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#in conclusion i love him forever.
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seeing the latest louis’ quotes i wonder what he’s like in relationship…is he the mature one or is he more emotional and “ready to fight” type of person? he’s definitely mature in his words and his way of thinking but also i just think that sometimes emotions are getting better on him and he’s not thinking rationally…he’s very complex person and i honestly find it fascinating, i want to study him hahaha
BESTIE I love this topic I think about how he is like "off camera" allll the time like the things I'd do to be able to know him in a normal setting!!! and don't get me wrong I don't think that his core values and his personality are any different irl but I do think he must be even more fascinating when he's not actively "performing" for interviews and such and when he can relax and talk spontaneously!
for what regards how he's like in a relationship I think based on his lyrics that he's actually really mature and that he really doesn't like fighting and yelling and if he can do anything to avoid it he will, including suppressing his own arguments/needs for the other person bc he genuinely believes in the importance of love above everything (sometimes to a fault, although the fault is really of the people who take advantage of this) .
this was also reflected in the lyrics we got of written all over your face when even as the other person is angry and "a hurricane behind the door" and trying to instigate fights with him he's just telling them "when we're finished saying nothing can we please get back to loving?" "can we please get back to us?" like that's really all he wants, I think here we can see another example of what he was feeling in defenseless , he's too tired to fight he's "too tired to be tough [he] just want[s] to be loved by you" and he tells the other person "when u figure out what we're fighting for I'll be ready to talk" again showing maturity and also distaste for this useless and unjustified fighting while at the same time always keeping his heart open for the other person. I think there's a lot of maturity but also bravery in the way louis navigates relationships because he's constantly showing the other person his complete vulnerability, he's defenseless, no weapons, no screams, he just lays his heart there, ready to talk , ready to be loved, and that can be incredibly scary and dangerous especially when on the other side you have someone who's come "ready for a war" and that "keeps on building up [their] fences" and has left and hurt him before, but for louis it's always worth it
also in waoyf like in defenseless he tells then that he can see through their act, he knows the other person is trying to fight over nothing and in defenseless he tells them that he can see through their facade of "acting like u feel no pain you know I know you do" so I think being with him must also mean that you probably wouldn't be able to hide much of your feelings from him bc hes really attentive and perceptive of other people's emotions, especially of those he loves.
in general I think he does feel very strong emotions and can sometimes have a bit of a temper but from what we've seen I think when it comes to personal relationships he prefers to be mature and to talk heart-to-heart.
and he's also imo more inclined to feel strong negative emotions towards himself rather than towards other people, we saw him struggle with nerves on multiple occasions and in those occasions we saw helene helping him via reassurance about his own artistry and talent (remember the afhf doc where she was telling him that he was so nervous because he's a perform and that's a good thing ! ) and he himself has spoken about positive visualization and reassurance as something that helps him
and in his own songs at least in walls we've heard him blame himself and Apologize a lot so I think he has no problem apologizing and he's often the first to do so
overall I think louis is a very complex, multifaceted, fascinating and intelligent person, he does have a loud personality and strong opinions and emotions but he can also be really introspective, mature, honest and gentle
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toretzka · 3 months
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There's been a few hours since the end of the game and one of the things I can't stop thinking about is how much I admire Müller. It's crazy to think I have followed his steps ever since his first day with the main team and how amazing it felt to see him shining the brightest.
The 2010 World Cup was HIS. No one shined more than he did. I remember I used to feel so anxious and so excited to watch the games because I knew I would see him playing spectacularly. Since the first day, his energy and style of playing have been unmatched. He became my favorite player in 2010 and no other player ever came closer to what he means to me. When the 2014 World Cup happened and he once again shined so much, this time with the nt being the best of the competition, I once again felt so happy.
Of course I feel annoyed and sad how he never got half the admiration from the public eyes than some other players did. He is one of the best players of his generation, playing in his own style and still people wouldn't talk about it. People still won't talk about how he didn't start any Euro 24 game, was only subbed in for the first one, but even with the lack of playing time, when subbed in yesterday, he changed the whole game, like we knew he would.
Football is a group game. Unlike some other really big players, Müller is someone who PLAYS FOR THE TEAM AND WITH THE TEAM. That's what I admire the most about him. He understands that it's group work. It was probably his last steps with the Germany team, and it breaks my heart that these weren't happy ones, and it will hurt me for a very long time. But I'll try to hold tight to the happy memories, the ones that always comfort me, the ones that make my heart warm.
Müller gave me such happy moments, I couldn't ask for a better player to admire and call my forever favorite.
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deepseawave · 2 months
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obsessed w the tags on ur last reblog
Omgg, thank you haha, it was a quality post so I just had to appreciate it in full force 😂❤️
Can‘t believe someone would actually enjoy my yapping :,D
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#guys help is it time for a rebranding?? am I just gonna post about f1 now??#I still can’t believe this has all started because bestie and I were watching Ted Lasso (because I’ve been obsessed with that show for a#while now too) and I paused the episode to talk about how I really like the way Jamie interacts with kids (I’m sorry people being good with#and nice to kids is one of my weaknesses I work with kids now and have been invested in treating kids well forever)#so me saying that apparently reminded her of max and she showed me a video of him with p and yeah it was very effective in making me like#him and then we left the episode on pause and she told me a lot about f1 and max specifically cause I was interested now lmao (funny thing#is that she also got roped into it by our other friends I swear it’s speeding lmao#she also compared him to Jamie from Ted lasso (if you know you know) and showed me some heart wrenching Taylor swift edits (i haven’t#emotionally recovered yet) and yeah that’s how I started consuming way too much f1 content on YouTube and got into this whole mess lmao#oh yeah our friends also made me and another friend make a Tier list for all the drivers based on vibes alone (cause I only knew a bit about#max at that time and the other one knew nothing really) which was very funny too#especially looking back at it (we did some of them so dirty lmao 😂)#I’ve also come to the conclusion that tumblr is still one of the least annoying platforms to engage with other people (still)#YouTube is full of hate