#inktober is bringing me great joy this year

[ickmick]

oh my god its the guy

BREAKING: Sculk cub returns, all thrilled

[skullzanta]

Sign up for The Great Skeleton War! Hatch from your skins folks! We have to RISE back into action! We have lost the spirit for much of the past years, but THIS Spooktober, I want to see us Revived! Not for Nostalgia, not for some cringey stupidity, but for what we have to gain! Like Inktober, The Great Skeleton War is about creativity and encouraging an entire month to fun events and united efforts, BUT! Unlike Inktober, we forgot what The Great Skeleton War even meant to us, it was a challenge to make memes out of silly skeletons and bones, we felt it cringe to use the shortsighted memes like Mr Skeltal, and/or we failed to re-excite ourselves...

But me? I saw a challenge to post Bone-Based Content for a month, Not out of obligation, but for the same reason of Inktober, to bring and drive creativity! But, I as well saw that we had seasonal heroes and legends, copypasta'd too much or not, and we had FUN with it. We celebrated this way to demonstrate our love for these silly ideas and memes, like "Spooky Scary Skeletons" and now...? You see it almost nowhere... Why NOT Have a month where Artists Ink the tober and Those other creatives have joyous fun and party our bones right out of our skins?! TO Spook and Scare not in blackened hearts but in frivolity and PASSION for a world WE lovingly achknowledge as a Hellsite? Come on! Lets party hard and Share the Joy of Simple stupid bones and hatch right out of our bodies so we can dance to silly songs, make abominations out of PNGs, Share silly GIFs most would find outdated, And above all? Confuse the everloving HELL out of everyone out of the loop... "Didn't this die?" So did this hellsite, so why not? Join us, and let us re-kindle the cringey Skeleton War Roleplays and memes, let us celebrate them for the month!

[not-poignant]

I think it's so amazing, how you write and you put it online for other people to enjoy. I mean, I know it's your job now, but at first it was your hobby that you did for yourself (and still is, I hope) and it's so cool that you can produce something that brings so much joy into others lives. Almost a symbiotic relationship. (1/2)

Be that as it may, please take care of yourself, Pia. I know it's very important to you to stick to your schedule, but your health is important too! And I know I speak for everyone when I say that we'd rather you take care of yourself first, even if that means a hiatus. I'm sorry if I come off as patronizing, I know you can take care of yourself! I just want you to know that we'll understand if you need to take a break after writing half a million words in like two months (!!!)

***

Okay okay it’s not half a million words yet! I haven’t even hit half a million for the year yet! (I will this month x.x).

(Also is it weird that I also think of it as a symbiotic relationship? I really do. Fandom has taught me about the joy of like, the collaboration that happens between writers and readers - both as a writer and a reader - and it’s something I love so much).

In good news though, I’m actually going to be taking five days off from the scheduled writing. I’ll still be working on Falling Falling Stars if I feel like it, but starting from probably Tuesday or Wednesday, it’s five consecutive days since I hit my monthly minimum wordcount so early. Tbh I’m really looking forward to it. I’m going to play Hades, and probably do some Inktober stuff.

I still think of fanfiction as my hobby actually, and I’m really glad to do it. Fanfiction isn’t my job, even if original fiction is. And fanfiction helps keep me sane. But I have other hobbies too, like cross-stitch, gaming, gardening (when I have the spoons), art, piano etc.

Unfortunately I am kind of doggedly obligated to my schedule (for no other reason than that’s the kind of person I am, not because anyone is making me feel this way). I am a sick person raised by a workaholics, who is a workaholic myself, and I see a therapist about it, because it’s why I’m a lot sicker overall. Hence the five day break! <3333

You didn’t come off as patronising at all, honestly. Like if I felt like I was hanging in there and doing well, I’d just say so, but while I’m still super enjoying the writing, I’m needing to sleep a lot at the moment, and I’m having X-Rays this week because the arthritis in my hands has hit an ‘oh shit’ level. So yeah, a break is due! I’ve been lax on my breaks since July, but no I’m absolutely taking it this week, and it’s gonna be great :D

[hjertetssunnegalskap1]

Fictober 19 Day 1 - “It will be fun, trust me” (Skam)

Okay, I originally only planned to do Inktober. Nothing more. But then I saw this list of Fictober prompts and I couldn’t stay away. So, I have decided to write a drabble or two that might fit my ink doodles. Here’s my first attempt, for day 1. “It will be fun, trust me.” Hope you like it!

Day 1 - “It will be fun, trust me”

“It will be fun, trust me.” Even only sounds half-convinced by his own words. 

