#is it a haunting if the guy being haunted dupes you into dating him?

[ew-selfish-art]

DPxDC AU: Tim receives an interesting email from DalvCo explaining why the CEO is not to be trusted- It's an internal email and suddenly Tim is experiencing supernatural phenomena. He knows that the two events are absolutely related, but he's going to let the cutie stumble his way through data points and vague threats anyway.

(Sorry this got long lmao)

Tim is exhausted after a long night of staking out a new drug cartel with Hood (which in itself took a lot of energy from both of them to have the patience for the other- things are good, not great)... so right now he's logging into his WE email on the train to his office because he's incredibly late. And while he scrolls and contemplates the failsafes he has to make sure Tam doesn't murder him outright- he sees an unexpected email from Vladimir Masters.

Tim's curiosity is piqued, he'd thought that Vlad would have gotten the hint after Tim dismissed him at that Christmas gala a few years ago. Most people took Tim's snubbing as a fatality in the Gotham socialite scene- Most knew him to be 'an agreeable young man', and Tim's reputation had paid a small price for making Vlad's failed vibe check known to the room. The tabloids blamed it on the champagne glass he had in his hand- Has he mentioned how much he hates Vicky Vale lately??

Tim has a few stops to go and he's pretty sure that he's going to delete the email, but in sleep deprived inspiration, he decides it might as well entertain him while he waits. The letter isn't at all what he expected.

"Hello Wayne Enterprise's CEO Tim Drake, I'm sending you this letter on behalf of the entire Midwest to advise that you, under no circumstances, come into contact with or speak to the CEO of DalvCo Vlad Masters. He is underhanded and utilizes untraceable tactics to procure deals. We have reason to believe you may be targeted in the next few days and hope that you are able to take steps for your own safety to avoid Vlad Masters at all costs.

Sincerely, 👑"

Tim feels bewildered for a moment and then... Like a cat with a new toy mouse. A game was afoot! He needed to track down these hackers, he needed to be their best fucking friend (find out their secrets & Vlads) and he needed to apprehend Vlad ASAP! Untraceable tactics? Tim scoffs, but the challenge excites him.

Arriving at WE, Tam looks ready to throw a knife his way (he reminds her that Pru does it better) and states that if Vlad Masters tries to make an appointment- accept it but give him the run around. Make an appointment and continue to contest it, change it, delay it until Tim is actually ready for him. The lights start to flicker, both of them notice it.

Everytime Tim gets a second to investigate Vlad in his office, the room's temperature drops. Tim notices it, and having experienced a number of supernatural phenomena, he knows it has to be related.

Tim decides not to beat around the bush. He comes back to the office that night equipped with a Ouija board, candles and a bag of other occult accessories. He quickly finds, upon setting up, that there is now a groaning Teenager in front of him- lambasting his efforts and chastizing him for taking a meeting with Vlad. Did he not get the fuckin memo??

Tim quickly begins to ask his questions, grateful to not have to deal with the party game board, and takes diligent notes.

"Right, so, you're just a concerned citizen ghost who knows what kind of nefarious deeds Vlad gets up to, how?" ---

Danny is losing his shit. Here he is, having done all the ground work to tell this guy not to meet with Vlad and he's already got him on the schedule! Danny took a page from Technus' book and transported himself alongside the short email. He didn't get this guy at all! Tim was like, basically the same age and clearly super fucking smart, why was he acting like this was a fucking birthday gift? Scratch that, the dude has a Ouija Board- it's like a lame ass birthday party in here!

Danny cannot help himself but return to the visible spectrum and give this guy a talking to- Which, the atmosphere of a birthday party still doesn't change, for ancient's sake this guy is taking notes with a megawatt smile! He's smiling! Danny just described Vlad taking down like, three American dynasties and the dude is nodding his head along gleefully.

Then suddenly, Danny realizes that he might be on the chopping block. Tim asks his first question and it's not about Vlad at all.

"Er, yeah. Just a concerned ghost citizen." Danny cringes.

"Right, and that's why you hacked into the Mayor of your town's email... Right Tucker?"

Danny blanches, not because the guy knew about Amity Park, but because apparently Tucker's online persona had been compromised. SHIT.

"Uh, I'm not Tucker." Danny attempts to lie- why was he so bad at lying again?!

"Of course you aren't, he's currently playing doomed, but it would have been smart to take the out I offered you. Do you want to tell me your name or do you want me to throw out another random guess? You should know that I've done my homework."

"...It's Danny."

"Certainly not Danny Fenton? Who is, sorry to say it, heir to DalvCo? The same one who totally doesn't have a school record of absences equivalent to well documented town hauntings?"

"Yep." Danny cringes, and giving up the goat, transforms back into his human self, "But seriously dude, you can't meet with Vlad. He'll just... take it all."

Tim blinks at him a few times, and his cheeks flush. Danny desperately tries to ignore that response as well as his own (he knows his ears are red, sue him).

"Right. Well, how would you like an internship? First order of business would be meeting with me and my PA Tam and helping us play ball." The guy has a feral grin. The grin kind of scares Danny, it definitely annoys him and a small part of him is curiously charmed.

"Dude you're not hearing me-" Danny tries before being cut off.

"Yeah yeah, supernatural bullshit is involved, Got that." Tim waves him off. Okay never mind, not charmed at all, Danny is completely annoyed.

"I swear to all the ancients-" Danny has to stop himself to calm down, "Dude consider yourself fucking haunted. I'm not helping you with a suicide mission to talk to the creep and I will be making your ass miserable for deciding to go down this path."

"Is that a promise?" Tim is basically batting his eyelashes at Danny and Danny is desperately trying to ignore that.

"Bet." And then he goes invisible.

"That's cute, pretending to leave me." Tim smirks and Danny can't help but let out an exasperated groan.

As it turns out, Tim is incredibly difficult to spook and his normal haunting methods are not fucking working. Has this guy just, like, seen every single horror movie?

----

Tim knows this is going to be fun, even if it means not going out as Red Robin for a while... Maybe he should get back into his night photography and give the guy a chance to enhance the creepiness of Gotham? Maybe start going to restaurants alone and get the guy to join him at a secluded two person table? Tim has plans on plans on plans.

[percywinchester27]

A lot like ‘Us’ (Part-10)

Word count: 5.2K

Pairing: Sam X Reader AU

Warnings: Implied smut, fluff :)

Series Summary: Y/N Y/L/N is eager and honestly, still in awe that she managed to get herself an acceptance from Stanford Law School. On the face of it, her life seems as put together, mysterious and independent as one might hope for. On the insides, she carries the burden of past that haunts her till date. Seemingly, she’d left it all behind; that is until she sets foot in the class of the Law School’s youngest, most promising professor.

A/N: No angst again! And good stuff. I am being very nice these days ;)

The story employs two different timelines. The present timeline for the story takes place in 2014. Please let me know what you guys think :)

Beta: @deanssweetheart23​. Athina, you’re a goddess <3

A lot like ‘Us’ masterlist

10th September 2008

You woke up to something soft tickling your face, almost feather light and pleasant. Opening your eyes, you found Sam’s arms wrapped around you, nestling you in them. A glowing warmth spread through your body as you remembered last night, his lips on your skin, and the feel of his hot breath on your face. The way he had called out for you was enough to raise goosebumps on your skin now. And he’d said he loved you. Your heart thrummed in your chest at the memory.

Slowly, you removed his arm from over your body and slipped out of bed. You wanted to kiss him on his forehead or the point of his nose but Sam looked so peaceful you didn’t have the heart to wake him up. 

You pulled over the T-shirt and the boxers Sam had lent you last night and headed down to the kitchen. Maybe it hadn’t been the best idea to skip dinner after a morning of hangover because your stomach was churning weirdly. 

Would everything be different now? After last night. You felt like your heart would burst from all the love you were feeling. Without giving the task at hand much thought, you fried some eggs, toasted the bread and put the coffee pot on a boil, wondering what Sam had for breakfast. 

With an excitement that you had never felt before, you carried the tray laden with food upstairs, wondering how to wake Sam up. As it turned out, Sam was already sitting up, a confused expression on his face. The sheets were bunched around his waist and the sight of his naked torso made your face feel hot. When he saw you, his eyes lit up, a smile replacing the frown.

“Here you go,” you said, placing the tray before him and then joining him on the bed.

His eyes softened. “You didn’t need to,” he said, gesturing towards the food. “Not seeing you here, I was starting to worry that last night had been a dream.”

“Only the best dream of my life,” you muttered, pouring his coffee. “Black with half spoon sugar. Just like you have it.”

Sam was still stuck on your words. He took the cup from your hands and placed it back on the tray, then pulled you to him. “That’s just it. I didn’t want it to be a dream. Even if it was the best dream ever. All dreams, even the best ones end when you wake up. But with you… I don’t ever want this to end.”

You reached out and kissed him. At first he was surprised, then he leaned into it. Kissing Sam was like a breath of fresh air for your soul. If it was left to you, you would spend an obscene amount of time kissing him.

“This is one way to start the day,” he chuckled.

“Mhmmm…” you sighed, handing him the coffee and starting on the eggs. 

“Funny that Jo didn’t turn the place upside down looking for me,” you wondered idly. You should have told her where you were last night.

“I called her when you got here,” Sam said. “When er… when you were having a bath.”

Sam was always so thoughtful. Last night it hadn’t even occurred to you to let Jo know, about the acceptance or the fact that you were here, and you weren’t particularly proud of it. Absentmindedly, you scooted closer to Sam and like it was the most natural thing to do, he put his arm around you. The heat coming of his skin and his scent was so comforting, you all but melted against his side. A girl could get used to this.

