#inside of me there is two wolfs

[occudo]

Love the conflicting tones of Archive Gang hijinx versus Gertrude fighting monsters. The latest comic with Michael made me realize that Gertrude's original archival staff would have had fun at work, too. Fiona, Emma, Eric, then Sarah and Michael. Living their lives until suddenly, the fun is over.

Anyway. Hoping we get to see more of Mike Crew's tummy. 😄

Thank you!

[stopitlight]

there are two wolves inside of me. one is wolf 359. one is wolf 359's clone that i've locked outside my space station in the middle of a solar flare.

[howsharpie]

hmmmmmm

starts falling from the heavens when

[handbarfs]

WOLFLIPPAAAWOOOOOOO

[azuresins]

[hana-bobo-finch]

oughhhh ok perhaps I made fluffy dinyon mother pill

nobody can hear his yippee in space……his dignity is saved…..

[ikuzeminna]

What's up with the wolves?

This post made me want to talk about Duo and how he was initially conceived as Gundam Wing's protagonist, but instead of derailing OP’s post with my ramblings, I thought it better to make them a separate post.

We all know this shot of Duo in the first opening, and like many others I, too, have wondered why on Earth the American street urchin character would be sporting heraldic wolves on his jacket as though he’s European nobility.

They never show up in the series proper, just the opening. And there is absolutely nothing about Duo that could remotely relate him to nobility. He's pretty much the furthest thing from it.

...unless we count Deathscythe H's design, which does sport a strong romantic death theme. But that's about as European as Duo gets.

So what if this is the creators being cheeky and including it as a nod to his initial protagonist status before it was given to Heero? Because if Duo was the protagonist, that would mean he would have been Relena's foil, who is of royal blood. And then we would have had the same juxtaposition as this:

Oh, look, another orphan wearing fancy clothing.

But back to Duo. The precise term for what Duo has emblazoned on his jacket is a wolf rampant. Well, two actually. Would that make them combatant..?

When they're mirrored like that, you expect them to hold a shield. Like these two unicorns here:

Do you recognize it? It's Romefeller's crest. Romefeller has two white unicorns rampant on a red background while the guy who fights them gets two golden wolves rampant on a black background.

Wait a minute. White, red, gold, black?

Really?

Someone must have had a field trip with the designs.

Back to the wolves. According to Wikiwand, wolves in heraldry "typically symbolised the rewards of perseverance in long sieges or hard industry." A long siege is definitely what the colonists were going through. Doubly so regarding Duo's crappy childhood.

So is Duo really connected to wolves?

Well, here's a fun fact.

The wolf (French: loup) is often used for canting (meaning heraldic bearings that represent the bearer's name in a visual pun or rebus) by families whose names feature some variant of the word 'lou/wolf'. Examples include Videlou, de Lou, Lupus, Wolferston, Wolseley, Lovett, Lowe, Lovell, Lupton or Wolfe.

Lowe. As in, Odin Lowe. This dude:

Heero got cheated out of fancy wolf crests.

And here you have it. Before Heero stole Deathscythe's parts for Wing, Duo had gotten Heero's wolf crest. Then again, they would have been wasted on Heero's green tank top anyway, so good for Duo.

[bloodspillmlm]

the fact that i don’t look exactly like him is TRANSPHOBIC AS FUCK

[soullessjack]

something i was thinking about at work is jacks insecurity about being a burden to the Winchesters + Cas and how much that fits into the autistic lens of his character. obviously it starts with the fact that Sam and Dean were essentially forced into taking care of him at first because of the circumstances surrounding. Literally everything. but it goes beyond that all the way to jack just being what he is and that being inherently dangerous.

for one thing, the bunker (Jack’s only beloved home ever)

initially, the only reason sam and dean agreed to take Jack back to the bunker at all was to safeguard the public from his then-uncontrolled powers, and in last holiday mrs butters also suggests that they’re only keeping him there so he can’t destroy anyone else like he did mary (which jack doesn’t even fight against so.. maybe he’s fine with it being that way?)