comments about drivers and stuff it’s so annoying actually#not to mention Twitter but I don’t go there and probably never will 😂#I personally don’t enjoy fics and scenarios and shipping of real people cause it makes me a bit uncomfy (not judging people who do#you do you as long as it doesn’t negatively affect anyone#but yeah I’d much rather just scroll by those here than have to look away from all the mindless hate and which driver is better discussions#everywhere else like I’m not one to engage with stuff like that but it does upset me to some#degree so yeah tumblr making memes and being rather positive about their drivers (most of what I’ve seen here of course there are gonna be#annoying people everywhere) is much more tolerable and a lot more enjoyable for me#whoops this post got away from me again oh dear#I’ve had the idea for a meme stuck in my head for days now: Max verstappen but make it if you don’t love me at my *swearing on team radio#giving spicy replies and attitude to the media maxplaining and complaining going for risky overtakes* you don’t deserve me at my *precious#interactions with p talking about his cats being a goofball with other drivers and especially danny defending other drivers driving#beautifully in the rain* it’s a package deal you can’t just pick and choose and personally I don’t even get why people complain about some#of the other stuff I appreciate someone who’s passionate and honest and genuinely kind where it matters 🤷🏻‍♀️#I think I’ve seen someone else say that but the more people complain about and criticize max the more I feel the need to defend him#god forbid women have hobbies for real (can’t believe I’ve yapped so much I can’t put more tags 💀)#also shoutout to Oscar Piastri and Danny Ric (I was so happy Oscar won even tho McLaren where being very silly in a not so funny way)
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ari !! ari i hope u are doing so so amazing n vibing and living ur best life, i feel like i haven’t been interacting as much these days so i wanted to stop by n say hi!! :] and hmmm ive yet to read your best friend’s brother fic but it made me wanna think of an unrequited love between best friend!satoru and you where satoru is the one down horrendous instead (and perhaps you’re already spoken for.. mayb with sugu…. this is totally not ari-specific bait) i would love to hear your thoughts on our special little loverboy not being loved back in the ways he wants so bad )): 🫶🏼 side note if i think abt this pining bestie!gojo too much i get so sad i fear he’d never get over that crush on you even if you were already married to someone else… 💔💔💔💔
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LOGAN !!!!! ^ this is me @ you rn……. i am kissing you and biting you gently <33333
I’M DOING PRETTY WELL… flowers r starting to bloom over here which is so nice !!! i’m just kind of waiting for summer ….. i have so many fic ideas that i wanna get to but not enough time :’3 not to mention my neglected tbr………
bUT overall i’m doing well!!! i hope it’s the same for you!!!!! it’s so sweet of u to drop by sniffle…. but pls don’t ever feel pressured to !! i saw that post you made a couple days ago n pls just know there’s never any pressure or obligation for you to interact often and stuff!!!! i’m always happy to speak to you whenever, so there’s never any rush <33 (i totally get it too… i’m pretty sure i have the online status thing turned off which takes off a lot of that pressure so!! i recommend doing that if you haven’t already <33)
BUT OKOK. onto the good stuff!!!! logan…. this probably doesn’t come as too much of a surprise considering the fic i posted but . i rlly love the unrequited love trope!!! >:3 i used to be the biggest sucker for hanahaki aus…. still am……. i need to write smth on it at some point bc i think it’s one of the best things ever created (and it’s perfect for toru let’s be real… the flower symbolism)….. SO. scenarios like this are very appealing to me!! and with bestie!satoru too…….. i have many thoughts >:33 let’s see how long i manage to stay coherent hehe
FIRST OF ALL. the ari specific bait…… you little weasel (affectionate) OK BUT . the fact that it’s Suguru in Particular changes a lot i think. i’ll circle back to that later tho trust 🙏
okay so. overall!! and i’d love to know your thoughts on this logan….. i firmly believe that satoru is the type to love one single person for the rest of his life. he never moves on from them. once someone has earned his love and nestled their way into his heart they’re there to stay. (and i’d argue that it’s kinda supported by canon yk… satoru hanging on to his memories of youth/suguru no matter how much time passes :’3)… so!! yeah!!! i definitely think he’d stay in love with his bestie forever, even if he knew fully well his feelings wouldn’t be returned. that’s just my take though!!!
i thinkkkk the tricky part is just. how satoru feels about it. a part of me wants to say that he handles it decently, that he’s happy just to be around you… but i think it’s also natural for him to feel a little empty about it all. bc he truly is!! a loverboy!!! deep down he yearns so badly for intimacy :(((( satoru is just such a pro at isolating himself and i think it gets worse in this kind of scenario. he loves you but does keep a certain distance i think…. to make it easier for himself and also so he doesn’t mess anything up for you. but he can never keep himself away for too long……
ok so we’re circling back to sugu now. i think satoru would handle the situation a lot better if suguru and you were together. my stsg-infested brain just can’t imagine an au where he isn’t at least a little bit in love with suguru…. and i think seeing two people he loves and trusts with all his heart be together doesn’t bother him nearly as much as it would have if you were with a random third party. there’s this One quote i like from . um….. a voice actor. of a character. in… ohshc 👉👈 AND I JUST THINK IT FITS IN THIS SCENARIO OK…….. :’3
I think Kyoya is very much in love with Tamaki and with Haruhi. He’s very much in love with the both of them. And I think it matures to a point where he would much prefer to see the both of them together than him with either one. Because they make more sense together than he makes with anybody else.
i think that’s sort of how he’d feel!!! there’s a kind of maturity there that satoru has imo. and since he’s so close to both of you, he doesn’t have to worry about being pushed out of your life (which might be his biggest worry in a scenario where you’re together with a random third party)…… so. yeah!!! would it be angsty? yes ofc. but i rlly do see satoru as a mature character, and also often selfless!!! he just respects you and your choices so much :(((
……….. what i will say. is that if you happened to get together with someone who didn’t treat you well. he would Shut That Shit Down instantly <3333 we love angry protective satoru !!!!!!!!
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can't stop thinking abt how the fact that declan mattered so little to his father that the asshole couldn't even be bothered to keep the memories of the day his son was born was supposed to make up for declan's whole shitty childhood
like hey kid u know what u just weren't worth the pain. do u feel better abt it now.
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raisinushigher · 8 months
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am i the only one who has a feeling that scudworth being able to clone the students like right the same age and brains and everything might be important later . like ik the show’s whole thing is throwing dumb unimportant stuff in your face and that’s like a big part of the comedy with it but i feel like they didn’t reveal that he can do that and make that clear for no reason
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whenthegoldrays · 4 months
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I don’t know what it is about the Jane Austen adaptations I’ve seen recently, but they just have so much trouble sticking the landing.