Isak offers him a half-smile for the effort. They’re standing in Even’s grandma’s huge garden, surrounded by apple trees. The branches of the trees spread out around them, and it’s a party of colors, of chaos and order, of greens and reds and sunshine. It’s a beautiful garden. Even’s family is kinda the Steiner-school, lefties and old hippies, family, but his grandma still lives in a huge villa, here in Bærum. It’s all a little bit confusing, but at least the Bech Næsheim family throws some mean parties. 

Today, they’re having an apple party, where friends and family hang around all day, picking apples and playing games and even making apple pies. It’s amazing how many different games you can make with apples, actually. The whole thing is mostly for the kids, although the adults seem to enjoy it just as much at times. Especially when they find the apple pies and the wine in the evening. It’s just that… the whole thing can be a little loud. Even’s family is known for their great discussions, where they solve all the problems in the world. And the kids are even louder, of course. And since Isak and Even don’t have kids, they end up helping a lot. With Even’s impulsivity and Isak’s sense of order, things tend to become a little messy. And they always end up being tired as fuck when the day is over.

“Well, fun or not, at least we’ll get some good apple pie,” Isak sighs. “Come on, let’s go,” he says, starting to move up the alley towards the white house. 

Even takes his hand and holds him back. He looks at something at the end of the garden. “Look, grandma got someone to cut down that old, sick tree.” He points at a log and some twigs that lie by the shed, and a small smile plays in the corner of his mouth. “I remember that I used to climb that, when I was little,” he muses. 

Isak can’t stop his smile as he imagines a tiny Even running around in the garden and climbing trees. He allows Even to drag him towards the log and the branches, lying on the ground. They kneel down, and Even touches the log, staring at it. “Wow, I can’t believe how emotional I feel, just from an old tree.”

Isak reaches for him and grips his shoulder. “Well, I get it,” he just says. He kneels closer to the log, and lets his fingers follow the tree rings. “Wow, it’s an old tree, for sure.” 

“Each ring is a year, right?” Even smiles. “I’ve known you for three of these rings.” He looks quickly at Isak, smiling even wider. “Hey! It’s October!”

“Yeah…” Isak meets his blue shining eyes, wondering where he’s is going with this. 

“We’ve known each other for exactly three years, Isak!”

Oooh… 

“Wow, yeah,” Isak smiles. It feels like ages ago that they met, at the same time as it feels like just yesterday. He remembers how Even made him feel both jittery with infatuation and calm as if he’d found home. And here they are, still together, and Even still makes him feel both jittery and calm, as well as a lot of other things. Right now he looks yummy in his soft hoodie, all bright eyes and soft lips. Isak almost trips as he moves forward and kisses Even. “It’s been three fucking amazing years,” he murmurs. 

Even looks at him, and blinks. “You mean that?”

“Of course I do!” 

Even drags a hand through his hair, and even though he smiles a crooked smile, he can’t hide a hint of insecurity. “I doubt that you think it’s amazing when you have to remind me that I have left another cup standing in the hallway, or when I have one of my bad days, and don’t get up from bed at all, or when I fuck up and forget something important.” 

Isak scoffs. “Just like you probably don’t think it’s amazing when I’m grumpy or sarcastic or nag on you.” He shifts a little. Sometimes he can’t believe that Even stands him, with how grumpy he can be. He takes a deep breath. “I know that we piss each other off at times, but we always manage to get back to each other and talk things through, right?”

“Yeah, that’s true.”

“Yeah, we do. So, yeah. I love it all, Even.” 

Even looks at him with his intense, blue eyes, and then he nods. “Same here.” He swallows dryly, as if Isak’s words really mean a lot. 

Isak can’t keep his hands off him. He lets his finger stroke over Even’s arm. “Good. I’m in for the whole package, you see.”

Even smiles and raises his eyebrows. “Including these stupid apple parties with my weird family and all the chaos they bring?”

Isak smiles. “Yeah, especially with all of that.” He drags Even to his feet, and they look at each other, smiling.

“I’ll steal one of grandma’s beers for you,” Even says, winking. “If it helps surviving the deep red wine discussions that definitely will come later.”

“Oh, I’ll count on it.” Isak holds Even gently, cupping his face, leaning forward and softly kissing him on the lips. He sighs. Warmth radiates from the spot where their lips meet, slowly spreading through the rest of him.

When Isak draws back, he’s almost dizzy. “Ready, then?” he asks. 

“Yeah,” Even breathes. He gazes at Isak lovingly, his eyes soft with tenderness. “Ready for more apple parties, grumpiness and messiness and more tree rings to come.”

Cheesy fucker. 

