#in any case ... always a big fan of What Are We hcs ... shit makes me laugh forever ...

[xxplastic-cubexx]

maybe controversial take, but i like to think of erik being mostly a huge ladies’ man (look at all the bitches he gets canonically, he can’t NOT love the ladies) but charles is just...... this HUGE exception, lmfao. for a while he was totally oblivious to the fact that he was into charles like that but then one day it smacked him HARD across the face that their Very Special Friendship is actually romantic. he’s since embraced being a bisexual disaster but before charles he had no clue.

would be even funnier if erik and charles had already fooled around a couple times before erik actually realized he was attracted to him. who among us hasn’t fucked their completely platonic bro??

it cant be a controversial take if youre onto something my friend .....

[desire-mona]

dps boys hcs! this has been requested of me! lets make it modern bc thatll be fun

- todd absolutely DESPISES "booktok" and its addiction to smut. can go on a VERY long rant abt how only reading things with sex scenes is, in fact, a porn addiction.

- knox has tried on many occasions to become an influencer, failing every single time and blaming it on the algorithm or whaver

- neil, type of mother fucker to not be on social media like at all. has one private instagram that he posts on maybe twice a year, and has a tiktok only to watch the videos todd intermittently sends him.

- ^^^ followed immediately by a text saying "i sent you a tiktok go look at it" which always sparks a mini argument about whether or not its easier to just save the video and text it to him. goes nowhere every time.

- meeks has fashion taste that makes him look insufferable, band tee's and the worst jeans you ever did see, exclusively. also modern meeks would have clear glasses frames.

- saw someone say charlie would vape, id like to add to that. has a COLLECTION of elf bars, its vast, its colourful, it's annoying, it's turning his coughs wet.

- pitts was a fast fashion guy for a total of 6 months before finding out all the shit about how unethical the industry is. didnt get rid of any of those clothes bc thats wasteful but he IS fighting for his life whenever anyone looks at his wardrobe.

- cameron is a BIG analog horror fan, local 58, walten files, fnaf tapes, thats his jam. can we popularise cam being a big horror fan in general bc im so attached to that hc. horror cam i love u.

- all the boys have a life360 circle (enforced by cam and pitts due to charlie's horrendous reckless driving) and todd CONSTANTLY needs to be yelled at the charge his phone.

- neil's phone is ANCIENT, had the same one for nearly a decade, and its evident. has a bigass crack right down the middle, the back is shattered and held together with tape, a phone case, and a dream. theres marks from shit burning into the screen, most notably a rectangle in the bottom corner from the billions of facetime calls with todd that ultimately set his phone on fire every time.

- todd is secretly a grade A yapper but ONLY in digital form. his online presence is VAST, but impressively anonymous. has a very active substack, letterboxd, poetry tumblr, and even started his own blog. no, not a tumblr blog, a blog blog.

- charlie's car is decked out in the most idiotic add ons that you can think of. comically large mirror dice, a bumper sticker that says "honk if you want me bad", stupid car door lights that project a photo of jimmy fallon onto the ground when u open them, the whole 9 yards. took neil, pitts, and cameron 20 minutes to talk him out of getting flame decals (as a bit.)

- knox refuses to play any other videogame besides GTA, which he plays concerningly often. if ur having trouble reaching him then odds are hes on GTA. its the only hobby of his that his parents know about. christmas is tough for the overstreets.

- meeks is well aware of his general ☝️🤓 demeanour so he started making jokes about it before anyone else can. any time he says anything remotely smart sounding then he MUST do the voice and put up a finger. it became a force of habit and he did it while talking to a teacher once, he left the room mortified.

- pittsie lives on spotify, he has a playlist for every possible emotion, over 3k liked songs, and 200k+ minutes listened when wrapped season rolls around. additionally he does every spotify stat game available, and forced the boys to download a spotify activity widget thing. (WHAT DO YALL KNOW ABT AIRBUDS ‼️‼️ add me @ monahatesya xoxo)

- cam loves to make jokes about DARE and the "this is ur brain on drugs" ads but he is, in fact, the main demographic of said ads. said this before, saying it now, will most definitely say it again, he is beyond susceptible to peer pressure. marijuana isnt a gateway drug for everyone but it certainly is for him.

bonus! chris and keating! just for you!

- chris is avoiding the lesbian masterdoc purely out of fear. not out of fear of being gay, but out of fear of the sheer amount of subsequent other things she'll likely also have to find out about herself.

- keating spends an inordinate amount of time on youtube, which nobody actually expects. big video essay fan, imagine the shock from the boys when he pulls up youtube for a lesson and he's halfway thru the 4 hour iBinged iCarly video. was previously a james somerton fan but considering... the james somerton part.. hes now a defunctland loyalist.

[mikeellee]

Thank you! This is more believable and realistic than "we all hate QUIRKLESS!" Like they harmed people who have quirks too. Izumi in my fic was "lucky" in a sense. She has her horrific scars thanks to violence but there are kids in the hospital bc of bk. Aldera cover up bc sure BK will be the next big thing...his behavior will change in a pass of magic. Its greedy! Nothing more. Bk is from a rich family and has a good quirk...they can see a future in him. Well, there is future and is not a bright one.

Considering how HC owns Japan, it's up to them. The more elegant solution, in my opinion, would be to revamp the school completely, sort exorcising any lingering identity of aldera and give a new school to the people with new staff and a new principal.

Hm...not a fan of making Aizawa a creep like that, bc for all his faults ...he is not a perv (I do find odd how the girls believe Aizawa would want them to wear the cheerleader outfit) I do think, in my humble opinion, the creepy factor is not in Aizawa fucking Shinso. Its on the fact he is grooming him to be a mini me. Shinso isn't his student but he is taking time for him out of everyone. Its just like Nighteye and Mirio. There no sex involved but he is messing with Shinso's head and playing with her "I'm the victim" mentality. I have no idea why he would be so hung up on Shinso. I really don't...but it's his pet project. Fuck the rest. (He really wants Shinso to be a mini me to the point Shinso is dressing up like him, talking like him. Its ... uncomfortable. Shoto saying "is Shino Aizawa's secret love child?" Adds a special type of creep)

I joked about that and BK does act like Aizawa's bully. I forget his name. again, can't see. Aizawa fucking his students but I can see him recreating his childhood with them and Aizawa is a bullying victim who thinks his abuser was in the right. Brutal force is the best. He protects BK and is always the first to stand up - think of the press conference where Aizawa raise to defend the PoS. You will always see him defending his fav students and his bully. Present Mic has a really shit friend. (Wouldn't even call as such)

Midnight is also a creep towards her students and I can see her sleeping around with students.

As for Aizawa's punishment in my fic, his career will be ruined but here the thing...he never gave a damn about fame or anything...he will,.however, have to deal with his former students...villains who are going to kill. His quirk erasure is powerful but what's the point in erasing a quirk if the person is coming to punch your face? Izumi told all of them how erasure works and...well, it's up to them. Its up to the logical man Eraserhead to survive.

Same! Mirio is a sad case. Could he break free of the brainwash? Sure but it would need a process for that. Maybe hearing how Nighteye has a plan B in case Mirio fails. Its predatory their relationship - their friends don't like Nighteye - bc while there no sexual relationship... nighteye is the source of income Mirio has...Mirio is a poor student who has one struggling father. Nighteye is the reason why Mirio has everything...why he wouldn't be loyal?

On that front, controversy take: I don't think Ochako is poor, at least not in the fanon way. The way I see ...her family was mega rich but lost money and now they are just rich. Why I say this? They can afford their daughter to have an apartment for herself. In my idea, Ochako saw the "downgrade" and got worried and did the selfless thing ...her parents didn't stop her (either is greedy or they want their kid to be a hero, you pick)

Izumi being attracted to him while he has the mask...is pretty hot. She likes his eyes, she likes how he is so confident but there no arrogance (not like BK's)

Izumi sighs and grabs her wet hair and twisted so to dry faster, she sighs. "I'm wet again"

Cinder is having many thoughts with this line.

On the seltzer bunny 🐰 fic I finally have an outline for the first chapter. And yes, Cinder does make an appearance. Ok my idea is basically Izumi makes Aldera her first target.

It doesn't make a big target if you see with western eyes but in Japan, teachers are respected so...Izumi showing how aldera is corrupt is a big deal, many eyes are on her and aldera.

Izumi's crimes:

Breaking in

Invasion of propriety

Identity thief

Hacking

But she exposes Aldera as it is. She ruins their lives as they ruined hers and the others. No Redestro is used nor they are anti QUIRKLESS...here they are willing to sacrifice everyone for BK (and BK is ranking bellow Mineta) and didn't spare a second (hm, this au is set UA is a colleague and they DO use the image of the students to create polls and whatnot.

You read that right ...Bk ranks bellow Mineta.

The first thing in this chapter is how Izumi is walking among the rain. She is wet and I do like this small nudge to the talks we had about what would tease Cinder...Izumi will say the phrase "I'm wet" a lot.

As for Cinder...he hears about the Usagi(means bunny) and is curious...he is not sure if she is real or if the Aldera's staff is making things up. Their crimes do make others educators frown at them...their careers are over and so is Aldera. A new school will born.

Cinder is not a fan of corrupt schools and finds aldera really stupid but if this bunny is real...that's interesting.

Cinder: if we are to meet, we will.

(I love put those lil moments here and there. Hints to the couple. Again, she says "I'm wet a lot" and is not an innuendo until it is)

Izumi is planning her next move. Nighteye. Everyone is motivated by revenge in the team. I label them "team found family revenge" lol

Congrats for the progress with your story! I want to read it as soon you publish the chapters, so let me know when that happens.

I'm aware of how Japan culturally holds a lot more respect and give importance to education than the west. Ngl I kinda admire them for that, for story porpuse I get what you try to make.

And since you're ruining the lifes of bad teachers do you have some plans for Aizawa next? I think you didn't like him that much either.

Lol isn't weird at all that Mineta should classify better than BK, as after all besides the stalker stuff and such Mineta is capable of having human decency and interact with other people normally. He also smarter according to canon and his worst tendencies became pretty tame later on.

The "I'm wet" is going to take a new meaning later lol. But I'm here for the slowburn so this sounds interesting.

So you dislike Nighteye? Yeah he's not a very likeable character tbh.

[postmodernbeing]

Shingeki no Kyojin Headcanons: 104th training corps (College AU - Outfits pt II)

Part I | College AU HCs

Part II of the outfits/aesthetics headcanons - College AU that would (kinda) be included in the oneshot I'm working on.

IMPORTANT: I do not own Shingeki no Kyojin nor the trend of this outfits-displays, only this HCs belong to me. // Contains spoilers (for the icons that I used in some characters) // English is not my first language, so I ask for your patience and understanding.

Historia Reiss

She has a huge wardrobe and so well organized by color, textures, and sizes. From halter tops to maxi dresses, our queen really dresses like one.

Forever in love with skirts and dresses with patterns and/or pastel colors. But don’t get confused, girl has range.

So, one could see her wearing monochromatic ensembles one day and the other, she’s all dressed up with some bright color pieces matching a patterned shirt.

Also owns a vast collection of jewelry and accessories both original and classy. And let’s not forget the shoes: sneakers, heels, boots, sandals and cute little anklets to match. I swear she can make crocs look boujee.

Contrary to what people think, she doesn’t support fast fashion industry. Aware of her privilege, she knows she has the money and time to buy from small businesses and keep herself trendy.

Last but not least, and kind of clothing related: Historia loves taking Ymir to thrift shopping dates and later go eating at some indie cafeteria. The lifestyle is also part of the outfit, alright?

Ymir

Her wardrobe consists in comfortable clothes and not giving a fuck. All her clothes give Rockstar lesbian vibes (stan this queen). Her designated color palette is based on dark shades, so it’s a real contrast between her outfits and Historia’s.

Loves combat boots and her wasted Converse TM, although her favorite pieces from her apparel are bomber jackets, coats, sweaters, and hoodies.

Ymir also wears a fair amount of stainless-steel accessories, mostly chunky rings and chains. Moreover, is common to find her listening to music, therefore, earphones are a fashion statement really.

Speaking about must-wear, this girl likes to paint her nails black but due her anxiety she tends to scratch the painting off so it gives this grunge look (don’t romanticize this fellas).

Historia would suggest her some trends or give her advice about color, but being honest, Ymir has a very well-defined style at this point.

Now, about her dress style: She won’t dress like a metalhead nor grunge (at least not intentionally). And she wouldn’t define her style as dark, it’s just what it is.

Reiner Braun

He wears lots of denim in jackets and jeans but also owns a couple of dress pants that combines with beanies or simple caps. Also, has plenty of plain simple shirts that fit his strong body.

Reiner usually wears opaque shades of all colors. Another fact, he’s not a big fan of patterns unless we’re talking about sweaters. He also wears jackets yet avoids cardigans and hoodies.

A very important thing to know, Reiner has a lot of gym clothes, he works out daily so don’t be surprised.

Most of those clothes are joggers, pants, shorts, and t-shirts that look as if he ripped them off or something.

Actually, a lot of his clothes look like they’re about to be ripped apart due his huge ass pectorals (please, Reiner, let me rest gently on your pecs). Just kidding, his whole wardrobe fits him perfectly.

Finally, if Reiner had to define his style in a sentence, he’d probably acknowledge that he gives the impression of a rich a-hole, but really, Rei just likes to be comfortable and presentable at all times. So, rich white guy it is for now.

Bertolt Hoover

Bertie is that one friend that always carries a cardigan or sweater just in case, also because he tends to lend his clothes if a friend of his is in need. So thoughtful, our big baby.

His wardrobe is amazingly well organized, and its color palette is unmatched. Lots of blue, brown, beige, white and black.

We know he’s tall enough to call everybody’s attention every time he enters a room. And being as shy as he can be, he avoids brilliant colors or striking pieces. Instead, he chooses simpler outfits.

Bertolt follows this formula every time: pants, shirt, sweater. Everything clean and discrete.

Now if we must talk about his shoes, Berts prefers some white sneakers or modest dress shoes. He wouldn’t say he owns a vast collection, rather, he keeps a fair amount for different occasions.

No tattoos nor piercings. Speaking of which, it’s so rare to see him wearing any accessories at all. Maybe he'll carry with him an analogical clock, and that's it. Although if someone gave him a friendship bracelet you can be sure he'll wear it all-the-time.

Annie Leonhart

Lots of denim for her jackets and jeans. Hoodies, bands merch and graphic t-shirts.

Her clothes’ color palette has range but nothing too pastel or colorful. Instead, she gets all the opaque version of the pieces she likes.

Not that Annie hates dresses or skirts, it’s just unusual for her to even think about wearing them. She prioritizes being comfortable, and tight/short clothes can’t provide her that feeling.

Hates slim clothes unless it’s a tank top or something similar. She just prefers oversized hoodies and mom jeans. Also, if Annie can avoid skinny pants, you can be sure she will.

Owns a fair amount of gym clothes because she also likes to train but most of the times, you’ll see her running around campus, really. She’s a simple woman with simple pleasures.

Annie is the personification of ‘looks like she could kill you, is an actual cinnamon roll’, from her attitude to her clothes. So beware, for she’s the queen of looking rude with her chains around her belt, and her ring to match but don't let her fool- holy shit, that thing can actually stab someone. As I was mentioning, such a sweet gal, isn’t she?

