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miceenscene · 4 years ago

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Hi Mice!

Since you're someone who has written in several fandoms, I have a question for you. (I'm loving your Mandalorian fic, by the way. A soulmate AU is perfect for the lonely tin can cowboy!) I certainly don't feel like I have my finger on the pulse of fandom or anything (I'm pretty much just a lurker), but I've started to notice an uptick in second-person, reader-insert fics lately. (I realize this could have been a super popular trend for ages, and I’m just discovering it, haha.) As someone interested in narrative theory, I find this fascinating. Second person narratives are used very rarely in literature; the only one I can think of off the top of my head is Italo Calvino's wonderful If on a Winter's Night a Traveler.

Have you noticed a similar trend? What do you think might account for it? Is it a convention of particular fandoms, or is this a trend across the board? Is it a kind of natural evolution of Tumblr fics?

I can't decide how I feel about it overall. At its worst, it seems a shameless update on ye olde Mary Sue. But when done well, the reader can be a well-drawn, engaging character, and it can lend an urgency and immediacy to the writing.

I'm totally not expecting you to be an expert here or anything, just thought I'd get thoughts from a writer I respect. Feel free to ignore this, if you’d like! Haha. Hope you're well!

Hey!

This is rather funny that you should ask because I was just talking about second-person fics in a group chat this morning. And so I shared your ask with them and got some additional insights.

I’ve certainly noticed an uptick in the amount of second-person I’m seeing, but I also have just added a much more Vibrant fandom to my collection after living for so long in one that is defined by glories past. The group says that they’ve also noticed an uptick; fandoms like Chris Evans or Hiddleston used to be much more OC focused are now heavily second-person focused instead. It’s certainly easy to see the evidence. The Mando/Reader tag is LEAGUES larger than Mando/OC on both tumblr & Ao3. (Same with the rest of Pedro Pascal’s shippable characters, but you mentioned Mandalorian in particular. :D)

As to why, there could really be any number of reasons.

The group wisely suggested, and I agree, that the COVID lockdowns have a part to play. Everyone everywhere is just fuckin’ desperate for happy brain chemicals. And this fic here is about my current comfort character thinking I’m pretty and wanting to spend time with me. Weeeeeeee. Happy day dreams ahoy.

I think they may also come from a natural progression of Mary Sues/OC’s of the past. A reader-insert certainly cuts out the middle man. Like how fanfic helps streamline the writing process by doing the heavy lifting of world-building and partial character creation, Reader Insert streamlines even more by letting the reader themself also half-fashion the OC in their own head. (Though to be fair, the best reader inserts I’ve ever read have the ‘You’ be very much their own character. So some writers take that labor back from their readers to some truly fantastic results.)

I think also there may be something truly engaging in the semi-communal feeling of a second-person story. Every second-person story has a story-teller. There’s another voice telling you what is happening to ‘You’, another person specifically crafting a scenario for you. And it feels more personal because it’s addressed directly to you, and often highly subjective in nature (the ‘You’s feelings typically being the key reasoning for writing in the first place). This goes back to the Covid point but with Covid and even capitalism doing its damnedest to continually separate people (because we are so much easier to market to when we’re alone), it’s not surprising that the older forms of seeking community through storytelling are getting a renaissance. Dungeons & Dragons (and tabletop roleplaying) is a really great example of second-person storytelling that has exploded in recent years. Humans have always liked telling stories (our brains even tell us stories when we sleep). Just its no longer happening around a fire after a meal, but through my phone in the middle of the night, curled up in my bed.

Though even in published fiction, we may not see ‘You’ as a character but we do see characters crafted specifically for audience projection. Both in media like Doctor Who where you have the Audience Insert Companion that’s there to ask the questions about the weird bullshit that’s happening that the audience themselves might be having (and also to make googoo eyes at the Doctor to varying levels of success); or in stories like Twilight where Bella has far more in common with a ‘You’ than she does say Elizabeth Bennet. (Bella’s even managed to get the first person POV while still being a highly projectable outline of a character. She’s essentially one pronoun away from being a ‘You’. YA as a whole genre makes a lot of money off this exact concept. Tumblr and Ao3 just take it the next step forward.)

The key to a good story is engaging your reader. Second-person seems be a new trend to doing that. But if the last decade has taught us anything it’s that things that start online rarely ever stay there. Traditional Publishing moves slow so I don’t think we’ll be seeing Simon & Schuster promoting any second-person novels anytime soon. But it wouldn’t surprise me if there are smaller boutique publishers already making them and people already buying them.

You said that you didn’t know how you felt about Second-person overall. And I don’t think that’s an incorrect place to be. Second-person is just a tool, like a paintbrush is a tool or a rolling pin is a tool. In the hands of a novice, it can leave something to be desired. And in the hands of a good craftsman, it can be used to create something truly astounding.

(However, all this to say, the use of ‘y/n’ (or any of its derivatives) will always be a big Nope for me. I’ve read enough second person to have it patently proven that it’s possible to write without it.)

<3, Mice

#joanofsnark712 #second person #x reader #this turned into quite the dissertation huh? :D #I've yet to actually write any second person partially because i can't get my brain to not push the You way past a projectable state #I like the lil details of character building too much #'no no you don't understand. it's very important that she has a cajun accent. for... reasons.'#tho really any character is projectable if you try hard enough #my fav projector for years has been a 7 foot tall raptor so like anything can be anything

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mxadrian779 · 5 years ago

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How Not to Be an Ableist Dick.

Lame is ableist. Deal with it.

Disability metaphors abound in our culture, and they exist almost entirely as pejoratives. You see something wrong? Compare it to a disabled body or mind: Paralyzed. Lame. Crippled. Schizophrenic. Diseased. Sick. Want to launch an insult? The words are seemingly endless: Deaf. Dumb. Blind. Idiot. Moron. Imbecile. Crazy. Insane. Retard. Lunatic. Psycho. Spaz.

Lame is fucking ableist

New meanings aren’t random

At the same time, much media attention has been paid to the use of slurs such as retarded. Similarly, the stigma associated with psychiatric disabilities has left its mark on many words, rendering them insults, such as crazy and insane.

So why isn’t more attention being paid to words like lame?

In the case of physical disability, once-neutral lame now describes someone who is “inept, naive, easily fooled; spec. unskilled in the fashionable behavior of a particular group, socially inept.”

Those who use these expressions tend to try to justify their use in one of two ways.

First, disability is (in their view) actually a bad thing. As one blogger explained:

It’s not okay to call a coward a pussy, or a bad thing gay, they argue, because there’s nothing bad about having a vagina or being homosexual. But there IS something bad about not being mobile! In fact, it’s no fun at all, just totally miserable. All other things held equal, isn’t it better to be not-lame than lame?

(It goes without saying that many people with disabilities would object to having their identity hijacked as the automatic stand-in for all things bad.)

Second, it can be argued – and with some legitimacy – that some of these terms no longer generally refer to disability. Languages change. New meanings emerge from old ones.

But that’s the point: new meanings are not random. Having undergone a process linguists call semantic bleaching, lame has lost some elements of its meaning over time. While physical impairment is no longer part of its (new) meaning, my study of its use in Time Magazine since 1923 showed that it has retained the social meanings associated with disability in the 20th century: awkwardness, stupidity, femininity, lack of social graces and sophistication, and more.

Lame is fucking ableist

Everyday terminology can insult a group of people, even unintentionally. Calling someone a “schizoid,” and expressions like “that’s crazy” and “the last Avengers movie was insane” can be considered offensive to people with mental disabilities. Saying someone is a “basketball junkie” diminishes the seriousness of addiction.

What about saying “that movie was really lame”? A limping horse can be called “lame,” in the sense that it has an injury. But because “lame” can also mean “weak,” “inferior,” or “contemptible,” among Merriam-Webster’s definitions, it’s best avoided in reference to a person or their actions.

An excellent source for disability terminology is the style guide from the National Center on Disability and Journalism, which gives background, Associated Press style guidelines, and advice for its entries.

Lame is fucking ableist

Disability metaphors are abound in our culture, and they exist almost entirely as pejoratives. As Rachel Cohen-Rottenberg wrote on DisabilityandRepresentation.com, “If a culture’s language is full of pejorative metaphors about a group of people, that culture is not going to see those people as fully entitled to the same inclusion as people in a more favored group.” This handout’sprimary purpose is to serve as a reference for linguistic microaggressions and everyday, casual ableism.

Lame is fucking ableist

Why is it so difficult to see that using these words as pejoratives is just as problematic as the once-popular put-down “That’s so gay”?

Despite the reality that nearly one in five Americans has a disability, the fight to extend human dignity to people with disabilities seems an uphill battle. We live in a culture that systematically devalues individuals with disabilities. This group is disproportionately subject to discrimination, underrepresentation and criminal violation. And while these issues may seem far more significant than the problems of labels and slurs, the common language of ableism contributes to a state in which the dehumanization of people with disabilities is culturally acceptable.