Isak grins, almost buzzing with the heat and joy he feels from within. He takes Even’s hand. “Sounds good. Let’s go, then, and have some fun.”  

[daily-grian]

some more additions

As someone who runs a daily blog and an askblog, truly nothing makes your art improve more than getting obsessed with a thing and drawing it over and over and over with no real goal in mind. Hyperfixation go brrrr. It's really fun to see over time. I too had never finished an inktober before but uh. here we are.

Seriously though starting this blog I was mostly neutral towards Grian, i just like to draw bird people so I knew i wouldn't get sick of it really fast, and I made my Grian design intentionally to be able to draw no matter how awful I was feeling so I would miss as few days as possible.

My askblog was a similar story - I was mostly neutral towards the character but the act of making the blog made me obsessed. Eight years later that blog is still running. Over one year later this blog is still running. now im legally obligated to call both my favorites.

Getting more mods definitely helps for the gaps, or just asking your friends if they wanna do a silly purposefully bad doodle or something. Not having the pressure to make a good drawing every day helps tons. I just draw my silly little guys and it brings me joy.

The competition to see which daily blog lasts the longest is real and Daily-ethoslab and I are winning, I think < /joke /joke i love all the other dailies even if they aren't daily (there is no pressure to continue a daily blog if you dont want to but the friendly competitive spirit is real. its kinda fun.)

The queue tip is absolutely correct. If you feel motivated to draw more then pre-plan some dailies. Honestly I like to keep some in the drafts just to have as back-up.

"for the love of god be self-indulgent" SO TRUE. I made this blog entirely to be self-indulgent (drawing bird people). for real you can literally do anything for a daily isnt that awesome. There's a good number of drawings on this blog that are "i am going to draw Grian with somebody just as an excuse to draw the other person"

Asking friends or your following for ideas is great. People also sometimes submit guest dailies which is helpful.

Like daily-scott said, do not be discouraged by numbers! dont compare yourself to others! just do your own thing. vibe. this goes for any creative endeavor shared on the internet imo, or just in general.

I have so much respect for you how do you keep the motivation to draw the same character every day I've only been doing this for like a month and you're well past 600 days how

-head mod of a daily character blog

I like seeing the number go up

This is a good way to track my art improvement

ethoslab is epic

originally it was "competition" with the other dailys to see who could last the longest (this competition only existed to me btw)

honestly it's kinda funny

I like Ethoslab

I don't hold myself to a high standard of art quality, I post depending on how much effort I WANT to put in

Honestly? I don't think i can stop

I was gonna type that I hope etho would be proud but tbh he would prob just go

"😐👍 OK"

I think if etho saw this and didn't immediately block me, he would look for a day I missed lol

Tbh I can't tell you how Im doing this. Before this account I had never completed an inktober before. I couldn't last a month drawing daily.

By day 15 of this account I was running out of ideas. I genuinely don't know how I got this far?? I wish I could give advice?

[orionsangel86]

Everytime I see fluffy/ kissy Destiel fanart all I can think is "ITS WHAT THEY DESERVE"

I KNOOOOOOW! it makes my heart leap and I just want them to be happy dammit!

I love Inktober this year. It’s so awesome because I am seeing so much great art work from so many awesome bloggers who I NEVER KNEW WERE ARTISTS, it’s encouraged me to pick up a pencil for the first time in 10 years and I’m seeing so much amazing destiel fan art (as well as general supernatural fanart) on my dash and it is bringing me so much joy!

Also, since I am shameless and a little bit proud, here are links to my own destiel themed fanart through Inktober. I’m no fancy digital artist, but I worked hard on these and think they came out pretty good considering. :)

Day 2 - Wardrobe

Day 4 - Scars

Day 5 - Feathers

Day 6 - Lips

[mnemoiisms]

Ｔｈａｎｋ Ｙｏｕ

Where do I even start?

When I started up this blog two years, I never expected to be welcomed so openly and quickly by this community. I never expected Trepanto receive so much attention from all these people. I created this blog because I thought this little brain bastard was so under appreciated and didn’t get enough credit for what he could do in so little amount of panels in the comics, and I wanted to bring him to life.

I’m amazed how welcoming the Transformers community, regardless of media, is and how loving you all are to one another. Honestly, its like walking downstairs on Christmas morning to find so many presents all with your name on it. Every morning has been a blessing.

I’m getting personal but…having this blog has helped me so much through dark times in my life. I could always count on seeing something here to cheer me up, be it hilarious fan art or events that get the whole dash involved like that ’Gladiator Erotica’ antics or Inktober events, even God and mer-formers have brought me joy. I’ve been a lot happier since joining.

