#in that the big ones are all fucking mediocre
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tortoise-teapot Ā· 2 months ago
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i swear i listen to other genres but i'm just going to keep making high brow looking playlists with electronic music until ppl start to take it seriously
#i could rant and fucking rave about electronic music#'it's just loops :/ it's just some gamer bro thinking he's a musician there's no skill involved ://'#my friend you have been listening to amateurs#look up savant. creo. inzo. please. i'm begging#he has some meme songs but camellia oh my god. killerbeast i love you#sakuraburst??? pls theyre masters of bait and switch tunes#ohhhh i have such a soft spot for pre-dubstep. bloody beetroots i love you#and if you want big names... (GESTURES WILDLY AT DAFT PUNK)#THEN there's the semi-electronic... irl instrument-based through an amp 'electronic'. ratatat. everyone to listen to ratatat right NOW#they toe the line between acoustic and electronic and it makes me WET. bilar???? oh my god#guess i did rant and fucking rave#i think it's s special interest?#i just got into it around 2005 and then got into the history of it#and god.#I NEED TO MAKE MY ELECTRONIC EVOLUTION PLAYLIST#ESPECIALLY DUBSTEP. THE INCREASE OF CRUNCHY SOUNDS IN INDUSTRIAL TECHNO LEADING SO SO SMOOTHLY TO DUBSTEP. THEN SKRILLEX FIRMLY SOLIDIFIED#IT AS A SUBGENRE#ok i'm fine. i'm fine i'm normal about electronic music i'm normal#god. and pour one out for the dj's that sold out to pop music. zedd your capacity for strong melody is wasted on mediocre lyrics & vocalists#go back to instrumental zedd. go back to instrumental zedd. GO BACK TO INSTRUMENTAL ZEDD#like do ppl realize that electronic music is the MOST human form of music??? these sounds DO NOT EXIST. we r MAKING SOUNDS OUT OF LIGHTNING#WE M A D E THIS#AND WE'RE WATCHING IT DRASTICALLY EVOLVE OUR O U R LIFETIMES#IT'S SUCH A GIFT??? WHY DO PEOPLE POOPOO IT????#shoutout to cascada for starting all of this for me. the true pop edm legend šŸ«”
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aniposting Ā· 6 months ago
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sometimes i remember natlan is this august and my entire body goes into shock for a millisecond
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cuntylouis Ā· 2 years ago
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I have an increasing feeling that AMC's Immortal Universe is going to end up like Universal's Dark Universe. If you remember the Dark Universe, a franchise hopeful for the Universal classic monsters that never quite came into being, you may be entitled to compensation
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deanpinterester Ā· 2 years ago
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the girl who plays chrissy in stranger things 4 looks so much like young scarlett johansson itā€™s unbelievable and itā€™s just making me think of that stupid black widow movie again and how the ONE (1) thing that mcu black widow stans have been asking for since avengers 1 is a black widow origin movie about budapest and that would have been a movie GUARANTEED to get butts in seats and thatā€™s what the movie was ALMOST about anyway and this chrissy actress would have been perfect as a young natasha (thatā€™s assuming the mcu doesnā€™t pull their young cgi face trick so they could still keep scarl*tt as the lead) but instead they gave us a dogshit movie that feels like a filler episode in a tv show ALL just because they wanted it to tie into the ~story at large~ in a phase of marvel movies thatā€™s already giving everyone superhero franchise fatigue. yeah it gave us yelena whom yā€™all love apparently but at what cost
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triple1st Ā· 1 month ago
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thinking about rassilon's (lack of) characterization in gallifrey time war
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#* ā—¦ ā Ā« š˜°š˜°š˜¤ . the poster's crusade .#rassilon is such a perfect villain for gallifrey and romana specifically#he is the embodiment of tradition of the old barbaric ways of gallifrey whereas romana is a reformist#a liberal (this is a character flaw) and more beholden to principle than actually getting anything done but still#an opposite for rassilon in every way but they never have a confrontation over their ideals#rassilon just sits in his room and decides its final sanction time between incarnations#i guess richard armitage must be expensive#it's not great folks#beyond is such a tease by having us peek into an alternative time war where romana is still lord president#and out of grief and revenge over leela's death she orders a whole inhabited solar system destroyed because dalek forces#amass within it#that's the shit i wanna hear not fucking 'i don't wanna be a time lord anymore' (pulls out chameleon arch but doesn't use it)#god when the chameleon arch was mentioned my eyes rolled back into my skull i have been poisoned by time lord ocs on here#thank god they decided to pull the 'braxiatel shows up to rescue the gang right before they die' lever for like the fifth time#i love romana's non reaction to him being devoured by the ravenous#i forgot how much they're genuinely terrible villains for a whole four boxsets but that's because the doom coalition was worse#and the eleven#anyway i've finished time war and it was very mediocre i feel like they've character assassinated romana and narvin#what happened to these two i know on narvin's end there's some character development#and it was funny seeing big finish finally give him backstory in boxset four of the eight series of gallifrey#but romana should be more insane she's too composed#all the talk of unit 117 and etra prime but she doesn't snap once#it's all so meaningless in the end#i'm not even sure i wanna start war room the theme song alone puts me off it's the worst they've had for this series#gallifrey's theme from series 4 to 6 was the best one they should've never changed it
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dravidious Ā· 1 year ago
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You're epic šŸ˜Ž
Just fought arch-tempered Lunastra today. Stupid fucking lion with its stupid fucking fire and its stupid fucking nova now it's a stupid fucking corpse. Killed it solo šŸ˜Ž
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gremlingottoosilly Ā· 28 days ago
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Barracks Bunny!Reader X Kƶnig
You stroll over the recon barracks. Walk of shame - not like you had any - with your torn panties stuffed in your pocket, not wanting to leave a trophy for a lousy fuck. He had somewhat of a nice dick - but you still feel like all that mediocre sex just isn't worth all the attention you're getting. You liked being the object of desire but then having those boys actually act on it... maybe you should take a break. Focus on yourself or some cute girls from other departments. "Whoring yourself, lamm?" Your colonel is as subtle as a hammer to the clit. As quiet as a running elephant, filled with as much gentleness as a nuclear bomb. Not the type of guy you wanted to chastise you for making poor life choices. He's not the type of guy you'd want to make mad - not with the way he can ruin your career in seconds. Force you out of the military, put a black bark over your prospects. You kind of excepted it, to be honest - you just haven't thought your colonel would actually care about something besides mauling enemies to the point of having to get them recognized by their dental carts. Konig drags you to his quarters. You think - oh, here goes the write-up, the write-down, the write-you're-dishonorably-discharged. You start to think about how you're going to tell your parents you almost got court-martialed over fucking some dudes from your squad, and then your colonel drops his pants. Well, his belt, first - the loud ring made you flinch. His pants came second, and you almost came at the sight of his cock. Big, veiny - almost as big as a human arm, making you already feel the stretch even though he isn't even remotely in yet. Sometimes, you're glad Konig isn't the one to talk a lot - you wouldn't survive having a conversation with your colonel while you can only stare at his cock, wanting to take it in your mouth as fast as possible. Konig fucks you - quick, harsh, balls slapping against your hips and making you whimper from pleasure every time. You almost think about hugging him, pressing your body closer and whispering something dirty - but then he starts talking. And talking. And fucking talking again. Groans in your ear, asks - orders - to stop fucking other guys because they don't deserve you. Can't treat you right, like you deserve it. He kisses you, over and over, so overly-romantic it almost makes you want to gag. God, you knew giving your pussy to your psycho of a colonel was a bad idea - but it's not really your fault that his dick is this good, right?
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hwan-g Ā· 3 months ago
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š‘ŗš‘Øš’€ š’€š‘¬š‘ŗ š‘»š‘¶ š‘Æš‘¬š‘Øš‘½š‘¬š‘µ (18+)
š™šĖ™ā‹†.Ėš pair. music professor! chris x fem! reader | genre. teacher/student, chrisā€™ pov, age gap, smut, dark romance, angst | warnings. power imbalance, obsession, flawed characters, profanity, unprotected sex, use of pet names, dirty talk, graphic sexual content ā€” mdni ! | word count. 8.1k
š™šĖ™ā‹†.Ėš synopsis. Iā€™m too weak to let you be, to walk away from you. Itā€™s a twisted, distorted thing, whatā€™s going on inside me. I see no end to it, no relief. Only suffering. I did this to you, my heart, and I cannot apologize. I donā€™t want to. Iā€™m jealous, Iā€™m jealous, Iā€™m wretched.
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I watch you.
Thatā€™s a new dress. You walk different in it, your hips sway like you want everyone to notice, and they fucking have. I have. Itā€™s hard not to when youā€™re so oblivious to your wanting, but I know you, I know what you want. Thereā€™s a scarf wrapped around your hair, and the boots you wear make you almost as tall as me, bring you up to my shoulders. Iā€™m jealous of your calves, how they get to carry you all throughout the day, how they lay down with you at night. Your eyes, how they stare at you from every reflection, attached to you, able to see every inch of you from up close.
Iā€™m jealous of your hands, how they brush through your hair as you sit down on the chair across from my desk, the chair youā€™ve been sitting at for three semesters now, the best view I get to have of you. The only time Iā€™m able to be so close to you without anyoneā€™s suspicion, the only time youā€™re required to answer to me and all my questions. I have so many of those, but I want to start with your skin. Is it as soft as it looks? When the air blows your way, how would you feel under my palm, shivering, a million tiny goosebumps rising on the surface?
Youā€™re talking to the girl that trails you like a lost puppy, not quite a friend, always around you, yet suddenly Iā€™m glad, because you laugh at something she said, a sound so clear, so light, it lifts the furniture and cures the wood, it builds the room and covers the cracks, pure fucking magic, until all is right again, until I am left with a gaping wound where that beautiful sound nests when itā€™s gone from the air. It suspends in my head and I let it. I canā€™t take my eyes off you. You command everything.Ā 
Satie is in your hand, what weā€™re studying, the copy I gave you, my personal one, with all my marks and annotations. You treat the pages carefully, aware of my watching you, yet you donā€™t turn to me once. You wonā€™t look at me at all. A beast rattles inside me, begging to grab you, to hold you, to never let go. I havenā€™t seen you in private for weeks and Iā€™m mad with desire, the urge to bury into your sweet cunt and wrap my hand around your warm throat, feel the pulse there, see the gasp of your mouth, the red of your tongue, your eyes on me, me, me, afraid of what I can do, of the power you give me over you, your attention, the hollow ache in my chest; Iā€™m angry at you for being happy without me while Iā€™m being tormented by your absence, no matter how small, no matter how big, and you still wonā€™t fucking look at me.Ā 
(Y/N). I think of your name how I think of God. This mythical creature that has the ability to save me. Will you? (Y/N). Look at me. Look at me.
ā€œI am tired of always dying with a broken heart.ā€ I speak this from memory and stare directly at the boy whoā€™s been tailing you lately. A mediocre student, unremarkable. Nothing at all.
You canā€™t possibly entertain him, Iā€™ve already told you this. He doesnā€™t see you, couldnā€™t possibly. Heā€™ll fuck you onceā€”even at merely the thought of this I bristle, I want to crack his fucking head openā€”and move onto the next pretty thing, blind to you, to what you are, to all you have yet to become. Itā€™s unbearable to me that no one seems to realize how incredible you are; your mind, vast in all directions, insightful, and your music compositions, profound and disturbing, the little Iā€™ve taught you and all that youā€™ve taught me, the way you hold the pen between your fingers, how you curl around your notebook, the way your eyes skim the pages Iā€™ve toiled over for five years, six more prior to becoming a professor, all leading to the beginning of this school year, how you walked in my class and brought me to my knees.
ā€œSo dramatic,ā€ someone in the back mumbles. Someone else giggles, a girl I had last year. Mundane.
I wait for your reaction, but it never comes. You stare pointedly down at my book and ignore me. Youā€™re gonna force me to get your attention some way else. Youā€™re punishing me for something, and Iā€™ve no fucking clue what. You want this. Me. Begging for you. Risking everything. My God, look at your wrists, so goddamn delicate, so small. I picture wrapping my hand around them how I did the first time I stopped you from leaving, I picture myself shaking you, demanding to know whatā€™s wrong, making you see how you make my heart bleed.
I need to know youā€™re okay. I need you to look at me.
ā€œSatie was an absurdly spiritual composer for his time,ā€ I explain, leaning against my desk, crossing my ankles, my arms over my chest. One glance at everyone else, then I stop at you. I speak to you. Let me in. Let me see you, (Y/N). ā€œA very solitary man that was capable of inventing his own religion in order to break further from society. A character like that would be a tad dramatic, albeit entirely genius, yes?ā€
ā€œHow do we study this guy? Thereā€™s nothingĀ  to learn from his techniques!ā€ Your friend shook her head, slamming the book in front of her shut. ā€œChildā€™s play. Overly simplistic. Only two noteworthy compositions in an entire career. Seriously, does anyone know anything besides Gymnopedies by him?ā€
ā€œGnossiennes,ā€ another deadpanned. ā€œYour point is shallow. He changed the tides. Music before the work you mention was entirely different from what it was after. Debussy, Poulenc, Ravelā€”all legendary figures that were deeply impressed by his so-called simplified style.ā€
A few heads nod in agreement. You remain still as ever, unmovable. What is in that brilliant little brain of yours? Why wonā€™t you share with me? I know you best of all, Iā€™d understand anything. Tell me. Tell me how a girl ruined an already troubled man, and weā€™re studying it a hundred and thirty-one years later. Tell me about obsession that rules over the mind, of the living digging graves of the dead and hugging their bones, of loneliness so haggard it chokes the air from my fucking lungs. Let me in, and Iā€™ll point at you, my Suzanne Valadon.
ā€œHe fell in love once,ā€ barely a sound, barely anything, yet itā€™s all I hear. I focus on your voice, the lull of it. Your castrating words, my baby. Youā€™re here. Youā€™re burning alive.
ā€œHe did.ā€ I jump at the opportunity to talk to you in public. Iā€™d give my blackened soul to hold your hand, to walk you to class. Theyā€™ll paint me a monster, but Iā€™d be yours, I wouldnā€™t care. Theyā€™d whisper scandal, unethical, but Iā€™d have stood next to you, defending what I feel for you, knowing very well theyā€™ve only seen a sliver of my monstrous need for you.
This is not enough for me, but I canā€™t ask for any more of it.
ā€œThey tie many meanings to us, meanings that forsaken them, per their request. Satie loved Suzanne, but only because she was the only woman that ever paid him any attention. He wanted to possess her, so that heā€™d never be alone. It was a selfish love, barely a love at all, more like a torn house looking for an exorcist.ā€
There you go. Come on. Fight with me on this. Let me hear your voice, wash over me.
ā€œYou cannot fault a man, a man of music no less, for the way he loves. We are wicked by nature, we do not possess the softness you do. Even then, Valadon was a painter, as wildly eccentric as him. She refused to be put in a box. She saw only a mirror, and in that way, she saw herself. You could say her love was narcissistic.ā€
ā€œBonjour, Biqui, bonjour!ā€ I hear somewhere from the side, but I only see you. I'm tuned in to you, your opinion about what I have to say.
I only ever care about what you think. When I grade your papers, my hands tremble to touch something so precious as your mind. I am the weakest man when it comes to you, I cave in like a house of cards. Pick me up and shuffle me. Toss me across the table, face down. Only use me, let me feel you. Visions of my cock entering you render me blind. Your voice, then. My name on your mouth as I push all the way in, right there on your desk, lights off, door locked. I canā€™t see no one but you, (Y/N), Iā€™m tortured by the memories.
Can I see you after this? Will you stay? Will you let me lock the door again?
Your eyes scorch me. They light me on fire and leave me to die, I canā€™t bear the heat of them. How have I wronged you? What did I do to get your hate? And if this is it, then give me all of it, let it be the last thing before an afterlife wandering through a black forest, cursed with only the echo of you. I love you insane, battered and bruised. I love you with a dying breath, a horrible ending.
ā€œPerhaps,ā€ you say and it takes all of my willpower not to crawl to you. ā€œPerhaps they deserved each other, in all their terrible love. Him obsessed, her always leaving. She got married to a banker. He wrote a twenty-eight second, four bar song, after all the portraits and love notes.ā€
Youā€™re humiliating me. This. What I feel for you. You havenā€™t been in my office in days, youā€™ve become a stranger to your soul, and now you come back and shame me. Youā€™ve found someone else. Who is he? Have I seen him? Iā€™ll fucking end him. Iā€™ll kill him, I swear. Donā€™t fucking test me. You donā€™t want to see that part of me, you donā€™t want to see what Iā€™m capable of doing for you.Ā 
ā€œā€˜Her whole being, lovely eyes, gentle hands,ā€™ā€ You pin me down, you stab into me. ā€œWe enter the Romantic Era, page two hundred and seventy-nine. Known characteristics of this movement: a greater emphasis on melody to sustain interest, a focus on the nocturnal, the ghostly, and terrifyingā€¦ā€
I go the entire lecture desperately trying not to stare at your face, that beautiful openness you offered me now tightly shut, entirely passive. How do I survive this, even as I know I am a grown man and should not think this way. I cannot, for the life of me, remember who I was before you walked in this room, what I was doing, why, there was no reason; you, you, you, I was waiting, maybe, an empty train station, and you the flying bullet train, cutting oxygen supply as you passed in front of me, making your stop slowly then all at once, sighing into me, giving me back my life or a semblance of it.