“Hey,” Sam nudged you with his lips pressed in your hair. “You know that NC Central is only a seven hour drive from New York, right?”

Of course you knew that. It was a great school, but it was also on the East coast, where Sam would be. You nodded against his neck, lightly tracing the hard lines of his stomach. 

“I could drive over the weekends to see you.” There was hope in his voice.

“I wouldn’t have it any other way,” you smiled at the thought of it all. A new school, a new life with Sam in it. You thought of happy weekends and flinging yourself into his arms whenever you saw him. You pictured his wide smiles, and the joy in his eyes when he saw you. “I could hop on a bus on Friday night and be there in New York in the morning. You’d show me around, wouldn’t you? I’ve never been to such a big city.”

“You have no idea,” he said. “I’ve never wanted that job more than now. Hell, I’d throw myself into preparing for the bar, if it keeps us that close now.”

“Mhmm.” You huddled closer to him.

“What’re you thinking?”

“About how I’m going to afford this,” you said. “NC central isn’t that expensive, but it’s still a lot considering I have almost nothing to my name. I don’t want to sell off Gran’s house.”

“You want to make it into a bakery, I remember,” he said, gently, then added hesitantly. “Maybe I could-”

“No!” You sat up straight. “Absolutely not. I can’t ask this from you.” You hurried to explain, seeing the slightly hurt expression on his face. “This isn’t about you in any way. It’s very kind of you to offer, it really is. But I want to do this by myself. I’ll apply for a student’s loan. Like I said, the money isn’t an impossible sum. I just need a guarantor to vouch for me at the bank. I don’t want to ask aunt El cause I know she had some bank problems with the diner. She doesn’t trust them very much.”

Sam looked thoughtful.

“What’re you thinking?” You asked suspiciously. “Don’t think about volunteering.” 

His finger was drawing a pattern on your shoulder as he licked his lips. “You know I can’t. I don’t own any property myself. You should ask Dean, though.”

“Dean?” You looked up at him surprised. “Why would he?”

“Why wouldn’t he?” Sam countered. “He might not show it, but he does like you. You’re not asking him to pay for your college, you’re just asking him to be a guarantor. He has great credit, the bank won’t refuse that. It’s not like you’re going to dupe him. I know my brother. Trust me, he’ll be happy to help you.”

When you still looked surprised, Sam took hold of your hand and pressed it to his lips. “Don’t overthink this. You said you wanted to do this by yourself, so you bring it up with him. I promise I won’t say a word.”

“You’re awesome. You know that, right?”

He winked. “I don’t know about that. But I’m sure happy you think that!”

You removed the tray from the bed and placed it on the side table, then moved over to straddle Sam, hands placed on either side of his face. “Thank you for being so understanding.”

In a quick moment, Sam flipped you, so that you were lying on the bed with him hovering over you. He dipped down to kiss the hollow of your neck, then whisper against your skin. “The pleasure is all mine.”

***************************************

“You know, if you keep bouncing on the balls of your feet like that,” Meg said drowsily from the table, where she sat flipping through a magazine, “I’m going to side with Kevin on this. You’re hiding something.”

You put your lunch in the bag, wondering just how to tell her. It wasn’t that you wanted to hide your history from your roommate. There was just so much of it, you had no idea where to start. For now, you just settled for, “There’s this professor. I thought he was mad at me. Turns out he isn’t.”

“Wow. It doesn’t take much to get you all chirpy.”

Just the feeling of six years worth of hell coming to an end.

“Ready to go?” You asked and Meg jumped down from the high stool.

“Yep.”

“Is this the same good looking professor?” She asked out the blue as you reached the campus gates.

“How do you know about the good looking professor?” You narrowed your eyes. You had mentioned Sam only to one person in the apartment.

Meg looked taken aback for a second, then said nonchalantly. “Cas told me.”

“You two are really close, aren’t you?” Try as you may, you couldn’t keep the sly tone out of your voice completely. 

Meg changed the topic smoothly, but not before you saw the faint blush on her cheeks.

Meg blushing? Speak of novelty.

She waved you a goodbye at the entrance of the law building, heading north to the Physics department. Wondering if anyone else in the apartment had noticed, you entered the class for your first lecture. 

Professor Mills was in a great mood today, and she encouraged a debate on whether Legal writing and its syntax should affect how seriously the core content of any litigation is treated. You firmly believed that poor syntax should in no way undermine the severity of any litigation, and made your points with citation. The opposite team consisting of Brad and everyone in Madison’s group tried to put up a strong fight, but you knew you had the moral high ground on that one. Maddy was smiling by the end of it, but the expression on the other’s faces ranged from disappointment to disgust.

Professor Mills mentioned you by your name at the end of the class, lauding you for your points. It was enough to give you the high of the day. You simply loved her.

As the college day neared its end, you were excited for Civil Procedures, excited to see Sam again. Maybe he wouldn’t ignore you now. Maybe he’d actually look at you and smile. Your eyes were eagerly glued to the door, waiting for him while everyone chattered in the background.  

It wasn’t Sam who came in. Instead, the TA Paul announced that the lecture has been cancelled for today and tomorrow. Professor Winchester would take double lectures in the following week to cover it up. 

“Well, dang it!” Meredith cursed. “After that horrible debate, I was looking forward to seeing that chiseled face.”

“You aren’t the only one who’s disappointed,” Lacey said slyly. “Y/N looks like someone kicked her puppy.”

You schooled your expressions immediately. 

Madison rolled her eyes. “Everyone was looking forward to it. Maybe he has something important. Remember he ditched Thursday, Friday on our first week, too.”

“Maybe he’s just playing hooky with his girlfriend,” Rebecca shrugged. You had a maddening urge to slap her. It wasn’t fair to direct all your anger at her; you knew that. However, listening to her words, evaporated the high you had been feeling completely.

How naive of you to think that one small conversation could make everything okay. Maybe he went back home and changed his mind, had seen that the exchange was a lapse in his judgement. Your stomach dropped at that thought. Why did he have to show you a moment of softness, if he was just going to take it all away? It would have been better then, had he continued to ignore your existence. You had been making your peace with it. You didn’t think you had it in you to take one more hit after feeling hope, at last.

Morosely, you started picking up your things.

“Y/N. Don’t forget about the party, tomorrow.”

Madison was looking at you with wide eyes.

You opened your mouth to make up a reason. She cut you off-

“Look, I checked your schedule. You’re not working this weekend. This is your last working day for the week. I’ve made all the reservations and counted you in.”

“Maddie-”

Her brow furrowed. “You’re not going to stand me up, are you? The drinks are on me.”

Looking at her, you just couldn't say no. 

“I was gonna say that I wouldn’t miss it for anything.”

“Yay!” She shot out of her chair and flung her arms around you. Surprised, you put your hand against her back. 

“Told you she’d come,” Madison told her friends. Lacey gave you a smile, Meredith looked disinterested and Rebecca had her back turned to you completely. That summed it up accurately. For the umpteeth time you wondered how their group functioned at all.

Brad, who had been lingering at the table with his guy friends, gave you a smirk.

“Miss Y/L/N finally gracing us with her presence?”

“Oh, butt out, Brad,” Madison shoved him. “If you keep acting like a dick, she might change her mind.”

“Now we wouldn’t want that, would we,” he said under his breath.

You didn’t want any more of their company than what was absolutely required, so you said your goodbye to Madison and left the lecture hall for the day. With your sulky attitude, returning to the apartment wasn’t an option in case you ran into someone. Those guys were very perceptive and you didn’t want to lie to them anymore.

After wandering aimlessly underneath the pergolas of the Quadrangle, you headed to the library. It was about two in the afternoon; four more hours and it would be your shift anyway.

You decided to have your lunch in the closed quarters of the librarian’s room. There wasn’t much to the room except a makeshift bed, a table, chair and a coffee machine. You could sit there and catch up with the essays after lunch.

The on shift librarian wasn’t Molly today, but this other odd hours guy. She was hovering over him, giving instructions. When she saw you, she ushered you to the side. “It’s his first time. I’m training him for the weekend.”

“Oh.” You looked over at the guy. He was clearly an anxious wreck. You felt bad for him.

“Hey listen,” you said, “Is it okay if I use the librarian’s room? I haven’t had lunch and I don’t want to go to the eateries or the mess.”

She gave you a guilty look. “The room is kinda sorta… ocupado.”

“What?”

“See for yourself.” She took hold of your hand and pulled you towards the room in question.

The door was almost closed, save for a small slit. Through it, you could see Sam sitting on the table, multiple books and files scattered around him. He was absolutely absorbed in whatever he was doing, forehead lined in concentration.

“What the-”

Molly shushed you. “Look, I know this looks weird, but he’s in the middle of something. They convicted one of his key clients, and he said he needed some place quiet to figure this out.”

“What about his firm?” You asked the obvious question.

“Client’s not from SF. He’s from LA. Heading to Acton Gris would be going in the opposite direction.”

“Then what about his office here?” You were so surprised that the questions just flowed out of your mouth.

Molly gave an exasperated sigh. “Students. They keep knocking on the door.” She gave you a desperate look. “Please Y/N, let him be. He’s really worked up about it.”

“Yeah, of course,” you assured her. 

She looked grateful. “This isn’t conventional, but he’s one of the good folks around here. I knew him from the alumni fraternity before he started teaching here. In fact, he recommended me for my internship at the LA firm he was working in then.”

That explained why she called him by his first name. She was preaching to the choir about how good Sam was though.

“That’s all fine,” you said. “Just let me know if there’s any way I can help.”

“Molly?”

Both of you jumped at the sound of his voice.