I’ve met so many new friends, though I have not yet been able to see them in person. They’ve created a great and positive impact on my life and the way I portray Trepan. Thank you to @illogicalshockwave for being one of the best friends of 2016/17 when I met her, to @resignedwarlord for the Trepan x Megatron Crack that slowly stopped becoming crack, to @retired-rung for mailing me the goods that is Poptarts and our random 3am conversations,  to @littlebundleofbolts for being my wheelie wife since the day you backhanded a customer with a chair at Macadam’s Oil House to @lord-overlips for the trip to Underwater World and vegemite regrets, and to @cruel-singer for helping Trepan become the best cocktail garnish the Peaceful Tyranny has ever seen. Why we weren’t friends sooner is mystery, but I’m so glad that we did cross paths.

Thank you to @vietalis @panzer-the-tank @under-constructicons @pacifist-bartender @trustme-imamedic @thatspikybastard @wingedcommander @warforger @tertiaxdecima @lobe-the-mnemosurgeon @decepticoncoward @morethanparanoia @verformen-sturm @airachnidphobia @horns-and-heels @facelessgunformer @gvzzle @radioactivibee @unsurpent @therisingdarkness @verdigrisprowl @voptothetop @warmwired @trepanophiliac @heightfeared and everyone else who may not be tagged but every single one of you are simply perfect and you have all brought a huge smile to my face every day. I’m proud to be apart of this community and proud to call you all my friends!

Finally, thank you to all the people who are no longer with us. You may not have logged in for a while, but we still remember the joy of your threads and the love in your tags, so maybe one day when you come back you’ll see this and know we never truly forget you.

You are all such amazing people, and I’m so overjoyed to know you like the way I portray Trepan. You guys are the best!

[finsterhund]

Finsterhund’s 2017 Summary of Art (and by extension, the rest of my life)

I’d be lying if I said that 2017 wasn’t an incredibly difficult year for the easily excitable finsterhund but it was also a very productive year for my art. I’m not going to deny that. A lot of issues came about that pushed me really hard, and I did break, but I mended too. I grew stronger in some ways. My writing took a nosedive and I’m not sure how to repair that, but my art, well... this is the first time I’ve ever done one of these. That should speak for itself.

In some months it was difficult to pick which one. I decided against choosing ones that may have been partially rotoscoped (such as my reaction images and most memes) and also because I tend to draw too similar to reference images I use. So no redraws of blurry HoD concept art or stuff.

January: [x]

This was supposed to be the picture for holidays 2016 but I’m a lazy earth boy who must’ve been slacking off because I finished and posted it right on January first! I remember at the time I was really proud of this one, and spent a lot of time on it. It was drawn traditionally and then scanned and digitized in GIMP... yes gimp. Fishy loved it and that made me happy. Nowadays I can pick apart so many flaws, especially in Andy. The lines look so shaky! Maybe I’ll redraw it for January 1st 2018! Assuming I don’t slack off again.

February: [x]

It was hard picking one from this month because I didn’t really like my drawings from then. Here’s art in paint of Red Spot eating a burger. I used to draw him with food when I was hungry for a while. Mmmmmm borger.

March: [x]

This is the month things started to take a nosedive. There was lots of good things happening, but some bad stuff too. A few new problems arose, but at the time the biggest was I found out my birth mom was being evicted and I would have to help her clear the old house. THAT old house. I retreated heavily into my artistic comforts and drew a lot of pictures of Red Spot being comforting and supportive to Andy. Red was created for that purpose after all, and Andy being a character I so closely identify with ended up being the comfort I needed especially then. Despite its crudeness in ms paint I do love this picture and should redraw it in Sai at some point.

April: [x]

The trials I had to face were unreal this month. The Wannabe War(tm) is well underway, and the time to return to the old house rapidly approached. I drew like there was no tomorrow, and these paint pictures were the best. Smoother lines, and more detail. When the time came to face that house things got ugly. Mom hid that my dog Jack had been dead for over half a year and broke the news only when I became distraught when I arrived and he didn’t come when I called him. My fixation on the “monkey’s paw” that was ruining everything I ever wished for started around here, and I kept breaking down. Bad regressing back to before I left that place happened. But something else did too. I DIDN’T. STOP. DRAWING. I drew more and more. Choosing to bring my laptop allowed me to make more pictures. A lot of Red Spot and Andy comfort ones, some mean little immature vent comics, and memes. Lots of memes. I was able to do the job I went there to do and returned home exhausted but VICTORIOUS. My art? Well I think I actually improved a lot then. It was predominantly due to surviving in spite of everything and the sheer volume of cruddy little paint drawings. I didn’t want to pick a mean comic and already had one ms paint Andy and Red picture in this line up so here’s a surprisingly detailed xenomorph queen being licked by a prequel era character who is a massive spoiler. Not only were both characters very complicated to draw, but I’m genuinely shocked I was able to draw an xenomorph at all.

