#in which case why would I want to read you

[cheapshrimpysheep]

Yuutsum 3

SUMMARY: What if you also have a Tsum? Then your Tsum and the Tsum of the person you like keep giving signs that they like each other?

CHARACTERS: Twisted Tsumderland 3 Tsumsitters (Ace; Trey; Ruggie; Jamil; Vil; Idia; Malleus; Silver)

TAGS: Fluff; GN Reader 

WARNING: Spoilers for the Twisted Tsumderland 3 Event and the Tsumsitter cards Vignettes.

WORD COUNT: An average of 810 words per character.

COMMENTS: This was originally a request from @taruruchi for my 1k celebration. Which you can read here. And since so many readers liked it, I decided to do what I normally do when this happens: Do this for ALL the characters! Grouped by event in this case.

The request also includes Jamil's and Silver's tsums, but I wrote them before part 3 was even announced on the JP server. In other words, I had to pretty much guess what their tsums would be like, but now I could write them more accurately.

And I ended up get carried away writing Vil's and Idia's parts. 😅

I hope you enjoy 😉

Yuutsum 1 (Riddle; Cater; Leona; Jack; Floyd; Epel; Sebek)

Yuutsum 2 (Deuce; Azul; Jade; Kalim; Rook; Ortho; Lilia)

CONTEXT: Like the original Twisted Tsumderland 3 event, this takes place after the events of the first and second Twisted Tsumderland. And, surprise, your Tsum is back! But it’s the only one, all the other Tsums that came with it are completely new visitors.

Just like the other times, your Tsum seemed restless and wanted to leave Ramshackle Dorm, probably to go look for the other tsums. You decide to take a walk around the school building first and you notice a gathering in the cafeteria.

“If you give it devoted, loving care, I'm sure it'd be willing to show its gratitude!” You hear Ace's voice say from behind a wall of other students.

You come closer, with your tsum in your arms.

“So... Who wants to look after the tsum?!”

“I'll do it!” a Scarabia student offers.

“What are you talking about?” A Pomefiore student counterposes. “That's gonna be me!”

And an argue begins. You stand on your tiptoes and crane your neck to look over some students' shoulders and see an Ace-tsum on the table.

“Okay, easy, guys. You can all take turns trying your hand at looking after it.” Ace interrupts. “If things go well, you might get to see more tricks. And hey, if they don't do any, you can just return it tonight.”

Even though you know this is about Ace and his tsum, you can't help but feel a little sorry for the things Ace is saying. It's like he just wants to get rid of his tsum. Poor little guy. And your tsum agrees.

“I can take care of it!” Your voice rings out, Ace and Deuce recognizing it immediately.

The students in front of you turn and see that you have another tsum in your arms. They make way for you while commenting on how cute it is.

“(Y/N)?!” Ace and Deuce say in unison.

You lean over to look at Ace-tsum who is looking at you with bright, surprised eyes. You say you can take care of it since Ace doesn't want to. Your tsum jumps from your arms to Ace-tsum's side. You add that you have your tsum to help you supervise it and that you already have some experience with an Ace. He blushes a little.

“Wait (Y/N)!” Deuce says.“This is supposed to be Ace and my task. And you already have your tsum to take care of.”

“Don't worry, Deuce. We both can take care of it. Right, Tsum?” Your Tsum agrees and rubs its cheek against Ace-Tsum's cheek. “Better us than someone who treats it like a burden.” But Ace-tsum moves away from your tsum and Ace grabs your arm to pull you with him to talk to you alone.

“You dummy!” He tells you in a lower voice. “Listen, I'm not just trying to get rid of my tsum, okay?! I'm trying to find someone who adores it so much that they would love to fawn over it and take care of it. This will be better than being with someone who is only taking care of it out of obligation.”

You ask, then, why can't you take care of his tsum.

“Because I was trying to get some idiot to do it, not you!”

Then you hear and see that more students have joined the group that fawns over Ace-tsum. And it seemed like they were finding something cute?

You two go back to the table and see your tsums having fun with each other. Ace-tsum was showing magic tricks to your Tsum and seemed happier with your Tsum's surprised reaction than with the students' applause. Your tsum approached Ace-tsum and began to rub their cheeks against each other, like cuddling. Ace blushed again.

“Fine...” Ace gives up. “It seems like it wants to be with your tsum anyway.”

“Why don't we all take care of the tsums together again?” Deuce suggests, “Like we did when mine was here.”

You and your tsum agree.

“Yeah, I guess we can do that.” Ace says, then smirks. “At least now I can split the work between three.”

Surprisingly, Ace's Tsum is much calmer when it's around your Tsum. In addition to being extremely affectionate with your Tsum, it also seems to really enjoy impressing it with magic tricks and things like that. As if it loved having your tsum's attention and affection back, completely ignoring Ace's embarrassment.

Your tsum wanted to go somewhere, so you pick it up and let it guide you out of Ramshackle Dorm. You pass the Botanical Garden and the Alchemy Workshop and arrive at the Hall of Mirrors. Your tsum wants you to cross the mirror to Heartslabyul.

You do so, enter the building and you end up crossing paths with Trey in the hallway. He was carrying a cake container. You feel your tsum move slightly in your arms when it sees him.

“Hello (Y/N).” Trey greets you. “I see your tsum is back.” He smiles at it and you feel it move again. “This time one similar to me showed up too, so I'm also tsumsitting. I assume you're here to see it.” He chuckles seeing you and your tsum nodding. “It is in the lounge. But before that.” He opens the cake container revealing a beautiful cake with icing and grapes decorating it, and some slices already missing. “Do you want to try a slice? Tsum decorated it.”

If you like grapes, he will be happy to see you eating a slice. If you don't like them and are sad because you would like to try the cake, He will suggest that you go to the kitchen and take out just one piece that doesn't have grapes for you to taste.

“Here.” He says taking just a forkful of the icing cake. “This one doesn't have grapes.” He holds out the fork with the piece of cake in your direction.

You can take the fork and eat it yourself or you can eat it while he holds the fork. If you do this last one, he will laugh and then smirk slightly. Independently of what you do, you'll feel your tsum moving in your arms again, but not enthusiastically.

Trey asks if everything is okay with your tsum and you answer that it might be sad because it can't taste the cake, after all tsum don't eat.

“Oh, don't worry.” He says to your tsum with a sweet smile. “You liking the way it looks is good enough already.”

Your tsum makes that happy tsum sound and suddenly jumps out of your arms towards Trey who catches it and you see it nestling in his arms.

“Ha ha ha. Your tsum is more cheeky than mine. No, that's not a bad thing. I find it quite cute actually.”

If you are more outgoing, your tsum will make that happy sound again and smile at him with its eyes. If you are shy, your tsum will shrink a little and hide its face in his arms.

He will, happily, carry your Tsum in his arms to the lounge where his Tsum and other students are, but when the three of you get there...

“Is everyone done? I'll get the dishes - uh...” Trey and you see what appears to be his tsum attacking students with a toothbrush. “What’s going on here?”

Cater explains the whole madness with Tsum wanting everyone to brush their teeth. Trey ends up taking his Tsum's side and the students run to brush their teeth. Cater tries to apologize by saying that it took him longer to eat and even tries to say that he wanted to spend some time with your tsum. But it's no use, both Treys look at him with a menacing smile.

“Ah, I'm sorry! I swear I'll brush therm! Don't come near me with that smile on your face!” And he leaves the lounge as well.

Only Riddle, you, Trey and your two tsums remain. Trey-tsum points his toothbrush at you with that smile.

“Let's give (Y/N) a pass this time.” Trey defends you. “They are from another dorm so their toothbrush and toothpaste are not here.”

Trey-tsum lowers the toothbrush in agreement. Your Tsum jumps out of Trey's arms and lands next to his Tsum. They both make a happy sound and the two begin to rub their cheeks against each other as if cuddling.

“Your tsum is very affectionate, isn't it?” Trey comments with a smile.

Trey-tsum jumps onto your shoulder, presses its face against your cheek as if it were giving you a kiss, and jumps back to your tsum’s side. Then the two jump onto one of the sofas and snuggle up together as if they were nesting.

“How cute.” Riddle comments with a slightly mocking smile seeing Trey blush.

You were taking a walk around the school campus with your tsum in your arms when you heard Jack's voice calling you.

“Hey (Y/N), glad I found you.” Jack says. You turn around and he sees your Tsum in your arms who greets him smiling with its eyes. “Your tsum is back? So you should already know that other tsums have appeared too.”

You say you had already assumed that and ask if he was looking for you.

“More or less. The truth is that I was looking for someone who could help Ruggie with his tsum.”

You feel your tsum move in your arms when it hears Ruggie's name. Jack tells you that everything seemed to be going well between them until they started arguing, or rather fighting over the money they earned. Your tsum has the same reaction as you, probably an unsurprised sigh.

You agree to help and go with Jack to Savanaclaw. You find Ruggie and his tsum in the lounge fighting with each other. Riggie has an envelope in his outstretched hand trying to get it away from the tsum, while the tsum jumps at Ruggie to try to get to the envelope while hitting him.

Your tsum jumps out of your arms and sneaks up on them while they are focused on fighting each other. When it is close enough, it prepares itself and as soon as it sees an opening, it jumps and takes the envelope from Ruggie's hands. Then it runs to you with the envelope where its mouth would be and jumps back into your arms, handing you the envelope.

Ruggie looked at your tsum and you with the most threatening look you've ever seen on him, until he realized it was you and his expression changed drastically and his ears went down. His Tsum's reaction was the same. He even stutters your name in surprise.

“And h-hey, your tsum is back!” He tries to divert the conversation and ease the situation.

You don't fall for that and ask why they were fighting over the money. Ruggie explained to you that he still tried to give 20% to his Tsum since it doesn't need money to eat or things like that and that's why it seemed fair to him. But his tsum didn't like the idea and was trying to keep most of the money.

You ask your own tsum if that money is the same as in the tsum world, basically asking if it would be of any use to Ruggie-tsum, and your tsum shakes its head no.

“See?! It's not even any use to you. And I would be generous enough to give you twenty percent.”

Ruggie's tsum turns against him again, your tsum jumps out of your arms and throws itself at Ruggie-stum, hitting it. But it doesn't hit your tsum to retaliate, instead it tucks its tail between its legs and lowers its ears while your tsum seems to scold it.

Ruggie laughs at that situation and approaches you asking, also with his ears down and his tail between his legs, if you could give him back the envelope. But you reveal that, knowing him, you knew that he was not taking care of the tsum, but rather taking advantage of it to earn more money with its work.

“Hey, The tsum was the one who wanted to work for m- I mean with me. We earned that money by working together by choice.”

“So why not split it fifty-fifty?” You suggest.

“WHAT?! Are you cra-”

“If one of you worked as hard as the other then you deserve the same amount, don't you?”

He tries to bargain by reiterating that Tsums don't need to eat, but you continue the discussion saying that if it's not like that they won't stop fighting and it will never be resolved. If Ruggie keeps rejecting ot, your tsum will throw itself at his head to hit him. And then he will finally give in and split the money 50-50.

After that your tsum will convince Ruggie-tsum to just rest with it, trying to push it onto one of the lounge chairs. But instead Ruggie-tsum seemed to want to play with your tsum and the two of them started play fighting like two cubs. Which ends up looking more like they are hugging and cuddling.

Ruggie comments that despite what happened they seem to really like each other. After playing with each other for a while, Ruggie-tsum will come over to you to see if it can get some petting from you for being so cute. And if so, it'll turn over on its back so you can give it belly rubs. Ruggie will tell you that you're spoiling his tsum while trying not to show that he's jealous.

You find out that a Tsum similar to Jamil has appeared and is with him in Scarabia by crossing paths with Kalim while you were taking a walk with your Tsum around the school campus. Needless to say, Kalim was super happy to see your tsum again.

On the way to Scarabia you could feel the enthusiasm of your tsum. When you arrive, Jamil and his tsum are in the lounge playing a card game.

The two Jamils realize that someone has entered the lounge. They look at whoever has entered just to greet them, but as soon as they see that it is you, they both smile.

“Hello (Y/N). I see your tsum is back.”

Your tsum jumps from your arms and approaches Jamil's tsum. When it gets close enough, they brush each other's cheeks. Jamil blushes and pulls his hood a little tighter.

They will finish the game they were playing and then invite you and your tsum to play with them. You will play against your tsum, Jamil will teach you and his tsum will teach your tsum while you both play. Jamil will try to make you win, while Jamil-tsum is trying to make your tsum win. And perhaps for this reason, he teaches you by whispering in your ear so that the tsums don't hear your plays. Even if you don't win, Jamil will say that you played well and will be happy that you understood how to play.

You play two or three more times. Whenever you or your tsum win, it's because Jamil and his tsum agreed to lose to see you both happy. But in the last round Jamil-tsum climbs onto your lap while your tsum goes onto Jamil's lap. Thus forming pairs for the last round.

While Jamil-tsum helps you with the best moves, Jamil asks your tsum for its opinion with a cute smile. They both know that your tsum can't help him win, but he enjoys interacting with it in the same way he enjoys interacting with you.

The two teams end up tied. There is a good chance that the bouth Jamils planned this result.

You were going to get up so Jamil could prepare something for the two of you to have a snack, when you heard something. The sound of an insect coming in and cetting closer to you. Jamil jumps and runs to the door leaving your tsum behind while his tsum uses you to hide. You feel it trembling against you. The insect lands on one of your cards and you see that it is a... little ladybug.

If your reaction is something like, ‘Aww, a cute ladybug.’ Jamil will complain, outraged.

You ask Jamil to bring you some jar with a lid with holes and leaves inside. When he asks you what for, you say that you're going to put the ladybug inside and release it in Ramshackle Dorm's garden. He thinks you're crazy but that's okay as long as you lock that thing up and take it away. He brings you an empty spice jar with two leaves inside. You ask if they are poisonous plants, he sighs and says no. You smell the leaves and they seem normal.

The ladybug was on your finger, you open the jar to put it inside but it flies back towards Jamil who screams and runs away again. When the ladybug returns, it goes after Jamil-tsum, who also starts to run away through the lounge. The ladybug finally lands on your tsum's head and the two of you put the insect in the jar and close it. You tell Jamil it's done.

When he comes back, you try your best to contain your laughter as you remember him running away from a ladybug, but he notices your little smile and looks at you sullenly, despite thanking you.

Something similar seems to happen with the tsums, but your tsum dosen't contain its laughter and Jamil-tsum attacks it with what appears to be tickles. After your tsum surrenders the two seem to start cuddling each other.

Jamil is embarrassed by this and pulls his hood even further to hide his blushing face.

You were walking around the school campus with your tsum in your arms when you arrived at the Courtyard. A group of Pomefiore students focused on photographing something separated you from Vil and Rook on the other side. You and your tsum noticed that they were photographing Vil's tsum, and it seemed to be enjoying the photoshoot itself.

Your tsum jumps from your arms to the ground and tries to pass between the feet of some students to get closer to Vil-tsum. But those students notice something moving near them and look down at your tsum.

“Aw, it's another tsum.” One of the students says.

“Yeah, but this one doesn't look like anything special.” Another student comments.

“In fact, it looks so ordinary.” A third student agrees. “Could you please not interfere with Vil's Tsum photos?”

Your tsum still tried to advance a little further, but the students stopped it by putting their feet in its way. And even if you were complaining, they didn't care, they were in the middle of a photo shoot, the staff and spectators shouldn't interfere.

“Listen, if your tsum was half as beautiful as Vil's tsum we might still consider it, but I don't believe his tsum would even want to be seen with yours.”

With this, your tsum becomes too sad to keep trying and returns depressed to you. It doesn't even jump into your arms, you have to bend down and pick it up.

Meanwhile, the photo shoot stops abruptly and you hear some students say: “What's wrong?”, “Why do you want to stop suddenly?”, “Did we do something wrong?”, “Have we crossed boundaries?”

You see the students in front of you make way for Vil's tsum. When it sees you, its eyes shine, but when it sees your tsum, sad and curled up in your arms it gets upset and turns aggressively towards the students.

They realize that the tsum is upset with them for insulting your tsum, but it doesn't know which one was and they start saying it was the other one.

“You're the one who said it didn't look like anything special!”

“’In fact, it looks so ordinary.’ that's what YOU said”

“And who said their tsum wasn't even half as beautiful as Vil's tsum?”

“At least have the decency to admit your rudeness.” Vil appears, also unpleased, and with Rook beside him. “None of you have the right to decide who can or cannot approach the tsum. It is the one who decides who deserves such a privilege.”

“What a disappointment to have dormmates with such little tolerance for other unique types of beauty.” Rook says sadly. “And so insensitive too. ‘I don't believe his tsum would even want to be seen with yours.’ Which of you has the courage to claim such a phrase?” Rook looks at the three main suspects with an amused smile but a menacing look.

Both Vil and his tsum got angry upon hearing this.

“It was him!” The other two pointed to the culprit.

“It is also quite ugly to denounce someone so shamelessly.” Vil rebuked them and clapped his hands decisively twice. “The photo shoot is over. Go back to your duties. And the three of you have a meeting scheduled with me later in the Pomefiore dorm. Do I make myself clear?”

“Y-yes Housewarden. We regret our words.”

“I sure hope you do. But that won't lessen your punishment. You may go now.”

As the Pomefiore students leave, the others glaring at the three who insulted your tsum, Vil-tsum turns back to you and jumps into your arms, knowing that you would catch it. It cuddles up to your tsum as if it were comforting it, rubbing their cheeks and giving it kisses, or at least that's what it seemed like since tsum don't have mouths.

“How can they belittle such a demonstration of love and such a beautiful couple!” Rook says dramatically. “Je suis choqué!”

When you start having trouble holding two tsums at once, Vil approaches you and puts his arms around yours to help you.

“I am deeply sorry for the atrocities you heard.” He tells you in a soft voice but then smiled smugly. “You can help me think of an appropriate punishment if you like.”

Knowing that you were having difficulty holding them, your tsums end up jumping from your embrace to the ground. Your tsum still looks a little sad and Vil's tsum doesn't take its attention away from your tsum.

“Don't listen to them.” Vil says to your tsum. “Just because you don't fit their standards doesn't mean you're not beautiful. You should only care about the opinion of those who you really care about and who care about you.” He looks at you. “They are right about one thing, you two look ordinary.” He will smile in amusement if you look at him sulkily. “But who said that was ugly? The beauty of the ordinary is the most difficult to perceive, only those who truly recognize it deserve to appreciate it. And if you want to know my opinion, two extraordinary things become flashy, but one common thing brings balance and harmony. The kind of thing whose value and importance you only realize when it disappears.” He looks back at your tsum. “Don't listen to the opinions of ignorant people.”

Rook was crying with emotion and murmured how beautiful that moment had been. Your tsum, also moved by his words, jumps into Vil's arms. He almost got a fright, but he caught your tsum.

“*sigh* How cheeky.” Vil said, smiling softly. He holds your tsum as if he were holding a beloved baby.

Vil-tsum approaches you calmly, with an aura of dignity and sophistication. You lower yourself, kneeling on the ground and it climbs onto your lap. Like a cat demanding in the way you pet it.

Vil-tsum won't let anyone else take a picture of it unless they want to take a picture of it and your tsum together. If your tsum is too shy and doesn't want to take pictures, then Vil-tsum will also refuse.

Vil's tsum will try to convince him to give you and your tsum a beauty treatment. And if it doesn't succeed the first time, he'll steal Vil's cosmetics for your tsum. But since it's you, Vil ends up accepting.

Vil will have to keep an eye on Rook because he will become obsessed with your tsums together.

Your tsum was restless in Ramshackle Dorm and seemed to want to go somewhere. You picked it up and let it lead you out of the dorm. Your tsum made you pass through the Botanical Garden and the Alchemy Workshop until you reached the Hall of Mirrors, where it made you pass through the mirror that lead to Ignihyde. Once inside it doesn't take long for Ortho to appear to greet you.

“Hi (Y/N)!” He looks at the tsum in your arms. “Oh! You're back too. It's great to see you again! Are you here because of my big brother's tsum?”

And now you know why your tsum wanted to go there. Your tsum nods its little head. Ortho doesn't even bother to tell you where they are because they can only be in one place, but he says he'll have to leave because of the meeting with the Film Research Club and wishes you luck in dealing with his brother and his tsum. You go to Idia's room and knock on the door.

“Ortho? Did you forget something?” Idea asks instead of opening the door.

“No. It's me, (Y/N).”

He stammers your name in surprise. “W-w-w-what are you doing here?!”

You explain that your tsum was the one who took you to Ignihyde and that Ortho told you that an Idia lookalike had also appeared. Suddenly you hear a commotion inside the room and Idia asking in panic what it was doing.

The bedroom door opens. You see Idia lying on the floor in the middle of the room and in front of you an Idia-tsum staring at you. When your eyes meet his, his own sparkle and the blue in his hair takes on pink hues at the tips.

Your tsum jumps out of your arms and lands right on top of Idia-tsum. What no one expected, not even your tsum, was that Idia-tsum's reflex would be to take advantage of this to take your tsum, as if kidnapping it, to a kind of fortress made of cardboard boxes in the corner of the room.

“Welcome to the club.” Idia tells you as he stands up. “It also kidnapped my tablet. Now it has two captives.”

As soon as you enter, the door closes behind you again. You go to the cardboard boxes, kneel down and look inside. You see, through a gap in the boxes, the two tsums very close together playing a co-op game on the tablet.

“S-sorry about that.” Idia tells you embarrassed. “I can't get along with this tsum. I've been trying to get my tablet back for hours but it is so stubborn. ...What? Why are you looking at me like that?”

You think about it and say that if they stay calm like that until it's time for them to go back to their world, there shouldn't be any problems, right?

“OF COURSE THERE IS! MY LOGIN BONUSES! Why do you think I'm trying to get my tablet back?! Listen, I don't care what the tsums do as long as they don't cause me any problems or interfere with my games. And this tsum manages to do both. My room wasn't this disorganized before, but it keeps fighting me. You're good with delinquents, help me!”

If your tsum is really like you, it wants to get Idia-tsum out of those cardboard boxes like you want to get Idia out of his room. Which means if you have an idea you know your tsum will help you. You think about that co-op games and how Idia can be competitive when he believes he have a good chance of winning. Aka: in video games.

So you have an idea, but to do so you have to whisper the idea in the Idia's ear so the tsums don't hear. When you get closer he gets flustered. You suggest playing a 2 vs 2 game and invite the tsums to play, and encourages him to be as provocative as possible to ensure that his tsum accepts the challenge.

“And then what?" He whispers back to you "We'll have to entertain it while I get the tablet back.”

“I can handle that part.” you guarantee him.

You both follow the plan, luckily Idia has 4 controllers, probably because they are all different models. At first, Idia-tsum doesn't fall into the trap, but soon Idia's smugness kicks in

“Of course you don't accept the challenge. You don't even have opposing thumbs, how could you beat us?” The boxes move. “Or is it because you're a noob?” The boxes move again and it looks like Idia has an idea for the ultimate strike. “Oh, I see, it’s because your teammate is a normie who sucks at games.”

One of the boxes jumps like a spring and almost hits Idia in the face, as if whatever was underneath it had exploded. Idia-tsum jumps towards one of the controls with an irritated look and his hair completely red. Idia himself gives one of those scared YEPs, but for some reason he smiles when he sees that reaction from his tsum.

Your tsum jumps to the other controller next to Idia-tsum who looks at it and waves like a true duo preparing for battle. Idia gets prepered beside you and gives you a similar determined smile before he starts the game.

During the fighting game, it was as if Idia had forgotten about his tablet and whenever it seemed like you were having trouble he would get upset on your behalf and defend your character with his. His tsum did the same to your tsum.

It was only at the end of the round that Idia suddenly remembered the tablet and jumped out of his chair to pick it up from the floor next to the cardboard boxes. His tsum did the same thing, but you managed to catch it in time and held it in your arms with a strong hug. It struggled at first, but when it remembered that it was you who was grabbing it, its hair turned completely pink and it covered its eyes with its little hands.

“I collected...”  Idia raises the tablet in his hands. “The Tablet!”

He looks at you with a triumphant smile, but if you are giving his tsum affection and kisses because it’s so cute, the tips of Idia's hair will also turn pink and he will be flustered.

Your tsum will jump right up to his face and give him some affection too, like rubbing its little face against his cheek.

“H-h-h-h-have you never heard of personal space?!”

You were walking with your tsum in your arms around the school campus when Lilia suddenly appeared.

“You're back!” Lilia surprises you and your tsum by appearing upside down in front of you. “Hi (Y/N)-tsum. It's so good to see you again. This is actually perfect.” He turns around and puts his feet on the ground. “You see, a Malleus-like tsum also appeared.” You feel your tsum move happily in your arms. “And Malleus decided to throw a party for it. I was looking for you to invite you, but now that I see that your tsum is back I know that both Malleus would love to have both of you at the party.

Your tsum gets so excited that it almost falls out of your arms.

“Good thing you're excited, because we're already late. Come with me. The party has already started.”

Lilia accompanies you and your tsum to Diasomnia. The lounge is full of Diasomnia students paying attention to Malleus and his tsum. Lilia asks you to follow him down the stairs and when you reach the last step the students in front of you look at you and respectfully make way between you and the two Malleus. Like soldiers taking positions on both sides of the road.

The two Malleus look confused to see what the students were doing and when the two tsums' eyes meet your tsum jumps out of your arms and hops towards Malleus-tsum very quickly. Some of the students (Sebek included) took one step forward to stop your tsum from "attacking" Malleus' tsum, but stop immediately at Lilia's signal.

Malleus-tsum did not move, excitedly waiting for your tsum to reach it. Your tsum did indeed attack Malleus' tsum, but with love and affection. Your tsum gave it a lot of affection and Malleus' tsum simply accepted it with smiling eyes, only occasionally reciprocating the affection. Malleus also looked at your tsum with a special affection in his eyes.

You approached the tsums to get a better look at Malleus’s. It approached you with that dignity that Malleus himself also has, looked at you for a few seconds and bowed. All the other students at Diasmonia suddenly did the same. Even Sebek, although he did so a little reluctantly.

You bowed back and asked if you could pet it. The other students looked at you again with extreme attention and some held their breath. Malleus-tsum pondered, creating suspense in the lounge, but then it made that happy tsum sound and jumped into your arms, super happy. It accepts any and all affection coming from you and it doesn't matter how strong your hug is, just like Malleus his tsum is also extremely strong and resistant.

Meanwhile, your tsum also jumps into Malleus' arms without warning. Hence the students' gasps echoing through the lounge.

“So fearless, jumping towards me like that.” Malleus smiled smugly. “You really don't fear that I might crush you?”

The other students were wary, but your tsum didn't seem to care what he was saying and jumped onto the top of his head, nestling between his two horns. Once again the students gasped in fear. Only Lilia and Silver were calm. Lilia was laughing.

“My liege, please forgive this insulting-” Sebek said, but was quickly interrupted by Malleus's good-natured laughter.

“How cheeky. I wonder who gave you permission to go up there.” He raises his arm to bring his hand closer to your Tsum in his head, touching its little nose affectionately before patting its head.

While you were hugging Malleus-tsum, one of its horns stung your cheek. It immediately stopped and looked at you worriedly when it heard you say ‘ouch’. When it realized it had hurt you, its little eyes watered. You said it was okay, that it hadn't really hurt you, it was just a little sting, you were fine, you hadn't even gotten a mark. But even so, you had to keep comforting it.

