#in other news i got reminded of this kids heist movie the other day where they rob a bank
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dorizardthewizard · 8 months ago
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HSM (2006) rewatch pt 9
9: Who’s Michael Crawford?
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Guys I think Chad might not like women
Jokes aside, him complaining about Gabriella "casting a spell" on Troy and then reminding Troy he’s his most loyal best friend – like, why emphasise loyal? You scared someone’s taking your place hm 🤨? So far in this movie Chad has called two things frightening - theatre and all its unmanly implications, and the "female mind". Makes ya think.
Okokok I know it's just a "haha women amirite" jock moment but I find it more entertaining to interpret his actions as him having a crush on Troy that even he doesn't realise. That legendary requiem for Chad x Ryan video essay does it more justice it's hilarious
Also the spirit of my old eng lit teacher possessed me and needs you all to know that Chad calls Gabriella an "elevated IQ temptress" and earlier in the cafeteria he rags on Troy for auditioning for a "heinous" musical. This is rather dramatic language, which contrasts his jock bro personality. Moving on.
Chad carrying his basketball around everywhere is funny but it makes for good symbolism whenever he tries to give it to Troy and bring him over to the side of basketball, heteronormativity and conventional gender roles
Chad: So my point is, if you play basketball, you're gonna end up on the cereal box. Chad: If you sing in musicals, you're gonna end up in my mom's refrigerator Troy: Why would she put his picture in her refrigerator?
"You're gonna end up in my mom's refrigerator" is hilarious out of context. Respect to Chad’s mum even though I’ve never seen Phantom of the Opera, Troy is so baffled hahaha
Wait wouldn’t he know this already? I feel like with being childhood best friends he’d had seen the inside of their fridge by now, unless she recently put it in
But lowkey I understand how a teenage boy would be so put off by musicals after that, I used to be OBSESSED with Lion King like it was my personality from year 3 to 7, so my brother got sick of it and hated the movies so much. Fate paid a cruel trick on him when his class did a unit on The Lion King AND THEY EVEN WENT TO WATCH IT IN WEST END. I WAS SO JEALOUS AND HE WAS HAVING SUCH A SHIT TIME
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Chad if you really need Troy to be there THAT MUCH for you guys to focus on the game then maybe you’re not a great team or athletes? Honestly at this point Chad being annoyed that Troy is spending more time with someone else is starting to make more sense as a motivation
Also homeboy might want to focus on his studies a little, Troy's buckling down in the library but Chad's still carrying nothing but his basketball <3
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snickerdoodlles · 1 year ago
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any headcanons about the kp boys' favourite games? doesn't matter if it's board games, video games, card games, or mind games -- everything is fair game :')
Khun - internet quiz games like "which character are you" or "what cliche trope would you kiss" or whatever/etc etc. specifically, he likes taking them and then ranting about all the ways they're stupid and/or wrong.
Kim - claims its poker because he spent several years teaching himself how to count cards after he and Khun watched that one heist movie that involved counting cards. he liked Clue as a kid but then got extremely disappointed in it as he grew up. his university friends spend about four months trying to get him to download the among us game, then refuse to play with him after four days of him absolutely kicking ass at it. (new freshman hazing initiation ritual! Try To Beat Wik At Among Us! best played in a large group with a heckling peanut gallery.)
Chay - before Yok's bar, first person shooting games. or any type of shooting game really. less so afterwards.
Macau - ultimate videogame connoisseur. solid collection of board games for him and Vegas too (no scrabble though, he hates scrabble). his game room is a thing of legend. someone remind me to talk about the Macau&Chay you got mail AU that includes Chay calling Macau his sugar daddy after Macau gives him a bunch of turnips in Animal Crossing.
Vegas - he says mind games. his actual favorite game is pub trivia night. specifically in Pete's hometown where he and Pete's grandma team up against a bunch of other old people. have I mentioned I love a good relationship between Vegas & Pete's grandma.
Pete - he thought board games, because Khun's game rules are ridiculous but great at keeping things lively. he's extremely disappointed when Vegas and Macau don't like that at all. he is king of poker.
Porsche - card games! doesn't really have a specific favorite game and never plays for stakes, but one deck having multiple game options is a godsend when trying to entertain a kid on a budget. also damn good at card tricks, though he was careful not to show off those outside of home.
Kinn - Sudoku. he has an app folder of similar number games and spider solitaire on his phone. he is my favorite old man <3
Chay bonus - before BOC kinnporsche aired, one of my favorite Chay headcanons ever was pickpocket!Chay. so let's return to that and Chay breaks Kim's mind with card tricks. this is his new favorite game.
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aliensunflower-fics · 4 years ago
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‘Akumatized Marinette’ A funny prompt!
So ive seen a few different fics and posts where Lila convinces the class that Marinette is in fact Mayura and/or is working in some way for Hawkmoth, using such evidence as ‘Marinette’s never been akumatized’ and citing how sometimes Marinette’s attempts to be helpful or friendly or yes her mistakes have resulted in an akuma going after her classmates. Also other evidence like how many akumas the class has had total. But what if Lila could not convince class that Marinette was working with Hawkmoth, desperate to connect Marinette to the supervillain in hopes of plummeting her reputation Lila claims that Marinette is in fact AKUMATIZED hence her villainous actions towards Lila!
Now just follow me here:
What if the class don't believe Lila THAT MUCH. Sure Lila has them convinced that she’s a diplomats daughter and that shes got a million illnesses and physical problems and yes she even has everyone believing that she’s famous and that her and Adrien are a secret item [how scandalous!]. But no one in the class will for a SECOND believe that Marinette is working with Hawkmoth. Lila has tried broaching the subject several times, shes tried leaving ‘hints’ and pointing things out that seem ‘incriminating’ but each and every time she does the class scoff and each of them begin listing a 100 reasons why Marinette is definitely NOT a fan of Hawkmoth and would never work with him.
Frustrated but determined to connect the super villain to Marinette and alienate the girl further Lila seethes and plots. Getting more frustrated each failed attempt and trying to chew off her own sausage hair when people talk about how Marinette would definitely kick Hawkmoth’s ass. Then one day Marinette walks in with a totally new look, she’s cut her hair into a messy pixie cut and is going for a pink punk look. The look gets everyone's attention and the day is spent with everyone complimenting the baker girl [she even gets asked out by a few of the guys in the other classes] frustrated that everyone is paying attention to Marinette instead of herself Lila cant help but make up some big lie about how Marinette assaulted her and stole her money.
The class is justifiably shocked! They have been especially protective of Marinette and her reputation ever since she was expelled and nearly akumatized so more then a few of them start yelling at Lila even Alya who normally sides with Lila due to her belief that her designer friend is jealous is furious at Lila for making an accusation like that! Desperate to recover from the poorly timed and worded lie she’s made Lila thinks fast and comes up with a scheme just crazy enough to work! She claims that obviously it wasn’t ACTUALLY Marinette, no it was the horrible akuma MARIONETTE! The class blinks taken aback but they can’t help but ask what Lila is talking about.
The italian smirks feeling sinister pleasure course through her. She begins weaving her sob story tale! About how Marinette had snuck into one of Adrien and Lila’s photoshoots! Where the poor baker girl saw them *gasp* KISSING! Poor Marinette heartbroken and distraught was akumatized into the horrible monster Marionette! Who stalked Lila home and attacked her! She goes on to claim that the Marinette who was in class today was NOT in fact their good friend rocking a new style and haircut but was instead a vicious akuma after all why do you think Lila was keeping so far away from Marinette all day? She’s TRAUMATIZED after her ordeal and now Marionette the akuma is attending class as if she were Marinette! How terrible could Hawkmoth be to be using their heartbroken friend like this!
The class doesn’t want to believe it, but it makes such perfect sense Marinette WOULD be heartbroken by seeing Adrien the ‘love of her life’ kissing Lila her main rival! And just yesterday Marinette looked completely normal with her cute little pigtails and her signature outfit! She never told any of them she was even GOING to get a haircut! And surely if Marinette was going to make such a big change in her appearance she would have told her bestie Alya right?
But now what is the class to do? Poor Marinette is akumatized and they have no idea what to do or what her object could possibly be! Max, always the logical one concludes that they should simply contact Ladybug and have her help poor Marinette! Lila quickly jumps in claiming she already tried contacting Ladybug OBVIOUSLY since the pair are besties! But that Marionette tricked Ladybug into believing she wasn’t akumatized at all! “No!” Lila laments, “were going to need to take care of this ourselves!”
The class is resolute determined to help poor Marinette without the help of Ladybug who has fallen for Hawkmoth’s most clever trick yet. But Lila is quick to warn them that they MUST be careful after all Marionette is a VERY powerful akuma, they cant know for sure the true extent of her terrible powers or when or WHO she might attack next! Lila fears that it will be poor Adrien or perhaps herself again! Insert fake sobs here. The class vow to protect Lila and Adrien from Marionette, and Alya who believes she’s best equipped for this situation since she IS Rena Rouge takes charge of the situation, they decide that no one is allowed to be alone with Marionette and NONE of them are to let the akuma know that they are on to her! They need to play the long game and figure out what her akumatized object is so that they can snatch it and free Marinette from Hawkmoth’s dastardly clutches!
Lila rejoices believing that she’s finally achieved victory, the class now think that Marinette is a dangerous monster and will isolate her, not to mention Lila now believes she can make up any lie she wants about Marinette and that the class will unquestioningly believe her! She goes home with a pep in her step eagerly plotting for all the lies and perks she can get from this newest lie and decides to eat a whole tub of ice cream to celebrate her cleverness, unaware that she’s just signed the ticket for her defeat.
You see the class LOVE Marinette, she’s their friend, and ‘learning’ that she’s been turned into some sort of monstrous extremely clever akuma is both a suprise and none at all. Later on as they all chat in the newly made text group Max points out how it was obvious that Marinette would become the most dangerous and clever akuma shes the smartest person in class besides himself and extremely creative and resourceful. Rose laments about how hurt Marinette must be and how they simply MUST save her as soon as possible. Alix curses Hawkmoth out and claims that the sick freak was probably TARGETING Marinette for awhile now because of how awesome she is. Nino and Kim cry about how their childhood bff needs them now more then ever! And Alya tells them to get ready because they cant abandon Marinette now that she needs them most!
The next day Lila comes to class ready to spin another tale about how the vicious akuma Marionette destroyed her room last night! And while the class do listen and tell Lila that it sucks that happened they seem noticeably... Distracted. When Marinette walks into the room the class practically explodes, Rose and Juleka INSIST that Marinette sit behind them so they can talk! Everyone has some sweet compliment to give to the baker reminding her about how wonderful she is! Lila’s jaw drops open as her classmates practically rush to hug and touch and talk to what they believe is a horrible monstrous Akuma! And it doesnt end their.
Lila asks Alya to hang out at the mall? She cant her and Nino are going to be on ‘Marionette’ surveillance tracking the akuma to see what shes up to and if she might show her akumatized object! Lila decides to try woo Mylene and Ivan into letting her handle their charities ‘finances’? Mylene starts crying about how the charity was Marinette’s idea before she got akumatized and now she might not even remember how amazing it was when shes eventually de-akumatized Lila cant stand hearing them talk about her enemy and gives up her pursuit of the funds. Lila decides to hang out with Kitty Section? They invited Marionette to every show hoping Luka would notice that she’s an akuma and use his amazing intuition to help free poor poor Marinette!
Instead of ostracizing the girl Marinette is now invited to every big event, and is constantly being showered with compliments and love as if the class believes that just loving Marinette enough will be the thing that ‘de-akumatizes’ her. “At least they wont let her anywhere near myself or Adrien.” Lila thinks bitterly as she gets her 5th warning that day that Lila might want to sit out the class going to the movies together with MARIONETTE.
During this time the class has been pulling off various ‘heists’ slowly going through each and every one of Marinette’s belongings to check if its the akumatized object. And I do mean every single belonging. Her sketchbook was ruled out within the first few days same with her signature earrings it was Kim who checked those and it involved a complicated plan involving taking Marinette swimming and having Kim fake a drowning in order to get close enough to ‘Marionette’ to check the studs. Luckily for Tikki, Ondine who was also at the pool decided to save Kim instead and the poor jock got quite flustered when the swimmer performed CPR on him.
Nino and the rest of the boys are the ones tasked with breaking into Marinette’s room while the girl is away on a sleepover with the girls. In order to ‘test’ each object in her room for the source of the akuma. They got a bit too loud and had to make a last minute escape when they heard Tom and Sabine going into fight mode. Poor Nino wasn’t fast enough and was forced to lie through his teeth that he’d been trying to surprise Marinette with a hangout like when they were little kids. [poor kid ended up drinking hot cocoa with Tom and Sabine as they showed off embarrassing baby pictures of Nino and Marinette together]
After about a month or so of shenanigans including a very embarrassing incident involving the entire class accidentally spying on Marinette’s first big date with Luka/Kagami/Felix/Damian [just pick one they are all great ships] and them getting caught red handed thanks to Alix and Kim roughhousing and making a scene at the nice restaurant. And another incident that Alya refers to only as the ‘duck incident’ [Nino can no longer be around birds or feathers] the class is no closer to learning where Marionette’s akumatized object is. And Lila Rossi who thought she’d be bathing in her victory is on the verge of screaming if one more person ignores her!
How does it end? Well maybe the class stage an intervention hoping they can free Marinette with the power of love only for Marinette to fall off of something laughing when she learns what Lila’s big lie was. Maybe Lila finally snaps and screams when she hears the class lament about POOR Marinette for the billionth time. Maybe the class try breaking absolutely everything Marinette owns, Maybe Juleka points out that its kind of weird that Marionette the akuma doesn’t really do... anything? And can change clothes? Can akuma’s do that? No right??? Aren’t their clothes like melded to their body??? Maybe the class finally get Adrien thinking he can ‘fix’ Marinette only for him to very confusedly tell them hes not dating Lila and has never kissed her and what Marinette akumatized??? Maybe The class recruit Luka and Kagami, Marinette’s other friends only for them to have a great laugh at the class before pointing out the literal mountain of things wrong with everything they just said.
Just fun shenanigans and ‘akumatized’ Marinette.
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haravath0t · 4 years ago
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A Christmas Heist  Pt. I - The Briefing
Pairing: Bucky x Reader
Warnings: None, just fluff in the end! (I am truly a sucker for fluff)
A request made by @hailhydra920 !! Thank you so so much!
A/N: Hello, lovelies! Wow, a day early! Welcome to Part 1 of the Christmas Heist! I truly truly hope that you guys enjoy this as much as I did writing it! Much much hard work was needed, so feedback and commentary is very much appreciated! Happy reading, lovelies! :)
Request: “Bucky X reader where a Hydra agent dressed up as Santa and Bucky has to fight him, but the only way he can get close enough to “Santa” is dressing up as an elf. Thanks!”
*Introduction to this multi-part request can be found here!
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“With all due respect Fury, we’re going to put the public at risk just by stepping into that mall.” Bucky chimes in, analyzing the map of the mall, the responses making Fury smirk and scoff. 
“You wouldn’t be putting the public at risk if you are part of the public, now would you?”
This made all of you now confused. “What are you trying to get at, Fury?” Steve questions, leaning over now onto the table. “What I’m saying is that you all will be working in this mall. Rogers, you’re going to be their new employee-” You stop Fury’s explanation right on with your snicker and a shake of your head. “But Steve knows nothing about technology-” “Which is why he’s the one going in that store,” Fury cuts you off this time, his eyes widening as he replies with a “duh” attitude. You hated to admit it, but he had a point. 
“Cap will be disguised as an employee. Cap will only be making sure that the customers are welcomed and should they need any help, you refer them to another skilled employee, as the agents who have put this together have said. In the meantime, you can blend and wander around the store in order to find the hard drive” Steve nods, pursing his lips as he processes his role. “Alright, but what would be the use of the other two?” 
“That’s where the other building across it comes in,” Fury replies, circling it with his pointer. “Now, this is the toy store across the apple store, which is highly popular now as it transformed to a Christmas toy store. From what our agents have observed, Hydra agents are disguised in this as well. The main concern applies to the one disguised as the Santa Claus that lets kids sit on his lap. Ho, ho, ho.” You couldn’t help but snicker. “Seriously? Santa Claus? You gotta be joking, Fury.” Fury shrugs. 
“Laugh all you want, agent. It is in truth quite an interesting tactic because,” Fury raises his hands as he lets the diagram of the floor be shown through a different angle, enabling you three to see the mall as if you were walking in it, only to see the apple store across from where the powerpoint stops at. “You are looking at the apple store right from Santa’s chair. The hydra agent can look over the store and see if there are any forms of suspicious activity. You got to hand this one to them, although we are not in an easy position, obtaining the hard drive is still possible.” “So where do we come in on this Christmas toy store business then,” Bucky then questions for you two, watching Fury carefully. Your guess was probably a regular employee at the cash register. Maybe a manager? Security guard? 
“Well let’s just say that the store had open positions for Mrs. Claus and an elf.” Is the reply that comes out of Fury’s mouth. 
Now that was definitely not what you were expecting.
Your eyes went big alongside Bucky’s, the two of you looking at each other in disbelief. “Fury, I know we’ve known each other for a while and I know your humor, but this has gone too far for a joke-”“Oh this is no joke, L/N. You and Barnes need to stay close to this “Santa” of ours just in case there is any communication going on behind the scenes.” Fury says, a hint of a smile being visible as he tries his best not to snicker. Steve did not help the situation, as he quietly chuckled and looked down and covered his mouth, clearing his throat to hide the laughter. Bucky was not pleased at all, glaring at both Fury and Steve. “You really call this a dire mission when you’re playing dress up with me and Y/N?! Are you kidding?” Bucky questions, eyes fixed on Fury and clearly showing his disappointment. 
“I did say we have to hide you three from hydra’s and the public’s eye right?! Or do you immediately want to be spotted and targeted by these agents, Agent Barnes?!” Fury says strictly, the hint of laughter and smiles now gone and replaced by a pointed look, one that most would be intimidated by. 
Although you hated what was being asked of you, you saw why it needed to be done. You placed your hand on top of Bucky’s arm, giving him a knowing look, causing Bucky to pause and ground himself. This would be better explained later. Fury huffed before handing each of you three manilla envelopes. 
“Look over these. They have your fake IDs, information about you that the staff knows about, as well as the files we have found on the hydra agents actively participating. We are putting you in the job early on to avoid suspicion. Two apartments will be available to you three in the meantime so that they can’t track you back here. The hard drive, according to a call we have intercepted, will be picked up in less than two weeks to be taken to their base, so that the specialists can handle the rest and be up to date. One suspicious slip up, and we’re done for. Are we clear?”
The three of you nodded, allowing Fury to adjourn the meeting and leave the room with the already waiting Agent Hill, leaving the three of you watching each other. “I guess we’ll pack up, and meet at my office, and we’ll decide what to do from there. Meet me in 45 minutes.” Is what Steve says, before exiting out, leaving just you and Bucky to yourselves. You sighed and held his hand as you two walked out. “Gee, you would think we would catch a break during the holidays,” You say first letting yourself be guided by Bucky into the elevator, pressing the button to your floor. Bucky kissed your knuckles and offered you a little smile. “I know, sweetheart. But we make a good team, you, me, and Steve. That’s why we got called in. So that we can come back home sooner since we’re going to do the job much quicker.” You leaned your head against his arm and chuckled a bit. 
“So an elf and Mrs. Claus… how great… it’s just reminding me of that movie elf.”
This made Bucky smile. He was always amazed by your optimism.
“That movie we saw the other day, right?” He questions as the two of you made your way to your shared room, already grabbing your duffle bag and suitcase to pack weapons and clothes. “Yeah, that one!” You say, a small giggle leaving your lips and shaking your head. “Goodness, if the costume you wear for the mall is something similar to that I am only going to hope that I can keep myself together.” This made Bucky’s cheeks slowly turn red in embarrassment, thinking about Buddy’s tight yellow tights and green wardrobe. “Gosh, sweetheart, I really don’t think it’s great to think about right n-”
“Oh my gosh, what if you have to be eating spaghetti covered with maple syrup and marshmallows, and then even more candy and-”
“Really, doll? Ya gotta include embarrassing me in this last minute mission of ours?” He questions, face now red from hearing your laugh as he packs his essentials. “Whatever, we have a mission to do, so I know you wouldn’t be able to look at my elf costume so much.” You giggle and smile at him, zipping up your duffle and getting your suitcase ready. 
“I think I can get a peek or two. Besides, what about this is new? I personally think this should be a piece of cake compared to raiding hydra bases,” You say reassuringly, kissing his cheek as you pass by him to get some clothes. Bucky couldn’t help but give you a small smile, watching you as you get ready. 
