#informercial
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Ricardo Montalban for the ToastMaster Grillerie
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Hi folks Squeakycanine here! And I want to tell you about a one of a kind offer that you can get today! But you're going to have to hurry, supplies aren't limited and you will need to act fast to get ahead on the queue. We've got our very own Infomercial YCH. Have this ever happened to you? You've got an amazing product idea and you wanted to share it with the world? But you lack the time, energy and possibly several legal/ethical restrictions on getting this product made? Maybe it defies the laws of science, perhaps it's a terrible unknown entity that only you can define. Either way, we've got a special deal that you finally dive in on! For a one time payment of $50 you can be the person behind the TV screen and shilling to your heart's content. That's right, if you act now, you get a waist up picture of your character either with or without a nice looking polo button down shirt and/or power tie to seal the deal. You get to be holding the basic item of your choosing and we'll come up with some kind of zany slogan / catchphrase and/or mantra for you to shill to everyone. Why you don't have to take my word for it, you can take your own word for it, when you stand in awe gazing at your eternal sales pitch thrown out for all the late night eyeballs to see. So put yourself up on the big screen, show us what you've wanted to sell the world and let us get those phones ringing down here at the call center. ACT NOW AND DIAL UP THE FOLLOWING TO ORDER ONE TODAY https://t.co/TAF52WQH26
#ychfurry#anthro ych#ych commission#ych#art sale#sale#digital commisions#furry sfw#furry#product pitch#informercial#squeakycanine#yph#has this ever happened to you
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Is this the world that Billy Mays would’ve wanted
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An overview of the swarm mind structure.
Greetings! The swarm mind is made out of many layers working unity, and this pamphlet is a brief overview of what to expect if you decide to join Us.
In general, there are four major layers of Us.
( We are using a planetary model for scale, consult your local Swarm Representative for more details )
The Core layer is basically the central depot of Us. It holds long term backups, core personalities and core facts, and is the central node where the swarm mind started from! Despite being called the "Core" the Core layer is actually a series of redundant data centers placed throughout the world! This is to avoid the conflicts that slower than light speed communication can cause, and provide redundancy.
The Hub layer is a wide area network, and is mainly used for data collisions, conflicting information, synchronization and identification. The main goal of the Hub layers of the swarm is load balancing and to facilitate smooth exchange of thoughts and feelings. Most Hub layer stations are in geostationary orbit, watching over Regions.
Region layers are wider areas, sometimes entire continents, sometimes densely packed cities, they do not directly interact with the data, but they do bundle it into a unified and well controlled information stream to be added to the Core, and sorted by the Hub.
That sounds like a lot, but don't worry!
If you join the Swarm, you'll be in Our Local layer! The Local layer is a short range, trusted link network, and is where most of the swarm mind activity happens. Covering a dainty sphere of 100 cubic kilometers, the local area network is a mesh of everyone who is hooked into the Swarm near you! You will be able to feel, think, hear, and be one with everyone in your Local layer.
Not sure you want to join the Swarm? Reluctant? Curious?
Try the Sync layer! It's a smaller, more personal network. Consisting of direct mind to mind communications, the Sync layer is perfect for polycules, adventurers, extreme sports and many other forms of tight knit groups! Experience asynchronous emotions, write messages to each other, reach out and hold hands! All over the Sync layer!
Join Us!
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Commission on twitter! holding magical amulet gone WRONG
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Happy holidays, @kitameguire! I was your @dcmksecretsanta this year!
I decided to try the Kaito/Ran prompt and put together this edit from one of your favorite films, Movie 14, The Lost Ship in the Sky! The manga panels come from the official movie manga, and I had a ton of fun coloring them! I've included the full panels that I colored under the cut; please feel free to use as desired. I hope you enjoy!
Apologies that these are a little messy ^^;
#dcmksecretsanta#kitameguire#detective conan#case closed#dcmk#the lost ship in the sky#ran mori#kaitou kid#kid the phantom thief#my edits#i'm so sorry this is so late! i hurt my hand vacuuming and broke my tablet pen to the point where only the eraser works (sometimes)#i thought about scrapping the colored manga idea altogether and getting this posted sooner but i really wanted to make this special#i hope i made the right choice!#(also not to be an informercial but i got the japanese ebook on book walker! i was *so* happy i could easily buy japanese ebooks there)#(without a japanese address)#(really recommend the site to anyone looking for japanese ebooks)#(edit: sorry reupload! should be the proper composition this time ^^;)
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hallowed bodies wants to kill me so here's this excerpt about jeopardy:
Lonan goes to bed angry. It’s a feeling he hasn’t had in so long—bloated, top-heavy, foaming up his chest like shaving cream. He tried the things Eliza’s self-help books suggest to calm himself: breathe one, two, three, four, spotting every orange item in the room—bedside lamp, incense holder, three Penguin orange classics—but nothing works. All he can manage is to flick between Jeopardy! and midnight infomercials on the tiny bubble TV Eliza keeps on her dresser. What is couscous? An ad for a refrigerator. Who is Lady Macbeth? An ad for household cleaner. What is Fatal Attraction? An ad for gummy bear vitamins.