After that, Malleus-tsum wanted to dance with you and Malleus with your tsum. You did so. And the next one, the two tsums wanted to dance together. Following this same logic, Malleus invited you to dance.

At the end of the party, when your tsum gets tired, Malleus-tsum will accompany it to you and Malleus who are sitting together. But your tsum will lie on Malleus' lap, and he will pet it lovingly. Likewise, Malleus-tsum will lie down on your lap, even if it is not tired. It is extremely happy for you to pet it.

Malleus laughs happily when your tsum turns over onto its back so he can give it belly rubs.

Malleus-tsum looks at you and Malleus and thinks you're not close enough. It jumps from your lap to your side and gives you a little nudge on the leg with one of its little horns. You jump and lean against Malleus. You apologize, but Malleus still puts an arm around you. And now satisfied, his tsum returns to your lap, which is so close to Malleus' lap that the two tsums can nestle together too.

You were walking around the school campus with your tsum, but it got tired of always walking in your arms and now it was jumping around by your side.

You were crossing the bridge that led to the Mystery Shop grounds when your tsum, who was jumping on the edge of the bridge, slipped and fell into the water below you. The current took your tsum to the lake in front of the Hall of Mirrors building, you followed it running. Your tsum managed to grab onto a ledge in the rocks very close to the waterfall.

You didn't know what to do. You couldn't get down there and there was nothing to help you.

But at that moment something jumped into the water near your Tsum, grabbed onto it and grew so big that it was blocking the passage to the waterfall. It was Silver's tsum!

And speaking of him, Silver appears right after and uses his magic to make your tsum levitate and fly back into your arms. But what about his tsum? The water coming from the lake was accumulating and creating more pressure on the tsum.

But the two Silvers seemed to understand each other well and the Tsum quickly returned to its normal size and let itself fall down the waterfall, but Silver managed to use his magic to catch it in the middle of the fall and bring it back to land safe and sound.

Your tsum jumped out of your arms to hug Silver-tsum, who hugged it back, or at least the tsum version of a strong and affectionate hug.

If you do the same to Silver to thank him, he will be surprised at first, but will hug you back gently with a smile on his face.

“I'm glad you and your tsum are safe now.” Silver tells you. “My tsum and I fell asleep nearby. We both woke up to the sound of something falling into the water and your fright.”

Neither your tsum nor silver's tsum wanted to let go of each other.

“Were you heading back to your dorm? We will accompany you.”

He used his magic to dry your tsum and you for grabbing it right after it came out of the water. Your tsums seemed to agree on something and then your tsum jumped into Silver's arms while Silver-tsum jumped into yours. Your tsum was nestling in Silver's arms, while his tsum was on guard and alert to your surroundings.

“I think they want me to protect your tsum while my lookalike protects you.” Silver assumes, placing his arms protectively around your tsum.

You go to Ramshackle Dorm together and as soon as you arrive in the lounge, your two tsums go to the sofa and snuggle up very close. And now in a safe place and next to your tsum, Silver-tsum falls asleep very soundly. Both you and your tsum find it funny how soft he looks when he sleeps so deeply.

“There goes another attempt to stay awake for as long as possible.” Silver says smiling, also finding it funny. “But I can't blame it. I also feel very relaxed around you.”

You stay with your tsums in the lounge. There's a good chance Silver will fall asleep next to you. Or on your lap if you let him.

If you would like to read more from me, you can find it in my pinned post: INDEX

[justladders]

First off, I want to second the thing about tiktok. Unless it is literally your job to market for a company or something, that platform is so extremely blood-sucking. Beyond everything else about it, creators are forced to constantly post, constantly shift to do what's popular for attention in the algorithm, etc. An incredibly easy way to burn out and be down on yourself if you aren't keeping it up. Just don't do it.

But what I find to be very important to realize and applicable to a lot of artists is that, because of what they have seen or been told, they have started to prioritize numbers over what they originally went online for: sharing.

It is incredibly easy on social media to compare yourself to other people -and their numbers- which is what everyone always says you should never do. One of my own friends mentioned to me that they were disheartened when something of mine got attention because their stuff "doesn't do as well." It's not that I don't understand why they want engagement, it's that the comparison is damaging and pointless because there will always be someone with a more popular post, with art that more people seem to like, with stuff that more people will engage with. What you have to realize is that doesn't make them "better." Even if you're considered a popular artist, there may be times where you make something that doesn't get as much attention as before, in which case the person you're comparing yourself to is yourself, which is still the same principle:

"Comparison is the thief of joy."

Share your ideas and your art that you enjoy, and the people that like it will find it, and people will echo appreciation and ideas, and a group or community of like-minded individuals may start to form, and you can make new friends, and you can find ideas/inspiration/new media through those people and what they share, and the list goes on. If one amount of engagement is higher than another, that doesn't stop any of this from happening anywhere else. And this could just be like 5 people. It doesn't have to be 5000.

A quick aside about Tumblr. I've been on a number of social medias to share art, but over time I always end up finding it incredibly easy to just drift off of those platforms. They always go the same way: "post, get some likes/shares, post again." Tumblr has been the only one where I've found actual engagement easier, especially in the form of asks, which is much more fun. It's like the difference between "passing a friend and waving hello" and "passing a friend, but stopping to ask about that new game they just got, make an in-joke, suggest a movie to watch later, then do a silly handshake."

Now, I want you to consider this - you, the creative reading this that is constantly comparing themselves:

Imagine that there was no way to check the "numbers" on the engagement you get. You can still see interactions and respond and whatnot, but there's no way to quantify it. And now imagine that there's no way for you to check other people's numbers. You can never know if anyone else's stuff has gotten more attention than you.

Would you be content with the people that are there that want to engage with you? If there was no metric for comparison, would you be upset about the amount of attention you aren't getting? Would you be happier responding to the engagement you do get if you weren't wishing there was as much as someone else?

If you find that this applies, I have a trick for you. Just pretend like the numbers don't matter so you can be happier. Then, through the experience of it, you can come to realize that they really don't matter. And then you won't have to pretend. And then you can be happy.

also we fucked up as a society the moment we started telling teens and aspiring artists to conflate being an artist with building a brand as if the two things are inextricable. the name of the game if you want to share your art is to work a job and sell yourself as aesthetizied content. back in my day we could just POST SHIT. to deviantart! what the fuck!

[esote-rika]

not a mask, but a reflection | Spencer Reid

Pairing: Spencer Reid x fem!Waldorf!Reader Category: idk hurt/comfort?? flangst? something like that, I'm sorry I truly don't know how to categorize this Summary: The BAU ladies insist on a makeover for Spencer, so you decide to indulge them by promising to take him shopping. It doesn't go as either of you expected, but it allows a chance for the two of you to form a deeper bond. Content: reader’s outfit is described, reader is based on Blair Waldorf in background, and personality– so you're rich!! and fashionable!! And snarky, but in a ride or die sunshine x sunshine protector kind of way, early season 2 glasses!Spencer crushing on reader, implied autistic Spencer, brief mention of his bullying, lots of dialogue!!! especially about fashion advice (PSA to wear whatever you want!!) Word count: 2.8k A/N: I'm back on my Blair Waldorf-reader agenda. I'm mainly writing these because of my own crackship, but I tried very hard not to describe any specific appearance stuff for the reader (aside from what ur wearing) so it’s as immersive and universal as possible! Styling in film and TV fascinates me and I wanted to explore Spencer’s character through clothes. ALSO! I incorporate a Blair Waldorf quote into the conversation that goes “Fashion is the most powerful art there is. It’s movement, design, and architecture all in one. It shows the world who we are and who we’d like to be.” pls know I didn't come up with it, the Gossip Girl writers did. It's from S4E13 specifically.

Saturdays are usually meant for curling up on his couch to read his favorite books, or marathon obscure foreign films. Alone, always alone, Spencer Reid has grown used to the feeling; accepted it, enjoyed it, even. He wouldn’t have survived all these years if he didn't appreciate his own company, after all. 

However, today is different. He’s expecting company, which is unusual enough, but he’s expecting you of all people. And it’s for such a silly thing too— a makeover. Something straight out of a cliche high school movie. It had started at work, during a case, a passing comment made by one of the people being interviewed. Something about looking like he’s playing dress up, spoken so softly he’d been willing to pretend to ignore it. 

But you heard it, had snapped at the man in annoyance about respect and propriety. At the jet, you had snapped at him about wearing clothes that fit better, and of course Morgan and JJ had to get involved, and Garcia squealed about a makeover over the phone. He hadn’t expected you to accept; when you did, he considered several ways to get out of it: pretend to have a date (implausible), pretend to get sick, just don’t show up. But then you said you’ll meet him at his apartment and his world seemed to come crashing down.

“I need to see what I'm working with before I dive headfirst into this,” was your reply when he protested. It makes sense, of course, but he's not happy about accepting you into his space. It's curated for him and his comfort, and he dreads the idea of casting your shrewd, critical gaze over his design choices. If he's less of a coward, he would admit that a small part of him desires your approval. Craves it, needs it, so much it makes his skin crawl.

So that’s why his Saturday morning is spent cleaning; straightening books, hiding the case files strewn about. He doesn’t want to give you any ammunition to tease him with. Having to undergo a makeover is embarrassing enough.

It reeks of bleach when he opens the door for you. The wrinkle of your nose has no business being so cute when it's obviously done to express disgust.

“What is that smell?”

“Hello to you too,” he can't keep the sarcasm from his tone as he steps aside. 

You saunter in heels even though this is meant to be a casual get together. They click against his hardwood floors until you reach his rug, the thick fabric dulling out the noise. “Did you bleach your entire place?” 

His expression is sheepish as he closes the door, “I figured I'd clean.”

“You sure you're not hiding a murdered body in here?” you walk straight into the middle of his apartment and look around. He winces as he waits for your verdict.

“I’m not, I just - you’re so -”

“I’m so?”

“Particular.” I don’t want to disappoint you, but he clamps his mouth shut before the words escape. Having you come in for a makeover already isn’t doing anything for his confidence. In fact, it just confirms his suspicions. Something is wrong with him, despite all the attempts at propriety and flattery otherwise. The BAU sees it, you see it, and you’re here to fix it. He swallows the lump in his throat, and with it, his pride and the tiny hint of resentment. 

You are trying to help, he reminds himself. 

Maybe it’s his hopeless optimism, maybe it’s desperation to seem normal for once, but it’s enough to surrender to your knowledgeable hands. 

He lets his eyes take you in, allows himself a moment to linger on the details of your ensemble. The picture of coordination, as usual; shoes and bag the same shade of rich brown, the barrettes in your hair matching the pale blue trimming along the edges of the sundress you’re wearing. This is you dressed down, he knows, but somehow you manage to outdress him. 

“I’m not even going to ask what you mean by that,” your eyes roll, before landing to one of the doors in his apartment, “Where’s your bedroom?”

He sputters, “My - uh, why?”

“I’m assuming that’s where you keep your clothes?” You look at him like he’s dumb, and he turns bright pink. “I told you, I can’t take you shopping before I see what you already own.”

He can’t believe he fully didn’t realize it meant letting you into his bedroom. But then again, his brain has the tendency to turn to mush when he’s speaking with you. “Right,” he nods, scrambling to his bedroom. All of his anxieties about his living room and the overwhelming amount of books seem distant now; you hadn’t even commented on them. Instead, this new one arises, bubbles in his stomach. Showing you his bedroom is so much more intimate. The space he sleeps in, where he’s most vulnerable.

A space no other woman has ever even seen. 

He feels your presence behind him, smells the distinct loveliness of the perfume you like to call your signature scent. Of course you don’t ask for permission. He’s found quickly that you’re used to taking and having what you want, used to the world yielding to you instead of the other way around. 

Your heels make sharp taps against the floor. Combined with your perfume, it’s already obvious that you’re making your mark in his room, his haven. He imagines the fragrance will linger when you leave, and it makes his ears burn with a longing that knocks the wind from his chest. The door remains open, and he’s thankful that he isn’t completely caged in his bedroom with you. 

“Here’s my, uh, where I keep my clothes.” he hastily opens his closet, relief flooding his body as he sees it’s not that messy. Everything is ironed and pressed, although some of his sweaters are haphazardly piled together. He hopes he won’t have to show you the mess that is his sock drawer. 

You step up beside him, bare arm brushing against his. Brows furrowed in concentration as you rifle through his clothes. He steps back to give you more room to work with, although it’s more for his sake than yours. Your proximity is making him a little dizzy. He finds himself slumping on his bed, watching your movements. You’re approaching the task at hand with the same meticulous acuity as you would in a crime scene. Focused. Detail oriented, even when doing something so insignificant.

He’s not sure what to expect. He’s bought his clothes based on what he sees other men wear, relying on his observation skills, and the clothing guidelines given by HR to deduce what is considered appropriate. His father wore dress shirts a lot, back when his family was still intact. Hotch and Morgan wear suits, but those have always felt too formal to use on a daily basis. He opts for cardigans and sweater vests to keep him warm instead, because they’re softer, less restrictive. They remind him of Diana, the things she would wear back when she could still teach. He hopes you don’t make him get rid of them.

“You wear a lot of light browns,” your voice lifts him out of his anxious stupor, “You have to give that up.” 

He frowns in confusion, “What’s wrong with wearing light brown?”

“You’re too pale, they make you look even more sickly. But if you must wear brown, lean into this shade instead,” you hold up a dark brown blazer that he actually really likes. He smiles, happy that it got your seal of approval. You turn to him, eyes narrowed, “And your dress shirts are too big, look at where the shoulder seam falls.” 

He blinks in surprise as your hand comes to touch an inch past the edge of his shoulder, pinching the fabric, “It should be up here. You’re too slim for an oversized look, it just swamps your frame. If you’re going to be wearing them, they have to fit you better.” 

He nods, feeling a little out of his depth, “How do you know all of this?”

“Years of consuming Cosmopolitan and Vogue.” You turn back to the closet, he frowns slightly. The words mean nothing to him, and he flinches when he hears you sigh.

“Fashion magazines?” you prompt, glancing back over your shoulder.

“Ah,” He nods, lips pursed, “I can't say those are on my reading lists.”

“Obviously not, otherwise you'd know not to wear,” You gesture at his entire ensemble, nose wrinkling once again, “This.”

It doesn’t really occur to him what the problem is as he looks down at his checked button down. “It’s a nice shirt.” he says, although he can see your point now; it’s too big. 

“Reid, you look like you’re about to start proselytizing about our lord and saviour Jesus Christ.” you say, stepping away from his wardrobe and stopping in front of him. 

Your teasing makes his cheeks burn. Or maybe it’s your sudden closeness, your hands at his buttons, “Um, what–” he’s stiff, memories rushing of being held down, clothes forcibly ripped—

“Relax,” you step back after undoing the top button. The annoyed scoff surprisingly gives him some comfort, reminds him it’s you, he’s here with you, “There, that’s better. Don’t button it up all the way.”

“Why not?”

“I told you, it makes you look like you’re cosplaying a minister.” He shifts under your gaze, feeling exposed, even though he’s fully dressed. But that’s exactly what you’re judging, after all, his clothes. There’s nowhere to hide. “Why are you so tense, Reid? It’s not going to make you look like a fool, if that’s what you’re worried about.”

Why? Where does he even begin? The fact that he’s never had a woman in his room before, and it’s making him feel like he’s about to implode? His memories of being stripped naked for all the school to see, humiliated, fueling the irrational fear of letting go of his clothes, the things he’s comfortable wearing. And for what? In order to be fashionable? To seem normal, to be fixed? 

He settles for a half truth, the words mumbled and embarrassed, “I like my clothes.”

To his surprise, your eyes soften, “Okay. And?”

“I like how I dress.”

“You don’t want to change your style?”

He looks down and shakes his head, feeling a little silly. How can he explain it to someone like you, who probably would have been one of his tormentors when he was back in school? It’s sick, this desire to be close to you, to be accepted by you as though being in your orbit would lessen his eccentricity. He thought he’d left it behind in high school, had grown out of it, but it’s there, recognizable and refusing to let him rest. 

“You know you didn’t have to say yes to this,” the bed dips as you sit beside him, “It was a silly thing the girls and I thought would be fun, but if it’s making you uncomfortable, I’ll stop and we could just, I dunno, go for ice cream instead.”

“No, I - I do, I just… don’t want to change completely.” It's almost pathetic how something as simple as clothes is making him spiral, “I like how I dress, even if you guys make fun of it. It’s comfortable. I get really cold hands, and the sweaters help, and - and the satchel is convenient even if you say it clashes with my outfits or whatever.”

Your hand rests on his forearm, and his rambling halts immediately.

“Then I won’t stop you from wearing grandpa-chic,” the lightness in your voice makes him smile, “This is why I wanted to see what you had. I wasn’t about to start from scratch, and there’s obviously a reason you gravitated towards these pieces. I wouldn’t force you into something you hate, that sort of defeats my fashion philosophy.”

“Your fashion philosophy?” He's smiling now as he listens to you.

“I believe that the whole point of fashion and clothing is to help reflect what you are on the inside, not mask it.” You reply, hand finding his own. He allows it, finding something warm and soothing in the touch of your hand, silencing the usual urge to pull away in fear of germs. “And, anyway, I think your clothes make you look really intellectual, so if you like them, you have the pieces in your closet already, it’s just a matter of styling them better.” 

You squeeze his hand, but he could have sworn you did it to his actual heart. 

He watches as you return to his closet again, rummaging through the clothes. You hold up a white button down and a navy blue cardigan, head tilted to the side, teeth worrying the plushness of your lower lip, “Like this; this is a nice combination, and it’ll work better with your complexion. Try it on.” they’re tossed over to him, landing on his lap.

You’re turning away from him, still going through his clothes—allowing him privacy. He appreciates that. He scrambles out of his current clothes, his skin prickling as he thinks about the fact that he’s in a room with a woman alone, getting undressed. No. You’re a friend and a coworker doing him a favor, he should get his head out of the gutter. Hurriedly, he puts the suggested ensemble on.

“Uh, it’s — you can turn around.”

He holds his breath as your eyes rove over his figure, still with the same sharpness he’s used to, but blunted by the small smile playing across your lips. “Yeah, that’s better. Navy’s a great color for you.” you have a stack of his shirts in your hand, all of them patterned and printed, “I’m sorry, but these… have to go. Or at least don’t wear them to work. The prints are ugly, no offense.”

He chuckles, taking the shirts from you, “Not wearing ugly prints to work anymore, got it.”

“Yeah, keep the funky patterns on your ties.” you reach up, brushing lint and dust off the cardigan, “Your shirts should remain plain, solid colors; you have a lot of nice sweater vests and cardigans, it’ll be easier to match them together if your shirts are in more basic colors.” 

Committing your words to memory is easy enough. Rules. He likes rules, but they need to make sense to him, otherwise their arbitrariness will simply frustrate him. “Why?”

“Why what?”

So far, you’re being so receptive to his questions, it might actually make him cry. It’s a new feeling, being the one who’s floundering. Not being the smartest, most knowledgeable person. How exciting, he decides, getting to learn in an area he’s never been able to fully understand on his own. He clarifies, “Why can’t I match the cardigans and sweaters to, uh, colorful shirts?” 

It’s a while before you answer, moving around to wind a tie across his neck. Your words are thoughtful when you speak, “It’s a visual balance. Too many colors and patterns can look heavy and distracting— which is okay, you know, but time and place is always something to consider when you’re dressing up. And you’re going to work, so it’s better to err on the side of caution and wear things that are more… sleek.” Your hands are deft as they tighten the tie, tucking it into the cardigan. “So now that I know what sorts of clothes you like to wear, it’s a matter of finding the right color combinations and cuts that fit your body. Here, see for yourself.”

You push him forward until he’s in front of his mirror, and indeed he does look… better. Still himself, still familiar, but the contrast of the navy cardigan against his pale skin somehow brings out more warmth from his cheeks and makes his hair seem less dull. Visual balance, you said. “Like art,” he murmurs.

“Exactly,” your smile is proud, peeking from behind his shoulder, “Fashion is the most powerful art there is. It’s movement, design, and architecture all in one. It shows the world who we are and who we’d like to be… and this is showing the world that you’re one attractive nerd.”

He laughs at that. There’s a lightness in his chest as he realizes he doesn’t have to change everything. “I think I get it.” he replies, meeting your eyes in the mirror.

“Of course you do, you’re a genius.” A slap on the back, one filled with warm intimacy, “Now, I did promise the team a makeover, so now that I know what sort of stuff you need, we can finally go shopping… and we need to do something with your hair.”

“What’s wrong with my hair?” he asks, but he’s smiling and so are you.

THERE WILL BE A PART TWO! Also, tagging everyone who expressed interest in Waldorf!Reader @mggslover @libraprincessfairy @lillaberry @lokisswiftie

[strawberrystepmom]

bakugou x f!reader. established relationship, a dad and the dog he didn't want etc. cw: non graphic death (side character, no cause of death mentioned), dogs. | wc: 2.3k, reading time: 10 minutes.

“Are you home?”

Generally speaking, being asked to confirm your location with Katsuki would give you pause to hear the little alarm bells ringing in the back of your head. His tone always gives him away which is why you are surprised that on this evening, it’s surprisingly…light? Perhaps even playful?

You decide to bite. There’s always a chance he’s read something about ways to keep flirting with your partner fresh, why not indulge him a little just in case?

“Where else would I be at 11 pm on a Tuesday?” You joke cheekily, dumping whatever seasoning you could find in the cupboard over the top of a bowl of freshly popped popcorn.

Dynamight’s evening patrol schedule for the month has left you both missing him and relishing in the few extra evening hours to watch only the trashiest of television without risking interruption. You can have your snacks, giggles, and a little extra couch space until he gets home near the turn of the hours into the next day, ready to shower and meet you between freshly washed sheets.

His patrol is definitely over, the digital clock on your microwave confirming that much when you look at it. The vibe seems even more strange now that you know he isn’t being rushed because he’s on the clock and he doesn’t seem hurt or angry…perhaps a little excited?

Tilting your head to the side, you toss a few kernels of popcorn into your mouth while his voice crackles through the speaker.

“Well, sometimes you go to that place—” preparing to launch into a monologue about the neighborhood izakaya that you love but he feels is shady, he pauses before he can begin. “Y’know what, never mind. I’m about to pull into the garage and need you to open the door for me when I get up to you.”

Placing the jar of seasoning down, you pin your phone between your shoulder and ear and clap your hands together loudly enough he can hear it through the speaker.

“Give me one sec and I’ll meet you down there!”

He scoffs, gliding into the garage and his parking spot. “No, it’s cold as fuck out here and…“

Hearing the shuffling of clothing through the speaker and the scuff against the floor he knows is the sound of your slippers being switched for outside shoes, he stops himself. You’ll know soon enough what he was trying to surprise you with, just a staircase away in your eager state.

“It’s a dog.”

He finally admits, exhaling loudly and gazing down at the zipper of his jacket where tufts of long fur poke out.

“I have a puppy with me.”

You squeal from the other end of the phone, predictably. A rumbling chuckle in his chest cannot be suppressed so he doesn’t bother, eyes still pinned downward toward the softly breathing lump snuggled against him.

“But,” he starts knowing very well you probably aren’t listening or have managed to make your way downstairs so fast he’ll hear you coming in a second. “We aren’t keeping it.”

Practically on cue, you fling the car door open.

“Don’t be ridiculous, if you brought it home it’s ours,” you respond, tossing your phone into the center console and sliding into the passenger seat next to him with a breathless grin.

You make grabby hands for the front of his jacket and he shakes his head in response, leaning his face forward and puckering up wordlessly. Pressing your lips against his, you smile against his mouth and cup his jaw with gentle fingers. Tilting his head so that his forehead is pressed against yours and your eyes meet. Smiling up at him, you steal another small peck and speak still practically stuck together.

“Hi baby love, how was your night?”

He steals another kiss from you and backs away to give his answer, unzipping his jacket further.

“There was an incident.” Your eyes widen in concern and Katsuki shakes his head, thumb stroking over the furry back of the little dog. “I’m fine, he seems to be, but his, uh…his person didn’t make it.”

Frowning, you look down at his chest and then back up at his face, solemn and handsome. Your thumb rubs small circles into his jaw, between his chin and lower lip, while you search for the thing to say that can make it at least a little bit better.

“Thank you for saving him,” you whisper. “And trying to save everyone else. Some things aren’t in our control.”

Of course he knows that and though a failed save with a fatality stings, the proof of how hard he tries snores against the cotton of his t-shirt. The reason he tries sits next to him in his vehicle. He’s safe and home but now he has to figure out what to do about this damn dog.

“I figured we could give him a place to be for the night and then I’d check to see if my mom is feeling up to a new project.”

Raising an eyebrow you drop his chin and card your fingers through the dog’s fur, your fingers slipping over his and resting.

“Let’s take it a step at a time. She may not even want a dog,” you remind, using your other hand to tug the zipper of his jacket down enough that it stirs the dog, his fuzzy little face turning toward the source of light just above your head.

A Pomeranian. You pout, finally being granted an audience with the very important little guy, nuzzling your face against his. That’s the last thing your boyfriend needed to see, his heart already softening with each passing minute toward the dog.

“Don’t get too attached.”

You aren’t sure if he’s talking to you or himself. You smile regardless, leaning to open the car door and escaping with the dog and a wicked giggle that echoes through the entire staircase as he follows you home.

━━━━━━━━

Somewhere between midnight and three in the morning, you managed to fall asleep sprawled across your bed. You ended up beneath the covers, of course, with Katsuki nowhere to be found but the small clanging sound of his beloved wooden spatula hitting against the side of a pan in the kitchen tells you that he’s up.

He may have never slept to begin with, preoccupied with what to do now that he impulsively saved something with no plan made about what to do next. It’s out of character for him and you could tell last night he was feeling strange about bringing the dog home. The last few hours may have softened his stance on parting with the animal though. Part of you hopes so while you roll over and place your feet on the ground at the side of the bed, stretching.

The slow walk from your bedroom into the hallway gives you a peek into the living room. You see Katsuki kneeling down on the rug, petting the dog with small and almost terrified strokes, a little bowl with an egg in it in front of him.

“Ah.”

The single sound assessment captures Katsuki’s attention, briefly pulling him away from, as he’ll claim, methodically checking the dog out for hidden wounds or burns. He looks over his shoulder, a single brow raised.

“What’s that s‘posed to mean?”

Shrugging and turning your head so that your smile can be hidden by your shoulder, you approach him from behind and kneel down to place your arm across his chest and your head on his shoulder.

“It means that I should probably go get this little guy a bed today unless he’ll be sleeping in ours. And some toys and, hm…food? Although I doubt he’ll complain if you decide that eggs will make up the largest part of his new diet.”

Looking down at the surprisingly calm ball of fluff in the middle of your living room floor, you wait for disagreement from the owner of the hands he’s currently between. Thick fingers precisely and gently continue to press against the skin beneath the small pup’s thick fur.

“No.” He shakes his head but catches his lips against the side of your face before completing a full turn. “But I need to make sure he’s okay. He needs to go to the vet and a real bath after that…”

Stifling a giggle, you only hum enthusiastically and beam in Katsuki’s direction. He can’t hide those softie tendencies for long.

“Didn’t they check him out last night?”

Nodding, he sighs softly. “Yeah, he ”didn’t get injured or anything," is what they said. Perfectly healthy.”