#i mean#ANY mansfield park adaptation??#especially 1999 but that one has a whole bunch of other stuff wrong with it too#and I almost GET IT because in the book the conclusion *is* very quick#but isn’t the point of an adaptation to expand on what is missing in the book?#also Emma and p&p#both of those books have such good rich things happen after the accepted proposals but the major adaptations just totally gloss over that??#Harriet and Robert meeting again in London! where’s my Emma adaptation that gives me that?!#Lizzy and Darcy being all cute after she accepts him!!!#I really feel like#in a miniseries ideally Darcy’s proposal and knightley’s proposal would both be at the *beginning* of the last episode#not almost at the end of it#because let! the other! things! happen!#let Austen’s storytelling shine!!!#can’t speak for the book in s&s discourse because I never finished it but like. 1995 and 2008 both had lovely endings#it’s not too hard in that sense#but it also is??? apparently? if we’re going by the 1981#need to watch the 70s one too#AND D O N ‘ T get me started on mansfield park#where ?! WHERE?!?! is my adaptation where we actually get to see Edmund slowly falling for Fanny at the end????#(I do not see 1999 it doesn’t exist)#like no. because in that one they paint Edmund like he’s been in love with Fanny forever and. no????#and then 2007 with him just having this random epiphany- what? two weeks after he breaks up with Mary?#and then he just runs out and kdrama-arm-grabs Fanny in the garden and kisses her??? HATE IT THANKS#at least when kdramas do it it’s kind of romantic#this Edmund was just creepy#and since we’re back on this discussion PLEASE I’VE BEEN ON MY KNEES give us a likeable Edmund!!!!!#I just used up my tag limit so I’m gonna tag this for my files and shut up and go to bed :) <3#elly's posts#jane austen
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4giorno · 7 months
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i got the cutscene <3
#its actually crazy that there was even more content i missed that impacted the story this much#like this rlly illustrated how even tho my character and astari0n have both become better people astari0n is still so behind in that#(we know why ofc. hes still acting like a feral cat trying to self preservere with teeth and nail and all until the very end; the ritual)#my character had his most obvious 'shifting point' at the transition from act 2 to act 3#like he fully realized that this is now truly bigger than himself. he has left marks on the lands and he has to go all the way#he has made true friends. one of his best friends is the kindest most compassionate person in the world#and very importantly he loves astari0n and THAT is the reason he now feels this actual compassion towards the other spawn#hes so personally invested in this issue now#and he can say that 'the world can be a wonderful place if you find your home in it astari0n' bc its something he has just recently had#a personal revelation abt#and astari0n deflects it and describes my character as someone who now 'spends their life sorting out other peoples problems'#and it rlly brings it to focus that he just cannot meet him where hes at anymore#just great conflict that feels actually meaningful and perfectly fits into the roleplay storyline ive made for my character#and omg the line 'im doing this for you too you know. to make sure were both safe. forever' from astari0n is just AAAAAAHDJJDJD. CRAZY#bc we know how toxic he becomes towards you if he completes the ritual!!!!!!#HHHHH this character!!!!! hes just MWAH. perfection#i cant wait until i get to doing the szarr palace again bc this added conflict will make the conclusion of this quest even more satisfying#anyway TOTAL tonal shift time. in start of the cutscene astari0n is standing next to the bed my character was sleeping in#so i can now have the hc that some nights they sleep in the same bed <3#(WELL. you know. my character sleeps while he meditates)
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terzomega · 1 year
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coming out as a copia hater due to recent tags by @waspspirits it's real
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whatwillyousing · 4 months
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like idk i think if youre going to make the emotional thesis of your game be about how you have to let things go & that you can't keep on living the same way with the same people forever then you should. maybe follow through on that. and actually demonstrate this as fact for how your story functions
#its hard to describe the specific way that isat approaches certain topics because a lot of the time i feel like its not... actually written?#its like. it has its characters Say Things to address certain topics#but in such a way that it never actually meaningfully affects the story#like. if siffrin's single greatest fear is abandonment from his loved ones and that this fear was so deathly overwhelming#that not only did it trap an entire country in a time loop but also nearly caused the literal end of the world#then.. the conclusion being ''siffrin does actually get to stay with his friends for practically forever and he was worried over nothing''#with only the smallest tiniest asterisk appended that *yeah he'll technically have to learn how to part ways eventually#*but he doesn't have to do that now. because thats too sad. that can wait for later#its like..... i get you don't want your little found family broken up but#not actually breaking them up in the end does kind of feel like sabotaging the thematic core of your own work#isat spoilers#i'll relent here though that this particular point may not be the exact message/theming the game is ultimately trying to get across#i think the entire game is more of a thing about siffrin's insecurities and self hatred clouding their judgement#and eventually impairing their interpersonal relationships#so having the ultimate conclusion be a wholehearted affirmation that siffrin is actually loved#even at-- especially at-- their absolute lowest#& that their friends wouldn't so easily abandon them#is like. yeah. .its really sweet.. but theres. something still missing from that#& i think its that the ending inadvertently ends up undermining siffrins agency in all this by having Loop be the one to reveal#everything about the timeloop rather than siffrin themself. esp when so much of sif's strife comes from desparately trying to keep it secre#to their own active detriment & to their friends' own active detriment. his blatant refusal to accept Any help is hurting Everyone#you could argue that having loop reveal it still ''counts'' in some form because loop is an alternate self of siffrin but...#loop & sif are... narratively functionally two separate characters who have two entirely different purposes#and it just. doesnt work. it should have been siffrin who told his friends face first about the timeloop. about his situation. about all hi#passive lies. & the fact that the truth had to be further coaxed out of him from his Friends feels only further unsatisfying to me
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coolcoelacanth · 10 months
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i think i can't move on because there is a part of me that is waiting for him to come back. there is a part me that is too scared to let go, because that would mean losing him forever. i don't want to think that we will never share anymore beautiful moments, or that i will never know what it feels like to lay in his arms again.
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lilpomelito · 7 months
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my favorite thing about Steve is that he’s actually a very confident guy, overconfident I would say sometimes, so in my head he has the shortest gay crisis ever like he realizes on a random Tuesday morning while slowly rotting on his costumer service job that his weird fixation with Eddie and how close he is with that punk dude from the Hideout is jealousy actually, so that means he has a crush on Eddie. Huh, that’s weird, has he had crushes on guys before? Maybe, his friendship with Tommy was intense and weirdly possessive actually, and their fight did feel like a breakup kind off and Tommy did behave like a bitter ex afterwards… also now that he thinks about it his obsession with the captain of the baseball team who was a senior when he was a junior was totally a crush in retrospective. And as he comes to this conclusion he also thinks damn what a waste, I could 100% have pulled him. So that same day he’s driving to Eddie’s place like “hi i’m taking you out” and Eddie doesn’t know if he’s about to be wine and dinned or murdered in the middle of the woods but he’s also a weak weak man for pretty boys so he just follows where Steve tells him to go. They have a lovely date at the dinner and then drive up to the quarry to see the sunset and then a very intense makeout sesh in the back of Steve’s car when Eddie remembers to ask him if he’s even into guys. Steve who already has his hands in Eddie’s pants looks him dead in the eye and says “yeah since this morning I think, but also since forever.” And Eddie who had to spend years slowly crawling his way out of Narnia to even admit to himself he was gay even less admitting it to others just blinks and accepts the fact that yeah, Steve Harrington has always had that vibe actually, and resumes kissing him.
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rewatching some disco elysium scenes and thinking abt geto …… the conversation w dora at the end reminds me of him so bad for some reason :// just . him and a reader who moves on…. while he clings to the past…….. sigh sigh sigh
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seraphdreams · 8 months
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SMILE, YOU'RE ON CAMERA. | YUUTA OKKOTSU.
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𓏲 ࣪₊♡𓂃 — synopsis. when taking care of your university finances proves troublesome, the universe grants you your very own savior. but it’s gonna cost you.
