#in smallville this happened in season TEN

[jq37]

Damn they’re really speed-running the whole Lois/Clark/Superman dynamic in this show, huh?

[comicaurora]

One thing I noticed is ever since MAWSM came out is how people in discussions have been decreasingly calling Clark "Superman" and now almost exclusively refer to him with his real name. Yeah, of course. He is Clark first and foremost. The farmboy from Smallville, Kansas; reporter at the Daily Planet. Superman is an extension of Clark. He's not like the other dude whose hero persona is his core identity. He's just a normal guy at heart who happens to be indestructible. He's just... Clark.

I think it's because until My Adventures With Superman, his primary cartoon presence was in series that were overtly superhero shows with threat-of-the-week formats, where Clark's life was the two-minute framing sequence around Superman getting to do the good stuff. Even the original Fleischer superman cartoon was ten-minute shorts that couldn't afford to go slice-of-life when they could be animating Superman punching a hole in a jet.

There have been little moments that hinted at this in other series - the Justice League episode Comfort and Joy springs to mind, being one of the only downtime episodes the team gets, where J'onn sees Clark back home on the farm with Ma and Pa Kent and is surprised at how relaxed and genuine he is when he isn't "working", aka "being superman." But for the most part Clark doesn't get that kind of personal focus, and the seasons that center on him are entirely about Superman's villains and the risk of Superman becoming a despot like his Justice Lord counterpart.

Live-action shows have been a little better about this, if only because of the SFX requirements of superman meaning it's cheaper and simpler to lean into Hometown Hero Clark Kent, exemplified in the series Smallville, which had an actual development policy that Clark was never allowed to put on the cape or costume. It started as teen drama where the protagonist just happened to have superpowers and a weird allergy to green rocks, and for a while it even had a similar gimmick to MAWS, where every other episode he developed a new power or discovered a new trait of his physiology that the audience was already expected to know about. But the problem there is that the audience also has the biggest point of dramatic irony hanging over their heads for the entire show - we know Clark's destiny is to become Superman. So while the show is ABOUT Clark, there's this tonal undercurrent that most of the messy things that make him Clark are things he'll eventually outgrow.

I think what's making My Adventures With Superman work is that it's (a) deeply sincere and (b) centered on the thesis that Clark is an emotional, vulnerable person AND ALSO a flying invulnerable brick with laser eyes, and his stress over his powers isn't just "aw it's tough to be a god now put on the tights already" but it's the very reasonable "I don't know why I'm like this, I don't understand what it means or if it's dangerous, I can't stop breaking the things I touch but I don't want to be alone."

Clark's isolation has always been something other characters muse about privately (usually Batman) or a bit of fridge logic he turns into a cool boast (the World of Cardboard speech reframing every fight he's ever been in by telling the audience he is 100% pulling his punches ALL THE TIME) but to my knowledge it's never been played for this deeply impactful and HIGHLY resonant "there is Something Wrong With Me that I don't have a name for but I will regardless find a way to live with myself and the people I love."

When Superman is framed as Clark's inevitable destiny, we lose sight of the fact that Clark is, by necessity, the kind of person who would create Superman.

[ploppythespaceship]

My Adventures with Superman is so good. They found a fresh take on the characters and the setting while still feeling true to the core appeal. It's charming, it looks great, it just feels nice to watch. I know it's hooked plenty of people who never had an interest in Superman before.

My only issue is unfortunately a rather large one -- the season is too short. And I don't just mean that in the sense that it's a good show and I want more. The character and relationship development is painfully rushed, and desperately needed more time to breathe.

First off, Lois works out who Clark is in episode four. Episode four! Where's the buildup to the big reveal? Where's the drama? The tension of their relationship getting closer as Clark debates whether or not to let her in on the big secret, knowing it will put her in danger? And the final moment where the shoe drops, with her either finding out on her own or him stepping up to tell her? This show skipped right past ALL of that. I know it's very possible to drag that part of the story out for far too long just to milk it for drama -- see Smallville if you want the ultimate example -- but that doesn't mean there's no value to it at all. It's always one of my favorite parts of the Superman story, and it just had no weight in this one.

Then, Clark and Lois' relationship. I'm fine with them being into each other from day one, that's cute, but saying their I-love-you's by episode nine? Being in THAT committed of a relationship that quickly? We barely know these characters! They barely know each other! It's been maybe a couple months for them, at most? Not nearly long enough for this to be believable, or have any real weight. Again, where is the buildup?

And lastly, the big moment in episode nine when Lois convinces Metropolis to come together to help Superman, the way he's helped them so many times... it just doesn't land. Because again, this is episode nine. It has not been long enough for the people of Metropolis to develop that kind of faith in him. Especially when you consider that Clark only saved Metropolis in three of those nine episodes -- the rest of the time he was away from the city or elsewhere in the multiverse. (Supergirl did a similar scene in its first season, where the people of National City step up to save her when she's down, but that happens in episode eighteen, after appropriate buildup.)

I do think once Lois worked out the truth, the pacing from there to end flowed fairly well. It just needed to wait longer to kick off. The season really could have used another five to ten episodes. I think modern TV shows have become too afraid of "filler" -- they're scared that if an episode doesn't advance the overall plot it's not even worth watching. But sometimes you need those smaller moments to let things to breathe, and to further develop the characters. This show is a prime example of that.

[jadelotusflower]

Stargate rewatch: 1x20 Politics

We pick up right where the last episode left off, Daniel getting his shoulder wound treated and trying to explain the alternate reality to his sceptical team.

It’s funny to see the team not really believing Daniel because it’s still early in the run, whereas later on any of them could say the weirdest shit happened and the rest of them would just roll with it no questions asked.

Jack: “And you were there, and you were there, and there’s no place like home.” Daniel: “As a matter of fact, you were there.” Heh. Is Daniel just frustrated or did he not get the Wizard of Oz reference? Works either way.

I’m curious how the team thinks Daniel got shot by a staff weapon if it was all a dream though.

“Yes but the defining event, the death of Ra, took place in both worlds.” A bit of a logic leap by Daniel but hey, it’s what he does.

This is a clip show. I give SG-1 a lot of credit for actually making an effort with their clip shows, always building them around an in-universe plot to give context and cause. They’re still annoying to watch in these days of binging, but they’re as successful as they can be.

Written by Brad Wright (not including excerpts) and directed by Martin Wood.

“How’s our boy?” I find this very cute? Hammond really is the mama duck to SG-1’s ducklings, the epitome of restrained affection.

His absolute and obvious disdain for Samuels is also a real treat. He rolls his eyes!

Samuels is played by Robert Wisden, who was also briefly in Smallville as Chloe's father Gabe. Both shows were based in Vancouver, and both ran for ten seasons, so there's quite the guest star crossover.

In a private meeting with Jack, Hammond goes from “this is what I look like when I’m not laughing, Colonel” to almost laughing when Jack cracks another joke. I love Hammond so much.

I think Ronny Cox as Kinsey is actually the longest running villain in the entire show? Apophis finally bites it in season 5, but Kinsey makes it all the way to season 8.

