#it doesnt mean he has never been good before
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
bugflies00 · 14 hours ago
Text
i have so many thoughts about the tommy song/video and theyre a jumbled mess. i wouldnt call this an analysis this is just. most of my thoughts surrounding the video and what it shows about tommy
one of the things that stuck out to me (outside of how depressing and just like. is this guy okay) is something that ive always respected tommy for because he's always stuck with it and its his like. fervent conviction in people doing things theyre passionate about. thats always been one of the things he talks about all the time!!!
when AI started appearing he was talking about death of creativity, with the internet he's always talking about how the real tragedy is the algorithm killing people's passion by driving them with views and money, and even when he talks about youtube itself, and nowadays standup, its so full of passion.
and i think thats really important because it would be extremely easy for someone like tommy, who's in the process of maturing his online image from a very loud, immature and PASSIONATE persona, to make fun of it. it would be so easy to do like so many other creators and laugh at how "cringe" it was and make a quick cash/attention grab with a funny clip of him laughing at himself. but he never has. well don't get me wrong he's laughed at himself or old videos but it's always just. good natured taking the piss out of himself, it's never this like. mocking your younger self who was so excited to do what they did only because now its "cringe".
not only is he constantly giving that advice to other people (its been years of him replying, to any kid in his chat or donations asking advice on how to be a creator etc, "just go and do it if you love it!!"), he's coherent with how he applies it to himself. he realised he was making cash grab tiktok react vids and hated it so much he just stopped uploading for a while.
i dont know i just think there's something admirable about being able to still be sincere in a time where everything especially online has to be processed through a layer of irony. and its even funnier because he's more sincere THROUGH the irony i mean he's literally going into standup.
letting yourself create something that "means" something is fucking hard especially when half the internet still sees you as a kid who screams around. except the thing is that kid DID make stuff that mattered and that meant something because he was, in his own words, having fun.
i think thats what the format of the video was about too. i mean i think it was pretty clearly not a song thats meant to be streamed, its not purely music, its also a video because tommy is also first and foremost an editor who went to film college. its also not a "comedy" song like he's made some before, because those were all intentionally created to land as many jokes and make a big buzz— which doesnt mean they were bad! im philza is a contemporary lyrical masterpiece. but they had a specific purpose and it was to make people laugh and i think this video was completely like. opposite of what peoples expectations are of tommy. the "wow hes not a child anymore hes being mature🤓" reactions are the most obvious aspect of this (which, like, its been a while, get with the program).
i think the point of this was to make something that genuinely meant something but that was also like. as unpalatable to the algorithm and to the TommyInnit Viewer as possible. even now that he's gone into making quieter, more reflective videos, we've never had the flashing texts and the projector images and just all of that. hes always talking about how he hates the way the "youtube formula" has dictated the course of content and stolen all creativity for youtubers. its not meant to be a YouTube Video tm. its just meant to mean something to someone, and obviously process some sort of personal emotions, and i just think thats. yeah. yeah
i mean he even says so outright. "this needless, self indulgent spiral of self gratification" is pretty damn explicit. its not meant to be funny content its really a cry for help or for just. anything at all really
Tumblr media
it was also a lot about perception, yknow the "entertainer" dilemma, "its all attention porn"... theres a layer of this point thats universal, everyone struggles with how they're perceived and i think any "artist" or "entertainer" figure can see themselves in it, but there's also a layer thats completely impermeable to most of us because it touches upon the sheer absurdity of a "youtuber". especially one of tommy's popularity. especially one who blew up so so fast so young. i honestly think its IMPOSSIBLE to process that. its about the ethics of having millions of people's time so readily available to you if you just press the right buttons to make the algorithm happy and then you've got them. im like 75% sure i remember him saying this on stream once, something like "your time is valuable" and if a fan didnt value him as an entertainer they should drop him.
Tumblr media Tumblr media
and even here^ thats the saddest "lmao" ive seen in my life SORRY LOL but its really just. yeah im not gonna repeat myself it speaks for itself. perception and internet expectations and all that
one of the other images that stuck out to me was also this:
Tumblr media
"yeah i know its too much like bo burnham but it wont be in a year though. in a year it will be like tom simons. just let me figure out what that means, ok?"
a lot of the video is about. influences and inspirations. the bo burnham references are so obvious he's poking at them, but i think he's raising a good point about the creativity that he's constantly praising. its never something that springs up on its own, its all about looking at others work and making it your own and feeding yourself with all those experiences and slowly, surely building your own way of doing things (tommyinnit "minecraft talent show" and "a tribute to dream smp" serial quackity + schlatt impersonator would know all about that) ->
Tumblr media
and its daunting! its fucking scary to move away from that! which is also the main vibe i got from the video which, outside of his own issues with how he's perceived online, was the sort of existential dread that comes with actually creating. its one thing to preach you need to be passionate and create, its another to sit down and create something thats BY you. its a part of growing up! and we're literally seeing him do it live (well the bits that he chooses to show obviously)! thats also part of why i think tommy's so relatable to so many people is that he's so like. honest and real about what it's like to grow up, simple as that, and growing into yourself.
"this was everything to me" and using the picture of his younger self... man. theres obviously so much sadness underlying the whole thing but i think the nostalgia and melancholy in mourning being someone who was only inspired/excited by your interests and role models is universal. and obviously for tommy a lot of those influences turned out. well i think it was pretty damn clear who/what he was referring to here. ->
Tumblr media
i don't think i need to go too in detail about that, especially cause a lot of the video was clearly a way to process his own personal emotions. especially with those next few images. i just hope he's okay and that god doubles his pain and gives it to mr beast to quote my friend bronzetomatoes. man.
Tumblr media Tumblr media
of course he had to end with a funny clip about a hot anime girl and i think that kinda. sums it all up in a way. if that makes sense. at the end of the day its about the fact that he has to use humour to make the thing work when its out in the open, even when he tries not to and to be actually honest, but theres also the fact that hes literally a comedian and creating something "honest" IS through humor. its kindof a double edged sword
right well that was my jumbled mess of psychoanalysing tommyinnit i hope he is alright and all that because well that was. something
188 notes · View notes
ghousttm · 3 days ago
Text
i feel like Evbo and Emf are different from most of everyone in parkour civilization, and it really adds to their dynamic
i like to think park civ culture is big on improving and looking after yourself and it makes most people not value one another or even have bonds or connections
This is especially apparent in the noob level where people would die quickly so its better to not get attached
and in the master level where you often form enemies than anything
even in the pro level its all about focusing on improving your own skills and doing your own thing. Most park civ citizens are closed off and dont bat an eye on other people, its the norm
Those two are one of the few people who helps others before themselves when it comes to it. I mean, theyre the only two people who actively did anything to fix the system
Evbo has always been someone who encourages others and wants to see others progress besides himself, indiscriminately
and emf seems to be someone who wants to help others (evbo), at first for the sake of greater good and a second time (jumping into the void) just because he wants to help his friend
Put two people who's whole thing is valuing another and have rarely ever been genuinely valued themself by others and you get yourself A Dynamic For Sure.
maybe emf's whole thing s'that he has always been one who helps the people he wants to succeed, but he never thought of himself succeeding anymore than what he already is. After all master is the highest he's sure he can get.. and his skills are very average for his rank. This is where he belongs, and he plays the part, as a small insignificant piece of a collective. He can't actually do more as himself, no that's evbo's thing! He's amazing and he's a walking talent, what emf is Supposed to do is support him!
