#it adds a lot to my understanding of the story thus far

[nekhcore]

beat the coils of bahamut this morning! we managed do duo all of them except T7-9 (though we'll probably be going back to redo T9 by ourselves)

[tabithatwo]

are we ready to talk about shauna's barely hidden but somehow very ignored psychosis and how it, like a ton of her other qualities, is brushed aside by both those around her and the audience? like, i think its clear that a central focus of the show is the way lottie is the only one who got stuck in a facility (and natalie in and out of rehab being the next closest to reckoning with her shit) when the rest of them are very clearly not okay. as a certified Crazy Girl, i've been weary of how they'll handle lottie's story line (blurring psychosis and the supernatural is a very delicate and tricky thing and thus far i've been sort of just waiting to see where it goes). our data on and understanding of mental health is incredibly limited for a lot of reasons (but that's a rant for another time) but there is a large mainstream misconception of when hallucinations and delusions can happen. psychosis isn't just something that happens in schizophrenia and its very complex, so if you want to learn more there's plenty of info out there i'm not going to get into it here, but it happens in a lot of other cases. psychosis is, most simply put, a loss of contact with external reality. ptsd can cause psychosis, especially auditory and visual hallucinations.

so shauna is shown to have these experiences and i didn't realize that they were being so heavily overlooked by a large amount of people until the reaction to the scene where she beats lottie nearly to death. shauna is introduced in s1 as having hallucinations of jackie 25 years later. she is shown to disassociate. in 207, she both holds the baby's body and believes the delusion that they ate the baby. the episode shows her fighting the delusion until she can't anymore. meanwhile, adult shauna tells lottie she keeps callie at arms length out of "fear that she would die...i guess? or maybe that she was never even...real to begin with." then she adds "i think something is broken, lottie." implied: she's broken. something is wrong with her. this is the is the most honest about her mental state we've ever seen shauna be.

why? because lottie has always been and likely will always be perceived as crazier. lottie is the one they pin it on, lottie is the cult leader both then and now, lottie is the scapegoat, lottie is the one who got sent to switzerland. i think there's something to be said for the effect lottie has on people (again, a whole other post) but honestly, that alone is enough. shauna is feeling vulnerable for a lot of reasons and she can tell lottie that she thinks she's crazy, that she's never quite sure her daughter exists, that she's constantly afraid she'll die to the degree that she doesn't let herself interact with her in a real, tangible way, because it's always safer to tell the crazy girl you're crazy, too.

and lottie knows. shauna knows that. lottie clocked her psychosis almost immediately, when she was in the meat shed for all hours. the other girls were shocked by the makeup, and their shock was so fucking strange to me when i watched it, but now on reflecting i'm realizing maybe its the lottie effect. like, have i done the shit shauna has? abso-fucking-lutely not lol. but does my mind work in a way where i immediately would assume shauna was doing something along the lines of the shit she was doing out there, because to me its like...what else would it be? yeah. like sees like, in a way. lottie knows what this looks like at baseline, even if its coming out way different in shauna. even if in shauna it looks like aggression and violence a lot of the time. lottie gets it.

jeff doesn't get it, he thinks strawberry lube is too wild. taissa gets it to a degree, and we see shauna be the second most open with her, but tai suppresses and hides it a degree that she wouldn't dare step foot in a therapist's office (this is yet another thing that makes me crazy but is a whole other post lol). shauna's main goal in this life she's created is pretending to be normal. and she's like, impressively bad at it. but people let her, because what else are they going to do? addressing the clear issues is taboo, because we categorize people so heavily. she masks better than lottie, but it's fucking wafer thin. you see this when she interacts with people who aren't her family or the other yjs. the way she speaks to the taylors? to adam? shauna is only sometimes masking passably when she's in her set world, where she has a routine, and is surrounded by people she only has to half-convince of her sanity.

if shauna is honest about the level of psychosis she experiences, she knows she'll end up like lottie. and i think there's an argument to be made that the people around her (which at this point in her life is pretty much just jeff because she's done another common thing and insulated herself from other people, re: the way she behaves being clockably off to others who won't overlook certain things or can't relate) understand that too. it can't be addressed, because then in their minds there must be action of some kind if it is. (taissa yelling you're acting crazy, shauna is one of the most purely terrified moments we see of her in relation to shauna, because she knows she's admitting something. jeff yelling something to the same effect after the carjacking, same thing.)

the person we see try to get shauna to open up about it is callie. her teenage daughter, who bares the brunt of her difficulty maintaining reality, (who knows that shauna has never accepted her fully as her child, and seems to actually sense that there is a deeper reason for that), asks her to open up. she tells her after the club scene that she knows something is wrong. she even mentions jackie directly. she spends all of s2 trying to relate to shauna, to get her to be open with her about everything. there's no way shauna's trauma and psychosis and general issues have gone unnoticed by callie. daughters always know. they see it in their mothers before they even have a concept of the world. so we're watching a 16 year old try to get her mom to open up, because she doesn't understand fully why that's so dangerous to shauna. to callie, it may even be a secret she thinks other people are in on that she's being left out of. i think maybe she's realizing that it isn't personal and that shauna is guarded like this in general, and we're watching that happen.

callie is learning to care for and relate to her mother and she doesn't see why shauna won't let her in, because to her it's an innate truth that she'll be by her side no matter what (if only she'd let her be). she has unconditional love for her mother and that is the scariest thing in the world to shauna, because the last person who had unconditional love for shauna died because shauna didn't know what to do with it. a baby she never got a chance to meet in reality could've replaced the love that jackie gave her, and shauna was maybe starting to look forward to that, but that ended before it began. so twice shauna has killed that figure in her life. the one who loves her wholly and for who she is, which is terrifying to shauna in it's own right (she tried to take that away from jackie in their last moments, maybe you never really knew me, because that would be easier. shauna can't handle someone really knowing her because she can't handle really knowing herself because, again, that means addressing things that go unaddressed). and she doesn't plan on killing that figure again.

(if callie's even real, because the baby wasn't real when she met him and jackie wasn't real every time she's talked to her in the last twenty-five years, so who the fuck is to say callie is real?)

[lu-is-not-ok]

Any particular thoughts on Fanghunt Hong Lu?

Yes, one very specific thought in fact.

Fanghunt Hong Lu is the most violent Hong Lu ID we have had thus far, being one that not only revels in violence like Tingtang Hong Lu or Hook Hong Lu, but also one that is actively shown torturing his victims in some genuinely stomach churning ways.

He is also the one Hong Lu ID which, while mentioning his Family, is one that doubts the very nature of what a family even is the most clearly.

This, to me, highlights a very noticeable pattern among Hong Lu's IDs.

When a Hong Lu ID is shown to be actively under his Family's control, he's either completely uninterested in violence (such as Liu) or so bored with the role he's forced into that violence is the only way he's able to push back against that boredom (K Corp and W Corp).

On the other hand, a Hong Lu ID that seems to be heavily disconnected from his Family is often one that is actively enjoying the violence he inflicts and is notably kind of fucking unhinged (Tingtang and Hook).

Fanghunt Hong Lu adds another nuance to that spectrum, being an ID that still has contact with his Family, but one who isn't specifically in a position chosen by them and who is led to doubting what a family even is by his experiences.

He shows us a possible outcome of a Hong Lu who has to actually reckon with reality and doubt what he knows about his circumstances, and the results are not pretty. After all, like I said earlier, Fanghunt Hong Lu is the most violent and most hate-filled Hong Lu we've seen up to now. He pulls out a guy's fucking teeth one by one for fuck's sake.

...And this made me think a bit. We actually have quite a few Hong Lu IDs with a Wrath Sin Affinity by now. However, Fanghunt Hong Lu is only the second we have with a Wrath Skill 3. The other one being, of course, Liu Hong Lu.

Both Hong Lu IDs with a Wrath Skill 3 seem to be to some extent aware of something being wrong regarding their Family, in very different ways that lead them into reacting to it very differently.

Liu Hong Lu seems to be aware of the fact he has no real control over what happens when he's under his Family's watchful eye, leading him into being the least violent Hong Lu of them all. He's aware of what his Family is doing to him, but he's unaware of it being abnormal.

On the other hand, Fanghunt Hong Lu seems to be unaware of the specific horrors of his Family. Rather, he's become aware that Family itself is a concept that he can't quite understand. He's seen Bloodfiends who abandon their previous families to be with their new Bloodfiend families, and it's a point of focus for him. What even is a real family?

...This, I think, is where Liu and Fanghunt Hong Lu differ the most. Liu Hong Lu knows he's being hurt, but he doesn't see any way out, that it's just how things are supposed to be, so he simply tries to live through it.

Meanwhile, though Fanghunt Hong Lu doesn't have that piece of the puzzle, he does have a different one - the seed of an idea that he could escape. Proof that one's "Real" Family doesn't have to remain their only family. He just doesn't yet realize what he'd want to escape from, so he channels the feelings he's experiencing because of that information against the immediate source of it. Instead of using that idea to free himself, he directs his anger towards those that actually tried it and succeeded.

I don't mean to keep pushing my "Hong Lu will go apeshit in Canto 8" idea, but like... The more info we get about him, the more likely that possibility becomes. After all, Fanghunt Hong Lu is a clear example of the fact that a Hong Lu aware of an escape route from one's Family could become extremely violent. That added onto the potential of Lorenzo's story told by the Priest being a parallel to Hong Lu, and the fact that the Sapling of Light Hong Lu is likely going to parallel is Chesed... It's all a lot.