“And this must be the drain through which the money flows” is such a great line for a pontificating blowhard politician, as is his hypocritical speech. You immediately know who Kinsey is, and you hate him even though he’s actually right about a lot of stuff.

“Oh you’re right, we’ll just upload a computer virus into the mothership.” lol, the shade at Devlin/Emmerich here.

We get a date for the Chulak mission - 10 February (presumably) 1997. The computer in the previous episode indicated it was December 1997 so assuming time was the same in the alternate universe, it's been approximately 11 months since the pilot which seems about right.

The purpose of the mission is described as “to rescue both Dr Jackson’s wife and her brother, and determine the Goa’uld threat” which is the first mention we’ve had of Sha’re and Skaara in a while.

lol, Jack looking to Sam to give the correct pronunciation of Goa’uld because he doesn’t want to.

Lt Colonel “secondary objective” Samuels being the one to read from Jack’s report about Skaara being chosen really twists the knife.

“Because what is right cannot be measured by strength.” Great Teal’c line.

Argos gets discussed and it’s mentioned that SG-2 made recent contact with them - a nice little background aspect of the show that they do check in on the worlds they’ve visited from time to time.

Much is made of the lack of benefit to the Stargate program - guess that wonder drug from Emancipation didn’t pan out? Or maybe everyone just wants to forget that episode happened.

Sidebar - with all the clips it’s obvious that Daniel’s hair has been getting longer throughout the season - irl because Michael Shanks’ hair was shorter and was growing it out as filming progressed to get that Daniel look, but my headcanon in universe is that Sha’re used to trim it for him on Abydos, and since her abduction he can’t bring himself to get it cut

There’s an ongoing metaphor by Kinsey for the Stargate being a Pandora’s Box that’s kind of apt, the box (jar) being a gift from the gods intended to punish mankind after Prometheus gifted them fire, with humanity as Pandora, eternally curious and unable to resist peeking inside.

The show never had a Goa’uld character who took on the persona of Prometheus, Epimetheus, or even Pandora, which was kind of a missed opportunity.

Samuels the slimeball is “sorry it had to end like this” and Hammond rightly tells him to gtfo.

Nice crossfade, Mr Wood.

The Stargate shut down, the threat of an imminent attack - all in all, a good setup going into the season finale!

[evilwickedme]

Thoughts on Batman by Jewishness?

This one's harder mostly because Batman has had like a million fucking movies and shows and I have not seen even close to all of them - I didn't even find him that compelling as a character until I got into his children. Also we're defining Batman as Bruce Wayne because obviously Dick Grayson isn't Jewish and I don't know anything about Terry McGinnis and evil future Batman!Tim Drake might be Jewish but he's essentially a recurring what if character. Ok here we go

In last place we have Batfleck. Even if Ben Affleck had any interest in portraying Bruce Wayne jewishally, he sucked and I hate him in the role, so I'm giving him a -5/10 just for being in bad movies. Fuck you pick better scripts

After that we have the Dark Knight Trilogy Batman. Extremely well made and enjoyable movies. Not much like comic Batman imo. 1/10

Next we have Battinson. I actually don't mind this movie! I don't like it nearly as much as it seemed everybody else had, and I really wish we could get a Batman movie that acknowledges he has a fucking family in the year of our lord 5783, but it's still a good movie. However, no indication that Bruce is Jewish. I do however think this Bruce is way funnier, so extra points for making me laugh out loud in the theater repeatedly. 3/10

Up next is Lego Batman from the Lego Batman movie. I don't know he just gives me good vibes. He's got a Robin, which automatically puts him closer to comic canon than any other filmic version of Batman, making him Jewish by association. 5/10 I guess

I only watched one season of Gotham but hey, it was a pretty good season before I realized what I really wanted to be watching was Smallville, which I then proceeded to watch all ten seasons of over the course of four weeks (I was in, how you say, a depression). I probably would've watched more (see: in a depression), but there was only one season in existence at the time. It seemed fine to me, although I know a lot more about Batman now than I did then, but it seemed decently connected to the spirit of the comics. Bonus points for David Mazouz being a Jewish actor - the only Jewish actor on this list fyi - but at least in the one season I watched, he was not confirmed Jewish, so let's say a 7/10 (is this technically even a Batman? I have no idea what happens in the later seasons)

Finally we have our main continuity comic book Batman, the only (afaik) canonically Jewish Batman on this list! Batman was made Jewish by association when his maternal cousin, Kate Kane aka Batwoman, was created as an explicitly Jewish character. Sidenote, she's a great character and I adore her. But yeah although he is essentially canonically Jewish it's never actually addressed within his stories - he's only ever spoken about his father being Christian and him not following in his footsteps, as far as I know. I give it a 9/10, losing a point for only being Jewish on a technicality. DC, like Marvel, are also cowards

Honorable mention to any animated movie based directly on a comic such as the Under the Red Hood movie being Jewish by association as well. Let's give that archetype of Bruce a 7.5/10

[lexkent]

is there a specific episode of smallville you can point to where things all went to hell storyline wise for smallville? or a stopping point throughout the show where one could peacefully make sense of it as an elseworlds arc instead of the ten season contradiction it became?

so I usually recommend stopping at Onyx (4x17) because I think it's the last enjoyable episode before things turn to shit. But be sure to stop before the last Lex and Lionel scene(last 5 minutes or so of the episode) because who wants to end their watch on a ~Luthor's are inherently Evil~ note

but I've started to think maybe it's better to stop sooner because there really are so many awful episodes in s4 before we get to 4x17. like the garbage that was Lionel being transformed Good because Clark's soul was inside of him(4x06). when the writers thought they could just switch Lex and Lionel's roles and that would be cool somehow, it was over.

So that makes me want to recommend stopping at 3x22 right after the scene where Clark agrees to testify against Lionel. Because Hey, Clark & Lex are finally teaming up to take down the true evil force of the show and it's looking hopeful. That seems like a good stopping point. But be sure to stop right there or you'll face the scene where Clark finds Lex's Room and ends the friendship.

But then I think about how at that point in the series we've already watched Clark abandon Lex to rot in Belle Reve and then lie to him about it and deliberately hide what happened despite it putting Lex deeper into danger. That's the point Smallville officially soured actually. Maybe we avoid that.

So I think the most galaxy brain point to stop is probably in "Asylum" when Clark FINALLY breaks in to rescue Lex, and Lex says, "I knew you'd come." And Clark says "Let's get you out of here" and Lex says "All this time, I was right about you" and gives Clark that look of absolute wonder 🛑turn off the tv right at that moment to be happy and free🛑

basically I'd say if you primarily care about getting as much of Lex in as you can, he's reasonably in character up through 4x17 and that there are some episodes up to that point worth watching for him. if you care more about Clex and/or want to avoid seeing Lex treated like absolute garbage by everyone, the best point to stop is probably where I described in 3x09

[sunnydaleherald]

The Sunnydale Herald Newsletter, Thursday, April 27th and Friday, April 28th

GILES: Uh, when I've examined it, you can, uh, uh, skim it. JENNY: Scan it, Rupert. That's scan it. GILES: (gives her a look) Of course. JENNY: Oh, I know, our ways are strange to you, but soon you will join us in the 20th century. With three whole years to spare! GILES: Ms. Calendar, I'm sure your computer science class is fascinating, but I happen to believe that one can survive in modern society without being a slave to the, um, idiot box. JENNY: That's TV. The idiot box is TV. This (indicates a computer) is the good box!