Keeping this little creature for even one more day will prove disastrous for him, his heart squeezing a little bit every time the shockingly brave for its size puppy looks up at him.

“I’ll tell you what,” you start, hand sliding gently down your boyfriend’s torso and his forearm where one of your hands meets his in the dog's fur.

“Let's invite your parents over for dinner tonight to get them acquainted. If your mom likes him as much as you’re pretending not to, he’s theirs.”

Another sigh from your beloved who seems surprisingly conflicted.

“Or you could just tell that I need to find someplace else for him to be and that we don’t have time for a puppy.”

Those giggles you’ve been stifling burst out of you all at once. Leaning against his side, you gaze up at him with a wry smile.

“If you wanted to be told no you certainly picked the wrong woman.”

The pretty gaze you wield against him so often shifts back to the puppy and he chuckles along with you.

“You’re right.”

You may not be the first to tell him no but somehow he managed to pick the exact kind of woman he needs.

One of his hands leaves the dog to dig for his phone in his pocket, searching for a vet who will see him without an appointment today.

━━━━━━━━

After being given a clean bill of health and the most thorough and highly rated washing in all of Musutafu, the puppy officially returned home with the two of you. There was a half-hearted attempt to offer him up to the people you hope will be your future in-laws, Mitsuki shaking her head and insisting that you’ll need the practice for when you have kids.

You shrugged her off yet a part of you felt obnoxiously smug about being foreseen as the mother of her future grandchildren. Until then, you’ll at least have the one that continues to snore and look around from his perch upon your boyfriends’ chest.

“You know how I knew he was ours?”

“Hm?” He responds gruffly, refusing to hide his annoyance over being caught from the beginning.

“When you actually agreed to the ridiculous demands of that vet.”

As though he’s been dying to rant about it, Bakugou scoffs and sits up halfway. You grin at him, laying on your belly across the bed to gaze lovingly in his direction while he holds the still unnamed dog to his chest and begins to rant, that furrow in his brow deepening with each level of disgust he enters.

“He wanted to call himself a hero for animals but only if I let his fourteen year old hold me hostage. Ridiculous.”

Sighing, you find it hard to disagree. A dozen photos later of your boyfriend with the dog and then just the girl and then the dog and the girl were what it took to get an appointment for the little guy today.

“Technically you started it by throwing ��this is Dynamight’ around.”

Rolling his eyes, he stops them and raises blond brows in your direction.

“It got it done though, didn’t it?”

With a smile and nod in response to his question, you shift from your belly to your knees and sit with them tucked beneath you next to him. He watches your every move, his free hand finding its usual home on the curve of your waist. You kiss his forehead and then change your focus on the puppy, scooping him up with your hands and kissing his little furry face.

“Can you believe that big mean fire tried to roast you like a chestnut, puppy?” You coo, curling his legs inward and holding him against your chest.

Katsuki tries to pretend like your terrible joke isn’t funny, looking away and squeezing your waist. He also tries to pretend there isn’t a very frustrating feeling tugging at his heart seeing you hold something so small and vulnerable that close to your heart that’s so big he’s surprised it fits inside of you sometimes.

The two of you sit in comfortable silence for a few beats, you idly singing a made up lullaby to the puppy who stares at you and he breaks it, gently tugging you in his direction so you’re sat nearly on top of him.

“Maybe Chestnut is a good name for him. He’s sort of the color of one.”

Grinning, you pull the dog away from your chest and hold him out and upward, toward the sky.

“Then dub your son Chestnut, Katsuki Bakugou.”

The seriousness of the request is absurd and he laughs, reaching for the dog and gently placing him back on his chest. “You did that with the cat too and he doesn’t see me as his dad, just a subordinate.”

“You got me there.” You admit, laying down beside him and nuzzling into his side. The cat who predates your relationship is nowhere to be seen but you imagine that he’ll be making an appearance to glare at the dog from your closet before the evening has concluded.

“Is he sleeping in bed with us again tonight?”

Katsuki sighs but it’s light, a serene smile on his face. “Well I told you not to buy a bed so I guess so.”

You snuggle into his side, kicking your feet against his calves gently, draping an arm across his torso to lavish the newest member of your developing family with affection he’ll have no choice but to become accustomed to.

[natalchartnurtures]

PAC: Your Person's Sexy (Thoughts+) Fantasies About You

Let's expose your person's unfiltered sexy thoughts about you *evil smirks*

Pile 1

A little about your person to see if u picked the right pile:

Ok wow I feel like your person is an incredibly deep person. They don't seem like that at all on the surface tho lmao. They might have a bit of an RBF (regardless of gender). They don't express HALF OF THE EMOTIONS RUNNING INSIDE OF THEM. I'm seeing an iceberg in my head rn; their energy is like that uk... that's just how they grew up. I'm also hearing that they may have mommy issues of some kind that you may or may not know of, or it's just that their mom is a very practical person and doesn't enjoy showing affection much, which would explain your person's lack of overt emotional expression. But BOY do they have some deep-ass feelings for you! Let's expose them together through this reading, yea? 🤭 (after their mini energy check)

They might have a spiritual streak to them, but idk if they are conscious of it or not (could be different for different people here). But in any case, they have a pretty strong connection to both their intuition and God-source or whatever they like to believe in. Again, they might not look spiritual AT ALL, but the way they move through life screams "I'm divinely led by God himself." Haha, love this person tbh. They're giving me Stoic-with-a-mushy-heart vibes. What a cutie pie.

They almost look at you as if you are a dream. Come. True. As if you were bestowed to them as a gift for making it so far in life. For all the hard work they put in to build their life, you're at the other end waiting for them to come home to you. Jeez, do you SEE HOW DEEP THEY FEEL FOR YOU? That was directly channeled wow... it's almost as if they worship the ground you walk on (in their mind, cuz they a lil stoic cutie pie).

Extra messages on the side: You guys may be in a relationship now or will be in one soon. You guys dream about each other a lot. They have a strong and intimidating aura. They seem very sure of themselves. They might really stand out to you, especially in a crowded room.

I was hearing a song while reading for this pile too—Never Be the Same by Camila Cabello. So excited!

If that resonated, let's expose your person's (unfiltered) sexy thoughts about you cuz now we KNOW they don't always show what they feel. 😏 This should be fun.

K, this is what I see. This person DREAMS about holding you down and dominating you in bed and letting allllll their sexual frustration out. Cuz remember spirit told us about how stoic they are? They hold back their sexual desires towards you as well, and boy are they extremely sexually frustrated. They fantasize about being a beast in bed with you, and as I SAID THAT, I saw them wanting to make the bed shake while fucking your brains out hahaha whoa... This person is intense for you, phew! They wanna let all of their feelings out with you in bed, and that's something they fantasize about. They might be into light BDSM too. They looooove the idea of choking you, or if they have, they looooove thinking about it OVER n OVER n OVER again lmao.

This person is wild for u. Ur like stuck in this person's brain. They're addicted, like in that song I channeled earlier Never Be the Same. It says, "blurring all the lines, u intoxicate me." Wow. If y’all have already had sex, THEY CAN’T STOP THINKING ABOUT IT, and if y’all haven’t, they can’t stop thinking about what it WOULD be like. They imagine putting you in all kinds of positions, they imagine how you'd sound when you moan, and how you'd look if they did something you liked. 😏🤭👀

This person is honestly tired of being so uptight and stoic in life, and you give them a chance to be free and be themselves, I heard. Aw, and that's why they're so hooked on you—cuz u give them life again 🥺.

This person LOVES you bro idk what kinda love spell u cast on them—they’re fucking WHIPPED when it comes to you. They fantasize about making you really wet and eventually making you cum. They love the idea of very wet sex with you (lol that's what I heard). You don't know what you mean to this person, and the only way they think they can show u is through physical intimacy and sex. One of their love languages might be physical touch. They loooove the idea of kissing and hugging and loving on you for hours. They love the idea of touching your sweet spots till you can’t resist them anymore. 🫠🤭

They love the idea of sneaking kisses and touches with u in public or semi-public places. They like knowing that they're the only one who can touch u like that 🫢👀🙆🏾‍♀️.

You're everything this person ever dreamed of. To them, you're the light of their life, I heard. They loooove your body, your mind, and most importantly your coochie cuz girrrrrl he be whipped by that kitty cat purrrr hahaahah. Or if you guys are reading for a crush—if you DO have sex, he WILL be (he doesn't see this coming at all 😈🤭).

He prolly fantasizes about you first thing in the morning and wakes up with a boner lmao. Or maybe he has wet dreams about you and accidentally wakes up at night (well it ain't your fault u cute n sexy af 🤷🏾‍♀️).

Side note: He prolly masturbates to you more than u think/know cuz he sure as hell would be out here pretending he doesn’t lmao.

Yea, to sum it up, you have ur person on an energetic LEASH, and they yearn for your loving soooo much—doesn’t matter if you have had sex or not 🙃.

Tehe, that's all I have for you today, pile 1! Stay eternally sexy and juicy I love you!

Pile 2

A little about your person to see if u picked the right pile:

Your person has MAD big dick energy—I love that about them. They're hot, abundant, and very giving. They make a hell of a first impression, I hear. They seem so extroverted lmao; they remind me of a Leo, n they may have big Leo placements. If not, it's just their energy. Tho to you, they SHINE like the sun. U love their vibe and especially their childlike aura ✨️.

They may have some energy vampires around that want them only for their light, and it really does take a toll on your person... but you're different. They see you as a kind and nurturing soul, and boy, do they appreciate you SO MUCH for it. They're very grateful for your presence. They love your voice too, I hear... something about you is so soothing... healing and feminine. Ugh. It's so beautiful! It's almost as if in a world where they get taken advantage of a lot, the thought of you is their oasis... their safe haven. Aw, they love thinking about you 💚.

Extra messages on the side: This might be a workplace/school/college crush. This person loves your work ethic and vice versa. They love looking at you, especially during work lol; u distract them, and they love it :p.

I was hearing a song while reading for this pile- "Marvin Gaye" by Charlie Puth and Meghan Trainor.

If that resonated, let's channel their (unfiltered) sexy thoughts about you!

First of all... you get their, ahem, horses RUNNING every time they see you. EVERY. TIME. Just something about you makes their body go nuts! Lol, they may have to hide their boners a lot at work/school/college 🤣.

It’s your feminine vibe tbh. You come off like an EMPRESS to this person—fucking irresistible! Gosh, they just wanna come and claim you for themselves and never let you go! You give them blue balls, I hear 😂 (aw, that's sad).

Oooh... they have baby-making fantasies with you. They love fantasizing about consensually nutting inside you—it makes them WEAK to think about that 😆😛💦.

They love your hair! They fantasize about pulling your hair in bed passionately while getting lost in your coochie, girl. Oooh, they might really enjoy imagining y’all doing doggy style a lot. Ughhh.

Your vibe feels very healing to them, and you feel very emotionally nurturing to them, as if you were made just for them. Ooh, I hear "Made For Me" by Muni Long if that resonates for anybody. That's how u make them feel! They love imagining themselves letting their guard down and just getting lost in you and with you, tehe.

They LOVE to fantasize about your boobies lol. They love your chest, boobies, and shoulders region. Oh! And your back as well—they could stare at them for hours 😆.

They fantasize about kissing and touching you in these areas especially, and... it keeps them up at night :p.

They love that you're different from the people they've known/come across in their life. They... fantasize about having healing pillow talks with you while y’all caress each other’s hair 🥺. Aw, this is too cute. Gosh... my heart—

Side note: This person has felt very misunderstood and lonely growing up, so with you, they fantasize about being accepted and loved for the very first time... sheesh. That's rough. My heart goes out to them. You're truly a gift to this person.

K, moving on. This person might really like your feet? Like fantasizing about giving you foot massages and maybe massages in general to take away your stress, to help you relax. They love the idea of TOUCHING YOU deeply. They might think u have really pretty skin, and they can't get enough of your touches (if u ever have).

They might fantasize about role-playing too? About you playing a damsel in distress, and they come in to your rescue, and then y’all cum together 🤭🤣.

This person might have a great sense of humor too lol.

Ooh, I heard they LOVE undressing you with their eyes... they might have really intense eyes, and your eye contact could really take you off to another dimension haha.

This pile is more emotional than it is dirty, so maybe y’all haven’t had sex yet. So, they kinda leave their fantasies open to possibilities, so there aren’t a lot of sexy details coming through.

But yea, this person feels an emotional connection with you, and it's so damn beautiful. More than anything, this person just wants to make sweet love to you... ugh, so precious.

That's all I have today for you, Pile 2! I love you, and stay sexy and sweet 🫂✨️

Pile 3

A little about your person to see if u picked the right pile:

This person might present as being super resistant to change. They might like their comfort zone A LOT and prefer to operate from it no matter what. They may have a stubborn streak as well. Honestly, they give me Taurus-in-the-lower-octave kinda vibes lol.

This person may like you but not overtly tell or show it to you? This may be my situationship pile… or many people in situationships have messages here. K, I'm also getting that this person might love partying and going out in general? May have a lotta friends and be very social in life, generally speaking. They might be someone who has commitment issues or they just struggle when it comes to romantic relationships, cuz it seems to me as if this person has yet to learn some hard lessons around romance and partnership. They may have player tendencies? (This isn't for all of you tho, you'll know if it's for you.)

They might enjoy instant gratification over long-term when it comes to relationships AS OF right NOW in their life. I'm getting that the universe sent this person your connection to help them mature 🤦🏾‍♀️ (isn't that fun 🙄).

Lol anyways...

Extra messages: situationship, FWB, sexting

Channeled song i heard while chanelling this pile: Ride It by Larissa and Jay Sean

If that resonated, let's channel their (unfiltered) sexy thoughts about you 👀🙆🏾‍♀️😈

Daytime sex. They loooove fantasizing about fucking you anytime they like lol. Something about that makes them sooooo horny lol. They fantasize about fucking you so good that you'll have no choice but to come back to them EVERY single time. They like to imagine "hitting it from the back," and you're all sweaty and up against a wall, and they have their hand on your mouth to keep you from screaming. (Goddamn that's hot!)

They may not have access to you right now, or maybe it's cuz you're both super busy people, but they wish they could have quickies or fun sex with you ANY time (this message be coming in STRONG lol).

They looooove watching your body when they do you (for those of you that have already had sex with this person). If you haven't, then they fantasize about fucking with the lights on lol. Something about watching you writhe under them and responding to their body just TURNS THEM ON HAARDD haha.

Also, I can't help but get an FWB vibe from this pile. Please take it only if it resonates. IF you ARE in an FWB situation, they ABSOLUTELY love it. They look forward to every time y’all are about to do it :p

This person may be quite emotionally immature, and so they have more sexual desire for you than actual emotion, but I feel like it's the same way for you too. I get a mutual, consensual vibe here. So if it’s not, please pick another pile, it’s OK. This pile ain’t for you, princess 🙂

I'm also getting that a lot of you have already had sex with this person, and THEY LOVE IT. They looove it when you ride it; it drives them WILD. And if you haven't, they drool over fantasies about it 👀🫠.

They love thinking about fucking you anywhere but on a bed lmao. Like, say, a car or in a parking lot? This person would have you anywhere and anytime, if they could—phew!

They touch themselves a lot when you're not around too. This is when their fantasies creep in like Santa through the chimney, and they think about having a chance encounter with you, giving in to each other's horniness, and getting caught up in the moment. They love spontaneously fucking. Some Sag energy coming through rn. They may love your ass and thighs too—gosh, they could love gripping it while doing you. Sheesh. You're the best sex they've had in a long time (your person's words, not mine), and they really appreciate your encounters being so mutual but fun at the same time. If that hasn't happened, that's what they want: mutual fun.

This person is never not horny for you lol.

That's all I got for you, Pile 3! This was steamy af! Stay sexy, and I love you 🫂

[artdcnaldson]

Can I say I want step dad Patrick to spike my drink 🙂🙂🙂🙂or are we not fucking w it

I’m fucking with it 💜

TW: Noncon, drugging 🚨🚨🚨 don’t like don’t read ok thank youuuuu <3

You’re embarrassing him at one of his family’s charity galas, and he usually wouldn’t give a fuck, but you just seem primed to piss him off. The low cut, trashy dress you’re wearing, the way you flirt with the goddamn bartender and dance like you’re in a fucking nightclub on the mostly vacant dance floor.

He’s gotten enough sly comments about how you’re old enough to be his wife, not his stepdaughter. Asking how he controls himself around you, and he just has to brush it off, saying he’s a married man and he loves his wife.

He loves his endless supply of money, because she's so happy to spoil her young, beautiful husband. He loves not being cut off by his parents, because they're proud that he made a good match and is acting like a grown up, for once in his life. He loves that he has you around the house; rich and bored and aimless, half naked, looking at him like your next meal. He loves that he has you and your mom to look at him like he means something, after an injury fucked away his last chance at getting a single major tournament under his belt.

He doesn’t know why he does it. But he has a few valium that he keeps in a little baggie in his wallet, just in case his shoulder starts acting up again, and you're just... really pissing him the fuck off. So he grabs two flutes of champagne as the waiters pass them around for his father's big speech, which is really just a thirty minute circle jerk. He crushes up a couple pills and sweeps the powder into one of the glasses.

"Here," he says, finding you near the back of the crowd, having been squeezed out by middle-management who want attention from the big boss. "For the toast."

You smile over your glass, pretty lips already leaving a glossy mark on the rim as you peer up at him. "My hero." There's a tiny twinge of guilt as you down the glass of champagne, when he knows there's a line that's been crossed that he can't exactly redraw. You wipe your mouth with the back of your hand and grab another glass of champagne. "It's on grandpa's dime. Who fucking cares."

It kicks in before the speech is even over. Your eyes drooping, your body stumbling and clumsy, to the point that you have to cling onto him for stability. "'m really tired," you murmur against his ear, so out of it that your lips graze against his jaw, and he can hear the sticky click of saliva in your mouth.

He has to haul you out of the party, with a few exasperated remarks about how embarrassed he is, and how he's going to get you back to your hotel room to rest. You doze against his shoulder in the elevator, nearly drooling on his nice suit. He half-drags you down the hall, thumbs through your clutch until he finds your room key.

You slump on the bed in the same position he drops you in— a puddle of silk and sequins, your dress hiked up your thighs, one of the straps fallen down your shoulder. You give a soft mmphf, eyes fluttering softly, legs going limp as you try to reposition yourself comfortably. But, god, even that's too much. effort.

You're so vulnerable like this, so sweet. You turn onto your back and he has to stifle a groan at the sight of your tits exposed by the loose, unkempt neckline, nipples pebbled in the cold air of the hotel.

It wouldn't be right to take advantage of you like this. No, that would be... it would be wrong. He didn't drug you so he could fuck you, he drugged you to get you to stop making a scene. That was... it was normal. Right? People gave their dogs Benadryl to keep them from freaking out sometimes. It was fine.

And any biological reaction to your unconscious body and your perfect tits was just that. Biological. And maybe also an effect of the millions of fucking tempting moments he's had with you.

It's not wrong if he doesn't touch you. That's what he keeps reminding himself as he pops the button to the fancy pants of his suit, as he spits in his palm and wraps his fist around his cock. It's fine, it's fine, it's fine.

You make a soft, sleepy noise as you shift a bit and it does him over entirely. He cums into his fist, making a mess of his boxers. He wipes his hand on the sticky fabric, cleaning himself up as best as he can. Before he leaves your room, he covers you with the duvet so you don't get cold.

Someone has to look after you, after all.

[bunybunn]

Alright the drama continues and somehow it got worse. I'm glad I found a transcript of Dream's video on twitter (by @/NORsevvy here it is if anyone wants to read it) and I want to annalise it a little because I can.

Let's start with the part where he apologised for r-word and if you think about if he did that right after he posted that stupid meme we wouldn't have this drama but that wouldn't be his style.

What icked me immediately what the way he used Tubbo's stream as if through all of it he was agreeing with Dream. Especially since Tubbo actually shared very similar sentiment to Tommy when he talk about how, sure he does agree with the dumb jokes their friends group makes but he still stands by them. Besides using Tubbo as a gotcha didn't sit right with me because let's be honest as much as he is one of Tommy's best mates so is Jack and that guy wasn't as nice when it came to Dream.

After that Dreams moves to Tommy talking about Dream and his friend group being sexist and immediately he skips over the context, which in this case was the George situation and no matter how you saw it they way they talk about the situation by immediately downplaying the accusations didn't make them look good. To add to the irony we learned thanks to Ludwig that, yeah actually Dream did called two different women "whore" and only defended (and not apologise mind you) himself about one of those.

Something that I found interesting is how Dream has tendency to got on the sarcastic rants about "what if there were bad rumours/jokes about you Tommy" as if that was actual genuine argument. All of this only to then to hold the fact Tommy interacted with Dream's friends after the accusations. All of this to then pull the Logan Paul messages to prove how insincere Tommy is... As if it wasn't a case of him losing respect to content creator he looked up.

Another funny bit in my personal opinion is how he showed clip of Tommy say Dream was holding his help over his head and Dream immediately proceeded to do just that by pointing out how they called for hours talking about YouTube with no exceptions(!!! 😮😮😮) and how Tommy at the age of 16 was grateful for it. He is trying very hard to make it seems like the good guy but just by looking at the way he puts is as arguments why Tommy couldn't criticise him or express how Dream made him feel back then very much is giving holding his kindness over other people's head. What makes it worse is the way he takes Tommy owning the fact that he was one of the people who were behind the success of the dream smp because he was the one who started the idea of making stream that have roleplay and plot. Having Dream use it as another gotcha to call Tommy egoistic for it was very dishonest.

Then you have the merch part of the argument and I will be so real there is no argument that wouldn't make selling yours baby photos to fans sound fucking weird. Funny enough Tommy never mentioned Dream's merch company scamming people he simply shared an opinion that he thinks Dream's merch designs are lazy. Additionally notice how Dream took Tommy's words out of context as he was comparing his work on writing a book, doing standup the legit way not relying on his internet popularity and making a proper podcast to Dream just putting out simple standard merch and using very weird ideas to make profits from it. Tommy has been growing and trying new things which yeah I would say are bit more impressive then making the exact same type of videos for years. Perhaps that's why Dream didn't like the video where Tommy was talking about how Internet in fact got worse because that's the Internet Dream is enjoying being stuck in.

Dream still not getting that massaging someone's mom is crossing a boundar despite being told that that's the case by more then one person feels so dishonest especially when he is framing it as if every one are unreasonable... He brought fucking c!Dream reference to prove it and one more clip of younger Tommy praising him as if that somehow made his point more valid.

All that to say that what Tommy felt about the way Dream treated him and how he acted was somehow not as valid as Dream using his response to do a very similar thing. There was a lot of me, me, me in Dream's video without even acknowledging that perhaps he was making other people dislike him with his own actions.

[iamverynormalaboutsge]

Those screenshots are for context as to why I decided to lay out my view on Aric and Japeth there and to also avoid repeating myself.

Now back to the grind! (I will put a 'read more' because this WILL be long, be warned)

Topics: Aric and Japeth's origins, the context of their surroundings, the perfect isolation and the communal influence

@liketwoswansinbalance take a cup of tea or an espresso shot, this is gonna be a while

I will lay out a few of my takes on these two characters before I move forth and talk about their relationship because I feel that if I don't some details will not be understood or they will lack, what I call, flavour!

First, let us start with Aric who I am more experienced with because, well what do you know? He's interesting to think about.

Of course, we have to begin with his origins. That means Lady Lesso and his unknown father who for whatever reason the fandom wiki assumes is deceased but we have no confirmation of that. Perhaps it's because after the 'We can't imagine anyone who would miss him' his father didn't appear yet again Nevers have a very different way of 'loving' their children. Aka it's practically medieval times royalty but without the money, make the baby 'pure' for the bloodline, and move on. In our case make a baby for your lineage(with a willing or unwilling participant or with a sacrificial goat to a demon to clone yourself like it happened in Hester's case) and then we see where the rest goes. Now there is no doubt in my mind Lady Lesso loved Aric and she still most certainly held motherly love for him when they reunited despite him wanting to murk at her and managing to do so in the end. She admitted she was never afraid of him and more so afraid of what he could do to the people she cared about. But she WAS afraid of him when she realised that he was not HER son anymore.

We know that Lady Lesso was afraid of Aric's father. Perhaps the whole 'let's make an heir for our bloodline' was mutual but something happened and Lesso wanted to keep her son and avoid her husband(?)/father of the child. It is funny to me how people assume Ares, the God of War, is his father and honestly? I could see it. Lady Lesso has this aura of power around her and I wouldn't exactly be shocked if the woman who deemed Sophie as truly evil despite all of her flaws would only be swooned off her feet by a literal God, similar to how Sophie was very eager with the prospect of a powerful lover and having therefore a power of position. However, Lady Lesso perhaps sought out more than just power. I believe Aric's dad simply wanted to take Aric for who knows what reasons and Lady Lesso, one of the most powerful sorceresses that we know of(because come on. She managed to make the powerful protecting shield Rafal did at his full strength. That takes something) was AFRAID to confront a 'simple' man.

Now how does this all play in Aric's story if he didn't even know his father? Well, genetics count. Dovey recognised Aric's father from her memories after meeting Aric who had a similar outlook on him. Therefore Aric being very eager for war, battle, and savage violence in general despite maintaining a certain level of discipline which IS needed to win a war regardless of how brutal, would justify the Ares theory.

We know Gods can be charming or persuasive, we saw the air of confidence and undoubtedly strength Lady Lesso carries herself, and we see it in Aric how he has no issue getting where he wants, how he wants it, and deceiving everyone along the way. Despite supposedly having no interactions with girls whatsoever, given that the timeline only mentions that Aric's interaction with a girl ever before ending in the Arbed House was with the daughter of the family that rescued him that he nearly killed(not to mention that I remember that he DID murk their family dog. Perhaps the fact that the family's daughter was 'so weak' paired with his recent trauma of being abandoned by his mother who he most likely loved the most led to his whole 'women are weak, frail and pathetic' beliefs).

Therefore, how does Aric go on to 'seduce' Sophie and Hester? Although he didn't exactly go somewhere with either of the plans he had in mind with Rafal punishing him for going near Sophie and Hester not faltering for the guy he got stabbed by(even if the stab was meant for Agatha), we still see he has some maddening skills in being a charming devil and effortlessly so. Let's not forget that he ended up captain of the boys against any better judgement from Tedros. Sure he broke through the magic shield and we see Tedros question it even if he never gets an answer from Aric on it. A completely strange boy showed up on his doorstep and he just- let him in despite the clear threat he possessed simply because he claimed to(and didn't lie) that he was there as well because like everyone else he had something in this 'game' to go after. We see Tedros acting aggressively to Aric when he loses his patience in regards to the whole 'start a war already' situation, being threatened to be kicked out, but THAT was after Aric already become Captain of the boys. Aric must have proved himself in a different way than just breaking the shield. I mean sure he managed to gather up some henchmen between the time he left the Albert House to the moment he got to the schools, and we know that Aric didn't exactly have any friends. He was persuasive enough to get some other aggressive individuals to follow him and potentially even make them obedient to him. We never know what happens to them after book 2 but most likely just like the other princes and boys they are thrown out/leave because they are no longer needed therefore Aric doesn't keep them around.

