#imagine going around talking to random people just to prove that you know their language

[layraket]

duo beating me up because i didn't say good morning in gerudo property

i had fun doing the desing, he would be around teaching people the other races language just to make things easier for them

[stvrnioloslvt]

quiet - Chris Sturniolo

fratboy!chris × jealous!reader

(dividers from @animatedglittergraphics-n-more)

disclaimer: the following content is not suitable for an underage audience. please, if you are a minor do not interact in any way or form. thank you. check the trigger warning before reading, enjoy!

t.w: inappropriate language, unprotected sex (don't), a tiny bit of degrading language, jealousy, alcohol, I think nothing more.

a.n: soo...i'm impatient. i had planned to post this story on the 31st, once the poll ended, but i really don't like to wait that much. however, the results are clear: chris smut won with the 52.9%!

when you spot your boyfriend chris flirting with another girl at the Halloween party, you decide to take the matter in your hands and make him jealous thanks to matt. what you don't know, is that chris is keeping a close eye on you.

“i really don’t wanna go to this stupid party, nick.”

“i know, but you know what?” nick put his hands on my shoulders, a gentle yet firm grip. he looked at me in the eyes, then said “at least you look hot as fuck, and that’s all that matters. walk through those doors as if your pussy is made out of gold, and see what happens.”

i smiled at my best friend. with new-found confidence, i walked towards the doors, swaying my hips in my skimpy DCC cheerleaders white shorts that left nothing to the imagination. nick followed right through, adjusting the fake fangs in his mouth. he was one hell of a hot vampire. 

as we entered the halloween-decorated fraternity of our college, we were immediately pulled aside by matt, who was waiting for us right at the entrance. blue and purple lights caressed his face, creating weird shadows all around.

“fuckin’ finally! what took you so long?”

“are your eyes actually open? don’t you see how hot we both look? good things are always the last to arrive.” i chuckled as nick pulled me in a side hug to prove a point to his brother.

i eyed matt up and down one last time. even in the weird colored lights, i noticed that something was off. “wait, why aren’t you dressed up?” 

“cause i’m getting the fuck out of here, i was waiting for you two just because i don’t want to leave chris here under the influence without one of us to check on him.”

“he’s already drunk?”

“yeah, you surprised?”

i looked around, trying to find that dumb-fuck, with no luck. 

“c’mon, let’s get the party started!” nick grabbed my hand, pushing through the crowd of sweaty and dressed up people to get us to the drinks.

“do you want to drink anything?” he screamed loud enough for me to understand him over the blasting music. i shook my head, still trying to find chris. i picked at my skin, worry eating me alive: where the fuck was he? he was drunk, what if he did something stupid, or worse, dangerous?

then, i spotted him: hidden in the corner of the room with some random girl, running his hand through his hair held back by the headband of his basketball player costume. she was talking about something, and i could see clearly the strand of blonde hair that he was playing with twirling in his hand as he leaned on the wall, with the cocky grin of someone who believes that he has the world at his feet.

i felt a wave of nausea hit me, hands shaking by my sides. 

nick followed my gaze, spotting his brother. his hand stopped midway, the red cup never reaching his lips. “no way…” he whispered. weirdly enough, i heard that. 

just as i was ready to leave everything and get the fuck out of there, nick stopped me.

“let me go, nick, i don’t want to spend another second here.”

“absolutely not.”

“nick, please.” tears pricked at my eyes, making it hard for me to keep them back.

“i can bet you a hundred bucks right now that he’s trying to work you up. two can play that stupid game, y/n, and you've got plenty of people who've been eyeing you up and down since we arrived. go out there and get him back."

i took a napkin, drying my tears before they could fall and ruin my makeup.

an idea popped up in my mind. i turned towards the door, spotting matt, ready to leave.

"nick, quick, how mean would it be if i took revenge with matt?"

"honestly? a lot", he begun, pulling out his phone, dialling matt's number. "but you know what? i support women's rights as well as women's wrongs. go do your thing, baby."

we watched as matt picked up the phone, turning towards us. nick told him to come to us before he left, and so he did.

"matt, go and dance with y/n. don't ask questions, we'll explain everything later."

matt looked at me with a puzzled look on his face, but he didn't complain when i pulled him through the crowd, right in the middle of the room.

"i'm sorry, matt, just a little payback to your dumb brother."

i briefly explained to him what happened, what we saw, and nick's idea, so that he knew what was actually happening.

"you know what? i need a tiny bit of alcohol in me, then we can truly give chris payback."

i watched as one of his friends brought him a red cup. he gulped it down, waiting for the alcohol to hit.

and when it did, we had the best night ever: we laughed, danced, twirled together. soon enough, everyone's eyes were on us, some were judging, others having fun with us. at a certain point i might have drunk something too, cause i found myself grinding against matt. and god knows how private we actually are around each other in our daily life.

i felt matt's hands travelling up my sides, pushing his hips against mine, making me feel his erection. i threw my head back against his shoulder as he placed wet kisses down my neck, hands squeezing me closer to him. soft breaths came out of my parted lips, losing myself in the moment: maybe it was the alcohol, or the music, or the knowledge that everyone does some dumb shit during halloween night and then act the next day like nothing happened, but i had a strong urge to grab him and kiss him, to feel his lips dance on mine, our bodies so close one another that they physically couldn't get closer.

just as i turned around, intoxicated enough to actually kiss him, a strong hand pulled me away from my friend.

"wha-" i turned around, welcomed by the sight of a pissed off chris: jaw clenched, eyes fixed on a spot in front of him, dragging me around the room, elbowing whoever dared to step in front of him.

i tried to free myself from his grip, pulling and tugging with all my might, but he didn't even bulge a tiny bit. "where the fuck do you think you are taking me-"

"quiet."

"chris i swear-"

"shut the fuck up," he growled. he dragged me up the stairs, stopping in front of a door. he opened it and pushed me inside.

he locked the door behind me, pushing me against it. his lips immediately found mine, kissing me roughly. it was an angry kiss, a forceful one. it was screaming vendetta, jealousy, hurt.

i tugged at his hair as his tongue made its way in my mouth. his hands gripped my hips, so hard that i was sure they would leave marks. he hooked his hand under my knee, pushing my leg up and around his waist. i tiptoed with the other leg, trying to gain a bit of height.

chris pressed his erection right against my pussy, grinding slightly to tease me.

"chris," i moaned, every little noise swallowed by his lips.

"such a whore," he growled, lifting me up. both my legs wrapped around his waist to steady myself, as my back hit the door behind me. from this new position, i could feel his tip pushing right at my entrance.

"you really had to go all out and fuck my brother, didn't you? such a needy slut."

"the only slut here is you, flirting with that little friend of yours."

he snorted, clearly pissed off at my comeback.

"you really have no idea of what is coming, ma."

chills ran down my spine at that threat, at his dark voice and blown out pupils. he had the look of someone ready to eat you alive, and that was probably his intent.

"how pathetic," he mumbled before ripping apart the tight fabric of my shorts, leaving me completely bare.

i gasped, trying to pull away. "my shorts!"

"oh please," he started, "they were covering nothing. you could walk out there like this and no one would notice the difference."

he pressed me harder against the door as he pulled down his pants, just enough for his dick to spring out.

"hope matt got you wet enough," he chuckled ironically, then pushed himself right in, to the brim.

a chocked out moan left my lips, as chris started thrusting fast and hard inside me.

"oh chris- fuck."

"yeah? feels good? bet matt couldn't fuck you like i do."

i threw my head against the door while i clawed at his back, his jersey stopping me from leaving marks all over his back.

"ngh- so big, chris...please," i whimpered, trying to adjust to his size and rhythm. chris's lips attached to my neck, leaving kisses all around. as his mouth travelled down to my cleavage, he started to bite and nip at my skin, making sure that it would bruise.

"fuck-," he pulled out, quickly putting me down and bending me over the desk right by the door. whose room was that, again?

he pushed himself right in again, gripping my hips. he pounded into me so hard that the desk was banging against the wall with every thrust.

the room filled with the sound of our bodies slapping together, moans and groans as the music resonated faintly.

"such- a whore, fuck!" i felt him shudder; his hand flew quickly at the base of his cock, squeezing slightly to prevent himself from cumming yet.

"you're fuckin'mine, got that? mine."

one hand grabbed my asscheek, slapping it right after. and then again, and again, until i was left trembling and crying, overstimulated from the pleasure and pain that he was inflicting me.

his thrusts grew sloppy and unsteady as he approached his release. "chris, please, please, i wanna cum so bad" i sniffled, gripping the desk until my knuckles turned white to ground myself.

"no."

"please-"

"you can hold it. you're not cumming until i tell you to."

i bit my hand lightly, trying to focus on his orders. but it was just so hard, and he was fucking me just so good, hitting that sweet spot over and over again, that i knew i couldn't last for much longer.

a low guttural moan escaped from chris's lips as my walls clenched around him hard, pushing both of us even closer to our orgasms.

with a particular deep thrust, he tipped over the edge, spilling inside me, filling me with his hot cum. he groaned relieved as he thrusted slow and soft inside me, riding the waves of his climax.

i screamed, unable to contain my orgasm anymore, shaking as i came down from my high. i whimpered, laying down on the desk, the cool wood making me shiver all around.

"good job, ma," he whispered, stroking my back and kissing my shoulder. "such a good girl f'me, hm?"

his arms wrapped around my waist, helping me up. i leaned into him, grabbing his jersey for support.

"was i too rough?" i shook my head, leaning back to look at him in the eyes. a question bursted out, unable to stay put anymore.

"who was that girl?" chris looked taken back by the sudden question, but he had no problem answering. he shrugged, "i have no idea, i just wanted to work you up. you always give your best with angry sex."

i looked at him flabbergasted, ready to actually pick up a fight. "chris i swear-"

"shush mamas, let's get you something to actually cover up, hm? don't wanna go out there covered in marks and with no pants on, right?"

「 ★ ★ ★ 」

yk what i should fly to the USA just to experience Halloween the American way, that shit seems so much fun i swear.

hope you enjoyed it! happy, spooky Halloween everyone!

love y'all,

-bree🎃🦇

MASTERLIST

[sailing-ever-west]

had a nonverbal episode yesterday and naturally am coping with autistic blorbos so it got me thinking about nonverbal Luffy and how that would affect the plot, especially with a character who is typically, well, yelling all the time.

like canon Luffy can't really keep his mouth shut and this causes many problems but I fully believe that he would be able to wreak just as much havoc if not more without ever talking.

him using sign language is super cool for a starting place, but

1. I'm honestly not sure who would've taught it to him because he didn't have a consistent education or guardian so what he knows is probably somewhat incomplete/rudimentary. Garp would've made a solid attempt I think but he probably would've tried to do it in like a strict lesson format and Luffy's brain would just ADHD straight outta there, but I think he still learned the basics.

2. Signing wouldn't always work to communicate because not everyone knows it so he would still often have to find other ways to get across what he's saying. The crew would learn sign and just get used to his various other ways of communicating but people all over the world when they're traveling can't be counted on to know stuff.

Random ideas I have

keeping a little flag with a jolly roger on it in his pocket and just pointing to it to tell people he's a pirate

just not bothering to try to communicate with people who have oficially pissed him off. sorry loser your privileges have been revoked I'm just gonna punch you now

marines getting really annoyed at first because they think he's staying silent to snub them and then realizing he just can't talk but by the time they figure that out he's already down to fight them anyway

stretching his arms into shapes of things to get an idea across

quickly drawing illustrations (not terribly helpful because he's awful at it, but he continues to do it anyway)

Zoro/someone else on the crew explaining things to a new person and Luffy just nodding proudly like yep that's my crewmate they get it :))

still makes Noises. nonverbal =/= quiet and boy does Luffy prove that

He used to sign "food" at Sanji but eventually he just Shows Up in the kitchen or approaches him with big eyes and Sanji knows what he wants

there's a rumor going around that he communicates with his crew telepathically because people cannot figure out HOW the ideas are getting across

asks people to join his crew by just showing them the little flag and motioning to follow him. once you come with him there's no going back he's like ok you're my best friend forever and within like 24 hours you're like well I guess I'm on a pirate crew

doesn't say gum gum when he does a move he just starts screaming. it's like far more terrifying and villains have no idea what's happening until they're being punched in the face by a nonverbal teenager in flip flops

basically take how abrupt and confusing Luffy already is to everyone else in the world and then imagine he doesn't announce anything before doing it

Thinking of doing some little fics or mini comics of major scenes in this AU idk

[cursed-mars-bars]

Having him be Adonis and her as Aphrodite where he is usually the one described as god-like sets up the mood of the story.

I have to applaud his confidence, in asking a practical stranger to draw her, and her even more so for agreeing so nonchalantly.

Love the small detail that she doesn’t even smoke was the very thing that fated them into the meeting.

He never answered her now he was able to find her – and she left such an impression on him that he actively sought her out.

‘most men are looking for someone to fool around with…he

looks like he wanted to make a fool out of you.’ This was such a clever sentence.

He wasn’t kidding about dying to draw her, yet I didn’t realize that he would be so impatient to do it at a random café instead of his studio with proper supplies, etc.

I don’t blame her for being weary of him; he may be a beautiful stranger, but still a stranger. At least now she knows that he is a beautiful stranger that can draw.

Persistence is one way to describe him.

‘it’s still afternoon so I can’t buy you dinner, yet.’

Yes, because that’s the problem here, not that he asked her to draw her, naked, in his studio which also serves as his home.

I can imagine that his intense stare analysing any part of you can ignite some sort of emotion, even if it had been purely professional.

I like how she associates his private living space with a part of his life and himself that not everyone sees.

Him making her feel like a piece of art to be appreciated and worshipped gives a deeper level of sensuality.

I agree with her that sex where you become aware and appreciate being close to one another just leads to another level of intimacy.

The whole scene is sensual and very much screams him as a character with how he treated her and the experience as a whole.

I appreciate her mindset when he at first doesn’t contact her after their night together – it was a great time but no prior commitments were discussed therefore no one owes the other something so no use in getting hung up on it – a very mature approach.

The repeating of their first meeting outside the club was cute.

‘it’ll be an honor to be stuck in your maze.’ That’s probably the most interesting way that I’ve heard someone describe being in a relationship with someone. It fits him though.

The fact that he counted down the minute that he had let her escape to go to the bathroom – the man has a sense of humour.

He has his own exhibit in an art museum – impressive.

The irony that she is a florist's daughter, understands the language of flowers, and yet has never received them as a message?

Skinship is attractive on another level, even when nothing sexual occurs.

The way in which she describes their separation is a reminder of reality, that her life outside his studio lacks colour.

‘A dangerous yet delightful habit.’ Dangerous because of what it could lead to, or dangerous because of how painful it would be if it ended?

‘Did you just use me?’ Just a pit stop, love.

His desire is to draw every inch of her because he sees her as a divine being.

He is such a peculiar character and it’s fascinating, he throws paint on each of them while in the shower instead of just speaking to her about her not leaving.

Is there symbolism in the colours used?

I understand her fears of loving him, from what has been shown, he loves deeper than most people, and it’s almost impossible to not run out of this infatuation at one stage or another, and then he’ll be seeking out a new love to consume him.

At least he wants to proudly show her off to the public and introduce her to his mutual.

It’s interesting how his former muse pretty much proves her worst fears.

‘There’s no use stressing about things that haven’t happened yet.’ He may be talking about her exams, but its double meaning is almost like a warning to when he eventually hurts her, to deal with the pain when it happens but enjoy the calm before the storm.

He brought her flowers – being the first to do so.

Him starting to his disappearance act is the start of a spiral of emotions, for her and the readers.

Is it the stress of the deadline of his art that is causing him to seek out other muse or is there something else?

If he had just spoken to her about the emotions that he was feeling, and where he was going during his absence, her reaction to the other woman at his show might have not been so drastic. Did he really not think that he was doing anything wrong or did he really not care – why bring your new muse to your show where you know your partner will there be too? If it doesn’t mean anything, he should have mentioned the woman who was featured in some of his pieces.

‘I thought you understand me.’ How was she meant to when there was no open communication between them?

That ending – I don’t know how to feel, and I mean that in the best possible way. Did she misunderstand his intentions with the other muse?

‘He tastes so bitter yet so sweet.’

This piece had me feeling so many things. Much like their relationships so many uncertainties.

VENUS.

Hyunjin x reader. (s,f,a)

Author's not: Happy birthday to the most beautiful boy, Hwang Hyunjin!

Adonis.

That's what comes to your mind when you see him.

Adonis as in that one mortal, who is so beautiful even, the goddess of love herself, Aphrodite, fell in love with him.

And he is so beautiful, so painfully beautiful that you can't look away. A long nose, small eyes, pointy chin, and lips as red and as luscious as the forbidden apple that entices you to take a sinful bite.

"You need a lighter?" He asks.

The neon sign above you illuminate his face with a reddish glow adds a mystical aura to his appearance.

You stand there leaning against the bricked wall with an unlit cigarette dangling between your teeth, mouth slightly parted and unable to speak.

You stifle a nod instead.

He pulls a lighter out of his jacket and flicks it on in a second until a flame forms, then light the end of your cigarette as you take a drag.

You exhale and take the cigarette off your mouth, when the smoke disappears, you see him smiling at you.

"You have beautiful hands," he says while looking at your hand with the cigarette stuck between your middle and index finger.

No one ever praises your hands before, and you never paid any attention to them either, you just think of them as hands, nothing special about them.

A group of people comes out of the back entrance and starts talking, replacing the silence with their loud chatters.

He steps close enough to stand next to you and leans close to your ear.

"Can I draw you?" He asks.

You stifle a laugh, thinking if this is what people say when they try to flirt with someone nowadays? You get skeptical if that's his intention with you, plus, the request is so strange. Why draw you? Why did he choose you of all people?

Your curiosity kicks in and tells you to say yes.

"Yeah, sure," you answered.

He takes a step away, put his hand in one of his jacket pockets, and pulls out a pen, he tugs the cap between his teeth.

He grabs your other hand, and you get startled at how cold his hand is, he holds it up with the back of your hand facing up.

He writes something on the skin, the needle of the pen is sharp, it is one of those drawing pens with a pointy end, glad you can tolerate the pain by looking at how attractive he looks with a pen cap tugged between his teeth that you can see the faint mole on under his left eye.

Once he finishes writing, he caps the pen back then lets go of your hand.

"That's the address of my studio," he says.

You look down at his writing on your skin, even his handwriting is beautiful, thin cursive letters in black ink, the curl of the letters mimics his smile.

Then there is his name at the bottom, Hyunjin.

"Come whenever you can," he adds, then shoves the pen back into the back pocket of his jeans this time.

"Okay," you replied even though you were too busy admiring his penmanship than learning his address.

"Okay," he said back to you.

He walks backward, stepping away from the glow of the neon sign with a small smile dancing on his face, "I'll see you," he says.

"See you," you muttered to him.

You watch him walk away until his figure disappears, engulfed by the dark of the night.

You toss the unfinished cigarette smoke onto the concrete floor and step on it, you don't smoke at all, you are merely using the cigarette as an excuse to get out of the stuffy club.

And you're glad you did, because who would have thought you'll meet such an attractive man.

-

A week later, after class, you are surprised to see him again, standing outside your campus building, standing with his back against the tree at the park of the campus with his hands deep in his jeans pockets.

He stands up when he spots you walking out of the entrance of the building, he doesn't hesitate to walk up to you.

"I'm sorry that I'm impatient," he begins speaking, staying a foot away from you, "but I need to know if I can draw you," he finishes.

You look around and see that everyone glances in your direction, it is either because everyone knows everyone in here, or that Hyunjin is not fitting to be considered as a law student. You look at his faded jeans and a flannel shirt with a black t-shirt underneath, he stands out but you think it's because he is gorgeous.

But your head is filled with one big question at that time:

"How do you find me?"

He licks his lips, they are in a shade of pink under the sunlight, like the color of the cherry blossom.

"It's not hard to find you," he says.

You tip your head to the side with a questioning look on your face.

You take him to one of the coffee shops near campus and buy him a cup of hot coffee, he is more excited for the napkin though, which he immediately grabs at it.

"Can I borrow your pen?" He asks.

You rummage through your bag and pull out a pen, hand it to him on the table. He uncaps the pen and starts drawing on the napkin.

Your eyes look down at his hands, at the prominent veins on the back of his hands, the slender fingers decorated with rings, a chain bracelet dangles on his slim wrist and swaying along with every stroke of the pen on the napkin.

Mesmerized by the way his hand gripped the pen and the other hand splayed on the table, you don't hear his question until he asks again.

"Pardon?" You asked him.

"You're a law student?" He asks without looking up.

His voice was soft and light, almost melodic.

"Yes," you answered.

"Are you going to be a lawyer?"

You clear your throat and shake your head to stop ogling at him, "Uhm... yes," you replied.

A small smile blooms on his face, "how sexy!"

You blink a few times, afraid to respond to his exclamation, afraid that you misheard him. Did he just say sexy?

"Fight injustice, defend helpless people, arguing in court in black suits," he continues, "That's so sexy to me," then shots you a glance before looking back down at his doodle on the napkin.

You awkwardly smile at him, still unsure how to properly respond to his indirect praise.

You quickly come up with something to say, suddenly remember why you take him for coffee.

"So, how do you find me?"

"Not that hard to find you," he replies, eyes glancing up at you for a few seconds then back onto his doodle.

"That doesn't explain a lot," you said to him.

He stops scribbling and looks up at you, "not that hard to find a beautiful girl like you,"

"Convincing!" You scoff.

It's kind of annoying how you can't easily read his intention towards you, most men are looking for someone to fool around with, but he doesn't look like one, he looks like he wanted to make a fool out of you.

He leans in again and continues scribbling on the napkin, "I met one of your friends, the one you came with to the club and asked her about you,"

Now you get it how he knows, he should have said it sooner.

"Are you afraid that I stalked you or something?"

He's way too good-looking to stalk a nobody like you, plus, you don't have an exciting life worth stalking for, to begin with.

"Because I don't have beautiful hands, they're just... hands," you said to him, then take a sip of your coffee.

He slides his drawing at you on the table then clasp his hands together on the table.

You are wrong for saying it's a doodle, a doodle is a mindless drawing you do when you're bored, but this, this is a real drawing, a drawing of your face.

The drawing would look even more beautiful on a proper sketch paper, or even better, a canvas.

"Oh wow, this is..." you trail your words, it's so good that you can't find the words to finish your sentence.

"This is so great," you finished, but great is still an understatement, it is wondrous, amazing, beyond.

He leans forward on the table, so close that you can see the tiny mole under his left eye even under the afternoon sun.

"Is that enough to make you believe that I'm an adequate artist to draw you?" he asks with one eyebrow raised.

He recognizes why you put your guard up high, that is normal to him, and that maybe his request shocked you.

You realize that you might have offended him for not trusting his skill, but it isn't about that, it's just the way he approaches you in a peculiar way that makes you alerted, put your guards up high.

"I'm sorry, I didn’t mean to offend you in any way,"

"I know, it's alright. It's not the first time," he assured you with a smile.

Oh, so he did it before, you said in your head.

"Why didn't you come to my studio?"

"I lost the address," you show him the erased address he wrote on the back of your hand, but you actually saved the address in your phone but decided not to come.

He nods in acknowledgment, reclines on his seat, takes a long look at you.

"Why don't you come with me to my studio now?" He invites.

He is so bold, daring like everything he does overflows with confidence, there's no hesitancy in them.

"I can't, I have another class," you replied, reminds you to check the time if you have enough time to walk to your next time, "and by the way, I have to go,"

You gather your things from the table, and he hands you your pen back along with his drawing on the napkin, "I'll come to your studio," you promise him, then get up from your chair.

"I write the address on the napkin so you have no excuse to not come to my studio," he says as he takes the first sip of his coffee.

Gosh, he's so persistent.

"I will come to your studio," you convince him then leave for the door.

-

You keep your promise.

You come the next day on a Saturday afternoon, climbing the stairs that led to his studio because there is no elevator.

You knock on his door, it takes a moment for him to finally open the door. His hair is tied into a low bun with a few loose strands curtained his face, and he's wearing a sleeveless black top with dark jeans.

"I came," you said to him as he stands there in the doorway, looking at you with a hand holding the door open.

He shots you a smile, then steps away from the door, "come in!" He says with a hand gesture to let you into the house.

You don't expect his studio is also where he lives, and sleeps.

The spacious room is divided into two big rooms, the first half which is also the bigger half of it in the studio and a kitchenette pushed to one side of the wall near the front door and the other half is his bedroom and probably a bathroom or something, you can't look inside.

As you wait for him to get you a drink, you look around his studio, stacks of canvases on one side of the wall, a wooden table filled with art supplies, from brushes to cans of paint, and the floor is tainted with drops of paint.

You walk to the window, a large window that takes the most portion of the wall with a view that overlooks the city.

You hear the sound of a camera shutter and turn around to see him taking a picture of you with a camera.

He slowly put down the camera from covering his face, "I'm sorry, I can't help it," he says.

He puts down the camera on the table and walks up to you, holds out a can of drink at you.

You take a sip of the fruity drink that surprisingly refreshes you, "you live here," you said to him.

"I do everything here," he says back, also taking a sip of his canned drink.

"So, how are you going to draw me?" You asked him, putting down your canned drink on the nearby table and saunter to the collection of his paintings on the other side of the wall, bending down to observe each one.

You look over your shoulder, "you just need to draw my hands, right?"

"Actually," he puts down his drink and comes up to you, "I have something to ask from you,"

"What's that?"

"Is it okay if I draw you naked?" He asks you.

You chuckle at him, that's two strange requests from him already.

"Not fully naked," he quickly adds, "just half-naked,"

You lean against the shelf of his art supplies, "without buying me dinner first?" You joked.

He softly laughs and brushes his hair to the back, "it's still afternoon so I can't buy you dinner, yet,"

"That's fair!" you beamed.

He waits for your answer, crossing his arms together and eyes staring at you with his mouth slightly parted open.

You've never done this before, modeling for something especially naked, but you like the rush that comes from it.

You stare back at him and say, "okay,"

Hyunjin drags a single sofa from his bedroom and positions it on one side of the room, slightly facing the window.

He turns around and sees you unbuttoning your blouse with your back facing him, he watches as the piece of clothing slides down your arms and you place it on the sofa.

He would love to help you unclasp your bra as you reach to your back to do it yourself, but he relents and walks to take his drawing equipment.

"Do I sit here?" You asked him as you make your way to the single sofa he put in the corner of the room.

"Yes," he answers.

Hyunjin returns with a sketchbook and clutches a case filled with various drawings pencils and pens then sit on a stool just a few feet from you.

"Do you want me to do a certain pose?" You asked him, you get confused about what to do with your hands.

"Just sit comfortably," he says as he flips open his sketching book.

You decide to put your legs up and fold them on the sofa and sit facing him, "Is this okay?"

When he glances up, Hyunjin has to stop sharpening his pencil for a moment to look at you, sitting half-naked on the sofa, your skin glows under the sunlight that shines through the window.

He walks up to you and stops right in front of you, his hand reaches for your hair and puts them behind your ear, then puts the rest of your hair to the back of your shoulders, preventing it from covering your chest.

You look up through your lashes when his hand stops at the side of your face.

He holds his breath, trying to fight the urge to not touch you further, and quickly walks back to his stool.

"Just tell me if you need anything," he says.

"Sure," you affirmed.

The room gets quiet as he starts drawing that all you can hear is the strokes of his pencil against the paper and your low intake of breath as you calm yourself down.

You don't know what causes your heart to beat this fast, it is probably from the way he takes a look at you, he would look up and stare at you for a few seconds before glancing down at his eyes.

The intensity of his stares mixes with how gorgeous he looks when he's fully concentrating, is a dangerous treat.

From the strands of hair falling on his face, a crease between his eyebrows, or the way his fingers wrapped around the pencil as it dances on the paper, then there's the occasional small smiles playing on his face when he looks at you.

"Have you drawn anyone before me?" You asked him.

"Yes,"

"Did you also tell them to take their clothes off when you first met them?" You poked fun at him with a low chuckle.

Hyunjin smiles, "Not technically,"

"Why me?" You asked him, you've been wanting to ask him this since that day he visited your campus.

Hyunjin stops drawing and looks up at you, "I think you're beautiful,"

It's a cliché answer, but you give him a chance to deliver his reason to backs up his answer

"You captivate me," he adds.

"From the first time I set my eyes on you, I just know I have to draw you,"

Your heart that was beating out of its chest a few seconds ago, and just now skips a beat when you listen to his sincere answer, makes you wonder if you were as beautiful as he thinks you are.

"To be honest, I'm not really sure if I can draw you," he says as he picks up his pencil.

"Why?"

"I'm afraid that I can't do justice with my drawing," he said.

"That the drawing will look much prettier than me?" You teased.

He lightly shakes his head, "it's the other way around,"

It's easy to spot someone when they're being phony, but as you keep looking at him and into his eyes, you can prove that he is not one.

You stare into each other’s eyes for a while now, communicating through the silence until the sunlight dims as the day is about to be replaced by the night.

Hyunjin puts his drawing away and walks up to you, he looks down at you for a while, and a hand reaches for something behind you.

"I think it's enough for today," he announces, then wraps your body with a blanket.

You put the blanket around your body and clutch it together, "is it done?"

"No, not yet," he replies.

He put his stool away, carries his sketchbook and drawing equipment away then heads to the kitchen, "can you stay a little longer?"

You walk up to the pile of clothes on the sofa and begin to put it on again.

"Why?" You asked without looking at him as you fumble to clasp your bra.

"I'm going to buy you dinner," he said.

You laugh at his way of keeping up his promise, "of course,"

You just don't know that Hyunjin also wanted to keep you here longer than he wanted to.

After dinner, Hyunjin opens a bottle of wine and fills two glasses with the crimson red liquid, the aphrodisiac smell wafting around the room.

You sit next to each other on the sofa, taking sips of your wine and eating fruit slices that he skillfully peeled and sliced earlier, then put it on a wooden board in a rather pleasing look.

He treats everything like a piece of art.

"How long have you been doing this?" You asked, leaning forward with a hand under your chin and prop on your knee, admiring the paintings hung on the wall across from you.

"Three years now," he replies.

"Has this always been your dream?" You asked again, put your wine glass down on the table, then turn your head at him.

Hyunjin never had this question asked to him before.

It takes him a moment to get an answer out of his head, "It's just happened," he honestly answers.

"I never thought of being one before. I just started drawing one day and I like it. And I want to keep doing it, until now!" he explains.

"Then what about tomorrow?" You half-heartedly asked.

He sees how your hand splayed on your jaw, and he gets the urge to hold your face, "to be honest, I don't know," he says.

"But that's so exciting, isn't it?"

He puts down his wine glass, "not knowing what tomorrow brings,"

You bite your ring finger between your teeth as you process his answer in your head.

He reaches for your hand on your lap, "May I?"

You nodded at him, permitting him to touch your hand.

He holds it up and observes it like your hand is a treasure that has been kept underground for centuries.

He compares your hand size with him, and you almost laugh at how his hand could engulf your hand in his, or maybe it's the alcohol you consumed that makes you loosen up around him.

Hyunjin slips his fingers in your hands next, then sighs.

"So perfect," he murmurs with his eyes looking at how perfectly his fingers fit in the spaces between your fingers.

When you think he would stop the moment he unclasps his hand from yours, he brings your hand close to his mouth, he holds it up and what he does next is unexpected.

He kisses your fingertips, one by one, with his eyes closed and mouth slightly parted open that you can feel his warm breath.

It never crosses your mind that you would feel his plush lips under your touch, and he kisses the inside of your hand next, "so beautiful," he beams with a sweet smile then place your hand on one side of his face.

He is so, so beautiful, and it hurts.

You close your eyes because he keeps drawing you in the longer you look, but then he kisses you, so softly then all at once.

You sigh because it feels like he satisfied the thirst you never knew you had, and his kisses are so sweet, intoxicating, like the wine you had earlier.

He holds your face like he wanted to do, and he regrets not doing it sooner, holds your face like you are a fragile piece of glass that could break if he holds it too hard.

"Let me have you," he breathlessly says against your lips.

You are not sure what he meant by that, whether he just wants you to satisfy his desire, or he wants to really have you.

You are sure it is the former, and for now, you are willing to give him that.

You let him hold you, kisses you deeper and harder, sucking the air out of your lungs until it burns and your head gets dizzy from the lack of oxygen.

You pull away just enough to catch a breath, and he slides his mouth down to your throat, you tilt your head up to allow him to place small kisses on the skin.

You slip your hand into his dark locks, silky and smooth, exactly like you have imagined in your head.

"Come with me," he whispers into your ear.

He withdraws himself off you, then gets up, holds out his hand out at you.

This feels like one of those moments where your choice would shape out your whole life, you look up at him, wide-eyed and slightly dazed.

You look at his face, then at his hand, tirelessly waiting for you to take it.

You take a look at his eyes once again, looking at you with a wistful gaze, then take his hand.

A hand that pulls you to step into another part of his life, a secluded one that he doesn't just share with anyone and lets you in.

His bed is unmade with the duvet making a pile on the center of it, you softly smile at him.

"This isn't part of your plan?" You joked.

"I didn't think you would really come," he responds.

You exchange a glance at him, and he grabs your hand, pulls you close against his body so he can kiss you again.

You take each other’s clothes off until there is none left to cover your body, and he impatiently roams his hands around your body along, whimpering at how soft you feel under his touch.

He tosses the duvet to the side before gently laying you down on the bed, stands there at the end of the bed just staring at your stark naked body on the white sheet of his bed, your cheeks blushing with your thighs pressed shut.

He thinks of so many things he wants to do to you, first, he wants to feel you all over. He sits next to you on the bed, a hand runs down to touch every part of your body.

He replaces his hand with his mouth next, kisses every inch of your skin with his plump, red lips and the wet marks he left on the skin, burning with desire.

You are barely functioning, you just lay there as he kisses you down and takes every searing kiss with your eyes closed while trying not to fall apart underneath him.

No man ever made you feel this way, so admired and worshipped, and the way his eyes tenderly gazing at you, makes you feel less insecure and safe.

Once he has done making a long trail of kisses, you pull his face close by his neck to kiss him, properly kiss him as you would to your lover.

He is far from being your lover, but you're willing to risk mistaking him as one, just for this moment, only for the night.

"I want to feel all of you," he says to you.

"I'm on the pill," you informed him.

And with that being said, Hyunjin let his hands roam around your body, freely and greedily, with mouths latching with yours non-stop.

His hand goes to your gushing core, tracing your folds, and lightly runs his slender fingers down your slit, wetting them with your arousal.

You sigh into his mouth when he starts circling your clit with his thumb then applies gentle pressures on it, making you arch your back to seek more friction.

With a careful move, he inserts one finger inside you, and he deems it not enough, so he adds another digit, two fingers inside you now.

You moan and let go of his kiss, eyes flicking to where his two slim fingers going in and out of you.

Hyunjin also watches how his fingers disappeared inside you, and he curls them, finding your spot to send you close to your climax.

Your hand flies to his wrist and tries to stop him but failing, quickens the pace that makes your toes curl and digs into the mattress.

"Gosh, I can feel you clenching around my fingers," he murmurs, close to your ear.

You turn your head at him and let him see how good he makes you feel.

"So beautiful moaning like that," he praises.

Your hand reaches for his arm and claws the flesh as the knowledge inside you tightens, then crashes your mouth with his to moan out loud into his mouth as you climax.

He kisses you back, open-mouthed, slobbering, and hungrily, pins you under him in a few seconds. Now that he knew how tight you feel around his fingers, he can't wait to feel you around his cock.

He teases your sensitive core from your previous orgasm with the tip of his cock, and you squirm, a few low moans slip past your mouth.

You arch your back, ready to take all of him inside you.

Hyunjin kisses you once again and keeps his eyes on you as he begins slowly pushes his length inside you.

His focus is torn between watching how his cock is buried inside you little by little or watching your face with your jaws slacked open from the immense pleasure of being filled by him.

Hyunjin lets out the most beautiful moan you ever heard, like a melodic tune when he fully bottomed out, and you pull your knees up to let him penetrate deeper and earn a loud groan from him.

"Oh, I'm going to lost it," he groans again, "you feel so good," he lowers himself on top of you, his mouth seeking solace on the crook of your neck.

After a moment of collecting himself by kissing you, he begins moving, thrusting into you, all the while his eyes bore into you and not breaking the eye contact even for a mere second.

Your breasts jiggling along to the hard thrusts of his hips against you, this is just your preferred kind of sex where two individuals are enjoying being inside each other and truly present in the moment.

He caresses your cheek, "what are you thinking?"

"Nothing," you answered because there's nothing inside your head right now but how good he feels inside you.

You put your hand on his neck and look deep into his eyes, "I can't think when you're fucking me this good,"

He smiles at you, then sink his mouth on you again, devouring your lips with his slobbering kisses as he picks up the pace of his thrusts.

Hyunjin cums inside you right after you cum around him, and he holds you so tight as he places a kiss on your mouth.

And he tastes so, so sweet.

-

You don't expect him to contact you after you leave him early in the morning, and it's been almost a week now, if he is indeed looking for you, he would have already.

He got what he wants, either drawing you or having sex with you, he got both, therefore, he has nothing left he wanted to do with you.

Hoping he'd come and see you again will only be a waste of time, so you let it go. He's nice, good-looking, a talented artist, and the sex was good, you put the end right there and move on.

At the end of the week, your friends force you to come with them to the club because uni has been a pain in the ass, and you cave in.

You are never good at being in a crowd, the feeling of being surrounded by people makes you uneasy, and you don't bother of using a cigarette as an excuse this time, you just get up and leave for the emergency stairs that lead you to the rooftop.

There are a few people in there, smoking and chatting, probably avoiding the crowd as well. You head to the corner and lean forward against the concrete barrier that lets you overlook the city, it feels nice when you feel the night spring air brushes your face, enveloping you in a warm invisible embrace.

"You need a lighter?" A voice asks.

You turn around to see him, standing just a few feet away with his hands deep in his jeans pockets.

"I don't smoke," you replied.

He tips his head to the side, "then that time...?"