“Molly?” He asked again. “Is that you?”

She pushed the door open.

“Yeah it’s me.” She looked at you. “And this is Y/N. You remember her from the other day, don’t you?”

He smiled at you. It was a tired smile, but it held the mischief of a secret only the two of you knew.

“I remember her,” he said dryly.

All the distress and world ending angst you had been feeling since the class vanished into thin air.

“I-I didn’t mean to disturb you,” you said quickly. “I just came in to check if I could have lunch here. Clearly you are busy working, so I’m just going to go now.”

“You’re not disturbing,” he said firmly. “I’ll clear the table. You can have lunch here.”

“No- no,” you backed off. “Seriously. I can go to the mess.”

“Y/N.” He looked beyond exhausted, as if he hadn’t slept in a while. Even his words were heavy. “C’mon, in. At least sit on the bed.”

Molly poked you in the back from behind and you stumbled inside. 

The room was a mess. There were papers everywhere. Sam was one of the most organised people you knew. If there was that much mess around him, either he had changed drastically in the years or this was really a disaster situation. 

“Tell me if I can help you with anything.” The words were out before you could even think them through. 

He rubbed his hand across his face. “I can’t possibly ask you to do that.”

“You’re not asking me. I’m offering.”

You didn’t know if this fell in line with proper etiquette of how one should converse with a professor, but this was Sam, and he looked ready to drop. To hell with etiquette. You were going to do whatever you could to help.

Behind you, Molly had disappeared back into the library.

He paused, considering your words, then sighed. “Even if you wanted to, this is too much to explain.”

You flung your bag on the bed and rolled up the sleeves of your sweater. “I’ve worked as a paralegal for an asshole boss. I think I can keep up.”

Sam gave you a look that was halfway between impressed and surprised. 

“Well, I’ll be damned,” he muttered under his breath, so softly that you almost missed it. “Alright, here’s the details of the case-”

You listened attentively as he quickly briefed you about this teenage boy, James Feller, who had been arrested for grand auto theft about four years back. The boy testified against the gang, cut a deal with the DA and walked. Now he had been arrested again, and after being let out, jumped the bail. Sam had until tomorrow to fix it or this kid was spending a long, long time in jail. Sam was sure that James hadn’t done it. He had some grabs from CCTV footage to prove his alibi. It only needed to be put together. He might be completely innocent when it came to the theft, but there was still the bail issue to take care of.

“Right, I’ll go through the log to see if there’s anything similar where an underage defendant jumped bail and got out of prison under the jurisdiction of LA,” you said.

“That’s exactly what I was going to suggest,” he said, astonished again.

You shrugged and pulled out your laptop, signing into the library’s archival server with your password. There were a couple of cases that could be cited in context to Sam’s case. You pulled out the soft copies of the litigations and highlighted the relevant extracts. 

“You guys need anything?” Molly was standing at the door. She had her bag on her shoulder. You looked at the clock. It was already six, time for your shift to begin. Where had the time gone?

“We’re good,” Sam said.

“Seriously? You guys don’t need anything? Not even coffee?” She came to stand by the coffee machine. “I’m making a cup for myself anyway.”

You gave in. “I’d like a cup. Thanks, Molly.”

“One for me, too,” Sam caved, too.

“You guys look intense working like that,” she said, filling the pot with water. “Are you making any headway?”

“Y/N found some useful citations.” Sam closed the heavy book before him and leaned back in his chair, rolling the sleeves of his white shirt. The coat had been hung over the back of his chair since long before. You tried not to look at him too much.

“Good on you, Y/N!” Molly said, pulling on three mugs. “How do you have your coffee?”

“Little milk and one spoon sugar,” you said politely.

“Sam?”

There was no response. You looked to see that he was busy with his phone, having not heard a single word of it.

“Let it be,” you suggested, seeing as Molly was shuffling the strap of her bag. “You go on. I’ll manage the coffee.”

“You’re a lovely person!” She noted with just a hint of surprise, then blew you a kiss. “See you later, Chica bonita.”

You poured coffee for him, black with half spoon of sugar, stirred it and carefully handed it to him. He took it gratefully, holding out two fingers as he talked over the phone. 

You grabbed your mug and went back to your laptop. It appeared that Sam was talking to a colleague explaining the things he needed to get ready. He took a sip of the coffee and stopped mid sentence, looking at you over his screen in wonderment.

“Chase, I’ll call you back in a minute.”

You had gathered your stuff in one hand.

“Y/N?” Sam interrupted you, voice oddly tender. “You remembered.”

He was holding his mug out. The warm vapours were slightly fogging his glasses.

“Of course I remember.”

There was no way you would forget.

He saw your things wrapped in your hand and the bag slung over your shoulder.

“You’re leaving?” Disappointment clear in his tone.

You shook your head. “I’m just going outside at the desk. It’s my shift now. I’ll continue tagging relevant extracts and have three sets of printouts ready for you. You’ll let me know if you need more time? I can keep the library running all night.”

“You’re the power wielding person here, aren’t you?”

“Sure am,” you grinned. “I’ll leave you it.”

Once outside, you took a deep breath, letting it out slowly. Being around Sam made you conscious of every little thing… enough to drive you crazy. Maybe it was a good thing that you were going to the party tomorrow. You needed a drink. That thought inadvertently reminded you of Jo- the only sister you’d ever had. If she were here, she would have told you to go for it despite knowing how insane drunk Y/N was and wreck you would be the next day. The memory of her also made you sad, the missing was gut wrenching sometimes. You almost turned on your heel and headed by inside to ask Sam about Jo and about Dean. Were they still together? Did the diner ever get out of the bumpy patch? How was aunt El doing? 

Did they hate you for leaving like that?

That thought brought you up short. You didn’t want to know the answer to that question. There was a small hope within you. If Sam of all people could find it in himself to be civil with you, maybe they would, too. Broaching the topic now would be disastrous. It wouldn’t help Sam right now to lose concentration. Hell, he might do a 180 and suddenly remember that he didn’t like you.

You got back to your desk, filing the cards out for the day before getting to Sam’s paperwork. Though it was a manual job, you did it with utmost concentration, knowing how chaotic courtrooms got and how crucial it was to find the right evidence at the right time. Alongside, you carefully read the suit and arranged the stacks according to the order in which they were needed.

“You know, if you kept going at it like that, you’ll have to represent the boy tomorrow.”

You looked up and your breath hitched. Sam stood before you, his shirt partially untucked and sleeves rolled all the way up till his elbows. The tie was gone and the top button of his shirt was undone. There was a glint of silver against his neck, a thin chain. You wondered where it had come from absently. Without the glasses, and his hair slightly dishevelled, you could see some of the guy you had first fallen in love with.

You looked away quickly, blinking several times, then pushed the stack of printouts towards him. All three copies, arranged as per the appearances of the evidence in the suit papers. The affidavits are all the bottom, along with the supplementary copies.

“You should come down to the office and train my assistant,” he said, leaning over the table so that his elbow rested on top. “He can’t find one paper on time.”

You bit your lip, trying not to laugh.

“Aren’t you having dinner?” He asked, tucking his hair behind his ear. He was nervous. 

“I’m not hungry.” Your stomach was already so full of butterflies, you didn’t think any food could go in.

“I’m already feeling terrible that you’re helping me with this… please don’t skip dinner for it.” There was something about his voice that affected your soul. The sound of his words were different from everyone elses. All words felt kinder, lovelier when he said them.

“Why are you fighting for this kid?” The words slipped past you before you could stop them. You had been wondering this all evening. “I saw the papers. You’re doing this pro bono and not for Acton Gris. This is your own case.”

He didn’t reply immediately and his face had a far away look. When he finally spoke, it was in a reminiscing tone. “I met James when he was a foster kid a few years ago. He got pushed into the racket because of bad influence. When I saw him at the retention centre, he broke down completely. They were blackmailing him by threatening to hurt his little sister. When he first got off, he looked at me like I was some kind of miracle.”  Sam’s face had an awed look, as if he couldn’t comprehend how anyone could think that of him.

“I knew he wouldn’t get into this again. He’s in college now and has basically turned his life around. We have enough evidence to pin a gang member down for framing him. I don’t want anyone at Acton Gris to help me on this because this is my own case. Putting some poor junior on it is just abusing my power.”

He was a good man. That in itself didn’t surprise you because you had always known it. What surprised you was that he had remained one. Sam used to be starry eyed with ambitions and full of a thirst to do the right thing. He had been so idealistic. It worried you that one day he would wake up and see that the world was an even worse place than what he thought it to be. You worried that the ruthless profession might kill some of the inherent goodness in him. After having lost just as much as you, he hadn’t lost faith in the world. He had remained good.

“What?” He questioned and you realised you were staring.

“There you are!”

Jody Mills stood behind Sam, a harried expression on her face. He straightened up immediately and it occurred to you how close your faces had been.

“I went to your house, called up your PA, and here you are.”

“Jody?” He clearly hadn’t expected her.

She handed him the bag she was carrying. “I have dinner for you. I knew you would bury yourself in the case and wouldn’t cook since you’re by yourself now.”

Now. What did that mean? Lacey’s remark about Sam living in family quarters and having a girlfriend came to your mind. You dismissed it quickly.

“Didn’t see you there, Y/N,” Professor Mills came around. “I didn’t know you worked here.”

“Actually I just started a week ago.”

Her eyes flitted to the stack in front of you. “And what’s this?”

“Y/N’s been helping me with some printing,” Sam said.

Professor Mills gave him a once over. “Sam Winchester making students work?”

“It’s not like that,” you defended quickly. “I offered to help S- Mr. Winchester. I have some experience as a paralegal and this was only a matter of making copies.”