~~I Robot You Jane~~

The Sunnydale Herald is looking for at least one new editor. Contributing to the Herald is a great way to get your Buffy on! Find out more here.

[Drabbles & Short Fiction]

First Time for Everything by Gabriel_Is_My_Guardian_Angel89 (Angel/Spike, E)

How to Make Friends with Gods by pprfaith (Loki/Buffy, MCU xover, G)

internal conflict by The_Eclectic_Bookworm (Jenny/Giles, T)

tongues and teeth by The_Eclectic_Bookworm (Jenny/Giles, T)

Moral Waiver by flootzavut (Buffy/Spike, G)

[Chaptered Fiction]

Marry Me on Monday - Ch. 1 by Jess_Ann_Perreault (Jenny/Giles, G)

A Coalition of Heroes - Ch. 21 by Aragorn_II_Elessar (ensemble, multi crossover, T) COMPLETE!

Commit No Errors - Ch. 4 by duh_i_write (Drusilla/Spike, Spike/Andrew, M) COMPLETE!

ever waiting airports (full of the love that you deserve) - Ch. 13 by womanaction (Buffy/Spike, E) COMPLETE!

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Exquisite Complications: Part 1 by yellowb, Kanita, JayeMaru, incendie, SzmattyCat, MillennialCryBaby, BewitchedXx, ClowniestLivEver (Buffy/Spike, unrated)

Tortie the Huntress - Ch. 1-4 by Desicat (Buffy/Spike, G)

Between the Shadow and the Soul - Ch. 1 by Lmrln (Buffy/Spike, NC-17)

The Neighbor's Point of View - Ch. 4 by the_big_bad (Buffy/Spike, PG)

So One of Us is Living - Ch. 16-17 by violettathepiratequeen (Buffy/Spike, PG-13)

A Slayer's Fortune - Ch. 3 by VoronaFiernan (Buffy/Spike, R)

Cinder-Buffy - Ch. 1 by holetoledo (Buffy/Spike, NC-17)

42 - Ch. 27 by Dynamite (Buffy/Spike, NC-17)

Mostly Harmless - Ch. 27 by Lady Emma (Buffy/Spike, NC-17)

From Hell with Love - Ch. 6 by temporarytitle (Buffy/Spike, R)

ever waiting airports (full of the love that you deserve) - Ch. 13 by MixSaysRawr (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) COMPLETE!

Bring Him Home - Ch. 17 by acb6293 (Buffy/Spike, R)

Rewind Love - Ch. 7 by Blade Redwind (Buffy/Spike, NC-17)

You're the One - Ch. 18 by BloodyThorn (Buffy/Spike, NC-17)

ever waiting airports (full of the love that you deserve) - Ch. 13 by womanaction (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) COMPLETE!

The Joker and the Queen - Ch. 1 by TheSunnySlayer (Buffy/Spike, PG-13)

Boulevard of Broken Dreams - Ch. 2 by VeroNyxK84 (Buffy/Spike, R)

Dawn the Vampire Slayer - Ch. 5 by LJ94 (Buffy/Spike, R)

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Bring Him Home - Ch. 12 by Acb6293 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17)

[Images, Audio & Video]

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Icons: 10 Season 4 BtVS Icons by debris4spike (various, worksafe)

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[Fandom Discussions]

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The Gentlemen are queer-coded -- "Hush" by various

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[including Seasons 8-12 comics] Buffy/Spike are endgame in the Buffyverse. by beeemkcl

the English accents in buffy are so ridiculous 😅 spikes is kind of passable but jeez 😂 by ThThestickleman

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[weclassybouquetfun]

The premiere of THE SUICIDE SQUAD redux is currently underway and it’s a no brainer that the skwad will assemble, but they may have a new hero in their midst.  The Wrap reported that COBRA KAI’s Xolo Maridueña is in talks to play Blue Beetle Jaime Reyes in the HBO Max film. 

And while nothing is confirmed, Xolo just happens to be at the premiere with BLUE BEETLE director  Angel Manuel Soto. 

If true, Xolo will be the second actor to play the live-action Jaime, the first being  Jaren Brandt Bartlett who appeared in the final season of SMALLVILLE.

SMALLVILLE did it first, as usual.

appearing with the first, and so far only, live-action Booster Gold Eric Martsolf. 

Also at the premiere is Leslie Grace who will be the Batgirl for HBO Max’s film. 

- To commemorate the release of THE SUICIDE SQUAD, Millenial Loteria company is releasing branded Loteria cards featuring the very likely ill-fated skwad.

They’re going to need all the help they can against Starro.

So where are we at: BLACK ADAM and THE BATMAN are wrapped

, THE FLASH and SHAZAM: FURY OF THE GODS are still filming

in ten days will see the return of TITANS for its third season

and in eight days STARGIRL flies to her new home on the CW.

- While doing press for season two of STARGIRL Luke Wilson, who plays the boyfriend of titular Stargirl’s mother, talked about how he and brother Owen were lived together in Atlanta while Owen filmed LOKI and Luke STARGIRL. And while Owen loved the show, he confessed to not really understanding it despite Owen explaining it to him.

[oftomorrow]

you mention smallville a few times on your blog, do you like it? how much of your clark is smallville based?

Smallville is trash. But it’s my trash.

In all seriousness, I do enjoy Smallville. I have a lot of childhood memories attached to it, and I will always adore it despite its faults. Its main fault being that it ran for way too long. I maintain that the first three seasons are the show at its best -- a coming of age teen drama about a weird kid in a weird town, following a monster-of-the-week format with some very light serialization. After that, the show lost a lot of its appeal. Season four had a bewilderingly terrible serialized arc that went nowhere, though season five recovered somewhat and is mostly solid.

Season six was the point of no return for me. They insisted on milking the show well after its basic premise had expired. The newer plotlines meant to transition Clark into adulthood and becoming Superman rarely worked for me, and most of the characters wound up ruined at some point -- Clark himself becomes a tad insufferable after a while. And of course, the fact that it took eight fucking seasons for Clark and Lana’s relationship to finally run its course.

We can’t forget about that finale, either. Ten years of build-up to Clark becoming Superman, and they won’t even show him in the suit properly. Not to mention Clark’s appearance in Crisis revealing that he gave up all his powers only a few years later. It makes the entire show feel pointless in retrospect -- we don’t get to see him be Superman, and we find out he wasn’t even Superman for all that long.

As for how much of my Clark is Smallville based... I pull some backstory ideas from the earlier seasons, and a lot of the general vibes. Clark’s arrival in Smallville brought a meteor shower with it. Kryptonite from the meteor shower occasionally causes some weird shit to happen around town. Clark’s childhood best friends are Lana, Pete, and Chloe. Clark learned about how the Kents found him when he was struck by a car going off a bridge and walked away without a scratch (though I made this an unnamed drunk driver instead of Lex). And Schneider and O’Toole will always be how I picture the Kents.

