#incorrect marauder quotes

[loonylupinblack3]

Barty: you saved me. I owe you my life.

Evan: no thanks. I've seen it and i'm not very impressed

[seekmemystar]

James: so I say to her "water? I barely even know you."

Remus: stop talking to me like we're in the middle of a conversation, we just sat down.

[sawturncore]

Remus: Once James and Sirius had a fight that went like this

Sirius: “anything that comes out of your mouth is stupid!”

James: “Sirius.”

Remus: and to this day I still laugh out loud in inappropriate settings because I randomly think of it

[shadowbriar]

Regulus: "I love you."

Regulus: "With all my heart."

Regulus: "I'll give you all the crust to my pizzas."

James: "Aww, even the ones with cheese?"

Regulus: "Even the ones with cheese."

Regulus, to the camera: "I fucking hate pizza crust."

[delulu4marauders]

one day when the marauders get detention...

james: oh deer

sirius: dog gone it

peter: rats

remus: i was un - a - were that we had to face these consequences

*muffled giggling*

[love-slipped]

(after a fire in their dorm)

remus: is this what you want??? for me to identify your charred bodies through dental records?

james: SIRIUS DID IT

sirius: JAMES DID IT

peter: …we’re going to the dentist?

[jamesandthedog]

McGonagall on 1st of September: If there were any points to take, you two would’ve lost them all.

James: How about you give us both ten and then take five?

Sirius: Personally I think the confetti over there deserves at least twenty.

[darkacademicvibes]

1st year: Pink isn't puck rock!

Sirius, voice cracking: whAT?

Remus, placing book down slowly: Sirius, pink is the most puck rock thing you'll ever see

✨️3 hours later✨️

Sirius: you promise pink is that punk rock

Remus, rolling his eyes: on my love for you, I swear it

[messrsmoonysstar]

Marauders era characters in a Zombie apocalypse pt1

Remus:

-has plans

-has stock of foods and water

-probably the last one that will die

Sirius:

- will kill the zombies even if it's unecessary

- chaotic

- will survive

- has literally no plans

- would protect his friends without dying

James:

- would freak out at first

- partner in crime of Sirius

- has no plans

- would sacrifice himself to save his friends

- will find Lily

Peter:

- panicking the whole time

- scared but managed to kill some

- the first one that will die (I'm sorry 😭)

[faerycross]

sirius taking a "is my boyfriend autistic" quiz on his pc at the kitchen table and james making tea behind him like "yeah i took that yesterday. your brother is autistic by the way"

[loonylupinblack3]

James: why don't you have a boyfriend?

Regulus: I have strict parents. What about you?

James: you have strict parents.

[seekmemystar]

James, flirting: Are you into men? Asking for a friend ;))

Regulus, oblivious: Which friend? Remus? Yes, I'm into men.

[sawturncore]

Sirius: They locked us inside. Quick! Give me your credit card!!!

Remus: Here!

Sirius: *pockets it* James, kick down the door!

Remus: …

[shadowbriar]

Game of Who Am I

Sirius, having Freddie Mercury on his nametag: "Am I a blonde?"

James: "Nope."

Sirius: "Am I attractive?"

Remus: "Yes. I'd love to fuck the life out of you if I was given the permission."

Sirius: "No, I meant the name I have, not me, Remus."

James:

Peter:

Remus:

Lily:

Marlene:

Dorcas:

Mary:

Sirius: "And just so you know, you do have my permission."

Peter: "ANYWAYS-"

[percyweasleyapologist]

Remus: Fuck capitalism. It's a rigged system that keeps us poor and it isn't fair. You shouldn't need to work three jobs to afford basic necessities.

Remus, playing Monopoly: Sorry, if you wanted to win you should have tried not being poor.

[moondustinfj]

James: He hates me! Why does your uncle hate me Sirius??

Sirius: Oh...Because I told him you were the one who smoked pot in my room when I visited him in 5th year

James: WHAT??

Regulus *coming inside* : Hey, what's going on?

James: Sirius told Alphard that I smoked pot in Sirius' room in 5th year!

Regulus: What? Were you even there?

Sirius: ...I told him he flew out of the window

James: And why did he believe it?

Sirius: Because I told him what an excellent quidditch player you are :)

James: awwww :) you really-

Regulus: NO. Don't even start. Sirius, James and I are supposed to tell him that we live together TODAY and we can't do that if he hates James!

Sirius: Okay! Okay...I'll tell him.

(1 hour later)

Regulus: So. Did you tell him?

Sirius: Yeah about that. I was thinking of maybe writing him a letter-

Regulus: Okay you know what? You had your chance.

Regulus *goes up to Alphard*: Uncle. James didn't smoke pot in 5th year, Sirius did.

Sirius: YOU ARE SUCH A TATTLETALE!!

Alphard: Is this true Sirius?

Sirius: Yes..

Regulus: And uncle. Sirius was the one who melted your collection.

Sirius:

Sirius: REGULUS' ONLY FRIEND FOR YEARS WAS OUR HOUSE ELF

Regulus: *gasp*

Regulus: SIRIUS AND REMUS BROKE UP, GOT TOGETHER AND BROKE UP. AGAIN!

Sirius: REGULUS BECAME A DEATH EATER THEN WENT ON A SECRET MISSION TO FIND THE HORCRUXES. ON HIS OWN!

Regulus: SIRIUS IS GOING TO ASK REMUS TO MARRY HIM!

Remus: what

Sirius: YOU LITTLE- REGULUS AND JAMES ARE LIVING TOGETHER!!

Alphard: ....That is a lot of information to take in 30 seconds. I will have a word with both of you later. And James.

James:

Alphard: You have been Sirius' best friend for years, stuck by him through his drug problem

Sirius: Oh come on, it's not like he never-

Alphard: And now you've taken on Regulus as well. I don't know what to say. You're a wonderful human being.

James: Thank you, sir

Alphard: Please. Call me uncle.

James: Okay...uncle.

Remus:

Remus:

Remus: Okay so am I supposed to ignore the fact that-