[wyverndreamers]

WARNING for extensive talk about the dsmp and the characters in it !! THIS HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH CC'S THIS IS PURELY STORY BABBLE

loving the dsmp revival going on rn (maybe it's only on twt but i don't post on twt, so sorry for dsmp posting on this account) but i really don't like how a lot of the 'revival' is bringing back a lot of c!tommy's mischaracterization as a whole. i can understand the URGE to smooth him out, into something malleable and kind of babied, because for a while there he was just seen as this really annoying character in fandom spaces pertaining to the dsmp, but i see this urge around the internet to turn tommy into a 'perfect victim' with his trauma when that's just not true at all. i say this as a c!tommy enjoyer, i used to watch his pov's RELIGIOUSLY and i say this as someone who has an appreciation for his story and hate to see it cheapened by this constantly crying, blue sweater wearing blonde baby i see on my TL a lot. apart of what made c!tommy compelling is that at certain points he was very petty, and abrasive. he would act on impulse, and not always in a good way. a lot of the time, yeah it did good in the long run, but in the moment a lot of the stuff he does are stupid impulsive decisions that could've ended in FAR worse scenarios. people really like to hold up his trait of loyalty but completely ignore that his loyalty to a fault always came with a subtle sense of ENTITLEMENT that they were supposed to do right, because he was following him, kind of like how a child would be mortified seeing their parents doing something socially wrong like yelling at someone else. and a lot of people in the fandom actually LIKE this aspect of his character, but mostly because it can add to their characterization of him that is of inherent helplessness and childishness. and its usually painted as a good, pure trait to have, fully ignoring how a lot of his childishness is actually willful ignorance- especially in the face of his actions and how they'll effect people around them. he might bend eventually and mutter out a sorry, but that's not something he really WANTS to do. tommy is someone usually fully fixed in his own perspective and you can especially see it in the way that almost every other character at some point gets irritated at him FOR this in certain places in the narrative. and a lot of people would actually have you believe this is a good thing, because they actually view tommy as always having a perfect perspective on everything all the time. they think because he's the closest thing we have to a 'morally correct protagonist' that he is inherently morally correct and thus should be worshipped like the next messiah that will lead the revolution against the evil-doers. except, tommy just does not have that inherently morally correct perspective. yes he wants to do right, but his sense of 'right' is not always what is 'good'. bro literally tipped the initial domino that led to Doomsday happening, and that's not to say that anything that happened because of him burning down George's house was his fault (quite the opposite) but he also knowingly burnt down George's house knowing that George was friends with Dream, and having the full knowledge of what they could do at least to the extent of the L'manberg revolution where they literally had a traitor on the in betray them all. he recklessly incited George's (and again by proxy, Dream's) wrath because he did a reckless action. it's okay to call this behavior reckless and brash guys, that doesn't mean you're saying he deserved to be exiled. i could go on, but again i say this as an enjoyer of the c!tommy storyline and arcs he goes through. i just don't appreciate it when the thing that made his character so compelling, is cheapened down because the fandom cannot fathom the idea of liking a character that responds in complex ways to complex traumas. maybe some people relate too hard, IDK i just don't understand how you can praise a character for being human and then take out everything that MAKES the character feel so human sorry if this wasnt constructive or coherent, i didn't beta read my tumblr post

[emkini]

WELL my best bro and I watched the first episode of the live action A:TLA series and suffice to say we will not be watching any more of them (except maybe if I want to torture myself writing a full comparison analysis).

The writing is atrocious and I felt no emotional punch from any of the scenes. This show wants to be Game of Thrones and is failing— aside from action scenes there is little to no attempt at crafting interesting shots. Aside from the very first opening scene there are zero creative changes to the story that actually improve it or even add interest, and somehow the pacing is so off that even with a whole hour of runtime it still feels rushed. I get the distinct impression that this show is more worried about being a new, crowd-pleasing take on the original than about being faithful to the original's themes and characterization.

Speaking of characterization, it leaves a lot to be desired. Now I'm not going to be too hard on the younger actors, because they are children and they're not doing a bad job for their age. Most of the actors so far do also seem to have made a decent attempt at understanding their roles, but in some cases they....absolutely failed. Iroh immediately comes to mind– he feels exceptionally callous thus far and ironically his bright and dismissive encouragement of Zuko's firebending is the most egregious example. Iroh in the original show is established early on to have depth and steel to his kindness and his reprimands of Zuko have a consistent undertone of care. This Iroh is a military general who doesn't want to be here and occasionally puts on a forced kind uncle veneer that feels more jarring than authentic. Honestly Sokka is the only character so far who has captured ANY of the original charm for me and even he's been so watered down it's laughable.

The CGI isn't....horrendous, I guess, but it's terribly overused. Bending has no subtlety and is only used for shows of skill or power. There are some impressive landscapes and locations, but a lack of atmosphere and even just good cinematography does them no favors. Wolf Cove especially feels so oddly sterile for what's supposed to be quite a small, close-knit society that I couldn't like it nearly as much as I wanted to. GranGran's exposition scene made me want to pull my hair out for how badly it was done.

In summary, the first episode was downright offensive to my personal sensibilities and I have a feeling it's not going to get better. On the upside, however, when we watched the first episode of the original show it really highlighted jut how spectacularly done it was. In just 20 minutes you get a perfect feel for the characters, something the live action couldn't seem to do even with triple the runtime.

Also Zuko's scar is just face paint and I, as an eye horror enthusiast, am extremely mad about that.

[crooked-wasteland]

I just saw your essay on the codependency of FizzOzzie and it cleared up a lot of things I've been thinking about this ship and to be honest, I myself thought it was the most healthiest ship in the whole show even better than the trash that Stoliz is but well... (btw, I was trying to scroll through tumblr to find it but can you just link it for me so I coud read it again)?

It also brings me to an idea of the possibility brung up in two fics each with different ideas:

#1 if Hazbin's events every leak in Helluva's since they're the same universe, there's a possibility that Lucifer would want to have precautionary heirs for the defense of Hell and outright force Ozzie and any other relationships with lowerclass apart since it's "not compatible with angelic DNA" or some thing, so Ozzie could in fact leave Fizz because of his status

#2 Ozzie getting tired of Fizz... Ozzie is the sin of Lust after all and Lust can be ever-changing and capricious in its nature as a sin. Ozzie’s character, embodying Lust, might lead to a fluctuating commitment level, influencing his interactions and relationships. In biblical lore, he did end up causing a lot of sinful things like fucking a human named Sarah or so I remember?

Again this is the same guy who humiliated Blitzø in Ozzie, S2 just rewrote him completely (btw, in my rewrite I'mma change him to be more evil and instead give the whole "lovey-dovey Sin" idea to Satan who is female and thinks Asmodeu's "fake-love" is like a slap in the fact to her idea of realistic and true romance)

I'd just feel like Fizz would be better off with Blitzø tbh or Striker or all in a threesome... the possibilities are endless, and why is the show making love seem too fairytale and unrealistic?! Like Blitzø shouldn't have to fuck Stolas just because he was his arranged playmate for just one day??? The show did the childhood friends trope dirty and would be better if Stoliz was a thing until mid-teens broke up for [insert reason] and reconnect but honestly, Stolas should've had his own seperate season/arc dedicared to himself if HB was an anthology show

Also the fact that Asmodeus couldn't just burn the contract, one-shot the lawyer and go on a rampage to save Fizz is just beyond me... the Sins are supposed to be these scary demon lords so why aren't they, hm?

Sorry for rambling and what do you think or want to add?

Absolutely here you go.

The consistent failure of Vivziepop is to commit to a mature story. She describes her own protagonists as "Deeply flawed but understandably traumatized people who just need love to fix them" while the villains of her shows are "irredeemable" (and women, but that's a tangent).

I mentioned before that trying to use the excuse of the setting being Hell and playing that out to the logical conclusion would end up exactly like Good Omens. The whole moral of said show being that imperfect humanity is worth saving, that life is worthy and beautiful for its own sake of existence. That is why the story of Good Omens uses the Bible, angels, and demons to tell it's story, to make that point.

Why is Helluva Boss/Hazbin Hotel set in Hell? What is being said by the plot, themes and story? So far we have that demons are better people than the Angels in Hazbin. That sacrifice is the only virtue worthy of redemption and thus reinforces backwards Christian ideals of penance.

Personally, I would have made Hell less absurd. Less a place of debauchery and chaos and more a mere continuation of life. We see in the Hazbin Pilot a character falls from the sky and says "I'm alive?" Before being hot by Travis' car. The point being that people just transition from one life to the next and in that they keep living life the way they always have.

My personal criticisms of the series' use of Hell is that it established this idea that people only behave if they have a god to fear. Once in Hell, there is no salvation, so why bother. It's like a Christian asking an atheist why they wouldn't commit murder if they don't believe in God. The answer is that people like order and security. People dying would seek to maintain their status quo from life. A lack of salvation wouldn't change that for them.

And frankly, I wouldn't have redemption be a thing. This story and its messages are actively devalued by the act of redeeming sinners when the Angels are just the same as them. By having Hell just be a warped continuation of life on Earth, it makes the message more universal: Life is Hell. Life is suffering in a way Hell can never hope to be. Physical anguish and torment for all eternity can never amount to the pain of the fleeting and the terror of change and uncertainty.

I would have made it impossible to be redeemed because the fact is, regardless what you believe happens after death, what we know we have is life. We fear death so much we have created salvation throughout history, the wish to keep living forever in some way. But, especially for young people, life is harder now than ever before. It's more terrifying and uncertain and cruel and uncaring.

So if life is Hell, how do you be happy?

That would have been my thesis for the show. The message underneath is all about finding happiness in the absence of salvation. Even the idea that maybe salvation is something we should reject to really feel what it means to be alive. Giving up on our deaths and seeking our own fulfillment, and in that finding community, love, and hope. To see true humanity as something selfish and kind at the same time.

That's how I would have taken the concept.

