#is craaazy good

[biblically-accurate-dca]

sb humanizations + various vannys :3

[idyllcy]

illicit affairs

word count: 2,018

warnings: nsfw, smut, messy sex, mild dubcon. switch!YeXuan

summary: I mean, it's not like he's doing anything wrong if you're the one doing the work, right? Well, even then. You started it.

"I told you, I can't—" Cael leans back as you straddle him, blinking at him owlishly.

"Then don't." You hum, loosening his robe. "Just sit still."

He reaches to pull you off of him, and you tilt your head.

"W-where is this coming from?" He whimpers as you press your hand to his abdomen, sliding down. "Y-you weren't this upfront before."

You lean in instead, lips brushing his ear as he shifts uncomfortably, chuckling breathily. "Yeah?"

He cranes his neck as your lips brush his ears, and the blush on his skin is brutally unforgiving as you giggle. You shift your hips over his crotch as his breath hitches, watching as his breath catches in his throat and he holds back a groan. You do it again, and this time, he manages to hiss out a weak "stop."

"But you were really eager when you were jerking off to me the other day." You mumble, pressing your lips to his, forcing your tongue into his mouth as you lick the roof of his mouth with a satisfied hum. He whimpers as your chest presses to his, and his fingers cling onto the sofa fabric underneath him to try to get him to stop touching you like his mind wants him to.

You pull away from him, strand of saliva connecting your lips to his.

"S-still." He manages, head spinning from your lips as he watches the strand break. God, he wants more. "It's wrong."

"It's not wrong if you aren't doing anything." You hum, pulling your shirt over your head. "You don't know what this feeling is, right? It's a shame you all don't emphasize on this feeling. Besides, with how many worlds I've been in, this should be far from wrong now."

You pull his robe off of him as you roll your hips again, and he moans this time.

"Aww." You coo, pressing a gentle kiss to his cheek. "Just sit still and look pretty, alright?"

You spit on your hand as you pump him, blinking at him through your lashes as you stare at him, collecting his precum on your thumb as you slide it up and down, drinking in the way his breath hitches and he whimpers, biting down on his lip to try and stop the sound from coming out. You ignore him as you keep going, forcing your chest to his as he tries to look anywhere but your cleavage, and you click your tongue in disdain.

"Cael, baby." You feign pity. "Do you feel bad for staring when I'm the one inviting you to?"

He turns impossibly more red, and you laugh, pressing a kiss to his jaw as his fingers clench uncomfortably.

"We really shouldn't—"

"It's fine." You hum, speeding up with your hand, lips curled into a cheeky smile. "Come on. You can cum. You know you want to."

Cael's hips stutter as he spills into your hand, eyes widening as he moans lewdly— and you kiss him, drinking up his voice as he pulses in your hand, skin flushed pink and body tense.

You let go once he finishes, licking the fluid from your hand, making a show of it as you stick your tongue out, and you watch as Cael's eyes focus in on your fingers, and you watch as he swallows— his adam's apple bobbing as he does, and you moan at the taste. God.

You stare down at Cael's dick, eyes lighting up as you find that he's still hard.

"Oh? I thought you said you shouldn't do this?"

"I-I really." He gasps as you slide down to put him in your mouth, giving him a lick from the base to the tip. "sh-shouldn't"

His voice cuts off as you take him all the way, lips wrapped around his cock as his tip nudges the back of your throat, and your throat tightens around him as he throws his head back, hair messy underneath him as his mouth hangs open.

"A-ah." His eyes waver as your lashes flutter, and he moves his hand to grab the cushion instead of the seat, whimpering. "I-it's so."

You moan around his cock, feeling him swell in your mouth as your nails dig into his thigh, tears forming in the corner of your eyes as you try and breathe through your nose. Cael pants as you move slowly, caught off guard when he cums almost immediately down your throat, apologizing as you force yourself to keep him there, the salt from his cum hitting the back of your throat. You swallow, him still in your mouth, and you pull off of him, saliva connected to his cock, opening your mouth to show him that you swallowed everything.

He tries looking away.

"Nuh-uh, Cael. Come on, baby." You force him to look at you as he swallows, skin feverish as you press your lams to his waist, holding him down. He could easily overpower you if he wanted to— yet he doesn't. He doesn't know what force keeps him in place, but it makes him dizzy and weird. He didn't know he was capable of feeling such intense emotion for someone. He wanted to deny that he liked you this much for such a long time, and he swore he wouldn't touch you, yet here he is— his cum in your mouth, your bare skin pressed to his as you kick out of your skirt and panties, and Cael has the urge to throw his decorum out and just fuck you how he's always imagined having you since you're already like this, but god he really shouldn't.