But then suddenly, Evbo risked his life just to save him, and trusted him to be the new parkour champion
Him, emf, some nobody.
why? What did someone so great, someone who'd ascended above the highest rank he'd even known, see in someone so average?
but to Evbo, emf is so much more than average.
The average doesnt help him, doesnt believe in him, doesnt give him the chances to be able to be where he is at now, doesnt jump into the void like an idiot with no sure return. He's so so different than 'the average', Evbo has a trust and, dare i say, love for Emf that doesnt exist anywhere in parkour civilization
nowhere to anyone but to him and him only.
He was the first stars Evbo ever had seen. To evbo..
He doesn't look like the night sky,, the night sky looks like him.
They place a pedestal for one another in their own heads and i think that's precious.
In a civilization where everybody looks forward at the jumps in front of them and barely to their sides, to the people jumping with them
They look each other in the eyes, with a care and appreciation that's worth an extremely gay legend to be written about in parkour only to be summed up to "they were best friends" don't you know what it means to be more than allies in Second Era Parkour Civilization???
72 notes · View notes
oakskull · 18 hours ago
Note
You know I have never been interested in any FiM but your pony moshang post is very detailed and extremely good!! I absolutely love how you write your world building and the designs are also soooo good!!
Do you have any snippets about pony moshangs shenanigans or daily life?
-🥭 anon
sure thing buddy we're off to shenanigans for this one👍👍
Baby SQH:
Shang Qinghua didn't get his cutie mark until the system activated and he got all his memories. Before this point he kept trying to use magic and was extremely confused/ upset. Didn't even really try flying because his family was mostly earth pony farmers. He skipped town for Cang Qiong when he was way too young and payed negative attention to his family.
Tumblr media
Disiple Era:
A non-crystal pony wearing the little hair accessories doesn't nessasarily mean anything, but when they are given as a gift it generally has a romantic meaning in the sense of "you're joining my family". A bit of an archaic courting method that was more popular when the northern kingdom was more disconnected from the rest of the realm. Airplane didn't write this persay but in an original story he had MBJ give some hair bands to LBH as a sign of allegience, or something, and had the gay undertones as a way to piss off readers. He doesn't remember this at all and probably wouldn't have remembered if it was in the final novel anyway
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
it took SQH an embaressing amount of time to figure out how to wear the hair bands. Mobei Jun doesn't know he doesnt really wear them.
24 notes · View notes
anonymousgayrobot · 3 days ago
Note
bestie you're the only person i agree with about the finale of the penguin
everyone seems so surprised that os is a villain and im ????? did everyone miss that time he set a guy on fire in front of his mother??????? did everyone miss him leaving sofia for dead after she found out he was manipulating her????? he's been a monster all along, that doesn't make him any less of a layered character
i really wish vic hadn't died but his death didn't feel like a revelation of how evil oswald is to me. i think this episode was more about the lies that os tells himself to feel better about his life than it was about "he was evil all along and you too fell for his manipulation". why else would he say all that as he strangled him? vic was dying. if it was about getting rid of him because he didn't need him anymore, why would he bother saying anything?
also that last scene with os pretending to dance with his mom was fucked up but it also seems to me like another way of showing how he's choosing to live in a world of his own lies. he can't deal with the truth, so he doesn't. it's easier that way. and this doesn't make him any less of a monster; it just makes him a complex one.
anyway your analysis is on point and i can't believe they killed off vic to progress os's character
HI! YES i totally agree; please don’t mind my lengthy yapping— i have sooooo much to say about this show
one thing I noticed predominantly throughout the show is the level and intricacies of complexity the characters were given, which you typically don’t see in the average shows pumped out these days, where good and bad is black and white and behavior will always be ‘straightforward’ with the character, unlike in real life where a person’s true nature will more than often contradict their actions, whether that be in acts of denial, or repressing something. whether large or grand, we all do it—so I kind of disagree with people only seeing this finale at surface level.
I really do think Sofia kind of ‘cracked the egg’ with dismantling or at least shaking loose oz’s denials through aggravating the unhealed wound of his brothers and the unspoken wounds between him and his mother; i saw that scene as sofia trying to force out feelings of remorse from oz, which I believe he repressed x100 after his brothers’ deaths, as seeing his expression struggle to remain stoic and continuously denying the truth even if it cost his mother her finger (if he did lack any true guilt, he would’ve admitted it much sooner with indifference ; and if he didn’t feel guilt but never admitted the truth to solely benefit his mother, he would not have hesitated to admit the truth with that priority over his mother. But he doesnt) . But by ‘dismantling’ oz himself, she unleashes this newer version of himself—she showed an opportunist what happens when he slips up with his greed and pauses to care for someone other than himself/guard. before sal and sofia find his mother, sal angrily comments that oz has no one—no one they could weaponize. family is weaponry, a step above simpler loyalty. someone can have as many allies as they want, but it doesn’t mean anything if they’re expendable. oz has viewed all of his allies as expendable, like sal, sofia, and the rest of the gang leaders. victor was an ally initially expendable and a failsafe for alberto’s murder, but upon becoming his protégé, an emotional tie was thrown in.
So in order to fully prevent his guard from ever slipping up again (caring for his mother despite the endangerment), he cannot similarly care for anyone else again (caring about victor despite the endangerment). so vic has to be shut out completely now both for oz’s self-preservation and possibly vic’s ‘preservation’ in a more morbid sense, by knowing his life is now endangered by his own care for oz likewise. who knows what sofia could do to him and what she could wrench out to harm oz again. and when he ‘shuts’ vic out, he has to shut out any sympathies/empathies that follow.
when he steals the money from his wallet, I saw it more as a not-wasting-resources gesture (sewers blown up + crown point hideout raided) rather than genuinely-indifferent disrespect, which goes in hand with that ever-prevalent opportunistic characteristic. “it wasn’t for nothing.” throwing away his ID also appeared disrespectful, but with how his expression froze, it was clear he was shutting out unwanted feelings of regret, perhaps a rogue emotion (seeing as he expresses nearly no remorse for his actions and lies his way around it to avoid it altogether), and threw it away briskly. He needed that reminder gone before the feeling could settle in. (a lack of expression does not always mean a lack of feeling)
If anything, killing victor could also symbolize oz killing his former self—tragically fitting for a finale and change of occupation/direction. it was obvious that he saw himself through vic, or at least began to until it reached a point of no return. That idea could also be applied through vic finding strength in family—oz realizes that was his own undoing, family, and that vic was officially non-expendable. It’d already been basic knowledge that non-expendable people are lethal tools of manipulation (using taj to also kill nadia, and their deaths against sal, alberto against sofia even if it was pinned on the maronis anyways).