then when you come to jacks powers themselves:

they are fundamentally [part of] what makes him different. they’re part of what makes jack dangerous. he can’t have public meltdowns or show extreme anger (or even any frustration, really) without there being consequences — the consequences of someone else getting hurt-or-worse by him, and him being perceived more negatively & fearfully each time it happens. those consequences are just added to the burden jack feels he brings to his family, which breeds guilt and frustration in jack for how he feels he’s affecting them and disappointing their expectations.

this in turn is why jack is so abrasive whenever the guys try to comfort or reassure him. it’s rejection sensitive dysphoria with a little more C4 to it, basically. and speaking from my own experiences, when you’re constantly in a state of low self image or rejection sensitivity, it creates a cycle of eggshell walking and people pleasing—putting all of your focus and energy into managing the feelings of others because you assume the slightest slip-up will make them upset or disappointed or even hate you.

you react to the idea of being rejected before it even happens, and even if it doesn’t happen, because at the core of it all you already perceive yourself in a rejective way.

and that’s exactly what happened between jack and mary after he tortured Nick.

after he’s done, jack turns to mary, ‘flushed with pride’ and grinning about what he did. it was cathartic and sickeningly enjoyable to do. but when he sees the horror on her face as she just says “what did you do?” his pride ‘curdles to shame.’ he’s already sensing rejection for what he’s done, and tries to justify it to mary, and somewhat console her; Nick was a killer who deserved it, and Sam and Dean would’ve been grateful for his death. if Mary thinks something is wrong with him for what he did then she’s the one who’s wrong, actually.

mary (honestly god bless her for still being sympathetic & patient with jack after that) just gently tries to tell him: “something’s wrong. it’s not your fault. you just need help and we’ll help you because you’re family and we love you,” but all jack hears is “something is wrong with you and it scares me. YOU scare me. I’m going to tell the others that something is wrong with you and they’ll be scared of you, too.” **

I don’t think i need to explain in-depth how jack loves his family a very normal and healthy amount, but suffice it to say that he’s established to have a deep fear of, and inability/unwillingness to accept, losing them. he can’t think about it because he hates thinking about it. he’d do anything for them (like self sacrifice or slowly burning a man alive) and to be with them again (like necromancy and unleashing biblical plagues upon nonbelievers).

so when jack perceives that the Winchesters would reject/hate/fear him because of what he did to nick—because there’s something wrong with him—he starts spiraling right there, and he can’t accept that Mary still loves him and wants to help him; he doesn’t even think he can be helped. he can’t deal with any of the rejections he’s perceiving and just wants to be left alone…..

I was going to try and reroute this post back to the whole burden thing, but it’s 3am and I’m losing my train of thought. TLDR i just think it’s very autistic for jacks nature to be narratively framed as both a burden and a threat and also something that just wants to be loved for what it is even though it knows it’s difficult ……. yeagj

**additionally i think he does the same when Rowena refuses to help but I’m getting too sleepy to write that in

Goodnight everypony (<__>)

[902186]

thinking about kurapika and chrollo and parallels and this circle of horrors where they are the victims AND the tools of their fates.

they both think they are neither or more like they don't care about it at all. they don't see themselves as victims, and they see absolutely no other way to live other than this role they took upon themselves. kurapika had such a strong sense of identity and what he wanted to do with his life and understands himself perfectly at all times. he was a part of his clan, but he was more an individual than anything else. kuroro, on the other hand, never knowing, never thinking what his motives are, deliberately not understanding himself and desperately holding on to the spider. he can't be an individual but with others, he can be the spider.

and for both of them, it all started on vengeance. kurapika abandoned himself in order to become a tool, a weapon, to avenge his clan, and to collect scarlet eyes. he stopped being himself and became his people. kuroro didn't know his family, didn't know where he actually came from, didn't know who he was or what he was supposed to be. so growing up in meteor city, he held on to his people strongly. and in order to avenge and protect his people, he would become a tool, a weapon, he would give himself to them. he started being himself as he became his people.

kuroro could be something for his people. and kurapika could be nothing for his people.

kurapika took on the role of judgement for vengeance. kuroro took on the role of villain for vengeance. kurapika acted his part by diminishing everything he was, and kuroro acted his part by filling up his identity with it.

but one thing stays clear and fixed with them throughout it all. they would do anything for their people. for whomever they consider their people. "he'll put his friends before his mission." a weakness kuroro sees in kurapika so quickly and so easily. but the same thing he considers a strength in himself. "i am not your top priority. it is the spider that must be kept alive." as long as his people are alive, his identity will live on. and as long as kurapika is alive, his people’s identity will live on.