May: [x]

After the painful embarrassment of April I tried really hard to relax. I was still really scared and anxious about the Wannabe incident, but it had more or less turned into a post-arms race stalemate where he wasn’t really doing anything and I just had my weapons of mass destruction pointed at him with my grubby little orange paw over the launch button which is where things have been ever since. My art took a relaxation break, but it was still steadily getting better. Late May I wanted to come up with a reason to actually celebrate my birthday (June 3rd) so I did a silly little “June is International Heart of Darkness month” post featuring Red and Andy sharing a slice of chocolate cake. I went on to say that June 3rd was “International draw heart of darkness fan art” day (real smooth you egocentric mutt) but I thought it’d be a good way to actually celebrate the day but make it about the video game that gave me a reason to live another year instead of about me aging, as I openly hate that I grow older.

June: [x]

A few of my friends drew HoD stuff this month, but a lot of my friends were busy due to jobs, school, life, etc. We used to be a lot more active in 2015 and even in 2016 so this did hit me pretty hard. As a result, I become very frustrated and out of spite decide it’s finally time to test my “new toy.” I don’t remember when Kale actually gave me his old tablet, but in June I finally install its drivers, get a copy of paint tool sai, and draw a lot with it. At first I hate these pictures and go back to paint whenever possible. There’s something wrong with my copy of sai and windows 10 doesn’t like the drivers. But I push myself, and I start to make more pictures of Andy, Whisky, Red Spot, etc. Not a lot of my early Sai pictures ever got posted or even made it past the inking stage, but one night I just couldn’t sleep so I drew Andy cradled in the crook of Red’s wing and got it to the flat colors stage.

July: [x]

I try to calm down. it’s a good month I think. Not much happens. It’s the month I finally give myself a new fursona. I decided that Red Spot isn’t “me” and I can’t use Andy in furry communities so I come up with a solution. It... it’s just Andy as a doberman. It’s a little orange doberman that wears a red bandanna and Andy’s hat... Doberman Andy. But he’s cute, and I can draw him, and so I do draw him. And he helps me get better at drawing in Sai.

August: [x]

The month of the solar eclipse! Me and my friend were going to go down to the US to see it together and... nope... that plan fell through. It makes me a brat, but that’s okay because I can just draw six hundred thousand drawings of Andy. That’ll help me feel better. I ended up having a sabbatical from my blog after some people on tumblr began to bother me and I put up a drawing of Andy’s shoe so nobody could go in. This is an MS Paint picture! Sadly, I’ve stopped really drawing in the program. I like how I did Andy’s face even if his hat and hair weren’t the best.

September: [x]

I return from my sabbatical and begin to spam my tumblr with Andy drawings I’m making in paint tool sai. The quality and style of Andy in these pictures varies drastically as I try a whole manner of new things. At one point I make a post that has five color pictures of Andy in it. It’s slowly becoming difficult to pick which picture I wanted to put here. Not because I didn’t like any, but because I liked too many. SMOL Andy was probably my favourite of the bunch. I made him more chibi and cute than I normally do. It was on accident but I thought he was too cute to go back and make him more on-model.

October: [x]

I was supposed to do an Andy version of Inktober but I guess the extreme amount of Andy pictures was a September thing because I burned out relatively quickly. I had some drama involving a prototype disc and also ended up having to pay way too much extra money every month until further notice but it’s a relatively calm month all things considering. The way I drew Andy in this art isn’t particularly stellar, but I love what I did with Red’s mouth and nose. I wanted to show that the way I draw Red improved too.

November: [x]

My chronic pain gets worse for no good reason, I get a very disturbing creeper threatening me online, and I’m generally depressed, but I’m drawing. That’s good. I start a new revolutionary technique when I rely almost entirely on the cinematics as reference and don’t reference other cartoon styles whenever I can when it comes to drawing Andy. I enjoy the result. Drawing him in a cute penguin-themed suit made my day. It was so hard to decide which one to pick this month. I loved so many of them.

