#in my memory one followed the other
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
Just a little fun detail..
THAT KUDO IS SO SHORT HE TUCKS HIS PANTS IN HIGH BOOTS.
Bruce wears those pants just fine, so he wears normal shoes. But Kudo? Look at how big they are on him. He wears boots almost up to his KNEES just to wear those pants. They're so baggy on him that the middle part for where the crotch goes, it's also almost down to his knees
Guy, where'd you get the pants? Are you just that short? Or did you take them from the long-legged Bruce?
#SHORT KING?#SHORT KING!#such a cute detail#meanwhile if bruce stood up straight hes gonna hit his head on the doorframe#everyones heights compared to each other is always inconsistent from angles and just because and such#but kudo with big pants and tall boots for said pants? never changes#kudo#bruce#yoichi shigaraki#bnha#mha#boku no hero academia#my hero academia#no ones brought this up. WHY? ITS CUTEE#it cant be that Bruce is just super tall#yes bruce is really tall and maybe kudo took his pants#but kudo is still short compared to the vault door#yoichi is probably taller than kudo. and yoichi was born with a weak and tiny body#resistance and tall bruce follow around muppet smile short king kudo#the demon lord AFO is afraid of the short guy#and ended up holding him at his death so hes taller than him. kudo is the bigger man to AFO#makes a more menacing memory? the guy you hate and are so scared of is actually taller than you (totally)#in reality he has two thumbs (first pic)#spoilers
205 notes
·
View notes
Text
I'm just a psycho, babe, come and go out my mind! I didn't lose it, babe, there wasn't much to find!
Plain text:
My grip on my secrets slipping while I'm speaking in tongues Screaming at the top of my lungs in the confession booth! Take it with a pillar of salt, halt, it's not my fault! The Devil made me do it but I also kinda wanted to...
Song: 2econd 2ight 2eer, Will Wood (Spotify)
#scp art#scp fanart#scp 049#scp-049#digital art#digital sketch#music inspired art#will wood#I don't know what I was doing with the colours#I just slapped something down#There's this one artist whose 049 design I love so much and I'm trying to emulate it a little#While obviously keeping my own style and stuff#My memory is terrible but I think their url is crypticcrisps(?)#Anyways feast your eyes (the people who followed me for 049 art and then I posted other things)
144 notes
·
View notes
Text
#saw a bunch of people doing this and wanted to throw my hat in the ring lol#also doodled them for funsies from memory <3#but also so my non one piece followers have some point of reference#my weird not as popular favs <3 <3 <3 except for sanji and luffy but i couldnt bring myself to exclude them#there are other characters i excluded for sure . there are only 12 options#one piece#monkey d luffy#batchee#perona#sanji#corazon#cavendish#basil hawkins#paulie#kureha#charlotte katakuri#iceburg#toko
60 notes
·
View notes
Text
they love eachother so much you have no idea
(also i was listening to 'Welcome Home' by radical face for this one and i just think its very Themcore & you should check it out)
ok so abo au- Giyuu's an omega & Sabito's an alpha prime, theyre a pair & water pillars by the time Giyuu encounters the Kamados-
it starts off normal with him snapping at Tanjiro for having no spine & sending them off to Urokodaki, instead of saying anything through letter he just tells Sabito to meet him with Urokodaki in 3 days- he spends a day dealing with a different demon nearby before catching up w Tanjiro
He gets there while Tanjiro's scaling the mountain, Sabito arrives not too long after and they all sit & drink some tea until Giyuu starts explaining what happened. Sabito flips his shit when Giyuu says he'd commit seppuku in response to Nezuko eating someone, they start arguing and snapping at eachother until Urokodaki says 'Enough!' in a Tone.
They both duck their heads and stop while he explains the little event that happened on the way, he notes that Nezuko has 'an unprecedented amount of restraint' and Giyuu shoots a Look at Sabito who looks like he's just swallowed a lemon but relents to Giyuu's choice to let her live. Tanjiro arrives and collapses at the door, Sabito notes the look of sheer determination in his face before it turned confused at the New People in the house
Sabito gets up and walks out past him, Tanjiro turns back to Urokodaki & Giyuu and asks who that was. 'dont mind him, he doesnt like your situation right now. you'll encounter worse [than him] on your travels down this path' Tanjiro nods to the warning, then eats & they all chat for a bit before he finally conks out.
