#is there an actual genre for things like this?

[blackkatdraws2]

[Toon x Mobster] Cartoonish strength

Just kidding. The worldbuilding would get too wacky if Toons were just able to do this stuff without restrictions or rules. Not all Toons can do stuff like this, obviously.

With his mummy having superstrength in her bloodline and his daddy being a (furry) big bad wolf, Jack ended up being unreasonably strong himself, even by Toon standards.

Another explanation for why goofy things happen to Toons comes from the Genre itself (or rather, where they live in.) Since it leans more on the whimsical side of things, the environment of the Toon Genre tends to exhibit "silly behavior," which the Toon residents have adapted and evolved to.

This means that, it's not actually the Toons themselves displaying these abilities (surviving slapstick violence, walking off a cliff and only falling when a person looks down, etc.) but it's manifested by the environment itself.

[norikuna]

pick your love story °🍵⋆.ೃ࿔*:･ jujutsu kaisen edition (sfw)

gojo satoru ☆ childhood friends to lovers

loves to tease you, and he'll always poke your cheek, ruffle your hair, or steal your food just to get a reaction. if you're shy or quiet, he lives to make you flustered. buys the most ridiculous gifts, including matching sunglasses and designer items that cost more than your rent. acts like your personal heater, always draping himself over you, wrapping his long arms around your shoulders, or sneaking his hands under your sweater to press them against your skin. if someone flirts with you? well, he's throwing him arm around you so dramatically, calling you his 'beloved' in the most obnoxious way possible. if the person doesn't back off, his carefree tone disappears and he gives them a chilling smile. loves late night drives and cafe dates, he's so the type to blast music in the car and sing off-key on purpose, always laughs when you tell him to zip it. his love language is definitely physical touch and words of affirmation, and he needs to be touching you at all times, and he constantly reminds you how much he loves you in different playful and heartfelt ways <3 he's even softer when he's sleepy, nuzzling into your neck and shit, voice always dropping to a quiet murmur as he spills whatever's on his mind.

geto suguru ☆ best friends to lovers

pretty chill, protective and a faux deep thinker type of guy. gentle and attentive, always knowing what you need before you even ask. if had a rough day, he's gonna run you a bath and try to get your favourite drink. tries to sit still and listen patiently while you rant. lowkey a bit overzealous when it comes to jealousy, but never petty. he doesn't get outwardly possessive. but if someone flirts with you, he'll wrap an arm around your waist and give the person a pretty sharp look, enough that they'll back off and shit. always takes pictures of you, and he has an entire album of random shots of you reading, laughing or even just existing bc he really does think you look beautiful in every moment. loves bookstore and vinyl shop dates, and he enjoys those sweet peaceful moments with you (flipping through books, aka arguing about different genres). he's super big on quality time + acts of service, and if he sees you struggling with anything, he'll try to take care of it before you even have to ask. loves running his fingers through your hair, and he claims it calms him, and sometimes he just gets so lost in thought while doing it, that you have to snap him out of it. he's the type to whisper sweet things in your ear absentmindedly, like 'you have no idea how much i love you' when he thinks you're not paying attention. goes all red and dismissive when he realises you actually did hear that :D and he says he's not in gossip and drama but no one talks shit like he does, lets be real

ryomen sukuna ☆ prob sum weird enemies to lover shit

claims he doesn't date, but somehow ends up trying to figure out your favourite flower. calls you stupid shit like 'brat' or 'pet' more than your actual name, but if someone disrespects you, he tears them apart without hesitation. gets jealous easily, but he won't admit it, and if someone looks at you wrong, he'll grab your chin and kiss you (not that you mind <3) his love language is physical touch and dominance, expect him to always keep a hand on your waist, neck or chin because as much as he pretends otherwise, he loves feeling your skin against his. gaslights you over silly things for fun ('i literally told you that' 'no you didn't' 'oh, so you're forgetful now). also whispers absolute nonsense in your ear just from time to time, 'did you know that octopuses have three hearts? bet you didn't, but now you do. you're welcome'). will open a jar way too aggressively to try and show off his strength but breaks it, and now you're left with no pickles and a sulking sukuna with pickle juice on his hand. carries you like a sack of potatoes on his shoulders if you piss him off. pretends he doesn't gaf, but always shares his food with you and tries to order what you like.

toji fushiguro ☆ reluctant friends to lovers

grumpy but soft for you typa boyfriend who doesn't believe in using full words in texts. only texts in 'ya' or 'nah' and he accidentally replied 'k' to you saying 'i love you' and he called you immediately afterwards because he knows he messed up. loves pda but in the most lazy way possible, and will always drape himself over you like a weighted blanket and refuse to move. always steals bites of your food (half the meal) but will act offended if you do the same. once won you a stuffed animal at a carnival and acted like it was no big deal, but he actually used up all his carnival tickets trying to win you the biggest prize. spoils you in a reckless way, and he'll hand you a wad of cash and refuses to tell you how he got the money. he just tells you to go buy something nice. love language is acts of service and physical touch because he claims he's not amazing with words, but his hands always find their way back home to you. loves lazy mornings, and grumbles when you try to get out of bed, pulling you back in with an arm around your waist.

nanami kento ☆ love at first sight

exhausted but devoted you get me, and he claims that you energise him and light up his life. lectures you when you only sleep for three hours a night. replies to the tiktoks you send with corporate replies 'that was humorous. thank you for sharing. i love you.' he thinks you're absolutely the most beautiful person on the planet, and always lets you know. pretty gentle, mature and devoted. shows his love in sweet, meaningful ways. always puts your comfort first, and he tries to take things off your plate without asking. loves cooking for you, and believes cooking is its own love language. hates unnecessary, brash pda but loves quiet intimacy. holds your hand, brushes your hair against your ear. lingering kisses on your temple. reads to you at night, and he'll sit beside you if you have trouble drifting off. his love language is absolutely acts of service and quality time, and he doesn't just say he loves you, he'll prove it in every little action of his. loves taking you out to scenic parks and hikes, and just stares after you with so much love as he tries to adjust the focus of his camera lenses to try and capture you as well as he can.

choso kamo ☆ strangers to lovers

kinda awkward but genuinely, really quiet sweet. overthinks everything, and at the start of your relationship, he even started overthinking how you said 'goodnight!' and wondered if you were mad at him, because there was no heart or emoji. would die before making the first move idk, like you're going to have kiss him first or else, otherwise i fear he's going to have a stroke. holds grudges as long as he can, and will bring up little shit (like you stealing his lunch) six months later 'remember that time you betrayed me?'. but he can only really give you the silent treatment for two whole minutes when you tease him, and then immediately apologises because he feels bad. a lot of friends tease the two of you because they think choso is too quiet or a pushover but the truth is that he's actually pretty snarky, clever and observant. very determined and always sticks to his morals, even at times when you disagree with him, he's able to put his foot down. love language is quality time and gift giving, because he's the type to remember everything you like and surprise him with it. loves watching movies with you, and pretends not to care for 90s chick flicks, but he's digging them deep down. loves holding your hand, and even in public, he'll reach for you quietly.

higuruma hiromi☆ coworkers to lovers

overworked but loves you so bad. he sometimes reminds you of a tired, single dad but he's truly joyous to date. if you call him baby in public, he immediately malfunctions and blushes. you once kissed him in a courtroom (not even when court was ongoing!) on the tip of his gorgeous nose, and he almost choked. will 100% object to random things just to irritate you, with topics like takeout for dinner, 'objection. we had sushi two days ago.' takes everything pretty seriously, until you do something cute. then he just sits there, hiding his smile behind his hand like an adorable anime protagonist. tries to be strict or protective, but you just make him super soft. secretly likes pda but pretends that he doesn't. grips your hand so tight like he fears you might disappear. loves when you rest in his lap or against his chest as he reads over cases and paperwork. you told him that he'd look hot with glasses, and you caught him browsing through lens frames.

naoya zenin ☆ arranged marriage (kinda ooc naoya btw, bear with me)

sort of a menace who should have been left on read a long time ago, but this wasn't your first choice. somehow, he folds for you almost immediately but you think he'd rather dig his own grave and neatly fold his hands over his chest as he buries himself at his own funeral before he admits that he likes you. calls you annoying but will drop everything if you text him that you need help. always saying dumb shit to you, or trying to make fun of you, but if someone else does? they're gone, like he's going to stalk them, find where they work, and get them fired from their job. texts you the stupidest things like 'if i was ugly, would you still love me?' 'i just saw an ugly baby. damn' 'what would do if i got arrested? be honest.' saw someone flirting with you once at like a fancy event, and rolled his eyes, pretending that he didn't give a flying fuck. ended up at the bathroom mirror, gripping the sink and trying not to throw up. if you ignore his texts, he's gonna send vaguely ominous messages, like 'answer me' followed by 'this is how it ends?' 'i'm leaving btw, i'm going to pack up and leave you forever and go live on my own in the wild.' you check his location and he's still at home. naoya thinks he's the prize in the relationship, he's not. definitely a pda menace, and he loves just kissing you in public.

hajime kashimo ☆ enemies to lovers but in that 'we met when we were fighting' way

your relationship is just him being reckless with no survival instinct, and you trying to keep your boyfriend alive. aka trying to stop him from licking the power outlet. will randomly challenge you to fights for no reason, never mind the fact that he'll feel bad and back out at the last minute. has no concept of personal space, and will stand nose to nose with you just to make you uncomfortable. if you back away, he's gonna follow you and ask where you're going. if someone flirts with you, he's not even going to do too much, just laugh in their face and ask the offender if they really thought they had a chance. kashimo has no concept of an inside voice at all, so god forbid you try to take him somewhere quiet. energy level always at 200% and it's a mission to even take him someplace like a grocery store. if you said 'i love you' first, it might have been the only time that someone else has bested him in something. hajime physically can't process emotions and goes green and pale (he loves you so much btw) and he looks vaguely ill at your confession. stares for five minutes before throwing himself at you. definitely a words of affirmation type of guy, instead of actions, because sometimes, he's all bark and no bite.

noritoshi kamo ☆ sweet, rom-com crush

he's actually a bit traditional, but very sweet. unfortunately, he's also so formal that it hurts sometimes. but it's fun when he asks you things like 'would you like to accompany me for an evening meal?' or 'shall we go for a stroll?' if you hold his hand, for the first few months, he sweats profusely but acts as though he's totally cool (narrator: he was not cool). lowkey believes that he doesn't deserve you and he absolutely treats you, the love of his life, like royalty. super observant and determined to make you as comfortable as possible, so you're never really left wanting for anything. if someone flirts with you, he doesn't really get jealous, but rather gets philosophical. 'it is natural for others to admire beauty such as yours. however, they must know it's not theirs to claim.' a key forefront runner of the sassy men apocalypse, even though you wouldn't be able to tell at the start. super quick-witted, but he's the type to keep his thoughts to himself, but luckily, he gets more comfortable sharing his jokes with you as times go on. blushes super easily, and he hates it because he thinks it ruins his aloof/mysterious guy persona.

[wonryllis]

PREVIEW2 : the hot dad next door (m) | park sunghoon.

﹙ 🎬 ﹚ ぃ ────𝗶𝗳 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗵𝗼𝘁 𝗱𝗮𝗱 𝗻𝗲𝘅𝘁 𝗱𝗼𝗼𝗿 𝘄𝗮𝗻𝘁𝘀 𝘆𝗼𝘂?

preview. the ever quintessential first time dad moves in next door with his five year old and finds it impossible not to fall for you, the pretty girl who gives his daughter cookies and him; the doll eyes. obsessed with your entire being, unable to keep his hands off you, park sunghoon questions if he's just crazy or he's crazy over you.

or where, he notices the way you look at his hands a little too long for it to be innocent.

meet the cast. single dad!park sunghoon with his pretty neighbour fem!reader.

genre. DILFF AUU !!, SMUT MDNI, fluff, neighbours to lovers, sunghoon is quite literally yes insanely crazed over you and for the sake of god can't keep his dick soft, domestic a little bit i guess, i want to make her my wife trope EEEKKK, slight age gap (hoon in late twenties and reader in early twenties) more to be added.

word count. 1.2k for this preview and around 20k for the whole fic.

warnings. inaccuracies about parenting cause i aint a parent, i got no idea. some hot making out in this one, dad sunghoon tired bothered from work yes it's a warning. more will be mentioned in the actual post.

check out the first preview!

"is ji— " sunghoon stands again at your door, few days later on the weekend. this time more formally dressed than normal, adorning a sleek tight fitted vest and a navy blue blazer with buttons fastened at his waist. hair styled and glasses sitting prettily on his nose bridge. the sweat trickling down his forehead and the heaviness in his breath making you feel things despite knowing it's because he's worried about his daughter with how late he got back.

"she's here don't worry, just fell asleep while waiting for you," you reassure his distraught self. being a single and new father took a much harder toll on him at times like these when he couldn't be with his angel and he honestly didn't know how he'd survive if it weren't for you.

his job asked a lot of him and he couldn't always asks his friends and family to look over her, to have someone like you beside him was a breath of relief.

"i'm sorry, the meeting lasted longer than i thought and then traffic—" he tries explaining, wishing you aren't fed up of him and his daughter yet.

"it's okay sunghoon, everything's fine. do you wanna have some wine before you go?"

in hopes of easing his stress and let his mind have a rest, you offer in a feeble tone of expectation.

sunghoon nods, sighing as he takes off his shoes slow and tired. trudging behind you as you walk over to the fridge to bring out the heavy bottle. you look up to smile at him across the counter while he slips off his blazer and folds up his sleeves, there's no way he does not know what he's doing. but then loser clueless sunghoon really is not aware of the effect his exposed arms have on you. his friends and colleagues have told and he probably remembers it at the back of his mind, but the thing is, he is not really trying at this moment, he's just tired from work.

hot and bothered. and being alone with you in a room like this is just making him feel hotter.

it takes him a second but when he notices you struggle to get the wine glasses from the shelf, he does not think much before walking over and grabbing them for you. his body behind yours, chest touching your back and with his hands stretched out it's like you trapped between him and the counter. the scent of your shampoo hits his nose and that's what makes him realize just how close he is to you.

he stands still for a moment, trying to inhale as much of you as he can, but when he feels you shift, about to turn around, he's immediately snapping out of it; stepping back in an instant.

"i-i'm sorry, just noticed you needed help so," he mumbles apologetically, rubbing the back of his neck in shyness like usual and yet again unaware of how much you did not want him to be sorry.

"yes, thank you sunghoon," you smile at him despite the little tinge of frustration at the back of your subconscious.

leading him to the couch, and sitting awfully close to him on purpose you put the glasses on the tea table, pouring in the wine as you discreetly watch him shift nervously beside you. sunghoon feels distressed and troubled, once again he can smell you the tingles of white musk playing his nostrils. and he can also feel your thigh rubbing against his, albeit obstruct by the fabric of his suit pant, still very much obvious. perhaps the wine will help him calm down.