𓏲 ࣪₊♡𓂃 — cw. smut, college au!yuuta / bimbo reader (obvi), filming, lots of porn references… a lot, virginity loss, praise, oral n fingering, slight obsession, pussydrunk yuuta, unprotected love making, yuuta’s rich and unsettling. mdni <3
𓏲 ࣪₊♡𓂃 — word count. 5.3k
𓏲 ࣪₊♡𓂃 — dolled up! omg, yuuta? i meant to have this out a few weeks ago but got caught in a little writing slump :( nevertheless, here’s to a new year and a new fic! yuuta’s been slowly creeping his way up my favs list , tehe !! as always, please reblog / comment if you enjoyed this , it’ll fill me with joy. thank u ♡
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you’re a pornstar.
albeit, an amateur one with heaps to learn regarding the ruthless industry, but the weight still stands.
the details in which you came to the jarring conclusion were muddled with the convoluted steps that it took for you to get there, murky in your bubblegum-filled mind. all you knew was that yuuta okkotsu was a force, a gentle one, to be reckoned with.
it must’ve played out once you returned to your campus dorm beyond the dusk of midnight, under an unmitigating fatigue from the twelve hour waitressing shift just prior. through abhorrent patrons and the lack of a spendable paycheck, the excruciatingly long night barely made you enough money to even think about buying those dollish pumps you’ve been yearning for. how cruel.
in between working and haphazardly handing your earnings over to university fees and textbooks, you just couldn’t seem to make ends meet.
you would curse the day you took it upon yourself to branch away financially from your parents under the guise of growing up, since now it’d be a blessing to have even a cellphone bill paid off. whatever the issue seemed to be, lady luck was truly never bothered enough to be on your side.
fortunately for you, though, it was that same arduous night, you had been huddled against your stuffed animals in bed, mindlessly scrolling through the various social media apps on your phone; switching from sites like instagram and twitter to youtube then right back to instagram all over again, only to be met with an offer dusted in pink glitter that caught your eye as if it were made for you.
“stars needed — will pay upfront.”
it was a shoddy story post, one that could be clicked past and forgotten forever — yet, a brisk reminder of your situation in the form of borrowed, used textbooks with pages missing or vandalized, and today’s horoscope that said to take risks; you did exactly that, aiming a swipe up that would ultimately rid you of the worries of yesterday.
there were no reasons as to why you couldn’t be a star. certainly, you had the face for it, and you were told by multiple charmers that you were beyond beguiling to get anything you could ever ask for. what dismay could possibly unfold from contacting .. yuuta okkotsu .. about his offer?
hm, that’s funny. the name rang familiarity as it seeded in your mind.
must be one of yuuji’s friends.
itadori yuuji, your best friend of three years now. out of all the time you’d spent together, you came to realize that he could get along with anyone, despite their true intentions. he spoke highly of his friends as well, which earned him a sacred spot in your heart that couldn’t be replaced by anyone.
itadori had briefly mentioned in a ramen-fueled frenzy that one of his peers were “so insanely talented” and that you’d definitely get on with him. but when you asked for validity on that vague claim, all yuuji seemed to respond with was a mere “just meet him, you’ll see.”
from your recollection, the acquaintance he was boasting about, as if it was his own personal victory, was none other than your yuuta okkotsu. he was meek, stuck to a close-knit friend group consisting of maki and toge from your physics class, and the one time you ever spoke to him was to ask about yuuji’s whereabouts, to which he responded that he went back to his dorm after gojo-sensei’s lecture.
he seemed, normal. average, even. that surely had to be the case since your memory was hazy on his being otherwise.
it was true, though, yuuta was gifted. in a way that transcended words, skillful towards visual aesthetics, and careful with the craft. he would spend most of his freetime fumbling with a camera or recording the works of the mundane. overtly, he’d grown such a strong passion in the field of videography in hopes to capture the reality of humanity, the authenticity within intimacy — what could he possibly need a “star” for?
shadiness aside, you were in a tough spot, willing to do whatever to free yourself from the financial burden that was jujutsu technical university. with a swift swipe in tandem with the soft tapping of the pads of your thumbs on the keyboard, you were taking yuuta up on his offer.
within seconds, he responded back with his address and an appropriate meet-up date to start the project.
if only you were aware of how drastically your life would change from here on out.
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a cluster of days had passed since you last got into contact with yuuta. he had told you to meet him at his place, claiming it would be more efficient than traveling to an unnamed destination with pounds of heavy photography equipment.
where you stood currently, was in front of the bare oak of his front door, hand wrapped in a loose fist as you knocked gently on the wood. a quick moment had passed by before you took initiative to raise your fist and knock once more. before your touch could meet the wood, a muffled “coming!” chimed beyond the door. from what you had heard on the other side; the scuttling behind the door and jingle of the lock, yuuta had opened the door soon after.
with his hand rubbing away the goosebumps that stood at the back of his neck, he beamed. cordially, warmly.
“you’re actually here. hi,”
upon first glance, yuuta had a distinct look. he stood tall, not tall enough to matter or incite intimidation, and although he wore a black button-up (a bit formal for an occasion as casual as today), his lean build shone through under the thin fabric, ripples of veins dancing up his forearms. what you couldn’t miss, however, were the grey eyebags under his emotionless navy orbs, as if he’d forgone weeks of sleep.
yuuta okkotsu was unsettling.
“hi,” your voice sounded as a sweet croon, dulcet enough that you could barely hear it yourself as it escaped in a breathy breeze. his smile grew softer in response, that monotonous gaze in his eyes fizzling away into something of serenity. “come in, please,” yuuta held the door open wider for you to tread past, caught up in observing the bunch of fabric that hugged tightly around your ass, then closed it gently behind you once you stepped completely inside. he silently cursed at himself for ogling — he truly didn’t mean to stare. you’re just a lot prettier up close. “i was just getting set up. you can have a seat if you’d like.”
as you’d expect from any guy your age, his place wasn’t much to gaze at, nor did it have much personality. in a corner to your right was a houseplant, that of the fern variety, and a few steps deeper into the abode was the living room, where yuuta resumed his fumbling with the transfiguration of his tripod.
you decided to sit on the couch across from him, taking in the bleak sight of his home. you would have almost believed it was unlived in had it not been for the scattered midterm review papers decorating his coffee table. it was obvious he had money from the endless rows of space that surrounded the two of you, although a candle or something would be nice.
he peered away from his tripod to look through the viewfinder of his camera, ensuring that the lens was functioning properly. he grew pleased to see the image of you distracted in fiddling with your thumbs reflected back at him. “are you nervous?” his gaze fell upon you through his own eyes, a concerned expression harboring his features.
you were pulled out of your muse of unfamiliarity to direct your attention to the sound of his mild voice, returning a smile to his that eased the worriment trapped behind dull, blue eyes. “n-not really, i don’t think.”
his lips curled up once more at that, in fact there wasn’t a time so far that you hadn’t noticed him without his signature smile. “here, let me help with that,” reaching into his pocket, he pulled out his phone, tapping away at the screen before ultimately turning it back off and settling it back into its place in his pocket.
your phone vibrated beside you, screen lighting up with a bold alert.