He hated to admit it, but the guy could not help but worry for his girl no matter how many times you two have partnered in assignments. Sure, you might have found this funny and easy, but the concern of you possibly getting hurt was always in the back of his mind even when you went over to where you three would be staying for the meantime. He was now watching over your sleeping figure, tracing your side delicately with his vibranium digits, sighing upon the realization that he is yet again sleepless, worrying about you. 
“Mmmm Buck, stop worrying about me and go to sleep,” you mutter sleepily, halting all of his concerns. You always knew what he was thinking. His blue eyes met your sleepy ones, but he couldn’t help but smile at the state you were in. “Come back to me, Buck. You’re like a million miles away up in that head of yours,” you tease with a cute sleepy smile that he could not resist to admire. He let out a sigh and shook his head and shrugged, bringing you closer to him. 
“You know… should anything happen to you, it’s my fault. Anything that-”
“Stop that talk, James. You know that that isn’t true. You and I are professionals at this, and we are going to make sure that nothing wrong happens. Okay? Trust me, trust us. You, me, and Steve are going to do just fine. It is not our first rodeo, okay?” You whisper reassuringly, delicate fingers lightly caressing his cheek. A soft smile kisses the man’s lips, watching you in awe. You did always know what to say, hitting his concerns one at a time effortlessly. “You’re right, sweetheart, you’re right.” You smiled before you leaned forward, pressing your lips gently into his in a soft and comforting kiss, pulling away to nuzzle your nose against his. 
“I always am. Now why don’t we sleep? You and I have a mission to do and you know how much Steve hates us lollygagging. Or must I read you a bedtime story?” You tease, eyebrows wiggling, causing you both to giggle and ultimately relax. “You’d love to do just that, wouldn’t you, doll?” You smiled once again, giving your lover one more small peck before you nuzzle into his neck, allowing the scent of his cologne to surround your senses. “You and I know how I’d answer that,” you manage to mutter, before quickly returning to your wanted slumber. Bucky couldn’t help but chuckle, combing your hair ever so gently as sleep slowly starts to take over. “Mmm… you know me too well. Goodnight, Y/N,” he whispers into your head, holding you close before he also falls into his sleep. 
Boy, were you three in for a treat.
Tags: @whew-oh-em-gee​ @world-of-aus​ @world-of-aus-reads​ @tomholland-96​ @lordyitsjordy​ @letstalkaboutsebbaby​ @thee-soom-soom​ @lookiamtrying​ 
*if you would like to be a part of my tag list, please let me know! ☺️
Part 2: Going Undercover
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refinedbuffoonery · 4 years ago
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Flawless (1)
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A Heist/Ocean’s 8 AU // Masterlist 
This story has been rattling around in my head for months now, and I’m so excited to finally share it with you! I’ve been describing this as an Ocean’s 8 AU, but it’s based more on the concept of the movie than the actual plot, although a few of the basic scenes are the same. Regardless, I have big plans for these girls. Content warnings for this fic are listed on the masterlist (link above). 
*****
“Good morning,” the parole officer said. “Please state your name for the record.” 
“Riley Davis.” 
“Thank you. Miss Davis, the purpose of this hearing is to determine whether you are likely to break the law again if released. According to the record, this is your first conviction, and you have never been suspect in another criminal investigation. During your time in prison, you kept to yourself and were well behaved.” The man looked up from her file. “As you know, parole is not a right. Parole is an immense privilege, Miss Davis, one you should not take lightly.” 
“I agree,” she said. 
“Good. What would you do if released?” 
Riley paused, thinking through her answer. “I would settle down, find a good job, fall in love, maybe have kids. I’ve learned my lesson, sir. It was a mistake. Now all I want is to lead a simple, happy life.” She placed one hand over the other, crossing her fingers on her covered hand. 
He squinted at her for a long time, like he was trying to read her mind. Riley painted her face in remorse. After several minutes, the parole officer relented and, apparently satisfied with her answers, said, “Very well.” 
Riley breathed a sigh of relief. By the end of the day, she’d be free. 
The officer continued, “The following are the conditions of your parole. You will report to me, in person, every two weeks until your parole period has ended. You may not cross state lines without my express permission. You must find and maintain steady employment. You may not use drugs or alcohol, nor enter any drinking establishments. You may not possess firearms or other weapons, and you may not associate with other persons with criminal records. In addition, you must obey all federal, state, and local laws, and generally be an upstanding citizen. If you do not follow these rules, Miss Davis, you will find yourself back in custody. Do I make myself clear?” 
Riley nodded. So close. “Yes, sir.” 
Extending his hand, the parole officer said, “Congratulations, Miss Davis. You are now a conditionally free woman.” 
“Thank you.” Riley shook his hand. 
The rest was all a blur. One minute she was sitting in a cold, metal chair with her wrists cuffed to a table, and before she knew it, Riley found herself changing out of her atrocious orange jumpsuit and pulling on skinny jeans and her buttery soft black leather jacket. Wearing real clothes didn’t hide the fact that she looked like shit, but in that moment Riley didn’t care. She was getting out of prison. 
After two years, one month, and four days, she was finally being released from prison. 
Two officers walked her to the exit. Opening the door, Riley squinted in the bright afternoon sunlight. She found herself in one last cage of chain-link fences with coils of barbed wire arching over the tops, and Riley quickened her steps through the open gate in front of her. 
A familiar face waited in the parking lot, perched on the back of a motorcycle. “Welcome back,” Nikki Carpenter said. The pair shared a conspiratorial grin. 
Riley hadn’t known who the officers called to pick her up, but perhaps her best friend coming to take her home was the universe’s repayment for the last two years. Nikki handed Riley a helmet before putting on her own and swinging her leg over the sleek, white bike. 
Riley started to put the helmet on and hesitated. She turned, looking back at the concrete cage she’d spent the last two years of her life in. Even though her sentence was only three years, the nagging voice in the back of her mind had reminded her every day that she might not make it out. Taking a shaky breath, Riley vowed to herself that she would die before finding herself on the wrong side of those fences and walls again. 
Never again. No matter what. 
Nikki must’ve noticed her hesitation, because she rested a hand on Riley’s shoulder. “You okay?” 
Still facing the prison, Riley couldn’t form the words to respond. 
“Hey. Thank you,” Nikki added softly. 
Riley didn’t want to deal with the implications of that ‘thank you.’ Not yet. Finally tearing her eyes away, she said, “Let’s get out of here.”
*****
“God, I need a drink,” Riley said as soon as they entered Nikki’s cozy two-bedroom apartment. Located in the heart of downtown LA, it was on the top floor of her building, so Nikki wasn’t subject to loud overhead neighbors stomping and dropping things in the middle of the night, but the elevator moved at a glacial pace and descending twelve flights of stairs was a bitch. Riley preferred residences that were easier to vacate—in case of emergency or unfortunate run-in with the feds—but it was nice enough. 
Nikki raised her eyebrows. “Isn’t avoiding alcohol a condition of your parole?” 
Riley shot her a withering glare and strode into the kitchen. She opened the white-painted cabinet above the stove, revealing Nikki’s extensive stockpile of wine and hard liquor, and dug around until she found the mason jar full of moonshine hidden in the back. Taking a big swig, Riley held Nikki’s gaze, daring her best friend to try to stop her. 
Nikki simply opened the fridge, pulled out some sort of leftovers, and put them in the microwave. While she waited, Nikki studied her. This is what it feels like to be an animal at the zoo, Riley thought as she squirmed under her friend’s scrutiny, crossing her arms over her chest. Riley took another big gulp of moonshine, letting the clear liquid burn her throat and make her stomach churn. 
The microwave beeped. Nikki grabbed a fork and the food and held it out to Riley. Content to doom herself to the worst hangover of her life, Riley shook her head in dismissal. 
“Eat,” Nikki commanded. She tugged on the waistband of Riley’s jeans. “You and I both know those weren’t mom jeans when you bought them.” 
Riley blinked. She’d eaten less while in prison, but it never seemed like a big deal. But the way Nikki was looking at her...she might as well have turned into a skeleton. Suddenly self-conscious, Riley obediently traded her drink for the food—lasagna, she realized—and settled onto the couch. 
After two years of cardboard-flavored prison food, the lasagna tasted like heaven. 
Riley waited until Nikki was mid-gulp before announcing, “I’ve got a plan.” Her best friend nearly choked. “Want to help me get the gang back together?” 
“What’s your plan?” Nikki ground out between coughs. 
Riley grinned. “I figure it’s time we go on that little trip to Paris we’ve always talked about.” 
Nikki shook her head. “Damn, you’re one crazy bitch, Riley Davis. You know that?” She paused, contemplating. “I’m in.” Handing back the moonshine, Nikki added, “But tonight, I say we get drunk and celebrate your freedom. Deal?” 
“Deal.” 
Thirty minutes in, they’d finished the whole jar of moonshine, and Riley’s head spun. She stumbled into the kitchen in search of water, suddenly grateful Nikki had made her eat a substantial meal before drinking. 
“So,” Riley slurred. “How’s it going with that boyfriend of yours? The cute blonde one.” 
Nikki groaned. “You mean the big fat liar? Fabulous.” 
“So it all blew up in smoke.” 
“You have no idea.” Nikki shoved a handful of popcorn in her mouth. “Anyway, I’m back to being single, but Sam and Desi are still as insufferable as ever.” 
“Think they’ll get married?” 
“No way. That’s just one more thing they’d have to deal with if they ever have to fake their own deaths.” 
“On the contrary,” Riley drawled, “they should take out disgustingly large life insurance policies and then take turns faking their deaths every time they run out of money.” The idea sounded flawless to her drunk brain. “I’ll help them with their new identities for a cut.” 
“How big?” 
“Twenty percent.” 
Nikki snorted. “Like they’d ever agree to that.” 
Riley snuggled up to Nikki as they settled in to watch a movie, ducking under Nikki’s arm and using her boobs as a pillow. As Riley’s eyes caught Nikki’s laptop charging on a nearby table, her friend’s babbling about what chick-flick to watch faded into white noise. Riley’s fingers twitched. It’d been too long since she had the comfort of a keyboard beneath the pads of her fingers—since she felt powerful, the way Riley always did when armed with a computer. 
Too long, in fact, since she’d had any agency at all. Riley banished the thought before Nikki could notice where her attention had wandered. 
The movie turned out to be one they’d seen a thousand times, but Riley didn’t mind. Honestly, she needed the familiarity, not that she would admit that to Nikki. Even drunk, Riley loathed to reveal any sort of weakness, no matter how small and insignificant. 
Nikki pinched her side. “You’re brooding. Stop it.” Riley grumbled, but she let the movie distract her all the same. 
When the credits rolled, Riley glanced up at Nikki and found her friend already staring down at her as she rubbed Riley’s head. That caged animal feeling resurfaced. It was moments like these when Riley hated how well Nikki knew her, making it that much harder to hide everything going on in her head. 
In an attempt to escape, she said, “I’m thirsty. Let’s celebrate.” Riley forced a giggle as she walked back to the kitchen, grabbing two wine glasses from the cabinet. Everything in Nikki’s kitchen was exactly where it was two years ago, the layout as familiar to her as her own. Did she still have her own? Riley was too drunk to remember what happened to the spacious penthouse apartment of a convicted felon. 
“Riles, nooooooooo,” Nikki whined. “We are so drunk already. We cannot drink any more.” 
“Relax.” Riley rummaged through the fridge, pulling out the milk and a bottle of chocolate sauce. She filled the wine glasses with milk, then added an ungodly amount of chocolate, giggling again when the bottle made a fart noise. Riley didn’t mix it very well, but she was too drunk to care. “Your chocolate milk, milady.” She held out the better mixed of the two, keeping the worse one for herself. Nikki accepted. 
Riley held up her glass in a toast. “To freedom,” she said. “And doing whatever the fuck we want.”
*****
“Phone,” Riley demanded the next morning. Nikki handed hers over without even looking up from the scrambled eggs she was making. Riley unlocked it on the first try. “You haven’t changed your password in the last two years? C’mon, you know better than that!” 
“My password is twenty-nine characters long! I don’t think anyone is going to…Wait you still remember it?” 
Riley scrolled through Nikki’s contacts with one hand, the other busy stuffing her face with toast. “Obviously,” she said through a mouthful of cinnamon swirl bread. 
“Damn,” Nikki muttered, turning back to her eggs. 
Riley found the name she was looking for. Desi Nguyen. The call nearly went to voicemail before the woman on the other end snarled, “What?” 
Riley couldn’t help her grin. “I’m out, and I’ve got a job.” 
“Good for you. Let me know how long you last living the clean life.” 
“No, you jackass. A job. You in?” 
Desi didn’t even hesitate. “Hell yeah I’m in.” 
“Great,” Riley said, “and since I’m assuming Cage’s mouth is too occupied to answer, tell her I say hello.”
“Fuck off,” Desi growled, but it came out just a tad breathless. She hung up before Riley could make a snarky comment about being right. 
“So,” Nikki asked. She dumped the scrambled eggs on two plates. “Are they in?” 
“They’re in.” Riley smirked, gratefully accepting her plate. She sat down at the kitchen table and resumed scrolling through Nikki’s contacts. Riley reached the bottom of the list, but the name she was looking for wasn’t there. Riley checked again to make sure she hadn’t overlooked it. 
“Why isn’t Leanna’s number in your phone?” Nikki kept eating. “Nik,” Riley pressed. “Why don’t you have her number? What happened while I was...gone?” If Nikki noticed how she’d stumbled over the last word, her friend didn’t let on. 
“Leanna got out. Got clean. She’s CIA now.” Nikki’s cold stare was clear. Do not ask me about this again. 
“Oh.” Riley hadn’t seen that coming. “How the hell did she pull that off?” 
“She’s good at making people disappear,” Nikki said matter-of-factly. “Guess she finally used her skills on herself.” There was more Nikki wasn’t saying, but Riley didn’t push her. 
They ate their scrambled eggs in silence. 
As she cleared their plates, Nikki said, “So tell me about this plan of yours. Are we really doing it?” 
“If by ‘it’ you mean the heist of a lifetime, then yes. We are absolutely doing it.” Riley swung her feet onto Nikki’s now-vacated chair. “I had two long years to figure out exactly how to pull it off. All I need now is my team.” 
Nikki raised an eyebrow. “Your team? Last I checked, the Five Eyes were our team.” 
Rolling her eyes, Riley snarked, “Semantics.” 
“Whatever.” Nikki was clearly upset, but Riley couldn’t bring herself to care. “I’m going to take a shower.” 
“Don’t drown,” Riley replied automatically. 
As soon as she heard the rush of water moving through the pipes, Riley snatched Nikki’s laptop. Once again, the password was still the same. Nikki took long showers, so Riley figured she had at least thirty minutes to find the information she needed. 
Hacking into the CIA’s employee database was all too easy for someone like Riley Davis. She practically had the secrets of the universe at her fingertips, but Riley didn’t waste time snooping. All she cared about was one name: Leanna Martin.
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kaylorrehabcenter · 4 years ago
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Gold Rush and Happiness are Sisters
Gather round everyone and witness the clown try to prove that Taylor Swift wrote songs about a married (now pregnant) woman in the year of our lord 2020.
Also this is a seven page doc in my google docs so like. Get a cup of tea and some popcorn.
Ok full disclosure this is…..mostly me clowning. Like seriously. Don’t take my words as the word of God, this is just my interpretation and how I listen to the songs. And as a (former? Idk man) Kaylor I’m going to want to make these songs about my ship. Acknowledge your biases kids.
Also like. I change my mind a lot, but for a while this theory that Gold Rush and Happiness are connected has been stuck in my head and I wanted to write it down and post it in case anyone else got something out of this.
If you read my last post on Gold Rush (here!) you’ll know I don’t think of it as a happy song. To elaborate further- I think it’s Taylor catching herself looking back on Karlie/that time in her life (Because I think Karlie is emblematic of the 1989 era for Taylor and is thus tied to the pain that came out of that, along with her ties to the masters heist) and reminding herself it wasn’t good and ended for a reason.
“Gleaming, twinkling/eyes like sinking ships on waters/so inviting, I almost jump in”
“But I don’t like a gold rush” 
The sinking ship line makes me laugh. I like to think it’s Taylor saying she’s literally sunk our (dead) ship, but that’s mostly regressing to 2015 tumblr humur.
To the actual analysis, she almost jumps into these waters, maybe it’s literal (don’t text your ex kids, write a bop like closure instead) or maybe it’s more metaphorical. She almost allows herself to think the good times were the only times. Maybe there’s a desire to move back to nyc, capture the magic that she may have felt during the era. 
“I don’t like that flying feels like falling till the bone crush”
But that’s the thing. It feels like flying at the time, but it isn’t a feeling that can last. These relationships built on temporary promises (we’re assuming here Taylor was a side thing for Karlie, not that serious and built not to last, even if there were genuine romantic feelings on both sides, which I think there were to some level) won’t last, and will hurt when they do end. At least, this one did.
“Everyone wonders what it would be like to love you”
Everybody wants who she’s singing about and is imagining what it would be like to be with them, they think it would be a fairytale. Hell, Taylor probably thought their relationship would be a fairytale against her better judgement. Karlie is a celebrity and a model no less, yes she has other things going for her (Koding and investments), her brand and her success in the fashion world depends to some degree people desiring and fantasizing about her.
“I don’t like that anyone would die to feel your touch”
The funny thing about that, Taylor’s the only one who knows the pain of that relationship, of being a side thing and never committed to. It’s draining. It's difficult. She isn’t allowing herself to jump into those waters.
“I see me padding across your wooden floor/with my Eagles t shirt hanging on the door”
I point out this line mostly because it feels like a Delicate call back (Echoes of your footsteps on the stairs). Am I reaching though? Probably. Also as someone with parents about the same age as Taylor’s (give or take ten years), I like the Eagles reference. Stream Hotel California for clear skin <3
“At dinner parties, I call you out on your contrarian shit”
Taylor was the first person to call Karlie out on her “I’ve tried!!” bullshit, how cute. <3
Besides this line being very iconic, it also shows to me that Taylor’s been frustrated with Kar even when she was busy giving her heart eyes. She’s a frustrating person to be around even when you are “turning her life into folklore”.
“What must it be like to grow up that beautiful?/With your hair falling into place like dominoes”
Damn that’s a gay couples lines you got there Tay. Wonder if you’re wondering what it must’ve been like for Kar to grow up in the model industry, and all of the pressure and exhilaration that entails. From a male’s perspective ofc.
I also take the dominoes line to be Taylor saying what must’ve it been like to have this easy idyllic childhood. Maybe Taylor is the first time Karlie’s been with a girl outside of a hookup and didn’t have to go through the pain of realizing she was into women until later in life. (Not that that’s not painful, it’s just different, and allows you to have a perfectly straight childhood/teenagerhood)
“And the coastal town we wandered 'round had nеver seen a love as pure as it/And thеn it fades into the gray of my day-old tea/'Cause it could never be”
Maybe this relationship never existed in the way she thought at all. You know Carrie Fischer’s character in When Harry Met Sally and how until she meets the right guy, she spends the whole movie insisting that whatever married guy she’s seeing really loves her!! And he’s gonna leave his wife for her!! That’s what these two songs make me think about, waking up and realizing they were never going to leave their wife, you were projecting this whole story onto someone else, but that doesn’t mean there was no value in what happened.
“And the coastal town we never found will never see a love as pure as it/'Cause it fades into the gray of my day-old tea/'Cause it will never be”
The coastal town seems an obvious Rhode Island reference, to get more specific it reminds me of when Josh and Karlie visited Taylor at her Rhode Island home in 2014 and Josh looks peeved as hell. 1, 2 Also if I remember correctly, enty has a blind where he says there was a huge fight between Josh and Taylor which ended in Taylor not wanting to be around him again. Just interesting to note. (And if anyone has the receipt, please send it my way!)
Taylor may have been projecting this fairytale narrative at the time of being able to make it work, of being friends with Josh even but it didn’t work and the fairytale is left to be folklore, never made real.
The outro is the same as the intro to the song, implying to me that while she’s telling herself it was bad, you weren’t happy, she’s still catching herself missing it and what she had with Karlie. She left a part of her back in New York see, and she can’t stop her mind from retracing old footsteps.
Now, onto how I think Happiness and how I think it connects. I’m about to audition for the national team in the reaching Olympics. Wish me luck. :)
A bit of a preamble though, I don’t take this song ~super~ literally. Depending on what day of the week it is I think it’s probably her divorcee rpg simulator or her closing the book on her ex situationship gf on her own terms ~in a straight way~. So not to discredit this whole ass post but. Take with a grain of salt.
“Honey, when I'm above the trees/I see this for what it is”
See that bold bit? That’s the main connective tissue between these songs. She’s finally woken up and now that she’s this far removed from the relationship she sees what it was. To add to the pain of it all, this is especially potent if you wonder if Karlie gaslit Tay into thinking this wasn’t a big deal, they were just fucking around when Karlie has literal Softest Love Song You Are In Love dedicated to her.