[amerricanartwork]

Quetzalli on Trafficlights and Birds

Well @toxictoxicities, it has been done! You gave me the chance for me to give my own interpretation on this matter, and I can’t resist chances to add some narrative significance! I decided to make a separate post on it because what I came up with ended up being long (as always with me), and in case anyone else would enjoy these thoughts.

However before I go in with this essay I've put together I have to give a very important note: These thoughts are gonna be primarily based around my personal interpretations and headcanons for Seven Red Suns and No Significant Harassment. I’m generally a person who needs to know exactly what I’m working with to do something well, and as such my ideas about metaphors, symbolism, and greater narrative significance typically depend a lot on me understanding the characters and ship not just in their general dynamic, but various other deeper elements — what their core desires/fears are, what their backstories/histories are, each of their main character traits and why they are that way, then from there what they see in each other and why their relationship benefits each other in-universe, and what other effect(s) the relationship has or could have on the characters in-universe as well as the greater narrative out-of-universe, with the additional optional knowledge of what the main plot of the story they come from is to possibly tie in important moments. Seeing as you probably aren’t going to explain your Trafficlights interpretation completely to this intense of a degree anytime soon (though I’d absolutely enjoy hearing it whenever it comes!), if I’m going to make some metaphors I think the best option is to just use my current character interpretations so I have this background familiarity, especially since I’ve actually been developing these things a whole lot for my own iterator off-the-string happy ending AU!

Also, I want to say to that if some of these idea sound familiar, it’s because I realized I can actually project some of my previous Lilypad ideas onto this Trafficlights portrayal as well. I feel my Suns and Moon are similar enough in their personality traits that many of the same dynamics and significance could reasonably apply. In fact Tox, I’m gonna admit I actually did take some inspiration for my Lilypad portrayal from seeing your particular Trafficlights and drawing my own conclusions about how that dynamic worked, and overall my depiction of Seven Red Suns is largely inspired by your own take on that character, which I found quite unique compared to the rest of the fandom for being the first one I saw to show Suns as being far less imposing and confident internally than they seem in public. So I guess I am once again coming full circle now!

I think this is already more than enough words, but I just felt the need to give those prefaces as context for all of these ideas. With that being said, I hope you like at least some of these!

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Option 1: Birds as Freedom

From what I’ve read, a common symbolism for birds is freedom, which to me is easy to see because of their signature flight ability. Flight can be considered the mode of travel with the greatest freedom because it’s not restricted by landmasses (or even planets, if you include space travel), and because flying is literally defying, or “freeing oneself” from gravity, one can easily associate it with weightlessness and thus being carefree and without worries or negativity.

With any off-the-string iterator story, it’s easy to give going off-the-string a positive significance because it’s literally the puppet “freeing itself” from the limited confines of their chamber, and by extent the limits imposed upon them by the Ancients. This is further supported by how some iterators in canon do appear to perceive their cans as a limitation or cage, as evidenced by the broadcast dialogue. In fact, I've heard No Significant Harassment is one of these very iterators, so I imagine he’d absolutely want to go off-the-string so long as he has a good incentive to. 

To relate this back to birds, you could very much use a caged songbird as a metaphor for the iterators; beautiful, brightly-colored creatures “raised” in captivity and trapped in boxes to serve other people, once “singing” out their ideas from within to those people, but now just giving those “songs” to each other. Thus, going off-the-string (perhaps to the Emergence facility in your AU) could be seen as these “birds” finally flying free to be with one another “in the wild”, finally able to fly and live their lives more fully as they were denied for so long. So regardless of any other symbolism, Trafficlights — and any other off-the-string iterator ship by extent — leaving their cans could be seen as them “flying free” together from the restraints forced upon them.

However, I’ve also recently realized another freedom symbolism besides freedom from the Ancients’ restrictions, and that’s freedom from their own. This is something more impactful to my Seven Red Suns, who like Moon, is also someone who hides a lot of his true personality for a more polite, proper, and dignified public persona, shoulders a lot of weight he isn’t always able to handle alone, and puts lots of limits on himself and what he’s “allowed” or “supposed” to do, albeit for entirely different reasons. Now contrast that with Sig, who although he also hides a lot of his true feelings and knows when to dial it down, is someone who is a master at breaking rules and going against convention. In fact, I like to imagine it’s literally in his nature (er, programming) to think outside the box, generating all sorts of different ideas to solve problems that don’t always totally follow outside rules or what’s “typical” for using a certain item. 

When you bring these two together, I imagine Sig could absolutely be the one to encourage Suns to let loose more, letting down his proper and and uptight persona to show more of his emotional side and explore things he didn’t allow himself to before (like I said, this is one of the ideas that works with Trafficlights as well as Lilypad)! It’s as if Suns is a bird too used to living in the cage and afraid to truly fly again, and Sig has to coax him out into embracing that freedom. You could even take this with the idea of iterators not being used to romance, a restriction Suns absolutely puts on himself and even others because he believes a “proper” iterator isn’t supposed to have such deep attachments, of which romantic love could be considered the worst because it’s both breaking Karma 3 of Companionship and can directly lead to Karma 2 of Sexual Intercourse, so it’s essentially a double-risk. But again, Sig is willing to explore these new feelings, and now that they’re off the string and can love each other more physically and directly than ever, what better time could there be for Suns to “spread his wings” and fly alongside him?

Option 2: Birds as Passion/Romance

To me, the second biggest symbolism that birds can have is that of passion and general romantic ideas. Technically all birds could have this association because feathers and wings in general are pretty showy, so spreading one’s wings could just as easily be a gesture of great emotion and expression as it could be preparing to be free. In addition though, whereas the previous point was more related to songbirds, this seems to correlate more with birds of paradise especially, who have the most colorful and varied plumage of the bird kingdom, thus making it easy to say they’re “showing their true colors” without fear. Some birds of paradise, particularly parrots/parakeets/macaws/etc. are very social creatures by nature, so it’s even easier to draw the connection between their vibrant plumage and social behavior with being expressive and outgoing.

As for the romance element, to me it seems birds are commonly used as such symbols already; there’s doves and swans being symbols of love often included in some way at weddings, words like “lovebirds” referring to lovers as well as one of my favorite words, “twitterpated”, which means to be very smitten and infatuated and also has a clear bird-based association and maybe even origin. But then there’s the idea of songbirds singing to each other, which I think is a particularly romantic idea which plays into one of my favorite shipping tropes I call, “answering the call”. So far, I like to describe it as when someone is looking for companionship and romance for a while, either openly or as a subconscious desire, but is eventually found and “answered” by someone willing to love with them. It’s such a romantic idea to me because it often includes so much loneliness and sometimes even tragedy before, making that moment where they finally find someone all the more sweet!

Okay, now to bring this back to Trafficlights. Starting with the first idea, I think it’s easy to associate Sig with these kinds of birds, especially macaws and such, seeing as I imagine he can be just as “colorful” both literally and personality-wise, and cares deeply about his relationships in a similar manner. But even then, like I mentioned before Sig can sometimes feel like he needs to hide those feelings because others don’t fully understand him and he doesn’t want to risk creating tension (although hiding his feelings like that kinda does anyway). 

To resolve this, I’ve decided to use what I imagine Sig would appreciate and value in Suns that would evolve the relationship past friendship to romance, that being that Suns was one of the first people besides Moon who believed that Sig’s ideas and his dedication to his friends could be something more, something better and used for good. My Suns is defined largely by his perfectionism and endless drive to make things the “best” versions of themselves. In my timeline of events he already helped Sig in that way during a pretty important moment, not to mention it’s just really inspiring how much Suns cares about trying to bring about the “best” for everyone. On Sig’s end, this is how they at least developed a friendship, and in this alternative what would cause that appreciation to evolve to romance eventually. In fact, in my headcanon it was the combined efforts of Moon first understanding Sig’s feelings and Suns helping to perfect his role in his group, with both of them working really hard to help him find new belonging with the Local Group, that was what got Sig out of his “rough patch”. Thus, in a way, Suns directly helped Sig make new connections, “spread his wings”, and “find a new flock”, which can easily be the main reason why Sig would fall for Suns.

Now, what about Suns? Relating him to birds and passion also hinges largely on another pretty crucial headcanon about my Seven Red Suns, which is that he is secretly a huge romantic with a passion for the fine arts. In addition to striving for an “ideal” world at all times, he appreciates art and the deeper symbolism within. However, because of what I said earlier about Suns placing a lot of high standards on himself, he doesn’t actually make art of his own, believing it’s “not an iterator’s place” to do such a thing themselves because it’s not in their purpose. But even then, he can’t help himself from seeing things artistically and drawing his own conclusions about things.

That being said, I imagine Suns could have a strong appreciation for birds in particular; their beauty, combined with their flight, makes them seem as though they’ve already “ascended” on some level above other animals. On top of that, I think Suns would come to see Sig as sort of a bird himself! Maybe a big green macaw with the most beautiful plumes who’s also far more intelligent than others think. But even more so, when it comes to what Suns appreciates in Sig that causes him to fall in love, I imagine it’s how Sig is the only person who sees through his facade for who he really is. Everyone else around him seems to either put him on a pedestal, with their own high expectations to follow, or is intimidated by his grandeur into avoiding much direct contact. Again, however, Sig naturally thinks outside the box and challenging people’s ideas, so it’d be pretty easy for him to break down some of Suns’s diplomacy to show that more emotional side (another idea that I use in Lilypad as well). No Significant Harassment is the one person Suns feels like he can be himself around, helping him realize that even those parts of him he hides make him “perfect” by virtue of being his real and unique self. It’s like Suns is a great eagle, looked up to and feared by other birds as a large bird of prey and thus lonely and pressured to soar above all else, and only the surprisingly smart macaw is able to lower his guard, helping him see he’s just as beautiful and inspiring on the ground as he is soaring high in the clouds. 