And you’re right about him killing vic differently. In the beginning of the show, if he’d done what was expected and had shot vic while his back was turned—it’d be quick and easy, indifferent like everyone else. Same with the second time he nearly killed vic, Oz gives in and spares him, giving him yet another chance even when it didn’t benefit Oz at the moment. Oz centers those around him with how they benefit him, so choosing to spare victor despite the potential burden is an obvious sign of care. Although it makes it much more twisted, oz killing victor the way he did was the furthest thing from indifferent. He could’ve lifted his hand at any moment, but didn’t until the end, further exposing his need to snuff out his own weakness, his care for victor. its the ultimate and worst father-son moment— oz recognizing his care for victor as his protégé to be non-expendable, and the recognition that he couldn’t let himself genuinely care for another person again. i see a lot of people saying that there was no reason for oz to kill victor after everything he did for him—but that’s the exact reason why he needed to. Vic did all of that because he was just that close to Oz, not even taking that exit when given, his loyalty had become familial which could become just as dangerous as Oz’s love for his mother. I also think Oz’s care for vic was similar to the nature of his lies regarding his brothers—not it being a lie itself but rather getting caught up in the short term benefits and attention while blocking out the long term consequences waiting—perhaps distracted by becoming this fatherly figure as a fatherless son himself to a fatherless boy, and avoiding the inevitable pain at the end of the road (their criminal circumstances/predicament) until it’s too late and boils over from his mother’s incident. its also important to note the unique situation this is and how heavily survival and preservation is involved here. Oz can’t care about anyone, it’s dangerous and just as dangerous for everyone else involved in crime (alberto to sofia, nadia + taj to sal). its why he was untouchable when his mother was still hidden, he had nothing to lose—but after sofia, oz learned his lesson the hard way about exceptions, urging him to turn his attention towards vic for the last time.
It could also be similar to how he never returned his brothers despite having time and even staring out the window (slowly killing victor with time to change his mind). It could be that in the moment as a child he was accepting the situation for what it was, he’d killed his brothers and needed to assess what to do, but us the viewer have to keep in mind his opportunistic personality (hinted by oz’s admiration of rex despite his older brother’s moral aversion) and the possibility of shock feigning as indifference (i say this because of the severity of oz’s denial reminds me of a trauma response). as many children do, he sought the short term benefit—the short term benefit was keeping his mother’s affection over disrupting that current peace and causing long term harm. (i don’t really believe the real reason was to have it solely for himself, mostly because it was only from his mother’s bias/pov and then by sofia who was only out to hurt him—but i think he just wanted to sustain it). by seeking the short term benefit of saying nothing and sharing a nice moment with his mother, it also further highlights, as you said, his inability to deal with the truth and the lies he upholds to keep his own peace (something his mother also did by constantly lying to oz that she didn’t know what he’d done and actually loathed him for it instead)—a ticking time bomb which sofia uses and demolishes completely, or at least enough for the viewers to realize the severity of oz’s delusions, which as you said, had been prevalent since the beginning, but never quite the full depth or scope of.
20 notes · View notes
lnkedmyheart · 2 years ago
Text
People saying Dazai has done more for Sigma than anyone else when my man has been constantly risking his life to save people since before leaving the mafia. He risked his life (and the city) to give Chuuya a choice at 16, he tried to risk his life for Oda in dark era, he risked his life and actually flat lined in Dazai's entrance exam, he risked his life for the agency and got shot, he risked his life during dead apple and has been super gentle with Chuuya after every use of corruption barring the fight with lovecraft, he is now risking his life for Sigma. I am sorry but Dazai has always been a normal person with severe mental illness exploited by his environment and those around him till he was left feeling inhuman and desperate for death. He has been trying again and again and I hate ya'll for acting like this is the first time he's been nice or self sacrificing since the series started.
Edit: it wasn't DEE it was 55 minutes where his heart stopped and Yosano healed him. I mixed that up somehow.
2K notes · View notes
reel-fear · 6 months ago
Text
Genuinely so curious who Mike thinks is gonna be buying The Cage or the new DCTL GN bc with the way he tweets as far as he's concerned, it's not gonna be:
The queer people he has actively admitted he will never show any representation of in the games.
Tumblr media
2. The POC he has actively fought against representing in his franchise. [Who he also mocked for thinking they would be represented in his franchise]
3. The Bendy fandom which has always been concerned with topics of diversity esp in the sense of queer people since its creation. Who he has responded to really poorly esp in regards to the GN.
4. The fans who critique him. [He blocked me for doing so lol]
Tumblr media
5. His fans in general who he tweets about like this currently. [He's being vague about why people were mad at him or sent him 'nasty messages' because if you actually looked into why you'd see he was in the wrong. Either way, a very hateful way to speak abt ur own fanbase.]
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Reminder while Mike is trash talking his fans he has always treated them rather poorly. The fans who won the fanart contest for Chapter 5 never got their posters actually in game due to it being rushed. Not only was chapter 5 a big slap to the face story wise, but it was literally so rushed he couldn't be bothered to add in the art his fans gave him for his game FOR FREE. [Meatly blames this on a crazy timeline, reminder him and Mike are the literal ceos of this company. The proposal of future updates here is also pretty cruel considering Mike nowadays happily admits he corrupted Chapter 5's source code and therefore literally can't update it At All currently. Because he is a moron]
At least they got to be in Boris and the dark survival, and by that I mean that was the Only game they got to be in so far, isn't that just treating your fans like you love them? Shoving their hard work into a spin off game almost nobody has played or addresses much. [Hell, who knows if with the Lone Wolf rebrand they'll even stay there. In which case they'll be in None of the games, only in the credits of BATIM]
6. The Bendy fans who just generally disagree with him on stuff. Like the new ink demon design where there is literally a public poll showing people generally prefer the old one.
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
7. The Bendy fans who can see he is actively lying to them. To their fucking faces.
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
He says this has always been the case, but screenshots and links to tweets regarding the books being canon prove it was not. Does he really think bendy fans are stupid or something? [Unless he's admitting here he lied to Kress when he told her the books were canon which sounds worse!]
8. Anyone who doesn't like the idea of giving money to a guy who laid off tons of employees then afterwards thought it was a great idea to express his anti-union views! Also brag about how good of an employer he was, according to his employees, he was not!
Tumblr media
So in summary; Mike is an awful person who has not learned anything from the awful things he did. I will not be purchasing The Cage because, combined with this and his absolute refusal to take any kind of critique or see any differing interpretation of his franchise, I have no reason to think my problems with the franchise will ever be addressed or fixed. I probably will pirate The Cage along with any future Bendy Products [Including the movie] and will do my best to avoid giving it any kind of monetary support. Unless this changes any time soon, I can't see myself making anymore positive Bendy posts soon.
Mike has just managed to make it so hard to speak positively or optimistically of this franchise when he's so willing to broadcast how little he cares about it or its fans. I'm at the point where I refuse to pull any of my punches with my problems with it. What's the point of trying to play nice with my critique when either way the people creating it don't care?