"so how was your day?" you hand him the glass, taking your own and staring at him as you take a sip, waiting for him to answer.

you listen in patience as he rants about how all that could go wrong went wrong at work. gazing over features, and the way his clothes hugged him right. at some point, his brows furrow and he starts to frown, looking towards the balcony as he speaks.

it bothers you for some reason, you don't want him to be so stressed. with the slight intoxication of the wine in your system, you reach forward to take his glasses off, putting them away on the table alongside your empty wine glass. and tugging him closer by his wrinkled tie leave a little wet kiss, a spilt second of a first move and sunghoon swears he feels all his hesitations disappear.

his breath slows down and his face relaxes for that short moment your lips touch, internally malfunctioning at the situation, short circuiting in stillness, wide eyes and unmoving lips.

however as soon as he sees at the dazed look in your doll eyes when you pull away, all his nervousness flies out, for all he can think of is the way your lips moved on his, and how addicting it felt, like something he wanted to feel every single moment he possibly could.

"fuck," he pulls you back by the back of your head, quite literally engulfing your lips in a sloppy kiss, going berserk over the feel of you. his hands are quick to slip to your thighs carressing up and down a few times before grabbing them to haul you onto his lap. it's a mess. he can't seem to stop, kissing over your lips over and over again in soft nibbles, sometimes dragging a moment to suck on them. hands once again carressing from your thighs to your waist, holding you tight in his arms by there, yanking you closer.

it takes everything in him to pull away but it's only to catch and breath and there's no way he's letting this chance go. tucking a strand of hair behind your ear while your sweaty foreheads rest against each other.

just as he's leaning back in, still breathless,"dada?" the sound of jia's voice down the hall has you both immediately pushing away and sitting back down on the couch properly. sunghoon brushes back his wet hair and tugs at his tie before standing up to get his daughter.

"yes baby, dada's back. come on, let's go back," the way he picks her up and walks over to you makes your insides tingle, still not over the kiss.

"we're gonna be going then, thank you for—" sunghoon's eyes linger over the wine glasses and how messed up you look and he gulps before he continues,"having us over," his words sound deeper yet more innocent than the seductive meaning behind them.

you watch them walk out the door, waving jia and sunghoon good night as they unlock their front door and go in.

inside, his blazer still hung over the edge of the couch. a testament to the reality of all things that happened in the room. of it being more than just a dream. you enjoyed having jia over and taking care of her, it was never a nuisance and the fact that if you were to be together with sunghoon she would be your daughter too sounded more of a gift than a burden. you understood his situation, and despite not yet knowing of how and where jia's mom is, you trust him.

it was the start of a something sunghoon never wanted to end. and he could only hope you'd feel the same way. if only he knew how you felt.

[riotbrrrd]

I don't know if it is still true that all writing is like this ? But regardless I don't think it's that much the point whether canon forgives the abuser or not... it's more that "X deserved to kill their abuser" has become a sort of shorthand, dare I say, virtue-signalling thing for fandom, thrown around in every fandom regardless of the genre, tone, emotional core of the story, and usually as something that shuts down conversation instead of opening it. Which is sad because it sort of "flattens" fandom, acts as if every work of fiction was interchangeable, instead of interrogating how abuse manifests in this specific work and how different characters are, well, different.

(Also for the record I, personally, was thinking of mouthwashing when reblogging. sooo many mouthwashing "AU where Anya kills Jimmy with the axe!" and like. one the story very explicitely does not forgive Jimmy so I don't think it's about righting the wrongs in the canon. two. Locked in medbay overdosing on pills Anya was still trying to appease his feelings through the locked door no I don't think she would take the axe actually.)

(and sure it doesn't hurt me personally that people make silly AUs. it just reveals what I was saying, that people make these kind of silly AUs just because it's The Thing Fandom Does Now, not really in relation with the text.)

“this character should kill their abuser” i agree. unfortunately they wouldn’t do that.

[foreveia]

take two ⤨ iwaizumi hajime

⨭ genre; fluff, idiots to lovers but like they're actually so dumb

⨭ pairing; iwaizumi x fem!reader

⨭ word count; 5.7k

⨭ descriptions; your boss has been trying to set you up with her son for months, but as it turns out at the holiday party... you've already met him before.

⨭ warnings; explicit language and dialogue, no graphic content tho, alcohol

⨭ a/n; fun little short fic to fill the fix to publish something lolol enjoy this iwa love dump as i work on my next long fic (tell me in the comments if y'all like these better)

one.

There are exactly three things you know to be true about Iwaizumi Emi:

She is the best divorce attorney in Tohoku, possibly the country.

She is the kind of woman who could negotiate her way out of murder charges and secure the victim’s house in the settlement.

She is, without a doubt, trying to set you up with her son.

You respect her. You admire her. You are, on occasion, lowkey terrified of her.

Which is why you’re currently sitting at your desk, nodding at all the appropriate intervals while she breezes through yet another pitch about why her son and you are, in her professional opinion, a perfect match.

“He’s back from Irvine for the summer,” she says, skimming a property settlement document like it personally offended her. She tosses it onto your pile nonchalantly, and you let out a short sigh because it’s just more backend filing to do and, despite your adoration for your career path and real passion towards legal work, entry jobs in the firm are mostly busy work. “I really think you’ll like him. He’s—”

You tune out. Not in an obvious way, of course��no, you’re a professional. You sprinkle in the occasional mmhmm and sounds great so she doesn’t catch on, but this isn’t your first rodeo. You’ve heard this pitch before—multiple times. Hajime is intelligent, responsible, not an idiot like some of these men out here, blah blah blah.

It’s not that you have anything against him, really. It’s just that you’ve spent months perfecting the art of dodging your boss’s matchmaking attempts, and frankly, you don’t have the energy to entertain her latest scheme.

“You’re finally going to meet him at the firm’s ball this weekend,” Emi continues, finally looking up from her paperwork, her smile entirely too satisfied.

You blink. “Oh.”

“He’s excited to meet you too.”

Now that is new. Usually, these monologues are strictly one-sided—I told him about you! and You two will get along so well! But he’s excited to meet you too? That’s an escalation. That’s a game-changer. That means he knows about you. He has an opinion about you.

You resist the urge to groan. Instead, you summon a polite, professional smile—the same one you use when dealing with particularly insufferable clients. “Looking forward to it,” you say, because what else are you supposed to say to the woman who could single-handedly end your career if she wanted to?

In reality, the only thing you’re looking forward to about the ball is the open bar. Being in your early twenties means being woefully broke, and you’d be lying if you said the thought of unlimited free alcohol wasn’t a strong motivator.

So, you strike a deal with yourself: you’ll put on a fancy dress, endure painful heels, and let Emi parade you in front of her son like a prize show poodle—all in exchange for an endless supply of pinot noir, cocktail shrimp, and, if you play your cards right, an entire bottle of champagne to sneak home in your purse.

It’s a sacrifice you’re willing to make.

two.

Because you’re an adult with an absolutely thriving social life (read: you have two friends who are willing to tolerate your bullshit after 6 PM), you, Yachi, and Kiyoko are now seated at your favorite little izakaya, wedged into a corner booth with plates of karaage and a pitcher of beer between you. 

Kiyoko is talking about wedding venues. Because she’s engaged. To Tanaka. Which is objectively insane because in your head, they’re still in that “grossly obsessed with each other but pretending they’re just friends” phase, even though they’ve been together for years. The whole thing is a crime against single people everywhere, but you are supportive because your already jaw-dropping friend is somehow glowing even brighter now that she has a fat rock on her ring finger. She looks lighter, happier. She deserves it.

Yachi, meanwhile, is explaining—between delicate sips of her beer—that she’s too swamped with work to even think about dating. Which, yeah. Fair. The woman works harder than most people you know, so you respect it.

Then, as the conversation naturally shifts to your love life (as it always does, because you’re the group’s designated mess), you sigh, sinking into your seat dramatically.

“I haven’t had sex in months.”

There’s a beat of silence before Kiyoko and Yachi both roll their eyes in unison, like they rehearsed it.

“Oh my God,” Yachi mutters.

“You cannot still be caught up on GDD,” Kiyoko says flatly, pouring herself another drink.

“Okay, first of all,” you say, holding up a finger, “it is not about him. It’s just a general fact about my current state of being.”

“Uh-huh,” Kiyoko hums, entirely unconvinced.

“Second of all,” you continue, undeterred, “GDD was life-changing, and I feel like I should be allowed to mourn the lack of that level of—of excellence in my life.”

“Life-changing,” Yachi repeats, deadpan. “You hooked up with him once.”

“Yeah, and my life was changed.”

GDD—Good Dick Dude, as he has been dubbed by your dear, unsupportive friends—was a guy you hooked up with in January after a truly legendary New Year’s Eve party.

The night itself had been pure chaos. Hinata had somehow scored an invite to this insane rooftop party—one of those bougie, exclusive, if-you-know-you-know events where you absolutely do not belong but somehow manage to fake it enough to get through the door. He’d gotten a few plus-ones, which is how you ended up there, sipping champagne you definitely couldn’t afford and making out with a guy who, to this day, remains one of the most mind-blowing hookups of your entire life.

Gorgeous, buff, and dangerous with his hands. The kind of guy who knew exactly what he was doing, which, honestly? A rarity these days. You barely remember his name—something short, easy to moan—but you do remember his stupidly perfect smirk and the way he all but ruined you against the nearest flat surface.

But then the party ended, the night faded into a haze, and you never saw him again.

Which is fine. It’s fine. Really.

You’re definitely not still thinking about it.

Kiyoko takes a sip of her beer, unimpressed. “You’ve been on, what? Five Hinge dates since then? Six?”

“Seven,” Yachi corrects.

You point at her. “Exactly.”

Kiyoko gives you a long, slow blink.

“I mean that as proof that I am not hung up on him!” you clarify. “I’ve been trying, okay? But the bar is in hell. Do you know how many ‘we should get drinks’ texts I get from guys who put crypto investor in their bios?”

Kiyoko sighs. “Okay, but let’s be real—are you actually giving any of these guys a chance?”

You open your mouth. Close it. Frown. “I mean… like… conceptually?”

“Right.”

Yachi, forever gentle but devastatingly perceptive, tilts her head at you. “Is it possible,” she says carefully, “that maybe none of these guys are measuring up because you’re subconsciously comparing them to him?”

You scoff. “That’s ridiculous.”

Is it ridiculous?

Because, okay, maybe—just maybe—no one has quite lived up to that night. And maybe you’re being a little unfair to the dating pool by expecting every single guy to have that same kind of chemistry with you. And maybe you do occasionally find yourself staring at random ceilings, wondering where GDD is now and if he even remembers you.

But still. That doesn’t mean anything.

You’re pretty sure.

“I hate you guys,” you grumble, stabbing aggressively at a piece of karaage.

Yachi pats your hand sympathetically. “We know.”

Kiyoko, ever the queen of smooth topic transitions, nudges the conversation in a new direction. “Speaking of your questionable taste in men, your boss is still trying to set you up with her son, correct?”

You groan, letting your head fall back against the booth. “Unfortunately, yes. And now, apparently, he’s excited to meet me.”

Yachi perks up. “Wait, so you are meeting him?”

“At the firm’s ball this weekend,” you say, waving a hand. “It’s fine. I’ll get a little wine drunk, take advantage of the seafood bar.”

Kiyoko raises an eyebrow. “So, you’re not going to entertain the idea of this Hajime guy at all?”

You scoff. “Absolutely not.”

Yachi hums, tilting her head in that way she does when she’s about to say something devastatingly reasonable. “I mean… what if Emi’s right?”

You blink. “What?”

“What if this is it?” she says, half-teasing, half-genuinely curious. “Like, what if you meet him and he’s actually your soulmate? Imagine if this whole time, your boss has been playing the long game, orchestrating your love story like some kind of corporate fairy godmother.”

You snort. Loudly. “Right. Because that’s totally my luck.”

Kiyoko and Yachi exchange a knowing look, but they let it go.

You take another sip of your beer, shaking your head. Hajime Iwaizumi—whoever he is—is not the love of your life.

That would be insane.

three.

You had to pull out your graduate school formal gown from the back of your closet for this, but wow, you really forgot just how good you look in red.

Your day-to-day work attire consists of pantsuits and button-ups, neatly tucked into cautiously ironed trousers, so you’ve honestly forgotten how nice it is to get dressed up once in a while. There’s something about slipping into a gown that fits like a dream, sweeping your hair up just right, and swiping on that perfect shade of lipstick that makes you feel invincible. Like you could negotiate a million-dollar deal, steal the firm’s best clients, and seduce someone’s husband all in the same breath.

Not that you would, obviously.

Probably.

The venue is ridiculous in the way all law firm events are ridiculous—held in a ballroom large enough to house a small country, chandeliers dripping in gold, servers weaving through the crowd with trays of champagne and fancy bruschetta topped with fucking caviar of all things. All this just to celebrate another year of making money off people’s divorces. Incredible the way capitalism works.

You’ve barely made it through your first glass of wine before Emi finds you.

“There she is,” she croons, linking her arm through yours. She looks positively radiant in an emerald gown, diamonds at her ears, and the kind of effortless elegance that comes from winning. You’d respect it more if she weren’t actively dragging you toward your inevitable doom. “Come on, sweetheart. Hajime’s here, and I cannot wait for you two to finally meet.”

You bite back a sigh, because of course. No warm-up period, no buffer—just straight to the matchmaking. “Can’t I get a few more drinks in me first?”

She waves a hand, utterly dismissing your complaints. “You’ll like him. I know you will.”

You doubt it. But you let her lead you anyway, mostly because you know resisting is pointless: your boss has the world’s most spell-blinding smile and enough charm to always get her way. Emi always wins.

She stops near the bar, where a man stands with his back to you, broad shoulders wrapped in a sharp black suit, one hand resting on the counter as he talks with someone just out of view.

Emi squeezes your hand. “Hajime,” she calls, her voice warm.

The man turns.

And every thought in your head immediately ceases to exist.

Because standing before you, looking unfairly good in a tailored suit and sipping from a glass of whiskey like he isn’t single-handedly ruining your life, is GDD.

Good Dick Dude.

Hajime Iwaizumi is Good Dick Dude.

Your brain short-circuits. This is not happening. This is some kind of fever dream, a cruel trick played by the universe to punish you for your sins.

Hajime’s sharp green eyes land on you, recognition flickering behind them, and then—oh no. 

He smirks. Like he knows exactly what’s running through your mind right now. Like he remembers everything.

Emi, completely unaware of your crisis, beams. “Hajime, this is the associate I’ve been telling you about.”

His mischievous, more than just amused smile widens. “Oh, I know who she is.”

Your soul leaves your body.

