#in one mashup

[chongoblog]

This might end up being part of a larger project, but I will die if I don't share it

[inkskinned]

you're grabbing lunch with a nice man and he gives you that strange grimace-smile that's popular right now; an almost sardonic "twist" of his mouth while he looks literally down on you. it looks like he practiced the move as he leans back, arms folded. he just finished reciting the details of NFTs to you and explaining Oppenheimer even though he only watched a youtube about it and hasn't actually seen it. you are at the bottom of your wine glass.

you ask the man across from you if he has siblings, desperately looking for a topic. literally anything else.

he says i don't like small talk. and then he smiles again, watching you.

a few years ago, you probably would have said you're above celebrity gossip, but honestly, you've been kind of enjoying the dumb shit of it these days. with the rest of the earth burning, there's something familiar and banal about dragging ariana grande through the mud. you think about jeanette mccurdy, who has often times gently warned the world she's not as nice as she appears. you liked i'm glad my mom died but it made you cry a lot.

he doesn't like small talk, figure out something to say.

you want to talk about responsibility, and how ariana grande is only like 6 days older than you are - which means she just turned 30 and still dresses and acts like a 13 year old, but like sexy. there's something in there about the whole thing - about insecurity, and never growing up, and being sexualized from a young age.

people have been saying that gay people are groomers. like, that's something that's come back into the public. you have even said yourself that it's just ... easier to date men sometimes. you would identify as whatever the opposite of "heteroflexible" is, but here you are again, across from a man. you like every woman, and 3 people on tv. and not this guy. but you're trying. your mother is worried about you. she thinks it's not okay you're single. and honestly this guy was better before you met, back when you were just texting.

wait, shit. are you doing the same thing as ariana grande? are you looking for male validation in order to appease some internalized promise of heteronormativity? do you conform to the idea that your happiness must result in heterosexuality? do you believe that you can resolve your internal loneliness by being accepted into the patriarchy? is there a reason dating men is easier? why are you so scared of fucking it up with women? why don't you reach out to more of them? you have a good sense of humor and a big ol' brain, you could have done a better job at online dating.

also. jesus christ. why can't you just get a drink with somebody without your internal feminism meter pinging. although - in your favor (and judgement aside) in the case of your ariana grande deposition: you have been in enough therapy you probably wouldn't date anyone who had just broken up with their wife of many years (and who has a young child). you'd be like - maybe take some personal time before you begin this journey. like, grande has been on broadway, you'd think she would have heard of the plot of hamlet.

he leans forward and taps two fingers to the table. "i'm not, like an andrew tate guy," he's saying, "but i do think partnership is about two people knowing their place. i like order."

you knew it was going to be hard. being non-straight in any particular way is like, always hard. these days you kind of like answering the question what's your sexuality? with a shrug and a smile - it's fine - is your most common response. like they asked you how your life is going and not to reveal your identity. you like not being straight. you like kissing girls. some days you know you're into men, and sometimes you're sitting across from a man, and you're thinking about the power of compulsory heterosexuality. are you into men, or are you just into the safety that comes from being seen with them? after all, everyone knows you're failing in life unless you have a husband. it almost feels like a gradebook - people see "straight married" as being "all A's", and anything else even vaguely noncompliant as being ... like you dropped out of the school system. you cannot just ignore years of that kind of conditioning, of course you like attention from men.

"so let's talk boundaries." he orders more wine for you, gesturing with one hand like he's rousing an orchestra. sir, this is a fucking chain restaurant. "I am not gonna date someone who still has male friends. also, i don't care about your little friends, i care about me. whatever stupid girls night things - those are lower priority. if i want you there, you're there."

he wasn't like this over text, right? you wouldn't have been even in the building if he was like this. you squint at him. in another version of yourself, you'd be running. you'd just get up and go. that's what happens on the internet - people get annoyed, and they just leave. you are locked in place, almost frozen. you need to go to the bathroom and text someone to call you so you have an excuse, like it's rude to just-leave. like he already kind of owns you. rudeness implies a power paradigm, though. see, even your social anxiety allows the patriarchy to get to you.

you take a sip of the new glass of wine. maybe this will be a funny story. maybe you can write about it on your blog. maybe you can meet ariana grande and ask her if she just maybe needs to take some time to sit and think about her happiness and how she measures her own success.

is this settling down? is this all that's left in your dating pool? just accepting that someone will eventually love you, and you have to stop being picky about who "makes" you a wife?

you look down to your hand, clutching the knife.