I assign passages and give examples, muscle memory on the piano; I grill the fucking kid that has a crush on you, I make his life miserable, and I think, thatā€™s it, thatā€™s right. You do it to me. You do it to me so easily. This is how it is to love her, man. Youā€™re not made for it, but I am. Iā€™ve survived, and sheā€™ll acknowledge it. Iā€™ll make her.
I sound childish to myself, petty. Truth is, youā€™re mine. Youā€™re fucking mine. You canā€™t do this to me.
You jot down notes, you burn through the board, you raise your hand and say all the correct answers, picture perfect student, and Iā€™m as good as dead to you. Iā€™ve been inside you, baby, you canā€™t forget that. Iā€™ve felt your warm slick clamp around my cock, Iā€™ve had your mouth on my neck moaning my name. You canā€™t get rid of me. I canā€™t rid myself of you.
I dismiss the class at eleven sharp, and call you to me. A minute, I say, about the extra credit, even as your friend eyes me, even as the boy glares at me, even as rumors have started to circulate. Sheā€™s fucking the teacher, itā€™s obvious. Sheā€™s with him all the time. Except youā€™re not, not even close, not nearly as much as I want you to be. If I had it my way, Iā€™d hold you to me so tight youā€™d become an extension of me, unable to escape me whenever you feel like.
I wait until everyone exits, then inconspicuously close the door half way, grab your arm and drag you all the way to the other side of the room. You donā€™t put up a fight, but your dress has risen on your hips, and Iā€™m suddenly furious. I pull at it and trap you against me and the wall. The lack of reaction sickens me. How is it possible Iā€™ve lost you already?
ā€œWhat the fuck have I done to you that was so bad, huh?ā€ I speak low so only you can hear, but Iā€™m boiling inside, Iā€™m as dangerous as Iā€™m hurt.
I want to fuck you senseless. Dead. I want to kill you. I want to bury inside you so deep I canā€™t ever get out. Your breathing pattern changes, you must see it on my face. I donā€™t feel like being fucked with right now. Youā€™re scared of me, but not really. I would never hurt you. Itā€™s all fantasies, all obsession. I canā€™t bear the thought of losing you is all, but I need to know whatā€™s going on. This has cost me, it will cost me even more.
I grab you by the hair, tug softly at the ends, and your chin lifts. I trace it. Your eyes widen a fraction but you donā€™t give in, not yet. I press my erection against you, I breathe like a wild animal. Youā€™re so small in my arms, I could do whatever I want with you. Youā€™d let me. You have already. I just need to find that girl in you again, pull her out.
ā€œI wonā€™t be the teacherā€™s slut,ā€ you spit out, your lips cherry red and begging to be kissed.
ā€œToo fucking late, isnā€™t it?ā€
You try to push me away but I keep you there, your wrists above your head, your face close to mine. Iā€™m lost on you, my mouth goes for the soft skin of your earlobe, I suck on it and feel you melt, I move to your neck and you let me, youā€™re rubbing your thighs together, youā€™re begging for friction. I have to close the door. I have to close the door and make sure Iā€™m quick. Classes are still in session on this side of the building. I canā€™t let myself get sloppy. Iā€™m not gonna risk losing this.
I bite on your neck and you gasp. Iā€™m hard for you. My free hand reaches under your dress, cups you over the thin fabric of your underwear. Wet, goddamn soaked. A string of curses escapes me, as I glance back at the door.
ā€œStay here, donā€™t fucking move.ā€
I take four long strides and lock the damned thing separating us and them, though I know I still have to be quick with you. I held you back in front of the entire class. Itā€™s already been a considerable amount of time for a simple back and forth.
ā€œI can come back later,ā€ you say as I near you again. ā€œAfter hours.ā€
In my office, where itā€™s private and secluded. Where no one will interrupt us or hear us. What youā€™re suggesting is more sane than what I want to do right now. The logical part of my brain wants to agree. The rest of me lifts your dress and shoves two fingers where I know you want them the most. You writhe against me, and hook your thigh around my hip, opening. Thatā€™s it. I knew thatā€™s all you needed. Itā€™d been too long, that was all. I just had to show you how good it is again.
Thereā€™s my good girl. Fucking yourself on my digits, your cunt throbbing for my cock.
ā€œI need you, please, please, please, pleaseā€¦ā€
I cup your breast in my palm, free your nipple with my teeth and bite on it. You hiss, and say my name. I almost finish in my pants, hearing that filthy mouth mutter my name, but your hands are quicker, theyā€™re unzipping and pulling me out, red veins popping, leaking precum, hard as a fucking rock. I want to tear you apart, I want you to feel me for days after.
You jump in my arms and I lift you up. You guide me inside, and I slip into you so easily. A well rehearsed game between us, how fast we can fuck, the thrill of getting caught too great, the adrenaline rushing through my veins pistoling through you, and I pump, I fuck your little soaking cunt until youā€™re a blabbering mess, until all you can moan is yes yes yes, just like that, right there, right there, and I know where that is, I got you, Iā€™ll take care of you, Iā€™ve done it so many times before.
Where did you think of going? No one can give this to you better than me. You love my cock. Thereā€™s no other girl that will do it for me like you do. I tell you this, my forehead dropping to meet yours, your mouth seeking mine. I kiss you, my tongue tasting the strawberry bubblegum you were chewing on earlier, my dick impossibly hard. Youā€™re milking me dry, youā€™re so horny, I never want to stop, (Y/N).
ā€œIā€™ll never get sick of how your body responds to me, baby. Come on. I know youā€™re close.ā€
You get so whiny when youā€™re on the verge, your voice raspy from all the hard breathing, and I meet you thrust to thrust, I fuck into you with all I have until I shoot inside you, until my arms give out and I have to lay you on the closest desk, and still I donā€™t stop, I keep going until I feel your cream, until I reach between us and shove it all inside you, three fingers this time, then kneel down and taste us. Youā€™re so far gone by that point, and Iā€™m distantly aware that weā€™ve overstayed our time.
I canā€™t bring myself to care. I want you. I want you so much, my heart is screaming at me. I need to eat you out until youā€™re coming apart for me again. My hand shoots up and grabs your throat to pull you to sit up, rough, how you like it. Your face is flushed, your hair a mess. Iā€™m proud I got you looking this way. My seed will be inside you for days, you wonā€™t be able to wash it out. I lift your dress once more, your smooth, swollen cunt fucked nice and raw, before I give it a stern slap and bring your underwear over your other leg, dressing you.
We smell like sex. I know weā€™re not careful anymore. I canā€™t bring myself to care. Sometimes it happens, itā€™s a good enough excuse. This, between us. Especially between us. Weā€™re two consenting adults. There was no way to escape you. There was nothing I couldā€™ve done. You grew roots inside me and have been growing ever since.
ā€œCome visit me tonight,ā€ I tell you as I walk you to the door. I unlock briskly, and look outside, left then right.Ā 
No one within earshot.
ā€œPerhaps we shouldā€¦ā€ I look at you. Whateverā€™s in my gaze, makes you pause. ā€œDonā€™t look at me like that. I canā€™t get a reputation, Chris. I wonā€™t.ā€
ā€œTwo minutes ago you told me to call you a good-for-nothing fucking whore as I fucked you dumb. I think weā€™re past lying to ourselves, yeah, baby?ā€
You blush and look down. ā€œI justā€¦ā€
ā€œDo I need to put you on all fours?ā€
ā€œThatā€™s not fair. You canā€™t wave sex in my face and get me to stay.ā€
I retreat like a wounded dog at your feet. ā€œIs that what Iā€™m doing?ā€ I ask you honestly, Heaven and Hell fighting inside me. Yes, one side says while the other soothes, youā€™ve done only what you know. Youā€™ve been desperate, clinging onto whatever scraps she throws at you.
You kiss me suddenly, your hand resting on the nape of my neck, pulling me down. I move away a burned man. The door is wide open. You study my reaction and sigh. I canā€™t help but feel this was some sort of test and I just failed terribly.
I have more to lose than you, a regrettable and bitter realization. If the board takes this entirely the wrong way, I could get fired and my license suspended. The power imbalance is too much. If I canā€™t teach, I wonā€™t be able to see you how I want to. Youā€™ll be here and Iā€™ll be God knows where. You want to protect me. I havenā€™t been doing the same. Iā€™ve been taking and taking, Iā€™ve been the selfish one.
ā€œGo,ā€ I whisper. ā€œLeave.ā€
ā€œChrisā€¦we can stillā€”ā€
ā€œFor fuckā€™s sake, do what youā€™re told for once!ā€
You run away from me faster than you ever have before. And for once, I donā€™t feel like stopping you. My body is another story. My hands tremble at my sides, my fists clenched so tight Iā€™m afraid to move.
I want to hit something. Anything. I want you back here, telling me itā€™s okay, no one will know, not if weā€™re careful, not if we keep our distance otherwise. How I say yes, yes, as long as I get to have you like this, as long as I can get lost in you, and how I lay you down, how I never once thought of the consequences then.
Night comes, and weā€™re back to this. You, knocking softly on my door, and me, forever answering to your summoning, forever bound by the chains that lead only to you. The hallways are dark, the rest of the faculty having locked up long before, probably enjoying dinner in the common room, wondering once again where I am, why I never join them, how Iā€™m no better than the rest, despite teaching Music Theory at one of the oldest universities at my twenty-nine years. Iā€™ve earned my time of solitude. I donā€™t need to answer to anyone.
Anyone but you, (Y/N).
I hug you to me, and pull you inside, locking behind us. Youā€™re tender in my hands, so impossibly soft, and I feel your melancholy mood, your glistening eyes, full of unshed tears. I wipe at them, I kiss them until theyā€™re mine, I pacify you by whispering your name, very very quietly, my baby girl, so I can convince you that this is real, that you will never lose me, that I have nowhere else to go but you. That I would choose you over and over, that Iā€™m so fucking sorry I ever made you doubt this singular truth.
How I regret meeting you under these circumstances, and if I had it my way, weā€™d be moving in together by now, weā€™d be browsing for a couch and a dining table. You laugh at that and call me silly. I donā€™t care. I got you to laugh, I shook the dreaded uncertainty away. I would do anything for you, my heart.
I sit you down in my chair and get on my knees. Your hand reaches out and I keep mine at your hips, afraid of all the things I want to do to you, with you. Your skirt is black, it reaches just above your knee; all that expanse of naked skin, smooth and unbearable. I rest my head on your lap, the stubble of my jaw rubbing against it, and you shiver, your breath turning quick, excited to have me so close to your core.
ā€œDid you shower?ā€ I ask you, getting hard at the thought of you walking around all day with my scent on every inch of you.
I feel you shake your head, and I smile, kissing the side of your thigh, fingers roaming down down down, the curve of your calf, down down down, your ankle, the delicate bone there. I stretch your leg and kiss all that I can. I smell your arousal, Iā€™m so close to where I wanna be. You exhale a small breath, and I look at you. Your eyes have gone dark, wanting. My baby. I know you. I got you.
ā€œTake your jacket off, let me see you.ā€
You comply, and I give you time. I make space in my desk, I turn off the lamp, I drench you in absence. All the while my need grows savage, my stomach knots. I feel like a fucking teenager, so eager to slip into warm pussy and never come out. Your warm pussy. For me, only yours.
When I turn around again, youā€™re taking off your skirt. No underwear. My body goes taunt, I all but fucking growl, as I grab you and smash our mouths together. My fucking girl, mine mine mine, you exist only for me, Iā€™m going to fuck you so good, Iā€™m going to eat you alive.
ā€œI did it for you,ā€ you mumble on my skin, shy, and I put you on the desk, open your legs wide. ā€œIā€™ve never done it before.ā€
I dive right into the heat of you. Wet and sweet and slightly musky. So filthy. I love you, every part of me beats this. I love you like this, I love you, I love you. I suck your clit in my mouth, nibble it, bite it. You gasp and moan and move, your fingers in my hair, pushing me away, pulling me closer. Youā€™re a tide, Iā€™m at your mercy. My tongue slips in your hole, and I get to fuck you like this too. Iā€™m so lucky. Iā€™m so fucking privileged that itā€™s you under me. No one will ever compare again.
Youā€™ve ruined me for everyone else.
What we do after thisā€”you come, violent and thrashing, and I drink every last drop, a thirsty beast at your feet, under trance, under powerful spells and your smell, your smell, baby, your juices. Iā€™m parched. I canā€™t get enough, Iā€™m greedy, I ache all over; I pull you up and I kiss you. I kiss you and I die. You want to get down, you say, you want me in your mouth. Youā€™re so impatient, so hungry, my love. I deny you nothing.
I grab your hair into a makeshift ponytail and let you undress me. Your fingers, working my buttons, lowering, strokingā€”I close my eyes, the picture of you etched behind my eyelidsā€”I see you, stuffed with cock, slurped cunt satiated; youā€™re orgasmic, baby, I contemplate shoving your face on my carpet and taking you from behind, tight and ready for me. I groan, fuck your face until I see white, slapping your red cheeks, spitting in your mouth and shoving myself back in there. Youā€™ve unlocked something primal in me and youā€™re enabling it, because you love having sex like this, you love being told what to do, you love being manhandled.
At the sight of you crying, I bust. You swallow everything. ā€œFuck, baby, god fucking damn meā€¦ā€ as I get on your level and wipe your face, lick the salt off your tears, bruise your lips. I take you in my arms and you fall against me, exhausted. I lay you down slowly, an angel being consumed by sin, me the devil, the defiler, and for a moment Iā€™m ashamed; I took you a sophomore, music only your minor, literature your true passion, where your loyalty lied, and I changed your entire plan. I didnā€™t mean to. I only wanted to keep seeing you, to hear more of what you have to say, to witness it first hand, mere steps from you, so close I could touch, so close I could reach you.
The piano lessons I gave you in those first months, the stolen touches, glimpses of your profile as you learned the keys, as I explained the five finger scale, and then your first song, your second, the way you kept getting better and better, the fastest student Iā€™ve ever had, your ability to write music with no idea how to play it. Teaching you was falling in love with you. It couldnā€™t have happened any other way. As I stare at you underneath me, hair fanning around your fucked out face, all I wanna do is lay next to you and fall asleep.Ā 
Watching you sleep. Being next to you, trusting me with your eyes closedā€”I canā€™t have it like this. Youā€™ve never stayed the night. Iā€™ve never let you. Itā€™s my responsibility to keep you safe from what Iā€™ve dragged you into. It can only go so far until I stop it. I do it with my heart breaking, an open cage. This emotion slams into me, like Iā€™m holding you back from some amazing thing somewhere else, anywhere else, like you could have more; all this could ever be is this dark room with the lock in place, the piano on the side, quiet, in the dead of nothing. Youā€™re attached to a ghost, you love no one.
Iā€™m jealous of your shadow, how it follows you around unbothered, with no shame. My head would hang, a pariah paraded, theyā€™d throw stones, scream names. Itā€™d be all they see, all theyā€™d talk aboutā€”see this girl, sheā€™d disappear every evening, and after class, yeah, so many people saw her, sheā€™d chase after him like a lost puppy, what a strange thingā€”but it was me chasing, itā€™s me lost, the sick dog begging at your doorstep, the stranger, the disturbing.
ā€œChris?ā€
I dig my nails in your hips and lift you up, flip you around, press on your back, your ass flush against my hardening length. I refuse to let you see the monster. Iā€™m too weak to let you be, to walk away from you. Itā€™s a twisted, distorted thing, whatā€™s going on inside me. I see no end to it, no relief. Only suffering. I did this to you, my heart, and I cannot apologize. I donā€™t want to. Iā€™m jealous, Iā€™m jealous, Iā€™m wretched.