"I needed an excuse to get out," you explained.

"Ah!" He nods repeatedly.

He walks up to you and stands next to you, looking out at the city view with its city lights like pinpricks against the dark of the night.

"I'm disappointed to find you were gone in the morning," he sadly says.

You can't ignore the fact that you did feel bad for leaving him that morning, especially remembering how you stayed there looking at him lying face down against the mess of the bed, like a fallen angel.

"I just thought that there's nothing left to see in me anymore," you honestly answered.

You hate to sugarcoat anything, if the truth is that bitter then take it like a big girl. And the truth is, there's not much he can see in you anymore, he had seen everything.

"Then why am I here looking for you?" He asks.

"Well, it took you days to finally find me," you subtly sneered.

"Because I have to finish the drawing first, so I have something to show you,"

You turn your head at him, at his beautiful face that you can't get enough of looking at, he doesn't have to invite you to make you come with him, he exceeds your expectations by appearing in front of you, therefore, you have nothing to doubt about him anymore.

"Let me see it," you said to him.

It takes only a few minutes of drive to get to his studio, and he lets you, holding the door open for you.

He leads you to the piece of drawing placed on an easel, he must have just finished it because the pencils are still scattered on the table nearby.

"Shouldn't you be closing my eyes and leading me to the surprise?" You said to him.

He snaps his head in your direction, "should I?"

You lowly chuckle, "It's too late for that,"

Your first instinct when you see the drawing is to touch it, it feels so real and alive, then when you truly see it, you wonder if it's really you, the person on the drawing.

He stands behind you, close enough you can feel heat emitted from his body.

"Why did you leave that day?" He suddenly asks as you admire his drawing.

"Were you scared?"

You withdraw your hand from the drawing, "A little," you honestly answered.

It's better to avoid something, avoid feelings and the misery that comes with it, sooner than later. You don't care about being called a coward, loser, have a commitment issue, you'd rather be the one leaving than the one who's being left.

"Would it scare you if I tell you how I really feel?" He asks as he comes in closer behind you, his chest against your back, heaving with every breath he takes.

He puts his hands on your arms and stays there, he buries his nose in your hair that you feel his warm breath on your scalp.

You hear him sigh so low, like the sound of the wind.

"When I told you to let me have you, I meant it," he says with his hands moving down to meet your hands and clasping it together with his on your sides.

"And I'm going to say it again,"

Your heartbeat quickens, out of rhythm, out of control, and you wonder how you still function when you think you're about to get a cardiac arrest.

Hyunjin puts his head next to yours and turns his head slightly to the side, mouth close to your ear.

"Let me have you," he says to you.

Your skips a beat, no, you believe it skips two beats, you died for two seconds that you grip his hands to take you back to life again

It's not a question, it's a plead, a plead tinted with desperation and hope at the same time.

Hyunjin takes your hands and crosses them in front of you, then hums with his mouth on your neck.

"Will it scares you that the moment I say yes, you cannot escape me?"

You turn your head at him and meet his face, "It'll be an honor to be stuck in your maze," he says.

He opens his mouth then captures your lips in a dazzling kiss, a kiss that knocks on your chest and breaks your heart open, a kiss that sets everything in motion.

Even though it's not the first time he does it with you, that doesn't stop him from taking his time to adore you, admiring your body, touching you, and caressing you with such loving.

He takes your hands and kisses each fingertip, ends it with a kiss inside your palm.

And you close your hands when he finished, hoping you get to keep all his kisses inside your fists.

He plants his hot mouth on your cunt, encourages you to move your hips against him as his tongue incessantly laps your gushing core.

You put your hand in his hair and gently tug at it, a little too hard when you cum on his mouth.

He settles himself beside you on the bed, kissing you with his hand fondling your breast, "have a sweet taste of you," he says against your lips.

And you get a taste yourself on his lips and how it arouses you even more that you lick the rest from around his mouth.

He pulls away just enough to leave a little space between you, "do you like the drawing?"

"You make me look so beautiful in it," you said even though it doesn't answer his question.

"That's how I see you," he says with a hand cupping your jaw. "You're so heavenly," he praises along with a peck on your lips, "so divine," he adds with a peck longer than the previous one.

It would be easy to believe his words if he isn't as beautiful as he said you are.

His beauty prevails anything and anyone you have ever laid your eyes on, it's ethereal and otherworldly.

It makes you wonder, whether he's really yours or you make it all up in your head as you stare into his two dark orbs of his eyes.

"Are you even real?" You asked him in utter disbelief.

He smiles, and instead of replying, he asks in the same, utter disbelief, "Are you really mine?"

You kiss him this time, so hard until you are convinced that it's real and that he isn't fragments of your imagination.

You believe Hyunjin put intimacy above anything, sex isn't just physical for him, it is bonding and trust, a union of not just two bodies but also two souls. You can feel it through his attentive touches, the tender gaze, the gentle kisses, and when the pleasure gets too overwhelming for him, his hand reaches for yours on the bed to clasp it with yours.

You both cum around each other at the same time with his forehead pressed on yours, and you hold him, his body goes rigid as he releases his seed inside you with eyes screwed shut.

He holds you close, not leaving even an inch of space between your bodies as you both drift to sleep with blissful smiles on your faces.

-

A hand grips your wrist when you're about to get off the bed.

"Are you leaving me again?" Hyunjin asks with eyes closed.

You softly chuckle, "You want me to pee on the bed, then?"

He sleepily smiles at you, "you have one minute to get back here,"

"Better hurry then!" You said.

He finally lets go of your hand and starts counting down from 60, slurring his words in the process.

You put on his shirt and head to the bathroom successfully return to the bed in the last four seconds.

He gleefully smiles when you get under the duvet with him again.

He kisses your lips along with a caress on your cheek, "let's get back to sleep," he says.

You wake up late to the sun is already high up in the sky as you see through the window. You slowly get up, and the duvet slides down your body, revealing your naked body underneath, and see Hyunjin sitting on a chair across from you.

"Morning," you said to him, hugging your knees on the bed.

He flashes you a scintillating smile that his eyes form into two crescent moons.

He puts his sketching book away and crawls onto the bed to kiss you on the lips, "Morning," he says back.

"Coffee?"

"Yes, please," you said.

He pecks your lips once again, "I'll get you a cup,"

He returns with a mug of steaming coffee and hands it to you, which you gladly take and wrap your hands around it.

"Do you mind if I finish my drawing?"

You shake your head, "please, proceed," you said to him.

He gives you a quick peck on the lips before sitting on his chair, continuing his drawing.

You sip your coffee while watching him as he glances up at you once in a while, just like usual, there's a crease formed between his eyebrows when he is concentrating.

"Is this how are we going to spend our time together?" You asked.

"You staring at me while I'm watching you draw me,"

He shot you a smile, "is this boring to you?"

"No," you quickly denied.

He puts his sketching book away and sighs, "should we go somewhere?"

"I don't mind staying in," you said to him.

After showering together, Hyunjin takes you on a trip, somewhere he refuses to tell you until you get there. It takes an hour to get there by train, when you arrive at the station, you stop by a diner to have a quick lunch.

He takes you on a walk with him holding your hand, Hyunjin brings his camera with him, and he would stop to take a few pictures of something that interests him.

He takes you to an art gallery, the building itself is so artistic, and when you enter, you look around in awe at how pleasing everything is to the eyes.

Hyunjin leads you to a part of the gallery that hung a lot of paintings on its wall, and you already guessed what he is trying to show you.

"You take me here to brag?" You playfully said to him.

"Yeah, sort of," he replies with a smirk on his face.

You look at the series of paintings on the wall, they're painting of flowers and each painting has slightly different color hues in it, but they oddly make one beautiful gradient of colors, it looks good if they're hung separately or put together as one, either way, it's beautiful.

There's the signature of his name on the right bottom corner of the paintings.

"These are the first paintings that I ever sold," he informs.

He grabs your hand and stands next to you, looking at the paintings together in silence with the same admiration.

"Anemone," you muttered.

"How do you know?"

"My mom is a florist," you shortly replied, "I know the names of flowers by heart,"

"That explains why you look like one," he praises with a smile on his face.

His eyes catch the light and they crinkle like they hold the stars in them.

"And that's also why I never received any flowers in my life," you sadly said.

"Never?" He asks in disbelief.

You shake your head, "Never,"

"I sell them and send them for someone else," you added with a low laugh.

You get quiet to stare at the paintings again, takes a closer look, and see each of his gentle stroke on the canvas, it's amazing how all those strokes of paint can create such a beautiful piece of art.

You put your hand on the small of his back, thumb lazily rub the clothed skin, "this is so beautiful," you said to him.

You can see talent once you see it like this person was born to do this, and Hyunjin was born to be an artist.

"You are so talented," you said again.

"Thank you," he mutters then steals a kiss on your lips.

Finished looking around the gallery, Hyunjin takes you to a bakery shop and buys you a bag of donuts with icing sugar on it.

You take a big bite since the lunch you had was hours ago, the white of the powdered sugar stuck to your lips and around your mouth.

Hyunjin laughs at you but stops you from wiping the mess with your hand.

"Let me do it for you," he says, then kisses you, collecting the powdered sugar with his lips, tongue faintly licks in between.

He finishes with a sweet kiss on your lips, "there you go,"

You take another bite and intentionally make a mess on your lips again.

But Hyunjin only laughs and hands you a stack of tissues this time.

You take a stroll around the city and go to the hill where you can see the view of the sunset over the city, in which Hyunjin cannot stop taking pictures with his camera and sneakily take your pictures without you knowing.

You have dinner at a restaurant near the train station and eventually, fall asleep on Hyunjin’s shoulder on the train back home.

He wakes you up when you arrive and let you rest for a bit more in the taxi, holds you by putting an arm around your shoulder, "you must be tired, mmh?"

You don't answer but nestle your head on the crook of his neck, seeking his warmth even though you're not feeling cold.

He takes your hand on your lap and intertwines it with his, "we'll be home soon," he mutters with a kiss on the top of your head.

Once you get back in his studio, you are fully awake and decide to take a warm shower to wash the day away, Hyunjin joins a while later and helps you wash up your body from the suds.

"Can I borrow your clothes?" You asked him as you dry yourself with a towel.

His hand reaches to untie your bathrobe, "Actually, I want to have you naked on the bed," he says.

He pulls you to sit on his lap with him only in a towel, his dark hair wet and drops of water dripping from its ends.

"Is it okay with you?" He asks you as he pulls you close to hold you, putting his arms around your body.

He parts your bathrobe open and lays a hand flat on your sternum, "I need to feel all of you, skin to skin," he says to your face.

This is the kind of intimacy you never experienced before yet he makes you feel comfortable doing it, moreover, you like having his hands on you, comforting you with his touches.

"Okay," you replied to him.

Hyunjin also takes his towel off before joining you on the bed, he doesn't waste time putting his hands on you, touching you with such care, and kissing your skin.

Knowing that you had a well-spent day makes you happy inside and out, makes you feel content and oddly at peace like you're right where you wanted to be.

You fall asleep carrying those feelings with you.

In the middle of the night, you feel Hyunjin’s hands tighten around you, and you turn your head to meet his, "I want to be inside you," he says.

You kiss him on the mouth to let him know he got your permission.

His hand goes to palm your sex until it's wet enough for him to penetrate you, he lifts one of your legs on the bed then slowly pushes his length inside you from behind.

Even with your head party fogged with sleep, you can't ignore the pleasure of being filled by him.

Hyunjin rubs your abdomen as he keeps pushing his cock so deep inside you and lets out a low groan so close to your ear when he fully bottomed out.

He kisses your neck and jaw, "you feel so good, love," he murmurs into your ear.

He does nothing but goes back to sleep with his cock buried inside you.

Hyunjin catches you again trying to leave in the morning, "you need to stop this habit," he mumbles with eyes closed.

"I didn't mean to sneak out but I need to go," you explained, "I have class today,"

"But it's still," he pauses to glance at the clock on the bedside table, "It's 6 am,"

"I have to stop by my place and change my clothes," you reminded him that you haven't changed your clothes in two days.

"Wear my clothes," he offers.

You softly chuckle as if his clothes wouldn't engulf you whole, "I'll be back here after class, okay?" you said to him.

He stays on the bed with a hand prop against the mattress, you can see that he's not willing to let you go.

"Get back soon, okay?" He says to you then kisses the inside of your hand.

"I will," you come to hover above him, cup his face to place a kiss on his plush lips

"Bye," you said as soon as you let go of the kiss.

-

When you're away from him, you feel like you're going back to reality, back to your boring, strenuous, dull life, and your assignments are piling up, waiting for you to start working on them.

And Hyunjin always needs you around, even though most of the time you spend with him is watching him drawing or painting, and once in a while, he would come up to you for some cuddles and kisses.

You also learn that he is always late for his meals, oftentimes, you have to stop him from working on his art and tell him to eat, you are more than happy to take care of him, but only as far as he lets you.

He's a grown-up after all, and you are not obligated to raise him cause you're not his mother.

And then it becomes a habit, being with him.

A dangerous yet delightful habit.

You feel like a fish out of the water when you're not with him, and you're aware of how wrong that sounds.

You realize that you took part in creating this, but you can't help it, you just want to gravitate towards him, revolves around him as much as he treats you like you are his sun.

There are also times when you just can't help it, you just get this sudden urge to meet him that your feet unconsciously lead you there without you intended to.

Once he opens the door of the studio, you throw yourself at him.

"Why aren't you in class?" He asks as he wraps you around him.

"My class got canceled," you answered.

You look up at his beautiful face that endlessly fascinates you and kiss him, letting him know that you come here for him and that you want him to touch you, kiss you, and more.

You steer his body to the sofa until he plops down onto the sofa, then sits on his lap, straddling him.

Sensing that you are being needy, he smiles at you with his hands holding your face, "tell me what you want," he says.

He kisses you so softly, wet and warm on your lips, "what do you want me to do to you?"

He takes your hand and does what he likes to do with your hands, kisses the fingertips.

"You want me to take care of you?"

His lips graze your hand that he holds close to his mouth as he speaks.

You place a kiss on his lips, a long, dizzying kiss that takes your breath away, then sighs into his mouth.

"I want to have you my way," you said to him.

He moves his hands down to grab you by the waist, "I'm all yours," he said with his eyes looking into yours.

Hyunjin has successfully made a fool out of you, you can't think of anything else when you're with him, but him, he makes you crave his presence in your life, he makes you addicted to his touches and kisses, and without all that, you feel like living while holding your breath.

His existence in your life has come to a great extent, it's paramount.

He looks up at you, watching your face with your jaws slacked open and breathless moans spilling out of your mouth.

Hyunjin’s eyes lower to where your cunt slides up and down his cock then snaps his eyes back up to where your hand kneading your breast that invites him to touch the other one.

"So beautiful, my love," he murmurs at you.

You look down at him and flash him a dreamy smile, lowering your mouth on his again with your hands on his shoulders as you keep moving against him.

Hyunjin drags his mouth down to your neck, making a trail of slobbering wet kisses down your chest until your breasts are right in front of him.

He takes them into his mouth in turns, sucking on the flesh and using his tongue to swirl around your nipples, making them hard and wet.

You can't decide which one is more arousing, you fucking him in the middle of the day or his eyes locked on how your cunt taking his cock with his hands steadily keeping your skirt scrunched up around your waist.

"Hmm yes, love," he coo, "so good,"

With his sweet praises echoing in the quiet room, you pick up the pace, bouncing on him harder and faster, with him putting his hands on your waist, preventing you from falling as you move at a sloppy pace.

"So close, I know you're so close," he breathlessly says.

Sweet nothings spilling out of his mouth as a way to encourage you to keep moving.

"The way you clench around me," he murmurs, "you're going to make a mess out of me,"

You bury your head into his neck and sink your mouth onto the skin, muffle your moans as you climax, cumming around him but keep the motions of your hips going, to ride out your high.

He holds you close and kisses the side of your face, "you're so beautiful," he whispers into your ear, "so beautiful cumming around me like that,"

You kiss him passionately and slowly grind on him to give him a chance to cum inside you, intentionally clenching around him.

Hyunjin smirks as he catches on to your intention, his hands firmly grip your waist to move you against him again to the pace he prefers.

You don't care about having crescent marks on your flesh, you are too fucked out to worry about such things.

Hyunjin bucks his hips from under you and eventually, earn his high and cumming inside you.

He pulls you by your neck to kiss you, open-mouthed and slobbering wet.

You glance down at the clock on the wall and notice you only have less than a half-hour to get to your next class.

You place a haste kiss on his lips, "I have to go," you said to him.

You quickly kiss him again to prevent him from complaining, then carefully pull out of him, you gasp at the sudden hollowness inside you but feel so full at the same time.

Hyunjin’s jaws slack open seeing the white of his cum dripping down your thigh, and you put your underwear back on without wiping the mess first.

You pick up the rest of your clothes on the floor and put it on, all the while Hyunjin watches you while sitting naked on the sofa with his cock wet and softened at the dissipating pleasure.

"Did you just use me?" He jokes as he pulls his jeans back up and zips them close.

You shrug as you button your shirt, "Maybe," you playfully replied. You frantically gather your things around the room and put your shoes on, "I'll be back later," you said to him.

Hyunjin gets up from the sofa to get a kiss from you before letting you leave again, he so badly wants to make you stay and perhaps go for another round.

For the rest of the day, Hyunjin smirks with his mouth slightly parted open for every time he remembers how you walk around with his cum inside you.

-

Hyunjin cannot stop drawing you.

And yes, the first time he met you, he thought you have beautiful hands, but that was before he saw the rest of your body before he could put his own hands on your body and touch your skin, how soft it feels under his touch.

Before he saw the shape of your body against the white bed sheet, the way your waist dipped, how your toes are smaller than his and curls when he touches you the right way, the noises you make, and the curve of your smile that resembles a bright crescent moon.

He believes you are made of lovely, heavenly things only.

When you wake up from the bed with the sun shining down on your naked body, he feels like he is in one of those moments where life imitates art.

Your long hair tousled and fell on your shoulders, a few strands covering your chest, the white duvet pooling around you resembles the foam that gave birth to Aphrodite, and you are a goddess to him, for you always mesmerizing him in so many ways.

Botticelli's The Birth of Venus comes to life right before his eyes.

He has done countless drawings of you but none close enough to depict how beautiful you are to him, and he probably will never be able to.

These past few weeks have been anything he truly wanted from sharing a life with someone.

He likes that you rarely talk, but once you do, it always overflows with charms and warmth, he likes sharing the silence with you but still being able to communicate by body gestures and simple touches.

Sometimes he needs to be alone, in his own space and stuck in his head to stimulate the creativity in him for him to be able to start painting or drawing, and most of the time, he needs your intervention, to reel him back to reality and comfort him.

You understand all of these needs of him without him needing to say a word.

And he thinks he is so lucky to find someone like you!

Knowing that he gets so protective of you and wants to have you just for himself.

This morning, you come up to him and hug him from the back, peppering his shoulder with sweet, gentle kisses.

"I'm going to meet some friends for lunch," you said to him.

He doesn't reply but continues working open a can of paint.

"Will you come with me?" You ask him, putting your chin on his shoulder with your hands around his waist.

"But it's okay if you don't want to," you said again even though he's not responding to any of your words.

Hyunjin can get too sensitive sometimes, and he refrains from saying things, not before he filters it through his mind first to avoid saying things he didn't mean.

"I can't," he finally replies, "I have to start on the new painting,"

You place a soft kiss on his neck with your hands feeling the firm abs under the fabric of his t-shirt, "alright then, I'll just go by myself," you said.

You move your hand to his chin and angle it towards you to kiss him on the lips.

"I'll come back soon," You promised him.

He kisses you back for a brief moment to finally let you leave for the bathroom to shower.

You put Hyunjin’s shirt that you wore to bed into the laundry basket, then turn on the water, test the temperature by holding out a hand under the shower.

You get startled when you hear someone pull open the shower curtain with so much force, and turns out, it's Hyunjin.

And before you can say anything, he splashes you with a can of yellow paint, and it gets all over you, the paint dribbling down your body.

"What is wrong with you?" You snapped at him.

He doesn't say anything but takes off his t-shirt then gets in the shower with you, he picks up another can of paint and splashes himself with it, paints his body blue.

"What is wrong with you?" You asked again with your hands held up in the air, still slightly shocked at what he had just done to you and himself.

"I won't let you leave until we both turn these paints green," he answers.

You sigh and glare at him, slightly upset, but when his hand reaches for your cheek, smearing the blue of his paint on you, you soften almost immediately.

"You can just tell me you don't want me to go," you grumbled at him as he pins you to the tiled wall.

He gently kisses your lips for a few seconds and pulls away, eyes staring into yours, "where's the fun in that?"

He pushes his body against yours, mixing the paints through your bodies and hands, mouths constantly latching onto each other.

His hands make handprints on your body as well as marking it with his mouth as he is nipping at your neck, sucking on the flesh until reddish marks bloom on your skin.

He puts you under the shower and washes your bodies together with the warm water, he triumphantly smiles seeing all the marks he made on your skin when paint washes down, the base of the tub filled with green-hued water swirling down the drain.

He continues by taking you to bed, where he makes love to you so sweetly under the afternoon sun.

Hyunjin usually indulges himself by keeping eye contact during sex, but this time, he flips you over on the bed then hurriedly runs his hand down your spine, admiring how beautiful you look from the back.

He fingers you from the back, shoves his long thumb into your hole with his mouth incessantly kissing the skin on your back.

With the pillow underneath your head, you grip the pillowcase in your hand when he replaces his finger with his cock, and you moan at how good it feels to be filled by him.

He doesn't necessarily have to move to feel the pleasure, just having his cock inside you is enough for him, well, until you clench around him.

That, he cannot control, and his body reacts on its own.

He begins moving to eventually reach your sweet releases together with his body on top of you and hands laced together on the mattress.

He turns you over on the bed and lets you face him with his face only inches away from your face, then slowly presses a kiss on your lips ever so softly.

He rubs your cheek with the back of his hand and looks into your eyes, "I love you," he mutters to you.

You put a hand on his face, "I love you," you muttered back even if it scares you, the way he loves you.

There are two reasons why it scares you: First, you're afraid you can't love him back as much, the other reason, and what scares you the most is that he will tire himself out one day if he keeps on loving you this much, with such intensity, almost obsessive even.

You can only imagine the unbearable pain that comes with it, and you hope you will never get to experience that.

-

The next day starts with him touching you, drawing you close against him on the bed, spooning you, and peppering your neck with small kisses.

A hand on your stomach slowly inches closer to your breast to eventually cups it in his hand, kneading on the flesh with his fingers playing with your hardening bud.

You turn your head to the side to meet his, with your sleepy eyes, you capture his mouth in yours, your hand reach down his body and easily find his semi-hard cock behind you.

He pinches your nipple with his finger so hard, making you yelp against his mouth, and he smirks in return.

You grumble and break the kiss, but he likes you sulking adorably like that, he does the same thing to the other nipple to earn the same reaction from you.

"Hyunjin," you grumbled again.

He laughs on the nape of your neck, "who tells you to be this beautiful, mmh?" He asks with a hand cupping your breast and softly squeezing on it.

Hyunjin can't have enough, lifts one of your legs like he usually does, then pushes his length inside you, painstakingly slow and making you feel every inch of his girth entering you.

You take his hand and put his fingers into your mouth, sucking on them as he keeps pushing the remaining of his length inside you.

He grabs a handful of your ass cheek in his hand when finally bottomed out, softly groaning close to your ear, then presses a kiss on the skin behind your ear.

"Always taking me so well," he cooed at you.

He slowly thrusts into you with a hand rubbing the back of your thigh, keeping it lifted on the bed to penetrate deeper.

"We can't stay in today," he suddenly informs.

You pull his fingers out of your mouth with a sigh, "huh? Why?"

"I got invited to this thing,"

You turn your head at him and bring his face close to kiss him, "you want me to come with you?"

"Of course," he shortly replies.

He kisses you again with a hum against your lips, "I want to show you off to everyone," he says.

You chuckle at his answer, "I'm not an object,"

"I know," he says, "but I want to let everyone know that I have the most beautiful lover,"

Because the word girlfriend sounds obnoxious to him, and he's romantic like that.

You smile at his praise and feel a knot tighten inside you.

Hyunjin groans against your lips, "You just clenched around me, love,"

"You like it when I praise you like that, mmh?" He asked you.

You don't reply but sheepishly smile at him, pulling him for another lingering kiss.

"I happen to have a lot of praises for you," he playfully remarked.

"Where should I start?" He sighs and considers his options.

He clicks his tongue in defeat, "Uhm... every part of you is beautiful," he praises.

You catch his chin between your thumb and index finger, "stop saying such cheesy things early in the morning," you complained, then kiss him.

He takes you to an art exhibition of one of his friends, in which he introduces you and to other people he is well-acquainted with.

His friend takes him to introduce him to someone, "will you be okay alone?" He asked you.

"Of course. I'll wait here," you tell him.

You take the opportunity to walk around and see the art installations, see some paintings, and see his painting that hung against the blue painted wall.

"So, you're his new muse?" A voice says.

You turned your head at the source of the voice and see someone holding a glass of wine in her hand while looking at the same painting with you.

"Excuse me?" You said, just in case she was talking to someone else, despite you're the only one close enough to hear it.

She turns her head at you, "what did he tell you when he first met you?"

You don't say anything but carefully observe her in silence, a tall beautiful woman with dark hair, she is wearing a flattering dress that accentuates her body shape.

"When he first met me, he said I have the most beautiful eyes," she adds,

"I'm sorry?" You asked again, completely fazed by her remark.

"I saw you coming with Hyunjin, so I assume you're together," she finally explained.

You stifle a nod, "yes, we're together"

And she snickers, "I'm sorry," she quickly apologized, "it's just that I never thought he would be having a girlfriend again,"

You turn to face her, confronting whatever she is trying to say or do to you, "And you are?"

"You can say that I'm his former muse," she answered.

"Oh, so you're trying to make me jealous?" You bite back at her.

"Jealous?" She asked in disbelief.

"I've been with him before you. Why would I be jealous?"

You tip your head to the side, fully confused with what she is trying to tell you, "what are you trying to say, really?"

She sighs and holds her wine glass down, "I'm trying to tell you that he's not an easy man to be with," she answered.

"Once he's done with you, he'll search for a new muse,"

You scoff at her remark, "Why would I believe you?"

"You're tough," she sneers, but it is not time to praise you.

"But be prepared to bleed,"

She takes a sip of her wine then says, "just saying," before leaving you there alone.

No matter how much you try to shrug her words away, the harder it gets to shake them off. You flinch when Hyunjin returns by looping his arm around your waist and kissing your cheek.

"Did I surprise you?" He asks.

You sigh with the warmth of his body enveloping you, "Nothing, I was so immersed in your painting," you told him, slightly lying to mask your insecurities.

He puts his other arm around you, holding you from the back with his chin on the top of your head, "what do you think?"

"It's beautiful," you answered.

"Just like you," he adds, then kisses the top of your head.

The funny thing is the longer you look into his painting, the sadder you get.

You hold on to his hands to soothe you down, to ward away the fear crippling inside of you, and try your hardest to convince yourself that everything is alright and going to stay like that.

He holds you so tight at night, knowing that you wouldn't be able to stay with him for the rest of the week since you'll be having your exams.

The timing comes at the perfect time because he too has a deadline to finish his paintings for his next exhibition.

His touches that always work to lull you to sleep seem to lose their magic that night.

He senses that you're unusually restless that he places kisses on your bare shoulder while rubbing your abdomen with his big hand.

"Are you okay?" He asked you.

You softly sigh and put your hand in his, "I just can't sleep. Maybe the pre-exam stress?" you playfully remarked.

"There's no use to stress about things that haven't happened yet," he said, "you end up stressing about them twice,"

And he is right, there's no benefit in fussing about things that haven't happened yet and probably will never happen, you end up manifesting those awful things, and you don't want that.

"You'll do great," he assures you along with a kiss on your cheek.

There's nothing sexual in his kiss, but somehow it's more sensual than the sex itself, maybe it's the sincerity in it, the words that came before it, and the assurance he gives to you.

You feel so loved and safe, you get so convinced that everything is going to be alright.

You turn around to face him on the bed and look at his beautiful face, radiant even in the dark of his room, you realize that all you need to do is focus on things that matter to you, him.

"You'll do great as well," you told him.

"You're going to finish all those paintings," you added with a finger tracing his narrowed jaw.

"And you're going to do great on your exams," he says back with a smile.

You kiss him with your heart overflowing with gratitude for him, then bury your head in his chest, listening to his steady heartbeat to finally fall asleep in his embrace.

-

It had been days you'd been away from each other.

On one side, you're happy you get to have a little space for yourself, but on the other hand, you're afraid that the space you put yourself in will only drive you further away from each other.

Added with the fact that the words from his former girlfriend lingering in the back of your head like a broken record.

You went to his studio right after you were done with the final day of the exam, unlocking his door with the passcode he gave you, then get inside to find him talking to a guy you had never seen before.

You stay in the distance since they're engaging in a serious talk, you catch parts of their conversations, something about his paintings, the exhibition, it seems like this guy wants Hyunjin to finish his paintings before the deadline.

Hyunjin spots you lingering in the kitchen and tells you to come, you obey and walk up to him.

"This is my agent," he introduces you to the guy.

You shake his big, meaty hand and introduce yourself.

After a moment of some light talks, he leaves with Hyunjin sending him on his way.

You wait in the middle of his painting studio to see his unfinished painting on the easel, you touch the visible stroke of his paintbrush on it and feel the roughness of it under your fingertips.

"I'm sorry that I couldn't pick you up at the campus," he says to you as he closes the door behind him.

You turn on your heels to face him, "it's okay, I'm just glad the exams are over," you sigh.

Hyunjin stops on his way and takes steps backward, "wait, I have something for you," he says.

He goes to the fridge and pulls out a bouquet of flowers, smiling while carrying it to you.

"I bought it this morning, and I'm afraid it would wither so I keep it in the fridge," he explains, then hands it to you.

You look down at the red roses, as red as the blood that rushes to your cheeks, making you blush, then looks up at him to flash him a smile.

You can't explain why but you feel a burst of mixed feelings brewing inside of you.

"You said you never received flowers before, and I want to be the first to do that," he says.

Your eyes start brimming with tears, you believe it is caused by the mounting stress and the fears of losing him finally getting the best of you, and with him showing his love like this melts your misery away in an instant.

"Why are you crying?" He asks you with his fingers lifting your chin so he can look at you.

You shake your head, "thank you," you muttered, "I love this,"

He brightly smiles then pulls you into a hug, "you must have been so stressed,"

He pets your head endearingly while you close your eyes with one side of your face resting against his chest.

"What about we take a bath together, mmh?" He suggests.

You look up at him and sniffle, "I'd love that,"

He kisses your forehead, "Okay, I'll have the bath ready for us,"

Hyunjin fills the bathtub with a bubble bath with calming scent in it, he gets in first then helps you get in after.

He holds you with a hand across your chest, splashing your skin with the warm bathwater, and softly washes your body with his attentive hands.

He rubs your thighs under the water, gently kneading on the flesh, glides his hands along your sides to your chest, a hand angles your head to plant a kiss on you.

"Feel better now?" He asks.

"So much better," you answered with a dreamy sigh.

You get so sleepy after the bath and perhaps it is because all the pressures has been lifted off of you.

You lay on the bed facing each other with Hyunjin caressing the side of your face affectionately while looking into your half-shut eyes.

"Your eyes are barely open," he says.

"I'm so sleepy," you mumbled.

He softly chuckles, "go to sleep then,"

You sleepily smile then place a quick peck on his lips, "Goodnight!"

"Goodnight, love," he murmurs back, then takes your hand in his, bringing it close to his mouth to do that thing where he kisses your fingertips.

You think you dreamed it, but when you wake up in the middle of the night, Hyunjin is nowhere on the bed next to you.

You sit up on the bed, from the bedroom door that he left ajar, you see the sliver of his silhouette in the studio working on his painting.

It crosses your mind to walk up to him and accompany him as he paints, but you realize you can't do much, you might be a nuisance for being there.

You lay back down on the bed and sleep.

-

Hyunjin takes his art seriously.

It's his body and soul.

When you see his paintings, you'll see how much he put himself in them, like he puts a piece of himself in each of his paintings.

That's how much it means to him.

That's also why he gets sensitive when he's working.

You try not to disturb him when he's in element, not even when you see he hasn't eaten his lunch yet. You still check on him once in a while, replace his empty bottle of water with a new one and remind him to eat his meals.

You have been going to bed alone for the past few days, and when you see his sketchbook on the desk, it has been left untouched.

You take a look to see the drawings he made of you, you flip the page to see the drawing of your hands, your feet peeking out from under the blanket, the one where you're sleeping on the pillow, and you realize he had drawn you so many times without you noticing.

Even though you have to go to sleep alone to bed for these past few days, you feel his warmth from the drawing he had done of you.

What you're worried about is the fact that he's getting less sleep every night.

But turns out, that should be the least of your worries.

Because the next day after you're back from campus, he is gone.

He left his phone in his bedroom, no notes, he is just gone. You cheer yourself up by thinking maybe he takes a walk or goes somewhere to clear his head, you wait until evening comes by pacing around his studio.

You fall asleep around midnight, curling up on the bed clutching your phone just in case he tries to contact you.

You wake up at dawn and hear the rustles from the studio, find Hyunjin is working on his painting, you sigh in relief and almost cry because of it.

You come up to him and hug him from the back, you don't care if this will irritate him.

Hyunjin does the opposite, he puts his hands on yours and sighs, "I'm sorry for leaving without telling you,"

You rest your head against his back with your eyes closed, "I've been waiting for you," you sadly said.

"I need to clear my head," he explains.

You nod repeatedly, "can we go to bed now, please?" You pleaded.

Truthfully, you hate being a needy, clingy partner, but you really need to be held by him, you miss his touches, his warmth, to put it simply, you need his presence around you.

"Okay," he agreed.

You take his clothes off for him in which he eventually takes them off himself, it's the rule that he made himself to always come to bed naked.

You get on the bed and wait for him to join you under the duvet, you don't waste time laying yourself so close to him, feeling his smooth skin against yours and sharing some warmth.

You overlap his body with yours to kiss him, placing kisses on his body like he would do to you as a way to comfort him.

You climb on top of him then put your legs on each side of his then sit up to straddle him on the bed.

You grind on him, making yourself wet, then take his hands and put them on your body, kneading your breasts along with his hands.

When you're wet enough to take him, you get up just enough to position his cock under you, align it with your hole, then slowly ease yourself down around him.

You let out a breathless gasp when he's fully inside you, you tilt your head upward.

"This is my happy place," you hummed with a blissful smile on your face.

Hyunjin can't find you more alluring than this, truly enjoying having him inside you, and he also can't deny how much he misses being inside you, your velvety walls wrapped around him, tight and warm.

You lay down on top of him, kissing him hungrily on the mouth, savoring his plush red lips like there's no tomorrow.

"I feel so much better," he sighs with a dreamy smile, "this is exactly what I need,"

He then holds you close and lays his hands flat on the small of your back, rubbing your skin up and down your sides and his mouth placing fluttering kisses on your face.

"You're what I need," he adds.

You smile at him, then nestle your head in his neck, glad that he's back to the Hyunjin who passionately loves you, and loves you still.

And when you think things are back to their right places, you are wrong.

The disappearing, the going somewhere without telling you, and leaving his phone at home getting more frequent as the deadline of his paintings nearing in, it has happened for a few times now that it worries you.

He still has one painting left to do, yet his canvas is still blank, pristine white with no speck of paint on it.

You sigh, understand that he must be having an art block, that's why he needs to get out of the studio, to refresh his mind and get inspired to paint again.

He'll come home late at night, continue painting until he gets tired, then sleep, collapsing next to you on the bed.

No kiss goodnight, no fluttering little touches that he usually does to send you to sleep, he just lays down, closes his eyes, then sleeps.

A part of you is glad that he finally finished his last painting, but the other part of you got sad seeing him working so hard, exhausted and worn out.

You let him get more sleep when you wake up in the morning, get to the kitchen to make breakfast, and brew some coffee.

You notice his bag on the kitchen island with his things spilling out of it, pens, pencils, and books cluttering around.

You place them back inside the bag, then take his book out to see what he's writing in it.

Of course, he doesn't write, he draws on it, from flowers, ducks swimming on the pond, a tree, a building, then a pair of hands in which you guess is yours, then an unfinished drawing of a face.

"You didn't wake me up," he says from the doorway of the bedroom.

You snap your head up and quickly shove his book back inside his bag, "you need to get more sleep," you told him.

"I can't. I have to meet my agent today," he says, then walks up to you in the kitchen.

"Do you want me to go with you?" You offered.

"No," he shortly replies.

You can't hide your disappointment, whether at his quick reply or that he doesn't want you to come with him.

"It'll be a boring meeting, and I won't be long," he explains with a hand cupping your cheek.

You nod at him, understand that maybe the reason why he doesn't want you to come along is that perhaps it's strictly business.

"I'll cook breakfast," you told him with a small smile at him.

He pecks your lips, "thank you, love,"

Hyunjin always keeps his words, but when you glance at the clock and it's past dinner time, and the dinner you have prepared for you two has gone cold that you reheat again to eat it on the dining table alone.

Hyunjin comes home when you're about to tuck in for the night, he barges into the bedroom and collapses onto the bed. He crawls on the bed to hug you, burying his head in your neck, then kisses your cheek.

You catch a hint of alcohol in his breath, "you've been drinking, huh?"

Hyunjin pulls away then lays on the bed next to you, "my agent insists on taking me for some drinks and I couldn't say no," he explains.

Hyunjin starts unbuttoning his shirt but failing since he's slightly drunk that his cheeks redden from the alcohol.

You shift on the bed to help him unbutton it and even lift his body to take the shirt off.

"You said you won't be long," you meekly said.

Once again, you hate being sounded like a clingy girlfriend but the disappearing and the didn't keep his words have pushed all the wrong buttons in you.

Hyunjin let out a long sigh, "the meeting took hours, and I-"

He sighs again, then turns over, lying facing down on the bed, "Actually, can we continue the talk tomorrow? I'm so tired," he says.