[YUUTA OKKOTSU SENT $1000]
before you had a chance to even process the significance of the notification, he started back up,
“i hope i got the right information, wouldn’t want your hard work to get in the wrong hands.” the tilt of his head in tandem with a chuckle resonated sheepishly, and he returned to watch you through his camera lens.
he was right. the money did soothe your nerves.
“i’ve barely done anything yet.” a ditzy giggle followed soon after your sentence, a sound that yuuta couldn’t possibly ignore. you were already starting to pull at his heartstrings.
“and you’ve done it so perfectly,” his praise left you flustered in that moment and you bit down softly on your lower lip to keep your smile at bay. “thank you, yuuta.”
you would’ve never guessed that your introverted classmate had enough experience in him to be such a flirt, or have your cheeks heating up with fervid affection, no less. but maybe yuuta was just like that; maybe this had been natural.
“no, thank you.” his thumb hovered over the record button just as his eyes met your gaze over the brim of the camera. “would you like to start now?”
he took the nod of your head as confirmation to press the record button, finally getting started with the project.
you blinked blankly at him as he tilted his head and flashed a warmhearted grin. “how old are you?” was his first question. he had asked while rolling up the sleeves of his shirt. as he did so, you took notice of the silver ring donned around his finger.
he couldn’t have been married, no?
keeping your answer as vague as possible for the sake of matching his comforting warmth, you responded, “twenty-something.” he let out a satisfied huff of air as he nodded and moved onto his next query.
“and what’s your major?”
with the question barely having enough time to linger in the suggestively tense air, he added, “you’re very beautiful, by the way. do you mind taking your dress off for me?”
as much as it should’ve alarmed you, you were swayed by his toothachingly inviting timbre, its gentleness pulling compliancy from you in a matter of a few mere words. you only shook your head, forgoing the short piece of fabric that clung to each curve and dip of your body while your nipples hardened under the glacial, artificial breeze of his home. once the silk pooled at your hips, that, along with your panties were dropped onto the floor, leaving you bare and vulnerable under the camera — and yuuta’s watchful eye.
he swallowed thickly at the sight, remaining as respectful as he could despite the monster growing in his pants; his eyes locked right back onto yours as if he’d get striked down for moving them even a millimeter south. “are you a virgin?” he queried, opting to move his hand from awkwardly at his side to fidgeting with the button at his shirt, ultimately undoing it and revealing another inch of skin at his heated chest.
from the nature of what you had signed yourself up for, you were hesitant to answer his question. of course you needed experience to be a star, and with you lacking the preconceived ability, you could kiss your $1000 goodbye..
yet he looked at you with an expectant gaze. no traces of malice in his eyes or frustration from your quick witted silence, but merely, with patience. and in that moment you couldn’t find it within yourself to lie.
“i am,” out of shame, you curled in on yourself, hoping that the sofa would engulf you, and your feelings, crossing your arms over your bare chest as if it’d create a wall of privacy behind your own humiliation. “is that okay?”
yuuta’s being only grew warmer at the response, you figured he’d be hot to the touch by now, from searing pleasure or unshakeable cordiality, you wouldn’t know. “yeah, that’s okay,” it came out breathier than he would’ve liked, a telltale sign of his aching desire. “that’s more than okay.”
truth be told, he had never met anyone as enchanting as you. you looked up at him with such trust in your eyes that it daunted him — fear that the assurance he wielded from you would shatter beneath him, and he’d be drowning. in a sea of his own wistfulness. now that he had you, he couldn’t let you go.
you were on to make a breathtaking star.
now feeling less coy than before, you relaxed your head into the palm of yuuta’s hand. you hadn’t noticed how long he’d been stroking at your cheek, or when he closed the vexing proximity between the two of you, all that mattered in that moment was the roll of his gentle vocables flowing through your ears and the thumb of his that graciously caressed your cheek.
you came to realize that he was much more handsome this way as your eyes toured his own, then down to the sliver of sweat-sheened skin peeking from underneath the black veil of his shirt, then down to his…
he’s so fucking hard.
confined against his slacks was his cock that leaked an ample amount even while it was untouched. you could make out its silhouette, something girthy, perhaps heavy, but nothing like you’d expect from yuuta. uncharacteristically huge.
“yuuta.” you whispered, mainly to yourself, as your mouth began to water at the sight, and his cheeks dusted pink once he realized what you were fixated upon.
“do you wanna,” he started up but faltered soon after when your lidded gaze flitted back up towards his. never had he felt so weak before, it was as if you’d casted a spell on him. “do you maybe want to—” he paused to avert his own gaze and embarrassment. “—put it in your mouth?”
he could’ve sworn he heard the increase of his heartbeat in his ears when you crinkled your brows, pretty face forming into an even prettier pout.
“but i’ve never—”
he stopped you before you could start, interjecting his own voice of reassurance.
“it’s okay. i’ll guide you,” taking his camera off its stand and moving the rest of the configuration elsewhere, he held it in one hand to better capture the scene unfolding before him. “just try your best for me, okay?”
“okay.” when he returned your concern with a small smile, you took it upon yourself to undo the arrangement of his pants, carefully hooking your finger into the elastic waistband of his briefs and pulling down just enough for his length to spring free.
for what felt like minutes, you marveled at his sheer size, wondering how anyone of his nature could possibly be hiding something like that. it curved upwards with a prominent vein or two running up the underside while it continued to leak, so much so, that you had to collect it all at the tip with your finger.
the tip? flushed the prettiest pink you’d ever witnessed and was as bulbous as it was mushroomed, you knew you’d have a bit of difficulty trying to fit into your mouth. it seemed to twitch under the fanning of your breath to which yuuta let out a whine of pure impatience.
“can i..?” your words trailed off when you involuntarily found yourself pressing chaste kisses along the length of his cock until they met with his sticky tip; a recreated scene from the various porn videos you’d seen. the sensation sent a jolt of palpable pleasure through his being, yuuta’s dark hair curtaining over his eyes while he made a damn good attempt at silencing his moans, with his teeth sunken into his bottom lip.
your eyes kept watch at his wavering expression while you wrapped your hand at the base of his length and began to pump slowly, yet another thing you had learned through the fascinating world of porn.