[thelastspeecher]

Smallville AU Setup

All right, so, once again, I am back on my bullshit and thinking about Smallville.  Which means I am thinking about my very half-baked Smallville AU, where Stan and Ford take the role of Clark Kent.  But I’m determined to finish baking this AU, so I thought on it a bit more, and I’ve come up with the bare bones of how the AU starts.

The spaceship that Stan and Ford are in crashes on Earth, while husband and wife Filbrick and Caryn Pines are traveling from a pawnshop convention.  Filbrick and Caryn stumble across this spaceship and the two children inside.  Caryn suggests they take the boys in.  Filbrick is a bit uncertain, but goes along with it.  They take the boys and spaceship and head home to Glass Shard Beach, New Jersey.

Eventually, Filbrick gets sick of the boys and their superpowers, and tells Caryn they need to tell the government about the alien boys they’ve been raising.  Caryn, who has been getting upset with Filbrick’s treatment of the boys, decides “fuck it” and flees.  She takes the kids, takes the spaceship, and goes to the original place where the spaceship crashed: Smallville, Kansas.  She also changes their last name to Kent, to hide from Filbrick.  Stan and Ford are about eight when this happens.

To pay for the bills and whatnot, Caryn works at and then takes over the local coffee shop, the Talon.  She encourages her boys to befriend the locals, and they do.  Namely, they befriend two brothers named Lute and Fiddleford McGucket, whose family owns a farm.  Stan and Ford regularly help out with chores and, when they become teens, even get hired during the summer as farmhands.

Caryn keeps quiet about where her sons came from, even keeping Stan and Ford in the dark.  When they develop superstrength and superspeed, she lies about why they have those traits.  She just wants her boys to have a normal childhood.

But that all comes crashing down during a literal crash.  Stan and Ford are walking home when someone drives his car off a bridge, crashing into Ford on the way.  Stan jumps into the river after his brother and the car, and he and Ford rescue the car’s driver, who they discover to be local rich person Bill Cipher, who recently inherited a multimillion corporation.  Bill is convinced that he hit Ford, but Stan and Ford both deny it.  This begins Bill’s obsession with Ford.

When Stan and Ford get home, they confront Caryn about why they also apparently cannot be physically harmed.  Superstrength and superspeed could be explained away, but even Caryn can’t lie this problem away.  She is forced to come clean.  Stan and Ford have their world completely turned upside down.

(Side note: Stan wonders whether he or Ford is the abnormal one.  After all, they’ve never met another one of their species.  Maybe their species is supposed to have twelve fingers, and Stan’s weird for only having ten.)

Bill tries to ply Stan and Ford with gifts.  Stan is fairly suspicious, but Ford isn’t.  Both Stan and Ford have been struggling with the news that they’re aliens, but Ford is feeling that struggle more.  Stan fits in well at school, he’s not a genius with twelve fingers.  Ford’s always stuck out, and now he’s found another way that he is different from everyone else.  So, he’s lured by Bill’s seemingly benign kindness and assurances that he is unique and special in a good way, rather than in a bad way.

And...that’s about what I’ve got right now.  I’ll eventually make another post with some more details about how I match this AU to things that happen in various seasons, but this is basically everything prior to and including the pilot episode.

[unknownunseenunheard]

Hey, do you know how we can make Smallville ten times sader? :)

Clark meets adult Bart in the later seasons, and Bart becomes a reoccurring character in the show, and even a founding member of the Justice League. Other Flashes arent shown directly, but its implied theyre dead (other than Jay, who is retired, but he only shows up in the comic continuation)

Then, Bart dies (:

Clark tries to save him, but he cant. Hes not strong enough. Bart is ripped away, and he cant stop it

Clark thinks this is the last he’ll see of Bart

Until he spots Kon laughing and bonding with a crazy teen from the future that looks exceedingly familiar, and Clark feels dread because he knows exactly how Bart’s story will end

****

Clark, knowing exactly how and when Bart is gonna die: Should I tell them?

Lois: I think theyre dating now

Clark:

Clark: They’re fucking what now?

Lois: Yes. Exactly. Fucking

Clark: !!!!!

****

Kon: Hey, Clark, this is my boyfriend, Bart :D

Clark, knowing exactly what will happen to Bart in a few years: fear

Also Clark, addicted to secrets: says nothing

[spnfanficpond]

Pond Diving - Katelynw93

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“Don’t Be Koi About It” - All About You

Name: Katelyn, but most people call me Kate, Katie or sometimes even Kat.

Age: 27

Location: Originally from Kansas, but have been located in Upstate NY for the last six years.

URL: @katelynw93​

Why did you choose your URL: It’s usually the username that I use for everything and if I’m being honest, I’m not very creative when it comes to titles or names. Lol. I’ve been meaning to change it; I just need to decide on what.  

What inspired you to become a writer: Well, when I was in middle school (maybe seventh or eighth grade), my best friend and I decided to write a story together and post it on a fanfiction site (Can’t remember the site name, though.) And I just loved it. We never did finish that story. Lol. But eventually I started branching out and found some roleplay writing sites.  

How long have you been writing: Started writing in middle school (2006/2007), but really got into it in 2009 with RP. However, September of this year (2020) was the first year I started really writing fics by myself and opening posting them. 

What do you do when you are not writing i.e. Job/Hobbies etc? I work a lot, usually an average of 40+ hours a week; I am a manager at a popular food chain restaurant and on the weekends, a cashier at a gas station to provide a little extra cash for my family. When I’m not working, my time is spent with my two kids; Alekzander (Zander) who just turned five this past November and Lincoln (Link) who will be two in February. Outside of work and my family, I’m usually writing. Sometimes if I’m feeling extra creative or inspired, I’ll create a few crackships for couples I really enjoy. Lol. 

How long have you been in the SPN Fandom? I actually found Supernatural around the same time I started writing, so back in ninth grade, so 2008/2009. It was honestly an accident too, because I was searching for Smallville episodes (I have an unhealthy addiction to Superman and DC/Marvel.) and stumbled upon an ad for Supernatural. Was instantly intrigued and fell in love. Seasons 1 - 5 (the Kripke era) are my favorite. 

Are you in any other fandoms and do you write for them? Oh yea, I love TV shows and movies, and as I’ve already stated above, I love DC and Marvel. I’ve also written for Grey’s Anatomy and am willing to write for more, but SPN, DC and Grey’s are currently the only ones I’ve written for. I love The Vampire Diaries, One Tree Hill, Private Practice, Station 19, 9-1-1, Game of Thrones, The Witcher, Merlin, Dexter, Psych, and so, so many more. There are too many to list. Lol.  

Do you do any writing outside of fanfiction? If so, tell us about it? Other than RPing, not really. I mean, I did try to do an original story with my friend when I was younger, but it never went anywhere. But I am willing to try someday. 