“But now I'm right down in it, all the years I've given/Is just shit we're dividin' up”
This seems to me to be a masters heist reference. Karlie since Lover, is musically tied to this event in Taylor’s life, it’s what I think is keeping Tay from making a clean break from her so to speak. 
“Showed you all of my hiding spots/I was dancing when the music stopped”
This seems to be a Rep era/dwoht reference. Yes, Taylor constantly references dancing, but the hiding spots (loved you in secret! you had turned my bed into a sacred oasis!) combined with the dancing when the music stopped (I'd kiss you as the lights went out! Swaying as the room burned down!) brings out the full kaylor clown in me. 
“There'll be happiness after you/But there was happiness because of you/Both of these things can be true”
This is probably some of the most gut wrenching lyrics Taylor’s ever written. Damn, imagine having that written about you. Anyway, the point here is the thesis of this whole damn post. Gold Rush is Taylor catching herself daydreaming about the happy parts, and reminding herself about the bad to make her snap out of it. Happiness is her coming to terms that both parts of that relationship were true. Things aren’t that simple. 
���Haunted by the look in my eyes/That would've loved you for a lifetime/Leave it all behind”
This feels very Cruel Summer doesn’t it? “I love you ain’t that the worst thing you’ve ever heard?” These lines make this relationship read as two things to me. One, it was very one sided, and Taylor/the narrator, was obviously left behind at the end of it when she was heavily invested into making this work. And 2, it was doomed from the beginning. Again. Big cruel summer energy here.
Or it’s a divorcee rpg simulator 3000. Now with extra glamour and opportunities to dramatically drink wine in dressing gowns.
I don’t have a lot to say about the second verse of the song that. Karlie has a nice smile, Gatsby reference, dig at whoever the next person to take Taylor’s place as a side fling (or a dig at Josh, or a baby reference since that’s what the Gatsby line refers to). The only other thing worthy of note for this post is the line following the Gatsby reference.
“No, I didn't mean that/Sorry, I can't see facts through all of my fury”
 is the next line, where she regrets what she just said and admits to saying overly harsh things and overlooking the truth of the matter when she’s angry, which to me feels like a big Afterglow/Me! reference.
“There'll be happiness after me/But there was happiness because of me/Both of these things, I believe”
I think a lot of what Taylor’s doing emotionally in the chorus is legitimizing this relationship for herself. Yeah, Josh and Karlie will have a happy life in Florida with Ivanka and them, but Taylor also made Karlie happy too and she doesn’t want Karlie to forget it. 
It reminds me of the way she talks about August, that she genuinely loves James/Karlie, and thinks they have something. But she’s just the pit stop on the commitment highway, and the depth of her feelings for the other person will never be acknowledged. It’s exhausting you know?
“In our history, across our great divide”
“Guilty, guilty reaching out across the sea/That you put between you and me”
Nothing to see here, just a nifty parallel. Karlie doesn’t want wrinkles in her new life see.
“There is a glorious sunrise/Dappled with the flickers of light/From the dress I wore at midnight, leave it all behind/And there is happiness”
This bit (which has some of my favorite imagery in this whole dang album!!!) reminds me of the end of the Wildest Dreams mv where she runs out to the car with the lover following her after the big charade of pretending not to care as much as she does, while knowing you aren’t the one that got picked.
Interestingly, if you look at the shot of the four characters together near the end, the outfits parallel the ones worn by Kar, Tay, and Josh at the 2014 Met Gala. This was of course the one where Tay and Kar got ready together and Karlie proceeded to spend the night with Josh and where Tay just looks. Miserable. (see here!)
The line also parallels Wildest Dreams lyrically.
“Say you'll remember me standing in a nice dress/Staring at the sunset, babe”
Which you know. Worth noting.
The last line (And there is happiness) seems to point to there being happiness in leaving the bad situation just as much as there was happiness in the situation. It’s Time to Go anyone?
“I can't make it go away by making you a villain/I guess it's the price I paid for seven years in Heaven”
A series of thoughts. One, I love the first line where Taylor acknowledges anger isn’t going to make it better. There’s only so much being angry in this situation will do, and it’s not like Taylor’s record is clean here either. (I mean I assume. We know she went psycho on the phone anyway)
Two. Seven years in heaven is both a play on a famous game/turn of phrase (Seven minutes in heaven) but one of the more bold references to Karlie in her whole damn discography. Do I think they’ve been together for seven years straight? Not really. But do I think Taylor saw an opportunity and jumped on it? Yep. 
“And I pulled your body into mine/Every goddamn night, now I get fake niceties”
No thoughts head empty this line is a sucker punch and I love it. If anyone needs me I’ll be watching her perform ikywt on the vsfs and crying to yail.
“All you want from me now is the green light of forgiveness”
Oh look! Another Gatsby reference. Or Taylor calling Karlie out on profiting off of her association with Tay after they clearly did not end on good terms. (Folklore themed maternity shoot anyone?) I mean, whatever floats your boat. 
A bit on the green light metaphor from Gatsby, because it’s worth noting even if I don’t have much more to say on it here.
“Situated at the end of Daisy’s East Egg dock and barely visible from Gatsby’s West Egg lawn, the green light represents Gatsby’s hopes and dreams for the future. Gatsby associates it with Daisy, and in Chapter 1 he reaches toward it in the darkness as a guiding light to lead him to his goal.”
Yes I copied that from Spark Notes. No I am not sorry. I have an exam tomorrow and I’m writing about a dead ship on a dead social media website. Sometimes we do what we must do.
I love the ending of this song, I really really do, it feels like taking in a breath of air and finally feeling free of the weight you’re carrying. It feels like a final goodbye, like Tay’s getting closure on her own terms and I truly love that for her. Bb’s stepping out into the daylight. <3 
There is happiness
In our history, across our great divide
There is a glorious sunrise
Dappled with the flickers of light
From the dress I wore at midnight, leave it all behind
Oh, leave it all behind
Leave it all behind
And there is happiness
So, what was this whole seven page post for then? 
Gold Rush and Happiness being connected has been a theory rattling around in my brain for forever and I’ve wanted to write it down for just as long. The tldr of it all is pretty simple, Gold Rush is about her reminiscing about the good parts of Kaylor, and pulling herself out of it, reminding herself it was bad and bad for her. Happiness is her legitimizing the relationship, and moving on while acknowledging there was bad and good in their story. It just took me seven goddamn pages to articulate that.
If you’ve reached the end of this. Damn. Thanks. Go get a snack or something, you deserve it after reading this.
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letterboxd · 4 years ago
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How I Letterboxd #5: Will Slater.
Talking mullets and other manes with the man behind the internet’s definitive ‘exploding helicopters in movies’ catalog.
“Man cannot live on helicopter explosions alone. Even I need some occasional intellectual nourishment.”
A London-based PR man by day, by night Will Slater has a thing (and a podcast, blog and Twitter account) for movies that feature exploding helicopters. According to his Letterboxd bio, it’s “the world’s only podcast and blog dedicated to celebrating the art of exploding helicopters in films… as well as shaming those directors who dishonor the helicopter explosion genre”. As Will tells Jack Moulton, he also loves film noir, Wakaliwood, masala movies and much more. Just don’t get him started on the one action movie cliché that never fails to disappoint.
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Sylvester Stallone takes aim in ‘Rambo III’ (1988).
First things first, have you ever had a ride in a helicopter? Will Slater: What, do you think I’m mad? Of course I’ve never flown in a helicopter! If I’ve learned anything from watching hundreds of films where helicopters spectacularly explode, it’s that they are a singularly dangerous form of transport. You never know when Sylvester Stallone is going to pop up with an explosive-tipped arrow and blow you out of the sky.
I’m going to say the words ‘the definitive action hero/heroine’. Who pops into your head first? No runners-up. Go. Snake Plissken, no question, for a number of good reasons. First, there’s the look: that eye-patch, the beaten-to-hell leather jacket and Kurt Russell’s lustrous mane of hair. Second, there’s the attitude: his contempt for authority, the drawled sarcasm and all-round bad-assery. And I also like that he doesn’t have any special abilities. Action heroes generally tend to be either musclebound slabs of beef—Arnold Schwarzenegger, Stallone—or martial arts specialists—Jean-Claude van Damme, Jackie Chan—Plissken is just a pissed-off, angry dude who’s trying to stay alive. He’s very relatable. Plus, I’d argue he pretty much invented the whole anti-hero formula that rules our screens today.
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Kurt Russell as Snake Plissken in John Carpenter’s ‘Escape from New York’ (1981).
When did you start your podcast and which film got you into looking deeper into the topic? It was while watching the cheesily bad Cyborg Cop that I first had an epiphany about the weird and wonderful ways in which helicopters seemed to continually explode in movies. But the film that convinced me to start documenting the phenomenon was Stone Cold. If you’re not familiar with the film, it was an attempt to turn former gridiron star and mullet-king Brian Bosworth into the next big action star. It goes without saying that Stone Cold did not transform ‘The Boz’ into the next Arnold Schwarzenegger, but the film wasn’t a total failure as it features a helicopter explosion that is as brilliant as it is gloriously stupid.
And that was the prompt to start the Exploding Helicopter. I launched the website in 2009, and the podcast followed 2015. Since we started, our aim has been a simple one: to celebrate the strange and inventive ways that helicopters explode in films.
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Motorcycle crashes into helicopter in mid-air, ‘Stone Cold’ (1991).
When did you join Letterboxd? What are your favorite features here? I’ve been around since 2013. As for the features, the stats are very cool. When you dig into your viewing history, you can learn some very revealing things about yourself. For example, I generally like to think I have a commendably broad taste in film, and watch only the most important and influential works from every decade, genre and country. But then you look at the data and find you’ve watched Thunderball nine times in the last five years, so maybe you’re not as cool as you thought.
We noticed that your profile faves are low-key and explosion-free, given your theme of choice. Why these four and not Die Hard four times? Man cannot live on helicopter explosions alone. Even I need some occasional intellectual nourishment, between watching whirlybird conflagrations. There’s a little bit of nostalgia tied up in The Ipcress File. I first saw it as a kid, and it made a big impression on me. It’s very stylishly directed, has a great John Barry score and a star-making turn from Michael Caine. I’m a big film noir fan and Sweet Smell Of Success is a beautifully sour tale of cynicism and manipulation. To borrow the words of Burt Lancaster in the film, it’s a “cookie full of arsenic”.
Jean-Pierre Melville is my favorite director and Le Samouraï was the first of his films that I saw. What Melville does so masterfully in this, and his other crime films, is distil the elements of film noir. Basically, he takes the genre’s iconography—the gun, the trenchcoat, the fedora—and familiar plot tropes—the betrayed assassin, the heist gone wrong, the criminal doing one last job—then elevates them above cliché into something almost mythic. And what do I really need to say about Taxi Driver, other than it’s a masterpiece?
Now you say you shame directors who dishonor the art of helicopter explosions? Which directors did you dirty? Well, one of the biggest names in our hall of shame is Tony Scott. For a man who specialized in hyper-stylized, pyrotechnic-filled action movies, he flunked every helicopter explosion he filmed. In our eyes, one of the most egregious offences you can commit is failing to show the helicopter explosion. And in both Spy Game and Domino, old Tony cheats the viewer by having the chopper fly out of sight before it explodes. Now, I can accept such visual chicanery in a low-budget film, where they presumably don’t have the money to stage the scene, but what’s Tony’s excuse? If you look at his filmography, at one time or another he’s wrecked trains, planes and automobiles in spectacular fashion. But for some reason, he repeatedly couldn’t be bothered to give us a satisfying chopper conflagration. At a certain point, it starts to feel like a personal slight. Tony, what did I ever do to you?
In your immortal words, “a film is always improved by a helicopter explosion.” When has this been especially true? When you see lists of worst-ever directors, Uwe Boll is a name that always seems to turn up. And, according to the internet, one of his worst-ever films is the video game adaptation, Far Cry. Now, I’m not going to try [to] convince you that the film is a neglected classic, but it does have a very imaginatively staged exploding helicopter scene. It’s too convoluted to explain here, but take my word that it wouldn’t be out of place in a Fast and Furious movie.
What about the unsung heroes; the stunt artists, the pilots, the pyrotechnicians, the VFX wizards who have worked on numerous iconic action moments, all of whom deserve a shoutout? Personally, I don’t understand why the Academy doesn’t have a stunts category. But if they did, I’d be lobbying hard for Spiro Razatos to get the first award. These days, he works as a stunt coordinator on the Fast and Furious and Marvel films, but I’d like to draw people’s attention to some of his early work. Back in the nineties, he did a lot of work with PM Entertainment films, an independent company that made low-budget action films for the home video market.
They might not have had much money, but they put every cent on the screen with glorious, raucously inventive set pieces that were often more spectacular than big-budget Hollywood offerings. And remember: this was in pre-CGI times, so every death-defying detail was absolutely ‘real’. Go back and watch films like The Sweeper or Rage, and you’ll can see why Super Spiro has now graduated to these more prestigious gigs.
Narrow this list down for us: which is the ultimate most spine-tingly epic “we got company” movie moment? As you may have gathered, I do like an action movie cliché. When you encounter one in a film, it’s like meeting an old friend. And one of my favorites is when someone uses this classic line of dialog to signal that a car chase or a gun battle is about to start. I’ve heard people deliver the line in all sorts of ways–funny, scared, angrily and often just badly. But if you want spine-tingly, then you can’t beat Harrison Ford in Star Wars. He drops the line during the detention-block scene after failing to bluff an imperial officer. As soon as he says it, John Williams’ iconic score kicks in. It gives you the ‘feels’ every time.
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“Boring conversation anyway.” Han Solo and Chewbacca in ‘Star Wars’ (1977).
And which action movie cliché can you simply not stand? Stop it: my hackles are raising just thinking about it. For me, the trope that never fails to disappoint is the ‘reluctant’ hero being convinced to take up arms and join the fight. You know the scene. Invariably, the hero has hung up their spurs and is living a bucolic existence ‘off the grid’, when a gruff buddy shows up asking them to risk almost certain death by taking on ‘one last job’. Now, dialog is rarely an action film’s greatest strength, and these beefcake actors generally are not cast for their dramatic chops. Which means we get subjected to the same perfunctory and uninteresting scene over and over again: “I told you, I’m out the game”, “Goddamnit, we need you”, “OK, I’ll do it”. These scenes just never work and are never less than painful to watch.
Which up-and-coming action director are you most excited about? In terms of up-and-coming action talent, I’d pick the director Stefano Sollima. I first noticed his work on a couple of TV series: the fantastic Italian crime dramas, Romanzo Criminale and Gomorrah. The way he composed shots really stood out, and it was clear he had a very cinematic eye. He rather reminds me of Michael Mann. He’s now on Hollywood’s radar and got to direct Sicario: Day of the Soldado the other year. And he’s lined up to make a Tom Clancy adaptation with Michael B. Jordan. I can’t wait to see what he comes up with.
Have you witnessed the glory that is Wakaliwood—Ugandan DIY action filmmaking—three of which make Letterboxd’s official top ten films by black directors? Which international films do you feel out-match Hollywood? I love the Wakaliwood films I’ve seen. It’s fascinating to watch action films from around the world and see their different styles and flavors. Recently, I’ve been trying to investigate Indian cinema and, in particular, what are known as ‘masala movies’. These mix action, comedy, drama, romance and dance numbers into one big, crazy, entertaining mess. They’re a unique experience. If you want to check one out, I’d suggest Dhoom 2. It’s bananas.
Can you believe there are only two female directors represented in your exploding helicopter list? Do you believe that’s due to systemic or thematic reasons? You have to say it’s systemic. Men have dominated filmmaking for more than a century. Until women have the same opportunities to direct and make films as men, it’s impossible to know what their interest may or may not be in blowing up helicopters. [Will has previously written about the search for “true gender equality in the world of exploding helicopters”.]
To address the elephant in the room, how has Kobe Bryant’s unfortunate death earlier this year changed the way you look at these scenes? Obviously, I appreciate that Kobe Bryant’s death was very shocking and a tragedy for his family and fans. But basketball really is not a thing on these grim shores, so it didn’t register with us unenlightened Brits other than [as] a sad headline about a US sports star.
What was your most anticipated movie event of 2020 before Covid-19 pushed every tentpole back? That’s easy: No Time To Die. I’m a huge Bond fan and as soon as tickets were available, I booked myself in to see it on opening day at an IMAX. But if the Daniel Craig era is synonymous with anything, it’s lengthy delays between films.
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Freerunner Sébastien Foucan in the opening scene from ‘Casino Royale’ (2006).
What’s a fond memory you have in theaters related to the Bond franchise? I remember going to see Casino Royale. I was excited, but also nervous to see it. The Brosnan era had ended with the risible Die Another Day: invisible cars, kitesurfing and, worst of all, John Cleese’s awful Q. Since that had come out, we’d had Mission: Impossible, Bourne and the Triple X films, so it wasn’t beyond the realms of possibility that Bond might be finished. Then the first ten minutes of Casino Royale happened. And while that outstanding parkour-inspired chase was terrifically exciting, it also hit me like cinematic Valium. I suddenly realised I could sit back and relax, safe in the knowledge that 007 was going to be just fine.
Are you planning on returning to theaters as soon as you can? When would you feel comfortable? I’m taking a wait-and-see approach. I’d love to see films back on the big screen again, but I want to know more about how cinemas are going to maintain social distancing inside.
Finally, what three Letterboxd accounts should we all be following? Why not give Todd Gaines, Jayson Kennedy or Fred Andersson a follow? If you’re interested in genre films that are a little off the beaten trail, they’ll likely all steer you towards some hidden gems.
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mymarvelbunch · 5 years ago
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Be Your Own Hero - Steve Rogers x Reader (Part 4)
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Masterlist
Summary: Y/N has lost all her family and most friends in The Decimation (I refuse to call it The Blip). Refusing to believe their deaths are permanent, she dedicate years to find a way to reverse it. When she finally finds something that might help, she searches for the Avengers. It’s Steve Rogers x Reader, but there is also a lot of Badass!Reader. Also, Non-American!Reader. If you are American, think of a country you’d have loved to be born into :D
Warnings: none!
Note: Y/Co = your country. Y/Ci = your city; Y/N/L = your native language.
Previously: Romanov asked to speak alone with Rogers, and two left the room. Scott looked at you. “They probably think it’s a trap.”“I’ll bring Wong here if I have to”, you replied instantly. “I spent three years finding a way to bring my family and friends back. I won’t give up now because the Avengers think I’m HYDRA, or whatever.” There must be have been something in your expression that frightened Scott, because he quickly looked away. “I believe you”, he said in a low voice. “I have to.”And you understood. You had to believe in yourself, too.
Part Four
In the end, you did have to bring Wong to the Avengers’ headquarters - without Scott, because Romanov and Rogers didn’t want to ‘risk anything’. At least Uber was cheap.
As soon as you identified yourself as an apprentice from Y/Co, who studied the Infinity Stones under a Master’s supervision, Wong recognized you. He asked you many things and agreed to confirm your story to the Avengers.
“Forgive me for my skepticism, sir”, Rogers said when Wong finished talking. “But I’m curious: if all Y/L/N said is true, why hasn’t any of your sorcerers come up with this idea before?”
“Because none of us had the idea of joining magic and science to do it”, Wong replied instantly. “Had Strange survived, I don’t doubt he’d have reached a similar conclusion. He and Miss Y/L/N are rather similar in that aspect.”
You were pretty sure he was praising you, so you thanked him. “If my task is done here”, he continued, “I’d like to go back to the Sanctum. I have important work to attend to.”
Rogers nodded and opened the door for Wong to leave. You offered to pay an Uber ride, but he said it wasn’t needed. When the doors closed, you turned to Rogers. “So, are you going to believe me now?”
He sighed. “I suppose so. Still, none of us have resources to create a... what you called it? A time heist. We’d need help.”
“So, we go get it”, Scott said. “Where is Tony Stark?”
The following day
Stark’s new home was a few hours away, so Romanov suggested they all got proper rest before getting on the road. You promptly agreed; you haven’t slept well since the day you boarded the plane to Los Angeles, nor eaten well for that matter.
Unfortunately, there was barely no food in the kitchen. Romanov apologized and blamed herself; she had postponed grocery shopping for quite some time now. “You can order something, though.”
“Maybe, if I knew how to. Or where to. I have no idea how delivery works here.”
She frowned. “Just like in any other city.”
“Yeah, any other American city. I’m from Y/Co, I’ve never even used dollars before this week.”
The former assassin raised her eyebrows. “Oh, you’re not from US. Well, neither am I, but I’ve learned how to order food online. What do you want?”
