#incoherent words but you guys will understand later on. the signs are here

[yi3248]

Thank you so much for the coffee! chibi roach playing rock paper scissors, and cowboy roach :>

[doudouneverte]

A family of three...and more

a/n: where are the Maya Lopez fics?

*not my GIF*

Pairing: Maya Lopez x Fem!reader

Summary: you propose to your girlfriend with something on your mind

Type: Fluff

warning: nothing

word count: 2551

note: bold=ASL, this take place before Hawkeye

------------

Maya put her phone back in her pocket while she was looking for cheese. A few minutes later, she was on her way to the cashier when two people blocked her way. They were visibly arguing, but she didn't have time for that. She just wanted to walk away, but one of them was blocking the way through the cashier.

Maya: I'm at the grocery store do you want anything?

You: just some cheese. i want to make pizza tonight

Maya: 👍

You: love you, i have to go now but i'll be home around 7pm

You: and please be careful on the road

Maya: like usual 🙄

Any other person would choose another cashier, but for her, it was not an option. Not for Maya, at least. It was the only member of staff who knew ASL and cared to communicate with her.

She sighed and decided to make another lap in the grocery store while the people finished what they were doing. Only two minutes later, she finally made her way to the cashier.

'Hello, Maya.' Sophie, the cashier said signed. Earning a smile from the other woman.

'Hello' Maya signed back. They 'talked' for a moment before your girlfriend needed to leave.

Maya took a detour home before she had to return to work. At work, things seemed better than at the grocery store, but even there, people seemed to argue about something she didn't care about. But even like that, two of her men caught her attention. The way their hands were moving made her look at them, even if she knew that neither of them used ASL.

It's something she has developed since she started falling for you. Every time you were rambling (even if you knew she couldn't hear you), your hands moved frenetically. At first, Maya found it disturbing because she really wanted to understand what you were signing, but your movements were incoherent. But as time passed, she started to like it because it was like your body was trying to tell her a story that you were completely unaware of.

"Guys, what are you doing here?" Kazi asked, making the two men stop.

"We were trying to know what we should order between sushi and tacos." One of them said making the man roll his eyes.

"And we thought that we should ask the boss because she's responsible here." the other man said.

"Does it seem that she's listening to you?" Kazi asked, and the three looked to Maya, who was smiling on her phone.

Maya was pouting before Kazi caught her attention. 'Are you okay?' she nodded. 'Do you want sushi or tacos?'

You: i'm bored right now

Maya: and what should i do?

You: i don't know i just want to be with you right now

You: do you think about me?

Maya: i always think about you 🙄

You: ther's a customer i need go

Maya: okay i love you

You: me too 😍

'Whatever' she brushed it off.

The rest of her day was like usual, except that you didn't text her frequently. Back at home, the boss of the tracksuit mafia was trying to distract herself while she was waiting for you. Fortunately, she didn't have to wait too long before the front door opened.

You: I'm home

Sensing her phone vibrating next to her, she looked at the text before rushing to the front door. You were getting rid of your shoes when you felt two arms wrap around you. Maya pushed her head on your shoulder, and you could feel her smile. She didn't waste time before spinning you and landing small pecks on your face.

'Hello'

'I missed you' You rolled your eyes at your girlfriend but smiled again.

Maya always acted differently when you were home, she switched from her bossy personality to a more bubbly one (even if she didn't like when you told her that the first time). She was a little clingy, but always there to help you with anything.

'How was your day?' She followed you into the kitchen.

'Cool' she nodded and laid against the counter while you were starting to make dinner. Maya stayed there on her phone, checking that everything was okay, before you caught her attention.

Your hands were shaking a little, and your throat was a little sore, but you gathered your courage and started to sign.

'You. Me. Marriage? Her eyes get wide open, and her mouth opened and closed a few times without sound. She was visibly stunned.

'What?'

"I know that we didn't talk about it, but I thought about it, and also today at work, I…" You were rambling and started to pace in front of your girlfriend while your hands were trying to translate everything.

After a few seconds and with your lungs almost totally empty, you looked at Maya, who was lost in her thoughts. Her eyes were on you like usual, but you knew that she was not there.

"Maya?" You signed while you shot her name. She didn't respond, so you placed your hand on her cheek, drifting her back into reality. 'Are you okay?'

'Wait.' She laid a hand on your shoulder and looked at you. 'Can you repeat, please?'

'I want to marry you' It was not the first time you talked about marriage and stuff, but now it was different. She could feel that. Your eyes were not leaving hers; you were shy but fully determined, and despite your scared/stressed expression, she could see the little spark in your eyes and the anticipation in your gaze.

'Are you proposing?'

'Well. Yes, but I don't have a ring. At least not yet.'

'Then find one and I'll give you my answer.' she replied with a cocky smile.

Later that night, you were lying on your bed watching a movie (with subtitles) when Maya thought about something. She slapped your arm a few times to gain your attention, making you look at her a little confused.

'Can I ask you why you proposed? I love you, and you love me, but we both know that's not the only reason.' You sighed and took a moment to decide if you should tell her the truth, but you really want to marry her, and you don't want to start your new life on a lie.

'Okay, it's a little long. Let me write it to you.'

~~~~

The previous week

It was a Tuesday like any other; you were at work in your library. It was the moment of your week when you would close earlier because you made a deal with an orphanage in the city, which made you spend an afternoon reading books to the children.

However, this day you noticed a new addition in the little orphan's library. A baby girl, she was only two months old, and she focused her attention on the children and the people who were surrounding her.

When you started to read, her eyes almost immediately searched for the origin of the new voice, and she giggled a little when she saw you. Hearing that, you raised your eyes to the infant to see her beaming a toothless smile at you.

It was not a surprise that you wanted kids at some point in your life, and Maya was aware of that. You talked a lot about that, even though you knew she was a little unsure if she was able to raise a child properly.

Your wish for a kid was one of the reasons that you spent every Tuesday afternoon reading books to those children. The other one, was that you were also an orphan after losing your parents when the Avengers fought Ultron in Sokovia.

Before leaving, you asked for more information about the baby. You learned that her name was Zoe. Her mother died in a car accident, and her father gave up every rights on her a week after his wife's death.

You came back on Saturday to spend more time with the children while your girlfriend was doing her usual missions. Then you asked if there was a chance for you to adopt Zoe. Nina, a woman working there, told you that she would need to talk to the caregiver about that, and she would organize a meet-up with them for your next visit.

Earlier that day.

After reading the last book of the day, you had your meeting with the caregiver. You prepared a solid file over the weekend and were a little nervous when they consulted it.

After they rode that, they told you that every member of the orphanage talked good about you and about how your reading time was the favorite moment of the kids in the week. The only thing that they were a little reserved about was your situation.

"Listen, Ms. Y/l/n, I'm sure that you would be one of the best people to adopt the little Zoe; you seem to be a really good person, and I'm sure you will be a good mother. But unfortunately, I'm not the one who can approve that alone. We will need to send your request to the children's court. They will examine your files again, and if anything seems alright, that will send a representative to check everything." You nodded while mentally noting every piece of information.

"And I don't think it will change a thing, but I know that they usually tend to be more relaxed when it's a married couple who makes the request." They explained.

"Well, you mean that there is a chance that they won't validate my request if I'm not married?"

"Honestly, there is a chance that they will refuse your request even if you're married, but I know that it helped some people. But of course I don't want to force anything."

"No it's okay. Thank you for letting me know. I'll try my best to make them accept that. See you next week." You said before leaving the office.

~~~~

'I see' Maya signed before opening her arms to give you a hug.

'But you don't have to accept if you don't want to have a child.' You said after you pulled away.

'No, I want that. Yes, I found it a little surprising to potentially be mom right now, but yeah, I want that with you.' Her statement eased your mind, but it also reminded you of the little age gap between you. Of course, it's not a big one, but it's just enough to have different visions of things sometimes. 'Do you think we have time to organize everything before they actually send your file? Because I want to marry you before that.'

You gave a big smile and crashed your lips against hers. The rest of the night was filled with…intimate moments, and Maya definitely deserved that.

After a talk with your friends and the tracksuit mafia, you decided to get married only two months later, so you could have time to organize everything. Much to your surprise, Maya was very implied in that. It was not uncommon for you to come back with a sleepy Maya on some wedding dress catalogs.

The D-day was perfect. Not having a lot of family members you were close with made this more 'easier'. Your best friend Julia was the one who escorted you to the altar, while Maya was escorted by Wilson Fisk. With Kazi as a priest (which, by the way, doesn't really fit him very well), things couldn't be better. You exchanged vows, you kissed, and you cried, which made your newlywed wife cry too.

Two weeks later, you were back from your honeymoon, and you brought Maya with you to the orphanage the next Tuesday afternoon. The boss of the mafia spent all her time with Zoe after she met her. Something that didn't go unnoticed by the director.

After a moment, they invited you two into their office to announce to you that the judge had accepted your request, and now the next step was to prove to whoever they'd send to you that you could be the best parents for her.

The date was given a few days later; you'd meet them in the next two weeks, which gave you just enough time to finish the nursery room with the help of Maya and the whole tracksuit. Some of them gave you some furniture their kids didn't use anymore; some even gave you a book about 'how to raise a child for the noobs' that made you laugh, but not your wife.

With the time this group became a second family to you, they always had your wife back and made sure that she didn't overwork and always came back safe in your arms. You liked them, and it was reciprocal; they called you the boss' wife, or Mrs. Lopez, even before you and May talked about plans for the future.

So when they learned that you were about to potentially become a mom, they helped you move all the stuff for the nursery and hide almost all the guns in the process.

When Maria, who worked for the child protection services, finally met you and Maya, it was like everything finally became real.

It took three visits from Maria and almost six months before you reached your last steps. A trial with the judge.

Of course, being the man he is, Wilson tried to pay the judge, but you convinced him to give up. If you couldn't convince them to let you two adopt Zoe, then maybe you didn't deserve to be a mom.

It's needless to say that the D-day you were more than stressed. You had this bad feeling in your stomach—a feeling that you tried to push away by making out with Maya in the car before steeping in the court. Despite her surprise, your wife didn't push you and complied with the kisses until you were ready.

The whole trial was like a big mission for Maya, a mission that she knew she couldn't miss because it was for your both happiness. But you were not alone there. There was the gang, Wilson, the kids, and the staff of the orphanage. Everyone was there to support you, which helped ease your mind.

Five hours. It took you five hours before the judge could give you their verdict. And the entire court exploded with cheer when they announced that they had accepted your request and that you would finally be officially the little Zoe's parents.

Back at home with your now-eighty-month-old daughter, nothing could match the joy and excitement you both felt.

'It's finally over' Maya signed before crashing on the couch.

"Yeah, finally," you repeated. You watched as Zoe yawned, visibly tired of the previous. Seeing this, your wife took her from your hand and headed to the nursery, but before she could let her on the crib, you grabbed the end of her shirt, making her look at you a little confused.

'Let her sleep in the bed with us just today.' You signed and pouted to try to convict her.

Maya just smiled and nodded.

You ended up taking a nap with your new daughter between you and Maya. You both had a wide smile, and you preyed that thing could stay like that forever.

[miekasa]

love talk

+ pairings: eren yeager + (fem) reader

+ genres and warnings: it’s not important that eren is a tattoo artist i just wanted to share bc i gave him tattoos here :’), fluff i think, smut/nsfw content, if you see a hint of eremin then no you don’t </2

+ word count: almost 2k, sickening innit luv

+ notes: yeah, still thinking about eren speaking german during sex bc he’s losing his mind hehe. i suppose this is the… softer version. might post another one later, who knows. and yes, i did almost name this pussy talk. 

Unbeknownst to him, Eren Jaeger speaks three languages.

The first two are obvious, but English is his preferred language; the one you’ll find him speaking most often. It only makes sense, seeing as it’s what the overwhelming majority of people, media, and signs spew at him.

The second is more reserved; something you might assume given his name, but not know for sure unless you asked, or stuck around long enough to catch him rambling excitedly to Armin in German, with broken slang phrases of English interspersed. It’s fascinating—cute, moreover—the way he stumbles back and forth between both tongues; and the difference in tone between them. You’re not sure if your own bias is peeking through, but you’re certain Eren and Armin both sound a little… meaner in German; more sarcastic, at the very least—and you wouldn’t be surprised to find out they were talking shit the whole time.

Though, there is a special, reserved intonation to his mother tongue that shows itself when Eren’s around you. It doesn’t seem to be by choice—gone beyond comprehension that he’s forced to revert to grunted expressions and curses in a language foreign to his surroundings. You assume them to be curses; you never can confirm, and Eren seems to not even be aware of his switching in the heat of the moment, can never quite recall what he was saying to you.

There are times when he’s reduced to mere sounds, no comprehensible words between the hundreds of thousands he knows—only guttural moans, and breathy sighs, and he seems to not even be able to understand himself. You have to admit, it’s a bit of an ego boost to be able to fuck your boyfriend stupid in two languages.

And at first glance, Eren doesn’t seem like the type of guy to know about anything outside of himself. He doesn’t seem like the full-sleeve, three ear piercing, tattoo artist kinda kid; but Eren Jaeger speaks the language of pictures, of symbols, of images, that he is able to decipher and give meaning to upon creation. He’s got a penchant for art, and a vision bigger than himself, so it’s only right that he takes his knowledge and applies it in its most permanent form. The tattoos are more than a hobby for him—they’re an extension of himself, his art, his language; and his body is the only canvas fit enough to capture them.

So, here, with Eren laying on his back, chest exposed, arms bent for his hands to rest against your waist, you get to see the culmination of all the words and all the pictures, from all the languages he’s deemed important enough to find a place on his skin.

“Do all of your tattoos have a meaning?” you question, reaching your hand up to trace over the delicate waves that ride along his right collarbone.

“No,” Eren winces when you move—just enough of him to feel an ounce of friction inside of you, but not enough to give him what he wants. He wiggles himself a bit, desperate for something, “Not at all.”

It makes you chuckle, with a sort of disbelief, at both his words and his actions, “You get things tattooed on your body that don’t mean anything to you?”

Eren lets out a shaky breath, followed with a boyish smile. He blinks at you slowly, lids fluttering and hands gripping tightly at your body, “Learned that not everything has to have a deep meaning to want to keep it around,” he tells you, right palm moving to venture over your tummy, and up your sides, “Somethings you just love.”

You don’t miss the lilt in his voice on the word ‘love,’ but you play it off, rolling your eyes at his deliberately sweet affections, and then, gently, your hips, “Pretty poetic for something with no meaning.”

“Yeah, well, Armin taught me that,” Eren grits, hands fastening themselves at your hips again.

“You talk about Armin a lot when we’re in bed you know,” you taunt him, moving your fingers to trace over more of the tattoos that litter his right shoulder, “Something I should know about?”

Eren shivers at the feeling—of your fingertips on his skin, and what he swears was an intentional clench around him, “You don’t seem to mind.”

You smile at him, enjoying the contortions of his face when you run your hands down his chest, palms pressed lightly against his pelvic bone. Eren bends a knee, but does he best to remain still, and you can’t help but to chuckle. He looks pretty when he’s trying his best.

“I’m greedy,” you tell him, raising your hips, and pausing in your words as you slowly lower yourself back on to him.

“Trust me,” Eren scoffs, a façade to cover up his reddening cheeks and shaky thighs, “I know.”

He tries to move his hips up, desperate for something more; for you to fucking move, but, you keep your hips perfectly still. Instead, you reach your arms behind you, and onto Eren’s thighs, cementing them to the bed. He groans, his hands sliding down to your own thighs, fingertips digging into your flesh.

“And you called me greedy,” you huff, amused, as Eren rolls his eyes beneath you. When you’re sure he’s not going to move, you bring your arms back around, palms splayed on his stomach, “Relax. This is what you asked for, isn’t it?”

“Honestly, in an ideal world, this would be happening when I was playing COD, not when I was already impossibly hard with morning wood. And with a lot less teasing on your part.”

You have to laugh—genuinely giggle—at Eren’s blunt honesty. He’s unintentionally charming; another linguistic skill he seems unaware that he’s proficient in. You can tell he doesn’t understand the source of your amusement, but the look in his eyes, the twinkle in his irises lets you know he’s too far gone to even care.

“Call it a lesson in self-control,” you say, moving your hands to his sides in time with a shallow grind of your hips, “Besides, I’m admiring you.”

Eren keeps his hands anchored on your thighs, shivering at sensitivity of his dick coupled with your hands stroking over his pecs, “Lesson fucking learning—babe, fuck, please—”

“Shh—not yet,” you coo, and reach to pull his arms off of you, leaving you with room to admire his sleeve. You take pity on him, holding his right wrist with both of your hands, before slowly beginning to bounce on him.

Eren squirms, his free hand reaching to grab at the flesh of your ass, eyes blinking open to watch his cock be buried inside of you. The relief is instant—for the both of you—immediate groans and shallow profanities slipping past your lips as you build a steady pace to ride him.

“Tell—tell me what this one means,” you question slowly, keeping your right hand around his wrist, but using your left to point to the tattoo; a stylized line art of crossed wings.

“Some shit about freedom,” Eren grunts, fingers twitching, “Fuck, babe—more, please, I’ll—”

Eren cuts himself off with a whine, and you hiss yourself, lifting your body all the way to the tip, before lowering yourself again at an agonizingly slow pace. At this rate, you can feel everything; every vein on his shaft, every twitch of his cock. You feel Eren deep inside of you, even see where the bulge outlines your tummy.

You still yourself for just a second, catching your breath, anchoring yourself on Eren. You’re pretty far gone yourself, but you want more; for yourself, and for him. You do your best to stay coherent, slowly grinding atop of him, questioning him about another tattoo on his arm, ignoring the way his palm grips at your bicep. It’s a small one, with detailed Japanese characters that you can’t understand, but appreciate anyway; it’s one of your favorites, and you ask Eren about its meaning, clenching yourself around him as punctuation to your question.  

Eren sucks air between his teeth, left hand pulling back to run his fingers through his hair, a grunted word in German falling from his lips. You smirk, but let him try to answer you.

“I don’t fucken’ know,” Eren grumbles, head thrashing from side to side, “It’s really fucken’ hard to remember anything—shit—like this. S’fucking torture.”

“Hm,” you hum, not satisfied; eager for more of Eren’s love language, “Tell me something in German, instead, then.”

But Eren can only babble beneath you; sounds incoherent in either language—reduced to desperate whines and grabby hands at your thighs, waist, boobs—anything. You lean forward, letting go of Eren’s tattooed wrist, and reaching to ghost your fingers over his lips.

“Come on, Eren, you’re usually so good at it when we do this,” you taunt him, words coated in sweetness that distract you from keeping up your pace, “Just want you to talk pretty to me. Tell me something, baby.”

Eren’s eyes travel from your fingertips, up your arm, neck, and to your face. When he meets your gaze something shifts; eyes heavy with want, and bitter with dissatisfaction.

So, he reaches for your extended hand, laces your fingers together, “Something like what?”

You wrap your fingers around his, then do the same with your left hand, “Anything.”

“Anything?”

“Yeah,” you affirm with a smile, finally satisfied.

Eren grunts, bending his right knee for leverage before he flips you over, hands still intertwined, but now pinned over your head, harshly pressed into the pillows below. He buries his head into the crook of your neck; licking a stripe along your collarbone, where you’d teased him minutes before. Then up, up, up, your neck to the shell of your ear, retreating downwards to suck on the skin just beneath your ear, nipping with pointed teeth.

Eren keeps his weight on you, the length of his cock sliding over your slick folds while he bites angry, red blotches into your skin—a kind of impermanent tattoo of his own making on your body. The friction is good, but not enough, and you wonder if Eren intends on teasing you as long as you’d done to him; but, he breathes heavy breaths up your neck again, before mumbling a series of foreign syllables into your ear.

He hovers over your face, satisfied by the daze in your eyes; the slight openness of your mouth. It’s you who looks dumbstruck now, a foreigner to his ministrations; and for once, he’s in control with his second tongue.

“What—what does that mean?” you finally ask, squeezing your eyes briefly when Eren teases the tip just past your entrance.

Eren chuckles, airy, gritty, and cocky all at once. He pushes his cock inside of you, balls deep, only to pull out almost all the way, before leaning forward just slightly, so that his bottom lip grazes over yours.

“It means I love you,” he whispers, hips bucking forward, “Try to remember that, ‘cause I swear I’m gonna fuck you stupid, baby.”

[kainscape]

Slashers with an S/O who talks in their sleep

@chibizombiebehindyou: Could you do the slashers (including Asa and Jesse) with a reader who talks in their sleep?

A/N: Decided to do this in a short prompt type of writing piece so I can practice writing short stories without going way overboard

A/N: okay maybe it’s not as short as I thought but hey, it’s not over 2 pages- yeah no it’s pretty lengthy 💀 and it’s not proofread ‼️

Bo Sinclair

It was a consuming and bone-breaking job that the Sinclair brothers did. Therefore, sleep was never guaranteed. But, with you? You decided on your own that you would keep yourself awake to see Bo come home in one piece. He always brushed your worry off as your so called obsession with him. After a few times of butchering your sleep schedule, it wasn't long before you were fast asleep when Bo retuned home. He made his way up the stairs, shedding his boots at the top. Discarding his mechanic coveralls, he was left in a stained but washed grey t shirt and his boxers. He had heard some quiet mumbling but didn't really look into it. The noise had vanished as he pulled back some of the old cover, slowly resting his body beside you. You had looked dead asleep, your body contracting slow and steady breaths. Exempt your mouth moving and forming words. He smirked, realizing you were taking in your sleep. He had some assumptions about it when you would ask questions with no reasoning. He wasn’t too worried. He propped himself up on his elbow to look over at you. “What do you mean you didn’t see it?! It was as big as your ass dude!” That’s something he’s never heard before. He couldn’t help but genuinely laugh at your behavior, shaking his head until he heard his name. “Well, Bo, what else do you want me compare it to, your dick!? Yeah right.” His face deadpanned, furrowing his eyebrows. He scoffed, turning over dramatically as he rolled his eyes. He faced away from you, biting the inside of his cheek. In the morning, he might tease you or ask questions around what you said. Either way, he’s not bothered by it.

Vincent Sinclair

It had been a long day for the boys and you within Ambrose. What a better way to go to sleep cuddled up together and arise later in the day by Bo? Of course, you were always first within the bed, already dead asleep and dreaming of whatever your mind wander to. Vincent kept awareness of where the creeks were in the floorboards, avoiding them so he could peacefully lay in bed next to your sleeping form. Yet he heard some prominent mumbling coming from you, serving closer and gently easing up the blankets to slip in. He had removed his mask already, carefully turning to face you. You had your arm over your eyes, mouth open and moving from incoherent sentences. But one was clear as day, “I’m convinced Vincent uses Gucci conditioner and shampoo, my god.” You mumbled a few after that but he was utterly confused. Why were you talking about that weird brand you had showed him once, and why did it correlate to your dream?? He shook his head gently, scooting closer and resting his arm across your waist/stomach, pulling himself against your form until he fell asleep to your rhythmic breathing. Sometimes, he’s entertained by your night time conversations.

Lester Sinclair

Your boyfriend had a fairly easy job compared to his brothers, but when there were visitors piling up after one another, it took a whole lot longer to come back home to you and your shared bed. The frogs and cicadas were a whole lot louder than usuals, but it was like a lullaby to you by now. Which queues the small mumbling escaping your mouth. He was quiet when he came, but of course, Lester wasn’t the best at silence. Luckily you were to lost in your dream to realize he was already snuggling in beside you. He had took notice of your nonsense sentences from time to time, not that it bothered him. If anything, it was an entertaining thing to listen to before going to sleep. It gave him a sense of what your brain really thinks of. “Lester… if I dressed up as roadkill… would you pick me up too?” He tried so damn hard to stifle his laugh, his body almost shaking as you formed a stupid grin on your face. Lester took in a deep breath, biting the inside of his cheek as he buried his head into the side of your neck. “Sure, hun’” he was sure to keep his words to a hush, taking note to your shared silence. There was a comfortable coldness that covered your bodies compared to the blistering heat outside. What a way to end the day.

