#is admitting you are too
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damianbugs · 8 months ago
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comics are in and of itself, an unreliable narrator.
i say this because i started my comic journey with jason todd. i read all his robin appearances, pre and post crisis, then read hush and under the red hood, and all i could think about was what the fuck. what the fuck batman. how did you become this. what happened between 1988 and 2006. how did the the man who's life revolved around caring for this child, teaching this child, learning from this child, protecting this child, losing this child — become hurting him.
it was so baffling to me i found myself slipping into the batman shaped void that many never return from (lol). and so now, i have read over 1500 batman comics, over 300 different writers, spanning over 80 years of publication. i finally get to what happened between 1988 and 2006, and how batman as a character has become as unrecognisable as he has remained familiar. i see the events of alpod, knightfall, cataclysm, no man's land, the 200 individual batman issues and 200 individual detective comics issues alone that had passed, not taking into account the the other long runs, mini runs, short stories or collaborative comics that were released in those 18 years. the people he had met, lost, been betrayed by, abandoned in those stories.
it has only been about 5 years since jason todd died for bruce wayne. 5 years that have felt like two decades.
it has only been around 4 years for jason since he climbed his way out of his grave. 4 years that felt like less than three.
so when reading as jason, i felt betrayed. how could batman do this? how can't he see? he knows how i would have mourned him, he knows how fiercely i love him, how all i want is for him to prove he ever loved me the same way. how can he not change after all these years? how is he not aware that he is not the change gotham needs? (how does he not see that he is what i need — needed.) how will he save gotham? he can't. he can't save gotham. he can't save me. but i can. i can fix it.
then i read as bruce and i am betrayed. who is this? why does he doubt how much i loved him? what changed? why did he change? (am i the one who changed? no, surely not.) after everything, the people i have hurt, the people i have lost, the people i have sacrificed for gotham, how can he doubt? he would have never asked me to do this before, he understood, i'm sure he did, before. i won't choose. i can't choose. where is my son. where am i. i can't save gotham. i can't save you. but i can fix it. i can fix you.
they're both wrong.
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inkskinned · 1 year ago
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because sometimes there are invisible tests and invisible rules and you're just supposed to ... know the rule. someone you thought of as a friend asks you for book recommendations, so you give her a list of like 30 books, each with a brief blurb and why you like it. later, you find out she screenshotted the list and send it out to a group chat with the note: what an absolute freak can you believe this. you saw the responses: emojis where people are rolling over laughing. too much and obsessive and actually kind of creepy in the comments. you thought you'd been doing the right thing. she'd asked, right? an invisible rule: this is what happens when you get too excited.
you aren't supposed to laugh at your own jokes, so you don't, but then you're too serious. you're not supposed to be too loud, but then people say you're too quiet. you aren't supposed to get passionate about things, but then you're shy, boring. you aren't supposed to talk too much, but then people are mad when you're not good at replying.
you fold yourself into a prettier paper crane. since you never know what is "selfish" and what is "charity," you give yourself over, fully. you'd rather be empty and over-generous - you'd rather eat your own boundaries than have even one person believe that you're mean. since you don't know what the thing is that will make them hate you, you simply scrub yourself clean of any form of roughness. if you are perfect and smiling and funny, they can love you. if you are always there for them and never admit what's happening and never mention your past and never make them uncomfortable - you can make up for it. you can earn it.
don't fuck up. they're all testing you, always. they're tolerating you. whatever secret club happened, over a summer somewhere - during some activity you didn't get to attend - everyone else just... figured it out. like they got some kind of award or examination that allowed them to know how-to-be-normal. how to fit. and for the rest of your life, you've been playing catch-up. you've been trying to prove that - haha! you get it! that the joke they're telling, the people they are, the manual they got- yeah, you've totally read it.
if you can just divide yourself in two - the lovable one, and the one that is you - you can do this. you can walk the line. they can laugh and accept you. if you are always-balanced, never burdensome, a delight to have in class, champagne and glittering and never gawky or florescent or god-forbid cringe: you can get away with it.
you stare at your therapist, whom you can make jokes with, and who laughs at your jokes, because you are so fucking good at people-pleasing. you smile at her, and she asks you how you're doing, and you automatically say i'm good, thanks, how are you? while the answer swims somewhere in your little lizard brain:
how long have you been doing this now? mastering the art of your body and mind like you're piloting a puppet. has it worked? what do you mean that all you feel is... just exhausted. pick yourself up, the tightrope has no net. after all, you're cheating, somehow, but nobody seems to know you actually flunked the test. it's working!
aren't you happy yet?
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utilitycaster · 1 year ago
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"why should I get invested in shows if they'll just get canceled" I was deeply invested in Heroes (2006) and it was not canceled, it just got really terrible. I also got really invested in the sandwich I had a few weeks ago despite it only lasting like 15 minutes. You must embrace the ephemeral. You must be willing to love things that may not love you back, that might betray you, or that may die an untimely death. As the great philosopher Mr. Mitchell Lee Hedberg said "I'm not gonna stop doing something because of what happens at the end."