"Cael," You press your cunt to his cock, sliding up and down but not putting it in, and Cael feels his self-restraint slipping. "I know you want to. I started it, so it's fine, right? Come on, you know you want to. Come on, don't you want to see me dripping with your cum? Aren't you tired of seeing me end up with tho—"

The last of Cael's self-control snaps as he flips you over, him over you as you grin at him, shaking your hips to show him how wet you are. He sighs, pulling the hair tie from your wrist to his, pushing his hair back to tie it after pulls you in by the hips and using your slick to lube himself, brows furrowed as your eyes sharpen in excitement, whining for him to put it in already.

"You wanted this, didn't you?" He pants, pressing a thumb to your clit as he slides a finger in, curling it inside you as you gasp excitedly. "You wanted to see me snap and give it to you? After so long?"

You nod your head feverishly as he slides a second finger in with ease, curling them against your sweet spot, making you see stars. You drip around him messily— pussy relishing the touch of something. You tighten around him as he slides in further, adding a third finger as you gasp at the stretch, moaning deliciously as he starts moving the fingers, and you whimper sweetly as you feel your orgasm approaching, babbling about how you were cumming, and Cael hums, watching as you squirt all over him, his fingers fucking you through your orgasm as you cry about how you were starting to get sensitive.

He pulls out a little later, staring at the way his wrist got drenched, and he sticks the fingers into his mouth, pulling you closer by the hips, lining himself up with you.

"You sure?" He whispers.

"Just put it in already!" you wail.

He listens, sliding into you all the way, and your lips part as he stretches you, and your head buzzes dizzily as you finally get what you want. You look up to see him staring at you, and you look down at the bulge in your pelvis; Cael presses on it as your breath hitches, and his eyes glimmer mischievously as he presses again, causing you to jolt.

"Cael." You whimper. "Please start moving."

"Patience, sweetheart." He hums, pulling your hips up as he reaches for a pillow to put under your waist, supporting your back as he finally grabs you by the hips and fucks you.

He drags you slowly on his cock at first, watching you as your expression changes as he moves you, taking note of where you catch yourself before you can whimper and where your lips part just a little more than before.

Then, when he gets it, he moves quicker, watching as you throw your head back and moan wantonly, tears in the corner of your eyes as he moves a hand to thumb at your clit, making your head spin deliriously as he picks up the pace, practically ramming into you as you babble about how good it feels, eyes wide as your nails dig into his forearm, holding on for support as you feel an orgasm approaching, gushing around Cael as he fucks you through it, only slowing down slightly before quickening again when your orgasm finishes, and you cry about how you were still sensitive, but it falls on deaf ears, the male chasing his own high after giving you yours.

The hand of his moves from your clit to your chest, pinching your nipple and rolling the bud between his fingers, staining it with your juices as you whimper, and he leans in to kiss you as you squirm beneath him, his hand still on your waist, holding you in place as you let his tongue explode your mouth, a mess of saliva around the two of you’s mouths as you whimper, feeling another orgasm snaking down your spine and around his cock as the hand on your tit moves down to thumb at your clit again, just enough stimulus to send you over the edge with a moan swallowed by Cael.

You clench around his cock as you feel him swell inside of you, and your walls flutter when you cum again, tears sliding down the corner of your eyes as you try to sit up to stop him, but he holds you down with his body. You fall back into the sofa as you feel him pulse inside of you, fingers threading through his hair to pull on it as he speeds up. Wrapping your legs around his back as to trap him, he spills into your pussy with a lewd groan as you moan from being pumped full. His hold on you weakens as your lips meet his again, lashes fluttering as you feel his thumb circle your clit lazily as he kisses you.

"Mmm..." You moan, arching your back as pulls you up, hands on his chest as he holds your waist. He leans back for air and slips out of you as he reaches to the coffee table to grab a tissue to wipe you down. "You're so hot..." You mumble.

He pries your legs open as you use your fingers to spread your pussy, showing him as his cum trickles out— pearly white sliding down your cunt to land on the couch in a puddle, and Cael feels the blood rush to his head again, making him feel dizzy as he wipes you, hand holding your wrists in place as he cleans you.

"One more." You mumble. "Please?"

"No." He mumbles. "You've had your fill."