Will Graham

Go to work, panic, panic some more and get no sleep. This was Wills routine even with you trying to hassle him into bed. He was always focused on something, or just simply to stubborn to let himself rest for once. But tonight, he had one hell of an excuse. Jack had kept him for a lot longer than both of you would like. But you knew what you signed up for when you accepted to go on a date with Will. You figured out after multiple nights of fruitless attempts at staying up and waiting for your boyfriend, you just gave in and went to sleep on your own terms. This gave Will the opportunity to overthink in peace without the guilt of making you worry. The job had took a huge toll on his physical capacity, leading him to shrugging off his clothing while he made his way to the side of the bed. He rubbed his eye, yawning as he lifted the blanket to the new queen bed you guys had bought, giving more room for dogs and the two of you. He stopped his motions, watching closely as you turned your body towards him. You were mouthing words but they were quiet and blotched. Will slowly slid underneath the covers, feeling his body sink in the end to a relaxed position. He had took not of your sleep talking, not bothered by it. To be honest, he likes to hear what you would say when you weren’t conscious of it. “I wish we had one of those stress powered lightbulbs…” A very quiet and short chuckle made its way out of you, “of course it’s for you, you could probably power Russia with how much stress you have.” And with that, he scoffed and turned the other way, mumbling to himself before attempting to sleep.

Jason Voorhees

Jason always makes sure you’re getting enough rest for your health. He’s adamant about you being your best self with a healthy body and mind. But, he’s never really surprised to see you up waiting for him time to time, honestly he can’t complain. He loves seeing you there in the cabin with the fire still going as you greet him with that beautiful smile. It’s truly warming for him. The rest of the nights, you’re always in the dark comfort of your shared room, resting atop the creaking bed and under the quilt blankets. The cabin door whipped open, quickly caught by the giant hand wrestling against the harsh winter wind. He tried his best to quietly close the door, pushing the lock in place he had added after a break in from a trespasser happened. He observed the room, laying his machete within the kitchen sink after shedding his jacket and laying it on the chair around the wood table. Expertly avoiding the creaks in the floor, he gently pushed open the bedroom door, slipping in without a sound. There was a severely dim light coming from the window, which shadowed over your face just right so he could see you. Jason had took off his boots while he listening to the common small talk from your sleeping form. You guys had decided to look in all the cabins, landing on the jackpot of a bigger bed so you could have more room. Therefore, it wasn’t a huge hassle for Jason to slip into the bed without the alarm of waking you. You were turned away from him, slow breaths from to body. The hockey mask laid on the dusty end table, facing up as Jason looked down at you. A small smile formed on his lips, listening as your talking grew a little more coherent. “Come on Jason, you got all that cake.. and you’re not gonna give me none?” His smile slowly faded, realizing what you meant by ‘cake.’ It ha mentioned before, especially when you went out of your way to slap his ass and look him in eyes to say, “a whole damn bakery back there..” Jason took it on himself to get used to it, not bothered by the comments. He shook his head, inching down so he could pull you closer to his chest, a very strong arm wrapped around you.

Michael Myers

There’s never a sleep schedule with the two of you. There’s times where Michael is out for days at time, retuning only when your asleep and unknowing. There are those very rare times like this one where you’re aware of Michaels presence in the bed while you drift of into sleep. He’s definitely not the type to pull you close or make a move to hold you, but he’s not going to push you away if you wrap yourself around him. Which is where you lay on his chest, listening to his eternally calmed heart beat as you knocked out. It had took a damn long time, but you achieved the privilege of seeing Michael without the infamous mask you grew accustomed too. His eyes usually zeroed in on the ceiling, waiting until he need to close his eyes came. But this time, he looked down at you shifting a bit in his chest, a few words spoken. “I really don’t know how people can’t smell you form your hiding places.. I can literally smell you before you walk in a room.. it’s not a good thing either.” His eyebrows furrowed together, trying to understand why you were composing about how he.. smelled. Yet here you are, your face completely shoved into his chest. He gave you an unimpressed eye roll, turning his head on the pillow for an attempt at some sleep. He found it rather amusing that you would speak whatever you thought without restrictions when you would sleep talk. Something to quietly tease you about.

Jesse Cromeans

He had already experienced your sleep taking, the cameras in his house capturing anything you did. Sometimes you asked questions or said random comments, all that made Jesse smirk or silently laugh. He had also taken notice to the earlier times you went to bed, your stubborn idea to stay up and wait for him dying down. He didn’t mind this, satisfied with your healthy sleep schedule returning. He set the tapes in a box for tomorrow’s checking. Jesse eased open the bedroom door, a small ray of light traveling across the room to reveal the bed you laid in. The black silk sheets covering your sound figure. He pushed the door back closed, taking off all his work attire to be left in his boxers and undershirt. He shimmied underneath the covers, slowly scooting closer to your body. Of course, there were some unconscious words to be shared. “I just realized I’ve got to sleep in every room…” there was some silence before you spoke again, “why?… look don’t even worry about.” There was humorous tone in the last sentence, one that felt oddly genuine for someone asleep. He shook his head, smiling while he took in your scent that comforted him. His hands caressed any exposed skin as the room fell silent, including his mind as you both shared a deep sleep.

Asa Emory

It wasn’t something he really cared to take notice about, never really sleeping at the same time as you due to his large amounts of work he took on. It was to the point he would drift off into a dreamless sleep on his desk. Not that you could really do anything about it with his stubborn view point, so you kept to yourself and went to your bed without him. Well, went to bed also meant brining a pillow and blanket down to Asas work place and sleeping the the chair. You just wanted to feel your boyfriends presence before you fell asleep. He only looked up for a few before looking back down at the scatter of papers, shuffling though some before writing. You made yourself as comfortable as you could get, sighing as you let your body relax. The sleep came easier than expected, the few sniffles sounding in the room letting you know Asa was still there. It was oddly comforting. A flash of worry did strike you, the worry that your sleep talking would annoy him, causing you to have to leave. But it was worth the few bits of it. Asa sighed, running his hand down his face as he battled the tired feeling back. Lending back in his seat, he crossed his arms while looking up to you in the leather chair. Without a warning, a question was asked out loud from you, “What color box would I get if I was one of your butterflies?” He tilted his head, furrowing his eyebrows before humoring himself by answering, “Red. To match the original one.” It seems like your dream had answered for you, the words quiet on your tongue as your chest arose slowly. Asa took in another breath before rising to his feet, walking over to you. He brought a hand up to your resting face, his thumb brushing your drink. What a beautiful butterfly you would be.

[alwaysmarveling]

Balloons

Pairing: Natasha Romanoff x reader

Warnings: cursing, arguing, and Clint (since he seems to be a sensitive topic for some of you)

Word Count: 3.6k

Summary: Natasha surprises you with balloons. What do you get for her in return?

A/N: It can get a little confusing, so just for clarification, a single dash (-) indicates a flashback, and three dashes (---) means a skip forward in time. Also, this takes place during the Snap.

“Hey, I’ll be back in a couple of days, okay?” Natasha barely looked up from her computer screen, but she heard your murmurs, going so far as to lean into your touch as you pressed a gentle kiss to the top of her head.

If you didn’t love her, you would’ve scrunched your nose, judged her for what must’ve been days without taking a shower. Instead, your brow furrowed slightly as you leaned over her, allowing your arms to drape over her torso, your hands clasping together at the center of her chest.

“Take care of yourself, okay? No more peanut butter sandwiches.” That elicited a groan from your wife. Her eyes remained on the monitor in front of her, but she still sunk into your embrace, her body almost on autopilot once she felt the familiar contact. “Promise me, Nat. I’ve left enough meals for the next two weeks in the fridge. All you have to do is microwave them.” A low sound left her mouth—maybe it was an “okay” or an “alright,” you really couldn’t tell—but you knew that was all you were getting from her at the moment. So, with a sigh, you brushed a quick kiss to her cheek and pushed yourself to stand straight.

“I love you, Nat.” It was only then that she turned around, finally allowing you to see the sparkle in her eyes that, more so now than ever, she reserved only for you.

“I love you too, malysh. Be safe. And call me if you need anything.”

“So you’re saying I can call and ask for you?” The redhead chuckled, leaning out of her chair to grab you by the hands. Once you were standing in between her legs, one of her hands trailed up to your cheek before pulling you down to kiss her.

“Anytime, malyshka, anytime,” she murmured, her lips brushing against yours as she spoke.

“I’ll be back as soon as I can, yeah?” Natasha nodded at you. The last thing you saw as you walked out the door was her characteristic smirk, the sly wave of her slender fingers, and the way her body was slumped against the chair, another sign that betrayed just how long she had gone without sleep. You had to succeed at this, for her.

---

It was pouring when you found him. You don’t think you would’ve seen him if it weren’t for the neon signs, their reflections against the growing number of puddles lighting up the street. But you didn’t need to see him to find him; the yelling and clashing of swords were enough to tell you where he was.

“What are you doing here?” His voice was gruff. It was clear he didn’t want to see you.

“I’m here to bring someone back.” He had yet to turn around, and yet you could still hear him scoff despite his turned back and the patter of rain.

“Then keep looking.” You rolled your eyes before clearing your throat and straightening up. Maybe he wouldn’t be able to see your growing assertion, but you’d make sure he heard it.

“I’m here to bring you back.”

“Don’t you have a wife to be getting back to?” You almost flinched at his words.

“How funny, I wasn’t sure if you even knew we got married.” Yes, Clint was your friend, but you didn’t forget the way Nat’s eyes shined with hurt when she looked in the crowd at her wedding and noticed that her best friend wasn’t there. It was just another thing that made her doubt what she was doing, wonder if she was a monster for moving on while everyone else suffered. You almost lost her that day, having to get Steve to pause the ceremony as you took her off to the side, desperate to make her stay.

-

“Nat, every day I wake up I think of all the people that we lost, just like that. But you’re still here, and I can’t lose you too. And if wanting to hold onto the one good thing I have left in the world makes me a monster, then-” She had pulled you close, kissed you through the tears that ran down her cheeks.

“You could never be a monster, my love.” Your foreheads pressed together as she whispered, allowing you to see the crystal droplets, physical evidence of the internal struggle she felt every day.

“And neither can you. Marry me?” She simply nodded, and you thought you couldn’t have been happier, more relieved.

But she proved you wrong only minutes later when she read her vows out to you, her eyes only leaving the crumpled paper to look at you, to make sure you were still there, as she tried to make her true feelings known. Her voice was nothing more than a whisper—you were sure you were the only one who could hear her, but that was more than okay with you—as she told you, “You told me I’m the only good thing you have left in the world, but you are my world. If I lose you, I’ve lost the world. It doesn’t matter how many other planets there are, how many galaxies exist outside of our own. There’s nothing after you.”

You pulled her into a searing kiss, not caring that Steve had yet to tell you to kiss your bride.

You were married. You were hers, and she was yours.

-

And he missed it. Clint missed one of the most important days in his best friend’s life. He still hadn’t responded when you spoke up again. You were bringing him back no matter what. Because she needed you to.

You got him to come back with you. You honestly weren’t too sure how you’d done it; maybe he was just too tired to argue anymore. But it didn’t matter because the two of you were getting in a Quinjet and going back to Natasha.

It took less than twenty minutes for you guys to be off in the air. You set the aircraft on autopilot and left the seat, heading back to put away your things.

“I will admit, I thought we’d be moving a little faster.” Your head cocked to the side at Clint’s words, not quite understanding what he meant.

“Trust me, we’re going as fast as we can. We should be there in a couple of hours.” You were almost out of earshot when he spoke again, but his words caught your attention as if he had screamed them at you.

“What’d you get her for the anniversary?”

“Wha- what do you mean? What’s today’s date?” And as Clint sighed with a shake of his head, you felt your heart sinking in your chest. He didn’t need to answer. You thought back to yesterday’s phone call and you knew exactly where you’d messed up.

-

“Hello? Nat? What are you doing awake? It’s late, you should be asleep.” There was a pause over the phone, and at first, you thought she’d hung up.

“I, um, I just wanted to check in on you.” It wasn’t so much the fact that she called or her words as it was her dejected tone that grabbed your attention, immediately made you concerned.

“Are you okay? What’s wrong? Do you need me to come back?”

“No, no, I’m fine,” she quickly reassured you. “Just… you sure you’re not forgetting anything?” You scanned the supplies you’d laid out on the dresser. A weapon or two, a couple of toiletries, only the necessities. But nothing was missing.

“No, I think I have everything. Why? Did you see something at home?” Another pause. And, still, you chalked it up to bad connection, or maybe the fact that it was late for her, she must’ve been tired.

“No, you didn’t leave anything at home.” You took one last glance at your things before nodding and launching into your plan for how you were going to get Clint back. She wasn’t as excited as you thought she would’ve been, but you never caught it. Even when you ended the call and all she gave you was a quiet goodbye, you never caught it.

-

You entered the compound with a crash, scrambling to find Natasha. It was nighttime when you got back, the lights automatically turning on one by one as you ran through each of the rooms, each of them full of furniture but devoid of life.

First, you reached the kitchen. Natasha hadn’t put away the candles, the wicks drowning in wax as if nobody had bothered to blow them out. One plate of food—which was much fancier than any of the meals you had left for Nat in the fridge—lay untouched on the counter, and you knew that, if you dared to open the fridge, there’d be another plate waiting for you.

Next, you made your way into the living room. A vase of roses sat on the coffee table, but one of them was already wilted, a petal threatening to fall off if you so much as looked at it for too long. A small bunch of heart balloons hovered in the corner. The shadows fell on them in just the right way it seemed, with them looking more like they were threatening to chase after you rather than welcome you home.

You went to your bedroom next. You doubted she would’ve been in there, but some small part of you hoped that you and Clint were wrong; you hadn’t actually missed anything, and Natasha somehow pulled herself away from her work to grab a few hours of sleep. But it wasn’t your wife on the bed. Instead, an unfamiliar yet friendly-looking teddy bear sat on the comforter, the card next to it standing upright. And though every part of you yelled at you not to open it, you did.

It was storebought, but that wasn’t what affected you. What finally broke the dam, made the tears stream down your cheeks, was the brief message she’d written on the inside.

“I know I haven’t been the best wife lately, but you are still my world. The sun, moon, stars, it’s all you, malyshka. It always will be. Happy anniversary.”

It was only then that you set off for the one place you were sure Natasha would be.

---

The smell hit you before you even entered her office. Then, you heard the somewhat incoherent grumbles, each word charged with more anger and sorrow than the last. And so it was more to your horror than surprise when you found her still at her desk, her head in one hand and a bottle of vodka in the other.

“Natty…” A flash of red filled your vision as her head whipped up to see you, but you weren’t sure if the color came from her cheeks or her hair.

“Oh, so you still remember my name?”

“Natty, please, I’m so sorry. I was so hun-” At first, your wife seemed slightly surprised, as if she wasn’t expecting you to apologize. Or maybe she wasn’t expecting you to know what you were apologizing for.

“Don’t you dare call me that right now, Y/N.” If her order didn’t sting, her use of your actual name definitely did. But you pushed away those feelings; right now, it was about her, the way it should’ve been about her yesterday.

“Natasha, let me explain. I was so focused on Clint, on the things we had to get done here. The dates really meant nothing to me.” Her flinches were delayed, slightly sluggish, but they nevertheless hurt to see.

“So the date of our wedding means nothing to you? I got you balloons, Y/N, I got you fucking balloons.” You flinched, but it wasn’t at the sound of the vodka bottle slamming down on the desk or at her words. It was at the words she’d told you on your six month anniversary of dating, the day she’d surprised you with a dinner at a three Michelin star restaurant and a night in a five-star hotel, a luxury you’d never experienced before and never thought you’d have in your life, let alone while you were on the run from the US federal government. But, you’d had to remind yourself as Natasha pulled you into the hotel room with a giggle, this was the world’s best spy you were dating. Of course, if anyone was capable of pulling this off, it was her. 

-

“What are those?” you’d gasped, the glint of the dim lamplight on the mylar catching your attention.

“I got you balloons,” she’d chuckled as she pulled you into her embrace. “I love you so fucking much that I got you balloons. God, I’m such a sap.” You met her lips in a sweet kiss before pulling her closer, if that was even possible.

“You’re my sap.” Nat pressed another kiss to the corner of your mouth, loving the way it curved upwards in a grin. Loving the fact that she made it do that.

“Well, duh, you think I’m going to go out and get balloons for Tony?” You simply giggled, the champagne the two of you had enjoyed earlier that evening only strengthening the joy that bubbled in you. “No. Never. Only for you, detka.” She had punctuated each sentence with a kiss, each one being on a different spot on your face.

“You got me balloons,” you finally whispered, meeting her eyes.

“I got you balloons,” the blonde agreed. You loved the way the green orbs captured your own gaze; you could bathe in the love they held for you.

-

But at this moment, you felt yourself drowning in the sorrow filling her eyes, the fact that she wasn’t crying being one piece of dignity you couldn’t maintain no matter how hard you tried.

“Nat,” you slowly stepped closer to her, your footsteps being the only sound filling the room during the pause. “That’s not what I meant. I just meant I barely processed what day it was at all. The only thing I was focusing on was getting Clint back.” A small part of you knew that Natasha was far too hurt and drunk to be reasoned with at the moment, but you still tried. And the rejection hurt just as much as if you hadn’t been expecting it.

“You don’t love me.” You were by her side in an instant, quick to refute her point.

“That’s not true at a-”

“You don’t love me! Just admit it, Y/N. You don’t love me.”

“Natasha, please-” Your vision was so clouded by tears you could barely make out your surroundings, but the anguish on your wife’s face was somehow clearer than it had been all night.

“You only love me when it benefits you! God, how was I so foolish to believe you could ever love me back in the same way I love you?” And though you tried to stop her, pleaded with her to just listen to you for a second, she never even hesitated for a second, the remaining vodka threatening to spill out out of the bottle with how she swung it in the air. Her insecurities from your relationship, the ones you had spent night after night reassuring her of, were coming out in full force, each word thrown out of her mouth being another punch to your gut.

But it was her last sentence that made you almost double over in pain; the way she looked at you, eyes glassy and her lower lip wobbling, the way she spoke, her voice airy and broken, the way her face was contorted, as if something had broken inside of her. Maybe something had.

“Did I really make you feel safe, or did I just help you not to feel alone?”

-

You knew she was standing outside of your room well before she knocked. Well, you knew someone was standing outside of your room.

Sure, you weren’t expecting the normally-closed off assassin to be the one who entered when you let out a measly “come in,” but you were too wrapped up in your grief to care.

“Wanda made dinner.”

“I don’t want it.” You didn’t have to turn your head to know how she was standing, feet shoulder-width apart and arms crossed over her chest. And maybe, if you cared, you would’ve been scared, but for all you were concerned she could come running full speed at you with widow’s bites in her hand and you wouldn’t even flinch. Maybe you’d welcome it.

“It’s not a negotiation. You’re coming to dinner. You haven’t eaten all day.”

“I’m not hungry.” At first, Natasha didn’t respond. You thought you were safe. She’d turn around, close the door behind her, and you’d be alone once again, the way you should’ve been. The way you always should be. But instead, you heard her approaching footsteps and felt the mattress sink as she perched herself on the edge of your bed.

“You deserve to eat, Y/N. Just because you made a mistake-”

“A mistake is forgetting your phone at home, Nat. I got people killed. I deserve to die.” Natasha paused for a moment, and you felt the weight of her hand as she rested it on your ankle.

“You’re not the first of us to do that. Do you think we deserve to die too?” Anger and frustration swelled in your chest at her words. Of course they didn’t deserve to die; how could you agree to that? But she didn’t understand, you were different because you were you.

You hated the way she trapped you with simple logic, wanting to scream and yell for her to get out. But she was the woman of your dreams, so you stayed silent. She’d leave eventually. They all did. Or maybe you just made them leave, who knows?

But she was there 5 minutes later, 10 minutes later, 15. Half an hour passed and she was still sitting there, her posture just as perfect as when she first sat down.

Another half an hour passed before Natasha sighed, the corner of the mattress lifting. But she didn’t leave the room. Instead, she rounded the bed and sat down next to you, hands folded in her lap and her back against the headboard.

“You’re not going to leave?” you finally asked.

“No.”

“Why?” You hated the way it came out cracked and broken. You were the one who messed up; why were you also the one falling apart?

“Because you deserve to be forgiven. And you don’t deserve to be alone. I’ll stay until you realize that.” It amazed you how she said it so matter-of-factly, how she said it as if it was painfully obvious.

“Then it looks like you’re going to be staying the night.”

“Good thing I wore my pajamas.” It wasn’t until she said that that you finally turned around to look at her. Why was she wearing her pajamas?

“You knew I wasn’t coming out.”

“I had a feeling.” Her shrug was nonchalant, but the way she picked at her fingers suggested she was more nervous than she was trying to let on.

“Why are you here, Tasha?”

“Because I care,” was her answer, spoken softly yet firmly, as if she was challenging you to oppose her. But you let her.

You let her slide down, lay her arm over you. You let her lay a kiss on your forehead, hold you while you slept, fend off the screams of the departed so your dreams didn’t turn into nightmares. And just before you finally dozed off, getting the rest you’d been deprived of for days, you murmured something so quiet she could barely hear it. She’d never forget it.

“Ever since I joined the Avengers, I’m always waiting for someone to leave. Someone getting hurt, getting killed. They’ll leave one way or another and I won’t be able to get them back. I’m always on edge. But you make me feel safe, I think.”

-

“Tasha, you know that’s not true at all. Please,” you tried walking towards her again with one trembling hand outstretched, just to get her to put down the bottle, just to pull her into your arms as you tried to physically show her just how much you really did love her, just to do anything.

She backed away.

It hit you then; you weren’t going to get her back. Not now, at least. Nothing you could say, nothing you could do, could get her to listen to you at this moment.

“Just leave me alone,” she whispered, as if she could read your mind. You always thought the two of you were connected in some way. Maybe she could tell what you were thinking.

But it seemed the connection stopped there. She couldn’t understand how your feet were glued to the floor, how your heart stopped for the umpteenth time that hour, how your eyes scoured any and every part of her for want of some sign that things would be okay. She gave you nothing but a renewed hardening of her gaze, as if she had just remembered her days as one of the world’s most formidable assassins.

“Fine. I’ll leave.” And just like that, she was gone. It didn’t matter that she almost stumbled over the leg of a chair, or how you got an extra strong whiff of vodka as she passed by. What mattered was that she was gone.

---

Natasha got you balloons, filled you with joy and love as if you were a child at the center of attention during their birthday party. And you, distracted by all the other decorations that surrounded you, had let them go, the strings slipping out of your grip and floating to unreachable heights.

You had let her go.

-----

🏷 : @vancityfire13 @007giu

[olivia-anderson-fanfic]

Into The Unknown, Part 11

First

Previous

Marinette was going to kill Tim.

His alarm had been going off for about three minutes now and she was going to kill him.

She sighed and finished the wing of her eyeliner and poked her head out of the bathroom to Definitely Not Curse In Front Of A Baby.

His phone was facedown and threatening to buzz itself off of the kitchen table.

She rolled her eyes and walked over to silence it, then looked around for the person who, for some reason, didn’t do that.

Tim… looked like he might already be dead?