So with this post, I want to invite anyone who feels similarly about the franchise to tell me, make a post or send an ask talking about how all of this makes you feel. It may not change how things are, but genuinely seeing other people share my feelings of anger makes me feel better. It feels nice to see when other people share our same concerns and worries. I'd also love to know if anyone else thinks they'll be avoiding purchasing Bendy products over this.
I'm not forcing anyone to participate in it nor trying to say anyone who doesn't supports mike but genuinely maybe if we can collectively decide to boycott things like the movie, graphic novel and The Cage... It might at least make the bendy devs acknowledge how much they have destroyed their own fandom's faith and trust in them.
The way Mike tweets about his actions like he had no control over why people were mad at him at least proves to me he takes NONE of it back nor regrets it. If you didn't know about his actions and only went off his tweets, you would be led to believe Mike has been needlessly picked apart by fans over things he couldn't control [or in his own words, had his words twisted and taken out of context]. That is not how you speak about your actions if you have actually learned better from them.
anyway, that has been my bendy dev callout post. This is an open invitation to anyone feeling similarly upset about the way the franchise is going to talk about it. It's genuinely nice to see how people feel about this and the more we talk about the more it's likely the bendy devs are forced to address our concerns. I don't think they will but hey, that's why I'm not gonna support them with my money anymore nor am I gonna be nice to them in any content I make critiquing Bendy. I mean I'm also basically making this post just in case anyone asks me Why I feel this way towards to bendy devs/as a way to respond to anyone who thinks I am too harsh in my critique in the future.
As always, it seems the best part of Bendy isn't actually anything about canon but about what the fan's are creating with the ideas Bendy failed to do anything interesting with.
Also the books, the books slap.
#batim#batdr#bendy and the ink machine#bendy and the dark revival#ramblez#bendy and the silent city#bendy the cage#for the record another reason Im making this post is bc some of the only good resources to learn abt why the bendy devs suck are some old#very longer videos and this is a very long post but I thought it was important to document the recent shit theyve been doing alongside some#of the worst past things theyve done bc Mike has been trying to misinform people on what happened but those videos are still great resource#if you want more info n such#long post#mike D#for anyone who doesnt wanna hear abt him since he doesnt go by mood anymore#sorry if this is rambley or emotional Im just so sick of these guys fr dskjhgskdfjghskdjhgkjhsd#I miss when I didnt spend my days stressed about the awful shit mike is gonna say next and how I would have to disprove it in a post later#or explain why its bad to have a cast of nothing but cishet white guys n constantly fight back against any push for diversity in said cast#genuinely its just tiring esp when u see other bendy fans give ignorant or very silly defenses/takes on those things#n then u lose a lot of respect for them bc they are speaking on stuff they dont know much abt so confidently and therefore misinforming#people or even encouraging very bad views on stuff like diversity n its importance#Im not saying people like that are bad people but it is stressful n upsetting when u see someone u thought knew better do that sort of thin#it makes it hard to trust them again on other issues bc u now dont trust they know what they r talking abt!!#like please think twice before telling young artists making norman white was a tough and complicated decision it was fucking not the bendy#devs just think all their humans are white by default and dont wanna change that its been proven time n time again thats all it is#and defending them just bc u like a franchise they made is very very bad!! They are not ur friends!! they suck and we seriously need to#stop pretending they dont!! toxic positivity is only gonna make the fandom an absolute nightmare its not gonna make ANYTHING better#it just means people will be forced to PRETEND they never have negative thoughts abt the franchise n therefore make them burned out#just look at other similar fandoms please lets not make those same mistakes!!#sorry can u tell Ive been having just. A time recently#anyways back to making my queer ass bendy fan game full of so much diversity mike will prolly shit when he sees it DKFJGHKSDJHGKJHSD
72 notes · View notes
baldurs-gate-official · 1 year ago
Text
Thinking about Astarion and trauma again (shocking)
He really is the first character I've seen that depicts PTSD/C-PTSD the way he does. He's angry. He's collecting the pieces of himself he had to chip away over the years and figuring out how to fit them back together again, and it's hard.
I rarely see good PTSD rep in media (and C-PTSD is even less depicted/understood). And when I do, it's always the soft pitiable side of it. The side of it that's more palatable and easy to accept. But the reality is that the trauma that stems from such abuse can be vicious, and messy. It can lash out and push people away. Bring out the worst in you, at times. It can be so, so angry.
I love that we see that in Astarion. Both because it's good representation, and because I'm a survivor too. I'm angry. I'm upset. I want to kick and scream about it, but I can't. I feel like I must always remain in control, or that displaying those feelings will only hurt those around me and push them away. I don't want that. I don't want to hurt others or be alone.
Seeing Astarion do those things, being angry and messy over it all... It makes me so happy. He says things to Cazador I wish I could say to my own abusers, with no regard to how others perceive it. He doesn't hold back. And I get to see a character with a very similar kind of trauma do/say the things I only dream about, and not be abandoned for it. He's given the chance to heal and grow as a person, and feel loved. He gets to have a happy ending.
And he gets to be mad. And that's ok.
