and Xavier’s successfully making an array of food for everyone.

You didn’t want to think about how much food wastage there would be otherwise…

Nero is talking animatedly, gesturing as Xavier nods. Sylus is half paying attention, smirking at the prince every now and then. He notices you first though, hearing your footsteps even over the grass.

Sharp red eyes, turning molten and liquid as his gaze focuses on your approach. “Ah, there you are kitten.” Is said on an exhale. You’d think it was relief, with the way he breathes you in as you stand next to him and Xavi.

Xavier uses the hand not currently turning burgers, to hold onto yours, squeezing before releasing.

With his chin resting on your shoulder, Sylus indicates towards Nero with a half-hearted wave, “The Lumiere fan was just telling us some new stories.” You can hear his amusement. Clearly enjoying the situation.

The look on Nero’s face, however, is thrilled. You’re used to spending time talking to him, but the glee you see is always somewhere on the verge of scary, and sweet. “I heard that Lumiere took on an Arbiterwing. ALONE!”

You feel ice drip down your spine, and your eyes pin Xavier. Who jumps, almost dropping his tongs.

A chuckle sounds in your ear, as a hand grabs your waist, thumb soothing under your shirt to help ease down your hackles.

“Oh you did, huh? All on his own?”

“Yeah, how cool right? Lumiere’s EVOL is so powerful.”

If you had your fangs still, you think they’d be showing, as your try not to outwardly glare at the hero in question, “So cool. I bet he’s a really impressive person. Lumiere, that is.”

This time Xavier pouts, and you see the light blush moving over his cheeks. He looks over at you, brows furrowing.

“I wonder how his loved ones must feel though, finding out he fought such a terrifying beast on his own.”

Now he has the decency to look guilty, like a sad bunny, ears drooping. You almost feel bad, almost. Wanting to soothe skin in your hands, before you remember he’s the one out there fighting wanderers you’d had to fight with a team, on his own. “I’m sure he was careful.” Xavier grumbles, pleading beautiful starry eyes focused on you.

“Foods burning, prince.” Sylus purrs from his place leaning against your shoulder.

The man in question jumps, and resumes his work.

Nero still has starry admirable eyes, not paying attention to your and Xavier’s starring, “It’s a shame he’s not a hunter, imagine how much more he could do in a team of us!”

You look away from Xavier, whose shoulders relax a bit when you stop spearing him with your eyes, and laugh, “Would be helpful having him around, right?”

Tara and Simone call over Nero, yelling for him to join them. You almost expect him to turn them down, but he seems buoyed by his conversations with Xavier, and trots over to join them.

One you’re alone, you turn around to look at Xavier properly, “Really? An Arbiterwing?”

Sylus growls a little, “Damn things.” You’ve never asked Sylus why he finds Arbiters so difficult, you remember fighting one with him in the N109 Zone, and you certainly didn’t want to fight one again if you could ever help it. Still he seems particularly irritable about them.

“I promise I was careful. I didn’t have time to call for anyone else.” He places a hand on the your cheek and presses a kid to your forehead, pleading eyes bright and beautiful. You sigh, tugging him down a little, planting a kiss on his cheek. His cheeks flare bright, and his fingers twitch against your cheek. “I’m not going anywhere.”

You poke him in the chest now, “I’ll hold you to that, oh great hero.”

His groan is accompanied by yours and Sylus’ laugh. Who nuzzles against your shoulder, as he watches Xavier plating food.

“My job is done, nothing’s burned down.” He nips at your neck, “I think your favourite crow deserves praise.”

You mimic him, rubbing your chin with one hand, and titling your head, “Is Mephie around? I thought he had the day off.”

Another nip, this one a little harder, but not painful, “You’re cruel, kitten.” His hands are now both under your shirt, kneading your skin, warm palms sending small skitters of heat up and down your spine, “I worked hard, keeping the prince from destroying everything with his curse.”

“I’m not cursed.” Xavier spits back, “Some things just… don’t like working for me.”

“The burned down kitchen back at the base, certainly felt cursed.”

“It was your ovens fault.”

“Whatever you say, bunny.”

Your hand reaches up to tangle in Sylus’ soft hair as the two snipe at each other, easing through the strands and pulling his head in a way you can kiss him. He bites your bottom lip, and as you pull away, drowsily tries to chase your lips with his. Purring at the scratching at the back of his head. “You did good, both of you. Thank you.”

He doesn’t answer, just purrs and growls as he nuzzles, and inhales.

Xavier’s smile brightens, pride in his countenance as he nods, “Of course Starlight, whatever you need.”

“Take some grilled fish over to the fish, kitten.” Sylus finally breaks out of his daze, lifting himself up to grab a plate for Rafayel, that is being pilled with his favourites. “He’s been making drinks all day, I worry he’ll fall over soon.”

There’s something funny about the leader of Onychinus making sure Raffy is well fed, because he’d deny he was doing it. Pretend it was just to keep things moving smoothly, a measure to make the day easier to deal with.

Rather than what it actually is, concern for someone he cares about.

For a man so honest with his feelings, he prefers to hide them in smokescreens.

With a final kiss, one pressed to Xavier’s hand, and one to Sylus’ forehead, you leave with the plate.

When you approach Rafayel, he’s making a new drink for Yvonne and Greyson. It has gummy bears sprinkled on top, and a tiny little umbrella stuck in some pineapple. Greyson’s cheeks are very bright red, and you’re not surprised that he’s leaning heavily on Yvonne’s shoulder for balance.

“For you.” You offer the plate to Raffy, who sniffs at it happily, before stuffing a piece of salmon in his mouth.

“Cutie!” He speaks through chewing, pulling you down to join him at his makeshift bar. You grimace, staring at the sticky surface, and the mess he’s made.

Raffy is many things, a clean worker is not at all one of them.

You pull your arms back quickly to not get a horrifying sensory issue.

Your fish doesn’t notice, instead shaking a mixer in one hand, as he eats with the other. Even just looking at him, you can see the blush on his ears, and the slight unsteadiness to his hands. “Let me do that.” You take the mixer, “Eat.” He obliges, frowning only a little bit before he happily begins to clear his plate. Humming in satisfaction.

Xavier is a capable cook, when there’s no active flames or risk of explosion.

“Hey hunter!” Greyson exclaims, leaning forwards, his drink spilling a little over the side. “Thanks for inviting us.”

Yvonne smiles, offering you a glass of… what you assume is a Piña colada based by the pineapple slice. You take it, placing it down in front of you as you shake the mixer. Handing it back to Raffy, as he finishes his food. “I’m shocked seeing Dr Li trying to set up fireworks.”

Your laugh is warm, and fond. Zayne builds such an image of himself around others, “He’s secretly a big child, under the snowy layers.”

“Dr Li checked his watch so many times today, we were all worried we might get an emergency come in.”

“I wasn’t looking to seeing him frown, if that would have happened.”

“He shows his feelings so easily now, when it comes to you all.”

It’s hard to fight the heat in your cheeks, but its true. He has softened so much, especially recently.

Another drink is put down, “For Tara.” Raffy says, “This one for Simone.”

You watch as Yvonne nods, picking them up and wandering off.

“You’ve gained bar staff.” You speak, watching as Raffy puts his mixers down, finished with his orders for now, you assume. “What a successful little bar, our fishie is running.”

He preens, fangs peeking out with his smile, “I’m good at everything I do cutie.”

“Where did you even learn?” Greyson asks, chewing one of the gummy bears.

Rafayel shrugs, “Just one of those things you pick up when you travel.”

Looking at him, you want to ask follow up questions… but Raffy won’t share if he doesn’t want to, there’s always a feeling like looking through murky water with him. There’s always something there, lurking under the surface, but so hard to make out. You have to wait for it to surface, wait for it to come to you.

Better than trying to fish it out, and hurting it.

“I’ll take some water bottles around to everyone in a little while.” You look over at where Tara, Simone, and now Yvonne, are singing to a song playing throughout the park. As Nero nods his head absently, sipping some water. “Though your drinks are certainly popular.”

“Gotta greet the new day in style, cutie.” His head plops down into his hand, elbow on the bar, as he watches you. Beautiful eyes narrowing. Reading every little detail, every change.

Being stared at by Rafayel is a sensation that makes your back straighten.

When he puts his focus on something, he’s picking it apart, seeing every part of it, so he can paint it. In the way his eyes see the world. As art, as a wonder, as something worth protecting.

Your fingers reach out, shaking slightly, without even being aware of it, and brush the hair, that’s fallen right in front of his eyes, back. His skin paints red further, spreading down his neck, and his eyes sparkle. You wish you could paint, you wish more than anything that this beautiful man was kept in a portrait to stare at every moment of the day.

It’s hard to not believe in gods, when someone as beautiful as him sits there, staring at you. Like you make the waves crash against the shores.

He turns his head to kiss the tips of your fingers, before placing the pulse point of your wrist against his cheek again. “It’s a good day to celebrate.” He breathes out.

The laugh to your side pulls you out of your stupor, as Greyson nods in agreement. You pull back a little, though Rafayel doesn’t release your hand, keeping it in his lap as the two of you turn to your companion.

“Is Zayne doing ok?” You ask Rafayel.

“He debated drinking, then remembered how many people would be here, and changed his mind.”

“He’s a stickler for being a good example.” Greyson adds, stirring his drink.

You wonder if it’s really that, and the big snowman is not just stewing and fearing his control. Tightly wound and kept under lock and key, just in case. Always watchful.

At the very least, as you look over at him reading instructions on a firework box, you think he is having fun at least. You can’t say the same for Jeremiah, who is hovering by the photobooth, looking through the album next to it.

Raffy kisses your hand again, smiling at you, “Go be your nosy self, cutie. We’ll be here when you get back.”

“Or we’ll be playing spin the bottle much to Dr Li’s disappointment.”

You almost bark a laugh at Greyson, the mental image of Zayne playing spin the bottle or truth or dare, is such an image, you want to see it. Desperately. Pressing a kiss to the top of Raffy’s head as you stand, you wave at them both and head off.

“Sooo.” You poke your head over Jeremiah’s shoulder, who jumps. Looking at you like you’re a ghost. “Are you alright? Looking for any particular prop?”

It takes a moment before you think his brain starts working again, and he smiles… but its not a smile you’re used to seeing on Jeremiah’s face. You’ve seen it on Xavier’s face though. Sorrow lurking at the edges. Tired.

Maybe the passing of years for them both has a weight you’ll never understand.

“I’m alright, just… a lot of people. I haven’t been around this many in a long time.” He forces a laugh, “Silly right?”

You shake your head. You might have different reasons for struggling with crowds, but you refuse to let any of the people you’ve brought into your heart, think you are not a safe space for their concerns. “Not the first time I’ve heard that today. You’re fine.”

He’s got the album open on a photo of you, him and Xavier outside of Philos. Holding flowers in your arms.

It’s… a realisation that you’ve never seen Jeremiah with another person than Xavier. Like he’s become an island, with only Philos as his port.

So you change the page on the album, to some of Yvonne and Greyson. During the preparation for Zayne’s birthday. “We’ve taken so many photos this year.” It settles in your chest again, that thanks to your loved ones… you now have full albums, and many more to fill. “You should talk to Greyson, he likes sunflowers a lot.”

Jeremiah laughs, looking at you like you’re too obvious, “He’s a little drunk for that now.”

“When he sobers up then.” You huff, pushing the album into his arms, straightening the page out.

“I… I’ll try. It’s odd, seeing Xavier like this.”

“You can do it too, you know?”

There’s doubt in the mans eyes, you don’t want to look too close. It gives you a feeling like a fire that’s burned too long.

“Or you can just take some really stupid photos with me, wearing the worst hats we can find, and see how many we can take in under a minute.” It’s hard to look too close at someone’s emotions, you feel. Looking into someones eyes is painful, there are times you can manage it, and times you can’t.

You find some people’s gaze holds yours against your will, not violently, but powerfully. Rafayel and Sylus have eyes that pulling away from feels like tearing part of yourself out. Xavier and Zayne feel like staring into a tranquil pond, losing yourself.

Jeremiah’s right now are wavering on the edge of something, and you can’t keep looking at them, turning your head a little to look at the props on the table. You reach out, carefully picking up a pair of bunny ears, and place them carefully on his head.

“If you don’t want to stay, you don’t have to… but if you’re scared and still want to try, then stay, and build bridges.”

You think about the men you’ve made your home, and the fear of overcoming the need to flee from them.

The house in ashes and cinders. The number that never texts you back anymore.

“As grumpy as Xavier asks, he’s there if you need him. Me too.”

Jeremiah reaches up to touch the bunny ears on his head, and smiles weakly, “I do need to get a drink.”

You nudge him, hand gently pushing the man forwards towards where Raffy is now spinning a mixer around his finger, to the thrilled cheers of Greyson and Tara, “Go on then, make it a good one.”

As he walks away, he waves at you a little, but is soon pulled to sitting down by a drunk doctor, and a happy hunter.

Your final stop is the fireworks, as Thomas and Zayne set them up somewhere safe. You’re glad its Zayne setting them up, as you worry Raffy would get excited and set them off too early.

If there’s a flame to put out, better the snowman, than the fish.

As you approach, Zayne looks up, and his forest eyes soften at the vision of you. Smile quirking cool lips. “Darling, have you enjoyed yourself?”

He’s warm, and familiar, and safe. Like a hearth. The irony of the cold skin, versus how heated he makes you feel, is something. As you take his extended hand, thumb brushing over your skin, you settle against his side while Thomas finishes up.

“It’s nice, seeing everyone.” You offer, “Seeing everyone moving forwards for the new year.” You trace the skin under his eyes with your fingertip, down to his mouth. He gasps a little, a puff of breath against the cool metal, before taking your wandering fingers in his own.

“Seeing some of you relaxed, is also quite pleasant.” You tease, bumping him with your hip. His laugh is a soft noise, that settles in your chest. Cool around your frantic heart.

“Our little family has behaved themselves, I haven’t had to put out any fires. It’s allowed for the relaxation.”

“You mother hen.”

Thomas stands up, brushing his hands on his trousers and grinning over at you, “Hey Mx Bodyguard. We’re all done here finally. Has Rafayel gotten everyone drunk yet?”

“He’s trying, I think his plan is going well, while we’re all unconscious he’ll achieve world domination.”

Zayne tenses, releasing your metal hand to rub at the space between his eyes, “The feeling of dread has returned.”

“I’m sure he’ll find some place for us in his new kingdom.”

“You’d make a good jester, Zayne.”

“It’s getting worse.” Your doctor frowns, tugging at your hand to glare unserious eyes at you as you fight the urge to laugh, the quirk to your lips too obvious to him.

Thomas extends the box of sparklers to you, “We can use these later, after watching the show.”

Zayne looks down at what they’ve worked on as the three of you move away, back to the party. He’s often hard to read, but you can see the nerves in him, the worry he hasn’t done it right. So you squeeze his cold hand in your warmer one, and lean against his shoulder, “It’ll be great. Even if the fireworks sputter, we’ll have memories.”

His worries soothe, and he smiles, “Have to take some photos for that album of yours.”

“‘Newdawn Day, we watched some very sad fireworks, then played games for hours’.” You poke him in the side using your joined hands.

“You’ll have to sleep at some point.”

Thomas laughs, “You’re just as bad as Rafayel then?”

“I am not.”

“When did you last get a full 7 hours, darling?” Zayne raises his brow, you want to grumble and argue, but he knows you too well. You rarely sleep well. You rarely get a good amount of sleep.

The nightmares are getting a little better, a little, but there’s never enough time to get rest in-between all the other things you need to do.

“No wonder whenever I check on you two in the studio, you look like two feral cats.”