Hitch Dreyse

She can make it boujee with so little effort (and money), lemme tell you. Wears her clothes with such an attitude and class. Hitch's an actual wine-mom, or aunt maybe? she gives those vibes.

People have the impression from her style, that her parents are rich, but nothing could be further from the truth. It’s just that Hitch knows how to dress. (Also, we know that for a fact sis has a scholarship, okay?) ANYWAYS,

Miss here is forever in love with white and baby blue. Owns plenty of jeans but also dress pants and culottes that wears with blazers or shirts that make her look like a princess with a diversity of fabrics such as satin, silk-alike texture, and cotton.

Hitch is the queen of heels. Although she hates very high ones, she rocks shorter heels and walks in them with little to no effort. Or at least looks like it. All of her shoes are classy yet unique.

Now, let’s talk about her collection of accessories. Hitch likes her jewels in gold and only buys signature pieces: rings, earrings (for her four lobe perforations, two in each ear) and necklaces, of course. Yes, it is gold but in modest designs. Sounds fair, right?

Marlowe Freudenberg

Our big boy in here thinks that he should look presentable at all times since he’s the Chief Editor of the History student’s academic journal at Paradis’ Uni. Not that he cares a lot of his appearance, really.

And that’s actually cute because he puts effort into his outfits. Marlowe would be one of those straight guys that are hygienic and know how to dress and has no fragile masculinity.

Cologne is a must and part of his attire just like handkerchiefs are, because at the same time, he was raised to be the classic gentleman TM.

Marlowe dresses in all colors; he can’t choose a favorite one or a never-changing palette. He’s aware of season colors too and plays that at his wardrobe favor.

Yet for his outfits he’d follow few simple rules: oxfords (cleaned), dress pants (somewhere between slim fit and straight leg), some polo/dress shirt/cotton thing-y for top and a sweater / cardigan / blazer if season demands it.

Finally, our favorite student-editor spends some time of his routine shaving his face and styling his hair, albeit wouldn’t consider himself a vain guy nor full of himself. Lowkey expects Hitch to notice his appearance. Such a sweetheart.

[batarangsoundsdumb]

guess fucking what? my inbox is so fucking full right now i'm unloading all of this shit in one post.

For the 11th gotham memes: gothamites react to bruce being jacked in a tiktok he made with kids, like super yoked, ripped as hell

fucking hilarious thanks. i think i did it in one meme post, but i genuinely don't remember which one

i dunno which of the batfam would do this but one time i was sleeping over at a friends house and ended up on the floor bc the bed was so very small and i just stayed there because the rug was soft

that's a drunk jason move i don't know what to tell you

tim and jason are "i listen to pop punk" solidarity. whenever jason highjacks the batmobile theyll go on long ass car rides blaring mcr and paramore and then never talk about it again

as they should!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! tim: no jason it's my turn using the aux cord i gotta put on my jams jason: don't you dare put on weird shit tim: don't worry, you're gonna love this *plays fearless (taylor's version)

hear me out hear me out, red hood stans 🤝 nightwing stans t h i g h s

holy shit yes.

SNL au: Bruce breaks character when pretending to superman and says something like "I'm not superman! You've seen his gps!! It's from 2001!!!" @sabeanybabe

superman flies past the snl building the next day just to say 'actually it's from 2005, i'm not a heathen'

does your back hurt from carrying the batfam fandom

it hurts more from the exotic rock collection i keep in my backpack, but thanks for the concern.

I love your posts by why would you always leave the best parts in the tags?

as a treat for the people that check the tags ;) (and also because i'm committed to the short post aesthetic)

somehow your playlist was everything i never knew i needed. i mean it. this is my new favorite playlist.

and don't you dare get a new favourite playlist!

babe ur stoner tim playlist is exactly too perfect, earth is literally blessed by ur existence

babe thanks so much! i love my stoner tim playlist because it's just my usual playlist but people think it's an artistic choice that i put taylor swift and britney spears in there, when it's just what i unironically like listening to

JANDKSKDK BILLY RAY CYRUS ON THE STONER TIM PLAYLIST I LOVE IT IT

again it's not even an ironic choice, i know every single word and i genuinely like the song

The last chapter of Fundamentals of Casework has me crying at work. Thanks I love it @dudelookitsalesbian

oh babe, i'm sorry, but also, not sorry i love chapter 4 so much it's my lovechild with the 'mental illness' tag

soooo....stumbled on your tumblr by some stroke of fate??? read your DC fanfic first. which is PHENOMENAL btw. then found all the batmemes; the funniest thing EVER bc everyone forgets about regular old gothamites. kept scrolling and your blog pops up as recommended. clicked on the ao3 for shits and giggles and waddaya know?!?!? it's YOU!!! you're LEGEND!!!! ever seen that meme? it's a video of a cat that got into a baseball field and the two announcers get really invested in his escape attempt and start giving a play by play of the cat instead of the game. memeable moment: "GREAT stuff from the Cat!!!"

i seriously think about this ask every single day and it's so fucking funny to me that i've never seen the meme you're referencing, but i still find myself going 'GREAT stuff from the Cat!!!' whenever i see something funny. but wow i'm glad you liked this steaming pile of garbage

Fav dc character overall? And fav batfamily character?

don't ask me to pick between the loves of my life, but i can tell you i've cried about every single batfamily member and also wally west (my beloved)

What's your opinion on fans having a problem with batfam being "too big"? And some even claim that batfam is just "Bruce Alfred Dick Damian" and the rest of them are just "friends and allies" (source: reddit) Personally, I like batfam because of this reason but idk

stupid. a family can never be too big. i'm not that big a fan of like huge batfam stuff with everybody from every single universe, because as much as it's funny for bruce to have like 30 kids, it just feels a little too OOC for me.

This is the best tag I've seen involving the batfam, thanks for thinking of it

This is canon now @nctxrejects

lmao yeah i think at that point alfred has had to sit through like at least a dozen coming out talks and just has a pride flag collection in the attic that he pulls out whenever a kid comes out

idk why batfam hits different as compared to any other superhero family

bc it's found family and usually the other superhero families are almost all genetically related in one way or another

I don't know if you watch the umbrella academy but I saw your last post about batcest and saw the similarities. But the thing is (although I think it's weird) in TUA, they addressed it by saying "they were raised as weapons, not siblings" or something along those lines, which is simply not the case with batfam.

yeah i watched tua but i also thought it was ridiculous and they still treated each other as siblings so i didn't like the luthor/allison thing, and am glad they stopped doing that shit bc it fucking sucked.

Hot take: Batcest shippers are the same people who believe adopted siblings are not actual siblings

smoking hot take: batcest shippers are the people who watch 'my sister got stuck in the washing machine' porn

Duke was adopted by Bruce?

not technically no, but do i, tumblr user batarangsoundsdumb, look like i care?

True story but I had to change my freaking name because it used to be "Damien" and most people would go "OH LIKE DAMIAN WAYNE" like please I'm just tryna live

true story, but i don't actually think of damian when i hear the name damian, literally the first thing that pops up is damian darkh like bruh what?

apparently dc comics company supported comic stores by giving out new titles and stuff during the beginning of the pandemic to help them run and I just think that's wholesome

ah yeah that's so fucking cool, still don't like dc, the company, because this world is a capitalist hellhole and we're all owned by warner brothers or disney with no in between.

ayo looking at tumblr head canons and finding out bruce is actually a terrible father is a punch in the gut

lmao yes, in like 50% of comics bruce is a terrible father and it gives me whiplash

oooh I just saw the jason todd vs winter soldier post and the real question is: batman vs iron man

while iron man has like hundreds of cases of armor, batman could throw out an emp and have the guy dropping out of the sky in 2 seconds.

dickfast = fastdick = quickdick = quickie

magnum hot take

hey bata(?) just thought I'd let you know I have copied the obnoxious emoji and Billy Ray post for use on simping men going forth

thank you 😘🌷 (@spacebarsidecar)

why would you do that to your followers???? i get why i did it, but why would you???

what is scarecrow made the nightwing funko pop himself, like those diy-ers that paint over other ones

oh god no, horrible take, horrible take, that's a disgusting thought oh no

I see your HC that Bruce and Oliver fucked and raise you this: Dick and Roy ALSO fucked

yes they did and it was a horrible moment for jason to find out dick has fucked both of his best friends

"at this rate bruce adds like 1 child to his family every decade or so" Duke is introduced in 2013, Damian as Damian, not as an unnamed child, in 2006. And he is already 14 years old, Robins rarely remain Robins after 16 😬 It looks like a new Robin and Batkid will appear in a couple of years

i mean i can't wait? but somebody will probably die first tho, we're due for another major character death. my money's on either cass or duke this time.

BRO you're so right all of your Bruce's ex headcanons are amazing but they aren't ships, that's kinda wild. Like I don't want any peeks into how their relationship was I just want to see everyone make fun of them

lmao YES it's just i love bruce being a slut, like good for him.

I am in love with your posts your honour thank you

omg thanks are we like,, gonna kiss now?

The justice league needs to have a meeting to discuss how many of their members/partners have slept with bruce. Because through a combination of cannon & fannon (if DC wasn’t homophobic) we have AT LEAST: 1) clark 2) lois 3) oliver 4) dinah 5) john

Thats not counting villains or random civilians @dudelookitsalesbian

yes yes yes, they'll have a yearly meeting about how many of their collective exes could be out for revenge and batman's list just keeps getting longer.

tim was like "i'm drake now" and everyone was like ahh so your fursona is a dragon and tim was like pffffft no. ducks.

and what about it?

when steph's fighting livewire and she zaps her with lighting and nothing happens and then they both just. stand there awkwardly for a second and talk. yeah i couldn't stop laughing at that batgirl steph is the BEST

oh yeah that was fucking hilarious and i think it would be so cool and sexy of dc to give steph a little comic series,,, as a treat

Hi I absolutely adore all of yours "Bruce and Oliver very badly pretending they didn't fuck each other" memes

lmao i do too

I need you to know that “Bruce Wayne had frosted tips” is one of my favorite Bruce takes of all time it’s so galaxy brained. you’re right and you should say it

he also painted his hair blonde once when he was travelling and in conclusion, this is why he's being blackmailed by the gotham gazette.

you know my thing about gordon being branded as the only good cop in gotham is its a load of shit like arguably he's a good person and not working to screw people over or anything but the fact that he also works w. batman makes him a shit cop. like yea batman is better than the mob but its still illegal its still an abuse of power he just not making bank

babe, all cops are bad cops. (but yeah youre absolutely right, working with vigilantes makes you a shit cop, but also working against vigilantes just makes you an asshole cop yanno?)

ruh roh i think i’m about to add “so not yeehaw” every time i don’t like something

that's a very good vocabulary upgrade

somehow i feel like steph already knew. like babs obviously knew but i feel like bruce got high/drunk in front of steph and started telling his boarding school stories and steph was just like “oh you fucked up i’m never gonna forget this”

steph and bruce have weird uncle/rebellious niece dynamic and they just hang out sometimes and bruce will be like 'i once broke my arm when i tripped over a hedge when i was drunk so oliver drove me to the hospital on an electric scooter' and steph will just have to sit there with that knowledge in her head.

Hello I just wanted to tell you you are So right in all your steph opinions bc she is, in fact amazing and I think that's very sexy of you. Ps. Your Bruce/Oliver fic is hilarious

babe, thank you so much and yes steph is amazing and i love her and she deserves the world and she's the best member of the batfam hands down. also thanks

In Supersons we see a couple of kids that are implied to be Damian and Jon's children and the boy has laser eyes and can fly, so I asume he's not adopted. The girl, who calls Bruce grandpa, can also fly, btw. So it's canon (probably by accident) that Jon can have kids and he must have married one of Bruce's kids. (I'm hoping for Damian, mostly because any other of his children would be waaaaaaaaaaaaay too old.) @artemisa97

lmao that was probably an accident seeing as jon is a 17 year old superhero in the year 3000 (by the jonas brothers)

You know, I'm a die hard fan of your memes, but I gotta say one thing: if Gothamites actually took gas mask everywhere with them, then the Scarecrow would just be a weird dude in a weird costume, and not a villain oh so scary. DC really should just takes notes from you.

bold of you to assume there's no gothamite anti-maskers

How does it feel being the funniest person on this app?

horrible, next question.

I can't listen to Green Day or Billy Joel without thinking of your post about how Bruce got arrested at a Billy Joel concert @nightwings-kid

yeah that's your mistake, i on the other hand can't enjoy billy joel without thinking about the glee rendition of 'uptown girl'

I've FINALLY been watching the Batman animated series and I gotta say, after watching "the gray ghost" I am CONVINCED that Batman is a closeted super hero geek who was 100% freaking out the first time he met Superman and is just REALLY good at hiding it.

superman: so what do you do in your free time? batman, thinking about the superman fanfiction he's writing on the batcomputer: i have no free time

bruce and oliver be like boyfriends to co-workers 401k (do the justice leagues get 401ks??? not that bruce and ollie would need them, but-)

lmao yes just 400 thousand words of bruce realising 'oh dip oliver is such a fucking dumbass' (also i don't know what a 401 k is but i assume they don't?)

Gothamites would totally boo superman as he saves Gotham while batman is out. @meenje

he's like 'okay think about that next time you want to be saved from an alien octopus'

I just took long break from dc comics and I come back to see ric grayson ??

i think it's very cool and sexy of dc to see dick and just think 'you know what? let's just give him a traumatic brain injury' and then didn't develop his character in any real way

SPEAKING OF RIC GRAYSON, gothamites making confused memes out of ric grayson is much needed

'dick grayson is my taxi driver? can anyone explain what the fuck happened he looks like an italian plumber?'

i hate to say it but batfam are def "marvel characters" in that sense they are characters who are human but become superheroes unlike most dc characters who are gods trying to be human maybe this is why I like batfam

fair enough

[genesisrose74]

Christmas with the Karasuno Boys (HC’s)!!

Part 1: Daichi, Suga, Asahi, Nishinoya, Tanaka, & Ennoshita

Part 2 (Kageyama, Hinata, Tsukishima, Yamaguchi, Kinoshita, & Narita) here!!

A/n: Tumblr said my word count was too much so I’m splitting this bad boi up into two parts :p Enjoy!!

*****

Daichi

A huge romantic during Christmas, 10/10 quality cliche times spent together

You wanna go ice skating? Hell yeah sweetheart, he will make it the most beautifully romantic thing you’ve ever seen

Like straight out of a holiday postcard type beat

Istg the rink he takes you to looks like a more heartwarming version of Rockefeller Center

He’s a big keeper of tradition when it comes to making plans, but doesn’t mind a bit of nonsense fun when everything falls into place

Which is why you love to bring the team along on adventures because they make everything all the more entertaining

At first he’s confused like ??? You don’t have to do that just if they’ve been pestering you about it

But then he realizes you care as much about them as he does (hint: a hell of a lot) and they’re thus invited along for some stuff

Of course y’all also get some quality time together on dates with just you both

Anyways you and Daichi have talked a lot about traveling and how he was really interested in seeing new places

So as his gift you got him a carved map with a roll of red string and thumbtacks, so that he could plan out all the places he wanted to visit

You know how when Kiyoko found the “Fly” banner for Karasuno and all the boys cried?

Yeah

Like that but with lots more hugging and laughing

“You know you’re gonna have to help with mapping this out, right?”

“Is that an invitation I hear?”