And then there’s the idea of “answering the call”. I’ve already seen your Trafficlights will probably play out as a slow burn, with Sig and Suns harboring growing feelings for each other for a while but only really acting on it once Emergence kicks in. In this case the dynamic would be mutual, with both of them longing for a deeper connection, but perhaps not realizing it until this timeline. I imagine Sig would be the one more conscious of this desire though, seeing as he openly seeks connection with others, so it’d be as if he’s a lonely songbird wanting to sing out but never getting an answer. And then of course, when Suns finally does respond it’s that much more poetic!

Trafficlights as Rio (spoilers, by the way)

OKAY HEAR ME OUT, I just have to include some words on this because this movie, this freaking movie is not only one of the two that kickstarted my love of birds but is what started this whole Trafficlights-as-birds-symbolism thing for me.

To give some context, if you don’t already know I am someone who not only loves making metaphors and symbolism with my ships, but loves finding associations between them and outside music or stories. I often look for connections to the old Disney animated fairytales, but I really end up doing it to all sorts of animated stories that I believe have pretty universal themes.

That being said, if there’s any association I’d make for Trafficlights as I currently see them, it’s to Blue Sky’s Rio and some of the scenes from that story. Firstly, Blu as a character already somewhat parallels my Suns in that he’s awkward and not the best at interacting with others. Not to mention his inability to fly, which came from him never getting a chance to embrace his emotions before being captured and taken from his home, could be paralleled to Suns’s bottling up his emotions, especially since flight in that film is directly related to feelings of happiness, love, and freedom, so Suns in a way is also “stunted” in his emotions. Meanwhile Sig on the other hand is more like Jewel, someone who at least understands his emotions a lot better and thus “knows how to fly”, and who resists others’ attempts to cage him and tries to get his partner to do the same. Like Blu Suns refuses at first, his logic and desire for a dignified self image getting the best of him being able to let loose in any environment where he isn’t surrounded by close friends. 

Then there’s the freaking “Hot Wings” scene, which takes the most responsibility for this association of mine. Largely because the two side-characters, Nico and Pedro, also seem to carry a dynamic with their lyrics that just reminds me of Suns and Sig, respectively, a lot (honestly I just thought about it on a whim one day and I can’t unsee it now…). Not to mention the entire scene is about pretty birds dancing, which given you’ve also made a decent number of drawings of Trafficlights dancing together, I think is just super fitting. And then Jewel’s singing once again brings back this idea of freedom and showing one’s emotions and love, with the remaining question being whether or not Blu can eventually unlock this feeling inside him despite his fears and fly up with her. This is something I think could work with Trafficlights, at least how I see them, for even if Suns can be more emotional around Sig and maybe his friends, he still has trouble doing so in public, not always liking the pressure of being “perfect” but not wanting to risk looking like a fool around everyone who looks up to him.

It works even better with one of the later scenes in the film when Blu and Jewel finally manage to cut the chain keeping them together, which causes Jewel to immediately lift into the sky with the pure joy and euphoria of once again being free to fly as she pleases. However, Blu is left looking up at her as she flies with their friends, and you can tell he’s both realizing again just how beautiful she is and longing so much to join her in the sky, yet still unable to fly. Once again I can’t help seeing Suns in Blu’s place, looking at Sig having fun and being so carefree, loving the feeling of being off-the-string, and him thinking Sig so beautiful and wanting to join him too. And eventually, just like Blu does in a true “answering the call fashion”, he is able to “spread his wings” and they finally can fly away together!

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Okay, I think that’s all I have to say for now on this topic. This essay, excluding the preface at the beginning, is 2498 words! I think that might be a little bit more than my Lilypad essay! I really hope it delivered!

But even then, this was so fun to do! Even though Trafficlights isn’t my main ship and isn’t going to happen in my own AU, I’ve recently been looking to better figure out Sig and Suns’s relationship anyway to understand why they’re at least friends with each other. Of course there are some other factors in their relationship, some of which I’ve edited out for the sake of these ideas because it throws a bit of tension in the dynamic that could compromise its ability to work as a ship, but this was still an important aspect and I’m glad to have gotten a chance to develop it! And then of course, a reason to think about ships as well as shamelessly plug one of my favorite movies ever is also very nice!

This may all sound super silly and maybe none of it works with your Emergence Trafficlights, but regardless this was seriously such a fun opportunity, and I’m glad you gave me a reason to do this! I would love to hear your thoughts on or additions to all this, if you can!

[myrtlesandasphodels]

Okay, I don't really talk here, but I feel like there's something that needs to be said.

There's been a lot of discussion lately about whether or not the recent EW photoshoot with Emma D'arcy and Olivia Cooke is queerbait. And, unfortunately, I'm here to tell you that, based on the evidence we have so far, it absolutely is.

I've heard two major points arguing it isn't. First, that these are two real people and real people cannot queerbait, and I'm sorry but we're not talking about two everyday people living their everyday lives. These are two actors doing a photoshoot to PROMOTE a show. The marketing team probably approved this. It's part of a marketing campaign.

The second argument I've heard is that the queerness is subtextual and therefore House of the Dragon is not baiting queer audiences, because there is queer content in the actual show. Now, we can chase our own tails forever about what constitutes subtext, but the point is that it's very subjective. I, personally, agree that Alicent and Rhaenyra's relationship cannot be read in any way other than through queer lenses, and the fact that the casting director chose at least two queer actors to portray them adds to this reading, much to the credit of the HOTD team. However, there are many people who don't see it that way.

The largely cis and heterosexual audience is not perceiving Rhaenyra and Alicent as queer. What's more, the majority of people watching this show do not read press releases and actor interviews, therefore have no clue that the writers and actors have commented on Rhaenicent having a queer undertone. This is not an explicit textual representation of a wlw relationship.

For the record, I think that's okay. Not every story needs to be out and proud, so to say. As a matter of fact, it would bother me very much if the show started using anachronistic terms to describe the characters' experiences. But the point I'm trying to make is that as long as the queerness remains subtextual, the wider audience will not be aware of it, and thus the only people who will understand it for what it is are the same people this marketing campaign is intended for: queer people.

This is not an indictment of any sort. I've publicly stated a few days ago that this will not stop me or anyone else from shipping Rhaenicent. Actually, I'm enjoying the content we're getting very much (my phone wallpaper is currently an image from said interview), but not acknowledging that this is what is happening feels dishonest.

[allmannerofmalady]

DATV/: Thoughts after first 10 hours of playing

So. Many. Thoughts. With the caveat that I love the first 3 games and have been playing for years, and the storylines mean a lot to me.

I was really disappointed the day before launch because of spoilers I had seen, and it really dampened my excitement. BUT I’ve been enjoying the game much more than expected: specifically the environments and combat. I didn’t give a shit about Rook and was salty over losing the keep, and by an hour in I was growing quite fond of my Rook.

the dialogue writing is not good imho. It’s jarring and stilted at many times, and inconsistent between characters. The usual awkward BioWare quips etc are not the problem - the VO direction seems off? Either super flat or OTT. That being said, I’m playing a female Rook with the British VO and so far I’m enjoying it.

the game is beautiful but the character art style was a choice. I don’t understand why everyone has such big heads and is so squat? I get not committing to a hyper realistic look but WHY these proportions, I don’t understand.

As someone who fell for DA for the lore, the choices, the keep etc - it feels super shallow. And I’m sad about it. I can feel the rush to phase out the old games, and to me PERSONALLY I can’t understand the build up of storylines and cliffhangers that just get disregarded. Why create these casts of characters? Why should I care about the new companions if they just get tossed and recycled with each game? Where’s Fenris 😭

MAJOR SOLAVELLAN SPOILER YOU ARE WARNED - Solas is one of my favourite characters of all time. The Lavellan romance to me was captivating - add to that that I LOVE my Inquisitor and I’m very attached to her and her story. While I’m glad there’s an “good” ending that features both of them - I’m going to purposefully allow my brain to gloss over the details of it and fill the rest with HC because… yeah.

I know all of the reasoning behind justifying the choices of a “soft reboot” and leveling the story for new players but it still burns for me. I played 100s of hours in DAI alone. I bought DLC. I read all the books, art books and comics and survived on a cliffhanger for 10 years (and DA2s cliffhanger before that). It feels cheap to just get some bland dialogue and cameos and call it a day. It’s the fans who have kept the franchise going, idk. It’s not the send off I hoped for and preordered the game for. But I guess I’m glad we got a game at all at this point.

All that said - I will keep playing and enjoying it for what it is. I will enjoy the crumbs of fan service as much as I can (not Isabella’s cameo because wtf). I will finish the game out of love for DA thus far, Solas and my inquisitor. But idk if I see myself replaying this the way I have replayed the first 3 games for years. And I think I’ll need a long DA break after, because it’s going to be really… odd going back to the old games knowing what I know now. But I’ve lined up Metaphor ReFantazio as a palate cleanser :D more thoughts as they come, I guess?

[meldingintheunderdark]

Halsin, fatherhood and his ability to hurt

Unpopular opinion: any post mentioning Halsin having a plethora of biological children makes me feel queasy. And I say this when I hc Sszazar will bear Halsin's kid because the need to raise a far better daughter than Orin for Bhaal, then just to raise a daughter for himself, was the pivotal point in his filial faith as the Dark Urge.

How would Halsin take care of such a huge family? How would he avoid neglecting his children? If the childbearers are present too, how does he communicate with them to co-parent? How would he create a positive environment between his bio kids and the orphans without favoritism?