[breakbleheavens]

TAYLOR SWIFT performs IS IT OVER NOW? for the first time ▸ The Eras Tour — Buenos Aires, Argentina (Night 2) | November 11, 2023

[cametotheshowinsd]

Who’s Afraid of Little Old Me? (2024) written & directed by Taylor Swift

So tell me everything is not about me …but what if it is?

[dykealloy]

Bisexual lighting generator

[quail-in-red]

Hi!! I love love love your art and I adore that you can make the most insane mashup work up. If you are still doing the trope mashup could I ask for 72 Stranded on A Desert Island and 14 Bodyguard AU? Thank you and take care! 💚

Hi!! Thank you ❤️ here’s Bodyguard AU + Stranded on a Desert Island!

Trope Mashups!

[saeiken]

☀️☀️☀️☀️

[angstychilz]

A Brand New Life, A Whole New Shape

The human body is such a fickle thing. Accidents are bound to happen, and only so much can be done to correct them.

This idea has been rattling alongside my two brain cells for the past couple of days now. With the fact that, with the Book of Bill, Bill canonically is the last of his race after blowing up his home dimension (or something like that), my science nerd brain went “Oh, so he’s an endling. That’s unfortunate.” And then after listening to the song of the extinct Kauai ‘O’o, my brain went, “Does he have to be the only one tho.”

Honestly, making Stanford into a Euclidean was bound to happen with my thought process going the way it did. So, here he is in my AU called ‘New Normal’.

In this AU, I like tossing around the possible biological and social aspects of what being a Euclidean would be and feel like. Imagine what senses they would have with evolving into a society in their 2D world! So, what better way to explore it than stripping Stanford of his human body and giving him a new one!

Also, in case you are wondering what are around their ankles, those are tags given to them by some sort of intergalactic ecology nerd to keep track of Bill (and now Ford) considering they are an endangered species. It’s me y’all, I’m the intergalactic ecology nerd

Y’all, plz tell me I ain’t the only one brain rotting over the possibilities. Human Bill is fine and all, but I truly feel the potential of Shape-ford is untapped gold that needs pillaging. I have been yearning to see more of it ;w;

[wondercircuit]

[maplemaplemaplemaplemaple]

i love putting him in new outfits hes my barbie doll...

[chongoblog]

Happy Year of Shadow Baby!!!!!!!!

album art by the amazing @mightysen

[biscuit-munchies]

I'm on my stupid shit again people ;; Had an idea of a Harpy Jimmy Z cause bro NEEDS a creature power suit. How he got like that is Chris and Martin (mainly Martin) wanted Jimmy to get used to the creature power suits seeing he's the only one that doesn't really have one. Jimmy isn't all too keen on getting his own suit right away, so they use Martin's as a test. Chris shows him the basics of proper use of the CPS and which disks to use and what exactly to touch to activate (using chris' animal bits collection or whatever he calls it). They probably start off with 'easy' animals (like songbirds or small mammals) and Jimmy starts getting used to it, maybe even a bit more confident.

So these idiots boys keep cycling through different animals probably faster than the CPS is used to until BANG! The suit malfunctions! (as suits do) and Jimmy comes out as a mashup of different kinds of birds! (mainly a Harpy Eagle (hah), a heron, a vulture, and a hummingbird). Martin is amazed, Chris is like "huh?", and Jimmy is like "?????? WHAT THE FUCK????" and so hijinx ensues, or whatever

[mizaruwu]

an argument

[paper-mario-wiki]

[titsthedamnseason]

HAPPY LONDON N1 YALL!!! i can just feel this run of shows is going to be CRAZY. also if you haven’t realized hi it’s me juli titsthedamnseason and yes even under yet another new url i am hosting the surprise song game! the rules are simple: leave your guesses in the tags or replies and if you’re right i will give you a shoutout <3

i’m personally about to give the worst guesses ever but i already submitted them to mastermind so i feel like i have to stick with it. so im going imgonnagetyouback / better than revenge and robin / never grow up i definitely should be going with a london song or the black dog but hey. whatever

[s4ndg3m]

hear me out on scag x split guys. they both start with "s" it's practically canon.