Because that voice? That voice is the same one that had whispered filth against your neck four months ago. The same voice that had laughed when you moaned his name. The same voice that had ruined you in ways you still haven’t fully recovered from.

You are going to die. Right here, right now, in the middle of this godforsaken gala.

“Hajime Iwaizumi,” he says smoothly, offering a hand. His palm is rough when you take it—calloused, strong, a stark reminder of exactly where those hands have been. His grip is firm, steady, and entirely too knowing.

You swallow, pasting on the best Oh wow, I am totally not spiraling internally smile you can manage. “Yeah,” you say weakly. “We’ve met.”

“Oh!” Emi beams, clasping her hands together like she’s just delighted by this new revelation. “That’s wonderful! I knew you two would get along.”

You let out a sound that’s somewhere between a laugh and a strangled choke. Hajime is still watching you, head tilted slightly, like he’s enjoying this: like he can see the exact moment you realize how deeply, horrifically screwed you are. Because there is no way Emi knows. She’s too composed, too pleased. If she had any inkling that her son and her associate had met four months ago in a completely inappropriate context, she’d have you both buried in litigation faster than you could say conflict of interest.

Which means Hajime is choosing to be a menace.

God, you’re going to kill him.

“Hajime just got back from Irvine a few days ago, for the start of his summer break,” Emi continues, completely oblivious to the absolute war waging behind your polite smile. “I’ve been telling him all about you, of course.”

You almost choke on your drink. “You have?”

“Of course I have!” Emi nods enthusiastically. “She’s one of the brightest associates we have, Hajime. Sharp, diligent, absolutely ruthless in negotiations—she reminds me of myself when I was her age.”

Your lips twitch. You do enjoy being compared to the most terrifying woman you’ve ever met, so it’s really too bad that this entire situation has you currently dying inside.

Hajime hums, eyes still locked on you. “Yeah,” he says, voice dipping just slightly. “She’s definitely memorable.”

Your entire body lights on fire.

Memorable.

Oh, he’s being insufferable on purpose.

Emi sighs happily, taking a sip of her champagne. “I knew you two would hit it off.”

You want to scream. You want to throw your drink in Hajime’s face. You want to rewind time and never step foot into that rooftop party.

Instead, you just smile tightly. “Mm-hmm.”

Hajime grins at your suffering. “So,” he says, tilting his glass in your direction, “how have you been?”

You resist the urge to kick him in the shins. “Busy,” you say, voice clipped. “Working.”

“Ah,” he says, nodding thoughtfully. “Yeah, that does sound like you.”

You stiffen. Hajime, you realize, is having the time of his life watching you squirm. And it’s only going to get worse.

Because Emi suddenly claps her hands together, eyes bright with mischief. “Oh! I should leave you two to chat,” she says. “Get to know each other properly.”

Oh. Oh no. Emi. Emi, please.

But before you can protest, she winks at you—winks, like she’s a fairy godmother orchestrating the perfect romance—and disappears back into the crowd.

And just like that, you are alone with him.

Hajime watches you over the rim of his glass, eyes gleaming with amusement. “So,” he says, smirking, “I see you haven’t forgotten me.”

Your jaw clenches. “You smug little—”

“You look good,” he interrupts smoothly, scanning you from head to toe. His gaze lingers, appreciative but blatantly teasing. “Red suits you.”

God, you want to strangle him. You cross your arms, willing yourself to stay calm. “You knew this whole time, didn’t you?”

He chuckles. “I had a feeling.”

“A feeling?”

He tilts his head, as if contemplating. “Well,” he says, “it wasn’t confirmed until I saw you.”

You glare. “You could’ve warned me.”

“And miss that reaction?” He grins. “Not a chance.”

You hate him. You hate that he looks so effortlessly good in a suit. You hate that his voice is still just as devastating as you remember. You hate that even now, months later, you can still feel the phantom weight of his hands on your hips, the rough scrape of his callouses against your skin, the way he had murmured just like that, baby against your ear—

You inhale sharply. Nope. Absolutely not. We are not thinking about that right now.

Hajime, unfortunately, definitely knows what you’re thinking about. His smirk is downright criminal. “So,” he says, leaning in slightly, voice low, “been a while, hasn’t it?”

You refuse to give him the satisfaction of blushing. “Oh, shut up.”

He laughs, warm and amused, and you are horribly aware that this night is only just beginning.

four.

Hajime happens to actually be a pretty intelligent and funny person, which is making it much, much harder to dodge his attempts at flirting and his mother’s attempts at forced-proximity matchmaking.

It was supposed to be easy. You were supposed to sip your wine, endure some polite small talk, and then fade into the crowd before Emi could corner you into any serious you’d make such a beautiful couple talk. But instead, you’re somehow still here, talking to him, because Hajime Iwaizumi is annoyingly easy to talk to.

Which is not fair. It’s not fair at all, actually.

He makes it look effortless, like this isn’t completely unhinged, like it’s not absolutely deranged that your boss has spent months trying to set you up with a man who has already—

You take a sip of your wine. You are not going to finish that thought.

Hajime watches you over the rim of his whiskey glass, looking entirely too entertained by this whole situation. “You seem tense.”

“Gee, I wonder why.”

His mouth twitches, but he doesn’t argue. “Hey, could be worse,” he says. “At least my mom has good taste.”

You choke on your sip, feeling the bubbles tingle in your nose and really regretting every life decision you’ve made in the last six months. “Oh, my God.”

He laughs, tilting his glass in a mock toast.

You squint at him, wary and slightly annoyed, unable to fathom how he’s not also dying at this situation. “You’re enjoying this too much.”

“I mean…” He shrugs, all easy amusement. “I’m just saying—this could be a lot worse. Imagine if she was trying to set you up with someone actually terrible.”

“I don’t know,” you mutter, swirling your wine. “You’re already pretty high on my list of worst-case scenarios.”

“See, now that hurts.”

You roll your eyes. “You’ll live.”

Before Hajime can respond—before you can regain any sense of control over this conversation—Emi appears out of nowhere, her eyes shining.

“There you two are!” she says, absolutely beaming. “It’s time for the first dance!”

You freeze.

Hajime—the absolute traitor—just raises an eyebrow. “First dance?”

“Yes! It’s tradition,” Emi says, already ushering you toward the ballroom floor. “Senior partners and their dates open the dance floor—it’s been that way for years.”

You dig your heels into the floor. “But I’m not—”

“Now, sweetheart,” Emi interrupts, entirely ignoring your panic, “you wouldn’t want to break tradition, would you?”

You stare at her, betrayed.

She smiles.

Oh, she planned this.

Hajime, standing beside you, lets out a quiet, amused sigh before draining the last of his whiskey. “Well,” he says, offering you a hand, “guess we should give the people what they want.”

You glare at him. “I hate you.”

“Uh-huh,” he says. “That’s why you’re still holding my hand.”

You drop it immediately.

Unfortunately, that doesn’t stop him from leading you on to the dance floor. His hand slides around your waist, pulling you gently to the center of the ballroom; you’re struggling to ignore the far too many pairs of eyes on you two as he rearranges your arms around his neck.

And—oh, hell.

You forgot how solid he is.

His grip is firm but steady, his palm warm where it rests against your back. He moves easily, like this isn’t completely ridiculous, like your brain isn’t currently melting out of your ears.

“Relax,” Hajime murmurs.

You scowl. “I am relaxed.”

His lips twitch. “Yeah, totally.”

You hate him. You hate the way he’s looking at you—amused, interested, entirely too smug for someone who has already ruined your life once.

He leads you into a slow, easy step, and goddamn it, of course he’s good at this, too. His movements are effortless, confident. He keeps the rhythm perfectly, and you hate that you match him so well.

He tilts his head, watching you. “You’re thinking really hard about something.”

“No, I’m not.”

He raises an eyebrow. “Right. So you’re definitely not thinking about how good I am at this.”

You promptly step on his foot. He laughs, and it ignites your hatefire even more.

“Asshole,” you mutter.

“I was going to say you look good tonight,” he muses, unfazed. “But now I don’t know if you deserve the compliment.”

You glare at him. “Shut up.”

Hajime smirks. “Touchy.”

He spins you as the music hits a crescendo, dropping you abruptly into a dip that catches you heavily off-guard. It makes you lock your fingers tighter around his neck, and when he lifts you back up, you nearly slam right into his very, very firm chest (what the hell, is this man made entirely of protein?), face first.

“What the fuck?” you huff, a little winded. “You are actually a horrible human being.”

Hajime hums, tilting his head slightly, his eyes flickering with something too smug, too entertained. “You keep saying that,” he muses, voice low enough that it barely carries past the space between you, “but I think you just like having someone to complain about.”

Before you can deliver a scathing reply, he tugs you a fraction closer. It’s subtle, barely noticeable to anyone watching, but you feel it—the shift of his fingers pressing against the small of your back, the way your body slots against his just enough for warmth to pass between you.

Your breath catches, and it’s infuriating how he notices. How his hold tightens, like he can read every single thought running through your head and is thrilled by it.

“You’re such a dick,” you frown, shifting slightly, trying to put some space between you.

Hajime chuckles, and the sound is entirely too satisfied. His mouth is right by your ear, so you practically feel it more than you really hear it, when he murmurs, “And what are you gonna do about it?”

Your brain short-circuits.

Because that—that—is not fair.

That is the kind of thing a man should not be allowed to say in that voice, in that low, teasing rumble, into your ear, while holding you against him like this.

It happens before you can even think about it.

Before you can register that you are, in fact, in the middle of a ballroom at your company’s annual gala. Before you can process the reality that Emi is somewhere in this crowd, and she has already been insufferable about this whole ordeal.

Before any of that can hit you, you grab the lapels of his stupidly well-fitted suit, tilt your chin up, and kiss him.

It’s instant, sharp, devastating. Your hands tighten against his chest as you crash into him, and Hajime—because he is the worst person alive—immediately reacts.

One hand presses firm into your back, the other finding its way to your jaw, fingers curling just slightly as he deepens the kiss without hesitation. His lips are warm, just the right mix of soft and steady, and when he angles his head just so—his nose brushing against yours, his thumb skimming your cheek—you feel yourself sink, like he’s pulling you under and you don’t even mind drowning.

It should not be this good.

It should not set your pulse racing like this, make you forget for a single, damning second that this is the worst possible thing you could be doing right now.

But it does. And for just a moment, nothing else exists. Not the party. Not the music. Not the fact that literally everyone is watching you right now. Just the heat of his mouth, the firm press of his fingers at your back, the way he exhales sharply like he wasn’t expecting this either, but he’s not about to stop it, not for anything in the world. 

And then you remember where you are.

You rip yourself away, blinking rapidly, your brain racing to catch up with what you just did.

And that is the moment you hear it: the loudest, most delighted squeal of your entire existence.

Your stomach plummets.

Because standing at the edge of the ballroom, her hands clasped together in sheer glee, is none other than Emi Iwaizumi herself. And she is positively vibrating with joy.

“Oh, sweetheart,” she gushes, and the way she looks at you is the exact way someone would look at their child who just announced they were getting married. “I knew it! I knew you two would be perfect together!”

Your soul leaves your body. You stare at her, horrified. You slowly turn back to Hajime—who, because he is an absolute menace, is still standing entirely too close, still holding you just slightly like he isn’t ready to let go.

And he is smiling.

The kind of smile that says I win. The kind of smile that says he is absolutely going to remind you of this for the rest of your natural life.

You physically have to stop yourself from shoving him away.

Instead, you inhale, sharp and deep, and will yourself to stay calm. Emi is still talking. She is still gushing. And you cannot deal with whatever she’s about to say next, so before she can so much as breathe, you turn back to Hajime, seize his wrist, and drag him off the dance floor, because if you don’t get away from this immediately, you are actually going to die of secondhand embarrassment and shame.

five.

This is because of your dry spell.

Your dry spell is the reason why your entire sense of self-control and awareness have gone out the window, and the reason why, now that you and Hajime have successfully escaped the ballroom onto the balcony, he is doubled over laughing and you are actually freaking out.

“Jesus fuck,” you groan, pressing your hands to your face. The cool night air does nothing to soothe the absolute catastrophe unfolding inside your brain. “I kissed you. I kissed you in front of everyone.”

Hajime straightens, still grinning like an asshole. “Yeah,” he says, entirely too pleased. “You did.”

You drop your hands, glaring. “Fuck you, dude. You’re not helping.”

He shrugs. “Wasn’t aware I needed to.”

You let out an incoherent noise of distress.

Hajime, because he is insufferable, just leans against the balcony railing, watching you unravel like it’s the best entertainment he’s had all night. His tie is slightly loosened now, his jacket unbuttoned, and somehow, he looks even better like this—a little rumpled, a little amused, looking at you like he already knows how this is going to end. 

That is actually unacceptable.

“This is your fault,” you snap, pointing an accusing finger at him. “You goaded me into it.”

Hajime raises an eyebrow. “Oh, so I made you kiss me?”

“Yes,” you declare, with full conviction, even though you definitely grabbed him first. “You set me up.”

He snorts, shaking his head. “You really can’t handle taking the L, huh?”

“I can handle it,” you insist. “I just don’t want to.”

His lips twitch like he’s trying very hard not to laugh again. “So you kissed me against your will?”

“Yes.”

Hajime tilts his head, amused. “Interesting. Because you seemed pretty into it.”

Your jaw drops. “I—you—shut up.”

He chuckles, and God, his voice is all warm and low and pleased with himself, and you really need to get it together before you do something stupid again.

You exhale sharply, crossing your arms and shifting your focus to the city skyline instead. Sendai stretches out before you in a sea of golden lights, a stark contrast to the absolute nightmare happening in your head. 

This is fine. You can recover from this. You just have to never, ever acknowledge it again.

You square your shoulders, turning back to him. “Okay. Here’s what’s going to happen. We are going to go back inside, pretend this never happened, and move on with our lives.”

Hajime hums, considering. “Yeah, I don’t think that’s gonna work.”

You squint. “What do you mean that’s not gonna work?”

He pushes off the railing, taking a step closer—too close, enough that you feel it again, that ridiculous, stupid warmth that shouldn’t still be there after all this time. “I mean,” he says, slow, deliberate, “you’re acting like that kiss was a mistake.”

You blink. “Because it was.”

He lifts a single eyebrow. “You sure about that?”

“Yes,” you say immediately, but it comes out way too defensive, and Hajime knows it.

He grins. You decide that you hate him.

“I’m sure,” you insist, crossing your arms tighter, like that will somehow make this whole situation less insufferable. “It was a heat-of-the-moment thing. A lapse in judgment. That’s it.”

Hajime tilts his head, thoughtful. “Okay. So if I kissed you again right now, you wouldn’t like it.”

Your entire brain short-circuits. The audacity. The unbelievable nerve.

You gape at him. “You wouldn’t.”

His grin widens. “Wouldn’t I?”