Eventually Rogers and Scott showed up hungry as well, so you ordered two big pizzas. While they waited, Romanov asked you about your life. You told her (and technically the men too) about your former job as a doctor, your deceased family and friends, and some of your journey to get what you were now. At one point, after the pizzas arrived, Rogers started asking about Y/Co, and you animatedly gave him details, glad to change the subject.
You wanted to ask them about their lives too, but refrained yourself. They were only asking so they could judge your character, not to make friends with you. At least, that’s what you believed.
You slept on where used to be Scarlet Witch’s room. There were few of her personal belongings, since she had taken most with her upon running away. Honestly, the lack of decoration was comforting; you didn’t think you’d be able to sleep well in among the reminders of a ghost.
Rogers took Scott’s van to the road, due to the machine inside. The ride was mostly silent, despite Scott’s attempts at conversation. You were all tense; Tony Stark was your best shot at putting your plan in motion.
You arrived in a big wood house in the middle of a small forest. Rich people, you briefly thought as you got out of the van and followed Rogers and Romanov to the house.
You recognized Stark from the news as you got closer. His hair was partially dyed blonde, and he was playing with a little girl. You smiled a little; you had read somewhere about his daughter Morgan Stark, and there she was.
Stark raised his head and made little attempt to hide his surprise. “Hello guys”, he said. “It’s been a while, huh?”
“We need your help, Tony”, Rogers said matter-of-factly.
Stark sighed and asked for his daughter to go inside. Then he stood up to face them - or rather, Captain. “Of course you do”, he said. “With what? And who are those?” He glanced at Scott, but set his eyes on you.
“You may not remember me”, Scott said, “I’m Ant-Man. I was on Cap’s side-”
“-On Germany. Yeah, I remember you now. Thought you were dead. And you?”
“I’m Y/N Y/L/N, Mr. Stark.”
“She’s kind of the reason we’re here”, Romanov added. Stark frowned and gestured for them to sit down.
A two-hour explanation later
At that point, they were all in the living room. Pepper Potts had joined them after letting Morgan play in her bedroom.
“I know it sounds crazy and impossible and surreal”, you said at the end. “And it’s probably a poorly written movie plot somewhere. But this... this is a real change. To bring everyone back. Half the freaking universe. Just... please, Mr. Stark. Give it some thought.”
You felt tears threatening to fall, and then a hand on your shoulder. You turned to see Romanov looking softly at you. Behind her, Rogers had a soft look of his own.
Then you turned back to Stark, who sighed. “Look, there is a lot at stake here. I’m well aware of what we lost, but Morgan is not the only child born after the Decimation. Even though you are telling me time travel only creates alternate timelines, there is no telling nothing will truly change here. Are those children’s lives worth the risk?”
You took a breath. “Honestly, I haven’t thought of that, because in my mind they wouldn’t be at any risk. At all. If we play our cards right, people will only notice we did something when people start to come back.”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean that, we go back in time, get the Stones, come back to same moment we left here, make our wish and voila! Everyone comes back. Your daughter wouldn’t even notice you were gone. No one would.”
A brief silence. “I need time. Not to think whether I’ll do it or not. But we have to find a safe way to travel back in time. We don’t even know if we’ll make it alive. Scott has survived, yes, but we don’t know if we can reproduce it.”
“Actually”, Scott interrupted, “it is possible. I wasn’t the first one to get stuck in the Quantum Realm.” He briefly told them about Janet Van Dyne, who also seemed to have been unable to tell how much time has passed.
“This Quantum Realm sounds like Narnia or something”, you mumbled, but Stark heard you.
“Exactly, Y/N. That’s why we need to make our safety top priority. Only then we map our strategy. I won’t risk anyone’s lives.”
Rogers nodded. “Fair enough. How much time do you need? Do you need any help?”
“A month. Scott’s van has the machine that took him to the Quantum Realm, right? It’s gonna be useful. Don’t worry, I’ll get you a car to drive back to New York. Also, Scott’s experience on the machine will be useful, so I’d ask you to stay around. Do any of you know how to get in touch with Banner? He’d be a great help in this. Also, Nebula and the Raccoon. Is there any way to contact them?”
“The Raccoon?”, you mumbled. Scott look equally bewildered. Romanov, however, was unreadable.
“I get in touch with all of them on a weekly basis. It’ll take a while for them to get here, but it’s manageable. Anything else, anyone else?”
“I’d say our quasi-sorcerer over here, but honestly, Y/N, you look a little sick. I’d suggest you all to use the following month to gather as many allies as possible and get some training done. We don’t know what we’ll find in this time travel thing. We all need to be prepared.”
You looked down at yourself. While you couldn’t notice anything alarming, Stark wasn’t wrong. In the year you spent at Y/Ci’s Sanctum, you did little exercise and ate only the strictly necessary to avoid hunger from distracting you.
Stark stood up to bid them goodbye, but suddenly the little girl ran downstairs. “Daddy, Daddy! Who are these people? Are they your friends?”
She saw you and ran to you. “You seem nice”, she said. “Are you nice?”
Giggling, you opened your arms in invitation. She climbed to your lap. “I don’t know, you tell me! By the way, what’s your name, little one?”
The girl beamed. “I’m Morgan! Are you Daddy and Mommy’s friends?”
You looked around the room. Potts just nodded and gestured for you to keep going. “Yes, we are. Why do you wanna know that, Morgan?”
“Because Daddy and Mommy’s friends are my friends too! Do you wanna play?”
Your face showed genuine sadness. Poor girl probably didn’t have many friends around to play with, given the secluded place she lived in. “Oh Morgan, we’d love to, but we have to get going. It’s a long way to New York.”
Morgan asked to be taken along, because she wants to visit New York so much, but Scott managed to get her attention. Potts thanked everyone, and especially you, for giving them hope, and led them to the garage. 
“You are good with kids, huh”, Rogers commented as you followed Potts. You shook your head.
“Don’t let that moment fool you, Captain. I’m actually a disaster.”
He let out a small laugh, but didn’t reply as they arrived at the garage. “Tony loves cars”, she explained. “It’s a rich men thing. Pick whichever you like.” They left the choice up to Rogers, the driver. The first sentence said on the car after they left the house was spoken by Romanov: “I honestly thought this was going to be way harder.”
You wanted to say it was easy for her to say that when it was you who spent two hours straight talking, with only a couple intermissions from Scott, but you kept your mouth shut. The Avengers knew each other for a decade; the woman could be talking about something else entirely.
“Now what?”, you asked instead.
“I’ll contact all of our allies, as Tony told us to do”, she replied. “Despite the Decimation, we have quite a number of them. Meanwhile, Steve will train you.”
You could almost feel Rogers’ question as he briefly turned to his teammate, but he said nothing on the subject. Soon you arrived back at the Avengers headquarters.
“You heard her”, Rogers said at your side as you got in the building. “Training time. But first, let’s get you in shape. You do look a little sick.”
Next
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I decided to dedicate a part exclusively to training month, so we can have more detailed moments between the two of them. So, part 5 will feature training and recruiting. We’ll see the remaining Avengers coming together to save the universe!
Part 6 will feature major changes in Endgame canon. I want the Reader’s presence to actually change the course of events, not just Steve’s storyline. So be prepared!
Taglist (open!): @autobotgirl15-blog​ @starstrucknature @cheeseburgersstuff​ @aamzter2013
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thedeaditeslayer · 5 years ago
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Running Time Restored Interview: 1997 Josh Becker and Bruce Campbell Indie Gets a New Life in 2K.
You can read the full interview on the upcoming release With Josh Becker, Bruce Campbell, and Don May Jr. from Diabolik Magazine below. 
In 1995 on New Year’s Eve, Josh Becker had an idea. Born out of a session pondering Alfred Hitchcock’s legendary, true crime classic, Rope, he decided that he was going to improve upon the master of suspense’s legendary concept of shooting a film in real time. A daunting task but Becker was up to the challenge.
What resulted was perhaps one of the most ambitious efforts to ever grace the silver screen, Running Time. This neo-noir thriller about a heist gone wrong and a small-time criminal who rekindles his love affair with his high-school sweetheart was a hidden gem that didn’t get the recognition that it deserved. Written expressly for Becker’s childhood friend and Super 8 cohort, Bruce Campbell, the pair were once again, doing gonzo-style filmmaking just like when they were growing up in Michigan with the likes of Sam Raimi and Rob Tapert.
Josh Becker was and is an adventurous soul who does things his way, just like the director gods of old. When I think of his work, the names of John Ford, William Wyler and John Huston readily spring to mind. There is something admirable about his driven determination that was the heart and soul of this black and white throwback to another era which is ultimately endearing. Yes, I have a special place in my heart for Running Time because it is honest and not filled with “tentpole” tendencies. At the core of it is the written word. The end result is one of the most overlooked masterpieces of both Becker’s and Campbell’s careers.
What is truly amazing is that this flick was shot in two weeks and that everyone went home early. It was like having a 9 to 5 job. No 18-hour-days, just fast, efficient, run and gun style filmmaking that resulted in a production that could stand toe to toe with noir classics from a bygone era like The Petrified Forest and Desperate Hours.
Prior to Running Time, Bruce was known predominantly for his work in the horror and science fiction genres which can sometimes be limiting for an actor. Becker gave him an incredible script to work with that really showcased his range as a thespian. Behind the smart-ass quips and bravado lies a talented individual who takes his craft seriously. He is capable of creating complex characters and he is most assuredly fit to be a romantic lead.
I had the chance to sit down with the major players in the restoration of Running Time (Josh Becker, Bruce Campbell, Don May, Jr. and Gerry Kissell) to reminisce about the journey of this film from its humble beginnings to preserving this indie classic for future generations.
The Director and His Muse
Diabolique: Bruce, I have to start off by telling you that Running Time is my favorite out of all of your films.  
Bruce Campbell: It’s a cool, little flick. Too bad it sort of escaped, it wasn’t released as the old joke goes.
Diabolique: What I like so much about it is the neo-noir aspect. It’s a throwback to the 40’s and 50’s. In Josh’s book, Rushes, he talks about how he convinced you to be in the film. You weren’t getting paid and you invested in it. What was his pitch, how did he sell the concept to you?
BC: The pitch was that it was NOT McHale’s Navy. I just spent 11 weeks in Mexico just sort of bullshitting our way through that film where we would make up our lines of dialogue because there was nothing written for us. In the script it would say things like, “McHale and his guys get off the boat,” “McHale and his men go to Cuba.” Which means they hadn’t thought anything up for you. I did it because I liked the show as a kid. It was a very popular thing; it was from Universal. It made sense at the time. It was just a case of when something is underwritten, the problem that it causes actors. I had just come off of that, and Running Time was very ambitious, low budget it was meant to be this conceit of being done in one shot so it was cinematic. So, I was like, okay, yeah. It was like the anti-studio movie, small crew, fast moving and yet no money. Basically, I invested the money that I was paid back into the movie in order for them to make it. It was definitely for a love of the movie type deal.
Josh Becker: I’ve known Bruce since we were twelve and I’d seen him in a number of plays. I knew that he had a much bigger range as an actor than he’d had a chance to show at that point. Plus, he’s a pleasure to work with. Once I pitched him the idea, he was all for it, partially because the long takes are a way for an actor to really show their ability.
Diabolique: Thinking about your filmography, Bruce, you haven’t played a traditional romantic lead. Do you see Running Time as a love story of sorts?
BC: What’s funny is Josh had Carl come back. In a proper film noir, he would have gone, you would have heard the tires squeal and she would be sitting there crying and the credits would roll and that would be it. It would be bleak, but Josh deep down is a sentimentalist and I think I am too. We had no issue with the happy ending. We wanted to make the audiences think for quite a long period of time that it’s going to be a sad ending. She packs her bag and then she unpacks it. The whole thing is quite an extended piece but I thought it was well worth playing just to kind of throw a little wrinkle in it. Maybe even in a criminal story you can have a happy ending.
Diabolique: In terms of the storyline, Josh, we all know that Rope was the blueprint for Running Time. You hadn’t made a film in 7 years. What was it about that production that captured your imagination besides the challenge of the “long take”?
JB: Part of my inspiration was simply getting another feature film made after seven years of working in television, which was never my goal.  But as I thought about Rope, I wondered why the continuous, real-time concept didn’t really have any impact on the story. Then it occurred to me that there was no time element involved.  Two young men—ostensibly Leopold and Loeb—have killed another young man for the fun of it, put the body in a chest, then invited people over for a party, including a cop. Well, if the chest was spring loaded and had a timer on it so that at some point it would pop open and reveal the corpse, that would be a time element. So, I thought, how do you use the real time technique and add a ticking clock? The first story that came to mind was a heist which generally has a time element—we’ve got to get the money and get out of here before we’re caught.
Diabolique: Running Time was shot in sequence like a play. Did it pose any challenges for you as an actor?
BC: I liked what Josh was trying to do. These long uninterrupted takes from an actor’s point of view, you know stuff can get really choppy these days. My complaint from Burn Notice is they wouldn’t let a full sentence stay on camera; they would have to cut away to somebody else. It felt like they had to keep cutting, cutting and cutting. This movie was no cutting for like ten minutes at a time. It’s great from an actor’s perspective because you can feel the juices flowing. It’s like a play. You can work on the pacing; you can have something build over a period of time and minutes to play out in literally real time. It’s a real time crime drama. I liked it conceptually and it was challenging. There was a fair amount of dialogue because my guy, Carl is calling the shots. I thought it was a good premise. Guy gets out of prison turns right around and robs the prison because he knows how the prison laundry system works. I thought that was pretty sound. I am always sympathetic for the low budget independent movie. I always will be.
Diabolique: Were there any other films that influenced you and your writing partner, Peter Choi? The entire concept is very noir and the desperate situation that Carl finds himself in is reminiscent of any number of films from the 1940s.
JB: My main inspiration was Straight Time with Dustin Hoffman, an overlooked movie from 1978. And though I didn’t think of it at the time, several folks brought up Joseph Lewis’s Gun Crazy after it came out, and I do see that. The film has one long take in it during a bank robbery, and even though the camera stays in the backseat of a car, it has that same feeling of a real time event.
Diabolique: I know you are a fan of classic movies, Bruce and in a sense Running Time reminds me of Desperate Hours or The Petrified Forest especially when the robbery is botched and the situation is escalating in the enclosed office. Did you find any inspiration from the noir genre for your portrayal of Carl?
BC: No, but the classic tough guys were always awesome. We loved them all, Bogart and Robert Mitchum…the fact that Josh shot the film in black and white was perfect. Because it really helped lend itself to a look of that time period when Jack Palance was a leading man.
Diabolique: In your book Rushes, you talked about your decision to shoot in 16 mm Kodak ASA 64 black and white stock. You get sharper images due to the finer grain of the film, but did that pose any problems in terms of showcasing your work at that time since most people weren’t shooting in black and white?
JB:  I didn’t think of it regarding showcasing my work. I thought it was appropriate for the subject matter and that it would be visually striking.  Also, moving the camera from inside to outside in color posed the problem of adding or removing filters which would not be an issue with black and white.
Diabolique: You shot over a period of 10 days which was unheard of even back in the 90’s. How were you able to keep things moving along?
JB: It was based on pre-planning. I knew exactly what I wanted. We rehearsed the film and the actors were all very comfortable with the dialogue. Then it was just an issue of getting the complicated camera moves in regard to the actor’s blocking to work right, and that didn’t turn out to be all that difficult.
Diabolique: As an actor, did you enjoy working on an accelerated timetable?
BC: It was exciting to do and so different. The toughest thing was the technical demands. It wasn’t like there were explosions and stuff like that. But in order to do blocking inside of an apartment, the camera is moving in circles, well, the crew had to move every object behind the camera before it got there and then had to put it back before the camera saw it again. So, there was a lot of voodoo, a lot of magic. We would rehearse and rehearse and rehearse and we could never get it right. Finally, we were like fuck it. Let’s just start shooting because everyone gets a little more alert when you shoot. That did it. That allowed us to conquer the impossible. After 3 or 4 takes if we got it, we were done even if it was 10:30 in the morning. I don’t think we spent more than two thirds of a day getting that particular shot. The end result is cool. I’ve seen the cleaned-up version without all the scratches and the dust marks. You can’t even tell what year it is. It almost seems like its videotape transferred like those teledramas of the 60’s that were done on TV. There were moments in the film that weren’t perfect, and that’s okay.
Diabolique: When I revisited Running Time recently, I was impressed with how well it holds up because some efforts don’t. With the 2K restoration, Bruce, this will give your fans a chance to see it. For some, it might be their first time. Do you have a scene that you are particularly fond of?
BC: There’s some scenes that are fun to do. After I get shot, I am in Janie’s apartment and she’s trying to put me together, that fainting on the toilet while she’s trying to patch me together it felt kind of real, playing shot and being delirious. Stuff like that. Just fun to be able to take the moment to do it.
Diabolique: Josh, do you feel shooting in black and white made the 2K restoration more challenging?
JB:  Slow speed black and white film stock has a lot of silver in it which creates an inordinate amount of static electricity. When I did the initial film transfer back in 1997, the negative kept getting covered with dust, causing us to have to stop and clean the film every 30-60 minutes. Since the transfer was $375 an hour—in 1997 dollars—I could only stop so many times before it became financially prohibitive.  Dust on a black and white negative shows up as white dots. Using the newest technology, Don May was able to remove all of the dust digitally. Therefore, the film has never looked as good as it does now.
Diabolique: What excites you the most about Running Time getting restored, Bruce?
BC: I am always happy when something gets re-released which means in this case, it gets preserved. It will look fantastic in 2K. That’s why with all these reissues fans are like, “Why should we care?” Like well, if you care about preservation, this means it will be the latest version of a movie that is fairly obscure. Sometimes a movie can die on the vine because no one will pay the money to keep it current. Now, we can show the sucker, hopefully, anywhere.
Diabolique: Josh, do you have any plans to showcase Running Time once the restoration is completed? This is a great film that fans should definitely see.
JB: We have no plans at the moment, but then the film isn’t out yet. When it’s done, we’ll see what happens.
Breathing New Life into Running Time: The Art of Restoration
Don May, Jr. along with Jerry Chandler and Charles Fiedler created Synapse Films in 1997. Known for their work in preserving unique genre classics, May had previously collaborated with Josh Becker when his company restored the director’s 1985 production, Thou Shalt Not Kill…Except.
Gerry Kissell was the official artist on Running Time and will be reprising his role for the 2K restoration. He has been friends with Josh since the Freaky Film Festival where he and Bruce premiered the film on the University of Illinois campus.
Both gentlemen were kind enough to take time out of their busy schedules to talk to us.
Diabolique: Were you able to obtain the original negative for Running Time?
Don May, Jr: Yes, thankfully. Josh Becker is a true movie fan and loves the filmmaking process, so we were fortunate to work with him. He kept everything stored properly in a climate-controlled vault, as a man who cares about his movies should.
Diabolique: Can you talk about the scanning process for 2K?
DMJ: The 16mm negative was separated into A/B rolls, so we had to scan a lot of reels separately at Prasad in Burbank, CA. Luckily, because of the actual nature of the “one-take” aesthetic Josh utilized, there were only a total of about 30 cuts in the entire film… hidden in editing, of course. So, we basically scanned the 30 separate shots, and then assembled them digitally using DaVinci Resolve. We had to be VERY careful the way we put the 30 cuts back together, making sure the shots were frame accurate and of the proper length. Unlike a film that has a conformed negative separated into 10- or 20-minute reels, Running Time was all in separate pieces, with each shot edited on separate reels. It was a challenge, but we were able to use a previous master as a reference and most of it went together without a hitch. Being shot in B&W also helped in color correction to hide the edits properly to make the real-time aspect as seamless as possible. Once the film was properly assembled, we were able to ship everything off to India for restoration. Because Josh had everything stored properly for decades, the negative itself was fairly free of a lot of dirt and scratches, but we did carefully sonically clean all the pieces before scanning commenced.
Diabolique: How long does it take the digital artists to fix debris or scratches on the original negatives?
DMJ: There’s a lot of data wrangling involved. Copying data for safety. Making backups, etc. But we have a great working relationship with Prasad. They have worked on such classics as Lawrence of Arabia, How the West Was Won, A Fistful of Dollars, Gandhi, The Red Shoes, etc. They do the lion’s share of my output, and I put a lot of trust in them. They’ve never failed me. We do ship the film scans to India and that takes time. I think Running Time took about 4-5 months. I let them take their time, though, because I don’t want to have to keep sending things back for fixes. With Running Time, they did an excellent job, right from my first restoration test reels. But, again, Josh had taken very good care of his materials, so it wasn’t much of a challenge.
Diabolique: Gerry, what artwork did you originally provide for Running Time and what can we expect from you for the 2K restoration?