#bg3#astarion#text post#cw trauma#cw ptsd#ive never seen a character before with such a similarish past to mine#i feel so seen and understood#i hate that ive had to be silent about it#i hate it so much#it means SO much to see a character with such good CPTSD rep#and see so many people love his character#i recently escaped my own abusers so this sort of thing makes me very emotional#the way he talks about torture too and doesnt try to sugar coat it#i was tortured too. my bones were broken repeatedly for someone elses amusement and it was fucking horrible#years of that#and starvation#among other things#and ive never seen a character before thats been through something similar#ive never even seen a character before this that specifically has CPTSD#ive seen characters who *should* have been written with CPTSD but its as if the writers just googled PTSD and went with that#(C-PTSD comes from continued exposure to trauma over the course of months or years where PTSD is often from a singular event)#(the symptoms differ a bit. and Astarion is a very good example of C-PTSD)#it just makes me really happy. and it makes me feel like people might understand and not blame me for what happened#well. some people do anyway. but. this kind of representation helps a lot with helping people understand#seriously though ive had people act like theyd have fared better in my situation. or blamed me for what happened#how fucked is that???? i want to chew glass whenever it happens#its always people whove never had any experience with abuse too#but they have the audacity to tell me theyre built different or something#q
69 notes · View notes
icewindandboringhorror · 7 months ago
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
boy in silly sitting positions compilation
#cats#I especially like the last one where he just has one single paw poking out of that box for some reason lol#I still have costumes to post and like a billion other things.... grr... constantly failing at staying active on social media aughh#I think because currently my Main Focus is on trying to get my game done and stuff.. which basically just means sitting and writing all day#so there's not much to post about. Though I know the Good At Social Media thing to do would be to post about the#writing and share progress and talk about the game and characters or whatever to try to build interest or something but that is SOOO weird#to me.. I could maybe get it if it was like a tiny tiny discord groupchat of playtesters with like 5 people in#it.. But something about talking openly about things before they happen is weird to me?? Like presumptuous feeling or something#''oooo guess whats gonna happen LATER!!!'' like.. how do you know.. what if it doesnt. what if you dont finish it. what if its not the way#you think it's going to be. what if something changes. etc. Like I literally avoid movie trailers and game trailers for the same reason ghj#Even if it's not ME doing it it just feels... weird.. Maybe it has to do with my OCD and how I just don't like talking about ''future''#things in Certain Terms. Like if I was going to say ''Oh yeah sure. come over to my house in a few months''. I would have to follow it up#with like ''HOPEFULLY you can come over to my house in a few months'' or 'They'll come over in a few months MOST LIKELY''. Because just#stating that something will happen matter of factly takes for granted like.. what if somehting horrible happens and I DONT have a house#in a few months? or what if something bad happens to me. or to the person coming over? I can't ever DEFINITELY say with 100% certainty#that one could ACTUALLY come to my house in a few months. anything could change. So I have to allot for that in my phrasing. hbjjkn#There are a lot of situations where you're expected to just Assume Things but for some reason that bothers me. My brain literally does not#even Assume the most basic things.. like how do *I* know that just because it's someones birthday that they want to be wished a happy#birthday? what if they dont? everyone is different and has different preferences. I should check with them first. or wait until they public#ly announce that theyre accepting birthday wishes. I have to allot for all 5034859069 rare possibilities at any given time and never take#anything for certain. etc. ghjbjhbh.... ANYWAY.. I have been feeling a bit sick lately as usual.. but still slowly making progress on some#things. Moslty I need to edit costume photos. make sculptures. and work on the game. Going back reading some of the old writing from like#2018 and suprisingly I don't have to change that much of it? In fact I like it mostly. so that's good. I would be very interested if I were#playing the game myself. Though that doesnt mean much since my tastes are so niche lol..#Still really want to clear some of my million tumblr drafts as well... alas and aughh and ooughh and so on and so forth. Between all of my#evil appointments other such things...why cant I have one billion dollar to retire into relaxed hermit artist life of no stressors.. bleas
39 notes · View notes
sqlmn · 8 months ago
Text
Tumblr media
Lightning, water, and fire! Like forever before the plot starts. By the time the plot starts, the lightning and fire deities have been subjected to punishment by the two gods that picked them.
Oh (the fire deity) is first to be punished. They basically decide that since they're going to live for a long time, gotta set some long time goals! And they opt to be the wrath of the gods since most of the other deities are too 'soft' in their opinion. So Oh just. Smites humans. This isn't really a /good/ thing and in their defense mentally, they do it to help Ymber since he's the softest of them all. So their punishment by the gods is to be split in two, effectively halving the power of one into two. (Now they are in a male and a female body and use both male and female pronouns apart since they together make they but apart it feels weird to be they. But prior to the split they use they/them. Also the split bodies go by the names Ohiwe and Ohime.)
Fulj is the second to be punished. She falls in love with a mortal woman and that is a crime according to the gods. Mortals and immortals are not to be together and it will only bring suffering to both sides. So her punishment is her memories of the woman are stripped and her body basically broken to the point she can't remain physical all the time.
Ymber, unfortunately, is the one who blames himself for the discoveries and punishments. If he had only tried to restrain Oh more then maybe they would have chilled out and stopped before being punished. If he had only tried to persuade Fulj to not continue seeing the mortal woman so often perhaps she wouldn't have been punished. So he's just increasing the guilt on his shoulders every day that he remains unpunished since the elder gods have both laid down to rest. They can't enforce their laws anymore and none of the deities are keen on harming one another at this point. They just want to continue existing in peace.
#the daily life of a deity sucks#and then ymber falls in love with a human and is like welp this sucks and i understand fulj now#i also would have accepted the punishment for this#and fulj doesnt even remember the woman she was punished for and doesnt remember how she was before#so she is like hey ymber please just go and kiss the weird human i dont even like him but youre being mean by not kissing him#and ymber is just having the worst time of his life being encouraged by someone who used to be so happy#who he also encouraged to be happy once upon a time#also ohiwe and ohime pop up in the water city to bully ymber sometimes but its still in the way of#dude we like you please grow a spine its been a thousand years please grow a backbone and tell us to piss off#and he never tells them to piss off#also fulj has a long braid here but you cant really see it#and she loves to braid ymbers hair and he gets to braid hers when shes giggling and chatting about love#and a short while after the punishment fulj chops the braid off and ymber is like welp my friend is officially gone#and then he cuts his own hair and leaves to go develop his city alone in seclusion#and he sometimes just cuts it really short because hes still sad and soggy and thinks of fulj braiding his hair#and then she shows up one day when hes debating how long its getting and she smiles#and tells him he looks good with longer hair#so he kinda keeps it a messy short then it gets to be medium and he decides he can survive with medium but he couldnt do long again#but once again fulj is the reason for his life choices (and guilt)#also before anyone asks yes all the deities have a collar#its very important actually that they are collared its lore information thanks#and for what it matters - after oh is split both forms are just as tall#theres just two of them at half power but they are both tall
22 notes · View notes
angerygoomba · 4 months ago
Text
listening to ants from up there like a normal healthy person that has relationships that they know will thrive and will not be lost and is certain of their future and enjoys whats happening today and what was happening yesterday and last week and last month. and im cool about it
#ants from up there#intro#chaos space marine#concorde#bread song#good will hunting#haldern#mark's theme#the place where he inserted the blade#snow globes#basketball shoes#guys dont listen to this album it makes you cry a lot#and crying is bad (true)#anyways is anyone else thinking about anything#help#help core lolllll#i have no idea whats in store and ive never liked that ever#i need a react image where a person is staring death into the camera especially now#because ive been feeling it so so so much more lately than before and ive felt it so hard since before summer#i really have no idea how much better this is than jobless summer mentally#i mean in a way it has to be better than summer school summer but at least then i had the inbetween week of the two terms#and yes thankfully i have parents who have enough money to spend two weeks of vacation out of the country which is coming up on saturday#and it will be relaxing ​ignoring the socializing of family i havent seen in 5 years#but so much of the past month has felt like ive only done work#i feel like my mind is consumed by my job and i really dont know if i like this state of being more than my jobless state of being#i also havent had a workless summer since grade 10 and i was still insecure about my friend group so i didnt go to a lot of the hangouts#but in grade 11 and this year i totally couldve gone to more and felt like i made more worthwhile memories#i wanna say more but tumblr doesnt let you do more than 30 tags#long one#goomb thot
5 notes · View notes
july-19th-club · 7 months ago
Text
hate when i'm having insomnia and i cant point to the exact reason . which to be fair is a problem i have elsewhere but i want to be able to pin down a specific thing i did and go welp won't do that again and then the problem would stop . but instead i do everything 'right' according to what has worked perfectly every single night for a month . and then it doesn't work for some bullshit reason .