Favorite published author: Other than the really big authors like; J.K. Rowling, George R.R. Martin, Jim Butcher, Nicholas Sparks, Suszanne Collins, I really like (and maybe it’s cliche) Stephenie Meyer. The Twilight Saga made me fall in love with reading and eventually, that love led me to writing. Those books hold a special place in my heart.  

Have you ever read a book that made an impact on your life? Which one and why?: Well, I guess I sort of answered that one already. But there truly are so many amazing books out there and still so many more to discover. 

Favorite genre of fanfic (smut, angst, fluff, crack, rpf, etc): Oh man, I’m not gonna lie, a majority of what I read is probably smut. But I am particularly fond of angst. I want you to make me cry. Really dig and stab into my emotions. Lol. And then come back in with some fluff. Haha. 

Favorite piece of your own writing: Well, that would have to be Sweet Cherry Pie because it was really the first piece I’ve ever finished and published online. It was inspired by an RP that I am currently involved in and they are my favorite couple in said RP. It got so much positive feedback after I shared it that it inspired me to keep writing. I was so nervous about posting it, but I am glad I did. 

Most underrated fic you have written: Oh I’m not sure. Maybe Love Bites. I am a sucker for Supernatural and The Vampire Diaries crossovers. I really loved writing this fic and am eager to write more. 

Story of yours that you’d most like to see turned into a movie/tv show: Oh damn, um, it’d be cool to see any of them like that. But maybe Sweet Cherry Pie or Out of the Fire (my firefighter!Dean series).  

Favorite Tumblr Writer(s): There are so many, but I usually find myself reading work from; @impala-dreamer​, @katehuntington​  @deanwanddamons​, @muchamusedaboutnothing​.  

Favorite Fic from another writer: This one is tough because there are so many amazing fics out there, especially ones that I adddddore; but if forced to choose, one story that will always stick with me would have to be Treacherous by @idkhaylijah​ OR The Sullivan Series by Kate Huntington 

Favorite character to write: Dean Winchester. I adore Dean and he’s probably the easiest for me to write. I have written the most fics with him and I portray him often in the RPs that I do. 

Favorite Pairing to write: Dean with anyone, but my favorite would be Dean x Caroline. 

Least favorite character to write (and why): That’s a tough one, cause there’s not really any that I’m uncomfortable with or dislike writing. Maybe characters with accents, because I don’t really know how to capture that in writing yet? I’m pretty open with my writing and am willing to try mostly anything. 

Do you have anyone you consider a mentor? Oh definitely. When I first started RPing, there was another girl (Jocelyn) that I used to write with and she influenced a lot of my writing. She was older than me and had more experience and gave me a lot of tips on how to get better. She is an amazing writer and had the potential of going far with it, but life happens and unfortunately, she doesn’t write anymore. But she is booming on Youtube, so that’s pretty impressive. It’s pretty cool to see how far she’s come. 

Do you have any aspirations involving your writing? I used to want to be a journalist when I was younger, but other than that, not really. I just want to have fun with it and write something meaningful for someone, and always improve and get better.  

How many work-in-progress stories do you have: I have a few ideas jotted down, maybe ten, but I haven’t actually started any of them. I have so many bingo cards I need to finish, but with my work schedule, it’s been pretty crazy. 

What are you currently working on? My main project is Out of the Fire.

“Pond Diving” - All About The Writing

What/who has had the biggest influence on your writing? Definitely the RPing that I’ve done and am currently doing. My friend Alesha has been the longest RP partner that I’ve had and her writing is phenomenal - and it helps a lot too when your mind's work in similar ways; her and I always seem to be on the same wavelength when it comes to writing. I love it. But like me, she has a very busy schedule and writing is limited. 

Best writing advice you've been given: Have fun with it, write what you want to write and always be open to helpful criticism. And don’t stress about it, either. Write in your own time. It’s meant to be fun, not stressful. 

Biggest obstacle you’ve faced in your writing: Just finding the time to write and getting over being so self conscious about my writing. I don’t let anyone in my real life read what I write.  

What aspects of writing do you find difficult when you write fanfiction? Just capturing the personalities of the canon characters sometimes; if it’s a character I’m not used to writing, I worry about portraying them the right way. And I have trouble individualizing the characters (separating them from myself/my own personality), like when I create an OC for an RP, sometimes when I have too many, their personalities all become the same in ways (if that makes sense?). And accents. I have trouble with accents. Oh, and fight/action scenes. They take me a bit.  

Is there anything you want to write but are afraid to (and why): I am always going to be afraid, no matter what it is that I’m writing, because I worry about it succeeding. I want to write for other fandoms though, I guess, but like I said, I worry about capturing the characters right and having a decent storyline that is unique. 

What inspires/motivates you to write: Honestly, positive feedback. I love hearing what people think about my writing and it motivates me to continue. 

How do you deal with self-doubt: That’s a tough one. I guess I just look towards my writing friends or beta’s for reassurance or I go back and read the positive comments and likes on the fics I’ve already shared. It encourages me to continue. 

How do you deal with writer's block: I usually listen to music and I’ll look up gifs of my favorite characters, create stories in my head with those gifs or I’ll create gif sets of specific scenes. If that doesn’t work, I’ll take a break and watch one of my favorite TV shows for inspiration. 

Do you plan/outline your story before you start: For my RPs, I have a group chat with those I’m writing with and we usually shoot ideas back and forth, but mostly we wing it. For my fics, I normally just wing it, but with Out of the Fire, I have a rough idea of what I want from each part. With that said, my ideas or plans often change as I’m writing. These characters have a mind of their own sometimes. Lol.  

Do you have any weird writing habits: I don’t know about any weird habits, but I always have music on and I guess I have to do it in spurts. I’ll write a few paragraphs or sentences, pause and scroll tumblr or facebook or gifs, and then go back, reread what I wrote and then write a few more. Rise and repeat. 

Have you ever received hateful comments on your fic and how do you deal with it? So far, no I haven’t, and I hope I don’t ever have to deal with that. But I know it’s bound to happen. I guess if I were to ever encounter that, I’d like to say that I’ll take it as a learning experience but I honestly don’t know I’d feel about that.  

Conversely: what’s been some of your favorite feedback on your fanfic? Oh man, I guess my favorite would have to be ellewritesfix05 reaction to the secret santa fic I wrote for her; Dean Fucking Winchester. And all the positive feedback I’ve gotten for Out of the Fire.

If you could give one piece of advice to a new and/or struggling writer, what would it be? Have fun with it. Write what you want and what you’re comfortable with. Don’t be afraid of constructive criticism and most importantly, don’t stress. Writing is fun.