“Oh, that’s a promise”

FJSFJDSK ALEXA PLAY AMERICAN BOY BY ESTELLE—

Please I love him; he is so damn sly and sassy I will die with this headcanon

Sugawara

I swear on everything that Christmas with him is equivalent to a Hallmark movie

It smells like joy and warmth wherever he is, and this season only amplifies it

He is such a cheeseball without even having to try

But it’s in the really endearing and heart-melting way,,, just MMM PERFECT

He’ll take you on a walk through those neighborhoods with those crazy light decorations in the front yard and buy you hot chocolate

If he sees a group of little kids gaping at all the lights, he’ll leave them starry-eyed with stories of magic, reindeer, Santa and so-forth

“You know, I’ve heard that Rudolph’s nose is supposed to be brighter than the world’s most powerful Christmas light”

Good heavens, children absolutely adore this man

Anyways he’ll make it a little game as y’all walk around this beautifully lit neighborhood, both of you with a different assortment of bingo squares printed on paper

First one to bingo chooses a movie to watch after getting back to Suga’s house

Will wrap a big fluffy blanket around you both and pull you into his chest while watching the movie

For his gift, you got a star named after him

It’s because y’all alway go stargazing for dates every month, just to sit out, talk and cuddle

Suga gave you the SOFTEST look after opening your gift and this cute little card you made 🥺

“Lets go try to find my new favorite star”

PLEASE HE IS SO SWEET

“Right now? Koushi it’s 11:30 pm”

“Just for ten minutes, and then I’ll get you home”

So y’all spend the rest of Christmas Eve on his roof, sipping warm tea and attempting to locate Star Suga

Asahi

Cuddle bear alert ‼️‼️

It’s basically hibernation time for him, because he’s not the biggest fan of cold

That’s alright with you though 😌 more coziness for you

Lots of quality moments indoors means more creative dates

A whole day devoted to chill present wrapping? Hell fuckin’ yeah

Nice music, pretty wrapping paper, shiny bows, maybe a little Christmas rom-com playing in the back — the whole shebang

You find out pretty quickly that despite how it sounds, it’s actually quite a satisfying and enjoyable pastime

Practically had to drag him out of your living room to secretly wrap his own gift

As much as he’s the king of timidity and soft™, he can be very playfully stubborn when he’s comfortable, hence why he was such an ass to get out of the room

I have no doubt that Asahi would melt for the most adorable, cheesy shit

So you not only bought him some really reliable headbands for volleyball use, but you also made a little coupon booklet

He can basically cash in paper promises for certain things, like getting to choose the next date idea, picking a movie to watch without any objection, having you make his favorite food, etc.

There’s one that he can exchange for a full out spa day trip, because good heavens he’s a sucker for those

Massage and exfoliation and everything — it makes him feel ✨refreshed✨

He was ecstatic fam, I don’t even know what to say

Like a puppy who just got a bunch of toys and a new backyard to play

Mans cashes in one almost immediately, and at first you’re confused

Like it’s Christmas time bubs, what are we gonna be able to do when most places are closed and it’s the holidays?

Then you read the paper

“Free hug (can be used and renewed <3)”

GIVE HIM HIS DAMN HUGS RIGHT NOW

He uses that one a lot throughout the upcoming days, to the point where he just keeps the paper on him for fun

“You realize you can just ask me silly, you don’t need to keep carrying the coupon around”

“Yeah, but it’s entertaining”

Cute little cheeky bastard

Nishinoya

LOVES LOVES LOVES CHRISTMAS

You know the 12 Days of Christmas? The song??

He gets you a small present EVERY DAY for all 12 days

Not to mention he has a big present that he saves for the actual holiday

Y’all are the type of couple to get ice cream in the middle of winter

Nishi loves his cold snacks any time of year, and you’ve thus picked up a similar taste

He will consistently pester you about what kind of present you got him

Gets pouty when you don’t tell him, but in the back of his mind he’s glad because it would ruin the surprise

Anything you get him instantly becomes his most prized gift tho

It could be a literal rock with googly eyes and he’d put it in a protective glass case for preservation

But of course you get him something better than that because he only deserves the best

He’s got this specific assortment of products to maintain his spiky hair and to make sure it’s healthy, but they’re pretty expensive to buy when he runs out

When he tore open your present’s decorative wrapping to discover a huge basket of basically every hair product he ever needed, he got wide-eyed

There was also a booklet of little notes you’d kept throughout the month that listed all the little things you noticed and adored about your precious boyfriend

He nearly CRIED reading them

“Baby, you didn’t have to do all that for me”

“You act like you don’t deserve all of it and more, Nishi”

Refuses to leave your side after that

Holding your hand, hugging you as tight as he can, etc.

He is head over heels idc idc

Tanaka

Another man who is obsessed with the holiday season and everything that comes with it

He is the biggest sap for this shit istg

Will spend hours trying to get you the best present of all time

And he succeeds exceptionally

Mistletoe? He’s got an ABUNDANCE on hand at any time, just to make sure he can get fair share of his kissies 🥰

His signature beanie appears in full force during winter

Sometimes you’ll pull it over his eyes before giving him a peck on the cheek and dashing off in the school halls

“I’ll see you after school, babe!”

Speech = jumbled + incomprehensible

“Uh hUh, you do that~”

He’s: adorable

I just know that he melts for really sweet and thought-out gifts

Like anything you give him he’ll adore, don’t get me wrong, but the ones done with special care and love are just his kryptonite

He brought you into a massive bear hug and spun you around when he opened a photo book of old pictures taken together, complete with lots of cute messages and anecdotes written alongside them

You and Saeko may have also gone in on another present for him without his knowledge

And on Christmas Eve, you dragged a curious Tanaka into his front yard to the sight of a shiny motorbike

It was Saeko’s old one that she’d held onto for a while, and an old schoolmate offered to fix it up nice in time for the holiday at a discount, so y’all decided to divvy up the lowered price and got it done for Ryu

Sweet boy was taken aback, with his hands clapped over his mouth and everything

Saeko patted him on the back as he stood there in shock, giving her baby brother a sweet smile

“All yours, little bro!”

Ya, Saeko fucking loves you 😌 and so does Tanaka

Overall very lovely, would cry to be loved by the Tanaka siblings

Ennoshita

After spending past Decembers with his fellow second year classmates (namely, the very enthusiastic Noya and Tanaka), he’s grown to know quite a bit about the different holiday events that go on around town

Still, Ennoshita is a pretty simplistic guy and is content with simply spending time with you

So when you recommended going to pick a Christmas tree out for your place together, he’s totally down

As long as he gets to help decorate too ☺️

Y’all end up picking a beauty of a tree ngl

It’s SO TALL

And a super stronk friend — fit for the most heavy duty of ornaments

It takes some damn work to get that bad boi inside and upright after driving back to your house

But like hell did that stop you

Now that it was all set up, sturdy, and given plenty of water, decorations were brought into the equation that same night

No rest until it’s all set up and looking mighty beautiful

Okay maybe some coffee breaks in between, but other than that the grind don’t stop ���😤

Ennoshita is an expert at making Christmas trees look absolutely immaculate

Idk if it’s because he’s had to deal with cleaning up disorder for a while now?

Looking at you, ya second year loons

He just has the touch, fam

He’ll of course let you have input on which light colors, what type of ornaments, and so on

But honestly it’s really fun seeing him fully concentrated on making your tree the best it can be

He lets you on his shoulders to put on the tree topper 🥺

For his gift, Ennoshita really loves books, so you decided to get him 12 different (hardcover!!) stories — one for each month in a year

Along with a small sticky-note blurb on the covers of each to explain why you chose it, and to give similar title recommendations if he ends up enjoying

He was so surprised with how thoughtful and extensive it was

Loved it so much that he immediately started to read the first one, with you sat in his lap

“Chikara, you realize you’re meant to start this one in January?”

“Shh, I’m getting a head start”

[normal-thoughts-official]

magnus bane can cook anon here. also: cooking is a love language for raphael bc food is so rooted in community/family. they absolutely teach each other traditional recipes. big family meals hosted by father and son pls 🥺 or magnus making a comfort meal for himself when he's feeling nostalgic and inviting cat over for dinner bc she's been so busy and he wants to catch up while also making sure she's nourished--two birds, one stone (he absolutely makes her take home leftovers). let magnus cook...

ugh i know this ask is old but i'm not sure what you mean by "magnus bane can cook anon", like, if you sent me another ask about this, i didn't get it rip. unless it's something i have already answered and i don't remember, in that case i'm sorry

anyway, YOU ARE RIGHT! magnus being unable to cook is preposterous tbh, i will not listen to these lies. HE! IS! INDONESIAN! food is important! and as an immigrant in particular he knows that better than anyone because food is a way to keep connected to his roots, to his love, to his culture. i will not accept any "magnus can't cook" slander, he CAN! plus like you see the way he made alec's stew amazing?? yeah yeah he used magic but i doubt there is a "make this delicious" spell, he needed to have known WHAT he would have done to the stew, add this and this and that to alter the taste, so like? he knows how to handle himself in the kitchen okay and he knows what tastes good and what doesn't, he can cook

and he knows exactly how important food is as a love language and YES him and raphael!!!! i don't have to argue that raphael can cook of course, we all know he does, and again! immigrant! LATINO!!!!! food is so fucking important for latines in general, even non-immigrants, and i imagine that it is even more so for immigrants. it's part of your culture, part of who you are. and like! raphael has been unable to eat for so long! i bet he misses it so much and i think when he wants to thank magnus for something, food is the way to go

especially in the early years. he didn't have much he could have done for magnus when he was just a recently Turned vampire kid with nowhere to go and nothing to his name, but he COULD cook for him. and i bet he was ecstactic to. i hc that magnus grows his own ingredients at home because he simply doesn't trust gringo markets to have good food and while he can and will travel to jakarta every now and then to enjoy a good food market - again, it's an intrinsic part of his culture! of course he wants to go to those when he can, it's not just the food, it's the sharing and the experience - he also wants to grow his own food. plus i think he is attached to plants. you've seen the way he talks to snakes, you mean to tell me he doesn't have a bunch of plants he grows (both for potions and foods) and talks with and grooms and is all loving towards? nonsense. absurd. i won't listen to these lies

and YES i am projecting unto him but i don't care! magnus loves his little plant friends (they have been particularly therapeutic for him in the early years after camille i feel, when he was so lonely. of course he has his cats but cats aren't really fans of hanging out all the time and plants are always there and just looking at a plant you helped grow makes you feel so much better) and prunes them with so much love and care, and because of magic he can control the weather conditions so it's always ideal for them, and make sure they are well taken care of. but he likes to do it himself without the need of magic when he can, because it's all about bonding with the plants. and when he gets to literally take the fruits of his labor, well. it makes the food and potions even more special :)

actually i bet that it actually does make a difference for potions, like... when you know the ingredients and they have been grown with love and care and a connection to the warlock they are more powerful. because plants are living, breathing things that build connections, and magic connects all things, and also because i said so!

BACK TO COOKING

i think part of the reason we've never seen him cook tbh is just because it's so... intimate. like it requires opening up about his culture and his past and a part of who he is and how he feels is in a dish (as with every dish) so it's just... way more intimate and intense than just taking someone out to dinner or something. and most of his interactions in the show were with shadowhunters, whom he either doesn't trust for obvious reasons, or does trust (alec and izzy basically, maybe clary) but knows they don't really fully understand what it means to him so there's just too big a chance to feel like he wore his heart on his sleeve for nothing (i'm talking mainly about alec here cuz i don't think he'd cook for izzy or clary lol but i do think they're on his trusted or somewhat trusted list)

and with raphael it's just painful because raphael can't eat and that's a big thing that probably upsets him on the regular, like, it's another thing that makes him feel a- human; and b- connected to his culture. and when i say human i don't mean it as just "humans eat food", i mean it as in eating for humans is about socialization and self-expression and having that taken away from him makes him feel soulless

but that just makes raphael want to cook MORE! i mean we've seen him cooking for rosa('s nursing home) so that's pretty much canon anyway. and i have no doubts in my mind that raphael used to cook for magnus all the time. initially recipes he already knew from his mom and his abuela, because again, it's just... sharing who he is and almost like welcoming magnus as a part of his family, and magnus understands that 100% and probably cries the first time rapha makes him pozole or something (he knows it's rapha's comfort food and he's just had a hard day and he's tired and maybe a bit worn by depression and raphael makes it for him and he's just... so touched and overwhelmed by the immenseness of the gesture). and then magnus starts to tentatively teach him the recipes he remembers for his own mom and again that's just.... ugh the magnitude of that is incalculable. and rapha knows it too

and he's highkey nervous because he knows magnus hasn't really tasted this in so long and he doesn't want to butcher it, you know? and he can't try the food to see if it's good, he can basically only go by smell (which i figure he has perfected over the years but he's known magnus since the early years so that was probably harder by then) but magnus is just happy to have someone to pass this down to, you know? like he's cooked meals for ragnor, dot, cat, elias, etc., before (immortal squad dinner meetups where everyone brings their favorite foods from their childhoods and ragnor makes tea because no one is putting up with that shit <3) but passing the recipes on to someone else is a whole different deal, it speaks of their father-son bond and it's basically welcoming raphael into the family back, you know? and rapha knows

and from then on rapha starts cooking these recipes for magnus, particularly when he's feeling down or just as a thank you for everything he's done for him and aaaaaaaaaaa

and then of course eventually the potion that allows vampires to eat is created and raphael can FINALLY eat again and try all the recipes he's been making for magnus (and sometimes cat) for years!!! after of course the first order of business which is making himself some pozole and everything else he's been cooking for rosa and missing terribly. but AFTER he has his mexican feast they absolutely have one of these meetups again and everyone gives raphael a little something from their culture for him to try and it's just <3 beautiful and i need a moment

AND CAT YES. we all know cat is overworked to death and magnus will NOT put up with it. and food is a love language so you know <3 half the time she will get home and find some little delivery packages from magnus, dot, ragnor, elias, raphael, or all of them (lol) with food because they know sometimes she gets home too tired and skips dinner and she SHOULD NOT. and they all have little notes like "i've sealed it magically so it's still hot, enjoy <3" and it's just sweet okay

and then there are the dinners... not just the super big dinners they all have together where everyone cooks something but sometimes just cat and magnus in magnus' loft and magnus makes her something, including some recipes she's taught him, and he absolutely makes extra and he's not even subtle about it because when is he ever ("*presenting cat a industrial-sized pan filled with food* oh, guess i miscalculated how much we'd eat" "really, magnus?" "yes") and makes her take the leftovers and she's just grinning at him the whole time and gives him a little kiss on the cheek for his troubles. then they sit down and drink wine and gossip and have fun until the tension has left both of their shoulders and they feel recharged. and cat might sleep there or might go back home the same day but either way when they have to part they trade "take care"s and catarina has this huge smile on her face as she takes thousands of conteiners filled with food, and magnus has that soft smile that he gives her, and aa <3

[energyanon]

Hi EA! I've been hearing some members of the fandom say that Henry is racist. This because of him having dated Gina C and now dating NV. I obviously don't know him but I don't think he is...these fans say he should have said something when the blackface photo came out and because he didn't that's proof he *approves* ergo racist Henry. What do you think?

Controversial opinion, I don’t think he’s racist via association. You can have friends and partners that are absolute bullies and not have the backbone to do anything about it. I have friends that are - as far as anyone would know they hate them in private - friends with an absolute abusive asshole, and the thing is they don’t like the things that they do but depending on the situation sometimes have to remain with them to keep the peace OR are also just manipulating them to get something out of it.

