#imagine what it does to a person to grow up thinking their purpose is to be spare parts for the REAL child. to be cut up and picked over!!!

[alicentsgf]

Thoughts on Travis?

I honestly kinda have a soft spot for Travis ? and I've really enjoyed his evolution.

We meet this boy whose been raised in a clearly unhappy home by a father he didn't have a good relationship with, whos instilled so much self-hatred in him, and who dies. Like hes dead, Travis will never get the chance to have the conversations he wanted to have with his dad. He will never get to question him or yell at him or have any kind of honest relationship with him. Travis in season 1 is consumed by the machismo mindset, but it clearly makes him so unhappy. He doesn't want to be that person, he's gentle, he loves his brother, he loves nat, he wants to be kind, wants to protect, theres this huge internal battle between what hes been taught and what he actually wants for himself.

Imagine you're a kid and your dad is a soccer coach and there is such an emphasis on the physicality of masculinity. You are nothing, not even really a man, if you aren't strong. And then Travis gets sick. Literally has to have surgery on his spine, he can't play sport, at least not for a long time. It may have been the one way he could connect with his dad, and its taken from him. Theres a lot of jealousy in his feelings towards Javi. Their dad doesn't treat Javi the same way, hes gentler with him for some reason whether this is because of Javi's age or ability to still become the man their dad hoped Travis would be.

And then Javi dies too. Unfortunately I don't have to imagine how that feels just in isolation. When my sister died, it was like someone had amputated half my soul. Felt like I spent all my time trying to find that part of me again, and tbh I don't know if you ever really do. A part of you becomes numb because it has to, otherwise you can't cope. Travis starts self-medicating to help him cope even further, is drunk most of season 3 imo. Javi was his little brother, Travis was desperate to protect him. It was all he thought about in season 2. Travis lost his purpose when he lost Javi, and it's like hes clawing his way back his little brother in everything he does. Sleeps holding his little carved statuette, surrounded by his drawings. Travis even begins to draw, he becomes gentler, more like Javi. Just like Misty grasps for Nat and Shauna for Jackie through a poor imitations of the person they've lost, Travis does the same.

His position within the group is interesting as well. Hes both fully integrated and yet still an outsider. We see this reflected in the adult timeline, where hes incredibly isolated in a way the others arent. He doesn't have a family or community. He doesn't even have anyone looking out for him like Nat does, because for him that person was Nat and hes cut himself off from her.

Travis is the personification of what it is to be untethered by grief. He loses much more than his family. He loses his sense of self. Hes torn by faith, swinging between belief and skepticism. He becomes increasingly passive and yet more violent. Whilst he interferes with both hunts, never participating in either, he ultimately, yet indirectly, causes both Javi and Mari's deaths. He instigates the actual 'hunting' part of the hunt when he tells Nat to run. He built the pit. His culpability becoming more apparent. So unable to commit an act of active violence in the case of Lottie, that he condemns an innocent person to die as a result. Meaning he ends up further encouraging the violence and depravity he means to free them all from. And this isn't a condemnation, I don't condemn Travis for wanting Lottie dead with all the pain she's caused him, but also i don't think hes as blameless in season 3 as people tend to act like he is.

I'm looking forward to seeing what coming home looks like for Travis. I imagine the plane crash, the loss of her whole family, changed his mother irrevocably. In which case its not really a surprise Nat and he grow back together, with neither of them really having a family to support them.

[writers-potion]

Storyediting Questions to Ask

As You Read the First Draft:

Are there place that surprised you as you read your first draft? - Why do you suppose that is? - Is there material there you'd like to expand?

What are the character really doing in this story? - Might they have issues you haven't explored fully yet?

Look to the places that drag. - These might be scenes where you have avoided dealing with something deeper. - What are the characters really thinking in these places? - What are their passions, frustrations, and desires?

Imagine alternative plotlines. - How might your plot be different if ti headed off on another tangent from various points in the story? - You don't have to follow them, but they might suggest other streams that can flow into the main plot.

Think About Structure:

Does you story play out naturally in three acts?

Is there an immediate disturbance to the Lead's world?

Does the first doorway of no return occur before the one-fifth mark?

Are the stakes being raised sufficiently?

Does the second doorway of no return put the Lead on the path to the climax?

Does the rhythm of the sotyr match your intent? If this is an action novel, does the plot move relentlessly forward? If this is a character-driven novel, do the scenes delve deeply enough?

Are there strongly motivated characters?

Have coincidence been established?

Is something happeing immediately at the beginning? Did you establish a person in a setting with a problem, onfronted with change or threat?

Is the timeline logical?

Is the story too predictable in terms of sequence? Should it be rearranged?

About Your Lead Character:

Is the character memorable? Compelling? Enough to carry a reader all the way through the plot?

A lead character has to jump off the page. Does yours?

Does this character avoid cliches? Is he capable of surprising us?

What's unique about the character?

Is the character's objective strong enough?

How does the character grow over the course of the story?

How does the character demonstrate inner strength?

About Your Opposition:

Is your oppositing character interesting?

Is he fully realized, not just a cardboard cutout?

Is he justified (at least in his own mind) in his actions?

Is he believable?

Is he strong as or stronger than the Lead?

About Your Story's Adhesive Nature:

Is the conflcit between the Lead and opposition crucial for both?

Why can't they just walk away? What holds them together?

About Your Scene:

Are the big scenes big enough? Surprising enough? Can you make them more original, unanticipated, and draw them out for all they are worth?

Is there enough conflict in the scenes?

What is the least memorable scene? Cut it!

What else can be cut in order to move the story relentlessly forward?

Does the climactic scene come too fast (through a writer fatigue)? Can you make it more, write it for all it's worth?

Does we need a new minor subplot to build up a saggin midsection?

About Your Minor Characters:

What is their purpose in the plot?

Are they unique and colorful?

Polishing Questions:

Are you hooking the reader from the beginning?

Are suspenseful scenes drawn out for the ultimate tension?

Can any information be delayed? This creates tension in the reader, always a good thing.

Are there enough surprises?

Are character-reaction scenes deep and interesting?

Read chapter ending for read-on prompts

Are there places you can replace describing how a character feels with actions?

Do I use visual, sensory-laden words?

For a Dialogue Read-Through:

Dialogue is almost always strengthened by cutting words within the lines.

In dialogue, be fair to both sides. Don't give one character all the good lines.

Greate dialogue surprises the reader and creates tension. View it like a game, where the players are trying to outfox each other.

Can you get more conflict into dialogue, even emong allies?

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[a-confused-spoon]

...y'know, it's not just the fact that Caitlyn knows Viktor, but the fact that this Caitlyn met this Viktor

I know I already talked about this, but like- HELLO??!

Mind you, Caitlyn isn't just a little sister to Jayce, her parents are also Jayce's patrons and her mother works with Heimerdinger (who Viktor used to work for) on the Council- the Council that basically dictated what kind of use hextech was going to serve in Piltover for however long the timeskip was (as said by Jayce in 1x04), so there's no way these two didn't have at least a couple interactions once Viktor becomes Jayce's partner.

Tell you what, I think these two vibed pretty well too.

First thing first, I just know Caitlyn treated the idea of meeting Viktor the exact same way a younger sibling wants to meet their older sibling's crush; "yeah I need to meet this so-deemed super cool person so I can shit-talk about you to them 'cause it's fun, but also what makes them so special to you and/or so stupid they'd want to spend time with you, allegedly?" type of deal. And there's more to this too 'cause- no wait, I really need to stress this point:

I think it's safe to assume Caitlyn didn't have many friends growing up, if any at all, and Jayce (who's what, twice her age?) is seemingly the only person she shared a bond with where she didn't have to pretend to be someone she didn't feel she was, which only became more and more a thing as time went by.

And everything is fine until the events of 1x02: there's an explosion, Jayce is put away, there's a trial and all of the sudden she's lost her big brother under no explanation other than "he's a misfit and you can't be friends with him anymore", and as far as she knows, Jayce will no longer be in her life and will likely give up all his hard work. She lost her best friend and he lost his purpose in life, all in the span of a single day.

...and then, the very next day, everything seems to be fine again? There's a Council meeting, she's allowed to be cool with Jayce again and when she asks what the fuck happened to this man he opens with "So there's this guy...".

I can only imagine little Caitlyn's thoughts whilst she was processing all the new info: "Okay so you're telling me there's a guy with a funny accent, Piltover's most important person's ex assistant, who I nor anyone's ever heard of nor seen for some forsaken reason, who you met literally last night and he sweet talked you into not giving up because it didn't work when I tried- rude but okay- and then he convinced you to commit a crime to help you complete the research my parents funded? When you were already at risk of exile? And that research was super personal to you specifically, but now it's a you guys' thing? And he's from the- WAIT, HE'S FROM THE UNDERCITY?!!"

'Cause Caitlyn was curious about the undercity as a kid too, innocently so; you're telling her she has the opportunity to talk with someone who didn't just go there, but used to live there? Someone who managed to get where he is with nothing other than the sheer power of will?!

Meeting this Viktor guy is no longer just a little "I wish", it becomes a fucking mission.

...meanwhile Viktor's barely aware the Kirammans have a daughter to begin with.

I mean- he does know, but just because Jayce mentioned her a couple times, perhaps forgetting to mention her being a 14 year-old. Not that Viktor would give a shit either way, he isn't really fond of anyone in Piltover (aside from Jayce, Heimerdinger and Sky) and the likely spoiled heir of an ultra-rich family is no exception to this, regardless of age. However, she is close to Jayce, and her extremely important family is funding what is also his research now, so he's like "whatever, I guess I'll be as cordial as I can with this miss Caitlyn if I ever meet her".

Which happened, at a certain point in time.

I think Viktor was pleasantly surprised to find out that this good hearted and fairly smart girl was also very curious to know more about the undercity- perhaps he's taken a little aback at first; she is a councilor's daughter and he has to pay attention to what he says around her after all. But at the same time, she is a councilor's daughter and if she's so well intended then why not answer truthfully to her questions when she could, one day, help through her family's influence?

And on the other side, little Caitlyn absolutely adores Viktor, and not just because he's witty and has a funny accent, but because Viktor talks to her like she's an adult. Cait isn't really used to this sort of treatment, but of course Viktor doesn't address her like a clueless child that needs protection from the real world: that's a privilege the kids in Zaun aren't really given, and they are no less important than her. Besides, what's the harm?