He was still in bed, but he had also pulled all the blankets off of the corners in order to cocoon himself properly. She hesitantly glanced back at Damian, who was currently pretending to put makeup on the plush cat’s (named ‘Cat’, of course, she was beginning to sense a theme here) face. Alright, he was distracted for at least a little while.

She made her way over to Tim and, after tossing his phone onto the bedside table because she wasn’t actually sure whether she had pressed snooze or cancel, sat next to him. “Tim? You alright?”

He groaned a little and attempted to roll his cocoon away from her. It wasn’t really working. The blankets were holding him down. He had been betrayed by what he loved.

Marinette sighed and reached a hand out to feel his forehead.

Not too warm but definitely a little feverish.

She shook her head slightly and walked over to the medicine cabinet. Damian watched her with interest, green eyes wide. She flashed the kid a smile to say everything was okay -- even if it might not be from the looks of things -- and then pulled a pill bottle from the shelf. Tim had brought his meds over from the other world and she had assumed that he had made sure to give himself a prescription in this world while he was making their identities but...

Yep. He needed a refill.

“Dumbass,” she murmured, shaking her head as she put it back.

She pulled out her phone and checked to make sure that she could bring Damian to work even as an intern… yep! At least that was good.

She sighed and looked over at Tim, who had barely moved outside of pulling his phone into the cocoon. It wasn’t on, no light was emanating from it, apparently he just wanted to have it with him. Maybe it was like a stuffed animal for him, she joked mentally.

...

She sighed. Man, it was hard to tease him when he looked like that.

(… because it was too easy, obviously. What other reasons were there?)

Fine. She’d save it all up for later. For now she could be… nice-ish.

“Got a favorite tea?”

He mumbled more incoherently than Damian for a few moments before managing to choke out: “Coffee.”

She resisted the urge to flick him on the forehead and instead just got up to make him some lemon and ginger tea. Because even the most basic of bitches can’t hate lemon and ginger tea.

When she started back over Damian saw her walk past and made a quiet sound in the back of his throat to get her attention. He reached his hands out for her. She sighed and clumsily pulled him out of the high chair with one arm and positioned him on her hip.

Marinette set the tea on the bedside table. Tim glared at her for a moment and then looked pointedly at the drink.

“When you get better I’ll brew you coffee myself, but you need to at least try and be healthy until you heal up,” she promised with only minimal eye rolling.

“Not what I’m mad about,” he said, still looking at the drink as if he could will it to… be right or something.

“... do you want sugar or cream or...?” She asked once it became clear he was trying to make her guess.

“Coaster,” he said.

She groaned and quickly found one. She threw it down far harsher than was strictly necessary. Tim was worse than her mom about coasters. Let her ruin the furniture, damn it!

By the time she had gotten back Damian had started trying to crawl into the cocoon and, while the idea of the baby trying to heal Tim via cuddles was very cute, Marinette had to pull him away. Babies don’t have immune systems yet, she was pretty sure. Putting him around a sick Tim was basically asking to end up with two sick idiots to take care of.

Damian squirmed in her hands, trying to free himself so he could get back to Tim. “Bu… Nano!”

Tim smiled weakly and reached a hand out to rest on top of Damian’s head. “It’s fine, kiddo. Just gonna… sleep a little.”

“And you’re going to be coming with me to work! Doesn’t that sound fun?” She asked in her sweetest voice.

Damian scowled. “Nano.”

“‘Nano’ needs sleep,” she tried again.

Damian shook his head. Marinette glanced at the time and cringed. Alright. Looks like there’s no time to do this in a gentle way.

She glanced at Kaalki. “Lock the door behind me?”

Kaalki looked up. She had… put a portal on the ceiling on the floor and was, apparently, trying to see how fast she could get the empty water bottle to fall before it started to melt.

The kwami shrugged. Marinette was going to take it as a yes.

She allowed Damian to get one last hug from Tim while she slipped on her shoes and gathered everything she’d need for the day... and then she grabbed him and sprinted out the door before the kid could get too angry.

… and so, screaming baby in her arms, she ran to catch the train.

The crying didn’t stop for a long time. Or maybe it was only five minutes. It still felt like forever. It was the first time Damian was really away from Tim (when she was taking care of Damian Tim was still in the house and able to get there at any point, so those times didn’t really count) in almost three months. Of course the kid was freaking out.

… he was definitely going to freak out even more when he realized that Marinette was leaving, too.

Was it too late to call in sick for work?

Probably.

Well, it was going to have to happen eventually.

She groaned a little to herself and hugged Damian closer in her lap, chin resting on top of his head. The subway was interesting to him, it seemed. That was fair. Public transportation is weird. There was a guy doing stripper moves on one of the poles and Marinette was hardly even phased. At least Damian was enjoying it, clapping excitedly and yelling “raqs!” at the ‘performer’.

But, all too soon, she reached her stop. She waved to the man with Damian and then carried him out to her job.

There was a lot of paperwork involved with signing a kid up for daycare. She didn't know why this surprised her, but it did. It was a pain, too. Remembering all the fake birth dates and names and affiliations that they had come up with. She had been tempted to pull up her cheat sheet on her phone but she was scared that would make her look like an incompetent parent -- or worse, like she was faking the entire thing and wasn’t even biologically or legally related to the kid.

It was an irrational fear, she knew, but damn was it prevalent.

So, she just glared at the papers. She could see Damian doing the same from where he had sat himself down on the table, occasionally glancing over to make sure that this was still what they were doing. It was kind of cute. It was very hard to remain angry through that.

She nuzzled her nose against his cheek, smiling at the little giggles he gave.

She went back to the paperwork in considerably lighter spirits. Once she had finally filled out all the vaccination records (and made a mental note to actually try and figure out how many vaccines the kid had, if any) she sighed and turned to the kid.

“Alrighty, I gotta go to work, Dami.”

Damian didn’t understand much English yet, a byproduct of suddenly being introduced to the language after a year of only being spoken to in Arabic, but he certainly understood what those words meant: she was about to leave him.

And it wasn’t like he didn’t cry a little when she left every day, the little sniffles and pleading looks weren’t at all new to her. But, now that Tim wasn’t there, he was full-on wailing. He crawled to the edge of the table, towards her, and she had to lunge to catch him before he fell…

But apparently this was the plan, because he instantly fisted his little hands in her shirt and curled up in her arms.

… damn. How was she supposed to just leave when he was like this…?

She held him tighter, nuzzling her face in his hair. “It’s just a little while, Dami. I’ll be back. I’ll come back. Sa’aeud. I’ll be back.”

Damian buried himself closer in her shirt and she sighed, looking up at the poor daycare worker.

“I’m sorry…”

“First time you’re leaving him with someone else?” The woman said with a kind smile. Her name was Ava, according to her name tag.

Marinette nodded helplessly. Damian had wrapped his little legs around her. His grip was surprisingly strong. It would definitely take a lot of effort to pry the kid off. If she walked over to her boss he could see the situation and he might give her the day off, he was just a few floors away, she should at least try --.

Ava knelt down next to her and reached a hand for Damian.

Slowly, reluctantly, Marinette opened her arms so the woman could detach Damian from her.

“All kids are like this the first few times. Think of it as a compliment: he thinks you’re safe.”

Marinette nodded slightly and helped pull one of Damian’s hands from her shirt. Damian stopped crying to look up at her, eyes wide and glassy with tears, and then he started crying harder, she hadn’t even thought that that was possible --.

Ava managed to pull Damian off of Marinette and, while the kid was still, he was still hiccuping he was crying so hard.

Marinette gave him a sad smile. “It’ll be okay, Dami. ‘ant bi’aman. Sa’aeud.”

He didn’t look like he believed her assurances.

“Mar-ree?” He tried, one last time, reaching one little hand out for her.

She gently took the hand, pressing a kiss into his palm. “I gotta go to work, Dami.”

Damian’s hand dropped.

Ava gave her a tiny smile and knocked shoulders with her. “Cheer up. You did everything right by saying you’ll come back to him. Say that every time and, eventually, he’ll start to believe you.”

She nodded. She wasn’t happy about it, though. She just watched Damian cry as he was taken into the daycare room until Ava had the sense to close the door.

… when she came back at the end of the day, Damian was enjoying himself.

He was playing a game with Ava. Ava would try and build something with blocks and he would wait until he had determined that she was almost done before knocking it over. What an asshole. She loved him.

She smiled faintly and waved at him when he noticed her. He instantly lit up, pushing himself up onto shaky feet and toddling (wait, is that why they’re called toddlers?!) over to her. He was getting better at walking. He managed to get three-fourths of the way across the room before he fell to his knees and crawled the rest of the way. She smiled and picked him up, nuzzling her nose against his cheek.

“Hey, Dami.”

“Mar-ree! Hi!”

Aw, he learned what ‘hi’ means! She thought but she wasn’t going to say that aloud.

“Make any friends?” She said instead.

Damian stared at her with wide eyes. She smiled and pressed a kiss to the top of his head.

Ava gave her a tiny smile as she walked over. “Sorry, but I do have to ask for ID.”

“... you saw me drop him off… literally this morning?”

“Yeah, I know. Just protocol,” she said, giving an apologetic smile.

Marinette shrugged a little and nodded, carefully shifting Damian to one arm so she could do that. She also had to fill out a little paper that asked for a review of their services and any suggestions. Marinette wrote the words ‘pay the people more’, because taking care of one kid was stressful enough, she couldn’t imagine taking care of multiple at the same time, no amount of money would be enough to convince her to do that.

After she had signed every form that needed signing, she was free to leave.

And so, a good two hours after she usually left work, she started on the commute home with her kid.

Damian enjoyed the ride home even more than the ride there. The person that had been sitting next to Marinette had brought a sketchbook along and, when Damian had watched with that wide-eyed baby stare, had given him a piece of paper and pencil so he could do some work of his own.

Damian presented Marinette with a bunch of scribbles halfway through the ride, beaming widely.

“Tell me about your work,” she said jokingly.

Damian seemed to get it, because he took the paper from her and started babbling along and pointing to different areas as he explained what his thought process was.