[agirlwithachakram]

i don’t wanna say jensen ackles didn’t have a hand in digging his own grave, because he did (the “don’t ruin it for everyone” thing was pretty rough), and I don’t have any particular investment in defending him, BUT i do think his position has been absolutely surreal for the last ten years and I don’t think he’s like, as homophobic as all the jokes make him out to be.

like, people have harassed him and his wife about fandom shipping stuff! in very creepy and bad ways! you can understand why his hackles (his ackles hackles) would be raised.

i hope to god he doesn’t know that a/b/o originated with a jensen/jared kink meme or something like that

I can’t think of another fandom that has ever really looked like and acted like the SPN one. he had a couple runs on dawson’s creek and smallville and then suddenly he was the lead in the most rabid fandom i’ve ever seen. marvel is bigger, but marvel is much more divided and controlled and it’s a massive disney project that puts out two movies a year. supernatural is a CW show with 20+ episodes a year with fifteen seasons and even ten years after the non-incestuous shipping possibility was first introduced the top ship has 23k more fanfic on AO3 than the next one down, which is johnlock.

how do you, especially you, a straight man who is invested in keeping bad vibes/threats(!!) away from his wife and kids, deal with the personalized popularity of being Dean Winchester? it is not like being tom hanks or, or matthew mcconaughey or whatever. people write fic about you and your co-stars, not the characters, but literally you, and worse, weird theories about how you’re actually banging your (also married) co-star and insist it’s true and every affectionate action between you and him will be giffed and archived as proof by a minority, but a weirdly vocal minority. there’s even a cutesy (barf) ship name that sounds like seashells!

it’s not surprising to me that he has made some yucky missteps at cons. I don’t think some of the things he’s said are okay. i don’t. but. people aren’t perfect and they do weird things under stress and misdirect their ire. and apparently, he was part of the planning for that love confession scene and worked it out with the others that cas would set a bloody handprint on him as a callback (c’mon that shit’s romantic and we all know it) to cas’s intro.

and I really didn’t think he was playing dean as homophobic or even necessarily uninterested, i dunno. i think it’s just fun to meme that, but i don’t agree that it actually happened in the show itself.

[jadelotusflower]

This is from a Smallville fic I've been working on for a while now, but it's as yet unposted, as this time I want to try completing a longfic before publishing to avoid the long wait between chapters that I am notorious for.

Canon-compliant, set mid-season 10 (after Ambush):

____________________________________________________________

There was a sharp rapping at the front door and Lois gave a huff of exasperation as she went to answer it, ready to dispose of whatever salesperson, preacher, or townie had the gall to disrupt the perfect morning she’d been planning. She opened the door with more force than necessary, ready to launch into a tirade about acceptable visiting hours, but her mouth dropped open in shock - for once, no sound emerged - as she recognised the figure standing on the porch.

It was Lana Lang.

She looked much the same as when Lois had last seen her; irrepressibly beautiful, dark hair falling in soft waves over her shoulders, although longer than it had been at Chloe’s wedding. Impeccably dressed in a dark purple coat, slim cut jeans and boots Lois immediately coveted, she seemed almost otherworldly cut against the stormy Kansas sky.

“Lana?” she asked, just in case she was hallucinating.

“Oh, Lois.” Lana’s look of surprise quickly faded into a bright smile. “Hi.”

“Hi,” Lois parroted, incapable of forming articulate thoughts, let alone words.

“I should have expected you to be staying here - I saw the Talon when I drove through town, or what’s left of it.” Lana walked almost tentatively into the house and then turned around to face her again. “What happened?”

“Um, there was an explosion.” Lois shut the door, reminding herself that Lana had once lived at the farm too, so of course she wouldn’t need an invitation. “I got out in time.”

“Oh my god,” Lana’s expression shifted to one of concern, and she put a hand on Lois’s arm. “You were there? Are you okay?”

“Yeah,” Lois gestured to herself. “Not even singed.”

“I’m so glad,” Lana embraced her tightly. “It’s so good to see you.”

“It’s been a long time,” Lois said, returning the hug somewhat gingerly, still thrown by Lana’s sudden appearance and hating the sudden wave of insecurity it had caused.

“Is Clark home?”

Lois pulled away, unsure of how to handle the situation. But the General always said, don’t lie, just don’t give more information than you need to.

“He’s uh...still asleep.”

Lana gave an indulgent smile, and no indication she was aware that Lois would intimately know Clark’s state of wakefulness because she had been sharing the bed with him not ten minutes before.

“I was just making coffee, if you’d like some.” Lois moved into the kitchen, wringing her hands.

“That would be great.” Lana took off her coat and hung it on the rack by the door with the others. Lois breathed a sigh of relief that Clark’s monogrammed jacket wasn’t among them, before realising that of course Lana knew his secret. She’d known for years, been trusted and loved and cherished while Lois had still been teasing him about being the least interesting guy she knew. Had they laughed together about self-absorbed, oblivious Lois, who couldn’t see what’s right in front of her face?

“How are you, Lois?” Lana perched herself on a stool at the kitchen island.

“Oh you know,” she said, withdrawing a mug from the cupboard. Further errant and unwilling thoughts flashed through her mind - had Lana used that mug when she’d lived at the farm? Was it her favourite? Had she and Clark shared sly kisses over morning coffee as he had with Lois?

Get a grip, Lane, she scolded herself, placing the mug down on the counter and retrieving the coffee pot - Lana liked it black, she recalled.

“Almost seems like old times,” Lana smiled again as Lois poured coffee into the mug. “How many cups of coffee and conversations did we share after closing at the Talon?”

That had been back in the early days, when Lois had been a barista and Lana had still lived in the apartment above. She’d been more than happy to listen to high school and town gossip, and offer advice on her somewhat rocky relationships with Jason Teague, and later, Clark and Lex. But by that time Lana had vacated the Talon, and Lois had moved in - much as she had with Clark, she thought with grim irony.

“I remember we had a bottle of whiskey stashed away to make the coffees Irish,” Lois said, latching back onto something resembling her characteristic quippiness (or deflection, as Clark would say). “Sadly I can’t offer you the same now, Lady Temperance up there doesn’t keep liquor in the house.”

She regretted the joke as soon as she’d made it. Despite it not being true, it felt too much like an old barb designed to needle Clark, and without him in the room to counter with his own riposte it almost felt mean spirited. What was she trying to do, make Lana think they were still nothing but quarrelling roommates?

But Lana only gave another indulgent smile. “I miss those times,” she said, wrapping both hands around the mug as she took a sip. “When everyone else was pressuring me, and judging me, you were always there to just listen. I appreciated that so much Lois, and I’m sorry we drifted apart.”

Lois was touched by the admission - despite the aimlessness of those years, she looked back on them fondly and enjoyed her role as dispenser of coffee with a side of advice.

“Well I was busy at the Planet, and you…” Lois bit her tongue; she didn’t want to bring up Lex. “You had your own life.”

Lana gave a light laugh. “That’s one way of putting it.”

Lois located the box full of pastries Clark had brought home with him the previous night from her favourite bakery in Metropolis, and that had been quickly forgotten once she beckoned him up to the bedroom. She opened the box and presented it to Lana, who took a croissant.

“I’m sorry we didn’t get a chance to catch up at Chloe’s wedding,” Lana added as Lois took a maple danish from the box, and put it down open on the counter.

“Well, a literal monster gatecrashing did put a damper on the mingling.”

“The next I heard you were in Star City.”

“Well with Chloe…” Lois cleared her throat. “Someone had to be there for Jimmy.”