Lame is fucking ableist

Lame is a common enough term that even the most “woke” websites and bloggers will use it in their regular language, articles, and posts. Every single time I see it in print or hear it thrown out in casual conversation, my stomach turns a bit. These are people who I know are otherwise politically aware, culturally sensitive, and careful with their word choice. They would never use a racist or homophobic epithet, so why do ableist words seem to get a pass?

First a quick primer on ableism: as racism is to race, ableism is discrimination against disabled people, in favor of able-bodied people. This can take the form of lack of equal opportunities, inaccessibility, word choice, bias, prejudice, and more. Ableism is stairs with no ramps, it is construction crews and delivery vans parking sideways across blue spaces, it is healthcare companies refusing to cover those with pre-existing conditions, and it is calling someone or something you don’t like “lame.”

To be completely clear, lame is a slur. There are countless others out there, but this word in particular seems to be forgiven or forgotten more than any others.

The primary dictionary definition is “having a body part and especially a limb so disabled as to impair freedom of movement.” A few definitions down, it’s defined as slang for “square, inferior, or contemptible.” Originally, this first definition was the only one. Society eventually moved on to other problematic terms such as “handicapped,” but only once “lame” started to colloquially be used to describe anything negative.

Lame is fucking ableist

While only trolls would use a word like ‘retard’, concern with ableist language extends much more widely. There was a time when lots of educated people, with no intent to offend, used words we now regard as sexist, like ‘mankind’ or the male pronoun as a universal. Some of those who used this sexist language were actually supportive of gender equality, and failed to see any connection between their words and reinforcing gender hierarchy. Today, this attitude is much less common. Those concerned with ableist language claim the cases are closely analogous: many of us unthinkingly use words that are ableist without recognizing that fact. They want to alert us to our ableism and have us change our linguistic usage.

For instance, they claim that phrases like “turn a deaf ear to” associate deafness with ignorance; that to call someone or something “lame” metaphorically is to associate walking difficulties with an unrelated (perceived) defect that reduces value; that to describe someone who acts unthinkingly as “dumb” is to inappropriately associate communication difficulties with mere foolishness.

Lame is fucking ableist

We don’t say the r-word anymore. But have you heard someone say one of these recently?

“He’s so crazy.”

“The weather is schizophrenic.”

“Our workload is insane.”

“That’s lame.”

I have, and I’m trying to stop. All the phrases use ableist language.

Ableism is the discrimination of people with disabilities. Ableist language is prejudiced words or phrases against people with disabilities. Disabilities can range from visible to invisible; similarly, ableist language can seem invisible to us (until we start paying attention to our words!) because the phrases are so ingrained in our cultural lexicon.

Lame is fucking ableist

Lame Refers to people with physical or mobility disabilities. Often used as a metaphor. Consider instead: Boring, uninteresting, monotonous, lacks excitement, uncool, out of fashion (if using metaphors); physically disabled person, person with a mobility impairment, paralyzed person (if referring to a disabled person)

Lame is fucking ableist

In the same way that a stranger should not appropriate your body for his commentary, you should not appropriate my disabled body — which is, after all, mine and not yours — for your political writing or social commentary.

A disabled body should not appear in articles about how lame that sexist movie is or how insane racism is. A disabled body should be no more available for commentary than a nondisabled one.

The core problem with using a body as a metaphor is that people actually live in bodies. We are not just paralyzed legs, or deaf ears, or blind eyes.

When we become reduced to our disabilities, others very quickly forget that there are people involved here. We are no longer seen as whole, living, breathing human beings.

Our bodies have simply been put into the service of your cause without our permission.

Lame is fucking ableist

If one of these 12 words is still in your vocabulary, it's time to reframe, rethink and reimagine your word choices.

1. "Lame"

If you're still using the word "lame," you might want to give your internal dictionary a serious update.

"Lame" was originally used in reference to people with reduced mobility due to physical disability. The word is now tossed around schoolyards and workplaces everywhere to mean "uncool" and "unappealing." Even singer-songwriter Ellie Goulding recently included the word in an activist-oriented tweet addressing misogyny in song lyrics.

For a lot of us, "lame" doesn't have that same bad-word sting many offensive terms have. But that definitely doesn't mean it's OK to use. Disability rights activists have long called for the word to phase out. We have a responsibility to respect that.

Lame is fucking ableist

Then it clicked for me. Whether or not I saw any important difference in my use of language, it was having real effects on other people, effects I might not understand. And if that was the case, which my colleague was saying it was, why not make the small change in my language that would matter quite a lot to people around me? It’s so easy. It goes a long way. It doesn’t cost me a thing, but it makes a big difference in the lives of others.

The same is true for ableist language. ‘Lame’, ‘crazy’, ‘dumb’, ‘schizo’, ‘deaf’. We throw around a lot of words whose primary purpose is to describe a mental or physiological condition. Often without thinking, we’re supporting damaging stereotypes about disabilities. But we can change this kind of language, and once we learn to catch it, it’s so easy to do.

...

We need to reframe conversations about marginalizing language to consider the actual damage it causes. Using a word like ‘lame’ as a disparaging catch-all (which, full disclosure, is a habit I’m still working to change) means that actual lameness—the inability to walk—registers as less than non-lameness, the ability to walk. It pushes people who can’t walk into the margins of what’s considered normal and good.

Lame is fucking ableist

Besides being hurtful and harmful to people who have disabilities, the use of these filler words also decreases the effectiveness of our communication. We stop using the wide variety of words in the English language that communicate precise meanings and, likewise, understand things less precisely. Consider, for example, the difference between saying, “He’s crazy!” versus saying, “He acts in outrageous and unpredictable ways!” Or instead of saying, “That movie was lame,” explaining, “That movie was unoriginal and unenjoyable.” In truth, the world is a more exciting place when we are thinking precisely about what we actually mean, and can communicate our precise meanings to other people. And when we do, we demonstrate love and respect for our fellow human beings.

Lame is fucking ableist

What we sometimes say: “That is so lame!”

Being lame does not mean uncool. Being lame means you are physically impaired from using your legs, yet even within this context it is still an offensive and outdated term.

If a person who has use of their legs, they should not be using a word describing a physical inhibition to describe something they are not a fan of.

What we actually mean, and what we should say: Uncool, cheesy, tacky, corny.

Lame is fucking ableist

Ableist language is any word or phrase that intentionally or inadvertently targets an individual with a disability.For the most part, these words are filler, nothing more. Examples of ableist language include “crazy,” “insane,” “lame,” “dumb,” “retarded,” “blind,” “deaf,” “idiot,” “imbecile,” “invalid (noun),” “maniac,” “nuts,” “psycho,” “spaz.”

Each of these words, when used flippantly, can be extremely insulting to individuals who find themselves with physical (“lame,” “invalid,” “dumb”) or mental (“crazy,” “retarded,” “psycho”) disabilities. A full explanation of why these words are so problematic, along with alternatives that can be used can be found over at Autistic Hoya.

Lame is fucking ableist

Words like as “crazy," "lame," and "retarded," instead of “ridiculous," "pointless," and a thesaurus-full of others, stigmatizes people with disabilities. What's more, such language is often used to deride other marginalized groups.

“[H]ow the world is wired… may be invisible to those who do not have disabilities,” read the Web site for Stop Ableism Inc., a disability rights organization in Guelph, Ontario. Unless you are one of the roughly 56.7 million, or one in five, Americans who have disabilities, or know someone with a disability, you’re less likely to notice the “physical, attitudinal, or systemic” discrimination built into everyday life. Unawareness of ableism is everywhere, said Lydia Brown, a student, writer, and autism activist.

“There is a power structure that non-disabled people can ignore as a result of their privilege as able-bodied and neurotypical,” Brown told Campus Progress, “but which we as disabled people must confront for every moment of our existences.”

Lame is fucking ableist

Because it has been normalised to such an extent, most people using ableist language do so without being aware of the implication behind their words. Subtle insults, directed at minority groups, may seem harmless at first glance but such microaggressions, when accumulated over a lifetime, result in lower self-confidence, depression and higher mortality. Thus, language too can become a medium of oppression. Let’s take a look at the meaning behind certain words which are most definitely ableist but are very much part of everyday conversation.

“That joke was so lame!”

This is a commonly heard phrase. In fact, there are entire websites dedicated to ‘lame’ jokes. ‘Lame’ was originally used to refer to people unable to walk due to physical disability or neurological disorders affecting their feet. In modern day parlance, it has come to mean unoriginal, uninteresting or dull. Next time you use the word ‘lame’ to describe a film or a song, bear in mind that you are equating people who have to rely on canes or crutches with all those negative meanings.

Alternatives: Unimpressive, Boring, Tedious, Uninspiring, Tiresome, Lacklustre, Meh

Lame is fucking ableist

To understand ableism, it is imperative to recognize how society is structured to favor able people. Able privilege encompasses accessibility, language choice, low expectations, microaggressions, and lack of knowledge. All of these aspects are a part of everyday life. Everyday language like “lame”, “insane”, and “idiot” have roots in medicine and a history of discriminatory use about people with disabilities. This builds on the assumption that disability is a detriment. The language we use towards and about disabled individuals (e.g. “wheelchair bound” and “special ed’) disregards their autonomy.