I know Daddy Halsin is a meme, however the title he loves so dearly is terribly heavy with responsibilities. In my opinion, as Halsin is in game, he will neglect the orphans until he realizes that it's simply impossible to be Daddy Halsin. It may take a day or a week till he's dead tired and ready to abandon the concept of a traditional family with one strong and loving parental figure. Art Cullagh writes on “[...] the children of all ages in Halsin's care”. It seems Halsin is indeed the sole caregiver. Obviously, nine whole wagons of children need far more than Daddy Halsin telling them stories. They need daddies, mommies, guardians, caregivers. They need many adults. The kids who lost their parents also need to grieve. I cannot believe every single child is calling him Daddy as if their parents did not die so recently and/or they don't have any trauma regarding their parents or the concept of a parental figure... or that every single child loves Halsin. Sometimes, personalities just don't match.

So, to add a lot of biological children to these nine whole wagons of kids... I guess I don't like this headcanon because it implies Halsin is downright irresponsible. Bearing and birthing a child are difficult and dangerous. If he's the one with a bun in the oven, it means he's willing to put his body through such an ordeal without reserve, over and over again. Halsin isn’t dumb. He's a healer. He knows firsthand that something natural can maim or kill. He's a druid. He knows the strain people put on nature. I can hardly imagine him spawning kids left and right without a care in the world just because he can.

Nine whole wagons of children... It’s already so many orphans. Hence my belief he will neglect them at first, overjoyed as he is to be Daddy Halsin, blinded by his title, but then he will quickly understand he must raise them alongside many other adults and work together as a tight-knit community. He won't be their only dad. Maybe he will feel jealous of the other daddies, wounded even. Maybe he will worry a lot about the quality of his parenting. Maybe he will hardly digest the fact not every kid he saved will love him as a father. Undeniably, caring for the orphans will also make him think about his own family and the pain and joy associated with these bittersweet memories.

Raising children is never easy. I do dislike headcanons describing Halsin and fatherhood as smooth sailing. Perhaps I'm simply an unfunny person entrenched in my own traumas, thus I cannot see Halsin as a wonderful, confident, faultless dad. Furthermore, kids aren't sharing one mind. Like adults, they are extremely different from each other. These kids went through war, abandonment and extreme poverty too. It's unrealistic to imagine they would all adore Halsin or even that living together with so many others won't have any negative consequences whatsoever.

I must admit the way Halsin is represented with this headcanon, and some others, bothers me. He's too perfect. His traumas, depression and grief tend to be acknowledged, but not his ability to hurt people. His actions hurt the Grove and the tieflings deeply. He tries to be good, however he isn't a saint either. He can and does hurt himself and others while attempting to do good. Certainly, it’s completely unintentional when others are involved. Halsin isn’t cruel. He’s a good man at heart, yet he’s flawed.

My English fails me. What I’m trying to say is that Halsin is so often framed in an extremely positive light in game and in the headcanons I read here, especially when the scenarios are about children. I truly understand writing on potentially triggering themes is not a good experience, to say the least. Nevertheless, writing Halsin as a good man who can do no harm to anyone he loves/likes does him a great disservice. He did hurt his druids and the tieflings he sheltered indirectly because he threw himself body and soul into his long-lasting obsession. So self-sacrificing he tends to forget the world around him. Once again, I understand the need to have a comfort character who is soft, caring, hot, who suffers but accepts help from his loved one... and yet, I also don’t.

In the end, the problem is rooted deep in my interpretation of Halsin. The very same lines don’t resonate with me the same way they do with other players, as does everything else in our world. But positive only Halsin is overwhelmingly represented, I honestly wonder if I'm too obtuse. People seem to see hope and joy when he talks about the children whereas all I can see is the damage he will cause temporarily because he’s too eager to realize his dream, too focused on a somewhat traditional family structure with a single parent, too inexperienced. Painful moments before peace and happiness. He doesn’t mention other settlers as caregivers. Moreover, the commune represents such a logistical nightmare. He also runs back to Thaniel’s realm without decompressing or processing his own problems, his new romance in a long while, their life-threatening adventures, etc.

It's the hill I’m willing to die on. Halsin is kind, but he can hurt people. He will neglect the kids because he cannot physically and emotionally cater to their every need. Of course, he will correct his mistakes in a heartbeat. This one-dimensional Halsin shining like a beacon of light in the darkness is dull. It’s so often about his kindness/love in the fandom, sometimes his pain. A person who hurts someone else unintentionally is not instantaneously evil. Halsin is not evil if he hurts the kids because he cannot give each of them enough attention while he is trying to take care of them with all his heart. His ability to hurt gives him depth as much as love, gentleness, selflessness.

Once again, it's all about our personal preferences, I get it. It isn't a big deal. It's merely isolating to have such an important school of thought about Halsin dominating his tags. I would love to read stuff about Halsin frustrated because a teenager keeps running away from the commune. Halsin crying because he can hear a child repeatedly having night terrors. Halsin shouting because he is at his wits’ end, scaring them, then agonizing over his mistake, clueless how to mend things. Halsin having no more libido because fatherhood and the commune are so demanding, and not feeling alright about its absence. Halsin at loss with a kid who isn't like others, unable to interact with them the same way. Halsin distraught that a group of orphans has stopped calling him daddy, then envious because they call another settler daddy. Ashamed of his envy. Halsin being unfair when he thinks he’s being fair. Halsin, who is so modest, too modest, subconsciously teaching the children to be humble, too humble, then realizing they’re becoming their harshest critics, like he is with himself. Trying, sometimes failing, occasionally hurting himself and others, then trying again to be better and do better. The fact he's 350 years old doesn't mean he has nothing to learn anymore. He says so himself.

One can love intensely, strive to be kind, and still hurt people unintentionally. Halsin is no exception.

[nevermoreconfessions]

Prospero is my favorite character for many reasons and one of those is the fact he's from the first work of Edgar Allan Poe I read, therefore it has a special place in my heart. Having said that, his spectre disappoints me, AT THE TIME. It's true I don't know what the authors have in store but thus far, his spectre lacks severely to me. Spoilers for Masque of Red Death ahead, but he's based off of a story where a Prince hides away from a plague that torments his land until that "Red Death" enters the castle and follows him through a series of colored rooms, each one representing different things depending on how you read it. His spectre is not giving me any of that. It's a generic plague doctor with a staff as his most "unique" design choice. It tells me he lived through A plague but it doesn't tell me anything else from him just by looking at it on top of it being the weakest in terms of flare. Even Will's has more flare and that's...saying a lot. I trust that eventually the design might... make more sense to me and it might go through changes but as of right now, it's the most boring to me and that's a shame because I adore Prospero and anything related to him but I couldn't honestly say his Spectre is my favorite when it doesn't even look like anything more than a regular plague doctor... Especially since the staff is easy to miss or just doesn't add much. The rats could be a bonus too, but rats weren't really much of an element in the story either....

PS: I really don't mean this as hate or harsh criticism, it's just an observation and a mild hope someone sheds a new perspective on this that maybe I missed?

Can I call you PoeAnon? I'm calling you PoeAnon.

Oh, PoeAnon. How I love you, because this is what critique looks like. And you know what? I get what you're coming from. In a way, I actually agree.

Dear PoeAnon, here's what Prospero's design and abilities tell me, in regards to who he is and how he died —

Let's start with the whole Plague Doctor thing he's got going on. Personally, I love a good plague doctor, and I do think that the spectre could've used a little extra pizazz; but, here's where that design gets truly interesting —

The rats.

Yes, those damned rats. Let me explain.

It tells a great amount of how he died! Did you know that the Plague was spread by rats (then, fleas)? Apparently, the Catholic church was like, "Deport those cats, they're evil," and rats ran wild, spreading the plague like wildfire — the plague subsequently hit Italy, where Prospero is said to be from.

So, to me, it appears that Prospero died of the Plague in Italy, where he might have worked as a doctor in efforts to treat said plague. Or, he was the patient. (I think he was the patient who either died of the plague, or in surgery.)

To emhasize that he died of the plague, let's talk about the poem for a moment. The "Red Death" is a fictional disease that causes "bleeding at the pores."

Prospero is known to have a fear of blood — he gets queasy seeing his own blood, to be exact. Fits well, right?

I'll admit — I don't really understand the bat wings or the hourglass symbols on his staff.

I'll assume that the hourglass symbolizes death — namely, "running out of time," because getting the plague back then meant that you were counting your days. The bat wings stump me, though I assume it's because bats can carry some pretty serious diseases, too.

All this to say: I do like Prospero's spectre. As I said, I have a soft spot for Plague doctors, though I do understand that desire for more.

I wish I had more to go off of, too. But it's still a neat design, in my opinion! It's a classic, honestly.

What do you think, Nevermore tumblr?

[super-rangers]

Hi there! I come to your ask box to humbly offer some UIW based Rejanis headcannons because they have been rotating in my brain as if they were on the glass turntable of a microwave. I hope you enjoy and I apologize in advance for the length 😅 please add on as you may see fit! thank you for this story!

