#in a world where hes self aware
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if Crozier had a nickel for every time someone close to him kept a mortal wound secret from him he'd have two nickels which isn't a lot but it's definitely enough to give him some very specific trauma for the rest of his life
#blankzier#fitzier#The Terror#Francis Crozier#I must say generally I think we are all collectively sleeping on some very interesting parallels between Blanky and Fitzjames......#I'm a lieutgirlie so this really isn't my department but I wanted to start some thoughts percolating within smarter people's brains on this#Also someone PLEASE write a fic where they both survive and he becomes paranoid about their health and safety QwQ#I want it now even though it would surely destroy me.........#Starky's original posts#Starky's text posts#as I said of course I am a lieutgirlie and the parallel of Edward and Crozier both ''losing two friends in one day'' is just diabolical#and one of my favorite things in the world to imagine is Ned becoming absolutely neurotic about Hodge n Jirv in a survival AU#just full on needs to have at least one and preferably both of them in his line of sight at all times or he starts hyperventilating#and I think the idea of Crozier feeling like that would also be very interesting and even more complicated#because he'd be much more successful than Edward (typical) at being self aware and repressing it which only makes it worse naturally lmao#and also because Blanky and Fitzjames definitely seem like the types who would chafe at that sort of thing lol#whereas I think tbqh Hodge and Jirv would be so messed up they'd be only too happy to embrace the codependency <3 yay <3#To Have And Have Not Lieutenant OT3 Version. Find it in ao3 bookstores whenever I manage to actually finish writing it.#christ look at all those tags. OP make a post about something without mentioning the Lieutenants challenge. failed catastrophically.
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inkybinkyboink · 9 months ago
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holy fucking shit i finally Get It. i finally Get urinetown. i get what little sally says when she says "urinetown is here", it's because urinetown is a world where everything wrong with society is placed into one box. what's interesting about this, and this is what makes it so intrinsically Brechtian, is the fact that even though urinetown is conceptual, it's still inherently society, because all of the conflict in the story stems from real life issues.
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crimmsonflower · 7 months ago
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shoutout to the writer of my favourite lawlight fic to ever exist
killing my self because I forgot to save it and they deleted the fic
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monkee-mobile · 8 months ago
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do you think if any of the monkees tried to actually kiss in the 90s special, everything would like glitch out for a bit and a lizard sunning itself of a rock would snap them out of it or would they be able to break free and show the kiss to the people?
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starboy-ships · 2 months ago
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Reading a piece about hope and social justice for a class and now my head is swimming with Cronus Ampora characterization thoughts because uh... HOPE 🤭
"The idea that hope alone will transform the world... is an excellent route to hopelessness, pessimism, and fatalism." <- This... THIS... I know this is just me making things up because I have no canon evidence but- BUT- Cronus during his youth perhaps wanting to make a better world but being complacent and just hoping things will be better without taking tangible steps... he leans into wizardry and convinces himself that this will right all the wrongs... so when he discovers wizardry is fake he has nothing left... if that isn't going to fix everything... if he can't fix everything with the wave of a wand and a bit of hope... then how can anything be fixed at all?
He's all talk and no action. He might believe some of the things he says... loosely... but he is too afraid of having to work and deconstruct and struggle so he just gives up over and over and over again. He buys into things for a fix and when it doesn't solve all of his issues in one fell swoop he assumes it's fake- it's broken- it's pointless without understanding change takes time and things need patience and work to be achieved.
We see him make attempts at being a better person to make people like him more, but he drops these attempts as soon as he starts them because people don't immediately like him or accept him or change their minds about him. He understands that being less classist is considered a likeable trait but when he tries to act less classist (without actually committing to this goal) people see right through him and (knowing his patterns of behavior) don't trust him. So he assumes this strategy is bullshit and switches tactics. He doesn't understand that he can't just make surface level changes to rearrange his entire life he just assumes (or dare I say he... hopes) that the basic change will wipe the slate clean.
Like... someone please say any of this makes sense...
HE JUST PLACES ALL HIS EGGS IN BASKETS MADE OF HYPOTHETICALS AND THEN GETS FRUSTRATED AND BITTER WHEN IT TURNS OUT YOU CAN'T RESOLVE EVERYTHING THROUGH SHEER HOPE AND FANTASY!!!