You hate how smug he looks. You hate that your stomach flips at the idea of it. You hate that you don’t immediately shut it down.

He watches your expression carefully, like he’s waiting for you to stop him, like he won’t actually do it unless you give him some kind of sign. Which is so much worse, because it means he’s giving you the chance to say no, to walk away, to end this before it can spiral any further.

But you don’t.

And that—more than the kiss itself, more than Emi’s squealing, more than the public spectacle you just made—is what finally sends you into full-blown panic mode.

You do want him to kiss you again.

You stare at him, pulse thrumming, brain caught in a violent tug-of-war between denial and desire. And Hajime? Hajime is watching you with the patience of someone who knows he’s already won.

“Say it,” he murmurs, voice low, steady.

You scowl. “Say what?”

“That you want me to kiss you again.”

Your jaw clenches. He’s baiting you, letting you choose, waiting for you to meet him halfway. You exhale sharply, tilting your chin up. “You’re so full of yourself.”

His mouth twitches. “Not an answer.”

“Fine,” you snap. “I want you to kiss me again.”

Hajime grins. “That’s all I needed.”

And then, he does.

This time, it’s slower, deeper, not rushed by the heat of the moment. He takes his time, like he’s savoring it, like he’s memorizing the way you melt into him. And you? You let him. Because, goddamn it, you were never winning this battle.

When you finally pull away, breathless, he smirks down at you. “See? Not a mistake.”

You groan. “I hate you.”

He laughs, pressing another quick kiss to your forehead that feels far more intimate than a casual pair of friends-with-benefits should. You, scandalized, shove him away, but Hajime just grins, like he knows exactly what he’s doing.

“You’re impossible,” you mutter, pressing your fingers to your forehead, like that will somehow stop the ridiculous heat crawling up your neck.

Hajime hums, smug. “And yet, you’re still standing here.”

You are still standing here. You could have left, could have walked back into that ballroom and pretended this entire thing never happened. But instead, you’re here. On this balcony. With him.

You shift, glancing at him out of the corner of your eye. “So… what now?”

Hajime leans back against the railing. “Dunno. Guess that depends on you.”

You narrow your eyes. “Why do I feel like you already have an answer?”

“Because I do,” he says plainly, in a way so nonchalant and effortless it could only be said like that by him. 

You exhale sharply, tilting your head up to the sky, like the stars might have some kind of solution for this. “You know this is gonna be a thing now, right?”

Hajime raises an eyebrow. “A thing?”

“Yeah,” you say, making a vague gesture between the two of you. “A thing. Emi’s gonna lose her mind. She’s probably already telling the senior partners that her matchmaking career is a success.”

Hajime laughs, the sound easy, effortless. “Yeah. She probably is.”

You sigh, dragging a hand down your face. “I am never going to live this down.”

“Probably not.”

You squint at him. “You could at least pretend to be sympathetic.”

Hajime shrugs, then reaches for your hand, tugging you forward so suddenly that you nearly stumble into him. His hands slide down to your waist, thumbs brushing over the fabric of your dress. “I could,” he murmurs, close, too close, “but we both know I wouldn’t mean it.”

You scowl. “You’re the worst.”

“And yet,” he says, smug, “you still kissed me. Twice, actually.”

You glare. “Stop counting.”

“No promises.”

You groan, pressing your forehead to his chest in sheer exasperation. “This is my villain origin story.”

Hajime just laughs, wrapping his arms fully around you, and you hate—hate—that it feels nice, that it feels right.

“Hajime,” you say, voice muffled against his suit jacket.

“Yeah?”

You lift your head just enough to meet his gaze. “If we’re doing this, you are legally required to make it up to me with at least two fancy dates. Minimum.”

Hajime smirks, like he was already planning on it. “Deal.”

“And no getting too smug about this, either,” you squint.

He tilts his head. “Define ‘too smug.’”

You groan, shoving at his chest. “God, I hate you.”

Hajime just catches your wrist and grins, pressing a slow, soft kiss to your knuckles. “Sure you do.”

You really don’t. And both of you know that very well, because he has his mother’s spell-blinding smile and you have always been a sucker for them both.

⨭ closing; churned this out over one 3 hour writing sesh bc i got this idea in my head and had to see it through. not proofread and very very hastily written, but i like her anyway. #comment #reblog #lemme know ur thoughts mwah xoxo

[hwaslayer]

wildfire (cs) | 12.5

—spotify playlist | series masterlist

—summary: assistant professor in bioengineering, incredibly attractive, lonely and divorced; that’s how most people describe san. but despite the events that have happened in his life, san has a lot going for himself. he’s a successful, sought out professor due to his brilliant contributions to science at just an early age of 32. he worked hard to get where he was now; head deep into his research, his publications, building his lab and creating a name for himself. everything was good and smooth sailing— until it wasn’t. because when he meets you, a bioengineering grad student interested in rotating in his lab, he finds himself ready to risk all the blood, sweat and tears he put in throughout the years just to keep you close— his need for you spiraling out of control like a wildfire.

—pairing: asst. professor!choi san x grad student!f. reader

—genre: (18+ - minors dni) strangers to lovers, grad school au | fluff, angst, smut

—word count: 3k

—chapter content/warnings: cussing, infidelity, suggestive/implied smut, indications of a toxic relationship, very broken relationship at this point actually, lots of back and forth, also pls remember i didn't put any hard dates to things that have happened so i couldn't tell u exactly what day, time and season iseul decided to be like this 🫤, crying, yelling, a sprinkle of violence (like a push, slamming hand against the wall, throwing objects), hints of manipulation and gaslighting

—on rotation: oceans & engines - niki | blame - bryson tiller

⇢ POSTDOC | EARLY YR 3

Love does not prevail.

Love does not conquer all.

San used to think it did, but as he's been sitting in his old room at his parents' home, he's realizing that wasn't the case for him. He tries, and he tries. He tries to make himself believe that it still can conquer all, and that it still can prevail. He tries to tell himself that it wasn't him, that he did no wrong. That this was just a fucking dream he's waiting to wake up from.

He tries to believe what he has is still love.

He tries to believe he is still worthy of receiving love and being loved; of not sitting in this heartache for long.

—FLASHBACK

San is exhausted, but he's excited to be coming home a whole day earlier than planned to surprise Iseul. He caught the next flight out as soon as his commitments during the conference had wrapped up, ready to come to his wife and be in her arms. He couldn't wait to hold her, kiss her, and shower her with love especially because they had been arguing lately. It's like that was the only form of communication they knew.

All he wanted was to stop— to make up and to give her everything, to have her back and to just be.. happy.

Why were they even fighting so much?

Iseul felt distant and he wasn't sure how to bring her back. But, he'd try his damn hardest. She was his wife and he loved her so. He would never give up no matter how hard it got.

It never used to be this way.

San picks up Iseul's favorite perfume from the Duty Free and stops by a quick flower stand to grab a small bouquet of roses. He calls an Uber that comes in less than 5 minutes— San gently setting his carry-on bag in the trunk before plopping into the backseat with the roses and perfume sitting on his lap. He texts Iseul as if he hasn't returned, trying to keep the surprise under wraps as much as possible. He's trying to see what she's up to and if she ate for dinner, but she hasn't responded.

Which, again, wasn't entirely uncommon behavior from Iseul.

But, since they had been fighting and arguing so much recently, the pauses and breaks in between texts seemed to be getting longer and longer— a tiny detail he refused to look at because it would unravel the rest of the problems he had been brushing under the rug;

Problems he stuck at the back end of a book.

He texted her close to three hours ago. 

San didn't really know why Iseul was so angry with him sometimes. She argued and she would say things that made him feel like something deep within her resented him more than loved him. He's aware he's not the best with his time management, he's aware that, sometimes, he makes her feel like she comes after everything else.

He's aware.

He'll acknowledge his mistakes and short-comings, but he'll always make up for it. He isn't perfect, but he'll always try. Always.

When the cab pulls up to the house, nothing feels unusual. He feels like he sees Yunho's car parked on the side street a house down, but that wouldn't be too unusual since he's always around. But, it does feel a little weird that he would be here when San wasn't home. The two had been really close as of lately, and it felt like Yunho had gotten closer to Iseul than he had been with San.

Yet, another tiny detail he refused to look into because of all the possibilities.

They could never.

San felt so naive, but they could never.

He gets inside the house and the living room TV is still on. Kinda loud, actually. There's two wine glasses sitting on the counter, both empty with remnants of red wine pooling at the bottom. San sets his work bag down before carrying his carry-on duffle upstairs with him, along with the flowers and perfume.

Funny that they aren't down here.

He climbs up the steps, wondering if Iseul was in the room and Yunho was busy doing something else? He can't come up with anything because there isn't really anything to do up here.

They're still nowhere to be found.

He feels his heart beating out of his chest.

Because he nears their door and Iseul is making those sounds she makes when San makes love to her. Except, she's a little louder this time. Throws in some giggles. At first, San thinks he's dreaming; that there's no way she could be doing this to him right now. 

There's no way. She was his wife.

She would never.

They would never.

Then, the door creaks open from the harsh breeze that comes in through the cracked window of the room. San gets a glimpse of the bed and the sheets are different. Things feel different.

And that's because they are. 

Everything is different, and everything will be different from here on out.

If only San knew that, if only he caught on earlier.

Would've saved his ass from the heartbreak that was about to be catered to him on a silver platter.

The sounds are indeed leaving Iseul's lips, and as soon as San pushes the door open, he almost wished it could have been anybody else if this were literally the circumstances that were meant to find him. If this was going to happen either way, he really wished it was somebody else. Because why is he watching Yunho grip Iseul's hips the way he normally would when she's on top? 

Why is he looking at her the way he is— like she's everything to him, like she holds all the answers he's been looking for, like he.. loves her.

San doesn't even know what to say at first, he doesn't even process this. He just drops his things to the ground, along with Iseul's perfume and the flowers. The thud is enough to make them turn their attention towards the door, immediately pulling on the sheets when Iseul hops off of him.

They look at him in shock.

What was he doing here?

Ironic, San has the same question.

"You two actually can't be serious." He says close to a whisper, a pathetic chuckle leaving his lips because what in the actual hell is going on? "You can't be serious." He repeats, but this time, his tone is laced with disbelief, confusion. Anger. "You can't be serious!" His tone rises.

"W-why are you here? I-I thought you weren't coming home for another day."

"Oh, so that's how you'd be filling in your time while I'm away?" He scoffs angrily. "I should've known, I should've fucking known!" He's yelling now, and he hasn't yelled like this ever. "You couldn't even save me from all this fucking mess?!" He aggressively runs his hand down his face, hands placed on his hips as he paces around. Not even sure where the fuck to look while Yunho and Iseul are scrambling to get themselves together and out of the damn bed.

The damn bed he shares with his wife.

"San— I can—" 

"What the fuck can you explain?!" He grabs the closest thing to him, which happens to be the tiny vase full of fresh lavender that Iseul bought recently and throws it against the wall in pure rage, frustration. "Huh?! What the fuck can you possibly explain, Iseul! Do you think I'm stupid? Do you take me as a dumbass?" He pounds his hand against the wall near the doorway.

He scares himself. 

He has never been this angry.

He has never felt himself feel so different and worked up, almost borderline toxic, in a relationship. It feels so wrong, it feels so unhealthy. Unlike him.

"How long?" He mutters.

"It was just—"

"How long!" He yells again, and it startles Iseul and Yunho.

"A month or so." Maybe he shouldn't have asked. There's so much uncertainty in her tone, she can't even remember the exact time this all began.

It all blended.

It was a blur.

It could've been more. Feels like. Yunho gives her a look and it's obvious.

She's lying.

"I should've known. I should've known. I should've known." San keeps repeating to himself, tears are streaming down his cheeks even though he's more livid than anything.

"I'll just go—"

"No, you stay. I'll go." He almost growls lowly at Yunho.

"San—" Iseul calls for him. All of a sudden. 

"No, don't. Don't call for me because you weren't doing that before. This is it, Iseul. You don't get to call me, you don't get to ask me to do anything. You don't need me! Stick with him since that's what's been happening all along. Aren't I right? You two really deserve each other."

"San." Yunho sighs, slipping into his shirt as San is about to head out of the door. 

"We should really just talk about this—" 

"What the fuck is there to talk about?! What is wrong with the both of you, wasn't that enough of an explanation?" Yunho mistakenly places a hand on his shoulder to try and get him to turn back, but San pushes him with so much force that Yunho stumbles against the drawer and causes a frame to tumble and fall to the ground. "Don't touch me." He glares at Yunho, eyes glazed over as hot tears brim his lids. "Do not touch me ever again. I don't need any explanations, I don't need anything." He swallows the lump in his throat. "I'm done with the both of you." He slips the ring off of his finger and tosses it near the bed, letting it land on the floor as it slips down the sheets. "Have it, Iseul. Take it all. That's what you do best." He is barely able to get out. "I'll come back to grab things when you aren't around."

"San!" She cries for him, slipping on her robe to chase after him. Yunho grabs her by the wrist and tries to stop her, shaking his head as a way to tell her to let it go. She quickly eyes the roses and the perfume near the bed, causing her to snatch her wrist out of his grip. She heads down the stairs and continues to call for San even though he's already in his car and about to pull out of the garage.

She cries as she frustratingly runs her hands through her hair, unsure of how she could try to salvage her marriage.

How could she bring him back?

—END

He checks the time and realizes Iseul won't be around the house right now due to some lab dinner she's attending. He still sees her calendar linked to his and he's close to deleting it, but he needs to grab the rest of his things before he can do so. They haven't really talked about that night because she's good at playing her game. She's tried, and she's tried.

She keeps crying for him, calling for him.

She came back running right after the whole thing. Then, they fought. She ran back to Yunho. 

Came back. 

It makes him so confused and so, so tired to be dancing in circles. He might be dumb for falling for it every time, especially when things clearly haven't changed. Why does he have to fight for a spot with Yunho? 

He was her husband.

He shouldn't have to.

What else could she possibly want from him? 

He was done with this. He was tired, and he was done.

His parents aren't home either [thank god, he can't take another second of them nagging and prying], so he swipes his keys off the counter and leaves with haste. He's trying to avoid a run-in with Iseul because all he wants to do is grab his shit and leave in peace.

He doesn't even know what's gonna happen to the house, he's not even sure if he would want it should she give it up in the end. Every corner is gonna be painted with her face, even Yunho's, when it was meant to be a happy home for two people.

Them.

San sighs heavily as he makes the trek down to the house, which is kinda far but he doesn't mind the drive. It's peaceful, it's relaxing; it calms his nerves. He blasts his music through the speakers, zipping through the highway and the streets before pulling up to the garage. The house is dark and Iseul's car is nowhere to be found. He quickly slips out of the car and unlocks the door, stepping out of his shoes before climbing up the steps to the room. There are some unwashed dishes in the sink and the flowers sitting in the vase have wilted away.