You reach and grab me from behind, rubbing your slick, coating me in your wetness. Iā€™m in shambles, baby, and canā€™t you tell? You hold me by the balls. I canā€™t see anything but you. Iā€™m dying. Youā€™re killing me. I enter you, dripping, bleeding. You whimper, backing up to meet me, and I bottom out. Being inside you like this, Iā€™m burning in the last circle of hell. Thereā€™s nothing as agonizing, no form of torture more severe.Ā 
Itā€™s here, like this, when I can truly lose myself entirely, where I can let go of any inhibitions; I am not a professor or a member of fuck all, or even a person, Iā€™m nowhere near a man, surely, instead almost completely animal, because I fuck you, Iā€™m getting what I want, I pistol into you, a mad thing, a predator, and I lean my body to cover yours, my mouth breathing hot over your ear, and youā€™re whining, youā€™re sobbing onto the carpet, where Iā€™ve taken you over and over and over again, my perfect fucking girl, perfect little whore, how you fucking like it, yeah, just like this, helpless, desperateā€”yes, yes, please, please, Godā€”Iā€™m going to fucking ruin you, (Y/N), feel this fucking cock, so fucking full of me, babyā€”Iā€™m gonna come, Iā€™m gonna fucking come, Chris, donā€™t stop, please, please, pleaseā€”
ā€œStop begging,ā€ I groan into your skin, biting your shoulder, lifting you entire as I shove myself in you. ā€œStop fucking begging. Clamp me. Drain me, baby, come on.ā€
ā€œI canā€™t, I canā€™tā€”ā€
Iā€™m digging into you, Iā€™m scavenging, exorcizing. This is the roughest Iā€™ve ever had you, and youā€™re taking it all so well. Iā€™m swelling with pride, I feel so deeply for how your body receives me that I canā€™t hold out any longer. You let me come inside every time. I know youā€™re on the pill, but my mind races, primal instincts and caveman thoughtsā€”you, swollen with my child, naked, always naked, as I slowly make love to you, staring into the face of my truth, my only right, the only thing I can never regretā€”youā€™re so goddamn beautiful it hurts.
ā€œI love the way your come drips down my thighs,ā€ you say breathless, lost in your lust. Iā€™m still moving inside you, still so fucking horny for you. ā€œI sound insane.ā€
I collapse next to you, but keep your back tight against my chest, lifting your leg to keep fucking into your warmth, unable to stop. Sweat runs down my brow. Iā€™m never not impossibly hard for you. No matter how many times I have you, no matter how aggressive I am, how brutalā€”you take it all, you fucking amazing girl. My death.Ā 
ā€œTell me,ā€ I rasp. ā€œI could do this all night, (Y/N). Say the fucking word.ā€
You tilt your neck and kiss me. I salvage your mouth, run my tongue over the roof of it, and your hole engulfs me. Your pussy tightens, refuses to let go.
ā€œKeep fucking me,ā€ you whisper, avoiding my eyes, embarrassed. ā€œIā€™m so close, Chris.ā€
ā€œTell me what you need, baby. Let me hear you.ā€
You mewl, and turn away from me. I quicken my pace again, this position allowing me to get deeper, and I do, I ram into you hard and fast, just how you like it, and your voice propels me, it drives me crazy, it wraps my arm around your neck and chokes.
ā€œYour cockā€¦I need it so bad, I crave it every nightā€¦please, Chris, donā€™t stop, donā€™t fucking stopā€¦ā€
ā€œThatā€™s my fucking girl. Come on, baby, come onā€¦ā€
I need to fucking taste you, I canā€™t wait any longer. I slip out of you, your wail of protest loud enough that I have to slap my palm over your mouth, slap your fucking face for disobeying the one rule Iā€™ve set for you.
And then I dive right into your raw cunt. I slurp and lick and lap, so wet I have to reach down and stroke my dick, the sound of you so fucking filthy itā€™s pornographic. I growl and spit on my palm, masturbating to the sight in front of me. You climax with a gasp, and I persevere through all of it, keeping you still, but desperate for a last dip.
Once, twice, I slam back inside, and scramble to come on your stomach, thick spurts shooting out, my vision blurry, my chest heavy. A fucking mirage, covered in my cum, spent and destroyed. I love you. I love you.
ā€œIā€™m goddamned obsessed with you,ā€ I confess, falling back on my heels, breathing ruggedly, running a hand through my hair. Youā€™re a mess all over. My fucking cumdoll. ā€œI am a ruined man, (Y/N). I canā€™t think of nothing else except this. How I can spend the most amount of my time inside you.ā€
You laugh, and bite your lip, closing your legs on me. I slap them open, stare at what I created, a visceral feeling tearing through me. I want to cut you down, slip myself inside you, wear your skin as mine. Iā€™m the insane one, not you. You were made to want, while my wishes condemn me.
ā€œYouā€™re never fucking leaving me,ā€ Iā€™m not proud to admit this toxic, acid thought. ā€œI wonā€™t survive it if you do. Youā€™re stuck, do you understand? Iā€™m not going to apologize, and Iā€™ll never mention it again, but,ā€ I rub my thumb on the inside of your thigh, braving a glance at your spent face. Youā€™re scared, you love me. Youā€™re afraid of the fact. ā€œWhat we haveā€¦ itā€™s not fucking normal, (Y/N). I can barely explain it myself. I need to fucking possess you, baby; I have terrible, god-forsaken thoughts ofā€”of crawling inside your bones and carving a place for me there, a place I can never escape.ā€
I kiss your wet cheeks and wrap myself around you. I rest my head on your stomach, and close my burning eyes; I listen to your heartbeat, your deep breathing. Youā€™re falling asleep, but still, your fingers reach down and soothe my demons away. Iā€™m so devastated by you, (Y/N). I have ruined my entire life to have you. It is the highest form of happiness, the worst imaginable punishment. I need you like I need my own breath.
I drift off with my cock erect, and tears running down my face. It will never be easy, will it? Being close to you.Ā 
It shakes the very fucking foundation of me.
They find out eventually, as we always knew they would.
The board of trustees propose a meeting, a formality, really, since Iā€™m well aware of the rules of the school, and the ethical standpoint of these kinds of things. Iā€™m the big bad monster that seduced you, and you hold no power over me. What do they fucking know, as I stare each of them in the eye and accept their decision. What do they fucking know. You havenā€™t come to class in four days. Are you okay? Are you embarrassed of us?
ā€œSeeing as you are both adults, Iā€™m sure we can end this unfortunate event amicably. Miss (Y/L/N) will willingly withdraw from your class, and you will be taking an extensive absence of leave for the rest of the semester. The councilā€™s vote was unanimous on thisā€”as a brilliant established member of the university, and a graduate of it, as such, we find it a grave disadvantage to us to let you go. Therefore, an exception has been made. Do you agree with this?ā€
I have no choice. I pray for whoever tipped off the Chancellor that I never find them. A severe thought crosses my mindā€”theyā€™ve taken you from me. How will I be able to see you now? What will become of us if we are found disregarding their rules again? Surely death. I couldnā€™t possibly bear a different kind of separation, one where I lose you beyond just the classroom. Itā€™s unimaginable and it fills me with a freezing dread, a pure horror that I feel down to my fucking core.
ā€œWill you guarantee that this will be kept under wraps? (Y/N)ā€”Miss (Y/L/N) is an exceptional student, one that does not deserve the public outrage something like this would cause her,ā€ I keep my face straight, my expression contained. ā€œIt was a mishap, a lack of judgment on my part, nothing more. She remains a brilliant girl, and I wish for nothing more than to see her excel and graduate with utmost respect.ā€
ā€œOf course. This is a private matter. But, Mr. Bahng, if we receive a similar document againā€¦ you understand our position, surely?ā€
One last time. I need to see you one last time.
ā€œCertainly. Thank you for your time.ā€
Your phone sends me straight to voicemail. Iā€™m not brave enough to try your dorm room, not with all those girls in there and their judgy eyes, and you refuse to step foot in my class even though you still have two lectures before weā€™re both to leave. They mustā€™ve told you it was better to stay away for a bit, as to not make it so obvious, and yet I cannot for the life of me see the logic behind you being so far away from me, where I canā€™t reach you.
Iā€™ve told you this. It wonā€™t end well if I lose you.
I am over myself. I look for you everywhere. I see you in everything, in my dreams, to what little I manage to sleep, in the corners of my office, all the places Iā€™ve had you writhing underneath me, your seat in the very front now occupied by that stupid boyā€”they all seem to know. Not for certain, but itā€™s in the glint of their eyes, the silences your voice would fill with such certainty it would steal my fucking breath away.
I ignore them all. I DONā€™T HAVE YOU, I want to scream at them. My worst nightmare came true, and I can only remember your sweet laugh as Iā€™d bite on your neck, your honey exclamationā€”oh, it tickles!ā€”as I did it over and over again. I can only remember the warmth of your cunt, the vivid smell of it, and your heart, the fluttering of it against my chest, how I held you to me, and you were safe from all of them, how we shouldā€™ve stayed in that office and never unlocked the door.
Leave a message after the tone. Beep.
ā€œAnswer your fucking phone, (Y/N). Youā€™re driving me crazy.ā€
A day later, there you are, getting coffee, a book in your hand, your entire face smiling, so kind it messes with my head, the inner workings of my chest cavity.
I watch you from afar, notice how absentminded you look, how ignorant I mustā€™ve been those past few days thinking this all hasnā€™t meant a thing to you, because itā€™s always been in the little things your face makes. Your tells, the things that give you away. How you listen without having heard a thing, how you play with your hair when youā€™re nervous. Iā€™ve noticed them all, my love, and I can tell right now, that youā€™re thinking of me.
I think of approaching you, of showing myself to you, but itā€™s too soon. I canā€™t walk up to you in public, not on campus. I weigh the risk, the consequencesā€”theyā€™re the same, they havenā€™t changed, because to me this was always the outcome, this was always the end of us.
I call your name in my grief. Only to myself, a gentle summoning, just so I can pretend your name still belongs in my mouth. It does. It always will.
You do not see me. Or, if you do, you pretend not to. I canā€™t be sure which hurts more. You shatter me.
I try again the next day, a Saturday. As soon as weā€™re out of school grounds, a good distance away, I pinch the fabric of your jacket, jilting you. You turn around terrifiedā€”this is how I feel, I want to yell and shake you.
Alone, lost, in a labyrinth where I cannot find myself, I cannot find you. Endless loops, unbearable darkness.
ā€œWe canā€™t do this,ā€ you say immediately, flinching away from me. From me. Iā€™m ugly then, Iā€™m dangerous, I canā€™t seem to control my temper. ā€œI told you we canā€™t do this.ā€
I lunge for you, I grab your face in my hands, and force your ruinous eyes to look into my blind ones. Iā€™ve seen nothing since that night we slept together. Iā€™ve been walking around without knowing what day it is, without direction.
ā€œIā€™ve called you,ā€ I rasp. ā€œWhereā€™s your goddamn phone?ā€
ā€œI didnā€™t want to talk to you.ā€
Oh, my baby. Youā€™re sick with grief, arenā€™t you? Just like me. Your eyes are raw underneath all that black liner.
Still, I ask, ā€œWhy?ā€
You place your hands on top of mine, and remove them slowly. I cherish even your rejection. At least youā€™re here, in front of me, corporeal and talking to me.
ā€œI got off easy,ā€ you admit, head dropping in regret. ā€œI didnā€™t know what they did to you, I didnā€™t want to make it worse.ā€
ā€œI canā€™t be near you. They sent me on ā€˜vacationā€™.ā€
You nod, and it takes every last bit of willpower to not smash you into my chest and keep you there, safe and sound.
ā€œIt will never be the same between us, will it?ā€ You sound so eternally sad. I want to fix it. Fix all of it.
But I canā€™t. And it eats me alive.
ā€œIt will not.ā€ In admitting this, I lose a piece of myself. My heart wails.
Look at me again, (Y/N). Meet me halfway and Iā€™ll always choose you. Nothing has changed for me. Meet my eyes, see that I love you. That Iā€™ve loved you from the beginning, that I was made to love you, that nothing ever existed before you, and that I cannot see in front of me.
ā€œThen, we should end it.ā€Ā 
No. No.
ā€œIf we end it once and for all hereā€”ā€
ā€œI wonā€™t,ā€ I say, keeping my hands to myself, biting down my anger, the pain rising up to choke me. ā€œEnd it? What does thatā€”Iā€™ve buried myself in you, (Y/N). Youā€™re in me like my own fucking spirit. End it? This will never end. We can never end.ā€
I got you crying now. As much as it tugs at me, Iā€™m glad of your tears. They show you care, that you donā€™t really believe the bullshit words coming out of your mouth. I wonā€™t hear any of it, I fucking wonā€™t. You reach for any part of me to hold, fingers lifting in desperate attempt, and I pull you to me by the nape of your neck, our bodies crushing, the wave coming up to meet the shore.
Iā€™ll remain astute as you come and go. You donā€™t have any choice but to return. Itā€™s where you belong. With me, I whisper in your hair. Stay with me.
ā€œTo what end?ā€ You mumble, your voice broken with emotion.
I bring my other arm around you, hold you close against me. ā€œOurs. Until Iā€™m dead. Thereā€™s no one else for me, baby. You. Itā€™s always gonna be you.ā€
You wonā€™t hear any of it. ā€œI canā€™t ask you to do this for me, Chris.ā€
I silence you, kiss your forehead, your eyelids. ā€œThis is for me. Iā€™m the fuckingā€” Iā€™m the selfish son of a bitch that canā€™t quit you. If it happens again, Iā€™ll resign,ā€ I made a promise to myself then. ā€œIā€™ll resign and wait for you to graduate. Once you do, weā€™ll leave this damned place and go wherever you want. Iā€™ll take care of you, you know that right?ā€
You nod, and I feel your fists bunching the material of my shirt, as if being this impossibly close isnā€™t enough for you. As if youā€™d wear my own clothes if you could, coexist in this body of mine. Thatā€™s all Iā€™ve been asking for, you know. To somehow become one entity, to never have to part from you.
Why were our souls split? Not ours, I think bitterly. Ours shouldā€™ve never parted. What a cataclysmic event it mustā€™ve been.
ā€œIā€™ll rent an apartment, Iā€™ll leave campus,ā€ I whisper my plans to you, as we walk along the maple trees wrapped in each otherā€™s arms. ā€œItā€™ll be ours, you can come whenever you please. Youā€™ll have your own key.ā€
ā€œIā€™ll buy my stupid couch and a matching coffee table,ā€ you laugh softly, and Iā€™m ready. Iā€™m sure about this.
I need you to be happy like this, to not have a care in the world. Iā€™ll make it happen, I fucking swear it to you, my heart.
ā€œAnd the island chairs, and ridiculous knick knacks that I wonā€™t have a say over?ā€
Your unadulterated giggles set me on fire. ā€œAll of them, yes! Itā€™ll be out of an IKEA catalog.ā€
All I want, all I wantā€”my very soul beats this. A life with you. Beyond the class. Itā€™s always been beyond it.
I say this to you that evening, as I make love to you in a borrowed bed, my name coming from your lips still the sweetest sound Iā€™ve ever had the privilege to hear. My heartā€™s song, the greatest one. The rise and fall of your breath. My own. Its unique composition.
I love you. I love you so much my chest bleeds open with the truth of it. Iā€™ll gladly run dry at your feet.Ā 
ā€œYouā€™re everything, (Y/N). Youā€™re everything.ā€
Nothing will ever take you from me. Not even death itself. Especially death.
I will find you there as well, if I have to.Ā 
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monstersflashlight Ā· 2 months ago
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Ma'am please i beg, something about a war hero virgin monster of any kind letting loose all his pent up desire on brothel madame reader... maybe stealing her away (or inviting all his comrades to join in hehe)
Hi anon! It turned a lot more sweet than expected, but I think it's pretty great. Hope you like it! <3
Orc x fem!reader
You tried to fuck him so many times before, he always came into the brothel and talked with you, but was never interested in your advances. Until one day, when he was drunk, he confessed he was a virgin and didnā€™t want to disappoint you being mediocre at it. You chuckled and he never talked about it again. Thatā€™s why it surprised you so much when before going to war, he promised you heā€™d be back for you. He would win and bring a victory to the clan, and then youā€™d be his price.
You knew you wanted him, you knew his promise would be what would make you pain and anguish until he came back, anticipation and dread filling you every day that passed and he didnā€™t appear. It was an insufferable torture to wait for him, to be there and direct everything, one eye always on the door to see if he crossed. One of your girls always at the door in case news arrived from the fort and he was dead. You pained, and waitedā€¦
And then a loud crash sounded in the main bar as you were doing some paperwork. You heard your nae being called so loud the walls vibrated with the force of it. It was all it took for you to know.
He was home. He won and he was there to conquer his price. He was there to conquerā€¦ you.
You exited your office at the same time he came barreling to get you. When he approached and threw you over his shoulder you barely made a sound, already prepared to give your everything to him. He carried you away between the whistles and excited rumble of all your girls and patrons. You wanted to chuckle, but the anticipation and pent up sexual desire was driving you insane, stopping you mustering any kind of sound.