December: [x]

Like November, but somewhat better I think. I’m still drawing Andy a lot, with Red coming along for the ride too. This one I tried to draw Andy in a more Disney-like style. I love how I did his face and freckles. The drawing of Whisky from the same post is great too. I look at a lot of my newer drawings and feel genuinely pleased with the result. I think I actually am improving, and whilst I think it is due a lot to getting sai and a tablet, it can also be because I’m becoming more skilled and getting more practice as well. Lets hope the new year brings us smooth sailing, lots of fun, and happy times our way. HoD will be 20 in 2018 and I’m ready to bring the subject of my love and joy a great two decade celebration.

[somestoriessomewhereelse]

Inktober 2019

1 – Ring

I love you. I always have and I always will. And I love you enough to be sure you’re my one. I want you by side always and forever. But I won’t make the same mistake twice: I won’t buy you a ring. I won’t trap you in a promise, promises can lead only to disappointment. I love you and I let you free to love me back unconditionally. Because I know you will.

2 – Mindless

“Don’t think, just obey.”, that’s how you prefer them right? When they is so high and gone they can’t say you “no” anymore. Well, too bad for you I’m not like them, I can’t stop my train of thoughts even if I wanted it – and trust me, I want it, so bad. I can’t be the mindless slut you’d like to fuck in the club’s bathroom. But here’s a secret: just pretend that you love me and I’ll be yours.

3 – Bait

Once upon a time there was this gorgeous rose in the garden. I smelt her heady scent first, taking deep intoxicating breaths. I couldn’t take my eyes off of her, and her carmine petals was lips I wanted to kiss forever. I was in love – so I thought. One windy night I was fascinated by her dancing with the moon, and my body suddenly moved to hers, against hers, to share this dance. But I had forgotten the truth about roses: the most beautiful, the deathliest their thorns.

4 – Freeze

The water’s blue, the ice is cold, when I see you my heart sees gold.

I don’t know what to write today, my mind is like an ice cube. I need some warm human flesh to make my body anew in motion. Thank god it’s Friday!

5 – Build

How can I build anything when I have no strong foundations to begin with? How can I make today a beautiful day after such a wonderful party who left me happiest but so empty? I'm the opposite of Persephone, with no strenght to rebuilt the day what I destroyed during the night.

6 – Husky

I love being on all fours, showing you everyting you want to see from me. I’m obedient, I follow orders. But don’t make the mistake of thinking I won’t bite you.

7 – Enchanted

First beat of the song and I’m already under its spell. The drums, the basses, I let myself go and lose every control; my body is not mine anymore, it belongs to the dance-floor, and I’m chained to the rhythm for the night. Being one with the melody, making love with every sound, expressing freedom during hours. This witch is my favorite to be controlled by, and her name is sooo thrilling: the Dance.

8 – Frail

It takes a lot of strength to own ones weaknesses, a lot of courage to be vulnerable. That’s all.

9 – Swing

Turning myself from one bed side to another, having my mood going up in the clouds and below the ground, feeling time through hopes and anxieties, living in contrasts and instability; I introduce to you: the Fall Depression \o/

Fall, what a great synonym of autumn; yeah it really feels like everything dropped.

10 – Pattern

Ok today I won’t talk about bad feelings – even tho it would be soooo easy.

Patterns. I love them, I look for them, they makes me feel safe. When I understand and predict, my Capricorn mind can finally relax. This is why I love astrology: with their chart I can have an approach on people, an insight in their mechanisms and anticipate their reactions, and so behave accordingly. I feel like I can be a better person with them – while knowing that like all beliefs I can also be wrong and do bad stuffs. But I least I know it, and I try my best eh.

11 – Snow

Christmas yeah, holidays why not, but THIS, this is the reason why I’m waiting for winter with so much excitement! To open the stores and see everything so white, so pure, so pristine; to feel like a child again, far away from the muddy wars and the melting ices; just to breath a little and feel at peace one more time.

12 – Dragon

In every Magikarp sleeps a Gyarados, be careful who you underestimate.

And every Gyarados had a Magikarp life, don’t assume they’re always strong.

13 – Ash

“Ashes to ashes, dust to dust”, we are nothing at the scale of the Universe. Life started way before us and prosper way after us, and there is nothing we can do that time won’t erase. But it doesn’t mean there nothing we can do: we can meet people, because it’s in people’s heart we can be remembered. So let’s fall in love, let’s create happiness, let’s bring joy to everyone around. I want to believe that love will last longer than hate, I want to believe y’all will forgive me for the pain I caused, and remember be for the love I brought.

14 – Overgrown

Well Instagram won’t let me talk about my dick soooo…

Being invaded by the Nature… picture it. No more power to charge up our phones, no more wi-fi to connect to others, no more anything just the primal green like millenniums ago. This is what could happen if we lose the fight against the Earth that will take place during the next decade. But what does it have to be a fight? Why can’t we just make peace and work hand in hand with our environment? so there will be only winners. I’m just saying. Because I’m sure if we battle, one way or another we will lose.