The candle hasn't been replaced with a new one.

The throw blanket on the couch is falling off the edge.

When he gets upstairs, some of Iseul's drawers aren't completely shut. The closet door isn't closed. Her laundry is still unfolded and at the end of the bed they once shared. Sheets are different again, but this time, they're a dull pale baby blue. The extra sheets her mom gifted them when they had first moved in.

Since that night, Iseul hasn't placed flowers in the room. Their pictures are gone.

The shutters remain close. 

All signs of a broken and cold home.

He tries not to pay attention to the feeling settling in his stomach right now— after all, he's on a mission to grab some things and go. He throws a few things into his duffle bag, making sure to grab some extra socks and boxer briefs to last him until his next trip to the house. He's got enough clothes that he could mix and match with so he thinks he's good.

He thinks he's set, and he thinks he managed to slip by unnoticed again.

Except, he hears the front door shut when he heads down the steps. 

"San?" She asks for him softly. He slowly heads down the rest of the stairs and turns the corner to see her standing there. She doesn't look too happy, nor does she look like she's been able to sleep well recently. But, he doesn't think it's fair to put the blame on him for all of that. She did this to them. "Hey."

"I'm done grabbing clothes, I'll be out of your way—" She stops in front of him and he tries to take another step to the side, which was also unsuccessful.

"Wait, why don't you just stay? Aren't you tired of doing this?" He furrows his brows and subtly shakes his head.

"Aren't you, Iseul? I don't know what you want from me."

"San, I'm sorry." Iseul starts to cry to him, making him tear up in return. But, he can't. He's done. He doesn't wanna do this anymore. He deserves better. He's crying because he's exhausted, not because he wants her back or because he misses what he had with her. It's too much of painful memory to even reminisce about. He is just tired. "Please. I'm sorry, I just want you. I don't wanna do this anymore, I— we can fix this, can't we? We can go to counseling and fix this."

"Iseul, no." He pries her off of him, tears streaming down his cheeks. "No, we can't. There isn't anything to fix."

"Don't say that." She almost whines. "I'm sorry, San. Please just— please don't do this. I'm not gonna give this up."

"What makes you think you haven't already? No." He repeats. "You chose that night and you made your decision. You decided to start that whole thing with Yunho, and you decided to let him stay. You let me go, and I don't deserve all of this bullshit, Iseul." He places his hand out to keep his distance when she tries to grab for him once more. "Why can't you stop? Don't you see how fucked up this is?" He cries. "I don't wanna do this anymore. I'm so fucking tired. So please, no. I don't want this, please stop putting me through this." He begs. The tears continue to stain his cheeks even as he licks his lips and swallows dryly. He watches as Iseul sobs into her hands and falls to her knees on the floor, but he has nothing else to say.

Nothing left of him to give.

"San."

"I'm gonna go." He whispers, gaining the courage to step aside her and slip into his shoes, walking out as the pain burns him deep in his chest hearing Iseul continuously sob into her hands. When he plops into the driver's seat, he tosses his duffle bag off to the side and lets out a shaky sigh. He continues to cry to himself, digging his own head into his hands before he gathers himself and turns on the car. He doesn't think he should drive right now, but he just wants to go home and be in his own peace. So, he speeds off; though, the world feels like it's caving in on him.

For a second, San thought he deserved all of this. He felt so fucking sorry for himself because he thought he deserved every bit of the hurt, the betrayal, that came his way. Every time he thinks about it, it slices his wounds open all over again, and he feels sick to his stomach.

The pain burns.

His chest feels tight.

He almost feels like he can't breathe.

Because in the end, he learned the hard way.

Love does not prevail.

Love does not conquer all.

—taglist: @asjkdk @interweab @woojirang @svintsandghosts @cheolliehugs @persphonesorchid @mxnsxngie @jycas @cowboydk @vcutparis @chngbnwf @struggling101 @sanhwalvr @angelqueendom @barbielibra @brown88 @choisansplushie @yunhoswrldddd @hyukssunflower @vickykazuya @lucid-galaxys-world @jaytheatiny @pommelex @thechaotictheoryy @vixensss @santineez @nopension @domfikeluva @in-somnias-world @my-atiny-kookie-rkive @mountiiny @naoristerling @onmymymyway @thecutiepieme @wyrated

[lowlife-in-high-orbit]

that last addition has very similar energy to teenage me going on abt Goethe's "Faust" (tho teenage me obvs had extemely little clue abt anything compared to JRRT)

everybody was like, "this is classical literature, greatest German play of all times" and I was like, listen. it's fantasy. y'all can't just call this the "greatest work" and then diss the whole fucking genre in the next breath. like, it's got everything? a dissatisfied scholar getting into magic, a really fucked up romance, a straight-up murder, a bet with God... also there's a plot-relevant poodle. part two has fairies

the thing is, we get fed this story in school (in Germany) and most think it's one of those classics you gotta read bc the curriculum says so, but really it should be analyzed as the wild ride it is and not some pretentious "great lit" type thing so dry you can use it as dessicant just bc it's a play written in verse by a big-name author from centuries ago

TL;DR, some of that old literature is actually pretty damn rad and has more cool shit going on than you might think based on the sleep-inducing takes you might've seen abt it in school / university, and you should absolutely read more of this stuff

It’s easy to forget JRR Tolkien was a fairly prolific academic translator with an interest in early medieval literature and philology. It’s so inspiring that he found time to write The Hobbit while fighting for his life over Beowulf.

[semisasseater]

COLOR MY WORLD 너로 가득해 ─ se-mi

⤷ Love of my heart 텅 빈 내 세상에

│pairing : gf!se-mi x fem!reader │genre : hurt, comfort, and fluff │warnings : mentions of anxiety/panic attack, comfort after distress, soft intimacy │summary : se-mi seeing you have a panic attack makes her feel bad, so why not allow you to do something you always wanted? color on her tattoos │wc : 273 │authors note : guys i actually LOVE my girlfriend gabby so much she’s the cutest girl ever !! she’s my favorite person ahh i love her sm my baby also yes this is short. not proofread

if you enjoyed likes or reblogs would be amazing! feedback is appreciated also requests are open!!

You exhale shakily, fingers still trembling as you sit cross-legged on the floor of Se-mi’s tiny apartment. The panic had come and gone like a passing storm, leaving you exhausted, but not quite ready to rest.

Se-mi watches you from the couch, her sharp eyes softer than usual. She doesn’t say anything, doesn’t push—just shifts in place, rolling up the sleeve of her hoodie to expose the ink along her forearm.

“You wanna color?” she asks, voice low.

You blink at her, grounding yourself in the present. “What?”

She nods toward the coffee table, where your colored pens sit in a messy pile from some half-finished doodle session days ago. “My tattoos you always say they’d look good in color”

Your fingers twitch, itching for something to focus on. Se-mi must notice because she leans forward, resting her arm in your lap. “Go for it” she murmurs.

You trace the intricate lines of her tattoos—black ink sprawling across her pale skin, a mix of floral patterns and abstract designs. Some of them are old, slightly faded, while others look fresh, like she’d gotten them recently. You grab a pink pen and start carefully filling in the petals of a cherry blossom near her wrist.

The simple motion of coloring, of feeling the smooth skin beneath your fingertips, slows your racing thoughts. Se-mi hums softly, her free hand brushing against your knee as if to remind you she’s still there.

“You okay?” she asks after a while.

You nod, switching to a red pen for the next section. “Yeah this helps”

She grins, tilting her head. “Good might make this a permanent thing if you do a good job”

You roll your eyes but smile anyway, settling into the quiet with her. The world outside may still be overwhelming, but here, in the warmth of Se-mi’s presence, things feel a little easier.

@semisasseater

[cherrycheolkat]

• hoodies and candy

feat. kim mingyu & choi seungcheol •

.𖥔 ݁ ˖ִ ࣪⚝₊ ⊹˚ .𖥔 ݁ ˖ִ ࣪⚝₊ ⊹˚ .𖥔 ݁ ˖ִ ࣪⚝₊ ⊹˚ .𖥔 ݁ ˖ִ ࣪⚝₊ ⊹˚ .𖥔 ݁ ࣪⚝₊ ⊹I ˚ .𖥔 ݁ ִ ࣪⚝₊ ⊹˚ .𖥔 ݁

pairing: kim mingyu x f!reader x choi seungcheol

word count: 4.6k

genre: fluff, angst, f2l, friendship, college au, study buddy au, soccer player!mingyu , clumsy!mingyu, cute!mingyu, soccer player!seungcheol, implied poly

summary: mingyu left his hoodie at y/n's after studying until he passed out - he doesn't know why y/n is wearing it and refusing to give it back, especially when he knows she just took pity on him and his horrible grades and is basically tutoring him through his econ class - maybe if he hadn't been a jerk the year before and blown up everything between them, but here they are, and he really just wants his hoodie back

warnings: explicit language, mentions of anxiety, sexually suggestive situations, drinking, implied poly relationship (throuple)

a/n: this changed as I wrote it, there should probably be a part 2 explaining seungcheol x reader…and maybe a part 3 were there’s some resolve..but this is what i have rn

♡ if you would like to be tagged in my upcoming posts, let me know

.𖥔 ݁ ˖ִ ࣪⚝₊ ⊹˚ .𖥔 ݁ ˖ִ ࣪⚝₊ ⊹˚ .𖥔 ݁ ˖ִ ࣪⚝₊ ⊹˚ .𖥔 ݁ ˖ִ ࣪⚝₊ ⊹˚ .𖥔 ݁ ࣪⚝₊ ⊹˚ .𖥔 ݁ ִ ࣪⚝₊ ⊹˚ .𖥔 ݁

Mingyu sat up suddenly, his heart racing as he blinked sleep from his eyes because where was he, he wondered - he stared around the neat apartment trying to gather his bearings. His mouth was dry and tasted a bit gross - he knew he definitely wasn’t at home. He was on a couch though and there was a coffee table close by covered in textbooks. It clicked in his mind that he had been studying with y/n - fuck, he had been studying with y/n and had passed out - that was his best guess of the situation. 

Shit, he thought, he had been studying with y/n the night before and had been tired from weeks of insomnia and morning practices and of all the fucking places, he blinked slowly and was amazed that she hadn’t thrown water on him and kicked him out. 

He attempted to quietly grab all of his books and notes and laptop - if he had managed to go unnoticed for this long, he wanted it to stay this way. The last thing he needed was for her to stop helping him study for econ and his random ass poly sci class. 

She was literally the only reason he was making it through either of those classes. He blinked hard, trying to focus on which notes were his. He knew this was a cluster fuck, and god forbid she somehow didn’t know he was still there. He stopped and rubbed his face again before checking one more time that he had gotten his things and left everything else undisturbed.

He glanced around, hoping that she wasn’t like actually standing just out of view watching him make an ass of himself. The situation might be a bit better if he didn’t have the crush that he had - the one that he pretended he didn’t have because if he admitted it then all his teammates and friends would be right about what a fuck up he was - that he had fucked up everything with y/n almost immediately. 

He shook his head, this was not the time to dwell on that thought, he needed to pull himself together and stop mentally rehashing the same things. It had been like more than a year anyway, and he was lucky that she was even willing to talk to him. But after the first econ exam grades posted, he had swallowed his worries and asked for her help.

It hadn’t been easy either - she was busy packing up, talking to her seatmate, who also seemed to know what was going on and before he could even say anything, she had glanced up.

She had looked him over for a split second, “Hey, Gyu,” she leaned on the table with her face resting in her hand like she just knew he was going to ask something.

He could only hope that he didn’t flush the brightest shade of red, “Hey, uh,” he hated being nervous and stamming or speaking too fast, “can I talk to you?” he asked quietly, not wanting to announce to everyone that he was absolutely sucking ass in this class. 

She quirked an eyebrow at him but nodded, “Yeah, why not - I’m in a good mood,” he bit his lip wishing that that was some cryptic phrase, but he knew it wasn’t. The last time they had talked hadn’t been good and it had been late the previous fall when they met - and now he was talking to her after another fall semester had passed. Still, he nodded, he was fine with whatever she said.

He waited for her to grab her bag and wave to her friend who gave Mingyu a less than kind once over before glancing back at her with a skeptical look. Regardless, she turned back to him, “Come on then, I need to grab some coffee, assuming that works for you?” she asked, voice a bit sharp.

He nodded and tagged along as she crossed the lecture hall in easy, long strides. He wondered how it escaped him that she was also tall - not his height, but tall. And from behind he noticed the little wispy hairs that had escaped her ponytail and gently touched her neck. He chewed his lip lightly wondering how he had managed to tell her he wasn’t interested. But he had - he had looked at her and said he wasn’t into long term things, and they hadn’t talked after that. 

He could see the scene all too well in his memory - the way her easy smile had dropped away, and her face had hardened instead - the way she had nodded, and said ‘oh’. He regretted it the moment he had said it, but he had seen her phone when she had gone to the bathroom. He hadn’t meant to, but he had seen all the texts from some other guy asking her where she was - that he missed her. Mingyu could only guess that he was some rebound fuck, at best. It had hurt because they had gone out a few times, and he had been excited for her to stay over because his roommate was out of town. He had loved being alone with her and the way they had made out - he had thought maybe it was serious. 

He had just felt so dumb then, lying back on his bed, feeling her warmth slowly dissipating from the spot next to him - he felt dumb and upset, not really angry. She was out of his league to begin with. He knew that he was a bit of a dork, like naturally - dorky and clumsy. And she was beautiful and smart. He knew it was better if he just made up something and ended it before he really got carried away with his own happy thoughts of her. 

Besides, when she inevitably got back together with this other guy, she would just drop him anyway. So he was really just doing them both a favor by ending things where there were. He was surprised by her though, the way she had stared at him for a moment - the way she had looked like she wanted to say a lot more than she did - but she had just shaken her head and muttered something to herself as she got dressed and walked out of his room. 

He stayed in the rest of the weekend, feeling like absolute shit. Hoping that somehow it was her texting him every time his phone went off because maybe she would call his bluff and - he had stopped his thoughts there and decided he just needed to accept that he wasn’t for her - some guy named ‘Soonie’ was though. 

He moped around during his holiday break too, and even for a few days when the spring semester started, but then soccer practice had started in earnest and took up all of his brain power. The games had started in the fall, but the intense games were set for spring. The weird thing was, he had been certain that he had seen her at some of the games. He knew there wasn’t a ‘Soonie’ on the team though, so he had never really figured that part out, and he tried not to dwell on it.

But now he had successfully made it out of her apartment and back to his own to shower. He really hoped that she somehow hadn’t noticed him sleeping in her living room, but he knew that was ridiculously unlikely, which meant that she had just let him sleep there. He pressed his forehead against the cool tile remembering one terrible fact - he had woken up with a blanket. She knew, he thought, of course she knew, she had given him a blanket to sleep with - fuck - he was fucked, that was the only conclusion. And he had to show up to class too, he rolled his eyes at the thought.