Urokodaki forces Giyuu to do chores around the place and set up him & Sabito's room since theyre staying for a little bit, like an hour in Sabito comes back and does his share of chores n such- they sort of ignore eachother, a little passive aggressively from Giyuu's side, it has Urokodaki shaking his head at their little spat
When it comes time to sleep Sabito finally caves when Giyuu lays down with his back towards him at a distance. He apologizes and says he realizes how much it means to Giyuu, 'im just scared of losing you' and Giyuu melts- how can he be mad about that? they make-up cuddle about it and in the morning they are rudely woken up by Very Loud Noise Very Close To Their Face- Urokodaki's way of getting back at them for not visiting for months, suddenly dumping 2 more children on him, and making him deal with their moody little asses the whole day before (he's still glad to see them despite all that tho<3)
over the course of 2 years whenever either of them would have time between missions they'd usually check in on how Tanjiro's training was coming along or if Nezuko ever woke up, after the first year when they stopped by they'd spar with him and correct his stance & motions and whatnot. Sabito's still a hardass and a little bit mean but he means well, Giyuu's very bad at teaching tho. Tanjiro really has to learn through actions with him bc he doesnt know how to explain whats wrong and whats okay. when they're not around Makomo's still the one sweetly running him into the ground with training<3
#loserboy giyuu posting#neros art tag#<need a new one bc 'my art' includes other ppl's posts who are tagged w it#helpful if i wanted to search for all posts tagged sabito since i dont tag him consistently but art tags not so much........#oh well#sabito#kny sabito#giyuu#tomioka giyuu#giyuu tomioka#sabigiyu#sabigiyuu#kny#kimetsu no yaiba#im so mad that my memory's so shit bc i had a really sweet convo between them when they were going to sleep#something abt trusting nezuko that turned to them being lovey-dovey comparing themselves to a god and their most devoted follower and it#was so SWEET but i fucking FORGOT IT!! like fuuuck man! that was the whole point of the pic!!!#whatever the pic conveys it anyway#also its got very similar colors to the other sabigiyu pic i made. they r matching#uhhh au tag. fuck. uhm#abo sabigiyu surprise adoption au#< lmao its a surprise bc sab & giyu dont realize they've adopted the kamado sibs until giyuu loses his shit @ that hashira meeting#then he doubles down like >:( no thats right actually. theyre mine. keep ur dirty mitts off them‚ SHINAZUGAWA.
400 notes
·
View notes
Text
OC-tober 21 - "Grasping the Splinters of My Previous Self"
Cardamomo / Caoimhe belongs to @starlightsuncrow
(SORRY rotated him too much in my mind and got hopelessly enamored)
#gw2#bweirdoctober#guild wars 2#gw2 sylvari#other's ocs#art#SORRY SORRY I GOT. I GOT SO INTO MY FEELINGS ABOUT HIM#its the#do you follow me for who i am now or the sylvari i was and dont remember#its the...... do you smile for me or the me in your memories#how do i honor who i was#the one still inside me#and still be myself#can i even becoming someone new or should i tread the path of who i was (who is now a stranger to me)#its the learning to be yourself and coexist with who you were(literally)#sobbing and sniffling and wiping my eyes#anyway hope you like this i had so much fun and i care him so fucking much#sorry for any inaccuracies i wanted to try and show the changes between them (and over time) so i was a little picky and choosy with refs#LOL#i'll draw him so niceys one day im sure#<- tags from a week ago im more ill about them now 🫶
101 notes
·
View notes
Text
Hush...Hush, Sweet Charlotte (1964)
"Miriam? He really... isn't here, is he? Just now, I thought I heard... sometimes at night, when I wake up, it seems as if he really is here. Don't turn on the light. It's not real when it's light. It's only real when it's dark - dark and still."