You slouch down the bed and lie on your side with your back facing him, wide-eyed and can't sleep, you get off the bed and head to the kitchen, pour yourself a glass of water, and gulp it at once.

You see his bag on the kitchen island, you get curious and open his bag to see what he has drawn in his book today, at least, to get a clue on what's inside his head.

You flip to the page to the last drawing he did on it and see a drawing of someone, someone so beautiful with doe eyes and button nose then you flip to the previous page, it's the same drawing of the same person from the side, and you flip again, still the same person and it's the unfinished drawing that you had seen a few days ago.

The fear starts creeping up inside you again as his ex-girlfriend's words are becoming true.

What if you are just his muse?

That you are a person he uses to evoke inspirations in him, and soon you'll be replaced once you're not doing it for him anymore.

You drag yourself back to bed and lay down on the bed next to him with uneasy thoughts running through your head and making you stare at the dark of the room for don't know how long.

You feel a hand around your waist and drags you closer to him, he presses a kiss on your neck.

"Why are you wearing clothes to bed, love?" he mumbles to you.

You start unbuttoning the shirt that you're wearing and hang it on the headboard of the bed, settling yourself down next to him again.

He immediately pulls you close on the bed, kisses your bare chest, then rests his head on the skin between your breasts.

"My love," he sighs.

He takes your hand and puts it in his hair, "I miss having your hand in my hair,"

You comply with his request, softly combing his silky hair with your fingers like you always do when you cuddle him.

But even though he is lying close to you, it's not enough to calm the fear inside you, wild and uncontrollable like a raging storm.

-

"You're so quiet," Hyunjin says as he lays next to you on the bed with a finger tracing the round of your cheek.

"I'm okay," you assured him with a lazy smile on your face.

While in fact, you are not okay.

You have been living your days holding your breath, and you can feel your heart shrink the longer you keep it that way.

You retreat from talking since his exhibition is coming soon and he has a lot going on in his mind already.

"Should we go somewhere?" He asks.

You shake your head.

"How about I cook you something?" He offers.

You hold his hand on the bed.

"Is there anything you want to eat, love?" He asks again along with a caress on your head.

You don't reply but look at him looking at you back into your eyes and close your eyes when he swipes his thumb across your lips.

"I hate seeing you like this," he sadly says.

You feel bad for making him sad because of you, "I crave something sweet," you weakly said to him.

A smile blooms on his face, bright like a sunrise.

Hyunjin makes pancakes and stacks them on a plate, putting a big dollop of whipped cream on it with strawberry slices on top.

He puts a hand on your head then kisses the top of your head.

"Eat well, my love," he says to you as he places the plate in front of you on the dining table.

He watches as you shove a forkful of pancake into your mouth and quickly wipes the cream on the corner of your mouth with his thumb, "is it good?"

You nod with giddiness with a wide smile on your face, then take another forkful and feed it to him, which he gladly eat.

Hyunjin glances at the clock on the wall and sighs, "I have to go," he announces.

"You finish the pancakes, okay?" He kisses your cheek and gets up from the chair.

Once Hyunjin leaves, it's only time until the fear eats you up from the inside again.

On the day of his exhibition, you promised to meet him at the gallery instead of going together since you have to finish some of your college assignments first.

You clutch your purse anxiously when you step inside the gallery, holding your breath as you walk until you find him among the crowd.

He's radiance, almost blinding.

He smiles the moment he notices you coming his way he walks up to you to meet you in the middle.

He grabs your hand, "You're so beautiful," he murmurs.

You've heard him calling you beautiful so many times, and each time never fails to make your heart flips, "thank you!"

He kisses your lips hastily, and you quickly wipe the stain of your lipstick on his lips with your thumb.

"Congratulations!" You greeted him with a sweet smile.

"Thank you," he mutters and when he is about to plant another kiss, someone calls out for him from across the room.

"It's okay, you go," you told him.

"I'll get back to you, okay?"

You nod and watch as he walks to a group of people in one corner of the room.

You decide to get a drink from the table that serves a selection of snacks and drinks, take a glass of drink, and carry it in your hand as you walk to see his paintings.

You are surprised to see a painting of your hands made it to his exhibition, but as you look closer there's a faint mole on the back of the hand.

You look down at your hand in reflex to check if you really do have a mole but can't find any.

Someone accidentally bumps into you as you make your way to the next painting, making you spill all of your drink on your white dress.

"I am so sorry," the girl said.

You look down at your dress and see the big wet patch on the side of your dress, it's ruined but you can't do anything about it.

"It's okay," you meekly said without looking up at her.

You see the red high heels she's wearing since you keep looking down to avoid getting embarrassed with your dress ruined by the wine.

You quickly leave for the restroom to fix whatever you can with the dress, wiping it dry with tissue and the hand dryer, but they can only do much.

You walk back into the gallery and head to Hyunjin to see if you can borrow his jacket or something, but find him talking to a girl.

From the red shoes you spotted earlier, she's the girl who bumped into your earlier. You keep walking but slowing down as the girl slowly turns around on her heels to finally reveal herself to you.

She's her.

She is that person Hyunjin drew on his book.

Then the mole on the back of her hand.

And she is just as beautiful as his drawing, so beautiful that you feel so self-conscious about your appearance.

You walk backward and eventually make your way out of the gallery, keep on walking and walking until you don't know how you get there.

You take a taxi home, back to your place, and curl up on the bed, a crying mess in the dark of your room.

You see your reflection on the mirror across you, you lying on your side with tears in your eyes, and in a time like this, you regret opening your heart, let it be hurt.

You've been loving him at full speed, and now you're forced to abruptly stop. Can you imagine how fatal the crash would be?

Your heart hurts so much that you fisted the sheet under your to hold it in, biting in your choked sobs and swallowing it all, a big bitter pill down your throat.

Your eyes snap open to the banging sounds on your door.

"I know you're inside," he shouts behind the door, "Open the door!"

You know it's him, he must have sensed something is wrong with you suddenly leaving the gallery without telling him first.

"I won't go before you open the door," he shouts again with another series of banging on the door.

You reluctantly get off the bed and walk to the door, you take a deep breath before pulling it open.

Hyunjin dashes inside the moment you open the door for him, doesn't waste his time to confront you, "why are you leaving like that?" He asks you, his eyebrows furrowed in anger.

You stand there facing him, in the middle of the small living room of your apartment, "and it's okay for you to keep disappearing but not me?"

He comes up to you and holds your face in his hands, "I thought you understand me, " he sadly says.

"What I don't understand is why you draw some other girl," you said to him.

Hyunjin scoffs in disbelief, "so this is about me drawing another girl?"

You are aware of how petty you sound right now, but you're way past being pathetic.

"I-" you pause to take a deep breath.

"I've been trying to figure out what am I to you? Am I just a muse to you? A model for your drawings? Someone, you sleep with?"

Your voice is trembling from the emotions building up inside you.

"I honestly don't know, Hyunjin," you sadly said to him with your eyes closed as if they would prevent the tears from falling.

"Look at me!" He orders you.

Hyunjin put his fingers under your chin, forcing you to look at him, and he looks into your eyes, red and pooling with tears.

"How dare you say you're just someone I sleep with?"

You can feel the bitterness in his words when he uttered it right to your face, "you mean so many things to me that I can't put a word for it," softly says, "you are everything to me," he emphasizes on the word everything.

But his words only make you cry harder.

He holds you close, steers your body by slightly lifting your body against him, then sits you down on the end of your bed.

He kneels in front of you, hair tousled with a few strands covering his face, a crease between his eyebrows and eyes looking up at you with a mix of concern, anger, and sadness in them.

"What are you thinking? What makes you think you mean so little to me?" There's an edge to his voice like he could break into tears at any moment.

You keep closing your eyes to stop the tears, but it's a fruitless effort, "I thought you don't love me anymore," you get breathless at the end of the sentence as the lump in your throat clogs your windpipe.

"My God," he sighs, "I made you feel that way?"

You keep crying into your hands as the tears won't stop streaming down your face.

Hyunjin rests his head on your lap with his hands around your waist, you can feel every rise and fall of his chest for every intake of his breath, and he stays like that for a moment.

He snaps his head up, puts your hands away from covering your face, then looks up at you, "I hate myself for making you feel that way," he says in such a low voice that you mistake it for a whisper.

"I am so sorry," he says as he holds both of your hands in his.

You get even sadder to the fact that you are the one who accused of him things, but he's the one who apologized to you.

"I will do anything to prove how much I love you," he says, pressing his lips on your knuckles.

When you look into his eyes, filled with so much sincerity in them, you feel ashamed for ever doubting his love.

"What can I do to make you feel my love?" He asks, then presses his forehead against yours even though you are a crying mess right now.

"Please stop crying! My heart aches to see you cry," he begs.

You take a few deep breaths to calm yourself down, and Hyunjin helps by rubbing your neck with his hands.

He leans in and kisses you.

ou return the kiss, slowly and softly, closing your eyes as to not spill any tears again.

"I love you," he says against your lips.

He catches your chin between his fingers and forces you to look at him, "do you hear that?" He asks you.

"I love you," he says again.

You stifle a nod.

"I don't care if you don't love me back," he says, "I love you," then kisses you again, he's whimpering against your lips as if it hurts to kiss you.

He pulls away to place kisses on your face, on your neck with a hand that steadily holds your jaw, and you give in to his will, tilt your head to let him access your neck.

"Take your clothes off for me," he orders as he puts his mouth away.

"I want to show you how much I love you,"

You obey, get up from the bed and start stripping your clothes off one by one then lay down on the bed as he instructed you.

Hyunjin also takes his clothes off then climbs onto the bed, he looks down at your naked body, flustered under his lustful gaze.

He kisses every part of your body affectionately from head to toe, every kiss is longer than the previous one, searing and burning, hot to the touch.

He flips you over on the bed so he too, can kiss the back of your body, from the crook of your neck to your calves.

This is the kind of intimacy you can't just get anywhere, it's beyond, it's not just his mouth all over your body, it's the way he appreciates and admires every inch of your body.

He turns you over on the bed to face him, hurriedly places a kiss on your mouth passionately, he gasps when he let go of the kiss.

"I want to make love to you," he says.

And he's the only one who can say such romantic things, but you don't find it phony or annoying, because you know he meant it with all his heart.

His hand moves to your abdomen and lays his hand flat there, "I want to fill you with a part of me," he says to you.

You nod at him, surrendering yourself at him and to his will with your hands turned up on the bed.

Hyunjin slowly kisses you down your chest as he settles himself between your legs, a hand tracing your folds, teasing your gushing hole with his fingers.

He doesn't break eye contact with you from the moment he gets inside you, making you even more naked than you already are.

You look at his face, hovering right above you, a crease between his eyebrows and a thin layer of sweat from the endless thrust he does against you.

He groans with his eyes screwed shut that he slows down his pace, almost losing it at how good it feels being inside you even though it's not the first time he did it with you.

"You're so good, love," he says to you.

"I love you so much," his voice quivers with the emotions the words carry in them.

And you can feel it too without he needs to say a word.

"Hyunjin?" you called him.

"Yes, love?" He asks you with a tender gaze.

"I love you so much," you muttered to him.

A tear rolls down your cheek the second you let the words out.

It's scary saying those words, and you figure because it's true, also because your love for him overpowers the love you have for yourself.

Hyunjin closes his eyes to let the words sink in, then sighs.

"And I promise never doubt your love for me again," you said to him.

"I don't want you to promise me that," he says.

He holds the side of your face with his hand, "I know that I can be difficult to be around with," he says to you, "I can be sensitive and annoying and stupid,"

"But I want you to promise to always stay with me," he begs.

And it's something you want and can provide for him, giving your everything to him, you want to be needed by him as much as you need him.

"I promise," you answered without the slightest of doubt.

Hyunjin sighs in relief, he feels like he has just accomplished something far bigger than his life, that is you.

"I love you so, so much," he says to you, then places a gentle kiss on your lips, tangles his hand in your hair, and deepens the kiss, for he can't get enough of the taste of you.

Hyunjin drags his mouth down your neck, and you turn your head to the side, catching the reflection of yourself on the mirror.

It's fascinating how you see yourself crying a while ago, and now, you see Hyunjin making love to you in the mirror.

Hyunjin angles your head at him to kiss you on the lips, "I love you," he says again with his lips grazing yours as he speaks.

"I love you," you said back with so much confidence in it this time.

You exchange a loving gaze with each other then lean in for a kiss.

Now that you had a taste of how great the pain that comes with your love is, you feel something shift in your relationship, you don't know what it is, but you hope it's something better.

One thing for sure is his kisses taste different.

He tastes so bitter yet so sweet.

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[adonis-koo]

Star Struck

| 2 |

↳ Summary: You’re a creature of habit, you plan everything from each hour to each day, so you can imagine the chaos which ensues after you discover a random guy leaking black goo in a ditch- who just so happens to be an alien.

↳ Pairing: Jungkook/Reader

↳ Genre: lowkey strangers to lovers, alien!jungkook, fluff, smut, 

Word Count: 13k

Tags: tentacle sex im sorry, foreplay, oral (f) but not?? jungkook is technically a virgin by human standards ayyy, penetration, nipple play, over stimulation, double penetration, squirting, sub!jungkook, breath play, spit kink, jungkook can make his own lube??, anal im so sorry, praise kink, they become soul mates on accident oops,

Previous | Next

You didn’t see nor understand what JK was talking about at first, he just fumbled along between alleyways and roads and nobody, or what little people were on the streets didn’t look at you twice given your friend was as tall and broad as he was. Perks of being with a man you guessed. You still didn’t know what he was actually talking about except for the assumption that he had found his...friends…?

Eventually JK had dragged you through a lot of fields which had made you increasingly anxious, what if a kidnapper was out here? True you wouldn’t mind him using his talon like tentacles then but still...You also didn’t want to go to jail for assisting a homicide...Standing in an empty field, at the dead of night, was not what you intended on doing on a friday night.

JK seemed excited though as he bounced, grabbing a hold of you, he pressed his thumb to your forehead, your eyes fluttering shut on instinct from being so close to him suddenly but your brows pinched and an uncomfortable ache throbbed in your head before he released you. Rubbing your head you whined before you looked up again, only jumping with a screech at the...ship...in front of you...which was NOT there a moment ago. 

“Home!” JK announced proudly as he grabbed your hand, tugging you along against your will, was this really...his ship? Oh god what if he was abducting you...You didn’t have time to think as he ushered you inside. It looked small on the outside admittedly but on the inside it was all glossy and clean, a sleek futuristic look dawning the interior.

Futuristic, he was an alien, you weren’t shocked at the assessment but still. This must’ve been the hanger or...living area… or...hell if you knew ship terms, it looked like the dining room but you didn’t expect two others to appear. All of them speaking in that same throaty tongue as he ran to them, embracing them with pure excitement on his face before he pointed to you, a look of pride on his face as he cleared his voice, “Y/n.” He spoke clearly as if introducing you.

 You gave an awkward stiff wave before immediately dropping your arm, you were going to be extremely pissed if this was the LSD trip you thought you were having yesterday. You watched them all speak to one another before the one on the right nodded, saying something before gesturing JK off, who hurriedly ran off leaving you alone....with two aliens…

They both looked at you expectantly as you looked around, “Hi…” You offered an awkward smile, “You guys are terrifying…” Watching the one on the right grab a watering can to pour over a small...purple colored...tree? “You less so…” You turned to the other one, his eyes dark and piercing and wow…if you thought JK was hot you hadn’t even thought about what it would look like to seem someone attractive from his species, “You the most…” You wrapped your arms around yourself uncomfortably. 

“He’s just assessing you, Taehyung’s like that with anyone associated with our Jungkookie.” You nearly wheezed at the sound of the one on the right speaking full...English…he offered a dimpled smile as if anticipating that reaction, “Apologies. I’m Namjoon, I’m sure you’re extremely confused and scared with everything going on.” 

“...You could say that…” Your twisted somewhat painfully as you nodded rapidly, it was midnight and you were in a fucking spaceship, “Ummm, where did JK go…?” 

Namjoon as he called himself suddenly snorted, shaking his head as he sighed, “Told him he should’ve paid more attention in the academy,” He rolled his eyes, “Jungkook,” He emphasised the name, “That’s his full Earth name. He just forgot it because he never pays attention,” He offered a weak smile, “And he’s in the memoir chamber rememorizing English so he can actually speak to you. It’s handy for us Orionian’s in case a situation like this happens and we don’t know archaic languages like English.”

You didn’t understand a word of what he just said, “I’m sorry...I think I’m too dumb to talk to you, honestly…” You felt extremely stupid but much to your surprise Namjoon laughed in delight, as if endured by your words. 

“You humans are pretty humble huh,” He hummed as he continued watering the rest of his  plants, “Anyways, our ship crashed here on Earth on our way to the andromeda galaxy and Jungkook ended up falling out, it was an...extremely rocky crash…” His smile still weak as if a vague memory entered his mind, “You have our utmost thanks for taking him in when he was injured and housing him.” 

“It’s no problem, I would’ve done it for anyone.” You shifted a little, smiling a tiny bit despite still not feeling as comfortable as you wish you could be, it was just difficult to take in everything that was rapidly changing but your words still stood, you would have. Especially for...Jungkook...you lingered on the same, it sounded more fitting for the tall puppy like boy. 

“So what are your intentions with Jungkook?” You jumped at how deep the second voice was...Taehyung if you remembered correctly and he only looked about as hot as he was intimidating, “Why did you take him in if you knew his identity.” 

You flailed a little, intending to speak yet no words came out...you...you hadn’t really thought about it...at all honestly…”I...I ummm...well…” 

“Are you working for them?” Taehyung stepped towards you, his expression becoming cold as you feebly took a step back looking towards the ground and unsure of how to answer or if you’d even given him a satisfying answer. 

“Stop.” The new voice was raspy and low, not too terribly deep, but just enough to sound charming and rather rugged, Jungkook had appeared again only this time, immediately standing defensively in front of you, “She found me and even after finding out about me being an Orionian she didn’t report me to any Earth officials. I trust her, and you should too.” 

He...he could speak...perfect English now...What!? 

Taehyung’s eyes narrowed onto you, still distrustful but he laid off, “Right...and what is this about you bonding with her? I don’t think she’d be a good vessel.” 

Jungkook’s jaw twitched and you could see the glow of the crescents on his hand burning in red, “Well I’m not asking for your permission to bond with her.” He spat back, his brows furrowed and his lip twitching in anger, suddenly he didn’t look so cute and puppy like anymore, “And it’s not like we’re getting off Earth anytime soon with the ship in this state, so it’s best if we just resume the plan as originally intended.” 

“You think I’d choose a vessel as inferior as humans to have my offspring?” Taehyung’s face curled as if that was the biggest insult he had ever heard and yet you nearly choked at his words, vessel? Offspring? Uh what? 

“Stop fighting,” Namjoon sighed and much to your surprise both of the two boys quieted down, Jungkook still stood in front of you, shuffling a little closer as Namjoon sighed, “Jungkook is right…” He made a noise of victory as Taehyung’s mouth twitched in anger, the marks along his body burning a deep red that was just a little scary to watch from afar, “With the technology at hand here on Earth and with Arbitrators searching for us, it’s in our best interest to make the most of what we have here. Besides, Earth is unsuspecting and was one of our forerunner’s best creations. It’s not too far off irony to let them be the vessel of our offspring.” 

You stared up at Jungkook’s broad back in disbelief...this man was trying to impregnate you after a half a day of knowing you!? You weren’t sure plan B was prepared for this shit. Jungkook looked deeply satisfied at Taehyung’s reaction though before he turned to you, his expression soft and puppy-like as he smiled somewhat timidly before speaking as if he was a little giddy, “Hi…” 

You could’ve said anything in this moment, in which Jungkook looked like he had been excitedly waiting for, and yet your choice of words had been admittedly poor.

“You’re gonna have to bag another bitch, I don’t do kids! I...I did NOT sign up for this!” You immediately backed away from him like he was poison and you didn’t know how these fuckers procreated and at this point you weren’t sure you wanted to learn!

Jungkook’s lips parted and he looked a little hurt before he quickly approached you again, “I don’t expect you to want to carry my children yet….” 

“Yet!?” You shouted out making all three of them flinch a little, “I...I just let you stay at my place because you looked like you were dying in a ditch, and now! I’m in a spaceship, I can’t find the exit and you can suddenly speak English and you’re talking about kids!? This...nu-uh this is going way too fast. I...I really need to get home.” 

Jungkook’s lips trembled a little as he reached out for you, “I’ll take you back! Or-! Or you could stay here until the morning, you shouldn’t be out alone, Earth has proved to be unsafe at night.” He tenderly held your forearms as your expression awkwardly twisted. 

“Nothing worse could happen to me than what happened earlier tonight,” You shook your head rapidly as you sighed, “Just show me the exit, I’ll be fine, really. I’m happy for you! Seriously! I mean it looks like you’re reunited with your kin so there’s no reason for us to stay in contact and it’s been fun and out of this world- literally.” You laughed a little as you rambled, all three staring at you wide eyed, “But like, seriously I’ll keep this to myself and just hope it’s a really shitty drug trip like I originally thought it was…”

Jungkook sighed, lowering his head in defeat and his lips trembled a little in that sulky way it had been this morning as he went to the hatch where you both had come in, dialing a few buttons he waited a moment as he mumbled, “I just want to explain everything to you, I owe you that, at least…” 

You said nothing waiting for the door to open as he dialed a few other buttons, and a few more, and again...and again…”Um,” He cleared his throat a little, “Namjoon…? The door?” He asked, his eyes doe like as he stared at his companion who sighed, squeezing between you both as he also dialed a few numbers into the glowing pad. 

They both waited before Namjoon’s lips twisted into a sigh as if somehow expecting this to happen before he spoke, “Doors’ jammed...again…”

“This is fucking perfect.” Taehyung swore with a sigh, gritting his teeth as his eyes glared into you briefly, causing you to sheepishly back a little towards Jungkook, “I’m going back to my pod, I can’t deal with this.” He brooded before leaving as you looked between both aliens. 

“...Jammed? The door? As in…?” 

Jungkook’s lips twisted into a nervous smile, his marks glowing a light purple as he coughed, “Looks like we’ll have plenty of time to talk now…” Fuck! Why did things have to be this complicated, it could have been worse, but it was the same annoyance you had when Youtube played an unskippable ad, or when the lead in your pencil broke, a cookie falling onto the floor, that type of inconvenience.

Unshockingly Jungkook didn’t hold the same feeling as he spoke gently, “I can show you to my pod, it’ll be awhile before the door gets fixed…” He gave you an endearing apologetic smile. 

“...As long as you aren’t gonna try to knock me up then sure.” You stared at him in disdain, making him weakly smile as he stepped back up the metal stairs and if you didn’t know any better you would’ve assumed he was actually happy you were stuck with no other choice but to stay. 

“Once you see her to your pod, a word please Jungkook...” Namjoon’s gaze was fixed on the door quizzically as if already trying to deduce what had made it jammed, he made no effort to look back at you both but you could tell it was probably important. 

Jungkook only nodded eagerly and kept your hand in his as he lead you down the small the hallway, lights flickering and while you were anything but an engineer or mechanic, it wasn’t hard to tell they had crash landed, Jungkook ignored the mess against the walls as he typed in something before a door slid open revealing what you assumed was his room, the door slid shut behind you making you jump a little as you investigated the space. It was a minimalistic room, a few trinkets laid around and a messy bed was against the wall.

“You can sleep if you want...I know you were tired when I woke you up…” Jungkook’s marks glowed a soft pink as he bashfully looked at the ground, scratching his cheek as if he didn’t know what to say, “I um...I should go speak to my brother.” 

Before you could even say anything Jungkook had already left looking somewhat sheepish, leaving you to curiously look around the room, it was spacious and in tones of deep brown and black, a few gadgets laying around on his nightstand as you tilted your head. 

His pod...so basically...a bedroom. You assumed as much as you couldn’t really make a distinct difference between the two. True you could’ve slept like he had suggested, you were exhausted but too wired to even think about sleeping at the moment due to how bizarre of circumstances you were in. You were in an alien’s bedroom, on a space ship...

You had took your time browsing around the room, curiously holding a few trinkets in an attempt to figure out what they were, time passed slowly and for a while, you began to wonder if this was just a set up for them to butt probe you like Jimin had original thought they would. Not that you would mind as much as him but- besides the point, the longer you were left with your thoughts, the more that piled up.

When the door abruptly opened you nearly jumped out of your skin, hurriedly setting down what looked like a portable flame thrower before whirling around, Jungkook looked a little timid as he smiled, “I’m sorry that took so long...Um...” He closed the door gently before he gestured, “Please, go ahead and rest, from my understanding...um...humans have a standard sleep cycle yes?” 

You didn’t fully understand what he was asking besides if you slept at night, rubbing your neck you did as he gestured, taking a seat on the bed before you jumped a little as it did not feel like a normal bed, “Uh I guess...? Why...why didn’t you just leave? You...didn’t have to wake me.” You mumbled, scooping your feet up as you laid down, shifting a little as you tried to get comfortable.

The bed felt almost like a marshmallow, something in between water and memory foam as the bed moved in slow, lapping waves as you attempted to get comfortable again with a pout tugging on your lips. 

Jungkook watched you with endearment before he laid on the bed next to you, “You have to stop moving, coranium matches the pattern of your body to keep everything aligned and slowly adjusts to the movement of your body throughout your sleep duration.” 

You rolled onto your side to look at him as you curled up a little, his marks still a light pink and his smile a little shy as he spoke, “To answer your question I mean...I feel like it should be obvious, I want to make my bond with you so it was natural I wanted to take you with me. I don’t know Earth well enough to confidently navigate it on my own without getting lost. I couldn’t risk leaving you and then being unable to find my way back. As well as I knew I’d be able to learn English fast in the memoir chamber, so then we’d be able to talk…” he smiled a bit timidly, his eyes fondly washing over your face as you awkwardly scooted a little away from him. 

His eyes downcasting a little at the gesture as he frowned, and once again, even despite speaking english now it didn’t help his case in looking like a kicked puppy, “Well...am I supposed to know what a memoir chamber is? And….bonding and...literally everything you guys have said thus far?” 

Jungkook rested his chin on his hands as he hummed, thinking about your words carefully before he spoke, “The memoir chamber is in most Orionian ships, it helps us adapt to the planet around us and depending on what region we’re in, the language. Our kind carry human DNA- or...moreso the other way around, so inherently we know all Earth languages as they descended from Orionian dialect, but…” He scratched his cheek, marks glowing pink once more, “I had a difficult time studying earth languages in the academy. It’s unrealistic for us to know them all, so the Memoir serves as a rebrief to put in the language back into our minds.” 

God what were you in now? A shitty sy-fy film? You rolled onto your back as you said no more, thinking about his answer for a good long minute before you parted your lips only to shut them...Hold on one damn minute- did he just insinuate his kind created humans? Knowing all languages? What!? “I don’t even know how to unpack that sentence…” You muttered, staring up at the ceiling which twinkled in a galaxy of constellations and if you didn’t know any better you would’ve assumed it was an open glass ceiling to outer space.

It aligned with nebula’s and stars, planets for what looked like miles and miles. You could stare at it for hours in awe, how did you not notice that until now.

“I could only imagine being human, it’s a lot to take in,” Jungkook offered a gentle smile, “As for bonding…” He was pink all over as he scratched his cheek again, eyes fluttering away from yours almost shyly, “It’s what it sounds like, when we Orionian’s find a person who we like and want to share our life with, we begin a bond, and it takes awhile for the bond to grow but once it’s finished, we’d complete it with a mating cycle, and then...We’re celestially bond together.” He mumbled a little shyly, his eyes looked like stars twinkling as he talked about it, almost in a dreamy fashion. 

“....” You couldn’t even find the words to say anything before you muttered, “You’ve known me for a day…” True Jungkook was cute, but all of this stuff about bonding and space really made it difficult to grasp the concept in a way which wasn’t him basically proposing to you.

Jungkook looked as if he had been abruptly pulled from his little fantasy world as he frowned, propping himself on his forearm as he spoke, “Time is only a concept for Orionian’s, when we know who our bond is meant for, we just know. It doesn’t matter if I’ve known you a day or your whole life, my feelings won’t change. I want us to bond.” His voice lowered a little, his eyes doe-like and filled with a sugary sweetness as he closed the gap between you both. 

You were speechless. Many times in your life you had felt this way, but genuinely, you had no words. An alien just professed his love to you within twenty four hours of knowing him all because...what…? You fed him twice? Let him sleep in your bed once? What had you possibly done for him to think you could be his...his wife!? 

“I’m not getting married, I- I mean I’m flattered! I am.” You sat up, once again, pulling away from him as he mirrored you, his lips jutting into an almost frustrated pout, “But like...I just turned twenty one this year....I’m hardly a person let alone wife material.”

“Bonding is hardly even close to the equivalent of human marriage,” Jungkook wrinkled his nose, almost a little endeared, he knew little of human marriage from the media he had watched when you weren’t present, and while humans had similar ideas of romance, it was hardly comparable, he spoke gently, “It’s far more special and permanent. Being bonded is…” He closed his eyes, a half dimpled smile on his lips as he hummed, “It’s like feeling like the universe has completely aligned on your behalf, and that the planets and stardust gifted you a celestial mate who would never turn their back on you, who would always dry your tears and heal you when you’re hurt. The bond extends past this lifetime and into the next and so forth.” 

“...You lost me at ‘more’ permanent…” For a woman with a whole baggage load of commitment issues Jungkook was really not selling this idea to you well, “Sorry but I think you got the wrong girl.” You could appreciate the bizarreness of this situation and admittedly you felt like you’d always have a superior ‘main character’ moment story to one up somebody with but this whole business about being stuck with someone for multiple lifetimes and having alien babies was really not something you could follow up with.

Jungkook looked severely hurt which made you do a double take, not quite anticipating such a pitiful reaction as his lips quivering and his eyes even looking somewhat glassy as he spoke, “O-oh...I see…” 

wow way to make you feel like an asshole. He had shuffled a little curling up against himself as if trying to make himself appear small as he looked away from you. Sighing you ran a hand through your hair, well fuck, what did you have to lose at this point in your life?

“...Jesus christ, okay...what...what does...you know…” you coughed a little, rubbing your neck as Jungkook’s doe eyes looked at you timidly before darting away when you met his gaze, “What does this bonding shit entail anyway?” 

Jungkook was incredibly attractive, there was no denying it and the worst that could happen would be things didn’t work and you just went back to normal non-tentacle men. Jungkook perked a little at your question, still seeming a bit reserved as he mumbled, “Well...bonding is a long process...it’s not something out of human fiction that just immediately happens. When a bond is first created it’s incredibly delicate, you have to be careful and make sure both partners dedicate time to strengthening the bond.”

Laying your head against your arms that were folded in front of you while listening intently you hummed, “And let’s say hypothetically, could the bond be broken?” 

Jungkook’s expression crumpled a little as he mumbled, “It can be severed, but the more strengthened the bond is, the more painful it’ll be for both partners. But yes, it is possible. I should also mention a bond is only possible unless both partners are in agreement and want it just as much as the other.” 

You hummed, thinking about his words, so technically it wasn’t really possible given both of you had different alignments right now, “Alright well, here on Earth we call it dating, which is a lot less intensive than that, so if you want me to do that then you’re gonna have to go by human standards first.” It was reasonable enough and a happy compromise.

You wouldn’t deny you felt a pull towards Jungkook, ever since he had arrived yesterday morning your life had been anything but normal and yet you embraced every twist and turn so far and...there was admittedly a secret giddy part of you that revelled in old childhood nostalgia that someone had actually fallen from the sky and would now show you a world of many possibilities outside of earth. 

The only thing holding you back was the logic and reason that your family held and pushed onto you at a young age, long gone were the days of staring up at the stars in hopes of seeing something supernatural and daydreaming during recess about being whisked off earth. You didn’t know how to connect with that childlike side of yourself anymore, it had been so long since you bothered with those thoughts that now that the opportunity was presented to you, you genuinely didn’t know how to react.

Jungkook had immediately perked up his brows raised and immediate interest in his expression, “I’ll do it! If it means winning your affection,” his smile was a little toothy and innocent as he spoke, “How do humans date? What do they do?” He tilted his head in curiosity while waiting excitedly for your reply.

You couldn’t help but smile a little at how enthusiastic he was, “Well…” you drew a breath in thought, “It’s not too different then it is from now, we’ll go out to eat together, get to know each other, stuff like that.” 

Jungkook deflated a little, confusion in his eyes as he frowned, “But that’s stuff we do now...as...friends…” his frown furthered on his lips, “What sets friends and dating apart if we do the same thing…?” 

You rubbed your neck, beginning to get a little flustered at his question as you shifted a little, mumbling, “Well the difference is friends are strictly platonic, dating someone means you’re interested in them romantically and...you know...we hold hands...or cuddle or...I don’t know romantic shit…Stuff friends don’t do.” 

When did Jungkook get closer to you? His head tilted in curiosity as he spoke, “...And? Is that it? I’m sorry,” he apologized a bit bashfully, looking rather pink, “I’m trying to discern possible differences in boundaries set between a regular human relationship compared to Orionian’s…I don’t want to do anything that might make you...uncomfortable…” 

You stared at him for a good moment, as if trying to discern whatever he was trying to say without actually saying it, “Well...I’m not sure how different it can be…” Jungkook said nothing, fidgeting a little as you looked at him for a long moment, “...I’d tell you if you made me uncomfortable.” Was this...going where you thought it was going? 

Jungkook shuffled a little closer, his nose nearly brushing yours and his lips that looked so soft jutted into a slight pout, his eyes could hardly meet yours as he timidly asked, “...How...intimate are humans in their relationships?” 

Your face felt like it was on fire though as you muttered with raised brows, “Uh pretty hands on...if you wanna fuck me you can just ask.” You looked up at him, feeling a bit bold given he was a little more on the shy side, you could tell just him asking that had obviously taken a lot of courage on his part.

Jungkook’s marks had suddenly filtered from baby pink to a deep maroon, his face looked nothing except shy and a bit hazy as he mumbled, “Would you let me…? I don’t...exactly share the same anatomy as your male counterpart...Orionian’s...intimacy looks a bit different.” 

You felt intrigued and horny at the same time, it was tentacles wasn’t it? Please god let it be the tentacles, “You can’t threaten me with a good time,” you laughed a little, trying to take a little bit of the nervous edge off Jungkook as you offered a small smile, “Just show me, I’m...what other humans would consider pretty kinky. Doubt it’ll scare me off.” You couldn’t admit that his tentacles were immediately making your panties soaked because god did you want to be filled up like a scared hentai girl right now.

You squeaked at Jungkook suddenly climbing on top of you, his eyes hazy and he pulled the sweatshirt over his head, revealing the strip of glowing maroon that led up the center of his arms and wrapped over his shoulders, his tentacles suddenly emerging from his back much to your horny excitement, “Our tendons are both are strongest and weakest point of our body.” Jungkook mumbled against your neck, the feeling of something extremely foreign wrapping around your thigh, almost something between like a soft silicon and jello substance. 

Not sticky like you had anticipated, but soft enough that it could be almost considered wet, “They protect us but they’re also what we use to procreate with, if they’re cut off or majorly damaged, we become sterilized. My eggs…” He suddenly became a bit timid as he mumbled, “They aren’t fertile yet...But regardless I wouldn’t fill you unless we were bonded, so you won’t have to worry about impregnation. Intimacy is still an act of strengthening a bond though, so it’s utilized a lot at the beginning of an Orionian relationship.”

You weren’t fully paying attention at this point, too busy nearly drooling at the feeling of his tendon slithering along your clothes, “I can understand if you’d prefer to not do this though.” Jungkook seemed somewhat embarrassed and timid, his tendons slithering around your pajama band but doing nothing further.

“No!” He nearly jumped  at how you almost yelled it, your eyes frantic and you were nearly dripping at how horny you were, your voice needy as you whined, “I’m literally a slut Jungkook, I’m more than happy to experiment.” 

Jungkook didn’t need anymore confirmation then just that, his tentacle that had been playing with the band of your pajamas immediately pushing underneath it as you whined, your legs immediately parting for it as it ran up your panties, the soft wetness that ebbed from it soaking whatever was dry of your panties, was this arousal of his own? He moaned softly as he pressed his face into your neck, “I know you feel this is fast, but Orionian’s tend to not like to waste time.” His tentacles slid along your panties before pushing inside the band.

Your lips parted at the soft wet sensation of it gently prodding along your clit in exploration making a yelp escape you.

Jungkook jolted a little in concern as he looked down at you, somewhat shyly and his cheeks were a deep maroon much like his marks, “Keep…! Fuck!” You whined at the way his tentacles as if testingly flicked along your clit, another tentacle which had been floating behind him absently had suddenly emerged forward, making quick work of your pajamas and panties as the other continued working along your clit making you whimper as your back arched a little. 

The second tendon slowly brushed along your soaked cunt, embarrassingly wet sounds could be heard throughout the room as Jungkook moaned in contentment, “This feels so nice,” he mumbled with a whine, the second tentacle which had been stroking you slowly wiggled against your entrance making you squeak. Your horniness couldn’t be put into words at how bad you wanted this man to shove all tentacles inside you.

Your lips immediately parting at the tip of the tentacle pushing inside you, it was too soft to be considered that of a toy or dildo but too firm to be anything foreign, you couldn’t resist propping yourself up onto your elbows, your legs spread as you looked down, your face twisting and cheeks throbbing at the lewd sight of two tentacles hard at work on your cunt, one continuously flicking your clit and rubbing along it while the other began to testingly thrust inside you. 

Your lips dropped open as you moaned feeling Jungkook push it further and further inside you before giving it a testing wiggle, a scream nearly ripped from your throat at how it hit all the right spots.