“Hey, don’t let Raffy hear you call him a cat, he’ll sulk again.”

Zayne’s hand in yours, entwines your fingers, squeezing, loosening, squeezing again. Over and over again. Like he’s using your hand as a stim toy. Or perhaps he’s offering you a grounding physical sensation.

Either way, you squeeze back.

It’s dark now, and there are lanterns set around the area. It’s a vision. Everyone has gathered back in the centre, drinks in hands, sitting in the grass, staring up at the sky.

You can hear laughter, chatter and the occasional too loud voice calling out excitedly.

Jeremiah sits with Greyson, drinking, and chatting, while Yvonne, Tara and Simone have begun clinking glasses together before each sip. Nero is lay down next to the three pointing out stars to them, while Xavier adds additional trivia about the constellations. Thomas walks ahead to sit near where the twins are throwing food into each others mouths, and occasionally at the back of Sylus’ head. Who is holding back the urge to pick them up with his EVOL.

Raffy’s cheeks are bright red, but resting his head in Sylus’ lap, trying not to spill his drink down himself. Xavier is lay next to him, an eye-mask pushed to the top of his head, but now that his work is done, he looks close to drifting off.

Zayne hands you the little remote, that controls the final event of the evening, “When you’re ready.”

You tug his hand, pulling him with you into the little gathering of your partners and friends. Shoving yourself against the heat of Sylus’ side, who chuckles and wraps an arm around your shoulder, to flick a bit of Zayne’s hair out of his eyes. Before pulling you closer.

Then tug the doctor down next to you. You think you’re smiling. You’re pretty sure you are.

It’s more familiar on your face than it ever used to be, and it’s something you hope becomes as familiar as the heart stuttering in your chest.

“Ready?” You call out, to a cheer of assent, and with a single press of the button, and love surrounding you. The sky is lit up with blossoming flowers.

“Happy Newdawn day!”

There’s a moment of quiet, when you step away from the party, a sparkler in your hand. You spell out names as you walk further out, not too far that you can’t hear everyone, but far enough that no one needs to see the tears lurking in your eyes.

Newdawn reminds you of everything you’ve gained, and everything you’ve lost…

Pulling your phone out, you open his messages. Unread messages fill the screen. Reminding you he’s not there…

Still, you can’t help but send him another one. Maybe, somewhere he’ll hear you.

Maybe wherever he is, he’s happy.

When your sparkler is dead, and your messages sent, you take in a deep inhale. Clearing the shadows from your heart, and turn back to where twinkling lights summon you home. Eyes are turned to you, green, red, blue and pink, and you feel their gazes pulling you back. Where you belong, where you’re safe, no matter what else comes after you.

So you follow their call, like they’re a siren song, willingly and joyfully. Ready to follow them to the depths of the ocean if you have to.

And as you do, for a small moment, you feel the phone in your pocket vibrate.

🍎 partner in crime 🍎: Hey Pipsqueak. Happy Newdawn day.

[moody-alcoholic]

Chapter 4 - The Stalker

Summary: 5.2k words. 141 learn about your stalker situation and Simon makes a plan to help, but things escalate faster then expected and you end up having to come to terms with things a lot quicker then you expect.

CW: mentions of trauma, mental health, abusive ex, stalking, talking about physical abuse, alcohol, angst, hurt/comfort (kinda).

Previous - masterlist - Next

AO3

Enjoy <3

“Let’s debrief, then maybe you will get some answers.” John says standing up straight. 

“How did the Renfolds job go?” He asks looking over at Simon. 

“Easy, needed his weapon cleaning. Built a shooting range in his basement.” Simon explains. 

“Anything we should be concerned about?” John asks. 

“Don’t think so, seems like it’s just for personal use.” Simon says. John looks down at you. 

“What do you think?” You look up at John confused. He want’s your opinion? 

“I-I don’t know, I was a bit distracted by the guns, and the shooting range.” And how good Simon looked. John nods looking over at Johnny. 

“What happened with you?” He asks. 

“Well it was all going according to plan until the supposedly empty building was no longer empty.” Johnny explained smiling.

“You were only supposed to be gathering intel how did it end in a gunfight?” John asked. 

“They didn’t take kindly to me snooping around their stuff.” Johnny says shrugging. “You should have sent Ghost in.” 

“I needed you to confirm the cargo. I gave Ghost the Renfolds job so he’d be near by.” John explained. Johnny nodded. 

“Well they’ve got enough explosives in that place to blow London to pieces.” 

“Is it secure?” John asks.

“About as secure as it can be, I found shipping manifests, I assume they’re planning on moving it when they get the chance.” Johnny explains.

“Hang on a second.” You interrupt. “You had a gunfight in a building with enough explosives to blow up London?” Simon chuckles behind you. 

“Johnny’s being dramatic. But yes unfortunately we weren’t left with much of a choice.” John says. He looks over at Johnny and Gaz for a second. 

“Johnny, and Gaz go back tomorrow secure the place then hand it over to the Met. The quicker we can get everything destroyed the better.” John says as you watch Johnny and Kyle nod. 

“The Met? As in New Scotland Yard as in the metropolitan police?” You ask. John nods. 

“It’s expensive for the Met to plan a sting, collect the legal evidence, wait for warrants. When we can just sneak in and get all the evidence they need and maybe even shut it down for them. We’re cheaper too.” John explains.

“So you work for the Met?” You ask. You hear Simon laugh again. 

“No, we don’t work for anyone, but sometimes they ask for our help and we’re usually more then happy to oblige.” 

“Besides means they turn a blind eye when we make people disappear.” Johnny laughs winking at you. You can’t tell if he’s being serious or not. There’s a few seconds of silence before everyone turns to you. 

“You said you were recommended us, why?” John asks. You suddenly feel nervous, you start rubbing your hands together. They’ve cleared up somethings now it’s your turn. 

“I have an ex.” You say looking down at the floor. Great start. 

“We broke up about a month ago, it was messy. I don’t think he’s quite over it yet.” You remember the break up. It was messy, in multiple ways. Lot’s of shouting, screaming, the police being called. You hoped it would be the last time you’d ever have to explain away bruises. You locked him out your flat and he sat outside the door begging to be let back in. How sorry he was, eventually you caved letting him fearing your neighbours would report you to the police for noise disturbance. It was the worst decision you made.

You feel a hand on your shoulder pulling you out of you head. You look up Johnny has moved closer to you. It’s Simon’s hand on your shoulder, you almost can’t believe it, he gives you a gentle squeeze. You thought he hated you. Or at the very least was annoyed by your presence. Maybe you misjudged him. 

“Is he stalking you lass?” Johnny asks. You don’t know what to say, you don’t exactly have proof just a feeling. You can’t get all worked up over a feeling. You know he’s been trying to contact you, creating accounts on social media to message you to the point where you needed to deactivate all your accounts. You know he’s been finding your number every time you change it, and you know he’s in contact with your family.

“He just won’t leave me alone. I think it’s making me paranoid. He keeps getting my number every time I change it. He managed to get a key to my flat after I kicked him out. I came home one day to find him moved back in. He..” You stop yourself. They didn’t need to know how that story ends. Simon's hand is warm on your shoulder, you don’t want it to leave. You sigh looking up. 

“I don’t have proof, if that’s you want it’s just a stupid feeling.” You say looking at John. 

“When was the last time he contacted you?” John asks.

“Saturday.” You say, John hums his eyes flick up to Simon. You look over at Johnny and Kyle, they’re leaned forward in the sofa looking at you. 

“I’m assuming this relationship was not the best?” Simon asks. You shake your head. He squeezes your shoulder again then his hand leaves. 

“C’mon, lets have a chat.” He says. You get up confused. All of a sudden he wants to talk? You follow him and he takes you into John’s office, closing the door behind you. 

“Sit,” he says pointing at the sofa in the corner of the room. He drags over one of the chairs and sits in front of you. There is a coffee table between you both, you look at him as he leans forward in the chair. 

“I thought maybe you would like some privacy.” He says. You sigh and go back to rubbing your hands. 

“Let’s start easy. What’s his name?” Simon asks. 

“Joe, Joe Sharp.” You say. 

“How long were you together?” 

“3 years, we lived together for 2, that’s when things changed when he moved in.” You say, hanging your head again. 

“Abusive?” He asks. You nod.

“Physical, verbal?” You nod again. You hear him sigh. 

“Why do you think he’s stalking you?” He asks you look up at him. His eyes are soft, kind. Even the way he’s holding his body, he’s like a different person. 

“I don’t know I think I’m just paranoid, he’s been so desperate to keep in contact with me that I think I just over think everything. I feel like I see him when I’m sure he’s not there. I feel like I’m being followed whenever I’m alone. The nightmares about him breaking into my flat don’t help.” You stop yourself. 

“It sounds stupid when I say it out loud.” 

“It’s not stupid.” Simon says. “Hey look at me.” You look up at him. 

“It’s not stupid. You would be surprised how many times people think they’re being stalked only to find out their intuition was correct.” He says. You nod. 

“First things first though we need proof.”

“I don’t have any.” You admit. He nods. 

“That’s okay, the best way to get a stalker out is to make them jealous. Do you have social media, Facebook, Instagram? Whatever one people use now-a-days.” 

“I’ve deactivated them but I can get them back.” You say reaching for your phone. He nods.

“Make a post, something along the lines of ‘I’m so happy in my new relationship.’ If you want to make it extra believable I can hold your hand you can take a picture?” He says, raising an eyebrow. You nod and he gets up moving next to you on the sofa. He lays his hand out palm up and you slip your fingers between his. His hands are big, and soft. Not what you were expecting. It sends shivers down your spine. It’s the first time you’ve held anyone's hand since your ex.

This is not the same though, this is not romantic. Why does it feel so nice though. You bring your phone up and snap the picture. Looking up at him, his eyes look deep into yours, he has such beautiful eyes. You look away taking your hand out his so you can get back to typing. You pick Instagram, it’s most likely the one he would check the most. You type it out and attach the photo. 

“Should I unblock his accounts?” You ask nervously. 

“It would be helpful, you can always block him again after.” He says. You hover over the post button. You turn to look at Simon. 

“You don’t have to do this but trust me it’s the easiest and quickest way to bait him out.” Simon says. You take a deep breath in and post it. 

“Good now we wait.” Simon says getting up. You follow putting your phone back in your pocket. 

“What do I do?” You ask. 

“Get on with your day act like everything is normal. I’ll give you my number. He tries to contact you, you think you see him, you get a feeling that he’s following you, anything. You call me immediately.” His voice is commanding, he’s looking you in the eyes. It’s not hairs standing up on the back of your neck anymore it’s a new feeling, like a warmth deep within you. You swallow hard handing him your phone so he can put his number in. You take it back putting it back in your pocket. 

“Simon, I can’t afford to hire you guys, I heard you’re pretty pricey.” You say as he turns to leave the room. 

“Don’t worry about that.” He says. That doesn't exactly put you at ease but it’s better then them demanding payment. They’re helping you, they don’t need to. Besides what if you’re wrong and it is all just your paranoid mind playing tricks on you. Then you’ve just wasted their time. You try to push the thoughts away, especially now you’ve basically just kicked the hornets nest. 

When you get back out Simon explains the situation without going into too much detail. He tells Johnny to walk you home. This time when you go to protest you’re shut down by John who insists it’s necessary. You don’t argue it’s been a long day. You let Johnny take you home, he keeps you at ease, back to his bubbly self as he spouts off more stories from his army days. He keeps your mind occupied, you’re not constantly looking over your shoulder. 

“You know you did good today. Most people would have freaked out.” Johnny says once you reach the building. 

“I don’t know if I’ve processed it really yet.” You say chuckling. He nods.

“Well you have my number if you need anything.” He says. 

“Thanks, you take care of that arm.” You say. 

“‘Cause lass it’ll be good as new by tomorrow.” He says patting you on the shoulder then turns to leave. 

—————————— 

By the evening you had calmed down and you were sat watching TV. You couldn’t help but think back to holding Simon’s hand. You find yourself opening your phone and checking the picture. It was a nice picture even though you only snapped it quickly. God were you really that lonely that holding someones hand is enough to have you craving touch. You smile anyway letting yourself enjoy the feeling. It had been a while since you could imagine yourself being touched, or held like that again, let alone falling in love. Maybe this was healing, maybe the dark thoughts bought on with receiving any amount off affection were gone. It’s not long before the peacefulness of the moment is shattered by a sharp knock at the door. You panic almost instantly, holding your breath. 

“Babe it’s me.” You freeze as he knocks again. You look down at your phone, your fingers working their way to your contact list. You can’t think. Maybe he’ll think you’re out. You crawl off the sofa to the TV and the light to turn them off as the phone rings. 

“Hello.” It’s Simon’s voice, it snaps you back into reality. You can still hear him calling at the door. You crawl into the bedroom leaning up against the bed.  

“H-He’s at my door Simon.” You say hearing your voice break. 

“Okay where are you in the living room?” He asks, you can hear keys jingling down the phone. 

“Bedroom.” You say as quiet as you can so you’re sure he won’t be able to hear you. 

“Okay, I’m on my way can you stay were you are?” He says as you hear a car door close. You’re too scared to move, even if you wanted too. 

“Yeah, I-I’m staying here.” You say. The knocking has stopped but you’re sure you can still hear his feet shuffling outside. 

“I’m going to hang up now but I’ll be there soon okay.” 

“Okay.” You reply back tears are streaming down your cheeks now. You hear the call end and you clutch the phone. 

“Baby, we need to talk. Are you seeing someone else? Is he here now?” You hear him say, there’s an edge to his voice, something you haven’t herd in ages, it’s anger. You want to scream, yell at him to go away but you’re still trying to cling on to the fact he might not know you’re in. You sit there for what feels like hours hugging your legs. Eventually after a few more pleas and knocks it goes silent and stays silent.

Your heart is pounding in your chest and you feel sick. Where is Simon? It’s hard to keep track of time. You start spiralling, thinking of the worst possible things. This was the first time he has been back to the flat since you had the locks changed. That was almost 4 weeks ago. This is the closest he has been to you since you broke up with him. It felt too close. Like not even a deadbolt on the door or changing the locks could stop him. There is another knock at the door. You freeze again almost want to scream at him to leave. Why is he here why is he back? 

“It’s me, it’s Simon.” For a second you don’t believe it what if it’s a trick? No you called him and now he’s here. You force yourself to stand up walking over to the front door still clutching your phone in your hand. You unlock the dead bolt, then the lock, then open the handle. You see him standing there, you look round there is definitely no one else around now. He steps inside and you go through your routine of closing all the locks and covering the peephole. He looks around your tiny flat then turns to you.

“You okay?” he asks. You nod, it’s a lie but you don’t care he’s here now and that makes you feel safe. 

“Did you see him?” You ask, he shakes his head. He walks around your flat quickly, looking into the bedroom then walks back over to you. 

“I’ll stay the night, if that’s alright with you?” He asks. You don’t really know how to respond to that. This is the first time you have had a man in your flat since the break up. He dropped everything to come when you needed him. You feel safe around him but you don’t know him. You want to get to know him though. And you definitely don't want to be alone. 

“You can stay.” You say, swallowing the lump in your throat. He nods. 

“You sure you’re okay?” He asks frowning. You don’t want to lie again but you weren't expecting him to ask again. Tears threaten to spill down your cheeks and you force yourself to choke them away. 

“Sit down, I’ll get you a drink.” He says, turning into your kitchen. You walk over to the couch and sit down. 

“There’s wine in the fridge.” You say. 

“Lets start with water.” He replies as you hear the tap run. You pull your legs up to your chest. Simon comes over and hands you the glass then sits on the far end of the sofa. You sip the water as you both sit in silence. 