"You won't even need to do anything." You bat your lashes at him innocently, pretty pout on your lips. "I'll ride you."

"No." He rejects you, letting go of your wrists as he reaches for another tissue, and you pounce, pushing him back onto the sofa as you hold him down by the hips.

"Your dick says otherwise." You lick your lips, positioning above him and bottoming him out in you almost instantly, a sinful sigh slipping past your lips as he fills you again. He slides in easily with a squelch, and you smile at him. "Please?"

He looks to the side, skin flushed again, and he agrees with a whimper.

He could never say no to you anyway.

[lord-squiggletits]

Pharma's place in a Functionist society (headcanon)

So I've talked in some previous posts about all the reasons that Pharma isn't a functionist because canon never showed him espousing functionist ideals + he's actually in a place to be a victim of functionism. And I've been working on a Pharma-centric oneshot that made me put into words the best metaphor I can think of for Pharma's relationship with Functionism:

He doesn't support Functionism, but is simultaneously a beneficiary of it and also marginalized by it, because his position of being forged both a doctor and a jet basically turns him into a "token minority" of sorts.

I know that sounds kind of silly or maybe like a clumsy political allegory, but hear me out. There are a couple facts about Pharma and the circumstances of his forging that put him at the crossroads between privilege and marginalization within Functionism:

Tyrest says that Pharma was "famous for being forged." Not famous for being a forged medic-- otherwise surely Ratchet would be just as noteworthy-- but famous for being FORGED. But also, note that this is an opinion that SOCIETY had about Pharma, not something that Pharma espouses about himself. (For the sake of an example, Pharma isn't Starscream, who has an explicit, deep-seated need for others' love and approval. Pharma himself doesn't express any opinions on his own popularity or convey that fame/adoration is something he wants.)

Functionism on Cybertron held that if someone was born with a certain alt-mode, they can/should only have certain jobs. For people born with flight alt-modes, those people were almost always regulated to military or transportation/courier jobs

SIMULTANEOUSLY, Pharma was forged with medic hands, which under a Functionist society were viewed as the peak of medical care and all the best doctors were forged or at least had a "special something" that non-forged hands lacked (according to Ratchet).

So taken in combination, this means that from the moment of Pharma's birth, he straddled a line of Functionism between two different "predestined" paths for him, where he was simultaneously forged to be a doctor and also forged to fly, fitting into BOTH of these categories despite norms of Functionism which say you're one or the other. And I speculate that the reason Pharma is "famous for being forged" is precisely because of those lines he straddles: his very existence is a contradiction, but he was also FORGED that way. The same creed that dictated the two different functions of "hands" and "alt-mode" also says that Pharma should be what he was born to be. What he was born to be was a forged medic jet.

In my opinion, I think that being "famous for being forged" is sort of like a token-minority situation for Pharma, where perhaps Pharma was seen as a curiosity or even something exotic, not just as a person. Maybe because he was a jet and people assumed jets were only soldiers/transportation, a lot of his achievements were put in the light of "Oh, he's a really amazing doctor, for a jet" or "It's crazy that he's a doctor AND a jet at the same time". The attention Pharma received for the unique circumstances of his birth WAS positive, but it would've likely been framed in a bit of a condescending way, as if Pharma is noteworthy and famous not for being a good doctor, but for being a good doctor despite being born a jet.

So I would say that as far as Pharma's personal experience with Functionism, he simultaneously experienced privilege and marginalization. He enjoyed the privileges of being a medic while avoiding the restrictions of being a flight frame. However, a lot of the idolization and attention he received would have also come from a place of tokenizing Pharma: he's "famous for being forged," because in this society he's defying expectations merely for existing as himself. That is to say, Pharma in a Functionist society wasn't treated as remarkable because of who he is as a person and how hard he worked to be a good doctor; he was treated as remarkable for the circumstances of his forging, something he had no control over and can't change, and apparently Pharma being a forged medic jet is such a noteworthy origin that he's "famous" for it.

The above paragraph is purely headcanon, of course, but I like to imagine that part of Pharma's reason for having a big ego isn't out of simple vanity or insecurity, but because of a sort of "gifted student" syndrome, in a sense. From the moment he was forged he was treated as a rarity and an incredible phenomenon, and he would have had to work incredibly hard to be seen as "an incredible doctor" in his own right rather than just "that forged medic jet." Maybe, as a jet, he also had something to prove; he had to show to a Functionist society that being a jet doesn't make him an inferior doctor and that his alt-mode has nothing to do with his skills at his profession.