(And, if Marinette missed her stop so he could talk longer, well, no one had to know.)

~~~~~

Next

@unoriginalmess @hammalammadamdam @astrynyx @laurcad123 @927roses-and-stuff @toodaloo-kangaroo

[enchantedblackrose]

Like I Love You

Jay Halstead/Plus sized Reader

Summary: Jay arrives at your apartment to pick you up for a date, but you're filled with self doubt.

¡Warnings! This potentially could be triggering. Poor body image, possible body dysmorphia, specific mentions of feelings of not being enough because of physical appearance

<Please, please lmk if I need to add any warnings.>

Loosely inspired by One Direction's Little Things

Like I Love You 

Your head throbs as hot tears of frustration continue to fall from your eyes. 

It was absolutely ridiculous to be this upset trying to pick out a decent outfit. After all, you've been successfully dressing yourself since age three.

But you don't have the mindset of a toddler. You're a jaded young woman with society's disgusting definition of beauty constantly shoved in your face. 

Deep down you know better. You know that the numbers on the scale give no indication of your beauty nor do they dictate your worth.

Sighing and trying to remind yourself that you are pretty, you again glance in the full length mirror. Standing there in nothing more than a top and underwear, fresh tears immediately fill your eyes. You only see flaws. Resisting the urge to poke at the cellulite near your thighs, you focus on your shirt. But the sleeves are cutting into your arms making them look weird. No, not weird. Fat. The too tight sleeves cause your arms to bulge. And the material clings to your soft tummy. You pinch the excess belly fat between your thumbs and index fingers, wishing you could squeeze it away.

You feel so ugly and gross. Angrily you pull the shirt off and throw it clear across your bedroom, where it joins a pair of jeans you couldn't breathe in and numerous other offending articles of clothing. None of which you look good in either.

You find an oversize t-shirt and slip it on before you just collapse on that very spot of plush carpeting.

Tears still roll down your face. All you wanted was something cute to wear. To be pretty. And go out with your boyfriend for a date night. He's a detective for the Chicago police department. The hours are already long and sometimes abnormal, but this week he, and the rest of the special unit he's a part of,  were logging extra hours on a particular difficult case. You haven't seen much of each other recently so you were especially giddy when you received his text earlier in the day saying there had been a break in the case which meant he could swing by your place and take you out on a proper date. Your reply had been almost immediate, telling him how wonderful that sounded.

You were surprised to hear from him again, still promising to take you out, but proposing you both meet up with his coworkers after dinner for some drinks. He included "begging" and "puppy dog eyes" in the message. 

Though you wanted to, you couldn't exactly say no for several reasons. You had already agreed to the date, so he knew you were free. Part of you suspected that he had done it on purpose. You'd accuse your favorite detective of entrapment later. 

You also were fully aware how much Jay wanted to introduce you to the coworkers he considered friends, having been invited to go out with them several times before. You kept putting it off.

Not because you had no interest in meeting everyone. Rather, the idea fed your worst insecurities.

What if they don't think I'm good enough? They're going to wonder what he sees in me. Then Jay will start wondering too. 

Wanting to do this solely for Jay's benefit, believing he deserved this after the hellish week at work, you went to your bedroom to plan your outfit. That's how you ended up in this nightmare. You only want to look your best, like you belong with Jay.

Nothing in your closet said that though. The truth of the matter was no one like him should be with someone who looks like you.

Cries turn to sobs. You draw your knees to your chest, hugging them tightly.

You hear the door to your apartment unlock, Jay using his copy of your key to let himself in. Hastily, you wipe at your face, not wanting him to see you like this; yet you can't find the will to stand. A loud, nasally sniff escapes you.

"Babe?" His still unaware voice calls out from the hallway. "I got us reservations." You don't answer back right away and you hear his footsteps approach. 

Having found you, he stops in the doorway. "Whoa. What kind of nuclear clothing explosion happened here?" He indicates to the mounds of clothes which surround you and cover the better part of the carpet and bed. His laughter dies as soon as he sees your tear-streaked, puffy face. "What's wrong? Are you hurt?" his worry evident in both his voice and light eyes. He looks you up and down, frantically searching for any sign of what has you like this.

You mumble incoherently.

"What?"

"I don't have anything to wear."

"The floor begs to differ," he teases. You glare back, in no mood for jokes no matter how well intended. He holds up his hands signaling he meant no harm before he pulls you to your feet. "What's going on?" You huff a heavy sigh in reply. His hand caresses your cheek and softly "hmms?" at you encouragingly.

"Nothing fits right," you confess. He hesitates unsure how to respond, so you continue. "I look extra fat in everything."

Jay frowns. "I doubt that very much. You always look good. I love how you look dolled up when we go out and I love when you're in an old tee and sweats."

"That's nice of you to say-"

"Well I didn't say it to be nice. I said it because it's true," he cuts you off.

You give a tiny, weak smile. "I hate how I look." Your voice cracks. New tears sting your eyes.

He brushes the few teardrops that manage to escape with his thumb. "Baby, what are you talking about? You're beautiful." His voice is soft with a hint of sadness hearing you talk this way.

"This is not beautiful." You pat your flabby stomach, then your thighs. 

Carefully stepping to avoid the clothes which litter the floor, Jay makes his way to your bed and sits on the edge, still mindful of the garments piled there as well. He opens his arms, indicating for you to sit on his lap.

"My huge ass will probably crush you," you mutter.

"Baby-"

 

Exasperated you throw your arms up, "I look nothing like you!"

"Well I'm a guy and you're not so…"

"Stop. I mean you look like a freaking model. That face and those abs for days." You catch him looking smug, no doubt a witty remark is at his lips, but one glance at you and he leaves it unsaid. You continue. Your voice hushed, "I'm afraid of what people might think or say when they see us together. It's why I've been so reluctant to meet your friends."

His eyes sadden. He reaches for you, gently pulling you to his lap. When he speaks, his voice is soft, but stern, almost begging you to believe his words. "I'm sorry you feel that way. I honestly had no idea, but listen to me, please. The only people who get a say about our relationship are in this room right now, okay? So our opinions are the only ones that matter. You. Are. Beautiful." He pauses only to shush you when he sees your mouth open. "The way your mind works fascinates me. Your sense of humor is amazing. You continuously show compassion for others, which in this world is not always easy. I swear your goodness is innate. Your laugh is intoxicating. When you smile...I wish you could see how your face lights up and your body turns me on exactly how it is. I have never been attracted to anyone as much as I am to you. I love you."

Jay's words move you, but they're not enough to silence your insecurities. "Even though I don't have a thigh gap?"

His brows furrow. "I...don't know what that means."

"It means my thighs touch each other. They're not supposed to."

"Says who?"

"...society."

"Society's ugly, not you or your thighs." His fingers trace nondescript patterns on the bare skin in question. "Besides, thick thighs save lives."

"Jay!" You laugh despite yourself. He smiles in return and presses his lips to your temple.

"I love you too. You know that, right?" You ask, realizing you hadn't said it back and he nods. A hand intertwines with his as you look in his eyes, "I'm sorry I'm such a mess."

"You're not. We all have insecurities or things we don't like about ourselves. I just wish you weren't so hard on yourself. I'm sorry too if you felt I was putting pressure on you to meet everyone."

"Not at all," you shake your head. "That's just me being me."

"Still, if my friends have a problem with us being together for any reason, they're not the people I think they are. Truly though, they'd love you. Hell, if we didn't show up together I could see one of them hitting on you," Jay pauses if imagining it.  "But seriously. They'd adore you. First, because they're going to see firsthand how good you are for me. Then because you're you. Funny, smart-"

"But I want to be pretty, Jay. And look like we belong together."

Jay sighs, but not out of frustration with you. He's only concerned."You are. And we do. I know nothing I say is going to magically change how you see yourself...I get that. You have to be the one to work this out. I really wish you could see yourself through my eyes and love yourself like I love you. Maybe then you'd understand you're so worthy of self-love. I promise, I'm right here and I'm going to keep reminding you how beautiful you are in hopes you'll start to see it."

Your hand caresses his cheek as you fight the urge to cry again. He leans into your touch. "You do help," you tell him because it's true and to reassure him. "I'm so lucky to have you. I'm really going to try to not be so down on myself. Besides. I  really don't want to ruin any more of our nights."

He waves you off. "A night trying to get you to see your beauty is not ruined. And the night's still young. We'll do whatever you're up for. Go out for a bit. Stay in and order food. Whatever."

A small smile appears on your face. You quickly peck his lips with yours. "I just want to wash my face before we do anything." Jay nods. You slide off his lap and head to your bathroom across the hall.

The light flickers for a second as soon as you hit the switch. You go to the sink, turning the water on and letting it run to get to the perfect temperature. Standing there, you glance into the vanity mirror. Your face is still slightly puffy with a few soft pink splotches across your cheeks from all your crying. You splash the water on your face and repeat the action several more times before using a fluffy towel to pat dry your face. You stare back into the mirror. And smile. It reaches your eyes and illuminates your face. You reach a realization. However fleeting or permanent, you don't know. But right now in this moment, you feel it. 

You're pretty.

-

[spike-and-faye]

Hello, I require your infinite wisdom please!! :O So I just finished cowboy bebop and I am so confused like who the fuck was Julia. WHAT was Faye's past. I literally never process tv shows and the bebop was not immune to my stupidity LMAO like... I guess the ending just really confused me, from what I gathered Spike and Vicious were friends? But then they weren't? And Julia dated Vicious but also Spike? And he? Went after Vicious even after Julia had died? I am Confusion. Please help. Thank u...

Oh BABEY I am so glad you asked! :) Be prepared for a long answer and I apologize in advance for how incoherent it will probably be.

ALSO Please note: this show is fucking complicated. I have watched it all the way through several times a year, every single year, for over a decade now, and I am *STILL* finding new shit every time I watch it. It's packed with symbols, motifs, allusions and underlying themes that are just so rich. It is so extraordinarily well-written that it could give a lot of classic literature a run for its money. I'm literally working on an in depth literary/film analysis my husband lovingly calls my Manifesto on the series right now. SO PLEASE don't beat yourself up about not catching everything on the first go round.

HEY BTW for anyone who hasn't finished the show, please know there will be MANY spoilers ahead!

Anyways ~

1.     Spike / Julia / Vicious:

The information we get on Spike's past, including Vicious and Julia, is pretty limited considering how big of an impact they have on the story. We get our first glimpse in Session 1: Asteroid Blues, then again in Session 5: Ballad of Fallen Angels, Sessions 12 + 13: Jupiter Jazz, and Sessions 25 + 26: Real Folk Blues. I recommend reviewing these episodes for you Julia and Vicious fix.

What we know:

Spike and Vicious were both members of an organized crime syndicate called the Red Dragons, which is roughly analogous to the Yakuza or the Mafia. Their positions in the organization are not clear, but there are some images alluding to them being hitmen, and they likely rose up in the ranks as they were close acquaintances of Mao Yenrai, a Capo of the Red Dragon.

Spike and Vicious were close comrades. Spike taught Vicious everything he knew about fighting, and the two had a deep trust in each other. Which Spike fucked up ….

^^Vicious looks hot asf here

Julia was Vicious' lover/girlfriend. One night in 2068 (three years prior to the time we watch in the Bebop) Spike is injured, presumably from a syndicate-related fight and he passes out in front of her door. She takes him in and nurses him back to health and he SIMPS HARD for her. We’re all but told he's in LOVE love with her. They start an affair, and Spike tells her he's ready to abandon the whole life - the syndicate, Vicious, Mao, all of it - and they could run away together.

WELL Vicious finds out about this whole affair, and is DOUBLY betrayed because his literal best friend and girlfriend have been having an affair, and tbh I think he was just as jealous of Spike's attentions as he was of Julia's. (Whether or not it’s a sexual thing for Spike … well … I have my own headcanons about that). SO when he finds out they're going to run away together, he gives Julia an ultimatum: you can either kill him, or I'll just kill you both. Spike had written her a letter about meeting him in the graveyard to start their new life together, which she tears up to hide his location from Vicious. (This is the falling ripped up pieces of paper we see in Spike's flash back in Session 5).

^^ r/gifsyoucanhear

**NOTE: There are those who disagree with this view, (looking at you Cowboy Bebop wiki) instead suggesting Vicious and Spike were buds in the past, but then hated each other once they were both considered as potential successors to Mao. That's why Vicious wanted him dead, and he was enlisting Julia (who he didn't necessarily have a romantic connection to) to help kill Spike since he knew Spike loved her. Personally, I think there is plenty of evidence that Vicious also wanted Julia, and in fact was already with her, when Spike started seeing her. If you want me to cite my sources please send an me an ask about it :)

Spike gets the idea, whether by her just not showing up or word around the syndicate being like YO Vicious wants you dead. Despite Vicious' ultimatum to Julia, he was gunna kill Spike either way. SO he sets up an ambush, and SadBoy™ Spike walks intentionally into their trap. Somehow, he doesn't die, though the entire syndicate thinks he did. (Note Annie's reaction to seeing him alive in Session 5). It’s also implied that this is where he lost his eye.

HIS EYE - possibly the most important symbol in the show so I do have to mention it. In episode 26, he explicitly explains to Faye that one of his eyes only sees the past. (PS this isn't dissimilar to Jet's arm… we can get into that another time). Basically, he's constantly living halfway in the past and halfway in the present, and describes the past like a dream he can never wake up from. Because dysfunctional or not - the syndicate WAS his family. (Again - see his relationship with Annie, Mao, and Vicious (prior to Spike's betrayal)). It's his reminder that Julia didn't run away with him, and that he'd left behind that life for her. (He didn’t know she was being threatened until the final episode). Basically Spike is hyper-fixated on what he had and what could've been.

Not long after this, Spike starts bounty hunting because like? What else is he going to do. He doesn't care if he lives or dies but if he has to be alive, he may as well be able to eat. He joins up with Jet Black on the Bebop.

TL; DR: Spike stole Vicious' lover, Julia, so Vicious made Julia choose between her killing Spike or Vicious killing them both. She instead went into hiding and Spike thought he'd been stood up. He fake died and got the hell outta dodge.

2.     What was Faye's past?

Ok let me start by saying Faye is my wife and my life. HOWEVER I hated her the first time I watched this show circa age 13 because I thought she was annoying/vain/shallow (also because #internalizedmisogyny lol am I right fam). Good news! She is all those things! But she's also very lonely and scared and an amnesiac and secretly a sweetie and she realizes she loves the crew of the Bebop like family.

SO my wife's backstory:

she was born in the 1990s (#only90skidsremember). There's some debate over her race/nationality, but due to the images of her hanging out in Merlion Park in Singapore, my bet is that she's Singaporean. She comes from a wealthy family with a big house, and we see some utterly *adorable* film of her as a child/young adolescent in Session 18: Speak Like a Child. I cry everytime </3

^^ Holla for the representation

In 2014, circa age 20, she and her parents were going into space when the shuttle they were on had some kind of malfunction/accident and it killed an unknown number of people, including her parents. At the time, the technology didn’t exist to be able to save her, so she was put into a cryogenic sleep state. Meanwhile, the Lunar Gate accident occurs, breaking up the moon and causing rock showers on Earth's surface. Most people died, moved to Mars, or settled underground.

She wakes up from her cryogenic sleep in 2068. (Also the year Spike leaves the syndicate.) She's 'woken' by the corrupt Dr. Bacchus who plans on charging her for the years and years of medical debt she's accrued. (See Session 15: My Funny Valentine.) Luckily a lawyer takes interest in her case (Whitney Haggus Matsumoto) and tries to help get rid of her debt. The two fall in love, but turns out Whitney is a Scumbag. He's actually Dr. Bacchus's nephew, and faked his death, writing Faye as the sole inheritor to his will. This means she'll take on all his debts. So baby girl has LOTS of debt at this point.

In the intervening years prior to her joining the Bebop, she gambles, cheats, gains a lot of street smarts, and adopts a very seductive character to get her way. She joins the crew on the Bebop in Session 3: Honky Tonk Women.

TL;DR: Faye is Austin powers

YIKES this is so long I am so sorry. Bitches are obsessed with this show. (I am bitches)

3.     The Ending

Okay I'm going to present this in the way, in my scholarly opinion, would be correct, though there are SO many interpretations other than simply 'Spike died :/".

To understand the plot of the last couple episodes we actually have to go back to Session 5: Mao is instructed* to sign a treaty with a rival syndicate called the White Tigers. (*He's instructed by The Van (Council of identical creepy old men) who are the actual head of the dragon. I think we only see them in Session 26.) Well - Vicious is a Bastard Man and he and his fellow mutineers blow up the White Tiger guys' ship and slit Mao's throat. Before he dies, Mao is like "Gotdamnit if Spike was still here this shit wouldn't have happened." Later in the Cathedral battle, Vicious explains to Spike he killed Mao because Mao 'lost his fangs'. He planned on killing Spike for good her, IMO, so there'd be no rival to take over as Capo for the Dragons.

^^These guys are The Van btw

THEN in Session 25, the Van basically catches Vicious and is like “you killed Mao and now you have to go to Time Out.” The Van also decides to just kill everyone associated with Vicious, just 2 B safe. That's why there's a big ass shootout at the Loser Bar where Jet and Spike are chilling, drinking, (missing Faye and Ed and Ein lol) and Shin (younger brother to Lin, who's helping Vicious overthrow the Dragon) explains all this to Spike. OH and PS JULIA IS ALIVE AND HERE IS HER LOCATION :). (**Notice Spike's reaction at this point is different than his reaction in Jupiter Jazz when he hears there's a Julia on Calisto. Much less excited… hmm…).

SO THEN you know we get some flashbacks of the past as previously explained *and* Julia just happens to run into Faye. She recognizes that Faye is one of Spike's friends from the Bebop (she was keeping tabs on him it seems) and picks her up. Faye doesn't know who Julia is but is like damn bitch I'm a little gay for you. (I mean … that may just be my bi ass projecting, but Faye is REALLY struck with her. Look at how she describes her to Jet, I mean come on.)

 Faye's like, 'we should team up' and Julia says 'no thanks but also tell Spike to meet me at *the place*'. Meanwhile back on the Bebop Spike and Jet are talking and Spike goes on about some dream woman who was his other half. (We assume he means Julia … I have my reasons to doubt this … I have a lot of angry DMs about my opinion here lol but I just do not give a fuck (: I can expand on this in another post or you can refer to the title of my fucking blog haha) Personally, I think Watanabe personally left this specific scene open ended, the same way he does with the ending and various other things.

more like SIMP Spiegel

ANYWAY Faye comes back to the Bebop to tell Spike about Julia, and Jet gets intel from a former cop buddy that there's some shit going down with the Dragons. (Again, the Van is hunting down everyone ever associated with Vicious, including your pal Spike). Bebop is attacked, Faye tells Spike what's up with Julia, and he heads out.

 PAN TO VICIOUS chained up - about to be executed - but what's that!? It's a bird!? It's a pla- no it's just a bird. (With one glowing red eye … hm … reminds me of Spike, also the drug Red Eye. Pls let me know if you have any thoughts on this). Just a bird with a BOMB! Explosion (RIP bird c. 2065 - too soon), Vicious kills the elders, his buddies show up and are ready to go fuck shit up.

this show could not be more of an aesthetic

MMMPhhh okay RAINY CEMETERY. Spike and Julia. She draws a gun, explains why she didn't meet him that day, and then hugs him. Now Spike is not *great* at showing his emotions but he literally just stands there. Maybe it's a stoic expression of how sad he is that he never knew she still cared, when it seemed like she dumped him. Maybe he's finally getting some closure on his past. Maybe the past doesn't mean the same thing it used to. (I'll elaborate later on this).

They go to Annie's to get stocked up on stuff, she lets them know she denied knowing Spike was still alive and hey also the Van was assassinated by Vicious and his guys so. Watch out for that. Then her shop is surrounded by Vicious' guys and she dies :(. Spike and Julia escape to the roof, but she's shot and dies in Spike's arms, and says 'it's all just a dream' :(. (Refer to: Spike living in a dream of the past).

Anyway Jet SAID he wasn't gunna go after Spike but. Jet's parental instincts kick in (oh yeah he was shot in the leg earlier btw) and he goes to Sitting Bull to see if he knows where Spike is. He basically says yeah Spike's about to die somewhere. (I want to do a further analysis on all the Sitting Bull scenes.) Well conveniently Spike returns to the Bebop, eats, tells his story about a tiger-striped cat. (At one point Jet asks if he's going there for her, and Spike is like well she's dead now so whatever). THEN we get to the scene where Faye is like HEY YOU CAN'T GO OFF AND DIE ASSHOLE and he's like ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ I 've been living in the past so I might as well see if I'm living now. (**This will play heavily into my interpretation of the ending). Faye is pissed, shoots the ceiling and he goes off to the syndicate headquarters to fuck shit up.

He basically John Wicks his way through the building, Shin dies, he and Vicious have the big boss battle and whatnot. He kills Vicious and stumbles back out down the stairs and says "Bang!" and collapses. We pan to the sky and see a star fade away.

Well that explains the plot … now here's what I think happened!!! ALSO may I mention, anon - you picked up on something I feel like a lot of people miss out on. Why *did* Spike go back to kill Vicious if Julia was already dead??

Basically, once it became clear that anyone associated with Vicious was being killed, Spike knew they'd hunt him down, and they weren't beneath Kill-Billing their way to him, (i.e. systematically destroying this companions to get to him). And for all his apparent indifference - he really loves his new found family. Jet is literally like an older brother to him. Ed is a little sister. Ein is well … a very good boy. And Faye? Well the relationship is complicated, and I'm not going to get into the 69,420 reasons I ship them here, but I think it is beyond argument that he really does care for her, even if that just in a filial way. He didn't want the syndicates to kill them for their association to him, or in order to get to him. So he did what he had to do to protect them. *AND NO* I am not saying that he didn't love Julia. But it was clear that his desire was no longer to run away with her. I think he genuinely loved and cared about her, but at some point between Jupiter Jazz Pt 2 and now, he accepted that their time together was over. Now he had a new raison d'etre, which is the Bebop.

I think at this point Spike has 'woken up' to reality (as he implied to Faye in their final conversation in episode 26: "Look at these eyes. One of them is a fake, because I lost it in an accident. Since then, I have been seeing the past in one eye, and the present in the other. I had believed that what I saw was not all of reality...I thought I was watching a dream that I would never awaken from. Before I knew it, the dream was all over." (This is from the sub btw I'm too lazy to look up the dub transcript.) He wasn't going there to die, he's going to find out if he's really alive. This line is fucking cool and everything - but it's implications are multitude. I won't go into them all here but basically : what makes him alive now is that he's free from his past. He's alive because he has this new family and protecting them is all he really wants now. Spike was protecting Jet, Faye, Ed, (and Ein) by going and facing the entire syndicate, knowing that their lives would all be in danger.

SO - did Spike die? Well again - Watanabe has purposely and artfully left this open ended. Well, if we're following the symbolism from Sitting Bull, then yeah, the man is as dead as disco, and wouldn't that be a fitting ending? BUT at the same time, Spike always refers to having 'died' before (meaning when he was ambushed by the syndicate, and they all thought he died, and he pretty much did). Don't forget that in  movie (takes places roughly between episodes 22 + 23, and yes, was made AFTER the series but whatever) he like .. DIES dies. He goes to the afterlife and everything. He wakes up to find he's chilling with Sitting Bull, who's like nah it wasn't your time to die yet. So the fact Sitting Bull confirms Spike will die in the final episode, means yeah, Spike is pretty much dead.

BUT -- okay now hear me out -- could this death in the final episode be a death to his previous life? The person he was in the syndicate? Now that he's extinguished the Red Dragons for good, is it not possible that its merely *that* life which has ended? That's the optimist in me saying that, but if it keeps me from staying up all night crying, I guess it'll have to do. Watanabe definitely wants to leave it up to the viewer, so whatever you think, I feel like there's validity to it.

WELL any anon, sorry for the fucking lecture - and believe me, I could've said MUCH, MUCH more - but I enjoyed this question. I always love talking about this show so please all you fuckers feel free to message me or send an ask about anything any time. I am really slow at replying because #life'sAbitch.

Love you all.

SY,SCB <3

[mantistog]

Can you do a part 2 of apex predator?? Pretty please 🥺

Honestly, I had so many ideas but I had to bring in the family dynamic. I just love to see Five handle his siblings questioning his choices. Also, definitely making a whole ass umbrella academy blog. 

_____________________________________________

Yandere! Five Hargreeves x reader: Sickness. 

You wake up, noticing that you’re still wrapped up in Fives arms and an abundance of blankets. This alarms you in a way, as you have never once woken up before him. Not only that, but his breathing is slightly heavier than it normally is. You try to wiggle out of his hold as subtly as possible, but he just presses you tighter into him and mumbles something incoherent. You basically have to shove him and the blankets away to roll over and look at the clock, which you find that it’s much later than the usual time you get out of bed. Taking in a whiff of his scent, deciding to smell him up you already conclude that he is sick. Just to make sure though, you decide to put your hand on his forehead and you quickly remove it realizing just how hot he is.

You get out of bed, going to the kitchen and rummaging through the cabinets, not finding a single can of soup. Five never was fond of it, but you just assumed you’d have some laying around. Then you take to the bathroom, not finding any medicine you know what to do with either. You decided to make him hot milk, which you know he won’t appreciate either but it’s all you can think of. When you return he is sitting up slightly, a hand pressed firmly to his head as he groans. You place the mug gently on the nightstand, sitting down next to the bed and putting your head on it and looking up at him worried. 

You really don’t know what you’d do with yourself if Five wasn’t here. It’s like you unlearned to care for yourself. Even simple tasks like heating that milk seemed like a battle. Five pats your head, but looks down at the cup in disgust. “I’m not drinking that.” You hiss, grabbing onto his arm aggressively, and he looks surprised as he reels back a bit. “You NEED to drink it. It will help!” You reason with him, pleading up at him with your eyes. He looks away, just the movement of his head making him tired. You know if you’d done this while he was completely normal he would have punished you. Maybe you liked him better sick.

There’s silence, as he slowly grabs the mug and chugs the warm milk. He lets out a disgusted groan and puts the mug back down. You smile at him, pawing at his hand in a sign of approval. He can’t say he doesn’t enjoy the positive attention for once. “We don't have any medicine.” You inform him. He looks away like he has a secret, or maybe it’s regret. You can’t tell. “Yeah, I didn’t think it was safe to have any in the house.” There’s really no time to ask him what he means before he changes subject. “Can you get me the phone?” You nod, getting it for him. You’re silent as he puts in the number and the phone rings.