Gerry Kissell: I did promotional art that ended up on tee-shirts. It included the shot of the three main characters, which I called Tres Hombres, on one, Jeremy Roberts aiming the pistol at the camera on another, and the last, which you’ve seen of Bruce’s mug all heroic and chinny. All of the art was done on Bristol cold press illustration board. The new painting for the Synapse release is me, 20+ years later, a tad bit better at drawing and painting, lol.
Diabolique: Besides the idea of preserving Running Time, Don, what attracted you to the project?
DMJ: We had worked previously with Josh on Thou Shalt Not Kill…Except, and we had a lot of fun with that one. I like working with Josh. He’s a great guy, and I love that he’s so passionate about film. He loves movies, and he loves MAKING movies. It’s so great to see people like Josh doing things like Running Time, back when using computers to do a “one take” approach was non-existent. You see things today like the film 1917, which is a fine film in its own right, but they cheated a lot of its “one take” aspect using computers. Josh did Running Time, but used his brain, and actual organic film splicing and editing to achieve the same result. He’s smart, funny, talented and I love working with people like him. It also doesn’t hurt that Running Time stars Bruce Campbell, so… yeah… of course, we jumped at the chance to do it.
Diabolique: When can fans expect to see the Running Time 2K restoration?
DMJ: I would imagine late summer/early fall 2020. We’re wrapping up extras and artwork now.
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lamiasluck · 5 years ago
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Freed From Solitary
(Thank you @xpouii again for the prompt! I started this immediately after watching heist lol)
Summary: The new egos arrived and now live with the rest of the egos. For the most part, it all goes well! Illinois and Captain fit in perfectly! However, Yancy finds himself out of his element with the new environment. The new house is far more different than the prison, and Yancy begins to miss his old "home". As he wallows in his homesickness, someone notices how distant he's acting. Eric can spot his anxieties from a mile away and tries his best to help the newbie.
Characters: Eric Derekson and Yancy
Words: 1639
Read on AO3!
The others weren’t sure what to do with Yancy when he arrived. Illinois and Captain were fine, more eccentric personalities to match the rest, but Yancy? Yancy was a new case.
On the surface everything seemed fine, at first he seemed standoffish, but no one blamed him. It was a new place to get used to, after all. However, a keen eye could notice something deeper behind that cool attitude. They could see it in the ways he kept his responses short, in the fact that he found any excuse to lock himself in his room, and by seeing how awkward he acted. Which is why Eric began to worry about the newest ego.
It didn’t take long for Eric to notice something awry, though he was surprised that no one else could tell. Maybe it was because they didn’t know how to deal with shy personalities. Eric knew that fact very well. But Yancy didn’t seem shy like him, just… out of place. It would take awhile before Eric mustered up the courage to confront him about that. Yancy was still a criminal, after all.
The final breaking point really was the fact that Eric never saw Yancy eat with the other egos. Usually, all of the egos ate together with a chosen few trusted to cook, aka Eric. However, Yancy never showed up, honestly Eric has never seen him get food in general. The hospitable part of him just won’t have that, not even his nervousness could compete. So he prepared a neat plate of leftovers after the egos finished dinner and made a beeline for Yancy’s room.
Whatever anxiety was still plaguing him was too late to stop him from knocking on the door. Though he was shaking slightly.
The door cracked open and Yancy peaked at his visitor. “Oh, it’s youse.” He fully opened the door with a confused expression. “Eric, yeah? Whatcha want?”
“Um, I just - just noticed that you, um…” Eric fidgeted under Yancy’s questioning gaze. “You - you weren’t at dinner so, um, I got you food.” He hastily offered the plate.
“Oh.” Yancy nodded and took the plate of - delicious looking - food. He glanced between Eric and the plate with suspicion. “Thanks, but… what’s in it for youse?”
“W-What? Nothing!” Eric said, perhaps a bit too quickly for Yancy’s taste. “I-I mean… it’s just - it’s just that… you’re never around for dinner or lunch s-so… I got worried.”
“Youse worried about me?” Yancy said softly, moreso to himself than to Eric. His heart wept as he stared at Eric’s shaking form slightly shifting side to side and keeping his gaze to the floor, no doubt worrying about a hundred things at once. He cleared his throat before he could actually cry. “Sorry ‘bout that, I usually eat later.”
Everyday on the hour. He could only eat at this time, shower at this time, sleep at this time… Over and over again. It was autopilot at this point. The other egos schedules just didn’t align with his system. The system he was conditioned with.
“It’s okay! No worries, It’s okay,” Eric reassured. “I-I can, um…” He raised a hand to grasp at his shirt collar, “I can start cooking later. If-If you want-! It’s just that you’re missing the others and stuff.”
Yancy scratched the back of his neck. “You don’t gotta worry ‘bout that. I’ll manage.”
“Oh. Oh… okay.” Eric continued to fiddle with his collar. His words kept getting stuck at the back of his throat, mind racing with a million different responses. “They’re… they’re not that scary, y’know?” he blurted out.
Yancy paused, only responding with a questioning noise. He was met with Eric finally looking up at him, doing his best to keep a determined gaze.
“I was nervous too,” he said, voice soft. Yancy found it amazing that someone could speak so quietly, so hesitantly. “I know - I know what it’s like… it’s not too bad, though.”
“Well, it’s not like that. I’m just not used to youse guys, is all.” He didn’t feel shy in the conventional sense, and certainly not to the extent of Eric’s case. It was simply abnormal. The people were too different, there were too many options… too much freedom. His brain couldn’t grasp the concept. He let out a heavy sigh as he stared at Eric’s still determined face. “You’re not gonna let this go, pipsqueak?”
Eric shook his head. He wondered if the nickname was supposed to intimidate him. People seemed to have an affinity to label him with cutesy title, so he had no clue.
“Alright, alright I’ll bite,” he huffed.
“W-Well, you don’t have to force yourself…” his voice quivered, eyebrows quirked upwards in worry. “If you wanna take your time I-I can - I can keep bringing you food here until you’re ready.”
“That’d be nice.” He nodded at Eric’s helpful words, smiling. “Thanks for the grub, pipsqueak.” Yancy reached over to ruffle Eric’s hair before he shut the door. Leaving Eric with a new job, nickname, and messed up hair.
-
There was another thing to add to Yancy’s ever changing routine. Everyday without fail, Eric went up to his room with a plate of whatever he cooked that day. As different as it was from prison food, he didn’t mind the variety for once. Besides, it wasn’t just the food he savoured.
Some days Eric stayed for a chat and they talked for hours about whatever was interesting. Or, more specifically, Yancy yammering on about prison and/or musicals and Eric listening intently, occasionally muttering thoughtful comments. Other days Eric quickly came by, dropped off his food, and bid farewell. Yancy didn’t mind either option.
He knew the others weren’t anything like Eric, but he figured he needed to join them at some point. His stomach dropped at the thought.
No, he couldn’t stay like this.
Isolation was a different type of hell altogether. Reminded him too much of solitary…
While surprised by his presence, most gave him a friendly welcome when he showed up at the kitchen table. Though it was Eric's reaction that made him give a genuine smile.
“How’s it goin’, pipsqueak?” Yancy surprised him by patting him on the shoulders while his back was turned.
Eric beamed at him. This time shaking from excitement rather than nerves. “You showed up! I-I mean - it’s good! It’s good.” He gestured to the pot of soup. “I’m… I’m almost done with this. You can, um, you wanna join the others?”
“Oh… right,” he mumbled, scratching the back of his neck as he glanced at the others. “Yeah, I guess I could…”
“Or you could… y-you could chop those potatoes for me?”
Eric smiled as Yancy’s mood instantly bounced up. “I guess can do that for youse.” Yancy cleared his throat, letting his cold guy act return once more. “Been meaning to brush up on the ol’ cooking skills anyways.” He clumsily twirled the knife and almost cut his finger.
“Pl-Please don’t get blood on them.” Eric giggled.  
“Yeah, yeah…”
The two listened to the noises of various chatter from the egos while cooking in silence. Well, it was more like Eric doing most of the work and Yancy hovering with moral support. Reminded Yancy of kitchen duty, and dear god was he awful at cooking. Eric’s polite, but insistent suggestions to leave everything to him prevented Yancy from ruining the entire meal altogether. At least he cut the potatoes alright, sloppy, but passable.
“There’s a meeting after this,” Eric said while killing the stove’s fire. “Y-You can go… if-if you want-!” he continued, wiping his hands with a towel. Not all the egos went to the meetings. Honestly Eric didn't know what happened in them, probably malicious scheming considering Dark and Wilford run them.
“Ah… well, I ain’t got anything to add.” Yancy kept scratching the back of his neck mindlessly. The instinctual gesture hit far too close to home for Eric.
“Th-That’s okay! I don’t go to them either. Tonight Bing, King, and I were… were gonna watch some movies. The - The musicals you talked about, actually!” Eric rambled on.
“Oh yeah? Youse guys got a real treat then,” Yancy hummed. He could remember all the songs off the top of his head. Most find it surprising that he knows such an extensive knowledge on these things. But hey, what else is he going to do? Be dark and brooding all the time? Sounded tiring.
“Um… do you - do you wanna join us? I mean… I know you watched them already, but - but y’know?”
This time Yancy didn’t bother hiding his excitement, shining a bright smile. “Course I can watch it with youse!”
“Oh, good!” Eric smiled back. Though after some thought he furrowed his brows. “Have… have you met Bing and King? Are you - are you alright with them?”
“Yeah theys seem alright. I ain’t got any complaints.” Yancy shrugged, ignoring that pit in his stomach for now.
“Okay, s-sorry, just making sure. I-I don’t want you to feel uncomfortable.”
Yancy smiled again, more sheepishly. “Thanks… you’s a good kid, pipsqueak.” He didn’t care that Eric was technically older, it was the thought that counts. “I’ve never dealt with a type like youse,” Yancy said with a hint of amazement. He laughed to himself as he muttered his next sentence. “Wouldn’t last a day where I’m from…”
“Wh-What…?”
“Nothin’, don’t worry ‘bout it.” A hearty pat on the back was all he reassured Eric with. Different environments, different people. A large part of him still felt out of his element. As he glanced at the talking egos, walked by the unlocked doors, and met personalities like Eric. It all violently shook him back to his reality. “We should get grub served, yeah? Come on, I’ll help ya out.”
But that doesn’t mean he’ll give up.
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purplesurveys · 5 years ago
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708
Basics
what is your best friend's full name? I’m not saying that on here since she has a very lengthy name and enumerating it here would make her too specific of a subject, but she goes by Angela.
where was he/she born? I have no idea but I’m taking a wild guess and say she was born in the city she currently lives in. Idk, she’s lived there all her life and it makes a lot of sense to think she was also born there.
where does he/she currently live? She lives in a city very near mine, but it’s already a part of Metro Manila so she technically resides in a different region.
who does he/she live with? She lives with her parents, a couple of kasambahay or house help, and her grandfather. Unfortunately her grandma, who I used to see, greet, and spend time with whenever I came over her place, just passed last Sunday.
how many pets do they have? She has two dogs, Hailey and Kennedy; but the family also has an aquarium with like 20-30 fish. Hailey is the only one allowed to walk around the house because Kennedy bites and barks. OH I just remembered they also have a lab but I don’t really get to see it a lot, and I dunno the name either.
what are the names of all of their pets? ^ Already touched on that.
how many vehicles does their family own? They have one family car. She was supposed to get her own so she can start driving herself to school, but I forgot why the plans for that fell through.
when is his/her birthday? September 15.
what colour are his/her eyes? Dark brown.
what colour is his/her hair? Black is the natural color, but she’s recently dyed it a very light brown, almost blonde shade.
how tall is your best friend? She’s a bit taller than me, probably around 5′3″ or 5′4″.
how old is he/she? 21.
how many bedrooms is in their house? Her family continues to live in the house her mom (who had a number of siblings) grew up in so they have a number of bedrooms even though her immediate family is just three people. I can remember seeing four bedrooms, but there could definitely be more.
About Your Relationship
how well do you think you know your best friend, from 0 to 10?  I’d say 8.5. She’s my best friend and I know the deeper stuff about her like her quirks, tendencies, how she’d react to something, etc. but I barely know her favorites.
what's the best moment you've had with him/her? Like I said, she’s my best friend. Honestly every time with her is a blast, and that rings much louder now that I only get to see her once every few months. The most recent most fun I’ve had with her was when we went clubbing at BGC last month til 2 AM. We’ve never really partied together before so that was a great time.
when did you meet? It was the first or second day of the first grade and since our surnames came in alphabetical order we were seated beside each other.
how long have you known him/her? 15 years in 2020.
how long have you been best friends with him/her? We’ve been best friends the same amount of time. It didn’t take long for us to get close.
how much time do you spend with him/her weekly? We don’t see each other weekly anymore as college has made us extremely busy. We do talk on Messenger a lot and I’m really thankful we have a low-maintenance friendship that doesn’t bank on having to physically be with each other all the time.
do you have a song that reminds you of your best friend? Anything by The Maine as they’re her favorite band.
do you keep secrets from each other? I don’t remember ever keeping anything from her. She knows about my secrets *a bit* *JUST A BIT* more than Gab does. If anything the only thing she doesn’t know about me is this blog.
can you be completely honest with him/her? Yes, always. She doesn’t judge and she has never flipped out on me and she’s the first one to reassure when she can tell I’m getting angsty/antsy.
Their Life
what was your best friend's happiest moment? Ooh ya got me. Probably when she and Hans got together, or maybe something related to her parents as she’s incredibly close with them.
what was your best friend's saddest moment? I can’t give you the absolute lowest point she’s had but I know she’s struggling rn with the death of her grandmother. She was also very close with her.
what job does he/she have? She doesn’t have a job for now but she’s studying to be an architect.
is your best friend married, or does he/she want to be? She’s not married but she wants to be, someday.
Does your best friend have children, or does he/she want them? No kids, but she also wants them. I wanna have nieces/nephews by her, too :(
what vehicle does your best friend have? She doesn’t have a car. Her dad drives her to and from school daily which is understandable because she lives incredibly close to UP and it’s no hassle for her dad to drive her.
what is their house like? It’s kinda like an ancestral house in that it’s been owned by several generations before her, so you can definitely see the features of vintage Filipino houses from the stairs and the windows, which they’ve remained unchanged. It’s also pretty spacious because it used to house a lot of people, which makes it a great venue for when they host parties.
Dreams
what does he/she most want to do for a job? She’s studying architecture but recently she’s come to really dislike her course, and she’s confided in me that this was no longer what she wanted to do. I figured it would still be a freshly sensitive topic to ask her what she wants to be now, so I haven’t found that out from her just yet.
where would he/she most like to visit in the world? I think Europe would be a safe guess.
what is their dream car? She had a phase where she was crazy about the Ford Ecosport cos it’s the perfect car for college students like us - not too flashy but not too tiny or lowkey either. I’m not sure if her thoughts have since changed, but yeah that’s the last thing I remember hearing from her.
what do they most want in the world? Happiness and her parents’ happiness.
if you could give your best friend anything in the world, what would it be? Right now, a giant hug.
Their Interests, Hobbies, Likes and Dislikes
what is their favourite food? I honestly have no idea. We rarely get to go on food dates. I don’t know what exactly her favorite food is, but I can say her favorite cuisine is Japanese.
what is his/her favourite colour? OMG I also don’t know. I told you I can’t tell her favorites!!!!!!!!!! :(((( WAH I’m gonna take a guess and say white? I feel bad now :((
what is his/her favourite animal? Ok this one I know - dogs.
what is his/her celebrity crush? I dunno either dude, it’s probably still one of the guys from The Maine. I know she also had a crush on Jamie Campbell Bower and Xavier Samuel at one point.
what is their favourite way to spend a day? Seeing Hans and trying out new and adventurous things with him. One of the last times I saw her she was talking about going to see Hinulugang Taktak with Hans on her BREAK which is pretty insane, considering where we go to school and where Hinulugang Taktak is.
name a few things your best friends dislikes. President Duterte, conflict, her course, stupid people.
what is/was their favourite school subject? Math and all types of it.
what is his/her favourite TV programme? Right now she’s watching Money Heist and Elite. We also share a common love for Friends and she’s the reason I got into it in the first place.
what is his/her favourite movie? I don’t know. :(
what is his/her favourite music? She used to like alternative rock/pop punk/pop rock (All Time Low, The Maine, You Me at Six, The Summer Set, We Are the In Crowd, The Cab, etc) like most teens during those days but now she’s taken a liking to pop, R&B, some indie.
name one of your best friend's favourite musical artists. THE MAINE
name one of your best friend's favourite songs. Maybe the Night by Ben&Ben.
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theysaywhatasadsight · 6 years ago
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Wedding Bells, Part One (Steve Rogers x Desi!Reader)
A/n: *Slides up to you* Good Evening (technically its morning hehe) but this fic was made possible by Amy (some may know her, she was formerly @thelazypangolin ), by @messy-random-bitch and @officially-tonynat-shrine who listened to my crazy headcanons and gave me amazing ones. @nasarogers is the clueless American I would die for (love you bby) and @shurisneakers and @chillingbucky wanted to be tagged. Technically this is a desi au, so translations are right next to the sentence and some pop culture references are in the glossary. The story is based in Delhi so if any of y’all live there don’t come for my head skkssk. (P.S.: IDK if the ‘person sitting in the lap of another person in a car’ is technically illegal here or not? Imagine my surprise when I went to Europe and found out it’s illegal there RIP. So ignore the “is this actually allowed?” question, please and thank you.
Warnings: Floof, some violence and blood, swearing (well it’s in another language)
"Agent (L/N), thoughts?" The post mission debrief was often long and complicated but this time, one of her many gods had clearly smiled upon her as it was over in an hour. Most of the junior agents had cleared out of the room, leaving behind a few of the senior ones and the director of SHIELD. "Don't let Richardson go next time; all he does is whine and make extremely bad decisions. Our job is to provide assistance to the Avengers, not to be heroes ourselves. Let's keep ourselves a bit on the down low." "Agreed." Smith piped up. There were nods around the table. "I'll talk to Richardson, push him on a desk job for a while." Everyone stood up and filled out. Walking beside Nick, YN grabbed his tablet for him. "Always working, Sir." "Unlike you, Agent (L/N). A whole month for a wedding? It's not you that's getting married is it?" He looked completely serious but she could see the glint of mischief in his eye. "What? I haven't taken a single holiday in a year. Besides,its my cousin's wedding; they're pretty close." "I suppose you're not joining us for the Islamabad mission?" "Not really, already I get called unpatriotic too much. Good luck!"
She handed off the debrief files in the Avengers' living room. A few were lazing around, some off to shower or maybe nap. She herself wanted one, not wanting to wrestle with a saree and a suitcase. "So I hear you're not showing up for the next month?" She handed the file to Natasha while Tony looked up from his phone where he was declining with Pepper and Morgan who were away to Chicago for a meeting and visiting Pepper's family. After Ultron, it was always better to have physical copies of files. "Yeah, cousin getting married." "Oooh, with the number of days you were leaving I thought it was yours." "Don't, Fury already made that joke. And besides, wouldn't I invite you lot to my hypothetical wedding?" She smiled as she sat down on the sofa next to him, grabbing an apple from the coffee table. "Considering it was Steve's wedding too I would think we would already be invited, I did call you all to mine." He smirked. Y/N nearly choked on her apple. "Wait, what?!" "Darling, we know you've been hooking up. Or planning to." Natasha sighed and glared at Tony. "So much staring at each other on missions. You always covering his ass, and might I remind you of the time he went into a coma after a mission and you nearly ripped the place apart?" "Clearly, your super senses are gone because there is nothing there. Nada. Zilch. There is absolutely no potential there. We're just colleagues." "Colleagues who hooked up once? Last new year's you two were slobbering over each other. You left Bucky and Me dancing alone to that...what was it called again?" "Sheila ki Jawani*?" "Yes! Amazing song, by the way. Movie didn't make a lick of sense but then again, which heist movie does?" Glad at the change of topic, she smiled. "Do you need more movie recommendations?" "Nope, Bucky and I still have your old list to go through." "Call me if you need explanations. Only WhatsApp calls though, I'm not shelling out a fortune to explain the reincarnation of Shanti Priya* to you."
Hungry, jet lagged and extremely fatigued she landed at the Delhi airport, hoping against hope that the crowd assembled at the pick up was for the Tik Tok star that was also on her flight and not because her whole clan hadn't seen her for 3 years. But when was she ever lucky? When she had left the army to join SHIELD everyone had been very disappointed in her. Not that any of them knew. For immediate family, she was in HR for Stark Industries and for the rest she was in 'Amreeka, doing something or the other'.
When they told her she would be sleeping alongside her younger cousin who was training to be a doctor she just sighed. The nerd would probably study the whole night and keep the light on. Maybe she could do some pending work; jet lag would keep her awake anyway. Work, yes. Work would keep her awake. Definitely not daydreaming about a pair of blue eyes that wouldn't go away; the owner of whom was the biggest fattu (coward)  she had ever seen.