Unable to even support yourself as you dropped back down with a whine as Jungkook quickly began to pick up the pace even more, “Fuck,” he moaned softly, the tentacle pulsed and throbbed as it squished and wiggled while being thrusted back and forth in short motions, your cunt was so tight and your walls kept trapping him further and further inside you as you whined, “Mm, females of my kind don’t have anything like this,” he moaned two more tentacles had suddenly appeared from his back, one pinning your wrists above your head and the other wandering to your flimsy shirt before pushing underneath it, and much to his delight Jungkook found nothing underneath except your soft breasts, “Nothing this- mmm, fuck,” it came out more of a whine this time as you felt his tentacles wiggling in delight at the way your cunt clenched around him, “small, and warm...Fuck,” Jungkook dipped his head, running a hand through his hair, the third tendon wrapped around your nipple making you whimper, jolting as your cunt squeezed around the tentacle that was beginning to roughly split apart your walls as it discovered your g-spot, your mouth parting as whined spilled from your lips at the insane feeling of the tip of his tentacles flicking up against it rapidly.

“Ah! Fuck fuck fuck, Jungkook!” You whined as your back arched, your eyes nearly rolling to the back of your head at how many sensations were going on, between him finding the sweet spot of your clit, the tip of his tentacle flicking up into your g-spot the other one squeezing with just the right amount of pressure on your nipple. 

Jungkook’s lips parted and his eyes were hazy but in awe at the way your body contorted, your small little walls nearly entrapping his tentacle as you came harshly, whined and whimpers escaping you as he forcefully kept flicking up into your g-spot, his other rubbing gently against your clit as your body frantically moved, yet your hips kept thrusting up to try and take more of his tendon as you whined, “Fuck…! Jungkook! Ah..!” Jungkook moaned softly as he gave you just what you wanted, pushing himself further inside you until he was dangerously close to your cervix.

His tentacle was soft enough that no pain was even involved as he kept wiggling it into you, soundless moans escaped you as your cunt began wrapping convulsing around him, your clit burning in pleasure due to sensitivity as he kept letting the soft tendon rub against the tender bud.

“Fuck!” You whined, liquid suddenly spewing from your cunt much to Jungkook’s surprise, his tentacle had immediately restricted at the feeling leaving your cunt feeling empty and tears nearly escaping yours eyes in frustration due to it despite his second tendon continually abusing your clits sweet spot, within the second the first tentacle entered your once more pushing with no hesitation right back to its original position as Jungkook began wiggling once again with short thrusts. 

Your walls kept squeezing around him causing him to moan as he whined, “You- you need to stop doing that...feels too good.” He mumbled shyly against your skin as you nearly convulsed in pleasure at the way his third tendon was wrapped around your nipple, giving the bit of pressure that had your cunt squeezing around his tentacle, too busy in your own pleasure to care about what he wanted, your hand wrapped around his throat making his eyes widen and his lips part submissively, “I’m gonna keep doing what I want baby- fuck...I think you like it when my little cunt squeezes around it.” You purposely clenched around his tentacle and you could physically feel it throb inside you.

Jungkook’s lips trembled a little a moan escaped him at your hand squeezing lightly around his throat his tentacle immediately fucking you even faster in comply as your lips parted in glee, your hips rolling a little to slide along the slick thick tendon, “Thats right baby boy, I bet you’ve never felt a cunt like this before huh?” You let out a shaky cackle as your hand sadistically squeezed harder around his neck. 

His gaze dropped and he only whined, quickly crumbling to your dominant hands that only excited you further, it was one thing to cross off your bucket list getting fucked by an alien, it was two being able to dom one, “Oh am I suddenly in control now?” You mockingly pouted before a twisted smirk curled on your face at how Jungkook wouldn’t meet your eyes any longer.

Power was practically leaking in your veins, you were getting fucked by a tentacle alien and he was a shy little sub? Your squeezed harsher around his neck, a whiney moan suddenly escaping him as his tentacle harshly pulsed inside you before it frozen, his face buried into your neck, impatient and now knowing you could boss him around freely your hips lifted, squelching and slipping around the tendon with ease as his lips trembled against your neck, “Mmm! P-please! You have to slow down…” he whimpered a little at how cruel you were being with him. 

You could care less in this moment though, too busy living out your dream fantasy bucking your hips against the soft subtle material, your cunt squeezing around him as you moaned softly.

Your moan twisted to a growl at the feeling of his tentacle pausing in your clit, your hand finding his hair as you harshly balled it into your hand, “I didn’t give you permission to stop.” Jungkook’s gaze lowered and his eyes a little watery despite the angry pout on his face.

“You aren’t listening to me.” He mumbled stubbornly and your lips twitched, outwardly showing displeasure but inwardly seeking the chase he was trying to give. Jungkook fumbled with you had pushed away, briefly his tendons pulled away in semi surprise, at first assuming you had taken his shy words the wrong way but he was quickly mistaken when he was shoved onto the bed, a whine escaping him as the tentacles quickly adjusted to be semi flattened. His lips were quivering at the sight of your naked body straddling him and your hand on his jaw, “Truthfully, I don’t think you want me to listen baby.” You pouted mockingly, the feeling of his stretched tentacles seekingly wrapping around your thighs, “Open.” 

Jungkook’s lips parted a little, his eyes watering and looking a little confused at your words, but you had took advantage of the opportunity, spitting into his mouth as he suddenly whined, his ears bright red following along with the magenta color coursing through his body as your hand wrapped around his throat in a firm grip, “Good boy.” You smiled loosely, wiping a stray bit of saliva from his lip as he whined, a tentacle beginning to stroke against your soaked cunt once more but this time he did nothing except in hopes of an invitation.

“Such a good boy, go on, I know you want to.” You cooed out, your head hanging a little and your lips parting at the feeling of the tentacle plunging back inside your warm walls with a loud squelch, “Stay still.” You commanded sharply and with a noisy whine from Jungkook as he obediently listened, you could feel the foreign tendon inside you pulsing still as if it nearly killed him to do so. Your hips steadily began to move along the tentacle, your cunt clenching around it as you took more of him it only got fatter and thicker the more you took. 

“Ahh, fuck. That’s it baby, c’mon keep filling me up. I know you want to. I can see it in your face.” You taunted, feeling his tentacle doing a test wiggle inside you as you slid along it, arousal coating him as he whined, you had a great view of his other tentacles sliding from under his back and extending upward, the second quickly made way for your clit much to your excitement, your lips parted and a whine escaping you as it kept rubbing into your sweet spot it had previously discovered. 

You were too busy trembling and moaning, attempting to fight off another orgasm at the feeling of your clit almost feeling like it was being ate out at how soft the tip of his tentacle was gently lapping against it and a soft wet arousal of his own leaking from the tip, you had bounced against his tendon in short motions, craving all of him inside you as your body began to convulse, your hands balling against his chest with a whine at how difficult it was to stop yourself from cumming immediately.

Jungkook wasn’t letting go without a fight though, a third tentacle had surprised you, pushing between the cheeks of your ass making you nearly gasp a whine, “Fuck! Fuck, please.” You mumbled in a moment of weakness, giving your consent that you’d like to trust he’d be able to make this feel good. Jungkook didn’t hesitate for a second, the tentacle oozed a slippery liquid, his own arousal along your puckered rim. You were almost too fucked out to even pay attention, your body busy still riding him and trying to focus on anything but the feeling of the slippery tentacle flicking at your clit and finding nearly every pleasurable nerve physically possible. 

It was difficult to miss the third one pushing slowly into your ass as your lips jumbled something nearly incomprehensible, your body collapsing semi against him, only being held up by your weak forearms, “Mmph! Fuck baby keep going, just like that. Such a good boy for me.” 

Jungkook squeaked out what sounded like a pleasant noise at the praise, perhaps sensing your body beginning to crumble as his tentacles took back over, quickly thrusting inside you once more and wiggling to his heart's pleasure as drool nearly dropped from your lips. Unable to even do anything or say anything with two tentacles plunged inside you. 

The tip of the tentacle was just narrow enough to slip inside your ass with a gentle sting but pleasurable enough to make your toes curl and whines escape you at the feeling of the force of his thrusts on either side of your body. His second was still lapping up around your clit, finding that perfect spot that nearly made your vision go white and you weren’t sure what escaped your throat other than possibly the best orgasm you would ever experience in your life. 

And it didn’t stop after a second, it just kept going with his tentacles drilling inside you and lapping around your delicate hyper sensitive clit as you whined and cried against him. Jungkook moaned softly as you felt what potentially might have been a second tentacle greedily pushing inside your cunt, whimpers escaping you at how harshly he was thrusting up inside you and how stretched your body was. 

Your mouth parting at the feeling of the forth tentacle pushing its way to meet the first as you squeaked and whined against him, a tentacle wrapping around your waist to hold up your lower body that nearly collapsed as your vision blurred with tears at how hard you were being fucked. Jungkook’s eyes were shut tightly and his hands had finally grabbed your waist as extra support as his third tentacle wiggled its way further into your ass. The pleasurable sting becoming more and more noticeable as you cried out at the feeling of one tentacle flicking up against your g-spot and the other harshly thrusting into you while your clit was hypersensitive at the feeling of being rubbed and flicked. 

Your last orgasm couldn’t even compete with this one as you cried out, body convulsing and cunt tightening as you nearly scrambled almost looking possessed to the unknown eye, your body had clenched up so hard at being so filled you hadn’t even heard the sharp whine from Jungkook. Hot liquid suddenly spurted everywhere the majority of it inside you but some getting on you, over the bed, everywhere. 

Jungkook whimpered and whined, digging his face into your neck and his tentacles were pulsing sharply as if literally pumping out every drop of liquid they could inside you. You were so fucked out you could hardly even ask what in the actual hell he just injected inside you. You had already been tired before but your body was burning and aching, feeling as if you had literally been ripped to pieces. 

At least you finally got a piece of that tentacle action.

You were not someone that fucked and then immediately slept afterwards, typically after a one night stand, depending on your relation with the person you would either ghost them by pretending to go to the bathroom, talk and hang out afterwards, or go get something to eat together, or by yourself, you weren’t picky.

Rubbing your blurry eyes you yawned, your body aching with even the slightest movement, Jungkook was the first man who had ever fucked you so hard, you had little to no choice but to fall asleep afterwards, you probably couldn’t even stand if you wanted too. He was curled up against your chest at the moment, his head pressed into your breasts looking way too content at the moment. 

Your eyes trailed down at his fluffy raven hair before down the warm tawny skin of his back, something in your chest stirring, it felt like it was almost physically tugging you closer to his body, your hand finding its way to his hair making him stir a little. Jungkook’s arms wiggled against your waist to make himself comfortable once more before relaxed with a content sigh. 

The marks on his back glowed a sentient purple, you had never gotten a good look at his back before. 

And while this wasn’t that great of a position to view, you were still curious with what you could see, they formed two long strips down his back widening a fair bit and they stopped just at the smallest part of his waist. If you didn’t know any better you would’ve remarked that it looked like he had wings ripped from his back.

As morbid as it sounded, and that is of course if they glowed like this. Jungkook really was the prettiest thing you had ever seen, your hand hadn’t even meant to pull from his hair down his neck, you couldn’t help the tug in your chest wanting to touch.

However the moment your fingers grazed over the mark that covered his left shoulder blade Jungkook nearly flew out of your arms making you jolt in just as much surprise as him, his lips parted and he had sat up, gaze sharp as he looked around as if for any possible intruders. Slowly as he woke up though he came to the realization it was just you and him, your smile becoming somewhat sheepish as you mumbled, “Um, sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you.” You cleared your throat feeling bad now, was it just that sensitive? You might not know much about Orionian’s but you could take a guess and assume that was the opening to where his tentacles laid dormant, and given they were also how they procreated...It was natural Jungkook was probably a little defensive about them being touched. 

Jungkook said nothing though, only staring at you for a long moment before he whined a little, suddenly crawling back up to you before collapsing on top of you as you huffed, “You can’t startle me like that, my scaling is sensitive.” He mumbled a little shy, grabbing your hand as he placed it back on top of his head obviously wanting affection. 

Your fingers dug back into his scalp making a pleasant noise escape him as his body relaxed once more, “...Scaling?” Your brows furrowed at his words, complying with his silent demand to have his hair played with as he curled up against you, his lips tugged into a smile as he rested his face between your breast. 

“Yeah, my scales.” Jungkook nodded as he held up his arm, pointing at the glowing marks making you frown, that...looked nothing like scales....Jungkook smiled a little as he rested back down while explaining, “There filled with hyper plasma so depending on the hormonal chemistry of my body will change colors.” You got that part, even before he could speak English, but still...when you thought of scales, you thought of stuff like fish and...scaly things. Not aliens. 

Jungkook only smiled happily as he looked up at you, it looked like thousands of stars twinkling in his eyes and the dim lights reflected off his iridescent skin, little tones of purple and blue could be spotted as he lifted his hand up to cup your cheek, his fingers carefully trailing down your jawline. There was a wave in your chest, something strong like...the only thing you could describe was pure happiness, “Hey what did you blow inside?” You hadn’t even meant to ask that question but it had abruptly crossed your mind. 

Jungkook’s gaze faltered a little, his scales suddenly turning bright pink and his bashfully lowered his gaze, pressing his cheek on your chest as he mumbled, “It was just plasma, it’s what helps carry eggs when they’re released but...I already told you...my eggs aren’t ready yet. You have no possible chance of getting pregnant without my prior knowledge.” 

His fingers tethered against your stomach as if saddened at the idea that his future kin weren’t in your stomach, a wave of sadness fleeting inside your chest briefly as you frowned, why did you feel so odd? You weren’t even the least bit sad about not being pregnant. 

“Okay...good I was just..wondering since…” You coughed a little, not finishing your sentence which you were originally going to say because he used you like an actual cum dump- not that you minded. But still. It was good to know. Jungkook said no more, only burying into your chest with a pouty whine. 

Yawning you stretched out looking around before grabbing your phone which had somehow made it alive on your night stand, your notifications flooded with Jimin’s drunk texting on where you went last night and why you weren’t home...Wait, your eyes darted to the time, it was noon?! You had a lecture in half an hour! 

“Fuck! I have to get to class!” You immediately jolted up making Jungkook whine as he was jostled onto the bed as you limped along in search of your clothes, your body aching and resisting with each fumble before you nearly collapsed out of fatigue while grabbing your panties. 

“Can’t you just stay? Just for a little longer?” Jungkook mumbled, his lips in a large puppy like pout as he held out his hand to you, something stirring in your chest that wanted to just curl back up against him, his eyes doe like and soft, almost pleading for you to cuddle back up against him. 

“I have midterms coming up Jungkook, I really can’t afford to skip class.” You offered an apologetic smile, “Besides it’s not like we can’t go get something to eat later or anything.” Pulling your pants up you wobbled to the door, frowning as you pulled your sweatshirt back over your head, where was the door handle…?

“..B-but!” Jungkook fumbled as he pulled his shirt over his head before hurrying over to you, “Just five more minutes? Or two? Please…!” There was something urgent in his voice as his lips trembled as if he would be devastated if you left. 

Examining the door your lips parted as you pushed the button on the wall, jolting a little as the door slid open, “Jungkook,” You paused briefly, feeling a dull ache in your chest, a brief desire to do as pleaded as you looked up at him, “I really have to go to class okay? I’ll drop by later when I’m finished for the day I’m sure you...have stuff you need to talk about with your...um...kin…” You raised your brow a little awkwardly before you back walking down the hallway, something inside the back of your head almost tempted to stay with him. 

He looked so panicked and whiny, it made you feel bad for having to go, and furthermore you secretly wished you could stay longer but you couldn’t afford to miss class with midterms so close. 

If your memory was correct this should lead to…! Aha, you felt victorious at the sight of the main, living area?  The circular table was towards the smaller three step ledge that went up into the control room and the purple bonsai-like plant which had just been freshly pruned sat delicately on the other side of the room. 

“No! I....Can I come with you then? And then we can come back here together later?” Jungkook pleaded, his lips trembling and his eyes almost watery as you paused with a sigh, he was really tugging on your heart strings huh...It was almost easier to deny him back when he was unable to actually speak his wants to you. 

“Jungkook I- I mean I guess you could…? But like, it’s just lecture, it’s boring, I have to be focused the whole time and no offense but...I feel like if you came I wouldn’t focus.” You pulled a little away from him with an awkward smile while silently hoping the door had been fixed. 

“Morning you two,” You turned around at the sight of Namjoon appearing from the large opening of the control room Taehyung who still looked sour following after him only to lean against the wall with crossed arms, Namjoon stepped down the three steps as he offered a polite smile, “I hope you slept well, I’m sure it’s a lot different compared to human dorms.” 

You looked away from Namjoon unable to speak at the question of having slept well, you hardly slept half the night after getting your back blown out, but he was right, it was nothing like human- in any aspect whatsoever, whether it was the bed or who you got fucked by last night. 

“It was fine...um the door....Is it fixed?” You pointed your thumb behind your shoulder as you offered a weak smile. 

Namjoon nodded stepping closer before he abruptly paused, his brows furrowing before he looked between you and Jungkook without so much as a word, it made you somewhat self conscious as you shuffled in your spot at nobody volunteering to get the door open, “Yeah, it’s fixed, umm…” His smile was a little tense before he looked between you and Jungkook, “Are you both going out? Already?” 

Jungkook refused to look his elder in the eyes, his lips plush and pouty, hair dusting over his eyes as he shuffled in his spot refusing to answer whatever unasked question his elder had, “Uh yeah, I’m going to class, Jungkook can stay here though, I’ll be back later.” You shrugged, not understanding what their problem was. 

Taehyung had not interjected into the conversation yet, his dark hair brushing over his eyes only in the opposite effect of Jungkook, making him look as if he had a death warrant with your name on it, “And leave Jungkook alone?” He gritted his teeth looking like he was ready to snarl at you, your lips quirked a little and your brow lifted in confusion, wasn’t that typically what people meant when they said they had to leave…? 

“Uh yeah, and I’ll come back…?” You trailed off, making it sound more like a question then a statement before Taehyung suddenly pushed off the wall, his walk was by no means in any hurry, but his shoulders were squared and his steps were paced with determination that had you taking a step back at the sight of him not stopping until he was right in front of you. 

The energy of the room had gone tense before Taehyung snarled, “You bonded with my little brother and now you’re going to leave him!?” 

You shrieked at suddenly being shoved against the wall, your ribs throbbing in pain as Taehyung’s hand wrapped around your throat, crushing your windpipe as you gagged, “Humans really are pathetic selfish people.” Tentacles suddenly wrapped around Taehyung’s hand before he was ripped away from you, hot red scales were a blur as Jungkook stood in front of you protectively. 

Your hands rubbing your sore throat as you leaned against the wall gasping for air, “Stay out of this!” Jungkook growled, his lips twitching and his eyes burning into his brothers, “This doesn’t involve you, let me sort it out and if you ever fucking touch my mate like that again I won’t hesitate to rip your eggs straight out of your utaria.” 

You jolted at the sight of Taehyung lashing out at Jungkook, both of them slamming into the wall near the hallway as they grappled and yet you could only stare in shock at what had just happened and what you had just heard. Namjoon was immediately between them both separating the two as he growled, “Taehyung that wasn’t necessary! I doubt she even realizes what happened!” Namjoon immediately twisted towards Jungkook with a scowl, “And you! What did I tell you last night?” 

Jungkook’s jaw was clenched, his scales a hot burning red that matched Taehyung’s and yet his eyes couldn’t meet Namjoon’s, his lips twitching a little as he glared into the wall, his expression slowly melting as Namjoon snapped, “What did I tell you!? Why can’t you two ever listen for once? If you had we probably wouldn’t even be stuck on Earth right now! This is your mess Jungkook, I told you it wasn’t a good idea to bond this early on in our stay on Earth.” 

Jungkook’s expression had turned neutral but something in his eyes still seemed bitter as he stared at the ground now, perhaps too scared to look up at you, who had backed away from all the men in shock. You...but...Jungkook said…The silence set in and slowly each brother turned their gaze towards you before Jungkook was the last, his face filled with remorse at your expression as your lips parted, “You…! You told me-” Your lips parted variously before you finally forced out a sentence, “You lied to me!” 

“I didn’t!” Jungkook immediately hurried over to you, his expression filled with guilt and desperation, “I- Y/n I wasn’t even aware we had bonded until Taehyung pointed it out! I’m sorry I had no idea I…!” All you heard was excuse after excuse though, something indescribable filled your chest and your vision blurred in anger. 

“I’m going! I can’t…! I can’t even look at you right now Jungkook!” Upset felt like it had magnified tenfold in your chest as you rushed down the metal stairs, punching against the button before the door opened, your throat felt squeezed and like you were suffocating as you ran as far and fast as your legs could take you. What was happening to you? 

“I’m fine…” 

Jimin and Seokjin exchanged glances, light poured in from the opened door behind them of your bedroom, the blanket wrapped around your body has you held it up above your nose, “Uh don’t lie bitch,” Jimin quirked a brow, his lips twitching in anger at just the sight of you trying to tell such an obvious lie, “It’s been three days since...whatever happened with JK- “Jungkook,” “I don’t give a fuck what his name is, you’ve been a recluse ever since, what happened?” 

Just the mention of Jungkook’s name made your chest physically ache as you curled further into yourself, you weren’t in physical pain, you couldn’t even fully describe it. 

All of your feelings just felt so amplified, like they swirled at just the surface of your chest and ready to burst out at any given moment. It felt like a physical string around your heart that squeezed and tugged harder and harder that left you in a depressed state with no energy left to do anything except what you had been doing.

Weakly sleeping half the time or scrolling on your phone in a useless attempt to think about anything other than Jungkook. You couldn’t even understand how you felt so attached to him and how much your body ached to just be wrapped up in his arms, but you were still so upset at what had happened. 

Questions swirled in your mind and to which you didn’t have the answer too and it made you even more upset that you wouldn’t get answers unless you went back, “Y/n, we’re just worried.” Seokjin raised his brows, his expression apprehensive but softened at the weak state you were in, “You haven’t been out of your room ever since the morning after the party. Midterms are just around the corner, I doubt you slack off for a shit reason.” 

You only curled up further before you sighed, closing your eyes as you finally caved in and mumbled an explanation as to what had happened and what you were now suffering under. Seokjin seemed more calm but Jimin’s lips were twitching in anger as he scowled, “You’re joking! Well let’s just go and demand he cut whatever alien ties he has on you.” 

You knew he was just trying to help but you only shook your head, “...Taehyung said I was the one that had apparently formed the bond, I didn’t even know that was possible.” You mumbled, you buried into your pillow, a feeling of guilt building into your chest as you tried to forget the ghost image of Jungkook’s hurt eyes in your mind. 

“Well it’s obviously affecting you mentally and physically, I mean seriously, you haven’t showered in days, you aren’t eating, Y/n…” Seokjin kneeled down, a frown on his face, “You need to swallow your pride, as stubborn as you are, and go talk to Jungkook about this. We’ll come with you, you probably won’t even have the energy to get there, but he’s the only one who can help.”

You managed to roll over to your side, your back facing them both now as you pulled the blanket over your head, you didn’t want to face Jungkook again, you weren’t sure you were ready to. You had so many mixed feelings and you weren’t even sure what to begin on asking questions. 

Neither said anymore before you heard Seokjin reluctantly sigh, “I’ll leave it for tonight, but tomorrow morning you’re giving us directions and we’re going to get this sorted.” They both left shortly after and closed the door sinking the room back into a depth of darkness. A heavy weight back on your chest and sudden ache filling you as you curled up, a dull sense of urgency inside you but you couldn’t distinguish what for. It felt like you needed to cry even despite not feeling sad, but maybe as a way to just release this energy.

But you didn’t do anything besides lay on your back, staring up at the ceiling as you sighed, trying to ignore the dull ache of your head, what a shit show. If you had known what your life would come to by just trying to be a good person, you would’ve left him in that ditch. ----

It felt like your body was being dragged through the mud, through the fire and hell maybe even gitting shit on at this point, “This is so stupid.” You mumbled, curled up in your hoodie as you hugged your knees into your chest in the back of Seokjin’s car. 

“You’re the one that fucked an alien,” Jimin snorted, twisting in his seat as he cocked a brow, “Which, what possessed you to do that seriously? Your stupid little hentai fantasies?” He stared at you with a bizarre expression as you snorted weakly. 

“Yeah pretty much.” 

“Fucking knew it,” Jimin collapsed back in his seat, “We could get our assholes probed by aliens now because she couldn’t keep her panties on at the sight of a slimy tentacle.” He raised his hands dramatically and you could’ve sworn you heard Seokjin try to keep from laughing at you both. 

“They’ll probe you with their tentacles too, apparently they make their own lube home made so they’ll slide it right in no problem.” If you had the energy you would’ve died laughing at the way Jimin whipped around in his seat in horror. 

“No fucking way. You WILLINGLY let him do that to you?” 

You couldn’t stop the weak laugh escaping you as you leaned your head against the window, “I’m a slut.” You shrugged before you lifted your head a little, “Right there! It should be in the field. I think it has some sort of cloaking shield or something.” Seokjin pulled off on the old winding back road which looked familiar enough.

He hadn’t been going fast to begin with and you had already stopped twice and the two other fields had been empty so this one had to be it, and if it wasn’t then it was safe to say you broken Jungkook’s heart right in two and he and his other space fuckboy brothers left Earth for good. Which you hoped not because you felt like you were in a weird limbo between life and death at the moment. 

Stepping out of the car you paused as you heaved a breath, leaning against the car as you sighed, the energy feeling like it had been sucked straight out of your soul every passing minute. Jimin looked at you mildly concerned as you waved him off, slowly pushing yourself straight up as you wrapped your arms around yourself. 

The comforts of your hoodie keep you warm as you ignore the dull ache in your chest, Seokjin and Jimin both kept close as you all looked like idiots wandering around in an empty field. The empty field however, upon stepping forward had suddenly blurred before the familiar sight of the ship came into view. Seokjin and Jimin were dumbfounded at the sight as they both stared. 

You only trudged forward towards the door before you slammed your hand against the metal door, “Well? What are you both doing just standing there?” You asked with a furrowed brow.

“Well sorry I didn’t fuck an alien the first chance I got.” Jimin fumbled out with a huff as he hurried over along with Seokjin. 

The door had immediately been opened to a relieved looking Namjoon, his eyes briefly landing on Jimin and Seokjin warily as he spoke, “I’m glad you came back! Come on, hurry in.” He ushered you in, “...I’m assuming these are your...friends…?” 

“Best friends, roommates, the same guys that also allowed your little space fuckboy to stay with us.” Jimin growled out as he crossed his arms, standing as a big brother you never asked for as Seokjin snorted. 

“Chill,” He shoved Jimin a little who only grumbled under his breath before he spoke, “I’m Seokjin and that’s Jimin, we’re Y/n’s roommates we’re already uh...aware of what you guys are we just...we don’t know what’s going on, we just want Y/n to be okay.” 

Namjoon nodded slowly, still a little wary but it was to be expected, he said no more as he widened the latch for the three of you, “Y/n left right at the beginning stage of their bond when it’s imperative that the newly bonded couple stay together and establish a stable connection. If not, it becomes unstable and drains the life force out of both individuals causing a wide variety of ailments and illnesses to take over. It’s good you guys came back when you did, Jungkook is doing even worse sense he was the Si in the bond.” 

“What is she doing back here?” Your lips twitched a little at the snarl from Taehyung who had shot up from his seat at the table, his eyes glaring holes into you and honestly, if he could vaperize you into dust at the moment you were sure he probably would. 

“Here to break the little probe ass connection your fuckboy put on her,” Jimin snapped back unappreciative at someone talking this way to you especially in the condition you were in right now.

Taehyung’s lip twitched as he shot out of his seat, “My little brother may be naive but he had good intentions and she took advantage of his fragile state! He wasn’t in any sort of headspace to do anything!” You only curled away from Taehyung with mixed feelings, you wouldn’t necessarily describe Jungkook’s state of mind at the time, fragile as it was just horny. 

Namjoon sighed as he looked at Seokjin before at you and then the two feuding men who were practically glaring into one another, “Taehyung, don’t do anything irrational, I’m going to get Jungkook.” Namjoon disappeared and it was quiet inside the ship as a tension took over the room. 

You tried your best to ignore it as you slumped against the wall, listening to the whirling on the interior running. Not a minute later you heard a loud flutter of steps as you looked up, Jungkook’s hair had been ruffled and he had looked extraordinarily tired, his scales however were lit up a sky blue, his lips parted as if trying to figure out if you were real or not before he hurried to you. 

His arms wrapping around you and a small whimper escaping him as his nose rubbed into your neck, your face pressed into his chest with a sigh of relief, the dull ache in your chest fading quickly as you basked in the warmth of Jungkook’s arms. You had hugged many people in your life before and sure it was nice, but you couldn’t even describe the wash of comfort and love that radiated through your entire being at being curled up in this man’s arms. 

Jungkook’s nose nudged at your neck a little and buried himself into your embrace as his fingers fiddled with the thick material of your hoodie, “Jungkook,” Jungkook shuffled a little, his body practically wrapped around you as his eyes slowly looked up from his content figure to meet Namjoon’s gaze, “You both should go lay down and begin to properly set your bond together, I’m sure you’re both exhausted.” 

Jungkook nodded wordlessly, perhaps not trusting himself to speak as he began to lead you towards his pod, “Woah, wait hold on.” Jimin cut in only for a snarl like growl to escape Jungkook, tentacles suddenly shooting from his back protectively pulling towards the front of his body to create a barrier between you and any threat that might take you away from him. 

“Woah holy fuck!” Jimin nearly screeched, holding his hands up and freaking out a little at seeing a killer glare on such an innocent face, “We didn’t come here for this…! What, what do you mean, set a bond? I don’t want Y/n out of our sight…!” 

Jungkook’s lip twitched in annoyance as he set his chin on your shoulder, his arms tightening around your waist and you could see the red glow of his scales slowly deepening further into a dark maroon, he did not look happy. 

Namjoon put up a hand, offering a tense smile, “All that entails is them being together and being close, they need to stabilize their bond. Once it’s set they can figure out whether they want to...bond further or…” Namjoon didn’t finish his sentence, is eyes warily lingering on the younger’s expression which was sharp and annoyed, “...You get the idea, I would advise against stopping him, trying to separate them now when he just got her back….I can’t guarantee I’ll keep you both alive.” 

Jimin and Seokjin shared a wary glance before stepping aside, Jungkook’s gaze broody as he watched them sharply as he trudged you both forward, his tentacles still out and floating behind him now as if ready to strike on contact. The tension didn’t leave until you were back into his pod once more, the room having not been changed except for a lot more clutter accumulation- much like your own room. 

You hadn’t even had the chance to open your mouth before you were suddenly picking up, your legs wrapping around Jungkook as you squirmed, “Jungkook!” You squeaked out, his hands gripping your ass tightly but his face kept nudging into your neck as he whined,  the killer aura he had not seconds ago immediately disappearing, “Don’t ever do that again,” You were nearly crushed when you were dropped onto the bed before Jungkook collapsed on top of you, “Please.” Guilt nearly devoured your heart at the way Jungkook held back a sob, his voice pleading and cracked, “It’s not fair! You-! You can’t just do this to me then leave. Never again.” You felt warm substance dripping onto your skin and your heart was pounding in your chest. 

An innate need coursing through your veins to dry his tears as you did so, “I’m sorry! I’m sorry okay?” You whispered out, your hands cupping his cheeks, that iridescent glow on his skin and his eyes watery and big, “I’m just…! I was just scared, I didn’t know what was going on and I just thought I needed time to think. I had no idea what the effects were and what would happen if I left. I’m not going to leave okay? I won’t leave.” 

Jungkook only closed his eyes, tears falling down his cheeks and you couldn’t help but watch in a melancholy awe at an almost glittery substance filling his tears, making the stains on his skin glisten and glitter under the dark lights of his room, Jungkook said no more, perhaps not trusting himself too and only curled himself further against your as your hands soothingly ran through his hair as his body melted into yours. No words were further spoken between you both as you curled against him once more, your nose burying in his hair with the innate need to comfort him. 

Feelings were too intense and magnified, as if you could feel every speck of hurt and misery Jungkook had suffered without you and despite being cognitively aware you in any other case wouldn’t be like this, you still were. You didn’t understand what happened, or how it happened, but what you did know was that despite all of the uncertainty, Jungkook needed you. 

You weren’t sure how much time had passed, neither of you had talked for what seemed like hours, only staying close in one another's arms, and slow but surely, that unstable feeling in your chest was beginning to fade and was replaced by what you could only describe as a warm, bright thrum.

Both of you were awake, but Jungkook’s eyes looked far away, his face still laid against your chest as you tenderly stroked through his hair, “Jungkook,” He didn’t respond right away, shifting a little before those doe eyes looked up at you, his lips jutted into a soft pout that nearly broke your heart out of guilt, “What....what’s going on? I don’t understand anything.” Your fingers delicately traced his prominent cheekbones, his face immediately nuzzling into your hand as his eyes closed. 

Jungkook’s lips trembled only a little as he mumbled, “...I...I’m not sure...I told you before that in order for a bond to be created it has to be wanted between both parties involved,” His nose nudged your hand as you tenderly thumbed his cheek, “Wh-which means...even if it wasn’t a surface thought you still energetically reached out and initiated the bond making you the Fi and me the Si since I accepted without realizing.” 

His lips went pouty before he pressed his head back against your chest as you stared down at him mildly confused, perhaps realizing this he spoke further, “Fi and Si are considered sacred opposites, in a bond both people take on one or the other, the initiator the Fi and the receiver the Si, it makes sense you didn’t feel as much as I did, the Fi in the bond isn’t affected nearly as heavily as the Si is because you were the one who created the bond.”

You still didn’t quite understand other than this being a Yin and Yang equivalent with a dash of omegaverse on the side, but then again, if humans had descended from Orionian’s then the apple truly didn’t fall too far from the tree. 

“And...the Fi is what…? The more dominant one?” You quirked a brow, a smile threatening to tug on your lips as Jungkook looked up at you, an unfair pout of his face as he set his chin on your chest, leading you to believe there was some merit to your words. 

“Not exactly, it just means you were the one who established the bond, making you the one who, in more primal words, the caretaker. With newly bonded couples, it’s imperative that you be together for the first few days to stabilize the bond. Si tends to be more....” He shifted a little, his scales becoming pink as he buried into your chest, “...Clingy...and Fi tends to facilitate and care for Si while the bond stabilizes.”

Your hand made its way back to his hair as you tenderly combed through the soft silky locks as Jungkook’s relaxed back against you, practically melting into your touch as you hummed, “And...if it isn’t stabilized?” 

Jungkook shifted a little against you as he mumbled, “...Well, both people become....I don’t know how to truly describe, if a bond isn’t stabilized...it becomes difficult to distinguish your own feelings from your partners, and with the bond unstable it causes an emptiness to fill both which causes sadness and pain, but because feelings can be mutually felt, it magnifies those feelings tenfold...Until eventually….” Jungkook frowned as he shrugged a little timidly, “Both go insane, or end up commiting suicide out of despair. Si feels it a lot more intensely then Fi though because of being the one who was tethered into the bond rather than creating it.”

Oh…

You said nothing, feeling even worse now knowing what had happened and what you could have possibly caused, not only this but for Jungkook to suffer through so much all because you couldn’t just hear him out for less than five minutes, “Don’t blame yourself,” Jungkook sat up a little to look at you earnestly, as if knowing exactly what you felt despite not saying anything, “You don’t know anything about Orionian’s, I...I should’ve handled everything better then I did…” His gaze lowered looking a little glassy as he sighed, “Just...please never do that again.” He collapsed back against you with a quiet mumble, “I was miserable.” 

“I won’t baby.” You ushered softly, pressing your lips into his hair as he basked in your love, the silence taking over once more as you relaxed back down against him, intending on letting yourself fall asleep again before you felt a low rumble in your stomach, before you sighed...Well he did say since you were….Fi...that you were supposed to be a caretaker....?

“Hey, I’m starving...you want me to get us something to eat?” You sat up a little as Jungkook shifted beneath you with a whine, his cheeks puffing a little as he huffed, saying nothing but you had a suspicion that he was definitely hungry, “I’m getting us something to eat, what do you want babe?” You got out of bed making Jungkook scramble with another whine. 

He immediately latched himself to you as you sighed, “Then we’re going together. Do you guys even have human food here?” 

“We have plamatic barrettes.” Jungkook perked a little in excitement as you frowned. 

“Can...Are...are they edible for humans?” You raised a brow as you opened the door, doing an awkward waddle as Jungkook back hugged you, happily nuzzling into your neck before he frowned.

“Well...um…” He rubbed his head as you tutted, it wasn’t that you weren’t willing to try it but you were really craving some fries right now and whatever it was they ate, didn’t sound even close to a potato. 

“We can try it later babe, I brought my wallet so we can go get something to eat, if Jimin and Seokjin haven’t left it’ll be like a two minute drive.” You shrugged as you both entered the common space. 

“You both aren’t going anywhere.” Namjoon had been running around with Taehyung while Jimin and Seokjin were working frantically on...what looked like an engine box as the man turned around with a serious expression making you and Jungkook twist into concern, “The Arbitrators are here on Earth, which means we’re leaving.” 

You didn’t quite understand the gravity of the situation but...you had a feeling this wasn’t an ideal situation.

[anonquack]

| Best Friend |

Alex Quackity x Reader, Oneshot!

Word Count: 10661

Warnings: Some curse words and overthinking. This one got a bit long!

Summary: After a CC Convention is announced, you and your friends plan to meet up for it. You expect to enjoy yourself with friends but instead are forced to deal with feelings you didn't even know you had. Luckily, your friends are there to give you a push in the right direction.

"Okay but height comparison between Quackity and Sapnap when??" You asked midst all the chaos occurring on that wonderful night. Despite your busy schedule, you'd gotten some time off to finally stream and some friends to keep you company.

Which resulted in this mess of a stream you were now broadcasting.

Your question caught their attention, and a soft scoff could be heard from Sapnap's mic.

"You're kidding, right? You're basically saying you need to CHECK that I'm taller when we already know that's true. You're insulting me." Sapnap said, the cockiness evident in his tone. You couldn't help but stare at your monitor in amusement at how sure of himself he sounded.

"That's not true. Literally check the height check Karl and I had versus the one Sapnap had with him." Quackity argued back, earning scoffs from almost everyone on the call.