Lame is fucking ableist

They spoke about ableist language and the way that influences, both consciously and subconsciously, people’s view of those with disabilities and what they are capable of doing. For those not familiar, ableist language is when a term that is associated with people with disabilities – things like the R-word, “lame,” or “crazy” – take on a negative and belittling meaning.

Lame is fucking ableist

2. "That's Lame."

Although "lame" is often used to disparage something these days, its original definition refers to the inability to walk. When you say something is lame, you equate lameness with negativity.

Lame is fucking ableist

The use of the words lame, gimp, or retarded reinforces an underlying assumption that people who have a disability are also lesser and worthy of scorn, which in turn reinforces the underlying assumption that people with disabilities are inherently less than those without disabilities.

Lame is fucking ableist.

Unintended ableism

Just as language is gendered, it can also be ableist. Ableism is simply the discrimination against anyone with a physical or mental disability. And our everyday, casual speak can unfortunately be ableist, reinforcing insensitivity and negative stereotypes.

Words like “blind”, “deaf,” “dumb,” “idiot,” “insane,” “lame,” “nuts,” and “psycho” are all ableist.

Instead of using words like these, take this opportunity to practice clearer communication. Instead of saying, “My manager is nuts if she thinks we’re going to meet that deadline,” you can say: “This deadline is unrealistic.”

Saying what you mean can prevent the use of offensive shortcuts. For some inspiration, check out the work of some great disability activists.

Lame is fucking ableist.

When you insist on using words like “crazy” or “lame” in your speech — or worse, when brands use these words in their marketing copy, which is subject to several layers of internal review — you effectively draw a straight line between people’s physical conditions or mental health issues, and that which is unfortunate and undesirable.

Lame is fucking ableist.

Don’t be an ableist dick.

#people of disability #people with disabilities #dear abled people #ableist #ableism #slur #lame #the l word #disabilities #disability #abled privilege #ableist language #retarded #bad language

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not-just-any-fangirl · 6 years ago

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Hey i know it's been a while but do you have any more deaf au headcanons? I've been thinking about it recently💖💖💖

Anon said: Just found your deaf natsu au and I'm in love?? bless you for sharing your writing

Awwwww thank you guys!! I’m like super behind on... everything. Everything fandom or writing wise i am. Not doing.

But!!! I will force myself to do the things I love! Like talking about deaf!Natsu au.

First of all: Levy

idk if I’ve stated this somewhere yet or not, but Levy is a Shi’a Muslim and a trans woman. I think I’ve said the second part before but?? Its been so goddamn long lmaooo

She doesn’t drink, smoke, and observes the dietary restrictions in Islam, but dresses more secular

She does have an entire drawer dedicated to scarfs with pretty colours or patterns

She wears a hijab mainly only during holidays/mosque

Observes prayer five times a day

She goes to a queer friendly mosque that her mother found for her on campus, and Jet and Droy are youth group leaders there, as the university city/campus is in the middle of a large suburb, fondly called Magnolia bcus of the flowers that come up in the spring

Levy is studying for a double master in linguistics and ancient languages, with a side focus on cultural anthropology

Everyone is v concerned about how she has time to breathe, never mind actually hang out with them or have a life

Gajeel is straight up in awe of her

he kinda loves her already

especially how short she is and how easy she is to piss off via commenting about how short she is

She praises Allah at. Everything. It’s only a little in hyperbole too, but she was raised in a family that was v secure in their faith and involved in their community

Her father died when she was young, but her mother remarried when she was about 7 to a trans woman, which is how Levy realized she wasn’t alone and was in fact a girl

She has been met with nothing but love and support by her community growing up, even if there was some process in some of the members understanding

Anyway

Only good things for my blue haired nerd daughter

Levy loves spice the same way Gray does which is to say: Not

She is however addicted to sugar

You know how people put sugar on like shreddies or plain cereal? Levy does that to fruit loops

Loke and Juvia are the most horrified of the group, but only barely

Natsu and Levy bond over their love of Lucy

Levy has stated that if she weren’t so swamped with studies and already in love with languages, she would be challenging Natsu to a fight for Lucy’s honour.

Natsu’s only have kidding when he says to meet him in the pit

This may have also caused some of the friction between Gajeel and Lucy at first as Lucy was 100% Natsu’s cousin wanted to kill her and she had no idea why

Natsu and Levy also bond about being the darkest in their immediate friendgroup, and share Looks with each other in times of need

Ie the ‘traditional’ Indian restaurant fiasco mentioned before

Levy was the only one fluent in ASL and ISL before meeting Natsu

Loke: Was a pen pal of Lucy’s when she was a child, and convinced her to send an application to Fairy Tail

Laxus already went here but was slightly estranged from Lucy and his entire family during the last years of Lucy’s highschool career

Lucy helped him patch up his relationship to Makarov to the strength that it is now

Loke is non-binary with a preference for they/them pronouns, but some days prefer he/him, other days she/her, but most of the time they/them

They’re dating Aries, but are polya

Aries is a trans woman as well, and the two and Levy have a group chat titled with the blue, pink, and white heart emojies

They just send each other memes or bitch about the cis on really rough days

Loke is actually v private about their home life or their inner thoughts

Lucy and Gray are the only ones they really open up to in the friend group

Loke was Gray’s first non-girl kiss and set him down the long road of ‘oh fuck I’m not straight’

Gray and Loke still hooked up on and off before he got into a relationship with Juvia

Aries and Gray are surprisingly close friends considering the whole Loke thing, and while Loke is happy they are also Concerned about what those two fiends are talking about

It’s art

They’re talking about ancient art

Not everything's about you Loke damn

They also talk about how cute Loke is after an orgasm but shhh they don’t need to know that

Loke loves that they’re included in both boys nights and girls nights

All the gossip plz

All the drama

Is the best secret keeper

There are like. 50. groupchats amoungst their friendgroup, and that’s not even including all the peripheral groups like clubs and sports teams or family

Its such a hot mess

Just constant updates from everywhere

Natsu puts his phone on completely silent otherwise it’d basically work as a vibrator with how often it buzzes

Lucy snorted milk out her nose when Natsu first told her that, and couldn’t even yell at him for laughing bcus he was rolling on the floor with his eyes closed in hysterics

Cana and Mira have it on video

They sent it to every group chat they were in

Natsu has a slight Indian or Japanese accent depending on which words bcus his main teachers were Igneel or Grandeeny growing up, and their mouth movements is what he learned, including their accents

Mira, Lissana, and Lucy speak French together to talk shit about weird boys in public

Juvia and Levy love dying each others hair different shades of blue or trying out new product

Gajeel and Erza can make anyone piss their pants when they stand next to each other bcus the pure aura of Intimidation can reap your soul

Erza deemed herself the Mom Friend, but everyone knows she’s more like the wine aunt who likes to hunt boar with her bare hands sometimes

She’s an enigma wrapped in a mystery wrapped in ancient Korean armour Erza where did you find that and how did you get in it it’s from the Three Kingdom period ???

Levy, Erza, and Natsu bond over warrior ages in ancient cultures

Lissana is allergic to mint but carries an epi-pen bcus not even God herself can stop Lisanna from getting her hands on mint chocolate chip ice cream

Cana Respects it, Gray is Concerned, and Natsu just gives her a high five as he eats a cheeseburger

During exam weeks group study sessions turn into cuddle piles of despair

Natsu gets tired of reading lips sometimes and will straight up be the first thing he tells his friends when he sees them

Gray, Juvia, Lucy, and Lissana can kind of tell without him having to sign it

Gajeel just texts him mostly despite being exceptionally fluent in ASL and conversational in ISL

Cobra will explicitly speak to him, but knows when to push Natsu and when not to

Mostly

Lucy needs glasses for reading if she's been on the computer/head in a book too long and the first time Natsu saw them was after they started dating and then Lucy wasn’t studying the rest of the night

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experiencespanishlanguage-blog · 5 years ago

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If you actually have done a number of study on different lessons along with have a shortlist... it is advisable to cut lose all individuals which are not aimed at instructing you audio Spanish while a priority.

This is simply not to be able to say that learning sentence structure isn't important, but lots of people get weighed down learning and memorize grammar regulations that they lose look associated with why they wished to understand Spanish throughout the first place; often the satisfaction that being ready to speak in addition to know Spanish can bring.

You may enjoy learning Spanish very much better and turn into much considerably more successful at the idea in the event that you are able for you to put some sentences jointly within a 7 days instead than being able to help successfully remember the everlasting article, issue pronouns as well as whatever else an few days of grammar analysis carries out at you.

Once a person are installed and operating and conversing Spanish with assurance, grammar can become much easier in order to discover and it will probably just be a event regarding tweaking what an individual already know.

some. Posting Notes on EVERYTHING!