“You did a lot more than that,” Sam corrected smoothly.

“I was only joking.” she placed a hand on Sam’s arm and you noted that they were probably closer than just colleagues. Friends even. “You, on the other hand, keep surprising me, Y/N. This looks like solid work.”

You blushed at the compliment, mumbling a small ‘thank you.’ Out of the corner of your eye, you could see Sam gazed down at you oddly. If you didn’t know any better, you might have misinterpreted it as a hint of pride. 

“You have your food!” Jody ordered him and waved at you. “See you in class tomorrow, Y/N.”

“Good night,” you wished her.

Before leaving, she glanced from you to Sam and back again, a peculiar look in her eyes, shook her head and left.

She had packed a burger and pack of oily fries for Sam. You saw his brow furrow at the sight of it and smiled to yourself. Some things never changed.

Sam insisted that you have your dinner, too. However, you made sure that while he sat inside, you had your dinner at your desk. There was only so much of his nearness you could take without having your feelings run wild. Sam needed to go through the case files in peace for the court tomorrow. You let him be, only visiting the librarian’s room once to let him know that you wouldn’t shut the library at all. He was grateful for it. After everyone else had left, you wrapped the shawl around your shoulders and put your head down against the wooden desk. Closing your tired eyes just for a second, you let yourself reflect on everything that had happened today and how one day could be more impactful than a month of one's life sometimes.  

You woke up several hours later. Grey light was starting to filter from the high windows. It was early dawn.

Hurriedly you got up to check on Sam, but the librarian’s room was closed from the outside, you checked in the seating area, too. There was no one there; you were by yourself in the room. 

Back to your desk, you noticed a folded piece of paper placed under your paperweight.

It said-

Y/N,

I have to start from here now to make it to LA in time for the hearing. Didn’t have the heart to wake you up. I can’t thank you enough for your invaluable help.

Regards,

Sam.

You clutched the paper tightly in your fingers, crumpling it in the process. Sometimes a few words were louder than a speech. Sometimes the gesture was even louder.

***************************************   

A/N 2: You guys! THEY TALKED! I know a lot of you have been like ‘They just need to talk’ and well, it happened. So what do you think? Uphill?

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[paceywittergayboatman]

Pacey and Dawson  Gay Subtext at end of Dawson creek season 6

The last two episodes of Dawson's Creek don't make sense if you view without queer subtext. Meaning from a subtextual point of view it isn't what happened in Dawson's creek rather Dawson's tv show. And while that something worth explaining it's not what this meta is about. However, I am not here to talk about that rather the two episodes before that and two scenes of pacey and Dawson that directly address the gay subtext.

In the first scene I am gong to talk about which is in episode 6 21. Pacey has revealed that he lost Dawson’s money and gay chaos occurs.

Pacey: Actually, Jo, um... why don't you hang out for a second, 'cause you're gonna have to hear this sooner or later anyway. 

Dawson: What's goin' on? Are you ok?

 Pacey: Man, and we were just gettin' back to be friends, too. It's such a shame to ruin that. Dawson: What are you talking about? What would ruin it? 

Pacey: Money. Money would ruin it. 

Dawson: W-what happened?

 Pacey: It's gone. Your money's gone, my money's gone, some guy on long island's money is gone—

 Dawson: What--what do you mean gone? That was all the money that I had. 

Pacey: I know it was, Dawson, and I honestly thought Stepatech was gonna take off, I swear to you. 

Dawson: Right. Yeah, o-of course. Otherwise why would you blatantly ignore my request to sell the stock?

 Pacey: Man, I was just tryin' to do the right thing.

 Dawson: Ah, damn it, Pacey, this— [Joey is standing awkwardly in the middle of this looking back from one to the other with tears beginning to well up in her eyes] 

Dawson: [Dawson sighs] You're always tryin' to do the right thing. You're always so eager to be the hero, you never quite see all the pieces of the puzzle.

One of Pacey's character flaws is that he wants to save everyone because he never felt safe at home as a child and Dawson who has known him since he was ten knows this very well. Also, he referring to when Pacey dated Joey and broke his heart.

 Pacey: Dawson... you came to me with your dream because you thought I could help make something of it, and somehow this comes back yet again to the fact that I screwed you over? 

Joey: Ok, you know what, you two? Let's just stick to the topic at hand. Ok, so we can just solve this problem by going inside and trying to get calm... and we'll talk about it.

 Dawson: Joey, talking about this is not gonna solve anything. 

Joey hasn't quite figured out Dawson and Pacey are having a lovers quarrel and just wants them to get along.

Joey: What are you talking about? 

Pacey: He means it's not about money. So fine then, let's just talk about what's really goin' on here. 

Joey: You know what? I see no reason to drudge up baggage from the past just to fill in the moment, Pacey. I mean, let's remember something. This exchange between you and Dawson is purely a business exchange, and I think we need to remember to keep it at that. 

Dawson: She's right. It is business between us, 'cause god knows we haven't been best friends in a long time, have we? 

Pacey: No, we certainly have not. 

Dawson: You wanna know why we're not friends, pace? It's not because of what happened with Joey, even though that turned my world upside down. It's because from that day forward, I realized that you hadn't been my friend for... maybe quite some time, 'cause the second you made us competitors— 

The first, really important thing here is that Pacey dating Joey turned Dawson's world upside down. Dawson is kinda saying here that compulsory heterosexuality made them competitors. But also that they lived their lives trying to reach higher achievements than the other. Although I don't think this is true. I think Pacey thinks of Dawson as the man he's eternally trying to be better than so he doesn't have to admit he's in love with Dawson.

Pacey: That I made us competitors? No. No. Now--now you're rewriting history, Dawson. 

Dawson: I remember when my best friend had a choice and chose to turn his back on me. If you'd ever stopped settin' us up against each other, you woulda realized that you and I are not that far apart.

Pacey really broke his heart he betrayed Dawson in Dawson’s eyes. He just reiterating what I said early about being competitors.

 Pacey: Ah, spare me the speech. You are not gonna convince me that our world's... are anything alike. You're just upset because I broke outta mine. 

Dawson: Broke out of yours? How? By putting on a suit and slavin' away at something that doesn't even interest you? You made money. Congratulations. You impressed us all. 

The putting on a suit line is reference to the way Pacey’s job is referred to a costume as in performance of Heterosexuality specifically under a capitalist environment.

Pacey: How dare you. You know nothing about me, man. I was good at my job. 

Dawson: Then why am I broke?

 Pacey: Because that's life! I didn't make that choice! I have lost, literally, everything! What do you want from me, man? Does this make you happy, that you're back on top now? I mean, you always liked it better when you were in charge, so is this what you wanted? Does this make it all right? 

Dawson can be controling and self centered and Pacey knows that very well. Also you always liked it better when you were in charge has homoerotic undertones.

Dawson: You don't wanna know me, pace. You wrote me off a long time ago. 

Pacey: Really? Really? Back when we were the best of friends? When we were brothers? Was I just outta the house every time you tried to call me over the last 3 years? 

Again Pacey broke Dawson heart by dating joey

Joey: Ok, can you guys just stop it? I can't stand here and listen to you guys do this anymore

. Pacey: I didn't mean to lose your money. I didn't know that that would happen. I'm sorry. 

Dawson: Yeah, so am I. This-- this was just a big mistake from the beginning, I guess.

 Pacey: Heh. Ok.

One more very importamt scene from this episode. Joeys goes to talk to Pacey after the fight.

Joey: You ok, Pace? 

Pacey: You don't have to do this.

 Joey: Do what? 

Pacey: Sit out here with me. I know you'd rather be in the house with Dawson, so why do you just go and help him lick his wounds? 

Joey: Things never change here, do they?

 Pacey: No... because these are the roles we were destined to play. 

The roles he refering to our heterosexuality.

Joey: No, Pace, these are the roles we chose to play. I mean, look at us, sitting out here on this dock in front of the same house we've been haunting for years. We're practically ghosts of our former selves, and honestly, I don't think anyone really remembers what they're mad about anymore. 

Joey saying some very important things in here. One that the theses roles(heterosexuality) are things that they are choosing because then they don’t have to admit there gay. However I don’t quite she understood that Pacey broke Dawson’s heart.

Pacey: Mm, I wouldn't be so sure about that.

Pacey is still thinking like a straight man.

 Joey: Pacey, if I wanted to go back into that house, I would've gone a long time ago. Don't you know me at all by now?

 Pacey: Well, I don't want you sitting here feeling sorry for me. Joey: I don't feel sorry for you. I feel for you, Pacey. 

Pacey: [Sighs] Joey: God, can't you ever tell the difference? 

Pacey: I don't know. [Sighs] I don't know, because you and I have had a very confusing run of things. Especially lately. 

Joey: [Scoffs] Ok. You know, and no matter how much I love you or how long I stay with you, you're only gonna remember the moments when I leave.

 Pacey: Well, you gotta give me that much, because those are pretty much the most painful moments in my life. 

Joey: That's because you ask for them, Pacey. I'm sorry. You do. Your whole life, you spend so much time expecting the worst that you don't even notice the moments when people are loving you, and, Pacey, people spend a lot of time loving you. 

Pacey: Well... with all due respect, Jo, my best friend just walked away from me, but that's not even the worst of it. The worst thing is he hasn't even really known me for the last 3 years, so please, clarify that for me. How does that qualify me as a man with a support network? 

 Thing haven’t been the same since Dawson broke Paceys heart. Joey doesn’t even matter if he cant have Dawson.

Joey: Well, you have a person sitting right here, don't you? But of course, that's not enough. Not until you let it. 