Where does this play in the whole Aric-Japeth relationship? It does. Sure, Aric is very conscious about what he does and what effect he has on people but he had to learn he could have such an influence on others, and who was his first 'victim'? I believe that to be Japeth. Now I doubt Aric was aware of what he was doing. He was just a boy, no older than six who had been abandoned and turned spiteful against the cold harsh world. We know NOBODY liked Aric. Rhian and Kei surely didn't yet Japeth did. And I think the reason Rhian and Kei didn't like Aric is for the same reason that Japeth did.

Aric's natural charm worked on Japeth as they grew up together and 'explored'. While Japeth's acts of violence until then were to terrify both his twin and mother to the point Evelyn Sader who was very determined to raise Rafal's children(and who she also carried willingly despite being abandoned) turned to leave them in the exact spot where hearts so evil that they would ruin the endless woods if they were to be properly trained in the School for Evil were hidden (another screenshot y'all).

Aric wasn't sent there by HIS blood nor guardian but rather by a family mortified by exactly this, a heart truly evil. He ended up there as an external factor who heavily influenced Japeth's perspective and views to the ones they were already being taught in the Albert House. That school's purpose is to redeem evil hearts like redeeming sinners in the Hazbin Hotel. However, the Arbes House had a far bigger success than we see happen with the demons from hell(weird parallel I know but you can't tell me it's entirely wrong given that Japan didn't do far more malicious war crimes than the characters we are presented in that indie animation). Anyway, as previously stated I believe that just as Aric's genetics made him charming, persuasive and manipulative, effortlessly with little to no struggle if I may, Japeth's genetics made him psychotic, prone to delusion as well as overly blinded sighted by his goal to account for all the details that may go wrong. These characteristics we seen in both Rafal and Evelyn.

We know that Evelyn was supposed to raise the boys and with the Mistral, sisters to help make them into what they are supposed to be. Japeth knew of his true nature while Rhian didn't and I don't think that it was Evelyn or Rafal to reveal that to him but rather the Mistral sisters AFTER Evelyn effectively abandoned the boys. I say abandoned because it wasn't until Evelyn saw how truly awful Japeth was that she was willing to truly drop this entire grand master plan despite carrying it so far. House Arbed specialises in hiding these evil souls from the schoolmaster himself therefore as far as Rafal was concerned in the context that he didn't exactly send monthly letters to his sisters, his sons were gone. Therefore even if Evelyn was still delusional enough to think he could be near Rafal, he rewarded her for helping bring him back or better said punished her for getting rid of his bloodline. It would make sense for Rafal to have noticed the impossibility of tracking down his sons the moment they stepped into the Arbed House which wouldn't exactly lead him to believe that there could be any magic more powerful than his to shorten his vision, because why would he? He never even considered that the students who loathed him could secretly work to overthrow him, or at least he didn't believe he'd get far so clearly while this is certainly a far stretch with the whole believing Japeth and Rhian are dead, it isn't entirely deniable. It would also make sense that after knowing of Aric, despite forcing the whole 'abandon your child or your career Lesso' he went off the radar when he got to the Arbed House just like it happened to Japeth and Rhian. Aric was evil just enough for Rafal to make him a DEAN on the SPOT despite having 0 experience whatsoever(outside the whole 'captain of boys)' and went as far as to give him the title of LORD.

I got a bit sidetracked but the point is Aric and Japeth were perfectly isolated and unbothered by any external factors in the Arbed House(perhaps the mistral sister keeping an eye on Japeth but not a lot more than that in the case of which Japeth and Rhian BOTH came in contact with the three only AFTER they left the Arbed House once they 'graduated' which could have been around the same time Rafal kicked the bucket, and Japeth was given more information than Rhian because the mistral sisters saw that unlike Japeth, Rhian's evil nature as little as it was ended up being stomped on and only Japeth was left with more authentic evil purity).

Japeth had violent tendencies but not out of any specific hatred or anger, but simply how he truly was we do not know whatsoever that Aric had such tendencies until after he was abandoned which would explain how compared to Evelyn who was mortified Japeth and willingly abandoned him and Rhian(perhaps Rhian too in the fear he could at any time turn like Japeth), Lesso had NO reason whatsoever to feel such genuine deep fear towards his son despite everything he did, despite the magic he inherited from her and the strength/mentality he might have taken from his father like Evelyn did. Lesso was afraid of Aric's father but loved Aric genuinely while Evelyn was supposedly madly in love with Rafal but FEARED Japeth. See the contrast?

Now that we have this cleared out we can finally begin the TRUE Aric-Japeth analysis as a WHOLE.

Japeth was corrupted by Aric. Yes, you heard me, Aric who undeniably is less evil than Japeth, is the one to have corrupted Aric and not the other way around. As I mentioned everyone saw it as troubling that Aric and Japeth interact with each other and given that it was Aric who ended up going to extreme lengths and being kicked out, rightfully so to think of it. Aric and Japeth only had each other as friends. Japeth was wicked by nature and birth, and Aric was wicked by his surroundings. While Japeth was relatively kept tame, that most likely changed the moment Aric came along. Aric who despite not being as horrible could NOT be contained(Just like Lady Lesso outright acted on betraying Rafal in the favour of the balance instead of just Evil).

Aric was also the first one to do an actual proper kill and not just torture or frighten as Japeth did to his brother and mother. Aric was the one to go the extra mile the moment he was pushed while Japeth despite all his wickedness never did such a thing or considered it even UNTIL Aric came into view and did as far as nearly killing Rhian. I mean a stab to the head-? Rhian had a hell of a skull not to die from it. A parallel to the False Rafal/OG Rhian on how HE had no issue with Hook eliminating competition but he wasn't able to do so himself until he was corrupted by external factors and did it himself at the end of the prequels by killing Rafal.

Likewise, Aric had an unconscious influence on Japeth. Aric had this natural attraction to get his way through. He got Tedros to place him as the Captain of the boys when Chaddick failed Tedros. He got Rafal to make him the new Dean/Lord of New Evil. He could have easily persuaded Sophie if Rafal didn't catch him in time and I dare say that even Hester was more than likely stunned enough by Aric's shenanigans for his action to still count as effective in playing with the victim's mind. However, while Aric was in conscious control of all of this, he never realised how he influenced Japeth. He was just growing, exploring who he was as a person and Japeth was the first-hand witness to that. Aric is more in the spotlight. He is in the shadows enough to not be noticed until it's too late but in the light enough for people to know to keep clear of him even when it is unclear the full extent of his power. Japeth is more of a shadow villain. He has no desire to step into the light, no need to put himself on display or hurt people just for the sake of it like Aric does, instead he does so by his simple nature, unconsciously.

And when growing up, a child takes from what they see around them including other children. Aric's naturally charming and suave behaviour put a spotlight on him from Japeth's perspective. One bright enough so that to him everything else becomes irrelevant as long as it's not related to Aric. If Aric didn't die I highly doubt Japeth would have helped Rhian with everything because he wouldn't have a reason to. Rhian wouldn't have what to bribe him with, even if Rhian didn't know he was beating Japeth out with the promise/idea of bringing back a person who most certainly everyone in the Arbed House despised. (Also the fact that Aric tried to kill Rhian and Japeth was dead serious on seeing Rhian choosing his safety over Japeth's happiness as a betrayal when he decided that Aric is to be kicked out. I mean I doubt it was Rhian's entire choice but that is the way Japeth saw it. Rhian chose himself over him so why should Japeth ever do otherwise for Rhian?).

Now that we established who wore the pants in the 'relationship' and as to HOW and WHY this is, let us define the status of it.

Japeth loved Aric. No doubt. I mean, having a magic space where you scribble your initials EVERYWHERE? I believe Japeth IS aware of how B+C scribbled on anything is usually a sign of romance or at least a very deep feeling. We see Rhian saying that Japeth considered Aric more of a brother than him, however, we then see Japeth ask decoy Aric for a kiss as a trap. Japeth was aware of his feelings towards Aric and so was Aric. However, Aric rejected that part of Japeth. In this regard, Japeth took after Evelyn's delusion that someone who didn't love him the way HE wanted it to, could ever, and also took after both Rafal and Evelyn, with Japeth believing that if he were to bring Aric back he could make him love him. (Rafal who thought he could make Sophie genuinely love him outside of desperation. Also, Evelyn who had thought that being of service to Rafal would gain her anything in her favour).

Japeth is the more powerful one in any aspect but mentally, whereas Aric in contrast naturally shines in through with his 'good' genetics. Japeth doesn't even think of stepping over Aric's authority over him, he lacks that rebellious spirit that Aric shines in. Aric dominates because he wants to. Japeth ended up dominating others because that was what was needed to get the one person he ever loved back. Japeth obeys Aric in his wishes, but during the scene where Tedros pretends to be Aric, we see that Japeth, from the demanding and cold snake, turns into a pleading puppy desperate for affection. He was right there and then ready to accept everything decoy Aric said if he didn't, to his credit and cunningness, test to see if this was even HIS Aric that he is so desperate about. Once he saw it wasn't his Aric, Japeth's delusion settled back in.

I highly doubt that the interaction would have gone any differently. Tedros didn't truly know Aric but he knew how he acted enough to realistically impersonate him for somebody who knew Aric on a far deeper level. Although he certainly must have had a flaw if Japeth decided to test out if this was Aric or not(outside of the fact that Aric was dead because we did later see Arthur talk to Tedros in the plane of dreams/magic so it's not wrong to think Japeth might have truly considered that decoy Aric was indeed Aric talking to him from the realm of the dead).

Now we established the relationship from Japeth's point of view + the view of everyone else but what about Aric? Now we know the romantic side of love was one-sided. We do know that Aric would send letters to Japeth, begging to come to him because he felt off without him, but I doubt that this was because of romantic feelings. Japeth states Aric was ashamed of their love, but this could be his perspective and rather Aric was ashamed of Japeth loving him like that or doing something to make him believe he could ever do that because loving someone also means hoping the feeling is mutual(unless you are that one sexuality where apparently to love people but you don't want them to love you back-??? Don't ask, I saw it once and that was enough for me to decide that the expertise of sexuality beyond bodily and mental psychology is no place for me to study). Aric was disgusted that Japeth who knew him best could ever think Aric could have such awful thoughts. Sure Aric hates women and he may have influenced Japeth in that aspect too because it's not like anybody else told him that women are pathetic creatures outside of Aric, which might result in a healthy young growing boy's hormones turning their attention to the same gender.(Reminder that places such as the military or conservative schools with only one of the gender present raises homosexuality because, in the age of teenhood where hormones flare up, they won't stop just because the opposite gender isn't present. Aric had contact with the opposite gender and saw examples of heterosexual couples, for example, the family who took him in, compared to Japeth who didn't exactly see Rafal around Evelyn I doubt that in the Arbed House, their biggest concern was making the boys good Christian boys and rather just oppress the evil as much as possible so that they can pass by as good. I mean Tedros is supposedly good and he deadpan chose the 'a villain will burn the world for you' route for Agatha so-).

I believe Aric missed Japeth because Japeth completed Aric. These two were the yin-yang of evil. The spiteful, fiery, rebellious part, and the calmer, colder, tamer part. Evil nonetheless but still, there is a very clear contrast between why these two are evil. It's a spectrum at this point.

Aric missed Japeth because Japeth was secure, Japeth was Aric's safe space. Japeth was the only other soul in this world Aric could share his dark thoughts and desires with, without being judged. Humans are still social animals even if some prefer solidarity, even our beloved introverts feel the need for a pet or some sort of emotional connection. Aric needed that connection. His status of power made it to be out of reach from others. His power build on terror and fear. He wouldn't trust those who loath him most to share his most intimate thoughts with.

Aric effectively isolated himself with his title, just as Rafal had. Aric needed someone wicked enough to understand him yet loyal enough to not choose their selfish reasons over his. Rafal had Sophie for that, however, he underestimated Sophie's external factors, the need for validation from a familiar person(Agatha/Tedros). For Aric though, this would have worked perfectly for Japeth. Japeth had no external factors to care for, not Rhian, not Evelyn, or anybody else. Japeth and Aric were only with each other. No other boys or girls between them. No other friendships or relationships. The only one who could have those was Aric and he effectively couldn't have them. Aric and Japeth wouldn't have been as deadly of a duo as people think. Yes if we take them from a standpoint of view in power and personality sure, but that's where they come and neutralise each other. While I believe that Aric most certainly expressed his feelings of wanting to kill Lady Lesso without hesitation and wanting to hurt Rhian for getting into his friendship with Japeth, he had no other specific targets. Sure Aric killed a dog, terrified a whole family and had an attempt on their lives, but you don't expect a rescue animal, abused, abandoned or traumatised to trust anyone right away. That unfortunate family wasn't the one Aric needed to cool down and recover from the essential meltdown he had for being abandoned and struggling severely in a highly dangerous forest with not just animals to worry about but magical/fantastic creatures who were ten times more deadly and could appear there as well. The Albert House was Aric's anchoring point back to reality and sanity but he had no one to coordinate his evil thoughts constructively like Lady Lesso does with her students because the Albert House works to OPPRESS these tendencies and that didn't sit with Aric's rebellious behaviour. If Aric wouldn't influence Japeth I believe his evilness could have been oppressed to an acceptable extent. Instead, we got the mastermind and his loyal henchmen. While Aric most certainly viewed Japeth as an equal and a person he desired to be around because he could feel human and natural around with, he didn't need him the way Japeth did because Aric experienced genuine unconditional love before Japeth, making him able to depict certain patterns and behaviours unconsciously.

Were Aric and Japeth friends? Yes. If these two weren't bothered would have half of the series happened? No. Were Aric and Japeth lovers? Not really. Did Aric love Japeth? Sure. Did Aric love Japeth? No. Did Japeth love Aric? Yes. Did Japeth love Aric? Yes. Did Aric see Japeth the way Japeth saw him? Not. Did Aric see him as an equal and or counterpart? Yes.

These two were most certainly each other's safe space, however, they viewed one another entirely differently.

Take this as you will.

[imliterallyf7ckin9crazy]

“𝕴’𝖑𝖑 𝕸𝖆𝖐𝖊 𝖄𝖔𝖚 𝕳𝖆𝖕𝖕𝖞 𝕭𝖆𝖇𝖞, 𝕵𝖚𝖘𝖙 𝖂𝖆𝖎𝖙 𝖆𝖓𝖉 𝕾𝖊𝖊”

Nam gyu (player 124) x fem!reader x thanos (player 230).

Squid game season 2

Warnings: typical cannon violence, descriptions of blood and death, semi toxic lol, this duo doing their things, romantic tension but nothing is verbalized, drug mention ofc

A/N: so I’m brain rotted by these two but I see no poly stuff on here let alone in squid game😭 so here. If you’re uncomfortable with drugs don’t read, sorry :/ I’ll right something more gender neutral soon but I had a vision.

TLDR: post game two. Reader is already decent enough friends with nam gyu and thanos. They want to play another game but reader isn’t so sure and they both try to convince her to play. Sfw sorry gang. Kinda sad but whatever.

—————

You had never felt more overwhelmed in your whole danm life.

You had literal seconds left on the clock as you and your randomly selected teammates gripped tightly to each other and struggle to the finish line.

You couldn’t even hear the cheers of the crowd over your own screams of desperation and terror as you all walked as one. Right at the last minute you closed your eyes, running blindly to death. Ready to face the bullets. But then you felt the snap of the finish line across you and your teams united body. And you opened your eyes. The guard watching formed a big ‘O’ with their arms over their head

The crowd burst into cheers and congratulations. You made it with just 2 seconds on the clock. A unspeakable weight was ripped from your shoulders as you processed your teams victory. You only had time to form a small smile and to turn to congratulate your team before that two was ripped from you. Right before your eyes, the other team that started at the same time as yours was mowed down by an unstoppable line of bullets.

The crowd stopped cheering and watched helplessly as another batch of human beings were slaughtered for failing a stupid kids game. The smiles were wiped clean off your team as you were escorted back to the main holding room. Bottoms of your white shoes stained with the blood of countless people before your team.

You would have preferred to lay in your thin provided bed and force yourself to self. To delude yourself into thinking when you’ll wake up you’ll be home because this was all fake. To wake up at home and not splattered in old dry blood.

But of course, nothing can go as you want these days.

Instead you are greeted by fluorescent lighting and two absolute wackos barreling towards you. Players 124 and 230, seemingly unfazed if not satisfied. You nearly forgot about them between the fighting for your life against time situation.

Oddly enough their excessively jovial attitudes rightfully threw off pretty much everyone else in the games, it brings a sick sense of comfort. They make it seem like they were just kids in a summer camp competing for who gets top bunk. It makes you forget where the hell you were. Though deep down you knew there had to be something very wrong for them to take such joy in watching (and in 230s case causing) the death of their peers.

Which is why when 230, THE thanos, approached you after the first game you with 124 hanging right off his heels, you didn’t really resist. You figured ironically you’d be safest as friends of the danger than against it. And you knew they were dangerous. You saw 230 push people in red light, green light. You saw them popping pills while waiting in line for the marathon. But they were friendly to you and weirdly made you feel safe

“AYYYY! Señorita! You made it!!” 230 exclaimed with excitement, reaching you with his arms out. The quickly had you by the shoulders and shook you slightly “we were so worried about you!” He says. You raised an eyebrow as if to say ‘ok, sure’.

124 rounds from behind 230 to behind you so he can put his arm around your neck and hang there “no seriously we were” he looks at you with a smile “honest”

You sigh lightheartedly “okay okay whatever. Lemme sit down guys I’m tired” you say, pushing them off. Only nam gyu, player 124s actual name, didn’t fully let go. He kept his fingers playing with parts of your jacket as the duo led you to thanos’ bed, where they usually chill out. You sit in the middle of the bed and then they sit, one on either side of you.

“This game was worse than the first…” you start to say but then drift off. You met these two because you agreed that everyone should try another game, and backed them up. Obviously, they liked that. Only now you weren’t so sure anymore. You didn’t know if you can keep watching strangers be torn to shreds by the gunfire of dinky little fucks in pink uniforms. “We barely made it…”

Nam gyu places his hand again on your shoulder and gently rubs it. “Just means you’re fit enough to keep going.”He says with a sickeningly calm and comforting voice. Only slightly stuttery. Clearly still rolling off whatever thanos gave him. Your head turns to look at him “keep going? But I thought-“

“I know what you’re going to say” thanos cuts you off grabbing your hand tightly “we have to play again”

You assume you must have made quite the face because he just sighed and kept talking “look, I know. But we all know the money we will get now will do nothing to help us. We have to play again, you see beautiful?” Thanos said expectingly. You took a moment to think, really think if it was worth it. But it was like trying to think with little devils on your shoulders

“I know you need the money just as much as us. Are you gonna forfeit all of that money just to leave?” Nam gyu coaxes, grabbing your other hand and fidgeting with it. It was very hard to focus like this. But the way they were saying it didn’t sound like there was much room for debate.

“The next games will be worse than these. What good does the money do us if we die” you say, trying to pull your hands back to yourself. Only they both refused to release you, gripping your hand in theirs.

“We won’t die, sweetheart” thanos says nonchalantly, will all the certainty in the world. No doubt from whatever he’s on.

“Maybe you won’t but I totally could. I’m not as good at things like this as you two” you argue back. Thanos gives you almost a look of compassion, something you didn’t think he could muster.

Nam gyu lets your hand go and wrapped his arms around you, leaning his head on your shoulder. “We won’t let that happen then, yeah? We can make sure you live” 124 says smoothly

“You just have to vote ‘O’, yeah?” He says. Again. It didn’t sound like a request. You sigh again and give in, seeking any comfort you can get in a situation like this. You lean back a bit into nam gyus clingy grasp and give thanos a tired smile “alright. Just one more game?”

“Just oneee more” thanos says, forming a little heart with his hands and giving you a little wink. “Promise”

You just laugh a bit with them, choosing to put your trust into two broke druggies who took an odd liking to you.

—————

This is lowkey so ass but these idiots are my world rn. I’ll probably rewrite this later when I get a better handle on how I want to write these guys. I love my evil wives.

[profundcherrylady]

SINGLE DAD!SAE ITOSHI

A/N: CHRISTMAS SPECIAL! Yeah I know it's past New Years and technically mid January, I just took a looong time writing this, hope y'all like it tho.

Warnings: None I think. Just a little swearing.

Contents: Rin being a bad babysitter lol. VERY unrealistic btw there is no way none of this could be like an actual situation that could happen in real life. Very, very bad parenting because WHY would Sae let any of this happen tf.

Description: On a displeasing turn of events, Sae has to spend Christmas eve at work, in Spain. But that's not going to stop his daughter from making her Christmas wishes come true.

"...What do you mean, she's gone?" Sae's voice was starting to sound anxious, even on the other side of the phone. Missing? His daughter was missing on Christmas eve? How could this happen? If he was there, he would for sure give Rin something more than just a piece of his mind for losing his daughter.

"Exactly what you're hearing. She's not here." he explained, still looking around under tables and inside cabinets in case she was secretly playing hide and seek again. "I checked her bedroom, the bathroom, your room, the kitchen... it's like she disappeared on thin air."

"That's impossible. Why did you leave her alone in the apartment in the first place?"

"Because she is refusing to move from her room. Well, she was. Now I have no clue of where the hell she is! You know this is your fault, right?"

"Excuse me? Tell me how I'm at fault for you losing my daughter."

"She wouldn't stop asking about you; she was heartbroken when you told her you'd spend Christmas at Spain without her, saying she wanted to be with you and asking when you'd come back. She was so depressed she didn't even want to eat. I even bought her a bunch of presents but she said it'll not be the same without you here, and you know damn well that brat's spoiled. She wouldn't reject any gifts if she wasn't depressed, depressed."

"First of all, do not call her a spoiled brat." he responded. "Second, fine. Leave it at that and just focus on finding her, where could she have gone to? Somewhere that reminds her of me maybe? She must've left something behind, keep looking!"

"I'm looking, chill." he entered the little girl's bedroom once again. Just as he saw before, it was empty and quiet, no sight of her favorite bunny plushie either which meant she must have gone somewhere. She always took that thing everywhere. He peeked under the bed but there was nothing, then finally stood back up.

A paper.

Rin's eyes widened at the sight of a paper on the bed, and he quickly rushed to read it.

"Rin?" he hushed his brother on the other of the phone. The handwriting was messy and childish so it was definitely hers, and as he read line through line his eyes widened even more.

"Fuck."

"What? What is it? Did you find something?"

"So... you're not gonna like what you're going to hear. She left a note... it says she was heading to you."

"Me?" he repeated, absolutely on disbelief. "I'm in Spain."

"Yeah, she seems to know that." the younger Itoshi continued to read the note, this time out loud. "...'Dear uncle Rin, I miss papa, I don't wanba wait anymore...'? Guess she meant 'wanna'. Uh... 'Chridthsma I dunno how to spell it but you know what I mean. Too lonely! I wanna see papa, so I'll go suprise him. I wanna spend tomoreow with him. Thanks uncle Rin! Plz don't throw out my presents that you bought me. Bye-bye'. And that's it."

"WHAT? She can't come all the way to Spain just to see me."

"You bet she can't; she's under eighteen. Relax, she can't travel alone just like that; she won't go far. I'll just go to the airport."

"Okay... that's true, but she wouldn't give up that easily; I'm pretty sure she knows she can't go on a plane alone, so..." then the realization hit him. "The train."

"What?"

"The TRAIN. She'll take the train from Japan to Europe, then from Barcelona to where I'm at on Madrid."

"Sae be fucking for real. Do you seriously think a six-year-old planned all of that?"

"Believe me, she's capable. She's seen those trains before, and she would for sure be too scared to go to the airport."

"And where do you think she'd get the money to travel?"

"Her allowance."

"You give a six-year-old an allowance?"

"STOP asking questions and go to the train station for her!"

"Okay, relax, I'm heading out."

But unfortunately for Rin, little Mao was already on the train station ready to head out to a whole another continent just to see her father. She had packed well (she broght her stuffed bunny) and ate breakfast before heading out (cookies from the kitchen counter); she was even well dressed for the occasion (she put on her jacket).

She was at the train station now, waving hello to the person selling the train tickets.

"Can I go to Spain, please?" she asked excitedly.

"Well, hello. You're taking a trip with your parents? Where are they?"

"My papa is at Spain." the man let out an 'oh' after hearing that.

"On Christmas eve, whithout his family? Must be something important. I'm sorry, though, I can't sell you a ticket to another country without any parental supervision."

"But... I already got all the way here."

"Sorry, kid, it's against the rules. I mean, if you had another parent or someone that can go with you I'd gladly let you go to Spain and see your dad."

"My uncle already said no... that's why I walked here all by myself... in the snow..."

"Well, if he said no it must be for a reason. What about your mom?"

"She isn't alive anymore. My dad and my uncle are pretty much all I have."

"Oh..." now he was starting to feel bad about this poor kids and her sad puppy eyes.

"I just wanted to see my papa on Christmas eve... he said he'd send me presents but I just wanted a hug from him. That was my only Christmas wish... but I guess it won't come true... hopefully he won't miss new year's too... or my birthday... I don't wanna keep seeing him through a screen anymore..."

"Okay, okay, okay, fine." he gave up; this teary-eyed child was going to kill him from sadness. He couldn't just send her home all sad like that. "Fine... I'll make some calls, I'll get you a train ticket to Barcelona. But you have to follow my instructions, okay? Going to another country is a big deal."

"Really? Thank you, mister! Now my Christmas wish is gonna come true!" the man took the phone aside from him and started making calls to arrange everything.

"Just let me see your passport and we'll see what we can do."

"You missed her? Really?" Sae was exasperated at this point. He was confident that they wouldn't let a kid travel to another continent, but apparently they were more incompetent than he thought.

"Listen, I got here as fast as I could. It's Christmas eve and there's snow all over; traffic was horrible." Rin explained, looking over his shoulder where the person in charge was showing him the security footage where they let Mao buy a ticket and get on the train. "I asked and it seems like her train just left. She bought a ticket to Barcelona and she's now on her way to you, but don't worry too much, they told me they got someone from the staff to keep an eye on her."

"That's not as bad as it could be, but what now? I have a match today, she knows that. I told her I wasn't missing Christmas at home just because. I'm busy preparing but if she's already on her way that I might have to cancel."

"Don't get too ahead of yourself just now, her train just left. It's like 19 hours from now, and it has two connections in Portugal and France. It'll take her a while to actually get to you."

"Still, the game is tomorrow at 2:00pm. I don't know if I can concentrate in training if my child is somewhere in Europe. Just thinking about it is getting me on my nerves... I know I can't do anything until she's here but I still feel the urge to go looking for her."

"Listen, it's going to be fine. Nothing will happen to her on the train and once she gets to Spain she only has to buy another ticket from Barcelona to Madrid and then you can do something about it, but do not call off the game because of this. People are counting on you to show up, you know? Seriously, just focus on getting ready and everything will get sorted out. Even if you don't go and look for her, I think she made it clear that she's going to find her way to you."

"I suppose there's some truth in what you say, but it still doesn't feel like something a responsible parent would do. I'm just worried."

"And you don't think I am? She's still my niece; if anything bad happens to her it'll all be my fault."

"It sure will be, you better take the damn responsibility if something happens to my daughter."

"Why do I bother telling you anything? Whatever, I'll call you later."

"France and Portugal were pretty, right?" the assistant from the train watched Mao as she nodded her head with a smile. "You took a big nap earlier; must feel a lot better, hm?"