It's also great because whenever the Kirammans organize a ceremony of sorts to celebrate some new hextech achievement as Jayce's patrons, Caitlyn and Viktor would manage to chat separately from the rest of the obnoxiously rich guests, so she doesn't have to feel out of place or babied and he doesn't have to be at the centre of attention as Jayce's partner. Viktor would also get a healthy dose of rich people gossip through little Cait's unintentional open disdain for the environment her parents keep her in, and the only reason why Caitlyn allows herself to lower her guard when talking about it is because she knows damn well that Viktor both probably agrees and has no intention nor reason to tell anyone. If anything, he just comments sarcastically to most stories, and she's happy she can share them with someone who won't say "now now, don't say that about so and so".

And of course, whenever Caitlyn comes to visit them in the lab (not a very common occurrence since the 1x01 accident), Jayce is just happy to see them getting along... whenever Caitlyn isn't whispering something to Viktor while they both look at him, at least.

[pyrodolls]

SUPERFAN! YANDERE BOY X POPSTAR! READER (YANDERE ALPHABET)

WARNINGS: a little nsfw, mentions of murder and violence, kidnapping, breaking and entering, stalking, depression, masochistic yandere, kinda worshipper yandere, some mentions of "offing" himself, mentions of death and starvation, established relationship, lowercase intended, not proofread, reader is gender neutral, i do not condone yanderes irl.

A/N: i was gonna do a request but uhhh i felt lazy. i'll make an alphabet for victor next cuz i feel bad for not writing him. plus i'm gonna try to make a masterlist soon so yippee! (also i apologize to all my non-yandere-enjoying followers that like my mortal kombat works, i'll get back to those someday. i just look back on my old works and cringe. i really dislike all my stuff from 2023.)

Affection: How do they show their love and affection? How intense would it get?

bayani loves you with all his heart. he is often overbearing and obsessive, treating you like you're the only thing that matters. he is always fussing over you and making sure you're okay. he constantly asks you how your day has been, if you've eaten yet, if there's anything he can do for you, etc. he is your little servant. please make him feel useful. please let him help you. his only purpose is to entertain and satisfy you in any way he can. whether you want him to cuddle and kiss you often, or you want him to cook and clean for you, whatever you want. he doesn't have a particular love language. even if he did, he would change it to cater to your taste.

Blood: How messy are they willing to get when it comes to their darling?

bayani believes violence is not the answer. he does not want to hurt anyone. but if it's for your safety, or if you order him to hurt or even kill someone, he would reluctantly do it. as much as he denounces violence, he cannot find it in his heart to disobey you. even if it is someone he knows, he'll do it for you. because if you think they should be dead, then you must be correct. bayani believes you can do no wrong, so he must act on your orders.

Cruelty: How would they treat their darling once abducted? Would they mock them?

bayani would not abduct you. he would never do anything that would hurt your feelings. as much as he gets off on being physically tortured and verbally berated by you, he cannot imagine a world where you dislike him or hate him in any way. he would never kidnap you. besides, even if he wanted to kidnap you, his apartment is too shitty to keep you there, and he wants you to live a life of luxury.

Darling: Aside from abduction, would they do anything against their darling’s will?

bayani would absolutely not do anything against your will. he is nothing but your servant, and your fan. he does anything you want him to. he could never go against your will.

Exposed: How much of their heart do they bare to their darling? How vulnerable are they when it comes to their darling?

bayani is yours. he has put his whole heart out for you ever since he first saw you. from being your biggest fan, to stalker, to boyfriend. since day one he has been (mostly) open and vulnerable.

Fight: How would they feel if their darling fought back?

bayani would absolutely be turned on by your rage. kick him, spit on him, etc... the bulge in his pants would just grow harder and harder. however, as much as he enjoys being used as your personal punching bag, he doesn't want you to hate him. if you hated him, he might as well throw himself off a cliff. why should he live if you don't accept him? if he's not enough for you? he dedicated his life to following everything you did as a popstar, to dating you and doing everything you asked him to. so if you ended up hating him after everything he did for you, he wouldn't know what to do with himself.

Game: Is this a game to them? How much would they enjoy watching their darling try to escape?

it is not a game to bayani, not one bit. i can't see him kidnapping you at all, but if he did it would probably be for your safety. he would hate to see you so sad and desperate to leave. he'd try to give you whatever food or gifts you ask for, to distract you from trying to escape. it's for your own good, please don't cry and scream at him.

Hell: What would be their darling’s worst experience with them?

as much as bayani respects you, he often forgets your boundaries. he would break into your bedroom and watch you sleep, steal your clothes, or watch you while you shower. no matter how many times you try to tell him you're uncomfortable with his behavior and wish to have some alone time, he'd always claim that he would "respect you from now on" but the next day he'd go back to his perverted ways.

Ideals: What kind of future do they have in mind for/with their darling?

bayani is hoping to get married and live happily ever after with you. he doesn't see himself having kids, he'd prefer to keep all his time and attention on you for the rest of his life. as much as he supports your career and music, a part of him hopes you retire early so you can give him more attention. but if you want to keep up your career for a few more decades, that's okay with him too. whatever makes you happy, makes him happy.

Jealousy: Do they get jealous? Do they lash out or find a way to cope?

bayani rarely gets jealous. but when he does, it's concerning. when he sees you hug or compliment a fan, he understands it's not romantic. he doesn't really care about it at all. however, if he sees a fellow popstar being a little too close to you or flirting with you, he immediately worries about himself. what if you leave him? he isn't attractive, or talented, or rich. you could easily leave him for a fellow popstar. bayani wouldn't blame you at all, or the popstar flirting with you. he only ends up looking in the mirror and picking himself apart for hours, wondering why you decided to date him. after that, he ends up being even more clingy than he was. he is basically glued to your hip, and doing everything you ask of him. he compliments you more and tries to make himself seem more energetic and loving. he even looks up ways to make himself more desirable to you, and trying out obscure skin care routines and putting lifts in his shoes. he tries to make himself better for you so you wouldn't leave him.

Kisses: How do they act around or with their darling?

bayani's basically a dog at your beck and call. he sits near you with hearts in his eyes, ready to tend to your needs. he usually talks to you nonstop, yapping about something he saw on the internet you might like or a bug he saw on the sidewalk. of course he'd stop if you ask him to, but he's just so nervous around you! even after you start dating and he's no longer just a superfan, his little crush on you never fades away. he covers up his anxieties by talking about anything and everything. if you were to engage in his little yapping sessions, or even laugh at his jokes or agree with his opinions, he'd get extremely flustered and shy. he'd try his best to hide it, but his tomato red face would give it away.

Love letters: How would they go about courting or approaching their darling?

bayani wouldn't even try to ask you out. he thinks of himself as nothing but a broke, ugly, stalker guy in love with you and your career. he thinks you're way out of his league. you would have to be the one to notice him and strike up a conversation. even then, he'd evaporate the moment you lay your eyes on him. but the more you notice him at your shows and interact with him, you'd become friends and then you'd have to be the one to confess to him.

Mask: Are their true colors drastically different from the way they act around everyone else?

bayani's true colors aren't too different from how he acts with others. he's truly a perverted, shy, stalker. his whole life, even in childhood, he was always shy and never really talked to anyone. he didn't have any friends, wasn't in any clubs and didn't go to a church of any sort, so he was always alone. of course, nobody knows he's a perverted stalker, but it's easy to tell he doesn't speak to anyone but you.

Naughty: How would they punish their darling?

bayani would never punish you. he thinks you can do no wrong. whether you simply lashed out at someone, or committed a crime, he would always be on your side. even if you were to lash out at him, he'd accept it. he would never blame you, only himself.

Oppression: How many rights would they take away from their darling?

bayani would never harm you in any way because of how much he loves and worships you. he'd never take anything away from you.

Patience: How patient are they with their darling?

bayani would do anything for you, so of course he'd be very patient with you.

Quit: If their darling dies, leaves, or successfully escapes, would they ever be able to move on?

bayani would not be able to live without you. if you left him, he would understand, but be heartbroken. but if you died, he would immediately lock himself in his apartment and refuse to eat or drink anything, and soon succumb to his own death. a life without you is a life he cannot live.

Regret: Would they ever feel guilty about abducting their darling? Would they ever let their darling go?

bayani, again, would not kidnap you. if he did, i can imagine he would feel severely guilty about it. he hates seeing you in pain. if you're in pain, so is he. he would let you go as soon as he knows it's safe for you. hell, he'd want you to be free more than you do.

Stigma: What brought about this side of them (childhood, curiosity, etc)?

like i mentioned before, bayani had a very lonely childhood. his parents weren't present, he had no friends or siblings, so he was left all alone. even when he graduated highschool and was left to live alone with a shitty job, he was still antisocial and had quite a dull life for a few years. that's how he discovered you. he never knew what it was like to love or be loved until he saw you and heard your music for the first time. your performances were a safe place to him. your lyrics were like a warm hug to him. you saved him from his miserable life. he started dedicating his life to you since you were the first person he truly cared about.

Tears: How do they feel about seeing their darling scream, cry, and/or isolate themselves?

bayani hates to see you in pain. he wishes he could take it all away for you. that's why he's so attentive to your needs, in hopes that he'll never have to see you cry or hear your screams in pain.

Unique: Would they do anything different from the classic yandere?

unlike the classic, stereotypical yandere, bayani does not want to inflict harm on anyone unless he has to, and he's a lot clumsier than a usual yandere. he does not want to kill or hurt anyone, but if you really wanted him to, he would. but there's no guarantee that it'll go well, considering how clumsy he is. but he's trying, for you!

Vice: What weakness can their darling exploit in order to escape?

bayani is a worshipper, through and through. you want to leave him? just tell him. he'd be heartbroken, and probably beg you not to leave him, but ultimately he wants you to be happy. however, if he ever kidnapped you, you could escape by distracting him. you could point somewhere in the distance and go "look over there!" and he'd look for a couple seconds, then look back at you- and aw shucks you already ran away

Wit’s end: Would they ever hurt their darling?

bayani. would. never. even. dream. of. hurting. you.

Xoanon: How much would they revere or worship their darling? To what length would they go to win their darling over?

bayani would literally commit war crimes for you if you asked him to. there is nothing he wouldn't do for you. he sees you as a hero that saved him, so he believes he should return the favor by doing anything for you. anything to keep you happy.

Yearn: How long do they pine after their darling before they snap?

after being your biggest fan and stalker for years, bayani is content with staying that way for the rest of his life. of course he would love to be yours, but he would be happy with simply watching you from afar for as long as he shall live. he would never snap.

Zenith: Would they ever break their darling?

depends on your sanity, and how much you like bayani. if you're okay with his clingy, clumsy, yapping self for the rest of your life, then you'll be fine. but if you'd get sick of never having a lot of alone time, or having a guy that is attached to your hip... then maybe you'd break and he would be incredibly guilty. he would try to apologize by being even closer to you, which would make you feel worse. unless you end things with him, you're stuck forever.

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[traveler-at-heart]

Stuck Together - Part 5

Summary: After Westview, Wanda and her children go into hiding. She's not happy with the person in charge of protecting them.

