#in the literal same way Yennefer tried to

[fanby-fckry]

I Didn’t Peg You for a Sore Loser (But Here We Are)

Day 1 of Kinktober, 2023: Pegging

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: None

Word Count: 2,297

Fandom: The Witcher

Relationships: Jaskier/Yennefer, Background Jaskier/OC, Background Yennefer/OC, Implied Geralt/Jaskier/Yennefer Polyamory

Characters: Jaskier, Yennefer, Geralt

Additional Tags: Friends With Benefits, Bets & Wagers, Sex Toys, Pegging, Nipple Clamps

Summary: Jaskier and Yennefer make a bet. Loser bottoms.

Better on AO3

{ ✧ }

Jaskier couldn’t take his eyes off her. The way her dark hair pooled across her shoulders, the way her lips curved when she laughed. And those eyes… captivating. Truly, this woman had caught not only his eye, but his heart; he needed to tell her.

Jaskier rose from his seat, only to be stopped short by an iron grip on his arm.

“Sit back down, Bard,” Yennefer said, pulling Jaskier back onto the bench beside her. She nodded towards the woman across the tavern – the beautiful brunette with the emerald green eyes that Jaskier was certain he’d fallen in love with – and said bluntly, “She beds women.”

“We’ll have something in common then,” Jaskier quipped, and tried to get up again.

“Only women,” Yennefer said firmly, shoving Jaskier down again.

Jaskier huffed. He was growing rather tired of being literally pushed around. And besides…

“How could you possibly know that, Witch?” he demanded. “Do you know her? Did you… did you read her mind?”

“No, and no,” Yennefer replied.

“Then, how?”

Yennefer smirked. “Intuition. She has a way about her.”

Jaskier turned his gaze back to brunette. She was sitting at a table with two men and one other woman, talking and laughing as she ate. She didn’t seem to be involved with or attracted to any of them. No lingering touches, no longing gazes, and no overt intimacy, either.

It’s not that Jaskier didn’t understand what Yennefer meant by ‘intuition.’ He often had the same experience, although usually in the other direction. An inexplicable, yet innate sense of when a man might be interested in sharing his bed with another man.

It was a very useful skill to have. It would be more useful if he chose to heed it when it told him a man he was interested in wouldn’t reciprocate – but nothing ventured, nothing gained. Speaking of which…

“I. Call. Bullshit.” He laid each word out separately, presenting them to the Witch like a challenge. “I think you’re trying to narrow down the competition. You’re just as taken with her as I am, and you want me out of the way to better your odds.”

“There’s no competition, Jaskier,” Yennefer said. “Even if she bedded men, I would come out on top.”

Jaskier narrowed his eyes. “Wanna bet?”

“Sure,” Yennefer said without missing a beat. “I’ll even let you go first. To prove I wasn’t trying to ‘get you out of the way.’”

Jaskier rose to his feet only to be immediately pulled back down again.

“Fuck, what is it this time?” he asked.

“We haven’t chosen stakes.”

Oh. No, they hadn’t.

“Umm…” Jaskier looked from Yennefer to the brunette and back again, trying to think of appropriate stakes. But it was hard to concentrate on anything besides those gorgeous, green eyes.

“Maybe I should choose,” Yennefer said. “Since you’re busy thinking with your other head.”

“I am not-” Jaskier started to protest, but quickly gave up. “Oh alright, you pick, then. What’ll it be, Yennefer?”

“Hmm,” she hummed. After a moment’s thought, she answered, “Winner fucks her, loser gets fucked.”

“As in…?”

“As in if you take her to bed, I’ll let you stick your cock in me when you get back.” That’d happened a few times now. They’d grown closer – in more ways than one – since Jaskier had realized she wasn’t going to steal Geralt away from him.

“But if I take her to bed,” Yennefer continued. “I’ll come back and pound your arse harder than the collision of the spheres.”

In truth, Jaskier wouldn’t consider either of those outcomes a loss.

“And if neither of us bed her?”

Yennefer took a drink. “Then Destiny fucks us both.”

Jaskier winced. “She’s been doing a lot of that anyway,” he said under his breath.

He turned to address Yennefer. “Alright, Witch. I accept your terms. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m off to work some magic of my own.”

{ ✧ }

Twenty minutes later, Jaskier was sulking alone at the table he once shared with Yennefer when Geralt sat down beside him.

“I picked up a contract,” Geralt told him. “But there’s not much to go on. I’m going to talk to some of the locals, see if I can get more information.” He scanned the rest of the tavern over his shoulder. “Where’s Yen?”

Jaskier sighed. “Winning a bet.”

{ ✧ }

“You cheated,” Jaskier accused. “You cheated, didn’t you? You awful, horrid Witch. You read her mind beforehand, lied about it, and egged me on so that I’d make a fool of myself.”

Yennefer raised one eyebrow. “I did no such thing, Bard,” she said calmly. “I even tried to warn you, out of the goodness of my heart. And besides, you don’t need any help making a fool of yourself.”

“Out of the goodness of your heart,” Jaskier mimicked. “What an absolute load of-”

Yennefer fixed Jaskier with a stare that made his words die on his tongue. “You know, Bard.” She took a step closer, looking him up and down with violet eyes. There was chaos in those eyes, there always was – like a tempest brewed behind them. And she wore a wicked grin to match.

“I didn’t peg you for a sore loser.” She was close. So close, he could feel her breath on his skin. “But here we are.” So close, close enough to kiss.

Their lips met like storm swept waves crashing into the shore. She was a force of nature, and he, he was caught in her tide.

“Fuck me,” he whispered.

“That’s the plan, Bard.”

They made their way back to Yennefer’s room. She’d bewitched it as she always did, transforming what was once a drab bedroom with a shabby straw mattress into a thing of luxury.

Jaskier let himself be pushed onto the bed, now all soft down, velvet, and silk. He wouldn’t give up traveling with Geralt for all the comforts in the continent, but Melitele’s tits, it was nice to have a proper bed underneath him. Maybe he could convince Yennefer to let him and Geralt both spend nights with her when the three of them crossed paths.

“You know,” Jaskier said. Yennefer had left him, lying naked on the bed while she went to sift through a draw in one of the ornate dressers she’d conjured up. “I didn’t ask, but how is this going to work? Are you going to use your fingers or do you…”

His question was answered when Yennefer turned to show him that she’d found what she was looking for. In her hand, she held a length of polished, dark stone, sculpted in the shape of a phallus – and not a small one, either. Nothing he couldn’t take, of course, but it would absolutely be better than her fingers.

“Oh, fuck yes,” he said, eyes locked on the Witch and her dick. His own dick was very interested in the idea of it.

Yennefer exuded confidence and competence in almost every situation, including and especially in bed. There was no doubt in Jaskier’s mind that she knew her way around that toy.

Yennefer brought the phallus and a few other choice items back to the bed: a bottle of oil, a leather harness, and a long, silver chain, dripping with jewels. Once he got a closer look, Jaskier recognized the fastenings on either end of the chain. They weren’t meant to be clasped to each other, they were meant to be clasped to him.

“Yennefer, you delightful deviant,” he praised. “You’ve been holding out on me.”

“I’ve been testing the waters,” she said. “Seeing if the ‘Amour of Aedirn’ lives up to his reputation.”

“I’ll assume I exceeded your expectations, then.”

“And why would you think that, Bard?”

“Because you could have anyone you wanted in your bed. But you chose me,” Jaskier bragged.

Yennefer rolled her eyes. “You’re a good fuck and you make very pretty noises. I want to see what you’re like on the receiving end.”

“Then what are you waiting for, Witch?”

Yennefer straddled Jaskier, pushing him flat on the bed. Her hands and her mouth roamed across Jaskier’s chest. Jaskier moaned when she reached his nipple, lips barely grazing it before she sucked it into her mouth.

“Very, very pretty noises,” she praised, before taking him in her mouth again.

Once his left nipple was pert and flushed with blood, she moved on to his right. All the while, his hands were on her, in her hair and over her back. The Witch didn’t complain, and in fact, he could swear he felt her smile against his skin when he whispered her name.

When Yennefer deemed him ready, she retrieved the chain. “I’ll assume you’ve used something like these before,” she said. “But mine are a bit different. They’re enchanted not to cut off blood flow past a certain point; safe to wear for hours at a time. Their only limitations are how much you can handle.”

Jaskier sat up. “Oh, I can handle them, Witch,” he promised. “I bet that- Mmph!” His words were cut short as Yennefer attached the first clamp.

“You’re not really in a position to be making any more bets,” she said.

The metal bit into Jaskier’s skin – part pain and part pleasure. Yennefer added the second clamp and left the weight of the chain to hang in the middle. She skimmed her hand over his chest as he drew in deep breaths.

“Lay back,” she commanded, and Jaskier couldn’t help but obey.

The chain spilled over his chest as he laid on his back, each end having enough slack to fall in small arches over his sides. He relished in the feeling of it – the silver and jewels against his skin, the pressure and the pull of the fastenings.

Meanwhile, Yennefer got to work opening him up. Her hands moved over his hips and thighs, ignoring his dick seemingly on purpose. Jaskier lost track of where she was until one oil slicked finger probed at his entrance.

Jaskier raised his hips to meet her as she pressed her finger inside, and the movement shifted the chain. Jaskier moaned at the combined sensations of Yennefer inside him and the chain tugging at his nipples.

Yennefer sank in up to her third knuckle, and after a few strokes added another. Jaskier writhed beneath her as she found that spot inside him that lit his entire being aflame, and proceeded to tease the everloving hell out of him.

Three fingers in, when Jaskier was alternating between begging and cursing her name, Yennefer stopped. She pulled her fingers free and Jaskier whined at the loss.

“Oh, quiet you,” she scolded, playfully. “You won’t be empty for long, Bard.”

With practiced ease, Yennefer fitted the leather harness over her hips and thighs, stone cock standing proud. She closed her eyes and bit her lip as she slicked the stone with oil, palming her cock as if she could feel the touch.

“Is that enchanted too?” Jaskier asked, curious to see if the Witch’s reactions were just for show. “Does it feel like you really have a cock between your legs?”

Yennefer opened her eyes. “Didn’t think I’d let you have all the fun, did you, little flower?” Her voice was breathy and her eyes full of lust.

“Fuck fuck fuck,” Jaskier cursed. “You have no idea how incredibly sexy you are. Get your cock in me right now or I’m going to hop on it, myself.”

“Flip over, then. I want you from behind.”

Jaskier obeyed, getting on his hands and knees for the Witch and her enchanted cock. The chain tugged harshly at his nipples as he moved, and swung even after he was in position, the momentum still rocking through it. He was practically panting – and he didn’t even have her dick in him, yet!

Yennefer lined herself up at his entrance and slowly pressed her cock inside. Jaskier’s soft moan was matched by a deep inhale from Yennefer as she sunk into him in one, patient stroke.

Her cock was like nothing he’d had in him before. The texture was reminiscent of other toys he’d used in the past, but it tingled with chaos and moved like a living thing – he swore he felt it twitched when Yennefer bottomed out.

“Yennefer,” Jaskier whispered, as she sat, buried to the hilt inside him – most likely adjusting herself to the pressure.

“Jaskier,” she said in return. Her breath hitched as she began to move, rocking her hips and making small thrusts in and out.

“What happened to, ‘harder than the collision of the spheres?’” Jaskier teased.

Yennefer’s thrusts grew faster and harder. “Shut up, Bard,” she said.

“That’s Geralt’s line,” Jaskier commented, matching her movements with his own.

Yennefer grabbed Jaskier by his hair and forced his head down into the bed, quickening her thrusts once again.

The change in angle set Yennefer’s cock on a course to ram directly into Jaskier’s prostate, and any further complaints melted into moans and praises and curses and prayers.

“So good, so fucking good,” he rambled. “So good, Yen. Oh gods, the things you do to me, Witch.”

The clamps rubbed against the bed below him with every stroke of Yennefer’s hips. The soft, silk sheets felt like fire on Jaskier’s raw flesh. The combination of it all was almost too much.

“Yennefer, Yennefer,” he said her name like she was a goddess, and beneath her body, he’d found religion.

Yennefer’s hips stuttered, and she made some ‘very pretty noises’ of her own that Jaskier recognized from their previous encounters. The idea of Yennefer coming inside him combined with the more consistent pressure sent Jaskier tumbling over the edge mere moments after her.

“Best bet I ever lost,” Jaskier said, once he caught his breath again.

[thesleepy1]

Rapunzel, Rapunzel, You Need A Haircut

A/N: An anon requested this fic literally ages ago. Life has been a little crazy for me and I haven’t had much time to do anything as of late. I’m not sure what the future holds for me but I’ll try to keep working on the list of requests I have. I’m also sorry about Keira’s characterization. I don’t really know her character all that well.  

Pairings: No pairings

Summary: In a world where one lifetime can be a brief moment for another, you mark the passage of time by the reaction of those who see your hair. 

Or, “Geralt, Ciri, Yennefer, and Keira react to reader who has really long hair that's close to their butt.” 

Word count: 1,195

Warnings: none lol

Geralt

The room was cold. The fire was low with little embers and few sparks. You would have to tend to it soon. A stable boy had brought in firewood, stacking it to the side of the fireplace. The lad had also brought in buckets of hot water from downstairs. You were grateful for the sight of steam. 

It had been a hard day to say the least. The town’s local beast was not the kindest. It tore through your armor and badly bruised your skin. A bath was what you needed and Geralt, who had fared the same, was desperate to get in the tub. 

The large witcher disposed of his clothes on the ground and climbed into the metal container without wasting time. His hair was still tied up. 

“Geralt,” you scolded him without much heat. Instead of allowing the tangles in your hair to turn into knots, you sat on the edge of the tub and slowly ran a comb through your locks. 

With how long your hair was, there was no way you could get around without caring for it properly. 

“Hmm,” the witcher replied. “Your hair is long.” 

You chuckled at the witcher whose eyes were sticking out of the water. It was a fairly deep container and for once Geralt could truly soak his entire body. “What an astute observation, my dear.” 

“Why do you keep it like that?” 

“Why do you keep yours like that? Why does anyone style their hair in one way or the other?” You smiled at him. You were not trying to be mean, merely pointing out the obvious. 

Geralt shrugged. The water sloshed over the edge. The stable boy would scold the two of you for the mess if you did not wipe it clean. “It would be easier if I cut my hair,” he admitted, “but I like it like this. It looks nice.” 

“It does,” you agreed, “when you properly take care of it, that is.” 

Geralt rolled his eyes. “Fine. Do you want to brush it as well?” 

You could not hide the laugh bubbling from your lips if you tried. You braided Geralt’s hair that night. There was no event to go to, but he looked ready for a court with how beautiful you made him look. 

Ciri

“Your hair is really long—wow, how do you keep it so shiny?” Ciri tried to keep quiet. Her grandmother was giving a speech that she should’ve been paying attention to. The princess was bored of the endless political talks. Tonight was the only night that she had convinced her grandmother to let her sit amongst the guests. 

You were hired to guard a traveling noble man. He sat on the seat towards the front of the amphitheater. Ciri sat above him where you stood watch. 

“I wash it after my morning runs, my lady. I don’t do anything special besides adding some floral scented oil to it when pay allows,” you explained, leaning towards the girl but staying at your post. 

“What kind? It smells divine.” 

You quickly looked around you. The noble man had another guard posted to his other side; a boy who was no older than the princess. Although he was young, he did his job well. You didn’t feel much guilt when you left your post to better speak to the princess. “Rose and vanilla, my lady.” 

“Vanilla? Where could I get some myself?” 

The queen spoke for hours more. You and the princess spent that time conversing about hair oils and dresses and fancy charms and anything else that came to mind. Despite the boring job, you had made yourself a friend. 

Yennefer 

“Mercenary.” The sorceress greeted you with a coldness that would shake a normal man to his bones. 

You just continued on eating your meal. “Mage,” you replied with your mouth full. 

The tavern was crowded despite the early evening. Merchants and farmers alike were filling the space with laughter and curses. There was a game of gwent going on in the corner. The barmaid was making her rounds as fast as she could without spilling anything. A bard was playing some plucky tune that no one was listening to. 

You just wanted to eat a warm meal. 

“I need hired muscle,” the mage continued, sitting down in the seat in front of you without asking for permission. Her eyes swept you, noting the sword over your shoulder and the intricate knot of your hair. “You’re the best I can find on short notice.” 

“And…?” You fiddled with the hair pin keeping your knot together. The mage seemed to be eyeing it like a moth that had just found a flame. When you pulled it out and set it on the table, her pupils dilated. You knew your hair was long, coming down to just past your bottom. People liked to stare at it. Usually you liked the attention but it was rarely good when a mage’s attention lingered on you. 

“I-I can pay handsomely.” She looked as surprised at the stumbling in her words as you were. Though, she recovered quickly. “I just need you to stand next to me and make a point to look menacing.”

You tucked a strand of hair behind your ear and watched her gaze follow the movement. “Does the job offer a hot meal?” 

“I’ll buy you dinner.” 

Keira 

“I don’t understand how anyone can enjoy being out here,” Keira remarked. 

It had been your suggestion to take a walk that morning. Spring was only just arriving, the soft sun gradually melting away the snow of the winter. The ground was wet and green with dew and patches of ice. The soil was rich with water and flowers were in bloom. Hibernating animals were only just returning and the birds had already traveled back from the south. 

The morning was full of life. 