“suck it,” it was clear to you that yuuta had grown desirously impatient from your teasing, looking down at you with a hint of hunger in his beautiful orbs. “please?”
you took his words as an incentive to finally give him what he’s been leaking for, wrapping gloss-sheened lips around the thick inches of his tip, accommodating for the stretch with a dulcet whine that reverberated deeply within him. had you not been caught up in building the gradual bob of your head, he would’ve kissed you, left you with smeared lips and a tongue that ached for only him upon seeing the sinful sight of innocent eyes fixated on his own. you’re beautiful. truly, to die for.
caught all on tape to be watched over and over again.
at the bliss, yuuta’s lip parted open, alotting for a slur of groans turned whimpers to tumble past. “you- you’re already doing, so good.” he praises, the words floating on his breath. his free hand finds itself back at your face, thumbing the warmth of your hallowed cheek while he captured the moment behind his lens. once you came to a comfortable rhythm, you couldn’t stop yourself from dipping your fingers between your thighs to ease the evergrowing ache in your core. in fact, you’d been like this since the moment yuuta spoke a word to you, lightheaded and malleable — what he’s beginning to love most about you.
your digits collected slick at your entrance, the immeasurable amount of essence that you’d pool providing ample leeway for you to sink three fingers inside, pumping at the same rhythm in which you’re sucking yuuta. soft fingertips curling against your gummy walls weren’t enough, though, and when he had caught notice of your weakening resolve, his hips involuntarily bucked into your mouth.
“sorry, ‘m sorry,” he began, with a choked moan. “just- so close, so fucking close. c-can you take me in deeper?”
the hum of assurance that sounded from you sent vibrations coursing through his cock, from tip to base. had you not been preoccupied with chasing your own high, you would’ve missed the pitchy moan he let out just after. with your palm now pressed up against your clit while you worked in tandem to pleasure the nub and your greedy hole, you attempted to swallow another stubborn inch of him.
simultaneous with the bobbing of your head, he matched your pace, abdomen flexing when the white-hot pleasure became too much and he could feel it in his ears. he wanted so badly to throw his head back, completely lose himself in bliss, but he had a job to do. he wouldn’t dare let the sight of your glassy lidded eyes and glossy lips struggling to wrap themselves around the stretch of his dick go unfilmed, unseen.
as his tip continued to prod the back of your throat and your fingers aided you in relieving the discomfort from your cunt, you found yourself just dangling off the dangerous edge of your release, strokes away from making a mess — and yuuta did too.
it wasn’t long until his head started spinning, legs got weaker, and his core coiled tighter; all the signs of a mindblowing orgasm, and blew his mind, you did. “baby- y/n, if you keep doing that- i might cum.” what he was referring to was the way you fondled his balls in the warmth of your soft hands, yet another trick you had learned from porn. “i don’t wanna cum in your mouth but if you—,”
a jumbled slew of curses flowed from his lips as he did the inevitable, shot his load deep down your throat, gently thrusting his cock in shallow strokes to jettison every last remaining drop. the taste on your tongue was nothing like you’d be warned of before. yuuta wasn’t bitter, he went down easy.
hell, you’d use his cum as a condiment for desserts if you could.
in a matter of moments, your own high had washed over you like cold water over a heated body, much needed and refreshing. once he hesitantly pulled out from the heat of your mouth, cock still hard and twitching for more, he gently pushed back strands of loose hair behind your ear.
“can i see?”
you held out your cream-slickened fingers, sopping with your juices as yuuta proceeded to catch how they dripped on camera. he then took your palm, with the cadence of a knight kissing the back of a princess’s hand, and slipped the soiled digits into his mouth. his tongue lavved around your index and middle fingers while he hummed satisfactorily at your taste. “you’re just as sweet as i imagined.” he smiled, finding amusement in your post-orgasmic, dazed state.
“do you do this with a lot of other girls, yuuta?” you queried, taking the time to scan your eyes over his face. it was as if he seemed to get more attractive as your time with him went on. he tilted his head slightly, finding your question endearing. “you’re my first, actually.” yuuta responded softly, as if his normal speaking voice would be too heavy on your delicate ears.
you jumped at the chance to tease him as he did you, placing your thumb back over the slit of his hard-on and lightly rubbing; which resonated within yuuta as a tonal mewl. a little smile pulled at your lips when you got your perfect reaction. “can you be my first?”
“i’d love to be,” he took your request with unadulterated honor as if he’d been tasked by the deities above to serve you. “just- just lay back for me. i promise i’ll take good care of you.”
and that you did; conforming to his call of request with such compliance it made his heart swell. you had positioned your body to rest languidly against the seat of the sofa, shaky legs hesitant to spread fully while your hand roamed up your sternum to find solace in kneading your tits.
he couldn’t deny how beautiful you looked, laid out for him as such. how had he been so lucky to be the only one to have the opportunity to marvel at the scene? with a steady hand, he faintly trails his hand up the expanse of your inner thigh, a silent beckon for you to open your legs wider. involuntarily so, your body had accepted his presence and allowed for the spreading of your thighs.
what you’d come to notice with yuuta was that he was watchful, observant. he seemed to pick up on every detail, even the minuscule bits that were most likely to fly over anyone else’s head, had been taken into account. it’s probably why he’s immensely proficient at what he does. not once had he allowed himself to miss the labored heaving of your chest, or the sheen of sweat thinly coating your body — the twitching of your clit when he stroked featherlight touches at the nub. he couldn’t call himself a true cameraman then.
his fingers had collected remnants of your previous orgasm before they worked in tandem, both middle and ring, to prod at your sensitive hole, slowly sinking themselves in. it was almost embarrassing how quickly your greedy cunt swallowed him in, as if it’d been waiting for his touch for years now. “y-yuuta, ‘m still sensitive.” you crooned in response to his digits exploring your cavern, plush walls gripping him with such tautness that he’d found it difficult to even curl his fingers.
his own mind spun (and cock leaked) at the thought of that same warmth around his length, and when you called his name, all he could think about was how pretty you’d sound moaning it. he wouldn’t mind if you were sonorous, if the neighbors would hear, if inumaki who lived downstairs would come knocking with a mouthful of complaints, if the whole world knew his name; because in that moment, yuuta okkotsu was yours.
yuuta okkotsu was in love.
after some shallow pumping, enough to have your legs attempting to enclose around his arm, yuuta had pulled his digits out and replaced the lost sensation with the fat tip of his cock stroking your slit up and down.
“i’m gonna put it in, okay? if you want me to stop, tell me. if i'm going too fast or slow, let me know.”
he perused your face for a hint of an answer, seemingly nothing going on behind your vacant, large eyes. your initial response was curt, an ode to the simplistic nature of your mind. “mhm.”
how endearing you were to him, just a unadorned reaction weakening his being, causing his heart to figuratively crumble within its confines against his ribcage. he had searched for a heartier answer, something tangible to hold on to, because, lord knows how terrible he’d feel if he took your indication the wrong way. “can you be vocal for me, please?”
you nodded your head. “i’ll let you know, yuuta.”
with a carefulness that only came from the most benign of beings, he had sunken the first inch of himself into your awaiting heat.
he was paused when your hand dashed to his lower abdomen, futilely pressing against the skin.