He took you to his cabin at the edge of the town, not too far away from your brothel. He kicked the door open and walked right to his bedroom, he threw you over it and ordered you to strip. You did it without arguing, you were as ready for it as he was. He ripped off his clothes, his eyes never leaving your body. The moment his erection sprung free you had to swallow a moan. He was so big. Way too big. You didnā€™t even know if he could fit inside, but you were nothing but an overachiever.
He looked at you for a long moment, but before you could say anything, he was over you, too eager and inexperienced, but his excitement covered for it. He kissed your breasts, your abdomen, and when he arrived to your pussy, you grabbed his hair hard and he stopped. You told him softly that you knew, and watched how his green face got darker because of his embarrassment. You smiled at him and told him to go slow, to enjoy it as he would of a nice dessert. And good goddess he did. He ate you out with abandon, not fine caress, not really any technique behind it, but he was so good, his tusks around your labia and your clit being sucked and licked. It was a low burn that turned you into a mess of babbling groans and moans.
He didnā€™t last long, though. Soon after, way before you were ready, he was covering your body and trying to fit inside. You shushed him and pushed him onto his back, attacking his mouth as you rubbed your dripping pussy over his huge green dick. He moaned, and you felt more of his precum making a mess out of both of you. It was exhilarating to have such a big monster under you, so desperate to get inside of you. It was like anything youā€™ve ever felt before.
You got his tip inside and felt how he shoot inside your pussy, way too soon, getting embarrassed by his eagerness. You chucked and assured him it was normal for a virgin to spill in the first moments. But he was still hard, so you continued even though he kept begging and saying it was too much. But he didnā€™t stop you. You lowered your hips until they were flushed against his pelvis, rolling them and crying out because of how good it felt. He came again, but didnā€™t go soft. You rode him like a savage, but it was still not enough, and soon after he was turning you and pushing you onto the mattress, fucking you like a piston as you moaned his name. You came three times, and he flooded you with his cum, kissing you at the same time, claiming you completely.
He claimed you. He claimed his prize.
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strawberryvanillafrosting Ā· 10 months ago
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success life story ā™”
heyy i'm here to share about my success story, the beginning is only before i started manifesting and about when i just started, all my success are on the very end of the blog, so feel free to skip directly at it if you're not interest by all the rambling !
have a good read ā˜†
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michiko is so pretty, i've literally been told so many times i looked liker <3
the old story that i donā€™t live in anymore
okay so before i didnā€™t hate my life, at all, but i just found very dull and so poor of entertaining like it was just too fucking regular and repetitive.also a bit depressing. i thought of myself of such an unlucky girl before and i was like affirming all the fucking time that i was unlucky and guess what? everything really used to go the way i didnā€™t want it to go every single damn time and iā€™d be like i knew it im so unlucky boo-hoo.
same for the money i would just go every single fucking day rambling to my friends how poor i was and how i wanted money so bad and the same story every single fucking for days, weeks, months.
i really wanted a new appartement and my own room cause i used to share same room as my sister and it really was getting on my nerves, i had no privacy and place for myself. the apartment was small, my mum always kept complaining about it and then she would argue about my dad about it but the reason why we couldnā€™t move out despite trying for several months was cause my dad had whole lotta debts and my mom had a really low paying and hard job she was exhausted and, it was quiet hard to see them being this unhappy and they still tried their hardest to make us happy so i really wanted to get back at them.
about social life i had very few friends and barely went out, i'd say probably one time a month. and i really wanted to get that life of the party, and those big ass friends group and also i was crazy desperate about having black friends cause i am black and literally the only black out here without none of black friends and i felt pretty left out like wtf am i the only black girl with no black friends cause all of them (that's so dumb tho.. ) were friends and gets invited to the most fun hangouts and i was embarrassingly jealous of that and also complained a lot about itā€¦and kept asking tf was wrong with me.
STRONGLY on this one : i wanted a relationship so bad and i kept hating and being sad to those couple on tiktokā€™s. one time i actually cried cuz i wanted a boysā€™s love so bad like i was craving it so bad. i was in such despair state before..cringy ahh ā˜ ļø
i used to be rlly insecure about my looks too even tho at some moments i felt more confident, i kept comparing myself and waisting dozens of minutes enumerating my "flaws ". i knew about manifestation but not really about law of assumption , for me manifesting was really all about listening to subliminals, method and scripting. we all once knew that phase yeah? i used to manifest from time to time but then would just give up again,since i was not seeing results and so on. so useful wow.and then thereā€™s the others things like mediocre grades, poor family health, just constant tiredness and fatigue feeling,
tw : mention of being depressed,sh,ed, : felt empty like life had absolutely no meaning, suicidal thoughts, tried to end by over-consumption of medication, self-harm and bulimia, constant complaining and NEGATIVE ONLY mindset.
but now, NOW i tell you ever single thing iā€™ve just listed changed completely like every single damn thing iā€™ve just listed is no more, itā€™s out of the date, dead, buried and no longer existing !
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it clicked
then at some point at my life i was just like. yk what? fuck i just wanna change it all. then i really like reallyĀ  got into it all over again and for good. no more 1 week i try then giving up cause i ainā€™t seeing no Ā«Ā resultsĀ Ā».
i watched hours and hours of ppl talking about loa (iā€™m not saying you should do this at all itā€™s just that i was very under-informed and wanted to know everything about loa)on youtube, shoutout to rita kaminski and hyler who really put me into it and informed me. then i started reading nevilleā€™s pdf books, and tumblr blogs, kinda overconsuming but i liked getting myself informed.
and then thatā€™s where everything started and that i got aware of all the power i actually hold. all the things i actually can do just cause of my mind. i wrote down all my wishes in present tense ,like every single aspect i wanted to change/have in my life. and i started fully living in the end like really got myself into and at first of course, wavering from time to time in the beginning. it was pretty easy for me since i was used to manifestation.but what i didnā€™t do before is persist no matter what and thatā€™s what was really tricky for me in the beginning to persist no matter what and not just give up to bullshit 3D. but when i kept moving forward no matter the 3D and made it facts the only my 4D matters and everything has already happened, ALL and every single wish down to the last one flowed into my life. ONE by ONE every single hour of the day i would get my manifestations down to the last letter i wrote in my notes.every single thing
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success storyy
in a matter of few weeks like really 3 week-ish like- 1 month max.
starting off LUCK iā€™m extremely lucky now every single time i play gambling activities i win. iā€™ve won insane amounts at scratch cards i think iā€™ve won in total more than 5ā€™000$. JUST FROM SCRATCH CARDS.and before i started i NEVER EVER WON. now whenever i play thereā€™s not one time that iā€™ll win absolutely nothing even just a small prize
won huge lottery prize (from 200 to 12k the biggest iā€™ve won yet)
winning a gambling games, either online or dice rolling luck,bets, bingos etc.. its literally insane every one keep telling that i literally has got godā€™s blessing (iā€™m the god guysšŸ„°)
financially freedom, my parents upgraded jobs and iā€™ve got lots of incomes + the money my parents give meĀ 
all the debts my dad had, he got rid of ALL of them and when i tell you mf had a lot of emā˜ ļø
move out in a new huge ass condo which is a duplex (like really like i wrote it itā€™s actually scary how powerful we are..) Iā€™VE FINALLY GOT MY OWN ROOM and weā€™re getting my desired furnitures and decorating the house iā€™m so grateful
friends and popularity i think biggest shock for me is really this. like my social life has gone from very paisible to completely fully booked and passioning life. like seriously iā€™ve been to more parties, concerts, birthdays, and hangouts during the last 2 weeks holidays than in my entire life
got lot of new friends, healthy relationships and quality time passed on lots of fun activities and sm memories
black groups friend. WITH AN S.so thankful to myself to be this good a manifestation i litteraly got into a black friend group of girls and iā€™ve never felt more at my place and understood this much. and these girls know the black group boys (when i tell you that 2y ago they were the person that i wanted to be close with so bad..also theyā€™re really hot and funny lol)so we hung out with them and i was literally so highlighted and became pretty much friends with all of them !!Ā 
my man. HELLO I LITERALLY MANIFESTED MY DREAM RELATIONSHIP? when i met him i didnā€™t actually realize right on the spot that he was exactly how i wanted him to be and reading back to when i scripted out all the things i wanted at the beginning, everything matched. heā€™s literally physically and mentally the man of my dream LIKE REALLY. weā€™re no bf and gf YET cause itā€™s just a little soon but we see each others super often and we have the best relationship ever i swear itā€™s giving wattpad. the flirting is crazyyy.
dream bod.from head to toe my desired body. heavy on the lower body all for that azz and wide hips.ive got smooth and clear skin and smell good all the time!! litteraly flawless face + got my braces which suits so much and dimples
plenty of vacations (went to ibiza, usa and dubai )
lenient parents they use to be so strict before i swear its crazy they let me go so easily now, i can hangout without asking 3 days ,like they accept even if i've gotta go in the next hour or if wanna go on trip that's in another country. i can come back home so much later too
attractive & magnetic aura + being really charismatic (everyone i met keep telling me iā€™ve got this thing that really makes them want me, get closer to me)
good grades without doing much
perfect self-concept - as i kept living 24/7 in the state of wish fulfilled, my self concept only got better making me really know what iā€™m worth and never wavering/ going back to the old story
whole ass pc set up
all of my desired skincare/makeups/shoes/clothes
and so much more...
outro
i hope y'all liked my blog and that it motivated some of you to NEVER GIVE UP cause y'all are reallyy some powerful mfs and y'all already got all of yours desires !!
Ėš ą¼˜ā™” ā‹†ļ½”Ėš honey kisses, shayama
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luvyeni Ā· 4 months ago
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SAY CHEESE ,, ė‚˜ģž¬ėƼ
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pairings ā€Žāøāøāø model!jaemin x fem!reader wc. 2.5k+
genre. smut
š“„· includes ... fingering, unprotected sex, corruption kink, praise kink
怌 authors note š–¹­ 怍 i needed a soft one , been doing cheating and yandere fics all week.
āŖ masterlist! ā«
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ā€œi don't know chaewon,ā€ you hear your roommate's footsteps padding behind you as you make your way into your bedroomā€” she was right on your hip as tried to close the door, pushing it open as you sat on your bed. ā€œthis is your assignment, and i don't feel comfortable doing it for you.ā€
your roommate whines sitting down on your bed as well. ā€œplease yn, i can't miss this internship it will be career changing, and you're the only person i know who can take photos as well as i do, maybe even better , and i know you wont try and fuck him cause you havent fucked anyone in your life.ā€ she said, you scoffed. ā€œwhy can't you text the guy and tell him you have another shoot?ā€ you asked. ā€œbecause this model is already hard to get and if i don't get this shoot im gonna fail my class.ā€ she explained. ā€œyou passed this class last semester so you understand how much of a hard ass this teacher is.ā€ she said.
ā€œplease yn,ā€ she begged, ā€œi will buy groceries for next month if you do this for me,ā€ you thought about it, it was a good deal. ā€œfine.ā€ your friend smiled, clapping in excitement. ā€œthank you, thank you so much.ā€ she said hugging you. ā€œokay, okay let me go.ā€ you pulled away. ā€œit's a two day shoot, he has his own hair and makeup team so all you have to do is show up and take pretty pictures of the pretty man.ā€ she said. ā€œwho is this mysterious model who is so hard to get?ā€
ā€œna jaemin.ā€ she said, you knew the name; he was new to the modeling scene, but he was quickly growing, establishing himself in the cut throat industry. ā€œhowā€™d you manage to get him, i thought he was like london for a fashion show?ā€ you asked. ā€œwhat business does he have with a mediocre college student photoshoot?ā€ your best friend scoffed. ā€œignoring the mediocre part, you know donghyuck?ā€ you nodded, he had a crush on your roommate and was very open about it. ā€œwell he apparently knows jaemin, and he set this up for me , in exchange for a date.ā€ you nodded. ā€œusing your assets, good for you.ā€
ā€œyeah, and i didn't know this would be the only days he'd be free, and i didn't catch it until i checked my schedule.ā€ she said standing up. ā€œi'll text him and let him know, thank you so much.ā€ you nodded. ā€œWhatever, don't complain next month when it's time to shop for food.ā€ she smiled sheepishly. ā€œi won't promise.ā€ she said. ā€œnow get out, i have to work on this essay that's due in like 4 hours.ā€
the next day was the day of the shoot, luckily you didn't have class so it wasn't a big inconvenienceā€” the night before you made sure all your cameras were charged and working properly, thankfully they were and you were ready to go. ā€œhere's the address, you might want to get there earlier than he does so you can be ready , he's pretty busy and we don't know how long he has on his schedule.ā€ your friend came back into your room , to which you agreed.
you got to the destination of the shoot a few hours before the shoot, cleaning up the place a bit; setting up the background and decorations. you brought a few snacks and drinks for him and his staff, also setting those out for the taking. you sent your roommate a quick message wishing her good luck with her internship, the door to the place opening. ā€œhello?ā€
you looked up from your phone; he came in smiling, his team following behind him , he had this aura to him, he definitely was a model, he was attractiveā€” very attractive, it made you kind of speechless. ā€œh-hi.ā€ you said, letting them come in. ā€œyou guys can set up over there.ā€
you finished up your texting, deciding to make yourself known for real. ā€œhi im yn.ā€ you watched him lift his eyebrow in confusion. ā€œyn?ā€ he asked. ā€œwhat happened to chaewon? hyuck told me this was for her class.ā€ chaewon didn't text himā€” you were gonna kill her. ā€œit is, she had a internship today and she couldn't miss it, she also couldn't miss this shoot because then she'd fail this class and she didn't want to do that so she sent me.ā€ jaemin watched you nervously fiddle with your finger as you explained yourself, smiling to himself. ā€œis that okay? i can show you some of my work if it makes you comfortable.ā€
ā€œno baby doll don't worry,ā€ his words made you freeze up. ā€œhyuck said chaewon was nice girl, so im sure she surrounds herself with other nice girls.ā€ his eyes scanned up your body, making your cheeks heat up as he made eye contact with yours. ā€œyou seem like a nice girl.ā€ you nodded, still flustered. ā€œo-okay, i'm gonna go finish setting up, you guys can finish getting him ready, i brought snacks in case any of you get hungry they're over there so.ā€ you quickly ran over to your camera. ā€œshe's cute.ā€ his stylist said. ā€œso adorable.ā€ his makeup artist said, he smiled, pulling out his phone.
jaemin. your girl didn't show up, her roommate did.
hyuck. ik she text me , and told me, yn is a good girl though, she's also a photographer.
jaemin. single?
hyuck. definitely, she doesn't even come out much. why you like?
jaemin. very much.
hyuck. go for it then šŸ˜‰
he watched you adjust the camera, muttering something to yourself, his stylist handed him his outfit to get changed into, he took the clothes into his hand, making his way over to you. he stood behind you, waiting for you to take notice of him. ā€œwe can get started whenā€”ā€ you turned around to where the boy was already standing there, extremely close, close enough where you could smell his cologne. ā€œI have to change into my clothes.ā€ he said. ā€œchaewon gave me a dress code.ā€ you nodded. ā€œof course she did.ā€ you looked around the studio. ā€œthere's no bathrooms in here , and i don't have the key to the one outside.ā€
ā€œdon't stress baby doll,ā€ there was that nickname again, ā€œiā€™ve had to change in public before, nothing knew.ā€ he walked away leaving you confused, until you seen his arms lifting up and off his shirt went; your hands coming up to cover your eyes. ā€œyou-you're gonna get dressed here.ā€ he laughed at you. ā€œit's not like there's anywhere else,ā€ he said, tilting his head to the side. ā€œyou act like you've never seen a naked man before.ā€ you hadn't , but he didn't know that. ā€œju-just quickly get changed.ā€ you fanned your heated face , he smiled.
jaemin knew you probably hadn't, he just wanted to see your reaction and he was thoroughly amused at what he was seeing. ā€œget dressed and leave the poor girl alone.ā€ his stylist said, slapping the back of his head. he finished changing his clothes, just as you were turning around. ā€œgreat we can finally get started.ā€
the shoot went good, you took a bunch; a few you knew chaewon would like and a few you liked, you probably took over 100 photos of the boy; not that you were complaining, you got to stare at this gorgeous man and not look like a weirdo. ā€œhow do they look?ā€ jaemin asked. ā€œwould you like to see?ā€ he nodded, coming behind the camera; you showed him your laptop screen. ā€œsee?ā€
ā€œyou're really talented?ā€ he watched you try and hide a smile at his praise. ā€œyou can smile baby doll, it was a compliment,ā€ he said. ā€œth-thank you.ā€ you said with your head down. ā€œwhich ones do you like?ā€ he asked. ā€œhuh?ā€ you said confused. ā€œoh-oh well this is chaewons project so i just did what I know she likes.ā€ he hummed, ā€œyeah i know it's chaewons, but if it was your project, what would you choose?ā€ you didn't realize how close he was until you could feel his breathing on your neck.