15 – Legend

My biggest fear is dying forgotten, is that one day everyone I know don’t even know my name. I’m not looking for fame, I just hope by my time here I can do enough to have a nice legacy, and proofs for the next generations I existed, I mattered, I was someone.

16 – Wild

For those who don't know me, I can get a bit crazy: I have to get my way twenty-four hours a day, 'cause I'm hot like that. Every guy, everywhere, just gives me mad attention, like I'm under inspection. I always get a ten, ‘cause I'm built like that. I go through guys like money flying out the hands. They try to change me, but they realize they can't. And every tomorrow is a day I never plan. If you're gonna be my man understand I can't be tamed. If there is a question about my intentions, I'll tell ya: I'm not here to sell ya, or tell you to go to hell – I’'m not a brat like that. I'm like a puzzle, but all of my pieces are jagged; if you can understand this, we can make some magic – I'm wrong like that. I wanna fly, I wanna drive, I wanna go, I wanna be a part of something I don't know, and if you try to hold me back I might explode. Baby, by now you should know I can't be tamed. Well I'm not a trick you play, I'm wired a different way; I'm not a mistake, I'm not a fake, it's set in my DNA. Don't change me: I can't be changed, I can't be tamed.

17 – Ornament

Makeup is not only embellishment, it’s also my way to build an armor I can go through life with: the most colorful I look, the most powerful I feel. And it would take me the same amount of energy to restrain myself by fear and shame as to be fully free and happy and my true self, so I prefer being myself sorry not sorry.

18 – Misfit

When I was younger I had hard times to fit in the society’s mold – still today. They said I was too small, to fragile, to fem, bla bla bla. As a kid I wanted to fit in, and I tried my best to be as they expected me to be. But today I don’t want to fit in, I don’t want anymore to be shaped as the way you want; I want to belong, no matter who I am, and mostly who I have the potential to be.

19 – Sling

You have the weapon. And this is your target. Just aim at them, and shoot. But be wise: you only have one chance.

20 – Tread

Just some airport memories: I’m back from the longest trip of my life and you’re waiting for me to take us home. I want to leave with you, but I have to get my luggage first. So I’m waiting too, we’re just standing there hand in hand, and the time goes so slowly we could fall asleep. But instead, we fall in love.

21 – Treasure

I’ve been sailing for many years to find you, but it was worthy and now I don’t want to ship away from you. I landed on the nice beach of your body, I caressed the sand of your skin, I tasted the salt of your foam, I listened to the echoes of your moans, I smelled that love was in the air. And I saw, I saw your beauty, and I still can see it when my eyes are closed and I dream to feel you against me. Shine bright like a diamond, shine bright like you.

22 – Ghost

We all know that story. Once upon a time there was this gorgeous person sending you a message. You talk, talk, talk, exchange secrets and hopes, make plans and promises. One day, you meet, and it’s one of the most fabulous day of your life, one you will remember for ages. You feel happy, fulfilled, confident for your future with them. But they is then nowhere to find, no more messages, no more secrets, no more plans, no more nothing. You are alone, haunted by all these brightest memories that now make you cry.

23 – Ancient

I think a lot about my grandma, how old she has become these last years, how sick, how less capable to live alone, and how alone. I know I should call her more often, I know I know I know; but I feel bad when I call, when she forgets her train of thoughts, when sometimes can’t even say my name. I remember these nights when she was dancing at the balls, when we used to play card games and domino, I still can hear her laugh. Why time had to run that fast?

24 – Dizzy

Weed, poppers, ecstasy, cocaine, or just this glass of wine before going to bed. I’d take anything to be just a little bit less myself. Sometimes I can’t stop hating who I was, hating who I am, hating who I could be but I’m not – I could change, but I’m lazy. Drugs are so much easier to take, they love my denial, they find home in my body, and I love them back for how they make me feel. I know I’ll cry tomorrow for each smile they offer me this night, but who cares of tomorrow?

25 – Tasty

You know I look good, but I taste ever better. My lips are always sugar-flavored, with this nice candy package hidden in my pockets. Sometimes I suck a lollipop, sometimes I chew a piece of flesh. Kiss me, lick me, bite me, and you’ll admit the sweetest truth: my name is not Flöra Délice for nothing.