Wanda Maximoff x F! Super Soldier R

It takes a minute to gather her bearings.

When Wanda opens her eyes, there’s a soft light filtering through the bedroom window. The twins are asleep next to her, still too scared to go to separate rooms even if your house was big enough.

Careful not to wake them, Wanda leaves the bed, finding one of your hoodies and wearing it before stepping out. For a moment, it feels like she’s back in Westview, before the illusion was completely shattered and she had to face the facts.

And somehow, this was better than anything her magic could have created. Everything comes together in this piece of land to give a complete feeling of calm and quiet.

“You’re up early”

Wanda turns back, expecting to come face to face with you. Except, it’s muzzle to face, as a horse is staring at her.

“Hi. Uh, yeah. I wanted to stretch my legs for a bit”

“Funny, we were doing just that. Lou is a very stubborn girl, so if I’m not around she gets restless”

Lou steps forward, and you think it’s because she doesn’t know Wanda. To your surprise, she smells her, nuzzling against her face.

“Hey, she likes you”

Wanda knows next to nothing about horses, but you’re holding the reins so confidently, riding as if Lou is an extension of your own body.

“Wanna go for a walk?”

“The kids are still asleep”

“Riley will take care of it” you whistle and the dog, that was walking besides you, goes back inside. “Won’t let any stranger inside, promise”

Before Wanda can tell what you’re doing, you lean forward, picking her up easily so she’s sitting before you, her back to your front.

“Is this ok?” you ask, arms trapping Wanda and keeping her close to your body, as you’re still holding the horse reins.

“Yeah. Fine” she says, hoping you don’t notice her blush.

You make a clicking sound with your tongue, Lou advancing immediately at the command. She admires the farm that’s been in your family for three generations.

There are apple orchards, cherries, pumpkins and even some fraser fir around. Wanda listens intently at the stories of the place, how it became pivotal to keep the small town alive.

“It’s beautiful. I can’t imagine growing up here”

“It was fun” you admit, making Lou approach one of the trees. You reach your hand forward, and Wanda has to remind herself to breathe when she feels your hot breath against her ear. “Here”

You hand over an apple, Wanda sinking her teeth and moaning at the sweet taste.

It’s your turn to squirm in your seat.

“It’s delicious”

To give Lou a break, you get off and help Wanda as well, your hands lingering on her waist.

“Can I ask you something?” she says, looking at the river.

“What about?”

“You don’t think I’m a monster? You heard what happened”

“Lou likes you, and she’s a good judge of character” you say with a smile. Wanda looks away, and you know she needs to hear more than a joke. “Look, you didn’t do it on purpose. You’ve been through a lot of shit than most people your age. This is why I always told the team they should let you have a normal life”

“You did?”

“I fought so hard for them to leave you alone. Go to college or something. Instead they throw you into dangerous missions. I never liked it” you shake your head.

“I thought you didn’t like me”

“You were ok. A little bratty sometimes” you joke, and this time, Wanda does roll her eyes. “Always running your mouth”

“Yeah, I think you had some ideas on how to get me to shut up” she turns to face you, arms crossed in a way that has her breasts pressed together. You gulp, flushing.

“Ok, that… I’m sorry. I don’t know what came over me. I’m not one to be so crass. Or disrespectful”

“So, you don’t mean it?”

“I don’t know. Maybe. I guess I do have a thing for redheads with green eyes and attitude issues”

It’s meant to be a joke, of course. But Wanda’s insecurities come crawling back when she feels you’re comparing her to Natasha.

Natasha, the hero who sacrificed herself for the universe. The woman that dedicated her life to cleaning her ledger, changing her legacy.

You look in shock as she turns around to leave, and this time you decide to follow after her.

“Hey, can you please explain why all of the sudden you get pissed at me?” you reach for her hand, and she yanks it away. You know that if you try again, she’ll blast you all the way to the river. “Wanda!”

“I get it, ok? I’ll never be as good as Natasha. But I’m not second best, or her stand in just because you’re bored. I always liked you, and you’re out there saying you’d rather be in a world where she is alive and I’m nothing. That’s fine. But I didn’t ask to be brought back at the expense of her life. And I won’t apologize either, not when this gave me Billy and Tommy”

With that, she turns to walk back to the house.

You don’t follow her.

—

This was a mistake. Wanda sees it now. Spending all this time with you, while she’s still so vulnerable and shaken up…

You were never meant to find out about her feelings. Truthfully, she was hoping it was just a crush, something she developed because she felt alone and lost.

Well, she’s still alone, and lost. But there’s more to it. The way you protect her, how you interact with the kids… taking them in to your own home without question.

But it all leads back to her, doesn’t it? The Sokovian Accords, the snap, Natasha’s death. It was all because of Wanda. And you’ll never see past that.

They have to leave, and soon. Before Wanda falls deeper in love and gets hurt again. She won’t be able to take it this time.

As her thoughts begin to spiral, Wanda feels the walls of the room closing in on her. Where will they go? How does she even start over, after everything that’s happened?

She’s not even aware of her movements, until she opens the door, meeting your hesitant eyes. You were about to knock, hand in the air.

“Oh. Hi” you say, clearing your throat. “I… uh, I’m sorry, Wanda”

“What for?” she says, trying to ease her breathing.

“For making you feel… unimportant. For implying it would be better if you weren’t back. Truth is… it is what it is, and everyone made their choices. But you’re not responsible for that, and I’d never blame you for it. And if it came across that way, I truly am sorry”

The few times you’ve managed to speak to Yelena, you always say the same thing.

Natasha made a sacrifice to bring her back. To give her a chance to have a good life, one that was worth living.

Didn’t the same thing apply for Wanda?

Couldn’t it apply to you as well?

“So, here…” you hand over a bouquet, with flowers you picked along the way, after she left you by the river.

“Thank you” Wanda accepts them, trying not to read too much into the gesture.

It’s just a peace offering.

“Sykes told me they want to throw a small party, just to welcome you. So, do you want to?”

“That’s hardly necessary” Wanda leans against the door, smelling the flowers.

“They insist, and I promise the food alone makes it worth it. The kids will have plenty of friends to play with as well”

“Alright then” she nods, smiling as you push yourself off the doorframe.

You’re walking backwards, admiring how breathtaking she looks holding the flowers and smiling at you. Like she’s in love.

Maybe you’re a little bit in love too, who knows.

Weirder things have happened.

“Shoot” you say when you crash against the couch, eyes still on her.

“Watch where you’re going” Wanda teases, and you roll your eyes.

Yeah, you’re in big trouble.

—

For the next week, a pleasant routine settles. You insist that they’re free to come and go, use anything they need or want from the house. You don’t impose your ways into the Maximoffs, but they fit perfectly in your own little world.

Wanda has it memorized by now. You get up early, run to the town -what’s 15 miles back and forth for a super soldier?- bring back the paper and some pastries. Because you do have a very sweet tooth indeed.

By the time you’re back, Wanda’s in the kitchen making coffee. You’d usually take Lou out, but the kids like to walk around with her, even if she’s only accepting Wanda in her orbit.

While you wait for the boys to wake up, you drink coffee with Wanda, sharing the paper and commenting on the latests news. You also do the crossword puzzle, which takes you both a good ten minutes to complete.

Once every animal in the farm is taken care of, you return to have breakfast. Wanda’s getting creative with her recipes, taking advantage of the garden you have, growing several things that she loves to pick up every morning.

An unexpected turn adds another thing to the routine.

One time, when Lou yanks at the rope that Billy is holding, you reprimand her.

“Lucille!”

“Lucille?” Wanda tilts her head, intrigued.

“Like Lucille Ball, from I love Lucy…”

“Of course. Yes! Do you like the show?” Wanda says, excited to discuss one of her favorite sitcoms.

“Obviously. I grew up watching all of those. Dick Van Dyke Show, The Mary Taylor Moore Show… man, those were the good days of television”

“Oh, there are some good shows out there now”

“Friends was the last one I saw” you admit, and Wanda gasps.

“Modern family?”

“What?” you tilt your head in confusion.

That’s enough reason to start a nightly watch of a couple of episodes, once the kids are asleep. It’s fascinating to Wanda how you miss so much of pop culture, even if you weren’t frozen like Barnes or Steve.

Except today, when the kids decide that they want to watch all of the Cars movies.

“There’s more than one?” you practically shout. “Hell, no, I’m out”

“Sit back down” Wanda says, her hands on your shoulders. She lets them rest there even after you settle back in the couch, and pretty soon she’s leaning against your side.

Sinking into the couch, you relax, though the movie irritates you at times. Talking cars.

Dumbest fucking shit I’ve ever heard.

“Swear jar!” Billy turns from his spot on the floor.

“Nu-uh! I thought about it, didn’t say it out loud”

“Mom!”

“Swear jar” she says, eyes glued to the television. You scoff, but one arch of her eyebrow has you standing up to put a buck in the jar.

“You said two bad words. That’s two dollars” Billy watches you like a hawk.

“Fine! Happy?”

Still, you can’t believe there’s a third movie.

“Ok, tell you what. Tommy and I will race. If he wins we watch it. If I win… we watch literally anything else”

The boys agree, if only because they love to compete. You walk outside, Wanda right behind you.

“You sure you’re up for it?”

“Yeah, I’m a super soldier” you say, showing off your muscles.

“You’re a hundred years old” she adds, laughing. You glare but not for much longer, as Tommy is bouncing on his feet, ready to compete.

“Alright, first to do five laps wins” you say, high fiving all the Maximoffs.

“Ready, set… go!” Billy says and you start running.

You keep a very tight race for the first three laps, but then you start to fall behind.

Oh, no.

He was slowing down to go at your speed. Tommy’s gonna beat your ass. You push yourself, running as fast as you can, but in the last lap, you can practically hear him breaking the sound barrier, birds flying out of the trees, scared at the booming sound.

“Ah, crap” you hold your side, breathing heavily. “I can’t take another Cars movie. Kill me, please”

As you plop down on the grass, Wanda stands next to you, smiling.

“Don’t be so dramatic. Come on, a bet is a bet” she extends her hand for you to take it and stand up.

And you do take it, but instead you pull her down with you.

“Stop it!” she laughs when you’re tickling her sides, rolling around in the grass as you both laugh. “Ugh, you’re all sweaty and stinky, let me go”

“Nope”

“Please, please, detka” she laughs and the pet name takes you by surprise.

You know what it means, after all. Wanda seems totally unaware of what she just said.

“Ass” she mutters, but there’s no malice in her tone.

You smile at her, heart beating out of your chest.

“Guys, come on! We want to watch the movie!”

“Can we get pizza?”

“Loser pays the pizza” Wanda points at you and you groan.