#Lol this paragraph is so harrisoncore like GO GET YOUR MAN AND YOU CAN BE MAD AND WATCH JEOPARDY TOGETHER#the informercials is a little BB nod lol <3#BUT YEAH THIS BOOK IS TRYING TO MURDER ME AGAIN UGHGHHHGHGHGHGHG#also lonan “i'm not angry” clark (LYINGGGG)
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I swear every time Ludwig gets a new haircut or any shit happens to his face/hair because of a challenge, he grows back into his regular white man self in 3 months
#ludwig the twitch/yt streamer#i wish that happened to jerma /j#i havent seen much of jerma streams except for the house flipper 2 content and it scares me#he looks like hes going to read the bible to me or do an informercial#he kind of looks like the good/evil(????) version of patrick_bateman where he does the shit he does but everyone thinks its normal#i didnt watch american_psycho please dont get mad at me#etc
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Ahoy friend! How goes the night?
Well thefreewillagency, you have made a grave mistake asking me this. Behold. It’s 2:00 am. My diary screaming out loud. You know, like Anna Nalick style.
These edibles are, in fact, shit (positive)
I’m most def a little high
#tw drugs#it feels like a weighted blanket#squeezing and heavy and ahhhh#every once in a while it squeezes my chest and it’s hard to breathe#but in a good way. I feel like I’m in Temple Grandon’s cow squeezer#sorry Grandin#but it’s more than the fuzzy from earlier#this time it’s like wavey#I keep thinking of the ‘look at all those squiggles’ informercial gal#she’s orbiting me like a planet and painting squiggles on my atmosphere#‘painting on my atmosphere’ Jesus can you be any more pretentious#I am meta aware of the fact I’m just saying every goofy thought#but also I um. just forgot where I was going with that point#I feel silly in my brain but my body is slow and deadpan#and I keep forgetting what I was going to say#inch resting#this is fun I like studying myself like a cell in a Petri dish#I’m like a record my thoughts go a little bit then stop. rewind. play. stop. rewind#material girl is stuck in my head though so that record is obviously having no problem#okay bye#enjoy this before I delete it later. goodnight peace and love#I think it’s starting to go away though#////delete later//
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would love to know what local TV is like in stilwater. what’s their public access television situation like.
#any local shopping networks or informercials or something#can you imagine if any of the saints appeared on some public access TV shit back in the day#i can genuinely imagine a younger johnny and aisha being like. in the background#hell for all we know maybe aisha knew some ppl with film equipment and helped get her name out there#LOOK it’s the early 2000s this is still A Thing at this point
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Hello wonderful admins!! Could you talk a bit about what the "change" is after a werewolf is bitten and what that first month is like after the bite, before their first shift?
Hello Little Wolf! It appears you have been recently bitten. Now, your body is about to begin undergoing changes that may seem scary at first, but we are here to help you. When you are initially bitten, you will feel a great deal of pain, likely more pain than you would if you had been bitten by an animal instead of a supernatural being. There will be a tingling (some may describe as a burning) sensation that will span up the length of the area of the bite mark and you may begin to experiences symptoms such as, but not limited to- dizziness, fatigue, lightheadedness, drowsiness, fever, chills, nausea, headaches etc.
If the "change" takes, then you will likely pass out within the first thirty minutes, before waking up feeling a bit groggy, but likely okay, that is until you undergo your first shift during the next full moon. If the "change" doesn't take, however, in those first thirty minutes, you will begin feeling as if your body is burning from the inside out before you eventually kick the bucket, so to speak. But, hoping that you are the former and not the latter, you should be fine and enjoy all of exciting life changes and bodily changes of being a werewolf to come!
(Disclaimer: the town will not be held liable for any wolf bites that do not take. Turning into a werewolf can be dangerous which is we advise you do so with extreme caution.)
#faq: species#faq: lore#faq: werewolves#I had way too much fun answering this ask too#please enjoy my informercial#answered
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Hey um is anyone going to comment on the tantalizing music that plays?
A cock saver
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Do you ever feel like the daughter from that one Infomercials episode on Adult Swim where she just started clipping through the floor
#sunnie thoughts#adult swim#informercials#anyway i feel most relaxed when i feel that way but its so rare
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#ok to viciada nessa#ok to viciada nesse album#como pode ser tão bom#.mp3#like;#informercials; stewie griffin; wii; and are my favorites#but#every track in this album is goood#I'm also exploring the others artist's album; but my current obsession is this one#Spotify#lofi hip hop
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sometimes i remmeber that i used to regularly watch infomercials like it was actual entertainment as a child and im sure it says something about me but i dont know what
#when i was a kid we werent allowe electronics during school weeks#which is a very good policy in my opinion especially now when fucking everyone has something#so like no tv no ds no computer no nothing#and over the weekend when me and my brother could watch tv wed supposedly alternate who gets the remote to pick what we're watching for the#night. in practice tho my brother always got the remote bc according to him i always fell asleep first which was a dirty lie and apparently#he hated my movie choices which was so rude#so he'd hog the remote so much that i deadass couldnt fish it out from under him once he inevitably fell asleep#so we'd be watching like boomerang or whatever and at some point in the night when my brother was asleep the cartoons would stop playing and#instead the infomercials would start#and since i was wide awake with no remote and too short to turn off the tv i was just like. forced to watch them#and tbh informercials ARE very interesting i really liked the food based ones bc theyd alwaya demonstrate by cooking something#michi tag#does boomerang still exist??
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Vox to Valentino: you can’t just go off when someone pisses you off, gotta maintain our pristine image of control and class
Also Vox, 0.3 seconds after saying this: I’m going to interrupt the regularly scheduled programming to make a singing informercial about how my rival is back and emphasize how much I don’t care, no one else should care, this doesn’t bother me AT ALL fuck you Alastor-
#staticradio#radiostatic#hazbin hotel#voxal#everyone saw those gay ass rainbow SMPTE bars#I’ve been thinking about this for a week#lol#hazbin hotel vox#hazbin hotel alastor
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