“You didn’t have to agree to the picnic,” you said in reply. You had carried a basket down with you. It was filled with loaves of honey-lavender bread, goat cheese, biscuits, and gooseberry preserves from the stores. Everything was laid out in front of you on top of the old sheet you put down. 

“I rarely get to see you anymore. You travel too much, darling,” Keira pouted. She crossed her arms over her chest. “I miss playing with your hair!” 

“No one is stopping you,” you invited. 

Keira moved behind you, her fingers gentle as they took strands into her hands and began braiding. Keira was good at this. Not just making you look nice but the way she worked soothed you. Her touch was calming. Earlier on in your friendship you thought she was bewitching you, the way a single moment with her made you feel at home. Over time you learned that it was simply because she was pleasant to be around. 

“It’s gotten so long,” she commented, plucking flowers and adding them to her braid. “It’ll take me all morning to get it looking decent.” 

“You can have me for as long as you want.” 

She placed a quick peck on your cheek. “Promise, darling?” 

You hummed in reply, “Promise.” 

[endiness]

yeah, so. just for a fact checking reminder: the rumor that the witcher writers hate the books was started by a writer who was fired for being emotionally and physically abusive. in what was a fairly blatant attempt to incite the fanbase against his ex-coworkers tbh. and this is what his former co-worker had to say about him:

also as it's kind of relevant: the same writer who was fired from the witcher was also recently fired a week before his latest project that he was showrunner for was about to premiere (and not "departed due to creative differences" or some other kind of pr spin but just straight up fired) and while there's no official information on why, the rumor is because he was "a nightmare to work with."

and just on the henry cavill side of things as far as him being some super massive, lore obsessed fan of the series goes... he not only did not know the books existed when he first pursued the role, but he actually thought the books were based off the games and, either way, he still never bothered to check them out.

"I met Lauren and that's when I learned [the games] were books."

"I did not know the games were based on the books, but after meeting Lauren, I did."

"I played the video games before I read the books. I thought the books were based upon the games because any time I saw a Witcher book, it was always game art on the cover. After meeting with Lauren, she told me about the books."

"I knew The Witcher from the games and then I met Lauren and Lauren told me that they were a series of books as well, which the books were based upon. I had no idea about that."

as of 2021, he's only read the series once in 2018 — which is the same time he found out they existed and that the games were based on them instead of the other way around. (he's also never played the dlc for tw3, jsyk.)

"I haven't read the full series in a while, since just before I got the role [in 2018], actually."

and as far as him just caring SO much about book accuracy goes... he fucked up geralt's characterization in s1 and made it book inaccurate by cutting his lines and either saying nothing or grunting instead.

"All the grunts, I either added or I didn't say anything and just grunted instead. It was often up to the other actors to go, 'I think he's not gonna say anything now.'"

and then come time for s2 press and suddenly he's just ~all about the books and he pushed SO hard for a more book accurate, verbose geralt in s2. and all while virtually never taking any responsibility for how he's the reason why geralt would just say nothing and grunt.

he also straight up lied about the whole situation and tried to act like geralt was always originally written with very little dialogue, which is not true.

LAUREN: In the first episode, when I originally wrote it, Geralt spoke a lot because that’s what he’s like in the books. People always think of Geralt as stoic, but in the books he talks nonstop. […] We immediately starting pulling back on that and by the time we shot the final episode, the script much more matches what’s onscreen because together we really learned what was working. In that way, we honored a lot of what’s in the books but also made sure it works for the guy that you see onscreen.

and tried to blame it on yennefer and ciri having their own storylines and being prominent, important characters:

"In Season 1, there wasn't really much of an opportunity for expansive dialogue which Geralt is known for — in the books, he's often known to monologue — because we had two original origin stories which were the center point of the show."

and tried to act like the lines he was cutting weren't even that important anyway so it didn't really matter.

JOEY BATEY: Henry likes to cut his lines, 'cause he's lazy. No, he literally just likes to cut them. He likes to do more up here [frames his face with his hands] and just with face and hmms and grunts. There's a lot of hmms, and so I often have to take a lot of his lines and turn it into a lot of my stuff so that the plot happens.

and just for some other book inaccurate things he's either fully or at least partially responsible for:

he had at least some hand in fucking up geralt and jaskier's friendship because he didn't want to "play it more directly like the books" and have them be all "hey, buddy!" with each other.

he cut geralt and triss even just platonically finding comfort in each other for a night in s2 — which is book canon.

he cut a geralt and yennefer sex scene in s2 because he didn't think that'd be in character of them. even though that absolutely would've been in character of them.

he didn't want to play geralt as struggling with fatherhood at all in s2 or having any conflict in geralt and ciri's relationship which had the domino effect of leading to eskel's death, yennefer's betrayal arc, and voleth meir being a season long villain.

and as far as the pr of him wanting books accuracy goes... he was actually just lowkey mad that he was co-lead with two women and that the show heavily focuses on women, y'know, like the books do.

"The toughest part for me was finding that balance between the showrunners’ vision and my love for the books, and trying to bring that Geralt to the showrunners’ vision."

"It’s important for me to have the character be three-dimensional and it’s tricky to do, as I was saying earlier, because there’s a certain vision and there’s a certain set, storyline and plot."

"There’s only so much space to provide the same character from the books within the showrunner’s vision."

"On season two, I wanted to bring as much of 'Book' Geralt into the show that Lauren's vision and that the plot would allow. That's a tricky thing to do, because the plot, as Lauren has said, is very centred around bringing women into the centre of The Witcher."

"Lauren’s vision was more of an ensemble piece than the first Witcher books. It’s driven a lot more by the characters of Yennefer and Cirilla."

also i'm too lazy to pull quotes for this, but if you look at any interview from the cast and crew (sans hc), like, it is obvious that the writers and the people working on the show do actually know and care about and like and understand the story and the source material. and just with lauren in particular, like, everyone in the cast (sans hc) has very positive things to say about her and her showrunning style and her willingness to be collaborative and hear them out on ideas they have about their characters and storylines and everything.

and as far as the mood on the set goes, i mean. there is the conspiracy theory that henry cavill was fired for being sexist and making it impossible for women to work with him which, js, has more evidence supporting it than the idea that he was fired or quit because he just cares about the source material SO MUCH.

also, js, but i personally think it says a lot that after s1 — even with all the world events going on — there was still a severe lack of behind the scenes content with the cast but come filming for s4 with liam at the helm as geralt and suddenly there's footage of a table read where the cast and crew all seem very happy and energetic and having a fun time with each other and that the show also hired an agency to do behind the scenes stuff for s4, too.

Let is be know that when I say "AMC Interview with the Vampire is everything Netflix The Witcher should have been" what I mean is "Iwtv is a good adaptation of a popular fantasy series that does take liberties in many places but at the end of the day it still stay true themes of the book, made by people who can't stop praising the book author (and it also looks like a really fun set to work at) while The Witcher missed the whole point of the series, the writers actually admited they didn't even like the books and the lead actor left the project after being told like a dozen of times "he is hard to work with" when all he did was pointing out that the script doesn't follow the book" but also "they actually made those cat eyes contacts lens work"

[fangirleaconmigo]

Hi, hope you're having a great day! I'm very glad you are so passionate about the books and are giving all those 'netflix only' fans, like myself, a chance for some deeper context and comparisons. You've talked some about the relationships Geralt and Yennefer have with Ciri and Dandelion. Is there a difference or a deeper relationship between Ciri and Dandelion in the books? Is he just her adopted father's friend or are they family in their own right? I've noticed the Netflix adaptation kind of makes a point of isolating Jaskier from all of Geralt's friends. No one seems to like him or respect him, if they can even stand him. It's very off putting. Then they hardly had the two interact so I'm worried it will be more of the same with his daughter, do you have any thoughts on that?

Hi Nonny! Thanks for the ask xo.

Yes, it’s a bit odd isn’t it? Jaskier tries to be friendly and he can’t seem to catch a break. I get, of course, that it’s a joke. It’s a really common type of running joke (common esp in sitcoms), where everyone is inexplicably mean to one person, and that’s it. That's the whole joke. (Like Jerry in Parks and Rec) I will admit that I literally do not get it. My sister will be laughing at stuff like that and it just does literally zero for my funny bone. I sort of just cringe.

But lots of people love it! And lots of people love it in TWN. Actually I read a Reddit comment where a person said that when Geralt punched Jaskier in S1, they laughed so hard they almost pee’ed themselves. (Paraphrased). And I have to be honest, with that type of humor. I just look at the screen and there's nothing. Not even a chuckle. Humor is just so damned subjective. And I don't get it. I would rather see nuanced characters and an amazing friendship in all its glory. But what can do you?

And with Jaskier, I think it's so interesting that in doing that with his character, they inadvertently make him such a tragically lonely figure. It is SO IRONIC. Of course in the books Dandelion annoys some people and charms other. He is loud and gregarious and funny and some people find him totally obnoxious and others find him extremely entertaining. But he is by far the most outgoing, extroverted, people loving character and probably has the most friends of anyone.

And yet somehow in the show, he is the most lonely one, in a way that feels kind of tragic! It's interesting! And for those who love angst, they are probably eating that up. You've got Jaskier playing Burn Butcher Burn, people cheering and laughing, while he dissociates and basically falls apart right in front of their eyes. And they just cheer.

Is there anything lonelier than being surrounded by people to whom you are invisible? People who see you as more of an object or clown?

And then if you take away all of his other friends, and make Geralt refuse to call him a friend for the first twenty years of their friendship, and you have somehow made the popular bard the most lonely character in the witcher world. (I think Yen is the most lonely in the books, because the sorceresses are such sharks to her. But in the show they are more of her friends)

But yeah. I don't think TWN meant to do that with Jaskier? I think they just thought it'd be funny? (total speculation) But here we are.

But I would very much like to see Jaskier be a fuller character, and more obviously to be a part of his beloved found family. I ADORED all of his scenes with Yen in S2. And I'd love to see more of his scenes written with the understanding of what he brings to the witcher universe. He is just a beating human heart of a loyal person who loves his found family. So let's see some more of that bond.

But you asked about Jaskier and Ciri in the books, and I've made that post here. XD

[asweetprologue]

Nili’s Benchmark Geraskier Fic Rec List

hey yall! I officially hit 750 followers (a few days ago, I blew past the benchmark without even realizing!), which is... insane. I truly can’t believe that so many people over the last year have enjoyed my presence in this fandom enough to continue to follow my work. you guys are so great and I love you all so much, so I decided to put together a gift for you!

this is a list of my favorite geraskier fics from the fandom, which I have been putting together over the last year or so. a few of these are big in the fandom, but a lot of them are smaller pieces that I feel deserve more attention! I have provided ao3 and tumblr links where I could find them, as well as ratings and summaries. Most of these are canon!verse because I’m not personally a big fan of modern au’s, but there will be a few of those scattered throughout as well. I’ve divided the fics into two sections: oneshots and multichapter. See the list below the cut!

Being in this fandom truly has gotten me through the pandemic in a big way and I have made so many good friends while here. thank you all for validating my weird obsession with these characters and enabling me in these trying times <3

Oneshots

all that was good, all that was fair (all that was me is gone) | M | 7517 | WARNING: Graphic Depictions Of Violence | @xdandelionxbloomx

Somewhere, deep in a forest, a man drags himself from his grave by sheer power of will. He lies gasping on the forest floor and does not know who or what he is. The world is wide and wonderful, though, and there is so much to see.

Or, Jaskier is so stubborn that he literally comes back from the dead.

Another fascinating addition to the mythology of the Witcher. Jaskier’s slow rediscovery of himself is so well done here. One I’ve come back to again and again. 

As Fast As Love Can Go | T | 9628 | @bygodstillam

There are Faeries in the Wood.

That's what everyone said, at least, not that there was any solid proof. Jaskier had tried, more than once, to find some. Just a hint somewhere, of a real story, of real magic. But all anyone seemed to have was stories.

Jaskier was determined to find proof. He wasn't expecting to find a witcher in the process.

Fascinating fic with some really interesting worldbuilding, and a fresh new take on True Love’s Kiss. Also with some great art by @hehearse!

beautiful, he stirs up still things | T | 2575 | @alittlebitmaybe

“You’re not asking me to dance,” says Geralt.

Jaskier turns his palm up on his knee, offering it. “I think you’ll find I am.”

Just them dancing. This is a lovely sort of pre-relationship dynamic. So soft.

Dialogue Prompt | NR | 2932 | @reinvent-and-believe

Dialogue Prompt 48: “You make me want things I can’t have.” Wordless I-love-you 50: buying them a special treat when you go out shopping

Geralt gets Jaskier a gift, which prompts some confessions.

Even a small love | E | 22,272 | WARNING: Rape/Non-Con 

“Well,” Jaskier replies distractedly. “Lots of things want to strangle you.”

“You don’t.”

It isn’t a particularly troublesome accusation, or even necessarily an accusation at all.

This is one I read early on in the fandom, and it really stuck with me. The dynamic between Jaskier and Geralt is perfect, and the misunderstandings between them feel so realistic. The non-con is not extreme, but do mind the warnings. 

For the Space of a Heartbeat | T | 2021 | @drowningbydegrees

As it turns out, falling into bed with your very best friend who you are privately very much in love with isn't nearly so nerve wracking as waking up with them the morning after.

Just sweet, morning after discussions. I love to see them talking for once.

Greensleeves | T | 10,414 | @rebrandedbard

When Geralt crosses paths with Jaskier in the spring, the world is dressed in green. Quite literally. Everyone everywhere is wearing green, and it all comes down to a song Jaskier has written that, to his mortification, has become popular throughout the Continent. It's torment, being forced to preform the song over and over again and have his heart broken anew. But who is this Lady Greensleeves the people say Jaskier is so maddeningly, heartbrokenly in love with? At the baron's wedding party, Geralt is determined to find out.

This is one of my personal faves - there’s just something about Jaskier’s feelings being put on blast while Geralt remains totally oblivious that I think is so very them. And the resolution at the end is delightful.

I Don’t Wanna Fall (If It’s Not In Love) | E | 13,902 | @writinglizards

The first time it's out of desperation. Things get rapidly out of hand from there.

OR the building of a relationship through mutual wank sessions.

I love everything Ashley writes, but this one was the first fic I read by her and it still has a warm place in my heart. I also highly recommend It’s Been A While (makes me cry every time) and Tell Me Honestly

Like a Storm, Like a Flood | T | 1065 | @valdomarx

Jaskier is leaving for the winter, and Geralt can't bear the thought of not seeing him for months.

It was soooo hard to pick only one fic by George, but this one is so soft and sweet and yearning I just had to go with it. This is really just about Geralt finally hitting a breaking point and saying enough is enough.

one flesh | E | 10,763 | WARNING: MCD 

“Well, then. I’m a ghost.” Jaskier spread his arms grandly. Geralt held his gaze for a moment, then dropped his head and laughed. Jaskier put his hands on his hips. “Do fill me in on what’s so funny.” It wasn’t funny. It was just so - ridiculous, the things Geralt’s fucked up brain would invent. This had to be the last nail in the sanity coffin, it just had to be.

Or: Jaskier is a ghost, and Geralt is a mess.

Jaskier dies and comes back as a ghost to haunt Geralt into taking care of himself. Geralt does not handle this gracefully. This fic is so sad and heartbreaking, but the ending is so sweet.

to render it transparent | E | 23,901

Geralt wakes up warm, peaceful, and utterly content, which is how he knows that something is severely wrong.

Sigh. This fic. This is a time travel fic - Geralt ends up in the future living with Jaskier on the coast, just after the mountain. It’s slow and beautiful and extremely bittersweet, all about how we choose to love people despite how much it can hurt us.

With All the Continent A Stage | M | 4745 | @greyduckgreygoose

Later, Geralt learned that the play was four hours long. Four hours long. It didn’t feel like it. Most of it passed by in a fever dream of ominous music, dance-fighting and dryads in gossamer leaves, swinging from hoops attached to the ceiling. Yennefer made an appearance, played by Priscilla in a glittering negligee. She sang a song to Geralt about putting him “Under Her Spell”, and they had a sensual dance number which was made a little strange by a sickened Jaskier (played by Jaskier) coughing loudly in the background.

(Jaskier invites Geralt to a musical production inspired by his own life.)

Jaskier basically writes Geralt a love letter in the form of a four hour long play. Geralt is an idiot about it.

Multi-Chapter Fics

A Lover’s Lament | M | 25,364 | @somedrunkpirate

So,” Jaskier begins, as casually as he can, “you are telling me, that in theory, if I were to be in love with someone — anyone — that person could well be in terrible danger?”

Of all terrible and ridiculous things that have threatened Geralt’s safety, Jaskier’d never thought that loving him might be what will get him killed.

I honestly can’t count the number of times I’ve read this fic. The monster is so interesting, and the mythos of it fits seamlessly into the world of the Witcher in my mind. Jaskier being so afraid that his feelings are going to put Geralt at risk, clearly unable to see that Geralt is going through the exact same thing. I think about the scene with them looking at each other almost daily. 

A Pair of Gloves, the Scent of Roses | M | 24,134 | WARNING: Graphic Depictions of Violence

In the bustling days before the Midsummer festival, Geralt is sent into the countryside to deal with a monster - with Jaskier once again by his side. But the bard has not forgiven him, and while he's not hiding his contempt for the Witcher, he is recalcitrant about revealing his true motives for joining him. As the hunt turns into a desperate mission to save an innocent man and the monster is not what is seems to be, Geralt learns a few new things about his old friend and decides to finally attempt to mend the rift between them...