Appears funny I know, yet get yourself a wedge of post-its and remain them everywhere in your personal home with the Spanish language expression for that thing written in it (with the actual exception within your spouse, young children and house animals, although tortoises are fine! ).

A person will be amazed with how fast you will decide on up the vocabulary regarding everyday objects... 'Everyday' becoming the important word below. Therefore i'm never surprised just about any longer with the vocabulary this Spanish training ask starters to learn... Come on, man, precisely how many of us are generally going to utilize terms bullfighting or clod with everyday conversation!

your five. Beat in to Spanish TELEVISION and Radio:

Watching Speaking spanish speaking TV or enjoying Spanish radio stations will certainly help you obtain a sense for spoken The spanish language seeing that well as keeping anyone updated with subjects which Romance language speaking people could possibly be discussing.

Television would likely be better currently much easier to understand what is definitely being explained if you actually have accompanying pictures.

For anyone who is busy around the property you could often choose a method of studying I love to call 'subliminal Spanish'. Switch the TV as well as radio upon a Spanish language speaking networking, turn upwards the volume, and in that case connect with your chores. Right now there is no need to have any attention to just what is getting said.

Around time you will commence to pick out certain words and phrases without concentrating as nicely as becoming employed to reading how Spanish is actually spoke.

It is a fine idea first of all news variety programs initial as the particular pronunciation is usually any great deal clearer and simple to comprehend. Nonetheless sport is not really a good choice for the reason that commentators do tend to be able to get yourself a little excited and also chat very quickly, though it is satisfying for you to listen to!

6. Help make Your Individual Flashcards:

My spouse and i would suggest that a person generate flashcards to support you learn language, somewhat than buying them. I would recommend this for three motives:

Precisely why spend unnecessarily any time it's simple cheaper to help make them oneself! An individual are able to make cards applying words that will are most useful for your requirements The process of truly making them will assist you to recall them, in fact a lot of the cards you make may well be well not required ahead of you even use all of them!

8. Become Involved within your Local Speaking spanish Group:

For those of an individual that live alongside, or even within, a The spanish language discussing neighborhood, try to mixture as much as feasible into their social pursuits, use the local Romance language talking supermarkets or day-to-day, interact in with your Spanish language speaking friends and neighbors whenever achievable.

Not only will this kind of benefit your studies however, you will receive a whole lot of help along with reassurance as well as generating brand-new Spanish speaking pals.

6. Use Online Solutions:

If you don't get some sort of Spanish neighborhood shut to you, otherwise you can not receive Spanish TV SET or perhaps radio networks, then this up coming best thing is in order to utilize internet. There usually are many resources for instance chat-rooms, open forums, pod-casts in addition to PCTV networks which might be most easily accessible online as well as could all be employed to practice your own Speaking spanish... so get browsing on and also use them!

9. Work with a Spanish Verb Trainer:

Becoming fluent in spanish verbs is probably typically the most difficult section of understanding Spanish and also 1 of the most significant. Using a verb dog trainer that will help do this much more efficiently is a smart choice. If there is one particular area that is generally overlooked by many scholars it is the appropriate use of verbs. Verbs are important as these people be the better choice of your essay sentences and in The spanish language they will are doubly important because additionally, they indicate who will be performing often the action.

Typically the best way to find out a new verb quickly along with properly is to employ a verb conjugator or maybe a verb conjugation exercise program. A good verb teaching program will assist you to select the actual verb you want to be able to study and in either tense you decide and after that provide the drills to practice you. The aim is usually to help make learning Romance language easier and a action-word conjugation trainer will accomplish in which.

10. Total Concentration:

In the event that money and time period are not a difficulty for yourself, then the ideal way to learn Spanish language is to invest inside a total saut study course located in a Speaking spanish speaking country.

Not merely can you learn the community language however you will likewise be immersed into the particular traditions and customs involving your website hosts as properly as the local technique of life. Captivation programs are not as pricey as they once were being but, will still be beyond typically the reach of countless.

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barelynakedthoughts · 4 years ago

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Wow, the past few days have been unreal. I last updated on Thursday in the morning soon after they had started pumping in pitocin. From 12pm, May 12th, until 5 am, May 14th, I was dealing with contractions. 41 hours of early labor and it only led to being dilated by 4cm.

I used a fitness orb, a fitness peanut, slow dancing, varying leg positions. Nothing pushed me into active labor. They kept saying to make it to 6cm and we'll be in the home stretch. The contractions got so strong throughout the day, too. I didn't want an epidural because I didn't want to do it so early. If the beginning took this long, can the ending really be that short? I wanted the baby in my arms but I knew he wasn't ready so I waited for him to give me a sign. (Note we can freely say pronouns now)

I believe at 10am on May 13th, they broke my water because I had made it to 4cm. It felt like things were moving so nicely! The doctor who came in at 6 am wa snot very comforting -made me cry. She gave me minimal answers and her visit was brief. Had I obtained the knowledge of inductions and labor that I have now, I would have been okay, but it was all so new to me and she was very curt after working her 24 hour shift. I wish she would do people favors and just not do those shifts. It would give her a better bedside manner. She basically gave me my first crying spell and I felt so desperate for four hours.

A new doctor came in soon after that. She reminded me of General Holdo from Star Wars, except I have no clue if she had purple-ish hair. Though Jackie, the nurse who talked a lot, had purple-ish hair. I could see it sticking out through her hair cap thing. Our room was always dark so I didn't really see much going on. Anyways, they broke my water and the contractions quickly turned into pain, pain and more pain. Not cramping pain, but pain nonetheless. I was on 2-30 levels of pitocin (whatever that means), and when the water broke, I was contracting every 1-2 minutes for hours on end. I breathed through all of them, dealt with the pain and kept my mind on the goal.

-----

I was thankful for the nurse we had the night before they broke my water, Shawna, because she knew how to just be there for me. When the new nurse came in after that terrible doctor visit, I wasn't all too thrilled cuz she talked a lot and overexplained things, but she at least made it very apparent that she cared. Shawna came back later in the evening, but she wasn't my nurse. She just knew that I liked her and she just wanted to help. It was a relief to have her there for a little bits she came in on.

-----

May 13th was like one last date day between Ryan and I. Besides the constant pain and regular contraction pauses, he and I just talked, hugged, watched Falcon and Winter Soldier, cried, laughed, and appreciated the other one being there. We barely got any rest. Though Ry was able to get a bit more than me, but not much. It was honestly a blurry of a day for me since I spent most of staring at focal points (the red light from the TV being turned off or Ryan's eyes or the up button for the bed or even this white piece on a red container on the baby's soon-to-be panda warmer). Im trying to write as much down as possible, but I know I'll miss a few things.

-----

As the day progressed, my energy level dropped substantially. I gave up my fitness orb life and I embraced bedrest for the first time in the pregnancy. Going to the bathroom was difficult and I was constipated. Stupid magical hemorrhoids that appeared two days before going in the hospital.

Those pesky IV issues got worse. As my pain increased, I had to deal with a 5 IVs. After the one in my elbow went off sixty thousand times, the nurse finally called the anesthesiology team to try another spot but with a deeper vein. She found it with an ultrasound, which was neat, and she had to really numb my arm to get it in there. It was the best IV, though. It really stuck in there and I only had minimal issues with the IV tower. Thank goodness because I was at my wits end at that point. Though Jackie ended up finish the IV and reconnecting my pitocin and fluid drips...she taped the IV to my hospital bracelet. So when anyone tried to scan it, I had to twist my arm painfully.

The one time, the food people came. I twisted my arm to have them read it, and they didn't even scan it....but we'll the damage was done. I had accidentally disconnected everything. The IV started gushing blood like a fountain and I just sat on my fitness orb with nothing much to do but hope it stopped soon...or that someone would come in. My husband actually had to go get someone because there was blood everywhere. All the while, I was contracting every 3 minutes at that point. So a fountain of blood just pushing out while squeezed my own legs. What a trip! The final IV sat in my arm up until May 15th...it was annoying to breastfeed with it in. I had to finish my toradol pain meds before it could come out.

-----

As the day went on, I kept contracting but nothing changed...at 10pm, they finally told us our options: more of the same or having a c-section. We were looking at a failed induction if we didn't progress to 6 cm by 5am, May 14th. At the point, it would have been 18 hours post my water being broke and the chance of infection would then steadily increase. I didn't take the news well and I cried. My night time doctor, who I had seen in the office and who is actually a midwife, was the one who broke the news. She tried to say it was natural to feel sad about this, but honestly...nothing was going to console me after here the word "failure".

Just like my sister, the pitocin failed. Before they officially said it failed, they did a pit rest (a 1-2 hour pitocin break) and then started the process at 2 levels again. We made it up to 10 levels before they called it at 430am. My cervix stopped at 4cm and there was no changing it. Though at that time, I had finally accepted the c-section. It was the right choice and it meant getting to see our baby sooner. We just needed to pray again for safety, healing and life...plus tell our families that I was having a c-section. They were wondering where we went for so long because I just cried for a while and asked that my husband not share anything until we were ready.