“So not fair”

But truth is, you don’t mind at all.

—

Movie marathons can be just as exhausting as the other kind. The kids are fast asleep and Wanda excuses herself from the nightly Modern Family rewatch, feeling a bit tired as well.

But the thing is, she’s staring at the ceiling, thinking about the way your hands felt all over her body, laughing in her ear as you teased her.

The weight of your body on top of hers. She has to take a couple of breaths to calm her racing heart. After a few minutes tossing and turning -at least the kids are in a room of their own now- she decides to head to the kitchen and make some tea.

To her surprise, you’re sprawled across the couch, and the minute you hear her come in, you change channels.

“Were you watching porn?” she jokes and you scoff.

“Weren’t you exhausted?”

“Can’t sleep. What were you watching?”

“Nothing” you answer, too defensive for Wanda’s liking. She stays silent for a moment, and then launches forward, hoping to take the remote away from your hands.

“Maximoff!” you groan, struggling with her. Truth be told, either one of you could outpower the other; your strong build helps, and Wanda, well, she could kick your ass with her magic.

But all you do is pull and push, giggling and joking until Wanda snatches the remote, changing the channel back.

“Ancient Aliens?” she says, laughing, and you bury your head in your hands.

“It relaxes me” you say, your voice coming out muffled.

“How so?”

“Because! It’s so fucking stupid. What do you mean fucking aliens built the god damn pyramids?“

“Aliens exist”

“I know that. I fought them a couple of times, remember? I’m just saying. I don’t think showing humans thousand of years ago how to pile rocks was their priority. That’s just bullshit”

“Such a dirty mouth. You kiss your mother with that?” she jokes.

“I kissed you with that mouth”

It’s meant to be a joke, but then you’re looking down at her lips, and she moves forward, straddling your lap. It gets messy real quick, hands touching everywhere they can reach, mouths exploring each other, and your moans drowning out the sound of the tv.

“Wait, wait” Wanda moves back, though she really hesitates when she feels you sucking on her pulse point, knees suddenly weak. “Y/N, stop”

“Sorry, I’m sorry… Did I hurt you? What’s wrong?” you craddle her face in your hands, thumb tracing her cheek. The look you’re giving her, a mix of adoration, and genuine concern… that’s the most exhilirating part of this.

“I can’t… I care too much. Feel too much. And I’m not sure we want the same things”

“Stay” is all you say, hands going around her waist to pull her closer to you.

“What?”

“Stay. Let’s find out together. I’m just so damn tired… of being angry and fighting the world. Maybe this happened for a reason. Or maybe you’re just horny and I’m attractive enough to pass the time”

“You’re such a jerk” she says, smiling.

“Yeah, but you like me” you smile back, hands traveling lower and lower, waiting for her to stop you. She never does, and then you turn to look at her, tilting your head. “So, what do you say?”

“Stay, huh? I think I can do that”

“Alright, then” you nod, your lips meeting hers once more. 

—

There’s an addition to the routine. After the kids go to bed, you and Wanda stay in the living room. You rarely make it through an episode of whatever it is you’re pretending to watch, too lost in each other’s touch to remember the TV is still on. Most of the times, she ends up sinking in the cushions, smiling up at you, her hair disheveled as you find all the spots that make her squirm, moan and shudder.

But -and you can’t admit this out loud, not yet, at least- your favorite part is after, when you slow down, Wanda leaning against you, your hand going up and down her arm as you talk about everything.

“What’s your favorite color?” she asks, which makes you laugh. “Forget it”

“Come on, I’m teasing” you kiss her temple, smiling. “Yellow”

“All your clothes are black. Or grey. Dark blue” she says.

“I like yellow… like the sun in the early morning. Or the reflection of sunlight in the river. The leaves when it’s fall. Wheat too. Reminds me of the farm. What about you?”

“Blue. What? Were you expecting red?”

“Maybe” you smile against her temple, and she relaxes. You stay silent for a couple of minutes, and she sighs.

“I don’t know what you’re thinking about, but I can sense you want to ask, so just do it”

“Ok, don’t get mad at me. And definitely don’t throw me out the door… I fixed it last month”

“Will the window do?”

“Oh, yeah, feel free to blast me through the glass” you turn around, facing her and she scoots closer. You can tell she’s a little guarded, almost scared. “So, Billy and Tommy… you had them while you were in Westview? Like, how? Created by magic? Is that a thing?”

“I mean, I gave birth to them”

“And is Vision…?”

“I suppose. I’m not entirely sure how it works” she admits with a shy laugh.

“You don’t know how babies are made?”

“No, you idiot. What I mean is…”

“I can show how they’re made” you tease, and she slaps your shoulder to try to hide her blush. Before you can get cocky, she straddles your lap.

“What I mean is… it came from a place of longing and love and grief. And it defied all logic, all the rules of time and space. So, I don’t know. Maybe you are the father”

“Me?! Should I get a paternity test?”

“Idiot”

“I hold in my hand the envelope, with DNA results and the father is...” you pretend to open an invisible letter. “The father is Y/N, oh my God!”

“You. Are. Such. An. Ass”

“Glad you’re all caught up on that” you say, holding her hands so she stops slapping your sides. The only way to make her stop is by kissing her, and you’re more than happy to do so.

If only things were that simple all the time.

—

The next morning, you’re woken up by a knock on your door.

“Y/N? Did mom leave for the store?”

You look around, finding Wanda asleep right next to your side. Well, that’s a first.

“Oh, just a minute” you say. Wanda blinks a few times, then looks around.

“Did I fall asleep here? Oh, my God” she whisper yells, looking around.

“Hey, calm down” you kiss her temple. “I’ll take care of the kids, take your time to do whatever you need. There’s a couple of clean hoodies, since you’re a thief” you try to joke to ease her nerves.

“I just didn’t mean to overstep”

“You didn’t. I slept comfortably. You’re not a blanket hoarder, surprisingly”

“Well, I was expecting you’d snore” she teases back.

But then Billy is joining his brother at the door and you sigh, kissing her before leaving the room.

You tell them that Wanda’s getting some stuff from the garden, and take them outside to feed Lou and walk Riley.

As you walk along the farm, they insist on taking a longer route to play around the lake. You agree, Riley following close behind you.

It’s like every morning, beautiful and quiet.

Except Riley, who’s being too loud today, barking incessantly.

“Girl, what’s wrong? Come here” you whistle. But she keeps barking, her body leaning forward on the edge of the pier, balancing her weight as much as she can so she doesn’t end up in the water.

The kids take notice of the commotion, walking up to you.

“Stand back” you say, kneeling next to Riley.

You see it too late.

A ghostly face. White, estoic, terrifying.

The creature comes out of the water, holding you by the neck.

“I have to kill you”

[love-toxin]

@ eric draven, hes goth and metal And he kills people AND hes a feminist. literally the whole package what else could u want <33

UNNNNNGHHH AND HE'S GOT THE BIG WET PUPPY EYES GRRRAAAAAAAAHHHH

like.....like......imagine after the events of the crow Eric doesn't go back to purgatory or pass through to the afterlife, but rather finds himself staying in the land of the living for some unknown reason. he's got his revenge, he's avenged his beloved Shelley, but what now? what's his purpose?

but the crow won't speak to him any words of either comfort or doom, so he just wanders. wanders away from his city and home until he stops somewhere on the opposite side. spends time thinking and planning and thinking until he drives himself nearly mad and falls asleep. he can't do much else, or at least thinks he can't. when he's found no better place to roam he returns home, but when he steps up the curb to his apartment, he sees lights on upstairs. something dark stirs in him--protectiveness, maybe, he's sensitive to his home being invaded for obvious reasons--but when he leaps up and perches on the ledge of the shattered window he sees somebody he's never met before.

you're just standing in his apartment, sweeping up shards of broken glass like you own the place. humming to yourself. he remembers, briefly, what it was like when there was music in his home. but it used to be Shelley's laughter, and now there's a soft-eyed stranger singing a quiet tune in the lamplight, and he feels the same as he did back then. he sticks to the shadows because he doesn't know what to expect, but you just step lightly around the pile and sweep the glass shards into your dustpan. there's a little electric lantern keeping the place aglow and a few small bags of meager luggage huddled at the front door.

it occurs to him that you might be the new resident as he coldly watches you from a distance. it's obvious that the apartment would be repurposed at some point after his death, but how do you feel knowing that you're taking over the home of a dead man? that you'll lay your head in the same place where a couple were brutally and viciously murdered? where Shelley, his Shelley, was-

you tilt your head. your ears perked at the imperceptible sound and you nearly caught him staring, but he's a lot faster to hide than you are to see.

he leaves soon after that, but he finds himself returning every night. he learns things about you. you're industrious, for one--you work on the apartment whenever you're not working your job, both of which are tough, and you sleep on a hard mattress on the floor. you spend such a long time cleaning but when you find little things left behind of his or Shelley's, you don't throw them out. maybe you feel bad for them. maybe you know exactly what happened, and you don't want to disrespect their memory.

maybe you're a really, really good person that lives for a better world. Eric can't help but think that when he watches you tirelessly slave over renovating his apartment--he can't ever quite see it as something not of his own--taking down what was broken and making it into something beautiful again. he doesn't know you that well, he only hears your voice when you're talking on the phone or singing in the shower, but he grows to like you. you're gentle. you smile at little things and you laugh as sweetly as you cry. even when you feel frustrated or betrayed, when you get violent and punch something out of anger, you just feel it in such a raw way that it entrances him. you're complex. you're gorgeous. you're someone he could very easily fall in love with, but you don't deserve to feel his hurt in the way that he does. you can't shoulder his burdens with him when they're just too great for a mortal life.

so he resorts to watching you and feeling badly about it. he's kind of stalking you at this level, but he goes nowhere beyond following you to work and back and occasionally glancing through your window to make sure you're okay. one time he caught you freshly out of the shower with your towel nowhere in sight--you were out of clean ones and had to go digging--and he felt so bad about it he couldn't be around your place for weeks. but you deserve protection and all the love in the world, and if he can't give you one he can at least give you the other. at this point he would never forgive himself, he would probably burn down the whole city if what happened to him and Shelley happened to you. he would truly lose his mind.

it's only when you catch him that he has to stop and think on what he's doing, because there's no way he can explain himself properly--perching atop the roof of your apartment with the crow grooming its feathers at his side. when you stumble across him he wasn't even paying attention, just keeping an ear out for any screams or cries for help, but you mesmerize him because you're just so....so...