"Yeah, but I'd really like to get to Spain now..."

"Don't worry, sweetie. Look, we're already here." she almost jumped off her seat when she heard that, holding her plush bunny tightly. The woman from the train helped her gather her stuff and get off, then sweetly waved her goodbye from the inside of the train. "Take care, okay? You're almost there!"

"Bye, miss! Thank you!" Mao waved as well as the train's gates closed off again, then turned around to head to the front desk and buy a ticket to Madrid.

Looking around, she almost bumped with a couple of people who spoke in a language she didn't quite understand and seemed pretty confused to see a foreigner child alone at the train station. She ignored it, as she was busy being amazed at the difference between this place and her hometown, but she kept going until she finally got the front desk where the person in charge looked down at her.

"¿Qué?"

"Hi! Um... I wanna go to Madrid." she pointed to the screen behind the man, so even though he didn't understand the kid he knew what she was trying to say, and he answered accordingly.

"Madrid? ¿Pero qué quiere hacer una niña en Madrid?" she stared, unable to understand a word, and the man finally sighed. "Mo es mi cría ni mi problema. Toma tu boleto a Madrid."

"Thank you!" she took the ticket handed to her and payed the number on the screen and walked towards her next train.

This was it, she was almost there. So close to seeing her father it actually felt unreal! Even when she didn't even spoke spanish she was there! Just a few hours and she would be able to get that hug from him.

Of course, as the hours passed, little Mao ended up spending Christmas eve on the train, but the wait was worth it. When the sun finally went up and Christmas morning came around, Mao Itoshi arrived to Madrid. The city outside the train station was bustling with energy, with big christmas decorations on the local stors and a crowd of people walking around with their children. And so... what now?

Wait.

...What now?

Where WAS Sae? She didn't know. She knew he was in Madrid and that he had a game later, yet that was all. She didn't know where her dad was staying or where could he be now, aside from the stadium where the football game was taking place later, but she didn't know where that was either. The city was huge and full of people; what was she supposed to do now?

"Um... sorry?" she tried asking around for directions, but of course, the locals didn't speak the same language as her. The brushed her off as soon as they realized they weren't getting whatever she was trying to say.

So she continued walking, trying to find anything that might get her in the right direction. At this point, she was tired again. She was only a child after all; she couldn't walk that much without getting exhausted fast, but she kept pushing through. She was on a mission, and the goal was so close; she couldn't possibly give up now. Even if she was tired and cold and hungry... she didn't have that much time before her father's game started, and then she would have to wait even more for that hug!

After a while she stumbled across a café. She didn't have money on her, but she figured she was tired and maybe they could let her just sit for a little bit and rest so that she could get to Sae faster. She held onto her plush bunny a little tighter as she reached for the doorknob and got inside, just to be greeted by a young (yet older from her perspective) woman.

"Bienvenida!" she looked down at the child, and after a couple of seconds she became surprised that she was alone. Peeking outside the door, there was no sight of any parents or older siblings or any responsible adult. She also took note of the fact that her features didn't seem spanish, although they were slightly familiar from somewhere... "¿Hablas español?"

"Um..." the answer to that question was no. She did not speak Spanish, but she didn't know that's what she was asking.

"Ay, probrecita... no te preocupes, ven." she signaled Mao to follow, which she did, and she was sat on a nearby table. "¿Tienes hambre? Ah, es cierto, que no hablas español. Te voy a traer algo de comer, ¿sí?"

After saying a couple more things she didn't understand, the lady finally walked away, so Mao let herself relax for a moment on the tranquility of the almost empty café. The only sounds around were the soothing wirring of the coffee machine on the back, the television set on some corner and the few people that were in there eating. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, resting her head against the table, when the lady came back with a little baked pastry on a plate. She gestured Mao to not worry and just eat it, but before she could actually say anything else she was startled by the sound of another customer cursing out at the TV.

"¿QUÉ?" he exclaimed again, and so she paid a little more attention to the news on there.

"Y ahora, bueno, la noticia que ha tenido a toda España como loca. A las 2:00pm de hoy estaba programado el partido de fútbol que iba a dar lugar en el estadio de Madrid y en el cual iba a participar el llamado prodigio japonés Sae Itoshi. Ha dado muchísimo de que hablar como jugador; se le quiere un montón en su país de origen, y hoy iba a participar en este partido pero de última hora acaba de anunciar que no puede jugar. Es una locura, escúchenme que tampoco me lo puedo creer. El partido ha sido puesto en espera porque Sae Itoshi se está negando a jugar debido a que su hija está desaparecida. Dio algunos minutos de su tiempo para hablar con la prensa hace poco menos de treinta minutos y declaró que aparentemente de vuelta en Japón dejó a su hija al cuidado de su hermano, es decir el tío de la niña, y que... que ha despertado y la niña no estaba! Y en víspera de navidad, además, es que es increíble. Y para hacerlo peor todavía, la niña dejó una nota en su casa diciendo que fue a visitar a su padre, por lo cual Sae Itoshi declaró que su hija está en algún lugar de Madrid y que no puede jugar hasta que no la encuentre. No me creo que esto sea una noticia real gente, pero aquí estamos. Eh... pues ya saben, estén atentos. Sae Itoshi dejó la descripción de su hija para que quien sea que la vea lo pueda reportar o la lleve directamente al estadio. Es una niña de seis años, tiene el cabello oscuro y los ojos iguales a los de su padre; también dice que lleva con ella un... ¿conejo de felpa?"

"Dios mío!" after hearing the news, the lady was certain. This kid in the café was Sae Itoshi's daughter; her description matched and then it made sense that her features seemed familiar. So she was missing and her father was holding the whole football match until he found her... she had to do something!

She waited patiently until Mao finished her little snack and then approached her again, pointing at the TV where they were showing the footage of Sae declaring the facts of her little runaway. The kid gasped, almost trying to reach out to him.

"Papa!" that she could understand. It was very similar to the spanish word "papá" which meant dad so there was no doubt.

"Te voy a llevar con tu papá, ¿bien? Vamos." she offered her hand, which Mao took as the lady shouted that she was going out for a little bit and got out with her.

"C'mon, Sae, be reasonable. You can't just back out of the game like this! Do you know how many people are counting on you?"

"Yeah, the thing is, I don't give a fuck my daughter is MISSING. I was patient enough; I'm not doing anything until she's safe and sound."

"But... Sae! This game is very important for all of us! You're going to make us lose!"

"So you're telling me... a stupid football match is more important than my daughter's life." now THAT made him rethink his words, although not for long, because there was no way he was going to stay quiet with how much was at stake. But the next thing he said was the last straw for Sae.

"N-No... I didn't mean... fuck, Sae, she's been missing two days! Maybe it's time you consider the other possibilities and move on-"

"What did you just say?" his harsh tone and the darkened expression on his face made the whole room go quiet. "I don't care if you lose the game over this, you hear me? But that's my little girl, and if anything happens to her because of this I could never forgive myself, and the fact that you are even suggesting that she could be dead and that I just 'move on' is making me sick. You want me to play today? You better keep that stupid mouth of yours fucking closed or I'll make sure you do. I don't say things twice so you better listen up. I'm getting out of here to find her, understood?"

"Y-Yeah... I'm sorr-"

"Papa!" Sae's expression instantly switched as soon as he heard the familiar voice call for him, and as he turned around, there she was. Safe and unharmed, accompanied by a few security guards from the stadium. His eyes relaxed inmediately when he saw her ran up to him, then he crouched down and opened up his arms as he saw the little girl going for a hug, and once she was on his arms again, he let out a sigh of relief and held her just a little bit tighter. "I missed you, papa!"

Sae stood back up with her still on his arms, and frowned slightly as he looked down at her again.

"You are in very big trouble, young lady. You traveled all across Europe from Japan, through Portugal and France, just to be here. Do you have any idea how dangerous and irresponsible that was? Do you know what could've happened to you? You could've gotten lost, or worse. I am very disappointed; I was worried sick. You don't even speak spanish and you still managed to get all the way to the stadium." he saw her little smile fade away with his words, and he sighed once more as his eyes softened once again. "You must've really wanted to see me today, huh?"

"I did! Papa, I wanted to be with you on Christmas."

"We talked about this, Mao, I sent you lots of gifts back to Japan and we could always videocall today after the game; you didn't need to do all of this."

"But I did need it!"

"How so?"

"Because none of the gifts were what I wanted..."

"What? That's not possible. I sent you everything you said you wanted; I bought you that dollhouse you said was pretty and the dress you said you wanted for Christmas, there were more plush toys and accessories you told me you liked and things from your favorite cartoons. I don't know how I could've missed anything."

"That's okay papa, it's because those are the gifts from you! I did want those but they weren't my Christmas wish."

"Really? None of them?"

"Nope! They were things I wanted but they weren't my Christmas wish. But don't worry, papa, there's no way you could've known. I wrote it on my letter to Santa!"

Oh.

Didn't he tell Rin to check that as well? Damn it, he missed his daughter's Christmas wish and he didn't realize. Of course it didn't come true if he didn't know what it was to buy it...

"Well, can I know what it is? Maybe there's still time to get you whatever it is."

"It's okay, I already have it! It was a hug from you." and then his heart melted down. How could he still be mad after that?

"You little rascal. Why did you tell Santa and not me?"

"I figured he'd talk to you and maybe you would change your mind and go home. But then I found out what was his plan really was! I woke up yesterday and there was a letter under the tree! And it had money and the train schedule so I could get here today! And then a lot of miracles happened, like the person who sold me the ticket and the nice lady from the train and the café and me getting this far without knowing any spanish!"

"You found a letter with money under the tree? I didn't do that..." he whispered, and he certainly knew Rin didn't do it either.

"Of course you didn't; it was Santa!" Sae rolled his eyes and gave her one last hug.

"It still doesn't mean you're free from punishment. You're grounded for a month."

"Why?!"

"You traveled to another continent without permission and you're asking why you're grounded? Hand over that plush bunny, miss."

"Noooo, not that! I'm not gonna do it again!"

"You bet you won't."

"Don't take it, please! He's my best friend."

"I know." he huffed. "Fine. Now, I'm gonna need you to wait for me; I have a game to win."

[conflagrazione]

Near (from death note) is a character that makes me so insane even after like six years since the first time I read the manga because. Imagine.

You're an orphan that grew up idolizing a person you never even spoke to and you liked him even more when he said that "he's a cheater that doesn't like to lose" and you found out that is not the embodiment of justice but just a man like you that liked to solve puzzles. You two even look so alike! And then he dies. And your rival/foster brother/ guy with whom you have this weird religious coded tension says that you're better suited for the job anyway, you've always been smarter than him anyway, and leaves you alone at THIRTEEN to solve the world's most dangerous case. And you don't even hate said guy, you kind of respect him and want to work with him but he makes his life purpose to beat you at this game. And you're the younger in this case but you're the less childish (emotionally speaking) and you are probably the character that expresses more vocally his dislike of Kira, that has not even a little bit of admiration for his intellect or motivation, and that's the reason why you're the one destroying his pathetic ass in the wharehouse. And then you spend years of your life alone because your "rival" put aside his fatal flaw and decided to die (knowing he will die) to save you and your team, because winning didn't make sense if he couldn't wait for you on the finish line. But they are the martyrs, and you are the one that put together their merits. So you let your hair grows like L's and you try to solve every case like he would, fulfilling the role of a dead person. Keeping L's and Mello's dolls with you even years after everything ended.

I always get annoyed when people accuse Near of being less smart than L ,of "not caring" about the Minoru case, of being a "bad copy" because he and L are identical. Babe. That's the point. He's not L, and he's not superior to him unless him and mello cooperate. Near himself aknowledges that the case was solved because of him and mello. Of course he doesn't do a big move (like shutting down sakura tv) to stop Minoru. That's something L (or even more, Mello) would do. Of course adult Near and L look so similar, he's trying to be him!!

(Honestly I wonder if him saying he wasn't very L- like in the C- Kira oneshot was the moment in which he chose to follow his own path, since in Minoru oneshot he doesn't seem as worried about acting like L as in the C-Kira oneshot or in the original series)

He is a bad copy. He's also just a half of the whole. He's not a copycat, he is haunted.

[alexanderwales]

It's often the case that I'm reading or watching something and I think "yes, this idea is great, I want to take this and feast on it and make my own version that is better suits my tastes". This is especially the case when I think someone has dropped the ball, when I have a vision that doesn't align with whatever the creator was doing.

I'm a big believer in "natural stories", ways in which any premise suggests a narrative. Usually this is because of some kind of tension inherent in the premise: if you have a story that's about clones, it's gonna be about divergence, or paths not taken, or individuality, or power dynamics, or individual rights.

It's probably not about a crisis of faith, or the immigrant experience, or climate change. You can, obviously you can, and there are probably good ways of doing any of those. But I would argue there are also "natural" ways to do any of those, specific paths of least resistance to tie the clone thing whatever your subject is.

And sometimes I'll be reading a story with some kind of premise, and get a ways into it, only to start asking myself "why did they marry this premise with this theme?"

Sometimes this helps me to understand a work better, and I think it's genuinely a great first step for media analysis: why these two things together? How do they comment on each other? Does this rug tie the room together?

Other times, the answer eludes me, and I have to weigh the possibility that the creator just didn't have a coherent vision for fitting everything together.

That, or I'm that one ogre from that meme who is bad at media analysis.

[notnotstarving]

Why Weslow (Wes and Willow) Works so Well

Romantically and or Platonically

So I was asked about my vision by @distortedsoup (like 3 months ago so sorry) and I am here to finally deliver. This is based off the little canon we know of Wes and Willow as well as my own personal preferences in romantic tropes, but however my opinion is always right.

(Also I made this post about how the other survivors view Wes. This is not necessary to read but it does help give context to some of the points I make and also gives fair comparisons to their other relationships in the constant, which can help give context to why Weslow works.)

This was fun to do and ​I may wanna do more in depth breakdowns of the characters interpersonal relationships, not necassarily only romantic ones.

Willow's Compendium states:

From a young age, Willow seemed to possess a knack for attracting bad luck.

Wes' Compendium states:

Despite a life plagued by terrible luck, Wes has never been one to utter so much as a word of complaint.

Willow attracts bad luck, Wes IS bad luck? HELLO??! BOOM BAM! They're like magnets, case closed. In all seriousness, this means they both had a tough life before the constant, so they'd understand each other in terms of hardships.

Before I deep dive, something to establish is that Wes and Willow are both outcasts and weirdos, I know this is true for most of the dst cast, but this is still true even when they are among their fellow weirdos. Wes is described as odd, strange, and weird by a good deal of his fellow survivors. Their opinions on Wes, although mostly pleasant, is rather superficial. The majority of them don't see him as anything more than "the mime". On top of people only seeing him as his job, about half of the other survivors don't even like his mime act, they maybe get a smile out of it once in a while, but mostly just tolerate it. As for Willow, most seem to have a fondness for her; but even so, pretty much everyone finds her reckless, strange, and not very reliable.

More on Wes' side:

Now Wes loves his job, it's canon that his passion is bringing joy to others. His compendium states that if he was given the choice, he would still let himself be taken into the constant because he thinks the survivors there are miserable. So yeah, he loves his job. But even with the level of passion that he has for being a mime, I'm sure he would like for someone to want to get to know him beyond that, nobody likes being seen as one dimensional after all. It is also harder for Wes to accomplish opening himself up to the others because he does not talk. Most of the survivors do not give him flack for being silent, only a small minority seem to be openly annoyed by this, but it still acts as a deterrent for them to try to get to know him, or spend time with Wes. His muteness is a big roadblock to him being able to bond with the survivors on a deeper level, and it is possibly one of the big reasons they don't seem to be interested in getting to know him more either because it would take more effort to communicate with him. However,

Willow is an exception.

She is one of the only survivors with quotes that show she talks to him, jokes around with him. Here are some examples:

Cannon (Nothing to upload)- "Darn it, I'm out... hey Wes, you always wanted to try being a human cannonball right?"

Empty Elixir- "Hey Wes! Dare you to drink the last bit!"

She is the only survivor with quotes that show her trying to get Wes' attention rather than the other way around, which shows that she enjoys being around him. These bids for attention are not uncommon for Willow, she is a rather sociable gal, but to Wes this is probably a rare instance. We have already established he is seen as weird and often overlooked, so if he wants to have an interaction it is likely him that makes the first move to do so. But here is this strange arsonist that goes out of her way to talk with him, not by act of pity either, because she treats him the same as everyone else. Willow is a talker, Wes can't be, but this does not stop her from connecting with him. I can definitely see Willow running into Wes and just talking his ear off on whatever is on her mind, him responding in gestures, and her genuinely appreciating and trying to understand his responses. For Wes, this would make him feel seen and appreciated as an individual, a friend, rather than as a performer.

Willow's side:

We all know Willow had a horrible childhood, and life in general, so much so that she actually prefers her clean slate in the constant over her previous life. You would think because of her scorned past, she would be more closed off and stand offish, but on the contrary she is rather open and somewhat amiable albeit brash. In spite of her lonely and rough childhood, she's choosing not to give up on trying to make meaningful connections because she craves the affection she never got growing up, judging by her quote for Walter's hat:

Pinetree Pioneer Hat- "Okay fine, so I wasn't "in" girl scouts so much as "crashed" girl scouts."

Sure it's a funny quote, but when you really think about it, the quote is actually kinda sad. Willow did not have any parent that could enlist her into the scouts, so what reason would she have for being in the scouts? Maybe her motivations for "crashing" scouts is because it's a large group of girls in her age group spending time together and bonding over mutual merits along with adults whom are meant to look after and teach them.

Now that I've established that she is lonely and wants friends, let's move onto how Willow wants to be perceived. I know it seems like she doesn't care what anyone thinks about her due to her carefree nature and bold attitude, but consider what she says when another Willow starts attacking:

Attacker- "You're makin' us look nuts, %s!"

I think Willow actually does care about how the other's see her because if she's too weird, too rude, too violent, too needy, or too anything, then the other's won't wanna be friends with her (or at least start distancing themselves which she doesn't want). Since Willow likely grew up not having very stable relationships, I don't think she would be the best at social cues, or conventionally expressing her own emotions, but I don't think this means she's completely blind to how others perceive her. Personally, I believe she is aware that people see her as rough around the edges, but that she also believes if she is persistent (and waters herself down a tiny bit) with them then she could endear herself to them ("crashing" into their lives much like how she did with the girl scout troop). Now enter Wes:

Some random oddball mime.

But the thing about Wes is that you don't have to pretend to be anything other than yourself in order to be friends with him. Wes will accept you as you are, no matter the faults or past mistakes, because that's just the kind of guy he is (I mean, Wes forgave MAXWELL, the man who condemned him simply because he inconvenienced his plans.). For someone so insecure about her own qualities, it's good she met a guy who she doesn't have to dim her flame for, but rather someone who will fan her flames! What appeals to Willow about Wes is that she doesn't have to prove herself in order to be given a chance. Finally she can have a friend who she can be herself around without feeling like she's being judged (especially since Wes is equally as weird), or doing something wrong, and this is probably the reason why she seeks to interact with Wes more than the others do.

The implications:

Take a look at this quote:

Beaten Beater- "When I crank it Wes pretends to ride unicycle circles around me."

I know that Willow is likely not the only person that Wes mimes goofy things around, but who else mentions it other than Willow? Wes is prominent enough in Willow's mind that when she looks at some mundane item she is reminded of his pantomiming, maybe finds it charming. (You can't tell me she wouldn't hold on to it and crank it at random times just to see Wes mime the motion, and Wes no matter what he's doing at the moment will pantomime riding a unicycle for their the bit. It's their little inside joke.)

In conclusion, what most is appealing about Weslow is the mutual experience of feeling seen and accepted unconditionally. By being with Willow, Wes can have someone that pushes past his surface and appreciates him as an individual rather than an act/prop. Out of the Weslow relationship, Willow in turn gets someone who she can fan her flames around without judgement or discouragement because said person loves unconditionally. They naturally gravitate towards each other because of this and would want their partner to feel the same which progresses their bond even further. Since Willow gets to be herself around Wes, she seeks to interact with him not just for her own gratification, but because she'd also want to get to genuinely know the guy who values her, what he even sees in her. This proactive attempt at a genuine connection with him would of course make Wes feel cherished, finally someone wants to make him smile in return.

Thank you for listening to my TED talk. Let me know if you've been enlightened (you better have).

[mrincrediblyblind]

MASSIVE S4 ANALYSIS

ANALYSED BY YET ANOTHER GAY TEEN ON THE INTERNET!

okay, this is about the California crew, (except Argyle). This is Byler, but i’m talking about it from the confirmed perspective that Will has a crush on Mike.

Firstly, just to set clear that were all aware the Rink ‘O Mania outing happened on Will’s birthday? If not google the date of it, it’s March 22nd as confirmed as Will’s birthday by Joyce in season two.

also please reblog this because i put my entire twinkussy into this 😭

ANYWAY!!

the things i’m gonna talk about:

1. Will’s birthday

2. The Hug

3. He knows :0

4. Jonathan sees Nancy in Mike

5. Joyce

6. Eleven

7. Will and Eleven

8. Friends Do Lie

9. Micheal Wheeer.

read on, dear friends!!! ⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️

1. WILL’S BIRTHDAY

((okay but he looks so epic in this shot, ily Will❤️‍🩹))

So for starters, the fact that Will probably convinced Joyce and Jonathan that he was going to Rink O’ Mania to celebrate his birthday with Eleven and Mike makes me want to kill myself!!! 😍😍😍

He probably thought he’s seeing Mike and he was gonna get a hug like when they last saw eachother and Mike would have an explanation as to why he could barely contact Will, and he’d probably had written him out a card or something for his birthday.

HE PROBABLY BROUGHT THE PAINTING FOR MIKE SO IF HE GAVE WILL ANYTHING HE COULD BE LIKE “oh, that’s so sweet… i actually did this for you. I’ve been working on it a while and thought i’d give it to you cos i’d see you today”

Mike also flew in on Will’s birthday. Can you imagine how happy he was? Byler shipper or not, they haven’t seen eachother in a year and Eleven gets the news that Mike’s coming to California. She tells Will “oh, he’s flying in on.. March the Twenty Second”.

Will, internally probably thought “that’s my birthday? is mike flying in to see my for my birthday?”, because who wouldn’t think highly of someone your close to in that way?

Regardless, you CANNOT tell me Will’s the “He didn’t have to get me something but the thought would be nice” TYPE OF PERSON

Poor boy probably saw the flowers and either

1. Thought they were for him

2. Knew they were for El, but Mike had something else for him

2. THE HUG

he got him absolutely nothing. not even a proper hug.

LOOK AT THE GRIN ON MY POOR BABY’S FACE WHEN HE SEES MIKE!!

HE LITERALLY HAS THE PAINTING IN HIS HAND, YET GOES IN ARMS WIDE FOR A HUG DESPITE THE FACT HE COULD CRUSH THE PAINTING??

He also grabs Mike’s backpack in an attempt to pull him into a meaningful hug. It’s been a year since they last saw each other.

We know Jonathan’s high off his balls, but he looks at the painting and then the boys “hugging” (if you can even call that a hug). He’s probably confused why Will didn’t get round to giving Mike the painting.

3. HE KNOWS :0

There’s no doubt that Jonathan knows what’s up. Lonnie used to verbally abuse Will for being gay so i’m sure he’s confirmed it to Jonathan at some point.

Also which, i’m sure he sees the fact that he has been in a similar situation with MIKE’S SISTER??

There was another person (Steve) who was with his love interest while him obviously being in love. Does that not parallel like crazy?

Jonathan’s not stupid, he’s just as high as a kite for the entire season, which if anything would probably make him overthink about the scenario.

When people smoke weed the THC in Cannabis (weed) can effect your frontal lobe which is responsible for a lot of creativity and logical thinking and enhances your senses overall. This is probably why Argyle suggested they fill up the pizza dough freezer.

Depending on how much he’s smoked, he could also be incredibly paranoid, as too much will cause a massive dopamine spike and can cause you too feel anxious and overthink.

Just because he’s had a couple hits doesn’t mean he doesn’t know what’s going on. He probably does, maybe definitely. He’s either thinking really deep about it or is super paranoid and thinking worse case scenario.

this moves me onto my next point

4.JONATHAN SEES NANCY IN MIKE

Nancy is unable to express her emotions and we know this, Jonathan knows this.

She struggled to tell Steve she loved him, Jonathan knows this. Jonathan was ALSO there when Will was trying to get Mike to (struggle to) say I love you.

He ALSO sat through Murray exposing Nancy for not being able to admit her love to Steve. On top of this, He’s dating her and experiencing the lack of communication first hand

as well as being stuck in the exact same weird love triangle thing. Eleven and Will are both in love with Mike. Jonathan and Steve were both in love with Nancy. He’s watching his brother go through the same thing.

I’m also certain that Will would’ve talked to Jonathan about Mike not talking to him like, at all. We know that they have a very close sibling bond so I’m sure Jonathan is aware.

5. JOYCE

We know absolutely jack shit about Joyce and what she knows, but she’s overprotective as.

I’m sure she would’ve insisted for Will to come do something with her and Jonathan for his birthday. He either would’ve:

A - insisted on going because El was going

B - Insisted on going because he hadn’t seen Mike for so long

C - Made up a lie that the roller skating was for his birthday

I’m sure it would be C, and some other contributing factors. Will doesn’t have a job and neither does Eleven, so where would the money for the skating tickets come from?

Joyce likely gave Will and Eleven money for them to go skating with Mike for Will’s birthday.

6. ELEVEN

Eleven is never ever at fault for Mike being… Micheal.

If anything, she went through an awful lot as well this season, so let’s unpack.

Before Mr Minion (Mike) arrives at the airport and all, were shown life in California for the Byers. Eleven and Will are in high school and Eleven is getting relentlessly picked on. It’s assumed that it might be her lack of education and social intelligence. Nonetheless, we know she is being bullied and the main perpetrator is Angela.

Angela humiliates Eleven despite her attempts at being nice and trying to befriend her. She doesn’t understand that Angela can be mean to her because she isn’t aware anyone is capable of wronging her.

She knows the people who work for the government and ones employeed at Hawkins lab are bad, hence why she calls them “The Bad Men”. She knows that they are out to get her because she’s escaped and is still on the run.

She thought Hopper was rude, but she learned he was only trying to keep her safe.

She thought Max was rude, but quickly learned that she was mistaken and formed a bond.

Eleven is forgiving. She let Kali/Eight’s punk friends (mainly Axel, with the mohawk) be rude to her.

She was deemed untrustworthy by lucas the whole 1st season and even lashed out at him, yet kept trying to be his friend and eventually earned his trust.

She was yelled at time and time again by Mike, who planned to get rid of her after finding Will, yet still got close to him.

She is unaware that people outside of the Hawkins Laboratory can be bad, as everyone she thought was bad has turned out to be an assumption proven wrong. She thinks that if she keeps persisting in being Angela’s friend then it will work out.

Eleven probably suggested they go to Rink ‘O Mania.

She already knew the popular kids hung out there, she tried to convince Mike that they were her friends in hopes that it would turn out well and they would meet Mike and hang out and have a good time.

She missed hanging out with a group of people who all valued her. She grew up in a group of lab experiments, she hung out with the party. Being alone reminds her of her darkest times, being experimented on and locked away, isolated in a claustrophobic deprivation tank, being on the run and surviving in her own.