This is one of my favorite’s in the fandom - it feels so believable, the world is so rich and the oc’s are convincing and charming. Geralt and Jaskier feel so honest here, stumbling around each other but still drawn together. Beautiful beautiful beautiful

Bearing the will of the flower | NR | 11,449 

The way Jaskier sees it, his hobby of following a witcher around was always pretty likely to get him killed.

The fact that it's happening now because the witcher in question doesn't love him, he thinks as he coughs up crumpled flowers, hardly makes a difference.

My favorite hanahaki fic in the fandom. I’m such a sucker for these, and these two idiots being so incapable of talking about their feelings really makes them prime candidates. 

Food of Love | T | 22,488 | @wallatile-qvibbler

I brought a dead princess back to life through the power of song is the kind of thing that would have got an eyebrow raise even from the stone-faced Geralt of Rivia, so it's a good thing he and Geralt will probably never see each other again.

(or: the one where Jaskier channels magic through his songs, and it almost never goes as expected.)

This is a Jaskier and Renfri centric fic, which wasn’t something I knew I wanted until I read this. Jaskier is a bard which in this AU comes with magical powers, but it feels so well integrated into the universe that I wish it was just... how the Witcher is. Renfri is so good here, and even though Jaskier and Geralt barely even interact you can feel the tension and love between them. Cannot recommend highly enough.

friends and allies of the witcher | T | 10,312 | @theamazingbard

Yennefer crawls over to her newest cellmate. They’re curled up on their side. Breathing, but only just. She’s not sure what she’s hoping for when she turns them over. Still isn’t when she sees that it is indeed Jaskier.

“Shit."

Yennefer and Jaskier each suffer in more ways than one at the hands of Nilfgaard.

Yennefer and Jaskier get capture by Nilfgaard and tossed into a cell together. Exactly what I want out of season 2 honestly. Their interactions are gold.

I’d Be the Choiceless Hope | E | 45,188 | WARNING: Rape/Non-Con | @lesdemonium

As a baby, Jaskier was visited by a fae, who gifted Jaskier's mother with Jaskier's obedience. As Jaskier grew older, the "gift" became more of a curse.

You know I’m not gonna make a rec list without listing Zoe’s Ella Enchanted au. Need I say more?

Silver and Copper | M | 56,139 | WARNING: Graphic Depictions of Violence | @kaer-cuan

Geralt is just supposed to pass through the quiet Lettenhove area. He's not anticipating being begged by its people to help save their viscount from a curse that keeps him from daylight. Lord Jaskier, they call him, and he's likely dying.

As Geralt struggles to untangle the ugly web of history that has lead to the increasingly complicated curse, he finds himself spending more and more time with the strange young viscount and wondering just what he might have been before the curse, and who he might be after. But things are not always as they seem, and as the curse tightens its grip on Jaskier, Geralt is forced to face the fear of failing yet another person whose choices were stolen from them.

Or-

Jaskier is kept from becoming a bard. Geralt finds him anyway.

This is a fic that haunts me. It’s very scary in parts, and mind the tags - there are some very heavy themes here. But it’s beautiful and touching, and Jaskier feels very true to himself even though his origin is so different.

we could be married (and then we'd be happy) | E | 50,222 | @a-kind-of-merry-war

Jaskier reached into his pocket, fingers grasping around the little box. He pulled it out with what he hoped was a romantic flourish, flipping it open to reveal the simple gold band inside. “Geralt,” he said, confidently, cooly, like this wasn’t terrifying, “Will you marry me?”

Geralt and Jaskier fake marriage proposals to get free deserts and shit but it goes tits up when Vesemir catches them in the act. Not knowing how to fess up, they go along with it for a while, which is hell because they’re both pining like mad. As I said, I don’t love modern au’s, but it’s merry so of course this one had to end up on my list.

~

And that’s it! 20 fics for you, and hopefully you can all find one or two you haven’t read before. There are a lot of people and fics that I didn’t include in this list only because I was trying to not put a million down (which I could). I highly recommend anything by @wherethewordsare, @julek, @contemplativepancakes, @witcher-and-his-bard, and @inber, as well as those linked to fics above, and I’m sure there are others I forgot to mention. Yall have truly made being in this fandom worthwhile <3

[falcor-thee-luck-dragon]

Interviews - Henry Cavill x wife/actress reader

Summary: You and Henry have been married for a couple years now, and when you’re both part of the Witcher cast, fun interviews are to be had.

Warning: nothing but a good time, btw I’ve never written anything like this so I hope it’s good enough that I might feel motivated to write more

-Readers Witcher character is loosely based off my Geralt fic from here (just a little self promotion), but in this case you play a full vampire in this Witcher universe

The days have been long and grueling, filming hours upon hours of stunts and regular acting had taken its toll. Not to mention the countless times in hair and make up paired with costume changes and traveling to film on certain locations.

To say being apart of Netflix’s The Witcher was full of tiring days and some accidental bruises would be a huge understatement. But none of that mattered, nor did you bother to complain when through the thick and thin of it all did you have Henry with you along the way. And your favorite big slobbery bear, Kal whenever he was allowed on set.

Fortunately for you in the beginning of all the craziness, the casting and writers had wanted you specifically for the part of Y/C/N in the new series before Henry even auditioned for the role of Geralt, that was soon given to him after you accepted your fresh role of vampiric heroine.

It was ironically strange in a good way, you had watched your dork of a husband play the Witcher: Wild Hunt a few times before, eventually learning of what Geralt of Rivia was, who Y/C/N was in the story, who Yennefer and Ciri were, Tris and even Jaskier.

Who would have thought that you’d finally get to snag a role side by side with Henry in quite literally one of the most fantastic shows you’ve ever heard of. You didn’t even need to see the show yet to know how well it was most likely to be reviewed. Being a key character in the grand storyline was enough to convince you of how amazing it would most certainly turn out in the finished product.

And after all was said and done, you couldn’t believe how well loved and popular the show truly became in the following months after shooting and its eventual release onto Netflix. The after parties and cast celebrations truly made you blessedly grateful for pulling through to the vary end.

Then again you had your mans Henry by your side every step of the way. He was your rock and you were most definitely his. You know life on set would have been far less entertaining and dreadfully long if not for the lovely company of your dear Witcher, Henry. And so far after the fact, you and a good portion of the cast have been placed in random interviews for the majority of the day.

Reason being, The Witcher has at long last finally premiered and as per usual the people and media live for those cast interviews that always reveal some interesting events. So far this morning you’ve done some interviews with Anya that have gone perfectly fine since the two of you seem to click so well.

Also it helps ease the anxiety of your fellow newer cast mates to the world of continuous interviews with an experienced veteran actor like yourself, who’s gone round the ring more times then you can count. Though you can’t help but wonder how Henry’s doing, considering you’ve been separated since the sessions began at 10am, you’ve had lunch and now it’s about 1 in the afternoon with more hours to go.

Luckily for you, you’ve just been informed of another interview with the man of the hour himself. Saying your goodbyes and well wishes to your fellow cast mates, you stand and follow the guide into the advised place. Aka some really nice hotel room that’s been done up real nice for efficient interviewing, complete with the Witcher insignia on a large background poster and three chairs that happen to look rather comfy.

The camera and sound people nod in acknowledgment as you walk in, you nod back no doubt making their day with your friendliness and adorable smile that quite literally lights up a room. Soon you spot the bubbly yet nervous interviewee who instantly welcomes you into her space like you’re an old friend.

You sit, a bit confused as to where your partner happens to be at the moment, the interviewer, Lauren makes small talk before a door opens and her big bright doe eyes go wide in nervous excitement. A telling smile upon her face as she shifts in her chair before looking back to you again with a happy grin.

Henry says a quick hello to the behind the scenes crew before waving to Lauren, you smirk while watching him get comfortable next to you, “Well, well, well. Get lost on your way up, you know they have guides for a reason.” You tease as he chuckles at your humorous jab, relieved to see you again after a couple hours apart.

“Traffic.” He quips with a shrug.

“Uh huh.” You mutter with a shake of your head before drawing your attention back to Laura, “Can’t take him anywhere I swear, he does this all the time.”

She laughs as Henry pretends to gasp at your teasing, you chuckle along with them before she finally collects herself, “Well, welcome back to London. It’s fantastic to have you both in town once again, and your big beautiful faces all over Leicester Square.”

You both laugh, “Right.” Says Henry, “I guess we do look pretty cool.”

“Hell yeah, I mean where else can I see myself with a giant sword on a building? And anyways look at this beautiful mug,” You say gently squeezing Henry’s cheeks in your hand, “he’s literally killing it out there.” They laugh as you give Hen another playful squeeze before letting go and setting your arm against the chairs cushioned armrest. 

“Alight let’s start.” She says enthusiastically before glancing down at her cards then back up to you and Henry. Then into one of the two the cameras, “Hi I’m Lauren from Entertainment Weekly and today we’re here with the two stars of Netflix’s The Witcher.” She says enthusiastically while giving a nod to you two, indicating that the camera is now focused on you both, “Henry Cavill and Y/N Cavill.”

You both smile in acknowledgment as Henry gives a slight nod, “How you doing?”

“I’m great,” She beams, “So, I’ll get right into it, what do you like most about the story? What really drew you into the script that made you say, yes this is going to be awesome?”

Slapping a hand against Henry’s muscular leg, you hum, “I’ll let Hen take this one he’s a real expert on the linguistics of the whole show.”

“Thanks Y/N/N.” Replies Henry, bemused that you’re making him take the first question.

You nod to him knowingly with a smirk, “Of course.” Knowing how much he loves to talk about the show and also because you’d rather have him use his energy to talk about it then do that yourself. Priorities, right, though in your defense it’s been a long day.

“Well I absolutely love the games and the books themselves are phenomenal works of literature.” He explains, his face glowing with that usual glimmer of excitement in his eyes, “The story and the world of the Witcher is just so rich and full of potential that when I signed on for the show, I immediately knew it would be amazing, no doubt.”

You lean into the arm of you chair, “And of course I was there so that’s always a bonus.”

“That too.” He smiles adorably, “That too of course.”

Lauren smiles, “Great. So, what was it like working together, how was it having your characters interact with one another?”

You smile, setting a hand against Henry’s forearm, “This guy right here.” You deadpan before waving him off dramatically, “So annoying, my god he whined all the time and he was such a drama queen dear lord so ugh....” You start cackling before you can even finish the sentence causing Henry to loose it as well and with that the interviewer.

Shaking your head you rest your hand against his shoulder, “I joke, he was a gem to work with as usual...I mean I feel incredibly blessed to be able to act alongside my husband for months and months every single day. It’s a rarity in this line of work and I’m grateful to have shared this experience...and I guess more so this whole adventure with him as well.”

The interviewer aww’s as Henry tilts his head to lean into your hand that’s still resting atop his shoulder before pulling away just as quickly, the intimate sentiment not going unnoticed by you or Lauren who looks to be enjoying your loving yet calm energy with one another. “That’s so sweet, what about you Henry?”

“Oh yes absolutely,” Agrees Henry to your recent statement, “not only did I have her by my side through it all but the dynamic of our characters interacting together was so fun to shoot. I think the audience will really be able to see their relationship grow on screen into something strong and beautiful like in the books.”

Slow clapping you give him a curt nod of approval, “Well said.”

Lauren smirks, “Seems like it. Well, I was able to catch the premier yesterday and I gotta say...it was fantastic! I couldn’t believe how diffident the two of you looked from how you are now.” She gushes enthusiastically.

The corners of Henry’s lips curl into a proud smile for the fellow crew of the Witcher’s, “Oh that’s great then, honestly we gotta give all the props to the costume and makeup team, they’re so talented and know how to make us look like real badasses.” He adds.

You nod in agreement before grinning at a positive memory of your first interaction with Henry as Geralt, “Oh for sure, I remember during the early stages of production when our characters met each other for the first time, before this we came to set together but went separate ways to shoot our own stuff in the meantime so I never got a real look at him.” You recall with a bright smile as Henry watches your every move, beaming just the same.

“It was so funny, I was in the tent with Freya Allen, the wonderful girl who plays Ciri, and then suddenly her eyes got all big and nervous and I was like, that’s not me right? Something weird didn’t just happen with my costume? And then I turned around to find this man, wig on, face a mess, and his eyes looked so fearsome and different...it was a bit startling.” You say with a chuckle, “I clearly wasn’t expecting to see Geralt right then and there. He just looked so unlike Henry.”

“Yeah, I was almost hurt.” Laughs Henry, “She had to like squint and make sure it was me.”

Rolling your eyes, you shrug, “He had some real creepy looking colored contacts, yunno?”

Henry fake scoffs, “You’re one to talk, I mean when I first say her, Y/N’s eyes were red and she had fake blood spattered all over her face and shirt. Oh, and not to mention those fangs they put on your teeth...we probably traumatized poor Freya that day.”

“Oh shit you’re right!” You exclaim with a snort of concealed laughter, “God I completely forgot about how I looked...now since I think about it, I did that a lot too. I would just walk up to people and be completely oblivious as to what kind of nightmare I looked like, honestly I might have scared one of our producers a couple of times.” You add with a half nervous laugh, it’s true, you did scare some of the crew unintentionally. Most of the time.

Lauren lightly chuckles, “That sounds like you were quite the sight to see then.” She says before glancing back down at her notes, “Alright I have’ta ask, is there anything that you two took home with you from set?”

“Besides Henry every night,” He holds back a laugh while covering his mouth as you nonchalantly continue, “Uh, yes actually I got to take home Y/C/N’s wolf ring that I loved so much and just thought was the coolist thing ever and....uh, I might have stolen some socks too.”

“So that’s why after filming the amount of socks of yours I had to fold increased?” Wonders Henry with a surprised snort of realization.

Turning your head to give him a “no shit” kinda look, you look back at Lauren, pointing your thumb at Henry, “Master sleuth right here, but hey, he folds my laundry.”

“Aw that’s great.” Adds Lauren with a smile before turning her attention to Henry, “What about you Henry? Take anything from set?”

“More then Y/N did actually...”

“He just about took the whole makeup trailer most nights, I swear.”

Henry chuckles, “That. Is true.” He agrees with a nod, “Interesting enough, at home I’ve got Geralt’s armor hung up in our living room and a multitude of other nicknacks that I’ve collected during filming.” He adds, glancing over to you, “So uh, yeah, we were fairly lucky to be able to snag what we could.”

Lauren smiles, absentmindedly shuffling her cards, “That’s awesome to have such special memorabilia, you guys really are fortunate.” She adds before reading off from another card, “Alright you two, care to play a game called guess the image? Witcher style.”

Your face perks up at this, you’re a sucker for interview games and Henry knows it, “Are you reading my mind or something, I have been waiting all day for someone to ask about playing a game.” You gush rather enthusiastically. 

He smiles at your adorableness and how excited you’ve just become, Lauren grins, happy that her suggestion has been so well received, “Okay so how it works is, I’ll show you an image on my iPad and then you have to guess who or what I’m showing you.”

“Oh, cool I’ve heard of this,” You reply, turning to Henry with a smirk, “Loser has to clean Kal’s yard poop for a week.”

Rolling his gorgeous blue eyes he chuckles, “You’re on.”

“Alright, the stakes are high, you two ready?” Beams Lauren, holding her iPad to her chest as she awaits an answer.

“Yes, I’m ready to kick his ass.” You quip, leaning an arm against your chair while Henry does about the same, though he does his best to contain his laughter.

“Okay, first image.” She holds up the device to show some sort of weird golden thing, it’s shiny and hard, worst part is that you’re not entirely sure what the hell it could be.

Sensing your confusion Henry nudges your shoulder, though you ignore it before he smartly answers, “Oh, is that...Renfri’s brooch?” Little shit knows exactly what that is, of course he does.

Lauren claps, “Correct.” Zooming out of the image to show the full picture of the golden brooch, “Right on, that’s one point for Mr. Cavill.”

You scoff playfully, “Beginners luck.” While Henry side eyes you with a humorous grin upon his plush lips, he nudges your arm, “I’m going to really enjoy not cleaning up Kal’s grass turds for awhile.” He mutters lightheartedly, though you know deep down he’s being serious, no way is he going to win this, you think. You won’t have it, hopefully the next few pictures aren’t as difficult, Kal duty is not fun by any means.

“Shut up.” You grumble with a dismissive wave of your hand, though just teasing of course.

“Okay next image.” This time the blurred photo looks much more familiar, soon it clicks as to what the obscured blurriness actually is, yes!

“Got it! Anya’s er I guess Yennefer’s dress from the fight at Sodden.” Lauren giggles, zooming the image out to reveal Yennefer in her tasseled blue and purple dress from the battle at Sodden Hill. “I’m amazing I know.” You boast at Henry with a casual little bow in your seat.

“It’s the second question.” He deadpans, eyes crinkling in amusement as you shake your head at him.

“Pffff get outta here.” You mutter back, gently pushing his arm off of your chairs armrest and setting yours in its place while he gives you a fake shocked expression.

In turn you can’t help the smile that tugs at the corner of your lips, so instead of saying some sassy remark that would no doubt get a reaction out of him, you turn your attention back over to Lauren who’s looking over her notes again.

“Fantastic,” She says, glancing back up at you and Henry, “you’re both tied with one point each. Alright, anyone know what this is?” She asks showing something red and fuzzy, a bit of dirty skin showing from one corner but with The Witcher this bloody image could literally be anything.