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murasaki-cha · 1 year ago
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I'm rereading TLT because I have horrible impulse control and i will never get over the stark contrast of the Lotus Casino scenes of both the movie and book
Because movie Percy's like:
Percy: *high on lotus flowers having the time of his life* This is amazing~
Poseidon: *godly whispera in his brain* Percy you're in trouble get out of there
Percy: Oh sh*t he's right! We gotta go
Meanwhile the absolute perfection book Percy goes:
Percy: *while playing games* Oh man I having a great time! I feel warm and happy and relaxed and safe and enjoying life! I have not felt this amazing in years!
Percy:.....
Percy: something's horribly wrong
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nadjasnandor · 1 month ago
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What We Do in the Shadows | 6.01. - "The Return of Jerry"
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watmalik · 3 months ago
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I sometimes wish Logan knew about Hugh Jackman like Wade knows of Ryan Reynolds, sighs. I just know he'd lose his shit when he sees what this man (that kinda looks like him) does for the other dude that looks like his boyfriend lmao
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bet-on-me-13 · 1 year ago
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Danny goes on Vacation and leaves his job to his Co-workers
So! Danny hasn't had a break from his Hero Career since the day he turned into a Ghost. He has been constantly fighting battle after battle against his worst enemies one after the other.
Even after joining the Justice League, he didn't really have a chance to take a break. He never really asked for help because it didn't seem like a big enough deal to bother them with. He just kept on working.
Until the day he accidently mentioned this to one of his Co-workers, and they practically Force him to take a Vacation.
He has been fighting Crime, nearly every single day since he was 14, with at most a day or two in between battles for all that time, and he is now entering his 20's. They are horrified that he never asked them for help, no matter how easy the job may have been.
After a while of convincing him, they eventually get him to agree to tale a Month-Long Vacation.
He actually gets really excited after he agrees, and he is planning on exploring deep space for the entire month. He is actually really looking forwards to it now, and seeing this everyone who volunteered to take over his Patrols all promise that they will absolutely not bother him until the trip is done.
So, Danny leaves for his Vacation and the other Heroes set up shop in Amity Park.
Danny left them instructions on how to deal with Ghosts, how to pacify specific Rogues, and how to sent them back to the Ghost Zone when they are done. They feel like they are fairly well prepared for their Month Long Mission, especially since Danny described it as a very easy job.
Then the first Rogue Attack happened.
The team dispatched there, made up of a few mid-level JLA Members and some JLD Members for safe measure, takes nearly an Hour to defeat the Ghost. And they barely manage it.
They are surprised at how hard it is, but are even more surprised when they find out that the "Box Ghost" is labeled as a Low-Level Nuisance.
So, they call in a few higher level members to help. They do not want to interrupt Danny's Vacation.
Then they have to call in more JLA members, and again, and again.
By the time Danny managed to get back from his Vacation, the Founding Members and all JLD have been called in.
He thanks then for the opportunity to finally have a break.
Danny: Seriously, thanks guys. This was the best break I've had in years.
JLA: *out of breath and haggard* yeah dude...no problem...let me just sit down for a minute...whew!
Danny: Oh, I can't wait for the next time I can go on vacation!
JLA: *looking like this: 😐* ...yeah sure bro...
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catmask · 14 days ago
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in nicies news though one of my closest friends saw an old picture of me compare to one of me now and complimented me on how ive gained weight and look much healthier now and im
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irregularjohnnywiggins · 2 years ago
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You ever have those moments where an idea just... won't leave your head?
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jpg-of-dorian-slay · 5 months ago
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love love LOVE jesper fahey so much, kaz rips out someone's eye and tosses them overboard and jesper's just like "would he do that for me?" not at all bothered, just wondering if kaz cares about him enough to kill a guy for him. a man with his priorities absolutely in order.
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cosmicrhetoric · 2 months ago
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my personal fave "luffy holds a mirror up to someone's soul" moments. aka the whole point i think
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nonexistent-alfa · 1 month ago
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LCF readers at the start of the story when the side characters mistook Cale to be a "good person": pfft, you fools. You couldn't have been more wrong about him. You've all just been scammed. That guy is only using you for his own benefit.
LCF readers a few hundred chapters in: wait- they actually were kinda right?? We were the fools who got scammed into believing whatever he said? Goddamn.
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ewwww-what · 7 months ago
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These freaks are not studying (good for them)
Closeups below :)
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dykedvonte · 1 month ago
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Jimmy tries so hard to not let Anya haunt his narrative but she is his narrative and he hates that.
Everything loops back to what he did to her and every hallucination, action and choice he makes or does directly goes back to her and he deserves that strife. She persisted and spoke up and he hates her for it. He can erase her but not her presence over them and that’s the best type of ghost.
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poorly-drawn-mdzs · 7 months ago
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Danse Macabre
[Commission]
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lesbionia · 6 months ago
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Every time a woman says "I'm not going to vote" an angel loses its wings. 💔
Women fought tooth and nail for the right to vote! Voting means having a say, however small, in how your country is run. If you don't use your say, then you can count on being spoken over by the men who are getting out there and voting.
In the name of feminism and in honour of all the women who came before you, PLEASE exercise your right to vote! 🗳️
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