“Did he say anything?” Simon asks. 

“Just the usual, he misses me, he’s sorry, asked if it was true that I was seeing someone.” You say taking another sip of water. You look over at Simon his eyes scanning over you. It’s starting to get dark out but you don’t want to put the lights on worried he’ll see them and come back. 

“Are you hungry?” You ask Simon. 

“I ate at home.” He says. You nod looking at yourself in the black of the TV. You reach over and turn it on to whatever mindless show you were watching before. Simon doesn't say anything sometimes you catch him looking over at you out the corner of your eye. You order some food and something for Simon too, if he wants it. Even though you’re expecting it the doorbell ringing still makes you jump.

“I got it.” Simon says and before you can protest he’s on his feet. 

“One of them is for you.” You say as he passes you the pizza boxes. 

“Thank you,” he says taking one of the boxes and going back to his spot on the sofa. You get up to the kitchen.

“Want a drink?” You ask. 

“Waters fine.” You nod even though he can’t see you. You head back to the couch with the drinks. He smiles at you when you place his drink down on the coffee table. You sit there in silence demolishing your pizza then sipping on your wine till your head starts to clear. You’re not really paying attention to what’s playing on the TV, your mind is preoccupied with the fact Simon is sat in your flat with you eating pizza. Any other situation and this could be classed as a date. The only thing missing is the cuddling and the cheesy chick-flick.

“What made you want to do this? Help me out?” You ask looking over at him. He pauses for a second like he’s thinking of what to say. 

“I don’t like abusers, especially those who don’t know when to stop.” He says turning back to the TV. Okay that’s something you have to be careful about your next questions. 

“What made you want to join the military?” You ask, that seems like a pretty easy question. 

“To do some good.” He says, you’re not sure if that’s the whole reason but hey you’re talking, he’s not shutting you down. 

“Where are you from? You’re not from London.” You say sipping your wine. 

“Manchester. Ever been?” He asks looking at you. 

“No, the furthest north I’ve been is Birmingham.” 

“That’s unfortunate.” He says, you see a little smile on his lips. 

“What about you? You lived in London all your life?” He asks. 

“Yeah, Sutton, till I moved here.” You say.

“It’s a nice place.” He says looking round the flat, it’s dark now only the TV to light up the place.

“I’m thinking of moving, when I can afford another deposit.” You say looking down at your glass of wine. 

“Why?” he asks. 

“You know, fresh start, away from-” You stop yourself drinking the last of your wine and getting up. You pick up the empty pizza boxes. Taking them into the kitchen. You don’t even hear Simon getting up off the sofa you just accidentally back into him. You can feel his chest up against your back, it’s warm, strong, you almost want him to wrap his arms around you. His hands end up on your shoulders and your breath catches in your throat.

“I’ll make sure you’re not afraid to live in your own flat. I promise.” He says, his voice low, his grip on your shoulders soft, but firm. You feel heat rushing to your cheeks, you don’t want to move there’s that feeling again the craving of physical contact. You feel safe when he’s around like you’d trust him with your life. You let out a breath as he moves his hands from your shoulders and steps back. You feel cold suddenly, a shiver runs down your spine. You turn to look at him, you meet his eye line, his eyes are soft almost glazed over as he looks at you.

“Simon, why are you helping me?” You ask again, maybe he’ll give you a different answer. His hand reaches up slowly and you almost flinch, holding your breath as he tucks a strand of hair behind your ear. His eyes scan your face. 

“Did he ever, hit you?” He asks quietly. You nod, not being able to bring yourself to speak. His thumb brushes your cheek. 

“Choke you?” He asks, his hand resting on your chin. You swallow hard your throat feeling suddenly constricted. 

“You don’t have to answer.” He says. You force yourself to nod. 

“You said he came back after you kicked him out. He got a key and let himself in.” He says. You nod. 

“What happened?” He says gently holding your chin so you can’t look down. You open your mouth but words don’t come out. He lets go of your chin taking a step away to give you some space. Maybe this is what you need to do, to get this off your chest. Will it make you feel better? Maybe? But Simon’s giving you the opportunity to talk. You look down at your hands, forcing yourself to hold back the tears swallowing the lump in your throat. 

“He tried to kill me.” You say finally. It doesn’t feel like a weight off your shoulders, it feels like a punch to the gut. The guilt comes next. Why didn’t you report him? Why didn’t you get a restraining order? Why did you let it happen? You feel sick, your head spinning. You look back up at Simon, there is something different in his expression now. Does he understand? Does he even care? This morning you thought he hated you, now he’s in your flat, he’s not the same Simon you met a few days ago who would barely give you the time of day.

He’s here because you called him for help. He put’s a foot forward almost like he’s trying to test if he can step closer to you. You keep still and he takes that as permission to step to you. His hand cups your face in his warm hands and you look up at him. 

“I'm doing this because you don’t deserve it, that’s why I’m helping you. The torment, the guilt, the sleepless nights. I can’t make it go away but I can try and help.” He says. A tear rolls down your cheek, he brushes it away with his thumb. 

“You sound like you know what it’s like.” You say, trying not to let your voice break. 

“I do,” He sighs, his hands dropping from your face. He turns walking back to the sofa. 

“You should take the bed, you’re bigger it’ll be more comfortable.” You say, you don’t mind sleeping on the sofa at least you’ll fit. 

“Don’t be silly this is your place, your bed.” He says sitting back down on the sofa. You walk into the bedroom brushing away the rest of the tears that managed to escape as you dig through the wardrobe for blankets and pillows. You take them back out to him and place them on the sofa. You don’t know what to say, he’s sat watching the TV, you feel tired, drained. 

“You should get some rest.” He says without looking at you. You nod, turning to head back into the bedroom. 

“If you need anything, just let me know.” You say before you go through the door closing it behind you. You let out a breath, maybe this was healing? You just don’t know it yet. You change into your PJ’s and climb into bed. You can see the moonlight peaking through the blinds lighting up the room. Simon knows what it’s like. Maybe you should have asked him about ex’s. Or maybe it wasn’t his ex. You remember the way he reacted when you asked about his family. You wonder if he still talks to them.

You turn over in the bed looking at the door. It feels weird knowing he’s on the other side. Maybe you should crack the door open, it might make you feel better. You want to feel his hands on you again, squeezing your shoulder or touching your face. He’s gentle, not want you were expecting. You let out a breath and swing your feet out the bed before your brain has really even comprehended what you’re doing. This is a bad idea. He’s a work colleague, this could ruin everything. 

“Simon.” You say as soon as you open the door. He turns to look at you. 

“Will you come lay with me?” You’ve done it now, your cheeks flood with heat as you wait for a laugh, a scoff, him to straight up tell you no.

“You want me to lay with you, in your bed?” He asks sitting forward. You nod, then immediately start regretting it.

“Forget it, it doesn’t matter I’m sorry-”

“It’s okay, I will.” He says stopping you in your tracks and standing up. You stare at him as he turns the TV off walking over to you. You watch as he pulls his boots off leaving them by the front door. 

“If it’s what you want.” He says meeting your eye line. You nod, your heart thumping in your chest. You walk back into the bedroom, and he follows.

“You want me under or on top of the covers?” He asks. You hadn’t even thought about it.

“On top.” He says watching your hesitation. He waits until you get into bed and are comfy before he sits on the other side. You lie down watching him, he’s slow as he swings his legs over almost like he’s trying not to spook you. It doesn’t feel weird. You thought it would having another man in your bed.

It was more weird seeing him in your living room for the first time then right now. Maybe you’re just used to him. Maybe you really do trust him. Maybe you judged him too harshly. He turns on his side looking at you. You move your arm  out from under the covers, you want to touch him, maybe he wouldn’t like that though. You place it down instead. 

“Do you get nightmares?” You ask. 

“All the time.” He replies.

“About your time as a soldier?” 

“And other things.” He says. You sigh. 

“Tell me about how you met Price, and Johnny and Kyle.” You see a smile form on his lips. 

“On one condition.” He says shuffling his body down so his head is level with yours. 

“What?” you ask.

“Promise me no nightmares tonight.” You chuckle. 

“I can’t control that.” 

“Promise.” He says raising an eyebrow. 

“Okay I promise.” You say sighing, even though it’s completely out of your control. His hand moves back up to your face brushing a strand of hair behind your ear. 

“I’ll leave when you fall asleep.” He promises. You try to argue with him telling him the bed is comfier then the sofa but he won’t have it. You relent feeling tired, you try to clear your mind and not think about anything just listen to Simon talk about how he met everyone. His voice is calming, his presence puts you at ease. You wish he could stay. You don’t remember falling asleep but that night you dream about him. Good dreams, you’re on a date. Christ you’re falling for him.

—————————— 

You wake to the sun peaking through the bedroom blinds. Simon is not in the room anymore. You slip out of bed and head into the living room. He’s already awake sat at the kitchen table, flicking through a tablet. 

“Morning,” You say walking over to him. 

“Morning,” he replies turning the tablet off. 

“How long have you been awake?” You ask clicking the kettle on. 

“An hour or so.” He says, rubbing his neck.

“I told you you should have taken the bed.” You say taking out two mugs. “Tea?” 

“Please, one sugar.” He says. You think back to last night him lying in the bed with you. You could have swore you felt his hands touching you, brushing your cheek, your hair. Maybe that was just part of the dream. It was a good dream. The best dream you’ve had in months. This is the first time in years you felt safe in your own flat. The click of the kettle snaps you back to reality and you pour the tea’s bringing them over to the table. 

“What were you looking at?” You ask gesturing at the tablet.

“Today's jobs.” Oh shit work! Your head snaps round looking at the clock on the wall it’s all ready 10am. 

“Shit!” You say pushing your chair back. Simon grabs your wrist, you panic. He imminently lets go when your head snaps back to him wide eyed. 

“I called Price, told him we were taking the morning off.” You take a breath in and sit back down, sipping your tea to calm your nerves. He watches you like he’s trying to see how you’re going to react. You smile at him, letting him know you’re okay.

He picks up his mug taking a sip. You’re about to ask him what he want’s to do this morning when there is a crash in the living room. It’s so loud it makes you shriek. Your body snaps round in the chair as you look at the shattered glass now all over the living room. You go to stand up.

“Stay there.” Simon says his hand on your shoulder pushing you back down as he heads over to the balcony door. He goes out looking over the balcony up and down. Leaning round the corners. You guess he doesn't see anything, you can’t think all you can feel is your heart rapidly beating in your chest. He comes back in closing the door and walks round the flat looking for something till he finds it. He picks it up it’s a brick with a letter tied to it. He takes the letter off the brick and opens it, something falls out on the floor and he picks it up. You’re holding your breath, as Simon walks back over to you. It looks like he’s looking through a stack of photos. He places them on the table.

“Well now we have proof.” He says standing next to you as you fan the photo’s out. It’s pictures of you, from yesterday, a few days ago, when you went shopping on Sunday. There are even pictures of you inside your flat. Your head snaps to the window trying to even see where he could have even snapped them from. Panic builds inside you as you continue to look over the photos. Is this a threat? What does this mean? You look up at Simon who’s reading the letter that came with the photos. 

“What does it say?” You ask him, but you really don’t know if you want to know. 

“Let’s just say he’s not happy.” Simon says looking down at you. You didn’t even realise you are gripping his shirt. Maybe this plan was a bad idea.

Next

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[conqllr]

SUGGESTIVE DILF HEADCANONS ! ( fem reader )

warnings. age gap, suggestive, a bit of power imbalance, pet names like 'baby' n 'sweetheart' etc etc

he loves loves loooves it when you wear his clothes. especially when there's nothing else underneath. you just look so adorable and it feels so intimate that the older man couldn't help but be completely weak towards you.

no matter what matters he's tending to, he'll drop it in a heartbeat the moment he sees you in his shirt. chatting with a longtime friend? he's gonna have to call them back. an important business call? he has an even more important matter to focus on. doing errands? taking care of household matters like bills, taxes, things your pretty little head never has to worry about? he's taking off those reading glasses of his and leaning back in his chair, head tilting slightly as he admired your figure standing in his doorway, acting so innocent as if you don't know how much of an affect you have on him. nothing else comes before you, his darling love.

he'll pat his thigh, motioning you to come over and sit yourself pretty on his lap. he'll hold you so securely once you do, making sure you're comfortable on him and strong arms wrapping around you. maybe his wandering hands will get a little impatient and touch you somewhere, but you never minded.

he’s gonna have fun teasing you back tenfold if you're inexperienced. what's wrong? where did all that talk go? didn't you love to make fun of his old age? now look who's crying and begging for him to make things feel good because you have absolutely no idea how to :(

but don't worry. he’s not a mean person and he definitely won't be very very mean to you if you get upset by it !! he'll have his fun making you beg for it for a bit before chuckling and leaning in to give you sweet forehead kisses, calling you his good baby for being so polite, patient, and sweet <3 he promises to spoil his pretty princess now

he lets out the loudest moan and the heaviest groan when he sees his darling girl ride him. the way you're exposing all of yourself to him without shame, lips curling up into a sultry smile that captivated the older man in your first meeting as you giggled and teased him for being such a pervert!

old man is definitely getting all tired and exhausted if you have a high sex drive :( don't get him wrong, he's well-built for his age and definitely has the stamina for it, but how much can a man in his mid-forties keep up with a young woman in her prime?

you're clinging onto him and begging him silently with those adorable eyes of yours, pressing yourself firmly against him, skin-to-skin without shame, and he already knows you desired another round. it hasn't even been twenty minutes since your last one! he's raising a brow at you and throwing his head back with a loud sigh before chuckling and pressing the sweetest kiss to your forehead. he's gonna give it to you, of course. he loves spoiling his baby <3

he is definitely messy in bed. the usual composed and respectable man who wears a three-piece suit to work lives to ravish you in his bed.

he likes coating you all over. it doesn't matter that you just got your hair done, just use his card and go to the salon again tomorrow. he misjudged his strength and “accidentally” ripped apart your lingerie, or the cute matching set that you just recently bought? he’s sorry, but you’ve got his card anyway, right? just use them to buy more!

[buckymorelikefuckme]

I think it would be great! Plus, l have a request. What if, bucky and y/n are getting married (plus y/n is a shy one 🙂) and y/n never drank any alcohol before and on the other hand, bucky, Has already drank alcohol more than he can count. So, they go wine tasting. A week before their wedding and while they're half way doing the wine thing y/n starts to get dizzy and feeling a bit hot. To which she doesn't know that she's starting to get tipsy and bucky notices it. And with that, that means she has a low tolerance in alcohol. And when the wine take its effects, She's all goofy and doing anything without a care in the world even if it's embarrassing herself as if all her shyness is gone

thanks so much for the prompt and for your patience :) i hope you like it!

bucky barnes x reader

words: 427

Perhaps, Bucky thinks, he may have misjudged just how much of a lightweight you'd be.

You'd told him early on in your relationship that you didn't drink, not because of any other reason than you being kind of scared of making a fool of yourself. He'd thought it was cute and never pushed you to drink whenever the two of you went out on dates or to hang out with friends.

Now, you're engaged and a week away from the wedding, and the last thing that needed preparing was the wine. It was Natasha’s idea to go to a wine tasting and you were a little unsure, but then Bucky said it could be a sweet, romantic getaway before the big day. You agreed easily after that.

And besides, how bad could it really be?

“Jesus, fuck, where's the air-con in this place?” you whine, quite loudly, pulling other people’s attention towards where you and Bucky were seated.

He offers everyone an apologetic smile and turns back to you, rubbing a soothing hand along your back. “Baby, we’re outdoors. There isn't any air conditioning.”