#hush...hush sweet charlotte#hush...hush‚ sweet charlotte#robert aldrich#1964#american cinema#lukas heller#henry farrell#bette davis#olivia de havilland#joseph cotten#agnes moorehead#cecil kellaway#victor buono#mary astor#wesley addy#william campbell#bruce dern#george kennedy#frank ferguson#frank de vol#Aldrich's follow up to Baby Jane reunited him with star Davis (and initially Crawford‚ until she left the project under a cloud; she can#just about be glimpsed in one of the long shots of cousin Miriam arriving at the house by taxi) and even provides a cameo for Baby Jane co#star Buono. the rest of his cast is also notably starry: de Havilland‚ Cotten‚ Moorehead‚ even a genuine cinematic legend like Astor not to#mention a pre fame Dern and Kennedy. sadly all that increased star power doesn't translate to a film even better than its predecessor#this is solid‚ a strong and sweaty gothic grotesquerie‚ but it's a little flabby and nowhere near as sharp or as honed as Baby Jane was#Davis often goes very large and brushes caricature more than once with her faded Southern belle but to give her her dues there are other#moments of true heartbreaking beauty in her performance. de Havilland is also very strong altho maybe tips her hat a little soon in#revealing the true personality lingering beneath the surface of her mysterious outsider. Aldrich is as strong as ever helming a killer#fantasy sequence... tbh the more i think about it the kinder my memory of this becomes. it has just one main flaw and that's that it isn't#Baby Jane. but then what is? Aldrich never quite hit those heights again (tho he did some p great work) and this is a commendable try
27 notes
·
View notes
Text
RULES: make a poll with 5 of your all-time favorite characters and then tag 5 people to do the same. See which character is everyone's favorite! (tagged by @seaweedstarshine)
Tagging (don't worry if you don't want to/have done it already!): @transgenderdoctorwhomst @27-27-gruff-triplets @quietwingsinthesky @lost-tardis-room @a-shard-of-quartz-lol
#rose rambles#thank you for the tag!!! :D#like Tree I tried to keep it to one per fandom#which meant I had to pick one from doctor who...#if I'd kept it to just dw It'd be Nine/Rose/Amy/Clara/the Master#also for the characters with the & symbol#its because both characters are Very Strongly Associated#Grima is the dragon/deity that possesses Robin in fea that he was like#born to be the vessel of. You usually prevent it from happening but the DLC/future story has it happen#and the story is preventing an event that by one view already occurred#as for Hermes and Fandaniel. Hermes was the ''full'' soul who took on the position of Fandaniel#and Fandaniel as mentioned on the poll refers to the soul piece in ''modern'' time that takes on the mantle of Fandaniel and body of Asahi#and has the memories of Fandaniel#but doesn't fully identify as Hermes#Fandaniel#or his most recent life Amon#he wants to blow up the world to end reincarnation👍#might as well explain the other two then for doctor who followers uhh#Jin is part of STREGA#a group of teens that were experimented on to awaken their Personas artificially#which is slowly killing them (their psyche is physically lashing out at them). So they also. Try to end the world.#The kids are left taking ''persona suppressors'' which is an experimental medication that is both the only thing keeping them alive and is#also slowly killing them. It doesn't get the chance to kill Jin though.#he's one of 3 (4 if you count the light novel) surviving kids out of 100 from the experiment and by the end of the game only Chidori is lef#And now Will Graham.#You probably all know Will Graham. And I have rambled long enough. But he's the origin of one of my names.#Most of these guys are villains thats just sort of how these themes get represented#and I'm nothing if not consistent lmao
28 notes
·
View notes
Text
the truly problematic thing about having insanely vivid dreams just about every night--and i mean the kind of vivid where you remember details days or even weeks later, like it's just another normal-ass memory--is that you wind up losing track on an emotional level of what's real. like. i know that was a dream. obviously it was a dream. but some part of my brain misses it like it really happened. i am painfully, achingly nostalgic for people i've never met, places i've never been, shit that literally could not ever happen--but i feel as though i remember. which is just the most unhinged thing, right? like, i remember going on a run that took me over a fence into Disneyland, and i remember having to take a shortcut through a Chinese restaurant, but it was fine, because Erika Ishii was there, and they'd done this before, so no worries. right? no! obviously not! why do i remember this with such visceral clarity three weeks later?