“It’s me. I’m going to need you to come over with some stuff.” You can hear static on the other end and talking, but no matter how much you strain your ears you can’t tell what the other part is saying. “I’m sick. I need medicine and.. Soup.” He says the last word with contempt and your nose scrunches up. You like soup. Maybe Five could learn to like it too. There’s some resistance but the other person finally agrees and Five hangs up after giving an address. Your address, you suppose. It’s not like he’s ever bothered to tell you. You can tell Five is less than pleased at having to let someone in, but you get giddy with the thought of seeing another living person for the first time in forever. 

Five grabs onto you, guiding you back into bed with him where you both cuddle up together. It’s way too hot, but Five seems to be shivering. You cuddle up to him closer, trying to provide him with the natural heat of your body. He starts fiddling with your hair, groaning in what you assume to be both annoyance and pain every once in a while. His mouth is constantly hanging open, as he breathes heavily. He coughs a bit before talking. “My sister is coming over with medicine. I expect you to behave yourself.” When he commands you like that, that’s when you hate him most. That’s when the thought of running away while he is weak grabs hold of you. But then he scratches you so gently behind your ears and you nod, knowing why you stay. 

You’re codependent. You need him as much as he needs you. So, when there is a soft knock at the door you sneak away, trying not to wake him. He doesn’t seem to notice or even stirr in his sleep when you detach yourself and walk downstairs and to the front door. You open the front door gingerly, peeking through the little opening in the door. There is not one, but three people standing there with multiple bags. They seem harmless so you open the door fully, eyeing them. The tallest woman, who is insanely beautiful might you add, looks confused and so does the small cute woman too. There is a guy behind them, who almost shouts at you before you lunge at him, putting your hand on his mouth. You make a shushing motion, and he seems to understand as you detach yourself.

 “He is asleep.” You whisper, and they nod seeming to understand. You step aside and let them in. They look around the house and it’s clear they’ve never been here before, even back before you moved in. You wonder if these people even are related to Five at all, from them not looking alike either Five or each other. You lead them into the kitchen, closing the kitchen door to dampen the sound. They all look at you so suspiciously, you get self conscious. It’s just silent, before the tall woman takes the initiative and puts the bag she has on the kitchen table. “We brought stuff.” She just says. You nod, walking over and looking into the bag.

You start to put it away, a large arrangement of canned soup and such. After looking around for a second she starts to help you. The guy has already sat himself down at your kitchen table, eyeing you as you move. “What are you?” He asks, and the short girl next to him turns to him, flabbergasted. “Diego-” She starts, but is interrupted when he talks again. “What?” He snaps at her. You have no idea how to handle this amount of hostility. Five might be aggressive, but he never snapped at you for no reason. There’s a thick silence in the kitchen, but luckily you’re saved when you can hear Fives loud voice basically SCREAM your name throughout the house. They all flinch, but you just rush back into your bedroom. 

You throw yourself onto the bed, hugging him close. “I thought you left.” Is all he says, holding onto you tightly. “Why would she leave?” Someone says from the doorway and Five shoves you away, looking at the intruder. “Vanya.” He simply says, looking at her. You just now notice how miserable he actually looks. His eyes are half lidded and red, his mouth hanging open slightly as he tries to get as much air as possible. “Didn’t take you long.” He simply says. She smiles. “I brought company.” Five is quick to reply. “Please, I don’t want any medicine Klaus has touched.” She laughs. 

“You didn’t tell us you had company already,” The guy, Diego, says, shoving his way past Vanya and into the bedroom with you. You’re almost scared Five will disown you in front of them, knowing how much he does not like to show his care or affection. But all he does is look at him coldly. “It’s not just ‘company’, it’s my partner.” You hide a bit under the covers, trying not to meet their eyes as they all stare at you. “You’ve never said anything about that.” The tall lady says. For some reason they all seem to have some hostility to Five now. “He sneers. “It’s none of your business.” Diego is looking around suspiciously, touching random trinkets. Vanya seems more confused than she seems suspicious. “How is that none of our business? We’re your family.” 

Five seems too tired as he rolls his head. “Can we take this another time?” He says, starting to get out of bed. He’s still in his sleeping clothes. “I just think it’s weird.” Diego says. Five shoves them all aside as you follow him back to the kitchen where he grabs a bag of medicine. You can hear them discussing something in the bedroom. “They’re catching on quicker than I suspected. I might have to take you to meet them all to satisfy them to not look further into this, but I don’t know if I trust you.” He says, chucking a glass of water and some pills. Your face falls. He has never really acknowledged that he knows taking you and keeping you away from everything was bad. 

“Why not?” You ask, something breaking in your bedroom making you flinch. Five doesn’t seem at all surprised or bothered. You guess he knows his siblings well. “I’m not blind, sweetheart. I see the looks. I see how much you want to leave me.” He says, and even if he is right your heart breaks a little. Seeing only one person for so long, might have made you slightly attached. One might even suggest that you had come to love him. It’s hard to find the right words, as he looks so weak and stands only with the support of the kitchen cabinets. “I don’t want to leave you, Five. I just want to leave. I just want to go out there.” His look softens. This is probably the first real conversation you’ve had with him about this. At least without him getting angry with you.

“It’s dangerous out there.” You sigh, not wanting to push him too far. “Although, when I recover from this we will have to go see them. Maybe if you can handle that.. The grocery store won’t be too bad.” You smile, and can’t help it when you throw yourself at him, planting kiss after kiss all over his face. Then you rest your head in the crook of his neck. He smiles deviously, knowing that he has groomed you right. Soon your relationship might even become more normal. 

Or as normal as he will allow it, anyways. 

[mandoalorian]

Sugar and Spice [Maxwell Lord x Reader] - Chapter 5

Summary: When you are evicted from your apartment by your toxic ex boyfriend and have no place to go, who do you turn to? Alone in the city as the countdown to Christmas begins, you find yourself applying for a job as the assistant of the world’s biggest entrepreneur; Maxwell Lord. Little do you know, he has other intentions for you. No doubt about it, this Christmas will truly be like no other.

Word count: 2k

Warnings: Smut, mentions of a previous verbally abusive relationship, typical 80s misogyny (but very little of it), mentions of food and drink, alcohol consumption. This is a sugardaddy x sugarbaby fic soooo… a daddy k!nk too oops.

But in this chapter - Maxwell's mother is ~annoying~, general fluffiness and feelings.

Author’s note: OOOOH, it's starting to get interesting guys! More of Maxwell's mother… let me know what you think please! I hope you enjoy! 

MASTERLIST

PREVIOUS - CHAPTER FIVE - NEXT

You weren't sure what time it was when you woke up, but the beams of golden sunlight were already seeping through the curtains and, although quiet, you could hear some kind of commotion going on downstairs. The bed was amazing. It was so soft and warm, and enormous, so you were able to stretch your arms and legs out like a starfish. You couldn't help but smile when you remembered the night before; the restaurant, the signing of the contract and the amazing sex. You pursed your lips together and closed your eyes, hoping to get a few more hours of uninterrupted sleep.

Just then, you heard a crash and a yell and your eyes shot open. "Get out!" You heard Maxwell cry and you rubbed your eyes, feeling a confused but tired look wash over your face.

Another voice followed his; feminine but just as angered. It was incoherent to you, probably because it was mazed in between the many walls and rooms of his penthouse. You yawned and stumbled out of bed, still in your little black dress from the night before. You padded over to the mirror and checked your appearance. You hadn't been washed so your makeup was smudged and your hair was knotty. You didn't know who was downstairs but you didn't want to meet them in that dress. You walked into your en suite bathroom and splashed warm water over your face, taking some soap and begging to get washed. You considered getting a shower but you weren't exactly sure what the protocol right now was.

If he was your boyfriend, sure. You'd happily take a shower in his home. But then again, you'd also be sharing a bed with him. You found it difficult to understand why he didn't want to sleep with you after sex but you managed to brush of the feeling. It was your first time and maybe he wasn't used to the company. Nevertheless, it hurt. You wished it didn't hurt. You were his sugar baby and there was essentially no string attached; at least not ones of value and importance like of what a relationship might have.

You looked at yourself in the mirror, sighing at the way the dress slouched over your tired body in the morning. You ached to change into a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. Nevertheless Maxwell Lord was a bachelor and it would be incredibly unlikely to find any clothes of your size just lying about in his penthouse.

You quietly left the guest bedroom, walking down the hallway. You remembered that he had told you his own bedroom was just two doors down. You stood before the closed door and knocked on it gently, but there was no answer. You slowly and carefully opened it, without making a sound, and tiptoed in. It was empty, his bed was unmade, his clothes were scattered untididly on the floor. Okay… so he wasn't in his bedroom. You went to leave but something stopped you. When would you ever find yourself in Maxwell Lord's bedroom? Instead, you took a further step inside, your feet sinking into the plush carpet, a shut the door behind you.

His bedroom was magnificent— twice the size of the guest bedroom you had stayed in. You didn't know how it was possible but his bed was even bigger than yours. He had his own balcony, and other doors leading elsewhere into the penthouse. There were dressers and bookshelves embellished in gold and mirrors that fit the whole wall, although you were beginning to expect nothing less than extravagant from Maxwell Lord.

Nosily, you walked through his room, opening the two doors that were opposite you. One led into an en suite bathroom, and the other led into a walk in closet. You were quick to shut the bathroom door, not really having any interest in scoping out a rich man's bathroom, but you found yourself completely stunned when you pondered into the walk in closet. You smiled, sure you'd be able to find something in here to change into. By the looks of it, he had thousands of items of clothes. You took a closer look and noticed they had all been ordered by the name of the designer. You chuckled, shaking your head, thinking it was typical of a man like Max. You were almost certain you could find some kind of comfortable outfit to change into. You two had slept together— you doubted that he would care that you had stolen some of his clothes. You wondered how many other women had worse his clothes and your stomach churned at the thought.

You spent a long ten minutes raking through his closet. It couldn't be possible. Did this man seriously own no casual clothes? At this point, you just wanted to see Maxwell Lord in some sweats and a hoodie. You wanted to laugh, imagining the CEO dressed in such a way. He mustn't have known what comfort is. You pulled out an inconspicuous white shirt, which he had thousands of, and held it against your body in the mirror. Sliding off your dress, you put on his shirt, realising you were completely naked underneath. You grimaced, remembering that your panties were probably still in the conference room, absolutely ruined from your arousal. Luckily, the shirt hung down to just above your knees. Still, you felt uncomfortable meeting whoever was with Maxwell wearing no underwear. What were you going to do?

You decided to find out if Maxwell was more of a boxers or briefs type guy. You went through his drawers and picked out a pair of soft Calvin's, pulling them up your legs. You couldn't help but laugh when you saw yourself in the mirror. Talk about overstepping. Nevertheless you shook your head and with a walk of confidence, you padded into the kitchen.

"The president thinks you're going to be there, Maxwell. Are you crazy? You are not going to stand-up the president of our great country. It would embarrass me, but most of all it would embarrass your father. He'd be turning in his grave if he knew you planned on making a fool out of his business like that." A woman with tight blonde curls and a ruby red frown shouted. You froze at the door frame when you overheard the conversation.

Maxwell and the older lady turned to face you in unison. The lady looked horrified when she saw you, her hand clutching her heart dramatically. Maxwell opened and closed his mouth like a goldfish, his brown eyes wide as he took in your appearance. He thought you looked amazing, despite your tired eyes and messy hair. The way you looked in his shirt made him want to ravish you in that very moment. His heart was doing loopdaloops, racing wildly. He was softening for you.

"Oh-" you stammered out, raising both of your hands defensively. "I'm sorry, am I overstepping?" you asked, biting your lip.

"Overstepping into my son's closet, it looks like." Snarled the lady who you now identified as Maxwell's mother. You knew you recognised her from somewhere. It must've been from the painting in his office when you had first met him. "Maxwell, who on God's great planet is this whore you've picked up?" she spat, disgusted.

You knotted your eyebrows together and folded your arms across your chest. "What did you just call me?" you gritted out furiously.

When Maxwell sensed your anger he panicked and stood up. He knew better not to fight with his mother over her ingrained misogyny, but you didn't. "Ladies please." he said, trying to remain as calm as possible. He shot you an apologetic look. "Come sit with me, join me for breakfast." Maxwell pulled out the seat next to him and ushered you over. You sighed in defeat and sat next to him.

"Well?" Maxwell's mother found her hand on her hip as she stared you out.

"Well what?" Maxwell sighed, taking a sip of his black coffee and closing his newspaper.

"Who is she?" yelled his mother.

"Remember when you told me to stop fucking my assistants? Because they'd give me a lawsuit or whatever? Well, I hired someone. We went through a legal contract last night so she's not going to sue me, and then I let her stay the night." 

Maxwell Lord's mother looked at you like you had grown a second head. "What's going on exactly?" you leaned into Maxwell and whispered in his ear.

"Will talk about it later." he promised you.

Just then, Maxwell Lord's mother screamed. You stiffened up and turned to Maxwell, who looked like he was used to it. How could he be used to that screaming crazy bitch standing in his penthouse talking to him like that? You wanted to knock the pearl earrings out of her lobes. But hitting your boss’s mother might cost you your job.

"Don't get any foolish ideas Maxwell, she's not going to the Christmas gala!" his mother reprimanded with a warning tone. "Reagan's daughter, Margaret, has agreed to have drinks with you! Think about what a relationship with her could do for your company."

Maxwell scowled. "I have no interest in Margaret."

"Do you have interest in that little slut? Who steals your clothes and helps herself to your waffles?" You froze up, slowly removing your fingers from Maxwell's breakfast plate.

"I don't care if she eats my waffles! Please mother, just leave us alone. See yourself out." Maxwell sighed and you tried to stifle a laugh. You popped a blueberry in your mouth and she raised an eyebrow when she screamed again, stomping her heels and storming out of the apartment, slamming the door behind her.

You burst out into laughter. You couldn't hold it back anymore. Maxwell's head snapped in your direction and he shot you a confused glance. You pulled his plate and took his knife and fork before eating his waffles.

"Hey that's my breakfast!" he pointed his finger and you laughed harder. He couldn't help but smile. A genuine smile that was so rarely seen on Maxwell Lord.

"I thought you said you didn't mind if I ate your waffles," you said in between breaths of laughter. He rolled his eyes as you centred the plate, and both of you began to eat from it. "Your mother is batshit crazy." you told the businessman, licking the syrup from your lips.

"Yeah, I know," Maxwell ran a hand through his hair. "This is why I never invite girls to stay the night. She'll come over in the morning and scare them away."

"Well, it takes a lot to scare me." you smiled and his own smile only grew when he saw the way your eyes sparkled like diamonds.

In the silence, Maxwell wanted to tell you how beautiful you looked. He thought you couldn't look any more beautiful than you did last night in the black dress, but there was something so angelic about seeing you with no makeup on and wearing one of his shirts. He cleared his throat, opting against the gesture. There was no need for him to play up an unnecessary romance in this arrangement. He shook away his feelings and took another sip of his coffee.

"We're going shopping today." he told you matter of factly.

"We are?" you asked. "What for?"

"The gala." he flicked to the next page of his newspaper.

"Your mother made it quite clear I wasn't invited." you sighed.

Maxwell turned to you and placed a hand on your thigh. "Darling," he said, and your heart done an excited flip. "It's my gala. I want you by my side." he rubbed comforting circles into your skin before sliding his hand further up. He knotted his eyebrows together when his hands came up to his boxer shorts. He lifted the hem up of your shirt and saw you were wearing his Calvin's. His eyes widened.

"Oh- I can explain-" you chuckled awkwardly.

Maxwell shook his head and said your name, his voice stern. "It's fine, but I'm going to have to ask that you don't go into my bedroom without my permission."

You paused, feeling your cheeks heat up with embarrassment. It felt like he was hiding something from you. You sighed. Even if he was, it shouldn't matter to you. You were just an arrangement to him. The words stung as you recalled what he had said to you last night. A business deal.

"Okay." you replied, pushing the plate of breakfast away and standing up.

"Good girl." Maxwell smirked and you felt that familiar fire set alight in your stomach.

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[alpacaparkaseok]

Mine

13. Agust D

Genre: Min Yoongi x oc

Warnings: none

Word Count: 4.2k

I have a surprise for you guys in this chapter!!! 😊😊 Aaaaand we’re all set up and ready to go for the finale! 

2 Months Later

Anacortes, Washington, USA

The distant sound of a bell pulls me back to reality, and I turn to face the wind. Waves are pushing their way onto the shore, the choppy water fighting for my attention.

I watch as the ferry grows ever closer before putting my earbuds into my ears to answer my incoming phone call.

“Funny, I was just thinking about you,” I smile as I close my eyes.

“Really? What a coincidence. What are you up to right now?”

“Just about to board the ferry. You?”

“I’m going to head to bed soon.”

“Wow, so early. You’ve become so disciplined!”

Yoongi’s breathy laugh fills my ears and I can almost picture him rolling his eyes if I close my eyes tightly enough. “I’m assuming you’re not available to facetime?”

Frowning, I shake my head even though he can’t see me. “No, too many people around. You’ll just have to deal with the beautiful sound of my voice.”

“That’s what I was afraid of.”

It’s been two months since I last saw Yoongi outside of Bong-cha’s apartment. The chill that comes with currently residing in the northwestern United States is almost the same as I felt that morning when we said goodbye.

‘Young Rising’ came out just over a month ago, and it’s received a lot of success. Thankfully it was just enough to help me land a role that is already receiving speculation for possibly being a critically acclaimed role.

It wasn’t the one I originally wanted, that role went to Bryce Dallas Howard. I suppose I’ll have to try for a 1700’s romance some other time. This time around I get to play the daughter of one of the first lighthouse keepers in the United States and all the crazy events that unfold. It’s fun, and getting to take the ferry out to the San Juan islands here in the state of Washington is an added bonus.

My favorite part of the role? Every morning I get to sit here and watch the ocean and talk to Yoongi.

“Rude, but I’m not surprised. Isn’t it barely midnight there? You really are heading off to bed early.”

“Yeah, it’s midnight. What can I say? It was a long day and I’m exhausted.”

Now that I listen closer, I notice the hint of tiredness in his tone. “Why? What happened today?”

Yoongi sighs as I get up to board the ferry. Another great thing about being here in Washington? It’s cold and rainy enough that nobody bats an eye at me. I’m decked out in my raincoat and my beanie is pulled down low. During this time of year there aren’t many tourists either, so most mornings it’s just the ferryman and I. Today there are a couple of small groups milling about, though.

All the better. It gives me an excuse to not facetime Yoongi and have him laugh at my bundled up state. Which, for the record, he finds hilarious.

“Promise not to laugh?”

“Promise.”

There’s a second hesitation before he speaks up again. “I miss you.”

It’s a blow straight to the heart, and I cling to the railing so as to not fall overboard. We try not to dwell on our current state too much, things are complicated enough. Still, it’s nice to know that I’m not the only one struggling with this.

“Why would I laugh at that?”

“I don’t know, you like making fun of me and how weirdly sentimental I can get-”

“Soft. That’s the word you’re looking for.”

“...right. How could I forget.”

“I miss you too, Yoongs. A lot.”

It’s silent on the other end of the phone for a little while, so I just lean up against the railing and watch as the ferry begins to edge out to sea. Once again I close my eyes against the crashing waves and try to convince myself that I’m sitting in the genius lab or making a mess of things in the kitchen.

How could a span of less than a week affect me so much? It’s a question that I’ve come back to many times over the past couple of weeks. Occasionally I get a moment of understanding. Sometimes that understanding comes late at night as I cuddle up in bed, propping my phone up to chat with Yoongi as he sits at his desk in the genius lab and tells me about what he’s working on.

Just watching him mumble incoherent things under his breath and seeing his eyes flit back to his phone to check that I’m still there makes me realize that there’s so much going on here. So much going on whilst being so far apart.

At least the media frenzy has died down a bit. Sure, there’s still a lot of theories tumbling around, but the mobs of heartbroken fans seems to have lessened significantly.

“Are you sure that’s everything, though? What else have you got going on?”

“What, me missing you is not enough?”

I chuckle into the phone. “Nope.”

“Fine, you caught me. We’re finishing up the final touches on the mixtape and I always just get really stressed before a release, you know? Like you did the night before ‘Young Rising’ premiered?”

Shuddering at the memory I groan. “Ugh, don’t remind me. But what is it exactly about this mixtape that has you so nervous? I mean, this isn’t the first time you’ve released one. Maybe whatever helped you de-stress last time will help you this time around, too.”

There’s a long pause but I wait patiently for him to speak. The island is just coming into view now, I’ve probably got about fifteen more minutes before I’m officially on the clock and have to hang up.

I hate that part.

“I’m not so sure...it’s different this time around.”

I frown. “What’s so different? You’re even more loved?”

A wry laugh on his part. “No, not that. It’s just...this mixtape, these songs...they’re even more personal this time around. Sure, I’ve talked about some pretty personal things on my previous mixtapes, but this time around the entire mixtape is personal.”

That’s news to me. Ever since Yoongi changed the concept of the album he’s kept everything under lock and key. He told me he kept most of the tracks, ‘My First Mistake’ obviously being one of them. Other than that, though, I have no idea what to expect.

“Yoongs...I think that will make this mixtape your best one yet. Really. People will be able to relate to it, and they’ll love you even more for it. Just, get some sleep tonight. You’ve worked your hardest - don’t try to brush it all off, you’ve nearly worked yourself to the ground over this mixtape! - and that’s all you can do. I’m absolutely positive it’ll be great.”

“Thanks, Car. So what scenes are you doing today?”

We get lost in the conversation for the remainder of the ferry ride before suddenly the ferry is coming to a stop. I hurry off the boat, the tell-tale change of tone tipping Yoongi off to what I need to do.

“Talk to you later?”

“Yeah, sounds great. Get some sleep!”

Yoongi chuckles. “Will do. Have a great day.”

I sign off the phone and roll my shoulders. One of the producers, Melissa, is waiting for me in a little golf cart.

“Hey Cara, ready for the day?”

Grinning at her, I jump into the passenger seat. “Definitely.”

🌙

It’s the middle of the night when I’m awoken from my slumber, and I groan as I contemplate just turning my phone off. It was a late night, I’ve probably only been asleep for a couple of hours at this point.

When I see who’s calling, though, I pick up.

“Bong-cha?” I ask blearily. “What’s up?”

“Have you listened to it yet?!”

I hiss as Bong-cha screams into my ear. “What are you talking about? Did you and Jimin finally kiss or something?”

“No, you idiot. Yoongi’s mixtape!”

My eyes widen and suddenly I’m completely awake. “His mixtape? I-it’s out? When?”

“It just dropped like an hour ago! Didn’t he tell you? I mean, I get that he wanted to surprise everybody, but I thought he’d at least tell you.”

I’m already on my music app, searching for Agust D. When I finally hit search, I scream involuntarily.

“That little punk! He didn’t even tell me!”

“Wait, Cara!”

“What?”

“Just, listen to it.”

“That’s what I’m trying to do, weirdo.”

“No, but really listen to it. I mean, it’s about you.”

My chest stops rising as my air gets cut off. “What do you mean it’s about me? We already knew about ‘My First Mistake’-”

“No, not just that track. I mean it’s all about you. Just look at the name of it! Isn’t it a little weird that he didn’t stick to his m.o. and title it ‘D-3’?”

I was in such a rush to click on his profile that I didn’t even bother to look at the title. When I do, I come gasping up for air.

Mine.

Written there in big, bold letters is the word mine.

“That doesn’t mean any-”

“Nuh-uh, you listen to the mixtape and then we’ll hash out the details. Got it?”

“Fine. Call you in the morning?”

“Isn’t it already morning for you?”

“Yeah, 4!”

“Right. Yeah, call me later.”

Clicking off the call, I take a deep breath to steel myself before clicking on the album. 8 tracks stare back up at me, most of them I recognize from that first night in the genius lab. The leading track is ‘My First Mistake’, which makes me smile. When my eyes trail down to the final song, I can’t help but click on it.

My Last Mistake. Turning the volume up, I sit back against my headboard and listen. And then, note by note, I fall under his spell.

Yoongi’s heartbroken voice talks about details of his life, how he goes by many names. The world knows him by Suga. His true fans know his other name, August D. Min Yoongi controls the strings of those two personas. A heavy beat pounds out the words alongside him.

Then the music slows, becomes calmer. Clearer.

In the most tormented voice he can manage, Yoongi talks about a girl that called him Yoongs. He talks about a girl driving under the stars that called him Yoongs and how in that moment, he decided that none of the other names mattered anymore, just so long as he could hear her say it one more time.

As the song falls from its crescendo, Yoongi brings up his last mistake.

“What’s your last mistake, Yoongs?” I whisper, hoping for an answer.

He answers it a moment later, the same melody from ‘My First Mistake’ being played out, only this time it’s on the guitar rather than the piano.

He’s reminded of his last mistake every time a plane flies overhead and he can’t run fast enough to catch it.

🌙

The entire mixtape is hauntingly beautiful.

As I finish listening to “Naksan”, a song set Naksan park, and what I assume to be the gazebo that overlooked Seoul, I lean my head back and sigh.

There is so much we don’t say. There is so much that Yoongi has never said, but now I’m beginning to realize why he was so nervous about this mixtape.

Here, crammed into these eight songs that talk about everything from t-shirts to being oceans apart, Yoongi says everything he never could before. It’s obvious, painfully so. He didn’t try to cover anything up.

I am so dead.

Yet, I can’t find it in myself to care. The only thing I wish I could do right now is show up at his apartment and sit down on his couch. Maybe eat some food, and watch as he fumbles for an explanation to this mixtape that is no longer a mixtape but more a cry out into the void.

And of course, don’t even get me started on the title track. The song that the album is named after, “Mine”.

In it Yoongi recalls his dreams of having a big car and house, and how he gets to call all those things his now. He has it all, essentially. And yet, the one thing he wants more than anything is far from him.

‘I have it all, I hear them say it. I have it all, they chant over again. When will they realize that it means nothing to me, if I can’t call you mine?’

Dragging myself to check Twitter, I see what the number one trending topic is right now.

#Mine

And in second place?

#CaraisMine

Somehow, I can never quite make it to first place. How disappointing.

Groaning as I realize that the sun is about to come up, I linger over Yoongi’s contact information.

One call. That’s all it would take. A single phone call, and maybe everything would change. But what would I even say?

Hi, it’s the girl that’s ridiculously in love with you. Do you feel the same way? Great! Let’s end our careers and live in Fiji!

As enticing as that sounds as I watch the rain pouring down, I know that it’s unrealistic. I’m here, caught up in some strange, long-distance relationship that’s technically not a relationship.