3 notes · View notes
cappyjara · 2 years ago
Text
Tumblr media
seeing the mario movie in like an hour letsa gooooooo
13 notes · View notes
peppermintack · 2 months ago
Text
ok after nearly five years i finally watched the finale of runaways and i just gotta say. what the fuck
1 note · View note
hecksupremechips · 5 months ago
Text
People in the notes have said physical therapist Akihiko and ohohoho you fools you fucking clowns you don’t even know. Imagine Shinji getting out of the coma and all the rehabilitation shit he’s gotta do all the physical therapy like you just know Akihiko is so fucking over the moon he’s done so much research he’s so excited to see Shinji have a “training regime” he infodumps about what’s happening with the muscle recovery process and what stretches work best hes just way too invested he talks over doctors and Shinji is just like “good god if you know so much why don’t you just be a physical therapist” and Akihiko’s like 😈
Akihiko becoming a cop is something that simply doesn’t happen in the coma route cuz Shinji would see that shit and be like Aki what the actual hell is wrong with you
#like he does feel upset seeing shinji in such a vulnerable state and struggling with everything#but it does get overshadowed by excitement mitsuru is like ‘please he just got out of a coma stop being so pushy 😵‍💫’#hes just so invested he gets to learn so much shit he never even considered before its so interesting#and i think itd be very important that hes much more aware of like limits this time cuz a big strain in his relationship with shinji was#aki being pushy and not understanding shinjis limits and shinji being bad at letting himself have limits and communicating them#and like its very important not to push too hard when recovering from a coma cuz itll just make things worse#its a big adjustment for both of them cuz akihiko definitely has always been told to push harder past limits and to always try to be#stronger and not let yourself stop and its more important now than ever to unlearn that attitude#and shinji is so all or nothing like he either quits too fast or pushes to the point of destruction without communicating anything#so its very easy for him to get trapped in a hopeless spiral when things take time and then get desperate and try too hard#but he gets a lot of encouragement from everyone this time and its sooo weird and annoying and overwhelming but it is nice#also quick tangent like really pisses me off when ppl write shinji just like MIRACULOUSLY SPRINGING OUT of the coma like he just pops awake#gets up and starts running to do shit which tbf the game does it too but its like dude hes been in a like 6 month coma#im not an expert i still got a lotta research to do but i mean theres so much shit hes gonna go through#even if theres no like brain damage youre still gonna have to relearn basic stuff like eating breathing walking and like. general awareness#of your surroundings and who you are and what happened to you and 6 months is so long too so its gonna be rough#im not saying you gotta give him like brain damage but damn at least establish that recovery is lengthy and difficult#his ass is not walking around!!!#also hes still got a lot of mental illness and like did get shot fully believing he deserved to die so like hes also gotta lot of mental#health recovery to be doing like unless he somehow has some magical therapy coma dreams things arent gonna be perfect peachy for him#i get wanting to make everything happy but idk personally i think id rather it be gradual and a struggle cuz its more realistic and like#i think having this character just miraculously be fine is such a disservice like i think he deserves to have love and hope for him even#when its difficult cuz his life will never be easy he’ll never be free from the trauma but that doesnt mean his life isnt worth living#and him being loved unconditionally even though hes a ‘burden’ is so so important to me#i just hate the laziness like wheres the love man wheres the genuine character appreciation#anyway physical therapist aki its canon now hed be so so good at it and hes got personal experience
280 notes · View notes
cvnt4him · 3 months ago
Text
Think’n ab cock warming izuku
A lazy Saturday morning, he has to get up later to finish some papers but that's a problem for later izuku. You wake up earlier than him for the first time ever, you admire his beautiful features whilst hes in slumber land.
His forest green hair being portrayed in the most beautiful lighting, said lighting brightening up his face despite being asleep, he's such a bright person he doesnt even need the suns array of beautiful sunshine for that. His slightly chewed lips dry yet so plump and kissable, the freckles that popped out more due to the sun's colors beaming on his beautifully tanned skin. He was gorgeous.
You leaned down to plant a gentle kiss onto his sleeping face, cupping his cheeks as you do so. The touch on his face makes him jolt and try and scoot away, his eyes squeezing shut and annoyance being painted on his features, he groans and tries to pull away but only to stay in the same place due to you holding his face.
Izuku was annoyed and opened his slightly crusted eyes to see your face, his eyes immediately softened. Finally being able to see his gorgeous emerald green eyes, you smile in content. He hums and closes his eyes again before you pepper kisses all around his face.
“ good morning~“
You sing in his ear, making him hum once more. He didn't want to be awake, izuku wanted to lounge around all day and be lazy with his other half before he had to go and teach a bunch of noisy kids, who he did love dearly.
“ you're always awake before me! I'm surprised I managed to get up before you!“
Izuku peers his eyes open slightly to look up at you with furrowed brows in annoyance, he groans and rolls his eyes before closing them again, all you can do is giggle at your adorable husband. You scoot in closer to him and squeeze his cheeks making him huff.
Izuku then sits up and yanks you into him making you bury your face in his chest. Your eyes widened in surprise but you weren't exactly complaining. He holds you close with a tight grip ensuring you can't move even if you tried.
“ go t’sleep baby. ’know you're tired, j’s get some rest hon.“
Izuku lazily gets out, his speech slightly slurred and his voice raspy and groggy do to the morning. He was a morning person, by all means but sometimes all he wanted was to be lazy with his significant other, and you seem to be ruining it by touching him whilst he's trying to sleep.
“ ’zuku m’not tired.“
“ shut up.“
Trying with all of your might you manage to squeeze out of his arms and roll onto of him making him turn over on his back, he groans and looks up to you with angry eyes ones you never really seem to see.
“ can I cockwarm you?“
His once angry eyes were now wide and confused. You wake up and the only thing on your mind is dick? Really? He groans again with a blush to his freckled and still baby-like cheeks, a scar on his right cheek. He was hesitant, he really was fathoming it, debating, thinking about it, whatever you want to say he truly was.
Izuku was having a hard time deciding, he did want you to do that to him only because he was particularly pent up, you two hadn't had sex in about 3 weeks? Thats far too long for someone like izuku, he would never force you to do something of the sort, normally you initiate sex and he happily obliges, but you both have been very busy recently and haven't had time to do much more than hold each other when nightfall returns at the end of everyday.
Izuku finally had an answer, he gulps and looks back up at your happy and waiting eyes. You would've been okay with either answer, really. You just wanted him to be inside of you. With a blush still on his cheeks, he nods to you before looking away.
“ I want a verbal answer my love.“
He sighs at your words, eyes shutting as he clears his throat trying to get rid of the grogginess of the morning time.
“ yes, you can c... cock.. warm me...“
Izuku manages to get the confirmation out as you giggle and lay down beside him, confused he follows you insuit, you scoot back into him and pull down his sleeping shorts just enough to get his flaccid cock out. You stroke him a little trying to get him to harden up, gentle tugs at his fat and heavy cock in your hand, the weight of it is always nice but the stretch is always better. The thought alone brung a smile to your face.
Izuku watched your movements closely, admiring the way you were so sweet and gentle with his member, so careful with such soft movements it made him twitch in your hand. With that, you knew he was ready. He gulped as you turned around and pulled your underwear to the side scooting back onto him and pushing his cock inside of you.