-----

The surgery was interesting. I wasn't really contracting anymore but I was exhausted, starving, shaking, and ready to be done. They wheeled me over without my husband so they could give me a spinal anesthetic, still no epidural. I sat there breathing in and out. Using yoga techniques to keep myself present and prepared for a flexible response. I hate the idea of needles going into my spine. I don't care about needles...it's the whole losing movement permanently issue. I need to be able to move and fidget to breathe calmly and react appropriately.

After they were finished, they slowly lowered me back. My legs went numbs and I started to shake uncontrollably. My teeth started chattering. It was if I was extremely cold so they put 3-4 warm blankets on me. I can't remember how many but I do know there were 5 total on me when all was said and done. They splayed my arms out like I was being crucified and I made sure not to move them beyond the shaking. I have no clue how long the procedure lasted but it was light outside when they were done. I believe it was less than an hour, but I honestly don't know. Time had become irrelevant yet so necessary by then. Time still hasn't recovered and it's been almost 3 weeks. (Note: I've been writing this on and off since the hospital stay.)

C-sections are weird. You're awake for the whole procedure and you can feel everything happening to you - the incision, the hands rooting around your insides for the baby, the baby coming out with their arms and legs hitting the sides of your open stomach as they leave, the uterus flopping around. There's just no pain involved.

When my baby came out, he didn't cry much, but when I heard his first squeal, my husband and I cried, too. He was finally here. Our baby boy was alive and well. A 7lb 5oz baby measuring at 20 inches even though he was a few weeks early. He was fully grown and ready to be with us. They measured him, cleaned him a little and got all his vitals while the doctors finished up with my stomach. They gave him to my husband to hold and I got to slightly touch the baby. I cried the whole time because of how happy I was. It was the most fulfilling moment and it was just the beginning of my son's life.

The surgeon was the OBGYN who recommended us to the fertility clinic three years prior, almost to the date. We had come full circle. She still has a weird bedside manner, but the whole thing was surreal. She did a good job and we all made it out safely. My husband was so nervous holding our baby. It was his first time ever holding a baby. I didn't want a c-section, but I was glad when everything was over. My legs remained numb for a while - a few hours I think? In order to graduate to the mother/baby unit and to eat, I had to be able to move my toes. It was a weird feeling to be able to move my arms and not my lower body. Around my incision, I'm still a bit numb there and apparently, I could be for a long time.

We took our first picture together and I look terrible, as if I had gone through pain for 3 days straight. My husband, the always photogenic one, looked great and our son could barely be seen. At least we have this family photo - even if no one else is allowed to see it. My body was still shaking. My shoulders were starting to hurt and feeling was coming back to my lower extremities slowly. They were prescribing me motrin, tylenol and oxy. I only took tylenol because the rest seemed frivolous. Sure, I was in pain, but nothing compared to the contractions and well, I survived all of that with just a tylenol here and there for headaches.

By about noon, I was starving by this point. It had been 30ish+ hours of early labor since I had last eaten. We ordered food (with some hiccups along the way) and finally got to eat when we arrived the mother/baby unit. It was then we started our four day stay of recovering, figuring out parenting, breastfeeding, and personal survival, and being interrupted every hour by nurses, doctors, consultants, social workers and who knows who else. I had only gotten about 2-3 hours of sleep in total during the 3 days of delivery. I matched this during the first few days of parenting, too. Even when I got home, I lived on 2 hours max for about three days straight. A week+ of no sleep really did me in. I was exhausted and finally got rest when I slept through a few alarms. Thankfully my husband took over that night because I needed it.

While in the mother/baby unit, our son had dropped about 10% of his birthweight. He was dehydrated and having a tough time pooping because of the weight loss. It was getting much milk because my nipples wouldn't stay erect while he was eating. Plus he kept falling asleep and it was hard to keep him demeanor.

A lactation consultant visited 6 times. I didn't like the first one, but then we lucked out with Renee for the rest of the visits. She was understanding and she didn't pressure us to breastfeed her way. She thought of different ways to encourage us and give solutions, such as a nipple shield or supplementing formula. Renee revealed that her oldest went through this as well and that it doesn't help when the hospital staff tells you how to do everything their way without listening to your needs. I commend her for her absolutely genuine care and reassuring assistance.

A few nurses were stellar (not Shawna awesome, but still great to have). Katie gave us our first few hours of rest. It also hurt his weight cuz I was delayed on the feedings, but she gave us swaddlers, extra blankets, shirts, etc. She also made sure to talk to us like we were humans and not patients who were leaving in a few days. Kristie was the first one to see me cry and she knew exactly what to do. She brought us the right sized nipple shield and flanges. She brought us a ton of formula. She helped ease my feelings of hopelessness transition into a sense of pointed purpose. The other nurses - Salimah, Anna, Natalie and a few others in the mother/baby unit were the best parts of the stay. Even if they all provided varying levels of care.

The doctors were too quick with their check-ins and I didn't really enjoy their presence. They had the best intentions but we felt like a mark on their checklist. I assume they have too much to do in one day.

The room was small for a three person family but large enough for everything we needed to do while there. Our baby had a little plastic tube of a bassinet with two drawers of storage. My husband had to sleep on the most uncomfortable couch out of the three he ventured on. I believe it was this one that he caught an ear infection from because he didn't use the bed setting. He used the regular couch setup because the bedding was slanting.

The bathroom was pretty big, though. I put many mesh underwear and large pads on in there. It's where a nurses used a perineal bottle on me and showed me how to use it. It's where I took my first post-surgery shower and found out my stomach was numb still. I liked our original room with the induction unit best because of the couch for my husband, and I loved the huge size of the labor/delivery room. The bathroom for the mother/baby unit was best. It was right next to my bed during a time when it was hard to walk. Plus it served as a dish washing site and a great place to rest from all the noises in a hospital.

I had a catheter in from the c-section and by the time they took it out, I was very hydrated. Peeing clear impressed the nurses who took it out - I guess it's the little odd things that make the day better.

My husband and I fought multiple times in the hospital and since coming home. We're exhausted. We don't fight often, but when we do, it is normally because one of us is tired...and well, we're always tired right now.

-----

It's now 6 weeks post delivery and our little guy is doing well. He's a tad under the weather (doctors says a cold), but otherwise he is 11 pounds and 22 inches long. He grows pretty fast so he may be heavier by now.

These last few weeks have been very tough and I've gone through a lot of emotions. It's a lot of work and we asked for it. We really wanted a child and now we're finding out how hard it is to raise one. Yet would I trade my son for anything? No. This shows how bad we wanted a child and also how much we are still willing to sacrifice in order to hold him for many more years. The birthing experience was not what I wanted, but he came home. That's all I prayed for...and it's exactly what we got. I can only be thankful to God for his life right now. My heart feels warm.

-----

This post took six weeks to write because I don't have much time anymore. Most of it was done while in the hospital, but some parts had to be completed or filled in afterwards. It barely covers everything that happened during our 6-day stay. It was a long and arduous time, and now we are met we an harder time of caretaking. Parenthood is so glamorized and I'm here to tell you how much it shouldn't be. The afterglow is wonderful and the heart fuzziness is neverending. No, seriously. I feel joy even when my son is crying and I don't know what to do to help. Yet, we paint pictures of cuddling babies and doing fun activities, but it's a lot more than that. Make sure you want a baby before having one. It's a lot of work to get to the time where they can take care of themselves alongside you. It's years of waiting for them to grow old enough to just pee on their on own. It's many days wondering if you're doing okay as a guardian. You just hope they survive your mistakes and your novice-abilities of taking care of a human life. As rewarding as it may be, you are forever changed. For at least the beginning parts, you will not have much time to do anything for yourselves besides eat and sleep, which is still something you lose and have to reteach yourself and your baby how to do at the same time.

I'm not complaining, just not being dishonest. I'd rather be open about my struggles than to sink in self-negligence. Sure, I probably have postpartum depression in a mild sense, but I am actively working to go beyond it. It's been tough to not have much time for myself, but I can't give up. I have to do this for my baby and for my husband. I have to keep going for myself, too. I owe it to me.

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parachim · 7 years ago

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I had top surgery yesterday whoo!! Summary of the entire experience below

I had started T Feb 13 of the previous year. My insurance doesn’t require me to be on T for the surgery but it probably made it easier to convince all the medical staff along the way.

Early November - In a panic about will I have health insurance after 2018 because of trump fuckery I started researching drs who did the surgery in the area. Turns out there are 3 in total in Pittsburgh. I went with Dr. Grunwaldt because her office got back to me first.

Mid November - Meet with a regular general practitioner in the area that had trans patient experience. I probably didn’t absolutely need to do this but it updated my records within the UPMC system and got me a referral to a therapist.

Meet with the therapist. Lots and lots of life history questions. This doesn’t bother me but if you’re seeking this sort of thing be prepared to get into the nitty gritty details of your life. She’s says she’ll give me the letter after the first session. There’s some scheduling issues about getting it when I originally planned but I got it in December and was also able to use the letter to get my new insurance to cover my T script for $50 well spent.