And Yoongi’s there, hopefully receiving all the praise he deserves for coming out with yet another great mixtape.

So I just let the dim light from my phone fade out before slipping back down under the covers. I know what Yoong is thinking now.

Ball’s in my court. But how on earth do I return it?

🌙

Seoul, South Korea

“And she still hasn’t said anything about it?”

Yoongi knows that Taehyung is trying really hard to understand his current predicament, but if he asks him if he’s heard from Cara one more time, he’s going to lose his mind.

“No.”

“Have you reached out to her?”

“No.”

“Why not?”

Sighing, Yoongi rubs his hands over his face. “First, because it’s only 8 o’clock in the morning over there. Second, I basically just told the world about my feelings for her, I think I can give her a little space to breathe before jumping on her.”

Taehyung plops down beside Yoongi, his eyes wide. “You’re really stressed, aren’t you?”

Somehow the question makes Yoongi laugh. “You think?” He feels restless; he has for the past two months. He thought releasing the mixtape would diminish that feeling, but instead it’s been heightened to the point that he can’t hardly sit still anymore.

Which is saying a lot, because Yoongi loves sitting still.

“Hyung?”

“Hm.”

“I think you should borrow my car and go for a drive or something. Just get out for a while. You’ve been cooped up in this studio for weeks; it’s messing with your head.”

Sometimes Yoongi forgets how much everyone cares about him. It’s in times like these that he remembers. Without saying much else he takes Taehyung’s keys that he extends to him and heads out.

When he gets into the car, he doesn’t know where he’s going. His mind is filled with worry and doubts and worst of all, regret. Was he too blind in his feelings that he overlooked Cara’s? After all, maybe she’s listening to the mixtape right this very moment and wondering why he would write something like this.

Maybe she hasn’t called him yet because she’s trying to come up with a way to let him down easy.

Yoongi drives and drives, turning up the music so as to drown out the thoughts in his head. He drives on and on, clueless to the fact that it’s the middle of the night and he should really be heading back to the apartment now.

When he parks before a lit path that leads up, Yoongi realizes that his body knew this entire time where he was going.

Without questioning it further, he hops out of the car and shrugs on his coat and mask. It’s late enough that hopefully most people will have had the sense to go home.

As Yoongi climbs up the path he only passes a couple of people; a couple that are too tangled up in each other’s embrace to even notice him. The path continues ever upward until he’s panting, but he’s grateful for the burn in his lungs. For a brief moment, his mind isn’t consumed by the what ifs of his current situation.

As Yoongi clears the final steps, his gaze immediately turns to the gazebo just down a ways. It’s the same as before, the night a similar one to that night when he watched Cara from afar before mustering up the courage to go talk to her.

Tonight there is one major difference. As Yoongi edges closer, there’s a tightness in his chest. There’s some part of him that half-expects Cara to appear, leaning up against one of the pillars and looking out at the city.

As Yoongi steps into the gazebo, that wish vanishes into thin air.

It’s empty.

Cara is not here. Yoongi is, though. Which has proved to be the most miserable thing in the world over the past two months. Cara is gone, but somehow Yoongi is still here and seeing her everywhere he goes.

The songwriting and production process is enough to make anyone go a little insane. Usually, once the project is finished, Yoongi feels like he can finally breathe again. He’s able to enjoy the fruits of his labors.

Not tonight.

At first he laughed at himself, back when he’d first started learning about Cara from Bong-cha and curiosity overcame him. He thought it was silly of him to want to learn everything about her and what it was that made her tick. There was just something about her that made Yoongi dive right in.

Of course, the boys had noticed. Even Bong-cha, who hadn’t known him for very long, had noticed the difference Cara had made. That was before they even met. Before any of this had even started.

Yoongi knows his place. His place as one of the most famous stars in the world, his place in the group’s dynamic, his place among his family. His place among ARMY. Yet, when he met Cara, it was like the ground disappeared under his feet and he’s been falling ever since.

He used to come to Naksan park often and just think. He’s not one for hiking around outdoors, but something about the view and the beautiful architecture of the gazebo and old city walls that line the path have helped him think.

He used to stand where Cara stood, and think about everything. However there was one topic that he tried to avoid at all costs: love. It wasn’t because he didn’t believe in love or didn't want it; if he’s learned anything from his time with ARMY he’s learned about love. But there was always this giant, impenetrable wall that stood between him and love.

Yoongi knows his place, and because of that clear role he has also always known that him falling in love with someone other than his fans was off the table.

That night when he came to meet Cara, he was coming to tell her just that. He was coming to tell her that he was a horrible human being that was dangerously close to breaking that unspoken rule, and he needed to mark a clear line in the sand. Friends, he had thought We can still be friends.

Yet, as he’d watched Cara head to the same spot; the same pillar he had frequented so many times, his words had gotten caught in his throat. She’d looked out over the city and Yoongi would have given anything to know what she was thinking.

Instead, he’d just asked for what so many people had been unable to give him throughout his career.

Just someone to sit in silence with.

No demands, no questions, just be together.

And as Yoongi sat swimming in his feelings, Cara’s head resting on his shoulder, he learned something about himself.

Yoongi had avoided the topic of love for so long not because he didn’t think it was appropriate for his lifestyle, but because he’d known deep down that the chances of him finding someone he was willing give everything up for were nearly nonexistent.

Cara’s hand was wrapped up in his, sharing his pocket. Quiet breathing, feeling warm despite the oppressing chill. No demanding answers, just sitting together.

He had realized that while he was looking for someone to convince him to leave everything behind, he was sitting beside someone that already understood. Someone that would never tell him to abandon it all just to be together.

He was sitting beside someone that might just be open to the possibility of being together, and would be open to the chaos that would ensue. There was no need to change everything to be together, but there would be the need to fight for that privilege of calling Cara his.

As Yoongi now steps into the gazebo and rests on the bench opposite from where they had sat, he remembers when it all started.

The night after he’d watched ‘Under Nine’, he’d felt restless and wandered up here. It was the first time in over a year that he’d come here. He knew why he didn’t bother to anymore; he didn’t feel inspired anymore when he looked out over the city.

Yoongi had seen the world, and he’d fallen out of love with it.

It was a horrible, lying, cheating thing. He’d seen too much suffering, fought so hard against it just to see evil rise up again and again.

Yet when he came up here that night after watching Cara on screen and seeing that humanity can be beautiful even in all its flaws, something amazing had happened.  

He looked out over the city, and a little spark had jumped up in his heart. That night, Yoongi looked out over the world, and began to fall in love again.

Yoongi has never been very confrontational. Some may think he is simply due to his status as a rapper, but that’s never been the case. However, he is known for his undeniable work ethic. For his unending effort to obtain what he thinks he deserves.

When Yoongi placed a letter into the mail a few days ago, he was reminded of why he was going to do everything in his power to make this work.

When he looked at Cara, he thought that she deserved a chance at love, too.

Giving one last look out at the city, Yoongi gets up and stretches. There are a lot of uncertainties swirling about right now, but there is one thing he is completely certain of.

He is going to do everything in his power to give him and Cara a chance.

🌙

Anacortes, Washington, USA

I have mail.

It’s the first time in a long time that I’ve gotten mail, but I can’t fight the feeling of dread as I wonder if the awkward pleas from fans are about to start up again. There’s a single envelope addressed to me sitting on the ground in front of my hotel door, which I scoop up before heading back inside.

No work today; we’ll be taking a two week break to wait out the rainy season before picking things back up again. I’m grateful for the small reprieve, I would much rather stay cuddled up in my blankets today while I try to wrap my mind around everything.

I haven’t reached out to Yoongi yet. Granted, it’s only 10 am, but I still feel a little guilty. I just want to make sure I have my thoughts in order before I freak out, you know? After all, there’s still a chance the mixtape being about me is just a coincidence...right?

Stacey, my PR rep, just got off the phone with me. Nobody really knows where I am right now, which is good. There are perks to being holed up in a small town in the northwestern United States.

She gave me an earful on how many calls she’s received over the course of the last few hours from various magazines and gossip collectors. When she asked me if there was a statement she would like for me to relay, I blanked. Stacey just laughed and said she’d come up with some vague for the time being.

My attention returns to the item in my hand. Cautiously opening up the letter, my brows furrow as I take out a small slip of paper and a piece of thick cardstock.

Cara,

Hopefully this gets to you when it’s supposed to. I thought of just sending you an email but that seemed to detract from what I was going for. You understand, don’t you? When you told me about your break from work, I managed to pull some strings. Follow the directions on the back of this letter, I’ll be waiting for you. And no, I can’t do this over the phone. It’s an ‘in-person’ kind of thing.

Yours,

Yoongs

Flipping the letter over I frown when the directions are in French. Then, scrambling for the cardstock, my mouth drops open as I see just what Yoongi is talking about.

One boarding ticket for tomorrow morning, leaving at 10am.

Destination?

Paris.

Previous - Next

only one chapter left! 💛💛

taglist: @eusticenatalie @agustneeds​ @prdshobi​ @oceandeep​ @taylorroe3​ @dreamcatcherjiah​

[simplybakugou]

Shut Up and Kiss Me

↝ Working side-by-side, Bakugou felt himself become encaptivated by you the more he spent time with you. After a failure of a first date, he can’t help but be drawn to you even more under the unruly night sky.

PROMPT: “Can I kiss you?”

⋆ PAIRING: prohero!bakugou x female!reader ⋆ WARNINGS/TAGS: swearing ⋆ WORD COUNT: 5019

A/N: Here’s my submission for the @bnhabookclub​ event! I changed the prompt a little to “I wanna kiss you” to fit Bakugou’s character a little more. Here’s the link to the event!

✐posted 05.16.2020✐

Bakugou, one of the most self-assured pro heroes in the world had never felt so emotionally flustered until he met you. He always found himself observing you whenever you were at the agency, even if it was rare that the two of you were in the building at the same time. You were a rookie hero who was excited as well as determined to make your way to the top. You had a strong quirk and if there’s anything Bakugou recognized, it was a suitable rival. Through numerous training sessions and working your ass off, you slowly climbed up the rankings and eventually became the number two hero, working at the same agency, one that Bakugou owned himself. 

On that particular day, Bakugou had finished a mission earlier than expected, luckily dodging any reporters who always invaded his personal space and pissed him off. He had gone back to his agency, wanting to change out of his hunk of metal of a costume and return home to get some rest. He couldn’t ignore the disappointment he felt when he scanned the room and didn’t see you around.

Nonetheless, he continued walking down the street, thankful that his agency wasn’t located in a socially attractive area like other top notch agencies. As he turned down the street, something caught his eye and he couldn’t help but stare at the sight. 

There you were on the corner of the intersection, looking practically unrecognizable. Bakugou had never seen you without your hero costume on, usually ending up as a sweaty mess with your hair tousled and your costume ripped and torn at times. But there you were in a dress and heels, makeup perfectly painted onto your skin, and your hair pinned neatly. You were practically radiating an aura that commanded everyone to have their attention drawn to you. Bakugou never really cared about looks but seeing you now looking more beautiful than any person he had ever seen, he couldn’t help but stare. 

With looking so stunning, that aura of yours attracted the attention of others other than Bakugou. He felt his fists tighten when from across the street as he was waiting for the light to change, a grubby man approached you, smirking as he looked down at you. 

“I’ve never seen such a pretty little lady in these parts of town.” He grinned even wider at you. Even passerbys couldn’t recognize you without your costume.

You rolled your eyes, ignoring him. “Get lost, dickwad.”

The man narrowed his eyes at you, reaching down to feel you up. Right as Bakugou felt his body move towards you instinctively to help you, you turned around, twisting the man’s wrist in your own. The impact sent him falling down, hitting his head on the stop sign behind him. Bakugou couldn’t help but laugh, feeling a sense of relief knowing you were strong on your own, not having to rely on anyone to protect yourself. 

As you began crossing the street, Bakugou absentmindedly crossed the other way, not wanting to run into you. He didn’t understand why at first but he didn’t want you to know that he was watching you. He saw that you were heading towards the agency and he began going through the shortcut that he often would go through if the press would hover outside of the building at times. Bakugou was able to get to the building before you did and he let out a sigh of relief, beginning to unlatch the gauntlets around his wrists. 

“Hey, Ground Zero, great work out there today,” Haru, one of the secretaries from the front desk stated.

Bakugou nodded in response, moving to the back to quickly change out of his hero costume. He wanted to leave immediately and not have to run into you on the way here. He began to recall the way you were dressed and how you looked, closing the door behind him to not only change out of his costume but also hide the blush that was evident on his cheeks.

A few moments later, you pushed open the doors to the building, going towards the front desk. Haru looked up, surprised that you were here so abruptly as well as your change in attire. “(H/N), what’re you doing here? It’s your day off.”

You sighed. “I know. But I’m bored out of my mind so please give me work to do.”

The other receptionist, Aiko, looked you up and down with a grin. “Ooh, I see someone’s all dressed up! Did you go on a date? Was that why you wanted a day off?”

You rolled your eyes at her. “No, my mom made me go to some shitty brunch with her boyfriend’s family. They’re all pestering me so I got out of there and now I have nothing to do.”

“I can go through some reports and see what you can do,” Aiko said with a wink and you thanked her.

“Man, can’t believe our two biggest heroes are in the building. You guys are usually never here at the same time,” Haru commented, looking at you in awe.

You raised your brows, perking up immediately. “Ground Zero’s here?”

Haru nodded, pointing down the hall. “He’s in the back.”

You smirked, pulling out your phone and typing something in your web browser as you made your way to the back. You pushed open the door without any warning and Bakugou, who was in the midst of changing his pants, was taken aback, his face burning up as you stared at his half naked body. Only his briefs were covering him and he held his pants up to shield his legs from your eyes. “What the fuck?!”

“Just wanted to pop in and say ‘hello.’ And to show you this.” You held your phone up to an article covering your new ranking. “I’m in second place now. So just you wait; I’ll be number one soon enough!”

You slammed the door behind you as you made your own dramatic exit, leaving Bakugou utterly speechless and stunned. Just when he believed he couldn���t be more intrigued, you proved him wrong once again. You reignited his burning desire to be the best, wanting to show you exactly why he was the number one hero in the first place.

Since that day, you worked twice as hard as you did before and with your handwork, Bakugou wasn’t going to let you beat him so easily. He had to make sure to work twice as hard as you did, ultimately leading to him staying on top. As time progressed, you were often asked to accompany Bakugou on various missions and with the time the two of you spent together, you became close. 

“I can’t believe I’m still ranked number two,” you grunted in annoyance as you walked with Bakugou side by side back to the agency.

Bakugou smirked. “Hah, like I was just gonna let you surpass me without a fight. Dream on.”

You sighed, crossing your arms over your chest and pushed open the large glass doors. Bakugou made his way all the way to the back like he usually did while you stood in front of Aiko’s desk, pouting profusely.

Aiko snickered, recognizing that look of defeat on your face. “Let me guess: the rankings came out and you’re still number two?”

You clenched your fists, slamming them on the counter in frustration. “He’s just too damn good! I don’t know how to beat him!”

“Come on, you can’t tell me you thought it would be easy, right?” Aiko sneered playfully. “He does work with you, too.” You stuck your tongue out at her as she got up to go to the filing cabinet. 

“(H/N)? Could you fill out a report from today’s patrol?” Haru asked in a tone lower than normal.

“Sure!” You said, grabbing the clipboard from him and filling it out on the counter in front of his desk. Being drawn to your work, you didn’t notice Haru fidgeting in his seat as he took shy glances at you. Although you weren’t aware of it, Bakugou sure was as he came out of the back room, glaring at Haru from a distance as he looked at you nervously.

“(H/N), I was wondering if you were busy this weekend?” Haru asked, rubbing the nape of his neck as he began to sweat apprehensively. 

You looked up as you were writing, tapping the ballpoint pen against your chin as you began to think. “Hm, I’m pretty sure I have Saturday off and I’ve got nothing to do. Why’d you ask?”

Haru let out an anxious laugh. “Oh, you know, I was wondering if you wanted to go out--”

“She’s going out with me,” Bakugou butted in, leaning down on the counter in front of Haru’s desk, a frown printed on his lips. 

“I am?” You asked in confusion in unison with Haru’s, “She is?”

“You’re gonna have to try another day ‘cause she’s all mine Saturday,” Bakugou grumbled, loud enough for you and Haru to hear. He pushed open the glass doors in aggravation, mumbling incoherently under his breath as he left. 

You stood stunned as you watched his figure become smaller and smaller. Haru snapped you away from your thoughts, whispering, “So are you really going out with Ground Zero?”

“Hm?” You turned your head to face him, smiling widely. Seeing as his social skills were pretty low to begin with, you were intrigued with the thought of spending time with Bakugou outside of the work setting. “Yeah, it sounds fun! It’s not everyday I get to go out with Bakugou instead of Ground Zero!”

***

Bakugou never knew the day would actually come where he would be able to take you out. Despite being the proud man he was for everything hero related, he was hesitant to approach you with the intention of taking you out. And now the time had arrived where Bakugou, in his own unique way, managed to ask you out. 

However, Bakugou had no idea where to start planning a first date. His friends, specifically Kaminari, Kirishima, and Sero gave him different ideas, ultimately not being helpful at all for Bakugou. In the end, he decided to make his own plan, no matter how shitty it may end up being. The most difficult part about all this was that Bakugou didn’t really know much about you, having to rely on the help of Mina as she was a woman herself and had the most insight out of his friends. With her help, Bakugou based his planning on Mina’s interests.

Bakugou started off the date with dinner at a restaurant, a recommendation made by Mina herself. However, to Bakugou’s disappointment, the food was probably one of the worst things you’ve ever consumed in your life. Despite this, you didn’t want to be rude or make Bakugou upset by addressing the awful food. Bakugou knew you were just trying to be nice and nevertheless, he didn’t want this to ruin your evening. He strived to redeem himself with the rest of the night.

“What movie are we watching again?” You asked as Bakugou handed you your ticket.

“Some rom-com. I wasn’t sure about which movie you would wanna watch so I guessed and chose one.” Bakugou shrugged. In actuality, Mina had been talking nonstop about this movie and had begged Bakugou to show you it, guaranteeing that you would love it. He didn’t want to admit that he had Mina help him out to plan this date since he had no idea what to do.

You and Bakugou gave in your tickets and went into the theater you were instructed to enter. As you chose and sat in your seats, the screen began changing to the title sequence of the movie.

As the movie continued into the last quarter, Bakugou couldn’t help but feel bored out of his mind. Everything about the movie was awful: the cinematography, the directing, the acting… it was simply a shitshow. Finally, the movie had come to an end and so was Bakugou’s misery as he forced himself to sit and watch the movie in its entirety instead of running out and hiding in the bathroom. The two of you got up, making your way out of the theater.

“How was it?” Bakugou asked, throwing out the empty bucket of popcorn.

If possible, you actually hated the movie more than Bakugou did. But similarly to the dinner, you didn’t want to hurt his feelings, especially since he planned out this whole evening. “It was… good.”

Bakugou sighed. He knew that you were just trying to spare his feelings but he didn’t want to call you out either. The one time he actually plans something like this out and it completely blew up in his face. You smiled sympathetically at him, throwing your empty buckets of popcorn out as you exited the theater. It was evident that Bakugou, who was quite obviously talented in other areas, was lacking experience in planning an amazing night out for a date.

As if the night couldn’t get any worse, the minute the two of you stepped outside, you heard numerous screams from a few blocks down. Low and behold, a giant rock-type villain was attempting to rob a bank and even had hostages in both of his hands.

“We can never just get a fucking day off,” Bakugou muttered. 

You chuckled and the two of you began making your way towards the site, running in the direction of the chaos without a second thought. You threw your shoes off to the side, cursing at yourself mentally for deciding on wearing a skirt and heels. But you couldn’t help yourself; you wanted Bakugou to see you on a day that you weren’t a sweaty mess. To your misfortune, it seemed that your perfectly pinned hair and makeup would be ruined within a few minutes.

Bakugou didn’t hesitate to maneuver himself towards the villain using his quirk for mobility and sending a blast to his face. The villain screamed, letting go of the hostages as he began wailing and covering his eyes. You jumped up and caught both hostages, safely setting them down to the ground.

They looked up at you in awe, two teenage girls who had met their first pro hero. “Thank you, (H/N)!”

“Don’t mention it! Now get back before you get hurt!” You called out as you maneuvered your body upwards using your quirk.

“Get behind him!” Bakugou yelled towards you. You nodded and moved to the villain’s blindspot, Bakugou following suit. The two of you sent blasts at his neck, causing him to fall onto his face with a thud. You held down one of his arms and Bakugou held the other, waiting for the police to arrive. The small crowd that was watching in awe began to cheer and clap, all of them getting excited to have gotten the chance to see the top two heroes in action. Truth be told, after spending numerous missions with him, you began to understand Bakugou’s fighting style and incorporated your own moves to suit his as well and he did the same, too. Alone, you were both strong in your own ways and can manage yourselves efficiently. But together, you were a force to be reckoned with.

Finally the cops showed up, piling out of the cars and taking the villain into custody. They thanked you and Bakugou repeatedly and you returned their thanks while Bakugou watched as they took care of the villain. You waved at the crowd as Bakugou started walking in the opposite direction of the crowd, patiently waiting for you to follow. You caught up with him, letting out a sigh once you were away from the commotion.

“It’s too bad tonight didn’t go like we wanted,” you said, frowning at the state of your now tattered clothes. You could already feel your makeup being smudged and your hair tousled, not bothering to fix it now. The pain in the soles of your feet only increasing with every step you took with your bare feet. You could even feel bits of gravel stabbing at your heels.

Bakugou paid no attention to his own attire, taking off his button down due to the various rips and tears and sticking to his black tank top underneath his clothes. “Even if that villain didn’t show up, tonight was still a fucking shitshow.”

He glanced down at your bare feet and bent over to remove his own sneakers. You shook your head. “No it wasn’t! I mean the food could’ve been better and the movie wasn’t as good as we expected but I still had a great time!” 

Finally taking notice of his removing his shoes, you rose a curious brow at him. “What’re you doing?”

Bakugou scoffed, shoving his sneakers into your hands and started making his way towards your apartment where he had picked you up from when the night started. “You think you can walk home fucking barefoot?”

You let out a small smile, thanking him as you bent over to slip his shoes on. Although they were obviously large and difficult to walk in, it was better than walking without any material protecting your feet. You caught up to him as Bakugou shoved his hands into his pockets. “Plus you don’t have to spare my feelings. There’s no point in lying, I know that tonight was a fucking mess.”

You looked towards him as he had his signature frown etched onto his face. “It doesn’t matter what we do. I always have a great time when I’m with you, Bakugou.”

Bakugou felt a tug in his chest as he glanced over at you, looking away immediately once making contact with your (E/C) eyes. You laughed at his reaction, taking notice to the slight pink tinting of his cheeks. “It’s still weird for me to not call you ‘Ground Zero.’ I mean, you’re still my boss technically.”

“We’re co-workers, I’m not your boss,” Bakugou insisted. “It’d be weird for a boss to be going out with his employee.”

“Either way, it’s odd, but just because we’re heroes doesn’t mean we can’t be friendly.” You glanced over in his direction, watching as he continued to trudge down the path towards your apartment. He could feel your eyes on him, not wanting to acknowledge them as he felt himself grow nervous under your intense gaze. “Speaking of, why did you become a hero?”

“Simple,” Bakugou started, “I wanted to become the best, the indisputable best.” He glanced over to you, smirking. “And I’m gonna keep it that way.”

You rolled your eyes at him. “We’ll see about that.”

“And you?”

“Why I wanted to become a hero?” You reiterated, Bakugou nodding as the two of you turned the corner. “I’ve never really told anyone this but to make it straightforward, my sister was hurt in an altercation with a villain when we were kids. She wasn’t hurt too bad but she was hospitalized for a few weeks. Ever since then, I’ve vowed to save as many people as I can, sort of like I’m trying to compensate for not being able to save her all those years ago.”

Bakugou glimpsed at you, his attraction towards you only increasing with this new found information. Although his desire for becoming a hero seemed subpar compared to yours, he admired you even more than he already did for taking a situation that wasn’t even your fault and turning it into your driving force for your profession.

“And now you’ve saved more people than any other hero,” Bakugou said.

You shrugged. “I’m trying to at least.” 

The conversation took a turn as you continued to talk about your personal lives, getting to know Bakugou in a different light. It was odd to see him talk about himself in a manner that wasn’t related to heroism. You had grown accustomed to hearing the various news stories about the brash number one hero that wasn’t as kind-hearted or catered for the crowds like All Might or other previous pro heroes but you never really cared for that. Being a pro hero wasn’t about one’s ability to present themselves in an attempt for the general public or media to like them but to use their quirks to help and protect as many people as they can. And Bakugou has done just that, protecting and saving people left and right without looking for any critical acclaim from anyone. 

He really was the indisputable best. 

The walk to your apartment finally came to a close as you stood in front of your complex, turning to face Bakugou. “I know you think that today was shitty but I don’t think it was at all. And I mean that.”

Bakugou scoffed. “Whatever. You can say that shit all you want, but I know how today went.”

You chuckled, shaking your head at his stubbornness. “I just liked getting to know more about Bakugou. Ground Zero’s cool and all but Bakugou’s pretty interesting if you ask me.”

You slipped his sneakers off, raising them up in front of them. “Thank you for these. I know most people say that you’re an asshole or they say all this crap about you being inconsiderate but I think tonight showed me that you’re actually a sweet guy. I think I’m liking Bakugou Katsuki more and more.”

Bakugou felt his face heat up, looking off to the side in an attempt to not let you acknowledge his blushing as he took his shoes from you. “Shut up, don’t say dumb shit like that.” He turned around, feeling like he would explode if he saw you for more moments than he already had. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