You both wince and groan and make some kind of noise as he tries to push his way inside, you were tight and he felt just how much so, going straight to his head as he gulped down hardly. His brain was getting fuzzy from the intense squeeze to his cock, you really should've prepped yourself first. with a couple of minutes waiting you finally manage to get him inside, he bottoms out almost immediately he's always so needy and impatient when it comes to things like this he ended up thrusting into you making you fall forward and moan.
“ zu what are you.. doing?“
You ask slightly out of breath, he was choking on his breath trying his hardest not to absolutely ram his cock in and out of you like he knows he needs. God izuku was so horny he just wanted to fuck you so badly.
“ s- sorry.. hon I- ngh~...“
He sentence was ended by a muffled groan, you really were squeezing his cock so tight. You take breather and scoot back into him, his cock still being buried deep inside. It makes him moan softly into your ear as you get closer, a beautiful noose that you always welcome and are always pleased to hear. He hums in a whiney tone on accident, getting extremely red when you laugh at the desperate sound escaping your poor husband.
You sigh happily as you can feel his heavy cock stuffing you full, twitching occasionally when you pulse around him. Izuku held you close wrapping his hands around your stomach, he buried his face in your neck trying to lull himself back to sleep, you intoxicating smell so sweet and driving him absolutely feral. He tried so hard to go back to sleep but he was having a hard time, his cock was so deep inside of you and only getting deeper as time passed yet he wasn't fucking you. Not like he wanted to.
Izuku sighed desperately and defeatedly as he looked down at you only to see you asleep with a smile on your face. For fucks sake. There was no way he was getting back to sleep, and absolutely no way hes not blowing his load deep inside of you.. if he even gets to cum.
3K notes · View notes
evie-sturns · 3 months ago
Text
Never have I ever - matt sturniolo
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
summary: an innocent game of never have i ever with your bestfriend matt, turns into you finding out his biggest secret, hes still a virgin. you have to teach him a thing or two.
contains: smut, virginity loss, clueless!matt, inexperienced!matt x experienced!reader, fluff, making out, bestfriend!matt.
-------------------------------------------------------------
"okay- never have i everr... pissed the bed above the age of 16." i laugh, staring at matt who has a grin on his face.
"i am GLAD to say i have not." matt smiles, wiping his face.
"whatt!! i have!" i exclaim,
matt and i burst out laughing, him pushing me over on the bed. i fall on my back, still uncontrollably laughing.
i sit back up on the matress,
"your turn now!" i say,
matt pushes his glasses up the bridge of his nose, they slip down everytime he speaks.
"i dont have one!" matt instantly snaps back, shutting down my suggestion.
"okay ill go again." i grin cheekily.
"never have i everrr cried after sex." i speak,
matt visibly tenses, his smile faltering.
"oh- um- i dont know-" matt laughs nervously, scratching the back of his neck.
matt adjusts his glasses again, something he seems to do when he’s nervous.
"come onn, you can tell me!" i push,
matts eyes are going everywhere but mine, his cheeks flushed and his hands fidgety.
"im- like.. what- what do you mean." matt stammers,
"are you okay? you dont have to say." i say softly,
"no its fine- it doesnt- just shut up.” he mumbles,
“if you have it’s fine!!” i giggle
“i’ve never like- done anything so…” matt says quietly, an awkward chuckle escaping his lips.
“what?”
matt avoids eye contact, “it’s not a big deal,”
i nod, “no yeah- i know it’s not a big deal i just was convinced you’ve done a lot.”
matt shakes his head, “no.”
i grab his hand, “you know you can tell me stuff like that, right?”
he nods, “it’s just embarrassing..”
i shake my head, “no it’s not, i would never judge you.”
he sighs, running a hand through his hair. his cheeks are deep red and his head is tilted down and his gaze is fixed on his lap.
matt’s never really talked about his sex life, he’s always been a reserved person ever since i met him, now i can see why.
“i’ve never even made out with a girl, like i’ve kissed and shit but never made out, isn’t that so embarrassing?” matt starts to open up
“you’ve never even made out?” i repeat, my eyes widening.
“see- that reaction is why i don’t tell people.” matt groans, flopping back on the pillows as he throws his face into his hands.
“no- no it’s not a bad thing!” i state,
matt’s nods silently,
i stare down at him as he looks up at me,
suddenly he speaks.
“would you teach me stuff if i asked.” he blurts out
“pardon?” i say, not convinced that i heard him correctly.
“like how to have sex and stuff, if not that’s okay and we’ll forget this whole thing ever happened- i just trust you a lot and i feel like it would just be a friendly thing.” matt speaks fast, stumbling over his words
“you actually want me to..?”
matt nods shyly, his cheeks now a deep red.
“it won’t matter afterwards- it’s just purely so you’re not a virgin anymore?” i clarify,
matt nods again, “yes- no strings attatched..”
i take a deep breath, “you’re sure?”
matt speaks, “i am, i’m sorry-“
i furrow my eyebrows, “don’t be sorry, i’m glad you trust me.”
matt nods again.
i grab his chin, “just follow my lead baby.”
matt’s eyes widen, a small smirk forming at the corner of his mouth.
i press my lips to his softly, a small gasp escaping his mouth.
our lips slot together perfectly, my nose brushed against his as i tilt my head to the right.
i run my hands up the back of his neck to the back of his hair, tugging loosely at the strands.
matt’s hands are practically glued by his sides, i grin as i grab his wrists, placing his hands on the curve of my waist.
i slowly dip my tongue inside his mouth,
although matt said he’d never made out before, it doesn’t seem like it, he’s impossibly good.
matt sits up on his knees, the matress dips beneath his weight.
i scoot closer to him, the wet sounds of our lips smacking together fill the silent room.
i slowly pull away to catch my breath, our panting loud and heavy.
matt has a different look in his eyes, more needy but dominant, he wants more.
he grabs the back of my neck and tugs me closer to him, colliding our lips again.
“you’re good at this.” i mutter against his raw lips, a smile tugging at his mouth.
“no i’m not.” he mumbles, his face inches away from mine.
“you definitely are.” i say softly,
i crawl onto his lap, he grabs my jaw and pulls me back into him.
our tongues fight for dominance, i clearly seem to be winning.
i can tell matt enjoys this, enjoys me being in full control.
i pull away again, “matt- should we start?” i breathe.
he covers his face, “i’m gonna be so clueless.”
“matt that’s okay, i promise, you said that about kissing and you were fucking good.”
matt’s breathes nervously as i shift on his lap,
“no but i barely know anything about this.. like i know the basics but nothing else and-“ he starts,
i press a finger to his lips, “shh.”
“i’m here to teach you, remember?” i say gently, running my hand through his hair.
he nods, “okay- okay.”
i smile at him reassuringly,
i reach for the hem of my shirt, tugging it up over my head.
matt’s eyes are trained on my lacy black bra, his cheeks instantly blushing
“wanna try take this off?” i say, referencing my bra
matt nods frantically, his hands reach up behind my back and fiddle with the clasp.
after a short amount of time he gently unclasps it, letting it fall fowards on his chest.
he sits up straight against the headboard, me still sat on his lap.
matt’s eyes are fixed on my tits, which are right in his face.
he stares shamelessly, “fuck..”
i feel him growing through his sweatpants, his bulge pressing against my clothed cunt.