"I know you're trying to use that to back you up, but you're just proving my point." Sapnap was intense whenever he became competitive or got into arguments, so you could only raise your brows as you watched chat fly by with their own opinions on the discussion, including their very questionable comments regarding Sapnap and how attractive he was being.

"Well, personally," Bad quipped in, "I think Sapnap's the taller one. Just makes the most sense since Quackity gives off Short Person Energy."

"Yeah? Well keep that WRONG opinion to yourself. That shit's embarrassing-"

"Language!" Bad interrupts Quackity, eliciting a laugh from everyone on call.

"You know chat," you call out after pondering on a solution for a bit, "We can figure this all out during the meetup!"

"Meetup?" Bad asked, confusion evident in his tone. You could almost see his furrowed brows and confused smile.

"Yes, Bad, meet-up. All four of us. Plus the others. And you guys, if you decide to go." The last bit was directed at the viewers. "Don't you remember? The convention is a thing that's supposed to be happening this year."

"Ohhh." He let out a small sound, as if his memory was finally coming back. "I haven't decided if I'm going yet." He admits softly.

"You most certainly are! You have to be there so I can beat BOTH Sapnap and you up once we all find out I'm the taller one." Quackity chimes in finally, teasing tone evident.

"As if," Sapnap scoffs, "Bad and I will literally kick your ass."

"Language." Soft as ever, and also a sign that it's getting late. You look over at your monitor, which displayed the time before letting out a small gasp.

"Oh- it's late. I hope I haven't been keeping you guys awake for too long. It's probably best we end for tonight anyway." You hum softly as you click some tabs away, noticing the faint sounds of stretching heard in the background of the call.

"It's fine, I wasn't even tired until you mentioned how late it was. You should've kept quiet." Quackity says with a patronizing tone, to which you simply chuckle.

"Thank you guys for sticking around. I really had a lot of fun.. we should do this more often. Us four." It was an honest confession, but perhaps too soft for them all and too personal for the audience to listen in on too.

"I had fun too, you should invite me to your streams more often, or, whatever." Sapnap mumbles, sounding a bit tired as well, but sincere despite the lack of care in his words.

It results in a small smile on your face anyway.

"Bye!! Thank you for inviting us, I'm gonna miss messing around with you all. Sleep well." Bad adds, a small whine to his voice as they all start saying their goodbyes.

As they finish up their goodbyes, you quickly deafen to start saying your own goodbyes to chat and thanking the last minute subs rolling in.

After all is over, you finish closing up the tabs, leaving the discord one last. As you're about to officially leave the call, you realize there is still one person there. He hadn't left.

"Quackity-?" You'd voiced out in confusion after undeafening. You'd thought they'd all leave while you took your sweet time saying goodbye.

"Yeah?" He sounded confused by your own confusion. You couldn't help the small smile that appeared on your face.

"Were you waiting for me to end or did you just forget to leave the call?" It was a genuine question, but perhaps a teasing tone slipped in towards the end.

"I was waiting, I'm not an asshole nor a dumbass." He lets out a laugh before continuing. "I just wanted to say I had fun tonight."

You hummed softly, "I'm glad you did. I had fun too."

"If I'm being honest, I wasn't feeling all too well, and just, joking around with you.. Sapnap, and Bad.. well it was just really nice. Thank you." His tone was soft, filled your headphones so nicely and brought comfort into the air.

"Oh, well it's good that you're feeling better now, but if you ever aren't feeling up for a stream.. please tell me, okay? Your wellbeing is much more important to me than a scuffed stream."

"No no, it's fine. I needed something to distract myself with and you all helped so much. It really got me excited for the meet-up. I- I can't wait to hang out with you in person. With all of you, I mean."

The smile on your face grew, almost to the point where it had your cheeks hurting. "I can't wait to hang out with all of you either. Good thing we won't have to wait long, hm?"

Faint sounds in the background of stretching and even softer yawns. "Mhm. Do you wanna switch to phone call?"

It was the usual invitation to fall asleep on call together. At this point, it almost felt strange whenever you headed to bed without Quackity mumbling stuff about his day to you or hearing the soft breathing sounds from his end of the call.

"Sounds good. Talk to you in a bit." You smiled, hearing a small bye from him before leaving the call. You turned off your whole setup for the night and headed straight to your bed.

It didn't take long for the phone to start ringing a few moments after you'd managed to lay down.

"Hi." You answered softly, placing the phone next to your head as you covered yourself with your blankets. It was only a matter of time before the sleepiness took over, but for now you'd enjoy Quackity's company.

"Hey." Was his response, voice sounding much closer now that you were laying down with your phone so close to your ear. It almost felt like he was laying down beside you.

You wondered for a split second what that would be like, if he'd be warm and welcoming or if he'd value his personal space while sharing a bed. As friends, of course.

You refocused on his voice as he began talking about his plans for the meet-up, and all the things he wanted to do once you all were in person. It was so sweet to hear how excited he was, and just how much he wanted to do with you all.

Sweet moments like these make you hyper-aware of the amazing friends you have, and how much love you have for them all. Tonight couldn't have been better, all thanks to them.

—

As the meet-up date gets closer, and more interactions happen during streams / calls / messages, it becomes more evident how much your friends mean to you; just how badly you want to meet all of them.

And as the date for the meet-up gets closer, responsibilities such as packing for your trip join your very long To-Do list.

You're on the phone with Bad as you both choose clothes to take, folding and packing them nicely. Making conversation, with Rat barking in the background occasionally, as the cherry on top.

Moments like these make you realize how good of a friend Badboyhalo is. He's kind, always knows what to say to help people feel better. He's funny, he's charming, full of love and support for his friends.

You two had been joking around on FaceTime for quite some time after you'd packed all essentials. He showed you tricks he'd managed to teach Rat, and you gave him an apartment tour.

Neither of you seemed to be getting tired, so you stayed on call until somehow you ended up sprawled on your sofa, laptop at hand, screen sharing YouTube videos. Bad was resting comfortably on his bed as small giggles left him at the absurdity of the videos you two were watching.

Every few minutes a small "We should do that," or a "Imagine Sapnap doing that," or a "I want to meet you all so bad," would be murmured into the air with only a hum of agreement to compliment it. It only made you yearn for your friends even more.

"Bad." You called out after quite a few random videos and lids getting heavier with each second.

"Yes?"

"When I see you, I'm gonna hug the shit out of you. I hope you know that." You said, small smile on your face as you watched his head lift up from the pillow at such a fast speed.

"Language-! But well, that would be nice. I will also be giving you tons of hugs. To all of you." He pauses for a second before continuing. "I was actually kinda nervous for the meetup, but now I'm just so excited."

"I'm really glad to hear that, Bad. I will make sure you enjoy yourself to the max."

"Thank you y/n," he replies softly, resting his head against the pillow again, "I will make sure you enjoy yourself too."

You smiled at the state he was in, you two would fall asleep in no time, so your thoughts were honestly incoherent, and your tongue could not be tamed as your thoughts wandered aimlessly.

"Do you think I can take Sapnap and Quackity in a fight? In case they try to beat me up?"

"I doubt they'll try to beat you up, they'll be too busy fighting each other, and he'll be too busy thinking about how cute you are." His words were slightly slurred at this point, and all you could do was laugh as you imagined a fight between Sapnap and Quackity as fans tried getting a picture with them.

It crossed your mind for half a second to ask who exactly would be thinking such a thing, but any sign of a functioning brain between you two was nonexistent at that very moment. So all you really said was, "Good. But I'm still going to be prepared just in case."

—

After so many excited calls and planning, the day was finally here. Everyone would be traveling out today to meet up at the house you'd all managed to rent for the week / weekend you guys would be staying there. This way, you'd all be able to maximize the time spent together, and also save money. It sounded like a wonderful idea, really.

After arriving in the city, you patiently waited for the driver that'd be taking you there. You couldn't help but realize just how anxious you were starting to feel. The moment when you'd meet all your friends was getting closer and closer. What if it wasn't everything you'd expected? Or if it was awkward?

The ride there was too quick. Before you knew it, you were pulling your luggage out the trunk and heading up the path that lead to the front door. You stood still for a few seconds before your knuckles were knocking against the firm wood. The noise echoing for a few seconds as you stood in anticipation.

The door swung open, and with a big grin, you were pulled into a hug by no other than Badboyhalo. You quickly wrapped your arms around him as well, not wanting to let go. He was finally here! And he was real! Real, so so real. Any concerns you had on the way here slowly dissipated the longer he had you in his warm hold.

"Bad!" You said happily, slightly squishing him as your embrace tightened for a few seconds. Seriously too good to be true, but true nonetheless.

As he finally pulled away to smile at you, you felt lightheaded at the insane rush of dopamine in your system. As your head finally cleared up, you realized someone else was walking towards you two.

He wore a small smile on his face as he approached, it slowly growing as he got closer and as excitement became harder and harder to contain.

"Quackity." You called out, face lighting up immediately at the sight of him.

"Hi." He responded, sheepish smile on his face. Had he always looked this good?

It only took a few steps before your arms were around him, pulling him close. Although your firm grip caught him off-guard, he managed to melt into the hug soon after, arms wrapping around you as well.

"Big Q! Quackity! Alex!" You smiled as you pulled away, hand reaching up to give his cheek a light squish. You couldn't really help yourself, he was just too pleasing for your eyes. If the dopamine from earlier wasn't already too much, having him this close and feeling oh so real was even more deadlier.

He laughed at your affectionate touch, obviously not having enough of you either. It didn't take long for him to pull you back in for another embrace. "Holy shit." he mumbled into the hug, "You're actually fucking here. I can't believe it y/n." His tone was soft and it had you melting into his embrace all over again. It was intoxicating in the best way, but eventually you both pull away, smiling at each other with so much appreciation.

You hadn't really taken into account just how excited you were to see all your friends, especially someone as important as Quackity. The one you told almost everything to during late night calls, the person you could honestly consider a best friend. All of them were that to you, but it just felt so much stronger with him. You didn't really know how to explain it.

Before you could even give your mind time to dwell, Quackity was being pulled off you by none other than Sapnap and Karl, which quickly replaced Quackity's arms with their own.

"Guys!!" You called out happily as you hugged them back just as tightly. "Am I really the last one here? Where's Dream, or George?"

"We've literally been waiting like an hour for you to get here! We were all getting impatient." Karl laughed as he finally pulled away from the hug.

"Seriously impatient." Mumbled Sapnap into your shoulder before letting go from the warm embrace. "What took so long?"

"Sorry that I don't live as close to here as you guys do. My flight took longer than expected too."

"Who cares! At least you're finally here." Dream's voice, followed by heavy footsteps on the floor, and laughter as George ran over to where you stood with your suitcase.

"Y/N!! We're all finally together." You almost closed your eyes instinctively from how bright his smile was. George's energy was so contagious, you couldn't help but return the energy he was giving you.

Finally, you turned to Dream, who was standing there in all his tall glory.

"Holy shit." You mumbled as you eyed him from head to toe. "You're so fucking tall."

Laughter erupted from everyone before big arms wrapped around you, filling you with warmth and love. You were finally here with all your friends, and it was better than you could've ever imagined.

"Okay," Karl announces once everyone had greeted each other and given all the much needed hugs, "We were actually thinking movie night so we can all just relax and enjoy each other's company. What do you think, y/n?"

"You aren't getting any complaints from me. What movie are we watching?"

At that, Karl and Sapnap raced off to see who could get the remote control faster. You assumed it was in regards to who had the power to choose what everyone watched.

You watched in amusement as Karl and Sapnap argued over what movie to watch, George chiming in here and there just to fuel the lighthearted argument.

"Did you think they'd be just as annoying in person?" You jumped slightly at the sudden voice coming from behind you, but quickly relaxed as Quackity stood beside you.

"No, I also didn't think it was such a big deal who got to choose the movie." Your eyes trailed back to the arguing pair.

"Oh hush. The food Dream ordered isn't even here so really we're doing you all a favor. Taking our time to choose wisely." Karl argued back, to which Dream laughed.

"I guess that's one way to see it, but it's almost here according to the app, so hurry up."

Silence, before the arguing resumed and filled the living room with a pleasing buzz.

You watched as Dream headed over to you and gently placed his hand onto your shoulder, "Let me show you where your room is so you can get all comfy before movie night starts, yeah?"

"Thank you, Dream. I'd actually really appreciate that." With that, you gave Quackity a small wave before following after Dream. Freshening up after sitting in a plane for hours would certainly help make the rest of the night 10x more pleasant.

—

Once you'd walked back out into the living room, you saw everyone had their plate of food, everyone already comfy in their spots.

You looked around before spotting the empty seat beside Alex and the plate of food you assumed was for you.

"Hurry! He's not gonna bite. Sit down so we can finally start movie night." Sapnap whined the longer you stood around.

"I wouldn't be too sure about that.." George mumbled before receiving a stiff elbow in the ribs from the person seated next to him.

"Language." The last fatal blow.

Dream chuckled before pointing at the available seat. "We even waited for you in order to start eating, so sit your ass down."

You playfully rolled your eyes as they all started complaining about how long you were taking. You sat down beside him, giving him a glance before picking up the plate of food before you. It was still nice and steamy, just like Dream had said it would be after dropping you off in your room. You hadn't realized just how hungry you were until now.

After taking a few bites and hearing the movie start, your gaze returned to the person peacefully sat next to you, taking a few seconds to truly take in the sight before you.

He was wearing a plain black short-sleeve shirt, and some basketball shorts. He looked so comfortable. And even indoors with friends, the beanie kept his hair away from his face and hidden, poorly, but hidden nonetheless.

You smiled as you got comfortable as well, admiring how the light from the TV illuminated his face before finally deciding to focus on the actual entertainment Karl and Sapnap had worked so hard to pick. All for movie night.

The movie was interesting, and you couldn't help the few times you almost choked on your food due to all the jokes being slipped in throughout the movie. Maybe Karl was right about how it takes time to pick the perfect film that fit the mood. A good laugh, some good food, and the company and comfort from friends was the best thing to do on the first day together.

Before you all knew it, you were 2 movies in and all in drowsy states.

Everyone excused themselves, the exception being George and Quackity whom had fallen asleep towards the end of the second movie. Dream agreed to wake George up, meanwhile you turned to the sleeping figure next to you.

He looked too cute, mouth slightly open from the uncomfortable position he'd fallen asleep in. You gently shook his shoulder. "Alex." You called out a few times, until finally his eyes fluttered open and he slowly looked around in confusion.

"You fell asleep during the movie. We're all heading to bed for the day, come on."

Regardless of his sleepy state, he stood and followed as you two headed to your rooms.

"Goodnight, Alex."

"Night, y/n."

As you finally laid in your bed for the next week, you couldn't help but feel so fortunate to have such a wonderful opportunity to meet all of your friends and share a home with them.

You couldn't wait to see what tomorrow had in store for you all.

—

It was a lazy morning and lazy afternoon the next day, the only exceptions being going out for lunch, but besides that everything was done in the comfort of their home.

Dream, Sapnap, and Karl were busy playing a multiplayer game in the living room while Bad, George, and Quackity messed around in the kitchen, eating snacks and making up the absolute dumbest shit to stay entertained.

It seemed difficult to choose which group to spend time with, but you found yourself headed towards the kitchen within seconds of contemplation. Sitting on a chair laughing at George's dumb jokes, egging Bad on, and laughing along to Quackity's contagious laughter.

You found yourself coincidentally seated beside Alex as you all continued to chat and mess around. After some time, the other three joined in, and dinner was ordered so they could all eat together after a long day of lazing around.

You'd all rented out the house for a few days before the convention in order to be able to enjoy more time together, so lazing around today hadn't really seemed like a waste of time, or like it could've been spent better. You'd definitely suggest actually going out for dinner rather than just ordering online for the rest of your stay though.

Before you knew it, chaotic dinner was over and people were headed straight to bed, a certain pair deciding to stay awake just a bit longer in the living room.

You rolled your eyes at their bullshit excuses before heading straight to your room. You quickly changed into sleepwear before sitting in bed and simply scrolling through social media. Honestly, you were tired but not to the point where you could easily doze off. Something felt like it was missing, and you silently racked your brain for answers while continuing the mindless scrolling on your phone.

About 30 minutes later, there was a soft knock on your door. Any distraction was welcome at this point, so you called out to let them know they could walk in.

Before you stood Alex, who seemed to be fresh out of the shower. He was in his sleepwear as well, but the beanie was nowhere in sight. His black hair was out in display, most likely to let it dry, but such a sight still had you in shock.

Not that you hadn't seen it before, but it always surprised you. No matter how many glimpses Quackity provided you with.

You stared in shock for a few seconds longer before snapping out of it and telling him to come in. He smiled and sat down on the edge of your bed.

"I couldn't sleep." He stated, before deciding to further explain. "I almost called you right now before going to bed.. I guess that's just how used I got to our calls-? But then I realized you're literally in the same house as me."

Ah. So was that what was missing? The reason why you couldn't doze off as easily? Because you weren't on call with him?

"That's true, I guess." You hummed before chuckling, "What's wrong with talking on the phone while we're here too?"

"You kidding? I'm not trying to be like Dream and Sapnap who still voice call and barely see each other even though they literally live together." You laughed at his comment, making him laugh as well at the absurdity of that situation.

"So what does that mean? You came to sleep here or something?" It was a joke, really. But I mean, why else would this dude be standing here by your door, talking about how he wanted to sleep call but instead found himself here.

"If you'd let me."

You almost choked at how easily he answered, was he joking too or was he actually expecting you to let him climb into bed? To sleep, of course, but it still had you taken-aback.

"You're serious?"

"Does it look like I'm joking?"

You stared at him for a bit before shrugging, "Get in then."

Nothing wrong with 'sleep calling' in person, right? Laying in the same bed, chatting until each other's voices lulled them to sleep. I mean, just because it was in person this time didn't make it any weirder. They'd slept on call together too many times to count. This was fine.

Alex smiled as he closed the door behind him and headed onto your bed, starting to get comfortable.

As you two lay there, you couldn't help but turn to your side and simply stare over at him. His hair to be exact. He'd never had it visible for this long, on group calls, normal calls, or just showing glimpses. It felt so surreal.

"What?" He mumbled.

"It's just- your hair. It looks so nice. You look nice." You smiled at the sight before adding, "You should do a hair reveal already so everybody can see this."

He turned to lay on his side as well so he could be facing you. "Hell no. Plus, doesn't it make you feel special? Being one of the few people who have seen it? Especially up close and personal."

The last part made you realize just how close you two had gotten within the last few seconds. Being at this proximity made you realize a lot more facial details you hadn't noticed before, probably due to camera quality and pixels.

Your hand slowly reached out, coming to a halt next to his head. He realized what you were trying to do and came a bit closer, letting your fingers gently run through his hair. After a few seconds, it all felt too natural.

There you were, laying in bed with Alex, gently playing with his dark locks as you talked about who knows what and simply enjoyed each others company.

This is basically what those late night calls felt like. Except this was definitely way better. It had the physical aspect of it that calls did not. You got to see him in such perfect resolution face to face, without worrying about any possible lag. You both were real. Basking in each others presences happily.

It didn't take too long for you both to fall asleep, and it didn't take too long either for your sleeping bodies to find comfort in the heat sources nearby.

What started as a simple arm draped around the other to steal a bit of body heat turned into having him close enough to smell the scent that lingered on him from his shower. Close enough for his grip on you to feel just a bit too intimate. Close enough where maybe their noses touched.

That was possibly the comfiest 9 hours of sleep either of them had gotten in a long fucking time.

—

The warmth you find yourself surrounded by makes it hard to get out of bed. As you attempt to fall back asleep, you realize that you're not tired. On the contrary, this might be the most satisfied (in terms of energy and sleep) you've felt in a long time.

What the fuck??

That's when that warmth you'd loved not even a minute ago comes to mind. At first you'd thought it might've been the blanket, but one glimpse to the side answers all your questions.

Alex was the one providing you with this comfortable and lovely warmth. He'd come over last night talking about 'sleep calling' in person. How could you forget?

The tension that had spiked in your body at the realization that someone was in bed with you oozed away as you looked at his peaceful state. He looked.. cute.

A few hair strands were on his face, and you couldn't help as your hand instinctively reached out to get them off his face. You hoped it wouldn't wake him up. He looked too peaceful.

As his face came into full view now, you openly stared, noticing the little moles he had all over his face. It was like stars splattered on the night sky.

As your gaze lowered and lingered on his lips, you realized just how pink they really were. And how unbelievably soft-looking they were. It brought you back a memory of his smile from yesterday while you both ate and watched the movie. You hadn't really caught the bit that had made him laugh since you were staring at him. He had a really pretty smile.

Your thoughts were interrupted at the realization that his eyelids had fluttered open, and were now staring up at you.

Oh God. You probably looked like such a creep right now. The heat that was rising up your spine and onto your cheeks must've been obvious, since he let out a small laugh.

"Were you enjoying the view?"

His morning voice took you by surprise. Sure, you'd heard it during calls sometimes, but this was on another level. It was wonderful.

"I was debating whether or not I should wake you up. You looked too peaceful." You answered, trying your best to steady your embarrassment. It wasn't necessarily a lie. He just didn't have to know all the other thoughts that crossed your mind.

He chuckled at that, before stretching a bit. "Thanks for letting me wake up on my own." He sat up, looking over at you with a small, satisfied smile. "That might've been the best sleep I've gotten in a while."

"Me too." You admitted, soft smile on your lips meant for him and him only. He stared back before returning the smile.

You two stayed in peaceful silence before deciding now was probably the best time to get up and get some breakfast with the rest of them. "We should get dressed so we can go eat."

He simply nodded before giving a small wave, heading back to his own room.

It didn't take long before you were heading out of your room and following the faint laughter into the kitchen. They were seated at the table, barely setting plates down and getting ready to eat. Just in time.

"Y/N! Good morning." Karl smiled, waving you over to the available seat beside him. Everybody else called out their good mornings as you got settled into your seat.

"Was wondering when you'd wake up." Sapnap mumbled from the seat across you. "You and Quackity sleep so fucking much."

You tensed a bit at that. Did they know you two had slept together? In the same bed? Had they tried waking you up and found you two together?

It's not what it looks like, is what you'd probably say as an explanation. Even if they didn't ask for one.

George nods in agreement, "Sapnap and I almost went and knocked on both of your doors. But we figured you both must be tired, so we just came to get breakfast ready."

Okay, perhaps they didn't know. Afterall, they were suggesting that Quackity was still in his own room. "I'm sure he'll get here in a bit." You responded, thanking Dream as he set a cup down on the table for you.

"Finally! Sleeping beauty chooses to come grace us with his presence." Sapnap greeted. You turned your head to see none other than Quackity flipping Sapnap off as he walked into the kitchen. He was dressed for the day, and had his hair hidden away with a beanie.

"How'd you sleep?" Bad asks as Alex finally sits down at the table.

"Wonderful. Best sleep I've gotten in a while." His eyes meet yours for a bit, and you can't help but smile at the implications of his words. You'd helped him sleep well. He felt comfy with you. He smiled back before looking back to the cup being given to him.

"Mm that's good." Bad nodded, before serving whatever breakfast him and Dream had managed to cook for everyone. Bad never failed to amaze you, talented as always.

"We were planning on going out today, is everyone up for it?" George asks, looking around the table for any signs of complaints.

"Honestly I'm all for it. I want to spend time with you all, exploring or just looking around." Sapnap answered, to which you cooed.

"Aww Sapnap, we'd love to spend time with you too."

"I'd fucking hope so. Now where did you want to go, George?"

"Dream and I were researching fun things to do here and we found a pretty good list. Just need you all to say yes and we can head out after breakfast."

He wasn't getting any no's, so the plans were set. Everybody ate their breakfasts before heading out the door to wherever Dream and George planned on taking them.

As you all walked to your destination, which wasn't too far according to George, you found yourself walking beside Bad.

"So, Quackity huh?" You ripped your eyes off from where they were to look back at him.

"Huh?"

"You and Quackity." He wasn't elaborating any further, which left you confused.

"What? What about him?"

"Well, you were staring at him right now and-"

"Oh. I zoned out, Bad. I'm sorry. Hopefully you didn't get the wrong idea." You interrupted him, letting out a small laugh.

"Well, that's not really what gave me the 'wrong idea'.. it was mainly the smiles and stares you two were giving each other this morning. And well, in general. Wanna fill me in on something?" He raised his brow, putting some space between you two and the rest of them by slowing his pace.

Your eyes widened slightly as you slowed down as well. "He was staring at me?"

He nodded, before adding "As much as you were staring at him."

You opened your mouth to try and explain yourself, before you heard Dream calling out to you two, saying they found the place. You gave Bad an apologetic smile before walking with him to where the others stood.

You'd come to a place with food, alcohol, and arcade games. You couldn't have expected less from Dream and George. It was perfect for this group.

You watched as Karl and George bought the cards you'd all be using to play the games. Soon after, they came back and handed everyone their card. Everyone was ready to split off to play different games.

"Y/N and I are going to fetch a table so we can leave our stuff there." Bad said with a smile. You looked over at him knowingly before nodding in agreement.

The rest of them nodded, Sapnap grabbing Dream's arm and racing off with him to the games. Karl, George, and Quackity went off to another game, excited chatter following them.

You walked beside Bad in search of a table quietly, watching as he looked around before finally approaching a table big enough to seat you all.

He sat down, looking at you expectantly. You did the same and cleared your throat as his gaze remained on you. You let out a small sigh.

"Okay, okay, I'll tell you." He smiled a bit at that. "I mean, he came to my room last night, said he couldn't sleep, and then we slept together. That's it."

You watched as his eyes widened slightly at the information he'd just gotten before your own eyes widened.

"Wait- no no! Not like that. I meant he literally slept with me. Like we fell asleep together." You could feel the heat rushing up to your face. "He said he got used to our sleep calling and I just let him sleep in my bed. It was really comfy."

You looked up, his stunned face making the heat rise faster. "Woah. I thought the cheeky little glances you guys were giving each other was things starting to get good, but you already shared a bed with him??" He let out an amused laugh.

"It's not that big of a deal, Bad. We sleep call all the time.." You felt sort of embarrassed, hearing his reactions and telling him things that felt more intimate than they should be.

"Uh? Not a big deal?? You're kidding right?" He let out a laugh, happy smile on his face. "You guys like each other!"

"Bad-! Keep it down please.. and we certainly do not." You were sweating at this point, Bad was so energetic and happy right now, and the thought of Alex hearing any of this had you on edge.

But the most discomforting part of it all was how much truth his words held. Did you actually like him?

"Am I lying, y/n?"

I don't know, is what you would've said, if it wasn't for the confusion clouding all your senses.

"y/n?"

You looked over at him, mouth slightly open, trying to form your thoughts. "You really think I like him?"

"I mean, I've been having a feeling. Since before the meet up."

What? Was it obvious for everyone? How had it taken this long for you to realize it? Those intrusive thoughts while you were staring at him this morning in bed. Had those always been there? Was he aware of your possible feelings?

"Holy fuck, Bad. A lot of it is starting to make sense." Your eyes were slightly wide from the fear of what this implied. What this meant for your friendship with him. "I-I think I do like him."

He seemed to notice how tense and shocked you looked, so he reached out and held your hand, giving it a comforting squeeze.

At the moment, you were connecting all the pieces, and things were slowly starting to make sense. Why you acted a certain way around him, random thoughts thinking he was cute, the need to meet him as soon as possible. God, why had it taken so long for you to realize?

"I mean, at least you ended up liking a nice muffin, right?" It sounded more like a question, which had you letting out a laugh. "What I mean is that he's a good guy, liking him isn't horrible. I can see why you'd end up liking him. Plus- I think everyone can see you two are pretty close."

His words helped ease the tension building up in your shoulders, but your head was still spinning. "I know he's nice, but in what sense? As in, I'll confess and he'll reject me nicely?" You paused, tensing up at just the thought of how awkward that would be. "I'd hate to ruin our friendship just because my dumbass caught feelings."

"Language." He mumbles, before letting out a small sigh. "He's nice as in he'll be understanding if he DOES reject you. But did you miss the last part of my speech? I said your friendship with Quackity is very different, anyone can tell you guys are really close. I can see where these feelings might've come from."

"Just because we're close doesn't excuse me having feelings for him. I mean, what does that say about me? Unable to have close friends without growing romantic feelings for them?" Your voice sounds hushed, as if it's dangerous to admit your feelings out loud.

"I'd say we're close friends, do we have romantic feelings for each other?" He asks softly, playing with your fingers absent-mindedly.

"I mean, I love you tons."

"I love you too, but it's not in the way you like Quackity, right?"

You kept quiet, gently biting at the inside of your cheek. Your brain was looking for ways to invalidate your feelings, tell you it wasn't right, but Bad was fighting through that and trying to reason with you.

"We both love all of our friends, and are really close to them.. but what you and Quackity have is different. I can see why you ended up liking him. Plus.. I really don't think he'd reject you. In fact, I think he likes you too."

"Bad." You warned, unsure you could handle overthinking the possibility that he liked you too right now. The realization of your own feelings was already too much.

"I'm just saying." He says, raising both hands in playful surrender. The sight elicits a small laugh from you.

But maybe.. maybe you were a bit curious. "You really think so?"

"I wouldn't have said it if I didn't. Plus, this is coming from someone who's been friends with both of you for a very long time. I see and notice things."

"Thank you, Bad. I really appreciate you and just‐ thanks for talking this through with me." It's honest and raw. He'd watched you sit at this table, trying to work everything out in your brain, and had just been endlessly supportive.

"Of course. I'm here if you need anything, alright? Now, just relax and let's go play some games, yeah?"

"Okay.. let's go!" You smiled and tugged at his hand, leading him over to where Sapnap and Dream were playing.

There was no way you were letting your own feelings ruin the fun of good food and some arcade games. You'd deal with that later.

—

Bad's advice and pep talks are top tier, but sometimes he oversteps. He doesn't mean any harm, but at times it is just too much. This is one of those times.

There's just a few days left before the big convention, and honestly the time spent together so far has been an absolute bliss. And well-spent considering you've all been out and about more often.

You find yourself in the living room with all of them, joking around and making up stupid songs while Quackity plays a beat he claimed to have made himself on his phone. It's peaceful, and no joke is taken too far. Until Bad starts trying to be the 'best wingman', as he likes to claim.

"Quackity, you should write a song for them, and perform it here in front of everyone." He says as he nudges you suggestively, a knowing smile on his face. It's so sudden and you need to make sure you heard correctly. You can feel yourself tense up at the thought of Quackity making a song dedicated to you. Specifically you. No one else.

Of course, it comes off as a joke, but since Bad knows you like Quackity it just seems way more personal. It seems like he's making it so obvious, but maybe everyone else is painfully oblivious. Clueless.

"Wow Bad. You just want him to roast the shit out of me, don't you? That's messed up." You make a noise of disappointment, trying your best to sound calm and collected.

George laughs at that, "Wowww Bad, that's pretty messed up. But you should, Quackity. Make one about Y/N and their muffins. It'll be funny." George didn't know a thing, but it felt like he was making it worse. As if there was a specific reason why they teased him into making a song about you.

With the playful cheering of everyone around him, he cleared his throat and a new beat started to play on his phone. Before you knew it, he was singing about your fictional muffins and how he would order a dozen, and found a way to include Rat slander in there as well.

Maybe you were stressing out for no reason at all. Perhaps you were the only one taking it weirdly and everyone else was just joking around making stupid songs up on the spot. You took a deep breath, and began to relax.

As the night continued, you tried to avoid any possible spotlight, focusing on getting George and Sapnap to go at each other, and the others egging them on so all you really had to do was watch the chaos ensue. It would all just lead to Sapnap calling the rest of them out and starting more playful fights.

As arguments kept coming up, the one you'd all been talking about on that one stream came to mind.

"Wait.. we still haven't done that height check between Quackity and Sapnap." Karl said with a shocked laugh. "How many days have we been together exactly?"

"Too long." Dream chimed in, eager to see the short people fighting over height they didn't have. At least not compared to him.

"Oh yeah huh." Sapnap said in realization. "Stand the fuck up right now, Quackity." He stood to his full height, puffing up his chest to try and appear taller or bigger.

Quackity rolled his eyes, "You guys only brought that up because I was clearly beating you guys in that argument."

"Okay? Stand up then."

If you were a person passing by hearing this conversation, you'd think a brawl was about to break out. Maybe you'd call security. But having context, it really was just Sapnap in his arguing mood, petty and trying to prove a point. There was no way he was sitting down until he proved he was taller than Quackity.

A small grumble of disapproval left Quackity's mouth before he stood to full height. Bad walked over and lead Quackity towards Sapnap, telling them to stand back to back so everyone could see the height difference.

You sat there in anticipation as Bad got them set up, watched as they compared heights very carefully, watched as the results were announced, and watched as Sapnap cheered and screamed some shit in Quackity's face when it turned out he was a few inches taller than Alex.

To make things funnier, Dream walked over in amusement and checked their height difference himself, making the other two look so much smaller than they already did. It was always a pleasant shock seeing just how tall Dream was compared to the average person.

This lead to height checks between all of them, trying to figure out who was the tallest (easy) and who was the shortest.

After everyone had gotten tired from the playful arguments and day they had, they began leaving to their rooms to freshen up or get comfy, probably needing a break from the banter.

Dream, George, and Karl had agreed to go pick up something to eat while the rest of you guys stayed in the living room. Just chatting now, relaxing, no height wars or petty arguments. Kinda.

"By the way, I found this one cool shop with a bunch of anime stuff. You're coming with me to check it out, right?" Sapnap asks, breaking the peaceful silence that surrounded you all while scrolling on your phones.

You looked up in confusion, not sure who he was talking to. His eyes met yours, and he gave you a look that said he was waiting for your response. "You wanna go with me?" You ask, a bit shocked since you'd expect him to go with Karl or something.

"Duh. We could look through the whole shop and see what we can find. Maybe go eat afterwards." He explains with a smile. He seems excited, and his energy is just so contagious, you can't help but smile as well.

"Well, since we're all here I'm assuming we're invited as well. Right, Sapnap?"

It's Quackity, inserting himself into the conversation, eyebrows raised and lawyer voice on, ready to fight Sapnap on this. This earns him a scoff from Sapnap.

"Don't think you'll wanna come with us. I know it's not really your thing."

"Sapnap, I'm sure he can join. Don't you see he's pouting? Plus, I'm sure food will cheer the baby up." You tease, watching as Quackity's facial expression changes into a scowl.

"Yeah right. Plus, it's rude to ask them out in front of Bad and I. We're literally their plus twos."

Bad snorts. "Plus twos? He's definitely not letting us tag along now."

Sapnap nods. "You literally have so many other days you can spend with them. Let me have my moment. Ask them out yourself if you want later."

You stiffen at the implication he's making, unable to stop the confused frown that appears on your face.

"Whatever." Quackity mumbles, before quickly switching the conversation to his beanie and what he should do to stop fans from snatching it off his head.

The topic of conversation is interesting, and quite frankly very funny, but you can't help but focus on Sapnap's comment.

Surely, he meant no harm. But you can't help the feeling that your little secret you'd shared with Bad was growing more noticeable. And if Sapnap knew? How long would it take for Quackity to realize and push you away?

"Y/N?"

You blink away your state of confusion as you refocus on the conversation. "Huh?"

"I said, how does superglue sound? For his beanie and stuff." Bad had been calling out to you, trying to reinvite you into the conversation. Apparently, you'd been quiet for a while.

"You're such an asshole, Bad. You just want to see me bald so bad." Quackity huffed.

"Not true! Also language."

Bittersweet. Your own thoughts were ruining the fun conversation your friends were having. How to answer this without seeming too obvious? Not like a pining idiot?

"I mean, so what if your hair falls out? The beanie will cover it. It's worth it."

"Plus," adds Sapnap, "your fans have been saying you're bald anyway. Prove them right."

"You're all no help to me and my problems." Quackity finally mutters, earning a laugh from the three of you.

His problems. You wouldn't wanna add another by making him have to deal with a friend trying to get out of the friend zone. You really need to get your feelings in check.

Honestly, you need to get better at hiding this shit. You can't just keep going quiet or getting lost in thought whenever someone suggests anything NOT platonic between you and Alex. I mean, it's ridiculous at this point. Bad is giving you stares, Sapnap might know by now, George might know. Hell, maybe even Quackity knows.

Too much. As soon as the others get back, you excuse yourself and call it a day.

—

Sapnap had been serious about going to that Japanese shop. He'd woken you up early, made you get dressed, and was dragging you out the house before the others could bat an eyelid.

Honestly? You'd had a lot of fun. Watching him look through all the items, picking out everything he wanted, getting matching plushies and these tiny figurines that ended up being too fucking expensive for their size. He'd been so happy, you even offered to pay for his meal in exchange for what he'd bought you earlier.

Throughout your adventures with Sapnap, you received a few notifications from Quackity, asking what you guys were up to, when you'd be back, and whether Sapnap was forcing you to stay over there with him. Sapnap and you rolled your eyes at that last bit, sending him a picture of you two flipping off the camera. All jokes, of course, and in return you received a picture of Quackity doing the same. Then he began claiming that you guys could stay there all day for all he cared.

"Seems like someone is jealous." Sapnap had said after reading Quackity's messages. You looked over at him in surprise before he quickly pocketed your phone, dragging you along to a new section of the store he'd wanted to check out.

Did Sapnap really think so? Could there be a chance Alex actually liked you, like Bad had suggested?

Beside your overthinking, the day had been well-spent, and by the time you got home, you were ready to get out of your outside clothes and into your PJs.

As you finally walked out into the living room, you watched with an amused smile as Sapnap sat with the rest of them, showing them everything he had bought at the shop, including little gifts he'd brought for them all.

No matter how 'careless', he came across, Sapnap was truly a softie. It was endearing watching him hand out the gifts you two had bought at the shop.

You made your way over to the couch, sitting beside Quackity and giving him a smile as he raised his brow. "Don't think I forgot that picture you sent me earlier today."

"You know I didn't mean it." You mumbled as you returned your gaze to Sapnap and his cheerful smile.

"You owe me an apology. And you need to make it up to me."

You scoffed at that, "You flipped me off too."

"And? You did it first. I'm the injured party here."