You laughed again, waving as he knelt down and slipped his shoes back on and began to walk away from the building. You couldn’t help but watch on as his figure grew smaller and smaller, finally deciding to go inside once he turned the corner. A sigh you didn’t know you were holding in escaped your lips, your feet aching from the momentary period of time spent running after the villain barefoot. Ignoring the pain, you made your way to the bathroom, frowning at the sight of your physical appearance. Just as you predicted, your hair and makeup were a mess, streaks of black blotting around your eyes and locks of hair knotted together as your neatly pinned hair had fallen apart. Your clothes that you had spent so much time figuring out were a tattered mess and you felt slightly embarrassed for a moment for looking like this in front of Bakugou. But that embarrassment dissipated as quickly as it came as you knew Bakugou has probably seen you looking like a sweaty mess more than he has seen your appearance on your best day.

You removed your makeup with a wipe and let your hair loose, the locks cascading down your shoulders. Just as you changed out of your clothes into something more comfortable, the sound on rain droplets pelting your windows echoed from the outside. Within a few minutes a downpour hit the city and you sighed, thankful that you had gotten inside before getting caught in the mess outside.

That was when you realized that Bakugou was still outside, on his way to his own house. He was also most likely getting drenched. Without thinking twice, you grabbed two umbrellas and ran out in an attempt to spare Bakugou from the harsh weather.

***

Bakugou’s phone began to buzz in his pocket, groaning incoherently as he saw Mina’s name on the screen requesting for a video call. He answered it begrudgingly, Mina, Sero, Kirishima, and Kaminari’s faces popping up on the screen.

“Well if it isn’t the romance master himself,” Kaminari teased.

Bakugou rolled his eyes at him. “If you idiots are here to just fucking make fun of me, I’m gonna hang up.”

“No!” Mina called out. “I just wanted to know how it went. Did my suggestions help?”

“No they fucking backfired on me,” Bakugou huffed. “The food tasted like fucking cardboard, the movie was the shittiest thing I’ve ever seen, and to top it all off, a villain popped up outta nowhere and fucked everything up even more. I just walked her home and now I’m going home.”

Mina frowned. “I’m sorry it didn’t work out well, I really tried hard to help you out!”

Kirishima patted her shoulder. “I’m sure it’s not your fault, and Bakugou and (H/N) just don’t have the same tastes as you do. But cheer up, man, I’m sure she had a good time.”

“Yeah, (H/N) seems like a chill girl,” Sero added.

“Whatever,” Bakugou let out a sigh, “I’m just glad it’s over. I didn’t wanna embarrass myself more than I already did.”

His friends said goodbye, trying their best to cheer him up before he hung up and shoved his phone back into his pockets. Bakugou felt defeated, not knowing how to rightfully come across with his feelings without being too direct. You were the only person he’d ever met that caught his attention immediately after the first encounter. Since the beginning, he found himself wanting to spend more time with you but after spending time with you outside of work, he was afraid that you wouldn’t want to be around him after the failure of a first date. Despite hearing you say how much you enjoy being around him and how you didn’t care what it was you were doing with him, Bakugou couldn’t help but feel as if you were only saying those things to make him feel better. He felt like he failed you.

Before Bakugou could even think about other ways the night could get worse, a drop of water pelted his nose. He looked up at the gray sky, the clouds rumbling as the water droplets increased in size, speed, and amount as it started pouring. This is just fucking great…

Bakugou didn’t bother running or seeking shelter as he was drenched in a matter of minutes. He was only a few blocks from his house and just as he was about to turn the corner again, Bakugou stopped at the sound of his name being called. He spun around, bewildered at the sight of you running towards him with an umbrella over your head and another opened in your other hand. 

Once you caught up to him, you raised one of the umbrellas over his head, breathing heavily to attempt to catch your breath.

“(H/N)…” Bakugou muttered, still in shock to see you again so soon. “What the hell are you doing here?”

“I saw that it started pouring and I just thought about how you didn’t have an umbrella so…” Your voice drifted off, gesturing to the umbrella.

“You didn’t have to…” Bakugou mumbled and you laughed.

“I came because I wanted to. And because I wanted to tell you again that I really did enjoy tonight.” You smiled. “Knowing you, you’re probably beating yourself up over dinner, the movie, and not to mention that villain showing up, but I don’t care what we do. I like being with you, no matter where we are.”

Bakugou felt his heart beating out of his chest as he stared at you. He brought his hand up to grab the umbrella from your hand, his own fingers curling around yours and around the stem of the umbrella. You gasped inwardly at the sudden contact, your own heart palpitating vigorously. 

In the darkness of the night sky and the droplets pouring down from the gray clouds, Bakugou’s crimson eyes shined against the dullness of your surroundings as they pierced right through you. “Listen up ‘cause I’m only gonna say this once.”

Bakugou’s fingers gripped yours as he took a deep breath. “I like you, (F/N).”

Your eyes widened as Bakugou muttered your name through his lips. It was the first time he had addressed you by anything other than your hero name, let alone your first name. You smiled gently. “I like you too, Katsuki.”

Your lips parted as you began to speak, talking about how much you admired him and his ambitious ways. But Bakugou couldn’t hear a word, just watching your lips moving. Despite the bleakness of the weather, your skin was practically glowing, the same aura radiating off of you like it always had. Your locks were slightly wet from the rain as they hung against your shoulders. But your lips, red and plump, were the only thing Bakugou could focus on.

“Shut up, would ya?” Bakugou murmured. You were taken aback, staring up at Bakugou as he sighed once more and abruptly said, “I wanna kiss you.” 

You were puzzled, wanting to ask why until you sucked in a breath as his warm lips planted themselves on yours. The umbrella hovering over your head fell to the floor with a thud along with the umbrella in Bakugou’s hand. The rain pelted both of you, drenching you within seconds but neither of you paid any mind to it. Bakugou’s warm lips compensated for the coldness in the air and he snaked an arm around your waist, pulling you closer to him. Your hands held fistfuls of his tank, being completely drawn into his touch. 

Bakugou pulled away, a blush tinting his cheeks as he looked down at you, your own face heating up from the aftermath of the kiss. You giggled, brushing away some blonde hairs that were stuck to his forehead. “You know I brought two umbrellas for a reason, right?”

Bakugou smirked, picking one up and holding it over your head. You smiled, grabbing the other umbrella and closing it, wanting to be close to Bakugou huddled under one umbrella rather than two. Although the night hadn’t gone to plan and wasn’t what Bakugou or what you were expecting, it was safe to say that both of you left that night feeling more satisfied than you could’ve ever been.

[ikleesfiction]

Will you follow through if I fall for you?

Fandom : One Chicago Word count : 2,409 words Disclaimer

Previously on this fic : Part 1 🞂 Part 2 🞂 Part 3 🞂 Part 4 🞂 Part 5

Part 6

It's been a few days since your date night with Jay. It went much better than you expected. You knew from the start that Jay is a good guy and probably a sweet lover too. But after that night, you found out that there's more to him than his good look and easy-going attitude. Jay's gentleness soothes your insecurities. His understanding warms you from inside. It's hard to feel miserable when he's around. You cannot help but latch on to him.

You and Jay keep texting and calling each other every day, but you only got to meet him once since then. For a coffee date before he ran to work while you went for your PT session. His job doesn't leave a lot of spare time, so you relish all the time he spends with you.

You hear your phone rings when you have your lunch. There is a video call request from your best friend and work-mate, Alex. "Hey, you! I miss your stupid face!" you greet him.

"You know what's not stupid?" Alex ignores your greeting. "The new material I received this morning

He refers to an email you sent him last night. Instead of sleeping, you wrote some lines and tinkered some notes on your electric keyboard. It was still very rough, but you and Alex swap ideas all the time. They could be a bar of melodies or chord progressions. Or maybe a single line that you cannot get out of your head, even there's no context to it.

"Wanna work on it soon?" Alex proposes.

"Yeah, sure!" you easily agree.

"You know I'm gonna ask how you come up with that song idea, right?" Alex probes further. He got an idea about your sudden burst of inspiration, but you haven't told him anything yet so far.

"You can ask. I might not answer", you nonchalantly retort. "Are you asking now?"

"I would, but I just arrived at my parents' house for our weekly dinner", Alex turns his camera phone and shows you his family dining table. "Say hi to Y/N, Pop" He lets his parents know that you're on the phone.

"Hallo, Liefje" Alex's parents greet and wave at you. "I miss you, Y/N. How are you doing, darling?" Alex's mom squeals at you.

"I miss you guys too. I miss home," you utter mournfully.

"I saw your dad last week. He and your mom cannot wait to have you back home next month. As are we." Alex's dad informs you.

Your face gets even more upset. "I haven't told my parents yet, but it's gonna be another two months. It's not working out as good as they wanted"

Alex's parents let out a sympathetic noise. "Oh great, I still have two more months to hide all my chocolate from you" Alex teases you instead. He knows if he doesn't throw any humor here, you're going to weep. The family laughs at your offended look.

"Where's Sara?" you ask them when you didn't notice Alex's little sister on the table.

"She's getting ready for a date after dinner. Said they will go stargazing. Can you believe it?" Alex skeptically recounts to you.

"Hmm, that sounds romantic. Good for her." you hum your appreciation. Alex can see twinkles in your eyes.

"Of course, you thought it was charming", Alex sounds vexed.

"Why are you so grumpy about this? You have a hit song that compared someone's eyes with the moon", you remind him. "Last time I checked, that song already got more than 400 million streams on Spotify". Alex just grumbles incoherently, while you can hear his father's booming laugh in the background.

"Alex, would you please call your sister down for dinner?" Alex's mom orders him.

"Alright, ma. Gotta go, Y/N. I'll call you later when I'm back at the studio. Bye, sis!" Alex ends the call.

◢◤

Kelly Severide comes to your place in the evening after he finished his shift. He called you on your cell several times, but you didn't pick them up. He knocked on your door for a few minutes without answers. Worried that something bad happened to you, he uses his key to open your apartment door. You gave him a spare when you began your recovery from the incident. Since you got nobody in town except for the 51 Family, you thought at least one of them should have access to your place, in case you need help.

Kelly sees you sitting on your corner desk with headphones on. Your head is nodding to the beat you're working on. Relieved to know you okay, but feels a bit annoyed, Kelly taps your shoulder lightly. You jump in surprise, almost fall from your chair if Kelly doesn't hold you down.

"Kelly! What..! Why are you..??" your heart is still pounding in shock, makes you unable to finish your thoughts properly.

"I knocked! And called you many times! Neither you answered! I was afraid that you fell and unconscious so I used my key", Kelly exclaims.

You check your phone and see seven missed calls from Kelly. "Sorry, I left my phone on mute, somehow"

Kelly goes to raid your fridge and takes a bottle of apple juice. "Your fridge needs beers" he judges. "Go, get ready! We'll hang out at Molly's. Everyone misses you", Kelly orders you.

"I'm working, Kelly. Just because my work has no shifts, doesn't mean I can go anytime you want", protest you.

"You work for your best friend, who's in another continent right now. You can slack off for a bit" he dismisses your complaint.

"I'm making big progress here. My writing juice is flowing", you point at your laptop.

"One hour. I give you one hour to work. Then I'm hauling you out of here. In the meantime, I'm gonna order take out for us", Kelly decides.

You only mumble your disagreement, knowing that you're gonna lost the argument anyway. So you just put your headphones back on your head. However, Kelly pokes you again five minutes later, with his phone on hand, "Hey, do you want Thai or Greek? I'm in the mood for Greek right now", Kelly playfully asks you.

"Yeah, Greek is fine" you start to feel bothered.

He leaves to order the food while you're back to do your work. Ten minutes passed, Kelly drags a chair from the kitchen island to your side. He knocks on the table to catch your attention.

"Hey, I just remember, Brett said they saw you rescued somebody at the swimming pool last week. How did that happen?" he questions.

You let out a desperate sigh. "You're not going to let me work in peace, are you?"

Kelly just grins. "C'mon, we haven't hung out for a while. Lots of drama to share"

You save your work in defeat and then move to the kitchen to grab a bottle of water. Kelly sits on the couch with legs resting on the coffee table. You place yourself next to Kelly.

"They extend my therapy for another month" you restlessly play with your bottle cap.

"Is it not going well?" Kelly asks in concern.

"I got cramps that day at the swimming pool. They worried I damaged something. So they prefer to be cautious" you fill him in.

"That's when you rescued Dr. Manning's son " Kelly tries to clarify.

"Well, I just pulled him out of the water. The pool guard was the one who helped him breathe" you shrug.

"You assisted. It still counts as a rescue", Kelly insists. "Bet if Dr. Manning knew, she would buy you drinks at Molly's forever"

"More like got invited to dinner at their place," you mutter.

"Hmm, that's probably true" Kelly pauses for a moment, thinking. "Wait, did you meet her?" he grills you.

"Yeah. And her fiancé. I came to the hospital to check on Owen. Then next thing I knew I'm having family dinner with Manning/Halstead clan", you convey to him.

Kelly's phone chirps interruptedly. "Food's here" He goes to pick up the food from the delivery guy. "Alright, let's eat then we can go to Molly's"

◢◤

Jay is nursing his first beer as he watches Will bottoms up his third glass of whiskey. Will called him earlier in the evening, claimed that he needs bro night out after a shitty day at Med. Jay's initial plan to have dinner with you got scrapped before he even asked.

"Maybe you need to pace yourself, Will", Jay suggests to him as Will signs to Otis for a refill.

"Yeah, Doc. Maybe you want to switch? We have a nice Dutch craft beer chilling here", Otis offers. But Will is still holding out his empty glass to him, silently demanding for more. "Okay then" sighs Otis as he fills the glass.

Jay hears the commotions at the other end of the bar. He recognizes some people from Firehouse 51 there. Christopher Hermann is cackling, while Matt Casey grins widely. They pay attention to someone that is sitting among the group, but he cannot see who because Severide is blocking his view.

Jay checks his phone while he finishes his beer. He received a text from you beforehand, told him that she's going out to meet her friends tonight. He texted back, wishing her to enjoy her night out, but got no replies. Will notices Jay's scrolling on his phone and asks, "Do you need to go back to work?"

"Nah, just checking my texts" Jay puts his phone back in his pocket. "Are you feeling better now?"

"Not in the slightest. But I still have to go to work tomorrow. If I wanna do better than today, I cannot do that with a hangover" Will sulks. "Hey Gabby, I would like to try that craft beer Otis suggested" he requests to Gabby who passes by.

"Would you like one as well, Jay?" Gabby offers him.

"Alright, why not.." Jay accepts the new bottle.

"Is this a new batch? Don't think I ever have it here before", comments Will after his first sip.

"Yeah! Just start to come in this month. It's a friend's favorite. She hooked us up with a supplier directly from The Netherlands. You like it?" Gabby enthusiastically claims.

"It's good. But still not Bourbon", Will pouts. Jay lets out a snort while Gabby snickers.

Jay looks around the bar as he savors his beer. He paused when he thought he saw you sitting among the 51 Gang. Will notices and looks in the same direction. "Is that Y/N?" asks Will.

Jay stands up for his seat, "I'm gonna go say hi to her"

◢◤

You feel a palm pressed to your back as you hear someone's saying from behind, "Didn't expect to see you here tonight"

You turn your back immediately as you realize whose voice it is, "Jay!" shout you excitedly. You open your arms to hug him. Jay lands a chaste kiss on your lips before hugs you back.

Kelly and Matt look at each other over your head with eyebrows raised. "Well, that's something I didn't expect" goads Kelly.

"Severide, Casey" Jay gives them an acknowledging nod with his hands stay on your hips.

"How do you know each other?" Matt asks curiously.

Jay opens his mouth to reply, but you hear Will's interruption, "You guys finally made it, huh?" Jay rolls his eyes at his brother.

"These guys have been sending heart-eyes at each other since they first met" Will tips off the 51 gang. "Which I arranged, by the way. But this result was unintentional"

"No, we're not!" you try to deny.

"I was there, Y/N, at your almost first kiss" Will divulges.

"Oh my god!" you hide your blushing face behind your palms. Jay smacks a kiss on the side of your head, amused while the group makes fun of you.

"I guess this happened after Y/N rescued Owen?" Sylvie asks to confirm.

"Ooooh yes, our next year candidate!" Hermann yells. The others just clap and whistle in response. You thud your head to the bar table, abashed.

"Hey, don't be embarrassed. We are proud of you" Casey remarks. "That said if you want to go to the academy..." he continues.

"Nuh-uh, I love my job, thank you very much" you quickly state.

You spend the rest of the night beside Jay, chatting and laughing with 51 Family and Halstead brothers until you let out a big yawn. "Tired?" Jay asks you softly.

You nod, "Beer always made me sleepy"

"Let me settle the tabs, then I'll take you home" Jay squeezes your shoulder as he stands up.

Kelly observes you and Jay throughout the night. When Jay left your side, he lowly speaks to you after making sure everyone else is busy conversing elsewhere. "So Jay Halstead is the one who got your juice's flowing, huh?"

"Kelly!" you slap his arm, agape.

"I mean your writing juice! You said it earlier!" Kelly yelps, but his smirk contradicts his words.

"You're the worst" you just shake your head.

Kelly's face turns serious for a moment, "Does he know about your situation?"

"What situation?" you try to sound innocent, but Kelly just gives you a look.

"Told him about the collapsing stage" you deflated.

"Have you told him that you're leaving in two months?" Kelly pushes.

"It's still too early. Who knows, Jay might end this soon", your voice sounds unsure.

"Don't think so. He looks quite smitten by you. Should probably tell him soon", Kelly disagrees.

"I'm happy right now, Kels. Can I just enjoy this for a while?" you start to lose patience with him.

"He deserves to know" Kelly persists.

You look down at the table, your fist is clenched in frustration. Jay comes back and notices the tense atmosphere. "Is everything okay?"

You reply with a forced smile, "Yeah, let's get out of here" then stand up from your seat and give Kelly a quick hug, "Thanks, Kels"

You move to say goodbye to the rest of the group, which takes a bit of time since everyone wants a hug or has something to tell you.

"C'mon guys, my boyfriend has waited long enough" you cry out when Sylvie and Gabby hold you back from going. The group guffaw even louder and playfully nudges Jay, who just beams brightly at you.

"Good night, guys!" you casually shout, finally getting away from the rest of the group, with Jay's hand in yours.

Next on this fic : Part 7

+x Taglist +x

@shipshipshipau @itsdesiree86 @thevelvetseries @annaallicce

[humbughana]

accidents

In which Rafe Cameron’s girlfriend needs help.

“So where's Rafe tonight, Lola?” my best friend asked, wiggling her eyebrows with a grin. I rolled my eyes with a laugh, “Working.” I chipped and took a sip of my drink. It was true, Rafe was working with his father tonight and insisted I go ahead without him. I told myself to tone it down tonight, I tended to go a little too hard at parties and Rafe ended up with me over his shoulder. 

“That's too bad,” she sipped her drink, “I was hoping he'd bring his hot friends” and pouted.

“Shut up,” I nudged her arm as we made our way through the mass of bodies and into the kitchen to steal more alcohol, “You know Topper likes you,” I drawled and opened the already unlocked and raided liquor cabinet. I heard her scoff and then Bingo. I pulled out the bottle and grinned at her, 

“So shots?” 

~ 

Five tequila shots later we were gone. We danced and laughed, stumbling around the packed party talking to familiar faces. I pointed when I noticed my drink was empty, “ ‘m going to get another drink!” I shouted over the music to my friend who nodded and waved me off. The kitchen was mostly empty save the couple making out in the corner to which I crinkled my nose up at, “Get a room,” I mumbled. 

I stood on my tip toes reaching for the bottle that rested on the top shelf of the bar and whined in annoyance. “Need help?” A new voice cut through the muffled music. I turned around and saw a boy I faintly remember from school and smiled to be nice. “Please?” I asked politely when he got closer and easily pulled the bottle that was fingertip distance away. 

“Thank you.” I smiled and went to grab the bottle out of his hands but he pulled it away with a grin, “I'll make you a drink.” He suggested with a trusting smile, “It'll be good, I promise.” he assured me and I convinced myself that he was no harm. He looked nice and was helpful so why not, I thought? So I nodded my head and sat on the bar stool and watched his back while he mixed the drink for me.

“There you go.” he grinned and slid the red drink towards me and I took a sip barely tasting the alcohol over the fruit punch flavor, “Thanks!” I chirped and took another big sip as he watched. 

“You're Rafe Cameron's girlfriend, aren't you?” I nodded, “I’m Lola.” He nodded with a grin that had my gut churning in a bad way. 

“Where is he?” The boy asked looking around, I furrowed my eyebrows and said, “Working.” He nodded again, “Good.” I frowned at him, feeling fully uneasy now and decided to excuse myself. “I need to go find my friend actually, thanks for the drink.” I slipped off the high stool but when my feet hit the floor the entire world pitched sideways and I stumbled.

“Woah, woah, slow down yeah?” The mystery boy was at my side as I tried to blink away the darkness invading my vision, as I tried to concentrate on staying upright. 

“I need to find my friend.” I slurred, as my feet stopped working altogether and I couldn't help but lean on the boy that pulled me into his side, his arm going around my waist. I knew I wanted him off of me but I had trouble forming the right words and moving myself to push him away. There was little I could do as he started walking us to the front door. I wanted to cry and scream but I felt like I was paralyzed.

“What did you do?” I slurred almost incoherently, he hushed me , “I'm going to take you home, okay?” He wasn't going to take me home that much I knew. The front door opened and he walked me out as I tried to be as slow as possible, stalling my time and looking around for a familiar face to catch my eye. 

“Please,” I groaned as we walked down the steps as he grabbed my waist tighter, wondering too low. 

“Jack!” A familiar voice made the boy freeze and turn us around, “What are you doing?” the voice questioned, suspicious in his tone. I tried to push him away and scream but everything was slowing down and I ended up dropping further into the stranger.

“Taking her home,” my kidnapper, Jack, said confidently, “She had too much to drink.” I felt him shrug as my head lolls forward, nonchalantly. I couldn't even tell who stopped us but made out two guys standing in front of us. 

“Well I know for a fact that's Rafe Cameron's girlfriend so unless they broke up, I'd suggest you leave her be.” The voice threatened and I wanted to cry at the name of my boyfriend. I wanted him here, my lip wobbled and scared tears welled in my eyes. I heard them argue back and forth, “You're not taking her anywhere.” 

“You're gonna stop me?” Jack asked tauntingly as his hand slid further down around me as I did my best to squirm away.

“Whatd you give her?” The new stranger snapped, “This is a new low, even for you.” 

“Whatever the bitch isn't even worth it.” I felt the earth move and I could tell I was falling before roughly hitting the ground. I cried out as my knees scraped the rough sidewalk. 

“John B, call Rafe.” I heard the command and tried to lift up my head, I realized then who it was, JJ Maybank. Sworn enemy of Rafe. “Sit her up or something.” John B told JJ and I felt hands lifting my upper body. 

“Hey, can you hear me?” JJ snapped his fingers in my face and I flinched but nodded.

“Don't call Rafe,” I slurred out the cry, “Please.” 

“He’s on his way.” John B made his way back into my blurry vision.

“It's my fault,” I cried, tears leaking down my cheeks, arms too weak to reach up and whip them away.

“It's not your fault.” JJ responded, ending the conversation.

I then started drifting in and out of consciousness coming around to shouting before familiar hands gently grabbed my face. My eyes fluttered open and saw Rafe crouched in front of me. I tried to say something, anything but nothing came out. I heard cursing before hands slid under my knees and I was weightless again. 

~

I woke up in soft sheets. My eyes peeled open and I let out a low groan, confused at how I got here. What had happened last night, my head was pounding, signs of my usual hangover but something felt off. My knees ached and I flung the covers off my legs and frowned at the bandages covering both. I ran my fingers over the bandages and winced at the pain that I felt. I laid there trying to come up with what had happened for the majority of the night but came up virtually blank. I felt myself panic as I looked at the bedroom that belonged to Rafe, so he must have had to come get me.

“Good morning,” I snapped my head over towards the doorway and saw him. Concern littered his handsome face and I frowned and tried my best to come up with something, an apology or an explanation but I didn't know what it would be for.

“I cant-” I choked out, “ Why can't I remember anything?” Rafe’s face fell and he sat down on the bed next to me, wrapping an arm around me, “I just want you to relax okay?” I looked up at his face but nodded. And so he told me what had happened. Jack, being drugged, being saved by JJ Maybank, all of it. The retelling of the story had me remembering bits and pieces, feeling scared and helpless, numb and paralyzed. I was crying when we stopped talking.

“I'm sorry.” I cried into his chest, hands wrapping around me, “I’m so stupid!” 

He pulled back and grabbed my cheeks, forcing me to look at him through my watery vision, “It wasn't your fault.” he firmly told me.

“What now?” I laid my head back on his chest, curling up next him. 

“I’ve got it handled,” he sighed, rubbing my back, “The police are looking for him.” my eyes widened.

“What he did was wrong, Lo,” Rafe was stern, “Not to mention illegal. He's lucky I didn't kill him myself.” I nodded, understanding him.

“I didn't know.” I broke the lingering silence. 

“I love you.” he kissed my forehead, “I don't know what I would have done if anything else happened to you,”

[azurika-writes]

Starstruck

Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary: you win a competition for a tour around the compound with a group of other winners and a meet and greet with the Avengers afterwards. You’re there to meet your idol, Bucky Barnes but he gets swarmed by other people who are there to meet him and so you almost miss your chance, until Steve Rogers sees the desperation in your face, he comes to your rescue. 

Warnings: this is a slow burn one shot, Bucky is your idol, language, Tony can’t mind his own business for a minute and is rude, sweet Bucky :)

Words: 4,215 (holy shit)

Authors Notes: I don’t know why this is so long holy shit, it’s my first slow burn fic I’ve written so far instead of drabbles. This idea came to me in a daydream and I don’t know if anything like this has previously been written but regardless, I hope you enjoy and feedback is more than welcome as always :)

It was a big day for you, full of excitement and nerves as you glanced down at your VIP pass. It wasn’t often you won these competition things, and you don’t really know why you participated, maybe it had something to do with a certain superhero that was listed to be apart of the special meet and greet or maybe it wasn’t that reason but you’re glad you did as you were one of 5 winners. Winning a special tour of the Avengers compound and then meeting the superheroes in the flesh afterwards. 

You were most excited to meet one particular superhero. The one with the black and gold vibranium arm and the shaggy hair and a full-grown beard covering his adorable cheeks. The one you’ve read and studied so much about the last couple of years. 

Sergeant James Buchanan Barnes. Former veteran soldier, former Howling Commando, survivor. 

You surprised yourself because, history books, you would normally find quite boring, but knowing he was apart of that era made it all that more interesting and you became hooked, infatuated even as you researched every detail about the war he was apart of, understanding what he had to endure during his time in captivity, the ins and outs of his and Steve’s friendship, the good and the bad. The further you dug into his life, the more your heart clenched tightly in your chest. 

The more recent interviews of him, you wouldn’t believe he was once a different man. You half expected him to be this closed-off person with no interest in the public whatsoever but to your utter shock and surprise, Bucky was so down to earth. Paying close attention to the interviewer’s questions. Answering them in-depth with so much philosophy behind his words. You watched hours upon hours of YouTube videos of Bucky meeting with fans, he took pictures and smiled for the photo. Autographed their merchandise. Bucky was always smiling, despite everything he had been through. You followed him on Instagram and Twitter. He’s never noticed you, but some other lucky fans were noticed, it didn’t bother you because you preferred not to have the attention, you looked forward to seeing his posts, stories and tweets he puts up for the world to see.