Also a lot of people recently *this is more for Gina, have been switching sides as well, it could have been that she was always a bit more on the fence. But you have to remember that since 2016.. shit has changed. The media between absolute hatred and just a different version softcore of hatred through wokeness points is rife. It’s targeted. If you go down the wrong rabbit hole you can end up on pretty racist shit. There was a tiktok recently on just how quickly you can get to the HORRIFIC indoctrination side of tiktok and it only took one day before you’re entire FYP was full of it. Unless you’re actively changing your algorithm it’s hard to then get back out of. This is the issue with socials atm.

My point here being that, she could have not been racist while with HC. She also COULD have. And maybe he was also dumb and ignorant and didn’t have any poc around him that he could relate to and so he wasn’t educated on why certain things are bad. And he should in that case know better at 28 but I also doubt she was out there making holocaust jokes with him because it wasn’t the time of covid or trump in which she’s comparing this to. Ya know? People can hide themselves very well. Especially when you’ve only known them a year.

When it comes to NV. The photo sucks ass, right now it’s also the only evidence we have of racism as far as I know (still pretty big) and it could be said that she gave Henry the excuse she gave the daily mail and he said ok fine you know what it’s g if that’s what they genuinely told you, you’re dumb but that’s what they told you.

It could also be that he doesn’t care cause it was PR anyway. Could also be that he doesn’t care cause he gets something else out of her. Could also be that he is madly in love and he doesn’t care cause he loves her for her mistakes and all.

Tldr; you can love someone and not like what they say and do, you can like someone and have the same. It’s your job if you want to be a good person to call out that shit. It’s those peoples job to change if THEY want to do better. So then maybe she said to HC you’re right, I’ll never do it again and then she didn’t. Maybe she actively changed herself. We don’t know, the point is we know nothing it’s all speculation. He could have called her out, she said I don’t care and he said you know what fine just not in front of me or publicly and they continued on. He would have still called it out, he now just has a red flag in his pocket for later. We don’t know.

Do I think HC is a racist through association? No. Should he stop making a habit of it if he wants to be on the right side of history? Fuck yeah. Should he maybe talk more about black/poc rights other than a small little “hip hurray for a possible black superman” extremely yes. Does he make any comments about black rights on his own? (Aka, not apart of a huge black square movement on Instagram that he would have been destroyed for if he DIDNT do) yeah. If he’s anti racist it should be for every moment of his waking life not just the ones that are public and brought up *rarely*

I’m not sure if he’s racist. He hasn’t done much to prove he 1000% isn’t. He also hasn’t done much besides the general lack of what seems like genuine support to prove that he is. He has however shown that he doesn’t seem to want to have an opinion publicly. And that should be noted for what it is. Though association of GF’s though? There’s much more to that story, there’s alot of moving parts we’ll never know, and I don’t think it proves it.

[trunkzbriefs]

Any Son and/or Briefs family headcanons? Spicy hot takes? Truths Toriyama and Toyotaro themselves can not handle? Straight up lies?

GODDAMN SORRY this took a while cause i suck at putting thoughts together. i apologize for my obvious briefs bias i have more hcs for them than the son family despite loving them both :pensive: anyway heres some random stuff

briefs hcs:

all of the briefs are pros at non-verbal communication. i hc that saiyans have their own language (and also in my own Mind Canon they still have their fuckin tails) and a lot of it is done through tail movement/body posture/grunts/etc. etc so theyve all sort of picked that up. even bulma, who doesnt have a tail, is pretty good at getting across what she means without actually speaking. they still do speak normally but it comes in handy sometimes considering that both trunks and vegeta are prone to running out of speaking energy or getting very frustrated with words, so having another way to communicate works very well for them

vegeta is fffffffffffffffffffurry. without getting too deep into my own General Saiyan hcs (thats why i made a whole ass four subspecies!!) i think that the entirety of planet vegeta tended to be very hot aside from the part where the castle was, where the temperature would drop. meaning that saiyans working in the palace would grow thicker fur around certain parts of their body, and in the royal saiyans theyd be Especially fluffy. he kept it down on earth, but he has thick patches of fur around the bottom parts of his arms and legs. kind of like snowy boots and gloves! he also has fur that grows in on his neck like a lions mane.

future trunks is an actions sponge, vegeta is a words sponge. vegeta will pick up words VERY quickly regardless if he fully understands the meaning of it or not (completely inspired by 'THATS RIGHT BOYS... MONDO COOL' in z) and future trunks will unintentionally mimic the actions of people - around people he looks up to he might take a few small mannerisms from but this extends to copying the disposition of anyone; he's just very adaptive. this is the most obvious (and funniest) when he's around vegeta bc it really shows like. yeah damn that sure is vegeta's son

vegeta & bulla have an intimidating bastard smirk naturally. their natural smiles are pretty frightening and they have to put effort into a 'normal' one. this also extends to current trunks, his default smile is the Vegeta Bastard Smirk but he learned to have a normal smile quicker than his father and sister. future trunks has a slightly unnerving natural smile (the fact that his pupils are always drawn so fucking small makes me hc that he just has a very intimidating look of 'cat thats about to pounce on an unfortunate trapped mouse' whenever he smiles) but he learned to look normal even quicker than current trunks since he's around humans a Lot and is sort of their uh, Hope. don't want to look scary to the people who depend on you!

bulma has some fighting knowledge and mildly good ki control. vegeta taught her it as a just in case so that she'd be able to defend herself against Bigger threats if he wasn't there and also so she could raise her own ki to alert someone to her if she had to.

vegeta is extremely clean and can not stand to have things disorganized for more than like... an hour before he has to tidy everything up. every time he goes down to the lab and bulma is passed out in a pile of bolts and circuit boards it kills him inside just a little bit

future trunks has little concept of power control. since his timeline was always in danger it wasn't really an important thing for him to learn. the amount of mugs he's accidentally crushed is impressive

vegeta tends to not sound like he's asking questions when he is. he doesn't add the proper infliction to the end of his questions and just sounds flat most of the time. it's confusing to people who dont know him well.

im not even gonna lie, im a BIG fan of the chill demon panchy headcanon so i love the idea that the briefs have a Lil bit of demon in them but just dont know it ghjnkm

[banging my fists on the 'hcs that not even got could take away from me' table] future trunks has OCD

vegeta doesn't really get labels but he's bisexual & "debatably a man", bulma is bisexal & bigender transfem (sometimes shes Wamen and other times its like "gender? no"), bulla is a nonbinary lesbian, current trunks is a bisexual trans man & future bulma forgot to explain the concept of gender and sexuality to future trunks so he's a little confused on that front and his gender & sexuality are "i have literally never thought abt these concepts in my life but i think men are nice. i refuse to think about gender though" (i actually have two main hcs for future trunks which are either gay trans man or more-feminine-presenting nonbinary bisexual)

son hcs:

goku is Not as fluffy as vegeta at all, but he does have fur on certain parts of his body. namely on the back of his elbows + ankles, down his back connecting to his tail, and on his shoulders. its inherented from gine!

gohan is learning saiyan language from vegeta! vegeta acts grumpy about it but he's glad to have someone to teach. when gohan learned that most of the history had been lost he basically wished shenron for a big ol book on saiyan culture and gave it to vegeta just as an act of kindness and vegeta was like [in an angry voice but very touched] "Ok. Sit down. You're learning." by extension gohan is also teaching the rest of his family!

i will take ox king being actually non-human to my grave so like, chichi has horns and a very short ox tail! gohan and goten both have horns, but they're hidden by hair. goten's horns are bigger than gohans.

goten also has a more ox-like tail, with a little puff of fur at the end. generally, gohan looks more saiyan-like and goten looks more ox/human-like.

although he keeps up his cheery demeanor very well, goku is still haunted pretty badly by like... everything that’s happened in his life. he still has frequent nightmares about cell & buu specifically.

gohan will freak out at worse, zone out at best, if he's even tapped on the neck. it reminds him of the whole 'getting his neck snapped on namek' so that area is pretty off limits to everyone

goten gets along really well with android 17. they both have a love for nature and 17s kind of like his chill uncle, so whenever he gets too stressed out or just needs a break you can find him face down on the ground outside of 17's place on monster island.

goku is really really good at remembering completely random shit. bulma uses this to her advantage whenever she's working and has him memorize random technology stuff. a week later goku can not remember what he had for breakfast that morning but as soon as bulma asks "hey do you remember what i told you last week" hes like "oh yeah sure i have no idea what it means but [blurts out three hours worth of technical garble]"

oh boy is this a headcanon that has a lot more depth to it than just a bullet on a tumblr post, but gohan has DID!

goku, like vegeta, doesnt get labels either, and does not even Try, ask him about any of it and hes like "i dont get the gender thing but i think lots of people look nice :)" gohan is gay and like vegeta, "debatably a man", goten + chichi are both bi nonbinary, & pan is a lesbian trans woman.

both:

bulla and pan are both into music! i think theyd mess around making their own stuff w/ launchpads

i have a general hc of ki mixing or shielding, essentially, if youre close enough to someone people wont be able to tell apart your ki and you can also 'shield' someone with your ki for a small amount of time. if vegeta has his energy low, his and bulma's energy are the same. same thing with goku and chichi! goten and trunks are near impossible to tell apart, and same thing with gohan and videl.

though goten and trunks are both protective over their younger siblings, gotenks is that protectiveness times a thousand. look at bulla or pan wrong for 2 seconds and you're going to have an angry gotenks in your face asking if you have any last words. i like to think that trunks and goten fused casually a lot, especially around the time where bulla and pan were young, so its basically goten and trunks own attachment to them PLUS gotenks' attachment to them as his own person combined.

i like to pretend end of z did not happen the way it did so uub, using nimbus, travels back and forth a lot. goku isn’t the only one who teaches him how to fight as goten, gohan and trunks all think of him like a little brother and love training with him!

fuck you letters to toriyama/toyotaro hot takes:

cell, as cool of a villian as he is, definitely should have had a creepier final form. or multiple- just something that really drives in the fact that he's made up of other's dna & fuckin ABSORBS people. also his first two forms should have had a different absorbtion method other than the tail thing (not the drinking thing thats fine) it just feels.   Weird. not good

it would have been far more interesting to keep the bitter attitude towards vegeta that future trunks had imo... in super trunks was going through a Lot granted but the fact tht he wasnt more confrontational to vegeta being a dick to him seemed kind of off considering his attitude in z i just.. think it would be interesting and far better if they had more of a back and forth 'family but lowkey hate each other' relationship

i dont want to rant about super so heres some super condensed takes, goku black arc specific because thats 90% of what ive seen of super:

mai is a fucking freak ass weirdo, why did they not just make another character to pair with trunks

trunks not flipping the fuck out at his timeline being erased feels... out of character. also trunks deserved the win against zamasu

future bulma did NOT need to die

trunks should have just stayed in the current timeline

please fucking let trunks and goten grow up. we SAW a version of trunks who looked 14 (history of trunks....) and the versions of goten & trunks we have r/n in super do not look 13/14 respectively what in the goddamn hell is going on in the character design department

super definitely should have taken place later down the line

supers version of bulma and videl look awful. why are they That stick like.

vegeta needs to kill frieza. just once.

fu has enough potential to be a very interesting mainline character and i am so sad he's not

i would actively enjoy a sdbh anime with more  budget that isnt just a promo anime and has a plot that makes sense... i think db should have more wild spinoffs

xenoverse deserved a better story that went FULL in on the 'what if' type of timelines- like they did in raging blast which is a FUCKING GREAT GAME

straight up lies:

dragon ball z is a good series

[eccentricpony]

Hi, your kaomojis were so cute! UwU Could I request a movie theater date hc with Tenma? ty!!

Hey anon, thanks for visiting my page! I’d be happy to write this for you! I’m going to write in the style of bulleted imagine if that’s okay. My writing style is usually a usually a little campy humorous, a little emotional, a little sexy, and sometimes flowery.

I apologize if my tenses changed, or the style changed, but I just wanted to have fun with it. Maybe possibly a tiny bit implied NSFW but not really. 

·        You were determined to take Tenma to a movie theater as soon as you had found out he had never been to one.

·        Despite his fame, you had learned that this child star beau of yours had missed out on many opportunities that you had taken for granted growing up. Your boyfriend was an odd blend of mature and immature due to his isolation and the pressure to manage a full-time profession at the age of seven. Fame has a price, as they say.

·        He was hesitant at first – visiting a heavy traffic social scene meant donning sunglasses, avoiding eye contact… but you had already figured that part out! You’d be soliciting Monster Movie Night at the old theater-turned-cinema in the town square. You were sure Tenma would appreciate the 19th century theater aesthetic, and it was sure to have less attendees than the cinema at the mall.

·        And what better movie genre to experience in an old, darkened theater than a classic horror!

·        Yeah, no, Tenma was having none of that.

·        He claimed that the movie you chose had received bad reviews.

·        You then forwarded him the 97% fresh rating from RottenApples.com.

·        He argued that the antagonist of the film was an actor he had worked with before and it would be “too weird” to watch someone he knew go on a killing spree.

·        You proceeded to locate said actor on IFDB.com to find that he had passed away two years before Tenma was born.

·        The lake of excuses having run dry, Tenma agreed to pick you up at 1pm that coming Saturday.

·        Tenma was a bit more fidgety than usual in the back of his family limo. You assumed that it was date night jitters, which was so very precious. The old-fashioned theater marquee came into view, and you excitedly shuffled closer to the window. Nightmare on Birch Street! It had been ages since you had seen the film, and you couldn’t recall how the victims had all been killed… was it Chauncey who had been impaled by the school flagpole?  You continued to jabber excitedly, the exhilarated sentiments floating through your head remaining unscathed as Tenma had the common courtesy to feign a cough so you couldn’t glimpse his sour expression.

·        The journey from the ticket kiosk to the theater was uneventful. There were a few stares, and a “Aren’t you that kid? From the show? At that school?” but you made it to your seats in under 10.

·        Wow, they really renovated this place! It was a bit sad to see that the creaky wooden seats of the theater had been replaced with cushy, high-tech armchairs, but it was comforting to know you wouldn’t be suffering a butt-ache following the film.

·        Immediately, Tenma started messing with the seat like he was in a dentist’s chair. Leg rest up, back down, leg rest down, back straight, back flat. 123 degree angle…

·        “Don’t you have chairs like this at home, rich boy?”

·        “Yeah, but I never sit in my living room. There’s never anyone there.”

·        Oh. You held out the bag of popcorn as a peace offering. “Well, you know that you’re welcome at my house any time you like.”

·        “Yeah so I can recite the monologue from Shinobi Love Song to your mom for the 100th time? I’ll pass”

·        “Forget it, sunshine. It was hasty of me to assume you’d be able to find my house without the guidance of Igawa…”

·        Cheeky banter was the norm with the two of you, and you never tired of it. He handed you the box of Soup Patch kids with a feigned scowl as the lights in the theater began to dim. Leg rest up, back at a 95 degree angle was his final decision.

·        He figured he’d have sometime before the killing started, so he decided to try and pay attention to the overall plot and characters, in case you had questions for him later. So wait… the killer doesn’t actually murder them in real life, but in their dreams? What kind of late night, infomercial hour, made-for-TV junk is this…

·        Time to do the classic yawn and stretch. Smooth as a milkshake, he performed what he felt was a very believable yawn (practiced to a fault due to all of his roles as a too-cool-for-school hottie) and casually rested the stretch of his arm across your shoulder.