“I heard what happened to him.” Lana said, looking down and lightly tearing apart the croissant. “I’m so sorry, I know you two were close.”

Lois took a large bite of her danish so she didn’t have to answer, that unresolved hurt welling up in her gut. Reservations about him marrying her cousin aside, Jimmy had been a good friend, and she’d spent hours by his bedside in Star City trying to distract him from the pain and worrying over Chloe. But by the time she’d returned from her jaunt to the future he’d been dead for a month, and no one wanted to talk about him, their grief already packed tightly away.

It had almost made it seem unreal, like at any moment he would turn up with his camera ready and a hair-brained scheme for a story. At work she often found herself almost calling out for him before catching herself, frustrated when she needed to chase down one of the other staff photographers whose names she couldn’t bring herself to learn.

As perfect a partner Clark was, it still felt as if part of their team was missing. Jimmy had, after all, tried to set them up more than once, and had never stopped dropping hints about how perfect Lois and Clark could be - he’d seen what both of them weren’t willing to admit, even to themselves. It would have made him so happy to see them together, but he never would, she would never again see his name underneath a photograph on the front page, would never...

“The Daily Planet hasn’t been the same without him.” Lois busied herself with taking a sip of coffee and pushed the pain back down. “So are you back for good?”

“I don’t know,” Lana said, and Lois felt a creeping dread form in her gut. “There’s a few loose ends to tie up.”

Lois had never really known what had happened between Clark and Lana while she was off in Star City - Chloe had been cagey about it and Lois wasn’t about to grill her cousin over something so inconsequential when her marriage was falling apart. She’d assumed there’d been closure of some sort - Clark hadn’t reverted to his mopey state like the first time Lana had left, but Lois couldn’t completely quash that niggling voice of doubt now personified in the petite brunette sitting before her.

“Well I’m sure Clark will be happy to see you.”

Lois scolded herself for being ridiculous - even if (as she suspected) they’d briefly reunited during Lana’s last visit, they’d broken up again and there was no reason to assume she’d come back for a third (or was it forth or fifth?) try. Of course, Lois knew she should just come out and tell Lana that she and Clark were together, but didn’t know how to say it without sounding proprietary. Anyone else and she would not hesitate to stake her claim, but she’d always considered Lana a friend and didn’t want to go full blown Lois on her. But she didn’t miss the wistful, longing look on Lana’s face - an expression she’d seen so many times before over those coffees at the Talon.

“You’re a few weeks late for the Smallville High reunion,” Lois said, trying to pivot to a safer subject. With success, because Lana’s face broke into a smile and she laughed.

“You went to that?” Lana tilted her head. “Well, I suppose technically you were a student.”

“Right?” Lois grinned. “That’s what I kept telling everyone.”

“How was it?”

“Much as you’d expect - Clark was crowned Homecoming King.”

Lana gave a pearly laugh. “I bet he loved that.”

“I’ll send you a picture,” Lois promised. “It was priceless.”

Lana’s expression faded from amusement to something wistful. “You know when I was younger all I wanted to do was leave Smallville - see the world outside.”

She got up from the stool, looking into the living room as if reacquainting herself with it, and Lois tried very hard not to think about just what memories Lana could be recalling about Clark, the couch, and the rug in front of the fireplace.

“Now I’ve been everywhere I’ve ever dreamed of,” she continued. “Seen - and done - so many amazing things. But I never expected that I would miss this town so much.”

Lois had a sneaking suspicion that it wasn’t the town that she’d missed, but bit down on her lower lip to stop herself from saying so. Instead she watched as Lana wandered, lightly touching the knick knacks that no doubt held meaning Lois knew nothing about.

She picked up a framed photograph of Clark with his parents and smiled. Lois was relieved - the next photo on the sideboard was the one of her and Clark in front of the Metro Theatre, which would make everything clear. However before she could get to it, a creak sounded from the floorboards above to signal someone moving down the hallway.

“Lo-is,” Clark called from upstairs, teasing out her name in a beckoning, playful tone. Lois bit her lip and looked at Lana, who raised her eyebrows in surprise and put the frame back down.

Lois heard his heavy footsteps down the stairs and he appeared on the landing in pajama pants and a t-shirt, with tousled hair and a suggestive grin. She realised he couldn’t see their guest, but before she could open her mouth to warn him he bounded down the remaining stairs and swept her into an embrace from the side, arms clamping around her waist and nose brushing aside her hair so he could kiss the juncture between her neck and shoulder.

“Come back to bed,” he murmured, nuzzling her neck. “It’s lonely up there,”

“Clark,” Lois patted his arm around her waist, cringing at Lana’s wide-eyed reaction. “We have company.”

Clark finally looked up and she felt him tense. “Lana,” he said in surprise, releasing Lois abruptly and taking a step back. “What - what are you doing here?”

“Interrupting something, apparently,” she said with a nervous laugh, and Lois re-tied the belt of her silk robe that Clark had somehow been able to get undone in microseconds. Then she turned, trying to gauge his reaction - he was clearly embarrassed, running a hand through his hair and shuffling further back until his rear hit the kitchen sink.

“It’s alright Clark,” Lana said, holding up her palms as she walked back to the kitchen. “You don’t have to stay away - I’m Kryptonite free.”

Clark’s shoulders relaxed slightly but he stayed where he was, brow creasing in consternation. “Really? How - when?”

“It’s a long story.” Lana clasped her hands together and looked uneasy. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have barged in on you like this.”

“You’re always welcome,” Clark said, his discomfort easing into a smile as he slowly inched forward to stand beside Lois. “How have you been?”

“That’s a long story too,” Lana smiled ruefully. “I’ve been travelling, mostly. But wherever I was, I made sure to get a copy of the Daily Planet so I could follow the continued exploits of Metropolis’ Blur.”

She shot Clark a questioning glance, as if unsure of how much she should say, but he looked at Lois and smiled.

“It’s alright,” Clark put a warm hand on the small of her back. “Lois knows everything.”

“Not quite everything I guess,” Lois cut in, trying not to sound accusatory but failing utterly. “Circle back to why Clark would think you’d be packing Kryptonite?”

Clark flushed and swallowed heavily. “Uh-”

“A parting gift from Lex,” Lana said bitterly, sliding onto the stool again. “I’d discovered his plans to give himself Clark’s powers by grafting a power suit under his skin.” She held out one arm, and Lois could see faint scars running all the way down her forearm. “But I got there first.”

“So you…” Lois could feel her chest getting tight. “You have superpowers.”

“The suit wasn’t vulnerable to kryptonite,” Lana continued, “it absorbed it. Long story short, I was forced to take on too much and the suit couldn’t process it. The kryptonite remained active.”

“Active as in…”

“It’s like I was a walking, talking meteor rock,” Lana grimaced.

“So if you got too close to Clark, you’d kill him.” Lois felt her chest get even tighter, almost as if her throat would close over. “That’s why you left.”

Lana looked uneasy, and cast her gaze down. But Clark, ever attuned to Lois’s mood, gave her a concerned look as his hand rubbed small circles against her back.