He missed Y/N. It had barely been 4 days since she was gone. He should ideally know better. Fraternising among agents wasn't good. Her job would be in danger if anyone found out. He never really had a thing for rules though. "Good God, Rogers, stop moping about and give her a call." "I-what?" "Yes." Natasha frowned at him from where she was leaning against the countertop. He was crushing the cardamom, trying to figure out if it went after the chai was done or before. "Ask her when the cardamom goes in. I think it's before the whole thing boils." "I, uh, I'll look up a recipie." "Care to tell me why Steve Rogers, who loves coffee as black as his soul is trying to replicate YN's sweet as hell chai? Couldn't you get some from Starbucks?" "That's no chai,that's just tea and milk. She had it once and almost threw it at the barista's head...Nat, why are you looking at me like that?" "Nothing, nothing at all."
"They're no longer in Islamabad." "What?" "Someone leaked the details of the raid to them. They're moving it to India now, possibly to the capital. They have enough contacts to pull it off, even HYDRA's helping them." "New Delhi, isn't that where Agent (L/N) is now?" "Fury, she's on vacation; besides she's not picking up any of her calls." Natasha glared at Nick. "A radioactive gas that can take out the entire subcontinent and a dude who's not stopping at anything to further his our-return-to-the-dark-ages agenda? Pretty sure it beats all weddings. Send someone with the briefing and gather your team. We’re sorting this shit out, fast."
"No. Absolutely not. I'm not going to show up at her door asking her to cancel her family commitments and go back to work." "Really, the concern you two have for each other is extremely sweet and nauseating; but you have to do it. Get in, get recon and get back in contact. If the rumour is true we'll have to assemble the whole team." The former assassin rolled her eyes at Steve's aghast face. "I got her address off an old file; I'll ask her to pick you up. And please, don't get lost somewhere; we really don't have any spare agents to track you down." "I've been outside the States before, Widow. And using confidential information for personal purposes? Nefarious." "This is the reward I get for being a good wingwoman. Fine, don't come crying to me when you're invited to her actual wedding." As he set about packing he daydreamed about jumping off the top of the compound and wondering if his feet would still work to escape into the surrounding forest.
She got the text the minute Natasha assumed Steve's plane took off. "Your boyfriend is headed towards Delhi. Introduce him, be the black sheep you are and for the love of God read the files and make a plan." The rest was just code saying the plans had changed, the expected mission derailed. When her family began pestering her, saying that her turn at the altar was next and asking about boyfriends, she had blurted Steve's name by accident, the fact that it made a perfect cover was a different matter. That's what happens when you space out while talking to Sunita Chachi*, woman has a tongue sharper than Gordon Ramsay's knife. Her mother had just smiled sadly and asked two of YN's younger cousins to share a bed when told another guest would be joining them.
30 minutes after the plane landed he immediately wanted to go back. What he was used to was executing secret and well-coordinated missions, not the actual planning and coordinating. Sam argued he was growing soft. He just liked listening to YN's voice. And now he was in an unfamiliar land with no foreseeable end to his stay and a wedding to attend, apparently. YN smiled at him at the receiving line, smiling as a lover receiving a spouse after a long separation. She walked up to him and whispered "You're my boyfriend from work, you know zero hindi and Natasha introduced us." She embraced him and leaned forward for a kiss. It lasted shorter than he would've liked. She continued whispering as she grasped his hand and lead him to the car which already had three people in it. "Did you pick up more guests?" "Nope, they just wanted to see you first." Opening the door as Steve tossed his bag in the back she yelled something at the assembled children and got in the right. Was the kid in the front supposed to drive? "Do you need an invitation?" One of the kids yelled out.
He had judged wrong. There were not only three teenagers, there were two more kids who had been too shy to outright stare at him like their elder siblings (he assumed) had. One sat in his lap, staring outside the window. The others chose instead to glare at him unnervingly. YN drove, swearing at everything. One of the younger ones laughed at something she said and immediately had his ears covered and shushed."Didi* don't teach Gudiya bad words!"
"Arey baba sorry, tu toh janta hai traffic kitna bura hai; akele chalane ki adaat ho gayi hai bhenchod. Sorry."  (“You know how bad traffic is, I’m used to driving alone, sisterfucker” Basically the reader’s saying the traffic is the worst and how she’s used to driving alone and hence swears often while driving; also people from Delhi apparently like to attach swears to everything.)  She grinned as her cousin gasped again. She was at the moral, change-the-world stage. YN missed that.
“So, change of plans?” Pinky grinned at Y/N as she looked up from a complicated looking textbook. The kid had somehow made it to medical school without losing her mind or her calm demeanour. “I’m only gonna switch places at night, right now let me study Anatomy.”Sighing at her cousin’s confused stare, she glared back.  “Arey you’ll want to sleep next to your boyfriend na?” “Uh, yeah, I mean, thank you, but it’s no problem. I don’t want you to get in trouble because of me.” “Calm down. If we get caught sneaking around in the middle of the night its worse for the two of you. I got into MBBS, I can basically get away with murder now.” she smiled. Y/N wondered whether her cousin would be a sociopath or a leader later. She went about chalking up the updated plan for the recon, only hoping her family would behave themselves around Steve. She caught some part of her wishing it was the real thing so that the poor guy’s suffering wouldn’t be in vain.
Hey bhagwaan (oh God), I need gangajal* and a stiff drink. Also a lobotomy.
“How did that idiot even cross the border this quick? And how are we getting informed this late? This is going to be a logistical nightmare, the government is going to put the pressure on us.” “Maybe someone exposed him or he got pushed back down on the social hierarchy. It’s a mess.” On the pretense of sightseeing, Y/n had dragged Steve away from her nosy relatives to get details for the now completely changed mission. "Can I try that?" He gestured to the bowl of chaat* in her hands. "Don't cry if you find it too spicy then. You couldn't even tolerate my butter chicken; even my youngest cousin can eat that." "My tongue is really not fond of burning and not being able to taste anything for a fortnight." "Oh? What is it fond of then?" His answering blush made her smile. "I-uh, we need to report within three days, Nat is busy getting everyone together and ready for the mission." "The engagement is in 2 days! How are we even going to get out?" "How much do you like this cousin anyway?" "How. Dare. You. Rahul is one of the few I actually like." "Yeah, how many are there? I lost count at 13." She punched his arm and snorted, earning a smile from him and a glare from the chaatwala*.
YN truly regretted coming back here. The never ending taunts, the upcoming solo recon mission (that she would have to give Rahul’s engagement a miss for, he was one of her favorites too) and the fact that the guy she had been thirsting over the past few months was suddenly her so-called boyfriend. Massaging her temples as she got up to get ready, she hoped desperately the recon would not involving fighting. She already had thinning hair due to the stresses of being a S.H.I.E.L.D. agent, her hair being yanked out while pins were still attached to her hair wouldn’t help the cause.
"Mummy!" She yelled over the din of the loud, jarring music. Her mother was smiling and gossiping with her sister-in-law. "Thoda kaam aa gaya; Delhi wale office Jana padega." (Some work popped up, I’ll have to go to the Delhi office) "Itni raat ko? Uss gore ko lekar?" (So late? With the foreigner in tow?”) "Are kuch nahi hoga, bohot important hai, warna nahi jaati." (Nothing will happen. It’s too important, otherwise I wouldn’t have gone.) "Wapis aa jaiyo jaldi, raat ko ghumne safe nahi hota." (Come back quick, It's not safe to roam at night.) "Pakka." (I promise)
"MADARCHOD!" (”MOTHERFUCKER!”) She grunted as she ducked, the bullet nearly embedding in her collarbone. She fired back two shots, one at a goon's head and one at his accomplice's knees. Whipping her head at a noise, she gasped as Steve has a bullet graze him as one of them took a lucky shot at him. He only winced. The goddamn lehenga* got in the way of her running after the idiot who could run like fucking Milkha Singh* even after being shot in the knees. They both chased. The recon turned ugly after someone spotted the tent she was wearing that was pretending to be a skirt. If they somehow got out alive, she'd burn this thing. By the time she caught up to Steve, who had left her long behind, she came upon a sight that gave her a heart attack. The men (apparently some were laying in wait for them) all lay dead in various poses, with Steve in the middle grunting and struggling to get up. Firing at someone who awoke, she leaned down, cradling his head in her hands. "Steve. Hey, whoa. Don't die on me. Where are you hurt?" He was bleeding all over her skirt. "Knife to the ribs. Two or three times..may...maybe. Hurts like a bitch." "I'm getting you up. We're going home, okay?"
This was a terrible situation. Somehow supporting the huge, burly figure of an extremely injured Steve, she set him down, leaning against the bike they had zipped around on and somehow escaped on, looking for her phone in the carrier attached. She lived this bike even when she lived here; it belonged to her uncle who would give the keys to only her. The sagaai* had clearly ended an hour or so ago. People still milled about, probably the men from the tent house they had booked for the whole tamasha*. “Shobhit, neeche aa. Garden ke side. Aur Bunty aur Puneet ko bhi leke aaiyo.” (”Shobhit, come downstairs, to the garden side. Bring Bunty and Puneet with you.") “Itni raat ko kya kar rahi ho bahar? Khatam ho gaya aapka office ka kaam?” ("What are you doing out so late, is your office work done?") “Are tu neeche aa, sab samjhaati hu.” ("You come downstairs, I’ll explain everything" )
“Samjhaana agar shuru karti toh achha hota.” "It’ll be good if you start explaining now." Shobit muttered as all three of her cousins stared at the crumpled figure of Captain America on the ground, to their cousin wincing in pain, her lehenga covered with blood, again to Steve. “Isko uthake Pinky ke kamre tak jaane mei meri madad kar. Yeh marr warr gaya toh naukri gayi meri.” "Help me pick him up and take him to Pinky’s room. If he dies, I’m losing my job."
“First of all, I’m not a doctor. Yet.” Pinky also did her fair share of staring at everyone. Y/N could feel her eye twitching. Whether it was out of anger, stress, or the false eyelash that had ripped from her lash line as she drove like a madwoman in the traffic, no helmet or gloves. Steve screaming like a grandma as he held on for dear life was a tiny bit amusing though. Endearing maybe, Nope, definitely not endearing.
“I should tell you that because I have very, and I mean very little experience in sewing. Particularly sewing up bodies professionally. If he dies, I am not responsible.” She yawned once, extremely sleepy. “That being said, someone get cotton, Dettol, and uh my sewing kit is in the left front pocket of my backpack. Jija*, there’s no anesthesia, but I suppose you don’t need it, super strength and all. Didi*, aisa muh mat banao (don’t make that face), just because none of the oldies know who he is doesn’t mean we’re stupid too.” Y/N shut her gaping mouth.
“He’ll live.” Pinky said as everyone in the room collectively sighed. The suture had been painful to witness, Y/N biting her lip so hard she tasted copper. Steve seemed okay now. When he had taken that guard’s knife to the stomach, Y/N’s heart had stopped. The fear she felt, that was no general fear at seeing someone stabbed or even a friendly fear (was there even such a thing or was 3 AM her just rambling?). The panic she felt was heartbeaking. “Make those self realisation faces later, Di. I’m tired and I just want some sleep.  “Jija ko unke kamre tak chodke aa. Koi raaste mei mile bol dena bike bhid gayi thi, hospital se aate hue late ho gaya tha.” (Jija is the hindi word for sister’s husband. Pinky’s telling him to drop him to his room and if anyone asks to tell them he had an accident, the bike hit something and they were late coming from the hospital.) “Tu sabko heart attack dilayegi kya?” (Do you want to give everyone a heart attack?") “Aur koi bahana mile toh batao.” ("If you have any other excuse then tell"
As everyone scattered, Y/N shut the door to change. Her cousin just lay down on the bed, semi-asleep. She cracked one eye open when Y/N reached out her hand to switch off the light, whispering “So you are a secret agent?” “Nope, I sell veggies with Captain America.” “Ugh, way to thank me for saving your boyfriend’s life, with terrible puns.” “He’s not my...leave it. Good night. Oh, and PInky?” Pinky hummed. “Thanks.” “So jao.” (Go to Sleep)
“Tell Romanoff we’ll need backup. They clearly planned ahead for the move, the facility is impossible to get into, and now they know we’re coming. Also, Steve is injured." “Very well, we’ll invite ourselves to the wedding. Take care if your boyfriend until then."Natasha sounded worried but her tone was light. “Bring a gift, I’m not keeping strangers in my family home without payment.”
Glossary *-Sheila ki Jawani is a pretty popular Bollywood Item Song. Played at every wedding /party since 2010 *-The Reincarnation of Shanti Priya is a reference to the film Om Shanti Om where the leads get resurrected after having an unhappy ending *Chachi- Father's younger brother's wife; aka yn's aunt *Gangajal- Water from the river Ganges that Hindus consider sacred, its used for purification purposes (guess why Y/N wanted it *wink wink*) *Didi- Elder Sister *Chaat: some spicy-sweet snack, it's a general term; desis feel free to imagine your favourite. *Chaatwala: the person who owns the chaat shop *Lehenga: a crop top and floor-length skirt outfit worn at weddings and traditional functions *Milkha Singh: famous Indian athlete, also known as "The Flying Sikh" because of how fast he was. *sagaai- engagement *tamasha- a sarcastic way of saying how over the top the whole wedding is.
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imacrowcawcaw · 5 years ago
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@oblvions @shes-outta-sight @lazingonsunday @karrotkate @satans-helper thank you all for the tags 💗💕
A buttload of info about me:
Last thing I read: "Lovers" by @satans-helper 😍😍😍
Favorite Book: The Merry Adventures of Robin Hood by Howard Pyle
Favorite Movie: Beetlegeuse
Dream Date: Imagine this: a nice, plush couch, covered in down pillows and fluffy blankets. There is a fire in the brick fireplace, the wood smoke combines with the scent of Nag Champa incense and the homemade treats that cover the low table next to the couch. There are brownies, bread rolls, cheeses, bowls of fruit, dipping sauces, cakes, sandwiches - a whole feast of my favorite foods. My partner and I would cuddle up on that couch, listening to my favorite symphonies on the record player in the corner and talking for hours. This isn't really a first date thing, more like an established relationshil date, but god I'd love to just spend an afternoon surrounded with my favorite things and my favorite person.
Do I have a crush?: Not really. There are people I find very very attractive (a friend, Sam Kiszka, Duff Mckagan in his 20s, Lucy Lui) but nobody that I'm actually romantically and sexually into.
Hobbies: Swimming, observing nature, browsing Pinterest, daydreaming, writing, reading, making art, singing, listening to music, love to cook
My favorite time of day: late afternoon, right before the sun sets. I'm usually free to do what I like, the temperature starts to drop, I can watch the sun... it's nice
If I could choose what I looked like, anything, what would it be?: I want tattoos, and more piercings, I'd love to change my hair color again - it's been natural for awhile but I think I want either burgundy or bright blue. WINGS! I kind of want giant, strong fairy wings, and maybe glowing eyes, a forked tongue, and tattoos that move and change (kinda like Maui lol)
Am I romantic?: Yeah, I'd say I am. I love to treat people, friends and significant others, but I'd be especially affectionate and romantic for a partner. I'm constantly buying gifts and things that remind me of them, cooking for them, planning dates and buying tickets for things I know they like, quietly taking care of stuff I know they need to do, cuddling, complimenting... I love to shower my partner in affection 24/7
My favorite kind of weather: Late Autumn, generally. About 55ºF, cloudy but not raining, windy
What do I like to talk about?: Lol I talk a whole lot and I've probably talked about everything at some point. One of my close friends and I particularly love to debate religion, mythology, magic, history, and the intersections of those. We also regularly plan heists and crimes lmao
My turn-ons: Long eyelashes, pouty lips, dirty hands (motor oil, paint, flour, etc), sarcasm, seeing someone get excited about something, compassion, casual physical affection
My turn-offs: Nastiness without a reason, knees (I just think knees look weird idk), Trump supporters, 100% pessimism (I understand being depressed or doubtful or being generally a pessimist, but if you adamantly refuse to see anything in a good light and try to ruin it for others f u c k y o u)
If I got a tattoo, what would it be and where?: ohhh I want tattoos so bad but I'm saving up and I'm not certain about some yet.... but I know that I'm getting a tree of life matching with my mom, I want mushrooms, pine trees, lavender, wildflowers (all for personal reasons). I'd also like to make maybe a charm bracelet of sorts with little charms for my favorite bands, books, movies, and other peices of media. I know that interests change and I might not like something in 30 years, but I see my life in periods of interests and I want to catalogue the things that shaped me
My pets: I have 3 cats - Pumpkin Pie, Lady, and Sweetheart
My dream job: I just want to live a free life doing what I want. I want to grow my own food for the most part, and raise animals, and paint, and write, and play music, and go on random adventures, go antiquing, decorate my home from my travels, learn without expectations - I don't want to exchange a fulfilling life for financial security from some mundane modern job.
My dream place to live: Secluded, in the forests of Oregon (or maybe Pennsylvania idk) on the bottom third of a mountain, on my own little farm
My dream vacation: I just wanna go explore historical landmarks and buildings
My dream house: A beautiful historical house -- like an 1870s American farmhouse, or a craftsman cottage, or a Victorian painted Lady, or maybe a New York brownstone -- filled with antiques and records and books and artifacts that I've collected. I LOVE antiques so much, everything would be of fine craftsmanship, it would be lavish and inviting and packed with interesting items at every turn (I want my house to be a curios shop lol) I also want a big ass kitchen and nice woodwork, I literally get horny over original built ins
My piercings: Sadly, I only have my standard ear piercings right now, but I think I'll get more soon. A nose ring, eye brow bar (yes I know that's so 2000s but I like them), probably 4 more on each ear, navel, nipples
If I had kids, what would I name them?: I love older, interesting names, so - Euphemia, Hartford, Monroe, Malory, Louise (me lol), August, Fredrick
My worst traits: I'm incredibly stubborn; I love talking to people but I'm awkward; lazy and don't care; I'm a bit of a collector/hoarder; I bottle up any anger or sadness I feel so I don't inconvenience others
My best traits: I love to give and help; I try to make people comfortable around me/in my home; I have excellent taste; I appreciate quality, culture, and creativity; I have many interesting interests that I'm eager to share and learn more about; I'm very creative
My worst fear: a painful death - I'm not afraid of dying, even though I'd rather not, I just don't want it to hurt
What do I want to eat right now?: Well, considering that I just ate my first bit of solid food in 3 days and immediately had to run to the bathroom... nothing
My favorite vacation memory: *blushes* my first kiss AND nearly my first time (we went like halfway): making out with this dude, son of my mom's friend, at my family cabin
My favorite city: I really don't know. Timber, OR, let's say
My favorite social media platform: Tumblr or Pinterest (does that count?)
My favorite article of clothing: My leather motorcycle jacket. I can't actually ride a motorcycle (trying to remedy that because *sexy*) but I got it a few years ago and it makes me feel so fucking badass. It's heavy, about 15 pounds of good quality leather, has lots of secret pockets in the lining and some cool looking zippers and studs, but nothing crazy. It's hella warm and comfy, I wear it everyday it's cold enough to
Do I play any sports?: pfft no. I like to swim, and I'm interested in baseball and tennis, but I suck at them and also I just don't like team sports
My favorite meal: What I order when I go to Buffalo Bills - a pesto/feta/mozzarella/Italian sausage/basil/tomato/garlic pizza, with homemade potato chips and chunky blue cheese dressing for dipping. If I had room, I'd finish with Marionberry cheesecake pie from Sherri's (but I am incredibly sick and have no faith in getting better enough so I feel like I'll never be able to eat like this again)
What am I excited for?: The winter holidays! I'm atheist, so Christmas is all about the personal stuff and non religious family traditions for me. I love the decorations, the music, seeing my family, baking, giving and receiving presents, it's all just so fun
What am I not excited for?: Cleaning my room, it really really needs it though. Also just continuing to live like this. I'm not suicidal, I'm just in a lot of pain constantly and I don't know what to do
When was the last time I cried?: an hour or so ago, I'm in loads of pain right now
What is something I hate about the world?: There's too much to choose from
What is something I love about the world?: children and nature
My favorite scents: vanilla, lavender, pine, Nag Champa incense, BBQ meat, pizza with basil, rosemary, my Dad's cologne
Cats or dogs?: kitties 💗
What kind of sleeper am I?: A weird one lol. I can't lay on my stomach for more than 15 minutes without it making me incredibly nauseous for the rest of the day, but it's also my favorite way to sleep cause its comfy somehow... I can't lay on my back without a pillow either, 30 seconds in and the nerves pinch so bad I'm screaming. I snore, and I sleep deep, but it takes a long time to fall asleep and usually only beeping or banging noises wake me up??? Like I said, I sleep weird
How long would I survive in a zombie apocalypse?: I really don't know. I have some skills and the drive to learn to fight, but I am currently, as I'm sure y'all can tell, very sick and I don't think I'd be able to live with so much movement and so little medicine
Am I trusting?: Generally, I probably trust too much but I'm not gonna stop
What fictional characters do I identify with?: there are many I like but none I identify with
My most common labels: Mom friend, butch, that weird fat chick (doesn't bother me tho), the well behaved daughter, old soul
My life's anthem: I really am not sure if this is a good anthem song but I love it so so much... Take Me In Your Arms (Rock Me A Little While) by Kim Weston - you see where I get my love of long titles lol
Problems I'm dealing with: my health and whatever painful sickness is wrecking me, figuring out what to do with my life, saving money, getting my anxiety under control, getting the house to actually heat up because I'm cold as fuck
How can someone win me over?: let me express my interests and feelings, show kindness, be funny
What is something people don't know about me?: Idk
Not tagging anyone, this took over an hour
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missytearex · 6 years ago
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Happy fanworks appreciation day! Now, I know WIPs aren’t exactly everybody’s cup of tea, BUT I actually love them. I love the excitement of waking up to a new chapter that’s been posted and feeling like I’m a part of something while it’s happening. So, if any of you feel the same way, or if you see something amazing and you just can’t help yourself, go check them out and give them a chance!