oh, what's your favorite episode of this TV show? the one i dreamt. yeah, don't worry about it, it didn't make coherent sense, but it was in the feelings, right? my ship had the best fucking scene. no, of course i can't explain it to you, that's madness. it involved a rocking chair. don't worry about it. it's fine. it's super important i don't accidentally reference this in a fic someday, though.
this shit is deranged, dude. missing people who are quite literally my own brain's invention with an actor's face. missing places that are a meld of a movie i saw once, my childhood bedroom, the second floor of my high school, and inter-dimensional space. like. no! no, this shouldn't be a thing! is, though. the clarity of it. just fucking bananas. this has been happening to me my whole goddamn life.
#dreams#the worst thing about being a writer who has had these wildly vivid dreams forever#is the CLEAR awareness that they do not follow story-logic. dream-logic is special and near-impossible to properly bottle#so like. i can't even use these not-memories#i can't write my 'new favorite episode' and share it with the class#i can't even tell my wife about the shit i fully remember seeing and doing while i sleep. because i didn't.#the other night i had such an insane flying dream that i woke up and told her 'for the record: i do dream in color.'#and she went 'of course you do.'#and i was like 'yeah of course i do but also this one was actively switching between color and black and white so. guess it's for suresies.#anyway i haven't had a dreamless night in...a really fuckin long time and it's nuts. false memories. everywhere.#it's astonishing i don't forget more real shit to make room#tell you what though. it does make warring against parasocial instincts WORSE. i am a mature adult who knows better.#but good goddamn my subconscious isn't helping
46 notes
·
View notes
Text
if anyone cares have an angel and vic anecdote because i miss her! when we got home on the 19th we were all really tired, we lowkey weren't even thinking about dan and phil at that point because we desperately needed rest. i think at this point everybody else was in the middle of changing or packing. vic was just sitting on the floor folding something and i was compelled to tackle them. a second after we both simultaneously realized that we Did The Thing and we started laughing hysterically about it (because it was funny and also we were exhausted). and in our fervor vic knocked our heads together and hit their nose on my forehead. it was still red the next day. i have been rotating this moment in my mind since friday because pinof day and that was So fucking funny
#vic tag#i wish we recorded more things from the trip to be honest#ofc we never wouldve thought hey lets record us packing in case something funny happens but i would love to rewatch that in 4k live action#instead of my hazy memory vision#i have so many funny little clips of us being idiots#there's this one of my irl doing the corpse pose and vic going through FUNERAL PLAYLISTS to find the right music to play to commemorate#their 'death' and then every time she moved she kept calling it rigor mortis#not what that means really. especially not laughing you do not laugh when you get rigor mortis#there's also one of vic just looking at me#i think i posted that picture#because their face just reminded me of that pic of dan with the glass of water on his head and idk if that was anything but it cracked me u#it's literally just a video of her looking at me. and then going 'did you take the picture? oh ok'#I! MISS! THEM!#please please please take me back to october 19th#i cannot stress enough how much it was our day more than theirs to me. and i really like that and i need to relive it about 50 times#i love my friends so bad#this post is not even about dan and phil. whatever it's my blog you're all just following it#i'm a vic phanaklusmos fan blog now#among other people ^_^#just a. my friends fan blog#sorry for being annoying but i'm full of love
7 notes
·
View notes
Text
#some nights are like this#where I linger on a photo or a memory for too long and I start to hurt#like physically really hurt#my teeth and jaw ache and it hurts to blink and my skin is tender#that started the night of his death- I got home from the vet and went to bed and couldn’t believe the physical pain#took four Benadryl just so I could knock out and get away from it#I sit with it most of the time now because that’s the last thing he gave me#the waves pass and then the next day I get up and go about my life even if I do it kind of badly#resiliency and forgiveness are what Jackalope modeled best#and I try to follow in his footsteps as I always did#one foot in front of the other
82 notes
·
View notes
Text
i love writting and interpersonal relationships between characters
#eta vaina e seria#“i need to [___] with them one more time” trope always gets me i'm so weak#the realizationTM he is willing of face the hardships of the dungeon for laios' sake okaaaaaaay kabru#laios looks so handsome in kabru's memory smh#and mithrun grew fond of his gen z comrade he will follow him on the gay autistic quest this is amazing to read#unfortunately i already knew mithrun's backstory however that fact didn't reduce my enjoyment of this chapter either his character#he's amazingly written and his dynamic w kabru and the canaries are great.#these three (kabru mithrun laios) are becoming my faves each chapter#and this is my fav chapter so far#kabru adopting the role of his caretaker mother with mithrun making his complicated relationship w her going full-circle#kabru being so careless with himself ignorant of basic chores learning how to improve his quality of life through mithrun#kabru exploring and forced to learn about the dungeon monster to get close to laios and accepting he actually cares about him#also mithrun seemingly improving his health by sleeping without help and his hair looking prettier? he def needed this adventure#they def needed to meet each other ugh so good#dungeon meshi#reading
18 notes
·
View notes
Note
What if i went back in time and smashed your gamecube. What would your childhood game collection look like then?