You whine again, head flopping onto his shoulder. “But it's so hot, Bucky.”

“I think you're just a little drunk, baby,” he replies with a soft laugh.

You only had a glass and a half before you started complaining about your cheeks feeling hot, and another two glasses for your eyes to go glassy. He's been fascinated, in all honesty. He's never seen someone get drunk so fast.

“Nuh-uh!” you protest, lifting your head to blink heavy lidded eyes at him.

Bucky grins and brushes your hair away from your face. “Okay,” he agrees, placating, “but maybe we should head back to the hotel.”

You blink at him again and then you smile, slow and suggestive, tilting your chin down as you slide a hand high up on his thigh.

“Yeah? Wanna do naughty things to me?”

He catches your hand before it reaches his groin, torn between laughing and groaning. “Not when you're drunk,” he retorts gently.

Inexplicably, your eyes begin to water. “You don't want me?” you ask in a pitiful tone.

“I always want you, baby,” Bucky responds immediately. “You know you drive me crazy, can hardly control myself around you. “

“Oh,” you beam, tears forgotten. You lean into his space and plant a wet, messy kiss on his lips. “Okay. Take me home, big guy.”

When you wake up the next morning, hungover and pouting, you make Bucky swear to keep you away from the wine during the reception.

[qsycomplainsalot]

one of the things that concern me greatly in tumblr leftist circles i've seen is that acceptance (and propping up) of AI art and tools as sth that will liberate the masses. It's sth i've seen a lot of big leftist and communist accounts espouse and it feels misjudged, coming from a position of seeing artists and writers as petit-bourgeois rather than also workers i feel

so that argument w the miku communist is an example of trying to justify AI tools as legitimate creation when... they really are not. like, im a writer, and there is a real tangible difference to be felt when trying to will sth into existence versus putting in an ai prompt to give you sth to work off. Maybe what you enjoy more is editing rather than the act of creation itself, but AI tools lack something that leaves the pieces extremely dry compared to the messiness a human creates when they attempt to write sth from the very beginning

Yeah 100%. It's fine to steal from artists because they're an elite class with unattainable power uwu Meanwhile they also devolve into ableist rhetoric about how it's the only way for disabled people to make art. It's a big neon green uncomfortable af piece of astroturfing and they're just dancing on it because it's easier than to stop using the instant gratification machine.

[sepublic]

I think there’s definitely a point about how some swap AUs are ultimately aesthetical, with characters switching personalities but everything else just being the same. Because I think there’s a lot of potential in reimagining the same arcs and storylines but from a different perspective.

Think The Owl House! It would be easy for a swap AU with Amity as the protagonist to have her be happy go lucky like Luz, while Luz isn’t; But I think it’s more interesting to consider Amity’s arc of lowering her shell and rediscovering herself. The same can be said for Lilith as her mentor, and how the tropes change when the perspective changes.

So for Amity, an episode with her and Luz could be about Luz coming across as like, an annoying cringey kid who’s kind of overbearing. She easily gets into mischief and seems a troublemaker. And Amity just wants peace and quiet, so she dismisses Luz as a delinquent. She’s relieved to be alone.

But eventually, the rebuking of Luz leads to some consequences, and it turns into the type of lesson where straitlaced Amity realizes she was too harsh to this peer that just wanted friendship; Likewise, she misunderstood Luz, who shows a nuanced side that Amity does not expect. Luz might get to explain her side of the incident in a flashback; She does not always mean to get into trouble, and even then maybe Amity could learn to lighten up?

So it’s the lesson about how this ‘loser’ has a lot more to them than meets the eye, that maybe you shouldn’t be so haughty and give other people a chance you’d normally never consider because they have feelings, they’re lonely and think they’re the hero just like you. In a way it’s like Luz’s The Intruder with King, but definitely harsher. Or how Amity’s own siblings come across as just mean delinquents, but there’s more to them than that in later episodes. It’s Covention or Lost in Language but from Amity’s POV.

Part of Amity and Lilith’s arc could be realizing the status quo they’ve been looking up to and have participated in isn’t so great; A broken pedestal, gradual realization. For Lilith, maybe she doesn’t need fame and attention, just love from a select few people (like King in Sense and Insensitivity). Luz, Eda, and King are troublemaking side characters that could seem like a bad crowd, but in reality they’ve got a point and they’re misunderstood; This time the story is in the protagonists misjudging them only to realize otherwise. And so it’s a lesson about coming to an understanding with others different, a story about learning to let loose and have fun.

Imagine a different kind of Agony of a Witch, with the climax of Lilith admitting she cursed Eda and her regret, it’s her deepest shame; But there isn’t the same circumstances causing her to scream this in resentment after already crossing a line, more Lilith beginning to come to terms with her faults and how she mistreated Eda after realizing throughout the season that the regime she’s been a part of has darker parts she didn’t see.

The episode could also be about Lilith going off to rescue Eda, or grappling with being forced to capture her. Amity confronting her causes Lilith to admit a lot of the baggage behind this task and why she’s so agitated over it all. Maybe it leads to witch and mentor realizing they understand each other a lot, as Amity also hurt Willow and kept a key detail about it secret in shame.

Maybe Amity realizes then why her mentor was so understanding when she learned how her apprentice betrayed someone close to her. She doesn’t appreciate the grace any less, in fact it feels good to be understood and Amity wishes Lilith had been upfront about it, so they could both support one another; But they can start now.

The process for Lilith is a lot less messy, with the story being about someone coming to terms with their guilt but meaning well and coming clean because of it; And to Lilith’s surprise, Eda is glad to see her sister finally come around! More specifically, the progress Lilith had been making beforehand, learning to look the other way for Eda and come to an understanding with her, is what convinces Eda to be gracious; So all of the development for Lilith leads to this point.

I think working with the established character arcs and considering how this story would be reconfigured under the usual tone is a fun writing exercise. It’s definitely more of a challenge, but I find it rewarding for how it can emphasize the whole ‘Everyone is the hero of their own story’ when their story is still that same story, as is everyone, by the end of the day. It’s the question of, How would they make sense as the main protagonists, or side characters? What archetypes and tropes would they fall under? And getting to explore your pre-existing characters through someone else’s eyes in their story; Stuff like this is why I enjoyed Something Ventured, Someone Framed for having Luz from the perspective of Gus, for example!

[builtbybrokenbells]

builtbybrokenbells ─── ⋆⋅☼⋅⋆ masterlist ⋆⋅☼⋅⋆ ───

— ⋆⋅☼⋅⋆ ─── ⋆⋅☼⋅⋆ ─── ⋆⋅☼⋅⋆ —

hi! welcome to the shitstorm! if you’ve read any of my works already and came to check out some more, thanks!!! also, if you’ve left any comment on my stuff i have def read them and appreciated them dearly :)

requests: OPEN (please be respectful and patient with me, I’ll do my best to get to them as soon as I can!)

taglists: please specify if you want to be on a general taglist, a fic taglist, or for a specific person 🫶🏻

disclaimer: i do not know gvf or any of the members. tis’ all fiction and imagination and i will never claim otherwise! also, i try to keep my works 100% original; i do not read as much as i write, and i would hate for someone to think im copying them in any way. also, please don’t steal my stuff :) also, i’ve said it before and i will say it again. please be kind to me and everyone else. this blog is a safe spot. my feelings get hurt easily, and i will not stand for any disrespect towards others. thanks in advance 🫶🏻

♡ - fluff, ☾ - smut, ★ - angst

as always, be kind, stay happy, and shoot me a message anytime if you want to chat!

t’s fic rec list

— ⋆⋅☼⋅⋆ ─── ⋆⋅☼⋅⋆ ─── ⋆⋅☼⋅⋆ —

Josh Kiszka

Long Time Coming ☾ ★

The one in which y/n can’t handle Josh’s eccentric personality. An altercation at the bar leads her to see a side of him that she never saw before. A personal family struggle causes a blowout and leaves her wondering if she had misjudged Josh a bit too much. (Josh x f!reader, SMUT 18+) ONE SHOT | 8.3K

It’s Never Over ♡ ☾ ★

A year and a half after a devastating breakup, y/n finds herself face to face with the boy she’d spent months trying to fall out of love with. although separated, neither her nor Josh found it within themselves to forget about each other. they’re faced with the choice to let history repeat itself, or walk away for good. (Josh x f!reader, SMUT 18+) ONE SHOT | 17.7k

Lex Talionis Masterlist | ☾ ★ | ON HOLD

LEX TALIONIS: the law of retaliation, whereby a punishment resembles the offense committed in kind and degree | The one in which a player, who is fantastically gifted in her ability to play, finally gets a taste of her own medicine. SERIES | ON HOLD

Blurbs

Flowers ♡

— ⋆⋅☼⋅⋆ ─── ⋆⋅☼⋅⋆ ─── ⋆⋅☼⋅⋆ —

Jake Kiszka

Complicated ♡ ★

Growing up as Josh’s best friend was fantastic, but his twin brother held a separate, special place in y/n’s heart. A time lapse of an undying, embarrassing high school crush. (Jake x f!reader) ONE SHOT | 14K

Spitfire Masterlist ♡ ☾ ★

An enigmatic girl at a bar catches the attention of a young guitarist, enticing him just by existing. In an attempt to get to know her, she gets away before he even learns her last name. He’s stuck wondering if fate will be on his side, wishing for just one chance to make her his (Jake x f!reader, series, SMUT 18+) FINISHED | 66k

The Green-Eyed Monster ☾ ★

Alcohol and sour moods don’t mix; learning that the hard way, y/n navigates her long time boyfriend’s jealousy for the first time. In attempt to ignore it, she quickly finds herself caught up in a toxic game of who can piss the other off the most. (Jake x f!reader, SMUT 18+) ONE SHOT | 17k

Gold Dust Woman Masterlist ♡ ☾ ★

Y/n finds herself completely in love with Sam with no hope of ever recovering. After months of waiting, hoping for a bit of reciprocity, she spends a night drinking his memory away. But, as we know, liquor never solves an issue, and always has the potential to create another. One messy hookup leaves leaves her undeniably in lust with the worst possible person: his brother, Jake. (Jake x f!reader, series, Sam x f!reader, love triangle, SMUT 18+) FINISHED | 190k

Guilty Pleasures ♡ ☾ ★

Due to a strong foundation of trust and a willingness to share, a situation which would normally be catastrophic seems to turn out to be quite rewarding. (Danny x f!reader, Jake x f!reader, SMUT 18+) ONE SHOT | 20.4k

Capital Vices Masterlist | ♡ ☾ ★

Religion never seems important until you’ve engaged in so much sin that salvation is no longer an option. (Jake Kiszka x f!reader, series, SMUT 18+) FINISHED | 120k

Reaching New Heights

Jake walks in on y/n during some particularly interesting alone time, opening them up to a whole new world (Jake Kiszka x f!reader, SMUT 18+) ONE SHOT | 11k

Lex Talionis Masterlist | ☾ ★ | ON HOLD

LEX TALIONIS: the law of retaliation, whereby a punishment resembles the offense committed in kind and degree | The one in which a player, who is fantastically gifted in her ability to play, finally gets a taste of her own medicine. (Jake Kiszka x f!reader, Josh Kiszka x f!reader, SMUT 18+) SERIES | WIP

Partners In Crime | ♡ ★

The cure for heartbreak is truth, but what do you do when the truth is the source of heartbreak itself? (Jake Kiszka x f!reader) ONE SHOT | 9k

Rotten Apple | ♡ ☾ ★

Karma takes form in the strangest of ways. (Jake Kiszka x f!reader, SMUT 18+) ONE SHOT | 16k

Heartbreak Hot Seat | ♡ ☾ ★

Jake Kiszka seems to have the perfect remedy for a broken heart. (Jake Kiszka x f!reader, SMUT 18+) ONE SHOT | 20k

Poolsides & Pizza Boxes | part 2 | some time later | ♡ ☾ ★

Alcohol and secrets make for a deadly combination. (Jake Kiszka x f!reader, SMUT 18+) TWO PART SERIES | 35k

Little Miss Sunshine | ♡ ☾ ★

One little confession leaves you second guessing everything you’ve ever known about Jake Kiszka. (Jake Kiszka x f!reader, SMUT 18+) ONE SHOT | 26k

Melodic Memories Masterlist | ♡ ☾ ★

In a tattered old box shoved deep down in the corner of an overfilled closet, a lifetimes worth of memories lie dormant at the bottom waiting to be rediscovered. (Jake Kiszka x f!reader, series, SMUT 18+) SERIES | WIP

Veni, Vidi, Vici ♡ ☾ ★ | coming soon 🤍

A collaboration with the lovely @jakeyt

Blurbs

Doing each others hair ♡

Confessing feelings ♡

Bringing home a stray kitten ♡

Jake loves dogs, but you own a cat ♡

— ⋆⋅☼⋅⋆ ─── ⋆⋅☼⋅⋆ ─── ⋆⋅☼⋅⋆ —

Sam Kiszka

Hate To Love You | part two | part three | ♡ ☾ ★

Sam and y/n spent months hating each other, but a drunk confession and a bathroom hookup leads to more trouble than they bargained for. (Sam x f!reader with a Danny love triangle, series, SMUT 18+) FINISHED | 25k

Picasso | aftermath | ♡ ☾

COLLEGE DORM AU y/n finds herself pining after the boy across the hall, taken by surprise after a series of events reveals that he feels the same way. An unconventional hookup leads to Sam making her first time unforgettable, both hoping for a romance to blossom from it. (Sam x f!reader, AU, SMUT 18+) ONE SHOT | 15.5k

Gold Dust Woman Masterlist ♡ ☾ ★

Y/n finds herself completely in love with Sam with no hope of ever recovering. After months of waiting, hoping for a bit of reciprocity, she spends a night drinking his memory away. But, as we know, liquor never solves an issue, and always has the potential to create another. One messy hookup leaves leaves her undeniably in lust with the worst possible person: his brother, Jake. (Sam x f!reader, series, Jake x f!reader, love triangle, SMUT 18+) FINISHED | 190k

Catch-22 Masterlist ♡ ☾ ★ WIP | ON HOLD

Catch-22: a dilemma or difficult circumstance from which there is no escape because of mutually conflicting or dependent conditions. | Even if you knew every word to exist in every language known to man, you would still be certain that there was no better way to describe your relationship with Sam Kiszka. SERIES | ON HOLD

Blurbs

Early Morning Fluff ♡

Kissing in the rain ♡

Sam giving you his sweater ♡

— ⋆⋅☼⋅⋆ ─── ⋆⋅☼⋅⋆ ─── ⋆⋅☼⋅⋆ —

Daniel Wagner

Bugs, Bears, and a Thunderstorm ♡ ☾

Y/n is not particularly enthusiastic about a camping trip. A set of unfortunate circumstances ensues, turning out to give the best possible conclusion to the situation. She realizes that maybe camping isn’t so bad, after all. (Danny x f!reader, SMUT 18+) ONE SHOT | 12.5K

Fade Into You ♡ ★

A bad day leaves y/n searching for solace in her boyfriend, Danny. He’s quick to the rescue, showing his unconditional love and willingness to help however he can. (Danny x f!reader) ONE SHOT | 6k

Guilty Pleasures ♡ ☾ ★

Due to a strong foundation of trust and a willingness to share, a situation which would normally be catastrophic seems to turn out to be quite rewarding. (Danny x f!reader, Jake x f!reader, SMUT 18+) ONE SHOT | 20.4k

Belladonna ♡ ☾ ★ | WIP

Too beautiful to resist, and too deadly to survive; the tragic tale of belladonna in all its glory. SERIES | WIP

Veni, Vidi, Vici ♡ ☾ ★ | coming soon 🤍

A collaboration with the lovely @jakeyt

Blurbs

Doing each others hair ♡

Danny helping when you’re overwhelmed ♡

In the rain ♡

— ⋆⋅☼⋅⋆ ─── ⋆⋅☼⋅⋆ ─── ⋆⋅☼⋅⋆ —

[asmutwriter]

Captain Hook x F!Reader

DESCRIPTION: You decide to have a fun day out at the beach with your friends. Accidently bumping into one of the most feared pirates during your travel.