“wait—” you huffed wantonly. “—‘s too big.”
his eyes wavered with concern, hidden under the veil of pure arousal. in yuuta’s case he had dreamed of a compliment as self fulfilling as yours, for his thoughts of being average were shattered upon first inch. “should i stop?”
you shook your head, reveling in the light of his attentivity towards you and your body. “no,” you moved your hand from his abdomen. “don’t stop.”
one of his arms rested beside your head, helping to prop him up over your body while he dropped his head down to watch the way your bodies connected. gradually, the sight of his length slowly sinking inside, stretching you out further and further until he was in to the hilt flooded his vision. yuuta had caught on to your labored gasps, merely growing harder from your honeyed voice like music to his ears.
he then lifted his head, strands of inky, out-of-place tresses falling over his face and partially covering the depth of lingering eyes, that lingered for a second too long, causing that shuddering sensation you had once felt when you first met him to reappear. he held his camcorder beside his face, an all too cheerful grin masked over his features. “i’m all in!”
creepy.
there was no doubt that you hadn’t felt full. he practically spilled over with how much girth he possessed and throbbed innately within your walls. the swell of your tummy from just how deep he was, was enough to tear away at his composure and drag his length back before driving his hips in at a force unrecognizable to him. the yelp you had let out from his eager thrust dwindled into a blissful moan. “sorry, so sorry.” he whispered, unable to take his eyes off the faultless assortment of breathtaking features that was your face, eyebrows creased together, parted lips and eyes squeezed closed as if you’d been focused solely on the pleasure he was giving you.
his next thrust stroked softer than its predecessor, having no remnants of eagerness but instead, the nuance of a man that’d been simply smitten.
the meticulousness of his ministrations coursed through your body wondrously, each push and pull lathered in lust, savored to be remembered for the rest of his time on earth. it was as if he’d known your body for years, knew every dip and fold, every swell and mast, aware of what exactly it took to leave your body hungry for his touches.
you’d grown comfortable in the pace at which he set, your mind hazing over each time the blunt tip grazed along your gspot. he peppered kisses along your jaw and down your sternum, the fanning of his warm breath against your chest doing the minimum in stiffening the peaks of your breasts. shootable footage forgotten, yuuta took your mound into his mouth, teeth gently rolling against your nipple which caused you to tighten around his cock in response, the sweetest mewl he’s ever heard from you tumbling from your throat.
“at least take me on a date first, yuuta..” the wittiness of your voice had earned a stifled smile from him, finding utmost admiration in the suggestion. he’ll be sure to take you up on your offer, just as you had done for him.
when you felt the familiar coil within you starting to build up once more, you dipped your hand down to rub at your clit in tandem with the increasing vigor of his strokes. the sensation was all too foreign to you, too pleasurable that you couldn’t keep your sounds at bay. “‘m so close, g-gonna cum!” you had warned, yuuta pulled away from your tit with a soft pop. he chose to rest his head at the juncture of your neck and shoulder, mindlessly chanting the words like a mantra.
“i love you, i love you,” his pace faltered, growing sloppier by the second. “love you, love you so much.”
intoxicated by your heat, your scent, just you being you, and being so perfect — yuuta was pussydrunk. incredibly so. never in his life had he ever felt as high as you made him. you were an angel, sent to him from heaven, to defile and mark.
quickly, your release surged through you in torrents of ecstasy, nothing that you’ve experienced before, coating yuuta’s cock in the glorious essence of you. “cumming!” you cry, to no avail particularly since yuuta wasn’t wholeheartedly aware of the situation at hand. his mind was clouded with you, just as you were full of him, wincing in the aftershocks of your fervent orgasm and convulsing around his length with need.
it wasn’t long before his own ununified thrusts came to a sudden close, signifying the warm spurts of cum painting your insides, filling you entirely to the brim and leaking down your ass from riding out his high.
“god, i love you.” he whined, pressing faint kisses to your neck, unable to peel himself away from your fervid body. coming to your senses, his words finally resonated for you. “we only just met.”
he pulled himself up, opting to look down at your flushed face with a vague hint of confusion on his face as he tilted his head. “have we?”
“we have.” you nodded.
to yuuta, he’s known you his whole life. you were the light of his existence, the fire in his heart. had he managed to confuse you with someone else? surely, that wasn’t the case.
once he pulled out of you, he made sure to capture the moment that you leaked his seed on film, but in that time, borrowed jealousy had filled his soul. he couldn’t share the tape as he had planned, no one else deserved to see you in the same way he did. no one.
he tucked himself back into his pants, leaving you bare and oozing for just one second to fetch a warm wet rag to clean you up with. when he came back, you noticed just how chipper he’d gotten, if that were even possible. “you were amazing,” he smiled, gently wiping your folds pristine. “i’m so grateful you came to me.” the smile you returned matched his own, “thank you, you were- really good too.”
he perked up, eyes moving from between your thighs to your face. “really?” and when you nodded to him, you could see the apparent relief flow within his being. “you know,” he started. “i’m very interested in you.”
you tilt your head, jutting your lips in a cute pout. “interested, how?”
the camcorder that now resided on his coffee table, unpresumebly documenting the scene on display was picked up by yuuta, and turned off. he grinned softly, eyes shutting from his ear to ear smile.
“may i take you on a date?”
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comicaurora · 3 months
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wait, so what's goin on with JoCat? why are they the victim of the week?
This was a thing back in late 2023. JoCat received enough harassment for - and I cannot stress this enough - literally no reason that he left the internet entirely for several months with no promises to return. Some people called him weak for this, and those people are very lucky that I don't know where they live.
Everyone with a modicum of decency or empathy thought this was a huge tragedy and a failure of human goodness, and his absence was mourned across a staggering number of platforms even by people who only knew him by distant reputation. Of course, the people who think men shouldn't wear skirts or hairbows or express feelings thought this was a huge victory, and for reasons inexplicable to me, many self-declared online leftists seemed happy to side with those charming people in the triumph that they had successfully bullied and harassed a kind, sincere, GNC man so badly that he might have vanished from the internet forever. Apparently when it comes to punishing "cringe", no ally is too toxic to rally alongside.
With months to reflect and public opinion gradually catching up to the obvious conclusion that this was bullshit and should never have been allowed to happen, the handful of people who continue to act like their harassment campaign was in any way justified have mostly doubled down on "well I never said I WASN'T a huge dickhead" so they can pretty safely be ignored until they decide to start participating in the basic courtesy required for the human social contract again.
Thankfully Jo has held up pretty well with support from friends and loved ones, and has recently started being active online again. Putting himself back in the fray is an act of bravery I don't think I could match if I were in his shoes, but I'm glad he's feeling comfortable sharing the work he loves again, even if, in my opinion, the vast majority of the internet doesn't deserve that second chance.
