#imdrowning

[scarlet-abyss]

Welcome to another episode of your girl here is ✨fucked✨

Did I play russian roulette and stop watching lectures for a few weeks? Yes.

Am I tryna catch up on overdue shit? Yes.

Please wish me luck. Thank you and bye bye.

[urlocalmitskiluver]

why do i crave your affection, miss?

am i so starved of maternal love that i cling to my teacher’s validation? is it because other girls call me names, cackling, and i need reassurance that im not weird or a freak? my periods two months late. i have no mum to tell me im growing, that its natural. am i pregnant? am i dying? you say my essay was good, im talented. more. i need more. tell me im the best, im your favourite, im a poet. im no poet. i know this. i just need your adoration. i need a hug. please tell me ill be okay. you have five children? no. you will always have six, in a way. you stopped me from killing myself once. you dont even know i was suicidal. you dont know any of this. you dont know me, at all. to you, im just the quiet girl who knows big words. you dont know that i feel like an open wound, a dried water stain, a broken cog in a big machine. you know nothing.

and you’re still the closest thing i have to a mother.

[brokenglassrainynights]

I hate when someone wants to be there for me and wants to listen and all I can think about is “how can I put this is in a way that won’t make them run off”. Why can’t I just be me? Why does there always have to be something?

[chilean-boy]

AHHHHHHHHHHHH

[egalisiert]

I’m drowning

[absentfuckingminded]

Do the trust issues ever go away?…

[langhiyangloveyan]

as the weight of everything pressed down on me, everyday i find myself standing on the edge of despair, feeling like i might fall into the abyss anytime soon. each breath feels heavy, and every heartbeat reminds me how alone i am, like joy had been stolen away. i tried to reach out to friends and family, but it seemed like everyones moving on with their lives while im stuck in a gray world. their laughter feels like a cruel joke, a reminder of the warmth i used to have. i want comfort, yes, but the idea of anyone getting too close made me uneasy. i dont wanna drag them into my darkness. it feels like im in a crowded room, surrounded by familiar faces, yet completely alone, like a ghost in a life that didnt feel like mine anymore. the doubts and sadness growing louder, drowning out any hope. sometimes i could almost hear the tempting call of giving up, promising an end to the pain and a break from the constant anxiety that had became my shadow. this is one of my darkest times, and the thought of moving forward feels impossible. every day is a struggle, a battle against the invisible chains that is holding me back. i wanna scream, to let the world know how trapped i feel, but the words never come. they're stuck in my throat, tangled with fear and shame. the nights are the hardest. when the world quiets down, my thoughts become a chaotic storm, swirling around my mind. id lie in bed, staring at the ceiling feeling utterly lost. the darkness wrapped around me like a suffocating blanket, and i wish for nothing more than to escape it. i rmmber the pact i had made with myself long ago, the promise to choose peace over pain. it was a promise that had been buried beneath layers of obligation and expectation, but now it resurfaced, clearer than ever. i envisioned a quiet place, free from the chaos, where i could finally find solace. the thought brought a strange sense of calm, a flicker of hope amidst the darkness. i try to distract myself, scrolling endlessly on my phone, hoping to find something, anything, that could pull me out of this pit. but all i find are images of happy faces, adventures, and laughter. its like a knife twisting in my gut, reminding me of what i dont have. i wanna tell someone how i feel, tell them about the things trapped in my mind, but its locked away like a secret i couldnt share. i started to isolate myself. id decline invitations, make excuses, and hide away in my room. it felt safer this way, away from the world that seemed to move on without me. maybe if i just stayed quiet, the pain would lessen. but it only grew heavier, like a weight on my chest that i couldnt shake off. the days blurred together. mornings were just a reminder that i had to face another day, and nights filled with thoughts that spirals out of control. wishing for a way out. the darkness feels like a thick fog, wrapping around me, making it hard to see anything beyond the sadness. sometimes, id catch a glimpse of something that reminds me of happier times. a song on the radio, a photo on my phone, or even a smell that took me back to a better moment. but those glimpses were fleeting, and the pain would come flooding back. i feel like imdrowning in my own despair, unable to find a lifeline to cling to. i wonder if anyone would even notice if i disappeared. would they care? would they even remember me? i know i need help from other people, but the thought of reaching out felt daunting. what if they dont understand? what if they judged me? the fear of rejection is paralyzing, and ig its better if i just stay trapped in my own mind. i know i need to find a way out, but the darkness feels suffocating. its like trying to breathe underwater, impossible to find air. i feel like im running out of time, like the darkness was closing in on me.

[thewhispers]

Coming back to Tumblr just because i need a place to hide. But then when i saw his previous post, i missed how miserable our love was. Im sorry im such a mess...from the beginning until now. #ImDrowning

[metalheadtilimdead]

[lonelyghoststuff]

I keep holding onto this hope that you'll call me and work things out... but I know it won't happen, I know I've lost you...

[thistimeisdifferentiswear]

I think it’s time to give up on my family.

They’ve clearly given up on me.

[themanicroom]

My mental stability is slowly getting worse. I told my doctor, and they want to take me off my mood stabilizers and anti depressants. In turn, lithium would be the replacement.

The catch? I have to get bloodwork done first. It's nearly impossible to get this done between my work schedule, and being a full time parent.

I feel so discouraged. It's getting harder and harder to see the light.

[brokenglassrainynights]

I want to learn to forgive myself for the things I did when I was trying to survive.

I want to learn to forgive the things that J did when I was coping alone and saw no way out.

I want to learn to forgive myself

[salenaass]

i deadass don’t know what to do anymore.. i lost my boyfriend, mamaw, and my job in one month.. i’m so close to giving up.. help me please..

[camillebozabdos]

A very short animation I made for our FX movie. @martin-robic did the layout and @paulinemauviere did the background and compositing! You can check the movie we made as a team with @lilblueorchid here: 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_J1B0eKwogQ

[mohnman]

Can't pick a better day to finish this I guess. I think I'll paint some day though. #Freedom #liberty #unclesam #America #imdrowning #helpmebreathe #mohnman #currentevents #history #statueofliberty #ladyliberty #watchmedie #mohnman https://www.instagram.com/p/CBn4CFXjZqU/?igshid=c2rpe93df2p8