“you’re hard?” i whisper, reaching for his waistband.
he nods,
i tug down his waistband to his mid thighs,
“im gonna take these off.” i speak,
matt whines softly, “okay- okay.”
i tug down his boxers, his erection springing out.
holy shit.
“not to boost your ego or anything but that’s big matt.” i tell him,
matt lets out a breathless laugh, “stop that..”
“have you ever had a blowjob?” i ask, knowing the answer already.
“no- no! i told you..” he replies, his tone whiny and embarrassed.
i grin, getting off his lap and sitting between his thighs,
i lay between his thighs, propped up on my elbows as his dick is inches away from my face.
i kitten lick his tip, a sharp gasp escaping matt’s mouth.
he bucks his hips up instantly,
“you’re so sensitive.”
matt breathes heavily,
i wrap my lips around his tip, taking the head of his cock in my mouth.
“ohh- oh my god..” matt groans, covering his face with his large hands.
i swirl my tongue around his tip, before taking more of him down my throat.
“fuck- fuck oh god-!” matt whimpers,
i instinctively clench as i hear his whimper, it was so fucking hot.
i look up at him through my eyelashes, his framed glasses sit ontop of his light blue eyes, which are now scrunched shut.
his glasses have always turned me on, it makes him seem more innocent.
matt clutches his bedsheets,
he gasp as i continue to take him down my throat.
i suddenly pull off of him, matt’s eyes opening slowly.
“don’t stop please.” he mumbles, his hands shaking lightly.
“i don’t want you to cum yet, you’ll be all overstimulated if you do.” i tell him,
i crawl back up onto his lap, sitting on his thighs.
matt’s dick rests against his stomach, still fully hard
i tug his shirt off over his head, “you’re sweating.” i laugh.
“how could i not i mean- you’ve just left me fully hard here and-!” matt complains,
i press a finger to his lips, “shh sh.”
he whines, “i want you so bad.”
“you want my pussy?” i ask, playing with the ties of my shorts.
matt nods frantically,
i sit up slightly to tug my shorts off,
matt stares down at me, still sat happily on his upper thighs.
he looks at my black lacy panties, which match the bra i had on.
he shyly reaches down, dragging his cold finger over the fabric of my panties, just lightly grazing my clit.
“please- please.” matt sighs,
i smile, tugging my panties to the side.
matt throws his head back as i’m revealed to him, clearly overwhelmed.
“i can’t- i need you right now.”
i grin, hovering myself above his tip.
“can you- can you be on top, like in charge.” matt asks shyly,
“yeah, of course i can.” i say,
“you ready?” i follow up,
“yes- yes.”
i slowly sink down onto his tip, both of our gasps filling the room.
matt’s dick almost instantly twitches inside of me.
his cheeks go a deep shade of red.
i sink further down on his length, matt arches his back off the bed. a small cry escaping his mouth.
“you- oh my- that feels so good-“ matt babbles,
i fully bottom out on him, sitting comfortably as i try to adjust to his girth.
matt lets out ragged breathes,
he reaches up and grabs my waist, the same thing i taught him to do while we were making out earlier.
i start to slowly drag myself back up his cock, almost pulling out then dropping back down again. i position his hands to my ass.
he sinks his fingers into the plush of my ass as he try’s to contain himself.
“y-you can make noises,” i assure him,
his lips are pursed in a thin straight line, which he instantly stops doing as soon as i tell him not to.
he lets out a well needed moan, his voice cracking.
“you- you usually guide the girl up and down your dick.” i say, still sticking to the ‘teacher’ label that he wanted me to do.
overall, this is just for me to teach him.. right?
matt helps me, pulling me up and down on his length,
“please- please i need to cum.” matt whimpers breathlessly,
“you can hold it.” i say,
i start to pick up the pace, bouncing harder, and faster on him.
his tip kisses my cervix, each vein fills me up so much.
he starts to squirm, his glasses fall off his face onto his chest.
i grab his glasses, without thinking putting them on me.
matt stares at me, instantly letting out a guttural moan at the sight.
“i can’t- please let me cum- please!” matt raises his voice, his voice high pitched and whiny
“i need to! i need to fuck!” matt rambles, his voice breaking as he sinks his fingers further into my sss.
“you- you can cum-“ i tell him,
matt lets out a high pitched whimper as he finishes.
he coats my inside with his release, his abs tensing and his eyes scrunching shut.
i let my head tip back, his glasses shifting up my nose.
i clench around his sensitive cock before orgasming aswell,
“matt!!” i squeal,
i slowly start to come down from the orgasm, gently lifting myself off his dick.
matt lays in the sheets, his body trembling.
i lay foward on his chest, pulling his glasses off of my face and putting them back on his.
he smiles softly, his eyes shut and beads of sweat on his forehead.
he pants heavily into my ear as i lay ontop of him.
a comfortable silence fills the room, accompanied sounds of our heavy breathing.
matt breaks the silence after a second.
“that glasses thing- was so hot.” he sighs, reffering to me riding him with his own glasses on.
i smile, chuckling softly into his shoulder.
matt speaks up again.
“um- i know we said it was a one time thing but.. do you maybe think we could maybe do it again tomorrow.. just so you know- you could teach me more..?”
“i could make that happen.”
-
@downbad4reid
sturnsdoll @obvisturns @stupid4sturniolo @meerkatzthings @witchofthehour @rosalierenee43 @gabrielle-brun1 @ilovemymannnnnnnn @sturnioloxlver @buckys-goodgirl @sturniol0s@ilovemymannnnnnnn @chr1sgirl4life @luanetaluenta @sturnsssbow @mattfangirl @luvr4miya @luvtay111 @lolasturniolo @freshloveforthefit @ruedowney @lovingchrissposts @333michelle @h3arts4harry @jamiesturniolo @chrisstopherfilmed @itzdarling @ @daddyslilchickenfingers2 @ev3rgreenxtrees @certifiednatelover @solarsturniolo @mattsenthusiast @yomamaslays4lyfe @peachmels @alinaa131 @pepsiluvr0209 @creamoncreamoncream2 @szobofc @mattscoquette @blahbell668 @sturniolo04 @bitchydragonparadise @sturni0l0 @ratatioulle @sturnsfav @mattsonly @justalittle47 @sunsetsturniolos
@sturniolo04 @similartokayyz @sturnsintrouble @ilovemattsturn @raysmayhem-72 @75sturn @sturniol0s @secret-sturniolo @hfkeclnendmwodne @sturniolosass @gxldenlush @stonermattsgf @101sara @beccaluvschris @oliviasturniolo21 @imwetforyourmom @tylerstacobell @sunsetsturniolos @aliceloveschris @jayz4dayz4 @sassysturniolo2008 @nyktoxs-lover @nathandoesgf @starsturns234 @chrissturnsss s @joemamaaa42069 @sturnthepot @zayyluvz @realuvrrr @livialifesblog @sturnioloblogs @riowritesitall @raysmayhem-72
2K notes · View notes