She never be enough because he’s in love with Dawson

Pacey: In what world do I have you? Joey: Look, just because I don't fit into that... place you want me to doesn't mean there's not a place for me, Pacey. 

Pacey: [Sighs]

 Joey: Does it? 

Pacey: Joey, this isn't your fight, anyway. Joey: You're right. You're right. It's not my fight because it's been over for a really long time, Pacey, [Sighs] And it is up to you to make it right. 

She telling him to go fight for Dawson. He needs to repair his relatonship with Dawson.

Pacey: I don't know how to make it right. 

Joey: Well, you're gonna have to figure it out. You know, that's the thing about ghosts. They say that... they don't leave until they're at peace with what they left undone.

So now were on to the last scene of 621 in which Pacey and Dawson talk. Pacey has collected money for Dawson’s movie.

Scene: The ruins. Dawson is there waiting, when Pacey comes walking up and notices Dawson and knows that he has been duped. And goes to walk over to join Dawson.] 

Pacey: Hey. Dawson: Hey. What are you doin' here?

 Pacey: Uh, the same thing you are, I'd suppose.

 Dawson: Actually, I came here to meet— Pacey: Meet with Joey? Yeah, so did I. 

Dawson: I get it. [Sighs] Joey potter: Amateur peace broker. 

Pacey: [Sighs] Dawson: So where is she?

 Pacey: I don't know, but I'd say that she is probably not coming. I think she has this kooky notion that you and I are gonna work this out between ourselves. 

Dawson: Well, that's... not gonna happen. 

Pacey: Yeah, I know. That's what I told her, but we're talkin' about a girl who's never really listened to a single word that either you or I has ever told her, and I did, I said it to her, I said, "look, Jo, things will never be the same between Dawson and I." She doesn't listen to me. You know her, she's stubborn, that girl.

 Dawson: [Sighs] Well, if she's not comin', I'm gonna take off. I've got somewhere to be. 

Pacey: Hold on for one second. [Sighs] Look, you said some pretty crappy things the other day. 

Dawson: Yeah. So did you. 

Pacey: Yes, I did. And I meant them 100%.

 Dawson: I know, so did I, pace, and that's the thing, I don't know how we get past that. 

Pacey: Well, maybe we don't. Maybe that's the point that we just don't get past it, we realize that... we can't go back to the way things used to be, and there's nothing we can do about that 'cause the guys that we are now are worlds apart from the guys that we were back then. The only tie that really binds us together is the fact that we still love the same woman.

So the bottom line of what Pacey saying is that they aren’t the same kids who broke each other hearts. Also the line about the same woman is the compulsory heterosexaltiy talking.

 Dawson: [Sighs] It always comes back to that, doesn't it?

 Pacey: Yes, it does. Yes, it does, and you know what? I don't really regret a single second that I spent with her, and I'm guessing you don't either. In fact, I really consider us pretty lucky... that a--a woman like that would give either one of us the time of day.

They love her she there bestfriend. And there honored to love her and have her in there lives.

 Dawson: You know, it makes sense.

 Pacey: What does? 

Dawson: Why it never worked out for either one of us. All we wanted was her. So much so that we destroyed our friendship... and in the end, all she ever wanted was for us to be friends again. 

Joey is a lesbian and was never interested  in either of them romantically. They  were suffering do to comphet and convinced themselves they wanted her.  They were in love and Pacey broke Dawson’s heart by dating Joey.

Pacey: Ok, I'm gonna ask you this once, and then I promise you I'll never ask it again. Is it possible?

 Dawson: For us to be friends again? [he thinks then smiles] Anything's possible.

Everytime Dawson and Pacey get in a gay fight they do the interaction above. It’s cute but its also flirty and it reads as can we get back to together more than can we be friends. They love each other and even though they fight they never really give up on there love. Anything’s possible is kind of like there cute little make up thing they do when they fight.  The use of anything implys never ending and by extension an eternal love. It’s romantic and also in the actually scene they have eye sex and its very gay. This like them admiting that there in love, they removed Joey from the context of there own relationship and basically said there love is eternal its a great ending to there relationship.

 Pacey: Fair enough. Look, uh, this is for you. [Pacey hands Dawson the envelope with the money.] 

Dawson: What's this? Pacey: Well, I hope you don't mind, but I took the liberty of going to several local businessmen and asking them if they'd like to invest in a very promising young filmmaker, and, by and large, they were all very receptive, though there was this one dentist, and I don't know how she got this in her head, but she seems to think she's an actress, so you might have to give her a little role, like a cameo at most. Just warnin' ya. 

Dawson: Thank you. Pacey: Don't mention it.

So we end the story of Pacey and Dawson on three important points :Joey is a lesbian, Pacey and Dawson are forever in love and they don’t need have the relationship they had when they were kids they can just be boyfriends.

[doof-doofblog]

"You'll Never See Your Little Boy Again!"

Friday 23rd October 2020

Hello again everyone! This will be my final post of the week, I realise it's also late but I hope that now I'm up to date, I can focus more on being on time with next week's posts. I'm looking forward to reviewing this episode as the previous was full of drama, here's hoping this one will be the same!! Let's head straight into it!

The episode starts pretty much where the previous one left off regarding Stacey. Martin and Ruby are enjoying quality time with the children, the sounds of children's laughter can be heard. Martin looks over at his wife and smiles happily that they've finally been able to spend time together with the children. Suddenly Ruby's phone pings and we can that she's received a message from an unknown number with the text "She got the message!" with a photo of Stacey on the floor. So it WAS Ruby who planned the attack on Stacey!! Now Stacey is NOT stupid, she is going to know that Ruby will be behind it! But in all seriousness what steps can she take next? If Ruby is turning to violence, then maybe Stacey needs to play dirty too?! Unbeknown to Martin, his ex-wife he sat outside trying to recover from her shock. As Stacey gets herself together Kheerat finds her and asks if she's okay and if she needs help. Stacey isn't interested in anything but confronting Ruby, but Kheerat is insistent that she gets her wounds looked at, he informs her that his office is just few doors down, he can take a look at it before she goes barging in and confronting Ruby.

The conversation between Phil, Denise, Jack and Ritchie is still ongoing! Phil is eager to get Denise on side, she asks whether the police can help them but unfortunately if they do, it would only mean Raymond going into care. The only way they have any chance of getting Raymond away from Ellie legally is if she agrees to take part in a private fostering arrangement, but they need her to make her decision tonight! They need to act fast for their son. Jack insists that he and Denise need to discuss this in more depth alone, which Phil agrees, but he urges Denise to do the right thing and she hasn't got long to decide.

At the Allotment, Sharon has taken some time on her own to be with Dennis's belongings. Its obvious she still very much misses her son terribly. She holds his hoody close to her, next to her is his wallet, she takes a look inside and pulls out to find the football ticket to West Ham United she bought him before his death. She sighs softly and beings to sob into her sons hoody.

Meanwhile at Kheerat's office, he's managed to persuade Stacey to get her wounds cleaned. Stacey has seemed to have calmed down a bit but she wants to make sure she leaves with enough time to give Ruby what for! Kheerat asks what the whole situation was about and Stacey is surprised that he wants to know, so she explains to him what basically started the whole feud. Can I also just say, it's nice to see two characters such as Kheerat and Stacey, who have very rarely shared a scene, come together like this. As she finishes off cleaning herself up, she gets herself together and makes her way to leave. Kheerat stops her in the tracks and tells her a really good point, the only person who'll be seen as the bad one for ruining the children's night will be her if she barges in on them. She be playing to Ruby's tune basically, if she looks bad in front of her kids, Ruby will only look to be the better outcome. Stacey knows that he has a point, she'll have to play just as dirty and put on a show in front of her children.

At the Mitchell household, Callum and Ben are discussing Phil's chance on getting Raymond. Their concern is if Jack won't agree then there could be a chance that Denise won't agree also and their chance of getting Raymond will be gone. As Phil returns home, both Callum and Ben are eager to hear whether he has any news, he informs them both that she's thinking about it, but where Jack is concerned, he wasn't best pleased to see Phil. Its then that Phil informs them that he needs Callum's help, tonight! Ellie isn't going to sign Raymond over willingly, so they need to find a way to scare her into doing so. Phil pleads to Callum to try and find something that they can use to scare her in an attempt to get Raymond. Will Callum be able to do what he's asking. Over on the other side of the Square, Jack and Denise are also discussing Ellie and Raymond. Jack also knows that Ellie won't had over her Grandson easily, but Jack's concern is also them not being able to carry on their lives without Phil Mitchell in it. In all honesty, Phil won't have anything to do with Denise and Jack themselves, just Raymond - so I don't see what Jack's problem is. If Raymond was his son, wouldn't he be doing the same thing?! He leaves Denise to be alone with her thoughts as he goes to the Vic.

Eventually, Sharon finds her way back to the pub, clutching hold of her deceased sons clothing. Ian is quick to approach her and ask if she's okay. He notices what she's carrying and his face looks as if he's seen a ghost. He assures his friend that he'll be there for her if she needs anything. Sharon smiles softly, thanks her friend and heads on upstairs. As she leaves, Ian once again looks guilty to the core and perhaps a little scared. I know this might sound incredibly daft, but with Dennis's belongings back in the Vic, will Ian end up getting the feeling that he's being haunted by Dennis's ghost? Who knows? Lucy haunted her younger brother, Bobby. Could it also happen to Ian? Which will eventually cause him into revealing the truth to Sharon about how her son actually died.  