The both of you squint, puzzled as to what this could be, “Y/N you got any ideas.” Wonders Henry, brows furrowed as his face contorts into deep concentrated thought.

Raising a brow, you hum, “If I knew I wouldn’t tell you.”

“Fair point.” He chuckles.

Lauren smiles, “Any guesses?”

 After a few concentrated moments, Henry shrugs in defeat,  “I’m stumped.” He admits as you study the image harder, mind racing to put the pieces together as to what the hell you’re looking at.

“No, I think I might know this....erm is it...me?” You wonder, voice raising in question, hoping to be correct about this or face the teasing of Henry.

Lauren quickly zooms out of the obscured image, “It is!” She says excitedly, revealing the picture of you from your characters debut in episode 2 where you save a girl from a werewolf, your mouth is covered in blood and so is most of your costumes chest area and left arm from the struggle. Not to mention the make-up teams fun 20 minutes of throwing fake sticky blood all over you to get the right look for the taxing scene.

You grimace a bit, “Oh god that was quite the day on set,” You recall with a half smile, “I was doing stunts all day covered in that red syrupy dye, I think it took a week to get out of my skin.”

Henry suddenly snorts with laughter, “Right! That reminds me, I thought Kal had gotten cut or something, it was just Y/N who had hugged him not realizing she still had some fake blood on her arm.”

“Jeez that’s right, I felt so bad, but I couldn’t stop laughing once we realized it was just me.”

Lauren grins, excited to hear some hidden information about little things that happens behind the scenes, “Oh wow that must have been a sight, alright Henry, Y/N’s taken the lead with a two to one score.” She says as you playfully nudge his strong shoulder. “Second to last image, what is this?”

Without missing a single beat Henry replies, “Jaskier.”

Squinting at the image you lean closer to the iPad, “How the hell do you see Jaskier?”

Smiling the interviewer zooms out to reveal the bards full outfit from the banquet scene, though he’s in the background of a fight between Geralt and some Cintran knights. “Right on!” She exclaims as you lean back into your seat dumbfounded, shoulder flush against Henry’s as he clutches your arm and squeezes it affectionately.

Ignoring his silent show of victory you shrug, “And they say he’s just another pretty face,” Earning a laugh from Lauren and some of the crew as you smirk at the camera, face them shifting to apologetic, “also I’m so sorry Joey you beautiful bastard apparently I’m blind. Uh, we don’t have to dwell on it, Lauren whatcha got?”

“You guys are both tied with two points each, last chance to win.” She replies before glancing down at her iPad, “Alright, what is this?” She asks, her iPad showing that of fuzzy bright colors, with a small corner smear of dull white that clearly wouldn’t make much sense to the untrained eye.

Smirking you glance at a puzzled Henry before sitting up in your seat, feeling rather good about yourself, “Would that happen to be, Hen in Stregobor’s illusion?” You answer with, though sounding a bit as a question considering you aren’t entirely confident as to what image this is.

Lauren’s brows raise in surprise, “Henry, looks like we have a winner. Y/N you are correct.” She beams, enlarging the image to reveal Geralt’s side profile as he talks to the old wizard while the background stays colorful and shrouded in various arrays of sunlight..

Shaking your fist victoriously in the air you give a couple enthusiastic whoop whoops while Henry simply takes it like a champ, “Have fun cleaning up Karl’s monster turds, cause this lucky lady doesn’t have to.” You boast as Henry and the crew laugh.

“Well that was something,” Beams Lauren, “I’m so glad to have chatted for a bit about your guys’ amazing new series, and maybe ended a relationship in the process.” She says jokingly as both you and Henry chuckle.

Patting his thigh affectionately, you smirk, “He’s a tough old bear, but yeah, it was awesome having you talk to us.”

“Yes, take care now.” Adds Henry while the interviewer Lauren stands, saying her goodbyes as she goes to exit the room.

The camera crew take a small break to adjust things and whatnot as you and Henry wait patiently for the next interviewer. He turns, an adorable smile pulling at his lips while you pretend to ignore his fiery gaze. “Well that went pretty well, minus the fact that I’m on Kal poop duty for a week...but uh...” He leans in close to you now, “I missed you all morning.”

Breaking out into a smile you raise a brow, “Boring without me huh?”

“Always.”

You casually shrug, “I figured as much. Don’t worry, we have a hotel all to ourselves tonight.” Your brows wiggle suggestively causing your blue eyed lover to shake his head with amusement.

“Say it louder next time.” He jokes.

Side eyeing the oblivious crew you begin to speak a couple octaves louder, “Henry I can’t wait to fu..” Suddenly his hand presses against your mouth before you’re able to call any attention to yourself. He gives you a warning look before slowly pulling his hand from your mouth.

You grin mischievously, “I wasn’t gonna say that...”

“Sure Y/N,” He mutters in your ear as a new interviewer walks into the room and finds their chair, “and I’m wasn’t going to make you scream tonight.”

Your brows raise in surprise and admittedly slight arousal at his choice of wording in this room of all places. Eyeing him up, face still showing surprise, you finally break out into a satisfied smirk. “You know what? I think you should consider changing your offer.”

He thinks deeply for a moment, though you know he’s only pretending to get you riled up, “Hrmm...maybe, possibly, should I? Should we? You are my co-star after all, that wouldn’t be very professional now would it Y/N?” He states with a shit eating grin, all done while the crew and interviewer get ready, minding their business and completely unaware to yourself and Henry’s teasing.

Scoffing playfully you lightly swat his arm, “We are way past being professional.”

He chuckles, looking from you to the rest of the room, “Oh, they have no idea.”

[jaskierswolf]

Four Seasons

Summary: Jaskier is the god of winter and he gets invited to the four seasons ball. A formal celebration held by the the gods. This is finally the moment that Geralt realises just what Jaskier the bard really is.

Rated: T

Length 1.8k

CW: Jaskier wears a dress, brief mention of gods being genderfluid

Based of this art by @little-piece-of-tamlin. Another @thewitcherbog special!

________

As far as Geralt was aware, Jaskier was just a normal, very human bard. Jaskier had never said as such but people made assumptions, and he was happy to let people go about their day and think whatever made them most comfortable. Most people would be uncomfortable in the presence of a god, or they'd bow down, grovel at his feet, which whilst fun for a short period of time, got horrendously dull very quickly. He was a free spirit, especially during the summer months. Winter was a busier affair but Geralt was always tucked away in Kaer Morhen so never noticed Jaskier’s more immortal side during the coldest time of the year.

Geralt was about to get the shock of his lifetime.

It wasn’t as if Jaskier had planned it but the invitation had come in from Priscilla in the spring and he couldn’t just ignore it. The Four Seasons ball only happened once a century and it had completely slipped Jaskier’s mind, but he wouldn’t just abandon Geralt. The poor witcher might have thought he was dead if he hadn’t turned up at their unofficially agreed meeting place. So Geralt would just have to join Jaskier for the ball, and after that there would be no hiding. He was a guest of honour and gods and mortals alike would bask in the magic of the changing seasons. Most mortals wouldn’t remember the ball afterwards, the magic too powerful for their tiny little brains to comprehend, but those blessed by a god’s favour could remember.

And of course, Jaskier had blessed Geralt. One could not hold a god’s heart and not be blessed.

“You’re quiet,” Geralt grumbled as they made their way up to the rooms Jaskier had secured for them.

“I received an invitation to a party. I was hoping that you might come with me,” Jaskier stammered, feeling the frost creeping through his veins as it always did when his emotions started to get the better of him. He could melt snow and ice with a simple smile, but when he got anxious, things started to get a little frosty. The air temperature outside the tavern had dropped considerably since they’d arrived, but he doubted anyone had really noticed. It was late in the day and the change could be blamed on the setting of the sun.

“Already? Whose partner did you bed this time, bard?”

“Oh haha, very funny!” Jaskier scoffed, ignoring the frost glistening on the windows of their room when they stepped inside. Deep down he knew he needed to get a grip. Pris would be pissed off if he ruined her spring thaw with his own emotions, his poor sister would have to work even harder to counteract the effects of his magic, but it was always more difficult to rein in his magic in the spring. It was still strong from the winter months, and there was an adjustment period.

Even still, the snowfall last summer after the blasted dragon hunt had all three of his siblings up in arms against him. Valdo had to trigger autumn early and the whole harvest had been a mess.

He really should just tell Geralt he loved him and deal with the consequences, but… well… it had been a long time since he had loved like this and he still nursed the heartbreak.

“Jaskier?” Geralt said, snapping him from his thoughts. “What’s wrong?”

He blinked, focussing back into the room. He meant to say “nothing” or something along those lines. Something harmless and easy.

What fell from his lips was another thing entirely.

“I love you, oh bollocks!” Jaskier blurted, clapping a hand over his mouth.

“What the fuck?”

“I’m sorry!”

“No, I mean… Jaskier,” Geralt gestured to the room, there was a snow flurry above them and the windows were completely iced over. He desperately tried to think happy thoughts, the warm golden glow of Geralt’s eyes. The soft growl of his voice whenever Jaskier did something stupid that would get any mortal killed. Even if Geralt never loved him back, the thought of his witcher was enough to soothe his panic. With one last deep breath and a flick of his wrist, the snow was gone, “What the fuck?”

“Oh fuck, Pris is going to kill me,” Jaskier whined. “I- umm…”

Geralt pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed, one hand was holding his medallion and he just looked… well, done? Shit. Fucking cock balls.

“Explain, bard.”

“I love you? Quite hopelessly, I’m afraid,” Jaskier smiled sheepishly, his tongue flicking out to flick his lips, a nervous habit that he’d never quite overcome. “But!” he announced with false bravado, “that’s neither here nor there, it’ll pass. No need to worry about me, witcher.”

“And the snow?”

“Oooh yeah that.”

“Yeah, that.”

“Well, there’s a chance that I might be a god, hypothetically speaking of course. I’ve always favoured the winter months,” Jaskier admitted, flexing his fingers and pulling at his lute strap.

“You hate winter,” Geralt growled, still painfully ignoring Jaskier’s love confession but that was fine. “You always spend the winter in that cushy academy of yours.”

“Not strictly true,” Jaskier sighed, “but are you coming to my ball or not, witcher? My sister has invited us both, apparently I don’t shut up about you, probably part of the being in love thing.”

“No, you just don’t shut up.”

“Rude! Fine, be that way, Geralt. I’ll go alone,” Jaskier huffed, pouting with his whole body in a way that he knew Geralt always fell for. “It’s a shame, I had a perfect outfit planned. Gods don’t play by your rules of gender, and oh you should see me in a dress, I look absolutely divine, quite literally in fact.”

“If I come with you, will you be quiet?” Geralt sighed.

“Now, now, we both know I can’t promise that.”

Geralt groaned before slumping onto the bed, the only bed, and it took Jaskier another half an hour to get Geralt ready for the ball. It helped that he could use his magic now that Geralt knew, but the witcher still fought Jaskier on the pale blue doublet that would match Jaskier’s dress perfectly. No man, mortal or otherwise, could fight Jaskier’s eye for fashion and eventually Geralt gave in. It helped when Jaskier reminded the witcher there would be no need for armour in the presence of gods, there was no monster they couldn’t best, and so reluctantly Geralt left his worn out witcher armour on the bed, and let Jaskier dress him.

“Did you mean it?” Geralt muttered.

“Mean what?” Jaskier asked, cocking his head as his magic weaved through the fabric, subtly marking the witcher as his, no other god could claim Geralt if Jaskier already had, and he just didn’t trust his brother, not after the Countess de Stael.

“You love me?”

“With all my heart and soul, darling,” Jaskier admitted softly, his fingers freezing on the collar of Geralt’s doublet, now printed with buttercups. If one were to look closely they would see the tiny little snowflakes that made up the design, “but I- I understand if you don’t feel the same. I didn’t- I didn’t mean to tell you.”

“Hmm.”

“Is that alright, Geralt?”

“Yes. I- shit,” the witcher growled, “It’s not easy for me, witcher don’t-”

“Oh fuck off,” Jaskier snapped. “ Don’t you fucking dare, Geralt. Witchers don’t feel. Whatever whoreson told you that-”

“I know. I know, but you got hurt, because of me, and seeing you lying there in Yennefer’s bed. I thought I’d lost you,” Geralt snapped, his golden eyes burning with fire.

“And that was the day I lost you… to her,” Jaskier sighed, “I was never in real harm. The djinn magic just hurt this body, and I’m rather fond of this one, but I would have survived.”

“You didn’t lose me, Jaskier. Yennefer, she’s, she’s less fragile, and the wish, my wish,” Geralt shook his head.

“Ah yes, you bound yourself to her, my poor aunt, you call her Destiny, was not impressed with that one, but never mind, dear heart, your destiny is set now,” Jaskier pressed a kiss to Geralt’s cheek. “Of course, I could undo it. Djinn’s magic has nothing on mine, but the bond between you and Yennefer means nothing. It is a tie, not a love potion. I know you love her, Geralt.”

“I love you, Jaskier,” Geralt said all too quickly, and Jaskier froze, his heart racing in his chest and the world spinning around him in a blur. “It was easier to pretend that I didn’t.”

“Oh.”

“Yes.”

“Oh fuck,” Jaskier cried out, whisps of frost dancing through the air around them. “You- you love me?”

“Yes, Jaskier,” Geralt repeated, rolling his eyes and shooting Jaskier a fond smile. “I love you.”

Jaskier beamed, and with a flick of his wrist his doublet and breeches melted away into a beautiful icy blue gown. The fabric was cold against his skin, a mesh of snowflakes so thin that the pale blue fabric was sheer. He left his arms free of sleeves, and winked as he saw Geralt’s eyes go wide as he took in the muscles that Jaskier usually hid under his clothes. He thought about taking on a more traditionally female form to fill out the cleavage in the dress, but he rather liked the way Geralt was looking at him with a dark hunger in his eyes. As he stepped forwards his boots shifted into elegant high heels, a dark navy blue with thin straps around his ankles.

“Jask,” Geralt breathed, “You look…”

Jaskier winked at his witcher, cupping his cheek with his hand. “There, now we match.”

“You’re taller than me.”

With a giggle, Jaskier nodded, looking down at Geralt for the first time in their acquaintance. They’d always been similar in height, but Jaskier’s shoes gave him the edge now. “Well, you are my guest for the evening, and no mortal should rise above their immortal, it goes against court etiquette.”

The witcher scoffed, “When have you ever given a shit about etiquette?”

“Human etiquette, witcher, not the gods’. This is different. This is my home, now come on, Pris will kill me if I’m late again.” Jaskier scooped up his lute, and took Geralt’s hand in his. “Are you ready?”

“No.”

“Hold on tight, darling,” Jaskier grinned.

“Wait, fuck, Jaskier! Not a portal!”

But the witcher’s protests were swallowed up in a flurry of snow as they were transported to the realm of the gods. An echo of Jaskier’s musical laugh hung in the air as the snow settled on the ground as the witcher and his bard set off on their latest adventure.

[hexcrystals]

Hold me like you used to / read on ao3

Sometimes you don't know you've got something important until you lose it, or in Geralt's case, until you yell at it on a mountain that you want it to leave you alone.

i wrote a little fic about touch-starved!geralt (word count: 640, rating: gen)

--

Jaskier had never been shy with affection. The majority of people who had interacted with him had a memory of him squeezing their shoulder, ruffling their hair, maybe flinging his arms around their neck if he was in a particularly good mood. Geralt knew this more than most after all their travels together, his recollections of adventures interspersed with memories of Jaskier resting his head on Geralt’s shoulder on a cold evening beside the campfire, or massaging an injury after a fight, or peeling away bloodstained clothes and nudging him towards the bath. Sharing a bed together had almost always resulted in waking up with Jaskier’s face in his neck and their legs entwined.

There had been a comforting predictability to it all, a constant reassurance that there was somebody that didn’t find him completely repulsive. It had served as a reminder that he was cared for, even if the trade off was having to put up with Jaskier’s more annoying habits. 

It had taken Geralt a while to realise that he missed it - missed him - after they’d parted ways on the mountain. After a few days he’d felt odd and irritable in a way that he couldn’t pin down. It hadn’t hit him until he’d woken up one morning and automatically rolled towards the centre of the bed, expecting to find a warm and slightly snoring bard, and his chest had tightened upon realising that the bed was empty. It had pained him that he hadn’t noticed how much he relied on the warm safe feeling that Jaskier’s touch had brought him until it was gone.

He’d searched for the comfort in other places, waiting to feel satisfied by the embrace of a stranger in his bed, or the reunion hugs with Vesemir and his brothers in Kaer Morhen, but being left wanting. Even the kiss he’d shared with Yennefer hadn’t sufficed, although he’d tried to put that down to the fact that they’d been interrupted by Ciri. 

He’d known he was lying to himself. The common denominator was clear. Jaskier was always the missing piece.

***

He fought his way into the prison as if he was on autopilot, trying to push away the thought that Jaskier would be perfectly within his rights to tell him to fuck off and wouldn’t be being unreasonable if he’d rather stay in a cold and stinking cell than give Geralt the time of day. All the same, he smiled to himself when he heard Jaskier’s voice and the familiar din of spoons clattering together (which, on reflection, he’d always previously responded to by snapping at him to shut up). He hadn’t changed a bit.

Geralt turned the corner and pushed open the door of Jaskier’s cell.