1. Because the height discrepancy between Regina and Janis is a constant subject of jokes between them, Regina jokingly starts taking those x0.5 lens top-down forehead photos of Janis (the kind that make her look like that one Megamind meme, you know the one) and shows them to her, saying, “This is what it’s like to date you.” The thing that she forgets to consider, however, is that Janis completely leans in to it because that is exactly the brand of goofy humor that she thrives in. And thus begins a growing photo collection in Regina’s phone of just 0.5 photos of Janis, taken at school, every time they go on a date, where ever 😄 (Bonus: on their anniversary, Regina makes two posts. The first, on her main account, is so beautiful and sentimental and more vulnerable than she is usually— a show of how far she’s come and how much more comfortable she’s grown in herself and how much she loves Janis. The other is on her finsta, and it’s just a carousel post of those photos of Janis with the caption, “One year of this POV 🥰🥰🥰”. Janis is comparing them later and says of the finsta post, “You should’ve posted this one on your main instead”

2. In the same vein, Regina sends those Gnometok tiktok videos to Janis (for reference: https://www.tiktok.com/@thefreshestdoug/video/7387230517243972906) along with commentary like, “Oh my goodness, Jan—I had no idea your relatives have had to endure so much 😔”

3. (At the risk of being a little too meta considering the iterations of these characters are based off of the movie musical 😅) in addition to playing the guitar, Janis has a beautiful voice. She really doesn’t think much of it—it’s something she likes to do for herself and is so commonplace for her and done so mindlessly but Regina absolutely loves LOVES to listen to her, even if the singing and humming is near constant sometimes. In fact, and no one knows of this because she knows it’s so disgustingly sappy that she would get super shy and deny it if anyone were to bring it up, but she likes to sometimes ask Janis to sing to her. Of course, Janis always obliges, and has taken particularly to singing her old Hawaiian folksongs or lullabies while they’re cuddling that her mom used to sing to her as a young child. Regina becomes the human embodiment of the “🥹🥰🥹🥰🥹” emojis and melts into a puddle every time

4. As a segway from that last bit, I don’t want to frame this as something that’s remarkable because it’s something that any good partner would and should do, but I am always such a sucker for cultural exchange/learning about and engaging with your partner’s culture as a form of honoring & loving them, and I think that’s something that would be really important to Regina. Like she’ll often ask about customs and she tries her best to commit the little Hawaiian words and phrases she hears Janis and her parents use to memory and even sometimes try to use them too 😄 (her pronunciation is a little off a lot of the time but she’s got the spirit!)

5. As headstrong and stubborn as Regina can be in her own right, after reading about Regina’s reservations re: her and Janis staging a fake fight (though I completely understand where she was coming from), I can’t help but think that at least towards the the beginning of the relationship, whenever she and Janis DO actually get into an argument, she embodies the “my girl is mad at me, hope i die” meme, at least a little bit 😆 like, she doesn’t necessarily make Janis privy to that, but I can definitely see her wallowing in her angst and being like, “Janis hasn’t talked to or smiled at or kissed me in 12 hours and I feel like I’m DYING”

Oh my god I love all of these

1. I'm obsessed with this bc like,,,true. They would 😂 I'm tacking a little bit onto the end of this one lol

"You always post feelings on your finsta. At least, that's what I do."

Regina is instantly on alert bc she did not know Janis had a finsta. Just all up in Janis' face like "You have a finsta?"

And Janis is like "uh. No?"

And thus begins Regina’s hunt. it takes her like an hour at most, and when she finds it, it's just full of pictures of her (both serious and goofy), pictures of their dates, and paintings. The posts range from sentimental to shit like "shes so hot I think I hauve covid"

It has 3 followers: Damian, Cady, and (maybe surprisingly) Karen

2. I had never seen a gnometok video before I'm cackling

I love that headcanon lolll

3. This one fits perfectly on with my headcanon that Regina can't sing! She totally takes every opportunity to hear Janis sing. She's got a playlist titled "songs Janis likes to sing to" and she plays it in the car all the time

4. 🥹😭 that's so cute omggg

Janis one day is like "babe, you've been so sweet learning about my culture, so I decided to return the favor. As you can see, I'm wearing my shoes in your bedroom."

5. Oh no doubt about it. Regina goes an hour with Janis mad at her and she becomes just so depressed. Only her pride is keeping her from groveling

[martian-hermit]

After not only binging the show, but also watching a dozen video essays about it, The Bear’s only become a show that I absolutely love more than anything else I’ve ever watched.

From the insanely beautiful use of color and lighting to describe settings and atmosphere to the 17 MINUTE LONG ONE-TAKE EPISODE, it’s perfect. I absolutely adore the story, the characters, the relationships between them, the character development, and the fact that every ounce of stress that exists in the show can be felt by the viewer as if they were in this world. And as someone who has personal experience in restaurants and kitchens, there’s a lot of nostalgia in feeling the pressure and stress of existing in those environments. But among my favorite examples of the genius and creativity of this show involve S1E7 “Review”, S2E4 “Honeydew”, S2E7 “Forks”, and S2E10 “The Bear”

S1E7 “Review” is the aforementioned 17 minute one-take episode. And when I say one-take I genuinely mean no hidden cuts, no tricks, a genuine single take throughout the entire episode. Now, the biggest reason I love this relatively short episode of the show is more about the way it feels to me personally because of the single take rather than the fact that it just is a one-take. The feeling of absolute chaos in the kitchen, people quitting on the spot, stress, high expectations, and stakes just feel not only terrifying, but also exhilarating. As I mentioned before, I’ve worked in foodservice for years, and thus all of those feelings are extremely nostalgic to me. But, hearing that other people who have no experience in a kitchen still feel that same pressure really goes to show how effectively the show conveyed how that work environment is. Part of the reason it’s so effective is the fact that there are no cuts to give the viewer any relief, you’re stuck in the moment for the entire episode. You have nowhere to be except in the moment with everyone else struggling to keep their composure, and it’s fantastic. The accuracy of the setting paired with the ability to drag the viewer into that uncomfortable spot whether they want to be there or not is so well done that it feels like you’re either working in a kitchen for the first time, or you’re doing it again.

S2E4 “Honeydew” was, at least I think, completely under appreciated. Seeing Marcus’s character development throughout, especially as he gets mentored by Luca is not only a nice break from the complete chaos of The Bear back in Chicago, but also important to watch to really understand Marcus as a person. In his apprenticeship under Luca, he asks questions, expands upon his knowledge, and becomes more confident as he learns. But Luca also adds so much to this episode by simply not being a stereotypical “I’m the pro and I resent you for not being as good as me” type of chef. When Marcus asks a question, he answers. When Marcus wants him to expand, he does. It’s a wonderful representation of two people with a somewhat informal mentor-student relationship interact in a way that doesn’t establish a dynamic of greater and lesser, but just two chefs that seek to improve. Nothing more.

S2E7 “Forks”. Oh my dear god, this episode. Arguably, it’s the best one out of both seasons of the show. But this doesn’t follow our main protagonist Carmy, but rather Richie, who was thought to be the antagonist thus far. Richie gets sent off to what is said to be the greatest restaurant in the world to stage. He begins the episode waking up in his bed, reluctantly bringing himself to get ready to begin his temporary job away from The Bear as per Carmy’s demand. When Richie walks into the place, it almost feels like a horror movie. The lighting is dim and unwelcoming, Richie is completely resenting being there, and he is unfortunate to be in the typical position of having to shine forks. It’s normal for a stage to start this way, but when Richie is half-assing the job entirely, the person overseeing him brings him outside to talk. Richie, expecting to get chewed out or let go, instead learns about the passion of the people working here regarding their jobs. And that’s the turning point. Richie goes from an antagonistic asshole who couldn’t care less about what’s going wrong to a guy who actually applies himself. He’s enthusiastic. It’s most notable when he runs to grab a deep dish pizza for a family visiting Chicago, and once the chef snobifies the dish, Richie of all people volunteers to give it to them. It’s when he’s at their table, giving them the food and talking to them that we really see that new side of him for the first time shining through. The immense change of his character from the beginning of season 1 to more than halfway through season 2 is immensely satisfying, but also extremely effective in presenting us with a character arc that makes you tear up. The only thing that makes it a million times better than it already is, is the fact that the lighting throughout the episode gets brighter as Richie grows. It’s a beautiful visual representation that gives a subtle visual representation of him becoming a “brighter” person.

Finally, S2E10 “The Bear”. The last episode of season 2 aptly named after the show itself is the Family and Friends night of the renovated and reinvented restaurant. This “dress rehearsal” seems like it’ll go perfectly smooth, everyone has high hopes, and after Carmy and Sydney have a heart-to-heart while fixing up a table before the real busy work begins, we feel this sense that nothing could go wrong. And, to be honest, for a while it actually plays out that way. But the issues start (just like the story Uncle Jimmy told Carmy before they started) when Carmy fucks up the first thing that night, which is when Sydney says she’s overwhelmed and would like Carmy to take over Expo, but Carmy just says she’s fine. It’s at this point that a toilet is down, tables are all behind, one of the chefs ditched to do drugs, the tension and stress multiply by several orders of magnitude, and finally, Carmy locks himself in the walk-in. But Carmy being stuck in a situation where he can’t be involved in the kitchen is when things look up. Richie takes over Expo, Sydney can cook, they start catching up, and they manage to fix up their string of fuck-ups in just four minutes. It’s perfect that it worked out BECAUSE Carmy got cut out because he had neglected to contact the fridge guy to fix the walk-in. He put himself there. That’s all his fault. But this happening instead of him suddenly overcoming his overwhelming hostility and aggressiveness as well as the neglect of the walk-in getting fixed made that first night of service perfect for the show. It’s not a flawless performance. There’s still a lot fucked up. Carmy has a lot of baggage and issues he hasn’t resolved that almost costed them that entire night. That’s why it’s perfect. He’s been deeply flawed the entire series, and having all of that resolved by the end makes a no sense. And we really feel the weight of this when Carmy ruins his relationship with his girlfriend, berates Richie, and vents to Tina about how he’s a “psycho”. We learn so much, and get the feeling that Carmy wants to be better, but still has this fear that good things will happen to him that break him out of this pure logic routine of things he’s turned his life into. It’s nowhere near resolved. Sure, the restaurant’s first night was successful, people loved it. But, Carmy’s still so, so far from having completed a character arc like so many others have.