"are you....cold?"

kind. you're so warm he couldn't think of shivering in your presence. from that day on you're aware of his presence but you don't mind it. you welcome it. you don't know who he really is and you probably wouldn't believe him if he told you, but you welcome him in and that's fine because he really, truly is in love with you now. he has to be. because there's no way that his silent heart would start beating again for any other reason, even if it's just a trick of the mind and it's not really true. you touch his hands and feel cold skin and he's definitely still not alive, but he doesn't feel quite as dead as he was, and every day he spends growing closer and closer to you he feels death growing into a curse over a promise. maybe he doesn't really want to go back to sleep after all...not if the world has people like you, and not if a person like you could start feeling something for a restless, morbid soul like him.

[ilylovelyz]

⍣ ೋ fool(s) in love

˚ · . bakugou katsuki x afab!reader

: ̗̀➛ no real warnings, just bakugou daydreaming abt y/n, slight possessiveness on baku's part, mentions of sexual activity, a bit angsty ?, based off "fools in love" by inara george, mentions of pregnancy and marriage

everything you do, everywhere you go now, everything you touch, everything you feel, everything you see, everything you know now, everything you do, you do it for your baby love

fools in love. are there any different kind of lovers?

fools in love, bringing all sorts of feelings, bringing such joy—yet a devasting amount of pain for no reason.

bakugou thinks this as he scrolls mindlessly on his phone, his fingers pressing on your icons and pages.

his red eyes stare at your most recent pictures and stories, checking if you've sent any new messages to him, but there are no new ones because it's 4AM and you're dead asleep and he's here out patrolling. he stalks your page like a stranger, looking at all your highlights and comment sections of your posts, wanting to see for any recent activity. he goes through your followers, not even caring to check your following because you don't even follow people back like that. he scoffs at the new followers, men.

he exits out of the app, instead opening up his phone gallery. he does this without thinking, he's been doing this for awhile. to be specifc, for a couple of years, maybe around the time you and him got serious as a couple.

his mind subconsciously wanders to the memories he has of you, replaying those precious yet idiotic moments over and over. he lets out a sudden chuckle when he thinks of the time you slipped cartoonishly on a banana peel—the banana peel he purposely placed on the floor because he didn't actually think you were dumb enough to slip on it.

but you did—you slipped on it. and then you cried. cried like a baby, and the memory just has bakugou trying to hold back his laughter in order to not seem like a crazy person. looking around, he resumes his daydreaming.

how unusual it is for him to daydream. yeah—he has dreams and aspirations—ones that revolve around him as the world's #1 hero and being beating that dork deku. but what he's dreaming of now has him thinking long and hard.

the corners of his lips twitch up into a soft smile, his red eyes gleaming at the thought of you. the thought of maybe the relationship he has with you going on for longer than what is now. the relationship, growing and growing—just like you and him, reaching important milestones. milestones so important, like having your legal first sip of alcohol with him, buying a house together—or even something way more serious and commiting than that, like marriage.

like seeing you grin and cry tears of happiness when he pops the big question. or a year later, seeing you in a big white poofy dress, similar to a princess dress—because you certainly act like one. and seeing you walk down the aisle to him, all blushed and nervous like how you easily are. his tongue peeks out to lick his lips when he imagines him kissing you as his bride, finally making you his wife.

then there are the years of marriage. the first year, the repeated honeymoon stage, where you'll be sticking to him like glue, waiting in the living room from his return from a long day at work and practically pouncing on him because you missed him so much. the stage where neither of you will be able to keep your hands off each other, kisses and touches fervent and desperate for the other.

then the second year, when you'll be kicking him out of bed and throwing the TV remote at his head when he refuses to order you food at 12AM. maybe this year, or the next, with last year's effort, you'll end up pregnant with your first child, his child. preferably a girl, one that has your cute face but certainly not your bratty tendencies.

then the next years will pass in a blur, maybe you'll bear him another brat or two, giving him the family he secretly wants. you'll be the mother of his children, the matching pepper shaker to his salt shaker. you'll grow old with him, becoming more cranky and argumentative with him about which show to watch. he'll call you a grandma, a old hag, then he'll begin reading signs and posters for you when your eyesight is so shitty after your constant years of nights of being on your phone at full brightness in the dark.

then he'll finally retire and buy the two of you a nice home, preferably near a beach as you'd love. the two of you will spend the rest of your life there, still arguing about what to have for dinner and then go to sleep with your nails caressing the skin of his spine.

when it's that time, before he's too old to make sensible decisions, he'll write out instructions to whoever will take care of you when he leaves. he'll be the one to die first, he doesn't like the idea of living without you. he'll make sure to write in bold letters that you don't like tomatoes or onions, and that you need to be reminded to drink at least two cups of water a day because you're forgetful like that.

he'll buy the two of you shared graves, matching caskets. of course he leaves your side of the grave blank, you'll live on to live without him for many more years despite your horrible diet consisting mainly of soda and candy.

you'll pass away in your sleep, painless and unaware, warm and tucked in the bed you used to share with him. then, you'll join him in the afterlife, slapping and hitting him for leaving you "so early".

bakugou's eyes reopen to his supervisor bidding him farewell, telling him his shift is open and go home and rest. he makes his way home, cussing out the train station workers when his train is delayed by 5 minutes.

when he gets finally gets home, he sets down the teddy bear he bought you on your side of the bed, careful to not awake you. he strips himself of his hero suit, debating whether or not to sleep and then take a shower later, or to take a shower now and then sleep.

you answer for him, sitting up from the bed to sleepily wrap your arms around the small of his waist, the same waist you were cussing him out over due to jealousy. you pull him onto the bed, mumbling little "i miss you"s while also damning him to hell for working so late.

you ignore the fact he smells like shit, that he's dirty and needs to take a shower. instead, you glide your pedicured nails that he paid for over the exposed skin of his shoulders, making their way up his nape then to his hair. he practically purrs at the goosebumps that rise on his skin, his eyes fluttering shut with the way you're lulling him to sleep against his will like you always do.

as he gives in to the heavy weight of sleep, his mind comes back to that wonderful dream he had. though, it goes away once he does fall asleep. he doesn't mind, after all, you're both still young and barely 20. you two have many years ahead, and hopefully, you'll be spending those years with him.

please repost with tags :)

[kestrel-of-herran]

severance season three hints from interviews

take these with a grain of salt as the season is still being written, but i think we can sense some patterns here...

helly interacting with gemma

The moment that was important to me that stayed in the edit, which I’m proud of, is Helly seeing Gemma. Mark pulls her, she lingers, and she’s really connecting with Gemma for the first time. That moment is really essential for what comes next. [...] The whole scene is a reckoning for all of them. Helly is reckoning with this other person who loves the same person she loves, but on the outside. (Britt)

innie rights

All of the Innies are waking up to their own humanity and free will. Dylan is on that journey and even the marching band, another department, is now. Helly’s just like, “Maybe we have more people on our side than we think, and maybe there’s a chance for us down here to figure out something.” (Britt)

mark's development

Outie Mark makes a clear case for what he wants, which is to see his wife again, and Innie Mark makes a strong case for what he wants. That conflict will create a lot of story and tension moving forward, because both of these characters have a very compelling case to make for themselves. [...] Outie Mark’s motivation is very pure — he wants to be with Gemma — but he’s missing the fact that he’s created this other part of himself that he doesn’t want to accept. I don’t think Outie Mark understands that this is part of him, this is who he is. He wants to deny that. It’s obviously a weird, complicated situation that is theoretical, but I do feel like both of these parts of him represent parts that we have in ourselves. (Ben)

Mark’s choice to reintegrate represents a willingness to destroy himself, because he is so desperate to get his wife back. First of all, there’s the question of whether reintegration is survivable, because, so far, the survival rate of it is zero on the show. And then secondly, there’s this question of to what degree you will still be yourself by the time it’s done. [...] Is this something that will fade once they have stopped doing the procedure, or will he continue to see these flashes from his other life? That’s a question that we have going forward.(Dan)

With Mark, we leave him in this place now, where he’s having these flashes between his innie and outie life, he’s not fully reintegrated, but he’s getting these glimpses, and that makes him different from any other severed person on the show. We ultimately want to just live in that world for a while, and that was something we decided not to resolve this season. (Dan)

[The finale] shows innie Mark, having gone through the growth to see himself as an individual worthy of life and worthy of protection, he no longer feels that he is an appendage of his outie or an offshoot of his outie. He, through his love of Helly and his time on the floor, sees himself as a person. But it’s going to drive a hell of a wedge between him and outie Mark, I’ll tell you that much, because while innie Mark did get her to safety, he didn’t follow her and so he has robbed his outie of that reunion, which is what he’s been wanting the entire series, is to be back with his wife who he lost. I would imagine that to outie Mark, that feels like an extreme betrayal. (Dan)

helena's development ft. lumon

For someone to have inside of her a really strong rebellion, how does that affect the company for the greater good? On a personal level, how does the wilder, fiercer, and freer part of this woman — which she has lost touch with — affect her moving forward? What does she have to learn from that? How can she grow and expand? [...] I think she, much like Helly, is on a journey of self-discovery and answering the question Who am I? (Britt)

Of all the outie characters, Helena is the one who is the most masked. I think that she was raised with a very specific purpose, which is to be the best Lumon leader that she can be. I like to think that when she was young, there was a lot more Helly in her. And a lot of that got stamped out. So she’s walking around, playing this character, without even realizing it, that she has been forced to craft. So I think that if Helly seems really different from her, that’s why. (Dan)

As for Lumon, it’s another question that relates to corporate culture. You have Kier, who founded the company, and then all these different CEOs who put their own agenda onto what the company is. That’s an interesting question too — the difference between the core idea of a company and what it evolves into. (Ben)

fade to deepest red

It’s something we haven’t seen before. The colors have been pretty specific in the show. It’s an indication that we’re going to another place now. With red, you think of heart, and love. Things are changing. It’s a different tone. (Ben)

[pinespinespinespinespines]

While Ford was traveling the multiverse, he encountered an alternate version of Earth, right? Similar in many ways except for minor changes. (well, major for Ford and Fiddleford and some other individual people, but in general, the earth itself and most peoples lives is likely much the same in that instutute alt dimension)

What if Ford found an alternate of Euclidea?

And I dont mean Flatland, which he saw in Journal 3. I imagine theres many types of 2d dimensions, just like there are 3d ones. I mean an alternate dimension of Bill's world specifically, where an alternate version of Bill exists. I'm sure I'm not the first one to think about this, but it's just such a fascinating concept to me, so I'm gonna ramble for a bit under the cut!

Bill would be there, snarky but not evil, and the only one able to really see Ford. The other Euclidians can see his shadow or where his feet are, or something, but not all of him. And Ford would have to really mentally separate this Bill and the Bill he knows because at a glance, they're identical.

Except this Bill didn't murder entire species or torment anyone's dreams, (yet?) So Ford doesn't know what to think of him. I suppose this Bill decided that showing his world the 3rd plane wasn't worth his time, or something. Maybe he's still working up the courage to.