End of November - Meet with the surgeon for the first time. Asks me some basic medical history and looks at the surgical site. Takes some pictures and describes the basics of the process. Says she has no problem doing it she just needs the letter. Also bonus points here since she had no issue with me being nonbinary and was good about pronouns.

December - Surgeon’s office asks for a letter from my previous doctor from Boston to back up some of my records. I was worried about getting this but shout out to Dr. Vetters from Sidney Borum getting it done in 24 hrs.

January - Call the surgeons office to tell them that my new insurance has kicked in. They submit the paperwork to have insurance cover the procedure. Insurance approves it no issue at all. (Though, this is a UPMC doctor in a UPMC hospital petitioning to UPMC insurance so this is probably as straightforward as it gets).

Got my appt scheduled for Feb 21 originally and then it was moved to Feb 28 because of scheduling issues.

February - I have a pre-opt appointment on the 13th. They look me over again and confirm some medical history. They give me the scripts to fill ahead of time for the day of the surgery. Surgeon is concerned about some of the mild acne on my chest so I end up using an online UPMC dermatologist to get some antibiotics and some washes to clear it up.

Day of the Surgery - Arrive at UPMC Children’s on time (I no longer count as a pediatric patient but the surgeon is specialized in this and does older patents at the hospital.) Check in at the same day surgery counter. Confirm my identity and everyone I’m with also has to show their ID and get a sticker. They also have to confirm they haven’t been out of the country in 3 weeks.

I get called back and they check blood pressure, pulse, height and weight, Have me take off my clothes and use some special cleaning wipes all over my body. I get to put on a gown, some awful disposable underwear, and some grippy socks. I get a bag for my clothes that I eventually hand off to my mom.

I’m taken to another room and I meet with the surgeon. She marks up up with the surgical marker to prepare everything.

I then meet with someone from the anesthesia team who has me sign a consent form. Then I see someone from the pain team that gives me the option to have a nerve block injected into my chest after anesthesia. I don’t know if this is something offered everywhere but it seemed to help. I meet with a nurse who had me fill in some medical info and also choose someone as my person if something goes wrong and sign off on those forms. Me and my family wait around for a while because the surgery before me was delayed. We probably wait for about 45 minutes before I’m taken back by myself into the initial anesthesia room.

New person takes me back to that room and puts in my IV and takes my blood pressure again. The anesthesiologist comes in and hooks up my IV to The Good Stuff and I’m out of it pretty fast.

About 4 hours later I’m wheeled into a recovery area where my family is and I wake up. There’s a screen with movies you can pick on it and I pick The Incredibles but I’m too spaced out/sleepy to really watch but since I already knew the plot of the movie it was a good way for me to gauge how much time had passed. They gave me some apply juice as you had to have so much fluid before leaving. My parents went and filled my scripts for a second time ?? so now I have double of everything (and that’s why there’s an opiod epidemic...).

After I started feeling more awake I got up and moved to a chair. I felt nauseated after that and barfed about a mouthful of apple juice. They reattached my IV to a bolus and I felt a lot better after that. Got dressed in my regular clothes and they went over how to deal with the drains.

Someone came by with a wheelchair when I was good to go and wheeled me over to the car. Went home and I’ve been pretty good since then. Pain is very mild and my appetite is normal. I have to go back in a week when they’ll take the dressings off and drains out so I can see everything better.

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closedspeciesdrama · 7 years ago

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Burningwhite - PSA

Hey! LunarLilac here from DA sharing this journal with some updates!~

This is a PSA to beware the person known as @/Burningwhite on DA also known as MunkWhite on Discord/Skype and Shire on FA. They may go by other names as well, but these are the ones I know of. I implore all of you to share this journal! Post it everywhere, DA, Tumblr, FA, Facebook, on everything you’re on! Save others from going through the same thing and protect your fellow artists! ————————————————————————————————– Update 9/3/2017: Linking whites accounts that I know of for people to block~ Toyhouse - toyhou.se/Burningwhite and toyhou.se/Input Furaffinity - www.furaffinity.net/user/shiir… and www.furaffinity.net/user/burni… and www.furaffinity.net/user/degil… ————————————————————————————————– Warning 9/5/2017: Unfortunately I have to mention this. Any comments regarding the LGBTQ community will be hidden. That is not the point of this post just because it is mentioned that White is trans doesn’t make all trans people bad. Please keep all commented related to White’s actions (not her sexuality/identity of what she identifies as), what they’ve done to you and the degil species. You are entitled to your own opinion, but as I stated, White being trans is NOT the main point of this journal. ————————————————————————————————– Update 9/8/2017: So if any of you have been checking degils or looking at my gallery and may have noticed I tried to revoke the Sunset Tiger mascot design from degils. Turns out I cannot legally revoke this design since White now owns the copyright and will not relinquish it back to me, but I’ve just learned something else. White seems to be trying to find “sleazy loopholes” to revoke designs from people. I have blacked out the name of the person I spoke with about legal rights of my design and revoking it as I do not wish to cause any drama for them. I am assuming the person they’re talking about is @/Roiell-arts also known as Zena because white has been trying to get their Roiell character ever since Zena left the degil species and took the design with them. Roiell also has a small psa on white -

PSADA/FA user Burnignwhite/Shirree and any alt accounts. White has tried to blackmail Zena out of 150$ to allow them to keep their own character and so White would back off from taking that character. She did not “sell” Roiell to Zena since Roiell was already Zena’s. She blackmailed 150$ out of Zena to make her leave Zena alone. White manipulated another user into taking the 150$ from Zena into their paypal as white did not want Zena having her paypal. This money was later returned by the 3rd party user and white turned around saying that user “scammed” them out of the 150$ - sta.sh/2mlosaz22ki However no sooner after telling me that she left Roiell alone she turns around and tells me she wants to stress Zena out more. White was giving them trouble before for no reason just because she wanted to get a character (Vesta) back from them - ————————————————————————————————– I will not be taking down this journal regardless of what they say even if they post on this journal or have their friends post on here. For those of you who care about pronouns please let me state now that White never told me whether them to call me he/she/they/it. Therefore you may notice I tend to call White “him/he” more than anything as that is just my default pronoun and I truly apologize if this offends those of you who care about pronouns. White has caused a lot of people grief and stress, including myself. Earlier this year White had asked me to make a base for the @/Degil-Hollow group after I had entered a mascot contest for the group. I had agreed to try making a base, however they never discussed payment for this. They had later also asked me to do the trait sheets to which would be asked as compensation for backing out of the base, trait sheets, and most of all their Shara commission. White had asked for all of these things to be done in 1 month and every time I tried to do them they were pushed to the back burner and he asked me to do something else be it his shara ref or a piece of gift art. This is the commission of Shara he asked for - This is not all of it, it is missing the nsfw portion on it as I am still a minor and I didn’t want to draw those pieces. When I am 18 those sketches will be posted to my FA. I was offered a single character as payment for this whole ref. Some things on there were not agreed to when he first asked for it such as the 3 outfits. During the process of the sketch which White constantly had me stream to him, he was extremely picky about every little detail passed the point of frustration. When I had asked for more payment I was thrown low quality adopts as “payment” to pick from. When I said no to those they showed me the two characters of theirs I liked and told me I could have them on the terms that I - 1. Don’t make gore art of them. 2. If the “friendship” between white and I broke off the character would be returned to them. and 3. Any ships the character was in with whites characters had to stay the same. I declined those terms as I do not think its fair that I would have to return a character over a friendship. White would be making off with a free reference of his char pretty much while I had lost the “payment” I would’ve gotten for that reference. Now before I go on let me say that White is a minor, they are only 16 years old. They have been commissioning NSFW stuff from other artists and asking other minors to do gift art of nsfw things even if they decline it. This can get people into trouble as it is illegal to sell NSFW things to minors. White had also guilt tripped a piece of gift art out of me. There are 4 different versions to this gift art. The two shown above are the SFW versions, the other two are the same ones above except with nipples on the art. There was only supposed to be 1 version of this piece of art and White forced me to make 3 other versions, one without the halo I had put on it and then two others with nipples on the first two versions. White also had me design their kobalt creature for them for their animation class which I tried colors I wanted to test on them that White hated so he went with different colors. I later used those colors on one of my characters in slightly different hues and White forced me to change them calling it a ripoff of his kobalt and that he’d see it as his character because it was basically one of his “old” designs from the designing process of his character. On top of all of this, White had been trying to get between me and my current boyfriend of 2 years. At the time I had known White only a few weeks if maybe a month and he claimed to have loved me. He tried to force me into a poly relationship with him to which I did not agree to. He then told me he was trans (male to female) and wanted me to be bi-curious/lesbian for him when I told him many times I was straight. His response to me being straight was “a noodle is only straight until its wet.” When that did not work White constantly complained about my boyfriend and tried to find ways to make me break up with him, even trying to force me to split my time by giving White 50 percent of my time and my boyfriend 50 percent of my time. He demanded movies every Fridays, calls every night before he went to bed at 2-4am my time and wanted me to spend every single evening with him talking about art, degils, fluff, and his characters. He tried to get me to teach him art, but most of the time he just sat there crying about not knowing how to do the sketch and didn’t even bother trying to do it. He later blamed me for the reason he couldn’t draw. This is the proof for everything above - sta.sh/2daftob1pj4?edit=1 Soon after this I had blocked White for the first time on Skype, White then contacted me on DA crying that they missed me and wanted a second chance. He begged to try to regain my trust back on DA. So I decided to give them a second chance. It took something drastic to make them lay off a little. They had recently opened up designer applications in their degil species and I decided to try it out, but I found out that was the worst choice I’ve made. On all the designs I’ve made so far from their species they constantly complained about the nose being wrong and they forced me to change themes on their whims because they thought a certain pose looked more like this theme. They were constantly making me do the designs to what they liked, they have a bias against leopard/cheetah spots and hate the color black so they tried to force me not to use either of those things. On the egyptian blues, I had put snow leopard spots, I was forced to remove them because White hates spots and believes they are overused and has told me they’re not allowed on degil designs, however this would mean requiring all previous degil designs to remove any type of spots they have. During the sweltering fire designing process white had forced me to change its pose from a rainbow theme to a fire theme, when I said I was going to do a black base he claimed there had been too many black bases recently as to why I couldn’t use the color black at all on the design, but when I looked there was only 1. He had approved the fire I had on the hooves and when it was finished he changed his mind and forced me to remove it and fought with me about the color of the fire being green. When I told him the green fire did not match the design he went on to complain about the silk color being ugly since it was black and constantly nagged “what about the silk?” until I changed it. According to white he thinks designers do whatever the owner tells them, when they tell them to do it and it has to be exactly their way down to every detail meaning that designers don’t really get to pick anything about the design. The designers aren’t even considered staff to him. I had asked White to remove me from designer as I was tired of the drama and instead he cried about being stressed as to why he does everything he does (he uses this stress excuse for every single thing). He then turned me over to the co-founder to tell her what was going on and she understood completely. All white had to say to me was “please don’t leave, think about staying, you’re the only designer I have!” The other designer White had in the group was not making any designs, hence why I was the only designer. White refused to remove them from their designer status for whatever reason despite both me and the co-founder telling him to get rid of them if they’re not doing their job. The degil species will die with White so long as he is owner. White’s co-founder was the one doing everything in the group and once she is gone he will be lost with how to run the group. A few of us have been telling White to step down from owning degils as they can’t run the group properly and don’t treat their staff nor members with the respect he demands from us. White refuses to give up degils and claim they will either succeed with them or die with them. White currently claims to be trying to change within 3 months and will probably claim that this is ruining his reputation even more that he says hes trying to “fix” right now. This is the proof from this recent bit - sta.sh/23dve9jh2lx?edit=1 I apologize for how long this journal is. Those of you who have had dealings with White are welcome to share your proof in the comments, but for those of you who have yet to deal with White let this be a warning to you as this is what may happen to you.