‘Good sir, you would not know talent if I shoved it up your– Geralt.’ Jaskier’s eyes met his. His jaw trembled. Geralt held his breath. He desperately wanted to reach out, to pull Jaskier into his arms, but couldn’t face the possibility that Jaskier might flinch away.

‘Fuck it,’ muttered Jaskier. Geralt blinked, bracing himself for a torrent of vitriol. No doubt Jaskier had been rehearsing this for literal years. He probably had a list of scathing comments written down somewhere and stashed away in one of his many pockets.

Jaskier stepped forward and wrapped his arms around him. Geralt instinctively relaxed into the embrace, his hands clinging to the leather of Jaskier’s new coat. Jaskier’s hair was longer now, soft against his cheek. He breathed in against Jaskier’s neck, a warm feeling spreading throughout his body as he caught his familiar scent. It all felt right. For all he’d never appreciated it when they were together, Jaskier was Geralt’s safe place, and his arms felt like home.

‘I’ve missed you too.’ Geralt murmured. I won’t leave you again, he added silently. Please don’t leave me.

[trashbaggage]

POSSIBILITIES FOR IMMORTAL!JASKIER, PART THE SECOND (part 1)

his parents are actual gods and they literally grounded him and cut him off for shenanigans; it did not go how they expected, they thought he’d come whining back, not find himself a sexy little meal ticket

his parents are regular humans, but they had trouble conceiving; they find a djinn and make a wish for a healthy baby that will outlive his loved ones; everyone he has truly loved died in freak accidents, and he told himself he’d just stop loving people, but now he’s got his little found family to worry about oh god

clones? sure, fuck it, something with clones

he somehow got accidentally bonded to yen and became her familiar after the bottled appetites debacle, it takes them awhile to figure that one out

yennefer keeps complaining to tissaia about a certain bard, so tiss slips him a little something something so he sticks around and keeps yen humble

gets his power from breaking hearts and the only way to kill him is to break his :(

he’s constantly surrounded by these other banging long-lifers, his body takes one look at this gucci cullen family and just forgets he’s not Like That too

everyone knows about witcher schools, but there is a very secret place called xavier’s school for gifted bards; jask went through the trial of band camp and got some sweet mutations of his own

he uses the same moisturizer as sharon stone’s character in that awful 2004 catwoman movie that reverses the affects of aging; maybe he’s born with it maybe it’s beau-line

apparently, witcher semen has some.....unforeseen side effects with extensive and repeated use 😏

he’s actually a mage’s escaped experiment, well, i say mage, but victor never even finished his doctor mage training, he was a dropout with a god complex ugh

jask took one look at thicc thighs heart of tarnished gold and pretty eyes determination of forged steel and went, huh, how long do they live again? like, forever? cool cool cool. and then told melitele of his plight, who was like ‘oh yeah, sure sure, i get it’, and they made a deal: he gets a longer life if he spreads her name across the continent - she didn’t think it would be in the form of a curse, but he technically fulfilled his end of the bargain, melitele’s tits he’s crafty

died once, didn’t like it, decided not to do that again

this is jaskiers fantasy world we’re all just living in it (medieval matrix)

somehow acquired a cult following whose worship of him and his talents elevated him to god-like status

literal ray of sunshine - he’s old but still bright and hot like burning and if you look directly at him for an extended period of time your eyes start to hurt

struck by lightning in his mid-twenties and stopped aging

he’s a crossroads demon that tried to get geralt to make a deal, but geralt just thought he was a thirsty tagalong (which is not entirely incorrect) and jaskier is in too deep now, it’s a matter of pride and also feelings, yes he has everything under control please don’t send management up to check

time traveler that was booted from the flow of time for time crimes

roach is actually a magical being and jaskier became a favorite after all the treats and songs of her glory; one day while he’s braiding her mane, a silver apple appears on her saddle and he just. fuckin eats it, no questions. he’s been feeling great ever since

too much swag for the bodybag

he was a lute before a bored fae turned him into a Real Boy; whenever he lies you can hear the faint twang of lute strings - he’s gotten very good at speaking the truth at an angle

geralt says he’s not allowed to die

[lilackissed]

Random Asks - Nonnie said: “Well.. He still considered her a friend after he found out what she did to him, so he wasn’t THAT mad.. So feels harsh.”

I literally blinked at this ask for a couple of moments wondering if I read it correctly and then realized I’m going to have to get onto my Soap Box and pull out my Megaphone: just because an old-ish male author didn’t write Geralt as being as mad as he should have been, doesn’t mean that what Triss did was okay. That kind of thinking is just so dangerous.

What she did to Geralt was absolutely without his consent. This is where I say that ‘rape culture’ comes into it because there are STILL people in the world that think that if a guy ‘enjoys the sex it doesn’t count’, or that ‘women can’t rape men’, and it’s just not true. CONSENT MATTERS NO MATTER WHO YOU ARE. Triss had been rejected by Geralt because he was all about Yennefer (I mean they’re in love, so...), and the only way she could get him was to MAGICALLY ROOFIE HIM. It specifically said in print that she “seduced [him] with the help of a little magic.” She also tried to keep his memories away too because she was AWARE that the SECOND she let him regain his own agency, he would go right back to Yen and right back to rejecting her because he didn’t feel that way about her without her magical enchantments in place. So are you telling me that that’s okay? That because a guy that didn’t make it a big deal back in the day it was written (and in another country too), that we’re just supposed to forget it?

NO. NO WE ARE NOT JUST GOING TO FORGET IT.

This is such a good example of things that don’t age well. Geralt was taken advantage of, and no one got mad enough about it because they just let Triss off the hook. Assumed it was just some stray feelings they had together because no one knew specifically that Triss had magicked him. No one made a big enough deal about it, and if you really dig into it? This is a man who considers himself a MONSTER because the people around him do. Sure, he gets women when he does his job, because they think he’s a ‘savior’, etc., but he probably on some level thought he deserved it. He even called it a “mistake” and showed grief and guilt over what happened between them, and didn’t want to do it again. He thought that perhaps he brought it upon himself, but look, it’s still not okay.

So no, I don’t think it’s ‘harsh’ to call Triss out as a rapist. She literally took his agency away and slept with him without his actual consent, because she spelled him. So she is exactly that: a rapist. Sure, Show!Triss isn’t the same monster because they haven’t put any of that in, but if you see Triss slander around here, it’s about Book!Triss and Game!Triss, because that’s the source material, and because the games had Triss ADMIT that she “took advantage” of him, and because I do not condone anything that has to do with rape.

I know this isn’t what you wanted, Nonnie, but this is why I said not to come for me, lol. Thanks for coming to my Ted Talk. <3

[itsclydebitches]

:)))) So I've started playing the witcher again AND AHA i Have more complaints, doing some main quests cause there's nothing else rly to do now, and yen has just comfirmed that she also has amnesia for a short time, ARE YOU KIDDING ME???? This whole time, including literally the line before she said that, she's been belittling and mocking and just acting like she didn't believe Geralt about his amnesia/ THAT HIS ACTIONS WERE DUE TO HIS AMNESIA???? so.,,, she's rly just such a bitch lfmao I can't with this woman, She is a grown ass adult and she's being petty and cruel over something this man can't be entirely blamed for. Also asked why she didn't come look for geralt, as she only had her memory loss for a short time due to the mages helping her, she just assumed that geralt would look for her... she just assumed he was fine and- I can't stand her. I AM GONNA SPEED PAST HER SHIT AND GO FUCK AROUND SOME MORE HOLY SHIT shes insufferable

YOU'RE BACK, ANON, HI :D

All of this though. My knowledge of the Witcher story was so spotty when I first played that it took me a while to really piece everything together. (Helped immensely by playing through the first two games. Imagine that lol.) So when it fully hit home that 1. Yennefer also had amnesia, 2. She had been ignorantly pursuing another witcher just like Geralt pursued another sorceress (if we ignore the fact that Triss was actively going after him), 3. She recovered her memory way faster and did nothing to find/help Geralt, 4. She only sought him out after she'd tried to find Ciri herself and failed, AKA I'll look for you now that I need you for something, and finally 5. All of this came about because the Wild Hunt kidnapped Yennefer and Geralt TRADED HIMSELF FOR HER... I'm just, like, livid on his behalf lol. I mean damn, Geralt has his own list of flaws and you can absolutely play him as a dick, but in terms of the events we have no control over—their "real" characterization in the games—it really is a night and day difference between them. At least for me. Yeah, Yennefer is a grown-ass woman who spends the majority of the time being petty, hypocritical, or downright cruel. Does she have moments of compassion, wit, humor, etc.? Of course! Are they enough to outweigh everything else and make me like her though? Still nope...

I'm deep into my second playthrough and I'm like you, anon: I've been avoiding her parts as much as possible lol. I actually just went to Skellige because I need Yen for a secondary quest and I became frustrated by how heavy-handed their supposed chemistry is. You don't get a choice about whether Geralt greets her with a "You look beautiful" during a funeral, it just happens. The majority of the options from then on are some version of innuendo and when you pick the neutral route (that's thankfully there) Yen still turns it into a 'Remember the last time we were at a ball and had sex ;)' conversation, more innuendo about reading minds with the "I don't like that" option becoming more flirting about secrets... Even back before you've even found her it's all about her unique scent, the unicorn, how everyone recognizes you from the love ballads... it doesn't feel like they have a relationship to me. It's all just sex and how hot they both are. Compare that to literally anyone else in the game—yes, including Triss—and it just highlights how unnatural it feels. I mean, it's not going to feel unnatural to a player who already adores the relationship, but if you haven't bought into it yet... the game does incredibly little to sell them liking each other outside of the booty calls. I have no desire to romance Triss either, but at least with her I get conversations about the world, her interests, and our relationship outside of the physical. Yen seems to have three modes: we're having sex now, I hate you now, or we're looking for Ciri. It really doesn't make for an engaging romance imo. Especially in a game as choice-based as Witcher, you really can't get by on just "Well, they're canonical, so..."

In other news, I'm on the Blood and Broken Bones difficulty because I have every intention of platinuming this thing. I also added a couple of mods to even out aspects of the gameplay that previously bugged me. This included an "always full exp" mod because it sucked putting off a quest for a while, going back when you were a higher level, and getting literally 2exp for the same work. Except... then I leveled too quickly and all the mobs were super easy and I didn't want to "cheat" lol. So I got rid of the exp mod, added the AMAZING random encounters mod, cranked that difficulty up, and am now constantly besieged by mobs of my level or higher whenever I try to do... anything. It's great fun. Makes the world feel far more dangerous and you can earn a little extra coin by taking on bounties. I hope to make all the grandmaster witcher gear this time, so I'm gonna need all the coin I can get...

Do you plan to get the DLCs when you're done? I'm so eager to replay Blood and Wine again!

[natilieal]

the way is dark and long (i can bring you home again)

Daunted by the idea of a lifetime without Jaskier, Geralt tries to bargain with Death. or, a Geraskier Orpheus & Eurydice retelling.

thank you to @sulkyskywalker​ for betaing and @horsedadgeralt​ for listening to me yell about this fic literally all the time. warnings: MCD, hurt/no comfort, ambiguous/open ending read it on ao3! 

Jaskier dies peacefully at sixty-eight, while Geralt is visiting him in Oxenfurt. He’s been ill for the last few months. They’d both known that it was coming.

Jaskier had taken the news fairly well when he’d found out that he was unlikely to get better. He’d been content in the knowledge that he would be remembered through his music. Geralt had not reacted quite so gracefully. Somehow, in their years of travelling, he had forgotten that Jaskier was mortal — that there would come a day where Geralt would be alone again. They’d had fifty years together, and it had not been enough. By the time Jaskier actually dies, Geralt is lost, unmoored, uncertain of himself and his future in a way he has never been before.

Jaskier is one of the most esteemed professors at Oxenfurt when he dies, with an obnoxious list of awards and qualifications under his belt. When his death is announced, the entire city pauses to mourn him.

There are pretty speeches at his funeral, which Geralt has only stuck around for because he knows Jaskier would have been amused by the thought of it.

‘Jaskier will be missed,’ Geralt hears someone say. ‘A visionary, who contributed greatly to the arts, his influence will not be forgotten...’

The world will not forget Jaskier. They will remember his music, and his stories. They will read his books in the Oxenfurt library, pore over his lyrics. But what about Geralt? He has no university campus to visit in order to reminisce. He has no books that he can read to remind himself of Jaskier. He only has the long, lonely road ahead of him, and the vague memory of when times were better.

He thinks, how am I supposed to do this without Jaskier?

And then, Geralt gets an idea.

⸻

He’s heard the stories. Everyone has. They’re all the same: someone driven mad by their grief summons Death, and begs for their loved one to be returned to them. Death offers them a challenge that they fail due to some irredeemable human flaw, and their loved one remains in the underworld. They’re supposed to be cautionary tales, designed to ensure that people stick to the status quo and don’t challenge fate when they aren’t equipped for it.

Based on Geralt’s track record, he thinks he might actually have a fighting chance.

Yennefer tells him that he’s an idiot when he goes to ask her for help. She tells him that it’s a fool’s errand, and will only end in disappointment for him. But she still hands him a map and a set of instructions, and sends him on his way. If he didn’t know better, he’d say that she was hoping he’d be able to bring Jaskier back, too.

⸻

And so, for the second time in his life, Geralt finds himself hiking up a mountain. The ground is dry and dusty under his feet, the foliage on either side of the path dead and shrivelled up. At the summit is a tall, wizened tree. He can imagine Jaskier making a biting comment about how the symbolism is a little on the nose, really, this is just silly—

Geralt imagines the kind of running commentary Jaskier would have kept up as he reaches the base of the tree and begins to set up. Yennefer had given him a pouch of dried herbs, some oils, and a long list of instructions that he could barely understand. Something about the ingredients, a circle, and a memory of the loved one.  

He can almost hear Jaskier’s scorn, really Geralt, what does she think she’s going to achieve with this? Are we cooking, or performing a summoning ritual? Although I suppose, to her, they’re much the same thing—

‘Witcher.’

Geralt looks up.

Before him stands Death, tall and imposing, and utterly terrifying. It turns to look at him, bones creaking. There are yawning holes where its eyes should be, and it makes the hairs on the back of Geralt’s neck stand on end. He has never felt as small and insignificant as he does under this unerring gaze.

He tries to speak, but his throat feels stuck. ‘I—’

‘You wish for him back,’ Death says in its raspy voice, quiet and cacophonous all at once.  

‘Yes,’ Geralt says, ‘I do.’

Death tilts its head slowly, assessing. ‘Many before you have come to ask me for the same thing. Each time, I ask the same question: what makes you think you are worthy of the privilege?’

Geralt does not have an answer. Death is inevitable. What right does he have to disturb the natural order of things? Who is he, to approach Death and make demands?

He thinks of Jaskier, sitting at their campfire, eyes twinkling in the firelight as he laughs at something Geralt has said.

‘I am not worthy yet,’ Geralt says. ‘But I want to be.’

Death leans forward. It looms tall and unsettling above him.

‘You would have me issue you a challenge to prove your worth,’ Death says. ‘As I do for all the others.’

‘Yes,’ Geralt replies. It’s a stupid gamble to make, he knows. But a future without Jaskier looms, lonely and silent and miserable, and Geralt knows he has to try.

‘Interesting.’ Death peers down at him, the way Geralt imagines one might peer down at a faintly interesting bug. ‘You think I will ask you to slay some impossible beast, to prove your skill as a protector.’

Geralt had sort of been hoping for that, actually. There is a rasping noise that sounds almost like a chuckle.

‘Sometimes,’ Death says, ‘there are more important things than physical prowess.’

⸻

Geralt is in a marketplace. His vision is hazy and blurred but he can see the crowd, and the market stalls. The chatter and bustle of the marketplace is strangely muffled to his ears, almost as if he is in a bubble. People are forming a circle around him, speaking, but he cannot make out the words. Next to him stands Death, and Geralt thinks, oh, this is my challenge.

There is a familiar body laying at his feet, blood slowly pooling in the cracks between the cobblestones. His heart constricts.

‘Do you remember this, witcher?’ Death asks, next to him.

Geralt stares down at Renfri’s body and cannot speak.

Death says, ‘Tell me what happened here.’

‘I didn’t want to get involved,’ Geralt replies. His throat works, but he can’t find it in him to say more. Even now, after all these years, the regret eats away at him. Even now, I didn’t want to get involved feels like an excuse.

‘But you did, in the end.’ Death turns to him. ‘You cannot stay impartial forever. Wisdom is not stepping back, witcher. Wisdom is knowing which battle to pick.’

Geralt tears his eyes away from Renfri, and looks across the courtyard. He watches the blurry crowd part as Stregobor steps forward. His mouth moves. Geralt cannot hear what he’s saying, but he knows. He remembers the words clearly.

You butchered bodies in the streets of Blaviken...

‘If you could relive this moment,’ Death asks, ‘what would you choose?’

Geralt looks back down at Renfri, pale, quiet and still. How many nights had he laid awake, asking himself the same question? How many times had he replayed the events in Blaviken in his mind, searching for an alternate solution, some way that both Renfri and Stregobor could have survived? He had nearly driven himself mad with it.

Vesemir always told him he was too soft.

‘I don’t know,’ Geralt says, quiet and ashamed. ‘I think I would regret whatever choice I made. I don’t think I would get involved.’

Death hums. ‘Sometimes, inaction is the worst evil.’

Geralt blinks, and Death is gone. He has a moment to wonder if this means he’s failed, when everything sharpens back into focus and, for a second time, he stands on the streets of Blaviken and listens to their cries of butcher and monster. He sees the townspeople picking up stones, raising their arms.