Cronus COULD be a parallel for Feferi but NO ONE sees this vision but me. <- (words of a guy who is off the deep end)
@adiosterror <- tagging you because i need someone to hear me and pretend that what im saying makes sense at all
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writhe · 2 years ago
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#TAGS TLDR YOU CAN NEVER TRULY GO HOME BUT DO YOU WANT TO?#writing a little for d&d and having feelings about this#it was really interesting jasper and i were working on some game mechanics and we kept getting stuck at weird parts and it developed into#this conversation where we realized we experience the world#in such fundamentally different ways. like specifically talking about how paranoia#manifests and stuff but even later in a broader sense like our experiences of time and everything is so different#and they'd be like 'well what if this is something that happened to lock' and id be like 'how could that be something that anyone would#experience' and they were like 'oh because i do'#(example here was my character not realizing he had been magically transported and filling in the blank with vague memories of travel but i#was like. are you not acutely aware of every single moment you are awake and in motion even if it is excruciatingly boring. and jasper#was like. 'oh...no. i could be transported from one place to another and if time passed i wouldnt even think about having traveled or not'#which was WILD to me but then we were like 'okay i guess this cannot be something that happened to lock' because i couldnt even fathom that#but like anyway idk we got weirdly deep dive-y about d&d stuff and personal lives and i had big feelings on it bc genuinely i feel like#there are facets and caverns in myself i have only ever touched in storytelling but particularly in this campaign#and i've joked a lot about Lock and other chars in this game being self inserts#but i mean it in a good way#like the ways we tell stories or experience a world we created together is going to be through an extension of ourselves etc#but it's interesting to me to consider the limitations that brings yknow? we all live by such vastly different sets of rules and#understandings#and im writing out some stuff now and im like. yknow.#lock can never truly go home. i can never truly go home. none of us can ever truly go home#home as shifting impermanence home as transience etc#2017 levi is back apparently but hes always been right
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aq2003 · 5 months ago
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i'll be honest i genuinely thought patrick marber wrote dj for david to play him (what with the "are you a doctor?" and "is it time?!" lines) but i found out that no this was written in 2006 for the guy that played the lizard in the amazing spider-man movies. and also both of these lines are in the original. that's crazy
#don juan in soho#david tennant#the most notable changes made were dj's big monologue near the end#and also instead of dj saying (essentially) 'well at least i'm not a rapist and a pedo' he says 'well guys at least i'm not donald trump'#haha........ha.....................ha.....................#oh and the addition of a the music/dance numbers#i told myself i was just going to read the script but then i ended up watching the play again (while reading alonside). i have a problem#I KIND OF THINK DJ IS ONE OF DAVID'S MOST CHARACTERS EVER????????!!!!! im insane#like there are so many elements to dj that i really love from other characters that he's played before#like kilgrave's fundamental selfishness and how he never grew up n only lives for his own pleasure n hurts everyone around him w/out a care#ten's inability to live without the company of others and how he reckons w mortality and dies without reaching catharsis#richard ii and how he starts off unaffected/unlikable but you see more and more of his humanity as the story goes on + he loses his power#hamlet's revulsion with the inauthentic nature of the world that he lives in and how he struggles w his Awareness Of Self#but like i feel llike dj is written in such a way where he's intentionally ambiguous and it's difficult to pin him down completely and that#makes him soooooooo interesting so interesting hwoever this means writing real analysis about him is kind of so hard#i'm putting him in the salad spinner#and then im sending him to hell again god what a deeply terrible and unpleasant person <3
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c0rpsedemon · 2 months ago
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i think if shirou ever did transition post-hgw she'd wear a lot of denim skirts
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Do you ever read a post where someone is explaining a pokitical thing and from the way they're saying you know with absolute certainty 1) they got their info from a tumblr post and have never actually followed up on how feasible that information actually is to act upon (they may not even have checked if it was CORRECT, but when they do they have clearly not looked into how easy or hard it may be to follow those instructions with a positive outcome), and 2) you know WHICH tumblr post they're quoting because it is basically a copy/paste of it, and 3) it was YOUR goddamn post and the thing they are saying is entirely counter to the point you were making when you said it to the point that you genuinely wonder if they just like. Memory-holed the entire context once they saw that one itty bitty point.
It's like the motherfuckiny dating apps all over again. I do not want people to love my words if they are not actually willing to do the work of understanding them! Didn't your kindergarten ever make you play Telephone to teach you how heresay falls out????