A/N - This is my first time doing a request so I do hope that you enjoy :)

WORD COUNT: 2654

WARNINGS: implied violence, swearing, kidnapping, smut, nipple play, temperature play, oral (f recieving), fingering, p in v, unprotected smut, creampie, sub reader, dom Hook, praise

This is fiction. Please always talk to your partner before doing anything and make sure they are ok with what you are doing beforehand

"There’s no one here" you say. Looking out the passenger car window at the beautiful sandy beach before you. Considering the sunny day, and the fact it was a weekend, you were expecting more people.

You get out the car after your friend parks. Shielding your eyes with your hand. Spotting a family in the distance, as well as what appears to be a couple closer to the car park.

"I told you it’d be quiet. Its why I love this beach. There’s never anyone here"

"Yet you’ve never stopped to question why?"

"Its just because there are rumours" she smiles, a pretend wickedness as she tries to deepen her voice "rumours of smugglers, thieves, pirates, and everything else that scares people off". She makes her voice normal again, giving a small shrug with her next statement. "I figure that, if we do come across them, then we could fight them off. If we meet any of them".

You roll your eyes. Grabbing your towel. The three of you head to the sand. You lay your towel onto the floor. Grabbing the bottom of your sundress and pulling it up over your head. Leaving you in your one piece.

"I still think you could rock a bikini". You chuckle. Sitting on the towel and shoving the dress into your bag. Taking out some sunglass and placing them over your eyes.

"I feel more secure like this" she laughs. The two of them also disrobing down to bathing suits. You lie down. Beach towel under you. Sunglasses on. Hair done up in a messy bun. You had your eyes shut as you bathed in the summer glow of the sun above you. Hearing the waves crash against the sand. The distinct sound of your two friends by your side.

"Hey Y/N!" you hear one of them call out. You open one eye. Looking over you see your friend holding a frisbee. She wiggles her eyebrows at you. "Want to play?"

"You know I do". You stand. Brushing the sand off of yourself. You go over, joining your two friends a little way away from where you had been previously lying. Standing in a triangle as the three of you take it in turns throwing it to one another.

One friend throws it towards you. Misjudging it completely as it flies over your head. Towards the water. "Shit" she mutters. You laugh. Turning as you do a light jog to catch the frisbee. Hearing your friends calling your name as you bend down. Paying them no mind, thinking their just telling you to 'run faster' or somethng. You take the item in hand. Brushing the sand from it as you stand up.

Your body stills as you feel something cold and charp on your shoulder. Tilting your head upwards. Eyes meeting someones. Stubble. Red hat. And a sword resting near your neck. He grins at you. You hear your friends call out your name again. More frantic this time. You bring the frisbee up. Jabbing it into his neck. The suddenness and pain in his throat causes him to drop the sword. You turn. Dropping the frisbee onto the floor as you go to run.

"Go!" you yell out to your friends. Watching as they run too. Grabbing their bags and various items from where you had previously sat. Your legs start to move in quick momentum, seconds before you feel a sharp pain through the back of your head.

-

You come to. Feeling a headache begin to take place as you hear voices. The soft swaying of the floor under you. The memories from the past day come back as you swiftly open your eyes. You see a bunch of men. Your eyes scanning quickly as you count five. All with swords or guns around their waists as they appear to mock each other. You were sat on some sort of barrel. Arms tied behind your back. A towel loosely draped over your shoulders.

"Oh good" a voice speaks next to you. You look. A shorter, mildly less intimidating man stands next to you. "You’re awake. The captain will be happy that you’re awake".

"Why am I here?" you whisper through gritted teeth. Trying to fight your bindings.

"Well you see-"

"I wanted new crew members" a deeper voice speaks out. You turn your head. You see a tall man, long hair, and a dark moustache come out from near the front of the ship. Near to where you're sitting. His eyes meet yours as he smiles at you. "Now my plan was to have you and your friends join me. But you managed to make them run away before I could grab you all". You remain silent. Eyes watching him as he comes over to you. He kneels onto one knee. Bringing a hand up. Well, a hook. Placing it under your chin. The coldness of the metal hurting your skin.

"Why don’t we have a little chat in my private office?". He reaches the hook behind you. Feeling him undo the restraints arund your wrist in one small swipe. You jump at the action. He stands. Holding his actual hand out for you to take. You do. Trying to control your hand from shaking like a leaf in the wind as he takes you to his office.

Shutting the door behind you as you go in. Your hands grabbing the towel and wrapping it around yourself more as you stay standing. "Please can I go home. I-I wont tell anyone. I promise. I just want to go home". You watch as he walks over to his desk. Resting against it.

"I told you - I need new crew mates. And you made the other candidates run away. Therefore you are my only choice". Your clench your jaw. Shutting your eyes as you try to regain your thoughts.

"But I’m a woman". You speak. Confidence in your voice as you open your eyes. "Don’t you know that it’s bad luck to have a woman on board your ship". He lets out a soft chuckle.

"I do not believe that a woman as beautiful as you could cause any sort of bad luck". You feel your cheeks turn slightly red at the notion.

"But you’re a pirate" you whisper.

"I prefer the term captain". He folds his arms over himself as he scans his eyes over your body. "What is your name?".

"Y/N"

"Well, Y/N, lucky for you I’m feeling generous today. So how about I give you a proposition? You stay on my ship for a week. Help out the crew, eat and drink to your hearts content. But if you still hear land calling your name then I will allow you to go back to your home"

"A week?"

"Of course, you could leave now if you’d like. In fact, you are free to leave whenever you would like. But I warn you, its a long swim back to the main land". You scoff slightly, turning your head as you grit your teeth.

"Deal" you say. Turning your head back to meet his gaze. He smiles. Unfolding his arms as he goes over to a trunk. Opening it he pulls out a variety of clothes. Trousers and shirts. He places them on top of the trunk.

"Get dressed. We have work to do"

-

Captain Hook had asked to see you in his office. You thought you were in trouble due to his stern nature, but soon realised it was due to your agreement. It had been a week since he'd found you on the beach. So today was the day that you needed to decide if you were staying or going.

He sat at his desk. Waiting for your response. You fiddle with the sleeve of your shirt. He takes in a breath through his nose. Hands - well his hand and hook - layed on the table. "I've seen how you are with the rest of the crew. You love the work and the people. You get on well with them. I've never seen Starkey so happy to see.. anyone before". You chuckle slightly. Looking down as you fold your arms. "You should stay"

"I can't just leave my friends and family. They will be worried about me"

"You can send a postcard"

"But-"

"You enjoy it here, correct?". You nod. "Then why go back to your mundane life when you can stay here. With us. Where you could have gold and all sorts of riches. All with a simple flick of the wrist and its yours". You bring your head back up. "You could have anything you want. Just ask". You take in a breath. Your eyes scanning his.

"I want to go back to my family" he nods. Pushing himself up off the table.

"We will be pulling up to land within the hour. You may leave when we dock". Coming over to you. Using his hook to gently brush away the hair from your face. "I will miss you, Y/N" he puts the item under your chin. Lifting your head up as you meet his dark eyes. A short moment passes. He bends down. Gently placing his lips onto yours. You shut your eyes at the soft embrace. Feeling him pull away, your eyes flutter open again.

"What was that for?". He half smiles.

"A goodbye". You smile at him. Your hands coming up to cup his face as you kiss him. A more solid, yet soft kiss. Moving away as you go to take a step back. His hand coming to your lower waist as he pulls you into him. He bends down and kisses you. Hard. Your hands fists at his jacket. His hand comes up. Removing his hat and placing it down onto the chair. Going back to your lower spine. He moves you backwards. A soft gasp leaving your lips as you come into contact with his desk.

He wastes no time. Wrapping both his arms fully around you. Lifting you up onto the top of the counter. His hand coming to your front. He moves away. Eyes watching yours as he brings his hand up slowly. Over your stomach. Between your breasts. Moving to the side as he rests his palm over the clothed boob. You let out a gentle sigh as he begins massaging it.

His lips crashing onto yours again. Being a harsh contrast to the treatment he's giving your chest. He moves away. His hook going to the top of your shirt. Before you can question him, he drags down the sharp object. Ripping your shirt from you. Your hands go to your torso. Covering yourself as your cheeks redden. He kisses you. Gently removing your hands from you as he rests his forehead onto yours. Meeting your eyes.

"Let me show you how beautiful you are". He kisses you again. His hand going behind your back. Unclasping the bra and tossing it onto the floor. Running his metal hook over your nipples. You flinch at the coldness. Your nubs rising almost instantly. He smiles. Bending down and taking one of them into his mouth.

"Holy shit" you mutter. Your hand going to his hair. Thankfully he'd already removed his hat so you could easily grip his dark locks with your fingers. You shut your eyes. So focused on his tongue on your skin that you hardly register his wondering hand. Instinctively moving your hips as he removes your trousers and underwear. Only fully registering where his hand is when he presses his thumb onto your clit.

You jolt slightly. Causing him to move backwards at the sudden movement. Your eyes screwed shut as he rubs gentle circles onto your nub. Your mouth a silent 'o'. He removes his thumb. Before you can protest at the lack of contact, he's replaced the digit with his tongue. Pressing it firmly onto you. Your hands still remained in his hair as you pull him closer to you. The wet muscle dragging, moving, flicking, over your sensitive hole.

You feel his hand come up. Letting out a truly sinful moan as you feel him push a finger in. Then another. Curling them at the same speed that he moves his tongue. "Fuck. Fuck. I'm-I'm gonna cum".

"What do good girls say?" he murmurs against your wet cunt.

"P-please?"

"Please what?"

"Can I cum? Please. Please can I cum?" you beg. Feeling his grin against you as he hums an answer. With that you feel your orgasm wash over you. Filling your body. From your fuzzy brain down to your curling toes. Your pussy tightening around his digits as your fingers lock their grip on his hair.

Loosening as your high fades. Keeping his steady gaze with dazed eyes as he stands up straight. Seeing his moustache glisten with your juices, but you're too fucked out to feel embarrassed. "Open my sweet". You do. Your tongue sticking out slightly. Feeling him place his fingers onto it. You close around the digits. The taste of your essence filling your mouth. A soft moan leaving your lips before he removes his fingers with a soft popping noise.

You hear vague noises. Not paying them much mind. That is until you feel soft lips hit yours again. Opening your eyes you meet your captains dark ones. Filled with lust and longing as he looks at you. His hand on your cheek. "Do you think you can take my cock?". Your eyes glance downwards. Connecting the noise. He must've removed his clothes in that short time as you can see his broad and defined torso, and proudly standing shaft.

You bite your lip slightly before meeting his eyes again. Nodding. He smiles. Standing up straight as he lines himself up with your hole. You grip at the edge of the table as he pushes himself into you. A strangled groan leaving your throat as he bottoms out. Feeling his hips mold so perfectly into yours. His hand comes up, cupping each of your breasts before moving his hand to your hip.

Your eyes shut, throwing your head back. Starting the movement is slow. Gentle as you adjust to him. His foreplay had done wonders as you take him fully. Feeling him hitting that spot so perfectly inside of you. "Look at me Y/N" he says. His voice a deep gruff. You open your eyes. Yours glazed over from being cock drunk. His filled with a yearning as he fastens his pace. He brings his hook down. Careful to angle it in a way that wont cause either of you harm, but so that the harsh coldness hits your clit.

You tighten around him. Gasping as you arch your back. He rubs the cold metal against your core as he continues to piston into you. "P-Please" you manage to let out. Broken speech as your brain turns to mush. "Wan- cum". He smiles. Leaning over slightly as he kisses you. His hips and hand still working on your most sensitive parts.

"Cum for me". You shut your eyes. Clenching around him as your orgasm washes over you. Knuckles turning white from your grip on the wood beneath you. A drawn out moan leaving your lips as you shut your eyes. He grunts. His nails digging into your skin as he pushes himself into you. A soft smile coming over your face as you feel his seed spill into your clenching pussy. His hips move slowly until he stops. Feeling him become soft inside of you before he pulls out.

Grabbing your ripped shirt from the floor he uses it to clean you both up. You let out a soft whine in protest as he touches you. Grabbing your jacket and wrapping it around your torso. Your eyes flutter open as you feel him lean over your body. Gently kissing your forehead.

"That was a very, very good goodbye".

TAGS

@disney-girl67

[who-knew-a-sheep-can-write]

Sketches: Arthur Morgan x Plus-Sized!Reader (Semi-NSFW)

Nothing sexual, just drawings of a naked reader

From the moment you first met him, you would have never guessed that he could be this soft and gentle as a person. You had seen his hands bruised and bloodied, knuckles split and fingertips rubbed raw to the point they split open from the many fist fights and bar brawls he had been in. His hands, large and powerful like that of a bear, calloused from years of a hard life on the run, were not meant to be rest other than the little bit of peace he got when he would pass out after a horribly long day. His body, riddled with many scars, divots and healed over gashes, he had convinced himself that he would never let another see it in any way domestic after Mary.

He had convinced himself that he would never be able to live a domestic life.

Whenever he would ride into town or past the many farmhouses that dotted the southern countryside, he couldn’t help but feel envious at the sight of the many families that built up farms and towns. He yearned to have a life other than crime, but it was all he knew.

He almost didn’t believe he was alive when you both had started to fancy each other. Really, for Arthur, it was the moment you had joined in on the gang as it had really been your only hope at this point. He thought his brain had finally started to take a hike to nowhere when he caught you multiple times glancing at him - especially when he would stand up from picking something heavy up. You always looked away quickly, finding something immediately to occupy yourself and especially your hands, turning away to hide your heating face.

It wasn’t until you both found yourselves drunk in a dirty saloon, clinging onto each other while laughing at nothing like fools in love, barely managing to dance with each other as the pianist chimed away at the ivory keys that you both fell in love.

You had horribly misjudged Arthur upon first meeting him. Even as you laid next to him in his tent, your soft and plush body pushed up right against his rock-hard one, you still found yourself feeling so remorseful for thinking he was just some brute.

Arthur loved how warm you were. Some nights in his tent were brutal when horrible weather set in over the camp, especially when it rain and the winds howled outside, threatening to blow his tent right over. He loved how soft you were even more.

He felt like it was oh so wrong for his hands to grace your soft skin, but he loved it with every fiber of his being. He loved tracing shapes into your plush thighs without a thought in his mind. He loved digging his large hands into your wide hips to bring you closer to him. He loves coming into the tent after a long day of dealing with Dutch’s bullshit to bury his head in your stomach and hold you tightly as you combed your fingers through his hair.

It only made his heart ache something awful when he would be away from camp for days on end, whether it was somehow scraping together supplies for camp or chasing down jobs. Arthur always made sure to bring his journal wherever he went, but even more so now. Between the pages where he logged his thoughts in messy scripture and small doodles of whatever he came across, he would find himself writing about you. Sometimes it was little poems he would come up with on the spot so quickly he swore a child could write better. Sometimes it was him logging what you had said to him that clouded his mind, rooting in and flourishing like a field of flowers.

But what Arthur had been scribbling in his journal lately was something he even found himself flushing at: Your body. He didn’t mean to at first, but his hands had worked faster than his brain could process. But after the first sketch of you, he just had to do another, and then another in a different pose, and the one of you in a pose only he could see in the comforts of his tent.