He shuts his eyes as the first stone connects.

⸻

The next time he opens his eyes, he’s in Calanthe’s court, a crowd of knights and would-be suitors staring at him. In the middle of the crowd, where he knows Pavetta and Duny once stood, is Death.

‘Do you remember this night?’ Death asks.

Geralt wonders if his challenge is to suffer through a series of stupid questions. He nods.

‘Tell me what happened.’

Geralt remembers his words even now, hasty, thoughtless — that which you already have but do know.

‘I didn’t think before I spoke,’ Geralt admits. It rankles, being this candid about his flaws — but where else can he be honest, if not with Death?

‘You didn’t,’ Death agrees. ‘What happened as a result?’

’Ciri was put in danger. She might have grown up in court, but now — now, she will always be at risk.’

‘Because of you,’ Death says. Its voice is toneless, but Geralt thinks he can hear a condemnation in it anyway.

‘Because of me,’ he agrees quietly.

Death inclines its head, and the scene changes.

⸻

Next, Geralt finds himself laying on the hard floor of what was once a stately manor home, surrounded by its rubble. Yennefer lies next to him, asleep, smiling softly. It’s been so long since he’s seen her smile that he finds it hard to tear his eyes away.

Death stands in front of them, waiting.

‘I wanted to save her,’ Geralt says. ‘I wanted to protect her.’

‘Did you succeed?’

‘Yes,’ Geralt says, stubborn. I didn’t fail her. Not like the others.

‘How are you sure that you saved her?’ Death asks.

‘She’s alive,’ Geralt says. ‘She could have died, but she didn’t. I saved her.’

‘Is being alive the final goal?’ Death tilts its head.

‘Yes.’ Geralt scowls. He is not the first to supplicate himself before Death and ask for someone to return to them — surely, Death must understand the inherent desire, the drive to continue living.

‘She lives now, according to the demands of your wish. Is that life?’

Geralt’s breath catches.

He thinks of Yennefer, intelligent and vicious and enthralling. He thinks of the nights they’ve spent together, laying together and talking. He thinks of the way he’d marvelled at how similar they are; the way that she soothed the aching, raw loneliness in him. The way she looked at him and he, for the first time, felt seen.

He thinks about the djinn, and how he’d desperately, selfishly, wanted to hold onto that companionship for a little longer.

He remembers Yennefer on the mountain, furious and biting. Yennefer, who wants nothing but her own agency — and who has none now, because of him. Because of his selfish determination to keep her around.

‘Do you think you saved her?’ Death asks. It feels like a judgement.

Because of you, Death had said, earlier.

Geralt is starting to understand the challenge now.

‘No,’ he replies. ‘I don’t think I did.’

⸻

The scene shifts around him, and Geralt doesn’t give it time to settle before he turns on Death.

‘I thought you said you’d give me a chance,’ he snarls.

‘I thought you said you weren’t worthy,’ Death replies. ‘How can you hope to be, if you can’t acknowledge your wrongs?’

‘So, what,’ Geralt barely resists the urge to shout, ‘you’re just going to stand here and make me recount all my terrible choices? What good is that going to do me?’

Death pauses long enough for Geralt to begin to feel wrong-footed.

‘If that’s all you think this is,’ Death says, sounding almost disappointed, ‘then perhaps you aren’t worthy.’

The vague swirls of colour and sound surrounding them shift and warp, and suddenly Geralt is sitting in the corner of a small, dingy tavern in Posada. Death sits beside him, and they both watch as Jaskier wanders the room, singing and strumming his lute.

‘Why do you want him back?’ Death asks.

Geralt watches as Jaskier fails to charm the patrons with his singing. He thinks of all the times he’s listened with half an ear as Jaskier walks beside him, workshopping new lyrics. He thinks about the yawning hole in his heart that threatens to consume him when he thinks about a future without Jaskier in it — silent, miserable, dull.

‘I can’t live without him,’ Geralt says.

‘Did he know that?’ Death asks.

Geralt opens his mouth to respond, outraged, when the scene changes.

They are outside now, and Jaskier is doubled over where Geralt has punched him —

Jaskier frowning as Geralt brushes him off with some biting comment —

Jaskier, massaging his blistered feet while Geralt rolls his eyes —

Jaskier, holding the shattered pieces of the pitcher the djinn had been in while Geralt yells at him —

Jaskier, throat swelling, blood pouring from his mouth —

Jaskier, on the mountain, wide-eyed and impossibly hurt as Geralt shouts if life could give me one blessing…

‘Stop it,’ Geralt says, looking away. The shame of it all eats at him. He knows he’s been cold, and cruel to Jaskier — knows that, for a long time, he had been far less than what Jaskier deserved. But after they’d reunited, he’d tried to be better. Tried to be kinder, more patient. He knows it was almost too late, but he’d tried anyway.

‘Was it enough?’ Death asks. ‘Or was he just grateful that you were doing the bare minimum?’

Geralt doesn’t know how to answer. He thinks back, now, on all the times he’d tried to do something nice for Jaskier — walking slower, making a more conscious effort to listen to him, offering suggestions for his music… At the time, he’d been proud of himself for improving, for making Jaskier happy. Perhaps he’d been mistaken. Perhaps Jaskier had just been grateful to receive any kind of consideration at all.

‘I can do better.’

‘Will you? Or will you continue to mistreat those around you—’

‘Enough of this!’ Geralt snaps. ‘Yes, I’m aware that I can be thoughtless, and cruel. I know that Jaskier deserves better. But standing here and talking about it isn’t the same thing as actually giving me a second chance! How can I prove I’m worthy if all I do is stand here and listen to you condemn me?!’

Death regards him in silence, for a moment, before nodding.

‘You don’t have to prove yourself worthy to me,’ Death says, and Geralt wants to scream in frustration, because what was the point of all this then—

Suddenly, Geralt realises where he is. He’s standing once again on that damned mountain, where everything went wrong so long ago. The wind around him is cold and biting as he stares out at the landscape. He remembers standing here, feeling small and helpless and so lost. He remembers snarling if life could give me one blessing…

Jaskier forgave him eventually, but Geralt has never quite managed to forgive himself.

‘If I am not to prove it to you,’ Geralt says, slow and measured. He knows better than to speak out of anger, now, ‘then what am I to do?’

‘Prove it to him,’ Death says, inclining its head.

Before him stands Jaskier, young again, staring at him with wide eyes. Geralt is rooted to the spot as he watches Jaskier open his mouth. No sound comes out.

‘Jaskier—’

‘He cannot hear you,’ Death says. ‘He is still a spirit. You can see each other, but you cannot speak.’

‘Why is he here?’ Geralt asks.

‘You wanted a challenge, witcher,’ Death says. ‘Here it is: leave this mountain.’

Geralt opens his mouth, outraged, but Death raises a hand to silence him.

‘It’s a show of trust. At every turn, you have tried to control the lives — and the destinies — of those around you. Jaskier will have the choice to follow you. Your challenge is to trust him. Lead him off the mountain, without looking behind you to check if he is following. If you leave the mountain without looking back, he will return to you as a mortal. If you do look behind you to check, he will remain a spirit. Do you understand?’

Jaskier is looking between Death and Geralt, mouth moving quickly, urgently. Geralt wishes he could understand.

‘What if,’ Geralt pauses, looking over at Jaskier. The thought hurts, but he has to ask. ‘What if he doesn’t follow me?’

‘That’s his choice, witcher. You said you want a chance to prove yourself. Are you worth leaving the afterlife for?’

Geralt does not answer. He cannot read the look in Jaskier’s eyes.

Death looks between them. ‘Do you trust each other?’

Geralt’s heart constricts uncomfortably in his chest. He’s almost afraid of what Jaskier will say. But Jaskier nods, eyes never leaving Geralt’s. Something in his chest loosens.

‘I do,’ Geralt says.

Death extends a hand, toward the path down the mountain. The path they should have taken together, so many years ago.

Geralt takes one last, lingering look at Jaskier, and then turns away and begins to walk.

⸻

Geralt walks slowly down the mountain. The path is steep and treacherous, and he remembers it being full of monsters. For all he knows, Death might have left a few creatures prowling the undergrowth as part of the challenge. He listens for any unusual sounds, but otherwise tries to lose himself in the walk. He puts one foot in front of the other and prays that he’ll see Jaskier again soon.

But he can’t focus. The back of his neck prickles, and every few steps he scans the bushes ahead of him, searching for some invisible threat. He feels uncomfortable and off-kilter, and it takes a moment to realise why.

The woods around him are silent. There is no wind to rustle the trees, no birds that chirp, no animals that startle as he walks by. There is nothing, save for the sound of his own footsteps.

His own footsteps. No one else’s.

Geralt stops, listening intently. Perhaps he’d been too distracted to listen for Jaskier’s footsteps, so used to hearing them in the background. Perhaps he’d missed some other indicator that Jaskier is behind him - the quiet intake of breath, or the steady beat of a heart.

But he can’t hear those, either.

Geralt takes a deep breath, grounding himself against the rising panic in his chest, and pushes on. There are any number of reasons he might not be able to hear Jaskier. It could be part of Death’s challenge, to test his resolve. It could be something as simple as the fact that Jaskier, at this moment, is still a ghost, no physical body to make noise with. Perhaps there is nothing to worry about.

Or perhaps, Geralt’s traitorous mind whispers, he just chose not to follow you.

He tries to push the thought away as he continues walking, picking his way slowly down the familiar path. Of course Jaskier would be following him.

Wouldn’t he?

If life could give me one blessing…

Had Geralt really done enough since then, to make it up to Jaskier? He’d thought so, for a while. He’d found Jaskier again, and grovelled, and let Jaskier scream and cry and rage. He’d apologised until Jaskier had scoffed and told him to stop. He’d taken Jaskier to Kaer Morhen, to the coast, to every village and festival and frivolous market he could think of. He sat and listened to Jaskier perform and fought past the impulse to be sullen in order to compliment him. He made an effort to talk more, to be kinder, to be better. To be the kind of man that deserved someone like Jaskier.

But what if it hadn’t been enough? There were still times where he snapped at Jaskier. When he was tired and overwhelmed, and Jaskier’s voice had been a bit too grating. There were times where he didn’t have it in him to entertain Jaskier’s conversation or his song. Times when he was too caught up in his own head, where Jaskier would get that uncertain look on his face again.

He thought he’d been doing better, but what if he’d been wrong? What if he’d mistaken Jaskier’s unhappy silences as contentment? He’s seen, now, that he’s always been callous, unthinking, and selfish. What if he’d only thought he was doing better, meanwhile he’d been making Jaskier unhappy in different ways?

What if Jaskier is still standing up on the top of the mountain with Death, watching him journey down, alone?

What is he supposed to do if he makes it to the bottom and Jaskier isn’t there?

Do you trust him? Death had asked. Jaskier nodded. Geralt tries to focus on that memory, on what he thinks was grim determination on Jaskier’s face.

How can you trust him to follow you, Geralt thinks, if you can’t even read his facial expressions after fifty years? How well do you really know him?

It’s almost enough to make Geralt stop in his tracks. How well does he know Jaskier? They learned a lot about each other, in all their years of travelling together. But does he know enough?

He knows that Jaskier is as cruel as he is kind. He is flighty and shallow and sometimes pretentious, but he is also patient and sweet and incredibly loyal. He has a high tolerance for pain, and more compassion than anyone else Geralt has ever met. He likes stopping in their travels to admire the scenery, and pressing flowers between the pages of his songbooks, and wearing pretty things even when he knows they won’t last on the road. He likes to test his abilities by speaking in limericks, especially when he’s annoyed with Geralt, and spends most of his waking hours thinking about his music. He knows that Jaskier is afraid of being lonely, afraid of losing his ability to create art. He knows that Jaskier is fierce, and skilled, and disciplined, and hardworking. He’s also incredibly petty, and enjoys insulting people just quietly enough that only Geralt can hear. He likes to think he knows Jaskier fairly well.

But what about the little things? If pressed, Geralt doesn’t think he’d be able to name Jaskier’s favourite colour, or his favourite food, or his fondest childhood memory. He knows that when they are camping in the forest, Jaskier will eat rabbit, but nothing else. When they are near the water, he will eat any fish that Geralt catches, but will always refuse duck. Is that enough? Those situations are borne out of necessity. Geralt realises that he does not know all that much about Jaskier for the sake of knowing Jaskier — he only knows the things about Jaskier that make his own life easier when they travel together.

How can you think yourself worthy of Jaskier, when you have only ever been selfish with him?

Geralt ignores the thought. In the distance he can see the base of the mountain, the beginnings of a small town. He is so close. He just has to make it there, and then he will have Jaskier back.

How can you be sure he’s behind you? The thought, when it comes, sounds suspiciously like Death’s voice.

Geralt swallows, nervous, and does not know how to counter the thought. If Jaskier isn’t behind him when he makes it to the base of the mountain, he will have lost his only chance to get Jaskier back. There will be no last-minute loopholes to exploit — no one is able to summon Death twice.

But if Jaskier is behind him, and he turns to look...

But then, why would Jaskier be behind him? Geralt isn’t sure he’s ever been very good to Jaskier. At the beginning he was impatient, and callous, and cruel, refusing to even admit that they were friends. After they reunited he tried to be better — but as Death had proved, even when he’s trying to do the right thing, he makes everything worse. What reason would Jaskier have to follow him back into a world where he’d have to endure long hours of travelling, sleeping on hard ground, dealing with Geralt’s mood swings? Why would he give up eternal rest for that? Even death did not allow Jaskier to escape Geralt’s selfishness.

And that’s all this is, Geralt realises uncomfortably. He’s just being selfish. Jaskier lived a long life, and enjoyed great successes in his career. He should want for nothing, now, except the chance to rest. But Geralt is the one disturbing him, because he’s lonely. Because he’s afraid of what his life is going to be like without Jaskier. Wouldn’t it be a kindness, then, to turn around? To just let Jaskier rest? To give Jaskier peace, and calm his own racing thoughts?

But what if Jaskier is behind him? What if, by some miracle, Jaskier wants to come back? What if Jaskier has missed him, is similarly devastated by the idea of being parted? It sounds unlikely, but he has to consider all possibilities. If he turns around, is he condemning Jaskier to an afterlife he might not want? Should he remain determined, and wait until he’s fulfilled Death’s challenge?

If he doesn’t turn around until it’s too late, will he be able to live with himself?

Geralt knows his thoughts are going in circles. There are so many variables, so many unknowns in the situation that he doesn’t quite know how to approach it. He doesn’t know what the right decision is. All he knows is that he misses Jaskier, more than he thought he could. There is a deep ache in his chest that seems to get worse with every step — he just wants to know that Jaskier is there. He just wants to turn around and check.

He just wants to tell Jaskier all the things he was afraid of saying before. And if he succeeds — if he stays strong and leads Jaskier off the mountain — he thinks he will. He’ll apologise properly and pour his heart out and do things differently, this time.

If Jaskier is there.

Geralt is nearly at the base of the mountain now. He can see the city from here, can see all the people going about their day. He’s so close to completing his challenge. He is so close to having Jaskier back.

Part of him feels, with a terrible sort of certainty, that Jaskier is not behind him. That he never was. And he knows that if he loses his one chance to check, to outsmart Death, that none of it will matter anymore. Now that he’s lived with Jaskier by his side, he can’t go back to being alone.

He can’t stand the agony of theorising, of trying to account for a million different possibilities. Whether Jaskier is behind him or not, whether Jaskier wants to be following or not, he needs to know.

The faint sounds of laughter from the city below reach his ears, almost unbearably loud as it finally cuts through the oppressive silence he’s been walking in. He can hear the chatter of the marketplace, of people going about their lives. He’s so close to completing the challenge, to knowing the truth. He just has to persevere a little longer. The ache in his chest gets worse.

But Death is right. Geralt is selfish, and unthinking, and rash — especially when it comes to Jaskier. No matter how hard he has tried to make things better, it’s never quite been enough. There is no guarantee that he will be able to do better. There is no guarantee that Jaskier is following him at all. What, then, is one more self-serving act?

Geralt stops, and listens to the sounds of the city. He can hear the vague stirrings of a song coming from the tavern; someone’s voice, high and reedy, accompanied by a lute. Geralt smiles, imagines that it’s Jaskier singing for him, one last time.

He turns around.

[bamf-jaskier]

Jaskier: Worst Time Traveler EVER

Jaskier is sent back in time to his younger body in 1231 when he is 9 years old

He then proceeds to decide that this is now the time that he ought to try and save Renfri, thereby rectifying Geralt's biggest mistake. So, in all his newfound wisdom a 9 year old Jaskier runs away from Lettenhove and goes North to Blaviken.

Jaskier finds Renfri a few days before Geralt is set to arrive and he tries to convince her to leave but of course it doesn't work so then Jaskier tries to tell her about the time travel but she doesn't believe him. So Jaskier predicts that a white haired witcher will arrive soon and she begins to believe him a bit

especially after Jaskier, this tiny fucking 9 year old, says some VERY specific things about this Geralt guy that turns out to be right. So this time, after Geralt and Renfri meet in the tavern, Renfri says fuck it and stays in the woods. Geralt shrugs and goes on his way, thinking he's really done something here.

Now Jaskier is like, yes!! I have accomplished the thing!! I saved the day!! then he realizes: oh fuck I am 9 and ran away from home and holy fuck I am not going through puberty and a lordly upbringing again. I will not take the Oxenfurts exams again and you can't make me.