“Are you okay Lois?” he asked. “I’ve thrown so much information at you these past few weeks, it’s a lot to take in.”

Well maybe not so well tuned, she conceded, if he thought information overload was the cause of her distress. For a smart guy, Clark really could be absolutely clueless.

“I’m fine,” Lois cleared her throat and gave him a smile. “Kryptonite is just the gift that keeps on giving isn’t it?”

“Well not to me,” Lana spoke up, hugging her arms around herself. “The kryptonite is gone, but so are my powers.”

And there it was. Lois looked at Clark again, but he still seemed painfully oblivious to the glaringly obvious. His attention was on Lana, expression a mixture of concern and perhaps...relief?

“Well I should let you two catch up.” Lois picked up her phone from the counter. “I have to head into the office anyway, Randall’s sent me a big story and I need to get on it asap.”

Technically not a lie, but not the truth either, so she made for the stairs before Clark could see the deception on her face.

“But it’s the weekend,” he protested, catching her hand and giving her a look that pleaded for her to stay.

“The news doesn’t take a day off, Smallville.” She pulled her hand away and backed up towards the stairs. “You know that.”

She turned back to Lana and gave what she hoped was a convincing smile. “It was good to see you Lana, we should catch up properly...if, you know, you’re around for a while.”

“Irish coffee’s on me,” Lana promised.

[evilwickedme]

You know Smallville!Clois is up there with spuffy for ships I've thought about nonstop since I was a preteen but I simply never wrote anything for because there was nothing to say. Like I adore spuffy and they're so deeply in love - what do I have to say about them that the show didn't already? But then Crisis happened on the CW and their appearance there made me so angry I started thinking maybe I'll write a little fic where they're in love and together post s10 but you know Clark is still superman cause he learned multiple times that he shouldn't give up his powers and that was fucking stupid, and then I did this rewatch and planned out the fix it fic for s8... And yeah ok both of those are happening. They just are I can see no other way forward. Esp the fix it fic. I'm not even going to have them get together at the end of the fix it fic I'm genuinely just going to go around canon and then bring it back. If you read my post on why I hate that one arc in season eight with Lana you know. Anyway yeah I'm about a third of the way done with season ten and I can't wait to finally write my lecture and then write these fics

[jupitermelichios]

Smallville S3E1: Exile

So much happens in this episode and I am not emotionally invested in any of it. Not even Lex staring in the Castaway x Shutter Island crossover movie absolutely no one asked for.

Apparently ending S2 of a teen genre show with your main character peacing out after major trauma and then opening S3 three months later with your MC living undercover was just a thing. Although Buffy at least had it be her own trauma she was running from not a weird guilt complex thing where she has to make other people’s trauma all about her like Clark apparently has!

So Clark is living in Metropolis, dosed up on Red Kryptonite under the name Kal… and fucking robbing banks for a living! His solution to being sad is to just fucking take loads of magic space PCP and rob banks. You know, like a normal well adjusted person.

Lex aparently didn’t save himself from that plane crash, and is now legally dead. Given I know he’s in every season of this show, I’m really rooting for ‘living undercover as a hardboiled detective while he tries to uncover the truth’ for his s3 storyline

So as well as robbing banks for a living, Clark is also acting as a vigilante specifically stopping people robbing banks. Because even evil!Clark has to find ways to be a hyprocit.

You know a few years ago I’d have been like, why the fuck did the police just open fire on that unarmed man, and why did Clark just murder a load of cops, but it’s 2020 and I’m so tired and everyone involved in this scene is awful so fuck it, let them all kill each other

Holy shit I was right last episode, Clark has been gone for three months and everyone’s lives are better. Martha seems kind of sad and Lex is apparently dead, but everyone else is doing great!

Either they got a massive budget hike between seasons or they used their entire budget on this episode; we’ve had licenced music, CGI and Rutger Hauer all the in the first ten minutes

Apparently in the last three months the Kents have rebuilt their house and repurchased all their furniture. Like the exact same furniture. Like they couldn’t be bothered to get a new set so it’s literally the same kitchen

Okay so Lex just woke up on a deserted island with some other random guy and has apparently been living there for months and also has malaria but turns out malaria is nbd and just gives you occasional weird dreams and i’m pretty sure this is all just an excuse to have Michael Rosenbaum wander around set topless

So it’s Lex’s funeral, and I fucking adore how John Glover is playing Lionel’s speech. He looks so fucking bored. His words say it’s hard for a father to bury his son, but his face says “i’m missing Ellen for this”

Wait, cupboard sex doctor is here. What the fuck kind of explanation did she give anyone for how she escaped a plane crash?!

I think that’s three dramatic shirt rips so far and we’re only like ten minutes in

Holy shit the Kents also rebuilt the fucking barn. Why?! Why did they rebuild the exact same bloody barn?! Also apparently none of this was insured because they’re now going bust and moving into the empty apartment above the Talon. Apparently rebuilding an entire sound stage set is expensive, who knew!

Okay black widow angry cupboard sex doctor vs lionel luthor is the lionel family drama I’m here for. She should definitely marry Lex’s brother next and kill him off next, just as soon as the writers remember they gave Lex a brother

Exactly two people have worn sunglasses like that, Cyclops and apparently Clark Kent. Neither of them can pull them off

Apparently Lana’s solution to Clark going missing is to just fuck off to find him without telling anyone where she was going. Becuase two people going missing instead of one clearly improves the situation!

Wow, so the guy who’s on the same desert island as Lex is the son of a rich businessman who was emotionally abusive and who also has weird queer coding. Clearly they’re soulmates! The fact that the dude wants to murder Lex with a machete is maybe putting some kind of a crimp in the relationship but given Lex’s history I’m sure they can work through it.

Oh wow, there’s coincidence plots and then there’s Rutger Hauer hiring PCP!Clark to break into Lionel’s office to steal Kryptonite

Well then. Apparently Lex’s soulmate is a malaria hallucination, and now this random Jamaican dude is here to rescue him. Was Lex just on Jamaica this whole time? Oh my god, I really fucking hope he was just living next door to a resort full of tourists this whole fucking time, that would be so good, and honestly not even that weird compared to everything else that’s happened so far this episode

I love how every single version of Jor-El is just a complete prick. Do you think that’s a Kryptonian thing or just a him thing?

Oh no, apparently it’s not Kryptonite Clark’s stealing from the safe that was previously full of Kryptonite, it’s a maguffin so generic it’s literally just a featureless metal cube. I kind of love that they couldn’t be bothered to even get a fucking floppy disc or something, they just painted a cardboard box silver and called it a day

I realise Clark being on magical space PCP is real bad for the whole planet, but so far he mostly just seems to want to rob ATMs and pick up chicks, which isn’t great but is honestly probably less destructive than him being a good guy, so I’m really rooting for him to just fucking kill Jonathan in this confrontation and peace out. I mean I’m always rooting for absolutely anyone to kill Jonathan Kent at any given moment, but especially right now.

Wait, it’s just now occurred to me that the episode it over and we still don’t have any explanation for how angry cupboard sex doctor was supposed to have survived that plane crash. Because why would that be important information for the audience to have!