Please note that this is by no means a comprehensive list. I’m only including works that I have come across and am either currently reading or want to read at some point.
✏️ Kiss Me Deadly by @13ways-of-looking, @twopoppies
larry | not rated — 5/20
The world’s most ingenious art thief has committed a series of heists, replacing world-famous masterpieces with forgeries. Harry Styles, an FBI agent straight out of training, happens to have a fine art degree and a bum knee. When Harry is sent to Miami with his FBI mentor to break the case, he meets a real estate agent who deals in more than condominiums, and comes face to face with a gorgeous surfer, the human equivalent of an unridable superbreak— the devilishly clever, incomparably hot Louis Tomlinson.
✏️ Need by @dimpled-halo
larry | 7k so far | explicit — 2/?
After another world tour, Harry can’t wait to get home to Louis and finally begin their wedding preparations. Louis’ got his hands full, on the verge of signing a new artist and having to deal with someone he thought he’d erased from his past. With all the stress trying to get the best of Louis, he’s in need of a little help.
Help only Harry can provide.
✏️ Out of Paradise by @whimsicule
larry | 21k so far | mature — 1/3
scotland yard inspector styles travels to berlin in the winter of 1924, chasing defector liam payne and a suspected network of communist radicals. faced with open hostility from his german counterparts, it is far too easy to fall into the city’s nefarious nightlife and give in to a part of himself he’d vowed to lock away forever. 
✏️ Almost In Your Arms by @goldbootsandvans
larry | 24k so far | explicit — 3/?
It’s 1953, and Louis Tomlinson is a household name after winning two Academy Awards in his career. Now he’s about to star in his first period piece: Hadrian, the story of the gay Roman Emperor. He has one rule, though, and that is to never get involved with another actor. That rule gets hard to follow when he starts to fall for his love interest in the film, and even harder when they’re put into a publicity relationship.
✏️ Your Life Worth Walking on a Bright Morning by @helloamhere
larry | 24k so far | explicit — 5/?
For all its complexity, Louis sometimes reminded himself, life could always be simplified into a series of forks in the road. Even overwhelmingly big things were survivable when you broke them down to their choice. One path or the other, left or right.
✏️ The Blood of Words by @mediawhorefics
larry | 33k so far | mature — 3/?
Louis Tomlinson hasn’t sworn off relationships per se. He just doesn’t think he’s quite ready for one yet, despite his therapist’s encouragements. He’s comfortable in his position as editor for Styles Publishing and he’s happy to focus on his career while he gives himself more time to heal.
Enter his CEO’s brother, a boxer with a heart of gold who is determined to carve himself a space in Louis’ life and, more importantly, his heart.
✏️ Tied Down by @ham-palpert
larry | 39k so far | explicit — 5/6
The most interesting case in Liam and Niall’s careers falls directly into their laps, courtesy of an epic fuck-up of one Harry Styles, partner to the almost-infamous drug dealer Louis Tomlinson. The investigation yields an unexpected yet satisfactory outcome for Liam and Niall. For Harry and Louis, however, things are far more complicated.
✏️ A Fantastic Wreck by @13ways-of-looking​
larry | 40k so far | explicit — 3/8
Prince Louis William Tomlinson, heir to the Kingdom of Doncaster, has arrived in Rome to make an important announcement— his betrothal to Princess Eleanor of Anesidora, whom he barely knows. His grandfather, King William, lies gravely ill, and the country’s fate is in his hands.
What harm could it possibly be to leave the embassy for one day? Prince Louis has never fallen in love, mainly because he has a secret that cannot be disclosed. He’s never even had a proper kiss.
When he bumps into a journalist named Harry Styles, their mutual attraction is undeniable. But Harry, too, has a secret.
A WIP based on the movie “Roman Holiday,” starring Audrey Hepburn and Gregory Peck.
✏️ Harry Styles Cooks… by @magicalrocketships
larry | 46k so far | explicit — 14/?
In which Louis Tomlinson can’t cook, there’s a very special shower curtain, and Harry Styles used to be a baker.
Or: Louis owns all of Harry Styles’ cookbooks, and he never intends to cook a single thing out of any of them.
✏️ cut your teeth on my heart by @turnyourankle
larry | 48k so far | explicit — 4/6
Louis has worked as a security officer for years, but he’s handed his first opportunity to be team lead. The assignment is nothing like what he expected.
Harry has spent years trying to distance himself from the pressure of the Twist name and legacy. But it’s going to be hard to avoid when his mum hires him a bodyguard.
✏️ Starry, Starry Night by @goodmorningtoyouuniverse
larry | 54k so far | not rated — 16/20
AU where Harry’s getting a degree in fine arts but he’s always envied street artists their freedom and the thrill coming from illegal activity. One day, he notices a particular graffiti and decides to paint into it. Louis does graffiti. One day, somebody starts messing with his murals.
✏️ Best of me by niamcuddles
niam | 82k so far | explicit — 8/?
Though Niall’s life as a single father of a 6-year-old is stressful and completely exhausting, he still wouldn’t trade it in for the world. Between trying to juggle new jobs, a social life and spending enough time with his daughter, a love life is the very last thing on his mind. And yet somehow all of it seems to connect.
(Or where Niall’s daughter is a huge fan of Liam Payne, an international popstar, and Niall just wants her to be happy.)
✏️ An Illusion in Time by @sadaveniren
larry | 106k so far | explicit — 11/18
Louis wakes up in a bedroom that isn’t his own, next to a person he doesn’t know. It doesn’t take him long to find out he isn’t in the right year either; he’s five years in the future.
✏️ Than A Man Swear He Loves Me by @magicalrocketships
tomlinshaw | 129k so far | explicit — 8/?
The first time Louis had kissed Nick Grimshaw, Louis had been dressed as God, he’d never wanted anything so much in his life, and he’d never hated himself more for giving into it.
That part at least hadn’t changed.
Or: Nick and Louis like each other, but sometimes that’s not enough.
✏️ You Were Made To Be Mine by @chloehl10
larry | 532k so far | explicit — 81/?
Louis Tomlinson takes his 6 year old son Jacob to see Harry Styles in concert. Jacob has been a huge fan of Harry’s for as long as he can remember, so it’s a dream come true when Harry notices him in the pit. But Jacob isn’t all that Harry has his eye on…
Louis is a bit embarrassed when Harry picks on him from the stage, but when he’s invited backstage after the show, he wonders what Harry Styles could possibly want with a single dad and his kid from Manchester…
Remember to leave kudos + comments to show your appreciation!
More lists here.
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vagrantblvrd · 6 years ago
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Skies So Blue (1/1)
Summary: There’s always a problem when it comes to the crew.
Always.
Said problems range from minor inconveniences like a diet eCola shortage in the penthouse to life-threatening injuries. (Sometimes one leads to the other because the ones with an addiction to the stuff are certifiable, but that’s another problem altogether.)
Notes: An Anon wanted my thoughts on this GTA V video. :D?
(Read on AO3)
There’s always a problem when it comes to the crew.
Always.
Said problems range from minor inconveniences like a diet eCola shortage in the penthouse to life-threatening injuries. (Sometimes one leads to the other because the ones with an addiction to the stuff are certifiable, but that’s another problem altogether.)
The current problem is that Geoff’s out of town for business and he took both Alfredo and Matt, arguably the last two sane members of the crew left besides Trevor himself. And while Trevor is in charge these days, you wouldn’t notice by the way they act.
(Geoff warned him though, when he and Lindsay handed the reins over. Told him all about how they were horrible human beings and, “God have mercy on your soul, because the bastard sure as hell had none for mine,” and left for what he insisted was a long overdue vacation from the crew. Lindsay had laughed as she patted him on the cheek with a “You poor, stupid bastard,” before going off to rain chaos on the unsuspecting now she was free to do so.)
Geoff is out of town, the crew treats Trevor like a substitute teacher in an 80s/early 90s movie, and to make matters worse? It’s been a while since the crew’s pulled a heist or a job that requires more than the bare minimum from them.
They’re bored.
They’re bored and Trevor’s learned that a bored Fake AH Crew is a dangerous Fake AH Crew because they make their own entertainment.
While some good things have come out of their shenanigans in the past – improved team morale for starters – said shenanigans also draw unwanted attention from local law enforcement that’s no good for future plans they may have.
So.
“You...want me to kidnap you.”
Trevor grins, nice and friendly and holds up the wad of cash he’s offering as payment to a fine young gentleman.
New enough to Los Santos that he hasn’t heard (too much) about the Fakes aside from a few key points. (Big crew, don’t fuck with them or you’ll be sorry, yaddah, yaddah, yaddah.)
Hasn’t heard about their more outrageous exploits or what they like to do to blow off steam for their own enrichment. (Pack of idiots rolling a pumpkin around their enclosure and all.)
Most importantly, he’s just stupid enough, greedy enough, to be blinded to the amount of money Trevor’s offering for an afternoon of driving him around.
“Well I mean,” Trevor says, goes a little singsong. “’Kidnap’ is such an ugly word, you know. All these connotations to it. No, no.”
Goodness no.
“I want you to steal a car for me.”
The guy – Frank? Jimmy? Trevor doesn't remember, and if he’s being honest with himself, he doesn’t care.
See, Trevor asked around, got a short list of potential candidates for this little task that might need a reminder of how things work in Los Santos. A quick little tutorial for the ones new to town like this fine fellow who’s already ruffled a few feathers.
“...The car you will be in,” Lyle? Kyle? says, nice and slow, like he’s solving one of the world’s greatest mysteries. “That one.”
Trevor tips his head to the side.
“If you don’t want to earn some pocket money, I can always find someone else who will,” Trevor says.
Because Los Santos.
Chock full of people like this one.
The guy squints at Trevor.
Big guy. Somewhat imposing, if you happen to be easily imposed. Nose that’s been broken at least once and rough around the edges (aren’t they all, though?). Scruff going on to make him seem older and admirably suspicious because it is an odd request.
“What’s the catch?”
Trevor doesn’t mean to laugh, but he does.
“Oh, you know,” he says, big, big smile. “The usual.”
========
Gerald, Trevor’s going to call him Gerald, takes the offer.
“Sure, why the fuck not?”
It’s a lot of money just to steal a car, and Trevor was reliably informed Gerald would do just about anything for the right price.
Sold a lot of people out for less, or so Trevor’s heard. Has a habit of screwing over his partners and so on and Trevor is delighted the man’s greed has gotten the better of him yet once again. Makes having to send one of the others to pay him a little visit unnecessary later.
Birds and stones, and a delicious touch of karma because some of the people Gerald’s fucked over were theirs and that simply won’t do.
Gerald doesn’t seem to have caught on just yet, but Trevor’s sure he’ll figure it out along the way.
========
There are rules to this, of course.
The others may use any and all vehicles at their disposal, but weapons aren’t allowed.
If, for example, one of them were to get their hands on a Lazer from Zancudo, they’re not allowed to use missiles (homing or otherwise) or the cannons. (If they get their hands on tank, just. No.)
Gerald is likewise forbidden from using weapons. In case he were to get ideas, what with Trevor riding along in the backseat of their vehicle and all. (Trevor’s wearing his favorite clothes and would just hate to get blood on them.)
Other than that, it’s a free-for-all, which in Trevor’s experience always goes smoothly with this bunch.
========
“Oh, my,” Trevor says, watching a Cargobob overshoot them. “That was a close one, wasn’t it.”
Gerald swears, anger and something like panic creeping into his voice and for good reason. The crew is out in force today, Cargobobs overhead and stolen police cars behind. A generous smattering of other stolen vehicles all over the place and they’ve only been at this for twenty, thirty minutes at the outside.
Very dramatic, all of it.
Pulse-pounding adventure and danger. High-speed chases and the car’s engine is making this distressing noise, smoke coming from its engine.
Trevor waves as an SUV goes screaming past, and snaps a picture with his phone – it’s bound to turn out blurry and out of focus, but he’s sure Jeremy will appreciate the thought behind it.
“What the fuck is wrong with you people?” Gerald demands as he puts their poor car in reverse, aiming for a side street they passed. “I mean, seriously. What the fuck?”
Trevor grins and takes a picture of Gerald as he scowls at Trevor in the rearview.
For memories.
“Creative types,” he says, which isn’t stretching the truth at all. The others come up with the most...inventive heists and all sorts of shenanigans. “Wacky.”
========
After the Tank incident several years back, about the time Trevor got dragged into the madness that is the Fake AH Crew, they’re forbidden from bringing a tank into the city.
APCs and the like, however, are not tanks.
“Holy shit,” Gerald whispers, the very image of a broken man. “Holy shit.”
Trevor hmms, and checks to make sure his seat-belt is secure.
“Indeed,” he agrees, and it’s such a shame he ran out of physical room on his phone for videos because their tiny little car facing a line of Brickades is a stunning sight.
Gerald makes this noise in the back of his throat, and Trevor can see the moment he throws all caution to the wind and has his fuck it, what the fuck moment as he puts his foot to the pedal and they shoot forward.
While there are several Brickades present, there aren’t enough to create an effective blockade. More to intimidate than anything else, and Gerald squeezes their car through the narrow gap left open to them with inches to spare. (At least two, possibly three.)
========
There’s a small flock of drones buzzing around them and a Terrorbyte bearing down on them at the other end of the runway. (Not great odds, but Gerald is proving to be quite resourceful or just incredibly lucky.)
“Are those goddamned blimps?”
There’s also a parachute in the air, and by the rainbow pattern it has to be Gavin.
“They’re faster than you’d think,” Trevor says, “and surprisingly maneuverable.”
He smiles, bland little thing, when Gerald gives him an incredulous look.
========
“Why the hell do you people have so many vehicles?”
Trevor glances up from his phone.
“Sorry, what?” he asks, and Gerald repeats himself with a skosh more emphasis this time.
Trevor shrugs, glancing out his window at the freight train they're keeping pace with, occasional flashes of color as the others tries to land on one of the flatcars. They look like dolphins swimming alongside ye olde sailing ships.
Beautiful and graceful even in failure.
They’re being (gently) herded back to Los Santos, although Gerald seems to think he’s still in control of their destination and not the other way around.
“Well I mean,” he says, and shrugs again. “Nice things.”
Shiny, shiny things. Like a kid in a candy store, his crew. See something flashy, shiny and have to have it. Come up with an idea for a heist to get their hands on it or some form of shenanigans or what have you.
Gerald stares at him in the rearview mirror as though he’s realized they’re all a bunch of lunatics.
========
Like all good things, this merry little chase Gerald’s been leading the others must end.
Unlike all good things, it ends with a blockade created with a handy-dandy rocket launcher, several parked cars, and a crashed ultralight as several Cargobobs hover overhead. (They really do love their Cargobobs.)
Also, Ryan hauling poor Gerald out of the driver’s seat where he’s in the process of beating the everloving shit out of him.
Trevor can’t hear whatever Ryan’s telling Gerald as he teaches him a lesson using violence – he’d be a terrible teacher – but he can guess.
Winces as Ryan drags Gerald in for one last doozy of a punch before dropping his unconscious body to the ground, shoulders heaving a little from exertion. Sees Ryan take a moment to compose himself before he makes his way back to the battered car that’s somehow survived the day’s activities.
He unlocks the door and smiles up at Ryan when he wrenches it open like a brute.
“Hello, Ryan,” he says, bright and cheerful. Flattens a hand against his chest and bats his eyes up at the strong, burly man who rescued him from the clutches of the vile kidnapper. Says, with a terrible Southern accent, “My hero.”
Ryan stares at him for a long, long moment, and then he sighs.
All dramatic about it too, the way Geoff gets sometimes as though life is an endless bout of pain and suffering and woe is him, woe is him.
“I hate you,” Ryan says, matter-of-fact, just a simple little declaration.
Trevor smiles.
“I’m sure you do,” he says. Tips his head to the side. “But the real question is, are you still bored?”
There’s a (literal) trail of crashed and ruined vehicles behind them marking the meandering path Gerald took and who knows how much in property damage.
Chaos, panic, and so on. (Par for the course for them.)
Ryan opens his mouth, and pauses.
Unconsciously mirrors Trevor by tipping his head the opposite direction as he considers Trevor’s question. Makes this annoyed sound when he finds his answer.
“...No,” he admits.
Trevor beams at him.
“Well there you go, then!” he says.
The crew had an exciting day and Gerald got his comeuppance for fucking over one of theirs. (Most likely he hasn’t connected the dots, but if he hasn’t there’s always next time.)
“You’re a lunatic,” Ryan says, as though a sane man would be in Trevor’s position with the crew.
Trevor laughs, because yes, but also -
“Thank you, Mr. Vagabond. I’ll take that as a compliment.”
Ryan snorts and steps back to let Trevor out of the poor battered car that’s somehow survived everything they threw at it today.
Trevor looks around at the destruction, random people gawking far too close for their own safety. Looks up, and smiles at the Cargobobs circling the area.
The lone Frogger, because Lindsay.
Back down at Ryan who’s got his hand pressed to his earpiece as he talks to the others to let them know Trevor’s “mugger” has been neutralized and Trevor himself is unharmed and so on and so forth.
He feels something a lot like fondness as Ryan keeps shooting him these little looks, giving that up t some point to stand beside him. Shoulder touching Trevor’s because then at least, he’ll have some warning if Trevor slips away to start a bonus round to their little game.
Overhead one of the Cargobobs separates from the pack and looks for a good place to land to ferry them back to the penthouse, and the faint sound of sirens sound in the distance.
Good old LSPD and various emergency services leaping into action now that the Fake AH Crew has finished another one of their games and it’s safe for people to come out to deal with the mess left behind. It’s an odd agreement, understanding, they have, because this kind of game isn’t about body counts the LSPD’s learned it’s better in the long run if the crew get to have their fun.
Trevor laughs at the absurdity of it all because they’re all a little mad here, aren’t they? Keeps things interesting.
“Madman,” Ryan says with a little shake of his head and something like amusement in his voice. “Let’s go home.”
Well, the penthouse, really.
Celebratory drinks, and takeout set to embellished recounting of the day’s adventures. Plans for future rounds with a few tweaks thrown in, and this overall sense of accomplishment on Trevor’s part because the damn pumpkin worked.
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quietya · 6 years ago
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31 Days of quietYA: Books for Fans of Time Travel
If time travel is your thing, then I’ve got some good news for you - there’s a lot of it in YA. Some of these aren’t actually/strictly time travel, but you’ll get the gist. 
Loop by Karen Akins
At a school where Quantum Paradox 101 is a required course and history field trips are literal, sixteen year-old time traveler Bree Bennis excels…at screwing up. After Bree botches a solo midterm to the 21st century by accidentally taking a boy hostage (a teensy snafu), she stands to lose her scholarship. But when Bree sneaks back to talk the kid into keeping his yap shut, she doesn't go back far enough. The boy, Finn, now three years older and hot as a solar flare, is convinced he's in love with Bree, or rather, a future version of her that doesn't think he's a complete pain in the arse. To make matters worse, she inadvertently transports him back to the 23rd century with her. Once home, Bree discovers that a recent rash of accidents at her school are anything but accidental. Someone is attacking time travelers. As Bree and her temporal tagalong uncover seemingly unconnected clues—a broken bracelet, a missing data file, the art heist of the millennium—that lead to the person responsible, she alone has the knowledge to piece the puzzle together. Knowledge only one other person has. Her future self. But when those closest to her become the next victims, Bree realizes the attacker is willing to do anything to stop her. In the past, present, or future.