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princessbrunette · 24 days
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⊹ ᜊ(ᜊ ´ ˘)੭ ♡ … SHARPEST TOOL ♡
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track five of the short n’sweet series. pairing: babydaddy!rafe x reader. based loosely on the song sharpest tool by sabrina carpenter. enjoy! ໒꒰՞ ܸ. .ܸ՞꒱ა
it’s not like you expected a marriage proposal or anything.
rafe was going to be rafe, you knew that— it was the whole reason he was your babydaddy and not your husband or even boyfriend. the cameron man was bright where it counted but not even nearly emotionally equipped enough to handle the trials and tribulations of an adult relationship paired with a baby. he got the baby on fridays and tuesdays. that was the agreement.
but that didn’t mean you didn’t see him inbetween.
“mmh, fuck— s’mine isn’t it? huh? c’mon—” rafe cups your chin, encouraging you to speak words that were incoherent whines as he drives his cock repeatedly through your gummy walls.
“yours, still yours rafey.”
god, you’d think the two of you were still together. it was sex talk, nothing more nothing less — you assumed anyway. unfortunately, due to unforeseen circumstances in your love life, and the fact you were somewhat soul tied to the cameron boy, you meant every word. there was no way he felt the same, merely doing you a favour even — due to your raging hormones post pregnancy recovery that were adjacent to a teenage boys. he was helping you out.
“this pussy is — goddamn, still as good as the first time i fucked it.” he groans into your neck because you know he’s close.
you roll your hips, forever trying to please him.
as aforementioned, it’s not like you expected him to suddenly come forward with a proposal after he’d finished into the condom. he drops a kiss to your temple like always, cleans himself off in the bathroom, awkwardly stands in your door making small talk, and occasionally decides that then is the time to drop your wad of allowance money that he gives you for raising his kid. you told him to stop putting money on your dresser after sex because it made you feel like a ‘paid service’. he rolled his eyes.
the problem didn’t lie with how rafe treat you within the four walls of your bedroom. rafe was going to be rafe, and that was that. it was how he’d behave upon seeing you in public. you’d think the two of you were merely strangers. if you were to stroll through the country club where you rightfully belong just as much as him, he’d turn his back, look away. like he’d forgotten everything.
at this point, you couldn’t tell if he was nonchalant or just plain stupid. you couldn’t keep chasing the feeling of the rare little nod of acknowledgement he’d send your way when you’d accidentally lock eyes. he wasn’t ashamed of the situation, no — you’d seen him proudly walk around the club with his little girl in his arms, letting everyone surround them, fawn over them. it was you that got left behind.
you’d decided enough was enough, coming to the conclusion you’d ignore him right back. it was approaching the weekend, and you knew you’d have to see him — so you prepared yourself to be strong. resilient. play him at his own game. you were simply there to drop off the baby and go home.
rafe comes and stands by you at the country club bar on a thursday evening.
“usual time tomorrow?” he nudges you gently with his arm, and you were shocked he was even speaking to you. not allowing the shock to cause you to jump straight into friendly conversation, you stare ahead.
“yep.”
“alright…yeah, yeah…” he nods, itching his cheek, eyes glancing back over to you. “i assume you uh, you’re gonna want something to help get you right huh? nothing some dick can’t fix…” you can hear the smirk on his voice and you exhale shakily, not wanting to react in the usual pavlovian way with your panties practically dropping.
so you say nothing. you stare ahead.
the bartender brings his beer, and yet he stays, staring at your profile. “a’ight… fucks a’matter with you?”
“you clearly don’t care, you can skip the formalities.” you find yourself spitting out before you can help yourself. he stares for another moment before he scoffs.
“the fucks your problem, little miss attitude?” he drawls, blinking in irritation but your order comes and you take it and walk away. he doesn’t chase you, of course not.
you drop the baby off the next day, and he tries his luck again, welcoming you inside wearing grey sweats. “c’mon.” he croons quietly, nodding his head inside after you’d got the sleeping baby situated and you stand up straight, look him in the eye, and smile.
“so you can treat me like i’m not a person afterwards? i think i’ll pass.” you turn your daughter, blowing her a kiss. “bye baby, mommy will see you tomorrow.” rafe stares after you, watching you go.
to answer your previous pondering, it turned out rafe was more stupid than he was nonchalant. truth be told, he hadn’t realised he’d been acting all that much differently. you were co-parenting, not a couple — so he figured his time at the country club was his time and yours was yours. he didn’t wanna bother you a whole bunch and put you off visiting.
but the dots were starting to connect, and rafe remembered that women do infact need more emotional stimulation to live happily beside you — and he’d be damned if he weren’t to look after the mother of his child properly. if that’s what you needed, he’d be happy to play ball.
the two of you don’t say much to eachother when you pick the baby up the next day, yet when monday rolls around, and you step into the country club with three of your friends to discuss an upcoming event — rafe cameron doesn’t waste any time.
he cuts topper off mid conversation, holding up a dismissive hand as soon as his eyes meet you and he begins to swagger over to you in his usual aggressive and demanding manner. you think he’s about to give you an earful infront of your friends so you stop nervously, brow creasing. however, when he reaches you — he grips you and brings his lips to yours, cutting off any potential confused greeting on your tongue with a kiss.
“gonna stop pouting about this whole thing now? huh?” he raises his eyebrows and you blink up at him, turning to your friends and shooing them to their table. turning back, you eye him.
“why did you—”
“you think i don’t care about you, that’s it right? like — like i don’t supply your ass with endless money, threaten any asshole that tries to make a move on you, defend you like my god damn life depends on it, fuck you when you need it? hm? nah, nah you really think—”
“wait, who do you threaten?”
“thats— ahh… thats not important, alright?” he scratches his temple, buzzcut bristling against his blunt fingernails as he quickly wets his lips with his tongue. “i didn’t know i was fucking up. okay?” his drags out his version of an apology and you feel the tiniest smile creeping up on you. it was pathetic, really.
“i just didn’t want you to be ashamed of me.” you sigh, looking down and he’s lightly gripping your chin immediately so you looked up at him when he spoke. old habits die hard.
“i’m not. you think i’d put a baby in someone i was ashamed of? that shits for the pogues.”
“rafe.”
“look,” he pulls his sunglasses on over his eyes and wraps an arm around you, the two of you now looking out over the club. the eyes of his friends and yours are quickly averted, having being watching the entire interaction. “i don’t know what more you want, okay i’m— i haven’t done this before. i don’t know if you’re aware but i haven’t had a kid before. this shit is my first fuckin’ rodeo too.” he turns to look down at you through the dark frames, a serious and promising look on his face. “but whatever i need to do… to keep that little attitude at bay, i’ll make shit happen. yeah? even if i gotta fuck you infront’a the whole club.”
he might not have been the sharpest tool, but he knew what you wanted to hear.
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