That’s where Arthur found himself now, in his tent in the dead of night. The rest of the gang had finally gone to bed except for you the two of you. Arthur was lounged on his cot, his journal tucked up on his propped leg as the other hung off, his heel tapping against the hard ground. His eyes were trained on his journal, forest green hues dazed with lust, fingers were shaking ever so slightly, his fingertips were dusty with the ground up graphite from how much he had been sketching.

He poured his heart into the details of your body he loved so much. He swore he could never do justice, his drawings were nothing more than chicken scratch compared to the real thing.

Little did he know the real thing hadn’t actually gone to sleep in their own bed in their own tent, just waiting for everyone to finally fuck off to bed before they slipped out into the night as stepped lively to his own.

He chewed at the inside of his cheek in concentration. He had to get it all right: The way your body could move, the way you saunter around with those delish wide hips that tempt him every day, the way your soft belly curves, your thighs that could make him cry, your soft and round cheeks he loved to press kisses to. He loved how your naked body looked, he wished he could hold it forever until time would stop. He sketched your stretchmarks that would find himself tracing, your nipples pebbled when he would kiss at your chest, your hands grabbing at your ample body. He drew your legs apart this time, normally sketching them closed, as he tried to pay attention to the detail of your sex when he heard something that made him snap his journal closed in an instant.

His eyes shot up to his tent where he heard you clear your throat softly.

“Arthur?” you cooed softly at him. Just your voice alone sent warm vibrations down to his core. “You mind a lil’ company tonight?”

You parted the opening of his tent and stepped through, a perfect sight to really ignite the fire in him. A devious smile spread across your face at just the sight of Arthur’s pupils blown wide with a feral need.

“Darlin’, the day I say no to that is the day ya put me in the ground.”

[captainnameless]

oh I’m in tears I’m sobbing I’m throwing up OVER MAMA SEB AND DANIEL. I love how seb and uncle lew just became one idk if that’s intended but in my head they’re co parenting. I am begging (if you’re up for it of courseeee!!!) for mama seb, Lewis and Danny. Unfortunately I have yet to recover from Singapore gp seeing DR like that so I need this like I need my meds 💔

aw! they’re such a treat to write, and i don’t mind the seb + lewis coparenting canon bc i love writing them two. so let’s crank up the coparenting in this one.

It’s an adorable sight, Daniel curled up under a blanket, face smushed into the soft carpet, surrounded by the abandoned toy cars he was playing with.

They may have slightly misjudged how tired the younger would be after his flight, growing suspicious when silence filled Lewis’ Monaco home, something that rarely happened when Daniel was there, and finding said Australian passed out.

Lewis had insisted they moved Daniel to the bedroom, or at least the couch, complaining about his back but Sebastian had shushed him, refusing to move the younger at risk of waking him and not getting him back down, arguing that a floor nap wouldn’t kill him.

Daniel wakes up while Lewis is out walking Roscoe, shows up at the edge of the couch, curls are over the place, eyes barely open.

“Daddy.”

Sebastian puts the book down he was reading, a soft smile on his face. “Uh oh, gotta rub the sleep out of your eyes, bubba. I’m not Daddy.”

A groany little whine leaves Daniel’s body, face scrunchy. “Mama,” Daniel starts. “Where Daddy?”

“Walking Roscoe, sweetheart. Which means Mama gets all the cuddles.”

The soft pout on Daniel’s face appears only for a little bit, apparently having an opinion on not being taken on the walk but forgotten quickly at the invitation to a cuddle, clambering into Sebastian’s lap with a soft little sigh.

“Good nap?” Sebastian asks, wrapping Daniel up and pressing a kiss into the messy curls.

“Mhmm,” Daniel hums, a soft yawn leaving his mouth, slowly waking up more cuddled into Seb.

Daniel’s just getting a bit squirmy when Lewis comes back home, entirely offended by Sebastian stealing all the cuddles.

“He’s a cuddle thief,” Lewis accuses when Daniel squirms out of Lewis’ hold after only a minute. “Stole them all so Daddy only gets one?”

Sebastian’s stupid little smug smile definitely doesn’t help, it pulls a giggle out of Daniel.

“Two!” Daniel says, wrapping his arms around Lewis for another quick second before he’s darting off, energy restored.

“Well bye?!” Lewis calls after him, gets a little wave in return as Daniel goes off to do God knows what.

“I hate you.” Lewis says, but is unable to keep the glare in his eyes as he looks at Seb.

“Lying will earn you a time out,” Sebastian hums, successfully dodging a pillow being thrown at him. “He asked for Daddy first thing when he woke up, if that makes you feel any better.”

Lewis smiles. “It does.”

[mytheoristavenue]

Day 5-

OP Tony Tony Chopper x Platonic!Reader - Gingerbread House

Summary: You help Chopper put together a gingerbread house after everyone else goes to bed.

Warnings: Pure fluff, very short, platonic relationship

You stirred in bed to the sounds of rustling elsewhere in the ship. You were ever the light sleeper, and tended to wait until everyone else was sound asleep before laying down yourself to ensure a good rest. Not tonight though, aparently.

Tiptoeing down the hall, you noticed the lounge light on. Who could be up at this hour? Rounding the corner, your curious scowl faded into a warm smile. There was the Straw Hat doctor, sitting in one of the dining chairs, boosted by a stack of books, and leaning over the table, a frustrated grimace on his face. He had something caked in his fur and smudged on his nose, and from the crumbled bits of cookie architecture in from of him, you guessed it to be royal icing.

"Chopper," you called out, giggling and stepping toward him. "What are you doing up so late?"

His eyes darted to you, startled, and then even more panicked. "G-Go away! You're not supposed to see! It's a suprise!"

"Are you making a gingerbread house?" you asked, ignoring his distress. "Do you need any help?"

The boy shrunk in his seat, surely blushing under all that fur, and nodded slightly. "I just...I wanted to surprise everyone with a gingerbread house, but I misjudged how hard it'd be to put it together...especially with hooves." You couldn't help but let out a hearty laugh, which only frustrated him further. "Oh, shut up, (Y/N)! That's it, just for that, you can't have any when it's done! Not a single gumdrop!"

"Oh, stop," you snickered, sitting down with him. "Let me help you. What are you stuck on?"

"Well..." he trailed, eyeing you suspiciously. "I can't get the pieces to hold together, and if I put too much pressure on them, my hooves break them." He explained, shoulders slumping, disheartened.

"Tell you what," you smiled. "How about I hold them together, and you put the icing on the seems? That way you can move on and don't have to worry about it falling apart while you do something else."

The boy thought for a moment before nodding excitedly. "Yeah, okay!"

With that, the building stage was done before either of you knew it, and Chopper was already halfway finished decorating the 'front yard' of the house. The cake board was dotted with bits of icing with gummy trees stuck in them, gluing them down, and the pathway to the door was lined with candy pearls. Now that your hands were out of the way, Chopper was free to decorate the roof, which he'd been incessantly telling you how excited he was to do. Yet, when the time came, he hesitated.

"Chopper, what's the matter?" you asked with a curious smile.

"I feel guilty," he confessed. "You've been so helpful and I was such a brat to you earlier. Now I'm getting to do all the fun parts while you do the hard work." Your gaze softened at his deep consciousness.

"Well, that's alright, buddy." you chirped, booping his nose. "I knew what I was signing up for."

"But..." he mumbled, shrinking into himself again. "I want you to do some fun parts too." Suddenly, he perked up, shoving the messy piping back into your hands. "I know, I know!" He beamed. "How about you do the icing, and I'll do the candy! Deal?"

Your heart began to sweel with admiration for the little guy. He could be so selfless, so sweet. "That's a deal, Doc."

[strawberryfiction]

Stayed A Summer Memory

Even in the dead of night warm wind raced off the water blowing across the docks. Summer was right behind the gusts bringing the annual surge of sight seers and summer workers with it. Taking a deep breath Sanji let the warm air clear the cigarette sting from his lungs. Last summer was the best and worst summer of his life. He took a drag of his cigarette sitting against the large metal fixture used for mooring. The cool touch of the metal seeped through his pants causing goosebumps to ripple across his skin. Sanji spent last summer planted in that spot watching the waves and the stars. He took another drag of his cigarette.

“Sanji! What are you doing out here?” A voice called out angrily.

Sanji smiled waving, “Usopp, you on the night shift?” he called back into the night.

“Dude it’s like four in the morning- again- what are you doing here?” Usopp pressed arms crossed tight across his chest.

Sanji dropped his cigarette onto the concrete, “Summer is right around the corner.” He smashed his sneaker against the cigarette butt, “Do you think he’ll come back?”

Usopp was silent and Sanji almost laughed. The man was never silent he must have stumped him-or scared him. It was a horrifying question.

“Are you hoping he comes back?” Usopp asked in a voice so quiet Sanji was certain it was not the man’s own.

Sanji pushed himself up from the moor. As he stood, he looked back out to the calm rolling sea that would soon be filled with sails from around the world. He could almost make out a small white sailboat peeking out over the horizon. The question felt like holding a lit firework and watching the fuse crawl.

Last summer Sanji felt like he was glowing. As if the sun chose to revolve around him, but eventually the warm glow became too hot. Before the cold came in and the harbor cleared out Sanji was burning.

Laughing Sanji lit another cigarette, “I don’t know. Maybe.” He shrugged, “But also maybe I hope he sank.” After the words entered the universe Sanji wished he could take his darker feelings back.

“I’ll let you know what I see,” Usopp offered, “You should get some sleep.”

Sanji sighed, “Appreciate it Usopp. The old man will kill me if I miss a shift anyway.”

Stuffing his hands into his jean pockets, Sanji let the cigarette hand from his lips as he walked down the street. The small vessel could have sunk for all he knew. After all, the day when Roronoa Zoro pulled into the harbor Sanji watched the man misjudge his space and scrape the hall of his small boat against the concrete siding. They spent all summer patching it up. Mostly Sanji with help from Usopp and Zeff.

Crawling into bed Sanji knew sleep wouldn’t find him. Not now that his mind was wandering to last summer. It always started like the flicker of a lighter low on butane. The smell of cheap beer, shouting in the distance, or the thud of boots. It sent a shock to Sanji’s system as if his mind was just waiting to mule over every detail of the prior summer. As if he could see where it went wrong, as if he could still change it. A pit opened in Sanji’s stomach every time and it swallowed his soft heart. He turned to his side and couldn’t stop the silent tears that rolled along his cheeks leaving a dark stain on the pillow.

He'd become a pro at crying over Roronoa Zoro. It almost felt as easy as breathing.

Waking up to a blaring alarm, Sanji sighed. Feeling around Sanji felt his phone tangled in the sheets. He’d fallen asleep with it in his hands. Squinting he looked at the screen, as expected it was 10am. The perks to the job were no morning shifts, just late nights.

Hauling himself out of bed Sanji opened the shutters letting the morning sun light his room. He yawned even with the bright light assaulting his grey eyes. He ran his hand through his messy blonde hair before stretching. The lack of sleep was going to make the day long, the anticipation was going to make it worse.

Another perk Sanji had was living above the pizzeria he worked for. It allowed him extra time to let his brain fog dissipate before working. Lighting a cigarette Sanji took full advantage of the situation draping himself across a grey quilted lounge chair. He scrolled through Instagram while letting his cigarette sit between his teeth.

Inhaling sharply Sanji coughed choking on the smoke that snaked down the wrong pipe. Pulling the cigarette from his mouth Sanji coughed quickly putting it out in a blue crystal ashtray on a small table next to his chair. His lungs burned and tears formed in the corners of his eyes. His chest felt like he’d swallowed coals, and they settleed in his heart weighing it down. Tossing his phone on the bed Sanji yanked his work shirt from his closet. His fingers slipped every button through their loops. He straightened his stance, eyeing himself in the full-length mirror leaning against the wall adjacent to his wardrobe. Rolling up the sleeves of his striped blue and white shirt Sanji thought he hid his rage well underneath.

Picking his phone up again Sanji hesitating staring at his own reflection in the dark screen. Huffing Sanji punched in his passcode revealing the same Instagram post mocking him. Gritting his teeth Sanji kicked himself for not just blocking the green haired bastard. It would have saved him some headaches.

The photo was on Zoro’s account, but Zoro never posted himself on the account for anyone to know it. Yet, there he stood frozen in a halfhearted smile mid conversation on the deck of his small boat. His hand was cupped above his forehead attempting to block the sun from his eyes. They were as dazzling as Sanji remembered a kaleidoscope of honey golds that glittered every time he smiled. In the sun it made Sanji speechless. Raking his eyes across the photo the photographer was a stranger to Sanji. He didn’t look like anyone Zoro had mentioned before either. Not that Zoro talked much about his life back where he came from. Did Sanji even remember where Zoro lived? The odd man in the photo had black hair and dark brown eyes, there was a small scar under the mans left eye Sanji could hardly make out. The man’s skin was tanned, and he wore a straw hat with a red ribbon around the middle of the hat.

Who was he to Zoro? A new boyfriend?

The captain underneath read All Blue bound. Zoro was returning for the summer. Based on the posted date he was probably halfway there . Marching into the kitchen Sanji yanked open the fridge deep blue eyes scanning for plausible breakfast options. He considered starting his day with just toast with jelly but knew Zeff would give him hell for not starting the day right. Sanji rolled his eyes, the last thing he needed was a lecture on the proper fuel for his body first thing in the morning.

“Sanji!” Zeff’s voice boomed from outside.

It was like the man had a sixth sense.

Throwing open the window Sanji was hit with a gust of warm air, “What is it old man?”

Hanging his torso out the window looking down into the alleyway an older man stood hands on his hips and mouth down turned. It was rarely ever a smile.

Looking up Zeff held his large white chef hat to his head, “Get a move on! We have a big day ahead!” the old man’s dirty blonde mustache twitched as he spoke.

“You think everyday is a big day!” Sanji shouted in return.

“If you’re late it’ll set a bad example for the new hire!” Zeff shouted.

Sanji frowned, “New hire?” his boss neglected to tell him about that.

Zeff shook his head huffing as he stomped in the backdoor. Sanji groaned, his eyes practically rolling back in his head. He may not have been the best listener when it came to Zeff, but Sanji knew his ears would perk up at new hire. He probably would have vetoed it. Sanji ran the small kitchen perfectly fine with the help he had-Zeff and Patty. He never felt overwhelmed by a hectic night of on stop orders, especially in the summer. He reveled in the challenge enjoying the thrill of putting the finishing touches on a large group order. It filled him with triumph to watch it go out into the dining room. If they hired another person, work would become less of a challenge.

Stepping onto the metal fire escape that doubled as his front porch Sanji soaked in the warmth of the afternoon sun as he lit a cigarette. With each step down the stairs, he took a drag and thought of a different reason why the new person should be fired. It would be easy; they were most likely a summer hire Zeff would tire of quickly when he saw no potential in paying temporary assistance. Sanji just had to help the realization process along.

Swinging open the same back door Zeff had disappeared through the moment prior Sanji entered the restaurant.

It already smelled like sweet marinara sauce and rising dough. Sanji always felt slightly guilty for missing morning prep, but he made up for it by mopping after all the customers went home relieving Zeff and Patty as he closed.

“Morning,” Patty spoke up while kneading dough.

“Morning,” Sanji crammed his cigarette into the crystal ash tray he kept by the back door, “Did you get a look at our new employee yet?”

Patty was a tall muscular man with dark skin, a dark well-trimmed beard, and blue curly hair he always kept short. He wore a white headband tied around his forehead. On his left arm he sported two red heart tattoos on his upper arm. One of the cooks’ favorite pass times was showing the tattoos while flexing with a heavy take-out order.