26 – Dark

We all have a darker side and in our manichean world it’s in the darkness we can find the light, in the wrong we can learn to be right, after the lies we can accept the truth bla bla bla fuck you and fuck your binarity: embrace all the shades of yourself, open up to the nuances of humanity, deconstruct your black-and-white world where we’re all moving colors. There is no god or bad people, there are just people trying to do what they think it’s the best for the others or for themselves.

27 – Coat

A second skin up to my nails. A jacket I can put on whenever I want just because I can. The extra colors I need to feel myself.

28 – Ride

You’re like a roller-coaster: there’s some ups, there’s some downs, always moving and always fast; you make me worry before, you make me scream during, you make me breathless after; but I have to admit I always feel good adrenaline when I’m with you, and I lack your energy when you leave. In the end, it’s true what it’s said: the rush is worth the ride.

29 – Injured

Today my right leg is still hurting. Long story short I drank too much and danced more than usual – my body wasn’t ready. Nothing really bad I hope, but I’m still concerned as usual. I just hope I’ll be fine for Halloween, because missing a party because of a party is not my aesthetics. Not at all.

30 – Catch

Tomorrow, I’ll be yours and you’ll be mine. That’s all I’ll be saying, but how knows to how many people? I mean it’s gonna be the Halloween party, there’s gonna be a lot of monsters, and I’m gonna suck catch ‘em all!

31 – Ripe

Everything that starts has already ended.

The day has come. It is today that all rises to its end. The finish line, the last moments. Will we stay together tomorrow? I always wonder “what will be tomorrow? will it ever come?”, because I fear what’s coming, I fear these times of the year. But tomorrow is somewhere somewhere else, and it’s today that has to count, so let’s make the best it. Let’s be together.

[euria-stratos]

Updates: I’m not dead... but this blog might be soon

Hey... sorry for being inactive for nearly two months. A lot of important stuff have happened in my personal life recently that left me being more involved with them and having too little time online.

And also said events had an effect on my progression through inktober soo... sorry about that. I’ll try to finish the one for this year before new years to make up for lost time. However, I might not be able to post some of them soon until I can find a more stable platform to post them on. This goes for my written work (both past, current and future ones) as well, since some of them would delve into subjects that would soon be no longer allowed here. Which brings me to the next point I have to address.

As all of you have heard recently, Tumblr has changed their policy regarding adult content on this site and would soon delete vast amounts of posts and blogs that have them. While part of the reason behind this is for a good reason, it also hampers a bit on the creative freedom of some users here that make perfectly legal adult content (with filters on, and proper tagging).

Okay, so how does this relate to me and my blog here? Well, I made post here a few months ago, mentioning that some of my written work will be delving into darker themes, which include adult content and very sensitive topics.

This was followed by three poems I posted afterwards, two of which delved into the problem of sexual violence/exploitation while the other dealt with war crimes and the impending genocide of a people. Of course, I put nsfw tags on the a bit more explicit ones, while putting trigger warning tags on all. So far, these three poems are the only ones with clear adult content and themes that I have on this blog of mine. (As far as I am clearly aware of).

However, with this new policy on nsfw content, I don’t know if these three posts would be enough endanger the existence of this blog and my account as a whole or they would give me a bit more time to delete these posts.

So, to remedy this, I’ve been starting to record and save all of my works here, both written and drawn, offline, and starting to create accounts on other platforms (twitter/instagram) to move them there. I’ll be deleting the aforementioned poems soon, in a bid to stay in this site, though half of my works similar to it will be on another site. In the next few days, I’ll be posting links to these accounts where you can still find me and my other works, just in case I’ll be deleted off this site or my blogs be scrubbed clean of anything above PG.

On a hopeful note, I still have my deviantart account, though I have been inactive on it for a while, so please bear with me on getting all of my content placed there.

Anyway, that’s it for updates and news from me on my end. I’ll be honest, I found joy in this site when I decided to join it and have encountered lots of great things here. ‘Tis very tragic that having certain types of content would soon doom many of them, my own and yours included.

For my followers on this blog, thank you so much for your presence and support. It’s because of you that I continue to make and improve on my art (both visual and literary). Hopefully, this storm will soon come to pass and we’ll either continue to see each other here or find each other on other places on the web. Again, thank you for everything and peace out.

Sincerely,

euria-stratos

[caitlintobias]

31 days, 31 drawings - INKtober 2017

31 days, 31 drawings – INKtober 2017

Followers of my Flickr stream have seen my real life drawings in October, as I participated in the annual INKTober challenge. And it was more fun than I thought it would be when I started! No, I am not a great artist in real life, but I do love to draw and paint. Sadly the past years I seemed to have forgotten how much I love it, so one thing this challenge brought me was: bringing back the joy…