·        You had been dating for about 7 months now. You had been moderately intimate. For Tenma to put on this song-and-dance just to hold onto you was a surefire tell that he was nervous. You hadn’t even really considered that maybe he didn’t like horror. You just assumed that because he was an acting professional that he was also a film aficionado, and a fan of all genres, at that. Stop pigeonholing him! you reminded yourself. Sure, he was perfect to you, but you had to let go of those preconceived notions.

·        You turned and leaned closer to him, close enough to kiss. His throat constricted, he had heard there was more to these cinemas than just watching the movie. He prayed to God that this was your intention all along.

·        “We can leave if you’re not into it” you insisted into his cheek.

·        Pulse still quickening through his neck, he sat back and shook is head.

·        “Nah babe, it’s cool. I liked the…” He proceeded to regurgitate every possible fact he had learned about the film within the last 15 minutes.

·        Damn, so he was paying attention. You knew there was no point coaxing him to leave once he had made his mind up to stay, so instead you leaned forward and gave him a peck on the nose.

·        “You’re adorable.”

·        “Tch…” He bristled returning his back to the seat, but with the pouty pleased grin of a child who received praise for a shitty drawing. He watched as your eyes returned to the screen, and you flicked a few pieces of popcorn into your pretty mouth. Now what to do?

·        Anything but look at the screen, really. Beads of sweat began to collect on his brow as the movie soundtrack reached a crescendo. He swiftly brushed them off into his already unruly ginger mane. He needed to distract himself, at least until the slicing and dicing had desisted.

·        What’s this hole for? Tenma located an out of place hole attached to the arm of the chair. It doesn’t seem to have a bottom, but it does taper off deeper down. Curiosity got the best of him, and he casually slid his hand down into the soft drink cupholder. That’s freakin’ weird, there’s nothing even down there. Dumb. And he promptly finds his hand very much stuck.

·        Shit, now what? Now he was really sweating. Some freakin’ great newspaper article this would make. “Teen drama heartthrob finds himself arrested not by the eyes of a young beauty, but the grasp of a plastic cupholder.”  His father would kill him, to be sure. He’d probably have to sign autographs for all of the firefighters who removed the plastic cupholder from around his sore wrist. Here he is, trying so very hard to be a man’s man, to weather the barbarism that is horror cinema just to impress you, and now he’d gotten his hand stuck in the metaphorical cookie jar like a damn kid.

·        He twists and pulls but he can’t get the heel of his palm back through the opening. He jerks his hand in frustration and elbows your flimsy paper cup of Canada Dry. Oh, so that’s what they’re for…

·        “Hey! You got ginger ale on me, what are you doing?” You cocked an eyebrow at his hunched form.

·        “Sorry, sorry! Yeah, I- I think I’ve got it. Don’t worry about me- hey! I think that guy in on a TV show with my father.”

·        Snapping your head back to the screen, you consented that the man did indeed work with Tenma’s father (you’ve told him this before, he’s one of your favorite actors, and now you need to remind him again why his acting is so transcendent that even in a horror movie he can make the most mundane gestures seem so…)

·        To Tenma’s great relief, it turns out ginger ale makes a passable lubricant. Using the splash that now trickled down his forearm, he twisted his wrist and managed to retrieve his very sore hand, tingling with pins and needles as he returned it to his lap. He sensed that you’ve finished your rant and offers a vacant smile. “Yeah… he’s a talented guy…” Crisis averted.

·        Back to all the crazy shit happening on Birch Street. Tenma blanched as the whir of a chainsaw could be heard offscreen.

·        “You okay? he asked, leaning over to comfort you which really wasn’t necessary whatsoever since you actually seemed extremely excited and not the least bit worried or bothered by all of the disgusting blood and guts and weird fleshy ceiling splayed onto the wall by the projector overhead.

·        Before you had a chance to reply, he nuzzled in close to you, his hair brushing your cheek as he snuggled next to your chin. D’aww. You wiggled closer, touching the side of your forehead to his as the shrieks of the Final Girl could be felt penetrating the very seat below you. Great acoustics.

·        Tenma wiggles his head into the crook of your neck to avoid looking at the carnage, murmuring an almost devious “Don’t be scared” into your ear before pressing a kiss to the column of your throat.

·        Your heart leaps into your ears at the sudden burst of semi-public affection; Tenma wasn’t big on PDA, and you were cool with that. He smelled like a mix of clean cotton and Cool Water (they still make that?) He didn’t really do much besides camp out there above your collarbone after that, but his ghosting breath gave you pleasant chills, so you didn’t tell him he was missing the best part.

·        You smelled like almonds and Freesia, he considered. His mother loved Freesia and she had planted them all along their estate courtyard, though she was rarely at home long enough to enjoy it. Tenma enjoyed sitting in the courtyard as a child. While the house was always eerily silent aside from the sterile hum of electricity, the courtyard was always full of tweets and twittering after school, and a discordant chorus of various chirping in the evening. That was what homes are supposed to be like, he had always thought. Chaotic and noisy, but full of life. It was his safe haven, and you carried the scent of it on your skin. You were his new sanctuary… a little pocket of protection from the pains of fake friends and real insecurities.

·        These are his last thoughts before he fell asleep. You realize he’s out like a light as the credits roll, and you feel a sliver of drool trail down your clavicle. Hot.

·        “Tenma? Hey!” He startles awake and you attempt to suppress a grin. “Hope it was a good dream.”

·        Tenma may not have book smarts, but he’s far from stupid. He knows that you know he hated it, and he knows that you know that he knows he was just playing the brave guy to shield his ego. He was beginning to confuse himself, so instead he focused on the core of the matter – he loved you enough to feign interest in something you liked, and you loved him enough to go along with it.

·        “They’re always great when they feature my favorite co-star.” He leaned forward and gave the bridge of your nose a chaste smooch.

·        Gahhh. The right side of your mouth pinches up in a grin. Damn you and your flawless smileyou’re your immaculate stage presence.

·        After he returned his hat and sunglasses to their proper place, with twin grins syrupy-sweet enough to make Yuki vomit, you exited the theater.

·        Once outside, he took your hand and pulled you off to the side of the theater, at the mouth of the little alleyway that led to a street behind the theater. His wide palm and long fingers felt warm and comforting, though rather sticky and smelling oddly of ginger.  

·        “Thanks for coming out with me. I know it’s a pain in the ass for you,” you offered before he could speak.

·        “Nah,” he deflects. “I’m used to it.”

·        You knew he still hated it.

·        “Plus, you’re worth it,” he added, feet shuffling and pink tinging the tips of his ears.

·        Butterflies, oh so many butterflies. Rolling onto your toes, you leaned up and kissed him. After a meager gasp of surprise, he returned it with fervor, nose brushing against yours as he experimented with a few different head angles. Sour Patch kids never tasted so good.

·        The thump of a closing car door was unfortunately audible above the sounds of your smacking mouths – Igawa was on the move and ready to shuffle the prince of teen dramas and his beloved to the safety of the Sumeragi Cadillac CT5. You groaned in unison, and not the good kind.

·        Dragging your mouths apart, your mutual stares shared a silent vow that you would find a way to pick this up again later. Without a word, you both emerged from the shadows, fingers tangled tighter together as you steeled yourselves for a lecture from Igawa on the dangers of lingering in crowded places.

·        You had no doubt there would still be plenty more adjustments to be made by both parties, and many a wall to gently tumble down. But that was a future nearly too resplendent to imagine, when where you were now was already a pretty fantastic place to be.

[risottostitties]

Hi! First time here to ask haha! Any HCs for La squadra with an Otaku s/o? Like she watches anime and even buys merch in secret cuz she's scared they might find her hobby lame and immature? (Also,what will be their fave anime? And genre?)

Oh boy let me tell you I have some THOUGHTS about these boys and their taste in anime

La Squadra with an Otaku s/o

Risotto 

at first he’s gonna be kinda confused, not gonna lie. Growing up the only ‘anime’ he knew was like, Pokemon and Dragon Ball Z but at that point he was too old to really get into Pokemon, and he never considered DBZ anime because it aired next to cartoons and stuff.

But that doesn’t mean he won’t appreciate s/o and their good taste. He’s the kind of guy who wants to learn about what interests the people he loves, and he loves you. So he’d honestly enjoy late nights spent binge watching your favorites.

Comes to realize that DBZ was low key his gym goals for the early years of him working out. If you bought him a ‘Swole like Goku’ tank he’d probably wear it to lift in, ngl.

Knowing your favorites he’d probably look to merch for his go to birthday or Christmas gifts. Considering the hobbies and interests of some of his co-workers, a scantily clad waifu figure is honestly a welcome change of pace.

Depending on the style or aesthetic of the anime (ie, is it goth) he would be down to couples cosplay, although he wouldn’t be comfortable with you posting pictures of his face or any identifiable features of him online

His fave is probably the original Dragon Ball Run, followed very closely by DBZ for the nostalgia bit. Something deep like Full Metal Alchemist (Brotherhood and the original) would also appeal to him

Is also a big fan of Beserk, disappointed by the anime. And Vinland Saga, not disappointed by the anime.

Partial to Princess Mononoke as well. He likes some Ghibli films, isn’t afraid to admit it. Thinks the score for Spirited Away is bomb af.

Prosciutto

Prosciutto doesn’t really get it at first either. Honestly? He probably didn’t know the difference between cartoon and anime until you explained it to him.

Unlike Risotto he might be a bit more judgey if you try to get him to watch some with you. So you gotta hit him with the real classics. 

But similarly to Risotto, he at least makes an effort to try and indulge in the things you like. He might not be as patient, but he tries.

Probably wouldn’t do cosplay himself, but would hunt down exclusive seasonal merch to gift you. He’d take careful stock of your collections and do some research to pick out only the finest figurines and posters for you.

Would buy that hella expensive premium bandai apparel for you too, might even pick something subtle up for himself if he really liked the show it came from.

Also back on the cosplay note, if you agreed he’d find the highest quality cosplay possible and have you model some of his favorites for him.

(In particular if you were comfortable in fem clothing, Faye Valentine gets him going)

He loves Cowboy Beebop. 100%, wants to watch it again as soon as it ends. Everything from the characters to the story to the music and the fliud animation that has aged like fine wine appeals to him. Prosciutto is a man who likes the finer things in life. He oozes class. Cowboy Beebop oozes class and prestige.

Also likes Maasaki Yuasa. It was his idea to go see The Night Is Short, Walk on Girl in theaters.

In general his tastes tend to lean towards arthouse type anime or bona fide classics.

Pesci

Pesci knows anime and has been doing his absolute best to keep it a secret from the rest of the gang because they already tease him enough.

He’s one of those secret weebs, you gotta know where to look. Your best bet is to look at his accessories. Is there a watch with a certain symbol from an anime you recognize? A lanyard with a familiar print? Something subtle that isn’t immediately noticed by people not looking for it.

He has a secret box in his room full of blue rays from his faves. He watches them sometimes when he’s home alone. There’s nothing X rated in there obviously, he just doesn’t want people to know.

Thank god he has you.

The two of you probably bonded pretty fast over your mutual love of anime. Hell, you being such an open and proud Otaku probably gave him a bit of confidence in expressing his interests too.

Yall are the weeb couple. Yall definitely go to conventions together. Couples Cosplays, the whole thing.

He’s a sucker for Shonen just as much as he is for the really good heart wrenching painful ones. 

He watches Boruto because he loves Naruto so much.

He would also tear up at Clannad.

Dango Daikazoku triggers almost a pavlovian response of heart ache.

So does Secret Base.

Ano Hana is probably his favorite, although even you’d need to pry it out of him. Its one thing that Prosciutto gives him shit for liking anime, its a whole different ball game if he found out Pesci liked girly anime

Fromaggio

He knows what hentai is. That’s about as far as his knowledge went before yall got together.

He thinks its pretty interesting though, so he’d be down to watch some with you.

Turns out he really likes action shonen. He got really, really into One Piece. Like, instantly. He likes the fact there’s so much to watch/read before he’s caught up too.

Another boy that would couples cosplay and be really into it. Especially if it continued into the bedroom.

He’s pretty go with the flow, so he isn’t picky about what y’all watch. Even if it isn’t his cup of tea he’ll sit through a few episodes on a night with you.

Fromaggio can’t tell the difference between a high quality figure and a shitty one. Its a crap shoot what he buys for you. Its more a process of ‘oh, so likes this character’ rather than checking the seams and paint quality and how dynamic the pose is/interchangeable parts. 

Definitely buys way too much in the dealers room because of this.

He tries his best.

His fave is probably One Piece, liked bleach a lot but never read the manga, Yu Yu Hakusho is another one he really enjoyed. The Dark Tournament arc had him at the edge of his seat and hype as shit.

Illuso

Had a passing knowledge of anime before dating you. Knew what it was, saw a few of the mainstream ones, thought they were enjoyable, moved on with his life.

Your dedicated interest in anime would surprise him at first, because he always figured it was kind of a niche thing.

Would snoop around your collection of manga/figures/plushes in the mirror world while you sleep.

Winds up reading a lot of your manga like that (he’s good at reading in reverse because of his stand)

He finds he appreciates the art style of 80s-90s manga a lot more than he does the modern stuff. He really got into Ranma 1/2 and thinks Rumiko Takahashi’s artstyle is excellent.

If you asked him to watch Inuyasha with you he wouldn’t say no.

Probably wouldn’t want to do couples cosplay, but he definitely has an appreciation for you in cosplay.

You could talk him into going to a con if you caught him in the right mood. It’d be a hard sell though.

Has a surprising enjoyment for J-Rock. 

Inuyasha is high on his favorites list, as is Ranma 1/2. Also a fan of Ghibli movies although its pulling teeth to get him to admit it.

Melone

This man has watched so much hentai in his life.

He probably actually knows them by title honestly.

He enjoys anime too, and is not ashamed unlike Pesci. Everyone already knows he has unconventional tastes there is nothing to hide here.

Melone enjoys traditionally feminine anime, especially Sailor Moon. That one has a special place in his heart as he has memories of his sister watching it with him when he was much younger.

Its more of a decompress thing than anything else, so he doesn't tend to favor heavy anime with dense plot and more mature subject matter.

He likes Maid Costumes. On you, on him, it doesn’t matter.

Doesn’t know a whole lot about merch and what makes something higher quality but he learns fast. Between you and him the Dealers Room at cons won’t know what hit them.

Is the type to preorder a figure he knows you’d like. And maybe one for him.

Buy him this and he’s putty in your hands for a month straight (SFW don’t worry) https://www.amazon.com/Bandai-Sailor-Moonlight-Memory-Locket/dp/B00UA9XB48

Sailor Moon is his favorite as I’ve said before, his favorite sailor scout is Rei. Is also a fan of Ano Hana, Violet Evergarden, and Toradora although he needs to be in the right mood to watch them.

Ghiaccio

He went down the Fate rabbit hole and we haven’t seen him since.

The gender bending grates as his soul but he is addicted regardless. There’s just so much dense lore that he can’t seem to stop going.

But also seeing how much care and attention is paid to the historical background of a lot of the servants is intriguing to him. Its the perfect blend of accurate and harem trash that infuriates him but also leaves him needing to know more.