Patty shook his head, “Not yet.”

Sanji clicked his tongue, “Geez than I was called down early for nothing.”

Sanji jolted forward as a stinging erupted over the back of his head. Turning, he saw Zeff standing with a rolled-up newspaper casually tapping it into his adjacent palm.

“Don’t be sour.” Zeff warned sternly.

“I give them a week tops,” Sanji ran his fingers through his short thick blonde hair evening it out after the assault, “Once they realize they’d rather be out enjoying the summer sun and most likely their vacation they’ll be gone.”

“Or you’ll drive them out,” Patty snarked.

Sanji kept his lips sealed he knew Patty felt the same way about summer hires. They weren’t hurting for help. The chime of the classic bell above the door broke the conversation and all heads turned towards their first early customer of the day. A girl with orange hair held back by a thick black clip walked in curious light hazel eyes scanned the empty booths and tables. Sanji smoothed out his shirt and grinned.

“Good morning miss,” Sanji spoke as casually as if he were greeting an old friend, “Please excuse us we’re still preparing for guests and there might be a small wait. Feel free to take a seat and I’ll bring a drink and menu right out.”

“Oh, thank you but,” The girl started in a timid tone.

Before she finished Sanji gently lifted her hand leading her to a booth, “Don’t be shy this one has the best view of our famous pizza being made right behind the counter there!” He beamed.

The girl frowned snatching her hand back, “Right, thank you.”

Bounding back behind the counter Sanji prepped a glass with ice water and picked a clean menu off a stack. Before he could walk back out into the dining area Zeff was walking past Sanji. Watching the old man Sanji assumed he was retrieving the mail form the PO box across the street. Instead, he was shocked to watch the head chef pause at the young patron’s table.

Scrambling out from behind the counter Sanji returned to the booth forgetting about the water. He heard Patty’s footsteps behind him.

“Hey, where’s my drink?” The girl pouted crossing her arms.

“Welcome your new summer co-worker,” Zeff gestured towards the girl in the booth with his hand out as if he was presenting her.

Sliding herself free from the booth the girl stood waving, “I’m Nami, and if you keep treating me as lovely as you did when I walked in, I know we’ll work together just fine.”

“Nami is going to handle deliveries,” Zeff continued.

Sanji was taken a back it was a shock to his system. Zeff hiring a woman for his kitchen was unheard of. However, it sounded like she wasn’t going to be handling food, just deliveries. It meant the kitchen dynamic was saved and left Sanji conflicted. Nami was cute, he could work with a cute co-worker. He frowned and she also came off as a handful.

“Welcome to the crew,” Sanji found himself saying it to her again easily, “I’ll grab that water, why don’t you sit at the countertop?”

“You took that better than I’ve ever seen you for a new hire,” Patty chuckled rolling out dough, “Usually you scowl or growl. Leave it to a cute girl to change your mind.”

Nami took a seat resting her brown shoulder bag on the countertop.

Sanji placed the cool glass in front of his new co-worker, “You’re a new summer face. What brings you into town?”

“Vacation,” Nami batted her brown eyes at Sanji.

Sanji raised a brow, “And you’re going to work during your vacation?”

“Maybe I didn’t do a great job at budgeting,” Nami pouted avoiding Sanji’s gaze. She took the glass sipping from it.

“Shame,” Sanji leaned on the countertop.

“My girlfriend has an expensive hobby,” Nami shrugged, “And I can’t say no to her.”

Sanji’s ears perked up, “Girlfriend?”

Nami’s eyes darkened, “Yea, got a problem with that?”

Sanji shook his head, “I think you picked a good place to work,” his mind wandered to Zoro.

Sanji thought about the first time his heart fluttered upon seeing Zoro shirtless and cursing about his boat while sweating in the hot summer sun. Sanji’s heart had beat a little faster around men before, but it hadn’t beat from his chest until he met Zoro. Sanji had never been nervous about holding hands stronger than his own or kissing chapped lips that bit his skin too hard. A man had never lit his skin on fire the way Zoro had, and it was terrifying at first to admit it.

Nami leaned across the counter, “Oh, so you tried to charm me but there’s a boyfriend in the mix?” she smiled coyly.

“No,” Sanji said flatly.

Nami frowned, falling back into her seat.

Sanji turned busying himself with prepping the stone pizza oven.

“What’s the expensive hobby?” Patty took over the conversation while Sanji listened.

“Wind surfing,” Nami answered.

“So, I’m guessing you’re here for the competition?” Patty asked.

Nami hummed in agreement, “This is actually our first time on All Blue Island.”

“Well, you’ll have plenty of time to explore,” Patty assured her, “I can give you the names of the best local beaches.”

“Vivi would love that for practice,” Nami sounded like she was beaming.

“What competition?” Sanji turned back around butting in.

“You’re kidding,” Nami said flatly, “Don’t you live here, there are posters everywhere.”

Sanji rolled his eyes leaning on the rep counter, “There are always posters and events especially before summer. I can’t pay attention to them all.”

“You should pay attention to some,” Patty chided him, “You never go out anymore. Last summer I could barely find you for shifts.”

Sanji balled his hands into fists, “Would you shut up! Who does anything in a beach town during winter!” He shouted.

“I’ve done tons of stuff,” Patty shouted back, “If you used your brain, you’d find something!”

“You can find me out back!” Sanji stomped his foot.

“Is that a challenge?” Patty raised a fist towards Sanji.

“Cut it out!” Zeff slammed the rolled newspaper back across Sanji’s head before smacking Patty, “It hadn’t even been thirty minutes and you’re going to scare off our new employee,” Zeff put keys on the counter, “Here are the keys to the delivery moped out front.”

Nami took the keys and slid them into her bag.

“Sanji you better have your head on straight this summer,” Zeff spoke gruffly fixing his sandy colored mustache, “We’re catering the wind surfing competition and I need all hands-on deck.”

“Yes sir,” Sanji nodded.

Spooning marinara sauce over pizza dough the afternoon had steadily picked up to a normal pace. The summer rush hadn’t started yet, but Sanji was sure boats would start docking at port any day in large numbers. Slicing fresh pepperoni Sanji couldn’t stop thinking about what Patty had said.

At the time Sanji didn’t think it was that noticeable. Sure, he’d missed a shift or two sitting by the dock, and maybe he didn’t finish cleaning all the dishes when closing. It just felt like there were more than usual. He didn’t think anyone would notice a few lazy days from him. A few days of dropping the ball and rotting in his sheets. He didn’t think anyone had noticed the way he closed the door to his flat with no intention of leaving. How he spent the chilly winter nights looking at photos he wished he could erase. How he feared his tears would freeze to his face by morning. He didn’t want to keep reliving the same moments repeating the same regrets to Usopp like a broken record. The man had so much to do cleaning ports and preparing them for winter. Sanji did what he thought was the next best thing.

He tried pretending he didn’t exist. He shut out the world, he watched the screen of his phone, and he slept.

Frowning Sanji slid the pizza into the hot brick oven. Maybe it was noticeable, he always had something going on. An event or chores anything to keep him out of the house and busy when he wasn’t working or dabbling in his own personal cooking. Suddenly he was a shut in.

Boxing up a pizza Sanji stuck the ticket with the address on top, “Nami, three pizzas ready to go!”

Nami stood from the booth she was waiting in and set a glass on the counter. She took the sticker off the top pizza box before shuffling the hot pizzas into a delivery bag.

“Be back in a bit,” Nami said while looking over the tag.

The first day with Nami as their new delivery driver was nearly at its end as the sun started to dip to the ground. Sanji thought she did a good job; she was able to keep up. Sanji pulled up the online orders noting the last few pizzas. He cast his gaze out to the few remaining patrons seeing if there was anyone that needed assistance.

The familiar bell rang over the door.

Usopp waved as he walked into the pizzeria.

Sanji waved back, “Can I help you, or do you need more time?” he smirked.

Usopp mockingly tapped his chin disrupting the stubble across it, “How about you start me off with a soda. I’ll need a few moments.”

Sanji picked up a cup, “Very bold of you sir considering you came in so close to closing.”

Usopp shrugged, “I’m a busy man and you still look open.”

Setting the cup on the pale tan granite countertop Sanji looked at a table sitting and chatting metal tray cleared on the tabletop between them.

“Take your time sir,” Sanji smirked as he printed out the check for the table.

While trading the tray for the check Sanji heard the pitter of the moped’s motor.

“Ready to meet the newest member of the Baratie Slice?” Sanji said while walking behind the counter.

“Man, Sanji think you can cut the poor guy a break?” Usopp stirred his soda with his straw, “Or at least send them down to the dock if they’re looking for work. Franky was experimenting with new mooring lines and three have already snapped. It’s a good thing he only tests with our boats and not guest boats. Plus, I don’t know where he gets those ideas our mooring lines are perfectly fine!”

“I would take all of that into consideration Usopp,” Sanji put his pointer finger up, “If it was a guy.”

Without a moment of hesitation Usopp swiveled on his red bar stool. He got a glimpse of Nami walking into the restaurant with a hideous red helmet and googles in hand as she approached the counter. At some point she’d let her fiery orange hair down. Usopp turned back just as swiftly eyes wide and mouth agape.

Sanji leaned on the counter, “I’m also guessing Franky wanting to change the mooring lines has to do with Zoro,” the name slipped from his lips more dreamily than he meant it to. “After all he somehow managed to break one while docking.”

Usopp doesn’t respond sipping his soda. The only sound is the bubbles fizzing in the cup. His dark eyes flit from looking down into the soda up to Sanji.

Sanji forces a wobbly smile; he’s not sure if he’s trying to convince himself or Usopp that it was finally okay to talk about. That surely a year was enough time to let the heartbreak heal It had to be, a year was so long. Sanji refused to believe he was damaged that badly by one man he knew for four months.

Nami sat heavily on the stool one away from Usopp. She placed her helmet and goggles on the counter.

“How was your first day?” Sanji perked up.

“Not too bad,” Nami shrugged, “Everyone gave a generous tip.”

With her cheshire cat grin Sanji believed Nami made out like a bandit.

“What can I get you to drink to celebrate your first day?” Sanji asked.

Nami hummed, “I’m thinking beer?”

“Oh, grab one for me too!” Usopp chimed in raising his hand.

Sanji was placing plates and silverware into the dishwasher, “You should be deciding what you want for dinner. When those logs burn out, I’m not adding more to the oven.”

Walking to the back room of the small restaurant Sanji opened a standing cooler pulling three cold beers out. He stared at the green tinted bottles; it had been a long time since he sat at the bar down the street after a long shift. His company was ever changing, Usopp, Patty, even Zeff. Until one day it was always the same flushed face with a broad smile laughing as Sanji yielding from another drinking contest. Zoro was always turning things into a competition and Sanji couldn’t help his competitive nature being drawn into every one of his challenges. The memories were so vivid, but so hazy. Tinted with a filter of rose-colored alcohol. Biting his lip Sanji swore he could taste the bitter beer pressed against his lips in a sloppy kiss he thought would never end. He clung to Zoro like a life raft as they stumbled down the street.

Sanji’s eyes narrowed as he turned to walk back out into the empty restaurant. Even having a beer was tainted with his memory. Zoro had crawled under Sanji’s skin and cracked open his rib cage to hallow out his heart. Now the space was vacant, and Sanji felt the pain he was blind to.

Setting the beers on the counter Sanji used a bottle open with a flourish making a show of the opening.

Usopp clapped, “One Hawaiian and one cheese pizza please good sir!”

Sanji nodded, “Order taken. Nami do those sound good to you?”

“I’m the one who wants the Hawaiian” Nami raised her hand sheepishly.

“A classic summer choice,” Sanji praised.

With pizza cooking in the oven Sanji wiped the flour from his face, ringing out the last customers thanking them as he followed the party of two to the front door. He felt relieved as he flipped the open sign to close and locked the door. Flipping the front house lights the restaurant became dark only the prep station and bar top remained illuminated under warm diffused lights. Nami smiled laughing at a story Usopp was telling. Sanji was certain it was mostly likely one he’d heard before.

Fresh from the oven the aroma of sweet tomato sauce, crisp pineapple, and soft cheese had Sanji’s mouth watering. He made the pizzas large knowing his stomach would beg for a piece. He was shocked after years he’d never tired of a fresh slice of pizza.

The duo in front of Sanji were silent for the first time that night as they ate.

“I think we should go to the bar this weekend,” Sanji said before crunching on a piece of crust.

Usopp’s eyebrows shot up he looked unconvinced, “You’re positive?”

Sanji nodded, “Why not, it’s been too long” He beamed, “And we have the first weekend of summer to celebrate before it gets too crowded with vacationers. Especially with this tournament going on.” “Can Vivi come?” Nami asked.

Sanji nodded, “I wouldn’t have it any other way. I’d love to meet her.” He took a swig of beer.

[katnisspeetaprim]

I'm In Part 2

Bang Chan/Fem!Reader/Felix

So this is the part 2 of I'm In. Quite a few people asked for this so I hope it lives up to the hype! This is the frst ever threesome smut I've written so I'm sorry if it's not that great!

Warnings: Established relationship, piv sex, unprotected sex, idol!au, swearing, pwp, oral (m recieving)

Word Count: 3157 M.list

Never in your life had you spent so much time cleaning your apartment and choosing your outfit. Not even when Chan came round for the first time. Deep down you knew you were over thinking things. Felix wouldn’t give a damn if your place was messy, considering what it was that he was coming round to discuss with you and Chan.

‘Babe calm down! You’ve been jittery all day.’

‘I know! But I want to make a good impression.’ You turned away from Chan and reorganised the fruit bowel for the 100th time that evening.’

‘what the-? You’ve known each other for years??’ Chan was confused, not understanding why you were acting this way. He came over and spun you round to face him, hand coming to gently stroke your cheek.

‘Baby, if you don’t want this-‘ You abruptly cut him off.

‘No it’ not that. I just want it to go well...’ You sighed and sat down on the sofa, flattening out your dress. You had decided on a simple summer dress, so that if everything went to plan, Felix would have easy access. Chan placed his warm hand on your shoulder and went to speak, when the doorbell suddenly rang.

‘He’s early.’ You chuckled. Chan smiled back and went to let his band mate in.

You stood with a smile when they rounded the corner, pulling Felix into a hug when he approached.

‘Hey Lix, I’m glad you came.’ He affectionately returned your embrace, squeezing lightly as he pulled back.

‘Me too.’ Chan cleared his throat as you pulled apart.

‘so... Shall we get to business?’

The three of you had done as you’d planned, ordered food and alcohol, so you could loosen up whilst discussing your boundaries.

‘So first off, everybody want’s this right?’ Chan lead the conversation. If somebody wasn’t comfortable, there had been lots of time to pull out and so far, nobody had voiced any concerns. You and Felix both nodded at the question, prompting his to continue.

‘Cool. Do either of you have any boundaries? Things you aren’t comfortable with?’ You and Felix shyly glanced at each other.

‘I don’t think so?’ Felix said, almost like he was asking a question.

‘Me neither.’ You replied confidently. ‘ Though nothing weird please.’ Both men laughed at your attempt to break the tension.

‘Don’t worry, unless I’ve severally misjudged him, I don’t think Felix is into any weird shit.’ Chan reassured you and Felix nodded with a chuckle.

‘So erm... Do we just start?’ You spoke sheepishly. Chan smirked at your timid attitude.

‘Eager?’ You blushed profusely.

‘Why don’t you start with making out a little? Get a feel for each other.’ Chan suggested, leaning back in his chair and licking his lips subtly. You bit your lip and turned to face Felix, looking at him through the curtain of your hair.