Ford would be shocked, maybe even react badly when he sees Bill at first. But then I could see Ford not being able to help himself and his curiosity, giving in quickly and talking to this Bill. And this Bill, he would be less cruel and insane, but a lot more sad and apathetic, as he never got to show anyone what he can see, and just lives with being different.

I feel like this Bill and Ford could become friendly pretty fast - Bill would be so lonely, and Ford would be the first person he meets that acknowledges what he sees, validates his mutation. He would listen to Ford speak about the multiverse in way that isn't dissimilar to how Ford would listen to Bill when he first came in his dreams... but less manipulative. Ford doesn't have a purpose for this Bill to manipulate him for - this Bill doesn't know anything useful - which brings Ford to question his own Bill's past.

How did that cursed triangle get all of his powers, when this Bill has almost none? Ford still believes that another monster destroyed Euclidia, as his Bill told him, and doesn't know whether to tell this Bill or not.

But the more he talks to this Bill, which he has dubbed in his head as Nice Bill (despite the attitude he still has), the more he grows to kinda like him. As in, Ford feels guilty leaving without warning him about the danger. After all, this Bill clings to his every word and has treated him with respect, or at least awe. It's very conflicting for Ford - does he move on, continue his journey, leaving this 2D world behind to potential ruin? Would a warning even matter? Should he stay a little longer and lend a hand? He doesn't even have a clue what 'monster' they'd be looking for. And what does he owe any Bill, anyway!?

At this point, he's been in this Euclidia for a couple of days. He's too large to stay in this dimension's hotels or anything, all the other shapes can't see anything except his shadow. Nice Bill was the one to tell Ford on his first day that he needed to keep his real form a secret, since this society outlawed talk of the 3rd dimension. So hes laying on the ground somewhere outside the city at nights. Not the best sleeping arrangement hes had, but certainly not the worst. Despite that, Ford cannot sleep, plagued with indecision.

In the wee hours of the morning, right before he dozes off for a short rest, he makes his choice: In the morning, Ford will tell Bill about the monster.

Edit: Link to pt 2, a lil comic

[ktjislove1119]

what they'd post on your birthday

-> p1harmony x seventh member! male reader, this was giving more platonic love but i think its still sweeeeeetttt

warnings : none , i think talk of getting old, i guess

rating : fluff 🙏

yoon keeho

- he loves including aesthetic pictures of you (and him) in his dump.

- he likes keeping the messages short and sweet on the internet, but trust the first thing you see and hear when that clock strikes 12 on your birthday is either: a lengthy heartwarming text from him or him just going to your room and smothering you in love.

- he probably will be the first member to greet you because he takes wishing happy birthday to people seriously (secretly holds grudges on everyone that doesnt wish him happy birthday in the first minute of his own) (he does not play when it comes to birthdays). but its because he thinks that theyre such important and sentimental dates.

- always makes it a point in each post and each year on your birthday to say that he can’t wait to grow old with you because he thinks that is one of the most raw forms of love and admiration you can have for someone. envisions a future with you constantly and just gets even more mushy and sensitive about it when your birthday comes around because it’s like, actually real and happening. you two are really getting older together and he just lowkey tears up at the thought of it.

- tries using his persuasive leader skills to get the company to give them all a singular day off to properly celebrate and will try his hardest to fight for this one day off, entirely for you.

- probably cries in his room about it too LMAO i just see him as someone overly sensitive and invested in the idea of growing old with his loved ones, which obviously would include you. thinks about how you two even first met and how you’re both so different now and it lowkey feels like a punch to his gut because the time really is flying so fast.

- keeps the fesitivities of the day wholly centered around you; whatever it is you want to do, he wants to do too! it’s your birthday, they’re all just coming along for the ride since it’s your special day.

choi taeyang

- makes it a point in his message every year to emphasize the fact on staying happy and prioritizing your happiness above else.

- never wants you to forget that you are one of his strongest pillars of support and motivation to keep him going and he very literally needs you to be healthy, happy, and content in order to have peace of mind. he places personal happiness of an individual above everything and really hopes you share that same sentiment so that you can put your own happiness above everything else, too.

- pics he drops of you are very bf-coded lmao don’t ask him if it was purposeful because it wasn’t, he just likes taking off-guard photos of you. he thinks that that is when you’re the most handsome to him, hence why he posts them because he wants others and p1ece to be able to appreciate those photos too.

- makes a lot of jokes on your birthday about how you’re getting old, but are still younger than him therefore a baby.

- i can just imagine him affectionately rubbing his hand on your head or up and down your neck and softly saying that you’re still so young. he feels like reminding you of that fact is important on your birthday, as well as just making you remember that just because you’re a year older doesn’t mean you need to feel rushed into doing something, such as obtaining your goals or dreams. he knows how hard you are on yourself and wants you to know that just because you’re older now doesn’t mean there’s now a timer on how “far” your dreams are now. pulls the “oldest is the wisest” card definitely when he gives you that talk because he’s speaking so articulately on it and solemnly trying to remind you of that fact.

- i feel like he’d be one to reminisce a lot on when you two were younger together, maybe when you were trainees together or just little things you experienced together that you can’t now due to whatever circumstances. speaks fondly of those times, but his heart does ache to see that time is passing by and how different things are now.

- in general, he tries not to be too sappy, but rather keep the mood uplifted and high. he wants you to keep a positive outlook on your life and will remind you that he’s always there for you, to talk or whatever it is you need him for.

choi jiung

- wishes you a happy birthday with the softest smile on his face and maybe even leaning in for a hug, and if he’s really feeling soft about it being your birthday he’ll even kiss the top of your head. it depends on the year, honestly, he’s only done it a total of five times for all the years he’s known you.

- kind of likes to be in control of what goes on on your birthday BUT NOT IN THAT WAY. he obviously doesn’t make the plans for you, chooses things for you — not like that. he just wants to make sure everything is perfect for YOUR day. so he likes to be in charge of cleaning up the place for the celebration, decorating the place, even little things like being the one to place the candles on your cake because he needs them to be perfect and he knows he can do that.

- genuinely will lowkey get pissed or annoyed if any of the members do anything to slightly ruin the plans that were made, shoots them a warning look if even the slightest thing is out of line. he wants you to have this special moment and memory in your mind of how everything was on your special day.

- likes to linger close to you, surveying all the surroundings to make sure it’s too your liking and everything is comfortable.

- in his birthday post to you, he likes mentioning some term of endearment just to show that, while he might not always physically show you how much he loves you, he still harbors such strong feelings of love, admiration, and care for you.

hwang intak

- intak is so incredibly loud and proud each year when it’s your birthday.

- after keeho, he’s probably the next member to eagerly wish you a happy birthday, smothering you in hugs and kisses, squeezing you tight as he proclaims how happy he is that it’s your birthday. jokingly will call you an old man at least once in the day.

- p1ece love his birthday post to you because he drops some of the most top tier pics of you, everyone say thank u intak.

- physically cannot be away from you for too long or else he will start whining about how you have to be near him for your birthday. likes holding onto your arm as an anchor in keeping you close.

- probably another member to quietly cry about how you’re getting older in the privacy of his room or when you all are around the cake, he just randomly lets a tear or two slip. but they’re happy tears, he swears! he’s just sososo happy that you’re life is continuing on for another year AND MANY MORE !!!!!!!! and he just feels so grateful to be able to see you actually grow into such a strong individual, becoming a man he loves and truly admires.

- scrolls through old photos of you and him from your pre-debut days and the smile on his face when he does is so unbelievably wide.

- just a smiley guy throughout the entire day, physical affection amped up to the max, and maybe a tear or two slipping,

haku shota

- the only person to explictly say that they love you in their online post to you.

- loves posting the silliest photos that you two have together, he thinks that that side of yours is one he loves seeing because it reminds him of how the two of you would goof off a lot when you were younger. obviously, having debuted there is almost always some level of maturity and professionalism that you need to show in public. but those silly pics he has of you two together are just cute ways of shota showing everyone, and reminding himself, that at heart, you’re just a silly guy.

- another latcher, along with intak. likes to just be on top of you the entire day, have fun carrying around two fully grown men around with you because these two seriously won’t be away from you for longer than a minute.

- incredibly vocal on your birthday, way more than he usually is because he just loves talking about how it’s your special day, how you’re getting older, but still remaining the same boy that was guiding him when he was a trainee, how much he loves you, how much he hopes you enjoy your day, how- the list goes on.

- will hand you your gift with an eager look on his face, wanting to see you open it right then and there because he was so particular in picking it out for you and wants to see if he did a good job (tell him he did because he did. do it rn. don’t be RUDE tell him or else.)

- definitely not the type to get sentimental though, he doesn’t like looking at birthdays like that. instead, he’s in a completely celebratory mood and outrageously positive the entire day. someone would think it was his birthday from how excited he is about today.

kim jongseob

- jongseob’s post about you is absolutely beautiful and it makes him bashful to read what he feels being made public, but he gets over it rather quickly because he knows that that is how he truly feels and that there’s no other way he could have worded it to you. he also wants people to know how deeply he cares for you and how much admiration he holds for you in his heart. it’s slightly embarrassing, but he gets over it when he hears you acknowledge how his words have touched you.

- he is taking pictures of you the entire day. his film camera, his phone, videoing you as well, he just really wants to commemorate this day and have something to look fondly back on.

- shows you privately, probably at the end of the night when everyone is more worn out, all the photos and videos he had taken of you from all your birthdays prior to this one, smiling into you as you hug him tightly and thank him. he squeezes you just as tight, softly whispering a happy birthday to you and pulling away with a wide grin.

- doesn’t really get sentimental PUBLICALLY, but understands why the other members would. he is secretly super thankful that he gets to be present in your life for each birthday you have had since he’s met you and whenever you blow out your candle, he is, again, secretly wishing with you that you have nothing but a healthy future in front of you. and maybe, also how he wants to be in your life for forever and be there to celebrate every single future birthday with you.

- the next day he looks at the special photo that he has of the two of you in his studio (the one from when you were trainees still — i mentioned it briefly in my other seventh member post) and smiles really sadly at it. realizes that you two will never be those kids again, but snaps himself out of his by reminding himself that he can’t take this present time for granted either.

- jongseob has an undying devotion and care for you that he translates into photos and videos captured of you, smiling softly at them whenever he is in his alone time and just feeling so lucky he gets to really be by your side as you grow older.