Eleven hates being on her own, that’s why she hated being by herself in season 2 in Hopper’s cabin and alone in Mike’s basement. When she found out that there are nice people in the world (by meeting Benny) that weren’t just the other children in the lab, she wanted to surround herself with people who could look after her.

7. WILL AND ELEVEN

Finally, Will knows that El is being picked on. Instead of going home on his birthday after the disappointment of it all, he stays with Eleven.

He’d seen her get made fun of for her diorama of Hopper (who she assumed was dead??) and probably every other petty drama with Angela off screen.

He stayed with Eleven and Mike, third wheeling on his own birthday so that he could look after her.

He could have changed his mind and gone home, yet Eleven lied about having heaps of friends and going to the roller rink all the time, and when he saw them approach the table, he knew it would be a good idea to put her first.

8. FRIENDS DO LIE

“friends don’t lie” is something the Duffers familiarised us with up until the point of season 3 when Max tells El “Yeah, well boyfriends lie. All the time.”

We see Mike has been lying to El, and what does that teach her? Boyfriends lie and girlfriends lie.

She lies to Mike in her letter about having friends

Mike lies to her about…

MOSTLY JOKING IM SORRY MILEVENS IM SUPPOSED TO BE NON BIAS, IM JUST SAYING ELEVEN LIED TO MIKE THIS SEASON AND THEYVE BOTH RUINED THE TRUST IN THEIR RELATIONSHIP

9. MICHEAL WHEELER.

Not too much to say about him(/j). Firstly, I genuinely cannot back him up on the whole Will’s birthday thing, that shit makes me wanna cry. We might need the byler lawyer for this one.

However, it’s obvious Mike is very torn between the two. I’m trying to include as little byler as possible, but we are shown that Mike CANNOT deal with both Will and Eleven at the same time. He doesn’t write Will letters, only Eleven, yet he’s known Will since kindergarten and being his friend was the best thing he ever did.

The fact that he couldn’t reach out to Will does show that he is suppressing something that he doesn’t want Will to find out about. He’d rather upset Will then come to terms with something about himself or about Will.

I’ll leave this up to you as the reader, but take into account the fact Will is canonically gay and Mike is canonically a dick about it since season three. It might be a tough pill to swallow if you don’t think Mike has a crush on Will, but here’s what I’m saying.

Mike knows Will is not attracted to girls.

Season 2 final episode at the Snowball Dance, the girl approaches Will and asks to dance. He stutters and mumbles “i’m not-“, going to turn her down when Mike repeatedly hits him, encouraging him to dance with her.

Season 3x3, Will and Mike fight in the rain, Mike settles with the most considerate accepting words he could’ve.. 😍😍

“it’s not my fault you don’t like girls!!” 🥰

So Mike is aware of Will’s homosexuality. Would this contribute to him not wanting to be affectionate anymore? Because Mike is being homophobic? “It’s not my fault you don’t like girls”? that’s literally homophobic

Please explain to me (non Byler shippers, this is), why he wouldn’t feel comfortable around Will. I don’t mean this in a passive aggressive way, i actually want someone to explain it to me.

Regardless, i’m mad at Mike for being a shit friend on Will’s birthday.

YOOO!! You’ve reached the bottom! look at you! go. Share your thoughts with me please, this took so long so if you could reblog, i’ll give you a kiss on the mouth (/hj)

[separatist-apologist]

The Prophecy

Summary: No one has seen or heard from Elain Archeron in two months…until she turns up one day in the Spring Court with no memory of where she's been or what she's been doing.

Tamlin and Lucien will have to work together to untangle the mystery of Elain's missing memories.

My gift for @olenvasynyt- but other people can read, too?

@acotargiftexchange

Read on AO3 | Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3

-

“You’re in my dream again.”

Elain sighed. “Were you waiting for me?”

He was shirtless, for starters, and she didn’t believe for a moment that hadn’t been done on purpose, though she didn’t quite know how. She could walk through dreams,  but as far as Elain could tell, people couldn’t control what they dreamt about. Case and point—Lucien was half submerged while holding a heavy, iron skillet filled with what appeared to be ham. 

“No, clearly not,” Lucien replied, frowning down at whatever concoction he’d been making. He dropped into the inky water but otherwise didn’t move. 

“Are you having a nightmare?”

“Starting to feel like it,” he mumbled.

“Get out of the water and conjure a shirt—”

“I can’t,” he hissed, promoting her to look into the opaque water. She saw nothing but thighs, but that was enough. 

“You’re naked?!” she screeched, whirling on her heel. She nearly tumbled backward given the rocky shore was slick from the lapping waves and what a nightmare that would have been for her, too. 

“You’re the one in my dream,” he reminded her in that matter-of-fact way of his. “I don’t think you get to be outraged.”

“I’m still figuring it out,” she admitted, turning back around to look only at his face. His ruined, scarred face…that was so impossibly handsome it infuriated her. Drag five nails down her face and everyone would call her spoiled. Do it to Lucien, and he was rakishly handsome. She knew the story, of course—he’d defied Amarantha and she’d pried his eye out. Feyre had told her back in the early days when she’d hoped Elain might fall into Lucien’s arms and be settled with one of the fae.

He shifted in the crystalline water lapping around his waist while Elain tried not to notice the sculpted contours of his chest. So he was attractive? Everyone in Prythian was, effectively making it meaningless. Once, she’d been blinded by the beauty of everyone around her but now it hardly phased her at all. Another chiseled jaw—she rather liked the imperfection of Lucien’s face.

Not that she’d ever tell him, of course. But it made him interesting to look at. 

“What is it like?” Lucien questioned, pulling her back to the moment. 

“A crossroads, I suppose,” she told him, kicking a pebble with her boot. “It used to be impassable but lately I’ve been able to come here.”

“Could you visit anyone?”

“I don’t know,” she admitted, though she, too, was curious about it. Would the walls her sister purported to keep up be enough to withstand Elain if she truly wanted to see her? “I don’t understand my magic.”

There. She said it. Lucien didn’t seem surprised by it, resting his palm flat against the water's surface. His long, auburn hair skimmed beside him, half soaked which gave him a cat-like quality. 

“Seers are rare,” Lucien reminded her. She’d heard that all before. “No one really knows how their magic works or the limitations of it.” “Feyre said courts would go to war for a Seer,” Elain told him. Was that why Tamlin wouldn’t let her go? 

“I doubt it,” Lucien replied sharply, as though mere mention of Feyre irked him. “But they wouldn’t be likely to give you up, either.”

“Like you and Tamlin?”

“I was waiting for you to say that,” Lucien replied with a half smile. “I don’t know if a Seer could tell us anything we don’t already know.”

“If I could, though…?”

“We’re not keeping you—”

“We?” she interrupted, catching the way he kept referring to himself and Tamlin as a unit. “You work for my sister.”

Don’t you?

Lucien’s smile slipped. “Ah. Right. No, I am no longer employed by the Night Court.”

“Why not?”

“It’s time to move on,” Lucien told her, his gaze shifting to look at the fuzzy world beyond her. The scene was only filled out around them, blurred just as soon as she looked away from Lucien. Dreams were strange, half-formed things and she supposed she shouldn’t be surprised he’d only colored in the pieces he needed. “I thought Velaris would be a new start for me.”

“You never lived there,” she accused. “How can it be a new start if you never gave it a chance?”

“Everyone hates me,” Lucien spat, straightening out his shoulders. “Maybe not your sister, but everyone else? They can’t stand the sight of me and make no secret of it. I don’t belong in the human lands, either, though it was…more pleasant than Night. I miss Spring—it was the only place that felt like home.”

“If you stay, we’ll never see each other again,” she reminded him.

Lucien scoffed. “I can’t imagine you’re disappointed by that.”

“They don’t like me either,” she said impulsively. Lucien rolled his eyes, half turning to reveal a back that was lined with more scars. She felt sickened by the sight—why was everyone constantly trying to kill him? Lucien was frustrating, sure, but Elain didn’t think he deserved all this. 

“Elain, Rhysand has offered a reward of a million marks to anyone who knows where you are.”

It was her turn to scoff. “Why? So he can go back to looking at me like I’m Feyre’s annoying child he can’t stand the sight of? They don’t like me…they just tolerate my presence because Feyre feels guilty we were turned.”

“Why fight so hard to go back?”

She shrugged. “Just because I’m unhappy there doesn’t mean I want to leave here with you.”

He exhaled, the sound reminiscent of a laugh. “Fair enough. Where would you go?”

She sighed. “Gray and I had these plans, after we got married. I know Feyre and Nesta think I was going to live behind those walls and…I don’t know…have babies and clean and cook, but we were going to travel. His father was still lord and we…”

It hurt to think about, even with so much distance between them. Lucien looked down at the water.

“I once made similar plans. I…I know it’s cold comfort, but I know how you feel.”

Feyre had told Elain that story, too, though Elain wasn’t sure now was the right time to mention it. It seemed like the sort of thing Lucien might want to tell her someday, and the kind of story he deserved to tell for himself. 

“You were going to travel?”

“She’d never seen anything outside of Autumn,” he murmured, his eyes glazed over. “I wanted to show her…it doesn’t matter anymore. I only meant, I understand your grief. It’s not just losing the person, but the life you imagined, too. A whole future, gone and no one understands that.”

“They don’t,” she whispered, wrapping her arms around her body, though she wasn’t cold. “They just wanted me to move on. To be happy. At least I was immortal, right?”

“‘You’re young, you’ll find someone else,’” Lucien said in a mocking tone, words that Elain had heard, too, though not quite in the same way.

What about Lucien? Have you tried talking to Lucien? Your mate, Lucien? 

It was easy to hate him for it. Elain had never bothered to ask if he wanted her—she’d just assumed he did. Afterall, he kept coming around, kept giving her gifts, would sit in the same room with her silently, trying to speak to her before he’d finally given up entirely. How much of that was because he wanted to, and how much was out of dutiful obligation? 

“I don’t know where I was during those months,” Elain decided to tell him. Lucien looked up at her, his expression carefully guarded. “If I help you figure it out…will you let me leave?”

Lucien nodded his head. “I won’t stand in your way.”

“And you and Tamlin will help me with my magic,” she added, because it seemed important. 

“Deal.”

“You don’t know if he’ll agree to that,” she countered.

“Trust me—he will,” Lucien assured her. “So long as you’re honest with us.”

“Didn’t he forbid Feyre—”

“That was different,” Lucien interrupted, clearly irked. “A different climate, a different…just all of it was different and she knows it. If you want help, I’ll help you.”

There were some things she never planned to tell him—like the wards she could see and how she unchained them the way someone might undo the loops in their knitting. She also needed to be more careful dropping prophecies in his lap—Lucien still hadn’t told her about the last one, though to be fair, they were barely on speaking terms. If he could help her figure out how to navigate this shadowy dream world, Elain thought she could manage the rest on her own.

“You’ll help me with Rhys and Feyre?”

“There’s no one alive that could help you with the pair of them. You’ll have to stand up to them by yourself,” Lucien told her with a mocking smile. 

“I can, you know.”

“I believe it,” he replied easily. “Now do you mind leaving my dream?”

“I’ll be back,” she replied, turning her back to him. 

“I’ll make sure I’m wearing pants, then,” he grumbled, almost too softly for her to hear. Elain didn’t know why she found that funny. But she caught herself giggling softly as she made her way back toward the flaring light and her own dreams.

—

Tamlin was out, courting anyone who’d remained that he felt he could trust. Lucien had stayed up the night before creating a short list, alongside a deed for titles, land, and money—all Tamlin had to do was put a name on the parchment and stamp it with the official seal to be kept in Tamlin’s manor as an official record. He’d be working out of the estate further north, which also lent a certain amount of credibility if Rhys managed to get one of his bats through the wards. 

Lucien had noticed holes in them, always just at the edges—always his wards. He mended them easily enough, but every morning he’d find new holes peeking around the edges—no one should have been able to get through the wards at the border, and when he winnowed down to check, those were still intact.

Perhaps he was simply losing his touch. 

Elain was out in the gardens most morning, awake long before Lucien managed to drag himself out of bed. She went to bed much earlier than him, and seemed to wake with the literal sunrise—or before. Tamlin had mentioned once she’d beaten him to breakfast. 

He found her, as he so often did, pulling weeds while the hen she’d named Henrietta ambled about. The bird didn’t like him much, which amused Elain greatly. If he was honest with himself, he rather liked the smile that lit over her face whenever the bird would start clucking at him, nipping at the hem of his pants with its beak.

“You weren’t in my dream last night,” Lucien accused.

Elain’s head snapped up. “Yeah.”

“Where did you go?”

“Cassian’s,” she mumbled, her cheeks flaming red. “He didn’t realize I was there…it’s for the best.”

Jealousy clawed at him as he asked, “What did you see?”

“He was dreaming about my sister,” Elain muttered, pulling a weed viciously from the ground. “It was…detailed.”

Lucien could help the laugh that wheezed out of him. He’d smelled the sex rolling off the pair of them, he could imagine what Cassian dreamt about and didn’t think he’d want to see it, either. Elain shot him a filthy look, eyes narrowed. “It’s not funny.”

“It’s a little funny,” he argued. “Sorry about your failed escape attempt.”

“I wasn’t…” her cheeks warmed. “I wasn’t trying to escape, just…tell them I’m fine and they don’t need to worry.”

Lucien laughed a second time. “Maybe you should send Rhys a letter.”

Elain, unaware of the history there, seemed to consider it. Lucien wondered how Feyre and Rhys might take a letter where Elain claimed she’d left with Tamlin of her own free will and didn’t want to be contacted. Would they feel justified hunting her down? After all, who knew what Tamlin might be doing to her? 

The whole thing made him feel bitter all over again. Rhys had gotten away with all of it, had been allowed to paint themselves as victims, as if the mask Rhys purported to wear was common knowledge. The rules were simply different for Rhys, for Feyre, for their whole court and sometimes, in his angrier moments, Lucien wished for a violent civil war that would finally oust the Night Court entirely.

He wouldn’t win any points with Elain on that front. 

“Does this mean you want to stay?” he questioned, hating how hopeful he felt. Her wanting to stay didn’t mean she wanted him, and a smarter male wouldn’t have let himself think any differently. It was just…well. She was here, and she wasn’t fighting him so hard, and Lucien couldn’t help but think that maybe she’d like him if she spent a little more time.

“Want? No. But I thought about what we talked about in my dream last night and I think if I ever want the life I imagined, I can’t go back.” 

She said the words as though she’d rehearsed them, unable to meet his gaze as she spoke them aloud. Practicing, he supposed, for when she inevitably had to tell Feyre the same. 

“Besides, Tamlin hardly speaks to me at all,” she added.

“He’s not good with people,” Lucien replied, lowering himself to his knees so he was beside her, though with enough space to not be touching her. 

“What happened between him and Feyre?” she asked, pulling off one of her gloves with her teeth. 

“Too much to explain, even if it was my story to tell,” Lucien replied, his words edged with frustration. “Maybe they were both cowards for how they handled their relationship, and cowards again for how they chose to deal with the aftermath.”

“I wonder if that’s what Gray thinks about me,” she murmured. Lucien wondered if she’d be angry if he ripped Graysen’s arms off his torso and beat him to death with them. Probably unhappy, but oh. Her fury might have been worth it.

“Why would he think that?” Lucien demanded sharply.

“Tamlin fell apart, didn’t he? So did I,” she said, drawing the absolute worst conclusion from what he’d been trying to say. 

“Different circumstances,” Lucien managed to get out. “Tamlin…had a responsibility to his people that he failed to uphold in his grief. You were…Elain, in the Cauldron, did you…”

She blinked up those soft, brown eyes at him. “Die?”

God, he couldn’t say the word, was strangled just hearing her say it. Lucien merely nodded, hoping his face didn’t betray him.

“Yes,” she whispered, looking down at her now bare hands. “It was…it was agonizing. I thought I’d been gone for years, but Feyre said it was a minute.”

“It was,” he whispered.

“And you were there,” she reminded him, as if Lucien had ever forgotten. “You and Tamlin.”

She’d said it once before, lost in the haze of her grief. Lucien had felt shame then, and he felt it now. “We didn’t know,” was all he could say to her, the only explanation for it.

“But you knew about Feyre,” she shot back, her own words dripping with condescension. Sometimes Lucien thought meeting Feyre was the worst thing that had ever happened to him. 

“I can’t explain—”

“Try.”

His temper flared. “Every single time I ever saw Rhys, he was making a joke about the casual violence he could inflict. He played a role, fine, I accept that, but how was I ever supposed to know? It wasn’t like he informed me when he was joking about my mothers death, or forcing me to bow while your own sister pissed herself with fear at his presence. We’re all dragged under the mountain where he’d lived for the last fifty years as the right hand man to Amarantha. Where he laughed when she ripped out my eye, and suggested she do the same with my tongue. So when your sister vanished with him, of course we assumed the worst. We were desperate—Amarantha modeled her court after his own.”

“She’s allowed to leave,” Elain said softly.

“I never said she wasn’t,” Lucien snapped back, his heart pounding in his throat. “But she was my friend and I—” 

Lucien rolled his shoulders, exhaling deeply. “I loved her like a sister. You don’t understand, and I can’t make you understand—and you don’t have to side with me, but when she left, she couldn’t read, and one day we get this letter from her with immaculate handwriting claiming it's from her. Rhys can control people with his mind, it's just…we couldn’t see her, couldn’t prove any of it was true.”

“Do you regret it?”

“Obviously,” he replied, holding her gaze. “But we can’t go back, only forward. Feyre was allowed to move on…the rest of us should, too.”

“She deserves happiness,” Elain offered quietly, as if Lucien doubted that.

“You do, too,” he offered, wondering what that looked like for her. He suspected she was starting to give her future a shape in her mind, even if that shape was merely get-as-far-away-from-this-place-as-I-can. It was better than hiding in Feyre’s sprawling, riverside estate day in and day out. And Elain could say whatever she liked, but he hadn’t seen those dead, glassy eyes since they’d begun holding her captive. 

Elain only shrugged her shoulders. “If you’re going to stay out here, you have to work, Lucien.”

A familiar refrain. He wasn’t pretending when he groaned, his back still sore from all the raking he’d done the day before. She demanded perfection, which was apparently somehow achievable though not by him. 

“Why don’t you start over there,” she added, pointing to where he’d finished the day before.

Outraged, Lucien replied, “I’ve already done it!”

“The rows need to be straight and orderly, otherwise the plant beds run into each other. You’ve got wavy rows.”

“I do not.”

“I’ve marked them off for you with string,” she continued, ignoring him entirely. “Just carefully carve them out.”

“This is why no one likes you, you know,” Lucien grumbled, rising to his feet. He expected that to piss her off—in truth, he shouldn’t have said it. It was meant to be a little good natured teasing, the same he’d give to anyone else. Elain, though…she always seemed so soft. So fragile. Even when she was snapping at him, her bottom lip seemed to tremble in warning. He braced himself for her sadness, her hurt.

“They don’t like me because I smell like you,” she snapped in response. Lucien’s barked out a laugh.

“Wet dog?”

“And sun baked trash,” she sniffed, sliding her hands back into the soil. A smile tugged at her mouth—she was pleased with herself.

“Get used to it,” Lucien said, earning a raised brow in return. He meant it, though. As long as she was speaking to him, and living nearby, Lucien didn’t intend to go anywhere. Even if this was all he could ever have—even if he could never be more than her friend.

It was enough.

[babymetaldoll]

Are you mine? - Chapter eighteen: "Truth or dare"

Summary: Spencer and his wife go through hell and their final decision is made. It's time to move on from the BAU. But before they leave, there is a little more trauma to deal with.  Word count: 13.670 Warnings: Cursing, spoilers of Criminal Mind (shocking, I know) lots of hate, but totally justified. A/N: So we finally got here. We can't act like we didn't know it wasn't going to happen. I can save Spencer from going to jail, but this awkward moment was a must in this story, mostly because I needed Spencer to have moved on with his life. I hated how the show tried to convinced us they were these basically crossed star lovers. NOPE.  Not in my watch, thank you very much. 

Series' Masterlist - Author's masterlist

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Spencer’s point of view 

Things I never thought I would say in my life: After being held hostage by a psychopath for the fourth time in my BAU career, me and my wife got serious about getting a new job and leaving the FBI.  

Which was my trigger? That time, she was there with me and held a point gun. And that's an image I will never erase from my mind.

That particular case was strange since the very first day. It all had started six months after the whole Linda Barnes disaster, when surprisingly I got an email that led me and a SWAT team to a storage unit, where we found what we thought was the corpse of an unsub’s victim, but that ended up being agent Owen Quinn, who had quit the FBI a year earlier.

- “So, how did we find him in that storage unit?”- Simmons asked when we reviewed Quinn’s history at the Bureau.

- “I got an email.”- I started explaining to the team what had happened when JJ interrupted me.

- “Spencer, you hate email.”- I looked at her and raised an eyebrow. Her comment was absolutely out of place. Who cared if I didn’t like modern formats of communication before? I had changed and didn't have to tell everyone or anyone about it.  

- “I hated it but it’s a must use at work. Also, Raven’s grades and updates from her teacher come by email. Just because I didn’t like something doesn’t mean I will hate it forever. I can evolve.” 

- “I’m… sorry.”- she mumbled as I continued to explain. I didn’t mean to argue with her, I just felt her comment was unnecessary. 

However, she didn’t stop there. After I briefed the team on what had happened and Prentiss instructed us on how to proceed, JJ followed me and confronted me in the hall. 

- “Hey…”- I turned around in the hall and stared at her looking at me in honest concern.- “Tell me not to worry.”

- “About what?”- I asked her, not getting her point. 

- “You got an email?”- her eyes stayed on mine, questioning what I was hiding.

- “I did, I just explained it.” 

- “Ok, maybe I'll buy that. Maybe. But why didn't you just call the rest of us? And why take a SWAT team to a storage unit in the middle of the night?”- she questioned and stared at me, trying to read me in case I was lying. 

- “I don’t understand JJ, what is it?”- I asked her, trying to push her to go to the point, ‘cos I was honestly lost.  

- “You're keeping secrets, ok? And when you keep secrets, I get nervous. Because the last time...

- “I did drugs? Had problems with my mother? Ended up going to Mexico behind everybody’s back to get her alternative medicine?”- I raised an eyebrow as I listed some of the things I had done behind her back. Now, why did she feel I had to tell her I did? I still have no idea. 

- “Yeah. So… Tell me not to worry.”

- “Don't worry. I didn’t keep it a secret. I told Emily and (Y/N). They helped me.”- I rested a hand on her shoulder and she put her hand on mine immediately. I took it as a nice gesture of support, so I continued talking. - “Whoever did this wanted me to find Quinn, and I needed to know why.

- “Do you even know him that well?"

- “No. I mean, I've seen him in the building occasionally, but that just made the whole thing weirder. So, I told Prentiss I needed an exigent circumstances exemption to the sabbatical. She made it happen, and… Now you know everything."- I summarized the whole deal and stared at Jennifer. She raised an eyebrow questioning my story.

- “Everything?”

- “About this case? Yes, everything.”

- “All right.”

JJ smiled at me, and I just nodded and walked away. I thought it was weird she was acting that way, but I guessed after everything that had happened the year before, she was worried anything stressful would push me out of the team, considering I was still taking some time off every trimester to teach classes at the academy. 

The fact she was so worried about me was somehow endearing. JJ had been my best friend for quite some time, and though we weren’t as close as we used to be, I still loved her. She was like a little sister to me. The entire team was my family, and she was a main part of it. 

After a few days, we thought we had solved the whole case. Instead of a serial killer, there had been a cult behind every death. We trapped the leader, a guy called Benjamin Merva who liked being called “Messiah,” and we were sure things were done. 

How very naive of us. 

The team left for drinks at Rossi’s after the case was solved - or so we thought- but my wife and I stayed at the Bureau. We had taken the mission of helping Quinn and his teenage son rebuild their relationship, very seriously. Why? Probably because both of us were scared our work at the BAU would affect our relationship with our kids in the future, but neither of us was ready to face it.

- “Unfortunately, I don't think I'm gonna be able to make it tonight.”- I took a step closer to JJ as we stood alone in the bullpen and she invited me to Rossi's one more time. 

- “Tell me not to worry.”- she whispered and looked at me as if she needed to read me. 

- “Don't. I'm good. I'm really good. There’s just something else I have to focus on.”- I explained as my phone rang and I read (Y/N)’s text from another room. Quinn’s son had arrived.  

- “Ok. Well… It's not family without you there.”

- “I know. But there's another family that could use my help right now.”- I said and placed the phone back into my pocket as JJ stared at me questioningly, so I felt pushed to give her all the details.- “(Y/N) and I are gonna try to smooth things between Quinn and his son, Shane. And then we are gonna have an evening with our babies. They deserve some quality time with us before bedtime.” 

- “You are an amazing father, Spencer.”- I smiled at her and wrapped her in my arms out of the blue. I don't usually give it a lot of thought, but I know I’ve changed a lot in the last couple of years. I stepped from being a germaphobe who avoided touching people to a mostly regular human. Or so I like to think. 

- “What's this for?”- JJ asked, confused as I let her go. 

- “It's for all the times you worried about me. I never said thank you. Thank you.

- “You're welcome.” 

I walked away from her feeling a little closer to my friend, thinking we take for granted so many things, working with the people we love was one of those. I was glad I had her and the rest of the team in my life. 

But things went south quickly. Too quickly to suspect it was a coincidence. When I found Shane, Quinn’s son, (Y/N) wasn’t with him anymore, she had gone to pick up Quinn. We waited for them a couple of minutes, as I told Shane what had happened with his father the entire year he hadn’t seen him. When my phone rang and it was JJ, I barely had time to register what she was saying, ‘cos a gunshot made me jump from my seat, grab my gun, and run out of the room, asking Shane to stay put. 

(Y/N)’s point of view 

I knew my luck was gonna run out eventually. I had been at the BAU for too long not to get hurt on the field again, or get under any dangerous situation. That day, I happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time: at the elevator when Agent Meadow, from ViCap, decided it was time to blow her cover, show us she was an accomplice of our unsub, and basically free her "messiah".

Penelope got in that elevator with us as well, she was on her way to Rossi’s and got in the middle of a very scary situation. Meadow shot Quinn and got me and Garcia into a car in the parking area at gunpoint. By the time Spencer was there, they had taken my gun, handcuffed me, and put me and Garcia into a car.

My husband came down the stairs and checked the perimeter. There he found Quinn, bleeding on the floor, and Meadow walked to him, pointing a gun at his head. 

- “Drop your gun, Agent Reid.”

- “It’s been you the whole time.”- my husband replied, not moving as he kept the gun in his hands pointing at her.

- “Yes, it was. Quinn somehow figured it out first. Pity having to shoot him, but he can’t give me what I want. But you can.”

- “And what is that?”- Spencer asked coldly. Penelope looked at me, as we both were kept in that car with a guy pointing a gun at our heads.    

- “You and I are gonna go upstairs and free my messiah.”- Meadow was clearly delusional if she believed Spencer would just do as she demanded. 

- “You are in the heart of the FBI”- my husband replied. - “As soon as the rest of my team figures out it was you, you’ll be dead before you walk out that door.”

- “Then we might need to work quickly.” 

- “I’m not cooperating with you. You might as well shoot me.”