ā€œum.ā€ you clicked through the photos. ā€œth-these three.ā€ you pointed out. ā€œoh someone likes my upper body i see?ā€ he laughed as you turned around wide eyed, stuttering out an explanation. ā€œdon't worry i don't mind it all, i got into this business to be stared at and admired by pretty and sweet girls like you.ā€ he said. ā€œtell chaewon she should use these, her roommate has good taste.ā€
the rest of the shoot went by in a blur, soon you were cleaning up and jaemin was changing back into his comfortable clothes. ā€œwe'll go get the car ready.ā€ he nodded, his small staff leaving the studio, leaving you and him alone; just what he wanted, he watched you talk on the phone. ā€œi should be home soon, don't worry, yeah , no i'm not saying it, fine i love you too, bye.ā€ you hung up. ā€œboyfriend?ā€ he asked, knowing the answer already. ā€œoh no, that was chaewon.ā€ you chuckled.
ā€œso a pretty little thing like you don't have a boyfriend?ā€ you shyly nodded, ā€œlike ever?ā€ you were embarrassed. ā€œno it's okay baby doll i'm just a bit shocked.ā€ he said. ā€œit's you're so pretty, I never would have imagined you were single.ā€ he said , coming closer making you nervously turn around , but you could still get hear him getting closer until he was caging you against the table. ā€œja-jaemin.ā€
ā€œcome on pretty, let me make you feel good.ā€ he pressed up against you. ā€œturn around for me.ā€ he whispered in your ear, smiling when obediently did. ā€œgood girl, you listen well.ā€ you eyes were wide. ā€œyour staff.ā€ he smirked. ā€œtrust, they know, don't worry about that.ā€ his hand came up to your thigh, making its way up your skirt. ā€œi-iā€™ve never done this before.ā€ you felt his hand close to your clothed cunt. ā€œi know pretty just relax.ā€ you felt his hand on your mound, making you close your legs around his arms. ā€œno.ā€ he smiled. ā€œyou gotta keep them open if you want me to make you feel good.ā€
you slowly opened your legs allowing him to move again. ā€œgood girl.ā€ he thumbed on your clit, you let out a whimper, biting your lip to cover it up. ā€œlet me hear all those pretty noises.ā€ he pulled your panties to the side. ā€œi'm gonna put a finger inside you, okay?ā€ you nodded, his slowly ran his finger up your slit, before pushing his finger in. ā€œja-jaemin.ā€ you moaned. ā€œfeel good?ā€ he moved his finger in and out. ā€œyou're so wet, this pretty pussy never been played with, you're dripping all over my hand.ā€
you were a mess, your face was so fucked out from one finger it made him hard as a rock. ā€œmā€™gonna add another one okay?ā€ you nodded, he lifted your leg higher holding it as he added another finger. ā€œgood girl , taking two of my fingers.ā€ he praised, you really like that, your cunt tightening around his digits. ā€œyou liked that? me praising you?ā€ you nodded. ā€œanswer me baby doll , you like when i praise you?ā€
ā€œy-yes i do.ā€ you felt a sensation bubbling in your stomach. ā€œja-jaemin i feel.ā€ you couldn't stop it from coming, your legs closing around his hand once again, as your orgasm washed over you.
jaemins eyes lit up light a child's on christmas morning as he watched you orgasm, your juices covering his finger. ā€œthere you go, cumming all over my hand.ā€ he cursed, feeling his cock begging to be freed from his sweats. ā€œgood girl, let it all for me, fuck im so hard right nowā€ he groaned, pressing his lip to the side of your head. ā€œyou want me to fuck you? stretch your little pussy out?ā€
you moaned, nodding. ā€œpl-please.ā€ you weren't really waiting for ā€œthe perfect guyā€ but right about now, you were really worked up and the way you could feel jaemins grinding his clothed cock against youā€” he was the perfect guy.
he lifted you on to the counter. ā€œsh-shit.ā€ he pulled his pants down enough to pull his cock out, hissing, the air hitting his leaky tip. ā€œso fucking hard for you doll, ready for me?ā€ you bit your lip as he lined his cock up to your entrance. ā€œfuck.ā€ he groaned as he slowly worked himself inside you. ā€œjaemin.ā€ you moaned, he held your hips down. ā€œfuck don't move baby, let me do it.ā€ he fully seethed himself inside you. ā€œfuck, you're so tight.ā€
he slowly moved; your cunt barely letting him out, he was in heavenā€” and so were you, hold his bicep , your head thrown back as he fucked you, you never felt this sensation before, but you loved it. ā€œplease, faster.ā€ you moaned , he smirked, speeding up. ā€œyou want more?ā€ he groaned, his hips now slapping against yours with much force. ā€œfuck baby doll i'll give you more.ā€
you could feel the counter below you shaking as he fucked into you vigorously. ā€œthat's it, take nana fat cock inside you.ā€ he groaned, slowly losing himself. ā€œfuck you're little pussy is so good.ā€ he cursed. ā€œfuck i'm gonna cum.ā€ he moaned. ā€œyou going cum for me?ā€ he toyed with your clit. ā€œbe a good girl and cum for me.ā€
and with his words and him fucking into you deeply, kissing your cervix you soon cumming hard, your eyes rolling to the back of your head as your cunt tightened around him, his cursed as he came inside you. ā€œoh fuck yn.ā€ he sighed, his head dropping as he came, you could feel him every inch of him twitching inside you you as he covered your inside in white. ā€œoh fuck.ā€
he slowly pulled out, smirking as you whimpered. ā€œso sensitive baby.ā€ he said, his cum leaking from your hole. ā€œthat felt good baby.ā€ he kissed your neck. ā€œso good if my staff weren't waiting for me, i would stuff my cock back into your pretty pussy.ā€ smiling as you whined. ā€œthere's always tomorrow.ā€ he said, pulling away, finally letting you get dressed.
ā€œwill you be back tomorrow?ā€ he asked. ā€œyeah, chaewon has another day at her internship.ā€ he helped you pack up all your cameras. ā€œgood.ā€ he handed you the bag. ā€œiā€™ll come without my staff,ā€ you yelped as he pulled you close. ā€œwhy?ā€
ā€œbecause after you take all the pictures you need , i don't need any distractions when i teach you to take my cock in that pretty mouth.ā€
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Ā©LUVYENI
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misctf Ā· 2 months ago
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I had a dream once I found a pair of cleats and tried them on, and transformed into a big, dumb, horny football jock, then came load after load of cum , all sweaty and drooling as my new team arrived. How I wish I could experience that, do you know a way?
Huh, a dream you say? And just once? Part of me doubts that. And I can tell by how youā€™re blushing that youā€™ve likely had this dream a few times. And each time, youā€™ve woken up with your boxers soaked with jizz. Okay, okay... maybe I didnā€™t need to call you out like that. Anyway.... A big, dumb, horny football jock. Look, Iā€™m not here to judge, but are you... of course you are.... Sigh.... Well, Iā€™ll stop wasting our time. Risks yada yada, things going wrong yada yada... You get the point. Now follow me...
You follow close behind as I lead us through a few pairs of double doors. I have to unlock a few more doors and suddenly, we find ourselves within a large warehouse. There are thousands of articles of clothing. Underwear, socks, athletic shirts... you look around in awe.
Yes, I know, very impressive. We have a lot of magical items that weā€™ve collected over the years. Let me just grab a pair of gloves... Some of these items are quite potent actually. Like just a touch and bam! Stupid jock! Okay, maybe not that dramatic, but... And here we go! A pair of red football cleats... Just like in your dream? Well, what can I say, Iā€™m a miracle worker. Okay, Iā€™ll put them down right here. Look at that, theyā€™re brand new too, they even have the paper still stuffed in them... Just give me one second, I have to grab a special tool. I can tell this pair is quite potent.... Wait... Donā€™t try to remove the paper with your... Fuck.... Didnā€™t I say... Hey! Donā€™t get too close!
The cleats are stuck around your hands. Youā€™re shaking your hands, looking up at me desperately. No matter how much you flail, they seem locked in place. Youā€™re breathing heavily. A sense of panic filling you. Something feels very wrong. You feel warmer and youā€™re sweating profusely.
This is very bad... Okay, give me a second to just... what do you mean your hands hurt? Oh fuck... Ok not good, not good... I need to...
You cry out as you feel your hands start to shift and change within the cleats. It feels like your hands are lengthening, while your fingers are painful shortened. But itā€™s not just your feet. You watch as your forearms start to shift and change. Packing on muscle that more resembles thick calves rather than forearms.
Oh yeah, these cleats are quite potent. Okay... uh, I would be lying if I said Iā€™ve dealt with this before. This is something we in the business call a... okay yeah, maybe Iā€™ll spare you the details. But... Oh careful now!
Your legs suddenly give way and youā€™ve fallen onto youā€™re abdomen. You let out another cry as your arms start to shift and change even more. Theyā€™re forced above your head and you yelp as thick muscle starts to fill in. Your once mediocre arms are now a set of two built legs, crushing your head in between new thighs. But the pain in your new legs pales in comparison to the feelings from your dick. Itā€™s throbbing in a mixture of pain, then pleasure. You feel nauseous as the room is filled with the sounds of your body cracking and shifting. Yet you moan as your body continues its metamorphosis.
Oh fascinating... Iā€™ve never seen this before... So the pecs become the abs, and the abs become the pecs. Fuck, they're getting huge too... What am I talking about? Itā€™s uh... oh! Give me a second! Well, hello there... Huh, still barely a whisper... Who am I talking to? Well, uh... itā€™s complicated. But...
You yelp when you suddenly feel your body push itself up. Youā€™re forced to look down at the floor, and it feels like youā€™re doing a handstand. You clearly see the red cleats, Ā and the firm calf and thigh muscles that used to be your arms. You try to crane your neck to look up, but are unable to.
Well fuck... this is, uh... What did you say? I canā€™t... your voice is a bit garbled now... Something salty? Yeah... I think that might be semen... Really? Come on, isnā€™t is obvious? Are you getting the idea now? Oh, donā€™t look at me like that, there were risks...
You yelp as a firm hand suddenly wraps around your neck. Youā€™re afraid you wonā€™t be able to breath, but instead, you just feel the salty liquid leave your lips. And as the hand moves up and down, more of it dribbles from your mouth. You try to speak, but you find your mouth has been forced to remain in a small ā€œOā€ shape, no matter how desperately you try to move it. Worse yet, you watch as your hair falls from your head, decorating the floor beneath you.
Yeah, I doubt heā€™s gonna be able to talk much at this stage... So what did you say your name was....? Brett? Makes sense, you definitely look like a Brett. I gotta say, watching your arms grow in was quite the sight. And the muscle here... your biceps are so firm... oh sorry... right Iā€™ll let you finish...
The deep moans that fill the air are not your own. Youā€™ve never heard moans like this before. But soon your vision and hearing dwindle significantly. Instead, all you can feel is the rough calloused hand that jerks your hardened body, as well as the stream of cum thatā€™s leaving your new mouth. And as the pressure builds and builds, so does the pleasure. Itā€™s numbing. Numbing to the point you feel your complex thinking dwindle. All you can focus on is pleasure. Anyway, anyhow. And then you feel it. Cum bursts from your new mouth, and Brett lets out a loud moan, falling back against the wall. You feel your body softening, your mind only able to focus on your need for more.
Okay... I guess Iā€™ll be cleaning that up... Oh? Whatā€™s happening? The room is spinning and... Wait, where are we...? The locker room? Damn, those cleats were potent... Oh sorry, you gotta get ready for your game. And I can hear your teammates coming in... Wait... Youā€™re already getting hard again? And youā€™re already leaking? Shit... Well, I guess this isnā€™t what we expected. But, youā€™re certainly a horny, dumb football jock. And youā€™re certainly drooling there quite a bit, just in time for your team to see.... Well I guess I should go....Huh? Wait for you...? After the game...? In the locker room...? Sigh.... you stupid jock types are my weakness... see you soon...
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thisapplepielife Ā· 4 months ago
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Written for a @astrangersummer.
Tip Your Driver
Week #15 Prompt: Modern AU | Word Count: 4115 | Rating: T | POV: Steve | Characters: Steve, Eddie, Wayne, Robin | Relationships: Steddie, Platonic Stobin | CW: Language, Non-Explicit Mentions of Sex | Tags: Modern Setting AU, Delivery Driver Steve, Rock Star Eddie, Meet Cute, Good Uncle Wayne Munson
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Of all the shitty service jobs Steve's had, this one is definitely among the worst.
And he's been stuck working some pretty shitty jobs over the years, both before and after they moved out here. If he hadn't hated the one at the shoe store so much, because ew feet, he wouldn't be doing this in the first place. At least that was in one location, a steady paycheck, and not that far from their apartment. But, he didn't know that feet draw in some weirdos, so here he is, lugging other people's shit around, because he needs the money.
He just sighs as he pulls up in front of the address on the app. He double checks the posted numbers over the garage, and it seems to be the right place. Everything matches enough for him to call it good.
The house is really nice.
It's not in The Hills or anything, so he hadn't expected something so nice.
Now, Steve doesn't mind delivering groceries, not really, but this guy, Eddie it says, ordered a bunch of heavy shit, and the tip was only the mediocre bare minimum. Which, he wasn't that mad about, until right now, after he's seen the house this guy lives in.Ā 
No, now he's pretty annoyed.
Whatever. Par for the fucking course from Fancy Pants Rich McGee over here. How the hell you spell chauffeur? Chauffeur. Indeed. Maybe he should make tiktoks about situations just like this. Robin keeps hounding him, saying if he'd just do it, that he could rake in a little extra cash.Ā 
He's skeptical.Ā 
Steve looks back at the house.Ā 
Oh well. He left his money behind for a reason, the only thing he kept was his car because his parents were dumb enough to put it in his name. And honestly? It does him no good to be jealous or whatever the fuck he's feeling right now.
At least this guy had been responsive, and pretty nice, when answering Steve's messages about substitutions and out of stock items. Not everybody is, unfortunately, acting as if Steve is the one stocking the store himself.
Steve opens the back hatch of his car, and leans in to grab the first items to be left at the door, as requested. If they don't see you, they feel less bad about the shitty tip, Steve's learned.
But it's fine. Steve doesn't want to deal with anyone face-to-face today, anyway. Because he needs to hurry. He and Robin are already a couple days late on rent, and he's gotta try to make up the difference today. If not, they're gonna be fucking screwed. Why is this city so goddamn expensive to live in? It's bullshit.
"Let me help," comes the voice right next to him, and Steve jumps, hitting his head on the open hatch door.
Now, he's skipped over annoyed and has been vaulted straight into pissed off.Ā 
Partly at himself for being so far in his own head that he didn't even hear this guy approaching, but mainly at this asshole for even being in his personal space in the first place. He needs to take about three big steps back.
"Oh, fuck! Sorry! I didn't mean to startle you!" the guy shouts, and Steve hasn't even seen this asshole yet, but he knows he hates him.Ā 
"Most people don't help unload the car," Steve snaps, turning to look at him, and the guy is looking back at him with big, big brown eyes. Robin would call them doe eyes, without a doubt. Well, fuck. Fine. Steve softens his tone, "It's okay. I just wasn't expecting you."
"Sorry," Eddie says again, still too close. "I'm Eddie. I ordered the groceries. Can I help? Please?"
Steve nods, and lets him reach in and grab his own case of water, while Steve picks up a few of the sacks. It's the least the guy can do, now that he's given him a headache. Literally.
Steve carries the sacks towards the porch, and leans over to put them down.
"Just come on in," Eddie says, and the door swings open, banging against the rubber doorstop on the wall.
"Don't bang the door!" comes the yell from the other room, and Steve peers into the house and sees an older guy sitting in a lift chair, with a walker in front of him.
"It's my door, old man, I'll bang it if I want to!" Eddie yells back, but there's no heat there. Steve can hear the teasing affection in his voice, and Steve can't help but smile.
"Don't come crying to me when there's a hole in your wall. Can you patch drywall? Because I can't right now," the guy, probably Eddie's dad the way they're bickering, snaps.
Eddie ignores the question from his dad.
"C'mon, this way," Eddie says, looking over his shoulder at Steve, as Steve lingers on the step.Ā 
Well, no. That's not. You don't go in stranger's houses. It's, like, rule one. And just good common sense. Which apparently Steve has none of, because he does follow Eddie into the house.Ā 
Robin will kill him, if this Eddie dude doesn't kill him first.Ā 
Steve puts the bags down on the counter, and heads back out to make another trip, Eddie following, "That's my uncle. He's just crotchety that he had to have his broken hip replaced, and now he's dependent on me for the near future."