#ask#anon#anon i grew up with the n64#so like. not much different? i wouldnt have TTYD or Sunshine or Luigis Mansion#but like. around the time of the gamecube. my family had the n64. ps1. ps2.#id still have played battle for bikini bottom because i had it on PS2 first#we also had a few other consoles but i dont have a proper memory of which my brothers owned. were sold. or were borrowed#because we had a dreamcast. i played sonic adventure 1 (appearently got to the casino. i remember the ring shaker)#we had an SNES at one point. played mario world and donkey kong country 1#we had a sega genesis momentarily before we moved around the time i was 5#i remember playing aladin. mortal kombat (dont know which one) and a garfield 2D platformer that had a haunted mansion level#or something#but the dreamcast. genesis and... maybe the snes. we had those before the gamecube#with the n64 my main games were mario 64. banjo kazooie. and banjo tooie. and mario kart and mario party 2#ive still got almost all of my old n64 games. im missing my copy of toy story 2 and smash 64#my brothers owned metroid prime 1 & 2 for the gamecube so. i wouldnt have had that i guess.#iirc i got the gamecube for easter one year. i say iirc because i remember specifically getting Mario Sunshine#and the gamecube mightve been paired with it but i was specifically excited for mario sunshine#i woke up to follow like. a trail of starburst into the basement (its our secondary living room) to find the game and console... i think#so i forever associate Sunshine with starburst. idk if it was intentional or not.#starburst fits really well for the few times that colourful goop pattern is used. like at the very start of the game#anyway anon you couldve just asked what wouldve happened if i didnt have a gamecube. no need for the violence.#also the gamecube itself plays a very small role in my childhood. like in comparison to the PS2 games that came and went in my household#anyway. thank you anon for the ask. i think.
30 notes
·
View notes
Note
i already know what the story behind the picture is but please explain it anyway we need to educate the masses
oh my god thank you for enabling me ive been thinking about this all day. regarding this post i made yesterday and this classic image (which i actually just found out was posted seven years ago today!)
basically as can be read in the post at BigFest in 2016 somebody had what i believe was a fan-made prop based on the laptop from season 2 of gravity falls. alex hirsch attended this convention and decided to type in the password to the laptop. we never learned the password in the show so lots of people were excited to find out!
a HUGE thing to note here is that journal 3 was still months away from releasing and in fact while a couple pages had been released as promotional material it was still being worked on until, like... gosh i wanna say may is when they finally started printing it? don't quote me on that though my point is that this was all taking place pre-journal 3 and, therefore, many fans were still operating under the (sensible) impression that the laptop which
had been designed by fiddleford
had been built by fiddleford
had fiddleford's name on it
said "PROPERTY OF F" on it (at this point it had been established through promo images that "F" referred to fiddleford)
was assumed to be fiddleford's by, like, four different main characters
was given to and used by fiddleford following s2e7
fiddleford presumably knew the password to
would also belong to fiddleford. right? i mean logically. logically, guys.