You admired him. You wanted to tell him face to face just how strong he was. The strong soldier has endeavoured so much in his life. Hydra stealing his freedom away from him, turning him into their own little puppet. He deserved this peaceful life he was being given. 

You wanted to meet Bucky Barnes and here was your chance, you just hoped you wouldn’t trip over your words once you finally did. You held the folder that contained handwritten stories, artwork and letters of encouragement that you wanted to give to Bucky as a gift and a picture you wanted to be signed under your arm. 

You hung the pass around your neck as you waited with the crowd outside the large black iron gates. A muscled and tall security walked over a few moments afterwards and asked for everyone’s names, checking them off the piece of paper he had in his hand on a clipboard.

“Please pay attention to any instructions you’re given. Please stick together. Do NOT venture off on your own. If you do NOT comply with any rules, you will be asked to leave. Any questions?” The security guard asked and there were mutters of no’s from everyone in the group. “Alright, follow me please.” You all followed the man in silence, occasionally glancing at the other people.

The iron gate that was hinged upon two stone pillars opened easily and quietly. And once everyone was inside, it was closed with an echoing ‘clang’, momentarily startling you. The security guard walked ahead and led the group up a really long pebbled footpath. The bright green grass on either side of the path was littered in gorgeous flowers and blossoming cherry blossom trees. Your feet scuffing across the stones as you walked, taking in the scenery around you. The place was absolutely magical, if someone was to describe it to you, you would think they were just fantasising. Something that you would absolutely do As you continued walking, to your left was a large space where the quinjets were receiving their maintenance from engineers. The large A on the front of the building came into view. The place looked enormous, larger than you ever expected. 

You almost stumbled into the person in front of you. It was only then you realised everyone had stopped walking and was waiting near the doors.

The security guard turned around one final time. “Alright everyone’s attention, please. As I mentioned previously, please stick together. Do not be tempted to break away from the group and roam around by yourself. Please abide by these simple rules. Other than that, have fun and enjoy your experience. Mr Stark himself will take the guide over once you’re inside.” And with that, the guard flashed his key-card and the large glass doors opened. He stepped aside and motioned for everyone to go in. 

The lobby was probably the biggest you’ve ever seen imaginable. Even pictures from Pinterest couldn’t compare to the sheer size of this. The floors and walls were marbled. Workers behind their desks typing away on their computers and phones ringing off the hook.

The ding from the elevator caught everyone’s attention. Excitement bubbled up within you. You knew it was most likely to be Mr Stark since he was going to be the tour guide from here, but something in you wished for a moment it would be Bucky Barnes. 

But when the doors opened on the lavished elevator, it, of course, wasn’t. You hoped your disappointment wasn’t too noticeable. 

“You’re the groups of winners?” Tony wondered, pulling up his tablet to check the list of names. He called each name out one at a time to receive a stamp on their wrist. Once everything was validated, Tony led the way. The group following him closely but quietly. 

“As you folks can see, this is the lobby. We currently have over 10,000 staff employed in this area alone with over 200 security guards.”

“Why do you have so many?” A man from your group asked Tony. 

“Because we’re the Avengers, you don’t know who is out there to harm there. Hydra could walk through those doors at any given time. Moving on.” Tony walked towards the staircase, he explained it was because of maximum weight capacity in the elevator. The stairwell was echoed and so many stairs. You were quite winded when you got to the top.

“Are you alright there, Y/N is it? Do you need a medic?” You didn’t know whether Tony was joking or being serious, but you took quite a few deep breaths and shook your head no. 

“Alright. So welcome to the main floor. Here we have the common room, debriefing room, offices, a kitchen and numerous bathrooms along the hall.” Tony explained, pointing to each doorway down the long and narrow hallway. This was the floor of the common room? Bucky Barnes could be here, he could be through those doors, and that thought alone made your heart jump in your throat. 

“What is the common room used for?” A younger lady asked Tony. 

“The common room is where we, The Avengers hang out, unwind and relax after kicking ass. Follow me.” 

In the near distance, you could hear hushed voices as Tony led the group into the actual common room. It was empty besides two people; Clint and Natasha. Two superheroes you easily recognized.

“I wonder where Bucky is?” You leaned in and asked the girl standing next to you. She smiled back politely, “I haven’t seen anyone yet. They are due for the meet and greet right?” She asked you. With a nod of your head, you noticed Tony had stopped talking and was looking in your direction. 

“If you two are done with your conversation.” You both muttered an apology. “This is Natasha and Clint, our finest heroes. You’ll meet them and everyone else a bit later, let me show you the kitchen area.” Tony led the group further into the compound. The architecture was just incredible and out of this world. It was something you never really expected.

Tony showed you every nook and cranny of the compound; The indoor swimming pool with sauna and jacuzzi, the gym on the lower floor, the sleeping quarters one or two floors up, and he showed you the helipad where the quinjets received their maintenance and checks before takeoff. 

“Have you guys enjoyed yourselves?” Tony asked as he led you all once again into the common room, where this time more voices were heard. Everyone answered incoherently but you decided to keep quiet, afraid of getting told off again by Tony. “It’s been a pleasure having you.” He sighed, stopping just outside the door of the common room. “Now is the time you’ve been waiting for. You will have a chance to meet each superhero and please, don’t be shy. They are not as scary as they seem.” Tony winked, opening the door and motioning for all of you to walk through. As you were about to walk through, Tony grabbed your wrist and held you back. For a moment you were worried you would be denied this opportunity to meet your hero, “Are you alright? You’ve been the quietest out of the group.” Tony consoled. 

“I’m fine, I’m just taking everything in.” You smiled and Tony nodded, letting go of your wrist, allowing you through the door and once you did and made eye contact with those baby blues, you almost died. You became starstruck and it was almost impossible to peel your eyes away from him. In a line next to him stood the Avengers in their casual clothes, each with a glowing smile on their faces as they saw the pure shock on the group’s faces. 

“Hi and welcome!” Wanda smiled ushering everyone forward.

“Hi, Wanda. I’m your biggest fan.” One of the girls gushed as she stepped towards Wanda, tears running down her cheeks. You watched the group approach the one superhero they wanted to meet the most, you didn’t anticipate 3 other girls would approach and crowd Bucky so quickly. But the guy took it well, smiling and talking to them as he answered their questions, they were giggling and no doubt flirting. You stood back awkwardly, unsure about what to do. 

“Hey, kid. Are you gonna meet anyone?” Tony asked amused as she stood next to you, pushing his glasses up his face. 

“He’s kind of occupied.” You chuckled, your eyes wandering over to Bucky. 

“Yeah, he usually gets all the ladies.” Tony chuckled, stepping away to help someone. 

Your heart sank into the pit of your stomach as you noticed more and more people were now waiting to meet the former Winter Soldier. He was a lot more popular than you had realized, and it was just a realization that maybe you weren’t meant to meet him. You instead chose not to waste this once in a lifetime opportunity and decided to approach Steve Rogers who was free from a crowd and he was your second favorite superhero.

“Hey!” He said smiling as you approached, his perfectly lined teeth on show. His T-shirt was pulled across his broad chest. Steve stretched a hand out for you to shake.

“Hi! How are you?” You asked politely, returning the firm handshake. His hand was silky smooth like he had dipped them in a butter dish prior to meeting everyone.

“Can’t complain. Got a few days off to enjoy the sunshine. What do you have there?” He pointed to the folder that you had under one arm. 

“Oh, it’s kind of embarrassing but these are some things I wanted to gift to Bucky Barnes, but it looks like I won’t meet him.” You chuckled sadly, looking down at your feet. 

“He’s the popular one with these greets. He really outshines us all, I’m sure he would really appreciate it though.” Steve comforted but knowing time was running out and people just kept swarming him. You pulled your lip between your teeth, desperately willing yourself not to let your true disappointment show, but you couldn’t help it. You would never get this opportunity again and Bucky was impossible to reach out to on social media with over 50 million followers on Instagram and a whopping 20 million on Twitter. Even if you did reach out, there were too many people trying to reach him, your messages and tweets would be swallowed. This just annoyed you since you were only a couple of feet from the man you’ve spent a long time learning everything about, sympathizing with and he was still out of reach. 

Steve had been looking at your contour of emotions while you remained quiet. The folder under your arm was thick, he knew you were a genuine fan of Bucky’s and not just some fan girl who was here to flirt and try and get a hold of his personal number or request a follow on social media. 

“May I take a look?” Steve asked, pointing to your folder. His voice startled you slightly and you nodded shamefully. There was far too much dedication in that folder and you were sure he was going to lecture you for being too invested in Bucky when Bucky didn’t know who you were. You passed him the folder and Steve quietly looked through, you watched his eyebrows rise and fall on occasion and small smiles here and there. You swallowed the lump in your throat and bounced on the balls of your feet. 

“Alright, guys. That’s it, time is up! I really hope you all had a wonderful experience and could I please ask you all to calmly exit the common room and I’ll meet you in the hallway.” Tony spoke up and you panicked. Bucky was still laughing and joking with the girls and it was a moment lost. But Steve still hadn’t given you your folder back and you knew he must have heard Tony. 

“See you later ladies!” Bucky called out to them as they waved and blew kisses. You heard Bucky chuckle, “Man I thought they’d never leave.” He told Clint before walking out after the group.

“Uh Y/N?” Tony started but Steve looked up with glossy eyes. 

“Wait Tony, I’d like to keep her a while longer, don’t worry I’ll show her out afterwards,” Steve said, Tony was confused and you were confused, was there something he found in that folder that bothered him? Were you in trouble? Oh god, maybe your letters were too personal.

“Alright, freezer burn. Rest of you follow me please.” 

One by one the avengers left, except for Steve. You were still standing in front of him awkwardly, your heart beating a thousand beats per minute. You noticed he was now taking his time flicking through your folder. 

“This is really beautiful.” Steve complimented, he made sure Bucky was out of earshot before he continued, “You’ve spent so much time on this, your dedication, you really meant every word you think about him don’t you?” You knew he was referring to one of your many letters of encouragement, reminding him he’s human and a good man. 

“I meant it.” You replied sheepishly.

“You should meet him, Y/N. He would love this so much.” 

“I can’t. Tony has already kicked everyone out.” You chuckled, reaching for your folder but Steve wasn’t giving it back just yet. 

“And I’ve already told him I wanted to keep you a while longer. You’ve clearly come here to see him and it’s only right you did. FRIDAY, where did Barnes disappear to?” Steve asked the disembodied AI.

“Sergeant Barnes is in his room, Captain Rogers.” Steve sighed and rubbed his neck. 

“Please tell him to come back to the common room.” 

“Yes sir.” The AI responded almost immediately. 

“Cap? Can I have a word?” Tony walked through the door with his arms folded. Steve nodded and handed your file back to you. 

Your heart rate was still accelerating at a dangerous speed once you were left alone in the common room with your folder clutched to your chest. You were still worried Steve found something that might have bothered him, you were confused why he wanted to keep you behind while everyone else had to leave and you didn’t understand why he wanted you to meet Bucky so badly, you were already given the opportunity and it didn’t happen. 

Your thoughts froze when you heard heavy footsteps in the hallway and a tall, muscular figure round the corner with his hands shoved in his pockets. His eyebrows creased together when he saw it was just you in the room and not Steve. 

“You’re still here?” Bucky asked, his eyes narrowed and you gulped, nodding your head. “Not keeping you hostage is he?” He chuckled, trying to lighten the mood. A smile grew on your face as he stepped closer to you. The purest of blue eyes you’ve ever seen in your life and they were looking right at you, one side of his shaggy hair was tucked neatly behind his ear and from this distance, you saw the dog tag chain around his neck and the tags clanking under his black Henley. This was your last opportunity to say what you wanted, to give him this folder, you knew you wouldn’t get this chance again and you were grateful to Steve for helping you out. 

“I um… sorry I’m a mess.” You chuckled and blinked the tears away. It was like a reunion you weren’t really prepared for. 

“It’s okay, let’s take a seat.” He motioned to the couches and you followed him. He sat on the coffee table opposite you and once you were ready and collected, you spoke more clearly. 

“This is for you.” You handed your folder to him and he took it gracefully. “I um…” your voice came out shaky and nervous but you kept going, “I just really have to tell you that I think you’re wonderful, a true hero, one of my heroes and um, I never really thought I’d get this opportunity to meet you in person and definitely not, um one on one, this really means the whole world to me.” Tears were starting to run freely down your cheeks at this point and Bucky sighed happily.

“You know, I’m extremely grateful for wonderful people like you. I noticed you when you walked through the door but unfortunately, I got swamped and I felt kinda bummed out myself that I didn’t even get to say hi. Thanks for coming here today and staying behind. I’m really glad you did and thank you so much for this.” He waved the folder in his hand. “I’ll definitely take a good look through it later in the privacy of my own room.” He smiled. 

“I do have one thing for you to sign if that’s okay?” 

“Yes of course!” He shifted on the coffee table slightly and the wood cracked under his weight. Your hands immediately covered your mouth as you tried to suppress a giggle. 

“If anyone asks… that wasn’t me.” He chuckled and stood up, choosing to sit next to you instead. 

“What happened to the coffee table?” Tony asked as he reappeared through the doors. “You’re here an awfully long time Missy.” Tony pointed accusingly at you. 

“Sam did it and leave her alone Tony. She has Steve’s permission to be here as well as mine.” Bucky glared and your cheeks heated up. “What did you want me to sign, doll?” Your heart almost choked on its own blood vessels at the pet name you knew very much about. It was more common in the 1940s and you wondered if Bucky or Steve ever used it today as an endearment to their women. 

“Make sure she’s gone so-”

“Fuck off Tony. Excuse my language, doll.” God, was he trying to kill you?

“You... you called me ‘doll’.” your breath got caught stuck in your throat. 

“Twice.” He winked.

Tony muttered under his breath as he left the common room with a weird looking android following him. Once you collected your thoughts, you pulled out one of your favorite pictures of Bucky that you had printed off the internet and handed it to him. Bucky reached into his pocket to pull out a sharpie and pulled the lid off with his teeth as he signed it. Your eyes slightly wandered over to his metal hand, it was the black and gold you loved so much. You remembered reading into so much detail about the different bionic arms, this one was made in Wakanda by Shuri herself with a lot of features that weren’t disclosed to the public. It looked more comfortable than the old silver arm with the red star which symbolized Hydra. 

“There we go!” His voice startled you. Your eyes shot up to meet his own and you blushed under his stare. 

“Th-thank you so much.” You stammered. Feeling hotter than a cookie baking in the oven. 

“You’re welcome!” He smiled, clipping the lid back on the sharpie. 

“Again, I really do appreciate this. Thank you for being so humble and I hope you find the letters encouraging.” You grinned looking down at the signed photo with a long message scripted on the back that you’ll read a little later.

“Well as I said, I really appreciate you for staying behind and for the folder. I can’t wait to look through it.” 

“Could I… could I be cheeky and ask for a quick selfie with you?” You bit your lip nervously. You were prepared for him to say no and that you had outstayed your welcome, so you were a bit surprised when his face lit up like a Christmas tree. 

“Yes!” You pulled your phone from your pocket and brought the camera app up. Bucky scooted in closer to you. “Tag me in it so I can add it to my story.” he smiled for the camera and you clicked the button, checking the photo to make sure it was good. You thanked him for the hundredth time.

“Okay, but I doubt you’d see it.” you chuckled and stood up, putting your phone back into your pocket. 

“Why’s that?” He deadpanned and you chuckled. 

“Um, sir. I don’t know if you know this but you have like 50 million people following you and probably 100 million DMing you to try and talk to you.” 

“Hmm. You’re right, maybe I’ll have to try and find you then.” He winked and before you could react, Tony reappeared. 

“I’m leaving,” you told him before he made another snarky comment about you still being there. 

“If you’re ready, would you please follow me.” He started to walk towards the door but you, for some reason kept still in your spot, contemplating whether to throw your arms around his midsection and give him a hug or walk away and regretting not hugging him. You went with the first option, and Bucky, seemingly reading your mind already had his arms opened wide and embraced you gracefully. They were big and strong, just like you had anticipated. His cologne was like sandalwood and vanilla, mixed with spearmint. Daring yourself further, you reached up on your tiptoes and kissed him quickly on the cheek. 

“Thank you, Bucky. It was a pleasure meeting you.” you smiled, pulling away from his embrace. He nodded curtly towards you. Tony huffed impatiently by the door and you reluctantly walked away from your hero.

Tony led you to the elevator since it was just the two of you. You felt the need to apologize for outstaying your welcome.

“Mr. Stark I’m so sorry for staying longer I-”

“Don’t stress kid. Cap explained everything, and don’t worry I almost guarantee Barnes will be in touch when he gets to the end of your folder.” you smiled but knowing that wouldn’t be true. Bucky probably wouldn’t think about you again after today. After all, he did receive hundreds and hundreds of gifts each week. 

The lavished elevator dinged and you stepped out in sync. Tony nodded to the security guard and you handed your VIP pass back to him before he opened the large glass doors for you to exit. 

“Thank you again, Mr. Stark.” You walked out, taking one last look of the compound before walking down the long pebbled path once again. Once you reached the iron gates, you gave the first security guard your name and he ticked you off the list, opening the gates and allowing you to exit. 

“Have a nice day, Miss.” He said and you nodded with a small smile. You walked further down the sidewalk and stopped. Turning the photo Bucky had signed for you. Smiling greatly as you read it.

Dearest Y/N,

It’s not often I get fans like yourself. You’re truly one in a million and for the record, I’m glad Steve kept you behind, I’m glad he connected us. We will meet again soon, doll. Until then, please keep safe and please keep reaching out. I notice more than you think.

Best regards,

Bucky

[harrysgloves]

Let Your Hair Down (chapter xxix)

Get caught up with the Let Your Hair Down Masterlist!

word count: 1,815

story summary: Harry gets more than he bargains for when he falls not only for you but your little girl as well.

chapter summary: Harry’s in over his head.

warnings: Language // mentions of injuries // suicidal ideation // suicidal thoughts // panic attacks // I think like a smidge of ptsd too

a/n: This is a heavy one. The MC needs a real big hug. Tomorrow is the last one! Get ready for the end. xx

>>><<<

It had been 4 days.

4 days since you left the comfort of your room. You laid curled up on your side in your childhood bed, Thea snuggled up next to you. Silent tears falling from your eyes every time you caught a glimpse of her cheek.

Your life had managed to go to hell in the last 4 days.

Day number 2 you tried to leave your parents house, go back to normal life. The second you walked out the door a panic attack hit you so bad you couldn't breathe, your vision blackening. Your parents forced you to go back to the hospital to make sure your brain wasn't bleeding.

It wasn't.

You just can't leave your room without freaking out. All those people staring at your face. Knowing you'd gotten the shit beat out of you.

The pity and judgement in their eyes. It was too much.

The doctors recommended therapy and medication.

You refused saying you would be fine.

But as you laid in bed on night number 3, staring up at your ceiling. You wondered why you even bothered anymore.

It took 3 days for the pictures of your face to leak on the internet and 20 minutes afterwards for you to delete every social media platform you were on.

The comments were the worst things you'd ever read but not as bad as the things you were saying to yourself.

It only confirmed the fact you were a shit mom.

Thea would be better off without you.

She brought you food every day that your mom would send in with her but you mostly ended up eating plain crackers. Your stomach was too upset to force anything else down. Thea sat on the side of the bed as she forced you to eat. Not leaving until you did. She didn't understand. And why should she? She was too young to get the things going on in your head.

You told her you felt like the color blue, rolling over on your other side after choking down some crackers for the 3rd day in a row. Her small body hugging against your back as she whispered,

Me too.

Day 5 had to be your worst. You finally worked up enough courage to look at your face in the mirror.

But you wished you hadn't.

Heart sinking to the bottom of your stomach as your one open eye took in all the damage done. Almost your entire forehead was black and purple. Your left eye was completely swollen shut. The splint you had to have on your nose in order to breathe definitely wasn't the best but the part that made you break down?

The stitches running from your forehead down through your left eyebrow. You'd have a permanent scar there for the rest of your life.

And every time you'd look in the mirror from this day on you'd be reminded of all the things you'd done wrong.

You screamed how worthless you were to your reflection. Throwing all the bottles of lotion and beauty products off the counter. Nothing would ever be beautiful to you again.

You sank to the floor, arms holding yourself as you cried. Your swollen face pressed hard against the cool tile as you let it all out. Gasping for air through your mouth, screaming incoherent things as your hand beat on the floor until you broke open the wounds on your hands again.

You wished he would have killed you.

Your dad broke the door down to get to you. Thea crying into your mom's shoulder on the other side and you wished you would have cared, but you didn't. You didn't care about anything, yourself, living, even her being upset.

She'd be better off without you around to do this to her. She'd be happier with your parents, maybe even Mitch and Sarah could take her.

Your dad carried you to your bed. Laying you down, brushing the hair out of your face as you tried to push him away.

It'd be easier if you just pushed them all away.

He shushed you. Humming the song he sang to you so many times as a kid. Not leaving the bed until you'd successfully cried yourself to sleep.

When you woke later that night you laid perfectly still in your place. The side of your bed filled with someone else who wasn't Thea. You sighed, not wanting to talk.

"Please leave." You whispered softly. Hands curled under your head.

"Not happening. Sorry." He said from behind you. His hand touching your back, making you flinch. You moved away from him, cringing at the other side of the bed. Tears falling down your cheek.

"Your parents called me over. We're all really worried." He sighed, hand retreating back to his own side of the bed.

"Don't be, Mitch. I'm fine." You tried your best to hold in your tears but you couldn't anymore. You weren't fine and you couldn't even lie about it anymore.

A sob leaving you as you buried your head in your mattress. Hands clutching onto the sheets as your tears soaked them.

"Please, talk to me." You ignored him, you didn't want to talk. You wanted your brain to just shut off.

"If not me then at least Harry. You know Thea called him today? He heard you in the background when your dad pulled you out of your bathroom. It's killing him to not check on you guys."

"I'm sorry." You mumbled out, voice muffled by your bed spread.

If you were being honest, you weren't sure what you were apologizing for. Maybe it was for not talking to anyone about this. Maybe it was about ignoring all the warning signs. Or worrying everyone around.

Or maybe it was because you laid in bed every night coming up with a way to leave everything behind.

"You didn't do anything wrong." He sighed, arm wrapping around you and pulling you into his chest.

And this time you let him touch you. Let him comfort you. It wouldn't matter eventually anyways.

Harry showed up the next morning before you woke up. He sat on the end of your bed. His hands in his lap as he stared at all the pictures you had from your high school years on your wall.

You sat up, clutching onto your knees, your head resting on the top of them as you looked at him. You wished you would have felt something. Even a small fraction of what you felt before when you looked at him would have been nice.

But you didn't feel anything. Not a damn thing. You were so numb and you couldn't tell if that was worse or better than before.

"Always forget how close y'and Mitch are. Always seems like y'and Sarah are closer." He said when you shifted your weight in bed. The springs giving away the fact you were up.

"It was always me and him in high school. I didn't really do the whole friend thing." You sighed, eyes darting away from his back to the pictures on your walls.

You used to be so happy.

"Yeh, y'dad told me." He didn't turn around to look at you still. His hands fumbled and twisted around the rings on his fingers as he stared so intensely at his lap.

You didn't say anything. The quiet wrapped around you so tightly it was suffocating. And whatever was left of your already broken heart was completely crushed looking at him like this.

"Harry, we need to talk." You whispered out so quietly. Wishing you didn't have to do this to him.

"Don't 'ave to. Already know what y'gonna say." He sighed, shoulders slumping forward.

Your one open eye filled with tears, biting your lip, and looking away from his back. You knew it would hurt but not this much.

"I brought this fo' ya." He said, standing up and pulling out the drawing Thea did that used to be hung up on your fridge.

Your brows furrowed as your bandaged hands took the piece of paper from him. Eyes taking in the smiling faces on the stick figures of the three of you.

"Why?" You asked, fingers running over the raised up area of green crayon that was used for Harry's hair.

"When I look at that y'know what I see?" He asked, sitting back down on the bed beside you, leaning over to get a look at the picture again.

You shook your head, having no idea where the hell he was going with this.

"My family."

His words broke you. Tears falling from your eye, soaking the picture in your hands. His arms wrapped around you instantly and you didn't fight it. Didn't flinch. Fell completely into his comfort, hand grasping his shirt.

"I'm so sorry." You cried. Head buried into his shirt.

"Y'got nothin' to be sorry fo'." He sighed, hand running through your hair. "I know y'need some time and some space but I'll always be here fo' y'and Thea."

"I know." You said, starting to calm down, sitting up from him and wiping the tears from your face. Wishing you could erase the last week from your memory. Wishing it never happened.

You just wanted to be happy again, like you were with him.

His hand coming up to gently run across your swollen eye. Over the deep sewn up cut over your eyebrow. Down your cheek and wiping away the tears you'd miss. His eyes taking in all the damage but eventually focusing on your lips.

"I love you." He sighed, his fingers running across your bottom lip, not looking at you. Your eye closed at his touch. Leaning in slightly to him.

The sound of knocking on the door made you look up. Thea peaking her head around the corner as she slowly opened it. Her eyes filled with nothing but worry as she peered in to check on you. It was soul crushing to see her so concerned about you.

Harry waved his hand for her to come over. Her feet carrying her quickly over to him, arms hugging around his neck as he pulled her onto his lap.

"I miss you." She cried into his shoulder. His hand running through her hair as he told her he missed her too.

You laid your head on his chest. Your arms wrapping around both of them. Harry's free arm pulled you in tightly to his side as Thea turned to look at you, her eyes filled with tears.

You promised yourself right then that you'd get help, never wanting to do this to her again. She needed her mom and you needed her.

And him.

"I love you too." You sighed. Your right eye closing as you heard him take in a deep breath.

You might not be together but you'd always love him.