Oh gosh the next scene really tugged at my heart strings! It's been such a long time since Stacey has talked about Bradley to anyone! She begins to explain to Kheerat about all the blokes she has had in the past, how it never meant anything other than sex. Until she met Bradley! I think Stacey will always have a place in her heart for Bradley. He was her first love. Okay their relationship was never simple, but I truly feel that they loved each other more than anything in their life. The night Bradley died will always be with her - as she reveals to Kheerat that he died because of her. Which is kind of true, but it happened out of love. It made me a little bit teary when Stacey got a upset - I think everyone loved Stacey and Bradley together, they were such a perfect couple. I do miss Bradley and I'd love to see him return to the Square, but of course that will sadly never happen!

Back at the Mitchell household, it looks as if Denise has made her mind up, she walks into their living room silently, Phil is on edge waiting to hear her decision. She then states that she's in and the only way they can do this if they support each other, no more fights, everything they do will be for Raymond. They both agree to join forces and do what's right by their son. Ben's concern however is Jack, but Denise informs them that she will deal with Jack, hopefully she'll be able to make him see sense! But as this conversation is taking place, Callum is at the police station and has hacked into DI Thompson's account to get information on Ellie. Unfortunately, DI Thompson catches him in the act and warns him that what he is doing could be a sackable offence, Callum claims that the only way they can get Phil behind bars, is if he trusts him. Callum needs to make sure that Phil can trust him - DI Thompson agrees and allows Callum to continue using his account to find out what he needs to know. However, I'm still unsure whether Callum is really working with his colleague or not?! Part of me is thinking that maybe Callum will dupe his boss into thinking that he's helping them, and will be more on Phil's side. But then also things may go wrong and he may feel like he has no choice?! What do you guys think? Will Callum play dirty with the police or with Phil?!

Back at the Vic, Sharon is drowning her sorrows as she sits alone with Dennis's clothes. Ian finds her and makes a quiet entrance to make sure she's okay. He passes over to her a birthday card (I had no idea it was her birthday!) What a birthday she's had, receiving her deceased son's clothing from the scene of his death. Absolutely devastating! This is where both Sharon and Ian both come together after such a long time of misunderstanding and hatred. Sharon recalls on how Ian was there for her during the days after Dennis died, and she will forever be grateful to her friend supporting her in her time of need. She asks him whether things can go back to the way they were between them and Ian is more than happy to oblige and confirms that he wants the same thing. As lovely as this scene is, something tells me that their happiness and friendship isn't going to last long - I mean, how long can Ian hide the fact that he's to blame for her son's death?! Secrets always come out in the end!

Back at Kheerat's office, Stacey is wiping away her tears and apologising for getting emotional, but it's understandable. She lost Bradley a long time ago and now she must feel like she's lost Martin also. Kheerat can sympathise with her as he admits that he also loved someone who tragically died, revealing her identity to Stacey - Chantelle Atkins. Stacey appears surprised but also gives her condolences to Kheerat. She goes on to compliment him, saying he's a nice bloke and anyone would be lucky to have him. Its then that their eyes meet and Stacey instructs Kheerat to shut the door, as he does so she informs him that what's about to happen with just be for tonight, when tomorrow morning comes, she won't even acknowledge him in the street. With their mutual understanding, they sleep together! Okay another pairing I never thought I'd see, but maybe this could be something? Kheerat and Stacey? What do you guys think?!

After being with the Mitchell, Denise enters the Vic to find Jack and without a word, he can see that she's agreed to help Phil. Jack at first seems disappointed and let down. He begins to ask her where he fits into her plans - sorry but, this has nothing to do with Jack, if Denise wants to fight for her son, she can! She doesn't need his permission! - Anyway, Denise tries to plead to her boyfriend, she tells him that she loves him and she would never do anything to put him and his children in danger. She does however ask him whether he can stand by her as she fights for her son, as what she wants is to bring Raymond up with Jack and make him a part of their family. I think much to Jack's annoyance, he will stand by Denise. Any parent would want to fight for their children, right? Surely Jack will be able to understand that and support his girlfriend?!

The final scene of this episode, Phil is waiting patiently in the Arches. Ellie suddenly marches right in, expecting there to be some kind of confrontation between them. However, Phil holds his hands up and admits he doesn't want a war. He informs Ellie that he will give her the money for Raymond. But being the vindictive woman that she is, she informs him she's adding tax onto the payment for messing her around! Phil is absolutely staggered, but before she can leave the building he agrees to her terms. Only if she can give him a few more days to get the money together, but Ellie makes it even harder for him and informs him that she wants the money by tomorrow, otherwise he'll never get to see Raymond ever again!

My first thought to this is, what is Phil playing at? But then I also think he must have some kind of plan? No way would he give her so much money! There must be some kind of plan in place, is she duping Ellie in an attempt of tricking her to get Raymond?! But now with Denise on side, what's going to happen? Considering Ellie has also given him a deadline, I think he knows he's going to have to act fast, whatever the plan may be!!! Ooooo I'm excited to see what next week has in store! Thank you guys for reading, I hope you enjoy this post as much as I have! I'll be back on Monday! Enjoy the rest of your weekend everyone! xXx

[fashiontrendin-blog]

The Psychology of Ghosting and Why People Can’t Stop Doing It

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The Psychology of Ghosting and Why People Can’t Stop Doing It

My ghost is named Tom.

He’s persistent, this ghost. He likes haunting my dreams, catching me off-guard in the milk-sweet land of sleep, slipping into my unconscious and rattling the cage of my brain. I dream he’s back in my life, unapologetic and unreformed, still cheating and gaslighting and drinking too much. In these dreams, I am still desperate for answers, asking him over and over why he vanished, why he gave up his flesh-and-blood self and became this ghost that — even after seven years, three new cities, countless dates and the love of a good man, the best I’ve ever known — I still can’t shake.

Ghosting (the term we’ve assigned to the sudden disappearance of a romantic interest) has become synonymous with modern romance: A 2016 Plenty of Fish survey revealed 78% of users had been ghosted. When I did my own Insta-investigation, I received dozens of responses, ranging from righteous indignation to extreme chill. “Rude but inescapable” seems to be the general agreement among those I spoke to about ghosting in the age of online dating.

It’s not that the dating “slow fade” is new (one girl told me she had a friend in high school who called it “two-weeking”: After hooking up with a girl, he’d ignore her entirely for two weeks — just long enough, he said, for her to get the picture), but technology has shifted the landscape by presenting a version of the world that feels both impossibly small and intoxicatingly large. One unreturned letter in the 1800s and you could warm yourself at night with the strong odds that he perished of scurvy; now, we’re able to see our ghosts out in the world, eating brunch, Instagram Story-ing the weird bird they saw on the walk to work. Combine that with the inherent dehumanization of online dating, in which complex individuals are reduced to swipeable avatars, and what we’ve created is a flourishing breeding ground for people for whom honest, direct communication feels not only unpalatable but unnecessary.

F. Diane Barth, a New York-based psychotherapist and the author of the new book I Know How You Feel: The Joy and Heartbreak of Friendship in Women’s Lives, says that while ghosting as we understand it isn’t new, the way we have pathologized it is. “In the past, a person could stop calling or dropping by,” she says, “but now we have so many more ways of disconnecting from a person, like being unfriended or unfollowed.” Online dating also provides the comfort blanket of partial anonymity: There likely aren’t mutual friends to call you out on your callous behavior, nor shared physical spaces that force interaction. “Our communities are larger now,” says Barth, “so it’s entirely possible you might never, ever run into them again.”

The Anatomy of the Ghosted

Modern ghosting can impart a distinct and isolating feeling of shame for those who experience it. “People who have been ghosted often feel that they are the person who has done something wrong,” says Barth. “You’ve been dropped off the edge of the earth, which is very traumatic. You don’t think about how many other people this has happened to, but rather that there must be something wrong with you.”

Barth notes that shame is the brain’s natural reaction when “something or someone interrupts us in the middle of doing something we are enjoying.” Our natural instinct is to “undo the situation” so we can get back to that feeling of happiness. When we can’t — when we are, in fact, cut off completely from the source of the good feeling — we look for ways to explain away the bad feelings: She didn’t want to commit, he didn’t like my laugh. “No matter how you explain it to yourself, though,” writes Barth, “your psyche is trying to undo the sense of disruption of the good feelings. Shame is a reaction to having a circuit in your emotional system broken.”

Am I not funny? Do people not get my jokes?

It’s a very particular wound and one that is becoming inescapably familiar. Former online dater and ghostee Kelsey says her primary reaction to being ghosted was the feeling that she must be the problem. “We’re obsessed with fine-tuning and laboring over our superficial appearances (both in-person and online),” she says. “So when we’re ghosted, I think we often jump to trying to figure out what in that outer shell wasn’t well-received, and we let that disapproval soak into our inner layers that define us. We cycle through our insecurities. … Oh shit, did he not think that was funny? Am I not funny? Do people not get my jokes? Oh crap, is that what I’m giving off?”

The shame is compounded by a feeling of being duped. Alexandra was ghosted by a guy she’d been dating for a few weeks. “On our first date, we talked for six hours straight and ended it in a moonlit make-out,” she says. “He talked about cooking together after we had sex in my kitchen. We went on mini field trips — to the beach! to the cliffs! — and had after-work check-ins where he’d call me on his way home to hear about my day. And then, one day, he went from telling me he was addicted to me to only speaking if spoken to. He would weasel out of committing to a plan. He would hit me with a ‘Hey!’ on the Sunday evening of a weekend where he’d assured me he would be seeing me.”

Eventually, she says, she’d had enough. “I told him I was an adult and needed planning, that I couldn’t just keep my schedule endlessly open for him on the off chance he was free. He apologized, promised he’d do better, promised we’d see each other with more regularity. But it dwindled until our interactions were reduced to him watching my Insta Stories while I was halfway across the world on a hiking trip.”