#sometimes i feel like a prized 12 point buck and everyone is desperate to give chase so they can skin me and wear my pelt in memorium#the luxury of being seen is rarely extended to those we perceive as confident/constant in their sense of self#the path of being a child who was constantly told i was making people uncomfortable and alienating my peers#only to immediately become an adult who everyone perceives as so together that they are just Like That With Everyonr#brennan said something like this in the disection of a recent misfits and magic episode about sam (character)#and how he (as evan) realized that the charm and specialness she gifts to everyone around her means that no one ever really gifts it back#and how that fundamentally felt transcendent and revelatory for evan as a turning point idea#he'd spent so long never trusting others feelings of care for him that he couldn't see how he was bulldozing right into and over sam's own#insecurities about whether or not she is worth loving or is special in the same way#and then they had some back and forth about like#sometimes when you develop the skill of relateability and pacification#you disappear so deeply into it that no one notices you're gone - even you yourself - until it's too late#it put to words a lot of the like#gap. that i've always felt between me and others. this insistance on elevating or pathologizing me depending on where they feel the need#to be in relation to me#while having absolutely zero awareness of my actual positioning in relation to them#i have found that they way i interact with others seems to give the impression that because i am being 'genuine' and 'open' about myself#that ALSO means that I am sharing the whole of me.#and when i talk about destigmatization and shame and people work really hard to be like. aware of the edges of me to carch me embarrassed#like if they can prove that i don't 'admit' something it's because i'm ashamed as opposed to considering that maybe they don't have the kind#of relationship with me that would warrant the sharing of it#because i'm willing to talk i am no longer allowed privacy or it's treated as incongruous#but like. i am different people for different people and they are all authentically me but they are also about faciliting the version#of the other person that matters to me to be able to spend time with. i'm not going to bring the parts of me that put you in a bad mood#or aren't comfortable/safe for you. also probably not going to put those things out into the open world as a mixed company conversation#i don't know where I'm going or where I came from here but i think the point is just that I think there's melancholy in seeing when#you also don't know a reliable way to be seen in turn
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crossbackpoke-check · 3 months ago
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re last answer: please don't stop, being very unhinged about these two pretty white boys is helping distract me from the sharks losing streak rn so bring it on
https://www.tumblr.com/bondedpairs/764566430180147200?source=share
(sideblog woes but there's the link for you) anyway in the vid they talk about going over to each other's houses to have dinner and things and while that is a delicious example of their codependence i love it bc through an rpf lens there is definitely some old man ******* going on. they can have the dilfs and each other.
(someone else mentioned kept boys which i could write an essay on but i fear being Perceived™️)
anyway if you have anything to add to this please do, if not ignore me and i will hide under a rock until the stress-related insanity has worn off and i am a functioning member of society once more 😂
- @bondedpairs
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ty for the video!!! and please, WRITE THE KEPT BOYS ESSAYYYY i promise i will read it with my hands over my eyes if you don’t want to be perceived. do it scared!! do it anyway!! we’ll all love you for it!!!
#like. i don’t know how to explain how narratively aware will smith is to me. he knows he’s being put into the codependent rookies arc.#he’s aware that zeev buium transforms into a dog. he knows that he and mack aren’t getting together because mack’s gotta work it out first.#& in a less unhinged way i simply mean that will smith has an air of both self-conscious thought & projection i think is maybe fascinating.#but not in a way in which i actually know this or think that he thinks about himself and how he comes across. he just Is Something ????#the best way i can explain is one of my alltime favorite fics i use it like a shorthand citation bc i love it so much but catchascatchcan’s#many worlds universe but specifically the second tk/pat story second person you the ouroboros spits out its tale nolan walks off screen.#like that is the kind of narrative awareness i am trying to explain that no matter where i put him will smith knows he’s inside a story but#not in a way where he’s trying to do anything to it. he’s just present there. this makes no sense to me either please understand#liv in the replies#bondedpairs#happy to have brought you something in your times of woe!!! ​also hope things get a little less stressful for you!! <3#we’re 2gether p much 24/7” no go on i say in my nature documentary voice. watching them like bugs under a rock rn observing from a distance#this DID get me to actually watch the video. agreed with puckpocketed saying rich text and ur tags like. YES the daddy issues popped out.#just wants to make sure he’s having fun!! checking up!! mack the prime irritance in will’s life!! foisted off on one another w/ no choice#it’s like when your parents are friends so then you have to be friends with their kids in a way and then also like. you’re the only kids#close in age to each other but they’re NOT but it is definitely not like. i would choose you for any lifetime it is very will smith hockey#(once again) very aware he has to wait for mack to settle down. like now that i’m saying this i DO want clairvoyant will smith which is not#where it goes in the first half but just in the sense of like. those silly posts that are like ‘invested early in stock!’ & it’s a picture#of braden holtby & his beautiful bisexual wife brandi back when holts was a hipster who wore skinny scarves & now everyone thinks he’s sooo#like that but it’s will smith saying my god you are insufferable but you’ll be fantastic in five years. get in the fucking car.#(yes i am drawing extensively from the one picture where will has COMPLETELY tuned him out (there is a football reasoning reference here?