If you cannot see the stash files above here is the drop box with my screencaps - https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/0B8sJSUUHwaO2b205S1U0ZW5qaWc?usp=sharing

#closedspecies #submission #burningwhite #drama #psa

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onemoresoultothecall · 8 years ago

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so sometimes i do feel like it’s important to highlight the common struggles that trans people experience on a daily basis, which cis individuals may not even comprehend.

today, these struggles for me focused on what it’s like when your documentation doesn’t fully match your gender identity. now, i recognize that i am lucky. i have trans siblings who have been unable to change their name and secure any piece of documentation that accurately reflects their gender identity. i have an ID and a credit card at this point. but that hasn’t been enough to help me in all settings.

so, today, this is what i encountered:

- called for a medical appointment with a place that knows me and has my “preferred” name down. still got called by my birth name.

- actually surprisingly had a pretty good experience of checking in and having them refer to me properly and express understanding that i was still working on changing my insurance card but they were very respectful.

- had an alright experience with the nurse/doctor combo, who are always good about using my name/pronouns.

- got hit with my birth name - although it was quickly corrected - when i had to check out.

- had to use my birth name to pick up the meds this doctor ordered for me.

now, maybe you’d say that i’m too sensitive, if these types of things upset me and, hell, maybe i am. but these are the types of situations i encounter on a daily basis. my name still can’t be changed at work, which means it can’t be changed on my insurance, which means none of my doctors can use it in my official documentation. at work i also have the constant experience of having my birth name in my face everywhere because it’s attached to every account i have there.

and it’s awkward. it’s almost progressively more awkward as i get closer and closer to consistently passing because it’s becoming something that outs me in public places. i get introduced as j.d. and male pronouns to new coworkers, for instance, and then they email me and see my birth name instead.

and, something i am becoming very familiar with these days, is that i will also have to out myself as trans most likely for the rest of my life in the job application process - unless i am self-employed one day - because my line of work requires background checks and you have to disclose all previous names on background checks.

and through all of this, i keep remembering that for me this process has been easier than it has for many of my trans siblings who do not have access to transition related care or have the finances for a name change and getting all legal documentation updated. i know i’ve run into some obstacles others haven’t - for instance, i know several people who had non-work related insurance and were able to get that changed immediately after their name change; or i’ve had friends who got their name change and had it immediately switched over in their work system - but i also know that as a whole, i’ve been pretty lucky in this process.

and it is still hell every day. i am in constant anxiety and having all sorts of physiological symptoms because i am just such a ball of stress and constantly having panic attacks and things like that. i cry at least a few times a week because i’m just so overwhelmed and frustrated with how slowly things are going.

and i’m still pretty sure that i’m one of the comparatively lucky ones.

so support your trans friends and family. because the transition process isn’t easy and it’s not easy even when you have access to support and things like that. it’s not easy to live in this world as a trans person and the trans people you know are likely encountering struggles on a fairly regular basis, especially depending on where they are in their transition.

#gender identity stuff #transgender #transmasculine #transman #but really for all trans individuals

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neogender · 5 years ago

Note

Lame is not ableist. It’s become slang for something that sucks. No one has used the word to describe someone who has a physical disability for a very long time in popular culture. You’re looking for things to squawk about.

Lame is fucking ableist

New meanings aren’t random

So why isn’t more attention being paid to words like lame?

Those who use these expressions tend to try to justify their use in one of two ways.

First, disability is (in their view) actually a bad thing. As one blogger explained:

(It goes without saying that many people with disabilities would object to having their identity hijacked as the automatic stand-in for all things bad.)

Second, it can be argued – and with some legitimacy – that some of these terms no longer generally refer to disability. Languages change. New meanings emerge from old ones.

Lame is fucking ableist

Why is it so difficult to see that using these words as pejoratives is just as problematic as the once-popular put-down “That’s so gay”?

Lame is fucking ableist

To be completely clear, lame is a slur. There are countless others out there, but this word in particular seems to be forgiven or forgotten more than any others.

Lame is fucking ableist

We don’t say the r-word anymore. But have you heard someone say one of these recently?

“He’s so crazy.”

“The weather is schizophrenic.”

“Our workload is insane.”

“That’s lame.”

I have, and I’m trying to stop. All the phrases use ableist language.

Lame is fucking ableist

A disabled body should not appear in articles about how lame that sexist movie is or how insane racism is. A disabled body should be no more available for commentary than a nondisabled one.

The core problem with using a body as a metaphor is that people actually live in bodies. We are not just paralyzed legs, or deaf ears, or blind eyes.

When we become reduced to our disabilities, others very quickly forget that there are people involved here. We are no longer seen as whole, living, breathing human beings.

Our bodies have simply been put into the service of your cause without our permission.

Lame is fucking ableist

If one of these 12 words is still in your vocabulary, it's time to reframe, rethink and reimagine your word choices.

1. "Lame"

If you're still using the word "lame," you might want to give your internal dictionary a serious update.

Lame is fucking ableist

...

Lame is fucking ableist

What we sometimes say: “That is so lame!”

Being lame does not mean uncool. Being lame means you are physically impaired from using your legs, yet even within this context it is still an offensive and outdated term.

If a person who has use of their legs, they should not be using a word describing a physical inhibition to describe something they are not a fan of.

What we actually mean, and what we should say: Uncool, cheesy, tacky, corny.

Lame is fucking ableist

“That joke was so lame!”

Alternatives: Unimpressive, Boring, Tedious, Uninspiring, Tiresome, Lacklustre, Meh

Lame is fucking ableist

2. "That's Lame."

Although "lame" is often used to disparage something these days, its original definition refers to the inability to walk. When you say something is lame, you equate lameness with negativity.

Lame is fucking ableist

Lame is fucking ableist.

Unintended ableism

Words like “blind”, “deaf,” “dumb,” “idiot,” “insane,” “lame,” “nuts,” and “psycho” are all ableist.

Saying what you mean can prevent the use of offensive shortcuts. For some inspiration, check out the work of some great disability activists.

Lame is fucking ableist.

Don’t be an ableist dick.