He hasn’t played every game but he has Grand Order on his phone and has sunk an ungodly amount of money into the gacha trying to get his favorite (Its Jeanne Alter, in case anyone was wondering) and has seen all the anime (His favorite is the cooking spin off because its surprisingly calming to watch)

Fate Zero is probably his favorite ‘serious’ Fate adaptation. He enjoys the gravitas of the Holy Grail Wars (and hates how it was tossed out the fucking window in UBW/Stay Night/Heavens Feel) and the ritual aspect to the summoning and foreshadowing of future events as well as hints at a deeper magical lore in the universe hit all the right spots in his lizard brain.

The fact every fate anime has a different version of Saber (or a Saber Clone) pisses him off too.

He really loves Fate. And will scream about it for hours at you.

Getting him to watch or talk about anything else is like pulling teeth but he eventually relents because he loves you.

Its difficult to get through a single episode without him grumbling about something or another, but he tries once he sees its important to you. He does his best not to outright insult your favorite anime.

Can appreciate high quality merch as well, probably collects Jalter Figures himself.

If you’re comfortable in fem clothing, Cosplay Jalter for him and he will literally ascend then and there. Keeps pics on his phone. Would probably make it his background. He’s weak

Outside of Fate he finds he enjoys high fantasy shows. Historical fantasy pisses him off too much, and straight up historical drama would also have him grasping for inaccuracies.

Full Metal Alchemist is a non-fate series that he really loves because of the world building. The movie Maquia was one he enjoyed as well. Likes every Miyazaki film, don’t tell anyone. Cried (and raged) when Ushio died in Clannad.

In general he just likes really good world building. It has to be good otherwise he’s going to spend the whole time picking it apart.

[ccwastaken]

Howdy hi this story is set before Scarlett and the shakers got uh. Popular. There's some swearing in here. Oh and. Janana is referred to as Janet because Janana is a nickname in my hcs that she hasn't been given yet.

×××××××××

Janet set down her pen and sighed. She glanced at her watch. Three twenty seven pm. Hm. She had an appointment in three minutes, didn't she? She reached for her journal and flicked it open. Looking over the appointments for the day, she found she was correct. Some amateur band "Rudy and the Shakers". She frowned at the name. She hated appointments like these. They were almost always wannabe rockstars, entitled rich kids or teens that barely knew how to play a guitar. She sighed. No- no she wouldn't be negative about this one. Every band deserved a chance at fame. That was why she worked in A&R.

But she would admit the job got...tiring. She sometimes wished she didn't have to stay in this office all day, doing paperwork- she wished to have a band of her own to manage, to help and popularise- that was what she'd always wanted. But...she was starting to doubt it would happen...

The phone on Janet's desk buzzed. "Miss Patel, there's a group here to see you." The secretary's voice came. She snapped out of her thoughts and sat up.

"Send them in." She replied, her voice back to formal business. She straightened the papers on her desk, pulled her chair closer to her desk and watched the brown wooden door across the room from her. There was a knock. She looked down at her paperwork and held her pen in her hand. "Come in."

Janet looked up at them as they entered. There were four of them. All fairly young, probably fresh out of highschool. The first was a guy with a navy mohawk, sunglasses, and a pierced ears. He wore a ripped navy jacket, grey shirt, and ripped black jeans. The second was a tan woman with long red hair. She wore a similar outfit, white ripped jacket and jeans and a red shirt. Both of them wore matching combat boots, red and navy respectively. The third was another guy. His spiky hair was clearly bleached blonde. He seemed pretty average compared to the other two. He wore a denim jacket, a striped shirt and jeans. He looked like a normal guy who'd work at a burger joint or something. The last was a ginger girl with blonde bangs. She looked both younger than the others and like a typical ska fan. White button-up shirt, black tie and hairband and blue jeans. A pair of drumsticks stuck out of her belt.

Oh great, punk rockers, a ska fan and a possible stoner. She sat up. "So you guys are..."

"Rudy and the shakers!" The sunglasses guy interrupted. Just by his voice Janet could tell this guy had an ego.

"Uh-huh. I take it you're Rudy?" She asked. He nodded.

"Yep! I'm frontman, secondary singer and bass player." He gestured to the blonde man, who had tucked his hands into his jeans pockets. "That's Marty, he's our guitarist," Marty looked from a sign on the wall to Janet. He pulled a hand out of his pocket and waved a bit in greeting. He opened his mouth to say something, but was interrupted by Rudy. "That's Clover, our drummer." he gestured to the ska girl. She grinned and waved.

"Yo." She chirped

"And this fine lady is Scarlett, our primary singer." He grinned at the girl and grabbed her hand, kissing it. Janet cringed internally. Eugh. These two were big on PDA, weren't they? She folded her arms on the desk.

"Alright, well," she gestured to the couch in the centre of the room. "Did you bring something to show me?" She asked as they sat down.

"Uh- yeah." The blonde man, Marty, fumbled with his jacket pocket and pulled out a CD case. He moved over to the desk and held it out. He sat down again after she took it. Janet stood up and looked at the cover as she walked over to the CD player in the corner of the room. There was paper taped to it. In the most punk rock font she'd ever seen was written "Rudy and the Shakers: album 1"

She put it into the player. "It's only a demo album," Marty said. "it's uh- all kinda experimental and-"

"It's our best work." Rudy interrupted, shooting Marty a look. The blonde fidgeted and looked at Janet.

"Just- we've never recorded music before so-"

Not saying anything, she hit play and moved back to her chair. She picked up her pen and grabbed a fresh sheet of paper.

The CD contained ten songs. She sat through every single one, taking notes, listening to the occasional interruption from the band members. As the last few drum beats of the final song faded into silence Janet looked up at the four of them. They all looked anxious, scared of her response.

"Well," she began. "You're definitely not experienced." She looked at Marty.

"But it's good, right?" Rudy asked. His confidence seemed to have died down a bit. Not much but- enough for there to be a slight nervous tone in his voice.

"Weeeell..." Janet tilted her head and looked at her notes. "You're interesting to say the least. I like the style of music, and you certainly have potential..." She frowned for a few seconds. "Your lyrics are unique and attention grabbing. Your song titles too. What I think you all lack is cooperation and experience."

"Cooperation?" Scarlett asked. She seemed to be the one that spoke the least. Even Clover, who was extremely nervous, spoke more often than her. Scarlett did seem anxious yes, but also...prepared. like she was taking this as serious as a job interview.

"Yes. You guys combine punk and ska and it's a great combination but you need to balance it, you need to refine that style." Janet explained. Scarlett nodded in understanding, seemingly thinking over everything. "And some songs are clearly Rudy songs or Scarlett songs- Marty and Clover don't really get that treatment. There's one or two that are distinctly one of them and a couple others where they're sort of crushed together."

"They're siblings." Rudy replied defensively.

"I just think you don't like sharing the spotlight, Rudy." She narrowed her eyes at him. Rudy seemed to stiffen in surprise for a moment. "You guys need a balance. Your songs should sound like all four of you working together. Occasionally you should make one for a certain member."

"Yeah! Yeah I was thinking that because- well we all like different types of music so-" Marty smiled at her a bit. Rudy shot him a look and folded his arms. Janet quietly wished rockers were less entitled.

"So?" Scarlett asked. Janet looked from the anxious band members to her own notes. She opened her mouth, then closed it.

These guys showed promise. More than the other amateur bands she'd met. She looked up at them. These kids...they looked so full of hope as they stared at her in anxious anticipation. She looked down at her notes then quickly back.

"...I'll cut you all a deal." She said. All of them snapped to attention. "I can give you all a year to improve and create an album-"

"What?!" Rudy interrupted. Now it was Marty's turn to shoot Rudy a look.

"Underneath mine and other professional's mentorship," she continued "You'll be given professional grade equipment and lessons. You'll have a team and a professional recording booth to use at your disposal. I'll be there too, obviously." Janet looked at them, arms folded again. "So?"

"We don't-"

Scarlett slapped a hand over Rudy's mouth. "We'll do it." She said quickly. "Thank you so much I-I promise this won't be something you'll regret."

Janet nodded and looked at the other two. Clover and Marty both grinned at her. Clover looked almost ready to cry. Janet scooted her chair back and looked through her drawers. This one year record deal was a standard offer for new bands. It established a business relationship, let the band produce work, and then, if they succeeded, gain a record deal. She pulled out four contracts and stood up.

Walking over, she handed a contract to each band member. "Now, I want all of you to read this over before handing it back in. You can mail it in within the next two weeks, just address it to me." She looked at the four of them as they read. "If the album you guys produce isn't satisfactory, you will have to pay back the costs of your use of equipment. Recording sessions are limited, use of our instruments is not."

"F-Forty thousand dollars...?" Marty asked. He suddenly looked pale. Janet winced.

"It is a lot, but we give you six months to pay it. Start saving throughout the year."

"Uh- excuse me," Clover asked. "It says here you need to be eighteen to sign this. I'm seventeen."

"You'll need parent's permission then." She replied. "Is that all your questions?"

"Yeah why are you such a-" Scarlett slapped her hand over Rudy's mouth again.

"Yes, we're done." Scarlett said. "Thank you miss- we'll make this worth your time, I promise."

"I hope so." Janet moved to her seat and sat down again. "I'll see you guys soon, I hope." She said with a small smile. The shakers grinned at her, except for Rudy who scowled, and left. Janet looked from her paperwork to the door. She- she just signed a band on. She'd be managing them soon if everything worked out. She leaned back in the chair and looked at the ceiling.

"What the fuck, Scarlett?" Rudy snapped as they stepped outside. His girlfriend looked at him.

"What? We got a contract, Rudy, didn't you want that?"

"Yeah but not one with a bitch of a manager and a bigass price tag! How're we gonna pay this shit back?! We'll have to sell our instruments or some shit-!" He gestured at Marty. "We'll have to sell his fucking kidneys or something!"

"This could be our big break!" The blonde retorted.

"I'm not listening to that bitch, Scarlett. This is a shitty deal and you know it!" Rudy hissed.

"Well you're gonna have to, aight? We got no other choices." She snapped. She looked over at Marty and Clover. "You two got any complaints?" She asked, a bit more earnest than she'd been with Rudy.

"Well- I'm worried about the money thing- I could get a job! Maybe a fast food place or somethin' but-" Marty wrung his hands together nervously as he spoke. "Clover?" He asked, looking at his little sister.

"Wh-what if our parents don't let me do this? Would you guys kick me outta the band?" She asked nervously. She looked scared, and Scarlett felt a pang of sadness. She walked over to the two siblings.

"Hey, we wouldn't do that," she gripped each of them by a shoulder. "The shakers aren't the shakers without drums and ska." She smiled at the two of them. "We'll work it out, okay?"

"Okay," Clover smiled a tiny bit. "Thanks Scarlett- you always know what to say..."

The redhead smiled. "Psh- nah, I've just been around Rudy too long," she looked over her shoulder at Rudy. "Ain't that right babe?" She asked with a grin. Rudy huffed and trudged away from them.

"Where are you going?" Marty called.

"The van! I'm getting food and I'm not waiting on you dicks!" Rudy called back. The three other shakers laughed and followed after him.

[tiniest-hands-in-all-the-land]

Could we uuuh get sum pining Aizawa hc ??

Ooh! Yes!!

Aizawa is either someone who tells his crush immediately about his feelings ‘cause uh. it’s Ir A T ioN A L to keep such feelings from somebody, especially when they have a right to know?? OR! Aizawa is someone who will keep his feelings locked up and buried deep for like fifteen years straight and will never say Anything about them until the day he dies. He expects his crush to just figure it out (cause he thinks he’s being super obvious, when in reality, it’s just him doing small things like: he lets Hizashi have One (1) strawberry off of his cake, whereas if anybody else even looks in the general vicinity of said strawberries, Aizawa will roundhouse kick them into the next week)

Aizawa is very much a person who, when told “i love you” by anyone, will answer with a deadpan, “Why?”

Aizawa likes Hizashi a lot, but he is convinced Hizashi would never like him back because. Why would he?? When Hizashi could pick literally anyone and they’d be better than him???

Aizawa knows he’s ugly. He knows he’s sloppy and gross. He knows he does a shit job at taking care of himself. He knows he’s not easy to get along with. He knows he’s stubborn and rude and unfriendly and unsociable and just generally a very unpleasant person to be around. Who would wanna fall in love with that??? Hizashi, that’s who

He’s honestly surprised Hizashi even likes being his friend, when they differ so much it’s sad

Because of his physical and personality traits, Aizawa has. Kinda resigned himself to being alone for the rest of his life. And he’s okay with it. Even if he’ll spend the rest of his life pining over some loud oblivious dope who will never love him back, he’s fine with it. Because he’s just happy to have Hizashi in his life at all to be honest

OKAY THOSE GOT SAD

LETS MOVE ON TO SOME HAPPIER HEADCANONS WHY DON’T WE

Aizawa definitely has some BIG Dumbass Energy, and actually thinks he’s coming down with some sort of sickness when he starts developing The Feelings™

He definitely went to Recovery Girl’s office or googled his ‘symptoms’ to find out what was ‘wrong with him’

“My heartbeat gets really fast and my face feels really hot and i can’t speak right and I feel really jittery and antsy whenever I’m around my best friend am I DYING???”

When Aizawa figures out he got a big ol’ gay crush on his best friend, he. Doesn’t really know what to do with himself?? He’s probably the kind of piner who tries to avoid his crush as much as possible to avoid saying or doing something stupid around them

He gets better about ignoring and maintaining his feelings as he gets older. When he’s in his twenties, his heart will beat twice as fast whenever Hizashi will do something nice for him and for a moment Aizawa will panic for seemingly no reason but then realize–”oh wait that’s right i’m in love with this doofus. This is what feelings feel like”

Aizawa realizes that Hizashi, too, is not exactly attractive by media beauty standards. Buuuuuuut he doesn’t care. He can stare at that obnoxiously bright golden hair and those swirly verdant eyes and that gapped, buck-toothed smile and that stupid, pathetic excuse for a moustache for hours

Besides that, Hizashi just makes Aizawa feel so loved?? Hizashi encourages Aizawa anytime he’s feeling like he isn’t good enough, he knows when Aizawa is having a crummy day and how to turn that sad scowl into a mildly-irked frown, he remembers Aizawa’s birthday, all of his favorite foods and movies and games–everything. Hizashi makes Aizawa feel so important

Aizawa, as a general rule, hates physical touch. Only like four people in his life are allowed to even breathe anywhere near his personal bubble. But with Hizashi?? Hizashi is touchy with everyone–including Mr. Don’t-Touch-Me-or-I’ll-Break-Your-Kneecaps. And at first, Aizawa loathed it. But once he came down with a bad case of The Feelings™, he finds himself not only not minding the hugs and arms slinging around his shoulders and pats from Hizashi, but actively craving them.

Of course Aizawa will never admit that out loud.

So he just settles for burying his burning face into his scarf and not suplexing Hizashi into the ground every time he wraps his arm around Aizawa’s shoulders

His favorite touches are when Hizashi plays with his hair, when Hizashi lets Aizawa rest against his shoulder whenever he starts crashing, or when Hizashi wraps him up in a big ol’ warm and tight huuuug

Aizawa is a big ol’ softy who loves hugs and cuddles but only from One Man pass it on

He’ll never say anything about his crush. Not to Hizashi, not to his friends, not to anyone. He won’t attempt to flirt or make jokes about them potentially being in a relationship, he won’t even bring up a hypothetical scenario.