Crewel by Gennifer Albin
Incapable. Awkward. Artless. That’s what the other girls whisper behind her back. But sixteen-year-old Adelice Lewys has a secret: She wants to fail. Gifted with the ability to weave time with matter, she’s exactly what the Guild is looking for, and in the world of Arras, being chosen to work the looms is everything a girl could want. It means privilege, eternal beauty, and being something other than a secretary. It also means the power to manipulate the very fabric of reality. But if controlling what people eat, where they live, and how many children they have is the price of having it all, Adelice isn’t interested. Not that her feelings matter, because she slipped and used her hidden talent for a moment. Now she has one hour to eat her mom’s overcooked pot roast. One hour to listen to her sister’s academy gossip and laugh at her dad’s jokes. One hour to pretend everything’s okay. And one hour to escape. Because tonight, they’ll come for her.
Future Shock by Elizabeth Briggs
Elena Martinez has street smarts, the ability for perfect recall, and a deadline: if she doesn’t find a job before she turns eighteen, she’ll be homeless. But then she gets an unexpected offer from Aether Corporation, the powerful Los Angeles tech giant. Along with four other recruits—Adam, Chris, Trent, and Zoe—Elena is being sent on a secret mission to bring back data from the future. All they have to do is get Aether the information they need, and the five of them will be set for life. It’s an offer Elena can’t refuse. But something goes wrong when the time travelers arrive in the future. And they are forced to break the only rule they were given—not to look into their own fates. Now they have twenty-four hours to get back to the present and find a way to stop a seemingly inevitable future—and a murder—from happening. But changing the timeline has deadly consequences too. Who can Elena trust as she fights to save her life?
The Wood by Chelsea Bobulski
When Winter’s dad goes missing during his nightly patrol of the wood, it falls to her to patrol the time portals and protect the travelers who slip through them. Winter can't help but think there's more to her dad's disappearance than she's being told. She soon finds a young man traveling in the wood named Henry who knows more than he should. He believes if they can work together to find his missing parents, they could discover the truth about Winter’s dad. The wood is poisoned, changing into something sinister—torturing travelers lost in it. Winter must put her trust in Henry in order to find the truth and those they’ve lost.
Cold Summer by Gwen Cole
Kale Jackson has spent years trying to control his time-traveling ability but hasn’t had much luck. One day he lives in 1945, fighting in the war as a sharpshooter and helplessly watching soldiers—friends—die. Then the next day, he’s back in the present, where WWII has bled into his modern life in the form of PTSD, straining his relationship with his father and the few friends he has left. Every day it becomes harder to hide his battle wounds, both physical and mental, from the past. When the ex-girl-next-door, Harper, moves back to town, thoughts of what could be if only he had a normal life begin to haunt him. Harper reminds him of the person he was before the PTSD, which helps anchor him to the present. With practice, maybe Kale could remain in the present permanently and never step foot on a battlefield again. Maybe he can have the normal life he craves. But then Harper finds Kale’s name in a historical article—and he’s listed as a casualty of the war. Kale knows now that he must learn to control his time-traveling ability to save himself and his chance at a life with Harper. Otherwise, he’ll be killed in a time where he doesn’t belong by a bullet that was never meant for him.
Until We Meet Again by Renee Collins
Cassandra craves drama and adventure, so the last thing she wants is to spend her summer marooned with her mother and stepfather in a snooty Massachusetts shore town. But when a dreamy stranger shows up on their private beach claiming it's his own—and that the year is 1925—she is swept into a mystery a hundred years in the making. As she searches for answers in the present, Cassandra discovers a truth that puts their growing love—and Lawrence's life—into jeopardy. Desperate to save him, Cassandra must find a way to change history…or risk losing Lawrence forever.
Tempest by Julie Cross
The year is 2009. Nineteen-year-old Jackson Meyer is a normal guy… he's in college, has a girlfriend… and he can travel back through time. But it's not like the movies — nothing changes in the present after his jumps, there's no space-time continuum issues or broken flux capacitors — it's just harmless fun. That is… until the day strangers burst in on Jackson and his girlfriend, Holly, and during a struggle with Jackson, Holly is fatally shot. In his panic, Jackson jumps back two years to 2007, but this is not like his previous time jumps. Now he's stuck in 2007 and can't get back to the future. Desperate to somehow return to 2009 to save Holly but unable to return to his rightful year, Jackson settles into 2007 and learns what he can about his abilities. But it's not long before the people who shot Holly in 2009 come looking for Jackson in the past, and these "Enemies of Time" will stop at nothing to recruit this powerful young time-traveler. Recruit… or kill him. Piecing together the clues about his father, the Enemies of Time, and himself, Jackson must decide how far he's willing to go to save Holly… and possibly the entire world.
Traveler by L.E. DeLano
Jessa has spent her life dreaming of other worlds and writing down stories more interesting than her own, until the day her favorite character, Finn, suddenly shows up and invites her out for coffee. After the requisite nervous breakdown, Jessa learns that she and Finn are Travelers, born with the ability to slide through reflections and dreams into alternate realities. But it’s not all steampunk pirates and fantasy lifestyles—Jessa is dying over and over again, in every reality, and Finn is determined that this time, he’s going to stop it…This Jessa is going to live.
A Kiss in Time by Alex Flinn
Talia fell under a spell...Jack broke the curse. I was told to beware the accursed spindle, but it was so enchanting, so hypnotic... I was looking for a little adventure the day I ditched my tour group. But finding a comatose town, with a hot-looking chick asleep in it, was so not what I had in mind. I awakened in the same place but in another time—to a stranger's soft kiss. I couldn't help kissing her. Sometimes you just have to kiss someone. I didn't know this would happen. Now I am in dire trouble because my father, the king, says I have brought ruin upon our country. I have no choice but to run away with this commoner! Now I'm stuck with a bratty princess and a trunk full of her jewels...The good news: My parents will freak! Think you have dating issues? Try locking lips with a snoozing stunner who turns out to be 316 years old. Can a kiss transcend all—even time?
Invictus by Ryan Graudin
Farway Gaius McCarthy was born outside of time. The son of a time-traveling Recorder from 2354 AD and a gladiator living in Rome in 95 AD, Far's birth defies the laws of nature. Exploring history himself is all he's ever wanted, and after failing his final time-traveling exam, Far takes a position commanding a ship with a crew of his friends as part of a black market operation to steal valuables from the past. But during a heist on the sinking Titanic, Far meets a mysterious girl who always seems to be one step ahead of him. Armed with knowledge that will bring Far's very existence into question, she will lead Far and his team on a race through time to discover a frightening truth: History is not as steady as it seems.
The Square Root of Summer by Harriet Reuter Hapgood
Gottie H. Oppenheimer is losing time. Literally. When the fabric of the universe around her seaside town begins to fray, she's hurtled through wormholes to her past: To last summer, when her grandfather Grey died. To the afternoon she fell in love with Jason, who wouldn't even hold her hand at the funeral. To the day her best friend Thomas moved away and left her behind with a scar on her hand and a black hole in her memory. Although Grey is still gone, Jason and Thomas are back, and Gottie's past, present, and future are about to collide—and someone's heart is about to be broken.
The Girl From Everywhere by Heidi Heilig
Nix has spent her entire life aboard her father’s ship, sailing across the centuries, across the world, across myth and imagination. As long as her father has a map for it, he can sail to any time, any place, real or imagined: nineteenth-century China, the land from One Thousand and One Nights, a mythic version of Africa. Along the way they have found crewmates and friends, and even a disarming thief who could come to mean much more to Nix. But the end to it all looms closer every day. Her father is obsessed with obtaining the one map, 1868 Honolulu, that could take him back to his lost love, Nix’s mother. Even though getting it—and going there—could erase Nix’s very existence. For the first time, Nix is entering unknown waters. She could find herself, find her family, find her own fantastical ability, her own epic love. Or she could disappear.
The Love That Split the World by Emily Henry
Natalie’s last summer in her small Kentucky hometown is off to a magical start…until she starts seeing the “wrong things.” At first, they’re just momentary glimpses—her front door is red instead of its usual green, there’s a pre-school where the garden store should be. But then her whole town disappears for hours, fading away into rolling hills and grazing buffalo, and Nat knows something isn’t right. That’s when she gets a visit from the kind but mysterious apparition she calls “Grandmother,” who tells her: “You have three months to save him.” The next night, under the stadium lights of the high school football field, she meets a beautiful boy named Beau, and it’s as if time just stops and nothing exists. Nothing, except Natalie and Beau.
Proof of Forever by Lexa Hillyer
Before: It was the perfect summer of first kisses, skinny-dipping, and bonfires by the lake. Joy, Tali, Luce, and Zoe knew their final summer at Camp Okahatchee would come to an end, but they swore they’d stay friends. After: Now, two years later, their bond has faded along with those memories. Then: That is, until the fateful flash of a photo booth camera transports the four of them back in time, to the summer they were fifteen—the summer everything changed. Now: The girls must recreate the past in order to return to the present. As they live through their second-chance summer, the mystery behind their lost friendship unravels, and a dark secret threatens to tear the girls apart all over again. Always: Summers end. But this one will change them forever.
Prada and Prejudice by Mandy Hubbard
Fifteen-year-old Callie buys a pair of real Prada pumps to impress the cool crowd on a school trip to London. Goodbye, Callie the clumsy geek-girl, hello popularity! But before she knows what’s hit her, Callie wobbles, trips, conks her head...and wakes up in the year 1815!
She stumbles about until she meets the kind-hearted Emily, who takes Callie in, mistaking her for a long-lost friend. Sparks soon fly between Callie and Emily’s cousin, Alex, the maddeningly handsome - though totally arrogant - Duke of Harksbury. Too bad he seems to have something sinister up his ruffled sleeve...
From face-planting off velvet piano benches and hiding behind claw-foot couches to streaking through the estate halls wearing nothing but an itchy blanket, Callie’s curiosity about Alex creates all kinds of trouble.
But the grandfather clock is ticking on her 19th Century shenanigans. Can Callie save Emily from a dire engagement, win a kiss from Alex, and prove to herself that she’s more than just a loud-mouth klutz before her time there is up?
The Edge of Forever by Melissa E. Hurst
In 2013, sixteen-year-old Alora is having blackouts. Each time she wakes up in a different place with no idea how she got there. The one thing she is certain of? Someone is following her. In 2146, seventeen-year-old Bridger is one of a small number of people born with the ability to travel to the past. While on a routine school time trip, he sees the last person he expected—his dead father. The strangest part is that, according to the Department of Temporal Affairs, his father was never assigned to be in that time. Bridger’s even more stunned when he learns that his by-the-book father was there to break the most important rule of time travel—to prevent someone’s murder. And that someone is named Alora. Determined to discover why his father wanted to help a “ghost,” Bridger illegally shifts to 2013 and, along with Alora, races to solve the mystery surrounding her past and her connection to his father before the DTA finds him. If he can stop Alora’s death without altering the timeline, maybe he can save his father too.
The Next Together by Laura James
Katherine and Matthew are destined to be born again and again, century after century. Each time, their presence changes history for the better, and each time, they fall hopelessly in love, only to be tragically separated. Spanning the Crimean War, the Siege of Carlisle and the near-future of 2019 and 2039 they find themselves sacrificing their lives to save the world. But why do they keep coming back? What else must they achieve before they can be left to live and love in peace? Maybe the next together will be different...
Return Once More by Trisha Leigh
Years have passed since refugees from a ruined earth took to space, eventually settling a new system of planets. Science has not only made the leaps necessary to allow time travel, but the process engineered a strange side effect—predicting your one true love. Sixteen-year-old Kaia Vespasian is an apprentice to the Historians—a group charged with using time travel to document the triumphs and failures of the past—and she can’t resist a peek at her long-dead soul mate in Ancient Egypt. Before she knows it, she’s broken every rule in the book, and the consequences of getting caught could destroy more than just her new romance. But when Kaia notices a fellow classmate snooping around in a time where he doesn’t belong, she suspects he has a secret of his own—and the conspiracy she uncovers could threaten the entire universe. If her experience has taught her anything, to changing history means facing the consequences. The Historians trained her to observe and record the past, but Kaia never guessed she might have to protect it— in a race across time to save her only chance at a future.
The Girl with the Red Balloon by Katherine Locke
Ever since she arrived in Germany on a school trip, Ellie Baum has felt the weight of history on her. After all, she’s the first one in her family to return since her grandfather’s miraculous escape from a death camp, and in Berlin, pieces of the past—World War II, the Cold War—are still visible decades later. One day, visiting the Berlin Wall Memorial, she sees a stray balloon floating across the park, and she wanders away from the crowd to follow it. One moment she’s reaching out to grab it—the next, she’s yanked back through time to when the wall is still standing. It is 1988, and Ellie is in East Berlin. Nobody knows how she got there, not even the members of the underground guild—the Runners and the Schöpfers—who use balloons and magic to help people escape over the wall. Now as a stranger in an oppressive regime, Ellie must hide from the police with the help of Kai, a Runner struggling with his own uneasy relationship with the powerful Balloonmakers and his growing feelings for Ellie. Together they search for the truth behind Ellie’s mysterious time travel, and when they uncover a plot to alter history with dark magic, she must risk everything—including her only way home—to stop the deadly plans.
The Spy with the Red Balloon by Katherine Locke
Siblings Ilse and Wolf hide a deep secret in their blood: with it, they can work magic. And the government just found out.Blackmailed into service during World War II, Ilse lends her magic to America’s newest weapon, the atom bomb, while Wolf goes behind enemy lines to sabotage Germany’s nuclear program. It’s a dangerous mission, but if Hitler were to create the bomb first, the results would be catastrophic. When Wolf’s plane is shot down, his entire mission is thrown into jeopardy. Wolf needs Ilse’s help to develop the magic that will keep him alive, but with a spy afoot in Ilse’s laboratory, the letters she sends to Wolf begin to look treasonous. Can Ilse prove her loyalty—and find a way to help her brother—before their time runs out?
Kissing Shakespeare by Pamela Mingle
Miranda has Shakespeare in her blood: she hopes one day to become a Shakespearean actor like her famous parents. At least, she does until her disastrous performance in her school's staging of The Taming of the Shrew. Humiliated, Miranda skips the opening-night party. All she wants to do is hide. Fellow cast member, Stephen Langford, has other plans for Miranda. When he steps out of the backstage shadows and asks if she'd like to meet Shakespeare, Miranda thinks he's a total nutcase. But before she can object, Stephen whisks her back to 16th century England—the world Stephen's really from. He wants Miranda to use her acting talents and modern-day charms on the young Will Shakespeare. Without her help, Stephen claims, the world will lost its greatest playwright. Miranda isn't convinced she's the girl for the job. Why would Shakespeare care about her? And just who is this infuriating time traveler, Stephen Langford? Reluctantly, she agrees to help, knowing that it's her only chance of getting back to the present and her "real" life. What Miranda doesn't bargain for is finding true love . . . with no acting required.
Timeless by Alexandra Monir
When tragedy strikes Michele Windsor's family, she is forced to move from Los Angeles to New York City to live with the wealthy, aristocratic grandparents she has never met. In their historic Fifth Avenue mansion, filled with a century's worth of family secrets, Michele discovers the biggest family secret of all - an ancestor's diary that, amazingly, has the power to send her back in time to 1910, the year it was written. There, at a glamorous high-society masquerade ball, Michele meets the young man with striking blue eyes who has haunted her dreams all her life. And she finds herself falling for him, and into an otherworldly romance. Soon Michele is leading a double life, struggling to balance her contemporary high school world with her escapes into the past. But when she stumbles upon a terrible discovery, she is propelled on a race through history to save the boy she loves - and to complete a quest that will determine their fate.
Now That You’re Here by Amy Nichols
In a parallel universe, the classic bad boy falls for the class science geek. One minute Danny was running from the cops, and the next, he jolted awake in an unfamiliar body - his own, but different. Somehow, he's crossed into a parallel universe. Now his friends are his enemies, his parents are long dead, and studious Eevee is not the mysterious femme fatale he once kissed back home. Then again, this Eevee - a girl who'd rather land an internship at NASA than a date to the prom--may be his only hope of getting home. Eevee tells herself she's only helping him in the name of quantum physics, but there's something undeniably fascinating about this boy from another dimension... a boy who makes her question who she is, and who she might be in another place and time.
Stolen Time by Danielle Rollins (coming February 5, 2019)
Seattle, 1913 // Dorothy is trapped. Forced into an engagement to a wealthy man just so she and her mother can live comfortably for the rest of their days, she’ll do anything to escape. Including sneaking away from her wedding and bolting into the woods to disappear. New Seattle, 2077 // Ash is on a mission. Rescue the professor—his mentor who figured out the secret to time travel—so together they can put things right in their devastated city. But searching for one man means endless jumps through time with no guarantee of success. When Dorothy collides with Ash, she sees it as her chance to start fresh—she’ll stow away in his plane and begin a new life wherever they land. Then she wakes up in a future that’s been ripped apart by earthquakes and floods; where vicious gangs rule the submerged city streets and a small group of intrepid travelers from across time are fighting against the odds to return things to normal. What Dorothy doesn’t know is that she could hold the key to unraveling the past—and her arrival may spell Ash’s ultimate destruction.
Time Between Us by Tamara Ireland Stone
Anna and Bennett were never supposed to meet: she lives in 1995 Chicago and he lives in 2012 San Francisco. But Bennett has the unique ability to travel through time and space, which brings him into Anna’s life, and with him a new world of adventure and possibility. As their relationship deepens, the two face the reality that time may knock Bennett back to where he belongs, even as a devastating crisis throws everything they believe into question. Against a ticking clock, Anna and Bennett are forced to ask themselves how far they can push the bounds of fate, what consequences they can bear in order to stay together, and whether their love can stand the test of time.
Into the Dim by Janet B. Taylor
When fragile, sixteen-year-old Hope Walton loses her mom to an earthquake overseas, her secluded world crumbles. Agreeing to spend the summer in Scotland, Hope discovers that her mother was more than a brilliant academic, but also a member of a secret society of time travelers. Trapped in the twelfth century in the age of Eleanor of Aquitaine, Hope has seventy-two hours to rescue her mother and get back to their own time. Along the way, her path collides with that of a mysterious boy who could be vital to her mission . . . or the key to Hope’s undoing.
All Our Yesterdays by Cristin Terrill
Em is locked in a bare, cold cell with no comforts. Finn is in the cell next door. The Doctor is keeping them there until they tell him what he wants to know. Trouble is, what he wants to know hasn't happened yet. Em and Finn have a shared past, but no future unless they can find a way out. The present is torture - being kept apart, overhearing each other's anguish as the Doctor relentlessly seeks answers. There's no way back from here, to what they used to be, the world they used to know. Then Em finds a note in her cell which changes everything. It's from her future self and contains some simple but very clear instructions. Em must travel back in time to avert a tragedy that's about to unfold. Worse, she has to pursue and kill the boy she loves to change the future.
Summer of Yesterday by Gaby Triana
Summer officially sucks. Thanks to a stupid seizure she had a few months earlier, Haley’s stuck going on vacation with her dad and his new family to Disney’s Fort Wilderness instead of enjoying the last session of summer camp back home with her friends. Fort Wilderness holds lots of childhood memories for her father, but surely nothing for Haley. But then a new seizure triggers something she’s never before experienced—time travel—and she ends up in River Country, the campground’s long-abandoned water park, during its heyday. The year? 1982. And there—with its amusing fashion, “oldies” music, and primitive technology—she runs into familiar faces: teenage Dad and Mom before they’d even met. Somehow, Haley must find her way back to the twenty-first century before her present-day parents anguish over her disappearance, a difficult feat now that she’s met Jason, one of the park’s summer residents and employees, who takes the strangely dressed stowaway under his wing. Seizures aside, Haley’s used to controlling her life, and she has no idea how to deal with this dilemma. How can she be falling for a boy whose future she can’t share?
Steel by Carrie Vaughn
A mysterious broken sword transports a modern teen through time to the deck of a pirate ship. Stranded in the past, and surrounded by strangers, she is forced to sign on as crew. But a pirate's life is bloody and brief, and as she learns about the dark magic that brought her there, she forms a desperate scheme to get home—one that risks everything in a duel to the death with a villainous pirate captain!
Wildwing by Emily Whitman
When Addy is swept back in time, she couldn't be happier to leave her miserable life behind. Now she's mistaken for Lady Matilda, the pampered ward of the king. If Addy can play her part, she'll have glorious gowns, jewels, and something she's always longed for the respect and admiration of others. But then she meets Will, the falconer's son with sky blue eyes, who unsettles all her plans.
From shipwrecks to castle dungeons, from betrothals to hidden conspiracies, Addy finds herself in a world where she's not the only one with a dangerous secret. When she discovers the truth, Addy must take matters into her own hands. The stakes? Her chance at true love . . . and the life she's meant to live.
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