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lunarlilac1 · 7 years ago

Text

PSA - Burningwhite

Hello! This is a PSA to beware the person known as @/Burningwhite on DA also known as MunkWhite on Discord/Skype and Shire on FA. They may go by other names as well, but these are the ones I know of. I implore all of you to share this journal! Post it everywhere, DA, Tumblr, FA, Facebook, on everything you're on! Save others from going through the same thing and protect your fellow artists! ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Update 9/3/2017: Linking whites accounts that I know of for people to block~ Toyhouse - toyhou.se/Burningwhite and toyhou.se/Input Furaffinity - www.furaffinity.net/user/shiir… and www.furaffinity.net/user/burni… and www.furaffinity.net/user/degil… ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Warning 9/5/2017: Unfortunately I have to mention this. Any comments regarding the LGBTQ community will be hidden. That is not the point of this post just because it is mentioned that White is trans doesn't make all trans people bad. Please keep all commented related to White's actions (not her sexuality/identity of what she identifies as), what they've done to you and the degil species. You are entitled to your own opinion, but as I stated, White being trans is NOT the main point of this journal. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Update 9/8/2017: So if any of you have been checking degils or looking at my gallery and may have noticed I tried to revoke the Sunset Tiger mascot design from degils. Turns out I cannot legally revoke this design since White now owns the copyright and will not relinquish it back to me, but I've just learned something else. White seems to be trying to find "sleazy loopholes" to revoke designs from people. I have blacked out the name of the person I spoke with about legal rights of my design and revoking it as I do not wish to cause any drama for them. I am assuming the person they're talking about is @/Roiell-arts also known as Zena because white has been trying to get their Roiell character ever since Zena left the degil species and took the design with them. Roiell also has a small psa on white - PSA White has tried to blackmail Zena out of 150$ to allow them to keep their own character and so White would back off from taking that character. https://sta.sh/0qqxsi7rj99 She did not "sell" Roiell to Zena since Roiell was already Zena's. She blackmailed 150$ out of Zena to make her leave Zena alone. White manipulated another user into taking the 150$ from Zena into their paypal as white did not want Zena having her paypal. This money was later returned by the 3rd party user and white turned around saying that user "scammed" them out of the 150$ - sta.sh/2mlosaz22ki However no sooner after telling me that she left Roiell alone she turns around and tells me she wants to stress Zena out more. White was giving them trouble before for no reason just because she wanted to get a character (Vesta) back from them - https://sta.sh/221nrhcracfv?edit=1 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I will not be taking down this journal regardless of what they say even if they post on this journal or have their friends post on here. For those of you who care about pronouns please let me state now that White never told me whether them to call me he/she/they/it. Therefore you may notice I tend to call White "him/he" more than anything as that is just my default pronoun and I truly apologize if this offends those of you who care about pronouns. White has caused a lot of people grief and stress, including myself. Earlier this year White had asked me to make a base for the @/Degil-Hollow group after I had entered a mascot contest for the group. I had agreed to try making a base, however they never discussed payment for this. They had later also asked me to do the trait sheets to which would be asked as compensation for backing out of the base, trait sheets, and most of all their Shara commission. White had asked for all of these things to be done in 1 month and every time I tried to do them they were pushed to the back burner and he asked me to do something else be it his shara ref or a piece of gift art. This is the commission of Shara he asked for - https://lunarlilac.deviantart.com/art/Shara-Ref-Canceled-Commission-WIP-665825150 Drawings & Paintings > Other"> This is not all of it, it is missing the nsfw portion on it as I am still a minor and I didn't want to draw those pieces. When I am 18 those sketches will be posted to my FA. I was offered a single character as payment for this whole ref. Some things on there were not agreed to when he first asked for it such as the 3 outfits. During the process of the sketch which White constantly had me stream to him, he was extremely picky about every little detail passed the point of frustration. When I had asked for more payment I was thrown low quality adopts as "payment" to pick from. When I said no to those they showed me the two characters of theirs I liked and told me I could have them on the terms that I - 1. Don't make gore art of them. 2. If the "friendship" between white and I broke off the character would be returned to them. and 3. Any ships the character was in with whites characters had to stay the same. I declined those terms as I do not think its fair that I would have to return a character over a friendship. White would be making off with a free reference of his char pretty much while I had lost the "payment" I would've gotten for that reference. Now before I go on let me say that White is a minor, they are only 16 years old. They have been commissioning NSFW stuff from other artists and asking other minors to do gift art of nsfw things even if they decline it. This can get people into trouble as it is illegal to sell NSFW things to minors. White had also guilt tripped a piece of gift art out of me. https://lunarlilac.deviantart.com/art/Thrayn-Without-Halo-659785220 https://lunarlilac.deviantart.com/art/Thrayn-659778171

There are 4 different versions to this gift art. The two shown above are the SFW versions, the other two are the same ones above except with nipples on the art. There was only supposed to be 1 version of this piece of art and White forced me to make 3 other versions, one without the halo I had put on it and then two others with nipples on the first two versions. White also had me design their kobalt creature for them for their animation class which I tried colors I wanted to test on them that White hated so he went with different colors. I later used those colors on one of my characters in slightly different hues and White forced me to change them calling it a ripoff of his kobalt and that he'd see it as his character because it was basically one of his "old" designs from the designing process of his character. On top of all of this, White had been trying to get between me and my current boyfriend of 2 years. At the time I had known White only a few weeks if maybe a month and he claimed to have loved me. He tried to force me into a poly relationship with him to which I did not agree to. He then told me he was trans (male to female) and wanted me to be bi-curious/lesbian for him when I told him many times I was straight. His response to me being straight was "a noodle is only straight until its wet." When that did not work White constantly complained about my boyfriend and tried to find ways to make me break up with him, even trying to force me to split my time by giving White 50 percent of my time and my boyfriend 50 percent of my time. He demanded movies every Fridays, calls every night before he went to bed at 2-4am my time and wanted me to spend every single evening with him talking about art, degils, fluff, and his characters. He tried to get me to teach him art, but most of the time he just sat there crying about not knowing how to do the sketch and didn't even bother trying to do it. He later blamed me for the reason he couldn't draw. This is the proof for everything above - sta.sh/2daftob1pj4?edit=1 Soon after this I had blocked White for the first time on Skype, White then contacted me on DA crying that they missed me and wanted a second chance. He begged to try to regain my trust back on DA. So I decided to give them a second chance. It took something drastic to make them lay off a little. They had recently opened up designer applications in their degil species and I decided to try it out, but I found out that was the worst choice I've made. On all the designs I've made so far from their species they constantly complained about the nose being wrong and they forced me to change themes on their whims because they thought a certain pose looked more like this theme. They were constantly making me do the designs to what they liked, they have a bias against leopard/cheetah spots and hate the color black so they tried to force me not to use either of those things. On the egyptian blues, I had put snow leopard spots, I was forced to remove them because White hates spots and believes they are overused and has told me they're not allowed on degil designs, however this would mean requiring all previous degil designs to remove any type of spots they have. During the sweltering fire designing process white had forced me to change its pose from a rainbow theme to a fire theme, when I said I was going to do a black base he claimed there had been too many black bases recently as to why I couldn't use the color black at all on the design, but when I looked there was only 1. He had approved the fire I had on the hooves and when it was finished he changed his mind and forced me to remove it and fought with me about the color of the fire being green. When I told him the green fire did not match the design he went on to complain about the silk color being ugly since it was black and constantly nagged "what about the silk?" until I changed it. According to white he thinks designers do whatever the owner tells them, when they tell them to do it and it has to be exactly their way down to every detail meaning that designers don't really get to pick anything about the design. The designers aren't even considered staff to him. I had asked White to remove me from designer as I was tired of the drama and instead he cried about being stressed as to why he does everything he does (he uses this stress excuse for every single thing). He then turned me over to the co-founder to tell her what was going on and she understood completely. All white had to say to me was "please don't leave, think about staying, you're the only designer I have!" The other designer White had in the group was not making any designs, hence why I was the only designer. White refused to remove them from their designer status for whatever reason despite both me and the co-founder telling him to get rid of them if they're not doing their job. The degil species will die with White so long as he is owner. White's co-founder was the one doing everything in the group and once she is gone he will be lost with how to run the group. A few of us have been telling White to step down from owning degils as they can't run the group properly and don't treat their staff nor members with the respect he demands from us. White refuses to give up degils and claim they will either succeed with them or die with them. White currently claims to be trying to change within 3 months and will probably claim that this is ruining his reputation even more that he says hes trying to "fix" right now. This is the proof from this recent bit - sta.sh/23dve9jh2lx?edit=1 I apologize for how long this journal is. Those of you who have had dealings with White are welcome to share your proof in the comments, but for those of you who have yet to deal with White let this be a warning to you as this is what may happen to you. Dropbox with all my proof screenshots in case the stashes above cant be seen - https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/0B8sJSUUHwaO2b205S1U0ZW5qaWc

#ClosedSpecies #burningwhite #drama #Submission #deviantart

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