He made it to class just in time - right as the professor was closing the door. He rushed to his seat and only after he was settled did he dare to glance over at her - she wasn’t paying attention. She was busy taking notes, but he noticed what she was wearing. He choked on air, coughing and making a few people stare for a moment, but he didn’t care, y/n was wearing his hoodie.

It took him a moment to regain his composure, or what was left of it because his mind was whirring - why was she wearing his hoodie, he wondered. He couldn’t pay attention during class. And when there was a break, he started after her, planning to ask for it back, he guessed - he didn’t know what his fucking plan was. But she had already left the room. He whined quietly, feeling foolish and exposed.

But when he turned around her seatmate was there, “Looking for something?” he asked, voice acidic.

Mingyu started to shake his head but the seatmate suddenly held up his phone and it was a picture of Mingyu asleep on her couch - he swallowed hard and reached for the phone, only for the guy to yank it away.

He smiled, “You’re lucky she still thinks you’re cute - I told her to kick you out, like any other trash,” he finished and turned to walk away.

Mingyu felt like he had been smacked - some random guy was calling him ‘trash’ and he had Mingyu’s photo - he was suddenly feeling all his nerves hit at once. He tried to breathe through the anxiety, even though he could feel his heart pounding. He jumped when he felt someone touch his arm - her.

He couldn’t even make eye contact. He could feel all the panic rising and washing over him like a wave. He didn’t exactly know what happened next, but he knew he was suddenly in the bathroom dry heaving.

He didn’t care about his grades anymore. He had only made it back to his room because Seungcheol had shown up with his inhaler. And he had gone into Mingyu’s class and collected his bag, saving Mingyu the immediate embarrassment of returning to class.

He found himself lying on his couch, the tv playing lightly in the background while Seungcheol played some game. Mingyu knew Seungcheol was there to keep him company and make sure he didn’t lose it again. He didn’t ask what was wrong or what happened. He just stayed close and ordered food for them.

It was the next morning before Mingyu even realized he didn’t have his phone. He heard his alarm and immediate grumbling from Seungcheol as he turned it off. Mingyu imagined going to grab his phone, but he had the annoying feeling that that would cost him something - probably an explanation. He decided he was okay without it.

He curled into himself and went back to sleep, only waking up again when Seungcheol woke him, “Seriously, please fucking answer her - she’s driving me insane,” he dropped Mingyu’s phone onto his stomach.

Mingyu groaned and rolled over, not sure who “her” was. He vaguely wondered if maybe it was his Mom or something.

He didn’t think about it again until that night, when he went to eat with Seungcheol, Jeonghan, and Joshua.

He had slept most of the day. And according to Joshua, he was required to shower and change clothes if he was going out with them - he couldn’t look “depressed and shit” because it was “killing the vibes.” He didn’t mind cleaning up, but he sometimes found Joshua’s bluntness annoying.

He showered and changed into loose fitting black pants and a black tee. He pulled on his high tops and a jean jacket as he walked outside to meet the other guys. He was quiet as they walked along, barely speaking until they were in the restaurant and he had to place his order for food and a drink.

He still felt like shit, so he started with beer. He had had several when he felt his phone buzzing. He had been ignoring it since Seungcheol gave it to him. But now it wasn’t a text, it was the call screen. He practically threw it off the table trying to silence it completely.

When he glanced up, he realized Seungcheol was watching him, “Did you ever answer?” He asked in that nonchalant way he had.

Mingyu knew him well enough to know he was interested, and he had probably told Jeonghan and Joshua since both were suddenly very quiet - they were all waiting.

He shrugged, “I’m not in the mood,” he imagined he sounded serious.

But that idea was quickly shattered as Joshua finally took over, “So what happened anyway?” He sipped his drink like it was the most normal question.

Mingyu rolled his eyes, “I’m sure you already know,” he glanced at Seungcheol, knowing he was a traitor.

Jeonghan spoke up, “No, actually, none of us know why you had a panic attack in the middle of your class,” he spoke softly - for once he didn’t appear to be teasing.

Joshua coughed, “Well, that’s not exactly true,” and he unlocked his phone to show a group chat that included the picture Mingyu had seen the day before - him falling asleep at y/n’s. There he was slumped over, cheek pressed to his textbook, and a dark green blanket tossed over him.

He glanced quickly and noticed the sender was ‘Soonie’, with the message “did you actually say he’s cute.” Mingyu saw the message underneath from y/n saying “yes, he’s cute - what about it???” and asking if she should wake him. Apparently, no one thought she should, at least in the gc.

Again, Mingyu just shrugged, “She’s helping me with econ. I didn’t mean to fall asleep,” he huffed.

Joshua sighed, “You have to know it’s not the falling asleep part,” he glanced at Mingyu in a judgmental way, “It’s what happened in your class, when you saw her and uhm absolutely lost your shit,” he smiled sweetly as he said the last part.

Mingyu rolled his eyes, “Yeah, well I wasn’t expecting to have someone shove that photo in my face and tell me how she should have kicked me out, okay?” He knew he was talking way too fast, “and I wasn’t expecting her to come to class wearing my hoodie either - I just wanted to ask for it back,” he went back to sipping his drink.

Seungcheol was still watching him, “She’s been texting since your class yesterday - I had to force you to take your phone because I couldn’t handle any more texts asking if you’re okay or not,” he swirled his drink, avoiding eye contact as he added fuel to the fire.

Mingyu was quick, “You could have just answered that I was fine,” he shot back.

Seungcheol snorted, “I’m not answering the texts you want to avoid, especially from y/n,” he finished.

“What does that mean? Especially from y/n,” he quipped back, feeling insulted for some reason.

He saw the collective eye rolling from the other three, but it was Joshua who responded, “Because we all know something happened between you two - you were all cute and disgustingly sweet and then, suddenly, out of nowhere, even mentioning you around her was like setting off a bomb,” he was staring at Mingyu as he spoke.

“I don’t think we were all that cute” —

Joshua and Jeonghan cut him off with groans, talking over one another to tell Mingyu just how cute and gross he and y/n had been the year before.

The thing that made it through clearly was the reminder that before anything, Mingyu had the habit of giving y/n back hugs at parties. He knew they were notorious for being beer pong partners, but even if they were just waiting to play, he had the habit of pulling her close against him.

He shook his head, “It wasn’t like that,” he didn’t care what history they were throwing at him.

Joshua laughed, “Dude, we all watched you - you were like attached,” he laughed again, “just admit you’re down that bad, it’s not the end of the world - I mean, she’s hot, either admit you’re still into her or say you’re over her so at least Seungcheol can take a shot,” he giggled softly.

Mingyu was quick to look at Seungcheol - he could feel the heat come into his cheeks.

Seungcheol’s eyes widened, “Dude!” He was fast to call Joshua out, “I’ve literally never said I’m into her,” he had the look of pre-rage-Seungcheol - his eyes were wide and his normal cuteness was gone. He was glaring daggers at Joshua.

“You’ve never really had to say it though, have you?” Jeonghan asked in a whisper, giggling with Joshua.

Mingyu felt his mouth go all dry at once. It had never crossed his mind that anyone else was into her, well not any of his friends at least. But it suddenly made sense why she would have come to some of their soccer games. She was into Seungcheol.

Mingyu blinked slowly, and nodded, “Yeah, look I’m going to head home,” he knew he sounded weird. But it didn’t matter.

He was up and out the door before any of them could say anything. He was almost out of earshot when he heard Seungcheol’s sudden outburst of “why the fuck would you tell him that?” He had left money on the table. He didn’t care what happened.

He planned to go home, but there was a text that caught his eye. Caroline. They had a bunch of classes together. They talked at parties. She was hot. Seungcheol could have y/n all to himself, and Mingyu could move on.

[caro 21:07]

hey come save me from boring party talk plzzzzzzz

He nodded to himself. Yes, a distraction was what he needed. He silently thanked her as he typed a fast response.

[mingyu 21:08]

sure but where am I going??

She sent him the address. He asked the driver to change his destination.

He was glad he had showered and made a small effort to get dressed. The party was loud. But he found Caroline easily enough - she was hard to miss if he were honest. She was quick to hug him, pressing close to thank him for showing up. He just nodded, not in the mood to yell over music and other voices.

She wound quickly through various rooms before going upstairs. He almost pulled back, but then again, he wondered why he bothered - he wasn’t seeing anyone.

She pulled him along to a door, but it was odd when she knocked on the door. He watched the door crack open and heard the soft, “Caro, I’m not really in the mood,” from inside.

Caro leaned against the door to say something in a hushed tone. Mingyu thought about leaving, but he felt the tight grip on his arm. He was maybe a bit slow in realizing Caroline had no intention of letting him slip away without a good reason, looking at her hand, he could only assume the acceptable reason was maybe the house being on fire.

He found himself being pushed through the doorway, “Look, you two need to chat for like ten minutes at the very least and if that’s too much, then okay, fine - you’re maybe the most stubborn people to exist,” she had shoved Mingyu inside the room and closed the door by the time she finished her sentence.

He glanced to see he was in a bedroom, not one he knew. And there was y/n sitting on the floor. He was almost annoyed.

She was dressed for the party. She was always cute, but he liked her tendency towards jeans and slightly boyish tops that she managed to make very girlie - like the little collared sweater she was wearing and the fact that he could see through the thin knit to the lace bralette beneath.

She glanced at him for a moment and sighed, “I guess you didn’t die,” she rolled her eyes and looked anywhere but at him.

He bit the inside of his cheek, knowing he kind of deserved a bit of attitude. He sat down across from her and swallowed, waiting for her to at least look at him. He was glad he at least had a beer.

She glanced his way after a few moments of quiet. She watched him for a minute or two, and then she moved all at once to be in his lap. Her arms encircled his neck. He couldn’t help but breathe in the scent he had been missing. His heart immediately beat faster.

He felt her fingertip trace against his lower lip, “What did I do?” Her voice was so soft.

He stared for a moment, “I’m just a rebound,” he saw the immediate confusion on her face.

She almost laughed, “Rebound from who?”

He gently loosened her hands from his neck, “Soonie,” he felt like it was obvious.

“Soonyoung?” She sounded immediately baffled, “What are you talking about?”

“I saw his texts to you - ‘babe i miss you - you know i’m jealous - come home,” he mimicked.

She laughed, and immediately clamped a hand over her mouth, “Holy shit, seriously - that’s why you went all ‘I don’t like long term’ on me?”

She was staring at him. He flushed, “It seems like a real reason to me,” he couldn’t understand why he felt dumb.

She glanced around for a moment like she was searching for the words she needed, “Gyu,” she paused, “Soonie is - Soonie and me?” She shook her head, “we would both rather die than, oh my god, that’s just how we talk!” She had grabbed his forearms, “it is not whatever you thought, okay - I swear,” she let go of him to cross herself for emphasis.

He flushed slightly, “Then who is he?”

“A close friend - like since childhood friend - he sits next to me in econ,” she waited for a moment, “trust me, it’s impossible for me to be his type,” she looked almost on the verge of tears.

Mingyu thought of the guy who seemed to hate him for no reason, “So a childhood friend who seems to absolutely hate me” —

She cut in, “Seriously, there’s nothing between us - we would literally kill each other,” she sounded intense now.

He shrugged, “Sounds like you’re just waiting to get together,” he wasn’t in the mood.

She stared at him for a long moment, “Trust me, there’s no waiting around for one another - we aren’t like that, like for one it would make things so weird since we’re step-siblings,” she made a terrible face, “not to mention it’s literally posted on our old school’s website where we got into a fight during a debate club meeting - they had to drag us off stage,” she was less imploring, but still close, watching him as he absorbed what she was saying.

Mingyu wasn’t sure what to think. He believed her. He would have probably believed her without the explanation, if he were honest. But it didn’t change the way he felt. It didn’t change the sinking feeling in his stomach that told him he had wasted time.

She stared at him, waiting. The quiet stretched out between them. She sighed, “Do you want me to call him? You can see pictures of our family?” She offered before sighing and crossing her arms. She looked defeated.

He was surprised when she suddenly stood up, “Okay, anyway, so I’ll see you around.”

He didn’t know what to say. He had carried the thought around for so long. He was going to come upstairs with someone else. He felt stuck.

He ran a hand through his hair, before glancing back, “Seungcheol likes you - he’s just been waiting around to figure out what’s wrong with me, I guess.”

He couldn’t see her face, “Ahah, uhm,” he could hear the pause, “thanks I guess,” he could hear the small tremble in her voice.

He closed his eyes, knowing what he wanted to do. But somehow he couldn’t make himself move. Instead, he silently wished for her to come back - he pleaded mentally for her to come back. He wanted to feel her arms around his neck again.

And then he heard himself, the deep, shaking sigh. He was sure she had slipped out the door and was already downstairs. He turned around to see her still standing, her back against the door.

She watched him, “Do you really want me to just leave?” She asked softly.

He shrugged.

She walked back to and gave him a small shove, “I’m here with you, and I’ve been waiting around, trying to to figure out what I did,” she whispered.

He shook his head, “You didn’t do anything, okay?” He was exhausted, “It’s my fault - I fucked everything up, and now I’m sitting here, knowing that I fucked everything up even more than I originally thought, okay? It’s even worse,” he pulled his knees close and hid his face.

He heard her scoff, “Do you think I would have even helped you if things were so impossible between us?”

He didn’t answer.

He felt her hand lightly on his head - she ran her fingers through his hair, “Look, come downstairs with me - be my beer pong partner and hug me close like you normally would, okay? Think of it as a re-do. We can re-do that night and the day after and leave out the misunderstanding - just pretend it’s not part of our timeline,” she whispered, pulling his hair gently.

He looked up at her. She reached down, smoothing his bangs, “Please,” she offered. He felt himself nodding. He wanted nothing more than to wipe away all the time he hadn’t been with her.

xx

He woke up the next morning wrapped around her. He pressed close, nuzzling her neck, kissing the sensitive, exposed skin. She was sleeping in his tshirt and her underwear.

He imagined dipping his hand down, under the delicate fabric of her panties to tease her clit and her pussy. But he heard the soft snore, the one that wasn’t from her. It was the one from Seungcheol.

Mingyu was curled around y/n, and y/n was curled around Seungcheol.

Mingyu chewed his lip lightly, knowing it wasn’t worth it to upset the balance right now. Especially when he barely wanted to acknowledge there was a balance to maintain. He pressed closer to her, knowing now that she hadn’t needed him to tell her anything about how Seungcheol felt - she knew perfectly well. He sighed gently, wondering how he had set this all in motion.