"Fine." You sighed, turning you gaze back at him. "How can I make it up to you?"

"Mmm.. how about we 'sleep call' again?" You froze at his suggestion, looking over at the others to see if they were listening in on your conversation.

They weren't, all too entranced with the small rant Bad was going on about a certain manga Sapnap had bought.

How could this man just admit that you two slept together with his whole chest. Without a care in the world for who was listening.

"Is that really all you want?" Stunned was the only word to truly describe how you were feeling at the moment.

"I mean, for now. I'll have to see tomorrow if I feel any better."

You rolled your eyes at that. He would most likely take advantage of that and drag it on for as long as he could. "Did you really miss me that much, Alex? Need to make up for the time lost today?"

"Wow. You're trying to make me look desperate now?"

"I just think that's how an outsider listening in on our conversation would interpret it."

"Y'know what? Let's go right now. Since you wanna call me desperate."

Again. Stunned. How was this man acting like it was nothing? This shit wasn't normal. Last time wasn't too bad because you didn't know, but now? You'd be too focused on not making it seem romantic, just purely platonic laying on the same bed together with your friend who you don't have feelings for.

It didn't take long for everyone to start heading to their rooms. He excused himself, and you followed a few minutes after, heading to your room in a daze.

As you waited for him to come to your room, you couldn't help but wonder if it'd be the same as last time. Would you be able to play with his hair or cuddle close in a strictly platonic way? Maybe you could call him bro a few times so it didn't seem like you liked him.

Your thoughts were interrupted by the door opening and revealing him in all his glory. He looked so comfy, and the beanie was once again nowhere to be seen.

Perhaps you were overreacting, but you felt this was his way of letting you know he trusted you. That he was truly comfortable around you.

This time, he felt more at ease entering your personal space. He got into bed and got comfy on his own. It didn't take long before he was facing you again, just like last time.

You smiled at him and did the same as him, your previous plans of putting distance and calling him bro getting thrown out the window at this new sight of him.

He looked so cute, just laying there and looking at you. He looked so warm too, you couldn't wait until you actually got to pull him close and blame it on your sleepy state.

"So," he started, "how was your date with Sapnap?"

Huh? The tone really caught you off guard.

"It wasn't a date. We just went to look at some manga he wanted, and got little gifts for everyone. Went to eat."

"Sounds like a date."

You narrowed your eyes at him. What the hell was that supposed to mean?

"Well, it wasn't. Why does it matter to you though?"

"It doesn't."

"Then?? You jealous or something?" You raised a brow, genuinely confused, but also wanting to see his reaction to the last bit. Maybe it'd give you some insight on his feelings for you. If there was any.

"I'm just making sure! Sue me for trying to respect anything that could possibly be going on between you two." He paused. "I wouldn't want to be asking you to sleep with me and then it turns out you and Sapnap are a thing."

You paused and simply stared at him. Was this dude serious? He was worried about you and Sapnap dating, when in reality you liked HIM? Sick and twisted.

"Well, you don't have to worry about that. Sapnap and I aren't a thing. I like someone else." You answered, and honestly you don't know why you said that.

He paused for a bit, expression unreadable before simply nodding. "And is it possible to know who this someone is??"

How did you end up in this position? It wasn't that long ago that you were confessing to Bad about your feelings for Alex while surrounded by fucking arcade games. And now you were in bed with him while he asked who your crush was. Leave it to you to mess up this badly.

You took a few more moments to just lay there with him, hand eventually going to his hair and gently playing with it. "I don't want to ruin anything." You finally responded.

It was the truth. You could just tell him, but you wouldn't be able to live with yourself if your revelation lead to him growing distant, or him rejecting you and ruining the rest of the trip.

At that, he sat up, making your hand slip out from where it had been playing with his hair. "Are you afraid you'll hurt my feelings?"

You sat up as well, staring at him for a bit before shaking your head. "I'm afraid you'll hurt mine."

"I wouldn't dare." He said reassuringly, hand reaching out to intertwine with yours.

It might've been the adrenaline rushing through your body, or the pessimist in you just telling you to get over with it, but you sat there and confessed that you liked him.

At first, there wasn't much of a response beside his wide eyes and stunned smile. You didn't necessarily know what that meant. Was he on the verge of laughter or was he shocked because he liked you as well?

The silence was killing you, and you swear you could feel tears threatening to spill as he continued to just stare. Nothing could've possibly been worst than his silence at that moment.

"You really do like me? Me, Alex Quackity?" Were his first words, and you watched as he shook his head, as if he was trying to make sense of it all.

"I don't expect you to feel the same or-"

"No no. You like me?"

He was trying to get you to repeat it, or admit it again, but it was torture.

"... I do."

He smiled at that, coming closer and using his free hand to cup your cheek. "Yeah? Well, it's your lucky day because.. I like you too."

You really couldn't believe what you were hearing. Bad had been right about him liking you as well. If he found out, he'd brag about being right and being the 'best wingman' for so long.

"Seriously?" It never hurt to double check.

"Yeah."

And with that, the distance between you two was closed. Soft lips pressed against each other awkwardly at first, not used to kissing your best friend, but it soon melted into a sweet first kiss.

After he pulled away, you gently cupped his cheeks as well, smiling at just how unbelievable this was. The guy you'd been unknowingly pining for this whole time actually liked you back, and you'd just kissed him on your bed. Bonus: he was staying the whole night for some cuddles.

You laid back down, pulling him with you and simply wrapped your arms around him, leaving small and shy kisses on his cheek, not used to this at all, testing what was okay and what wasn't. But his smile and kisses he was giving you as well told you he was more than fine with this.

"Does this make up for it?" You mumble against his own lips, teasing tone evident.

"Yes, yes it does."

—

The next morning was when the countdown finally came to an end. The day you'd all been waiting for; The Convention.

You knew this meant getting up, eating breakfast, and starting to get ready. It was a big day.

But when Quackity wanted to lay down for just a bit longer, how could you possibly say no?

This lead to you both having to walk out of your room and head straight to the kitchen 15 minutes later. There was no time to waste by pretending to have come out of your own rooms and at different times.

As you both approached the dinner table and sat down, you realized the table was dead silent, all eyes on both of you.

You looked up, making eye contact with Bad. He had this knowing grin on his face, and you couldn't help it as you felt the heat rushing up to your face. Quackity seemed unfazed by it all, simply yawning and beginning to eat his breakfast.

"So did it work or what?" Sapnap broke the silence, an expectant look on his face as he stared between you and Quackity.

"What are you talking about?" You asked, now feeling very confused.

Bad couldn't hold in his laughter any longer, and burst out into happy giggles.

"Well we were trying to make Alex get jealous so he could finally make a move. Did he do it?" Sapnap asked. Karl was smiling wide, trying to cover it with the sleeve of his sweater.

Did this mean that Karl, Sapnap, and Bad all knew you two liked each other? Had these three plotted this shit? Getting you two to realize your own feelings?

"What? You did that shit on purpose?" It was Quackity's turn to be dumbfounded.

"Duh. We figured we'd give you guys a little push in the right direction." Sapnap had a satisfied smile on his face.

You couldn't help but feel embarrassed. Your friends had worked together to make you both come to terms with your feelings. Since you two were so oblivious. Wow.

"I hate to say it since it means you actually helped,,, but it did work. We talked last night and well.. we both confessed." There was a soft smile on his lips as he told the others about what had happened.

Bad let out a small cheer, clapping his hands excitedly before congratulating you both on talking out your feelings.

"Okay now that the lovebirds are finally together, let's finish breakfast and start getting ready. Remember today is a big day!" Dream said, sounding quite excited himself.

You'd honestly forgotten for a few minutes because of the whiplash of your friends confessing they were playing cupid.

Today was the convention. The whole reason you'd all traveled out here. This whole trip had been lovely, leading up to the final event.

And you'd be leaving with a date, and good memories spent with fans and friends.

<3

[your-highnessmarvel]

From Bleak to Bright

Requested by Anonymous: the world is in black and white until you meet your soulmate. you’re Bruce’s little sister. you want to go with him during Avengers 2012 because you’re the only one that “can calm the beast” if ever he pops out. so you’re just chilling with the avengers in the flying thing. then they bring Loki in. the world goes to bright, bright colors. you don’t want it to be him. but it is. no one knows. no one knows but him.

AN: IM BACK. YES. AFTER LIKE A WHOLE YEAR. the flying thingy. me too i had to google it, ahaha

Warnings: angst, language

*gif not mine

Enjoyed this and want more? Send in your requests!

Request Guidelines

MASTERLIST

You spun on the stool, facing your brother with a sigh. He scratched the back of his head, the glow from Loki’s scepter reflecting on his specs in a grey light. 

“One more hour?” he asked with a wince. 

You rolled your eyes. “Okay,” you groaned. “But then we’re off to bed. And I’m putting Celine Dion on the stereo to sleep.”

“Not her again,” he groaned. 

You raised a finger, brows crawling up your forehead. “You made me come here on this ridiculous flying tank with the God damned Avengers, of all people, and we’ve been here for four days listening to sounds of water dripping and Cap’s fifties music.”

Bruce sighed, leaning his forehead into his palm. “Fine.” His hands went up in mock surrender. You could see the tension in his shoulders, straining against the material of his chemise. 

Not that you could see the color of it. You imagined it was blue. Bruce liked blue. Bruce knew colors. Of course he did. He’d met his soulmate such a long time ago, you’d forgotten she even existed. 

But not you. You’d gone through life in the dreary black and white of a world without a soulmate. But now you were curious. You knew the colors by name, but not sight. What does green even look like? Bruce had told you trees and grass were green. Some people’s eyes. Ever since he’d told you that, green became your favorite. Maybe blue could beat it, since Tony Stark had told you the sky was all shades of blue combined. 

An alarmed blared overhead, and your first instinct was to run to your brother’s side. Bruce’s eyes met yours, his mouth tugging up at the corners. 

He’s fine.

Your hand found the curve of his forearm, still. No one really knew what actually triggered the Hulk, and you, being his little sister, were the only human alive able to tame the beast. 

You heard footsteps, many, clambering loudly down the hall. The door to Bruce’s workspace was wide open, and you heard the telltale sound of security making their way down the hall. You frowned. What could they be doing so late at night, and so many all together?

At first, from the windows in the workspace, you only saw the black suits of the security patrol, their reflective masks bright in the hall. They walked in patterned, simultaneous movements, guns held firm in their grasps.

You saw the top of a really - no, seriously, really! - tall head, black hair. White skin. And as the small platoon of security walked passed your door, you saw the man walking in their midst, tied in shackles. 

He turned his head, buzzing in your mind, something deep in your chest tightening. And then you saw the color of his eyes. 

You couldn’t tell at first. Because the world became so vivid, so bright. He went from black and white to stark and bright and whole before your eyes, stealing the breath from your lungs. 

A ringing started in your ears, a burning in your throat. You couldn’t help but stare, watching his eyes drink you in as well, watching his own world turn from ash to bright as the sun. 

No, you thought. No. Not him. 

Anyone but him.

And just before he rounded the corner, his lips stretched into a smirk. 

A cold hand on your arm brought you back. As if slamming back into your body. 

“You okay?” Bruce asked. 

You gulped. Nodded. Felt your cheeks blooming with heat. “Yeah, of course.”

You could see the colors on your brother, now. Albeit, not being able to tell which specific color it was. And yet he was beautiful. Later, after hours of searching online for colors, you’d be able to tell his hair was black, his eyes a warmest brown, his skin a shade of white a few degrees darker than yours. 

But now, it took everything in you not to scream. 

You could finally see the entire world for what it truly was and all because of a demi-God wrought with darkness. 

No. It couldn’t be him.

You separated from your brother, your mouth dry, feeling his eyes on you. He could always tell when you were troubled. But there was just no way, no freaking way, you’d tell him that you’d just met your soulmate. If he knew who it was... No. You wouldn’t tell him. You wouldn’t tell anyone. 

You went to the computer and turned the screen away from Bruce, clearing your throat. Bruce went back to his own computer.

You didn’t even search up colors yet. You searched up the possibility of soulmates being wrong for each other. The computer spat out articles and data from hundreds of years, all proving that the soulmate trigger worked. That the signs of color all proved one had met the person right for them.

You sighed, dropping your head in your hands. 

You rubbed at your eyes, steeling yourself for what you were about to ask. 

“Bruce?”

“Hmm?”

“Did they just bring in Loki?”

His head raised from his computer. “Yeah.” He frowned. “I’m going to go ask why. Does it disturb you that he’s here?”

You scratched your jaw. “No, not at all,” you said quickly, too quickly. You cringed internally, hoping your face didn’t mimic the shame you felt. “Just - why?”

“I’ll go ask,” Bruce said. If he had any inkling as to why you were suddenly intrigued in God of mischief, he didn’t give any clue. 

He left. You took a second to steady yourself. You counted your fingers. Felt the shape of your face. 

Then you took a breath in and all but flew out the door. 

You followed the maze that was the inner organs of the Helicarrier until you reached the “jail”, which was, upon inquiry, meant to hold your brother if ever you weren’t there to calm him in time. 

You watched from outside the doors as Fury talked to Loki. You couldn’t help the fire in your chest as you watched. Loki seemed trapped, looking discreetly around the room, around his glass cage, his green eyes keen on any weakness.

You felt the sweat collecting in the palm of your hands. You waited patiently, praying whatever Bruce was up to would keep him long enough that he wouldn’t come looking for you. You heard broken pieces of the conversation on the other side of the steel enforced doors, but Loki’s voice was even, steady, unafraid. 

He knew he wouldn’t be beat here.

You counted to one hundred the moment Fury walked out. Your heart beat vehemently between your ribs, battering your bones. Your knees were putty when you finally, slowly, opened the doors.

The air ruffled your hair, blowing it out of your face. 

He stood tall, straight, unmoving, statuesque in the middle of his prison. Hands at his sides. Eyes mild. Mouth straight. He gave no indication that his world had finally shifted after millennia of black and white. 

“I didn’t have to wait long.” His voice sent shivers down your spine, your body so reactive to even the sound of his words that you wondered, for just a second, what his touch would do. 

You closed the door, tentatively approaching the control board. You saw a big red button and decided maybe touching random buttons wouldn’t do any of you any good. 

“What’s your name?” he asked, following your movements with his sharp emerald gaze. He still stood there, like cement was poured down the length of his spine. 

You darted your eyes back to his. He was glad in - what you later learned - was a green and gold ensemble, a green cotton cape grazing the floor of his cage. He was beautiful, really. Cut by the finest knife to the most perfect edge. 

He smiled then, creasing his cheeks in what you could only feel as adorable. 

“Didn’t expect it to be moi, did you, princess?”

You tried not to react, but heat bloomed across your cheeks, giving you away. 

“Why?” you asked.

He rolled his eyes, sighing dramatically, breaking his statuesque stance to throw his arms up. “By the Gods,” he groaned, accent thick on his tongue. “You humans are so pathetic. Why this? Why that? Why me? Oh, you want to be so special that you question the straight line of fate as if the entire meaning of the world revolved around you.”

You raised your brows. Wow. He’d been thinking of that for a while.

“Do you know the colors?” you asked, approaching the glass that separated you from your soulmate. 

He took you in, green eyes drinking you in from head to toe. He didn’t seem to think anything negative about his soulmate. “I’ve taken sense-enhancing drugs in my lifetime,” he said. “I’ve known colors briefly. Thor taught them to me.”

You nodded. “Your eyes are green.”

His lips split in a grin. “You’re very perceptive,” he chuckled. “And you’re wearing a powder blue sweater. Childish.”

Something in you shifted and you wanted to say something, something bad. Something along the lines of, “what is your favorite color?” and then run and wear it.

Instead, you approached the glass even more. By this distance, you could see he was significantly taller than you. He eyed you down his nose. 

“A human,” he said with distaste. 

“Maybe that’s your punishment,” you ventured, your heart railing against your ribs. “Maybe that’s your conundrum. You’ve thought nothing of humanity but the possibility to dominate and squander us under your boot like ants. Isn’t it fitting?”

You saw the anger cross his face before his lips spat the vile things he thought in his mind. “You are not worthy of a God, you fleeting, imbecile, nothingness of a human. I will outlive you before I even grow a white hair. Our children will watch you wither before they’ve even gone to school.”

“Our children?”

That seemed to faze him. 

Wow, you thought. Of all the things Loki was, he was traditional. He very well intended to follow through with the soulmate script; to marry you and have children with you.

The thought first amazed you, burning bright in your mind’s eye. Then you thought twice and feigned disgust. 

He laughed. “Oh, please, you’re the luckiest woman in the universe to have been bound to a God.”

“Aren’t you a demi?”

His gaze placated you. “I am, but the fact remains that I am greater than you, greater than anything your pathetic little human brain can conceive.”

You rolled your eyes with audacity you didn’t know you had. “Well,” you sighed, shrugging, hands in your back pockets. “What now?”

He cocked his head. “What do you mean?”

“Are we to start this - thing, or are we to go back to our normal lives and, hoping you don’t obliterate the planet, we never see each other again?”

His jaw clenched, working. “You know it’s physically impossible now for us to be apart.” He said this through clenched teeth, hands in fists. 

You shrugged again. “I don’t know about you but I wouldn’t mind never having to look at your ugly mug ever again.”

He frowned deeply. “Try it, then, you’ll see, mortal.”

You sighed apathetically, turning your back to him. 

“Before you go!” Loki called. You turned slowly on your heel, offering him nothing but your side profile. “Let your brother know I’m hoping to meet him soon.”

The blood in your veins went cold. 

Part 2? Anybody?

[hoodieofholland]

Prove you something // Mob!Tom Smut

Summary: you get jealous over a meeting Tom have with another woman without your knowledge, and he has to prove you something.

Pairing: mob!tom x reader

Word count: ~4.5K

Warnings: smut (18+), fingering (f.), oral (f.), language.

A/n: I’m a sucker for mob!Tom, judge me, but these last contents we’ve been receiving for the past month are the blame. here we go again, enjoy.

Masterlist

****************************************************

As a mob, Tom had to deal with a lot of different people throughout his busy day. You were used to the meetings all the time, even when it was past afternoon, hiting the midnight. Patiently, you'd wait your turn to share some good time with your boyfriend, unless he wanted you to stay for the day, besides him, in the conference room.

Today was slightly different. Tom was held for hours in the conference room, talking business, while you distracted yourself with some other work. But by the time it was around 7p.m., you were bored enough to walk up the place, wanting to know when he'd be over.

Wearing your favorite pyjamas, you walked through the silent house, and just as approaching the conference room, you heard an unusual type of voice.

"Listen, Tom, I'm not here to discuss the shitty situation..."

It got your attention, made you stop in your tracks to hear better, all because it was a female voice. Normally, Tom would always meet with men, them being the mob leaders around London. Not a woman.

You tried to sneak around and see if there were another voice in the room, but as soon as you put your ear to the door's thick wood, Harrison came up behind your figure, making you jump.

"Holy shit!" You screamed in whispers. "Jesus, Harrison, you scared the hell out of me!"

Harrison didn't make any effort to cover his laughter, making you shush him.

"Sneaking around, uh?" He teased through laughters. "You know what Tom says about listening behind closed doors. Someday it might come back to you".

Trying to contain your madness, you cross your arms around your chest and snort. "It's meant for you guys, you idiot. He's not talking about his girlfriend".

"Are you really sure?", still holding his teasing smile, he tilts his head a little. Eyeing the door again, he pouted. "Why didn't he invite you tonight, then?"

"Said it was some small business and wouldn't take that long". You shrugged, though you knew it was bullshit. Tom had already been inside that fucking room for what seemed forever. It wasn't any small business talk, for what it matters.

"I can tell you that there's not small talking inside there" he pointed his chin in the room's direction. "Melissa is right there".

A little confused, but still not wanting to give your feelings away, you stay cool with your voice. "Who is Melissa?"

Harrison’s eyes narrowed and you can tell he had no idea you didn’t know about a single thing that was going on inside there.

“Melissa. The majoriest woman in this whole fucking city. She’s, like, the only female mobster leader in England”. The emphasis in his voice made you feel the message he wanted to deliver. You felt even somewhat a little weak, as if the weight of the presence of that woman could be sensed in your lungs.

Harrison quirked a brow, waiting for your answer, but you didn’t say nothing. Why was Tom lying to you? Why he didn’t want you to know that this woman was right inside the room with him?

“Is he alone there?” You questioned Haz, who shakes his head negatively.

“No, I was there a couple of minutes ago. Just grabbing a cup of tea”. He lifted the mug on his hand. “There’s also her guard or something. The chick is a bit... ugh”

You felt the weight again. “What the fuck does ugh means?!”

Harrison was about to explain, but seeing your exasperated reaction, he just smiled teasingly again. “I think someone is jealous”.

You puffed your cheeks out in frustration, wanting to tug on your hair, or maybe on Harrison’s.

“You’re being ridiculous” you tried your best to sound neutral about the fact that your boyfriend was inside a not very large room with a woman you didn’t know nothing about, but it was getting harder as Harrison seemed like having some fun torturing you.

“Don’t worry, y/n, that’s not what I meant” he chuckled softly and gave you a apologetic smile. “It’s just business, that’s all. You know Tom is far from being suspicious”.

You knew that very well, and if you were being honest, that was not your concern. That didn’t make you less jealous, though. Tom was the most faithful man you knew, not only with you, but with his mates. He could do anything for you and he surely had already proved that you’re the only woman in his life.

Anyways, the thought of that powerful woman inside the fucking room was driving you mad.

“I wanna go inside”, you stated, already turning on your heels. Harrison was quick to grab your wrist, trying to stop you from entering the room.

“Y/n, what the fuck, he doesn’t want to-“

But you were too fast. Yanking the door open, you hear a slight gasp coming from Harrison and the entire room goes silent.

The first thing you notice is Tom, who were crudely interrupted by you. He looked tense with the conversation, eyes heavy, shoulders rigid. His elbow was supported by the large desk in front of his chair, while he seemed to gesticulate with his hand whilst talking to the woman, Melissa. His gaze was directed on you, a questioning look on his features, which didn’t softened like it always did when he talked to you.

“Sorry, I told her-“ Harrison was quick to say, but Tom interrupted him.

“What took you so long?” Ignoring your presence, without changing a single word with you, Tom averted his eyes to Harrison, who came out behind you and sat back at his chair.

“She wanted to come” he answered quietly, unsure of what to say.

Tom looked at you once more, face serious, as he seemed to calculate what say next.

“Why don’t you go wait in the living room, y/n?”

You open your mouth, just to close it again immediately. You didn’t recognize the way Tom was talking to you, almost harshly.

"What, Thomas? You don't enjoy a good woman's company? C'mon, let the girl sit with us" Melissa, who you just had the worry to look at said, putting her long polished nails over her chin. She eyed you up and down before speaking again. "What a beautiful girl you have, by the way. You didn't tell me she was all of that".

Tom closed his eyes briefly, jaw clenching, as he sighed heavily in frustration. You knew he was getting mad, and though you still didn't know why, you made up your mind.

"I'm fine, gonna wait in the room. Sorry for-"

"It's alright", he shook his head and looked back to Melissa. "It was good talking to you, but I need time to figure it out before we decide anything", Tom stood up from his chair and waited until the woman did the same. "I'm going to have a talk with my men and then I call you back".

Melissa smiled, but you could see very clearly that it was nothing but a false smile. "I'll keep in touch".

Tom just nodded once and waited for Melissa to walk out of the room, guided by Harrison, who was equally tense as he made his way to the door. Before she exited the room, Melissa had an eye on you again, a tiny smile making its presence on her face.

You shivered, too aware of the dangerous and power Harrison told you she held, clear in the way she wasn't afraid to show she was staring at you.

When the doors were closed, you couldn't lift your gaze from the floor. However, it was possible to see Tom by the corner of your eyes and the way he was supporting both of his hands on the desk, staring so intently at you that you bet he could see your goosebumps.

"Now that you have my attention", he started, voice deep. "Won't you say what was so important that you couldn't wait 'til I was over?"

You didn't say anything, neither looked at him, frozen on your spot.

"I'm talking to you".

His stern act had you conflicted. He would always use it in bed with you, but never got so mad at something that you did. Something that you didn't even know what was all about.

"You were taking too long, so I wanted to see if everything was alright", you answered, keeping your voice loud and clear enough, not wanting to give him the impression that you were intimidated by his words.

Tom snorted. "That's bullshit. I've already been out until later than this and you stayed in our room".

You roll your eyes, voice cheating you as the irritation consumes your thoughts. "Well, in these nights you weren't with a girl inside here".

Tom's face changed and a brow arched as a trace of a smirk made its way to his face. You had lost your though posture and you knew it.

"Are you jealous?" He chuckles, incredulous, "Really?"

You snort, unfolding your arms. Looking relaxed is the last thing you seem to be able to do right now, but also you didn't want to sound so immature being jealous over nothing.

"No, I am not. I'm just mad that... that you didn't tell me who you were meeting with." You corrected him, though you were too aware it was pretty much a lie. With an unwanted whine, you continue "And why you didn't let me in this time? You see, you just left a whole amount of suspicious things to my imagination."

Tom narrows his eyes, a mix of curiosity and confusion evident on his face.

"You don't actually believe it yourself, do you?" He questioned, a suspicious tone in his voice. A bit ashamed, you glanced down and nodded two times.

"I mean, Harrison just told me she's the biggest woman in London, or some shit like that" you shrugged involuntarily and felt tired, as you started to realise how silly you must be sounding.

It was pretty obvious to you that none of that should matter. Actually, it never did. Tom never turned his head to another woman but you, since you met. He never talked about any other girl than you, and you could tell he bragged about how much of a "lucky motherfucker" he was, as Harrison started complaining about Tom's random rambling just the other day.

Tom had done nothing but adored you since the first time he called you darling. And now you were overreacting because of a common meeting of his.

Tom sighed heavily and offered you his hand. Looking at it for one second, you reach for him, and he brings you closer. "That's probably my fault".

You tilt your head, not understanding his point. Tom sits down back on his chair e mention for you to take a seat on his thigh.

"Don't get me wrong, darling. I let you come to meetings only if I'm one hundred percent sure there's no harm on that. When I'm with friends, not my enemies" he caress two slender fingers through your cheek and you almost close your eyes in please, if it wasn't for his deep stare, full of concern and comprehension. "That woman is nothing but trouble for me and my men. She doesn't like us, I don't like her, but, apparently, one of my man messed up with one of her best one, so I was trying to settle everything down before one of us start a fucking fight about it. Obviously, she hates me and every single one of my mates, and that's why I didn't want you here today. My most important job is to keep you safe, y/n. I've already dragged you too far into this mess, I can't expose you even more."

By the look in his eyes, anyone could tell how Tom meant it. He worried about you and your protection had become a topic of discussions too much for your liking.

He shifts his position, making it more comfortable for you, hand resting in your cheek. His expression earned an even more stern look, almost in pain as he looked deeper in your eyes.

"Do you really think that you should worry about Melissa?" He asks, voice low and soft.

You didn't answer right away. Instead, you tugged at his white plain shirt's collar, breathing slowly as you tried to manifest more of your composure than before.

"A little" you confess, shrugging slightly as if it wasn't that big of a deal. But for Tom, it surely was.

"Darling... why would you be jealous over that woman?" The pad of his index finger touched in the slightest move your bottom lip, tracing delicate paths over it. "Why would you ever be jealous over any woman? You know I love you". He looked up once again, a brow arching as he seemed to doubt his own conviction. "Don't you know?"

You shake your head yes and bite your lip. "Of course I do".

"Then why did you have something in your imagination?"

You sigh quietly. "Yeah, it was silly", taking his free hand and in yours, you play with his fingers, trying to hide your embarrassment. "I'm sorry-"

"It's alright, love", he gives you a small yet sweet smile. "You see, I get jealous all the time. Much more than you do. Think it's fair enough".

You giggle. "Yes, you do. I hate that and did the same. Sorry".

Tom shakes his head and brings his face closer to yours, planting a soft kiss in the corner of your mouth. "What a silly little girl you are. How would you ever think I'd ever have eyes for another girl, when I've got the prettiest with me?"

You release a breathe, your grip at Tom's shirt stronger, pulling him closer. "You'd be really dumb if you did, yeah."

Tom smiles in your mouth and you do as well. "Guess I haven't been showing my girl how much I appreciate her properly lately" he whispers, heading his lips along your jaw, to chase a soft spot on your neck. "Tell me, love, would you like to feel it?" His low and seductive words sent a shiver right through your spine, making you release a quiet moan in anticipation.

"Do you want to feel how much I adore you?" He breaths in your neck, smelling your sweet scent, as carefully grabs your thighs to get you to straddle his lap. "How much I adore your pretty little moans and whines? Those wonderful sounds you make just for me?"

You nod yes, adjusting your position on Tom's lap, rubbing against his crotch on accident and feeling he grunt with the contact.

"Use your words, my love. Need to hear you". He insists, running both his hands to your ass, grabbing each cheek firmly. When you whine a timid 'yes', he smirks against your smooth skin. "Always so eager for me", with precise movements, he guides your hips to meet his, creating a perfect friction between both of you. You could feel his hard against your pulsing center, claiming for more.

Tom lets out a struggled sigh, as if he was holding himself back when feeling your center pressing against him. "See? Only you can make me this hard".

You gulp, trying to catch your breath as your hands make its way to his trousers, but Tom is quick to deny it and stop you. "No, pretty girl. As much as I'm aching to feel you right now, I need to prove you something" he smirks playfully. His right hand releases your bum and goes to your front, making a smooth path in his way to your breast. He put your hard nipples between two fingers, pulling it softly. You moan and move your hips over his lap. Tom's jaw tenses up. "Fuck, darling". He presses his hand firmly on your hip to settle you down, as you smile apologetic.

"Need you, Tom". You whine, arching your back so you were even closer to him.

"Yeah?" He smirks, hand going back to work, sliding inside your pyjamas' short. Tom's brows arch in surprise. "No panties?"

You bite your lip. "When I came down here, I was thinking that maybe we could do something. After you were done".

He chuckled a bit, his cocky smile showing off. "So you were planning on getting fucked in my office?" You only nod once, feeling your center pulse and your cheek heat up. "You dirty, dirty girl".

Tom reaches your pulsing core, a single digit sliding through your wet folds. "God, baby, you're so wet". You moan, letting your weight loose on top of Tom, whose strong arms could handle it. "I barely touched you".

"Stop teasing me, Tom" you claim, eyes closed, as you feel he was threatening to enter two fingers inside you, but collecting them all together again.

"Darling, I think you shouldn't have a word about anything today" he says calmly. "After all, you interrupted my meeting, messed my work up. All because you couldn't wait to get fucked. Do you think you were good, y/n?"

You swallow hard, voice trembling. "N-no".

Tom smiles satisfied. "Yes. Now, though you don't deserve any of that, I'm a man of my word, and I said I was going to show you what my girl is worth of". He gesticulates briefly and you have to take a few seconds to understand he wants you to get up.

You do so, waiting until he gets up too. Confused, you stare at him, who cups your face, kissing the tip of your nose.

"I want you to sit in my chair". He murmurs and you can't help the surprise in your face.

"Why's that?" You frown and he only gestures his head to the chair again. With no other choice, you find yourself doing as you were told.

It was a strange feeling, the soft material of his chair against the bare skin of your exposed leg, where your thin shorts couldn't reach. Strange, because nobody would ever sit on Tom's chair. It wasn't exactly a rule, but everyone did better than risking taking what was his, and that being the biggest and most imposing chair in the conference room, only he could sit there. And maybe that's what entertained him that moment, the sight of you in a place that held so much power as that chair.

It took a good few seconds for you to relax there, and Tom didn't take his eyes from you the whole time. Staring, he would lick his lips, arms crossed over his chest, making his muscular arms very visible for you.

"You know, you could do this. I can picture you sitting here, making demands", he says, as if he was deep in thoughts moments ago, approaching you with hungry eyes. He puts his hands over the chairs' arm rest and lean in you, smiling.

You feel your heart race and try to correct your breathing. "Really?" You arch a brow incredulously. "Don't think I could be so tough".

"You learn this with time, darling", he reassures you, "But I think we'd have to manage who'd be in charge from time to time. I can share it with you, but not give it all. Would you like that?" You knew that by this time he wasn't talking about the mob.

With a charming smile, Tom gets down on both knees and puts his hands in yours. "Yeah, I think", you say in a whisper, too concentrated in his actions to say otherwise or anything else.

"Mmm. You're such a delicate angel", he opens your legs slowly, grabbing the back of your knee to pull you in to him. You gasp in surprise, holding the arm rest to keep yourself steady. "I imagine how you'd look like taking control. Perfect, I know".

It was a sight to see, a powerful man like Tom on his knees, a position you never thought you'd see him at. He looked like he was at your mercy, under your control, just as if he was there to please you, though he still did take the command.

"Tom, please", you whine, not giving a care about sounding desperate anymore.

"Patient, my love. Wanna take my sweet time with you", he pats your leg so you can lift your hips to help him take off your shorts. "Cause that's what I appreciate doing with you. Take every single part of you, make you mine. Slowly". He brings you closer and you pant when he kisses the inner of your thigh, eyes never leaving yours. "Take care of my girl, as she deserves".

You feel yourself growing anxious as you tried to stay still when he brought his lips up to your core. "You smell so good, love. Can't wait to taste it". His lips make no hurry to reach your folds, hot breath hitting your aching center. He looks up at you, wicked smile, as his mouth hover you, teasing.

By this time, you’re already dripping, walls clenching around nothing for the expectation. Finally, you felt Tom's lips connecting with your pussy lips, skillful tongue smoothly licking your arousal, spreading it all over your core.

He put his tongue inside of you, tasting it, adoring the way you'd roll your eyes back with pleasure. "Sweet as fucking candy". He murmurs with his mouth against you, causing vibrations all over your cunt.

You moan when he flicks his tongue over your bud, and tug at his hair. The reaction comes right away and Tom moans against you, putting one of his fingers inside you, but not deep enough, waiting for you to adjust as your walls stretched deliciously. "Can feel you swallowing my finger, baby. You want me?”

"Tom", you whine, arching your back as Tom pushes his fingers deeper inside you. "Please. Gimme more".

"You want more, sweet girl?" Tom smirks, entering you as much as he could, adding a second finger to your pulsing core. You felt the cold of his silver ring against your hot skin, causing you to have goosebumps. Feeling you clench around him, Tom started fingering you, hands precisely moving to stuff you in the most raving way. He took his pace, fast enough to the sound of your wetness fill up the room.

He laps your bud once again, repeatedly, catching it between his lips once in a while and sucking, making you release a loud moan.

You tugged harder in his curls and that's when he realized you were close. "My beautiful girl is close? Can feel you clenching, baby."

You nod once, trying to catch your breath as your hips rock against his fingers. Tom took them out and you almost pulled his hair for that, but he soon replaced it with his firm tongue. "C'mon, darling, fuck yourself on my tongue".

You did so, not caring about your messed movements or your loud noises. Tom was right there, holding you hip down with one hand to keep you steady and stimulating your clit with his thumb with another. It was the most beautiful sight you could have and you were on the verge of your edge.

"You're- fuck, so fucking hot, Tom" you cry out, head falling back. "Shit! 'M close"

Tom started to fuck his tongue inside you again. Your toes curl, your belly burns and your heart couldn't beat faster. Tom grabbed the back of your legs and abruptly brought you closer to his face, keeping his tongue firm and thumb working on your bud. He replaced it with his two wet fingers for a moment, just to speak to you and coax your orgasm. “Look at you, baby, so, so beautiful when you’re coming. Fuck, wish they all could see what a pretty and dirty girl I’ve got right here, angel”.

You moan and Tom can tell you’re about to lose it, putting his tongue back to work. "That's it, love, cum on my tongue, make a sweet mess on my face".

You couldn't hold back anymore. Your whole body felt like sparkles, as you tightened your grip on Tom's hair, chest panting, muscles rigid, voice coming out as the loudest moan of your night. It’s all about you now, what you feel. Tom is right there, holding you, controlling your body squirming with his strong hands.

Tom helps you ride out your orgasm, tongue and fingers never leaving you. His noise bumped into your clit as he seemed to enjoy licking your juices, face still lost between your legs. But when you finally saw him again, you thought you could have another orgasm just from the look on his face.

"Fuck", you pant, still trying to catch your breath. "You're- you're all covered-"

Before you could even finish, Tom got up from his knees and took your face in between his hands, capturing your lips on his. The kiss was messy, clashing tongues and teeth, but it was all pleasure. You could taste yourself, take what Tom had left on his lips. It was sweet - a mix of both of you.

"You're a fucking mess right now" you tell him, a slight giggle coming out of your dry throat, wiping some of the wetness from his chin.

"I know", he smiles back at you, pecking your lips once more. He catches the fingers you used to clean his face and leads it to him mouth, sucking on them gently. "Proudly. Who else in this fucking world can have the pleasure of being a mess with your cum, eh?"

You shove his shoulders playfully and spin the chair. "Well, I think I could truly run things here. Feel very powerful now".

Tom puts his hand on the back of the chair to stop it from moving. "That's because you had me between your legs just a few seconds ago, love", he smirks "But I think we can manage that".

You get up from the chair and put your hands on the collar of his shirt, gripping it between your fingers. "Good", you look up at him, smiling devilishly. "First thing, though, I remember you were here to prove me something".

"Oh, darling" he chuckled darkly. "We surely are not finished yet".

[xsamsharons]

come here often? - n. lantsov

pairing: nikolai lantsov x healer!reader.

genre/warning: fluff. mentions of injuries.

words: 1.6k

summary: in which nikolai and you aren't really close, until he falls on his face and you fall in love.

It was a rather slow night considering you were working as the main healer aboard a ship that had the prince of Ravka as its captain and also counted the three leaders of the grisha triumvirate as part of the crew. Night after night, people would come in though the makeshift hospital David had built into your room for you, injured by the weirdest things you would ever imagine, and go back out to no doubt keep endangering their lives on behalf of their country. Now, you were not saying that fighting for your country was an dishonorable thing to do, the opposite actually, but for the life of you, you just couldn’t seem to understand how someone could possibly willingly jump off a ship and into an ocean filled with monsters and mythical creatures, and not expect any injuries.