Steve laughs, "Well, maybe don't bang the door and he won't be crotchety."
"You heard me. It's my door," Eddie says, smiling wide. He's pretty, very pretty. Long, dark hair tied up on top of his head, and heavy tattoos all along his arms, creeping up onto his neck.
He's honestly gorgeous.Ā 
Steve wonders if he's famous. He doesn't look familiar, but he looks like he could be famous. And his house is pretty fucking nice. This is L.A. Everybody is somehow famous in L.A. Except for Steve and Robin. They are definitely not famous.
Unless he's a tech bro? But he doesn't really look the type.
Either way, famous or not, Steve smiles back, can't not, not when he looks like that, then asks, teasing him, "Well do you know how to patch drywall?"Ā 
"Fuck no. But I could hire someone to fix it if the door knob somehow gets through the stopper."
"Well, at least you have a plan," Steve says, and Eddie laughs.
"He just hates the city. Hates my house. Hates everything. Except me. He loves me," Eddie says, as he grabs a case of Gatorade in one hand and the case of pork and beans in the other.
That's a lot of beans.Ā 
"That's a lot of beans," Steve says aloud, even if he doesn't mean to, even if he knows better than to comment on other people's groceries.Ā 
But Eddie laughs. "Tell me about it. Man likes what he likes, though. There's no changing him now."Ā 
Steve nods, grabbing another handful himself. It's nice that Eddie is taking care of his uncle.
"I'm not usually home much, hence all the groceries being ordered at once. Sorry about that. The cabinets were pretty bare, and I just didn't want to leave him home alone. He's still a fall risk, even if he keeps insisting he's not."
"That's okay, I understand. Big orders are more common than you'd think," Steve says, stepping back into the house that he's probably not going to get murdered in, thankfully.
Big orders are common, he's not lying about that, and more often than not, the tips offered for shopping hundreds of items, are less than you'd think. So, this order wasn't even out of the ordinary. Not really. That's why Steve took it. Some pay was better than none, especially today, that's for sure.
"Still. I'm grateful. You saved my ass today, man," Eddie answers.Ā 
"Well, it's my job," Steve says, and Eddie laughs.
They finish bringing everything in, and Steve nods at Eddie, "Okay. I think that does it."
"Here," Eddie says, and plucks an envelope off the counter, "I always worry that your tips in the app will get eaten up by the corporate assholes taking their cut off the top. So. Cash is king."
Steve takes the envelope. A tip he doesn't have to report? Why thank you, Eddie.Ā 
"Thank you. You didn't have to do this, or help bring it in, you know? But I appreciate both."
Eddie smiles, "Thank you for getting all that shit for us. We both appreciate it. Don't we Wayne?"
Wayne grumbles, but Steve's pretty sure he doesn't appreciate anything right now. He knows he wouldn't either, if he had broken his hip.
They say their goodbyes, and that's that. Steve will never see Eddie with the pretty eyes ever again.
At the next red light, Steve opens the envelope, expecting an extra ten or twenty bucks, maybe, but is shocked to see that there are three, insanely crisp one hundred dollar bills inside.Ā 
Holy shit.Ā 
That's way more than he usually makes in a single day. Two days, even. Just by delivering one order that he didn't think was gonna pay well at all.
And he got to look at a hot dude for a minute or two.Ā 
It's enough to cover what they were short on the rent, even. It might not have felt like a lot of money to Eddie, if he handed it over so readily, but it feels life-changing to Steve, right now. He remembers when three hundred bucks wasn't anything to him either, back when he had access to all his parents' money and all their unhappiness.
Now, it's different.Ā 
Robin's gonna shit.
Hot damn.
Thank you, Eddie.
"Booyah," Steve says, slapping the envelope on the counter.Ā 
Robin picks it up, and thumbs through it. It has Eddie's tip, and the few extra bucks he picked up during the rest of the day.Ā 
"Oh my god, no way! Where did you get this much cash, dingus? Are you turning tricks on the side now?" Robin asks, and Steve laughs.Ā 
"Yes. I thought I'd see what I could get for this ass," Steve says, turning and pushing his ass outwards in her direction.Ā 
She doesn't even look, but says, "Honestly, you might be worth more than this, as much as I hate to admit it," she comments dryly, and he smiles.Ā 
"No, some rich dude that ordered a bunch of heavy shit gave me a big tip," Steve explains.
"That's what she said," Robin teases, and her eyes are still wide as she looks at the bills in her hand, "Seriously, though. Thank you, rich, old dude," Robin says.Ā 
"Rich, but not old. I think he might have been famous in some way. YouTuber? Musician? I don't know. Nice house."Ā 
"Well. Describe him. Let's Google him," Robin says, wiggling her fingers in the air like she's stretching before this big task she's about to undertake.
Steve isn't sure searching for him is gonna work, but he lets her try, "Eddie. Probably a little older than us. Lots of tattoos."Ā 
"Was it Eddie Vedder? Please tell me you know who Eddie Vedder is, dingus?"Ā 
He knows who Eddie Vedder is, Jesus.Ā 
He gives her a look, "Not that old. And he was heavily tattooed. Is Eddie Vedder tattooed? Plus, this guy had dark eyes. Really dark. And no flannel."Ā 
She keeps looking on her phone, showing him options, "Him?"Ā 
No.Ā 
"Him?"Ā 
No.Ā 
"Him?"Ā 
"No. Not him." None of them are. Nobody she shows him is the same guy. So, he thinks of all the famous Eddies he knows of.Ā 
"Was it Eddie Van Halen?" Steve asks.Ā 
"Since he's dead, probably not," Robin says.Ā 
"Oh," Steve says. He didn't remember that. And he'd be too old, anyway. "We're looking for someone that looks kinda like young Eddie Van Halen. But with tattoos."
"You're obsessed with the tattoos. Was it Ed Sheeran? He has lots of tattoos," Robin asks, and he rolls his eyes.Ā 
"Robin. I think I know what Ed Sheeran looks like. This man was not ginger. Dark hair, dark eyes. And he was American. Maybe this guy is just rich? Not famous at all. It doesn't matter. I'll never see him again, anyway. We'll just thank him from afar for saving our asses today."Ā 
Robin sighs heavily, and puts her phone down, "If you'd got yourself a rich boyfriend we'd have it made all the time."Ā 
"Well, I'll work on that," he says sarcastically.Ā 
At least for now, they can pay another month's rent. That's a big win. Huge.
Maybe they can keep their heads above water, now.
And they do, by some sort of miracle. It was only three hundred bucks, but that was enough of a windfall to get them back in the black. And somehow they've stayed ahead since, for nearly two whole months. They haven't been this stable financially since they arrived in town.
Today, Steve flips through the different apps he drives for, trying to decide what order to take, when he sees a huge pizza order. The order is absurdly big, but the tip is decent, and picking up a stack of pizzas is infinitely easier than shopping a whole-ass grocery list. Steve's just seriously questioning if it'll all fit in his car.
He's gonna risk it.
Luckily, it does, but there are pizza boxes piled high in every seat and the rear. He definitely doesn't have hot bags for all of them. Hopefully he doesn't get caught in traffic.
The area seems familiar, but when Steve pulls up in front of the house, he knows why. Eddie. Only, the last time it was groceries, not food, that he delivered here.Ā 
There are vehicles everywhere. Clearly some sort of party, Steve thinks, to require this amount of pizza. And as soon as Steve steps out of the car, Eddie is out of the house, being trailed by three other, mostly leather-clad, guys. It'd look threatening, if Eddie wasn't smiling so big.
"Steve! When I saw Steve was my driver, I was like, maybe? But Steve's a common name, and there was no picture, so I didn't get my hopes up, but hey! It is you!" Eddie shouts, moving to the back of the car, "Watch your head this time, sweetheart," Eddie adds, and Steve is sure he's blushing.Ā 
He just stands there kind of dumbly, watching as Eddie commandeers his order right out of Steve's vehicle. Eddie's definitely unusual.Ā 
Eddie hands stack after stack of pizzas to the waiting guys, making them carry the bulk of it. And Steve watches as they ferry them off towards the house, Steve not having to even lift a finger this time.Ā 
Now, it's just him and Eddie standing on the curb.Ā 
Eddie holds out an envelope, and Steve looks at it.
"Man, thank you, but you tipped so well last time, you really don't have to again."
"I want to. You provide a service, I want to pay for that service," Eddie says, shaking the envelope, and Steve reluctantly takes it. Whatever is inside, will really help him and Robin stay ahead. It did last time. He's not really in a position to say no, even as well as they are doing at the moment.
"Thank you, truly," Steve says, tucking it into his pocket, "How's your Uncle Wayne's hip?"
Eddie smiles, so fucking wide, "You remembered! He's good. Great. Headed home soon, which I'm certain he's thrilled about. He's definitely never coming here again. I'll have to go home when I want to see him."
Steve laughs, "Glad to hear he's better, if annoyed."
"Do you want to stay?" Eddie asks, "We're having a little going away party for him. The more the merrier. Or, is your shift not over? You could come back?"
Steve doesn't have a shift, he can clock in and out to take orders as he pleases, and right now he'd really like to accept Eddie's offer. Even if it's probably just Eddie being polite. A pity ask, if you will.
"You don't have to invite your delivery driver into your house, you know? I could be a murderer."
"Unlikely," Eddie says, "and I'm not inviting my delivery driver. I'm inviting you, Steve."
Steve thinks over the options, and then nods. He can go in for a bit. If he's uncomfortable, he can get right back on the clock, no harm, no foul.
"Okay, let me park," Steve says, and he does just that. Putting the envelope of cash into the glove box without opening it. He doesn't want Eddie to see him scrounging through it. That feels tacky.
The pizza boxes are already open on every available flat surface in the kitchen and living room, and Eddie shoves a paper plate into Steve's hands, "Eat. Drink. Be merry."
Steve nods, and grabs a slice from the nearest box. He's not picky.
The house is full of people, and a lot of them seem vaguely famous. Like this is an industry thing, instead of a going away party for an old man with a newly not-broken hip.
Steve's worked enough of these events. They tried the catering thing for a while, and it was fine, for Steve anyway. Robin was just a little too clumsy to carry trays of dainty hors d'oeuvres around rooms filled with beautiful women in expensive dresses.
This isn't any of that though. This is cases of beer being chilled in kiddie pools, and dozens of pizzas. Fancy house, but not a fancy party. Steve spots Eddie's uncle sitting by himself on a couch, a beer resting on his knee and a paper plate of pizza on the arm rest.
Nobody else is sitting by him, so Steve goes over, "Can I sit?"
Wayne grumbles something that could be yes, could be no, Steve's not wholly sure, but he chooses to go ahead and sit down beside him.
"How's your hip?" Steve asks.
"Who are you?" Wayne asks, looking at him, suspicious.
"Steve. Uh, a delivery driver? I've brought a couple orders to you guys now. And Eddie invited me to stay."
Wayne nods, and goes back to his plate, "Hip's fine. Ready to go home."
"Where's home?" Steve asks, and he's not sure why. Clearly this man has no interest in making small talk with him.
"Indiana," Wayne says.Ā 
"Hey! For me, too. Small world."
"What're you doing in California, then?" Wayne asks. "Trying to get into show biz?"
"No. No way," Steve laughs, "Not for me. Uh, my best friend? Robin? She wanted to move out here. Wanted an adventure. And I wanted her to be happy. So. Here we are."
Wayne nods.
"Did you break your hip in Indiana and Eddie dragged you all the way out here?" Steve asks.
"No," Wayne answers, "I came to visit him and broke my hip before I got out of the airport. This is why I don't take vacations."
Steve smiles, "That's bad luck. Sorry."
Wayne nods his head, and Steve assumes that's the end of this conversation, and they sit in silence for a few moments.
"You're Steve? The one that brought the groceries a few weeks ago?" Wayne asks.
"That's me," Steve confirms.
"He's been talking about you non-stop. I was like, just order more groceries. So, he tried. It was never you. Now we have more food than he'll ever eat. Probably need to take it to the food pantry."
Steve grins, looking down at his plate. He isn't sure what Eddie would want to see him for. They definitely aren't on the same level.
Eddie is across the room, talking wildly with his hands.
"He's a good kid," Wayne says, quietly, "All this? Not him. Not all of him, anyway."
Steve looks back at Wayne, "What do you mean?"
"All this fancy shit. I'm proud of him that their music has done so well. But he's a good kid. And he just wants to be happy."
"Don't we all," Steve says.
"People take advantage. If you're here for the money, for the fame. Just. Move on. Eddie would give it to you. But he wants something more. Needs it, I think."
Steve thinks he could be something more. But he doesn't really have anything to offer Eddie in return, and maybe heeding Wayne's warning wouldn't be such a bad idea. What business does he have getting involved with a famous musician? None.Ā 
"Got it," Steve says. "Well, I'm glad your hip healed."
Wayne grumbles at that, and it makes Steve smile.
Steve puts his trash in the can, and looks around. The hallways are lined with platinum records, news articles, and he leans close to read the name. Eddie Munson. Corroded Coffin. He's never heard of them. He'll have to look them up on Spotify.Ā 
He doesn't belong here.Ā 
He takes one last look at Eddie.Ā 
Eddie Munson of Corroded Coffin.
He tries to memorize his name, his band, so he can tell Robin later, solving their little mystery.
And then he ducks out of the front door, walking down the long driveway towards his car.Ā 
"Hey, Steve! Wait!" Eddie yells from behind him, and Steve slows.Ā 
"Hey, man. Thanks for having me," Steve says, turning to look at him.
"You're leaving already?"
Steve nods, "Work, you know."
Eddie nods, "Okay. Well. Come back. Anytime."
"Thanks, Eddie," Steve says, because he's pretty sure Eddie means that, "Enjoy your party. I'm glad Wayne's hip is good as new."
Steve turns to keep walking.
"Steve. Uh," Eddie says, and Steve considers pretending he didn't hear him. It'd be easy. The music is loud, probably pissing off the neighbors, but Eddie keeps talking. "Listen. I like you. Yeah, I know. I barely know you. But. We got good vibes, man. Can you not feel that?" Eddie asks, and when Steve turns to look back at him, he sees that Eddie's hands are shoved deep into his pockets.Ā 
He looks nervous.
He's famous, clearly rich, and beautiful. He could have anyone he wants. But he looks nervous talking to Steve. Who delivered the pizza. Make it make sense. Goddamn.Ā 
"Eddie," Steve says.
"Do you not feel it? If you don't, I'll leave you alone. I swear. But if you doā€¦"
Steve nods, "I do. But I'm a delivery driver. I live in a tiny apartment that I share with my best friend. We barely make ends meet. You could have anyone. Why would you want me?"
"Because I like you," Eddie says, "and I want to get to know you. I didn't grow up with anything either. I'm not old money. I'm new money. Brand new. So. I'm not that out of touch yet."
Steve smiles. He's old money, he just doesn't have access to it anymore. Eddie's new money, and doesn't know how to handle it. They'd be quite the pair.
Eddie keeps talking, trying to wheedle a date out of him, "Just. Let me take you out. Just us. Let's see if there's anything here," he says, motioning his hand between the two of them.
Steve wants to, he really does.Ā 
"Okay," Steve finally says, "nothing fancy. A normal date."
"We can definitely do that," Eddie says, and reaches into his pocket, pulling out his phone. "Let me give you my number."
Steve rattles off his number, Eddie texts him, and it buzzes against Steve's thigh. Already coming through, showing he's serious.
"Dinner? Movie? Bar? You name it," Eddie offers, eyes never leaving Steve's.
"Dinner's good. Nowhere fancy, though," Steve warns.Ā 
"Do I look like I like fancy places?" Eddie asks, looking down at his own clothes.
And Steve's eyes cut back to the gorgeous house.
Eddie laughs, "Fair enough. But I don't."
"Can you go out in public? Or are you too famous?" Steve asks. "I'm not familiar with your band, sorry."
Eddie laughs, "I think I like that you aren't, sweetheart. That means that maybe you like me, just for me. And I can go out. Nobody cares about me all that much."
Steve nods. Alright. They can go on one date, and see how it goes.Ā 
Well. That's how it goes.
Very, very well.
So well, that Steve's now satisfied and loose in Eddie's bed, when Eddie laughs, rolling into Steve's shoulder, face pressed to his skin. Lips kissing his shoulder, biting at him gently. Playing with him.
"What?" Steve asks, smiling as Eddie slides his hand into his, squeezing. "What's so funny."
"I tipped my driver," Eddie chokes out, laughing around each word, pressing his crotch into Steve's thigh.
Steve laughs, looking down at this ridiculous man clinging to him, "That you did. And damn well."