#with the patriots? neonfretra drew this also but it was a tweet about the teams. there’s layers to this here ANYWAY) we’re building a life#i realize after the fact i addressed neither the dilf (gilf?) fucking here nor the content of the actual video & polycules to which i say:#brain scrampled egg. the burnsie/joe/patty/(pavs???) polycule just exists to me and the kids intersect the venn diagram but in a much#smaller portion than they intersect each other in both ways (will/mack joe/the guys)#also as for the content of the video. you’re gonna have to give me at LEAST (how long did it take me until i actually started posting tzjd?#i hate that this is my metric but it really was like. i see everyone yelling about them & i’m like ok. [please ignore the irrational hatred#i have for tz at the time it has to do with moritz seider and also whenever i see him on the ice something awakens in kill mode] and i DO#blame tzjd for my 800 drafts and it took me like. a good while before i finally went OH kay. i see it. okay i can get invested. horizon at#a 45 degree angle moon in the late waxing gibbous winds scented of orange & blowing S by SW from the vortex cycle etc etc ass conditions)
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mbat · 17 days ago
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trying to show someone something you think is really cool and they just shit all over it
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infizero · 8 months ago
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his faceeeeee someone get me OUT OF HERE
#i rlly like that line of hers though. her first priority is always helping people#thats why i love sapphire so much shes brash shes tough shes rude but at the end of the day she is a hero!!#she is SO rpg protagonist. going around helping ppl even tho she doesnt have to. without even a second thought#she gets strong IN ORDER to help people!!#and ofc ruby wants to help ppl too but he IS quite a selfish person. and i think that probably stems from the fact that he has historically#not been allowed to do the things he wants to do and be who he wants to be. being stifled like that ofc when he goes out in the world#his priority is gonna be on finally fulfilling his own desires. but he DOES care about other ppl and wants to help when he can#but helping out here would mean throwing himself into the role of a trainer and being defined by his battle skills which is like.#literally the last thing he'd ever want to happen. but he cant communicate this to sapphire BCUZ OF BEING RAISED IN A HOUSEHOLD#WHERE HE CANT TALK ABOUT HIS FEELINGS. SO INSTEAD OF EXPLAINING WHY HE DOESNT WANT TO HELP HE JUST PUTS#ON A FRONT AND MAKES HIMSELF LOOK LIKE AN ASSHOLE#GODDDDDDDDDD these characters make me crazy like even if it wasnt intentional the ways in which their upbringings affect how#they act here is soooo fascinating. esp since they are literal children so they're still in that era of their lives where they really#are just kind of mirroring what they've been taught and not self aware enough to analyze WHY they act in these ways#serena.txt#pksp reread#ruby & sapphire reread
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thebekashow · 11 months ago
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beka's adopted father (before bob)
he is a bit too silly. but dw, he's nice :)
sorta ._ .
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vveissesfleisch · 1 year ago
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BORGIAS SEASON 2 FINALE????????? HELLO?????????????????
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ryuuseini · 2 years ago
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God I wanna... Say Something regarding fatphobia in media and the terms ppl use in describing characters who gain weight over time ("letting go" like bro shut the fuck up???) and how like, there's also nuance to the discussion (like, a character who starts out on the heavier side choosing to lose weight shouldn't be demonized either - as PLENTY of people want to lose weight for various reasons, and while you can point to a decent amount of it stemming from our fatphobic society, a lot of it is also just personal desire at the end of the day - but I also understand that if your ONLY fat character loses weight at the end and the other characters don't change either, then that's not good) but idk, I'm a little too tired to properly articulate what's going on in my mind? But I just... wish this was more of a discussion
#fatphobia#like - this is coming from someone who is overweight and is very visibly so#and yeah i do wanna lose weight simply because i dont like the way it distributes on me#but theres also the pressure of my mom who thinks its just wrong of me to be this weight and im like ??? pls stop#but I know for ME its more a personal desire#but i think my biggest issue is that like. bc we're at a state of representation where the bare minimum is never met#we're pushing for a monolithic representation of a far more diverse group#which. yes. i get it. ppl shouldnt be reduced to 'hi im fat bc i love food' and that be all rep#like no i 100% agree with that like a character shouldnt be striped down to solely be about being what marginalized group they are#but humans are so fucking nuanced that like. i DO want to see a character who does have a vibe of 'i like food!!' but have OTHER traits#like you have the skinny anime boy who has a million of other traits and cannot solely be defined by 'loves food'#but you also see them literally DROOLING over food and ordering a shit ton of food and somehow eating it all and like#and like the fact that here im specifically talking about Luke Yugioh Sevens who i would ACTUALLY describe as a kid who has like#ZERO awareness of the world outside of himself but does have a strong sense of self worth and genuinely wants to be great#but is very much aware he has to EARN that and doesnt want to be handed it... makes you wonder why marginalized identities dont have nuance#like??? pls just... make ppl human. humans are messy. thats what MAKES us human#this kinda got away from me but yk what i mean im tired lol
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laudofthedeep · 2 years ago
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it’s been like ten years since i read it and im still not over the book i read that was like “he had never been completely naked in the last thirty years, not even for sex” like my guy that didn’t even break the top twenty questions i had
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