Speaking of, as of right now you found yourself attending the injuries of none other but the captain himself, he looked like he hadn’t slept in ages, and reeked of sea water and sweat. The first time you had met him you had been extremely nervous about actually using your powers on him, after all, you didn’t wanna be known as the healer who had permanently injured the future king. That day you had learned that Nikolai became pretty delirious every time he was suffering from physical pain given as he had had a broken nose and damaged rib, but he had claimed that ‘the other guy had it worse’. This would’ve be a normal enough to say, except in this case, the ‘other guy’ was an ancient mythical being that has been believed to only exist in Ravkan’s passed down stories. Ever since then, he has been ending up in your room almost every night, and with your unfortunate luck, he always seemed to arrive right in your shifts.

His face was framed by messy strands that had fallen from his red tailored hair, and on his chest were displayed a couple of gold necklaces that matched the buttons of his red coat. He had been talking to you and distracting you from your work ever since he arrived, and to make matters worse, he had to rest on one of the beds in your room all night just in case the fall he had taken on his face somehow caused more damage than you had originally thought.

“So, you come here often?” he asked with a crooked smirk and wandering eyes.

“You mean my room? Where I work?” you answered, rolling your eyes when he nodded his head and raised his eyebrows, implying it was a totally logical question. “Yes, I come here often. Not as often as you it would seem. Quite prone to hurting yourself, aren’t you?”

“Maybe I just like to visit my favorite healer.”

Ah yes, the flirting. It seemed it wasn’t enough for him to already bother you with his presence, but he also made it his mission to flirt with you as much as possible during his stay.

“Firstly, I’m the only specialized healer you know, so that line isn’t as smooth as you think it is.” you started, continuing to work on his nose. “Secondly, I would appreciate it if you could keep your advances to the minimum. We don’t want you to damage your brain trying to come up with more pick up lines, seeing as it requires a lot of effort for you to even get coherent sentences out.” you said sarcastically and watched his smirk grow.

“What is it going to take for you to finally admit you actually really like me?” he asked, and for the life of you, you could not understand how he’d come to that conclusion when all you’ve ever done is turn him down. Nonetheless, you figured you’d follow his game. If you were going to spend your whole night by his side, you could use some fun.

“Well, for one, I have never seen you not beaten up, or showered for that matter, so that would be a great start.” you said, tailoring his nose to look like Sturmhond’s crooked one after you finished tending to it.

“It’s not my fault I always end up here in the nights when we get ambushed.” he said in a voice that could almost be considered as a whine, and you found yourself smiling at how cute he sounded when he wasn’t being an asshole. Still, you furrowed your brows in response to something he’d hinted at.

“Ambushed? What, like by other crews?” you asked and he nodded. “So, you tailor yourself to not get ambushed for being a royal, but we still are ambushed even when you look like Sturmhond? What’s the point then?”

“It may be kind of useless now that everyone in Ravka knows us, but I like pretending to be someone else sometimes.” he shrugged, a look that you’d never seen on his face appearing. “It’s stupid, i know” he snorted, trying to shake off the weight of his sentence after you remained quiet for a few seconds.

“It’s not stupid.” you were quick to deny. “I get it, believe me. Growing up as a grisha in Fjerda, I wished every night before bed to have the ability to simply be reborn as someone else.” you admitted, missing the shocked look on his face.

“You are Fjerdan?” he asked.

“What? That’s not in my file?” you answered with a question of your own and he rolled his green eyes.

After you accused him of violating your privacy for reading your file and he defensively said that it was his job to know his crew, you spent a few minutes teaching him Fjerdan words and took advantage of the little knowledge he had about your native language by making fun of his tailored face, knowing he couldn’t understand what you were saying.

“So, how come you praise yourself so much about your aim but seem to get beaten up every night?” you asked.

“Hey! I am actually an incredible shot, thank you very much.” he replied, offense clear on his voice, making you snort.

“Can’t be any good if the only times I ever see you is when you are injured.” you said sarcastically, and he made a face that seemed a bit dramatic in your opinion.

“Not my fault you are trapped between these four walls every night.” he replied, and now it was your turn to act defensively.

“Excuse you! I have a life outside of the hospital.” you said in a light tone, to let him know you weren’t truly offended.

“People who have lives don’t need to remind other people that they do.”

“People who are great in battle don’t need to remind other people that they are.”

“Touché.” he said with a smirk.

You spent the next couple of hours talking to Nikolai about random topics, him not failing to deliver a pick up line from time to time, and the night was slowly but surely starting to slip out of your hands. Right now, you were back to him being the topic of conversation after you had ranted for a couple of minutes about how hard it was to have to grow up in Fjerda hiding who you were. As you teased him telling him he had to settle for captain of a ship because he wasn’t a good enough royal (a claim he denied thoroughly), he looked like he wanted to say something else, before Genya entered the room with a smirk on her face.

“If you two lovebirds are done flirting, you are needed up on the main deck. Sparring session gone wrong - again.” she informed you, rolling her eyes at the usual recklessness of the crew.

“Yes, ma’am.” you saluted sarcastically, before turning back around to face Nikolai again and check his injuries one more time.

“You should actually stay upstairs with us sometime, that way I can prove to you that I'm actually good.” he suggested once Genya was out of the room again. “Plus, the day should be sunny today so we’ll probably spar a lot.”

“You’ve flirted with me every night you’ve been here and the answer’s always been the same, what makes you think tonight is going to be different?”

“Oh, come on. I promise I'll shower and I will try to not get punched in the face. That way you get to see me showered and not injured, it’s a package deal you can’t just ignore.” he pleaded, in reference to your words from earlier.

“All right, maybe I'll stay upstairs after I finish fixing the crew up, and if I catch sight of a certain arrogant royal I know, I might stick around to watch a sparring session or two.” you gave in with a smirk, leading him to the door so he could leave you alone to fix your room up a bit before you went upstairs.

“I’ll see you when I see you then.” he said while bowing his invisible pirate hat, and walked away with a wink.

He left you standing at your desk watching as, just like every other night, he slipped past your door and out onto the main deck again. You watched as he caught up with Genya and said something to her with a smirk, though you couldn’t quite catch the words the spoke, and turned back around to tidy up your room with a stupid smile on your face.

bonus:

“Did it work?” Genya asked him with raised eyebrows and a smile, her question in reference to the plan they had come up with to get Nikolai to spend more time with you. It consisted of Genya tailoring his face to look like he had fallen on his face and busted his nose open.

“Like a charm.” Nikolai nodded, a smile similar to the one you were wearing back in your room appearing on his face.

a/n: making fun of sturmhond's nose is a personality trait and it's mine (and alina's)

[meichenxi]

Ooh anything about linguistics and/or Chinese linguistics that interests you- what do you find most interesting?

Ooooo thank you! First let me apologise for the lack of rigour i.e. sources - I am ILL.

HMMMMM ok...let me talk a little bit about one thing I find fascinating - the idea of 'linguistic complexity'. It's an interesting topic that a) demonstrates the failures of linguistics that only takes Indo-European languages into account; b) demonstrates how a conflation of linguistic and moral judgements leads to absolute chaos; and c) proves that sometimes the purpose of all models and hypotheses is to be a useful aid in description, and not to be 100% accurate. Which means that multiple models can exist at the same time. Also, it shows just how cool Classical Chinese is.

I'm going to make this into two posts because I have been asked to wax lyrical on this stuff twice...this one will be a general overview of what linguistic complexity is and some of the issues around it, and the other post (@karolincki 's ask) will be an overview of these issues as pertaining to Modern and Classical Chinese.

Linguistic complexity: an introduction

What is linguistic complexity? Basically what it says on the tin: how 'simple' or 'complex' is one language in relation to another. If you automatically think that sounds dodgy - aren't all languages equally complex? what is a simple language? etc - just hold on. We'll get there.

A very important starting point: complexity here only refers to linguistic complexity. There are many ways to measure this, but broadly speaking it refers to the amount of stuff in a language a learner has to deal with. Are there genders? Well, that's more complex than not having any, because it's an extra thing to remember. Do you have to express whether the information you're conveying is something you personally experienced or hearsay? Again, more complex than not. Different tenses? Essentially, you can look at complexity like this: if you were describing this language or putting it into a computer program, what is the minimum length of description you would need? The longer the description, the more complex the language. In a standard understanding of complexity, a language like English is more complex than a language like Vietnamese (English has more tenses, moods, conjugations, irregularity...), and a language like Georgian is more complex than a language like English (Google a single verb table of Georgian and you will see what I mean).

(this will be long)

What complexity does not mean is anything to do with the cognitive abilities of the people who speak it. It doesn't mean that people who speak English are unable to conceive of the difference between a dual and a plural (2 apples and 3 apples), just because the language doesn't mark it. It doesn't mean people who speak Chinese are unable to conceive of the past conditional ('I should have gone...') just because they don't have a separate tense for it. It doesn't mean Italian speakers don't know whether they experienced the thing themselves, or heard about it from someone else, just because they don't have a set verb ending for it. All linguistic complexity means is what the language requires you to express.

I'm putting this out there very clearly because this sort of thinking is bound up in a lot of racist ideas and ideology. You'll have heard of the Sapir-Whorf hypothesis? Unfortunately named, since they never really worked together, and Edward Sapir was actually a relatively cool dude for the time who argued against linguistic relativity - i.e. the language you speak determines how you think. Yes, in the 19th (and much of the 20th) century, when certain linguists referred to 'simple' and 'complex' languages that is what many of them meant: speakers of a simple language are 'simple', and a complex one are 'complex'. But there was a huge backlash against these racist ideas, and that backlash was hugely influential is shaping the direction of typology (the branch of linguistics which is broadly concerned with these sorts of questions). More on that later, but for now: please understand that when I say linguistic complexity, I am not implying a single thing about the people that speak it.

Back to complexity. Of course language, like any system, is made up of moving parts: you don't just need to consider how many parts it has, but also how interdependent they are, whether they interact with each other in a predictable way, how likely they are to change. You might also want to consider how easy the system is to learn for somebody who has never used it before. And then, of course, languages are more complex still because they are not machines, but ever-changing things: do you count a rule like the conditional inversion in English, which only applies to a total of three verbs? Is that less complex because fewer verbs use it - and therefore you need to think about it less - or does that make the system more complex because you need another, meta-rule to say when you need to use it and when not? What about irregularity? Is a language like English that doesn't have many rules but has a sizeable amount of 'irregular' verbs more or less complicated than a language like Swahili which has a lot more rules, but follows them assiduously? And what happens when some people use one rule and others don't - do you count those as the same language (lumping), which may render the grand overview less accurate, or do you count them as totally separate languages (splitting), in which case when do you stop?

Hmm. Complexity. Is. Complex.

Those are a lot of factors that need to be considered here. Even saying something is 'irregular' doesn't mean very much without further quantification. For example, if I say that the 'irregular' verb ring goes to ring, rang, rung in English, you can very easily find other verbs which conjugate similarly: sing, sang, sung etc. So is that really irregular? Or is it just another, less productive rule? But then if it's a rule, why do we say fling, flung, flung and not yesterday I flang the ball? What's going on???

And what about 'total' irregularity, so called 'suppletion', where (and this is a very scientific explanation) a random non-related word just seems to appear in a paradigm, like it's got lost on the way home? Like I go, I went; like to be, I am, he is, I were; like good, better, best. Ok, so is the irregularity in I go and I went somehow....more irregular than irregularity in I sing and I sang? Uhh. Ok. And then is the irregularity in bad, worse, worst somehow more irregular than better and best, because at least for better and best you can see the -er and -st endings?? Finally, what about a 'spoken' but very predictable irregularity, such as the way we have a reduced vowel in 'says'? Where do we count that? Is that more irregular, or less irregular? Is it maybe 33% irregular?

I think you get the point. And of course all of this becomes more complex when you start to consider the interaction of lots of different systems at once. What about tone? If you have regular tone like Chinese, most people would agree that it's more complex because it's an added thing. But tone probably only developed in part as a response to losing some really important sound contrasts that other languages have kept...and also there is no possibilities of 'irregularities' in tone the way there are in something like verb conjugation...you can't just have a random sixth tone. And then what about syntax? If you have lots of very complex word ordering rules, is that more or less complex than a language where you have to rely on the human being to use pragmatics to infer what the ever loving fuck is going on?

Yeah. This is sort of just one of those things where every year a new linguist comes up with a spicy new matrix to 'measure' complexity and then everyone shits on them in journals and then comes up with their own idea which is promptly shat on. I don't know either.

Ok, so how is this relevant to Chinese?

To answer that question we need to circle round a bit to the history of typology that I vaguely alluded to earlier. At various points - depending on how racist the linguist in question was - people in the 20th century were starting to realise that all of this stuff about 'complex language = complex civilisation / complex thought' wasn't quite as water-tight as they'd hoped. Perhaps it was their better judgement, but it's also likely to have been influenced by a lot of contact suddenly with Native American languages - many of which are vastly complex by literally any metric you could possibly imagine, but the people speaking them were not colonising other countries and building amphitheatres and all of those necessarily, comfortingly European ideas of 'civilisation'. This movement away from such racist ideology, even if it was fuelled in part by a different type of racism, meant that suddenly everyone was very wary about making statements about linguistic complexity at all. It smacked of all the things they were trying not to be associated with.

I'm going to quote some Edward Sapir here for no other reason than I think it's really unfortunate that he's most famous for something that has the potential for incredibly racist ideology that he literally never said:

'Intermingled with this scientific prejudice and largely anticipating it was another, a more human one. The vast majority of linguistic theorists themselves spoke languages of a certain type, of which the most fully developed varieties were the Latin and Greek that they had learned in their childhood. It was not difficult for them to be persuaded that these familiar languages represented the “highest” development that speech had yet attained and that all other types were but steps on the way to this beloved “inflective” type. Whatever conformed to the pattern of Sanskrit and Greek and Latin and German was accepted as expressive of the “highest,” whatever departed from it was frowned upon as a shortcoming or was at best an interesting aberration. Now any classification that starts with preconceived values or that works up to sentimental satisfactions is self-condemned as unscientific. A linguist that insists on talking about the Latin type of morphology as though it were necessarily the high-water mark of linguistic development is like the zoölogist that sees in the organic world a huge conspiracy to evolve the race-horse or the Jersey cow.'

People generally began to get the hang of it after this, and stepped away from linguistic classification at all. There was a broad consensus that that sort of thing was done with, a thing of the past. It's kind of funny, because of course people's unwillingness to look at the complexity of language because 'all people are the same' shows that they still think language and culture/cognition are intimately linked! It was done out of a desire to not be racist, but you can't even reach that conclusion unless you have a sneaky secret bit of bioessentialism going on in your sneaky little brain. Because if the complexity of language doesn't reflect the complexity of your thought, why would it matter whether some systems are bigger than others? That they had more parts?

It literally wouldn't matter at all..

So what happened next? Linguists started to revisit these old linguistic classifications and ideas of complexity, but in the hope of proving, instead, that actually all languages were equal. You can definitely see the theoretical aims here: not only is a good from an ideological point of view (again, if you still equate linguistic complexity to complexity of thought), but it's also quite handy if you believe that all human babies approach language learning with the same biological apparatus ('Universal Grammar', if you believe in that, and other cognitive principles). If all babies have the same built-in gear, you sort of want the task they are given to be of roughly the same magnitude. That's one of those things linguists like to call theoretically desirable - which just means it would be neat if it did.

We're getting to Chinese. I promise.

So how you could make systems so vastly different as English and Georgian and Chinese roughly the 'same' level of complexity? One answer is irregularity: languages with huuuuuge verb and noun declensions like Georgian tend to have very little irregularity, where languages with less extensive systems like English tend to keep it around for longer. There are lots of reasons for this I won't go into, but it's a general trend. Irregular systems are more work for the brain to remember, which, predictably, is more 'complex' for a learner to acquire. Compare a language like English and German: German may have more cases and declensions and rules, but once you learn them...that's it. Compare that to English, where you'll be learning phrasal verbs and prepositions as a second language learner until the day you die (and possibly beyond). It's a different type of 'complex', but it's still deserving of the title.

That obviously doesn't work for a language like Chinese. Chinese has no conjugations, and so can't possibly have any irregularity in the same way. But fear not: there are lots and lots and lots of ways in which languages often exhibit what might be called 'complexity tradeoffs': languages with complex tone, for example, almost always have simpler sound systems elsewhere, and many languages with complex case arrangements tend to have free word order. One thing is complex, another...simplex (a word unfortunately genuinely in use).

This seems nice. We like this. It means that the different parts of the same system may be differently sized, but the whole system in total is about the same as any of other language. There’s just one problem: this isn’t how languages seem to work.

For every example of a complexity trade-off you can find, there are other languages which don’t have any such ‘trade off’ at all. There are plenty of languages where grammar is complex and the sound system is complex; or languages like Icelandic and German where there are cases but fairly rigid and fixed word order; or other cases where there is a huge amount of irregularity but also crazy verb systems, and so on. A language like Abkhaz has supposedly 58 consonants in the literary dialect: but it also has insanely complicated grammar. No trade-off there. Finally, it has long been presumed that whilst verb morphology etc is simpler in languages like Chinese, syntax would be more complicated: recently, a number of studies have proved exactly the opposite. Both, in fact, are simpler.

In conclusion, where does this leave us? Whilst the idea behind complexity trade-offs is well-motivated but not totally sound, and whilst these do not always seem to be present in the way you might hope, what this does do is force us as linguists to question whether we have spent enough time considering the types of complexity that are present in languages like Chinese, and how we reconcile that with more ‘familiar’ complexity. It’s interesting to think about because it shows what happens when you fail to consider these things.

That’s all for the overview on linguistic complexity today!! I’ll talk specifically about complexity in Chinese in the next ask, because this is already very long. Be aware, I’m not going to give you any answers necessarily - these questions are way above my pay grade - but boy can I give you some thoughts.

[blu-joons]

DATING NCT A⇴Z HEADCANON ⇴ Huang Renjun

A ⇴ AFFECTION

Renjun is very much a cuddler, he knows he’s not the tallest person in the world, but he sure feels tall when he’s able to wrap his arms around you and know that the feel of his body around yours helps to make you feel safe and loved.

B ⇴ BEFORE DATING

The two of you were sat beside each other one night when you were hanging out at the movies. Despite Winwin joining him, and your best friend at your side, the two of you soon found yourselves talking to each other as the adverts played before the movie and exchanging numbers once it had finished as well.

C ⇴ CONFESSION

To confess, Renjun decided to take you back to where it all began. It was a different film, but Renjun brought the same snacks and also chose the same seats for the two of you to watch a new release. This time around, he waited until the end of the movie to start talking to you and tell you how he felt. In that time, the cinema had cleared out, but Renjun was more than happy to leave things as the two of you for a little while.

D ⇴ DATES

When he can, Renjun likes to try and cook for you and show off the skills that he’s picking up on. It definitely doesn’t always turn out perfectly, but you can see the effort that he puts into it, and that’s what matters the most to him. Either whilst you eat or after, you’ll usually sit down and watch a movie with each other. At times, it’s hard to find a film that Renjun hasn’t watched before, but after searching high and low for a film, you’ll end up sitting down with your meal, somewhat paying attention to the film, and somewhat to each other too.

E ⇴ EXPERIENCE

As one of the elder members in Dream, Renjun knew that if he started dating then he’d have to make sure that it set an example to the others too. He didn’t want to rush things, Renjun was usually quite a calm and casual person anyway, and as he was learning so much anyway in dating you, he didn’t want to overwhelm himself, or you. Of course, WinWin would be a huge help in reassuring him too, whenever he did feel like the world of dating was surprising him, he would turn to his friend and offload and search for a bit of support and reassurance.

F ⇴ FIGHTING

Arguing is not something that is common between the two of you, Renjun is one of the main members who tries to keep a positive atmosphere and keep people smiling, and so fighting is definitely not something for him. Even during your fights, he never lets his anger show and tries to remain calm and smiley to also keep you relaxed too. He’s not someone that can deal with the tension after a fight either. It won’t be long before he reappears and tries to make things right between the two of you because he can’t cope with not being able to talk to you and move around the house knowing that you’re mad at him.

G ⇴ GETTING TO KNOW HIS FAMILY

Being an only child, you knew his family had high expectations for whoever his partner would be. You definitely felt the pressure too as you’d usually only speak to his family via video chat. Each time he spoke to his family, Renjun tried to get you involved so you had the most time available to you to get to know them all.

H ⇴ HOME

The two of you are very lucky that Jisung is understanding of the two of you and will often free up the dorm room if need be. However, Renjun can usually be found at your place instead as it’s a lot more private. After a few months together, Renjun will start spending more time at your place too, slowly moving in without either of you even noticing.

I ⇴ “I LOVE YOU”

At the end of a terrible prank on you, Renjun found himself saying, ‘I love you.’ He knew that he’d messed up bad, your face was a giveaway, and no matter what he did or said, you were silent. He knew they were three words he’d been waiting to say for a while anyway, and the only solution to get you to start talking to him again.

J ⇴ JEALOUSY

People’s opinions aren’t something that Renjun lets bother him too much, nor is he bothered by their actions either. If someone wants to try and make him jealous, he knows his sharp tongue can quickly shut them down before they get too far. It’s a relief to you to know that you have a bit more freedom to do whatever and know that Renjun won’t be jealous. He trusts you and knows that he can stand up for himself and your relationship if he has to if anyone even wants to try and overstep the mark with you.

K ⇴ KIDS

Again, as an only child, Renjun felt a slight weight on his shoulders to have children and continue the family line. He’ll definitely be open with you about having children and giving his parents grandchildren too. But you’re both young, so it will never be something that he’ll force you into deciding too much about just yet. His only hope is that by planting the seed early, you’ll be less scared in the future when children become a more serious topic.

L ⇴ LAUGHTER

Renjun loves to make sure that everyone around him is happy anyway, but his focus is always especially on you. He’s naturally funny, and he knows that he can use that to his advantage too which you soon learn first-hand. If he annoys you or frustrates you, it’s only a matter of time before the perfect joke is uttered by him and the smile is back on your face again. A positive environment is of great importance to Renjun, he always likes to make sure that everyone is enjoying themselves whenever they’re around him.

M ⇴ MISSING

Being one of the older members, Renjun doesn’t want to let the other Dream members see him missing you too much, he prefers to be there for them to have to rely on them to be there for him. Throughout most of the day he can usually keep himself composed quite well, but the moment he gets a text or call from you, then his heart will begin to pound a little bit harder. If he’s touring with NCT U, then he’ll open up a little more about his feelings as one of the younger members, knowing that the elder members are always there for him and always keeping a close eye on him too whenever they’re away from home.

N ⇴ NICKNAMES

Renjun loves to use Chinese nicknames whenever he’s addressing you. The language is something you’re keen to pick up on anyway, so he’ll often teach you new words by addressing you with a new nickname each time.

O ⇴ OBSESSION

He’s obsessed with your kind heart. Your support is what means the most to Renjun, and you give him that and so much more out of the goodness of your heart.

P ⇴ PDA

Affection in public is usually quite playful as far as Renjun is concerned. He’s not afraid for someone to watch the two of you if he decides to start pinching at your waist or squeezing your shoulders a little too tight. He knows that it always makes you blush which just makes it a whole lot funnier for him too.

Q ⇴ QUESTIONS

Living with Renjun is pretty chaotic, so you’re usually having to ask him to tidy up a bit more or move his things from lying around. You never imagined one person could live so messily until you started living with him.

R ⇴ RANDOM FACTS

In his spare time, Renjun likes to give drawing a go, and so he’ll often find himself making sketches of you. They’re something that he’d never show to you as he’s quite shy about his drawings, but he loves to draw up photos of you he’s taken or recreate memories that he can recall the two of you making in the form of a drawing. His sketchbook is kept very safe from everyone, but he loves to fill it with little doodles and edits.

S ⇴ SEX

He loves to tease you whenever the two of you get intimate and try and push a few of those boundaries, but he always makes sure to do it with an innocent smile on his face. He can see your frustrations growing at times, but he shrugs as if he’s doing nothing wrong. When he does this, you’ll always make sure to get revenge on him and prove to him how it isn’t nice to tease when someone wants something so badly.

T ⇴ TEXTS

Renjun will often text you throughout his day so that the two of you can make plans for that evening. As messy as he is, he likes for his schedule to be organised and make sure that everything for your time together can be perfect.

U ⇴ UNIVERSE

As far as Renjun was concerned, you were his best friend. He never really imagined love being something that was missing from his life, but when he met you, he realised it was something important to him, more than anything else.

V ⇴ VACATION

When the time came for Renjun to be able to go on vacation, there was only one place he wanted to go. You knew more than anyone how badly he wanted to go home for a while, but when he asked you to join him on the trip, you were more than surprised. Of course, you said yes, excited to see where Renjun grew up too.

W ⇴ WHINING

If you stop laughing at him, then Renjun will definitely start to whine. It’s not because he wants the attention necessarily, but just to know that you’re doing fine.

X ⇴ XXXXX

Your cheeks are definitely Renjun’s favourite place to kiss, when you’re feeling sad, he’ll be able to kiss against them when you bury your head in your hands, or when you’re happy, he’ll be able to kiss along your laughter lines and your blushed cheeks. They’re the perfect spot for any emotion that you’re feeling, annoyed, embarrassed, angry, or over the moon, he’ll always kiss against your cheeks before anywhere else.

Y ⇴ YOU

You were his sidekick, at his side throughout everything he did in life.

Z ⇴ ZZZ

Every night, without fail, Renjun loves to fall asleep with you nice and close to him. Feeling your body curl into his side makes him smile like nothing else and feel comfortable enough to fall asleep, knowing that you’re right there with him.

---

Masterlist

[cyoc49]

HIMBO Magazine: Changing Departments

*click! click! click! click!*

Derek listened to the camera flash as he sat on the side of the bed. He was currently doing a photo shoot for HIMBO magazine, a fashion and lifestyle magazine “for the modern gay male™”. Fake blood dripped against his chest - they were doing some Halloween type of shoot. But let’s be honest, the blood wasn’t the focus of the shot: it was his body. Derek had never been the best student - and his attitude certainly didn’t help - but if there was one thing he knew how to do, it was make his body look as sexy as humanly possible. Derek scoured nutrition blogs to make sure he stayed up to date on everything related to fitness, and the dedication showed itself in his beautiful, sculpted body. Sitting here with no shirt on and wearing a pair of lethally tight skinny jeans, he looked like every gay man’s wet dream. To put it simply, Derek was hot as hell; problem is, he knew he was hot at hell.

“Alright, that’s good. I think we have what we need, thank you Mr. Hale” the director said. Derek stood up and two twinkish looking assistants came over to remove the blood. Derek stood still and tried to ignore the two obviously gay men putting their hands all over his body. Derek was the kind of guy who thought all gay men were jumping at the bit for any man they can find. Doing a photo shoot for a gay magazine was certainly not his dream, but hey: a paycheck is a paycheck.

After he was cleaned off, Derek put on a t shirt and enjoyed the feeing of it stretched tight against his pecs. He slung a Louis Vuitton backpack over his shoulders. All he had to do was collect his check and he could be done with this homo magazine. Derek headed towards the doorway connecting the studio space to the rest of the offices. He turned the corner into the hallway, only to immediately crash into someone coming from the opposite direction. Papers went flying.

Derek hesitated, then reluctantly crouched down to help the man pick up his papers. As he did, the man spoke to him in a deep voice “You know, you should really watch where you’re going. People are busy around here.”

This was the remark that set Derek off. It was enough that he had done a photo shoot outside his comfort zone, and ran into someone while he was leaving, but now he was being sassed by some worker who couldn’t slow down enough to watch out for passers. Derek had had enough of this magazine. “You know,” he said, “I’m surprised. I thought you fags would be more excited to slam into other guys.”

Derek could sense the shift in mood immediately. All the workers around him who had been buzzing about immediately stopped and looked at th scene. The office had gone dead silent. As Derek looked around at all the men staring at them, the man he had bumped into finished collecting his papers and stood up, allowing Derek to finally look at him properly. Woah, this was a fine looking man. Strappingly tall and ruggedly handsome. He filled out his expensive-looking three-piece suit perfectly. His whole demeanor was one of absolute confidence. Finally, Derek realized what had happened. He hadn’t bumped into some random employee. He had knocked over and subsequently cussed out the boss of the whole place.

*Well*, Derek said to himself, *I fucked up bad this time*.

The boss was surprisingly well-composed for someone who had just been called a slur, Derek thought. As if to prove this point, the boss suddenly started laughing. It was a good, deep laugh. And when he laughed, everyone else in the building laughed along with him. Derek stared at everyone in the office in confusion. Why did they find this so funny? Was it because he’s their boss? And they were all looking at the boss with such admiration. Derek just hoped this meant the issue would blow over and he could leave before embarrassing himself sooner.

But before he could step away, he was spoken to. “I used to get really angry when people said stuff like that to me,” the boss explained in a rich, inviting voice, “now it just makes me sad, because I see all the failed potential hiding behind that language.”

Derek took a little offense to that last statement, but he knew he was in no position to argue right now. It seemed like the laughter was the all-clear the rest of the office needed to know their boss was okay, because the normal hum of voices and keyboards had returned. Now it was just him and the extremely powerful man he had pissed off. Derek broke the silence. “Look, Mr...”

“Christian Le Maítre” the gorgeous boss informed him, “Editor in Chief of HIMBO magazine. But everyone around here just calls me Mr. M.”

“Right. Well, uh, Mr. M, I’m really sorry about-“

“No you’re not.” Christian cut him off without missing a beat. “I’ve seen so many models like you come and go through these halls. You think you’re hot shit, and take pity on all of my boys in this office who had to take desk jobs because their bodies weren’t nice enough to let them get by on looks alone. But you know, we’re hard workers here. And we’re a close knit family.”

Derek objected to being interrupted, but as Christian talked, he felt his defenses melt away with every word. Mr. M was right, Derek realized. I am a narcissistic asshole who holds myself above others. He had never felt like this before. But everything Mr. M said just seemed right. When this gorgeous, confident man spoke, Derek realized he was speaking the truth.

“What’s your name, son?” Mr. M asked him.

“D-Derek, sir. Derek Hale.” Derek was never one stutter, but how else could he feel right now?

“Well Derek, I’m sure our lame little office doesn’t fit your macho man swagger persona, but I think you’d find that working here is pretty great.”

Was that an offer? Derek didn’t know. He had completely forgotten the context of their conversation, and indeed his reason for being in this office in the first place was slowly becoming a distant memory. All Derek knew in this moment was that he HAD to work at HIMBO. In fact, he couldn’t imagine life without working here.

Derek tried to compose a response, but was increasingly timid in the presence of this incredible man. “Well, uh, Mr. M. Perhaps if you have any opening I might be able to, uh-”

Mr. M just laughed again, and this time Derek laughed right along with him.

“Well I’m shocked to hear you change your tune so quickly, but I can’t say I’m surprised. Working here is kind of a dream job, if I do say so myself. But there’s no need to submit your CV and go through the traditional channels. I am actually prepared to offer you a job on the spot.”

Derek felt his ears burning. How lucky was he! To be offered a job at the best company on earth. He would take it immediately!

“Mr. M, it would be an honor to work for you” Derek bowed his head as he said this. Respect was important, especially for the man who was giving him a job no questions asked.

“Glad to hear it, sport! Now full disclosure, it’s a clerking position. I know, not the most exciting stuff, but here at HIMBO we believe even the most mundane work can be made magical! Of course, you would have to change a few of your behaviors to *best* fit the position. Your ego, your hot-headedness. Do you think those are things good for a clerk to have?”

“No, sir” Derek said with convocation. “Anything you want me to change, I will change.”

Christian cracked a smile, as if Derek had said something unintentionally funny. “Well I admire your commitment. It’s just, clerks are so straight-laced and serious, and you are such a character, Derek. Mr. Macho Man with a great body. Actually, I do like this body.” Christian looked Derek up and down, “I think that can stay. But as for everything else, well, I can take care of that.”

Christian stopped talking and instead just looked at Derek. The hopeful employee stood there silently, unsure of what to do. Just then, he suddenly felt a draining feeling. It wasn’t his muscles or his IQ or any of that stuff that he felt fading away, it was more like he was losing... his personality? All the pride Derek felt over his hot body and great life was disappearing. All the anger he get towards people not like him, slipping away. But it wasn’t replaced by new emotions, it wasn’t replaced by anything. Derek stopped feeling strong feelings about much of anything. He liked his job, he followed the news, but he had never had any opinions of his own. Never tried to be individual or stand out. Derek was becoming like his new favorite flavor of ice cream: vanilla.

As Derek’s personality slowly morphed him into a contender for the World’s Most Dull Man, his wardrobe changed to follow suit. His designer t shirt loosened out a bit. The sleeves grew down his arms before spouting buttons and cuffs. Buttons also sprouted down the middle, and the shirt gained a collar, becoming a basic button-up shirt. A white plaid pattern spread across the shir. At the same time, Derek felt his skinny jeans go “pah” as all the tightness shrugged out of them, changing them into (gag) regular fit pants. They lightened to gray and changed material to thin cotton, becoming work slacks. His new plaid shirt automatically tucked itself into the pants, and a brown leather belt formed around his waist, with his expensive designer sneakers morphing into brown leather dress shoes to match. The LV backpack he wore fell as one of the straps broke off, before disappearing altogether. The remaining strap lengthened and slung itself over his shoulder, and the bag itself shifted into a basic messenger bag, holding plenty of important documents and paperwork.

For a brief moment, Derek felt confusion and fear. Why were these changes happening to him? Where did his nice stuff go, and what were these boring-ass clothes replacing them? These thoughts only lasted for half a second, before Derek realized how right this was. This was his style, or more accurately his *lack* of style. Derek had never cared about trends, or getting fancy new clothes. As long as they fit him well and looked professional enough for work, that was all that mattered in Derek’s eyes. A Ross Membership Card popped into his wallet to cement this change.

Derek felt something in his pocket, and pulled out a pair of black-rimmed glasses. These were the glasses he needed to see, of course. Derek opened them up and put them on. To follow suit, his hair parted itself to the side and became thick with gel holding his new professional haircut in place.

As promised, Christian had left Derek his body, but had taken basically everything else from him. Where there had once stood an arrogant, trendy mode, there was now a walking turtleneck. Normally in cases like this, Derek would sprout new memories of his new life. But no memories came, because Derek didn’t really *have* a life. He was now a total office drone. From 9-5 he worked faithfully for HIMBO, and after that he went home and solved jigsaw puzzles until it was time for bed... except on the nights where Mr. M invited Derek to his house. Derek truly wanted nothing more from life.

Christian smiled at the new corporate boy that stood before him. “Okay I think you’ve handled the onboarding process well, Dirk. Dirk, isn’t it?”

“Yes sir.” Dirk replied matter of factly. Dirk Kent. Filing clerk for HIMBO magazine.

“Great! But there’s actually one more thing I need from you. I’m still a little raw about that comment of yours earlier, and I would hate for it to taint our working relationship with each other, so allow me to bury this hatchet.”

Christian snapped his fingers, and Dirk felt his impressive manhood shrink, and shrink, and shrink, until he heard a “pop!” sound and knew that it was no more. Poor Dirk was smooth as could be in his private areas. But he didn’t mind: being unable to orgasm helped him focus on his work. And besides, if Mr. M needed help Dirk still had two perfectly serviceable holes on him.

Christian laughed again, eliciting another laugh from Dirk. “Dirk, pal, I don’t think I have ever been happier with one of my new hires. But you know, I do seal my deals with a kiss.”

“Why thank you sir!” Dirk replied with enthusiasm, as he allowed Christian to walk over, turn up his chin, and plant a kiss on his lips. And it was the greatest kiss Dirk had ever felt. Indeed, it was the only kiss he had ever felt, but as far as kisses go it was still pretty spectacular. As Dirk stood there with his lips pressed against those of his incredivle boss, he knew there was nothing more he would want from life.

As they parted, Derek looked hopefully up at his boss “Where should I start with my work, sir?” He lived to work.

Christian smiled again. “I’ll film you in on that in a minute, but let me take you to your desk. You’ll be down in the accounting department. In fact, I think you’ll be desk neighbors with our other new hire Bartholomew! You’ll love him. A total nerd but a sweet kid regardless.” Without warning, Christian turned and walked down the hall. He didn’t need to say anything. Dirk instinctively followed him, just as he instinctively obeyed every command Mr. M gave him. Life was easier that way.

[unbridgeabledistances]

prompt: domestic gallavich/being intimate in a nonsexualway bc there’s like 3 weeks til the next episode 😐

your wish is my command, anon!<3 i decided to tie this into next ep bc i simply cannot HANDLE mickey’s outfit/big gay metamorphosis & i needed to create the scene that inspired it so i wrote this

a one-shot bridging 11x06 and 11x07 in which ian and mickey talk about “gay friends,” ripped jeans, and do a bit of processing along the way

tw for brief mention of homophobia/abuse (bc terry lol)

--

“How come we don’t have any, like, gay friends?”

Ian looked up from where he was laying on the ground, breathing heavily after a series of push-ups, a nightly routine that he was trying to keep intact even though he and Mickey were practically driving the entire circumference of Chicago every day to make weed deliveries from dawn til dusk, leaving them both exhausted. It had been a week since all the shit with Terry, and a month or so since he and Mickey had started the security gig; while months ago their evenings would be spent sitting side by side on the bed in a brittle silence while Ian read or scratched in his notebook and Mickey played games on his phone blasting at full volume in the pajamas he’d been wearing all day, these days the evenings in their bedroom were softer and warmer— like they were settling into the space together, like they were both on the same team instead of constantly clashing and butting heads while trapped in a too-small space. These days, after having dinner in the clamor of the crowded kitchen, he and Mickey would head upstairs and change out of their uniforms, and Ian would work out while Mickey mostly just lounged on the bed, sometimes making commentary and watching him bob up and down with a pensive smirk or scrolling through his phone.

But tonight, Mickey was quiet— his eyes flickered to the curves and edges of Ian’s torso every now and then as Ian broke a sweat, but otherwise he wasn’t playfully poking and prodding like usual.