- “I have a better idea.”- and after that bitch shook her head, the driver moved the car so Spencer could see me and Garcia had been taken hostage, and the asshole pointing a gun at our head pulled my hair to force me to stay still.

The second we locked eyes, I could read the fear in his look. He didn’t see it coming, obviously. I felt so stupid for being taken by the unsub. I should have been wiser.  

- “Spencer, just shoot her!! Shoot her!!”- I yelled, but my husband threw his gun away and surrendered in a second. He didn’t even hesitate. I knew he would never put my safety in jeopardy, but I hated helping those wackos get their fake messiah back and get away from the FBI. Which was exactly what happened next.

It didn’t get better when they took us to a warehouse filled with people and packed things, clearly they were moving somewhere else. Meadow walked to us with a briefcase 

- “I wasn’t planning on taking you, but let me thank you for your help.”- she said, staring at me with a delish grin.- “He's given me everything I need.” 

- “Of course he has, he is protecting his family. You do anything to protect those you love.”- I replied with so much anger and hate I expected her to get mad at me. But instead, she just shook her head. 

- “Funny. You say that as if I wouldn't know.” 

- “Do you know? Really? ‘Cos as fast as I know, you are a fucking psychopath, like all the ones you pretended to help us catch for years.”

- “Yes!”- Penelope supported me, her words filled with hate.- “You’ve abducted us, you've tricked the FBI for years, and you worship that Benjamin Merva guy.”

- “I need your handiwork.”- Meadow demanded as she opened the briefcase, showing Gacia a computer.  

- “Let me see Reid.”- my friend replied and didn’t hesitate. 

- “He isn't here.”- I huffed and shook my head while she was still talking.  

- “Come on, bitch, you are dealing with a profiler here. If you are gonna lie, do it better.”

- “Like I lied to the entire FBI for years?”- I wanted to end her, right there. It was so frustrating being handcuffed.  

- “Do you need my help”- Garcia asked.- “Then bring Reid.” 

- “Does it look like you are the one calling the shots, Penelope?”- Meadow questioned and my friend replied without hesitation. 

- “I will die before I help you.”- the guy next to Meadow grabbed his gun, but the fake FBI agent stared at us and walked away. I guess she really needed Garcia’s help, because less than ten minutes later, some random guy who looked like a bodyguard, completely armed, showed up pushing my husband. 

- “Oh my god”- I gasped at the sight of him. He was bruised, he had clearly received a heavy beating. He was thrown to us, and he fell on his knees right next to my chair. 

- “I’m ok, chipmunk. I swear.”- he tried to look at me with a smile, but my eyes watered up at the sight of him and I had to make a major effort not to start crying right away.- “How are you? Have they hurt you?”

- “I’m good, they haven’t… don’t worry about me.”- I tried to reply with a calm voice, but it kept breaking due to emotion, fear, and anger. 

- “Why are they doing this? What do they want?”- Garcia asked as I just bit my lips, staring at my husband, thinking maybe this time we weren’t gonna outsmart the bad guys.

- “Me. They want me.”- Spencer replied but didn’t stop staring at me like it was the last time.  I felt he wanted to engrave every detail of that conversation in his brain as if it were our last time together.

- “What? Why?”- I asked as Spencer moved closer to me.  

- “I’ll be their last victim.˝

- “Why you?”- Garcia asked the right question, I couldn’t even speak. I just looked at Spencer, fear all over my face. 

- “I don’t know. I overheard them. There have been hundredths.”- Meadows walked over and gave Garcia a computer. I tried to move closer to my husband, I needed to touch him, feel him, protect him. But what happened next brought me to the edge.  

- “I gave you what you wanted. Now it's your turn.”- Meadow grabbed her gun and put it against my husband’s head, staring at Garcia- “Or I'll blow his big, beautiful brains out.” 

And without another word, Garcia started working. Meadow kept a close eye on what she was doing, giving detailed instructions of what she Pen had to do. Meanwhile, I just stared at Spencer, trying to burn in my brain every feature, every inch of her skin, his hair, the way his eyes looked under the light. In case anything happened to any of us, I didn’t want to forget anything. My husband, the love of my life, was right there with me, but who knew what could happen to us in only a few minutes.

When Meadow’s cell phone rang and she turned her back to us, we were able to finally speak to each other. 

- “They've got a firewall, so there's no way to warn the team, but they're coming for us. You know they are.”- Garcia started rambling as he typed as if, literally, her life depended on it. - “We're gonna be ok. We have to be ok.”- I turned to her and tried to comfort her with a small smile, but I don’t think I made it, because as soon as she saw me, she continued talking.- “No, munchkin, it’s gonna be ok, right Spencer? We're not gonna die here. This can't be how our story ends.” 

- “Garcia…”- I started, but our friend just ignored me and continued talking.

- “What can we do? They'll trade. We'll make a barter!”- and before we could stop her, she raised her voice, but was luckily ignored- “Take me!”

- “No.”- Spencer’s words sounded bitter like he was already resigned.

- “The team needs you.”- Garcia pointed out with tears in her eyes. 

- “No, they don't. They need you.”- my husband stared at our friend, trying to comfort her.- “And you, chipmunk. You have to…-” 

- “No, we are not doing this.”- I replied and bit my lips so as not to cry.- “You are not saying goodbye.”  

- “Please, you have to listen. If I can’t make it… our babies.”

- “They need us.”- I said before another word could come from my husband’s lips. 

- “You two are the most brilliant minds in the entire BAU. What can we do to get out of here?”- Garcia whispered as Meadows walked to her and pointed at the computer. 

- “You've got one minute.”

- “I hate you.”- I don’t think I had ever heard Penelope say those words before. 

- “I don't care.”

The way that psycho bitch delivered those words confirmed my husband’s thought: he was who they wanted. She actually didn’t care about Garcia, and by the way she treated me, she also didn’t care much if I lived or died. However, Spencer was important to her. He was part of her plan all along. But why? 

- “(Y/N), listen to me.”- Spencer whimpered and nearly started crying, but I could read him from miles away. He was bluffing.

- “What is it, Spencer?”- I replied sweetly, playing along.

- “Please tell our kids…”- Meadow’s cell phone rang again, and as she walked away, my husband moved closer to me and Garcia and whispered. 

- “They're taking me and Theo.”

- “Theo's here?”- Pen asked, shocked

- “We'll distract them. The car we were in is right outside the door. We're 18 minutes away from Quantico. Turn left outside the parking lot, and take a right at the light. You'll recognize the rest. They stayed off the highways.”- I nodded as he kept his eyes on me, giving me directions step by step.

- “Ok, ok, but what about you?”- I asked, not willing to leave him behind. 

- “I'll delay them.”

- “Spencer, I don’t…”

- “(Y/N), get the rest of the team back here, and do not worry about me.”

It was how he had said my name and the stern way he looked at me. He had made up his mind, and there was no way back. If I wanted to do something to keep my husband safe, I needed to bring the team and rescue him. But before I left, I had to tell him something I had been keeping to myself.  

- “I think I’m pregnant.”- Spencer wide opened his eyes and for a moment, time stopped.

- “W… wh… what?”- he mumbled, trying to collect himself. 

- “So you better stay alive, because I am not doing this alone.”  

- “Time's up!”- Meadows walked towards us again and forced Spencer to stand up from the ground. I followed his every movement and stood in front of him. 

- “It's all happening. Ten twenty-three.”- he whispered right before they took him away from me. I couldn’t even touch him one last time. 

Had that been the last time I had seen my husband? I refused to think so. 

- “Get to it. Now”- Meadows commanded Garcia and turned to cut me a nasty look. My hands were still tight, so I couldn’t handle her myself, but I managed to spit her face when she was close enough, earning one nasty slap across my cheek. 

- “Don’t make me kill you before my master wishes.” 

- “Yeah, nobody wants to spoil that party.”- my snarky reply made that crazy psycho raise an eyebrow and then, her fist hit me right on the cheekbone, nearly knocking me out of my chair. 

Spencer’s point of view 

That day my entire world was upside down. I knew I had to keep myself together, that I had to trust the team would see the footage of our abduction and find my sign language hidden message, connect it with The Believers, and find us. I knew they would. But my main concern at that minute was getting my wife out of there. The two of us couldn’t be abducted. Our kids needed their parents, at least one of them, to be safe. And that had to be my wife. I knew she would take good care of our babies if anything happened to me. I also knew I could never continue living if anything would ever happen to her. 

Under any danger, she had to live. Even if that meant I had to die to save her. Especially after her last confession. If she was in fact pregnant, I had to save her and our baby. 

So I created a distraction, with Theo’s help. And (Y/N) and Garcia managed to escape. I knew they were gonna find me, I had given (Y/N) the way to discover our location. It was her and the thought of our babies that kept me sane the entire time. For hours, I held onto every memory I had with them to keep hoping I was coming out of that alive just to hug them tight. 

It hadn't been easy, I have to be honest. Not when I was already tight to a pole, surrounded by the entire cult, who were there to witness my death. I even tried to delay them by making a speech, with the lame excuse of having something to share before my sacrifice. They were actually repeating a “Protect us from all harm. Let the sacrifice behind” mantra as Merva said a prayer. 

Then, suddenly, we all heard a gunshot and the crowd started yelling and ducking. Merva knew what was coming: my team, So, he quickly grabbed a knife and ran to me, putting the blade against my neck in less than five seconds. (Y/N)’s voice was like the rumble of thunder that froze him when she yelled his name, but instead of yielding, Merva tried to fulfill his mission. And then came the gunshot. 

My wife pulled the trigger and ran to me so fast, I don’t think Merva was actually dead yet when she started untying me. 

- “I’m ok, I’m ok.”- I started repeating when I noticed her eyes were watering up as she moved her fingers frantically on the ties. Emily ran to Merva and checked his vitals as the rest of the team along with a SWAT unit cleared the perimeter. 

- “Thank you so much.”- I held (Y/N) against me the second she managed to free my wrist and felt her body shaking as she finally relaxed and all the emotions hit her at once. 

- “Did they hurt you?”- she mumbled against my chest and I just shook my head, knowing she knew I was lying, and tried to calm her down. 

- “I am ok, chipmunk. Thank you for saving my life.”- her arms kept me locked against her, but I couldn’t complain. That was exactly where I wanted to be.  

(Y/N) sobbed and I kissed the top of her head. A few of my own tears fell down my cheeks. For a second, I thought I wouldn’t make it out of there alive, and I finally felt it was the right time. 

- “We should start looking for another job.”- I whispered in her ear as she continued crying and nodded. It was just between us, we didn’t want to talk to Emily yet. But we had to start our plan to leave the BAU. 

Emily gave us a few days off, and we decided to spend them at home with our babies. The first thing on the list was hugging them, snuggling with them, and spending an entire day doing what they loved most. We drew, watched movies, played with dolls, cars, and trains, and had so many tea parties.  

I also stared at my wife as many times as I could. I stared at her as she cooked dinner for us, as she fed Vincent his veggies- though he argued he didn’t need them to grow up healthy. I kept my eyes on her when she read Raven bedtime stories and when she braided her hair. But mostly, I stared at her as she lay asleep beside me on our bed, thanking life for letting me enjoy another day by her side. 

The following morning after our abduction, I drove to the drugstore and picked up a few different pregnancy home tests. (Y/N) stayed at home with the kids and was probably getting mentally ready to deal with the outcome of that test. We always said we wanted a big family, but we had planned our previous babies. If (Y/N) was in fact pregnant, it would be a gigantic surprise. Not that I wouldn’t be happy, it would just be unexpected. 

When I returned home, (Y/N) was sitting on the floor with Raven, playing with her dolls. Vincent was sitting on her lap, fighting the nap he clearly didn’t want to sleep, though his eyes were closing every few seconds. 

- “Daddy!”- Raven stood up and ran to me.- “Mommy is teaching a class for all my Barbies, so they can be doctors, like you!” 

- “That sounds so much fun! Can I take the class?”

- “But you are not a Barbie, daddy.”- I picked Raven in my arms and kissed her cheeks and she started giggling immediately. 

- “Are you gonna do it now?”- I asked as my wife grabbed the paper bag with all the pregnancy tests I got her in the drugstore. 

- “Do you want me to do it now?”- she asked and smirked, probably knowing how anxious I felt. Yet, I tried to play it cool.  

- “No, you don’t have to do it now. Maybe after dinner.”- I pointed at the babies, hinting it was better to do it after they were asleep. My wife just nodded and continued playing with Raven. I took Vinny in my arms and let him sleep on my chest as I laid on the couch in the living room and just enjoyed the moment of peace I had knowing my entire family was safe, there in that room with me. 

But of course, I couldn’t stop thinking about the possibility of my wife being pregnant again. It seemed like a dream. We hadn’t even planned it, so I don’t know if it was actually possible, (Y/N) was very responsible with her pills. However, if her suspicions were true, I would have been the happiest man alive. The more kids, the better for me. If Raven and Vincent made me feel overjoyed, another kid would be a blessing. 

- “It’s killing you not knowing, is it?”- (Y/N) whispered as she leaned closer to me when Raven ran to her room to pick a few toys to play with. 

- “I don’t know what you are talking about.”- I murmured from behind the book I was holding though my mind was running so fast I wasn’t really reading, and Vincent still softly snored on my chest. 

- “Oh really? Then why haven’t you flipped the page in over fifteen minutes?”- I was busted and I knew it, but I didn’t want to be pushy. 

- “I just don’t want to disturb my son’s nap.”- I replied and raised an eyebrow as I stared at my wife, who had a cocky smile on her lips. 

- “Sure, sure.”- Raven ran back into the room that minute, and (Y/N) murmured before she could listen.- “Maybe I’ll wait until the morning to be really sure.”

- “Oh come on!”- my reaction wasn’t planned or even analyzed, I just lost it for a second, Vinny woke up and (Y/N) burst out laughing. 

- “I don’t wanna torture you, Batsy.” 

- “Don’t torture daddy!”- Raven said nearly shocked.- “We don’t have to be mean to our family.”- (Y/N) bit her lips and just nodded, as I shushed our son, who was still half asleep. 

- “You are right baby, I’m sorry hon. I’m going to the bathroom now. I’ll be back in three minutes.” 

I followed her with my eyes as Vinny fell asleep quickly on me one more time, and Raven kept singing the Baby Shark song underbreath, while she made her dolls dance along. 

Those were the longest four minutes of my life, and when (Y/N) came back, she sat on the couch next to me and sighed. 

- "So?"- I asked and she simply ignored the pink elephant in the room.

- “We are gonna have to get some groceries later today.”- I frowned, not getting why she said that when I was waiting for another information.- “I’m gonna need a lot of saltine crackers, ginger, lemon tea, and some jello.” 

I stared at my wife smiling at me, as I felt my grin grow bigger and bigger and the tears threatened to fall from my eyes. 

- “I love you so much, chipmunk.”- I managed to whisper as she rested her head on my shoulder and caressed Vinny’s head, who was softly snoring one more time against my chest.

- “I love you more, honey.”

(Y/N)’s point of view

The following months were crazy because we had to move to our new house sooner than we had originally planned. I didn’t want to do it too far into my pregnancy because I knew it would be extremely stressful and tiring for all of us. 

The entire family helped, our friends included. It was hard for Spencer to leave our old apartment behind, I could read it on his face. But it was too small for all of us, and our babies deserved more space, a backyard to play in, a neighborhood to ride their bikes on, and the best childhood we could give them. 

Those were some crazy months. We had decided to quit the FBI and then discovered I was pregnant. So we decided to stay for another year and leave when things weren’t as crazy as they were at that point. We didn’t want people to know our plans, so we decided not to share the news with anyone until the date got closer. 

Somehow, after that shitty case when Spencer and I got kidnapped along with Garcia, things were a little calmer. Luke moved in with his girlfriend, Emily started dating Special Agent Andrew Mendoza (and of course, thought she could keep it a secret from us) and Rossi got engaged to Krysstal, with a K. Spencer took a month sabbatical to teach a symposium on medieval violence and criminology, which was great considering how pregnant I got after the first trimester, that third baby wasn’t hiding at all. 

One of the good things that happened that year was that Mikey became a dad. He had married Rachel a year earlier, she was a coworker and the only nice girlfriend that poor guy had ever had. She was so cool we could all just hang out together and enjoy our time.

I knew my best friend felt he was “late” in things in life. He wanted to be a dad and do all the things he always dreamt of doing with his baby girl. The day Olivia was born, Mikey was ecstatic. He ran out of the delivery room and started jumping while his parents, Lu, Frank, Spencer, and myself stood in front of him, ready to hear the news. 

- “She’s perfect!!”- Mikey basically yelled and we all cheered. 

I remember hugging my best friend and hearing him sob against my shoulder. Tears of happiness and fear. Later on, one day I was alone with him and the babies, he told me the most touching and heavy thing I had heard from him since I joined the FBI.  

- “I always hated your job ‘cause it took you away way too often. But I had never understood how important it is what you do until Olivia got here. You make this world safer for her. Thank you, nugget.” 

It made me wanna cry to think I was ready to turn my back to that life. But I couldn’t fight crime forever. I had to do what was best for my family. 

Things started going south a few weeks before Rossi’s wedding. That was when we met Everett Lynch, the unsub that got under Rossi’s skin. Papa Pasta suffered on the field, he was nearly choked when he tried to fight the unsub, and the bastard got away. Poor David got the hit right where it hurts the most: in the ego. In the following weeks, he got obsessed with catching that dude but eventually was forced to let it go. At least for a while. 

Two days before Rossi’s wedding, we were running low on cases. The first day we finished all of our paperwork, but by day two with no work, we decided to kill time with some Poker.

I remember that day we were all in a great mood. We sat around the table in the conference room with some snacks. Garcia showed up with some jelly beans to use as chips for a poker game. Luke kept asking if we got to go home if there was nothing to do, and Lewis was teasing him about anything you could imagine. I was six months pregnant and my current craving was dill pickles popcorn, a mix none of my friends understood, and they all stared at me, disgusted as I ate.

I also remember clearly Spencer had scored 200 on his shooting qualification test that morning, and I didn’t like the way JJ looked at him when Luke told us. But I decided to put it aside ‘cos I was sure it was all in my head. I laughed when Simmons commented he thought Spencer would be the hot seat of the game, and I proudly informed him my husband was banned for life from every casino in Las Vegas, Laughlin, and Pahrump because of his card counting ability. 

- “I love how you always sound so proud when you bring that up.”- Emily teased me and I just grinned, caressing my belly. 

- “I am very proud of all of my husband’s skills.”- I replied and noticed how JJ looked down as the rest of the team laughed.

- “Keep it G rated for Christ's sake! I don’t wanna have that kind of image in my head right now.”- Penelope argued and my husband just sipped what was left of his cup, looking away with a silly smile, blushed. 

- “Can we circle back to the casino banning?”- Simmons pointed out and looked at Spencer.- “Is it true?”

- “With a deck of 52 cards, the number of combinations is a factorial of 52. You simply need to calculate your outs and then your implied odds. Math is the basis of all card games.”- Spencer explained proudly and everyone just nodded, not following his mathematical explanation. 

- “All right, ladies and gentlemen. Today's game's five cards. Roll them out. The big blind is 50. The baby is 25.”- Lewis chuffed the deck and Prentiss leaned closer to me looking confused.

- “We are still playing poker, right?”

- “Yes ma’am, but I don’t know if I’ll follow it for much longer considering how sleepy I am.” 

- “You can nap on the couch in my office.”- she offered and I sighed with a smile. 

- “Thank you, Em. I will consider it if my eyes start shouting” 

Forty minutes later, I ran out of popcorn, which led me to start eating the jelly beans I had to bet, and ended up folding. I was too sleepy to think and it was fun watching my husband kicking everybody’s ass. That until the last hand. I remember staring at the scene from my chair thinking it was weird the way JJ pushed all of her jelly beans to the center of the table making eye contact with my husband the entire time. She was being seductive and it made me feel uncomfortable. Or was she just bluffing? Playing along with the poker charade. I couldn’t tell, I didn’t know and I didn’t want to be a paranoid wife. So I didn’t say a word and just stared at her and Spencer interacting. 

- “Do you think the lady's bluffing?”- Luke asked as we all stared at them in silence. 

- “I know the lady's bluffing because she has a tell.”- Spencer explained and looked at JJ with a cocky smile. A cocky and very hot smile, if you ask me. 

- “No, I don't.”- JJ whispered and raised an eyebrow. Spencer simply grabbed all of his remaining jelly beans and pushed them to the middle of the table saying he was going all in and then winked at me. I cut him a short smile, still uncomfortable, but knowing he didn’t even realize it was weird. Probably no one else did, actually. It was me who had always had a weird sensation when it came to JJ. Lu said it was because Spencer had had a crush on her before we met and I was crazy insecure, which was true. But no one could shake from me that there was something weird there. 

- “Oh, I like it. Live by the sword, die by the sword.”- Luke was really enjoying that game- “I call.”

- “All right, let's see 'em.”- Tara commanded and Alvez showed his hand. He had three of a kind, king high.- “Perfectly respectable, but not getting it done.”- Lewis added and we all looked at Spencer. 

- “Pair of kings, pair of sevens.”- he placed the cards in front of him and smiled evilly- “Oh, I'm sorry, three sevens.”

I chuckled at his excited and villainous smile. He looked so sweet. The rest of the team made “ohh” in a chorus and Spencer kept his eyes on JJ, waiting for her response.  

- “A full boat from the sassy Dr. Reid.”- Lewis announced and JJ simply left her cards on the table. She didn’t stop staring at my husband the entire time. I didn’t really like it one bit, but I thought it was the hormones. I didn't want to be a crazy pregnant woman, paranoid and scared to lose her husband. 

- “Oh, a straight flush! That has to hurt!”- Lewis was really enjoying the game.  

- “Gentlemen.”- JJ smiled as she collected all of her jellybeans. Spencer looked defeated for a second, but then a shy smile appeared on his face. I held his hand and he caressed it with his in a second. 

- “I think that Reid is speechless.”- Simmon teased him and he just shook his head. 

- “Guess I'm a better liar than you thought.”- JJ said and stared at Spencer for a few seconds, until he laughed and turned to me. 

- “Do you need a refill of popcorn, chipmunk?” 

- “No, thank you, hon. I’m actually considering a nap on Prentiss’s couch. She offered it earlier and I think I could use a little extra sleep. 

- “Sounds like a nice plan. I could come with you and read a little.”

Sadly, those plans were soon discharged because Emily turned to us after getting a text and said the words I learned to hate the most: 

- “We've got a case.” 

We took the jet to Los Angeles. Rossi included. He was with Krystall going through the last details of their upcoming wedding when we were briefed but made it to the jet on time. 

- “I don’t think you should be going to out-of-town cases anymore, (Y/N).”- Prentiss said as we got ready to take off.- “You are way into your pregnancy to fly.” 

- “I don’t think Rossi should be going on this field trip.”- I replied just to annoy my unit chief.- “Captain Cannelloni is gonna marry in two days. That’s sooner than my delivery date.” 

- “Just for your information, I promised Krystall I would be back on time for the ceremony, so let’s try to catch this guy as fast as possible.”- Rossi sat in front of me and added with a wink- “And it’s Papa Pasta for you.” 

- “Maybe we should consider this your last case out of town”- Spencer sat by my side and offered me a bottle of water. - “Garcia would be glad to have you as a sidekick again.” 

- “She will overfeed me and the kid would be thrilled.”- I replied with a little smile.- “But I’ll miss you too much.” 

- “Oh please stop it.”- Rossi argued right away.- “You’ve been married forever. There is no way you are still this adorable. I can not take it anymore.”

I rested my head on my husband’s shoulder and he caressed my six-month belly carefully. 

- “Don’t encourage them.”- Emily warned him.- “You know they can be worse.”

- “So much worse.”- I added and Rossi just smiled at me. 

Eighteen hours after we had landed, and already had identified the unsub and his M.O. Casey Pinkner was a piece of work, as Garcia categorized. He had spent most of his youth in and out of the system, had problems with alcohol, and had been in jail for eight years. In fact, he had been free for only four weeks and he was already deep in shit.

But that wasn’t the worst part. No. It was the fact Spencer was currently held hostage in a jewelry store by the unsub along with JJ, the judge who sentenced him to jail, and her daughter. 

It was the same shit all over again, and I couldn't deal with it anymore. Was my husband coming home with me that night? Was he going to make it safe? My heart and my stomach were a knot. My hands were shaking, I wasn’t taking it well. You can blame the hormones, I know I did, but honestly, I knew it was exhaustion. I didn’t want to be through that hell one more time. I didn’t want my husband in danger. We couldn't do that job for another day. 

I knew we had set our quitting date after the baby was born, but at that moment, I didn’t know if I could go on like that. My mental health was in danger every time my husband’s safety was in jeopardy.  

- “Rear entrance has been barricaded as well.”- Simmons announced as we stood out of the store. Emily didn’t want me there and begged me to stay at the station, but nothing would stop me from trying to save my husband that night. And I don't think anyone dared try to keep me away.  

- “Eyewitnesses put four or five people inside.”- the police chief added. 

- “What about security cameras?”- I asked, feeling Rossi put a hand on my shoulder, trying to help me stay grounded and calm. 

- “Employee says they're cheap, routed off of some server in China. We're trying to access them now.” 

- “Get Garcia on it.”- David asked Simmons, and he just nodded and walked away. 

- “Rapid response team is gearing up in the back."- the chief of police announced. -"As soon as they find a point of vulnerability, I want to go in strong.” 

- “No. No, that's a bad idea.”- Tara stopped the chief and shook her head. I nearly jumped on him to tell him that was the stupidest thing to do all things considered, but Rossi stopped me with his arm around me, as he said. 

- “Let's build a line of communication, start there.”- David's words sounded like a command, though he would have called his idea a “suggestion” instead.- “We've got two of our best agents in there. We need to trust that they'll keep things under control until we can find a way in.” 

The chief of police agreed and walked away. As soon as it was just me, Rossi, and Tara, I spoke my mind. 

- “The problem with that plan is that Casey is not likely to ask for anything. I mean, what he wants is the people who put him in jail and he has them. We can't negotiate with a guy who doesn't want anything.” 

- “We’ll find a way to get to him, (Y/N).”- Rossi assured me.- “They are gonna be fine.” 

But a few minutes later we realized building a fucking line of communication was impossible. No one picked up the phone inside, proving my point, which made me so angry I nearly started shouting curses at anyone who dared cross my way. Simmons’ announcement was the one thing that kept me sane that second. 

- “I got Garcia. She's seconds away from accessing the security feed. Go ahead, Garcia. We got the laptop.”- it took her a few seconds more, but finally, I had eyes on my husband.

- “This is live.”- Garcia announced.

- “I’m gonna kill that mother fucker.”- I whispered as soon as I saw my husband tied on the floor, JJ was standing, talking with the unsub, probably trying to find a way to get out of there.   

- “Ok. Alright, it looks like Reid and JJ are tied up, and it's the shop manager who was shot. Right? Look. She's still moving.”- Tara pointed out, but sadly, all I could see was Spencer. 

- “Do we have audio?”- Simmons asked. 

- “Yes, it should be on right… now.”- and as she spoke, we heard what was happening inside the store. 

- “Is that a door?”- Simmons noticed.

- “Where?”- I asked, trying to find it on the outside of the store. 

- “Right here. Far left wall.” 

- “Ok agent…”- the unsub asked JJ and she replied coldly. That was the first sound we got from inside the shop.

- “Jareau.” 