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genericpuff Ā· 6 months ago
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Lore Olympus just pulled off the biggest whiff in webtoon history.
I promised I would choose one of two headlines and of course, this is the one we wound up with. But should we really be surprised? Rachel herself seemed to be telling on herself down to the minutes leading up to the finale, fully confirming to us that yes, she's been writing this comic at the last minute, by the seat of her pants, for ages now.
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(that second one was literally posted TWENTY FUCKING MINUTES BEFORE THE COMIC UPDATED.)
Welp, let's get into it. Possibly the last essay I'll ever write about this dumpster fire of a comic (but probably not, let's be real LOL)
CONTENT WARNING: DISCUSSION OF SEXUAL ASSAULT AND FASTPASS SPOILERS FOR THE SERIES FINALE AHEAD!
Holy crap, where to even start with this. I knew it was going to be bad. I knew it was going to be rushed. I knew it wasn't ever going to live up to what I had hoped it would be years ago when I was still a diehard fan.
But I didn't think it was going to fall quite this hard. Despite bracing myself for the worst, Rachel has once again let my expectations down through a final display of explosive mediocrity and disappointment.
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Yes, the episode is called "You're Welcome", and yes, that instant "ick" you're feeling is the exact same as what we're all feeling. This title plays into the dialogue later, but what a shitty, lowkey mean-spirited title for the series finale.
Now, before we get into the actual episode, the WT ads for this are just... so desperate and misleading.
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They are trying SO HARD to hype up something that isn't there, and at the last minute to boot, because Rachel definitely hadn't written any of this ahead of time.
First off, the bit about the gods being in "eternal chaos" of course isn't a stake worth worrying over because Gaia literally does away with Ouranos in the first 5 panels.
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Did you really think I was joking about that 5 panels thing?
That's it. That's the death of Ouranos. As mysteriously and quickly as he arrived, he was gone, after Gaia ripped out of him what appeared to be some purple sunny side up - but it's actually, in fact, Apollo.
And that's when we start to get some of the worst dialogue I've ever seen throughout LO. Remember when I said LO's dialogue was like Shenmue 3? Welp, the finale decided to continue that tradition and further fuel the suspicion that this entire thing was written by ChatGPT.
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Oh, by the way, that "thank you, ma'am" was Artemis' first and last line of the episode. So once again, just like in Episode 248, we're completely robbed of her reaction to Apollo being a rapist piece of shit and the character development she could have had as a supporting character. The women in this "feminist retelling" really couldn't be more half-baked.
Gaia stumbles upon Persephone, and I'm not even gonna fucking bother showing the panels where Gaia says it's time to "make things right" because they literally don't matter. Why don't they matter? Because Rachel just had to get in one more pointless time skip.
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We're shown a sequence of pointless images that I'm not gonna show as I don't want to waste my image limit on them, depicting Hades having a sad day because his small wife isn't with him and oh nooo what could have happened?? Did Persephone finally divorce him ??
Nah, we couldn't possibly have an actually happy ending in this comic. Instead we get a completely pointless phone conversation between Hades and Hecate-
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Not only is the grammar particularly bad in this episode, but the actual script-writing is atrocious. We literally did not need this phone conversation to happen because-
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-we're cutting BACK TO THE PRESENT THAT WE JUST CUT AWAY FROM FOR A 3 MONTH TIME SKIP. FOR NO REASON BESIDES SHOWING HADES BE SAD OVER SOMETHING THAT ACTUALLY ISN'T THAT BIG A DEAL, AS YOU'RE ABOUT TO SEE.
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I- I LITERALLY HAVE NO WORDS. I HAVE NO WORDS TO DESCRIBE WHAT THE FUCK THIS IS. ALL I CAN HEAR IN MY BRAIN IS THE LEGEND OF ZELDA ITEM GET MUSIC-
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-BECAUSE THIS WHOLE THING SUDDENLY SOUNDS LIKE SOME CONTRIVED FETCH QUEST. WHAT DO YOU MEAN HADES AND PERSEPHONE HAVE PROVEN 'TRUE LOVE' IS REAL? WHAT DO YOU MEAN THEY HAVEN'T USED 'LOVE' AS A FORCE FOR DESTRUCTION?? ARE WE FORGETTING THAT HADES MUTILATED A GUY IN THE NAME OF 'LOVE'? THAT PERSEPHONE LITERALLY INVADED THE HOME OF HADES' CANONICAL FIRST WIFE BECAUSE SHE FELT MILDLY THREATENED BY HER?
This whole concept of "true love" that Rachel is trying to convey feels so juvenile especially for a series that has sold itself as being mature and thought-provoking and progressive.
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HAHAHA SO FUNNYYYYYYY why does Rachel write like this. this is, at best, the writing of a 13 year old on fanfiction.net, which I SHOULD KNOW, because I WAS ONE OF THEM. BUT I'M 28 NOW AND RACHEL HAS ANOTHER 10 YEARS ON ME.
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Okay, this is the part where I'm CONVINCED Rachel either just mashed this into the episode in the MINUTES leading up to its release, or she used ChatGPT or something. Because NONE of this dialogue makes any sense. Beyond how stilted and lifeless it is (seriously, this dialogue reads like something from Empress Theresa) Gaia is clearly meant to 'replace' Erebus here which I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO EVEN EXPLAIN IS SO FUCKING DUMB, but ALSO what is even Persephone trying to communicate here? "That is true, but it was a deal I was willing to make and ties me to the Underworld. Please don't change me." What? Gaia hasn't even insinuated that she's going to do anything to Persephone, why is Persephone immediately jumping to this conclusion? What does 'changing' her mean? Is she asking Gaia not to force her to sacrifice something (which she never did)? Or is she asking Gaia not to strip her of her Underworld status? Because again, why is that even something Gaia would do?
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Maybe this is harsh but I'm pretty sure even Empress Theresa is more coherent than this, what in the flying fuck is Gaia talking about?
"I can just see the potential for conflict! To relieve you from the burden of the whats, the hows, and wheres." Like... okay, first of all, that second sentence isn't even a complete sentence, it's a dependent clause left hanging, but also what the fuck does this MEAN. Is she EXCITED for the conflict but then contradicting herself by saying she wants to relieve Persephone of that conflict? Or is she saying she can see the conflict it would cause for Persephone to have to perform duties in both realms and trying to insinuate that she's going to relieve her of those complications?
Here's what I think happened - I think that second 'sentence' wasn't supposed to be a sentence, but the start of the sentence to the next panel-
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So with that theory in mind, the sentence becomes, "To relieve you from the burden of the whats, the hows, and wheres, you are to spend three months in the Mortal Realm to do spring and the rest of the year in the Underworld. That seems fair to me."
It's still a very poorly written line of dialogue, but at least with that fix in mind it makes sense. But man, you can really fucking tell this episode was submitted at the last minute because that's a serious syntax error that should NOT have happened in this two-time-Eisner-winning comic.
Errors aside, it's clear that Rachel is following through on having Persephone spend only three months in the Mortal Realm, rather than the traditional six. There ARE other translations that have that number closer to four, but those four are the time she spends in the UNDERWORLD, meaning she's always spending either equal or MORE time in the Mortal Realm. Of course, Rachel doesn't want her self-insert small wife power fantasy to actually have to be separated from Hades despite this being a retelling of The Abduction of Persephone, so instead of her spending three months in the Underworld, she's now spending them in the Mortal Realm, literally doubling the MINIMUM amount of time (four months) she was originally meant to reside in the Underworld.
But oh no, apparently those three months are STILL NOT SHORT ENOUGH FOR PERSEPHONE-
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Of course, Rachel "Retcon" Smythe had to have her cake and eat it too. I always worried something like this was a possibility, but I never thought she would actually prove me right - not only is Persephone only separated from Hades for three months out of the year, but actually he can visit her any time he wants to, so really, they're not separating at all.
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I think Rachel needs to look up "reunion" in the dictionary, because if you can visit each other any time, then that means the 'reunions' are no longer special occasions. This completely removes any semblance of depth or meaning from all of the storytelling leading up to this, all of it with the expectation that this was a retelling of the Abduction of Persephone, because that's what Rachel said it was going to be. At this point it's safe to say that Rachel has zero business attempting to "retell" mythological stories, because she doesn't even seem to grasp the concept of why they were written the way they were to begin with. Either that, or she really just doesn't care, and the only reason for making LO a Greek myth comic at all was to propel her career.
This also brings me back to those promotional ads, the other one that posed the question, "Will sacrifice be enough to bring these two back together?"
This is stating the obvious, but I need to make it perfectly clear - Hades and Persephone have never sacrificed a single thing. The only thing they could POSSIBLY quantify as a "sacrifice" is "not being tied at the hip for a few hours", because even Persephone going on the equivalent of a work trip next door is apparently enough to make Hades sad as we saw in the 3 month time skip panels. Why is Hades so sad and lonely if he can visit her any time? Why is he acting like he hasn't seen her in years when he's actually on his way to reunite with her? Why is Hecate calling to ask him if he's "okay" as if he JUST got separated from her, but actually he's about to literally go to the Mortal Realm to reunite with her?
Hades hasn't 'sacrificed' a damn thing, neither has Persephone. They've both always gotten exactly what they wanted, even at the cost of breaking the story's own established rules. Their 'sacrifice' is equivalent to what billionaires think are 'sacrifices' when they can't buy another yacht or go on that third overseas vacation for the month.
And even outside of this episode, when have these two ever sacrificed anything?
I've tried so hard to think of what sacrifices have been made by the characters within LO, and I genuinely can only think of one - and that was when Artemis chose to go to the Mortal Realm with Persephone instead of staying with her family in Olympus. That was a genuine, selfless sacrifice, made by a character who has been shelved in favor of focusing on the self-centered pink and blue airheads.
Being forced to be apart for a couple days to do the equivalent of a day job and whining about it the whole time is not a 'sacrifice'. Neither of these characters have ever sacrificed anything, they just feel like sacrifices because they have the integrity and empathy of soggy cardboard.
sigh Anyways, we're back in the present and Hades and Persephone immediately decide they're gonna have sex because ofc, and then we get this gem of a panel-
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MMMMMM
FUNNYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY JOKE
For some reason it's just a common thing for people to just be in Hades' home, and they can't seem to get any privacy as a result of this, but I digress. Turns out they still need to have that coronation for Persephone.
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There is... so much wrong in these three panels.
First, to state the immediate issues - why the fuck are they mentioning Apollo at Persephone's coronation? Like first of all, no shit Apollo isn't gonna be there, but also, if this is supposed to be an event for and about Persephone becoming Queen of the Underworld, then why in the WORLD is Apollo even being mentioned? This is supposed to be a "feminist retelling" where the victims are empowered and heal from their trauma, but LO once again can't try to show any sort of positive growth for the victims without bringing up the assaulters and giving them screen time. It just goes to show that Rachel's idea of "healing" is purely rooted in the revenge, and not the growth. It's a very high schooler approach to this subject, hellbent on showcasing how all the meanies from the past are losers now and life just sucked for them forever, but inadvertently proving its own point that the victims haven't and can't move on because the narrative is spending so much time on caring what's going on with the abusers. It's the "I don't care! Look at how little I care! I'll prove it to you by putting in the effort of showing you how little I care!" approach, it doesn't really feel like moving on.
It's not about how Persephone and his other victims could have grown and healed, no, Rachel always needs to highlight just how much worse the bullies and haters and abusers are doing to make the victims seem like they've healed by comparison. Don't get me wrong, I can understand wanting to showcase the downfall of a character like Apollo, but this just... isn't the right context for that? Because it's once again taking attention away from the victim to focus on the abuser. It's once again spending screentime on the voices of the oppressors rather than the oppressed.
And speaking of, what the fuck is this punishment even? I knew Rachel wasn't gonna be able to resolve this plotline properly, she never had the capability to, but ... community service? Are you fucking for real? What is this even a punishment for even? Was this EXCLUSIVELY the SA, or does this ALSO include his attempts to overthrow Zeus by poisoning him, nearly killing Daphne, Eris, Eros and Psyche, trapping Eros and Psyche in an enchanted basement, and framing his father's 'death' on his half-sister? Because if so, how in the world is anyone content with community service? He hasn't even been turned into a mortal, HE'S STILL A GOD, so what's to stop him from going "WE'LL MEET AGAIN, SPIDERMAN" and trying something else? How is this a reasonable resolution in ANY context?
This is why I talked at length about what an issue it was to hide what Apollo really admitted to. Because now we really don't know what exactly he confessed to, and thus we can never really see the point of views of the victims outside of just Persephone - and we still don't even get Persephone's, because she just walks away from him and then he gets eaten by Ouranos and next we see of him is him doing community service! Once again, any emotional development that could be given to Persephone and the other victims is stripped away to make room for the point of views of the oppressive men. In this, the two-time-Eisner-winning "feminist comic" that is LO.
And that brings us to the "where are they now" segment. Yes, as we all feared, there's a "where are they now" segment, and it's as rushed and underwhelming as we ought to have expected it to be.
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There is just... so much to unpack here, and yes, all of it is delivered in the dumbest way possible that only raises more questions than answers.
So Rhea and Metis are just back and we're not gonna talk about the implications of them being alive again?
Dionysus is a 3 month year old in the body of a teenager / young adult, and his mom is just alive now because Hades conveniently got his hands on more ambrosia and brought her back to life offscreen? But somehow Triptomelus and Hedone are still child-sized relative to their ages?
How did they 'heal Zeus'? And why is he so content with losing his power as King and Apollo being sentenced to community service after making an attempt on his life? How does he feel about the letter that Hera gave him? Did he even read it?
Where the fuck is Hebe in all of this? Is she okay? Do people still think it was her who put Zeus in a coma? Or did Apollo confess to that, too?
You're telling me Hera and Echo are just in a relationship now despite the fact that Hera is literally racist towards nymphs and there is ZERO reason for them to have a relationship in the comic beyond the fans making gratuitous headcanons out of it? How is Rachel, a bisexual woman, so bad at writing actual lesbian relationships and giving them the same amount of attention as the heterocis ones without shoving them into the background as props for insincere queer rep? And what about Hera herself? How did she overcome her role as the Goddess of Marriage to finally divorce Zeus?
"Ares is still a dog!" Haha! Ares is still a Persephone simp! Happy end!
Why is Eros just standing there smiling at the camera struggling to be seen past Hedone who's just floating right in front of him? You're telling me there wasn't a better place to put her out of that entire panel?
"Hades and Thanatos have been making more time for each other. Sometimes they even have a conversation." I'm sorry, is this supposed to be funny? The man abused Thanatos for years, treated him as just a lowly employee when he was literally his adopted son, and now you're trying to play it off as a joke that they're "making more time for each other"? What the fuck is this?
TGOEM disbanded? Why? What about the women who were genuinely a part of it?
Also, Artemis and Selene are just good friends now because reasons? Because they're both affiliated with the moon, I guess? Why is Selene even in this comic-
"They are still looking for Kassandra". Who? And why? This feels like such a last minute addition to acknowledge a character that the comic spent WEEKS foreshadowing only to have her finally appear as a pointless McGuffin, but it's so last minute that it does nothing. I'm assuming it's Eros and Psyche looking for her, but like... why can't they find her? They're gods, tracking down one mortal shouldn't be that difficult LOL ???
And also, where the fuck is Leto?? You're telling me she was an accessory - maybe manipulating Apollo, maybe not - but we don't see what happened to her? Is she just back to being a social outcast then? jesus christ this comic isn't finished-
Kassandra is where the "where are they now" sequence ends, and we're treated to one final horribly written dialogue scene between Hades and Persephone, where they tell each other how much they love each other in a desperate attempt to convince the audience that this is, in fact, a romance.
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There's this thing in romances called chemistry, and if you're good at writing it, you shouldn't have to write dialogue like this. You should be able to see how much the characters love each other through their actions, through their small behaviors around each other. It's not always about what they say out loud, it's about what they don't have to say, because when two people really share that close of a bond based on love and trust and chemistry, words often aren't necessary.
Hades and Persephone do not have that chemistry. It has been apparent for years now, but this final exchange really is the nail in the coffin. There are no microexpressions or subtle emotions, no subtlety in their word choice, and nothing unique setting their voices apart. It's all just "wow thank you for being such a wonderful amazing partner, you are amazing and I love you" word salad that has to do all the heavy lifting for the completely non-existent chemistry that's been at its absolute worst throughout this entire season.
And worst of all, despite this story trying so hard to be focused around Persephone, around her story, her trauma and her healing, her voice... it's still all just about Hades. In the end, she's thanking Hades, and forcing him to say "you're welcome". All of it is trying so hard to convince us that Hades has been a positive addition to her life, that she 'owes' so much to him, but we've obviously seen plenty throughout the comic that begs to differ. And even if he were a better person than he is, it still doesn't change the fact that once again, the men are being held up above the women, with the women being grateful to the men who choose them. LO can try its hardest to convince people that it's feminist, but it is, at best, reinforcing the very same structures of the patriarchal system that it claims to despise and rebel against.