so when alex hirsch revealed that the password had been "STANFORD" all along, people thought that was a little bit... well
of course, a couple months later journal 3 would be published and it would say that the laptop had actually been STANFORD'S, not fiddleford's, and that he had made the password his own name. so technically i lied in my earlier post, there IS a heterosexual explanation for this, but imo it's still bullshit. like sorry i don't believe for a fucking second that stanford "i need to encode all of my messages in multiple ciphers and write in invisible ink" pines would ever make a password as simple as his own name. he wouldve picked like something with six different layers of alternate meanings and also put it through atbash at the VERY least. also as i listed above there is a LOT of evidence which would support the laptop belonging to fiddleford, as opposed to ford, which has this random retcon (and like... some of the computer keys are different colors? i guess?? idk that bit was stupid) as its only supporting evidence.
my theory is that, while writing the show, alex and the other writers had intended for the laptop to belong to fiddleford, but for whatever reason, when they were writing the book, they decided to make it ford's instead. i want to make clear that i DON'T think this swap was motivated by homophobia, or as a reaction to seeing people interpret the password in a gay way. by the time that this photo was taken several promotional journal pages had been released, so it's safe to say that even if they were still adding the finishing touches to the book, it was pretty much in its final stage and in fact might have already started printing (i think the first photos we see of the book itself were posted like a week or two after bigfest). so to assume that there's a correlation there is both unfounded and extremely unlikely.
now, the stargazing scene reprint, on the other hand
#long post#gravity falls#fiddauthor#<- why the fuck not. it's midnight no one can judge me#why are you as a man making your computer password the name of the man you live alone in the woods with#sorry anon i doubt think this is what you had in mind when you said “explain it” LMAO#tales of the wild zeep#uhhh a couple other notes#1. i do not know who made the laptop prop at bigfest. i assumed it was a fan but i wasn't there i really don't know#2. i said may is when they started printing the book but i have literally no source for that#it is a guess based on when promotional photos were being posted#3. i say “fiddleford presumably knew the password to [the laptop]” and i just wanted to explain my reasoning there#basically in s2e10 fiddleford says that he “fixed” the laptop and is shown using it#we also see it at the start of the following episode being used to monitor the activity of the portal#now. i am not a computer engineer. i am mediocre with computers at best.#but based on what i have been told. when you are faced with a password screen. there are two ways to proceed#one way is to reset the computer's hard drive entirely‚ to... “erase its memory” if you will#however this would result in one being unable to access any of the information which had previously been stored there#considering that we see fiddleford using the laptop to monitor the portal's activity i believe that its files must have been intact#so we can rule out resetting as an option#the other way to proceed is by. um. knowing the password. and entering it#so THAT'S why i say that he PRESUMABLY knew the password.#now it's entirely possible that he was able to hack into the laptop or something. he is a mechanical genius and he built it after all#i'm just saying that i think it's far more likely that he just. knew the password.#which is honestly really funny and still kind of gay if you believe the whole “the laptop was actually ford's” thing#why are you as a man telling your computer password to the man you live alone in the woods with when you wont even write it in your diary#fucking apologies for this OCEAN of tags. ive done taxes all day im an adult im allowed to infodump about old hyperfixations as a treat
72 notes
·
View notes
Note
do you have any theories or things you'd like to see in s2 of yellowjackets?