.𖥔 ݁ ˖ִ ࣪⚝₊ ⊹˚ .𖥔 ݁ ˖ִ ࣪⚝₊ ⊹˚ .𖥔 ݁ ˖ִ ࣪⚝₊ ⊹˚ .𖥔 ݁ ˖ִ ࣪⚝₊ ⊹˚ .𖥔 ݁ ࣪⚝₊ ⊹I ˚ .𖥔 ݁ ִ ࣪⚝₊ ⊹˚ .𖥔 ݁

a/n: i started writing this last year and just found it in my drafts - i think i originally imagined this as a sick fic but tbh it went off the rails in a not fun way, and it still maybe does go off the rails, but idk gyucheol x reader seems fun so why not

tell me if you want the seungcheol pov..better! should they be rivals??? or throuple sandwich..or throuple who doesn’t acknowledge it - y/n just yk makes plans with them equally - they’re adults - no one is jealous ;-;

♡ kat

[rainbowsky]

Hey rainbowsky, how's the legend of condor heroes really doing? it's hard to get a sense of it across the platforms and I'd love your factual information of it. Looked like Nezha 2 was blowing everyone away, but I know XS's movie was sold out like crazy. Any metrics we can trust out there?

Hi itisasitshouldbe, hope you're well! 😊

I'm a bit surprised you would ask me for this information because I'm not somebody who fixates on things like this. I do follow some of it, but not to the degree where I'm going to be able to give you a definitive, detailed breakdown. This is not my kind of thing.

In my view, people - especially fans - who are breathlessly comparing and competing LOCH with other films are being unrealistic, and actually doing the film a disservice.

Maybe people just aren't aware of what Ne Zha 2 is and don't realize how big of a competitor it is. It is a sequel to the most popular animated film to ever come out of China. It would be like putting Legend of the Condor Heroes up against Shrek during a holiday when families typically go to the movies together.

LOCH is a genre film, and a bit of a nostalgic throwback to a bygone era of wuxia. As such, there was never any chance that it would be as dominant as some of the other blockbusters. Holding it up against mainstream juggernauts and lamenting that it's not doing as well makes no sense.

In its category it has been doing exceptionally well. It has already broken many records, and last I saw it had already become the second highest grossing wuxia film of all time. It might have already broken that record.

In terms of box office for Spring Festival I think it was at 4th place last I saw, which is really strong considering what it has been up against and the amount of showings it's had compared with other films. And it's only been in theatres for a few days.

I see a lot of people freaking out over the number of screenings it has been getting, claiming it's being intentionally held back. While there is definitely some competition there, it's also important to remember that theatres are businesses, and they will screen what is most in demand. The number of screenings is more a reflection of the genre and audience interests than of any other factor. Conspiracy theories are frankly pointless and frustrating.

The film has already made over half a billion, and will make much more in the coming weeks and months. It is exceptionally well reviewed, and even superfans of the novels are singing its praises.

By every measure, it's doing exceptionally well. I urge fans to focus on the film rather than on bean counting.

To me, this film is most valuable for what it offers GG. The relationships he has made, the skills he has learned, the experience he has had, and the opportunity to get in front of mainstream audiences with an IP they understand well, and be able to prove himself as an actor (which he absolutely has done here)... all of these things are more important than box office returns.

[whispsofwind]

I read the first 4 books - well 3 and half tbh, I never finished the fourth one because the incessant onslaught of the iron islands chapters grew very boring very quickly. I actually loved the first one, it just went downhill from there

Tbh I found a number of problems (personal opinion mind you, you are free to disagree)

1) the nihilism gets really irritating really fast. Yeah yeah you think most people are horrible. Yeah women oppressed very badly across history. Nobility and heroism dead. We GET it

2) the whole killing characters thing. While with Ned I found it genuinely interesting and narratively resonant, I quickly became to become detached because if everyone can die at any time then - why are we following their story exactly? Why are these characters significant to the overarching themes, symbolism and plot? Why are we LOSING TIME WITH IRRELEVANT POV CHARACTERS THAT ADD LITTLE TO THE NARRATIVE AND ARE JUST THERE TO PAD TIME AND SHOCK READERS?

3) the worlbuilding not making sense in the series that prides itself on being hyper realistic as suggested above, and guess what 50 new subplots every 5 chapters do not make this world more Immersive, they just make it meandering.

4) and the most irritating thing is how GRRM is lauded everywhere as this brilliant innovator of the genre when he is really not. He is just a worse Ken Follett with a bizarre beef with Tolkien because (his words not mine) Tolkien didn't bother to explain how Hobbits fuck (I am assuming like normal people, Martin, and with gusto), and what Aragorn's tax policy was (Martin do I really need to explain to you the concepts of Divine Right to Rule, religious themes and Aragorn being a subversion of the classical fantasy hero from previous fairy literature- oh whatever I am well aware it was a provocation).

And the funny thing is, gritty dark fantasy has existed ever since fantasy existed. Tolkien himself briefly dabbled with a grimdark sequel to LOTR before abandoning the project as "it wasn’t worth it"

Like don't get me wrong, whatever gets people to read, I suppose. I just really cannot stand to see this man elevated as a revolutionary of the fantasy genre when he is not.

(Then again same thing happened with the magical boarding school subgenre and the wizard books so I guess people simply don't know fantasy period).

I did enjoy the one about Targaryen history that was written like historical records though. It was an interesting exercise in prose.

As for the show, yeah I didn't watch it, I admit. The ridiculous amounts of gratuitous tiddies in the first season turned me off because quite Frankly if you need that many added sex scenes to attract viewers I am going to assume you do not believe in the intrinsic value of the source material and if you Don't, then why should I?

Someone over on Discord asked, "I'm morbidly curious: How BAD is A Song of Ice and Fire in terms of the authenticity George claims it to be?"

My reply was straightforward:

The long and the short of it is that ASOIAF is basically a vehicle for GRRM to present both his rape fetish and his Hobbesian view on human nature and has less historical accuracy than Frozen or most other Disney movies.

That's actually a good way to think of it, now that I've said it--he's Family Unfriendly, they're Family Friendly, but both have the same relationship with History: just Pure Aesthetic with no consideration for how the worldbuilding would work.

[mach-talk]

JRWI fans, tell me if this is something that makes sense to you: I think Dakota Cole is the first superhero in a VERY long time to feel like an actual superhero.

⚠️Spoilers ahead for both seasons of Prime Defenders, if you haven’t finished it already, what are you doing here?! Go watch it!!⚠️

I think Grizzly did a phenomenal job in his research of superhero media before making Dakota, and that research really paid off for how real Dakota feels as not just a hero, but as a person. Season 1 made me fall in love with the characters and the story, but as an avid Marvel skeptic, season 2 made me believe in the superhero genre again.

I’ve talked about my disdain for modern superhero movies before, but to condense it, I feel like they don’t really feel like HEROES as much as “the lesser of two evils in a fight that’s destroying a city.” A lot of modern heroes feel too gritty and gloomy, not the symbols of hope they’re meant to be, but only focusing on the reluctance of their position.

Dakota Cole’s story is different to me: we’re able to see all sides of it, the good and the bad, and spend enough time in those moments to feel what he feels. His story feels so perfect to the Hero’s Journey, both in what we start out with and what we learn along the way.

First and foremost, I’m grateful to see heroes that WANT to be heroes again, not just to save one person or some moral obligation, but for the sake of wanting to do good and help others. Prime Defenders as a whole is such a breath of fresh air in the superhero genre for its message, and it gets to the heart of what makes superhero movies good. It feels, for lack of a better word, colorful. In a world of low light and gritty heroes making hard decisions, we get moments like the fight for New Haven where the heroes came together with the sword to defeat the planet, or the showdown with Powerhouse, while we get silly moments like the Wasp Vs Bee debate or the chaos portal in the Winnebago. That doesn’t mean we don’t get dark or gritty scenes, of course- I’m still deeply impacted by Ashe’s sacrifice to save everyone, William’s spiral with his brother, and (most relevant to this rant) Dakota’s surgery. But because we got to see the whimsy and the heart behind the heroes, it just made all of those moments so much more impactful.

Dakota Cole, though, feels to me like the result of dissecting the superhero genre and finding what makes it so appealing and meaningful to people. He is, upon first glance, hopeful and confident, optimistic perhaps to a fault, and wants to see the best in people and bring out that goodness. He starts with a very rigid view of what good and evil is, but as his mindset shifts, we see him open up to other ideas of what goodness means to him.

You’d think this would immediately fall apart when he goes through the heartbreak and disillusionment of losing someone to a villain, and that’s what we see with Ashe’s loss in season 1. He is clearly devastated by the loss, but is the first to believe that they can bring him back. He even says it as some of his last words to Ashe before he becomes The Trickster- “Don’t forget that you have somewhere to come back to.” After the loss, though, he’s only more motivated to save his friend. He goes to train and get stronger, and is the one to suggest getting him back. Throughout season 2, as well, we see the backstory that had been set up throughout season 1 come back to the front, and how it impacts him not only as a hero, but as a regular person. His love for his aunt, his attitude towards others, his willingness to sacrifice…

The first thing that he did for himself, in my opinion, was the heart surgery to keep himself alive, and even that wasn’t all for him; it was largely to help William rather than just staying alive. But he was so desperate to help others that he found the thing he needed to learn most in order to be the hero the world needed: patience. His heart surgery and subsequent training with Master Cole taught him the patience he needed to put his abilities to use.

But I think what his training arc taught him best outside of patience- the lesson that stuck with me the most- was that it is okay to ask for help. In fact, one of the quotes that still sticks with me is the quote from Master Cole: “Sometimes, we can’t carry the weight of the world alone.” He spent two seasons up until this point trying to carry every burden on his own, but this was a turning point for him. He realized that he has a team for a reason, and that he doesn’t have to protect them, and that allowing them to help him will make everyone stronger.

In my opinion, Dakota had the most personal growth out of the Prime Defenders from S1E1 to S2E40. He lost a lot of the innocence and pure optimism he had before, but the wisdom and patience he gained from it turned his passion for saving people and his genuine desire to do good into a more productive and successful energy that could save more lives than before. Sure, he had his silly moments- the consistent Fortnite jokes during his training arc, the goofiness of creating The Purps, etc. But his humor served to deepen his character, and the balance of genuine care and compassion for others with the humor and the struggles he faced (and still faces) just make him such a deep character.

He’s a silly goofy guy and he is one of the best written characters in modern hero stories.

[mc-cookies]

LONG MOSTLY UNEDITED POST AHEAD! tl;dr Eureka’s devs made the unconventional choice to create an imbalanced, volatile, and deadly tabletop combat system, and it helps make the game really good at telling detective stories. If you’re ever making a game that’s inspired by genre fiction, you shouldn’t be afraid to copy tropes that other games don’t normally use. Also, check out Eureka! It’s incredibly fun to read and play, and a master class in thoughtful game design. Full write up below.

One underrated aspect of @anim-ttrpgs’s Eureka: Investigative Urban Fantasy that I think tabletop designers should look to for inspiration is the fact that it doesn’t shy away from the conventions of its genre, even if they conflict with the conventional wisdom of how TTRPGs usually work. Eureka wants to be a toolkit for mystery stories in the vein of Agatha Christie-style mystery novels, film noir, or detective TV shows like Columbo and Kolchak, and it’s willing to bend tabletop gaming tradition to do that in a way that seems limiting, but actually increases the potential for compelling and appropriate stories.

The example that made this observation come up for me is the choice to create a crunchy, tactical combat system where guns and explosives absolutely break the power curve. Usually, in games that are heavily opinionated about combat and dangerous situations, the goal is for the player characters to fight with finesse and skill, often growing in power over time, and to that end there are many viable strategies that all scale massively as the players upgrade them. This is a great way to allow for fights that feel balanced, larger than life, and satisfyingly heroic. It’s also not remotely what Eureka does.

Eureka’s combat isn’t meant to emulate a modern action film, a high fantasy adventure, or a shonen anime. It aims to emulate the deadly, fast paced, environmentally driven heightened realism of action scenes in classic film noir, and to do that, it’s brave enough to ask its players to change their expectations about what a crunchy combat system looks like. Combat moves quickly, it’s physically and mentally taxing on the people involved, it’s character driven, and it is supremely dangerous. That’s abstract, but it’s pretty clear from the rules about weaponry: any bullet can incapacitate an average person in one shot, and explosives instantly kill people within their blast radius.

That’s of course not the only thing driving the danger of Eureka’s combat — another fun figure is that it only takes ten good punches or kicks to incapacitate or kill someone — but I think it’s a good way to get at the core of what Eureka tries to do: it forces you to consider what options actually make sense and create opportunities for interesting stories.

Eureka doesn’t want investigators valiantly charging across a battlefield to push up against their assailants or anything, because the stories it tries to produce are very grounded in depicting how unlikely that is to work. (If a character in a vintage noir film gets shot anywhere in their torso or head, they aren’t likely to survive without intensive medical attention, and Eureka is faithful to that!) Eureka wants people to scope out the location to improve their strategy, make smart use of ambushes and weaponry to get an advantage on people who threaten them, and run away or avoid combat if they come across someone they can’t handle.

This extreme volatility massively limits the reliability of characters’ abilities and ensures that far fewer options are available in combat, which seems like it would be less fun, but it’s quite the opposite. The action sequences that Eureka produces are incredibly engaging and fun to play out, because it makes smart use of tried and true tropes to make fights in mystery stories feel compelling and relevant. Heightened realism, danger, and desperation are important to mystery genre fiction, and Eureka seeks to put the players in that headspace. Fights are swift, violent, and often primarily decided by who had better plans and supplies. That’s by design.

There are a lot of great interactions that are enabled by this design philosophy — if a mafia goon pulls aside his jacket to reveal a handgun in his waistband, Eureka encourages the players and characters to take it seriously, because using a gun is seriously raising the stakes! That’s a trope that’s commonly used in all sorts of media, but if guns were easy to deal with, it would make no sense to worry about it. Creating a system that reflects how threatening guns can be in mystery stories and real life is a great way to avoid ludonarrative dissonance and encourage genuine character interactions, and Eureka is oozing with other design tidbits that accomplish similar things. (Hell, half the trait list is basically just there to allow investigators to embody classic genre tropes, and it’s awesome.)

(Deadly weapons in Eureka are balanced by the fact that they and the training needed to use them effectively are often challenging and expensive to get, especially by legal means — which also allows for some interesting social commentary on how violence is exceedingly easily enacted by the wealthy and powerful, while the self defense of marginalized people is criminalized and villainized — but there’s enough there for a whole other post, and this one is long enough as is.)

All that to say, if Eureka had blindly gone with the prevailing approaches taken by popular RPGs in this area (and many others), it would not be half as good at what it does — it would just feel like a reskin of some other game, but marketed as investigative urban fantasy. Instead, it’s a wholly original toolkit that lets writers, GMs, and players create their own spins on a classic plot structure in a fun and engaging way. Taking risks, thinking about incentive structures, and comparing the stories you want to tell with other media that creates a similar vibe is what takes an RPG from being just good to being great. If you’re designing a game, you can accomplish a lot by knowing what stories you want to create and honing in on why you enjoy them. And don’t be afraid to adapt ideas wholesale, either. Eureka cites multiple full pages of inspirations for the vibes, stories, and mechanics that make up its identities, and it’s a better game for it.