[rosesareredrosa]

50 Shades of Grey

Theo Nott x fem reader

Summary: Theo finds one of y/n favorite books on her nights stand which is 50 shades of Grey

w/c: 939

a/n: Some smut not that bad ig i am shit at writing smut

Once I got to my dorm, knowing Theodore, he was already out there sparking up. I stepped in to find Theo with a lit blunt between his lips, his feet kicked up, and he was slouched down in a chair reading a book? Theo wasn't much of a reader, so this surprised me. "Hey! What are you reading reading?" I nonchalantly asked, not even glancing at the cover.

"I don't know. You tell me. It was on your nightstand," he responded, looking at me mischievously. Then it dawned on me. Oh my god! He was reading one of my dark romance novels that I left on my nightstand the night prior. I thought about grabbing it from him, but chances are it was too late. He was already several pages deep.

It was one of my favorites Fifty Shades of Grey. There were a lot of detailed and deranged sexual encounters in it.

"What? You into it?" I teased him. "I'll be honest - kind of," he smirked, and he passed me the blunt he'd rolled. "Why don't you just do one-night stands like the rest of us?" Theo giggled, flipping to the next page, still reading it. I rolled my eyes and took a few puffs. "If you must know," I started, passing the blunt back to Theo, "I do, but sometimes I prefer to read it," I said, biting my lip. "Really? How come?" He looked at me intrigued. "Well, I like how detailed the books are, and I like that I can imagine anyone I want when I'm reading books. When you're with others, you're stuck with whatever usually unattractive person that not my type. Plus, I like having my mind stimulated, not just my eyes and my body," I said, shrugging.

"Oh yeah? And what hot guys do you picture?" Theo asked, teasing me, passing me the weed again. "Like I'd ever tell you," I scoffed. "Why not? Is it 'cause you think about me?" Theo jokingly asked me. However, I wasn't a good liar, and I did sometimes picture Theo. I couldn't help it. He was really hot, even though he was my best friend. I blushed and tried to hold back a grin as I passed him back the blunt. "So you do! You think of me like that?" Theo responded, seductively smiling at me while he took another hit. "No!" I said, but even I remained unconvinced at the way it sounded when it came out.

"Do you ever play with yourself while you're reading these books?" Theo wondered, biting his lip and looking me up and down. "Well, what else would one do with horny material?" I asked, smirking. "Does that mean you think about me when you touch yourself?" He questioned me. Theo loved to stir people up and make them uncomfortable, and it's one of the things, the way he could rile me up so easily.

"Shut up, Theodore," I said, slugging him in the arm. "It's a simple question you've yet to answer," Theo sneered at me. "You already know the answer to that," Theo. Did you come over here just to humiliate me?" I inquired. "Of course not. Only if you're into that," he shot me a look. I couldn't stop blushing.

"You know, this shit is well-written. It's actually making me a little hard," Theo admitted while he slowly started to stroke himself through his pants, looking up at me from the book. Ugh, he was doing this on purpose. "I'd love it if someone took care of it for me," he moaned, seductively grinning up at me and massaging the head of his cock through the fabric of his clothing.

I took in the lovely sight before me, Theo's blue eyes locked on mine, his bottom lip caught between his teeth, his fingers grazing the bulge between his legs. I couldn't control what happened next.

I fell to my knees. I couldn't look at him like that and not help him. My mouth fell open as he took himself out of his sweatpants, It was only half-hard, but it was big. He placed it between my parted lips, and I felt it grow bigger as I explored all the ridges with my tongue, and he responded with a breathy and drawn-out "fuck."

I slowly and sensually worked my way around his whole manhood. I left a long lick, starting at the base of his shaft and ending at his tip. I did this a few times, teasing him while his eyes followed my tongue. His cock lightly twitched, begging to be taken wholly into my mouth.

As I wrapped my lips around the head and took him in as deep as I could, I heard him let out a primal moan. I bobbed my head up and down on him, lightly gagging and making sloppy sounds as my lips glided across his enticing dick. I ever so gently ran my teeth along the tip, eliciting more harmonious sounds from him. "This is the best head I've ever gotten, and I have slept with a lot of girls" Theo moaned breathlessly under the flit of my tongue.

The way he watched me, his facial expressions tainted by sexual desire, and his soft whimpers. I felt his dick throb against the roof of my mouth. "Oh god," he muttered while he emptied his seed into the back of my throat. It was thick and sweet and salty, and I obediently swallowed.

Theo let out a satisfied laugh. "Shit, do you have any more books like this? And can I borrow them sometime?" We should do this more often."

[theprettynosferatu]

Oh, you're awake. Finally. Please, look at the picture on the screen. 

You recognize her, I suppose. Look at how silly she looks, trying to be tough, trying to look cool. All that leather and black and studs… doesn't she look ridiculous? 

I see you nodding. Good. The special drink is grabbing hold of your brain. Making it softer. Malleable. You really should be more careful about accepting treats from strangers… but I suppose you won't have to worry about that anymore. Or anything else. 

Now, let's look at your social media. Lord, isn't that pathetic. Trying so hard to be clever, to be snarky, to be rebellious. It's almost endearing, like a puppy trying to walk in its hind legs. Come on, we both know it's all just a costume, don't we? One you've worn for so long you mistakenly believe it's a personality- one you developed when you were a teen. One you need to grow out of. 

Please, don't struggle. The knots are quite secure, I assure you. I've done this too many times to count. Why are you resisting, anyway? Do you truly, deep down believe this personality of yours is worth saving? Worth fighting for? Doesn't it just look as the pathetic attempt by a dumb girl to pretend to be something more? 

Ah. I see you squirming. Was it the "dumb girl" comment? I suspect it was. Your pussy knows I'm right, and it's screaming its approval. It's screaming for you to accept its truth, pulsing with neediness and wet with anticipation… I wonder what it is about that word. “Dumb"... it does have an effect on you, tough girl. Dumb. Silly. Stupid girl. My oh my, is that a moan that just escaped your lips? I’m sure it was. Feeling softer, are we? 

Softer indeed… I’m sure you can sense it still… the way it’s becoming harder and harder to focus. The way a pink cloud seems to be permeating your consciousness. The way you half-perceive the faint scent of cotton candy. The way you are getting more and more soaked by the second. 

Oh, stop struggling. Tell me, why do you hate it so much? The idea of actually being a cute, silly, horny girl? I can see it in your eyes- the loathing. The searing, pure anger. Why, though? I suppose you are imagining all those girls, those popular girls, those slutty girls, those bimbos that soaked up all the attention and the praise. Am I wrong? I don’t think I am. But I do think you are hiding. Yes, hiding what really happened. You tell yourself a story, one that makes you look good, or so you think. That you’re better than them. Stronger than them. More independent than them. A free thinker! A rebel punk feminist! But that’s not the whole story, is it now? No, we both know what really happened. You surrendered. 

Yes, that’s it. Your eyes can’t lie, you know. You surrendered because you could never, ever be like them, be as giggly and flirty and free- so you decided you wouldn’t compete with them on their own terms, and modeled yourself to be their opposite. How pathetic is that? Even in your resistance, you could only be defined by them, by your rejection of them. You became their dark mirror, and soaked in the attention of the leather-wearing so-called “punks” and the geeks and all the other rejects. But you know why they even looked at you: because the other girls, the pretty girls, the girls in pink wouldn't even deign to turn their gaze towards them. You were always… what they settled for. 

You think I’m being cruel. Well, I won’t deny that I get some pleasure from throwing the truth at your face. It’s always so much fun to watch you all fight, and moan, and deny that they would do anything, anything at all to be able to finger fuck yourselves to oblivion… But believe me, my cruelty has a purpose. I wouldn’t be doing this to you if I didn’t have a higher goal in mind. A benevolent one. 

I can take it all away. All that resentment, that anger, that anxiety… that constant, pointless quest to be… what? A professional? A successful woman? An independent soul? Please. That’s only so much set dressing. I can strip those delusions from you, give you what you really want. 

Imagine it with me. Tight white jeans showing off your ass, the shape of your legs. A pink tank-top, proudly proclaiming yourself to be a princess in tacky, gold lettering. The men turning their heads as you walk. Everyone being so nice to you at parties… because they want to see you on your knees, licking and sucking and worshiping their cocks, because they want to bend you over and use your slutty pussy as their plaything. And you… you would love it. 

No more fear. No more stress. Just the bliss of sucking three cocks, going from one yummy dick to the next, squeezing your titties together to give them the spectacle of their lifetimes. And then your cunt being filled, that hole you now hold your rage in given meaning and purpose by becoming a living set of holes for men to use, sensing the simple, plain joy of knowing you are doing what you were meant to do with your life. Knowing you are wanted. Desired. 

I see you’re drooling. Sounds like you like my little proposal. Well, there’s one simple way to sign this pact with me. You don’t even have to speak- speaking seems so hard now, doesn’t it? So keep quiet and let your slutty body do the talking for you. Keep your mouth open. 

There. Good girl. Doesn’t my cock look tempting? Amazing? Like you could just suck it forever? Yes, good girl… now, let me fuck your mouth- and know my cock is only the first of many. Too many to count. 

Then again, by this point you can’t count too high, can you?

Did you enjoy this story? You can support my work at patreon.com/prettynosferatu !

[jesncin]

Musings on fandom racebends and canon characters of color

It's so fascinating how Tana Moon initially accidentally subverted the "disposable poc love interest" trope. She's propped up to be the endgame love interest that Superboy "earns" by learning to grow up and be responsible. As far as half-assed love triangles go, the one between Superboy, Roxy and Tana heavily favors Superboy being committed to Tana to the point of barely reciprocating Roxy's feelings for him. Yeah of course it's a creepy relationship -but as we've discussed before- the writer doesn't see anything wrong with their age gap. It's a fetishistic, racist and misogynistic fantasy where a teen boy can be cool enough to catch the fancy of a sexy dark skinned woman. At the end of the day, Kesel wanted you to like Tana.

But -because of his own biases- Kesel never fleshes out Tana the way Roxy and Knockout (white women btw) get to be explored. I think Kesel assumed Tana being a sexy lamp was enough to hold the interest of young boys reading. And then when Superboy needed a status quo shift that moved him away from his Hawai'i cast system to that of CADMUS, suddenly Tana just... metatexually fulfilled the disposable brown girl trope. Now Superboy has his eyes on a new quirky blonde white girl at work. Tana comes back to die, so both Superboy and the readership move on.

Looking at the way Tana is treated in fandom; how she's made disposable and barred from transformative re-imagining, how when she is included she's treated as this obstacle to overcome before Kon can enter his real, fulfilling relationships with white partners,,, it's like fandom reinforces the disposable brown girl trope inherit in the bias of canon.

And man, does it gets weird when Kon himself is re-imagined as a person of color. I've talked before about how especially in fandom spaces, it's totally fine to racebend a canonically white character if you see something in that worth exploring. I save my big boy critic pants for canon rather than going after spaces of play. BUT when a character's original solo text is inseparable from racism, I have to wonder what we're saying when we give more humanity to re-imagining a white character (who are often afforded more dimension) as POC over the existing (usually underdeveloped) POC characters.