I rarely ever watch shows more than once, but this might be the only show I’ve ever watched that I could watch over and over again without getting sick of it. I only appreciate every detail more, and it’s honestly slightly obsessive of me to love this show this much. But the way it feels like I’m back in a kitchen, stressed out of my fucking mind trying to work and keep up with everything while people are screaming at me to get things done, it’s nostalgic and addictive. I’ve never once described a show as perfect before, but I would describe The Bear as the greatest and most perfect show I’ve ever watched. The only drawback is that there’s only 18 episodes total, and I find myself wanting more, which is a rare feeling for me to hold for shows. But the real weight you feel from it, and the fact that you feel like you know the characters personally, it’s indescribable in terms of how impressively effective the show makes you sympathize with everyone and grounds you in their world. So despite the immense amount of stress and frustration you feel watching it, it’s still such a beautiful show to experience when you can connect so deeply with so many different parts of every character and feel the reality of the situations you see. And just because I can’t say it enough, I have to end this post by saying once again that The Bear is absolutely fucking perfect. Hands down, no question.

[dani-says-stuff]

Chernobyl

❥ Back to the Control Center

❥ Nate Hardy Masterlist

-Note: The words Baba and Babushka mean the same thing and are interchangeable

-Note: I didnt feel like embarrassing myself with my horrible spelling and grammar, so, the Baba's words will all be pre-translated and coming through Misha in English If my grandma knew how much I had to use google translate before I made this decision she'd smack me upside the head istg..

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Nate Hardy x fem!reader

Summary: Based on this request

Word Count: 1.6k

Warnings: sensitive topics, talk about the real events and lives of those who experienced the event, alcohol, inconsistent capitalization, my usual grammar warning

Not so much of a warning and definitely more of a heads up, this fic actually doesn’t have a lot of substance to it somehow? like somehow i managed to write 1.6k for absolute nonsense. for example, somehow, i managed to get like zero Nate scenes and neither him or Sam end up talking at all… basically huge apologies to the anon who requested this, i really struggled with this fic for some reason and i feel like it shows…

Dialogue Key:

Y/N

Colby

Misha

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It had to be one of the top experiences of your entire life thus far, and it would probably stay there for the rest of your life.

For as long as you knew the boys, this is what you all had been talking about. This was the big exploration you all had dreamed about for years, and you were finally here.

The four of you were in Ukraine, exploring Chernobyl.

As much as you had wanted to go, you'd pretty much expected that this bucket list item would have to remain undone. Yet here you were with your boyfriend and your best friends... to say it was surreal had to be an understatement.

You were able to experience the place on a personal level. You were no longer just viewing the place through photographs and video, but you were here. You were walking the streets, touching the trees, seeing everything. 

Your tour guide and translator, Misha, took you through the city he used to call home. He helped share with you the story of what had happened here from the mouths of the locals. He shared several stories and several locations that allowed you to fully understand not only the location but the people who lived there. A glimpse of the lives lived, lost, and left behind.

Your group first made their way to a science lab that was created from an abandoned house in the exclusion zone. Here, the four of you were able to talk to a scientist who was researching radiation and get a more detailed explanation of what had happened here. 

You all drove through the red forest area, one of the most contaminated areas in all of the exclusion zone. 

You were able to go to Pripyat and explore the famous city. The very location where some of the most famous pictures were taken, and you were there. 

You had been able to meet Vladimir, one of Misha's friends and a worker within the exclusion zone, who was willing to talk to you all about his experiences and how he felt after. He brought you to his old home, told you about his family, and explained what the town had been like- it was insane to hear the entire situation from the perspective of someone who was there. 

Of course, when reading about the situation, you are able to feel sympathetic and you able to understand that the situation was horrible.

However, there is something about hearing the story from a human's perspective, removed from the facts and removed from the overall objectivity of the story, just the pure feeling and experience of someone there... it just adds so much gravity to the situation, so much emotion and respect for those who lived through something like this. 

You walked through what was left of the abandoned restaurants, supermarkets, and hotels. Seeing the ruble and miscellaneous items left behind, scattered along the ground and placed among exposed brick. 

You saw the Ferris wheel in real life. Walking through an old amusement park, one which used to be filled with laughter and children running around, left in silence with not a soul to be seen. 

You went inside one of the reactors-- the one that might as well be a mirror image of the very one that the explosion occurred in. Here, you all got an even clearer explanation of what happened on a mechanical level. The theory explained to your group, was that everything done by the workers theoretically should have worked, it all came down to metal tubing warping out of shape from the extreme heat released.  

You were even able to enter control room 3, the room where the button that would lead to this catastrophic chain of events, was pushed that fateful day. 

You entered an old kindergarten, an old stadium, and a hospital used for those who were first affected by the radiation. All of which, are almost completely overtaken by the elements. Trees, bushes, and vines overtake the areas.

You were able to enter Duga Station, a military base and a lesser-known location. The area was bathed in conspiracy. documents explaining what the building was for were almost all destroyed or archived, the building was hidden on all maps, and the soviet union itself denied its existence. All of which, aid in allowing any story or explanation of the place to run wild. Things like mind control and spy headquarters, even a conspiracy that Chernobyl was a cover-up for what was happening there. 

Lastly, you all went to visit one of the last remaining villages on the outer edge of the city. Allowing you all to talk with some of the babushkas who came back to their homes, and are currently living there together. 

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The car pulled up to an area blocked off by a high fence, only allowing you to see the tops of a few roofs that lay behind it. Misha walks the four of you up the small worn driveway and through the gate where you meet the first Baba, Babushka Marusya. She was an adorable old woman, dressed in vibrant purples. 

After the woman speaks, Misha turns to you all, translating her words to English, "She just finished with homemade french fries for us."

 Your heart melted, "Aw, thank you so much!" 

"Ah, she says not to worry about it" Misha translated with a bright smile, "She says she plans to spoil you kids during your visit" 

That made your heart melt even further. 

Colby turns around to talk to your small group while Misha and Babushka Marusya spoke in Ukrainian, "Just tiny old ladies, full of joy"  

Add that to the list of times that Colby Brock jinxed himself on camera. 

Not a second later Misha turns to face Colby, looking as if he was trying his best not to laugh, "You are too attractive, she says you look like a girl" You slap your hand against your mouth to keep your laughter in as well. 

The boy's arms curled in on himself, cheeks flushing pink in both embarrassment and laughter as his friends divulged into hysterics around him, "It's the long sleeve isn't it" he pouted, a call back to earlier in the day, "It's the bright blue highlighter shirt isn't it?"

You placed a hand on his shoulder rubbing it in faux sympathy, "Aw, it's ok Colby" You leaned forward, head resting against his arm, "You're the pwettiest girl I know."

His face clouded, annoyance crossing his features. "Mhm, yeah, thanks Y/N. I really appreciate that." he deadpanned, shoving you off his shoulder. A small smile crawled up the sides of his lips at his three friends' continued laughter. 

Within a few minutes, Misha and Baba Marusya had a full spread ready for you all on a picnic table outside. Everything adorning the table, including the moonshine, was made by her from her own property. 

As good as all of the food was, part of you couldn't wait for the car ride afterward. Misha kept refilling the boy's shot glasses, and they kept drinking them.

By the time you all would load back into the car, you were certain they'd be absolutely shitfaced.

Not you though. Not because you were better at holding your alcohol, but because every time your shot glass was refilled, you drank about half and then pawned it off to Nate.

This meant, your boyfriend was having double the shots of pure, homemade, moonshine, that the boys were having and you were having about half what they were. 

You would be the most sober and camera ready for any stupid shit, he was bound to say.

Ah yes, soon you would be armed with an arsenal of material to pawn off for his embarrassment.

You were an amazing girlfriend. 

Baba Marusya saw through your plan immediately. Maybe she didn't quite understand the goal of filming him later, but she definitely got what you were doing. That much became obvious when she came around to refill your glass, she placed it a little closer to him than to you, giving you a subtle wink as she walked away.

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After you ate—and helped clean the table despite the baba's insistence that you didn't have to—you all filed into the home to speak with both her and Baba Hanna. 

They spoke to you of their lives. They talked to you about how they lived before the accident and their families. They told you stories and sang you songs of their younger years, it was both heartwarming and devastating to hear it from them. To see the joy, but also the pain they experienced when speaking of what used to be. 

You found yourself hugging Babushka Marusya about halfway through her speech talking about her family and loneliness here, of course, you asked permission through Misha first, but you felt as though you had to. You weren't one of her children and you knew she had just met you, but you hoped that somehow something as simple as a hug could give her some sort of comfort. 

It made you feel kind of stupid when you began to tear up in her embrace. Here this woman was, talking about how sad she was here and how much she misses her family, strong and not a waiver in her voice, and you were on the verge of breaking down. It only made it worse when she noticed your tears and began to your back, turning to try and comfort you. 

She was experiencing all of these things, all of these sad feelings, and all of these broken memories, but she remained a sweet woman above it all. 

It was inspiring, you knew that you would never forget this experience for as long as you live. 

[hebuiltfive]

Irretrievable

Last night, I couldn't get this out of my head. So I wrote it. Thought I'd give Virgil a whirl this time and give Scooter a little break from emotional pain.

Bonus points to anyone who can guess which song inspired this one. It's not entirely subtle from the start.

Edit to add the AO3 link.

------------------------------------

"You're losing me, Vee."

That gut-wrenching pain that only came when hearts shattered into a million pieces tore through Virgil's entire being. This wasn't supposed to be how the night ended, it wasn't supposed to be how their story ended. He hated how he couldn't control it, how he had allowed it all to simmer under the surface and break apart this way.

"I don't understand..."

"I know you don't."

"Come on, Harper, let's just talk about this!" He would beg, he would plead, because he couldn't let it go. He couldn't let him go. The ache, the loss, the pain would tear him apart bit by bit. Virgil could already feel himself breaking.

Harper stood firm, retreating a few steps when Virgil tried to close the distance, trying to make it right. "I can't."

"Please don't just walk away. Whatever it is, I can fix it. We can fix it. You've just got to talk to me."

"Talking is all I ever try to do!" Harper snapped. The salty stream of tears continued to run but it was clear he'd turned his own heartbreak into rage. Maybe it would make it easier for him to deal with. Maybe it was truly how he felt.