That is to say, I don't think Pharma would have been openly anti-Functionist, or had many opinions about it at all. I actually lean towards the interpretation that Pharma basically saw himself as getting lucky with the way he was forged and being content with the fact that he'd managed to carve out a reputation for himself as being incredibly skilled. However, Pharma not getting involved politically in Functionism doesn't change the fact that he WOULD have had a very complicated relationship with Functionism, in that alt-mode discrimination would have had an effect on him even though he was in the scientific/medical class and supposedly privileged.

[conkreetmonkey]

Bug was sent to your door for trick or treating

For the second day in a row, a figure was standing before the old submarine-style bulkhead, and once again it announced itself with a knock, what would have been a loud, hollow clang muffled by a thick pair of dark brown gloves, resulting in a dull metallic clunk.

"Trick or treat!" a rough yet polite voice called out in an enthusiastic yet contained half-shout, as if trying to make up for the weak knock but not wanting to full-on yell.

This visitor, unlike the last person to knock on that door, was not looking around confused, nor was it unsure of how it got there. It had come to the old door willingly, its trick or treating intentional rather than being commited in some sort of hazy fugue state. Indeed, this person was much unlike the last, not only in behaviour but in appearance as well, not looking at all out of place in the dimly-lit concrete hallway clad in crumbling institutional tiles, foul green slime accumulating under leaking iron pipes that snaked up and down the walls like metal ivy.

In other words, the creature standing there looked like a freaky-ass mad scientist.

It stood with its heavy-gloved hands behind its back, legs straight and chest forward with a polite grin that would have been charming if its teeth didn't look like it routinely gargled with pesto. Its broad, stout frame was clad in some sort of boxy lab jacket which hung down to its knees, made from a thick material coloured in a dull, unpleasant off-yellow reminiscent of creamed corn or rotten old wallpaper glue. Splatters of snot green something-or-other clung to its scuffed surface, long since having dried into rubbery, crusted-on stains. The jackets black buttons were fastened up to the top, a large circular collar snugly obscuring the wearers entire neck. Its sleeves were tucked into the gloves, and baggy canvas pants of army green were tucked into a heavy pair of brown leather work boots. No skin was showing below the chin, and the thick, loose-fitting nature of the entire outfit made it hard to discern much about the body underneath, aside from it being of a short and stocky sort. Its stature communicated confidence, intelligence and poise.

The thing inhabiting the outfit, of course, was a complete fucking freak.

Olive green skin clashed against ginger hair, sitting dry and frizzy against the back of the neck in a shoulder-length side part and growing on the face in thick yet uneven patches. Acne pocked the orcish humanoid's face, red pimples clashing against the earthy green and copper. The eyes were obscured behind opaque black welding goggles that rested atop a large nose and were fastened with a grey strap. With a broad rounded jaw, short forehead and prominent canines, the being simultaneously looked like a mutant created in a lab and like he created mutants in a lab, and would have looked just as natural being the monster strapped to a metal platform as it would being the mad doctor who flipped the switch, bringing the monster to life.

This goblin-like creature, reeking of formaldehyde and burning rubber, stood patiently just outside the metal door, its eyes lighting up with excitement as the valve in the center began to turn. With a series of mechanical squeaks and the creak of metal hinges, the door slowly slid open, revealing a familiar freak with wild pink hair and skin the colour of a spent fuel pool. Fitting, since he was munching on a stick of enriched uranium like it was a cucumber, glowing crumbs of neon yellow clinging to his lips as his face lit up with the joy of seeing a friend.

"Eh, Bugbug! Happy Halloween!" the blue thing said, wiping dangerously radioactive flecks of pure cancer onto his shirt with his hands, it lifting to reveal a definitionless belly with a slight nuclear glow shining through it from the inside, murky shadows of anomalous organs briefly visible before a curtain of thick green fabric obscured it once more. "It's not often you come to my door looking for a tasty treat!" he joked with a slight chuckle, the entire inside of his mouth stained flourescent highlighter yellow. Bug was less than amused, but it held its tongue. It and he both knew that it just couldn't stay mad at the little scamp, no matter how often he broke into its lab to slurp radioactive waste from sealed nuclear barrels, chug unattended beakers of biohazardous ooze, or munch on Bug's secret stash of yellowcake briquettes. The guy had a good heart, it knew, and as often as Bug grabbed him by his shirt collar to scream obscenities in his face and threw test tubes at him, it knew he was just a silly little guy, a lovable goober particularly prone to the toxic munchies, and its furious reactions were all in good fun, a slapstick game of cat and mouse that they both enjoyed.