Regardless, all of his and Hizashi’s friends are basically convinced that they are a couple already. Hizashi likes to play along and fake-flirt with Aizawa and sometimes even flat-out agree with them. 

All the while, Aizawa says nothing. Just kind of. seethes silently in his spot next to Hizashi with a burning red face, flustered and a bit frustrated about how Hizashi is so willing to joke about being together but would never want to actually be together. right??

He doesn’t laugh or joke around along with them, which is not unlike himself, so no one questions it. Just sits and pouts and tries his damnedest not to read into what Hizashi says

Whenever Hizashi drags Aizawa to public outings like parties or bar-hopping or lunch with friends, Aizawa trails after Hizashi like a lost puppy. Hizashi is kind of Aizawa’s security blanket (not that Aizawa will ever admit to such a thing)

If Aizawa is invited to some sort of social event and he hears Hizashi isn’t going to be there, his interest in the event dwindles down from 20% to negative eleventeen percent

Aizawa is a maaaaaaajor introvert. Almost everybody will wear him down if he’s forced to be around them long enough–including Hizashi. But every day, Aizawa finds himself less and less tired after hangout sessions with Hizashi, regardless of how long they spend together. And once they move in together, Aizawa thought that being around Hizashi almost 24/7 might have wrecked him to the point of exhaustion. But in truth?? Aizawa finds Hizashi’s presence in his home after a long, hard day of heroing quite comforting and relaxing

Aizawa often falls asleep on Hizashi’s shoulder and forces him to carry his sleepy carcass to his bed. But uhhhhh Hizashi doesn’t mind shhhhhh

He’s not a big fan of music, but Aizawa loves it whenever Hizashi has him test-listen to an album, or just any song Hizashi seems to be in love with at the moment. Aizawa is actually pretty impressed at the fact that Hizashi always seems to find at least one song with every batch that Aizawa actually enjoys

He loves the feeling of Hizashi’s headphones around his head. The soft pressure and the lack of noise is like a warm, gentle caress to his ears. He can’t explain why he loves it (nor will he attempt to), but he does

Only Hizashi’s headphones, tho–no other pair is the same

Aizawa definitely listens to Hizashi’s radio show whenever he gets the chance. If he’s home early, he’ll fall asleep to his friend’s voice playing through their old radio as white noise. If he’s on a quiet patrol, he’ll pop an earbud in as he skirts around the rooftops.

I think…….. that’s all i got for now D: In conclusion: Aizawa’s full name is actually Shouta Major Dumbass Aizawa

Hopefully these sufficed!!

[queenofthefaces]

Unpopular opinion: While not the best dad, I don't like how most fans keep zeroing in on Stuart for the family's problems, while Carol is almost always exempt. (On top of the notion of them both beating their kids. {1. Nothing implies that and they've been shown multiple times caring about their kids [and each other]. 2. I highly doubt Kenny would sit there and let that happen, especially with how protective he is of his siblings. 3. Complicated family relationships exist, also it's South Park})

STRONGLY AGREE | agree | neutral | disagree | strongly disagree

GOD YEAH I AGREE WITH THIS SO MUCH

I hate when fic is always “Stu left and took all the problems and now they’re doing better with just Carol”—like?? Why are y’all shucking all the problems onto Stu??

BOTH of them are alcoholics, BOTH of them use drugs, when they fight it’s BOTH of them yelling at each other and often it’s CAROL who ups it to violence. Neither of them are abusive to one another in that there’s no power imbalance between them—their fighting is equal. And in fact, despite how much they fight, they still love each other and can have moments where they’re sweet.

And neither of them, but especially not Stu, have abused their kids. The closest is when Stu accidentally took out his anger at their poverty to Karen and made her cry, and was yelling/fighting with Kevin who was fighting back. The first was an accident because he was frustrated and upset, not even at her, and the second was a mutual fight.

From the wiki: “in some episodes Mrs. McCormick berates him without direct provocation. Although he and his wife have been shown physically abusing each other, it has never been shown or implied that Stuart abuses his children. When he is sober, he is very loving and caring to his wife.”

The wiki further goes on in the “family” section to talk about how much he loves his kids too. (In the movie he had a picture of Kenny on his hELMET ;;o;;)

But. Like y’all. They’re poor. That’s where most of their issues likely stem from. Stu and Carol, despite their flaws are, in my opinion, not bad people at heart. They’re just in an incredibly shitty situation. Being poor is HARD. They’re DIRT poor. And there is a big correlation between poverty and drug/alcohol abuse and poor communities. Those things are often targeted towards poor folk who can be easy customers, are more easily manipulated/desperate, and don’t have access to ways to get professional help for addiction.

Obviously it isn’t GOOD that they’re addicts, it sucks, and it’s not w good environment for their kids to be around so much arguing and fighting. But their addictions don’t make them inherently bad or abusive people—in Stu and Carol’s case, they just need help. Help getting free from their addictions and help getting out of poverty, cause if they stay as poor as they are with no support, they’re just gonna relapse.

It’s not fair to pin the blame entirely on Stu. Like, he’s not shown to be any worse than his wife, and by blaming him, it reinforces the stereotype that it’s always an abusive husband and the wife can do no wrong. Like yeah, in real life it’s more likely to have an abusive husband, but that’s not always the case, and if you look at Stu and Carol and immediately paint STU as the bad guy? Despite BOTH of them being just as problematic? It’s an unfair assumption. Carol could just as well be the abusive one, they could both be abusive—but they’re not. Neither of them are.

I think people just want an easy solution to the McCormick’s poverty, but it’s not as easy as a bad husband keeping everyone down. It’s more complicated than that. And like anon said, the relationship between the McCormick’s is likely VERY COMPLICATED.

They love each other, but they’re aware of their flaws—Kenny knows his parents are addicts but he still loves them and knows how difficult it is to try and stay away from an easy high in their situation. They really don’t have anyone but each other, but that internal support is as strong as tissue paper.

Anyways, we need to be nicer to Stu, and to Kevin (stop putting him in prison!! He’s like 13!!) for Kenny’s sake. Let Kenny have a good dad (+brother), and a family that can be supported and allowed to get better. Part of why they’re so stuck is bc the town doesn’t give a shit about them and thinks them being poor is “just the way things are,” but if anyone cared they could prob chip in for rehab for the parents, take care of the kids, help the family get a new place away from the part of town that would have too many temptations.

Whether I portray the McCormick’s getting better or not depends on what I’m writing, but I like to picture them getting better eventually. Like, Kevin gets a job and wishes he could take Karen with him but he can’t cause he lives in a little apartment with a bunch of other guys. So it’s up to Kenny to work his ass off and get Karen out of there. (I hc that Ken moves in with Stan, bc Stan lives close by and is nice like that, and that the two of them get married so that they’d have tax benefits + be each other’s emergency contact instead of their parents. And they adopt Karen for that same reason, to keep her, legally, from Stu and Carol + bc Stan has a better salary which helps the court decide to allow the adoption. Then down the road maybe Kenny or Kevin gives their parents a kind of ultimatum, or their parents realize they’re missing so much of their kids’ lives, and they pull themselves out of their mess.)

This was p long and disconnected but YEAH. I like the McCormick’s and they deserve better, even from us fans, who tend to tear them apart bc that’s easier than trying to fix them—but I think they deserve to be fixed, you know?? I don’t think ken + his siblings would want to be taken away or have their parents taken away :/

Send me unpopular opinions and I’ll answer if I agree or not

[they-are-there-upon-his-head]

Hi, I just really need to talk about modern AU great Comet hcs Please love me

an unprompted ask?? for me??? this is the content I signed up for

so yeah i’m just gonna make a big ass list of headcanons lemme know what you think,,, i love modern au so much so this is also a long post beware!!!

these are random as hell but are heavy on the Andrierre, which is good and bad because I love this ship but also I haven’t read War and Peace so some of the Andrey headcanons might be dead wrong

and of course feel free to correct and/or add on to this list! I’d love to hear what you guys have to say about this and I’m always up for talking about Great Comet

so let’s begin

 Anatole is a picky picky picky eater, he’ll only eat very specific things like That One All-Natural Organic Overpriced Brand Of Mac ‘N’ Cheese™

9 times out of 10 Helene is going to or drinking Starbucks

Dolokhov will eat ANYTHING but he still ends up going to Taco Bell way too often

he drinks too much Mountain Dew

Pierre keeps his shirt on at the beach/when swimming

he only leaves the house to walk to the local convenience store and buy snacks, and the liquor store to buy booze

Marya loves couponing

Dolokhov prides himself on his cool sneakers

Sonya plays the ukulele

she wears a lot of scarves and flannel and loves autumn

Andrey owns a lot of soft gray sweaters

Mary has a really old ipod nano that has like ten songs on it but she listens to it and dances while she cleans in the morning when her father is asleep

Helene wears athletic wear (track pants, cool sneakers, etc) for the aesthetic but isn’t much of a fan of working out

Andrey goes for a run every morning

Natasha uses the dog filter on Snapchat way too much

Balaga wears a weed hat and weed socks

there’s a 99% chance Anatole has texted “send nudes” in the last 12 hours

Pierre has a lot of t-shirts with random bands on them

Marya loves strong coffee

Natasha and Sonya share a room that’s decorated with fairy lights

Andrey works a bunch of jobs and has really weird hours

lucky for him, Pierre never sleeps

so they often go to the local diner together at 3am and get milkshakes and cheese fries

Pierre fucking loves cheese fries

Sonya had a weeb phase

Dolokhov is still in the tail end of his emo phase tbh

Anatole secretly loves Buzzfeed quizzes

Balaga is an uber driver

Sonya watches a lot of Food Network and HGTV

Natasha loves The Bachelor

Dolokhov watches roast videos

Pierre once watched vine compilations for 13 hours straight

somehow word got around that Dolokhov secretly has an embarrassing tattoo (something along the lines of “I love my mom,” perhaps?) but when confronted about it he turned bright red and vehemently denied its existence

Helene wears those Aesthetic™ shirts with random French words on them from like Forever 21 or something

Dolokhov wears Timberlands and track pants and snapback hats

he also wears his socks pulled up high like your friendly neighborhood fuckboy

Natasha has worn the same pair of Uggs for a long time

Balaga unironically wears Crocs (often paired with his weed socks and oversized denim cutoffs)

Dolokhov takes snowball fights very seriously

Andrey can drive but he hates doing it

he bikes to work and around the city

Mary also hates driving, but that’s because she’s deathly afraid of it

Pierre bought contacts but never uses them, he just wears his glasses instead

Dolokhov is really into sports, both watching them and playing them

his favorites are soccer and basketball

he forces Anatole and Helene to watch some games with him and they hate it

they just rate the players’ attractiveness instead and end up talking and wolf-whistling over all the commentary

Dolokhov is annoyed by it at first, but always ends up joining in and marveling at the muscles on these guys! look at those fucking biceps

Natasha visits Pierre once in awhile and brings some gifts and food (usually baked goods that her and Sonya make)

they just sorta hang out and talk and eat, sometimes Pierre makes tea for them and they have a little tea party

Pierre’s very awkward but Natasha is good at diffusing the awkwardness, mostly by talking a lot about nothing

one time she convinced him to let her paint his nails and honestly??? Pierre kinda liked it

he wanted to tell Andrey about it but Andrey still doesn’t seem ready to talk about Natasha

Pierre’s ok with it though, he’ll give it time. Andrey will come around eventually.

Mary swears by medicinal teas and herbs for almost every ailment

she also collects flowers and dries them and hangs them in her room

Dolokhov does parkour

Balaga runs a meme account

Marya has everything you could ever need in her purse, including napkins, Advil, hand sanitizer, wet wipes, tampons, pepper spray, tweezers, Beyonce’s entire discography, the whole city of Moscow, etc

Pierre has a lot of books on the French Revolution

one Valentine’s Day, Andrey got Pierre a locket with Napoleon’s face in it and Pierre was so confused until he opened it and he just looked so pained while Andrey laughed

honestly Pierre thinks it was actually really fucking clever and it’s kinda sweet that Andrey noticed how into the French Revolution he was

also, he had never seen Andrey laugh as hard as he did in that moment and that made it all worth it

Pierre’s favorite TV show is Gravity Falls, though Ancient Aliens is a close second

he also watches reruns of Jeopardy a lot and is surprisingly good at it

sometimes Andrey will watch it with him; Pierre gets all the history stuff and Andrey gets more of the pop culture questions

Helene listens to Lana Del Rey, Dolokhov has a soft spot for twenty one pilots, and Anatole is always a slut for some Britney

Pierre listens to Radiohead and other depressing existential indie/alternative rock

Natasha is a sucker for a good love song, Broadway musicals, or any happy boppy pop song tbh

Sonya loves folk music and anything with string instruments

Andrey is partial to some good 90s grunge rock (Nirvana, Foo Fighters, Weezer, etc)

Marya listens to pop music of the 70s and 80s music, stuff of the “good old days”

boy oh boy can she GET DOWN to Dancing Queen

Mary thoroughly enjoys Christian rock

Andrey secretly loves to dance, he’s one of those people that just kind of loses himself in the music and is just completely in the zone while dancing

honestly??? Pierre’s jealous because 1. how do you relax while there are people around you and 2. how the hell does Andrey still look cool

Pierre is either too self-conscious to dance or he just kind of nods his head to the beat, that’s all he’ll do

(unless he’s alone in which case it’s WILD)

Dolokhov’s dancing is basically just jumping with some fancy footwork once in awhile

Anatole and Helene twerk. c’mon of course they do

one time Natasha tried to teach herself how to twerk and Marya walked in and grounded her for a week

Pierre thinks The Shawshank Redemption is the pinnacle of cinema and will fight anyone who thinks otherwise

Natasha sings in the shower

Anatole loves chick flicks and has a crush on Ryan Gosling

he forces Dolokhov to watch shitty romcoms with him as revenge for Dolokhov forcing him to watch sports

but I mean they’re all curled up on the couch with their arms around each other and Anatole’s crying and Dolokhov’s laughing at him and they’re eating ice cream and takeout from the one place that Anatole actually likes and it’s just them because Helene’s knows that this is just Too Much™ so she left and she’s basically the voice of reason in their friend group and it’s really quite the experience

Pierre was in a really shitty cover band in college

Balaga is always high

Sonya loves oversized sweaters and leggings

Dolokhov has his ears pierced

Helene has a nose ring

not a day goes by when Anatole doesn’t quote Mean Girls

Mary owns a lot of those wooden blocks with random little quotes on them (you know the ones – they’re in any given Marshalls and dearly beloved by suburban wine moms), like “Be happy” and “Jesus loves you” and “You can’t buy happiness, but you can buy chocolate”

one of Andrey’s many jobs is waiting tables at Applebee’s. Pierre has visited him there a couple times and boy did Andrey look dead inside

the only reason Andrey works so many jobs is so he can afford his own place because his father is a piece of shit

Pierre offered to help with the financial aspect of it but Andrey wouldn’t let him pay for it

still, Andrey ends up sleeping over Pierre’s a lot, not that Pierre minds

Old Prince Bolkonsky exclusively watches FOX news and he yells at the TV a lot

he eats the same thing for lunch every day: a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, which he makes Mary prepare

fun fact: Mary is allergic to peanuts

Sonya works at an ice cream parlor and brings home desserts for Natasha and Marya

Marya loves chocolate ice cream, Natasha prefers vanilla with rainbow sprinkles

Sonya is a butter pecan kind of girl, if we’re getting into it (and we are)