Either way, Virgil felt baffled by it. Never had he seen Harper so enraged, and to think that it was his fault... if his heart hadn't already been shattered, it would have in that second.

"I always tried to talk." Harper continued, seemingly not caring for how Virgil would take his words. Apparently he was done trying to tip-toe around the subject. "You never listened. You were always busy."

That wasn't... entirely true, surely? Virgil would have defended that he was a brilliant listener. He was certainly the best out of his family, and he had worn that honour with pride. For Harper to claim he hadn't been listening to them.

"Do you know when we last had an actual proper conversation, Vee?"

The question very quickly had him stumped. Virgil attempted to answer but had to close his mouth quickly to avoid looking like a fish out of water — something he very much felt in this given situation — because the answer evaded him.

"Two weeks ago." Harper put him out of his misery with a scoff. "You don't even remember!"

"Hey, I've had a lot on my plate!" He didn't snap — Virgil never snapped — but he was beginning to get irrate. Harper accusing him of things Virgil would very much disagree with? It was ludicrous and borderline over-dramatic.

"With International Rescue? Yeah, I know."

Virgil bit back a retort as he watched Harper roll his eyes. That single action seemed hurt him more than any of his other accusations had thus far.

"When we first started seeing each other, you said you were fine with International Rescue."

"That was before I saw the truth!"

Virgil blinked. "What the hell does that mean?"

Harper, as though he was stating the obvious and Virgil was too dumb to catch onto his meaning, sighed. "You promised it wouldn't get in the eay. You promised you'd have time for me, for us. You lied."

"I didn't lie!"

"You lied, Virgil! Or, at the very least, you didn't keep those promises."

Harper was back to the heartbreaking crying now, the rage passing over like a dark storm cloud that was now content it had flooded a region.

"I didn't... It's not... International Rescue is important, you know that. It's important to my family, to the world, to me."

"You pushed me down the list." Harper accused sharply.

"There's never been any list! You're acting as though I've been cheating on you!"

"I guess it kind of feels that way."

"For fuck's sake, Harper, it's my job!"

"Well, maybe I don't think you should do that job anymore!"

The truth leaked out in Harper's yell, his arms perching on his hips. Virgil saw the pain in his partner's eyes, saw the raw, honest hurt that had clearly been pushed below the surface more than once to avoid such a confrontation.

Noticing it helped to dull the betrayal Virgil felt in his soul, but only by a fraction.

Harper didn't relent. "You'd cancel on me, go out on those ridiculous, death-defying missions and I wouldn't know if you'd ever be coming home. You'd say we'd rearrange our dinner, but I never knew if you'd ever make it back."

He took a deep breath, continuing in a whisper that was broken up by uneven sobbing. "You're killing me, Virgil. You're killing me and the worst part is you don't see that."

Harper had been wrong earlier. Virgil wasn't losing him. Harper was already lost, because Virgil didn't know how to fix it.

He wasn't going to give up International Rescue. He loved the job almost as much as he loved to paint. It was his last connection with his late-father and was a pillar of his family.

Above all else, he saved lives and gave hope to people when every other resort failed.

No, he wouldn't give any of that up.

Virgil knew that Harper already understood that. The conversation would have taken a different turn had his boyfriend thought their relationship was at all salvagable.

"I love you." Virgil said, knowing it would be for the last time. He'd spoken those three words to Harper on so many occasions over the last twenty months. Never had they stung so badly.

He hadn't expected Harper to respond in kind, but the lack of hearing the words "I love you too, Vee" had Virgil's heart disintergrating.

There was no love left.

Harper had left that night with all his items stuffed into a suitcase and a dufflebag. They hadn't exchanged anymore words. Virgil watched as Harper exited the penthouse suite for the last time, not even looking back to offer him one last glimpse of those hazel eyes that would now haunt him for the rest of his life.

Alone again.

Without love again.

Virgil didn't sleep that night, too caught up in his mind. How had he not seen the signs? How had he not caught this before it had become too late? Was he truly so absorbed in his work to have so blindly stumbled down this path instead of his happily ever after?

He had seen the same story play out time and time again with Scott. Virgil had promised himself he wouldn't end up like his older brother. Then again, according to Harper, he wasn't the best with promises so why was he surprised he wasn't able to keep this one?

Virgil eyed his communicator. He was too emotionally exhausted to work out the time zones but if he called Tracy Island, one of his brothers was sure to pick up. He allowed the call to ring for what seemed like an age, and was about to hang up when John appeared as a floating image in front of him.

"Thought you were supposed to be grabbing steak at that new restaurant?" He asked by way of greeting.

"Harper... he left."

John's face fell. "Did he have a call-out?"

Virgil shook his head, hanging it lowly to hide the new stream of tears from view.

It didn't matter. John clocked on fairly quickly. "Virgil, I'm so sorry."

Comforting words were said, reassurances and love expressed, but Virgil still felt that gaping hole inside him. Harper had gone and he had taken what felt like Virgil's very soul with him.

"Do you ever question the point of what we do?" He eventually asked John once he was tired of hearing his brother's attempts of cheering him up.

"Not really. Our work is important."

"What's the point in saving the world if we have no-one to come home to?"

John didn't have an answer to that. He could have been a wise-ass and noted how they still had each other, but he didn't. Virgil appreciated that.

The question haunted him for weeks, just as the memory of Harper failed to leave him. Over and over again, he'd ask himself what the point was. Over and over again, he'd force himself to ignore the ache in his chest when he couldn't find an answer.

He felt like he was dying. In killing Harper's love, Virgil was certain he'd killed part of himself. The days grew longer and more wearisome, but he kept pushing.

One day, the pain would heal. One day, he'd find someone who understood the workload. One day, his heart would beat again for someone new.

He just had to keep holding out until that day came, no matter how long it took.

[jaelijn]

So... the Frogwares Holmes games really are something else. I should know this by now, but honestly the only thing coming remotely close to the type of Holmesian feels they give me is actively writing Holmes myself (which I haven't done in a while now). They are *invaluable* in generating that kind of headspace.

I've talked about the Frogwares Holmes games before - for my birthday I finally permitted myself to play The Awakened (2023) - and I've barely begun to process it.

It's a too short game - but considering that it was created by an Ukrainian studio in the middle of the war, that is as forgivable as the recycling of assets and the fact that it's not a brand new storyline (Though a part of me grieves for what the next game in the series might have been if there hadn't been the war - I just hope there will be more). It's a remake of an older game in the series with the same title, which I have played more than once and which really is the beginning of the Frogware games in many ways - there're two earlier games, but the original Awakened is where the series really hits its stride as a bona fide Holmes adaptation. So anyway - I knew what to expect, but also I really didn't.

The original Awakened is set after FINA, which adds its own horror. This one is set directly after the last game, Chapter One, and thus features a very young Holmes, basically directly after he meet Watson, and on some level it's the story of them really getting to know each other, and *foreshadows* FINA. But the plot doesn't even matter - or at any rate the plot isn't the reason why I love them, much as it isn't the reason why I love the canon.

I understand the canon purist scepticism, I really do, but I feel I've done the first step of getting over that when I played my first one (the original Awakened) and got over the hesitation at it being a Cthulhu crossover (and any of the other ideas that Frogware has used and made magical even though they are things that tend to make purists instinctively cringe), and the second step when I adored Chapter One and got over the fear of their new take on young Holmes.

In a lot of ways, the games chart the development of "point and click" type games in general and in a Holmesian sense, the adaptation development of Holmes interpretation - the first game was very classic deerstalker Holmes, moving over into Brett (and an older Holmes), and the later ones show definite influence of Downey and Cumberbatch, but at the same time I feel they are truer to canon than probably any of them with only maybe the exception of Brett (and not counting Merrison, which is practically exactly like canon, and not counting Elementary, which is so bogged down by the format of an American procedural).

They are by far the most psychologically complex games I know though perhaps I lack genre awareness, but either way I feel that started with Testament and Crimes & Punishment (which drove home the concept of morality in a way that I have never seen before). There is a true love for canon in every stroke (which I think is what some adaptations lack - a love for canon rather than an attempt at being *better*) and the sheer complexity of Holmes as a human being... I don't even know where to start. It seems to get better with every game, from the Holmes-as-suspect idea in Testament over the moral dilemmas in C&F, the question of legacy in "Devil's Daughter" and backstory in "Chapter One". I just feel that these games really *understand* him - the genius, the pursuit of justice, the kindness that goes beyond societal convention.

And Watson. I missed him in Chapter One, though I know why he isn't there and it makes sense that he isn't there and he never really had big roles in the previous games either, but Awakened (2023) makes up for it. What a compelling characterisation. Watson has his own complexity, some of which Watson's narration buries because Watson himself downplays his strengths and intelligence to elevate Holmes's. But once you strip out Watson's narration, you have to make a choice. Historically, we have a horribly bumbly Watson that we can perhaps unanimously agree to disagree with. Brett's Watsons are both fairly homely, but don't get much of a chance to shine on their own. Law's portrayal of Watson got *so close* but I always felt the relationship wasn't quite right, Watson wasn't quite right in his attitude towards Holmes. Freeman could have been it - if Sherlock hadn't unravelled the way it did. But this is a Watson that has his own growth and that I truly see as an equal partner to Holmes - as the person who is that sounding board and the one person Holmes would want to have with him when things get hairy - the person Holmes can rely on not abandoning him. If nothing else, Awakened (2023) cements that *trust* and I can't wait to see where it goes.

This is turning into a ramble that really boils down to: I love these games and the way they make me experience Holmes. The voice acting is *outstanding*, too - I liked the voice acting in the earlier ones, too, but the current Holmes really sells the material and I have not a bad word to say about Watson.