Mickey had been a lot quieter in general this week, after all the stuff with Terry— Ian knew seeing the source of all of Mickey’s trauma in a wheelchair immobile from the neck down, the most vulnerable Terry could have been, felt worse than someone repeatedly twisting a knife in Mickey’s abdomen. But beyond the initial shock and the almost-murder and lugging him up the stairs, having Terry in a wheelchair twenty feet away did something deeper to Mickey. This whole situation shifted something solid that had been lodged in the pit of Mickey’s stomach for years— Ian could see it, and he fucking hated it. He hated Mickey’s glassy contemplative eyes as he looked out the car window while they drove to a new dropoff location, lost in his head when he thought Ian wasn’t looking. He hated the tightly wound tension between Mickey’s shoulder blades as he slept, curled into himself and twisted in the comforter, facing away from Ian on the other side of the bed. He hated the tight smiles Mickey gave him as he made some offhand joke about Terry when they could hear him cursing and shrieking through the open front windows, smiles that were trying to prove something outwardly but showed the barbed pain stinging at Mickey’s insides. Ian poured out what he could in soft touches, in skims of fingertips at the breakfast table and in an arm over Mickey’s waist while they slept; but he could only give as much as Mickey would take, and for most of the week Mickey had shut everyone out with iron walls.

Ian couldn’t imagine what was stirring in Mickey’s mind; he’d seen some of Mickey’s trauma firsthand, sure, and some of the stories about Terry came slipping through the cracks when Mickey’s guard was down— mostly on those late nights when they both couldn’t sleep and Mickey whispered into the crook of Ian’s neck as they were curled into each other, cradled in the dark silence of their bedroom. But Ian knew there was deeper shit that he hadn’t heard about, and he could see the constant fear of Mickey’s adolescence hanging heavy around his neck all these years later. But Mickey didn’t need anyone to push his walls down— Ian knew he’d open up when he was ready.

Which is why this random question, the most direct statement Mickey had really made to him all week, caught Ian off guard. He sat up, folding his arms over his legs and staring up at where Mickey was slouching on the bed, propped up by a pillow he’d shoved between his back and the wall. “Gay friends?” he asked, more than a little confused.

Mickey cleared his throat. “Yeah, gay friends, y’know. Like all your youth center queers that came to the wedding or whatever.” He suddenly looked down and picked at a fraying thread on his shirt sleeve, not meeting Ian’s eyes.

Ian raised an eyebrow in curiosity. This was random, sure, but Mickey wouldn’t have brought it up if something wasn’t weighing on him, bubbling up after all the events of this week.

“I don’t know— I guess since the pandemic and stuff, I haven’t really kept in touch with Geneva or any of those guys who came to our wedding. We only really talked after I got out of prison because of all the Gay Jesus publicity bullshit, but after you got out I wasn’t really thinking about that as much.”

Mickey blew out a breath, so quietly Ian barely noticed it. Ian stood, wiping his sweaty forehead and plopping down on the bed next to Mickey, folding his legs so their knees were almost touching— but still giving him space, still letting him breathe.

“Why’re you asking?”

“Don’t know, really. Just thinkin’.” Mickey picked at his shirt sleeve again, then flickered his gaze up to meet Ian’s eyes, two clear pools of glassy blue. “Thinkin’ about what life could’ve been like. If I wasn’t scared shitless of who I was for so long.”

Ian felt something twist in his gut, the same queasy pang of pain that always resurfaced whenever he saw Mickey like this, whenever he was reminded of all the unspeakable agony that Terry had put him through.

“It’s fucked up that you didn’t get to be who you were for so long, Mick,” he breathed, knowing that statement didn’t cover the amount of things that were fucked up about this situation.

Mickey ran his teeth over his bottom lip, like he was concentrating. “Yeah.”

Ian let them sit there for a second. It seemed like Mickey wanted to say more, but something in him was frozen solid. After a moment, Ian tried to break the tension.

“Hey, for the record, I’ve had lots of gay friends and you aren’t missing much. There’s lots of PC bullshit that’s important but took me fucking forever to learn— and even then, I never really felt like I totally belonged.” He gently nudged Mickey’s ribcage. “I guess that’s why I forgot about everyone, between work and getting to be with you all the time— I’d rather eat pizza in the mall food court with you than go to some boujee fucking café with the youth center people any day.”

The corner of Mickey’s mouth ticked upwards slightly. “Yeah. Guess you’re right.” His fingers went slack around the threads on his shirtsleeve he’d been picking at. “You don’t… miss it though? Bein’ around people who’re like us?”

Ian paused for a moment, imagining the youth center crew in the same room as Mickey— it would be fucking comical, like people speaking two different languages, like astronauts trying to communicate with aliens on Mars through gestures and confused looks. But that was just because Mickey didn’t know how to speak that language— he’d been kept shrouded in an abusive household with daily death threats for years, and then stowed away in prison where he didn’t have the chance to go to fucking brunches and clubs and education events like Ian could. Ian got the chance to learn all that shit— it wasn’t Mickey’s fault that he never did, and if it was anyone’s, it was all Terry’s.

Ian’s eyes flickered to Mickey’s face— he looked vulnerable and split open, like he was drifting away in all the possibilities of what could have been. When he answered, Ian spoke softly, carefully.

“I mean… I guess I do. There were nice parts of going out with people, or even those after-parties back when I used to work at the club. There’s something nice about being with your people, where you can make jokes about stuff or talk about deep shit and everyone’s on the same page. It’s hard to find that around here.” Ian tentatively crawled his hand over the blanket, letting it rest on Mickey’s knee. “S’there anything else going on?”

Mickey raised his thumb to his mouth, biting at a hangnail contemplatively. “Dunno, man. Just thinking. How it might be nice, to have friends like us. I used to be scared of hangin’ with other queers, but I think that was just some deep bullshit with Terry.” He looked up to meet Ian’s eyes. “It’d be nice to stop… hating that part of myself, or whatever.”

Ian smiled, reaching to intertwine his fingers with Mickey’s and tracing a pattern with the thumb that was free from their grasp on Mickey’s inner thigh, a soft touch of validation that Ian hoped would soak into Mickey’s skin.

“I think so too.” Ian watched the corner of Mickey’s mouth curve upwards. “I can definitely hit up some of the people I used to hang with, and see if they wanna get coffee or something? With the two of us? Only if you want.”

Mickey nodded— then chuckled a breathy laugh, like he was relieved. “Fuck it. Yeah.”

Ian couldn’t help it; Mickey looked so fucking sweet and so relieved that he had to press a kiss to the top of his head. Mickey squirmed underneath him, bristling like a cat that didn’t want to be pet like he did with most of Ian’s soft touches— but Ian just grinned and doubled down, pressing another slower peck onto Mickey’s temple. Mickey blew out a slow breath.

“Don’t know what I’d fuckin’ wear to a brunch with a bunch of Northside do-gooder gays,” he said after a moment, his voice wavering so slightly that no one except Ian would have noticed.

Ian rolled his eyes fondly, giving Mickey’s hand a quick pulse of a squeeze. “Mickey, are you kidding? Wear whatever the fuck you want. You don’t need to change yourself, that’s kind of the whole point.”

“Yeah. Fuck. Guess it is.” Mickey was quiet for a moment, but still chewing on his bottom lip, like he was building the courage to say something more. Ian could tell— he let the comfortable silence hang between them, knowing that Mickey would break it when he was ready.

“D’you think it’d be stupid if I, like, tried to… jazz up my look a bit?” He darted his eyes nervously to Ian’s face, down to their clasped hands, and then back to the covers again. “Like, uh— I don’t know. Maybe wore some shit that didn’t have holes in it. With patterns, or whatever.”

Ian felt his face split into a grin. Patterns, or whatever— god, he loved his dumbass husband so fucking much. He pressed another kiss to Mickey’s cheek— this time Mickey didn’t flinch away, his only resistance a forced roll of his eyes.

“Mick, I don’t think that’s stupid at all. I think you should dress however makes you feel good.”

“’Kay.” Mickey pursed his lips, like he was still hesitant. Ian rubbed his thumb over the back of Mickey’s hand, their fingers still clasped and hanging limply in Mickey’s lap. The silence was hanging again, and Ian could still feel the tight waves of anxiety bouncing off of Mickey. He took in a breath.

“I could… help you, y’know. If you wanted to dress a certain way. At the very least I could gas you up and tell you how hot you look.” Ian paused, smirking and running his eyes over Mickey’s torso. “But I could also help you pick shit out, or whatever. We could order some stuff online.”

Mickey looked up at him, his eyes oddly relieved and open in a way they hadn’t been in days. “Yeah?”

Ian softly smiled. “Yeah. Only if you want to. You’re you, and you don’t have to pretend to be anyone else. I love the way you look— hell, it drives me crazy, Mick. But— if you feel like you aren’t dressing the way that makes you feel the best, or like you’re putting on an act for other people and you don’t want to anymore— then we can figure this out.”

This time it was Mickey that initiated affection, lifting their clasped hands and pressing a quick ghost of a kiss to Ian’s wrist. Ian smiled in acknowledgement, then playfully raised his eyebrows. “You wanna look online now? I’m done working out and more than happy to help you gay up your look.”

Mickey unclasped their hands, playfully shoving Ian squarely in the chest. “Fuck you.” Then, in an uncharacteristic move from the way Mickey had been flinching away from his touches all week, Mickey leaned in closer to Ian’s chest, nestling his back on Ian’s sternum and reaching for his phone that was discarded on the blanket beside him. “Alright, hot stuff. Where’re we fucking shopping?”

Ian grinned and snapped the waistband of Mickey’s sweatpants playfully, shuffling underneath him and getting comfortable.

“’Kay, let me think. I used to order a bunch of shirts and stuff from Primark when I was going out with the youth center people. They have good denim, too.”

Mickey’s bottom lip was caught between his teeth again while he listened. He hesitated for a moment, his thumb hovering over the phone’s keyboard— then, in an automatic movement, he quickly shoved his phone into Ian’s hand, cheerfully wriggling back into Ian’s chest. Ian smirked and unlocked the phone, happy to take the reins— online shopping for fashion was clearly lightyears out of Mickey’s comfort zone.

Ian navigated over to the Primark homepage, plastered with torsos of toned models wearing striped button ups and ripped jeans. His thumb pressed down onto the “denim” tab, and he started to slowly scroll through the rows of options, holding the phone so Mickey could see.

“I don’t know what you really want, but they’ve got pretty cheap pants and shit that’re good quality…” Ian let his voice trail off, speaking softly to where Mickey was lying on his chest in a voice that he knew was tickling the shell of Mickey’s ear. Mickey almost seemed… nervous, or at the very least paralyzed by the wealth of options. He raised his thumb to his mouth, anxiously biting the hangnail again.

“I guess those ripped ones don’t look too bad.”

Ian clicked on the picture Mickey was referring to. They were black jeans, a dark wash and skinny cut, with patches ripped on both knees. Ian felt something well in his chest, probably an overreaction to a pair of jeans— but these jeans were perfect for Mickey. They weren’t too much, weren’t overly fashionable, but they still felt more clean-cut than the baggy pants Mickey usually threw on. These jeans were badass, and totally aligned with Mickey’s don’t-fuck-with-me vibe, but they were deliberate. Stylish. Like they were saying here the fuck I am.

“Yeah?” Ian knew Mickey could tell he was smiling from his voice.

Mickey smirked, craning his neck and turning to look up at Ian. “Yeah. Think I can pull ‘em off?”

Ian pressed his lips together. “Fuck yeah. You’re gonna look so good.”

Mickey just gave a satisfied smile, and nestled back against Ian’s chest again. “Let’s get ‘em, then.”

[darthkruge]

hey could you do a jess mariano x reader where the reader has dyslexia but loves to read. someone at school makes a comment about her being dumb and she gets insecure but jess is super reassuring to the reader about how intelligent she is. also they can either be already dating or have mutual crushes. whatever you think fits better. <3

Jess Mariano x Dyslexic!Reader ~ All of You

Summary: Someone at school insults the dyslexic reader and their boyfriend, Jess, provides reassurance. 

Warnings: Bullying, language, insecurities, I think that’s it? 

Words: 2.1k

A/N: Hey!! I’m so, so sorry this took me so long to get to! I hope you don’t mind, I didn’t mean to keep you in the ask box void. I really enjoyed writing this, so thank you for requesting! I decided to make them already be dating because that’s where my brain went hehe. I hope you like it :)

You walked to school hand-in-hand with your boyfriend, as always. Even though it took him about 15-20 minutes out of the way, Jess never missed walking with you. He hated the thought of you starting your day by yourself and never wanted you to feel forgotten about or lonely. Thus, the tradition began and it has stayed the way you start your day, everyday, for the last few months that you’ve been dating. 

Jess pulled you behind the science building, pressing his lips to yours. Your hands instinctively wove into his hair and his arms wound around your waist, pulling your bodies together. He smiled into the kiss before pulling away from your lips and gently moving his kisses down the side of your neck. You hummed in content before moving to meet his face again, once again pressing your lips to his. 

These stolen moments were what you lived for. You’d never felt too confident in yourself, at least as far as relationships went, and you weren’t used to this kind of affection. Even so, you loved every moment of it. Everything with Jess felt so natural. No matter what, you came first to him and he never failed to show it. 

You both pulled away and he softly kissed your forehead.

“See you after second period?”

“Of course” 

“Okay, love. Text me if you need me. Or if you’re bored. Or if you miss me”

“Oh, yes! That Jess Mariano charm. I’m not sure how I’ll endure two classes without it!”

“I’m sure it’ll prove quite e difficult,” Jess said, laughing. The bell rang and he gave you one last smile before you parted. 

You walked into your English class with a smile on your face, giddy after the experience with him. He made you feel alive. It was the kind of feeling you didn’t know you needed, but once you felt it you couldn’t imagine losing it. 

You sat down in your seat, waiting for the teacher to start class. 

“Okay, everyone. Today we’re just going to be doing some silent reading for the first half of class and then I’ll put you in small groups to work on a new project”

Fuck. Group projects were the fucking worst. Unless you got one of your friends, people were normally assholes and impossible to work with. 

Even though you were upset with the new development, you were excited to have time to read. You pulled out your copy of The Great Gatsby that Jess had lent you and picked up where you last left off. Because you read so much and generally did well or at least half-decent in school, people never assumed you had dyslexia. Lots of people had this false narrative that if you have dyslexia, you must hate reading. It was something you were used to, the stupid comments and assumptions. You tried to not let it get to you but you sometimes felt frustrated. You’d run into loads of ignorant people in your life and while you weren’t ashamed to have dyslexia, you hated having to explain it to every new teacher, every new friend in your life. You never knew how’d they’d react.

Even so, reading was one of your greatest joys in life. Losing yourself in the work, in the story, it was enthralling. You loved to find characters that you connected with. Their emotions were palpable and made you feel validated and less alone. Reading was one of the main things that brought you and Jess together. He knew you had dyslexia and, thankfully, never treated you like you were any less. You were afraid he would break up with you once you told him, but, of course, he didn’t. You were still you, and that’s all he cared about. 

He loved trading books with you and hearing your thoughts on them. In doing so, he felt the two of you were brought closer together. Discussing literature was an almost intimate experience in your relationship. Learning which characters and themes resonated with a person was truly illuminating about their personality and mind. Right now, as you read Gatsby, Jess was reading Pride and Prejudice. You loved Jane Austen, as did Jess, and you completely enjoyed discussing her work. 

After a few moments lost in thought, your teacher’s voice pulled you back to the present. “Alright! Okay so for the group project you will be analyzing the short story “The Lottery” by Shirley Jackson. Please read it together today and discuss what you think the most pertinent theme is. I’ve already assigned the groups and I’ll display them on the board right now.”

Your teacher stepped back and turned on the projector so you could see the groups. Scanning for your name, you internally groaned when you saw who you were with. Sarah, Justin, and Alex. They were all close and their friend group didn’t exactly have the best reputation. You grabbed your bag, walked over to them, and sat down.

“So, y’all just wanna read it? Then just talk about it, I guess. We’re looking for themes, right?” Sarah asked.

Everyone nodded, opening up the copies of the short story placed on your desks. You jumped in and immediately felt yourself pulled into the writing. After a few minutes, your eyes glued to the story, you heard the rest of your group closing their packets. 

“Alright, everyone done?” Justin asked.

“Yeah, you?” Alex said

Sarah nodded in agreement.

You, on the other hand, felt your cheeks flush. You were only about 70% through the story. “Sorry, I just need a bit more time, is that okay?”

“Ugh, fine, whatever. Just hurry up,” Sarah groaned. 

Your face burning, you went back to the reading. It wasn’t like you weren’t trying, you were! They just wouldn’t understand it. You couldn’t count the amount of times people had told you to just “focus more”. It made your blood boil, honestly. It was so dismissive and you couldn't believe people still thought that way. You always focused and it wasn’t your fault, and, yet, morons like these three persisted. After a few more minutes, you heard Alex again.

“Come on! You can’t possibly still be reading?”

“I’m sorry, just-” You sighed, running your hands through your hair. “Please, just a few more minutes?”

“God, you’re so fucking stupid. No wonder no one wants to work with you. All you do is hold people up, you’re a goddamn idiot” Alex said.

Your eyes burned and unshed tears started to push their way up but you fought them down. You wouldn’t let yourself cry in front of them. They didn’t deserve to see how they’d affected you. 

Finally, the bell went off and you were able to leave. Your group glared at you and you realized you  hadn’t discussed the themes. 

“It’s, um, the story’s about the juxtaposition of peace and violence. Even though the people are in a calm, controlled setting, they resort to violence every year. It’s an outdated tradition they keep up and, thus, it highlights the difference between their actions and how they want to be perceived.” You said quickly, voice wavering. 

Your group scoffed before walking off. That didn’t bother you too much. You knew your analysis was accurate and probably far better than anything they could have come up with, even if they’d spent the last 15 minutes of class discussing it. Despite this, you still felt deflated. The shit they’d said, the way they’d treated you? You couldn’t deny it, it got to you. 

You walked over to your locker and put your stuff away. After that, you decided you were just going to go home. You could call the school later and say you were feeling sick or something. Honestly, you couldn’t bring yourself to care. You were just so drained, you needed to get away from this place and the people in it.

However, you didn’t want Jess to worry. You sent him a quick text saying you weren’t feeling well and put on your headphones before walking out of the school.

What you didn’t expect was Jess to come flying out of nowhere, appearing by your side as if you’d summoned him.

“Jess! What are you doing? Don’t you have class!”

He shrugged. “You weren’t feeling well. Did you honestly expect I’d leave you by yourself? And, seriously, Y/N, you know I hate this place. You’re the only thing that makes it bearable so if you  wouldn’t be here, why should I?”

You nodded and kept walking forward. Jess looked at you quizzically, trying to decode your dejected state. He kept quiet, knowing not to push you to talk. He trusted you’d come to him when you were ready. Therefore, he simply followed you until you made it off campus, where you turned into a random alley and suddenly stopped walking.

Jess caught himself, almost running right into you. You suddenly turned around, dropped your bag, and bolted right into his chest. He was caught off guard but instinctively brought his arms around you, trying to comfort you. He noticed you were crying, your broken sobs getting muffled in his shirt. He soothingly rubbed his arms up and down your back, desperately trying to give you solace. After you finally quieted down, Jess gently and slowly pulled you back.

His hands gripped your shoulders as he studied your face, your sad gaze meeting his. “What happened?”

“Stupid English, that’s all”

“Come on, Y/N, don’t shut me out. What happened?” He said, his tone kind.

“I-” You trailed off, trying to keep your composure. “Some kids just said some shit. I was just reading slower than them and they said some shit. It’s not a big deal, I just- it got to me, okay?”

“Who?” Jess said, firmly this time.

“Jess-”

“Who, Y/N?”

“Alex, Justin, and Sarah.” 

Jess groaned, rubbing the heels of his hands over his eyes. “Fuck them, Y/N. They’re fucking ridiculous and they don’t know anything about you”

“I know, I know. That’s why I’m so goddamn frustrated! Because, like, it did get to me. Jess- Jess, they’re right. I felt like an idiot today, I felt stupid. And I hate feeling that way!” Hot tears smarmed in your eyes, the frustration and anger bringing them out. 

Jess’s gaze softened. As livid as he felt toward the three of them, he knew that’s not what you needed right now. 

“Hey, hey, hey. Love, take a breath. I’ve got you, okay?” 

You nodded, your breathing shaky from the stress of the day. 

“I’m sorry that happened today. Listen to me, Y/N. You’re so smart. You’re smarter than I am, hell, you’re smarter than anyone at that school! They’ve got nothing on you!”

You looked at him and smiled at his words but shook your head. “You don’t need to do that, Jess”

“Yes, I do. We promised we’d be honest in our relationship, right? Well, that’s all I’m doing. Seriously, Y/N, who else at that school could debate the themes in literature with me like you? Who could discuss the importance of accurate representation in books with me? Who could talk to me about just how influential YA books are and why they should be taken seriously-?”

“They are and they should!” You cut in.

Jess laughs, nodding in agreement. “Exactly!! You’re amazing, Y/N. And I swear those fuckheads are gonna get what’s coming to them”

“Jess-” You warn.

“Okay, okay!” He laughed, holding his hands up in mock surrender. “They just- they messed with you and made you upset and I fucking hate that”

“I hated it too. I hate doubting myself because of my dyslexia. I feel so shit about myself when I get in that headspace and I start spiraling and it gets out of control so fast.” 

“I know. It’s not your fault when those spirals happen. And I know you know this, but I’m just gonna remind you: you’re not any less because you’re dyslexic. It doesn’t make you stupid or anything. It’s a part of you and I love you, all of you”

Your heart swelled at his words. Everyone thought Jess wasn’t good expressing his emotions but you knew the truth. He was quite eloquent when he wanted to be, he just sometimes had trouble with vulnerability. You didn’t blame him for it, with his past it made perfect sense. But when you needed that reassurement, that compassion, you could always count on him for it. 

He moved to place a kiss on your forehead before slinging his arm around your shoulder. “Let’s go home, okay?”

“Okay” You smiled up at him and kissed him once more before tucking your head into his shoulder. He pulled you closer and you grabbed his free hand with yours as you continued to walk through the Stars Hollow streets together.

[pretend-writer]

How Am I Supposed To Live Without You (Diego Hargreeves x reader)

Summary: Suspecting that his best friend, Y/N, was hiding something from him, Diego finally finds out the truth.

Pairing: Diego Hargreeves x reader

Title Reference: How Am I Supposed To Live Without You x Michael Bolton

Word Count: 1.7k words

Warning: angst. pure angst. 

✤  ·  ✤  ·  ✤  ·  ✤  ·  ✤

Diego pov;

She was hiding something from me.

It was in an instant where I figured out Y/N had some sort of secret that she didn't tell me. It was the way she talked, her body language; whatever she was saying didn't match the vibe I was getting from her.

Either way, she thought she could keep something from me. She was wrong.

Y/N and I've been best friends since I left dad in that lonely ass mansion. She was the first friend I made that wasn't my siblings, not only that but she was my first love too.

I'd always tell myself that she was a friend, a best friend that I could never replace; which was the truth.

But the whole truth was that I loved her so much and I was scared to tell her how I felt about her. Afraid that my one true friend wouldn't love me back. Terrified that she'd think I was crazy and eventually leave me.

Now that I knew that she had a secret she wasn't telling me, I was dying to know what was so great that even I couldn't know about. Or perhaps she had other best friends that she was close with. Some sort of jealousy formed from this random assumption in my head and it was starting to get to me.

It had been about two weeks since I've figured everything all out. Y/N hasn't even mentioned anything out of the ordinary and she had been acting the same way as she did before.

At this point, I was too curious to wait until she told me first. This time, she had seemed so upset and I just wanted to make her feel better. 'What's on your mind?'

With a fake smile on her face, she replied. 'Ah, nothing Diego?'

'It doesn't seem like nothing.'

'I'll be alright, I promise.'

'Are you sure?'

'Mhmm.'

Maybe it was something I wasn't supposed to know, I've started to believe that. I hate that I was so curious to where it started to drive me crazy but the more time had passed, I started to doubt myself. It started to question my worth for her.

It could've been something serious that had happened, like something about her family or financial issues. But those were the things she would discuss with me whenever she needed someone to talk to.

At the same time, it couldn't be something that was completely sad and upsetting. After all, she was giggling and laughing last night when we were hanging out. Perhaps she was faking all of that. The fact that I didn't know what it was killed me but I decided to let it go.

That was until I saw Luther and Y/N hang out a lot.

I would admit, jealousy made me a nasty person. I'd get angry, upset at myself and take it out on the people I love. Despite the differences Luther and I had, he didn't deserve any hate from me. Y/N sure as hell didn't either.

It was stupid of me to assume; perhaps Luther and Y/N have started seeing each other?

But how was my assumption stupid? It could happen. Luther knew how I felt about Y/N but he can betray me or even love her himself. All these thoughts and the mystery drove me crazy.

This had led me and Y/N to fight and argue, she was confused to why I was upset all the time. I couldn't tell her it was because I was jealous, I knew it was dumb but I couldn't control myself.

Luther looked at us like we were crazy, he tried to be the mediator but I hated that. I hated that he was spending time with Y/N as much as I was or even more.

Eventually Y/N came up to me, 'Why are you acting this way? You know how much I hate it when you turn nasty like this. For no reason too, or at least you say there isn't one.'

I couldn't blame her for hating this side of me because I hated it too. Why was I so jealous and so angry but I wasn't man enough to tell her my feelings? Why was I so scared to tell her the whole truth?

'Did I do something to make you mad? You're usually not this bad but this is out of line, Diego.'

Y/N continued to ask questions I couldn't answer. The truth was she did do something to make me upset but it wasn't her fault at all. It wasn't her fault that her and Luther were getting closer. It wasn't her fault that these crazy assumptions in my head was making me jealous of them.

Of course she was making new friends, I was being a dick. I was hurting her in ways I didn't mean to but I didn't know any better because I was too busy with this jealousy that I couldn't handle.

'Diego, you need to relax okay?' Luther saw me angry one night, I think my mind was starting to stir up from all the anger that had built up inside me.

It had been nearly a month since Y/N and I stopped hanging out. She was avoiding me, annoyed about how I was acting. I don't blame her for one bit, I was a mess.

'How are you out of all people going to tell me to relax!?' I threw a knife onto the wall, barely missing Luther's shoulder.

What triggered me was when I saw Y/N's messages popping up on Luther's screen while he was on his phone. It suddenly got me heated when I started thinking about how she started to shift towards my brother and completely away from me, even thought the reasons were obvious it was because of how I was acting lately.

'Woah, what's wrong with you?' Luther's eyes widened, slowly backing up away from my room.

'You know Luther, you fucking know.' I bit my lip furiously, I didn't know how I wasn't bleeding at this point. I was so furious, my blood was practically boiling. 'I've loved her for so long and you took her away from me! What the hell did you do!?'

'Okay, dude. Please-'

'Don't fucking tell me what to do, Luther. So now what? You took my best friend and now you're dating her? Is that it huh?'

Luther took a deep breath, 'You need to calm down.'

'No, YOU need to understand that you're not better than me Luther. Stop using her to prove that!'

'You're confused, chill for a moment and we will talk once you're calm.'

'I don't need you to fucking tell me that you're fucking Y/N behind my back!'

Luther watched me, veins popping out of my head as I was heated in this conversation that wasn't going anywhere. 'Do you hear yourself Diego? Do you really think I'd do that to you?'

Chuckling under my breath, I shook my head. 'I don't trust you anymore "Number One." You know what you did.'

'I'm trying to protect you.'

'Don't you fucking lie to me!' I ran into Luther, punching his stomach but as strong as he was, he didn't flinch at all.

Luther sighed, taking all of my anger in and not fighting back. 'You have to believe me. I'd never do anything to hurt you.'

'You've been trying to compete with me for as long as I remember. Don't give me that bullshit.'

'I promise, Diego. I'm trying to protect you.'

'Just tell me the truth, you fuc-'

'She's gone.' Luther paused, scratching his head and not knowing what to do. 'She's gone, okay?'

Letting go of him, I slowly backed away. The words that just came out of his mouth didn't fully process in my mind. 'You're lying. Sh-she's not gone.'

'Remember Nate that she dated back in college? They've caught up months ago and she got engaged last month.' Luther mumbled, avoiding eye contact with me. 'She moved across the country with him, Diego.'

Instantly, I felt my life crumbling into millions of pieces as Y/N slowly slipped away from me. Y/N left for good, with a different man. She didn't even tell me she was leaving.

I never gave her a chance to tell me.

Instead she had to hear me bicker, bitch about literally something so stupid. If she had told me all of this, I could've stopped her from going. I could of finally told her how much I loved her and how I couldn't live without her.

'Diego...' Luther knew how much I loved Y/N, he knew how much it pained me to hear this news. 'I'm so sorry Diego.'

'No...' I didn't know what else to say, I was broken and I didn't even have the chance to see her.

'I've tried so hard to stop her, tried to convince her to tell you that she was leaving. Y/N couldn't do it and then you two started fighting. She suspected you knew about it and thought that you didn't want to speak to her anymore.'

All I could think of was how much she probably suffered from my attitude towards her. We had never fought before, yes a small argument and jokes here and there. But never to a point where we stopped talking all together.

Not to a point where we leave each other for good.

I made everything worse, I was supposed to be her best friend that would be there for her for anything. Instead I hurt her, I made her feel like she couldn't come to me for help or trust me with anything.

'I'm so sorry.' Luther apologized over and over again.

'You've done more than enough to help. This is all my fault. I drove her away.'

Luther reached out for me, hugging and comforting me. Tears rolled down my eyes, I didn't care that I hated crying especially in front of my siblings. Y/N was gone and everything was my fault.

I continued to cry, pounding on Luther's chest as I bawled in pain. I've never felt anger and sadness like this before, it hurt so bad and all I wanted to do was talk to Y/N or see her again.

But I couldn't. She left for good, turned her life around and kept on going. She kept on going without me in the picture. I can't even imagine my life without Y/N because she was my life. She was the person that kept me going. But now it was all over.

Because all that I've been living for was gone.

[dooandpoo]

Boo’s clown thoughts about Dan

I just re-watched the Heartthrob video from 2018. I have listened to Dan and Phil playing Heartthrob in 2021. I have watched compilations of Dan and Phil’s liveshows and ✨ gay moments ✨ throughout the years. I am officially qualified to make reaching assumptions about Dan’s psyche, and his taste in men 💅. (I am a clown.)

Dan hides many of his feelings under sarcasm. This essay is predicated on a combination of assuming many of his jokes are actually his real feelings, and also taking into account things he has said with sincerity.

First, he wants to fix people. His whole perspective of Bobby changes when the card “never been kissed” is added — Dan gets all soft and literally says “that’s a game changer”. Phil thinks the same, suggests that everything else of Bobby is bravado, to which Dan heartily agrees. Dan loves himself some 💪 meaty men 💪, but gravitates more to the men that seem soft or personable. “Never been kissed” is a big deal for a cool sexy rich guy in high school, and Dan just knows that he could take care of him. It brings Bobby back down to earth, makes him feel real, makes him someone that Dan could relate to. Dan is obsessed with cleaning, takes forever to plan things, gets worked up when things aren’t perfect, must be in control. But he’s drawn to the imperfect, knows that he can do something with it. Someone that’s already perfect isn’t interesting to Dan. But Bobby, who’s rich and sexy but never been kissed? That’s interesting to Dan, that’s someone he can work with.

Dan is a gold-digger 💷💰 (let me explain). Even before the kissing detail is learned about Bobby, Dan chose him to go to the party with just because he’s rich, because his house would be cool, and Dan could pretend to like him for a night of luxury. Dan is a minimalist, he enjoys things to be simple in his life (as stated in the pizza mukbang video), but he loves opulence .... but not for himself. This is fascinating — Dan doesn’t parade his current wealth around, actively works against it. But. He wants to go to a party at a fancy house with a pool, hang off the arm of some cool guy. He wants to have a “team of stylists” for red carpet events to choose his outfits and dress him up all pretty for the world to see. He loves his fancy trips to beautiful places. He gives his Sims elegant and gaudy accessories and furnishings, splurging in a way he never would in real life. This boy loves him some extravagance and attention, wants to parade around looking like a snack, even though most of the time he prefers being low-key.

Dan loves cultivating a specific image for himself. He spent much of his teenage and young adult life trying to fit in, making sure his hair is perfect, making sure his photos are from the perfect MySpace angle, not being “gay”. His Instagram is a wall of black, broken up by only a few things. This is partially because he doesn’t like choice, can’t commit to things when it’s his decision. He can’t choose something “wrong”. See the mukbang video where Phil suggests just picking different clothes from along the line in his closet, and Dan says “that’s how you get ensembles that look like this” indicating Phil’s absurd get-up. Dan can’t imagine just throwing things on willy-nilly, he must present a completely unified vision of himself to the world. In the Attitude shoot, he was devastated that he couldn’t wear the cool boots, that his hair was too long. He secretly wished that it was a nude or horny photoshoot, joking about this during their first Stereo, because he wants to be noticed in that way. He wants to be seen as sexy and cool, he loves it. He wants positive attention. His mid-2020 thirst post on Instagram is a perfect example of this, playing it off as silly when he clearly was really into it. He does this with most of his photos, needing to look a certain way so that the world sees him as cool and sexy even when he’s masking it behind sarcasm. He knows he’s cute, and flaunts it, even though “flaunting it” means he has to be in control of everything all the time.

Let’s go back to the 2018 Heartthrob. One of the boys’ personality traits is revealed to be “can’t wait to have kids”, and Dan is not having it. 🙅‍♂️ Now, Dan would describe that as his fear of commitment. But let’s look closer. Earlier that year, Dan and Phil met Louise’s newborn baby. Both boys go completely gooey the entire time, entranced by her. Dan gets this look in his eye when he hands Pearl to Phil. He watches Phil closely to make sure he’s holding her correctly, hovers and touches her, needing to protect and feel the inherent trust of a baby. He and Phil keep smiling, and then Dan — out of the blue — gets a far away look and comments that there will be phanfiction of him and Phil adopting a baby. Dan was thinking about having a baby with Phil. But he’s scared, because even though Dan would take care of his baby so well, he’d probably worry his ass off making sure the baby has everything. It’s not just the fear of commitment, it’s that he can’t trust himself to do it “correctly”. Even though he’s been with Phil for years, I think Dan second-guesses himself constantly. A baby, or even a dog, for that matter, would send his anxiety into overdrive, because he can’t be in complete control (even though he’d be the best dad and partner ever).

Time to think about thot Dan. In the end, Dan is horny. He visibly reacts to each of the Heartthrob boys that have their “guns out”, and doesn’t easily deny that he’s interested in Bobby for his arms. And Phil knows that. When Dan asks Phil why he thinks Dan chose Bobby ... Phil stalls. Phil does his best to justify his guess that Dan likes Bobby because of his random personality traits, because Dan would like being driven around in a nice car and to ask Bobby about his dream of being a secret agent, but Phil clearly thought Dan would choose Bobby because he knows Dan loves the meaty lads. Phil knows Dan well enough to know that this boy loves him some skin and some muscle showing. (Hmm, interesting that Dan likes his boys meaty 👀, and frequently refers to Phil as such, even at the beginning of this very Heartthrob video …. hmmmm ... says he’d like to receive a lapdance 💋 from Phil “for the spectacle” .... hmmmmmmmmm.)

Back to “commitment” 💍 issues. During a liveshow from the early danisnotonfire days, Dan is asked for relationship advice. Here, he is surprisingly honest and serious. He says to not stay in a relationship where you’re not happy. It seems simple, but Dan really digs deep here. Dan says that if you’re not going to marry a person, don’t stay with them for even a day longer. Dan said that. Dan is scared of trusting others, he is constantly sarcastic and talks about himself disparagingly, but he is self-aware enough to know that he wants commitment. He wants someone to love him forever, to be by his side. That’s why he says there’s no point in remaining in a relationship if you and the other person can’t see yourself together in 50 years. And Dan had been with Phil (in whatever way that means for them) for a few years at that point, completely comfortable with each other. They were already making huge decisions together, like living together and moving to London and starting a radio show and considering moving to New York together. Dan had committed to Phil at this point, knew that he could see himself still with Phil in 50 years. And Phil had committed to Dan, regardless of if Dan felt sure of that or not.

Even earlier than that, Dan had told a fan on formspring that he loves sleeping in the same bed as other people, not even in a sexual way. He loves human contact, sharing space 😌. We know this because he’s so open to hugs with his fans, wants people around to make him feel safe (by people I mean Phil), and is so exasperated by quarantine because he needs more touch and contact. (Tangent — Phil also loves physical touch, as stated in an old liveshow when he said he prefers cuddles to kisses, and is very handsy 👐 with Dan.)

This doesn’t end in physical touch though. He needs other people around. He wants a companion through life. He misses Phil when he’s gone because he’s scared of the house being empty, because Phil makes him feel safe. He wants another person in his bed because it feels nice to be with someone, knowing they’re there. He wants to have someone to work with, to connect with, to make music with, to share moments with. And now this boy has all of that. He has for the last ten-odd years. But this is scary. Dan isolated himself growing up, built barriers between himself and everybody else. He needs to be control of the situation at all times, embarrassed when he’s not. Dan uses self-deprecating language constantly, complains about his inability to connect with people. But he has Phil. Every day they’re together, I think Dan accepts just a little more that he can deserve happiness, that he won’t lose Phil, that Phil is not temporary. Phil shows him that he is worthy of affection, physical and otherwise, that Dan is allowed to reach out and it’s safe to do so. Dan doesn’t have to be alone anymore, he can reach out and Phil is there.

These nonsense ramblings are just to say that Dan has the perfect life partner in Phil. Phil balances him out, lets Dan be himself loudly and quietly, jokes when Dan is too serious. Phil will never leave him, proving that every day, making plans with Dan in mind. Phil is confident and self-assured where Dan is not. They ease each other’s anxieties, approach their fame in similar ways. They genuinely enjoy being together, not just in their personal life, but professionally as well. They are a perfect match, soulmates. 💕