Renfri realizes how fucked Jaskier is and offers to...take him under her wing. Jaskier is pissed cause like he's an ADULT okay? but Renfri is just like, "ur 9" and Jaskier gives up cause what the hell else can he really do, he's not returning home.

So Renfri still wants to fuck up Stregobor but decides to put that quest on the backburner and tries to figure out what she wants to do with her life. She decides to go into the mercenary business and baby Jaskier is very offended he does NOT like to fight but well he has nothing else to do so he tags along and waits in the taverns or camp while Renfri goes out on contracts

Renfri goes out on her first mercenary contract and Jaskier is left alone, chillin by the fire. unfortunately the target shows up and tries to kill Jaskier but then Jaskier pulls some Ciri level magic shit and sends the man flying and he finds out something FUN. turns out, getting sent back to the past left magic residue on him and now he can use chaos. fuck.

so now Jaskier is 9, has the ability to use chaos and is not fucking happy about any of this. Honestly, he would try and seek out Geralt or Yennefer and try to talk to them or something but right now Yennefer is still in court and Geralt wouldn't believe him no matter what he said.

Renfri is like, "well shit I kind of have to take care of this kid but he's also a well of information about the future and knows ways too much" so she tries to coax Jaskier into learning how to fight a bit but he literally is so pissed and bitter that he instead focus on getting his hands on any musical instrument and playing that.

Jaskier changes his mind when Renfri gets hurt and he decides to learn to fight to protect her and how to control his newfound chaos.

He gets accepted into Ban Ard and while he doesn't like being separated from Renfri he decides it's for the best and she promises to keep a low profile for a few years. At the same time, Jaskier is also gonna get that sweet sweet info on Stregobor so Renfri can take him OUT

So Jaskier studies at Ban Ard, learns some chaos and fucks off at that fancy dance where you get assigned your future kingdom. Of course, he gains a best friend who is in the same year as him at Aretuza called Triss Merigold. He had known of her vaguely before but was never close with her and Jaskier is very happy to be making friends that aren't just ghosts of his past.

Jaskier finds out where Stregobor is and him and Renfri kill the bastard together and while Triss is in Temeria, Jaskier is constantly visiting her and he gains a reputation as "that fucking mage" cause he does whatever

At this point, Jaskier has made some solid changes to the timeline. Witchers aren't quite so hated because Blaviken hasn't happened, Stregobor is dead and Renfri is alive.

Renfri is currently planning a revolution in Creyden and wants to overthrow the monarchy and Jaskier thinks that's pretty fucking neat so he agrees. However, as he is getting in position to start a riot who does he find but Geralt of fucking Rivia, brought on by the royal family of Creyden to prevent an uprising.

Jaskier has to think fast, so he does what any self-respecting man would do, he sleeps with Geralt to distract him while Renfri starts a riot, kills the royal family and establishes herself as the true heir to Creyden. Geralt is, understandably, VERY unhappy with this turn of events and gains kind of angry obsession with hunting down Jaskier.

So now you have Jaskier who is planning on working alongside Renfri to overthrow kingdoms and he keeps recruiting mages like Triss and Yennefer to help and Geralt is hunting Jaskier down, determined to fuck him up, both literally and figuratively.

...

on the one hand: Jaskier is a little sad he isn't using Geralt as his muse anymore

on the other hand: he is getting laid a LOT more

...

Geralt: you goddamn son of a bitch, why do you know so much about me?

Jaskier: I am from a timeline where we were best friends and I wrote songs about you and traveled alongside you for over 20 years

Geralt: you have to know there is no way I can disprove that right?

Jaskier: You bet!

Geralt: I am going to kill you now

Jaskier: Or sleep with me

Geralt: ...or sleep with you

[disaster-lineage]

content creator 2021 wrapped tag game

Cut this into what works for you. Want to do only one instead of five? Do it. Tag 2 people? Do it. This game is not your mum or the Apple App store to tell you what to do. But there are a couple of rules:

RULE 1: Review your creations over 2021. Tag some gifmakers/creators, friends and strangers to get them to do the same.

RULE 2: Link to the content, commentary optional.

thank you @usermurdocks and @capinejghafa  for tagging me!

5 (or more!) creations from others that made you smash the reblog button hard, closely followed by your ‘insp’ tag or ‘fave tag’. Link to sets that started conversations, outstanding composition, colouring, etc.

oh man there are so many that i’ve love i will probably never be able to list them all but will try my best

ladies of shadow and bone -> color palette / characteristics by @capinejghafa

okay okay this set is just so gorgeous and was such a great gift. and it has like everything you could want, all the sab ladies, gorgeous blending, and beautiful colors!

i also want to mention myra’s kanej + reincarnation au gifset because like it’s gorgeous it’s kanej and it’s purple...like what more could you want!

the witcher › season 2 by @jjmaybanks

there are so many of beck’s gifsets i could mention but like the fact that this edit was made just from the trailer is just amazing! like it’s so gorgeous, the coloring is amazing and has such a cool layout. but like my favorite part is the middle gif, i’ve never seen anyone use do the mix of colors and b&w on a layout and I just thinks it’s so cool!

okay i’m going to mention another one because I can’t help myself but this ciri gifset is ummm just art, it’s stunning and gorgeous and i don’t know what else to say about it other i think you all should just go stare at because it’s gorgeous

darkling by @clarke-griffin

okay the first time i saw this gif i just stared and then i want to both make gifsets as stunning and to never make gifs again because i could never make something as stunning. it’s just amazing and one of coolest uses of overlays and textures i’ve seen in gifs!

yennefer meme: femme fatale by @yenvengerberg

i just...it’s gorgeous and don’t really know what else to say because what is there to say??? I could stare this edit for hour and probably have but it’s just stunning and fits the film noir/femme fatale vibe so well

rebecca + alone by @queencalanthes​

i think my jaw literally dropped when i saw this edit. like the way... THE WAY THE TEXT DISAPPEARS IN THE LAST GIF?!?! it’s so good it makes me lose my mind

okay, i’m going to stop now but i could probably keep going forever there are sooooo many talented creators on here

4-5 creations of which you’re proud. These are goals you scored. Nothing to do with notes.

nina zenik

i think this was probably the first edit  of mine where i really tried to do something cool with the typography and really liked how it ended up!

kaz brekker

i think this was the first gifset that i felt 100% confident post and just overall felt good about

inej ghafa

this edit took me forever, like i’m pretty sure i had a headache by the end of making it. i think i colored most of the gifs frame by frame but honestly it was worth it. this edit is still one of my favorite edits i’ve ever made and the one i’m most proud

ciri of cintra

i just love the colors in this a whole lot and honestly had a lot of fun making this. i mostly used it as an excuse to try some different coloring and affects that i hadn’t done before

3-4 creations others loved. Include the one that one that got most notes, great comments, or the classic ‘how dare you!’

letterboxd reviews + sebastian 

letterboxd reviews + lilo and stitch

inej ghafa

2-3 creations that stretched you as a creator: style, coloring, blending, text, etc. include the one that should have got more notes.

nina zenik 

making this edit was an experience...one that might have involved tears 

daredevil

this was the second edit i made with a layout and like it tested me man. first the math of trying to figure out the size of the gifs and then just putting everything together was an EXPERIENCE

1 creation of yours that you find most aesthetically pleasing to the eye and self AND 1 creation that broke and (maybe remade you) as a creator – we all have that one.

   aesthetically pleasing: yennefer + tissaia

maybe one of my more simple edits but think it’s one of my favorites!

creation that broke me: inej + knives

i was so excited to make this edit and it just...like still can’t think about it. i just could not make it work how i wanted to

0 the creation that never was because nothing was working that day.

i have a good chuck of sab ladies rainbow edit done. i started it for sab ladies application week but just didn’t finish it in time and i just haven’t had the motivation to work on it since but i do plan to finish it at some point. here’s one of the gifs from the set:

Overall comment on your creativity year 2021: i started gif for the first time in like a year and half and have trying out some many new things and just created so much that i’m proud of!

i don’t know who’s already done this so i’m just going to tag some people:

@rreputatiions, @steve-harringtons, @yelenabeluva, @nikolai-llantsov, @kazs-rietvelds, @queencalanthes​, @riietveld​, @spideyandrews​

[aerialflight]

Fic Rec (where i'm into too many fandoms rn and ships which is weird of me)

[Bleach] (been a while amiright?)

Oxytocin by Asuka Kureru (Askerian)

Ship: Grimmjow/Ichigo/Orihime

Complete trust and physical affection are great!

They're a bit less great when they were caused by weird hollow drugs.

They're even less great when the guy who was drugged up into loving the hell out of you is the same guy who tried to murder you a couple times a couple years ago.

(listen i just stumbled upon this and I have no regrets. i don't usually go for ships, let alone poly, but like, GOD, i love how everyone is characterized here, especially orihime and i just want to SCREAM OK? OK. the vibe i get from this fic reminds me of @murderlight (big fan) and if that doesn't say anything, i don't know what will.)

-

[Gintama] (i don't know how i spiralled into this fandom either, been literal years since i've even thought about this fandom, i have no regrets)

Grab Your Dreams With Your Fists While You Can Still Remember It by yatagarasu (leelhiette)

Ship: Hijikata Toshirou/Sakata Gintoki

Toshirou should learn to look both ways before crossing the road.

(Or he learns more about the people around him and about himself.)

(amnesia fic, and i know it's a common trope but they did it BEAUTIFULLY here. love this so much. and it's post-canon.)

I feel you by arashian155 for machinecuisine

Ship: Hijikata Toshirou/Sakata Gintoki

“I’m so done with this,” Gintoki muttered angrily. Zura sighed while Tatsuma laughed loudly. “Your soulmate’s getting roughed up again?” Gintoki groaned. “Worst timing ever! There was this one Amanto swinging his gigantic sword at me and I was just about to dodge it when, out of fucking nowhere, I feel something stabbing my shoulder! It threw me off and if it weren’t for that, I would have been perfectly healthy right now instead of getting nursed for this stupid wound!” he pointed at the ugly slash across his torso. “Fuck soulmates!”

A story about Sakata Gintoki's journey into embracing his soulbond, falling in love, and learning the cons of selflessness.

(THE SLOW BUILD-UP OF THEIR RELATIONSHIP AND THE PLOT FOLLOWS CANON AND I CAN'T STOP TALKING ABOUT THIS STUPID FIC I'M SO STUPID FOR THIS STUPID SHIP FEIWNFOPA)

-

[One Piece] (of course)

Undone by pkmntrainer_alex

After the entire family almost dies at WCI, Judge Vinsmoke orders the removal of his sons' emotional modifications in a bid to save his own skin in future endeavors. He doesn't stop to consider the ramifications of his 21-year-old sons finally, suddenly, being able to feel their human emotions in full - and their newfound ability to judge both themselves and him by their past actions.

(the vinsmoke family dynamics and the brothers trying to deal with 21 years of pent up emotions? they're trying?? so freaking hard to be functional people and they realize just how freaking amazing sanji is and that HE wasn't the failure in this family??? god, i've reread this fic so many times like an addict please read and suffer the feels with me. this is the one fic where i'm trying to patiently wait for an update. i'm just happy that this exists.)

Song of the Swords by authenticaussie

Wado is tiny when she first appears before him; her tears are as silver as her hair and the moonlight, and they gleam from within with golden fire as they pour down her cheeks.

Zoro’s heart fairly stops in his chest for a very, very long moment.

(personified swords au! introspective and fascinating and a character study of zoro and his relationship with his swords! really liked this!)

where the rims have ridges by Civillain

Everything everyone does is in their own self-interest.

"I like your hat," she calls out quietly.

And the change is instantaneous. He stops where he stands, a hand on his head and his knees still bent to take another step, and turns to look over his shoulder.

There's a moment of silence where he says nothing, just peering at her with squinted eyes, before: "Thanks!" he beams.

His smile is wide and unchecked, so wide that it might make his cheeks ache. He doesn't have laugh lines, but the way he smiles makes her imagine that he's spent his whole life grinning like that, warmly and brightly, so sincere and upfront that the breath gets punched right out her lungs.

Sometimes, there are people close to exceptions. But not quite.

20 years apart, and two people that don't make any sense.

(god, such a good outside pov look on luffy! luffy is such an unreadable character lots of times and it's so hard to pin down his characterization but this fic got it so right! made me fall for luffy all over again and realize just how incredible he is, as both a not-hero figure and main character! definitely recommend!)

those things beyond us by Civillain

There's something different about Luffy on nights like this, nights where there's soft rain and half-moons, and when the streets are quiet; no cars or trucks, only midnight joggers or early risers taking walks to the beach.

(Where Luffy and his friends have a relationship Sabo doesn't think he'll ever be able to understand.)

(honestly, i just love all of this author's one piece works. its a modern au where the straw hats are reincarnated and find each other all in sabo's pov. it's beautiful and this is how i would picture how the straw hats would fit in a modern au. nakamaship is the best ship, no questions needed. so so good!)

Magic Paint by 8ball

Luffy sticks his hands out.

“Paint mine!”

Usopp watches the expressions on Sanji’s face. He likes watching the obvious emotions go through him like a slideshow, and it's somehow comforting that he can see the exact moment Sanji decides that going along with Luffy will be the easiest choice. So Usopp waits for Sanji to test his own nails, deem them dry enough, unscrew the tiny brush top again, and then he asks if Sanji will do his, too. And because Sanji already has the brush ready, and they’re both right there anyways, Usopp knows he’s going to get what he wants.

or the au that came from nowhere where Sanji paints his nails and everyone elses and thats really it

(*screams* the pureness, the fluff, the nakamaship!! fneiwoapfe!! the best, sweetest headcanon ever! had the biggest grin on my face the whole time i was reading this! please please read!!!)

-

[Percy Jackson & the Olympians]

Stealing Shells by the Seashore by CaffeinatedFlumadiddle

Ship: Sally Jackson/Posiedon

Sally's eyes flicked between Poseidon and then the sea below. He could feel the understanding click.

"Oh, absolutely not-"

"It isn't that high!"

"Poseidon, I am not jumping off of this cliff! I'm not doing it. I won't, you can't make me, it's very high, I am not going to-"

"If my brother sees you here, he's going to assume that you're carrying my child."

"Ridiculous. I have much higher standards."

"I also have higher standards, but he isn't going to listen to us," Poseidon reasoned. The wind blew a bit harder, and Poseidon felt the sea rise with his anxiety. "I would use my powers to hide you, but he'll sense I've used them. You'll be fine," he tried, and Sally gave something of a skeptical laugh.

"Not happening."

The lightning grew closer. For the love of-

"In that case… I'm sorry," he said. Sally tilted her head suspiciously.

"Why are you-" she began but was cut off by Poseidon shoving her off the cliff's edge. He could hear a scream. It started loud and high before getting smaller and smaller. Finally, a splash followed.

Or

Sally and Poseidon spent one summer together… and most of it was them being on the run for a godly crime they didn't commit.

(THIS is the ONLY backstory i will ever accept regarding this ship for the REST OF MY LIFE. i binged this so freaking fast and i am in love with sally as much as posiedon is. percy jackson got his Everything from his mom you can't change my fucking mind. THIS FIC NEEDS MORE ATTENTION AND KUDOS! READ!!!)

Son of Sea Foam by CaffeinatedFlumadiddle

“She’ll never claim me,” he whispered. Silena shook her head, eyes wild as she looked around for anyone who could be watching.

“My mother doesn’t remember half of her children as it is,” she said with a note of bitterness. “If you do something to impress her, it won’t matter. Return the bolt in her name. She’ll claim you if you act the part. If you stay unclaimed then they'll figure out what you really are," she said, squeezing his hands tightly. Percy's heart sped up.

"I - I don't know the first thing about Aphrodite-"

"My mother was born of sea foam," Silena cut him off. "And if you're really who I think you are... you are the sea. You can pull this off," she said and touched his cheek. "Get the bolt. Survive," she said. Percy swallowed.

"What if I can't act the part?" He asked. Silena's expression went blank for a moment. Slowly, she slipped off her bracelet and placed it in his hands.

"If you're going to be one of us... you better learn."

Or

AU where Percy has to hide the fact he's a Big Three kid otherwise he'll be killed on the spot. Unfortunately for him, unclaimed kids tend to raise the most suspicion... but he might have found a loophole in the form Aphrodite.

(one of my current obsessions rn. my eyes are constantly glued on the screen because i want to devour more of this galaxy brained fic. this author just keeps on giving and i love them for it. also, SILENA IS AMAZING AND SHE'S GETTING THE ATTENTION SHE DESERVES HELL YEAH!)

-

[Haikyuu!!]

He Waits For a Miracle by ich_bin_ein_stern

Ship: Hinata/Kageyama

A minute ago, he was on the ground after he and the others were tackled by their happily weeping senpai.

They had just beat Shiratorizawa.

And now - "Kageyama-kun? Are you paying attention?" - he's trying not to freak out because he's surrounded by distantly familiar faces while wearing a school uniform he hasn't worn in almost a year.

(TIME TRAVEL TIME TRAVEL TIME TRAVEL *screams*)

-

[The Witcher] (seriously, all my rare fandoms somehow popped up this month)

the way fire holds by theundiagnosable

Ship: Geralt/Yennefer/Jaskier

“There’s a song there, somewhere, don’t you think?” Jaskier says. “‘A witcher, a sorcerer, and a human walk into a bar’…”

(ROLE REVERSAL FIC HECK YES!! Witcher!Yennefer, Mage!Jaskier, Human!Geralt is amazing omg. It all works out so damn well and the relationship between yennefer and jaskier makes me want to cry so much. Geralt is at peak himbo greatness and it's fantastic haha! Their dynamics are just *chefs kiss* so damn good.)