She’s now happily cohabitating with someone else but still has trouble shaking the experience. “I think he was dishonest about how he felt about me, which made me feel like a fool. And yet he didn’t have the strength to just tell me.”

The Anatomy of the Ghoster

To state the obvious: It’s rude, plain and simple, to fail to consider another person’s feelings. We’re talking preschool lessons, the golden rule. We all learned this. So why do the ghosts ghost?

“For me, the motivation was rooted in a strong aversion to being honest about my emotions, usually for fear of hurting feelings,” says Andy, reforming ghoster. “I found that it was easier to let silence do the talking than force myself to utter, ‘I had a nice time, but I don’t feel a connection’ or whatever you’re supposed to say.”

Others, like the man I have decided to spend my life with, are less apologetic. “It was the path of least resistance,” he says. “It was often because I’ve met someone else [Author’s note: It me.], and I’m just anticipating that awkward conversation and want to avoid it. When it’s someone you haven’t been dating long or you’ve been casual with, I think that there is this emerging establishment of a new norm, which is just — that’s now the way we break up with people. I do think that it’s kinder than telling someone you’re not interested in them or that you met someone better.”

He’s not alone in this; numerous people I spoke to said that in our dating universe, ghosting is both acceptable and even considerate. “It’s almost polite if the relationship was casual enough,” says Aubrey, a former ghoster and ghostee (now married). “There is something humiliating and patronizing in a dude I’ve gone out with twice ‘breaking up’ with me.”

Ghosting seems like a cop-out for people to avoid adult conversations.

Andy, turning over his new leaf, says he gives himself a pep talk before communicating his emotions to keep himself from ghosting. “The question I ask myself when the situation arises is: What’s the absolute worst thing that can happen after telling someone you don’t want to go out again? Maybe they’d be like ‘Fuck you!! You’re a sad pathetic loser! Boy bye.’ I can live with that.”

Barth agrees that some explanation is (almost) always better than none at all. “People say they ghost because ‘they didn’t want to hurt feelings.’ And yes, people who are broken up with directly will likely experience some hurt, but the thing about ghosting is that there’s no closure.” Ghosting, she says, leaves the person who was ghosted with the humiliating impression that whatever relationship they believed existed was all in their head, that they were not worth so much as a farewell text.

Julia, happily single and dating, made it a practice to always offer an explanation after a blind date called her out at a party six months later for not responding to her texts. “I had to sneak out of the party because she wouldn’t drop it,” she says. “I have a hard rule now that I always send a text to say if I don’t want to hang again. It’s awkward, but it saves the drama.”

When I was first dating in New York, I found myself making up excuses and dodging calls to avoid telling guys I didn’t want to see them again. At the time, I was terrified of seeming rude or unlikable, and the attention I received (whether wanted or not) felt like an affirmation that I was worthy and wouldn’t be alone forever. Eventually, the stress of trying to be likable while simultaneously dodging contact became absurd. A few friends and I collaborated on a standard text we’d send when we didn’t want to see someone again (please feel free to borrow, copyright not necessary, works for all genders, just trying to do the lord’s work): “Thanks for a great night! I didn’t feel any romantic energy between us, but I wish you all the best out there.”

Some (again, I’m MARRYING this man) argue that silence is, in fact, an answer of its own. “If you text someone once, twice, and they don’t respond — I mean, that is a response. That speaks very loudly. You just don’t want to hear it.”

The Anatomy of Closure

But the problem with silence is that it leaves a deep, dark hole — one it is all too easy to fill with a foggy combination of insecurity, self-loathing and confusion.

Lauren was platonically ghosted by someone she considered one of her closest friends. “I literally did almost everything with her,” she tells me. “And then one day, she just quit calling and texting and responding to me. And then she unfollowed me on all social. … It was heartbreaking.” There were signs, in hindsight, that this woman had a callous streak; still, Lauren said, she’s unable to come up with any explanation for her behavior, and years later, it still feels like a betrayal. “I feel like I’m a pretty nice and reasonable person, so if something were wrong, I feel as though she should have discussed it with me,” she said. “Ghosting seems like a cop-out for people to avoid adult conversations.”

In the absence of closure, what we are left with is a bewildering array of questions — questions that, it’s important to remember, might never be answered even if the relationship had ended on our own terms. “Relationships are always two-sided, and we can’t know everything that is going on in the other person,” reminds Barth. “If you’ve asked for closure and they haven’t been able to provide it, you’re going to stay stuck if you keep asking. You need to give up the idea that it can be solved.”

Barth recommends talking openly to friends about your experience. “Keeping [ghosting] to yourself increases the feeling of hurt and pain and isolation,” she says. “The more you can talk about it, the more you can get feedback that will help you process it.” Building this support system can also remind you of all the connections you do have: strong, beautiful friendships, a loving family, coworkers who respect you — relationships that rely not on superficialities, but on another person seeing you fully and embracing who you really are. “You need to work really hard to remember that it isn’t about you,” says Barth. “The reason that someone [ghosted] — it’s their difficulty in having to be honest.”

After multiple ghostings through online dating, Kelsey deleted her apps. Getting over being ghosted was going to require a new outlook, she realized. “It took some time and a lot of distraction, but I was finally able to ask myself the underlying question — why were these strangers making me feel bad about myself? Why was I giving up my sense of worth as a companion entirely to this pool of bachelors? Why was my vulnerability extending to all aspects of self, instead of just limiting it to what it actually was — the viability of compatibility with this particular individual?”

When she did start dating again, she says, it felt completely different. “I wasn’t checking the app constantly. I wasn’t eager to swipe and double-tap and labor over the wittiest retort. I didn’t feel the need to calculate the perfect time between responses and, most importantly, I didn’t fill the idle time with all of the reasons I had come to believe he thought I wasn’t worth it. I went out on dates and gave myself one rule of my own — hang out with guys if it sounds fun, and if it doesn’t sound fun, then don’t.”

And when she wasn’t interested? “I would tough it up and politely decline a follow-up date,” she says. “I did that both in-person and over texts, and both are uncomfortable but important. And every guy I did that to replied with appreciation and understanding.”

My ghost and I dated for eight years, and then we didn’t. Tom stopped coming home at night, stopped answering the phone and moved all of his belongings out of our apartment while I was out of town. It wasn’t as linear as all that, of course — he’d call crying or show up unexpectedly and then disappear again over the course of a few months — but when he finally did leave for good, when I found out he had been sleeping with his best friend’s girlfriend, the closest I ever got to an explanation was, “I just can’t do this anymore.”

He’s still out there — married, balding, in the city where I left him — but we haven’t spoken since. I do not imagine he ever thinks of me. I hate that I am the one left with these questions, although maybe what I am really left with is simply my own obstinate feeling that I was owed more than what I got. I have filled the space he left behind with narratives I wrote to suit my own purposes, but the truth is, humans are just bad sometimes. We do bad things — things we said we’d never do. Sometimes, the simplest, kindest thing you can do is try to explain why.

Illustrations by Gabrielle Lamontagne.

[asknoya-blog]

Bio

Name: Noya Affiliation(s): N/A

Occupation(s): Freelance writer, adventurer

Residence(s): Flower Town (former)

Epithet: N/A

Age: 24

Birthday: February 5th

Height: 168 cm (5 and ½ ft.)

Bounty: N/A

Devil Fruit Powers: N/A

Dream: To write the greatest adventure story

Personality

At first glance, it is easy to see that she is the polite, nice girl arch type. And for the most part, does fall into this category. Taught all her life to be polite and kind to others (the rather famous do onto others as you would do onto yourself), she is indeed quite polite. She’s a kind young woman and often likes to help in any way she can, provided she can put her foot forward and make the offer, as she’s extremely shy and suffers from a bit of social anxiety. She’s also quite honest when she speaks, as the saying goes, if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all, and she habitually practices this. However, usually, she just has rather nice/polite things to say to people. But if negative topics are brought up, such as world government corruption, etc. then, well, she’s honest and quite frank. Noya is very practical in her thinking and logic, so she doesn’t really beat around the bush to try to say anything cryptically (she’s not very good at that sort of thing anyway).

However, the longer she is known, the more her deeper faults are revealed. The more comfortable she becomes around someone, be they a friend or a love interest, things begin to come through that honestly didn’t seem possible in the way she is at first meeting. Noya has extreme trust issues. She can only trust people to a certain extent, and when that point is met, she begins to distance herself due to anxiety caused by her inability to trust anyone deeply (these issues are far more prevalent in romantic relationships). And oddly enough, despite her trust issues, she can be quite gullible, as she’s not particularly good at picking up undertones, which has caused her trouble repeatedly when dealing with people, especially in her travels. And every time she realizes she’s been duped or was too polite she becomes quite angry with herself, and also embarrassed. She’s a bit spacey, a cliché for most creative people, as she is a creative person. Noya frequently checks out of the real world and gets caught up in thinking about her writing and what she wants to do/experience, and just ends up spacing out.

Due to her trust issues Noya is terrible at conveying herself when she’s experiencing anything negative, and unfortunately, she still drags around a cloud of negativity with her even though she’s been trying to ditch it behind for years, but it clings quite stubbornly onto her. The more upset/distraught she is, the more she just shuts up and puts up, and the more likely she’ll just try to find somewhere to hide without ever talking or trying to deal with the problem, which is a problem. She is haunted by the events of her childhood and both hates and suffers in silence when she looks back on it, even though she wishes she wouldn’t, but it comes unbidden to her mind most every day.