crazy cannibalistic lesbian orgy death match when they all reunite
#lmaoo but no i guess i don't really have any theories yet#i'll probably rewatch the first season or find a recap somewhere because my memory is literally ass#i'm just guessing shauna is the first one to go full cannibal#and taissa will follow shauna anywhere (not van as you might expect)#see they're expecting us to believe lottie's cult is the first to eat human bodies but i don't think so#it'll be shauna / taissa / misty#and lottie / van on the other side#the others just float i think#i mostly just want to know what happened to shauna's first baby#are we going tragic and unfortunate or really really fucked up??#asks#anonymous#nonsims#brandi answers#yellowjacket spoilers#but only for the first season
67 notes
·
View notes
Text
i think itis funny in the past when i would list my interests as if i post abt them i donot post abt the shit im into rly Mainly bc im not rly Into Into anything anymore i occasionally watch or read or play something but i dont do fandom stuff rly much.... just sometimes i get brainworms
#do i still list my interests somewhere i dont knowwww#i just stopped rly being into fandom a few years ago combination depression antipathy + bad experiences in fandom spaces#but idk. me listing my interests didnt rly accomplish anything for anyone bc it was just like anddd just so you know i was crazy abt this#video game for a rly long time it probably wont ever come up again but it might maybe one day. yk. ig its just sharing info Which is one#supposes the point of all of this but idk#its not that im cagey abt my interests except that one which i cant talk abt publically bc its a triple a game and im embarassed abt it. no#anything bad im just embarrassed . its not anything any of my oomfies have ever posted abt either so its just for me. and lamp . and when#the third game comes out i might post very very very vaguely abt it ......... possibly.#but ya its like. idk i think you guys have to find out abt my plague tale obsession on your own through lived experience. aka just me seein#like the word king and randomly collapsing to the floor and going KING HUGO 😭😭😭😭😭 oh god hugo guys oh god . please play plague tale#i wish i had finished that tw thing i started making but then i got too focused on the color palette and making it look nice and i stopped.#umm tw child death animal death The plague some gorey stuff theres some cult things in the second game ummm. yeah ..... its rly special to#me tho i love those games PLAY PLAGUE TALE!!! and if u need more indepth tws ill give them to you even if i have to replay both games to#refresh my memory... lamp wont play plaguetale with me (not their speed) so im all alone </3 but i miss it i might replay soon... i wish i#was in like discord servers so i could play it on call w ppl or something <- is in discord servers but is shy and Also i feel like playing#game on call is like a level like 2 friendship thing and i cant even do level 1 friendship things like i feel i need to at least be talking#regularly in a server b4 i like try to do Calls in the server esp for plague tale bc its like a 1p game so wed need a rapport to like have#shit to talk abt and etc ..... i could just infodump abt the game but again i feel doing that to like strangers/oomfies would b weird. ik i#come on here and talk abt whatever i want but its like you guys dont Have to read this and its not like a server where Yeah im not talking#to one person but im still like Oh well ive sent a message and its in the channel and everybody just has to look at it and whatever.#but on here i post i nobody cares and it just gets pushed down and its Fine bc its not like anybody has to feel obliged to respond#which is fine. you know.. i just hate being like a nuisance i hate . idk how to phrase. imposing myself on others ig.. which is dumb bc the#i turn around and whine abt how i have no friends and its like Maybe that is bc you donot talk to anyone bc yr scared they will be annoyed#with you and you dont leave the house and have no interests to bond with ppl and etc. but basically the difference is ive written all this#and you guys can just not read it or you can just read it and ignore it and its different. even tho i am like addressing you and i do have#like. weird parasocial thing with My followers or whatever where i talk directly to you YES YOU! reading this. IDKK im rambling so much i#dont know what im talking abt anymore. i proooooobably need to go to sleep im hungry tho but im not but i am. but i think my sleep is getti#off schedule again i had trouble sleeping yesterday too... ugh
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
The more I think on how I am when I'm badly dissociated for a long period of time the more I start to realize that maybe what I experience isn't normal dissociation and idk how to feel abt that
#like hmmm maybe having hours to weeks at a time where whatever consciousness makes me me doesnt exist at all isnt normal#maybe having my brain and body run themselves as I fully disappear is weird. maybe seeing memories of those moments like movies instead of-#-my own experience is a sign of something. but also if its a sign of something that something could be used to prevent me from transitioning#so that something I think is best to not think abt until I've at least gotten top surgery.#but its also hard not to think abt bc like. it is uncomfortable. death and the potential following non-existence aren't scary#but the idea of not existing within my own body while I'm still alive is. because if I'm not there#A where the hell did I go. B what the fuck is living for me#feels like I get knocked out and possessed and then afterwards the ghost shows me a video of everything it did like??? cool one question WHY#like thanks for letting me nap for a bit while you live for me but can we try communicating about this instead of snapping me out of reality#its nice to avoid breaking down from stress and all but like. there's gotta be a better way to avoid it than this.#surely I have options other than spontaneous nonexistence and possession#idk. thats what it always feels like and like. I dont hate it but I dont like it either. its fine but its also very uncomfortable
2 notes
·
View notes