The Shape of You by lirulin

Ship: Geralt/Jaskier

Some people say it's old elven magic, a remnant from before the conjunction of the spheres. Other's will say it's the last fading vestiges of chaos as the modern era slowly drives all magic and wonder out of the world. Those people are, naturally, real killjoys whom Jaskier cannot envision loving anything, but that's fine. To each their own.

Soulmate Spiritual Animal AU

(you have no idea how much i laughed when reading this fic. no idea. jaskier makes me want to scream with how much of a himbo he is and geralt, for once, is not the complete idiot between these two though it's a close call, not gonna lie.)

to grow in adversity by Soulykins

Ship: Geralt/Jaskier, Renfri & Jaskier

“For you!” Julian cried, shoving a fistful of weeds in Renfri’s direction, his smile wide and carefree. Renfri carefully took them in her hands that were only shaking a little bit now, smearing red onto green stems and yellow petals.

Julian clambered into the bed beside her and crawled halfway onto her lap. “I got you flowers, ‘cause you’re so pretty like them!”

“These aren’t flowers, they’re weeds.” Renfri told him, rolling her eyes but allowing the contact with ease. Somedays it seemed like Julian was the only person in the entire castle who wasn’t afraid of her.

“They look like flowers.” He said, crinkling his nose.

“They’re dandelions,” Renfri informed her brother with a tiny smile, “They grow everywhere, even places they perhaps shouldn’t. That’s why they’re a weed.”

“Perhaps they’re a little like you,” She teased, “Growing in even the scariest of places with no fear.” Like a monster’s heart, she doesn’t say.

“Like a superpower!” Julian gasped.

Renfri separated one dandelion from the little clutch and reached out to tuck it behind a little ear. “For the stubborn hero, Jaskier.”

(this is THE fic that got me into the witcher fandom and i can't believe i never reced this before. renfri & jaskier's siblingship is so damn good and just, the amount of effort put into their backstory and relationship makes me want to cry sometimes. and yennefer, ohoho, yennefer is at her Best here, i love her in this fic and her relationship with these siblings! geralt both makes me want to punch him and hug him, which is the norm and totally understandable hahaha! seriously, one of the best witcher fics i've ever read, please please read!)

-

[Boku no Hero Academia]

Where your love has always been enough (for me) by classicequinox

Ship: Todorki Enji/Todorki Rei

It's a dark coil of anger deep in the pit of his stomach, reminding him that he was the root, the catalyst, the trigger for their family's downward spiral. It did happen - he reminds himself harshly. He can't forget that, even if time has actually reset itself.

Todoroki Enji gets a second chance. It's up to him to see what he can do with it.

(genuinely the most believable enji i've seen regarding how he deals with his past actions and trying to be better and rei being a complicated, good person who i can see matches well with enji. really well done characterization and slow building relationship that is believable to me. enji trying to change things in a meaningful, careful manner makes me want to root for him!)

Katsuki Bakugou Makes A Friend (And Also Almost Dies, But Whatever) by Sif (Rosae)

Katsuki Bakugou is eight years old, he has no idea how he got here, where he is, or who this other kid is with him, but that's not gonna stop him from being brave and tough, just like the hero he's gonna be when he's older!

The universe has other ideas, but Katsuki Bakugou is a child made of spite, hubris, determination, and way too much nitroglycerin, so the universe can take it's ideas and shove 'em. After all, nobody out-stubborns Katsuki. Nobody.

(KID BAKUGOU & KID SHIGARAKI FRIENDSHIP! BAKUGOU STOLE MY HEART! SO SMART, SUCH A HERO! I LAUGHED AND CRIED THROUGHOUT THIS FIC, MY HEART CAN'T TAKE THIS! LITTLE SHIGARAKI MAKES A FRIEND AND IT'S TOO CUTE!!! so freaking adorable, oh lord. fneiwofpweafe)

Play The Field by lalazee for Banna_Banana

Ship: Bakugou/Midoriya

Baseball and feelings, feelings and baseball. Turns out, Bakugou and Deku are both good and bad at the same things. They try to work on it.

(look, i don't even know man. i stumbled upon this baseball au fic and the characterization is so top notch!! the backstories and feelings you get from this matches bakugou and deku's canon relationship perfectly and i flew past this so fast, god. please give this a chance, it's fantastic!)

-

[Marvel]

Blips on the Record by ambivalentangst for Bean_reads_fanfic

Flash, let it be known, doesn’t like Peter. He’s too good at everything—infuriatingly so—and nobody ever calls him on his bullshit, like with AcaDec nationals. Flash has to put his all into everything he does for a fraction of the attention Peter gets for his bare minimum, and it pisses him off, to say the least, so sue him for looking for chances here and there to knock him down a peg.

However, when he notices, he shuts his entire operation down.

Maybe Peter has a decade on his age when he was in the thick of it, but Flash remembers what it was like. He gets having school be a safe place, and nobody, not even himself, is going to jeopardize that for Peter.

//

Flash Thompson’s story is not simple, Peter Parker can always use someone else in his corner, and secrets are had and protected by all.

(flash is fleshed out! flash is getting some Good Rep! flash doing his best and being grumpy but ultimately trying to help peter in what ways he could! flash being a complex character and making me love him all over again! flash! getting some actual freaking attention fewnifoapew! THANK YOU! seriously, if you're looking for an actual good flash fic that doesn't feel disingenuous, read this!)

people were mean to you, but I always thought you were cool by suzukiblu for beckyh2112

Fandoms: Avengers & X-men

“What are your feelings on the mutant threat?!” one of the reporters shouts, and Steve just looks at him.

“I think anyone threatening mutants should be stopped,” he says calmly, and the swarm of reporters explodes, a dozen camera flashes going off at once.

(not exaggerating when i say i've reread this fic so many times that it's honestly concerning. steve & cyclop's friendship here makes me so soft?? they're both leaders of their teams and steve not being what everyone expects of him is always a soft spot for me. will forever be addicted to this fic, please enjoy!)

#notmycap by missgoalie75

Fandom: The Falcon and the Winter Soldier

In which Bucky fully embraces the 21st century and is a salty bitch on Twitter.

(nonono, you don't understand. you don't understand how much i howled and screamed in public while reading this, oh my GOD. honestly the funniest shit i've read in a VERY long time, bucky is Perfect here. fucking drag that guy you beautiful cranky soul. X'D)

[hannibard]

I recently got second hole earrings and it inspired me to write this!

Pairing: Geralt x Jaskier

Read on ao3

“Do I really have to do this?” Geralt asked as he got inside his ex-girlfriends car.

“Yes.” Yennefer answered without looking at him before turning the engine on and exiting the parking.

“Hm. Can’t I just buy you a meal instead?”

“No.”

“What about one of those unicorn dildos you wanted?”

“Tempting but still no.”

Geralt sighed and raised his hand to run it through his hair before remembering that it’s up in a bun and doing so would ruin it, so he placed it back on his lap instead.

Yennefer rolled her eyes.

“Can you maybe chill a bit? You’re the one who bet that you could eat 80 hotdogs in a row without puking and you agreed that if you lost you’d get your ears pierced.” She said, hitting him lightly on the shoulder. “A deal’s a deal, you can’t just back out now.”

Geralt let out a frustrated grunt. “In my defense I was wasted at the time, but I know.”

“Then stop being a little bitch. What are you even worried about anyways? Don’t tell me you’re scared. It doesn’t hurt much, you’re barely gonna feel it.” 

“Fuck no Yenn. I don’t mind a bit of pain, you know that.”

Yennefer turned to wink at him. “That I do.”

They were both silent for a moment as they reminisce some of the better parts of their previous romantic entanglement.

Yennefer cleared her throat and asked again. “Then what’s the fucking problem?”

“I just… I’m not sure how earrings would look on me.”

Yennefer hummed and Geralt chuckled softly. “That’s my line.”

Yennefer laughed but then turned serious. “…I personally think they’d look very sexy on you and fit with your general rocker/bordering on too much leather vibe but if you really don’t want to do this then I can find another equally torturous way for you to settle this bet but without any permanent changes to your appearance.”

Geralt was somewhat shocked to see her yield this easily but he probably shouldn’t have been. He knew how good of a person she was underneath her cold exterior and he also knew that even though things didn’t work out between them she still cared a great deal about him, the same way he still cared about her. It’s the reason they became such good friends after their inevitable separation, and she would never push him to do something outside of his boundaries. 

He smiled softly even though she can’t see it with her eyes on the road.

 “It’s fine. I made a promise and I intend to keep it.”

 …

 They arrived at the piercing/tattoo parlor soon after, Yennefer telling Geralt about a new sushi restaurant she and her girlfriend, Renfri, went to last weekend as they enter the building. They walked up to the counter where a clerk with shoulder-length curly chestnut hair was waiting to assist them. “Hello and welcome to ‘Yellow Lotus Body Art’, my name’s Triss. Do you have an appointment?”

Yennefer nodded.

Triss smiled politely. “Great, could you please give me a name?”

“Geralt Rivia.” 

“Oh, for the ear piercings right? Please wait a moment while I go check if Jaskier’s ready.” She said before disappearing behind a door.

Geralt side-eyed his friend. “You made the appointment in my name?”

“You’re the one requesting their services so isn’t it natural?”

Geralt was about to reply with something snarky when suddenly the backdoor opened and the most attractive guy Geralt had ever laid eyes on walked out.

 He was a little bit younger than him, maybe in his mid-twenties and he had short brown hair in a teen Justin Bieber type hairstyle, that while long out of fashion looked really good on him and gorgeous cornflower blue eyes that seemed to look right into his soul. 

He was wearing an oversized dress shirt with wide pink and white stripes which was messily tucked into his skinny ripped jeans that were folded at the bottom. Several of the buttons at the top of the shirt were left unbuttoned, revealing pale skin covered with a thick patch of chest hair that made Geralt’s mouth go dry.

For shoes he was sporting a pair of brown leather oxford boots that were short enough to show his ridiculous SpongeBob patterned socks. He had various jewelry on, such as a black choker and a simple silver necklace around his neck, rings on his fingers and also several piercings on his ears as well as his nose, eyebrows and one single silver stud on his chin and his arms and collarbone were covered in tattoos depicting yellow flowers (buttercups maybe? Geralt wasn’t sure), music notes and many other random designs. Last but not least, wrapped around his wrist was a bracelet with the bisexual flag on which Geralt was especially happy to see and it made his heart soar with hope.

The man looked at both Yennefer and Geralt up and down with a glint in his eye and grinned widely. “Hello there! I’m Julian but everyone calls me Jaskier. I do both piercings and tattoos here and I’m very happy to make your acquaintance.” He clapped his hands together. “So! Which one of you is Geralt?”

The pair gave him a dry look, or at least Yennefer did because Geralt’s was closer to smitten more than anything else.

“What? I didn’t want to make any assumptions.” Jaskier said sheepishly and bit his lower lip. Geralt’s eyes were immediately drawn to the gesture.

Yennefer leaned on the counter and nodded towards her ex with a roll of her eyes. “It’s him.”

“Perfect! Please follow me.” Jaskier said and led them down a hallway and inside a room. There was a tattoo chair in the middle and the younger man motioned for Geralt to sit on it.

“Triss mentioned that it’s your first time getting a piercing correct?” Jaskier asked while putting on some plastic gloves.

“Yeah.” Geralt answered and avoided eye contact trying to not stare at the guy too much, something which was proving to be quite hard.

Jaskier sighed and looked up dreamily. 

“I remember when I first had my ears pierced.” He said and started taking various small packages out from a drawer and arranging them neatly in a surgical stand next to Geralt’s chair.

“I was in middle school and the guy I liked at the time had earrings so I asked him where he got them just to start a conversation and he told me and then offered to come with me if I ever wanted to try it out so of course I said yes and after I did it I became obsessed with piercings so here I am today.”

Yennefer snorted from the doorway where she was standing with her arms crossed. “Wait, so you basically just did it for some guy?” she asked in a judgmental tone which Geralt was confused about since she literally brought him here for an even stupider reason.

Jaskier just chuckled unoffended. “Not just some guy! I lost my virginity to him not long after.” He said and started opening the packages and taking various metal tools out of them. “And I’d blame it on the fact that I was a teenager at the time but even now when I fall in love it’s always fast.” He turned and winked at Geralt. “And hard.”

Geralt’s eyes widened and he blushed. He cleared his throat trying to feign nonchalance “Hm. That doesn’t really sound fun honestly.”

Jaskier made a thoughtful sound. “Sometimes it is and other times it isn’t I guess. Depends on how the other party will respond.”

He seemed to want to say more on the subject, but he was done with the preparations and he had no reason to stall. “Before we start, I must inform you that all the tools I’m gonna use have been sterilized and sealed in those packages you saw earlier to avoid infection so you don’t have to worry about that.”

He picked up a marker and came close to Geralt to mark the place where the holes on his ears would be made. Once he was done he held a mirror in front of his client. “Is this ok?”

The older man just nodded and Jaskier put the mirror back.

 “Have you thought about what sort of earrings you’d like?”

Geralt had in fact not thought about this at all. “Not really.” He answered honestly.

“Whoa seriously? How do you even come to a place like this without deciding that first?”

“…I lost a bet.” Geralt grumbled while Yennefer laughed.

“Well I’ll have your friend here tell me all about it while you go back to the counter and choose something with Triss. Come on now, off you go!” Jaskier said and kicked him out of the room.

Geralt was worried that his newfound crush was more interested in his ex-girlfriend than him so he wasn’t really paying attention to what Triss was saying, basically letting her pick the first thing she suggested before hurriedly making his way back to the room.

As he got closer, he could hear Jaskier’s beautiful laugh and he quickened his pacing. He was about to open the door when the question the tattoo artist asked Yennefer stopped him dead in his tracks.

“So are you guys together or…?”

“No no, we’re just friends currently. Tried the whole relationship thing out long ago and it didn’t work out. Though I must inform you that I’m dating someone else at the moment but Geralt’s single if you wanna shoot your shot.” 

“I just might.” Jaskier was saying as Geralt re-entered the room. 

Two pair of eyes looked back at him and the piercer shot him a charming smile. “Welcome back big guy! Come here and show me what you’ve chosen.”

Geralt handed him the earrings and sat back down. 

“Black studs huh? Not a bad choice for your first time.” He said and picked up something that looked like scissors, leaning over Geralt.

“You ready?” he asked and Geralt took a deep breath which was the wrong thing to do because his lungs filled with Jaskier’s scent and it was intoxicating. If he had to use words to describe it he’d say it was a pleasant mix of lavender and something citrusy with a hint of sweat coming through as well. 

His heart started beating faster and he looked at Yennefer all panicked. She just raised an eyebrow in return. “What? Need me to hold your hand or something?” 

Geralt growled and looked back at Jaskier. “Just get it over with.”

Jaskier shrugged and got to work. It stung a bit, but it didn’t bother Geralt in the slightest. He actually barely noticed it with Jaskier’s close proximity and the sound of his gentle humming as he worked being all he could thing about.

After he was done, Jaskier picked up a few cotton swabs and poured some sort of clear liquid over them before using them to wipe at Geralt’s ears.

“All done!” He said after stepping back to admire his work. He gave Geralt the mirror from previously to look at the earrings himself as Yennefer came over as well.

Geralt was pleasantly surprised to note that he really liked what he saw. They were very noticeable with his hair being white and all but they didn’t make him look any less masculine as he secretly feared. Plus, they fit quite nicely with his all-black outfit that consisted of black jeans, black combat boots, a black t-shirt and a black leather jacket.

Yennefer whistled appreciatively. “I don’t know about you but I love them.”

Geralt shook his head. “No no, I feel the same way. Thanks for convincing me to do this.” He turned to Jaskier who was smiling back at him. “And thank you for everything.” 

“Just doing my job.” He said in a sing song voice and turned around, bending down to rummage through one of the lower drawers and giving Geralt a very nice view of his ass. His shirt rode up as well, making the tramp stamp of a dragonfly he had tattooed on his lower back visible and Geralt felt himself getting hotter by the second.

Yennefer noticed him looking and smirked but didn’t comment.

Jaskier stood back up and handed him a piece of paper and a small card. He pointed at the paper. “This one has instructions on what to do after you go home, though the gist of it is clean the holes with a cotton swab drenched in saline solution two to three times every day for 2 months and then you’d be able to take those earrings off and try on others.”

He then pointed at the card. “And this is the warranty for the black studs.” He said and took the gloves off, throwing them in a trash can.

“If you somehow happen to lose them, come by and we’ll just redo the process ok?” 

“Yes.” Geralt answered and cursed himself for his bad social skills. How does he keep the conversation going?

“Oh, and I also think I should give you my personal number, y’know, just in case something happens.” Jaskier added and looked up at him expectantly.

Geralt was quick to take the chance that was given to him. “I’d like that.”

Jaskier beamed at him relieved. He took back the paper and quickly scribbled his number down before handing it to him. “Have a nice day Geralt. And Yennefer too.”

“I’m honored you remembered me. Come on Geralt, let’s go pay.” Geralt smiled and gave Jaskier a small wave as he was dragged outside by his ex.

“Goodbye Jaskier.”