"now you will get to experience the pain of losing your home." kuroro (and the spiders) killing the kurta clan set this parallel in motion for himself as the circle began for kurapika. and (speculatively) kurta clan hurting his people was what set the circle in motion for kuroro, too. now thinking about where they are in the story and how their end could be, it is very clear that they are finally ending up in a place where they mirror each other (as they have from the beginning) and they can recognise it in each other and themselves. kurapika ending up empty after his mission and kuroro ending up empty after losing spiders. both of them purposeless and with no self left outside of it. in a way, this is how the circle ends. "i can hear that he accepted death." they walk with death every day with no fear and full acceptance and after losing the only thing they live for, not even something they hold on to because they don't see a point in being alive outside of the fact that they must keep going for their people, for their purpose, and if not then there's no reason to exist, they are meaningless.

kuroro's vengeance left kurapika all alone, with everyone he knew dead, and feeling hollow at the end. by fate, he ended up all alone, with everyone he knew dead and feeling hollow at the end.

and at that point, they will have to start a new page and build a new self for themselves.

[carniferous]

wip (it out!)

share whatever project you're working on right now, except 'project' is incredibly open ended. It could be fic, original writing, playlists, art, crafts, whatever it is you're doing!

i was tagged by my darling beloved @itsjaywalkers

long time no snippet... have a lengthy one from the postwar fic:

“What are you doing here, Regulus?”

“I—” a pause, followed by a shaky inhale, Regulus’s habit when he was trying to collect himself, “I live here.”

James blinked, looked at him once again. “What?”

“This is Islington. I live less than a block away,” said Regulus. “Didn’t you know that?”

Of course James knew that. He’d known exactly where he was, and he’d known exactly what neighborhood he was near, but he never, not in a million years, not for his life, could have imagined that—

“You’re still living in Grimmauld Place?”

Something flickered across Regulus’s face, too quick for James to decipher. “Of course I am.”

If James had the presence of mind, he might’ve managed to rouse some bitterness from within him. But he was never that good at being bitter, and he was still struggling to process the shock of this—this ghost, this memory standing alive before him—so all he did was stare owlishly, uncomprehendingly at Regulus.

“It’s my home,” Regulus said after a long beat, a touch furtive. “Where else would I go?”

James thought of many responses to that, each ruder and more honest than the last, but he bit his tongue. What rights did he have over Regulus anymore? What right did he ever have to tell Regulus where he should go, what place he should call home? Regulus had always taken great pains to correct him on that account, to put him in his place, and now when James looked at him he could only recall being sixteen and embarrassed and pathetically heartsick.

i have no clue who's already done this but i'll tag: @foursaints @sommerregenjuniluft @veryinnovative @sugarsnappeases and @withtheoldstars

[nostalgicfun]

January 1999

[thief-of-eggs]

Every so often I randomly get it in me to comment on practically every single post I see. I’ll be dropping random thoughts and opinions and encouragements that no one asked for left and right. Everything is lovely and thought evoking and you all must know it!!

And the best part??? I won’t comment on anything for the next 30-40 business days.

[bonk9999]

There's two artist inside of me...

The silly/wholesome cartoonish dude!! vs The depressed delusional artist with daddy issues...

[hellyeahmfwitchcrafttime]

honestly Hestia for some reason reminds me of fall, like fall is HER season and I think thats absolutely amazing, I think mainly her color scheme and attributes with the hearth/home is why, idk man but I fucking love Hestia and she deserves this season

[thefloatingstone]

How do people consistently draw self indulgent ship art with monster characters like this?? I am so fucking embarrassed every minute I am working on this picture.

How do ya'll do this???? ALL THE TIME????