Anatole likes French vanilla (it has to be French), Helene likes coffee, and Dolokhov is partial to death by chocolate (or something similar)

Bolkonsky has to have peanut butter ice cream, Mary likes strawberry

Andrey prefers sorbet, but if he had to pick, he’d go with pistachio

Pierre’s favorite is cookie dough

Balaga probably found a way to make weed ice cream tbh

Mary loves scrapbooking

Sonya writes fanfic

she loves to read and wishes she lived in a Barnes & Noble

Andrey and Pierre play video games together and they’ve gotten really good at it

neither one of them likes intense fighting games but they do really like Mario Kart

Andrey plays as Yoshi and Pierre plays as Bowser

Pierre tried to teach Natasha how to play but she kept falling off cliffs

her favorite character is Princess Peach

her and Sonya dressed up as Peach and Daisy for Halloween once and it was really cute

Pierre has worn the same black hoodie for two years

Natasha runs an aesthetic blog

she also writes poetry on said blog

one of Andrey’s coworkers keeps accidentally calling him Andrew and it makes Andrey so irritated

the Kuragins can’t swim

Dolokhov tried to teach them but it didn’t work because Helene’s bikini kept falling down and Anatole wouldn’t go under water because it would ruin his hair

if Andrey goes over Pierre’s during the day, he’ll help him clean the house because Pierre has no motivation to do so

about once a month Marya will stop by and remark how disgusting the house is and before Pierre can even defend himself the whole house has been vacuumed, the windows are washed, the laundry’s done, the clothes are folded, the shelves are dusted, the bathroom’s scrubbed, the beds are made, and there’s fresh flowers on the kitchen table

then they hang out and complain about people to each other and it’s a grand old time

Pierre’s really grateful to Marya, but she refuses to take a compliment

let’s be real though, she relishes in watching Pierre keep saying nice things about her because she keeps denying them and he feels obligated to make her agree

Pierre has a shitty Toyota Corolla from the early 90s that has no AC and is being held together by duct tape and he’s afraid to drive it but too attached to sell it

Sonya has a folder on her laptop that’s just pictures of Tegan And Sara. that’s it

Marya doesn’t know how to whisper

Pierre loves the movie theater but will only go if Andrey or Natasha go with him

after the whole Anatole Fiasco™ Natasha and Sonya blocked Helene on Instagram so she kept making fake accounts until they accepted one of the follow requests

Andrey takes Halloween very seriously

Pierre bites his nails

Helene taught Anatole how to do makeup and now he won’t stop contouring

Anatole takes an obnoxious amount of selfies

Sonya’s wardrobe is almost exclusively from Target

Pierre spends an embarrassing amount of time on Wikipedia

Marya had a flip phone up until a couple months ago when Natasha and Sonya convinced her to get an iPhone

Marya hates it because she doesn’t know how to use it and it makes her feel stupid

but Natasha’s teaching her how to use it and it’s kind of growing on her, it’s just so practical and functional and now she has a pretty red case for it that matches her nails and

Marya goes and gets her nails and hair done every couple of weeks, it’s her mandatory “treat yo’ self” ritual

Anatole pretty much only wears pastel colors

Dolokhov pretty much only wears black (or very very very dark gray)

he has a black jean jacket decorated with lots of pins that he wears all the time

there’s a skull pin and one that says “Jesus hates me” and a Blink-182 one and an Obama one and a gay flag one and an eggplant emoji one and one that says “I love my boyfriend” and it’s fucking iconic

his favorite shirt to wear it with is his Batman shirt

Dolokhov likes DC better than Marvel, Pierre’s the other way around (is that what the duel was fought over??? lmao)

Anatole doesn’t care but he thinks RDJ is hot

Andrey likes both and doesn’t understand why everyone’s so angry about it

Helene has an extensive collection of bralettes

Natasha hates pants and only wears skirts or dresses

Sonya doesn’t think she’s very good at drawing or painting but she still does it anyway because it makes her really happy

Pierre once said “love you” while talking on the phone with Andrey and he didn’t know what to do so he just PANICKED and chucked his phone across the room but he forgot to hang up and it turns out Andrey didn’t even hear what he said after all

ehhh hopefully this is pretty good? it was fun to make and made me laugh while writing it but let me know what you think!! and please add on to this post, i need more modern au headcanons hhhhhh

[onestowatch]

An Interview With Hippo Campus: The People’s Band

There are certain bands that are meant to be heard live. You are meant to hear the lead singer’s sarcastic quips, meant to see the guitarist’s and bassist’s mid-song guitar duel, meant to feel the lyricism of the songs invade your mind, and ultimately, meant to sit back and listen to some damn good music while it all plays out before your eyes. Indie pop-rock band Hippo Campus is one of those bands, and believe us, they are well on their way to headlining major stages across the globe. 

Self-described as a band “that people really connect with,” Hippo Campus is comprised of four 21-22 year olds: vocalist Jake Luppen, guitarist Nathan Stockar, bassist Zach Sutton, and drummer Whistler Allen. They’ve amassed a strong following over the past three years by dropping a few EPs and hitting the road with bands like Walk the Moon and Saint Motel. 

On March 1, they released their debut album, Landmark. The record is chock-full of catchy tunes that are reminiscent of the band’s signature progressive, sunny sound. Hippo Campus has spent most of 2017traveling for their very own headline tour in support of the new release, but have since postponed shows due to lead singer Jake Luppen’s case of the flu.  

I spoke to Luppen hours before they took the stage in Washington D.C. to discuss their new album, why everyone is so wrapped up in their age, and how they’d like to be perceived as a band of the people.

Ones To Watch: Congratulations on your first album! How does it feel to finally have it out now?

Jake Luppen: It feels awesome. Obviously, we’ve been working on it for a long time. The whole process took 8 months so it feels good to finally have it in the world. It’s definitely a little bit weird to have something you’ve been so close to for so long be available for everybody to listen to, and to gain their own experiences from, but I think overall it’s a really great feeling.

OTW: Let’s go back to the beginning--you guys met at a fine arts high school. Were you in two separate bands at the time?

JL: Yes, Zach and I were in a band called Blatant Youth and Nathan and Whistler were in a band called Northern, and we used to play shows together in high school.

OTW: When did you guys form Hippo Campus? Were you still in high school?

JL: Yes, we were still in high school. I think it was the beginning of senior year when we technically formed in secret actually. [Laughs]. We didn’t really want the other members of the other bands to know because we weren’t sure if it was gonna be a real thing or not, but Nathan and I throughout junior year had been jamming on and off for a while.

OTW: That’s a little scandalous! [Laughs].

JL: I know, it was scandalous. It was terrible when the other bands found out. They found out in the worst way possible, or at least Zach and I’s band did.

OTW: Oh no! What happened?

JL: Zach left his Facebook open, and we had a Facebook group. The other guys from Blatant Youth saw it, and they were pretty upset with us for not telling them about it.

OTW: So you guys formed your senior year. When did you start to gain recognition for your music?

JL: That wasn’t until probably about halfway through my freshman year in college. The local radio station sort of caught on to what we were doing, and they started spinning us, and that’s kind of how we gained some traction in Minnesota. We played a few college gigs too. We were in this one battle of the bands, which we finished second in actually. [Laughs]. But it was mainly the local stations that kind of got us some local attention.

OTW: It’s really difficult to make the decision of choosing to pursue your dreams over your education. What had to happen for you to ultimately leave school?

JL: I was attending the University of Minnesota. I went there for a year and a half, and Zach went there for half a year. Basically we got our first tour offer and I was sitting in a philosophy class, and I remember opening my e-mail and our manager sent over the first tour offer. 

I texted my mom, and I was like, “I like college but I think that I need to pursue this. I think I need to leave and try out touring and stuff.” It all went over pretty well.

OTW:: Let’s talk about the songwriting on the album--it’s really well done. It feels very intricate and thought out. What’s your favorite song lyrically?

JL: I think “Vacation” is probably my favorite song lyrically on the record.

It’s kind of the most raw and the most real. It’s honestly the least thought out, I would say...those were pretty much kind of the first words I wrote. It directly deals with the struggle to write the record and maintain relationships within the band while writing this record, because it really tested all of us. I think it’s just kind of an informative song--you can hear a lot about the record, and the way it was made in the song.

OTW: Is there a particular topic that you like writing about or that you’re drawn to?

JL: I think it varies. It’s all about what you’ve experienced, and what’s honest at the time. I think with this record, obviously we had two years of touring experience after having never done that before. It made that pretty easy to write about on this record. We kind of undertook writing about some social themes, especially with people our age and the way social media influences us. 

That’s another thing we had to immerse ourselves in, is this world of social media--and as an artist, whether we want to or not. We have to engage our fans at this level. So that was definitely something interesting to write about--this world we are kind of forced to be in when we don’t necessarily want to be in it.

OTW: Does anyone else write lyrics as well?

HC: Yeah, Nathan will write lyrics with me.

OTW: The album feel very cohesive but then you have two writers, which can bring up different thoughts and views. How do you maintain that cohesiveness?

JL: We usually split it up song to song, so you can point to a song, like “Monsoon,” Nathan would write the majority of the lyrics to that one. But “Vacation,” I wrote majority of the lyrics to that one, as well as “Way It Goes.” It’s just like that but there’s usually maybe a line or two where one of us will serve as an editor or something like that. It allows things to feel cohesive, but it allows you to have some sort of editor or moderator, and someone to bounce ideas off of which has been helpful. This is the first band where we’ve both kind of done that in, and it’s been nice. 

OTW: I saw you perform at SXSW, and there’s a natural chemistry between you guys and the audience. Has it always been that way, or is that something that has progressed?

JL: I think the live shows have always been our bread and butter. It’s been the thing that keeps people coming back to us. 

I feel like it’s kind of hard to understand what we’re doing unless you’ve seen it live because it’s kind of a different experience. You see a lot of bands that don’t look like they’re having fun when they’re performing, and it just makes it taxing to listen to. A show should be a fucking good time. I mean obviously you should be able to play and be able to perform everything, but you should just be fucking having fun. That’s what people are there for. It’s always been important to us--to have a good time at the end of the day.

OTW: How do you cope with that, specifically as the frontman? Are you an extrovert or an introvert, and how does that translate on stage?

HC: Honestly, I think I’m more of an introvert. I think in my personal life I don’t really have that frontman persona--I really don’t like being the center of attention.If someone had just met us at a party, they’d probably think Nathan or Zach is the lead singer because they’re louder, and I guess they can deal with attention probably better than I can. I can recognize that I can do it onstage--it’s weird. It’s like playing a character. I sort of like play a version of myself.

Photo: Hippo Campus Facebook Page

OTW: That’s why I asked because I feel like you have this alter ego thing going on onstage, and it works really well.

JL: Nice, yeah totally. You kind of have to do that. It’s good to have that separation because otherwise your head could start getting fucked with pretty easily if you don’t have a divide. If you carry this artificial reality that is the stage offstage, shit can start getting super weird. It’s kind of nice to have the divide. I think it’s that for all of us. We have a sort of divide between our offstage and onstage persona.

OTW: Is there any advice or tips that have helped you guys when performing live?

JL: I like the one that goes, instead of talking a lot at our shows, just shut the fuck up and play. I think there’s something nice about that. It’s fun to engage people, but at the same level, sometimes it’s nice to just have the show be entirely about the music, and not be about any single one of us saying weird things. It’s about being thankful to be there and saying that, but I think it’s good advice to just fucking play music. You don’t always have to fill any sort of awkward space with talking. It’s alright to just be present, and hang out and have a good show.

Photo: Connor Siedow

OTW: You guys have played shows with a lot of really cool bands like Modest Mouse, Walk the Moon, and Saint Motel. If you could tour with anyone, who would it be?

JL: For me personally, I’d love to tour with The Shins. I fucking love The Shins. They’re one of my favorite bands. A tour with Death Cab for Cutie would be pretty amazing. Obviously the big ones like Radiohead. They would be an amazing band to play with. Sylvan Esso. We’ve only hung out with them once, but it would be cool to tour with them at some point.

OTW: You guys are playing a lot of festivals this year, including Bonnaroo, FPSF, and Lollapalooza. What’s the highlight of that lineup this year?

JL: I think they’re all going to be pretty awesome. One of my favorite shows we’ve ever done was at Lolla two years ago, so I’m very much looking forward to coming back again. Bonnaroo should be awesome too. It’s our first time. It’s our first time at FPSF too, but I’m really looking forward to Lollapalooza. I think that that should be fucking awesome.

OTW: What do you think sets Hippo Campus apart from other indie bands?

JL: It’s hard to answer this question without sounding egotistical. We occupy this weird space right now. I really want to have a good answer to this question because it’d be good for people to hear it, because it’s like alternative people pigeonhole us as an indie band, and indie people pigeonhole us as alternative. I think inherently we want to be an indie band, or inherently we’d want to be like a press band, but I think that what we’re doing resonates with people, as opposed to like publications or tastemakers or anything. 

We’ve gotten some good press, you know, but I think what makes us different than a lot of indie bands is that it’s just resonating with real human beings on a different level than I’ve seen. If you went to our shows, you wouldn’t expect there to be that many people there, enough people who are deeply affected by it. 

I guess what makes us different is I feel like we’re a people’s band. We’re not a press band, and we’re not really a radio band. We’re just kind of a band that people really connect with, and I’m fucking proud to be that because that’s what is most important. 

Hopefully I didn’t sound too much like a dick. [Laughs].

OTW: No way, that was awesome. I think you summed that up really well. Is there anything now that has to happen for you guys to feel like, “We’ve made it”?

JL: I don’t think we’ll ever feel like that. I think we’re all pretty hungry individuals, so it seems like things are constantly growing, but nothing is really ever good enough to settle on, and I hope that’s something we all maintain. It’s important to not get comfortable. It’s very easy to get comfortable in this business at a certain level but I think it’s a goal to always grow and to always push and stuff because we can always do better. I think we’ve tapped into like 30 or 40% of the potential that we have writing and performing. I feel like there’s a lot of room left to grow.

OTW: A lot of people tend to emphasize your age. Do you think starting out young limited you guys in any way?

JL: Not really--if anything it benefited us. I guess it limited us in the way that every article will start off with, “Fresh out of high school, youngsters..they have a sound way beyond their years.” If I had a nickel for every time that we had “a sound way beyond our years,” I would be quite rich. It’s beneficial in the way it gives us an excuse at times. People are like “Oh well, they’re growing,” which is fucking true. We have to remind ourselves of that. I’m happy people want to write about us, but if we never had another article that started with “local youngsters” or whatever, I would be very happy with that.

OTW: Well shit, that was my headline!

JL: Fuck! [Laughs].

OTW: Who are three artists on your Ones To Watch list?

JL: This band called Whitney are pretty new. They’ve kind of come up as like press darlings. I’m really excited to see what they do in the future. I think there’s a lot of room to grow, and I think they’re a really cool band.

There’s a band from Minnesota called Remo Drive who I will always shout out. It’s like emo rock or punk. Emo revival is the right genre now. Anthony Fantano blogged about them and brought up a few of their music videos that have over 200k views now and shit, so I think they deserve more attention now than what they’re getting in kind of the local music scene, as far as like radio and press and stuff. I think that they’re gonna fucking blow up.

This band called Happy Children is another band too that I think is gonna do really well. They’re great homies, and Whistler actually produced their EP. So shout out Happy Children. Shout out Remo Drive. Shout out Whitney.