Or at least that's what the blue thing believed. It was possible that Bug felt different, but he wouldn't know. He'd just assumed Bug hadn't really meant any of it, and fully anticipated his little snack seshies.

Pinching its nose, Bug took a deep breath and regained its happy expression. It was trick or treating, and it was out here to have fun; no use thinking about all the locks it still had to replace. "Happy Halloween, Conky!" it said, its cheery grin truly genuine. "Ah, hold on, I've got just the thing for you!" Conky said, holding up one finger as he reached behind the door, set his fuel rod down on something, and grabbed something else, plopping it down in Bug's hand with an excited grin.

It was a single breakfast sausage, cooked but cold, with little bits of dirt stuck to it.

"Happy Halloween!" Conky said, before pulling his door shut and turning the valve from the inside, leaving Bug alone in the gloomy little concrete box that Conky called his front doorstep.

After staring at its small greasy "prize" for a few moments, Bug started back up the stairs.

[lewiseb]

give me leclerc piastri fights every race of the season actually this is so exciting

[dinoboirex1]

TRASH ANIMALS

me and the gang are gonna be cooking something goood today 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

[vox-fantasma]

adult taissa is throwing finger guns at van, joking around with her, reminiscing about their pranks, trying so so so hard to go back to a simpler time with this person who used to be that for her. who used to be goofy and silly and light so that tai could be as well. and it’s so sad because we get a glimpse of what they were probably like after the rescue when they were still together, scandalizing jackie’s mom at shauna’s wedding, but we also see where the cracks must’ve started. van can’t afford to be that all the time. and neither can tai, and the desperation in her voice as she tries to pretend is just very ouch

[itoshi-s]

stepdaddy! oliver would go crazyyyyyy zari 😳 i know im in ur mail all the time but blue lock boys are on my mind around the clock!!! :,) and omg im really starting to love rin now, ur agenda is def working! poor babe feels lonely and betrayed for what meanie head sae did to him :(( mwah take care of urself zari ♡♡♡

OOOOOOOH JAE,, PLEASE THIS FITS HIM SO WELL Q_Q he's your mum's much younger lover and YOU KNOW he's bad news - from the way you hear her crying in her room a bit more often now, then see her all over him the following day as if nothing ever happened. how he's so charming and sweet to every other woman - not just her. you hate his guts, even though your mom never really confines in you and doesn't dare badmouth him in any way. but you just have this gut feeling that he's not to be trusted - no matter how much he tries to make u warm up 2 him.

and your instincts are proven right when he has you spread on his bed some time later, and makes you feel better than any other guy your age ever could. but it's far too late now, and you should've been more cautious before it happened - cause now that he's had you, there's no way in hell he's giving u up :(

[ervona]

Shutter Island wasn't that good ngl... how many dead wife movies can we take. it had somewhat interesting twists to watch but overall idk if I like the result. mister Scorsese stick to Goncharov 2

[hraeesvelgr]

me and my partner decided to rate some of the op character's singing based on the island song album and nippon judan songs .. this is the result of a 5 hour call.

some of these layer names are questionable at best but they summed up our thoughts ❤️

[st4rstudent]

carefully setting these ✨Creatures✨ down at your doorstep, and then immediately scattering awayshxhs (HAPPY BIRTHDAY AGAIN-!!! MY APOLOGIES IF THIS AIN'T TOO GOOD, THIS IS MY FIRST TIME DRAWING EM SHCHSXBS MAC AND BRIAN BE UPON YE 🐀🐀🐀)

OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHGUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHMUUJYSOTMACH😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

[wildlyfreemoon]

Rewatching the last of us and lordy lord can Bella Ramsey and pedro pascal act

[suddenrundown]

hopped on to watch dan and phil's pcrf stream and heard dan say "i've done everything in saltburn twice."

[leojurand]

so obsessed with this... gelis being not normal at all about nicholas and also kinda right in most of the things she says, nicholas goading her... gelis snapping like that because he didn't pay attention to her for 2 seconds

[shootingthe-stars]

i’m ngl after chapter 30 to end off second year, 31 through like 43 is just banger after banger i’m reading through it like DAMN?? third year is so good…i literally am so impatient i want everyone to read everything Now