- “Agent Jareau. Truth or dare?”

- “Truth.”- Jennifer answered without hesitation. 

- “If I think you're lying or stretching the truth in the slightest, I'll kill him.”- Casey, the unsub, screamed and pointed at my husband with the gun. - “You ever shoot anybody before?”

- “Yes, I have.”- JJ answered right away. 

- “You enjoy it?” 

- “No.”- there was a deep silence after Jennifer answered. Casey walked away from her, and then suddenly, he turned around and shot around, screaming. 

- “Liar!!”- I gasped and held my belly. The shot had hit the chair right next to Spencer. A few inches and he would have been hurt. Maybe even…

- “No, no, no. I'm not lying!”- JJ argued frenetically- “I'm not lying! The people I shot I had no choice, but I did not enjoy it. I didn't!” 

Tara held my hand as we stared at the scene. I couldn’t deal with the image of Spencer just sitting there, defenseless at the will of a killer, while I just stood outside, unable to do anything to help him. 

- “Ok, you asked, and I told the truth, ok. I told you the truth.”- JJ continued talking.- “So now it's my turn. Right? That's how this game's played. We take turns.”- she was buying some time, but I didn’t know if Casey was gonna let her.- “Truth or dare?” 

- “Truth.”- of course he picked that. Psycho.

- “What's it gonna take for all of us to walk out of here alive, for this to end peacefully?” 

- “I ain't going back to prison.”- he simply replied and no one could argue with it.- “My turn. Truth or dare?” 

- “Truth.”- JJ said and kept making eye contact with the unsub, trying to find a way to get to him.  

- “I want you to say something you're afraid to say, that you'd never tell anybody.”- his face was red in anger as he kept pointing his gun at her.- “And you better make it good, 'cause if it's not, it's gonna be the last thing you ever say.”

Casey made a pause and I held my breath. All I could think of at that moment was how stupid I felt for being jealous of JJ. It had been stupid, she was my friend. I shouldn’t think of her that way, she would never do anything to hurt me or my family. Stupid hormones got me all crazy.

- “What's it gonna be?!”- Casey pushed her. 

- “There are only a few people I trust in this world.”- JJ’s answer wasn’t good enough. 

- “Boring!”- the unsub whined and shot the judge in the leg. I nearly jumped on the spot as I stared at the scene. For a second, I thought he was going to hurt my husband. 

- “Next!”- Casey yelled and pointed the gun back at Jennifer. 

- “Um… My…”- JJ started stuttering.- “My baby I lost, I, um… I wanted to name her Maggie.” 

- “Wrong! Come on, you can do better than that!”- the unsub yelled and my husband innocently tried to interfere. 

- “Casey…”

- “Shut up!”- but of course, he wasn’t gonna have it. He walked to JJ and forced her to kneel. 

- “Ok, ok, ok.”- she replete and nodded at him, surrendering. 

- “Last chance. Something you would never say aloud, not even to your partner here. Your deepest, darkest secret. Impress me or I kill him.” 

I gasped and held my belly. I felt my whole body shaking at the thought of losing Spencer. 

Not a sound was made for a few seconds. JJ was crying, desperate to find something that would save everybody. But she was running out of time. 

- “Come on!”- Case wasn’t having any of it, his patience was nonexistent. 

- “Spence, um…”- JJ hesitated before she continued talking. My husband turned to her in silence, just listening to what she had to say.- “Um…”

JJ was crying, whatever it was that she was going to say, she wasn’t lying, and it was hurting her to confess it. Whatever it was, I was sure it wasn’t as bad as… 

- “I've always loved you, Spence.”

It felt like a bad joke at first. Of course, she was lying. She had to say whatever she could to get out of there alive. She was forced to say something like that.    

- “And I was just too scared to say it before.”- JJ was crying her eyes out as she clearly confessed the darkest secret she had ever had. 

I didn't even have to analyze the whole situation or use my profiler abilities to know it was real. She was confessing being in love with my husband and Rossi, Tara, Penelope, Simmons and I were listening. I wasn’t making it up. It was real. JJ was in love with my husband. 

My biggest fear was real.

- “And things are just really too complicated to say it now.”- JJ was sobbing and Spencer wasn’t moving. I bet he wasn’t even blinking at that point. His friend was dropping a bomb and he was there, silent, not knowing what to say, or how to react. - “I’m sorry. But you should know.”- JJ whimpered.  

- “Hot damn!”- Casey chuckled.- “That's what I'm talking about! Now those are some last words right there. But not good enough to save your life.” 

My heart stopped the second I heard a gunshot. But that time, it wasn’t Casey’s. It was Spencer. He had freed himself somehow and shot the unsub with his second gun. 

- “We are going in.”- Rossi announced a second later. I wiped off the tears from my face, grabbed my gun, and rushed in along with the team.

- “(Y/N), wait, I don’t think you should…”- Tara put a hand on my shoulder and looked at me, worried.

- “I’m not gonna shoot her, if that’s what you are afraid of.”- I replied and kept moving. I wish I could tell you I was certain of my words, but honestly, I didn’t know what I was going to do. 

I followed the SWAT Unit and Rossi’s lead, holding my gun tight. I heard JJ’s voice announcing we had three people hurt and that we needed an ambulance. I tried to ignore her voice and the reaction it caused in me as I rushed inside and looked at Spencer. His eyes were blurry, and his mind was clearly uneasy. My husband wasn’t well at all. I was sure that confession was messing with his head in more ways than he would ever admit. 

But as soon as he saw me, his eyes watered up and I rushed into his arms. 

- “What are you doing here?”- he asked as I sobbed against his chest.- “Chipmunk, you shouldn’t be on the field. What if…” 

- “I can’t… I couldn’t stay away. I…”- Spencer kissed the top of my head and held me closer.

- “I’m ok. I’m ok. Nothing happened.”- he whispered and caressed my hair. I tried to calm myself down, but things were definitely at a new level of wrong. 

- “We all heard her.”- I whispered and looked into Spencer’s eyes. He seemed shocked by the news, he probably thought I was never going to know what had happened. Maybe his plan was never telling me about it. It sounded like the type of plan Spencer came up with to deal with things he didn't want to burden me with. It could have been the right decision… or not. I don’t know. I don’t think I’ll ever know.  

- “How… why… How are you?”- he asked and looked as worried as if I was the one who hurt the most by that confession. Around us, Rossi checked Casey on the floor, and the rest of the team took care of the hostages and the wounded. I wasn’t being professional at all. All I cared about at that second was my husband's well-being. 

- “I don’t know how to deal with this now."- I confessed and kept him close to me- "You?” 

- “I don’t think it’s relevant.”- he replied bluntly.- “I don’t even know if it’s actually true.” 

- “It is.”- there was no doubt in my words and Spencer knew it. He knew JJ wasn’t lying as well, but he kept trying to protect me. Or to deny the inevitable. 

- “We don’t have to talk about it now, ma cherie. Let’s get out of here, ok?”- that was when I realized Spencer’s hand had been cut.

- “You need a medic.”- I held his hand and stared at the injury. 

- “It’s not serious, just a small cut.”

- “Stop that. You have to get help. Come on.”

I held Spencer’s good hand as we walked out of the room. I refused to look at JJ because I knew myself. I was going to make a scene and that wasn’t the place or the time to face her. 

I could feel her gaze on us, though. I didn’t know if she was aware we had all heard her love confession, but she kept an eye on us, or at least on Spencer as the medics took care of his hand outside the jewelry store. We stopped by the police station afterward to pick up all of our things and finally rushed to the jet. We were all late, Rossi still had to get married the following day at noon. 

No one mentioned JJ’s confession, not when I was around, at least. I knew Rossi wanted to bring it up but didn’t know how or when. He had probably talked to Emily about it already. I don’t know. Maybe I was just being paranoid. All I could think of was that I had been right all along. All those times I felt JJ was staring at Spencer or acting flirty with him, or whatever detail that showed her true feelings hadn’t been paranoid. I had been right. 

Honestly, at that point in my life, I wished I had been wronged because I was forced to face the fact my so-called friend was in love with my husband. She had used the word “love.” Not crushed, not interested, not even hot for him. She was in love. 

And I wanted to kill her.  

- “Chipmunk, I….”- Spencer stood in front of me outside the jet, as the rest of the team boarded.- “I don’t care what she said. I honestly don���t. Even if it was true, I don’t love Jennifer. I am not in love with her. Never was, never will.”- he placed his wounded hand carefully on my belly and the other one cupped my cheek. 

- “I know that…”- I whispered and looked down at my feet because it was a lie. I had always feared my husband’s feelings for JJ. Ever since we were just friends. Why? I don’t know! It was irrational. Just plain fear and insecurities. 

- “The only thing that matters is that I love you.”- Spencer added under his breath, and caressed my belly.  

- “I…”

I wanted to tell him I knew it, but to be honest, I just wasn’t sure. The fear of JJ trying to steal Spencer from me had been real for too long inside my head. Now I just had the confirmation. And though I knew my husband loved me, did he just love me ‘cos JJ wasn’t available? He had a crush on her for so long before we met… and there has always been a fear inside me, an irrational, silly, mind-consuming fear that made me believe JJ’s confession could change everything. 

- “I know it doesn’t mean anything to you, but I don’t feel comfortable around her anymore.”- I whispered and bit my lips ‘cos I really couldn’t handle the emotions I felt at the moment. 

- “Chipmunk…”

- “I feel betrayed and lied to, and now I don’t know how I’m gonna look at her in the face. I don’t wanna be around her anymore. I don’t wanna work at the BAU anymore. And I swear I don’t wanna make it sound like I’m throwing a tantrum.” 

- “You are not, (Y/N). You are not.”- Spencer wrapped his arms around me.- “Let’s go home, please. We don’t have to talk about this anymore. Not now, not today. I just wanna be with our kids at our home.” 

And I wanted to keep myself calm, for Spencer, for our baby, even for the sake of the team. But as soon as I saw JJ heading to the jet, the anger surpassed my logic. 

Jennifer stared at me like a deer in front of a hunter with a firearm pointed straight at her heart. She knew it. I didn’t have to tell her, I could feel all of her guilt and embarrassment. But that wasn’t enough. No. She needed to know how badly she had fucked up.

- “(Y/N), listen…”- she started apologizing as I walked to her, Spencer following close every and each of my movements. 

- “What the fuck is your problem?”- I yelled at her face and pushed her once, forcing her to take a few steps back.- “You just tell my husband you are in love with him and you think I am not going to do anything?!”- I pushed her one more time and kept walking forward as she took a few more steps back. 

- “It’s not like that… I… I was trying to protect us.”- JJ argued, stuttering and looking embarrassed about her feelings, but never denying them. 

- “Oh! Thank you so much!”- I answered with the most sarcastic tone of voice possible.- “I didn’t get the memo when one of your friends confesses their undying love for your husband, you should thank them! Thank you for protecting us!!” 

- “It was the only thing I could come up with….”- she started explaining the unexplainable. 

- “You didn’t come up with anything, Jeniffer!”- I yelled as tears of anger threatened to fall from my eyes.- "If you had made up something you could have said you didn't love your husband anymore! Or is that one true?"

I made a pause and stared at JJ. Her eyes were watered up as she looked down at her shoes.

- "You could have said anything! But you confessed your love for Spencer, and you can't convince me you were lying!"

Spencer stood next to me and placed an arm around me, trying to keep me from jumping and breaking JJ’s face. Which was, in fact, my plan at that minute. It had been years of trying to convince myself I was being paranoid every time JJ stared at Spencer in a way I knew wasn't friendly. The longing, the calls, the text, the weird possessive attitude she had sometimes.

- “(Y/N), please… this is not good for the baby.”- my husband whispered, trying to calm me down. 

- “This is not good for anyone, Spencer!”- I regretted yelling at him, but I was too upset to control myself.- “She could have said anything! Anything else! Any other morbid secret! Bring up her sister’s death, her time in the CIA, shit! Maybe even how bad she felt about helping Hotch pretend Emily’s dead! But she decided to drop this bomb! What do you want me to say? How do you want me to act?”

I was in tears at that point, and the anger wasn’t subsiding. If anything, it was worse because having JJ there in front of me, crying as well, made me realize I was never going to forgive her. Our friendship was ruined after that day, and there was nothing anyone could do to fix it. 

- “I swear, (Y/N), I didn’t mean to hurt you. I… I didn’t know you were listening.”- she sobbed and covered her face with both hands. 

- “We all heard you, JJ! And you know what makes it worse? That I knew it! Deep inside, I knew this shit was real! You showed your true feelings for my husband so many times during the last couple of years, I had to constantly tell myself this shit was just in my head! But it wasn’t! You just confirmed it!”

My yells alerted the team, and soon Rossi and Emily were there to calm the situation.

- “(Y/N), you have to understand, I would never do…”- I cut JJ’s speech as she continued sobbing. I made an effort to put myself together as I stood in front of her and looked her in the eyes in anger.  

- “You would never do what? Try to steal my husband? Because that’s exactly what you just did!”

- “I would never do anything like that!”- JJ yelled in tears, looking incredibly offended by my words. Good. It’s what I was going for.

- “I don’t believe you, Jennifer. You lost my trust and won it back once. But not this time. Our friendship is over. If it depended on me, I would never have to see you again. Not me, not my family. And before you start whining that I’m trying to hurt you, no. I am not trying to hurt you, ‘cos if I wanted to do something like that, I would be on the phone with your poor husband right now, telling him the kind of wife he has. ”

JJ widened her eyes at my words, shocked and frozen in fear.

- “You wouldn't dare”- she whispered, scared.

- “Didn’t you just lose enough in a truth or dare game, Jennifer? Don’t push me.”- my voice was filled with more than anger and deception. There was hate in it. I loathed the woman in front of me, pretending she cared for the mess she had created. 

- “(Y/N), JJ, please. Stop.”- Emily commanded.- “We are all grown-ups here, we need to put this aside. We have to go back home, we have a wedding tomorrow. We are a team.” 

- “Are we still, Em? Really?”- I turned to my unit chief and whipped off my tears. Spencer held me and led me to the jet. Rossi followed us closely, in silence. I had to bite my lower lip to stop crying. I didn’t want to shed another tear for JJ ever again.  

- “Come on, chipmunk. Let’s go home.”- Spencer whispered and held me closer.  

It was the longest five-hour trip of my life. I couldn’t sleep. Neither could Spencer. He wrapped his arm around me the entire time and just held me close. JJ sat on the other side of the plane, on her own. I tried not to look at her ‘cos I didn’t trust myself after what had happened earlier. Only one thing could happen if I did: I was gonna break her face. 

And I was scared. Terrified to even think of what that confession was doing to Spencer. He said it didn’t mean anything to him, but I knew it was obviously killing him, the same way it was killing me. 

Spencer’s point of view 

JJ’s confession couldn’t have come at a worse time. Right after (Y/N)’s second trimester. Every time she has been pregnant, all of her self-doubt comes up after the fifth month. The bigger her belly gets, the more afraid she is. I can understand it, but I will never fully make sense of it. Many studies confirmed that pregnancy hormones can make women feel a mix of highs and lows, which can make them feel more vulnerable or anxious. It was clear that was my wife’s case. I couldn’t tell her that, though. I had commented on the subject back when she was pregnant with Raven, and it made her cry for so long that I regretted it immediately.

But now, things were serious. This was a whole new level of insecurity, and I didn’t want her to think I was even considering leaving her to be with JJ. I would never. 

That night on the plane, while we both pretended to sleep for the sake of the team, I held her close to me and kept her wrapped in my arms and away from JJ, just in case. I remembered a few years before in that very same jet, (Y/N) had faced Seaver after her first case. Each time she stood for what she thought was right, she did it regardless of the consequences of her actions. And consequences were all I could think of. 

For starters, how were we going to deal with Rossi’s wedding? We were invited, we couldn’t miss it. How were we going to stand there next to the rest of the team and celebrate?  

And most importantly, how were we going to deal with the following months? We had agreed to quit after (Y/N)’s maternity leave ended. But I knew JJ was going to get on her nerves, she wasn’t going to live at peace knowing how she felt, and most of all, knowing I had to work with her for twelve more weeks after the baby was born. 

My wife wasn’t going to agree to that. Not in a thousand years. 

We drove in silence all the way from Quantico to our house. I didn't know what to say that might give her peace of mind. Her mom, Sofia, was babysitting the kids that night at our place, so when we got there around three in the morning, everybody was asleep. 

We went straight to bed, I got under the covers and waited for her to get there. As soon as she reached my side, I wrapped my arms around her and held her close to me. 

- “Hey… can you share what’s happening inside your head?”- I whispered and kissed her temple. (Y/N) sighed and met my eyes with concern. 

- “I’m scared.”- her confession was nearly imperceptible, but I heard her underneath the covers.  

- “I told you, what JJ said doesn’t mean anything to me. I love you.”- I explained, trying to be as sweet and understanding as possible.  

- “But… now that you know how she feels…”- she mumbled, fighting the tears.

- “It doesn't change anything, chipmunk. She is my friend, you are the love of my life.” 

- “I don’t want you to regret being with me.”- I had to make a pause before answering those words because it hurt me to think what was happening in her head. 

- “Why would you say something like that?”- it was painful to even consider her thinking I could regret my life with her. My wife moved close to me on our bed and I caressed her cheeks with my thumbs and kept kissing her forehead every once in a while. 

- “I just think… maybe you would have picked her instead of me if you knew how she felt about you.” 

- “Never.”  I didn't hesitate to answer ‘cos I needed her to understand how sure I felt about her. - “I don’t think you understand how much I love you. I’ve loved you since day one. Since the first time I saw you, interviewing for the position with Hotch.” 

- “You were still crushed on JJ when we met.”- she argued and I shook my head. 

- “You don’t understand, chipmunk. I fell for you the first time I talked to you, and since then, you have become the only one for me. You have been the one woman I want to be with ever since we first met. You asked me how old I was and I was so shocked by your presence, Elle had to answer for me.” 

My wife scoffed at my answer, and I reached her lips with mine, trying to soothe her fears with sweet kisses. 

- “Ask anyone…”- I murmured.- “Everybody knows I was a goner after day one.” 

- “Your… mom showed me all the letters you sent her since November 7th, 2005.”- she confessed, embarrassed to tell me their secret.- “Don’t get mad at her. She just… before we got married, she wanted me to know and understand how long you’ve loved me. So she let me read them.” 

- “I’m not mad. I’m glad you did. Can you see how long I’ve loved you?”- I asked her and kissed her lips one more time. 

- “But did you love me ‘cos she wasn’t available? Or…”

- “Chipmunk, I love you ‘cos you are the only one for me. Whatever I thought I felt for JJ back then, was never more than a simple infatuation. The second I met you and started knowing you, you became the only woman for me. You have no competition, nowhere in time or space.” 

My wife hugged and sobbed softly as I held her and ran my fingers through her hair. We stayed like that for a few minutes, until her breathing was calmer and she had stopped crying.  

- “I’m sorry, Spencer.”- she murmured - “I don’t wanna be crazy jealous or anything…” 

- “It’s ok. This is the kind of thing we have to talk about tonight. I know what Jennifer said was out of place, but I don’t want to make it our entire life from now on. I need to close that chapter.” 

- “I need to get out of the BAU.”- my wife replied and sighed.- “Should we set a date for our departure?”

- “If that makes you feel better, I’m in. Let’s set a date.”

- “I don’t think anything will give me any peace of mind right now.” 

- “Twelve weeks after our baby is born, we leave.”- I told her and she sighed one more time. 

- “Twelve weeks. Ok. I can do that.”- she paused and after a few seconds, she simply asked.- “When do we tell Prentiss?” 

- “Let’s give her a month's notice.”- I settled and kissed the top of her head one more time.- “And now, get some sleep, ok? It was a shitty day and you need to rest. The baby needs to rest.” 

- “Thank you, honey. For always taking care of me.”- her words were muffled ‘cos she was hiding on my chest and I just caressed her hair and back slowly, trying to give her all the comfort she needed.  

- “I love you, (Y/N). I am yours, my heart, my soul. Everything I am, it’s yours.”- I murmured and kissed the top of her head one more time.- “Never doubt that.” 

(Y/N)’s point of view 

Rossi’s wedding wasn’t a day at the beach, that I can assure you. Frank took care of the kids that day, so me and Spencer could have some time alone. With Mikey dealing with parenthood and Lu pregnant for the first time, we couldn’t really bother them much. Frank was the best godfather. He was always available to play and take care of our babies. He and Tarah didn’t have kids but still loved Raven and Vinny very much. And they love spending time together. 

I distinctly remember being in our room staring at my reflection in the mirror after I was done getting ready for David’s wedding, thinking I looked like a whale. Spencer walked over with Vincent and stared at me with pure love in his eyes. 

- “Doesn't mommy look gorgeous?”- he asked our baby son and he nodded. I couldn’t blame my husband for trying to make me feel pretty. He knew exactly what was going through my mind that second. 

- “Mommy is pretty”- Vinny replied as I turned to him and kissed his chubby cheeks.

- “You are more pretty! Are you ready to spend time with Uncle Frank and Auntie Tarah?” 

- “Yes! Uncle Funny said he was taking us to the aquarium today!”- Vinny replied, absolutely static with the plan, and Raven showed up holding her backpack. 

- “I’m ready! Let’s go!”- she commanded and grabbed my hand.- “Uncle Frank said if we got there early, we could have a picnic afterward! Come on!”- and just like that, Raven started crawling us downstairs. 

Being with the kids that morning cheered me up and took me back to reality. What really matters and who we were doing everything for: our family. 

- “Ok Nugget”- Frank stood next to our car as Spencer helped Tara with Vinny and Raven kept telling her about her week at school.- “Enjoy the party, don’t drink too much.-”- he joked touching my prominent belly and I just chuckled.

- “Sure thing, Paco. I’ll be the designated driver, so don’t worry.”- I replied and I know the smile didn’t reach my eyes ‘cos he noticed. Frank always noticed those things. 

- “Oh oh, what happened?” 

- “Don’t wanna talk about it now. I gotta look happy for Rossi”

- “Problems with Spencer? Do I have to hurt him?”- I stared at Frank, not moving a facial muscle until he chuckled.- “Fine, so Mr. FBI SSA can break my arm now, but he couldn’t do that when I first met him.”   

- “He is not the problem. He has been amazing” 

- “Then what?”- Frank crossed his arms on his chest as he stared at me, waiting for an answer. And I knew he wasn't going to stop asking until he got one.

- “Mom! Uncle Frank has to go!”- Raven appeared and held his hand, pushing him away from me.- “You can talk with your friend later!”

- “I’ll bring some wine when I drop the kids tonight.-” he decided and started walking with my daughter.

- “I can’t drink, Paco!”- I replied and he smiled evilly. 

- “It’s not for you, Nugget! I'll drink and you'll tell me the whole story.” 

- “So, how are we doing this?”- I asked Spencer as we walked into the venue. Rossi’s wedding was at a beautiful and cozy hotel, and it was only with close friends and family. Not a lot of places to hide. 

- “We have fun with the team, you try not to kill JJ. We go home early and never tell Frank, so we can have some time alone.” 

- “Loving the last part of that plan.”- I felt Spencer’s hand in mine as we took a look around. Matt and his wife were with JJ and Will, so we both moved the opposite way. Garcia and Tara were at the bar, so that's where we headed right away. 

- “Ok, I have just made this up. I call it the Rossi.”- Penelope announced and put a glass on the bar. I turned around as Pen continued talking about her drink, feeling someone’s eyes on me, and JJ quickly turned and looked away as I caught her staring at my husband. Spencer rested his hand on the small of my back and guided my focus back to Garcia. 

- “Will it get me drunk?”- Tara’s question made me chuckle right away.  

- “Totally.”- Garcia replied without hesitations. 

- “Then I will take a double.”- Lewis demanded and turned to her, surprised. 

- “Trying to get drunk before lunch? Bold move.”

- “Someone very wise once said: make every second count. And when there’s an open bar, trust me (Y/N), I always make every second last.”- her answer made me smile wider. 

- “Do you have any mocktails here, Pen?”- I asked and looked at my friend mixing nonalcoholic drinks behind the counter.

- “I have the perfect mix just for you, filled with vitamins for that baby Reid you are growing. Which reminds me, Reid”- she looked at my husband and raised an eyebrow. “ I came to this wedding by myself, but I will not be dancing by myself. Do you understand me, Dr. Reid?” 

- “Yes.”- Spencer replied solemnly and I sipped my glass. I looked at JJ and she was looking over from a distance, again. That was gonna be a long day to deal sober. 

The ceremony was perfect, just what Rossi and Krystal had imagined. But I was awkward the whole time, and I knew Spencer felt the same. He kept his arm or hand on me the entire time. It didn’t get better when it was time for speeches and Emily started talking. 

- “When Dave got engaged, he pulled out all the stops. Some of you might not know this, but he proposed to Krystall in our elevator at the FBI, which was perfect. If she said no, he could just go back to work and she had a built-in escape. But she said yes, and here we are.”

The entire room was listening closely to every word my friend said. Spencer, sitting next to me, held my hand upon the table. 

- “Penelope says that this was fate, that their marriage was in the stars. Dave and Krystall are twin flames, two souls that are always meant to be together. Sometimes it takes time, sometimes it takes a parallel universe or something, but the thing about twin flames is that nothing can keep them apart.”

Spencer moved my hand closer to him and kissed it sweetly. 

- “I would love you in every universe.”- he whispered and I knew I blushed because I felt my cheeks burning. My heart skipped a beat at those words ‘cos I knew he meant them and for once I didn’t care if JJ saw us. Spencer loved me as much as I loved him. 

- “They are a magic unto themselves. And together, they light the way for all of us. To David and Krystall.”- Emily finished her speech and we all raised our glasses. 

The plan was to stay a little longer after lunch and then go home, but Penelope, Matt, and Luke were doing such a great job keeping everybody dancing, we were having a great time. And we deserved that. To enjoy our time with our friends. It felt special considering we now had a date to leave. No more thinking about it. It was a fact. 

Spencer was getting me water and I was resting for a while when I saw JJ approaching him. My stomach dropped when I saw her skinny figure in a tight red dress standing next to my husband. He was gorgeous in that tux. She said a few words, Spencer shook his head, grabbed two bottles of water, smiled and walked away. I stared at the entire scene from my seat, and JJ looked at Spencer walking across the room back to me. 

- “What was that?”

- “She was thanking me for saving her life.”- he replied and sat by my side.

- “And?”

- “And then she started rambling about when I got the ankle holster and how she just said what she said to get that guy’s attention.”- my husband held my hand as he spoke, and stared at my eyes, trying to reassure me he was telling the truth.  

- “Sure…”

- “I told her I didn’t care. That whatever happened, it was in the past. That nothing was gonna change ‘cos things were the way they were supposed to be. And then I left.”

I didn’t reply, I just nodded and stared at him as she finished his explanation. I didn’t want to be the kind of wife who keeps demanding her husband to tell her everything he talked about with other women, but JJ was, and probably will ever be, a sensitive subject between us.  

- “Are you ok?”- I whispered and he nodded, kissing my hand.

- “Are you ok?”- he asked me and I smiled at him, nodding as well.- “Good, ‘cos now we are going home to enjoy the house alone for a while.”

- "That actually sounds like a date."- I replied as he kept holding my hand.

- "Then how about a nice bath for the two of us and some hot chocolate?"

- "Let's get the car."   

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