We do get one line from Hades acknowledging Persephone's part in the relationship-
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-and it falls so fucking flat because it's still about him and what she does for him, and because nothing about their relationship was built on any sort of organic chemistry. There was a lot more chemistry back in S1, but it was still predicated on Hades lusting after a vulnerable 19 year old girl.
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Yep, and that's it. That's the end.
Except it isn't because Rachel wanted to try and be smart by including an 'epilogue' that's really just stretching the episode out pointlessly for another few panels. And of course, we had to get another time skip, just a final dose of salt in the wound, this time to years ahead when we inevitably had to reconnect with Persephone and Hades in the future after Melinoe was born.
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To recap, Melinoe doesn't remember... because Hades had Morpheus erase her memories.
This plotline has really started to give me the ick because it actually feels very familiar. Bear with me here, because I'm gonna go on a bit of a tangent about my own original work, but it's because I wrote a plotline exactly like this years ago.
There's this... turning point, in Time Gate: Reaper, when the main character Uzuki is kidnapped by a Reaper (see: undead) who wants to experiment on her in the hopes that he can somehow gain her abilities to bond her soul with others (which later allows her to literally possess people after she becomes a Reaper herself). Mitsuhiro, the male deuteragonist who kickstarts the plot by telling Uzuki she's got a limited amount of time left to live (which he knows thanks to his magical death timers that mark themselves on his skin), feels an immense amount of guilt after finding out she was kidnapped by the Reapers (at this point she's been gone for three months), as they were originally after him; he worries that she was made a target simply due to him associating himself with her, and vows to rescue her.
With the help of some other spunky teenagers and anime trope characters, Mitsuhiro does eventually rescue Uzuki - but for the three months she had been gone, she had been tortured, abused, and experimented on, causing her mind to split and for her to lose any sense of awareness of who Mitsuhiro or her other friends were. She was no longer herself after the hell she had been through.
Mitsuhiro's solution to this is to have Springlock - another Reaper with motivations that are not yet clear to the cast - erase her memory. This is not a light decision that comes without consequences - for the remaining duration of the story, Uzuki is plagued by night terrors and panic attacks, unable to really remember what happened to her aside from whatever brief flashbacks her brain recalls in its haze of memory loss. She is traumatized, both physically and mentally. She has lost three months of her life and memories, and doesn't know how to explain why she's covered in scars that are still healing, why she's missing organs, why she's now blind in one eye, and why the sound of scraping metal and ticking clocks gives her panic attacks. Mitsuhiro has convinced her friends that she's suffering from memory loss due to trauma, but only he knows the truth that he forcefully took her memories away from her, without her consent. This was not the right choice to make. It was not noble of him, it was not a grand gesture of love, he made a decision on her behalf without her consent that has now resulted in her becoming a nervous wreck. Sure, she still would have had PTSD if she remembered what happened, but at least she would know why and could then seek adequate help. Without those memories, she has nowhere to begin to heal. And so we see the consequences of this throughout [AFTERBIRTH] and even the upcoming Thread of Fate. It is a long-term problem that is not going to be solved overnight, especially not with Mitsuhiro withholding information from her.
Reading about Melinoe having dreams about her experiences trapped in Tartarus with Kronos ... it felt familiar enough that I had to talk about why the insinuations of this are so fucked up. I know there are people who are gonna handwave it away as "she's just a kid", "these are gods so what does it matter", etc. but ... it just feels like such an oversight to have Hades effectively erase her memory of her trauma and then hint at them still being present in her mind through her dreams. She did not ask for that. And the fact that she's now dreaming about it all does not bode well. But we're supposed to think Hades made the correct choice, regardless.
But none of this is effectively expanded on or explained, because we get one final scene of Melinoe and Demeter visiting Persephone, who has just given birth to... Makaria?
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So it turns out Persephone and Hades are just able to have biological children now. Don't know why, but of course they both look exactly like Hades.
What I was really confused by though is the fact that it's Makaria and not Brimos. Do you remember Brimos? The child that was foreshadowed in Hades' original fantasy dream sequence about his future children about Persephone?
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Either Rachel completely forgot about him, or she saw all the criticism over the fact that Brimos isn't a confirmed child of Hades and Persephone (rather, an epithet that can apply to basically any Underworld god including Persephone and Hades) and that her "research" was dependent on a book she read when she was 13 and decided to axe that. But she went to the effort of establishing that all the dreams Hades had were , in fact, canon visions of the future, so good job Rachel, you created yet another plothole on top of the hundreds of others.
And that's where the series ends, on a final nuclear-family-photo of Persephone, Hades, Melinoe, and Makaria. Of course, Dionysus and Thanatos aren't present in this shot because this is Lore Olympus and only biological children count /hj
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Why Rachel couldn't move the "the end" portion to THIS part, I don't know, but I'm also expecting way too much of the person who finished this 20 minutes before it was due.
So that's it. Six years and that's what we get. I didn't expect much, but I was still incredibly disappointed, as were many others who walked away from this dazed and confused. Maybe it's all the "haters" deserve at this point. But what of the fans? While many of them are celebrating this ending at best and tolerating it at worst, I can't help but think of the fans of this comic who hung on for so long in the hopes it would "pay off", just for it to go out as gloriously as a wet fart.
As for me, I have such mixed feelings about Lore Olympus ending, but none of them pertain to the comic itself. Most of what I'll miss from this comic isn't the comic itself, but the people who have made reading it every week so fun, the artists and writers who have enriched the content with their own interpretations of what could have been, and the experiences of being part of such an amazing community made up of people who are as long-term-obsessed about this piece of media as I am.
I get people who ask me a lot if it's "worth it" to be so engrossed in the LO slander, who assume that I'm going to "regret" ever being a part of it all... but from where I'm standing right now, I couldn't ask for a better view.
Even if I didn't love every minute of it, everything I have here I owe to this comic. This stupid, wonderful, boring, amazing, pile of shit comic.
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ariaste Ā· 16 days ago
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Time to repost the hopepunk manifesto I wrote the first time we went through this shit.
ā€œHopepunk says [about human nature], ā€˜The glass is half full,ā€™ā€ wrote the me who lived in mid-2017. Seems naĆÆve now, doesnā€™t it? Those are the words of a person cloaked in a story that hasnā€™t yet been worn threadbare and ragged; a person who thinks they have a sword in their hands, a person who thinks that they as an individual can make a difference, that there is some fundamental goodness in humanity. What do we do when our hands are empty, when our warm cloaks are gone, when we look around and see how big the world is? When we see how helpless and insignificant we are, how the rest of the world isnā€™t even particularly cruel or evil, just . . . mediocre? Complacent? If there are gods watching over us, please, please deliver us from complacency. And if there arenā€™t, if weā€™re all alone in the dark and our candles are guttering: What do we do? How can we go on? Whatā€™s the point? [...] And the answer is, of course, that the fight itself is the point. Itā€™s not about glory or noble deeds; itā€™s not about an end result because there is no end. Thereā€™s always a tomorrow and when the sun rises again, weā€™ll still have a dam holding the water back. For now. But entropy is real, and dams must be maintained, and it takes all of us to do it, and itā€™s done by linking arms with the people next to you, by building a community with deliberate intent. Itā€™s about how the first step to slaying a dragon is for one person to say, probably drunk in a bar somewhere, ā€œI bet it can be done, though.ā€ Itā€™s about being kind merely for the sake of kindness, and because you have the means to be, and giving a fuck because the world is (somehow, mysteriously, against all evidence) worth it and we donā€™t have anywhere else to go anyway. Itā€™s about digging in your heels and believing that one single atom of justice, one molecule of mercy does exist somewhere in the mindboggling vastness of the universeā€”believing in that, even if for no other reason than fuck you, buddy; fuck you, fuck you, fuck you. I do what I want and this, this is what I want; this is the world I want to live in: One where the atom of justice exists, even if Iā€™ve never seen it myself, even if Iā€™ll never see it.
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unclewaynemunson Ā· 1 year ago
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Alt version of this post bc too many people asked for both &lt;3
It's Saturday night and, like almost every Saturday night, Eddie wishes he didn't have to be at some jock party. The flashing lights, the scent of cheap mixed drinks, the incredibly mediocre loud music... And worst of all, the fucking jocks. Everywhere.
'Eddie!'
He looks up to find Steve, with a dopey smile on his face, basically skipping towards him and throwing his arms around his neck. Oh. He didn't know Steve still went to parties like those. Hadn't seen him at any of them in a while. But as soon as he gets wrapped up in an enthusiastic full-body hug, he decides there's one jock, and one jock only, that he doesn't mind running into at those parties.
'Eddie, what're you doin' here?' There's an unfocused look in his eyes and he wobbles on his legs a little bit, grabbing tighter onto Eddie for support. The touch burns through Eddie's t-shirt and he tries to ignore the shiver running down his spine.
'I didn't know you liked parties!' Steve drops his voice, slurring: 'I thought you hated the jocks.'
Eddie can't help but smile. 'I hate all jocks but one, big boy,' he tells Steve. 'Not here to party, only to get some cash.' He rattles with the metal lunchbox in his hands to illustrate his point. 'Can you let me go now so I can get on with my business, pretty please?'
'Noooo,' Steve says with an exaggerated pout. 'I'm too happy you're here! Dance with me!'
Eddie chuckles. 'I don't think you're in any state to dance right now. Jesus, Stevie, I don't think I've ever seen you this wasted before. Thought you were planning to pick up a girl tonight?'
'I was,' Steve says, suddenly sounding oddly serious. 'But it doesn't matter. Just needed to forget. The rum helped, too.' He frowns. 'Til you showed up.'
'Forget what?' Eddie asks, trying to make sense of this drunken string of words.
Something happens; something that's been happening quite often lately. Steve's eyes flash downwards, just for a second, right to where Eddie's lips are.
Eddie's heartbeat involuntarily picks up speed.
'What did you need to forget, Steve?' Eddie asks again.
'Can't tell you,' Steve mumbles so softly that Eddie can barely make it out over the loud music. 'I don't wanna make you feel guilty. I'm not judging you, y'know. 'S fine.'
He abruptly lets go of Eddie and takes a step away from him, stumbling right into some girl who pushes him back with an annoyed scoff; if Eddie weren't still standing right behind him, he would've fallen on his ass for sure.
'Alright, you're not making any sense tonight, big boy, but I can't in good conscience let you stay here by yourself. How 'bout I'll drive you home?'
Eddie glances at his watch. If he hurries, he can probably still be back to do what he came here for before the good part of the party is over. He does kinda need the cash.
'Can't,' says Steve. 'Can't go home with you.' Something in his voice is breaking and suddenly there are tears in his eyes, and Eddie still doesn't understand what's wrong; he feels like he's overlooking something huge, something that should be obvious.
'Let's just go outside to talk, then?' he suggests.
'Can't. Dance with me, Eddie.'
But when Eddie starts gently tugging Steve towards the open door leading to the garden, Steve easily lets himself be led outside. He closes his eyes and takes a deep breath when the cool night air reaches his lungs, as if one gulp of fresh air will instantly make him sober up. But he's still swaying on his feet, making Eddie grab onto him tighter.
Eddie likes to think of himself as moderately strong, but unfortunately, hauling 180 pounds of muscled jock around is starting to take its toll on him. He spots a bench in a secluded corner of the garden and guides Steve towards it.
'This better?' he asks.
'Yeah,' Steve breathes out. Even now that they're both sitting down, Steve keeps clinging onto him. 'Look at the stars, Eddie.'
Eddie looks up at the scattering of lights twinkling far above them - but he can feel Steve's eyes still burning into his face.
When he directs his gaze back to the guy sitting next to him, Steve's face is even closer than before. The starlight is reflected in his hazy eyes, tiny specks of silver hidden in various shades of brown and black.
'I wish I could kiss you,' Steve whispers, looking at Eddie with nothing but admiration behind that glassy drunk gaze.
Eddie almost forgets to breathe. He knows that it seemed like he and Steve were headed exactly toward something like this for a while now, but he still can hardly believe that it is real. That Steve Harrington is really looking at him like he's just as precious as the stars in the sky above them.
He brings up a hand, gently caresses Steve's soft cheek.
'Maybe you don't have to wish,' he whispers back, unable to stop his eyes from flashing towards Steve's beautiful lips for a moment. 'Tomorrow. When you're not drunk anymore. If you still remember this.'
'No.' Steve shakes his head, so fiercely it makes his hair flap in all directions and his complexion at least two shades paler. 'Can't.'
'Why do you keep saying that, Steve?' Eddie asks softly.
'Cause.' For a moment Eddie thinks Steve is gonna grab his ass, but then... he randomly frees Eddie's handkerchief ā€“ the one with the skulls ā€“ from his back pocket.
'Cause of the Russians.'
Eddie can only stare at him in confusion.
'They tied me up,' Steve all but whispers. Eddie hates how small and broken his voice suddenly sounds.
He has always known ā€“ broadly speaking ā€“ about what happened to Steve and Robin miles beneath Starcourt last year. He's never actually heard Steve talk about the details, though. All he knows is that he and Robin were captured by Russian spies and somehow made it out alive. He could always see how difficult it was for Steve to talk about it whenever it came up, but he never wanted to pry. And now here they are, at some goddamn high school jock party of all places, and all of a sudden Steve willingly brings it up.
'I was with Robin,' Steve continues, still in that scared and broken voice. 'And they tied us to a chair. We couldn't move. And they ā€“ they hurt me. They hit me. 'Til I was bleeding all over. I thought I was gonna die. Robin thought I was dead.'
'Jesus Christ, Steve,' Eddie breathes out, tightening his grip around Steve's torso.
'So I can't,' Steve mumbles, holding up Eddie's handkerchief as if it's some kind of logical explanation for whatever it is he's trying to tell Eddie.
'Wh- What?'
'I know what it means, Eddie,' he says, as if he's even remotely making sense right now. 'You know John?'
'Who the hell is John?' Eddie only keeps finding himself more and more lost in this conversation.
'My cousin,' Steve says, like it's obvious, like he's ever talked about some cousin named John to Eddie before. 'The one in New York. He knows all about that shit, right? He sends me the good magazines sometimes when my parents aren't home. That's how I know.'
'Know what?'
Steve only waves around with that stupid handkerchief again.
'You're flagging, aren't ya? You like pain. Like BS... BM...'
Eddie feels his jaw drop.
'What the fuck are you talking about?' he asks. 'It's ā€“ this is a metal thing. It looks metal. I literally have no idea what you're ā€“ flagging?'
Now Steve's face finally mirrors the confusion Eddie has been feeling for the past ten minutes.
'Are you serious?' he asks, for one second showing more clarity in his eyes than Eddie has seen all evening.
Eddie nods.
'So it's not...' Steve stops himself, swallows, frowns. 'You're not into, like, hurting people and shit?'
And finally, it all clicks together in Eddie's mind: the repeated chorus of I can't, the story about the Russians, the goddamn handkerchief... Flagging. BDSM.
'Why the hell would I get off on hurting you, Steve?' is all he can get out of his mouth.
And Steve honest-to-Satan starts giggling; it sounds so relieved that Eddie kinda feels like giggling too, scary metal image be damned.
'I dunno, it's more common than you think,' Steve mumbles. 'I wouldn't judge you, alright? But I knew I could never give you that. No matter how much I like you. And then you'd get bored of me.'
'Oh, Steve,' Eddie whispers out. 'You don't need to worry 'bout that, I swear. For all I care, we can have the most vanilla sex in the world forever. Or never have sex at all. As long as it's with you... I'm good.' Eddie cringes as soon as the words leave his mouth: it sounds too cheesy, too sincere. He kinda hopes Steve will have forgotten this particular part of their conversation tomorrow morning.
But Steve doesn't look at him like he thinks it's stupid at all: his eyes are wide and he's smiling a soft smile.
'You sure? You won't get bored?'
Eddie chuckles. Now that he's being too goddamn cheesy anyway, he might as well double down on it. 'I can't imagine getting bored of getting to hold this body in a million fucking years. In any way you'll have me.'
Steve heaves out a relieved sigh before he buries his head against Eddie's chest.
'Can I bring you home, now?' Eddie asks.
There's a twinkle in Steve's eyes when he lifts his head again.
'Ooohhh... You wanna have the most vanilla sex in the world with me now?'
A chortle escapes Eddie's lungs.
'Um, maybe tomorrow, when you're not drunk off your ass,' he answers with a wink. 'For tonight, just lemme get you to bed, 'kay?'
'Okay, big boy,' Steve answers, and Eddie can't help but laugh before he presses a kiss against Steve's forehead.
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