And, I must add, if you’re looking for a game that’s fun, good at telling stories about people investigating mysteries, has a friendly and active community, and doesn’t funnel money to Wizards of the Coast, a subsidiary of Hasbro, then absolutely consider taking Eureka out for a spin! It’s a brilliant take on the mystery genre that gives players and GMs the tools to explore deep, realistic, and sometimes supernatural situations in an easy and character driven package.

[olderthannetfic]

The Tibet v China thing reminds me of something I've been noticing more and more. Not sure if it's a "current day" problem or if it's just more visible. But it seems like people are more and more unable to accept something has both negative and good sides. Take the China V Tibet thing. If they like something from China, they have a huge problem accepting that China itself has massive problems. It's as if something they like can't under any circumstances also be bad. Either all is good or nothing

--

People have always been like this, but there's a particularly strong incentive in a social media environment where you feel like you're always being watched and judged. You can't associate with anything contaminated or you'll get cooties too.

Also... the kind of narrative China wants to build around Tibet is similar to propaganda about... IDK... Hawaii being part of the US or whatever. A lot of the people who are being stupid are already primed to accept this whole genre of "We brought civilization/economic opportunity!" If something is presented as Evil Colonialism within a very narrow frame, they'll have a kneejerk negative reaction, but they aren't really thinking about the underlying pattern and why it's actually bad.

[hobbitkiller]

It’s not a perspective. Cait and Vi didn’t have different goals in that scene. Also, not every scene that sets up joining forces has to literally spell out that’s the intent of the scene. I honestly don’t get your insistence that everything be spelled out for you like you’re a child.

I’m also clearly going to have to explain foreshadowing to you. Foreshadowing is a literary and story telling device that is used to plant an idea in the reader’s/viewer’s mind for later. Introducing the idea that Piltover and Zaun had joined forces before was placing that idea in the viewer’s head.

You are very much reaching with your analysis of Ambessa just being there to raise tensions. You seem to not grasp how stories develop. In interesting, multifaceted stories like Arcane characters don’t show up with a moist ache to twirl indicating evil intent. That doesn’t mean it’s bad storytelling for them to become the major villain. That’s good storytelling, actually. That said, someone familiar with tropes and story structure could easily predict that she was going to become the new big problem.

Again, you keep acting like every bit of setup had to be super explicit in spelling out the two sides were going to fight together and that, if it didn’t it means that wasn’t the plan. That’s not how writing works. You’re supposed to be able to put all of the pieces together.

That said, they pretty explicitly showed where the use of hextech could lead without nuance in the second episode, so acting like that wasn’t set up as a major threat frankly feels intellectually dishonest. Sure, at the time we maybe thought Heimerdinger was being an alarmist, but everything that happened with hextech from that point forward drove the plot more toward that point he warned about. Even when they spell things out for you as clearly as they can, you don’t want to see it.

As for agency, season two was very much the “find out” part of “fuck around.” What happened with Viktor was a result of his dangerous experiments with hextech. If he hadn’t done that, Jayce wouldn’t have been able to use the hex core to heal him. Him and Jayce going their separate ways was the consequence of Jayce weaponizing hextech. The anomaly was the consequence of Piltover overusing hextech. Ambessa’s ability to take over was the consequence of Jinx blowing up the council. Season two was where characters had to deal with the consequences of the choices they made in season one.

None of these consequences were forced. Yes, they had big fantasy/Sci Fi fallout, but that’s because the show is Sci Fi/fantasy. That tends to be what happens in the genre. You could easily replace the implications and fallout of hextech with nuclear power or similar technical advancements that created massive problems in the real world, and an imperial power like the US, or Noxus in the show, taking advantage of social and political division in a smaller country to try to control its land and resources is a common refrain throughout history.

You’re right, the arcane isn’t the main focus. The main focus also isn’t the political strife. Both are devices used to tell the story of the characters. The show is not about Piltover versus Zaun. The show is about how that conflict has shaped the characters. Feel free to read my other posts on the subject.

Not sure wha t your Warwick point is. Yes, he is there to retraumatize Vi in the end. Yes, his agency is taken away. That would be the tragedy right there.

As for Mel continuing the cycle, that’s up for interpretation, I guess. I think the cycle she’s specifically breaking there is the one where “Medarda’s only take.” She ended the cycle where her family raises itself up by taking from others.

Your argument against the acceleration rune doesn’t make sense because the device that could only be made with it was Ekko’s which was, in fact, the difference. Pointing out how everything else is the same actually hurts your argument there.

Also, a big lipped alligator moment is something that comes completely out of nowhere and serves no purpose. Neither of those describe Viktor and Jayce. Do they have to explain the exact mechanics of what happened? Would stopping to go into some technobabble have made the show better? Because we always pay close attention to characters doing that in media right? We’re really in it for the made up technobabble.

Your desire for the show to end in a civil war makes it neither better writing nor what the show initially intended. You like to reference what actually happened in the Jayce Silco scene to try to say it wasn’t foreshadowing (again, because I can only assume you don’t know what foreshadowing is)? What did Jayce say would happen if they actually went to war with each other? Zaun would have been crushed. Yes, it would have been a blood bath on both sides, but a Piltover army with hextech and the Noxians would have either won or would have claimed victory and been dealing with insurgent attacks from Zaun for the foreseeable future.

There would be no reconciliation at all unless the show wanted to really abandon one of the ways it was most grounded, which is how violence and vengeance feed each other. There’s a reason why, after most revolutions and wars throughout history, the country is drawn into another war pretty quickly after. One conflict breeds another.

There’s a reason why regions like the Middle East are seemingly caught in endless cycles of violence—because people don’t generally forgive losing a war easily, because wars are costly in lives and resources, and because generational traumas and wrongs often come back to haunt us. Even if the war ended with a miraculous agreement on both sides to lay down arms, there will be people who lost family who will still want justice—to feel that their loved one’s death meant something.

If, however, people’s loved ones died fighting together, that’s a powerful reason to try to make a positive change. Because, again, people want the sacrifice to mean something. It supposedly partly why Britain and other European countries established services like the NHS after WWII. After living through the Blitz and the destruction, it made them want to create a better future.

You keep complaining that the show largely drops the class conflict story after episode four, and that would be a problem if that was what the show was about. However, given the show is about the characters and episodes five and six are mostly about bringing Jinx and Vi and Vi and Caitlyn back together, it made sense to narrow the focus back down to that family unit. The conflict is still there in the background—it’s in the tragedy of Vander, Silco, and Felicia. It’s in the fact that Noxus and Piltover feel entitled to take Vanwick, but it’s not the focus.

I’m honestly not a huge fan of episode seven, because I’m not a huge fan of TimeBomb, but that was an interesting take on what else could have helped bridge the divide between Piltover and Zaun—the tragic loss of a child and the loss of the technology that further drove Piltover and Zaun. The episode is about the class conflict in the sense that it introduces a world mostly without it, showing that, just like it’s possible to have “good” versions of Jinx/Powder, it’s also possible to have a works where Piltover and Zaun have peace. That was the lesson Ekko took away from his AU adventure, to not give up on a better world—that things aren’t “too far gone.”

I also find your point about Jayce not talking to Viktor weird…you do get that he wasn’t really in his right mind there, right? We also can’t say for sure what would have happened if he hadn’t shot him. Maybe the fallout would have been worse. Maybe Viktor would have made more followers so that there were even more dolls when it came to a head. But, again, Jayce wasn’t in the mental state to have a rational discussion right then.

The conflict does come back in the last two episodes because it is somewhat a question of whether or not Zaun will help—which would be Piltover suffering the consequences of its actions. Now, you’re right, arguably the question would be what choice did they have in the end, but that’s again honestly true to many real life conflicts. You’re stuck working with the lesser of two evils.

As I said, what would have been completely unrealistic would have been if everyone hugged and kissed and had a huge barbecue together with fireworks after the Noxians left. We know from history that old prejudices often return once the battle is over—take how Black soldiers were treated in the US after…I was going to say WWII, but really every American war.

I also honestly can’t help other people deciding Sevika being on the council is supposed to be a resolution instead of a first step. It was clearly not framed as a resolution with everyone sharing mistrusting looks and her looking, frankly, uncomfortable. If people decide to be obtuse and not read the overt visual language of the show, that’s a them problem.

And guess what? The show isn’t about class conflict. Yes, it’s an essential element, a major theme, and vital context. It is not what the show is about. Just like unchecked scientific progress is a theme, but not what the show is about.

You bring up what Silco said about the cycle continuing. My point is not about how all violence will always and forever be no more; it’s about how these specific characters are breaking their cycles. Again, this show is about the characters first, which is why it makes sense that they didn’t solve class inequality in a year. It’s about these characters and their stories.

Really, though, much of this conversation has strayed from the original point, which is that this was the direction that was set up in the first season. You may not like it. You may have wanted it to go another way. But it was, in fact, set up. The memory Heimer has of the horrible fallout from Arcane is essentially what happened. They deliberately planted the seed (which, again, is the purpose of foreshadowing—not explicitly stating what’s going to happen next, that’s just exposition) that the thing that originally brought the cities together was a common enemy. They had this conversation one episode after Ambessa, a war monger from an imperialist nation, was introduced.

Even if the show did what you wanted and went with a civil war, there’s a very good chance it would have developed into Piltover and Zaun versus Noxus anyway. Cait/Jayce would be trying to stop the war on Piltover’s side, but Ambessa would refuse to give up the fight and leave with nothing. This would have caused Noxus to turn on Piltover, and then it would have been up to Zaun to either help or let them take each other out first and then fight the survivors. Maybe that would have been better. I personally would be asking, “Hey, what happened to the existential threat posed by hextech that was also being built up in the first season?” But maybe you’re fine with dropping the whole “arcane” bit of arcane.

“What happened to rebel Vi? Season 2 destroyed her character!”

“What happened to rebel Vi” is that Vander took her to the bridge where her parents died in his revolution and asked her what she was willing to lose. Then she meets Cait who is gentle and kind while still being tough and it makes her rethink how she sees topside. When Jinx tells her she changed too, that’s what she’s talking about.

I’m sorry if you thought Vi was going to be a topside-hating revolutionary in Season 2, but that’s clearly not where her character arc was going. Remember how she forced her way between Ekko and Cait? It seemed very straightforward that was the role her character was taking on.

I feel similar about people who act like the show was betraying its premise because it ended with reconciliation/Zaun and Piltover working together. Again, the fact that two of the most important relationships were between characters from both sides and that they made a point of talking about Zaun and Piltover first coming together against a common enemy was a pretty clear indicator that was the plan.

Now, I get being annoyed that that was what they chose to do. You don’t have to love the creative decisions of media, just like media doesn’t have to compromise its creative direction to satisfy you. But not liking that they went that direction is not the same as the show having bad writing or engaging in character assassination.

Everything Vi did in season 2 was very much in character with how she changed and who she became throughout Season 1. Hell, she used enforcers and Hextech to raid Shimmer facilities before Commander Kiramman ever threw on a beret. So, yes, actually wearing the uniform was a huge and complicated decision that she was definitely not happy about, but it also fell in line with what she had been doing.

There’s meat for another post at some point about the three different Zaun/enforcer partnerships we see in the show: Vander/Greyson, Silco/Marcus, and Cait/Vi; but I’m not going to go into that now.

TLDR: “Rebel Vi” who wants to fight all of topside hasn’t existed since the end of the second episode of the show.

Editing to add that Vi doesn’t see attacking Chem Barons as attacking Zaun; she’s taking down the people who are destroying Zaun.

[toonice113]

Renegade ⋆ ★ Matt Rempe

Pairings: Matt Rempe x Reader

Genre: angst 

Summary: After a heated fight, you finally tell Matt all you’ve been keeping in.

Warnings: none 

Word count: 644

⋆˚࿔ tina's note 𝜗𝜚˚⋆ a short blurb of something longer i could write but probably won’t because college sucks, full angst because i'm PMSing and been crying and getting angry at the stupidest things ever (and also not so stupid things because the world sucks rn) 

“I don’t know what you want me to do” Matt’s voice is quiet yet the change in volume from your previous shouting match does nothing to ease the situation, in fact, it feels worse

“You never do! And that’s the problem” At this point he’s sitting on the couch while you are leaning on the small dining table in your shared apartment “I moved my life to be here with you and it just feels like we’ve never been further apart” Matt doesn’t say anything, his head is in his hands and you wait and wait for him to say something but nothing comes out so you pick up the bag you had discarded when the fight started and walk towards the door 

His hand stops you as you are opening the door “Don’t” he shakes his head “Don’t go” 

“Why? Matt, this is not working, we’re not working, it’s breaking us” Your eyes are filled with tears, and although they were tears of rage before, there’s a deep sadness in them now 

“Okay, okay yeah, you’re right” He says, an exhausted air coming from him “Things haven’t been great lately and I’m sorry, baby I’m so sorry I haven’t been all you’ve needed me to be and I won’t stop you from leaving right now, not if you really think that’s what we need” You look at him, he looks tired, and he probably is since he had just gotten back from a game before you started fighting, his suit still on “But please come back to me, this whole thing, it’s not us, it’s the timing, maybe it’s the wrong time for us to be together, but I can’t lose you completely” 

“Matt” You say, tired as well “I can’t promise you that and you know it, this is not about timing, this has been going on for forever, everytime we fight we just push it down and move on acting like everything is right the next day and we can’t keep doing this, truth is you don’t trust me” 

“I do trust you” His words are sharp, defensive 

“But you don’t, When was the last time we talked, like actually took a moment to talk about something not superficial? We talk about our days, we talk about my work and we talk about hockey, sometimes we talk about tv shows or tiktoks but we never talk about ourselves” You feel silly saying these words, and that’s the reason you haven’t brought it up before, but you know it’s exactly what you need to talk about right now “You often come in angry after a game and when I ask about it you only say it was a rough game and you don’t want to talk about it, and if I was any other person I would get it because you keep this mask up that you are this big scary enforcer with a massive ego that only cares about winning fights, but I know you Matt, you are so much more than that, and sometimes I wish you would feel comfortable enough to talk to me when you are hurting” The words seem to sink into matt as soon as you speak them “I want to be there for you because I love you, but every time you push me away it kills me a little more so no Matt, this is not about timing, it’s about you not trusting me” 

“I-” But he has nothing to say, you’re right and he knows it.

“Matt please, get your shit together so I can love you” With that you let go of his hand and walk out of the door shutting it behind you and not looking back, in the apartment Matt crumbles, he just did it, ruined the best thing in his life because he was too scared to open up.