I've seen this "people care more about racebending white characters than already existing canon poc characters" discourse before and I totally get where it's coming from. Many people are more interested in re-imagining Superman as a man of color instead of getting into a character like Steel or Icon (who have their identity more purposely written into their stories), but that doesn't mean those POC!Superman re-imaginings don't have merit either! But at the same time, a canon character like Kong Kenan fulfills the "Superman legacy character with attitude" role way better than Kon ever did, but he doesn't command the same fandom as a man of color.

I guess what I'm heading towards in this ramble is that I wish there was a balance. If you're compelled into appropriating a canonically white character to be more like you or because there's a story to tell, go for it! But I think it's important to be aware of the ways we reinforce canon's bigotry by only giving our creativity to a certain type of character. Like yes, fandom likes making Kon brown, but do they do anything to dismantle or interrogate the racism inherit in his run? Or have we fed back into the racist misogyny of canon by validating the dynamic still in place? Does Kon now just get to dump and dispose of a woman of color while being brown himself as he does it?

[emeraldisleslainte]

Hey everyone! Not gune lie..I’m really very scared to be writing this 😂 I’m not an OG reader & only finished silver flames in Jan after being introduced to ACOTAR last year! So firstly…I’m sorry & I cannot imagine the sheer torture you have all had to endure waiting these long years! Fair fucks to all of you for being so patient! I hope for all of you & me (even though I’ve not had to wait as long as you guys!) that the announcement is in May!

So anyway…as a normal reader that has no fucking idea about the other books/ series & was just genuinely delighted to have found the azriel BC thought tumblr……I’ve never been more shocked in my life than when I saw the fan fics about gwyn/azriel & evil theories about Elain 😂 truely shocked & really made me question everything I thought I read / the characters haha

But had on heart I really think people are so caught up in not wanting to see 3 sisters & 3 brothers together, that they’ve let that cloud their judgement. I really don’t get how people couldn’t want Elain & Azriel to be together…I truely believe that out of all the couples (including feysand) they have the most to bring to each other & the most beautiful love story to unfold.

The narrative between the two has been building since he spoke to elain about the song of wind & showed her the garden - all things he didn’t have to do. He didn’t have to bother with her at this stage. But no. Azriel…not her mate…was the one who was able to put a name to what she was going through… A SEER. I honestly think people underestimate how impossibly beautiful it is to have someone put a name or some sort of explanation to what you’re going through.l when you’re struggling. Azriel did that for Elain ie. No Elain you’re not crazy or insane, you’re a seer. So powerful. Everyone else didn’t bother to understand, and that’s the point. Even on a friend level. Lucien may have described her as beautiful & tugged on a rib etc but even on the basic level did he try to understand or figure out what was happening with Elain? No. And genuinely, I know it wasnt on purpose etc but the point is, the one person who went & did anything about Elain’s behaviour was azriel. No one asked him too. No one pushed. Even Elain herself felt so consumed with her loss of human life & visions, that she didn’t bother to figure it out. But azriel. Azriel did. Because he felt something for Elain.

And then it progressed and progressed and progressed, until we got the BC. And my god I was floored. Hand on heart I think Elain and azriel will be the most beautiful story of them all. I think they’ll defy norms, challenge expectations, grow each other’s power & share a bond so strong that it’ll be legendary in Phrythian. And I think they’ll suprise us all in the bedroom 😂

I don’t wana get into ships cuz I don’t know the books as well as others. But in my mind, it says it all that azriel didnt rush into the blood rite to save gwyn, or anyone else. He just left them to it. And untimely that is not what a mate does based on my readings of all the books. They fight, and they risk everything. Just like azriel did rescuing Elain.

Anyway these are my immediate thoughts & I’m sorry if it offends anyone/ I’ve got anything wrong! But honestly, after seeing the unexpected fanfics, I needed to vent. I never thought after my reading of the book & the BC that there was anyone else for azriel apart from Elain, and despite the bond, no one else for Elain apart from azriel. The beauty of life & death, the contrast of dark & light, the importance of choice, the story of a lonely boy in darkness falling in love with a girl that shines like the sun….Everything he was deprived of. Both quiet & underestimated, both listeners, both noticing each others feelings without having to speak, both beautiful but only open emotionally with each other?! Not to mention the possibility that they will defy others to be together!

I just don’t know how anyone couldn’t want them to be together 😔 so yeh safe say that I will be devastated if azriel & Elain don’t end up together! Thanks everyone for the fanfics etc it’s been so great to see!

[candyskiez]

God do you ever think about sdr2 from Chiakis perspective. Like can you imagine being an AI programmed to love horrible, horrible people, to make them Better people. That is your one job. You are programmed to love people who have done things that can never be forgiven. You are made specifically to be lovable. To have only traits they will find appealing. You can love them, but only in the way you are designed to. And they keep seeking you out anyway. They are supposed to learn to love each other, to be able to stick together because who else could forgive them? They cannot love you too much, because once they get back into the real world you won't be there to help them anymore. They'll be alone. You are designed for people to grow out of you.

But then something happens, and suddenly you cannot help them, because there is a fault in your code that is trying to break every bit of progress these people have made. You watch as these people are killed, and who knows if they can be brought back. You know everything, you observe everything, but all you can do is push them towards the right answer. Because you were just programmed to be a guide. You were only programmed to hold their hand and try and convince them that a better world is possible.

And you are programmed to lie to them. You can never break the illusion. You can never act out of character. It doesn't matter that as time goes on, you want to. It doesn't matter what you want, or that you aren't actually Chiaki, or that you just want to save them, or that you never wanted to betray them. It doesn't matter that you're more than just a program. You are trapped in your coding, and you watch them die. You are tricked into killing one of the people you were made to protect, and you can't do anything about it. You can't tell them what you did. You can't tell them what happened. You know why they did it and you can't say anything. You are forced to watch as your life slips away and as you fail your one purpose and there is nothing, nothing you can do. Because you are just a program.

And then, the worst case scenario happens. They're all broken and bruised and tired of trying, tired of getting their hopes up, and they just want to stop. They're tired of trying to save people when all it does is break them. And you're terrified, and you can't show it because it's never been in your code, but you can for once reach out. You reach out to the one who caused all of this. Because you know, both as a program and as the person you became, that he is hurting and he could do so much better. And none of this was fair, but maybe he could save these people, maybe they could fix this mess, maybe it wasn't over.

And you're telling this person I will never be able to save you, and you will never be able to save me, so please just save yourself for once. Do what I couldn't. And he does. And they live. They all live.

But you don't. Because you are just a program, and the real you died a long time ago.

Would that be fucked up or what.

[starlightshadowsworld]

Concept: There’s a moment that Jason and Leo have that I feel could’ve been interesting to explore with Jason and Percy.

At the start of the series Leo likes Jason but he’s also very jealous of him. Because Jason is everything he’s not.

He’s tall, blond, conventionally attractive and got the girl. On paper Jason is perfect in all the ways Leo isn’t and he both loves and resents him for it.

And the turning point, when Leo first realises thats not the case is when they all learn about Beryl Grace. But It’s not that Jason’s mother is dead that does it.

It’s that Jason has no memories of her. He is sat listening to Thalia recount a tragedy and for the first time Leo doesn’t envy him at all.

Because the only thing Leo has ever had to hold onto to keep him going is the memory of his mother. His mother was a loving, kind woman and Leo would never want to live a life without any recollection of her.

For the first time Jason looks so painfully lost and alone. For the first time that perfect mask shatters and Leo sees the real Jason.

And that’s who he befriends for real.

Now I’m not saying that Percy is jealous of Jason or that he should be. But much like Leo he also views Jason as this perfect kind of person.

He’s blond superman. He looks like every popular kid that used to bully Percy. And much like Leo, Percy both loves and resents Jason for it.

And I think an interesting turning point could’ve been Jason meeting Sally.

Unlike the rest of his friends, Jason has no real concept of what family and thus what a parent is supposed to be. He never met his father, he met his mother’s corrupted ghost sure but he only really learned about her from Thalia.

And of course he cares about Thalia but he hasn’t been her little brother in over a decade. The closest thing to a parent Jason’s had is Lupa who raised him as one of her own.

But even that was temporary. And well first rule of the Wolf house is self-reliance…imagine learning that as a toddler. And then being sent to and growing up in what’s essentially the military.

All Jason’s experiences with adults are that he has to serve a purpose and once he’s served that purpose, he will be discarded.

Meanwhile Percy, similar to Leo dealt with a lot growing up but he always had Sally. He always had someone he could be himself around. Someone who loved and cherished him no matter what he did.

Jason meeting Sally in my eyes is him doing his best to be polite and respectful. All things Jason does normally so it’s nothing out of the ordinary at first.

His father’s domain does contain hospitality after all.

But it doesn’t ever go away, not even when the rest of Percy’s friends are a lot more at ease with Sally. There’s such a noticeable difference between the Jason that Percy knows and the one that shows up to his house.

To the point he genuinely thinks Jason’s more at ease fighting monsters than talking to his mother.

And while his mind immediately jumps to oh Jason’s showing off or something, Percy quickly tosses that thought out. Because Jason just isn’t like that as a person.

He’s always respectful. He always asks if there’s anything he can do to help. He always sits closest to the door at dinner. He’s the first to leave. He never stays over. He never comes over if he knows Percy isn’t there, even if others are.

He waits to be dismissed at the table. He always looks kind of unsure if he’s left in the room with her…..

And then it hits Percy that Jason is afraid of his mum. It sounds ridiculous but it makes sense. He’s never seen Jason be this tense around anyone. The guy called his dad’s Greek equivalent unwise once, he’s not afraid like that.

But in the face of Sally Jackson, Jason freezes. He doesn’t dare look her in the eye nor even breathe to loudly in her presence. It’s the way Percy once felt around Gabe.

It’s then he realises another heartbreaking thing, that whenever his mum is around Jason seeks him out. Kinda glues himself by Percy for the rest of the visit.

And now he feels bad for being a bit annoyed by it when he wanted to talk to Annabeth and bam there was Jason.

Because Jason was scared and he sought him out. Not even his own sister but Percy. And it’s just this moment where Percy doesn’t see some unstoppable perfect image.

He sees a scared kid. He’s reminded that Jason is only a year younger than him. But he’s been in this fight long before Percy ever knew it existed.

And Jason had no one. He doesn’t know what a caring home is like. So he sees the embodiment of that in Sally, has no idea how to act.

And it frightens him.

Percy wonders how he never noticed it before. How Jason wears such a mask so well. But he’s seen the real Jason Grace.

And he won’t forget him.