However, she is trying to change. Noya is tired of always hiding in the shadows and never leaving home, of being afraid of others when her more natural personality is outgoing and fun loving. She wants to be as she had once been before her childhood was crushed, and she’s pushing herself forward to do it. She’s stopped wearing dark baggy clothes, she tries to dress cute and smile at everyone, she tries to make eye contact (she fails more often than not) and be forward. She struggles a lot with these things, though at least she’s become comfortable in the cute, more revealing clothes she wears (no longer the pants and baggy sweaters she always wore), and she’s come to truly enjoy dressing up cute. Though she often has moments of regret when shady guys start hitting on her. But, in a way, this is good too! She has somewhat learned how to turn away most creepy men, and if not, tolerate them until she’s in a position where they can’t bother her anymore.

Her core personality is fun loving, with a bit of a sarcastic, perhaps even dark humor. She loves doing things outside (exploring her world) or relaxing inside with a good book. She loves to drink with friends and have a good time, but she also loves to just chill at home and do something really relaxing, like writing… always writing. She’s often positive and tries her best, even if at times her more pessimistic side may reveal itself.

History (warning: Noya’s childhood has some sensitive material-though nothing is written descriptively)

Noya was born in Flower Town in West Blue. Her family was poor, but never in dire need. Her clothes were always from thrift shops and her toys of an inferior make, but never was she ever be in need of anything. Her father worked hard all day while her mother stayed home, unfortunately, even though her mother stayed home, Noya was neglected horribly. Her mother was far more interested in her own activities than watching her daughter. Due to this Noya was almost never supervised and often would run around with wild abandon, she also learned to take care of herself from a young age. However, even as a young girl, Noya felt her mother’s neglect strongly and even confronted her, demanding her attention on many occasions. But instead of truly getting the love and care she wanted, the two would fight and scream at one another, usually only ending when Noya would threaten to run away and sometimes, she did run... to the far side of town… at the age of 3 and many more times throughout her childhood. Her relationship with her mother was incredibly rocky because of this while growing up, and as an adult, even though things have been patched up between the two (when her mother realized she was wrong-though too late), she and her mother aren’t that close. She loves her mom, but the connection just isn’t there from a lack of contact when she was young. However, from the get go her relationship with her father was strong and continues to be so as she frequently writes him letters as she travels.

What truly hurt Noya more than anything and caused her more deep issues, which was more easily allowed to happen due to her mother’s neglect is the sexual abuse she suffered. Unfortunately, she never told anyone but instead recoiled and tried to hide from everyone. She fell into depression in her tweens and became highly suicidal until she finally sought help and was given therapy. The therapy helped her quite a lot, and over the years she’s been changing, sometimes it feels rapid, others it seems slow. But she’s changing, she’s finally becoming more of who she once was before her innocence was ripped from her and her view of the world distorted. However, due to the events of her childhood, she’s been damaged, and her ability to trust is severely challenged, but she’s trying to do better. It would be a lot easier if creepy guys would not press her so much for dates.

Noya is still quite petrified of rape, as it is her number one fear, even more so than death, as she would rather die than go through it again. And she’s quite sensitive to the subject and tends to reject shows of affection even though personally she actually likes them, but irrational fear gets in the way, which is something she wants to fix.

Noya left home when she turned 24 and has been traveling for six months. It’s been a challenge, but she’s getting used to it. She was already used to taking care of herself, but alone out in the world was the biggest challenge she ever faced. However, she’s loving it and finds herself enjoying the world and all its wonders.

Noya wants to write her book, make lots of friends, have great adventures around the world, perhaps find love, and live the life she’s always dreamed. Deep down there is only sunshine in her heart, and she wants to make the cloudy days and overcast mornings vanish forever.

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A Holiday Spirit Starter Pack for the Grinches in Your Life

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A Holiday Spirit Starter Pack for the Grinches in Your Life

In Turkey, for the non-religious, New Year’s Eve is a really big deal: people put up trees, buy gifts, decorate their homes…basically everything that smells like Christmas and looks like Christmas, but, you know, is all in celebration of January 1st. This is why, in America, my family sometimes felt like the sole benefactor of Target’s 70% markdowns on ornaments come December 26th.

After my parents immigrated from Istanbul in the early ‘90s, they continued to cherish the holiday season with an unbridled gusto they passed on to me. And as someone who now voluntarily resides in New England as an adult, I consider the holiday season my last hurrah before everything goes to shit. From January onward, the weather transitions from slushy to morose to downright incomprehensible. And so I’ve continued my mom and dad’s tradition of, shall we say, holiday enthusiasm, for all things Christmas, despite not being Christian, because really, what else do I have to look forward to before gluing myself to a seasonal happy lamp for the next five months?

All this is to say that I don’t “get” people who don’t “get” the holidays. I’ve heard this from everyone: friends, coworkers, my significant other. Unless the holidays genuinely make you feel sad, which I totally respect, I only see the upside of falling head-first into festive spirit. So if you, too, have loved ones with enthusiasm-related barriers to doing so, allow me to help you help them with the below list of foolproof suggestions, which I’ve compiled with the express purpose to de-Scrooge the crankiest among us.

If I could put stability or a ho-hum news cycle in my shopping cart this holiday season, I’d have already checked out by now. Alas, that’s where ABC Family, Disney, and a host of other holiday moviemakers come in to fill the void. Their copy-and-paste plotlines are beyond comforting given our current political climate, and honestly, how refreshing is it to know that the most shocking thing about the leading male character is going to be that he’s secretly Santa Claus (and not a literal predator)?

Starter pack, in order of Rotten Tomato scores: Jack Frost, 20%: The only holiday film perfectly tailored for fans of American Horror Story and Donnie Darko. Errant dad Michael Keaton dies and reincarnates (read: haunts) his family as a snowman. Unaccompanied Minors, 30%: A successful dupe for Home Alone. Just substitute home for an airport, and burglars for the TSA (a sentiment anyone who’s handed over shampoo at a security checkpoint can empathize with). 12 Dates of Christmas, 51%: Imagine experiencing your worst blind date twelve times, with Jordin Sparks singing in the background the whole time. The Mistle-tones, 57%: Like Glee meets Step Up, but with a lot of plaid. The Santa Clause, 75%: Sure to be a hit with anyone who works in finance, law or another field that actually requires you to read the Terms & Agreements at the end of documents.

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Sugar is considered better for you than salad this time of year! It’s shocking to me that most people haven’t heard of this unwritten rule, which is why it’s so fun to tell them. Surprise! Here, sprinkle some more graham crackers atop your eggnog ice cream. Tuck into that sheet of peppermint bark––once the clock strikes 12 on January 1st, your body registers it as kale.

Starter Pack: Chocolate Caramel Crack(ers) from Smitten Kitchen: The ideal baked good for you and your favorite Scrooge to make together. Cookie Salad from Molly Yeh: Bless Molly Yeh and her interpretation of salad. French Toast Casserole with Salted Frosted Flakes from Chrissy Teigen: For all those times when French toast isn’t indulgent enough. Reversed Impossible Chocolate Flan from Melissa Clark: Would it be the holidays if you didn’t have the time to flip and reverse an already very complicated desert? Christmas Tree Cupcakes from Martha Stewart: If you’re the person who eats the frosting and discards the actual cupcake, this one’s for you.

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Win them over with comfort. No one can actually be grouchy about the umpteenth holiday party where they have to make small talk about how it’s “so cold this year” and “wow, shitty media men, who knew, right?” if they’re draped in velvet. It’s scientifically impossible. If you’re still having trouble, might I suggest adding glitter?

Starter Pack: These boots from Madewell and Strategia. These have zippers, which is why they’re sensible. This dress from Rhode Resort. Pair it with tights, and you’ll be set to dominate in some drunken calisthenics at your next holiday event. This blazer from J.Crew. Just crying out for an embroidered scarf tied around your neck. These bow pumps from Tory Burch. Nothing says it’s the holidays like gratuitous bows. MR by Man Repeller velvet sandals!!! And a velvet from Self-Portrait (on sale!). For those who refuse to let the off-the-shoulder trend die.

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I empathize with the malcontents who say they’ve heard Christmas classics one too many times in malls across America, but that’s no reason to shun to the world of alternative holiday music that exists. “Jingle Bells” and “We Wish You a Merry Christmas”, these are not.

Starterpack: Sufjan Stevens Christmas: If this was a particularly trying cuffing season, Sufjan Stevens’ holiday music is your soundtrack for extensive crying jags. Punk Rock Christmas: Just when your parents were counting their blessings for not having to brave Hot Topic for your Christmas presents anymore! A Very She & Him Christmas: Probably not being played in Macy’s, but definitely being played in an Anthropologie. Holidays Rule: A compilation album that contains both The Shins and Andrew Bird, so it’s actually a tribute to your douchey high school ex.

The absolute best part of the holidays is how socially acceptable it is to drink at nearly any time, in any format. Consider the hot toddy: all the comforts of a cup of tea, spiked to give you the confidence that you can make it through the next time someone makes an off-color political quip over dinner. The holidays are, in a way, like freshman year of college all over again: most everyone is giddy over something or another, and there’s copious amounts of booze (and the better quality stuff is reserved for the older folks).

Starter Pack: Santa’s Sleigh: Somewhere between a milkshake and a mojito Spiked Apple Cider: Decidedly better than whatever version of this you drank at fraternity holiday parties. Fairytale of New York: Isn’t the name just enough? Lady Irish: Paint your nails green, add some glitter, and pose with a glass of this drink. Coquito: Guaranteed to get your cousin who won’t stop talking about how amazing it is to be a vegan really, really wasted.

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Collage by Kelsey Lim.

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