He was staring back, eyes now slightly darker now that this was actually happening. You stood up, maybe a little too quickly, as you tried to act calm and collected.

You made your way across the room, swaying your hips seductively as you went, until you stood directly before Felix, staring down at him.

You placed you hands on his shoulders and suddenly straddled his waist, already feeling the beginning of a boner from him as you settled.  You licked your lips as you saw the ghost of a smile tugging at the corner of his mouth.

Leaning down, you finally connected your lips to his, both sighing contently as your mouths moulded together. Your heart was beating rapidly in your chest, so hard you were surprised it couldn’t be heard by the two men in the room.  You felt Felix’ hands come to rest on your hips, squeezing as he relaxed into the kiss. Feeling a little braver, you laced your fingers through his hair and probed his mouth with your tongue.  His hair had been recently dyed for the new comeback, and you would be lying if you said he didn’t look good with the blue hair...

‘Why don’t you touch her more?’ Chan’s voice broke through the air. Felix broke the kiss to look over to the older man, before slowly bringing his gaze back to you, silently asking fro permission. You nodded with a smile and brought him back in to kiss. His hands slowly began to trail up your body, shivers running down your spine as his fingers glided over your clothed skin, until he reached your breasts. You let out a gasp when he squeezed, kneading them with his fingers.

‘You’re soft.’ Felix breathed out. He’d clearly gotten more daring, as he pulled your dress down, revealing the top of your breasts, so he could suckle on the exposed skin.

You leaned your head back, unconsciously grinding down onto Felix, causing him to moan against your skin.

You parted your eyes slightly, chancing a glance at the man sat only a few feet from you. Chan sat at the edge of his seat, leaning forwards on his thighs.

His intense gaze was laser focused on Felix’ mouth attached to your chest. You craved for a bigger reaction from your boyfriend, so you decided to move things forwards.

You abruptly stood, causing Felix to look up at you with wide eyes, thinking he’d done something wrong. You only smirked as you looked over your shoulder to Chan. His eyes now bore into you, waiting for your next move.

You reached up to the straps of your dress and teasingly pushed the material down your body. You had to admit, you did feel a little embarrassed when your naked breasts came on display, having foregone a bra. You almost lost confidence in your little plan, ready to cover up, when you heard Felix mutter out a quiet ‘fuck’ under his breath. Dark eyes stared up at you as he started breathing heavier.

‘I knew you were eager baby.’ Chan smirked, making you blush. You looked over to see him lazily palming himself through his jeans. Felix took this opportunity to stand and pull his t-shirt over his head. He lunged forwards and took you in his arms, smashing his lips against yours.

His hands began to wonder, harshly gripping your bum, making you hiss out. You reached out and began palming him through his trousers. Felix broke the kiss and rested his head on your shoulder.

‘You’re still wearing too many clothes.’ You whispered in his ear as you undid his zip and roughly pushed his trousers and boxers down. Immediately, you took him in your hand.

‘Ah...’ He couldn’t stop the whimpers that already threatened to escape him.

‘Are you gonna let her do all the work?’ Chan breathed out. He’d now also undone his trousers and slid his hand inside.

Felix laughed lightly, before moving his hand round your body, and slipping it down the front of your panties. You whined out when his fingers teased your folds.

Your eyes were closed as you clung to Felix, until you felt a presence touch you from behind.

Your eyes shot open and craned your neck back to see Chan. He’d also stripped his clothes, letting his hot skin sit against yours and feeling his hard member poking at your backside.

‘I thought you just wanted to watch?’ You breathed as Chan nibbled at your neck. He only snorted against your skin. You giggled, taking this as your cue to carry on.

Felix bought his lips back to yours as you jerked him off.  Felix’ slender fingers rubbed at your clit softly, almost too softly... When you felt Chan’s fingers sliding under your panties from behind and started stroking the folds near your entrance.

You gasped out and clung tightly to Felix, when Chan’s fingers pushed into you.

‘don’t stop.’ Felix whined out when your hand stilled on his dick. Chan growled behind you, almost protectively.

‘She goes first.’ Felix grumbled but continued rubbing at your sensitive bud. He leaned down and started licking at your neck, your head leaning back to lean on Chan’s shoulder as you sighed out.

Chan’s free hand gently turned your face so he could kiss you. You’re heart was still beating loudly in your chest. No matter how confident you thought you were, the whole situation was intense. You’d never even been naked in front of someone you weren’t dating, and now you were being fingered by not only your boyfriend, but also one of his closest friends.

Your mouth hung open as your small gasps turned into breathy moans.

‘You close baby?’ Chan whispered in your ear. Felix hunched over and took your nipple in his mouth, all while pressing harder on your clit.

‘Ah! I’m cumming!’ You moaned out loudly, causing both men to speed up their movements. The sudden explosion between your legs was enough to make your knees buckle. If it weren’t for Felix in front of you, you would be on the floor.

You hunched forwards and wrapped your arms tightly round Felix’ neck as you caught your breath, whining slightly when Chan pulled his fingers out of you.

‘Fuck. That was so sexy. You’re so lucky you get to see that everyday.’ Chan smirked at Felix’ words, but decided to stay silent. He kissed your neck as he peeled himself away from you, helping you to disregard your soaked underwear.

‘You ready to continue baby?’ You nodded with a smile, turning to face him.

‘how do you want me?’  You smirked, beginning to stroke his member.

‘Shit, here.’ He threw down a pillow on the floor, so you wouldn’t hurt your knees. Always the gentleman.

‘You ready to fuck her Felix?’ You were now on all fours in front of him, legs spread and presenting your glistening centre to him. Felix’ eyes widened when he saw you take Chan fully into your mouth, right down to his pubic bone.

‘Fuck yes!’ Felix quickly nestled himself behind you, grasping tightly to your hips. He began to stroke his member across your folds, when he suddenly froze.

‘Do I need a condom?’ he asked, almost timidly, causing Chan to let out a breathy laugh as you sucked on his cock.

‘What do you say baby? Can he go in raw? As a special treat?’ You popped off Chan and flipped your hair to look back to Felix.

‘Just fuck me already.’ That was all Felix needed to hear to position himself back at your entrance, and roughly pushed into you. The sudden unexpected roughness from Felix was enough to make you wince and hiss out.

‘Hey!’ Chan seethed out. ‘Be careful!’

‘Shit, sorry Y/N.’ Felix squeezed your hip gently.

‘It’s ok. Please move.’ You moaned out, turning back to Chan and taking him back into your mouth.

‘My god you’re so tight! Fuck!’ Felix’ movements were fast and sloppy, overwhelmed from the feel of being inside you.

‘When was the last time you did it raw?’ Chan laughed out. Felix couldn’t answer. His eyes clamped shut with sweat running down his face as he tried to stop himself from cumming early.

You moaned around Chan as you felt another orgasm building up.

‘Shit I’m gonna cum!’ Felix moaned out behind you, movements becoming faster and harder as he released himself inside you. Felix was trembling so much and gripping your hips so tightly, you were sure you would have bruises in the shape of his hands tomorrow morning.

He’s hunched over and was basically hugging you from behind as he kissed down your back, making Goosebumps appear on your skin.

Chan pulled out of your mouth as Felix caught his breath.

‘don’t get too comfortable mate.’ Chan scolded playfully, causing Felix to groan as he pulled away from you. He cast his eyes down and saw his seed leaking out of you, sending a new wave of blood to his dick.

‘Shit... That was amazing...’ Felix leaned back against the sofa still on the floor, whilst you flipped yourself over.

‘You don’t have to tell me.’ Chan smirked. Smug bastard.

‘Shut up.’ You slapped his leg as he still stood over you, smirking. Chan kneeled down between your legs and placed his fingers between your sensitive folds, making you suck in a breath as he played with your slickness. His eyes were glued to the mess Felix left behind, and he couldn’t help but push as much cum back inside you as he could, not wanting a single drop to go to waste.

‘Think you can take me too baby?’

‘Fuck yes.’ You lunged forwards and bought him into a rough kiss as he slammed into you. You cast your eyes to the side when Chan pulled away to suck on your neck. You caught sight of Felix sat there, staring. He looked completely fucked out, eyes half closed and mouth hanging open. He was laser focused on you as Chan rocked into you.

You couldn’t help but reach your hand out to stroke across his leg and over his semi hard dick. He closed his eyes and relaxed back against the sofa as you lazily stroked him.

Chan couldn’t help but notice you were paying more attention to Felix that him as he was buried inside you. He felt a pang of jealousy so, he pulled almost all the way out and roughly slammed back into you. At the sudden assault, you gasped out and snapped your head back to face Chan.

‘You’re mine baby. Don’t forget that.’ He growled in your ear, causing you to shudder with desire. Your arms buckled beneath when Chan started playing with your clit, bud going into overdrive as you started cumming again.

‘Chan! Please don’t stop!’

‘Fuck!’ He slammed into you one last time before pulling out and quickly standing up, stroking himself to release all over your breasts.

The room was silent, apart from the heavy breathing of the three of you. You look over towards Felix and noticed his chest was now glistening . You giggled lightly, knowing he’d gotten himself off to you and Chan fucking.

You suddenly felt Chan kneeling next to you, placing gentle kisses along your bare shoulder.

‘You goof baby?’ You smiled and nodded, kissing him gently before he helped you to stand.

Felix shuffled behind you as he also stood. He shifted from one foot to the other as he tried to look smaller, as if he wasn’t sure what to do with himself now that it was over.

You quickly moved to the man and hugged him tightly, not wanting him to feel used or awkward around you now.

You cringed slightly when you remembered you were covered in Chan’s cum, but Felix didn’t seem to care, since he eagerly returned your embrace.

Pulling away, you smiled warmly as you stroked his cheek, before leaning in to kiss him.

‘Ok?’

‘Yeah.’ He confirmed with a toothy smile. Chan cleared his throat slightly.

‘Baby? Why don’t you go shower and we’ll clean up here.’ He cringed, looking down at the various fluids that now covered your living room floor.

‘Me and Felix can just clean up with the sink for now.’ Felix nodded in agreement, already looking for a towel.

‘Ah, are you sure? I feel bad making you do that.’

‘Y/N! It’s fine. We don’t mind being a little smelly for a while.’ Felix laughed, basically pushing you out of the room. You laughed along as you gave in and went to the bathroom.

As you showered, Felix and Chan were scurrying around to clean the room and themselves, before you remerged.

When you rounded the corner, you saw both men sitting on the sofa now fully clothed, looking to be mid conversation. Chan’s eyes lit up when he saw you.

‘Hey! You look cozy in that.’ He chuckled, gesturing to your fluffy robe. You smiled and made your way over, forcing your way in-between them.

‘That’s rude.’ Felix joked as he made room for you. You leaned your head on Chan’s shoulder and he put his arm around you.

‘So... What were you guys talking about?’ Chan and Felix glanced at each other, before shuffling awkwardly.

‘We were thinking..’ Chan spoke up, taking the lead ounce again. ‘That if you are ok with it, we could do this again some time?’ The breath hitched in your throat at his words. Glancing up at Chan and Felix, you could see the glimmer of hope on their faces, though they tried their best to mask it.

‘If you don’t want to then don’t feel like you need to.’ Felix spoke up when you didn’t answer right away.

‘No I’d love to do it again!’ You sat up straight. ‘But maybe we can do it on a bed next time?’ You all laughed and agreed. Even tough Chan had thrown a pillow down for you, you were sure you would still have bruised knees and palms in a few hours.

‘Crap.’ Felix cursed as he fished his phone out of his pocket.’

‘What?’

‘Han’s texting me. I forgot we were supposed to meet up today.’ He let out an exasperated sigh as he forced himself to stand up. ‘I need to go.’

‘Dude, you need to plan better!’ Chan laughed out.

‘I know, I know!’

‘Come on, I’ll show you out.’ Chan stood and patted him on the back. Before following after the older man, he turned to you and leaned down to hug you, which you gladly accepted.

‘I had a good time today Felix. I hope the feeling is mutual?’

‘Definitely.’ He replied with no hesitation. ‘I should go, but I’ll text you.’

‘You better!.’

Later that night, you and Chan were cuddling on the sofa in comfortable silence, as you both watched TV.

‘So... What happened to you just watching today?’  Chan looked down at you in surprise, unsure why you were bringing that up again.’

‘I dunno. I guess I just couldn’t help myself. He was a little tense beside you as he stroked your shoulder. ‘Does it bother you? That I joined in today?’ Chan didn’t want to ask, but you bringing it up had caused his confidence to to waver.

‘No not at all!’ Chan breathed a sigh of relief.’ I only asked since you said you were into watching.’ You explained carefully, not wanting to upset or embarrass your boyfriend.

‘Yeah..’ He trailed off nervously. ‘I guess I got caught up in the moment.’ He chuckled. You smiled and sat up, moving to straddle Chan’s lap. He instinctively grabbed onto your hips. You stroked his face lovingly, and leaned down to kiss him.

‘I love you.’

‘I love you too baby.’ You smiled and leaned down to kiss him softly.

‘so.’ Chan leaned his forehead against yours. ‘Do you think It’s too soon to schedule another date with Felix?’ You burst out laughing and smacked his chest.

‘You’re a horny mess Christopher!’

[newtonsheffield]

I just read the snippet you wrote about Kathony's first in-person meeting in Modern Bruises. Now I'm picturing poor Anthony sitting alone in that restaurant, thinking he had been stood up. (My Gods, girl! The way you can evoke so much emotion with just one line!)

What’s worse for Anthony was that he was waiting outside, his hand right in the bouquet of flowers he’d bought for her. He’d already been fairly sure this was a joke when he’d googled Kate and realised that apparently the whole world knew who Kate Sharma was because of some sort of… advert she’d been in last year. And as the seconds turned into minutes he becomes more and more resigned that Kate wasn’t coming. No one was.

She’d decided not to come after all. That he wasn’t worth saddling herself with a relationship with four children who might need her, two who definitely did. He wasn’t worth the drive, because he couldn’t go to London and meet her right now. He’d barely been able to take tonight off. And he felt stupid for feeling the tiniest bit hopeful that she’d understood, as he stared at the flowers in his hands. He felt stupid. So he finally decided to give up and go and he wished he’d never told Daphne exactly why when he’d asked her to just pop in and make sure Eloise could handle everything.

Until he heard a shout.

“Anthony!”

He could hear footsteps on the pavement behind him, thundering towards him and a desperate shout.

“Anthony, fuck! Please don’t go!”

And when he turns his heart stops, because there she is. Her hair’s a little messy from sprinting after him and she’s a little out of breath and her eyes are wide when she stops in front of him but she’s still the most beautiful thing he’s ever seen.

“I’m so sorry I’m late. I fucking misjudged the traffic, and there was an accident and I left my fucking phone charger in London and i had to check in to the hotel and I just wanted to get here as soon as I could so I didn’t change but I’m so fucking sorry.”

But somehow his voice is even when he responds, calm. “That’s okay, I’m just glad you’re here now.”

“I’m… I’m sorry. I’m usually so much more… together than this I’m just… having one of those days.”

He shook his head, “You’re um… you look beautiful.” He held the flowers out, “Do you want to go in? We should still be able to get something to eat. Kitchen’s not closed yet.”

“Yeah, I’d like that.” She smiled at him, clearly relieved as she took the flowers. “I love your shirt.”

His ears burned, “My sisters helped me pick it out.”

“They’re ladies of taste then.” She held her hand out, and months ago he might have hesitated but he took it, this time, staring at the fact that her fingers threaded so effortlessly through his. “It’s very sweet that you admitted that to me.”

“Should I not have?”

“You definitely should have. I like sweet boys.”