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#im working through some stuff here no worries it's fine
satturn · 1 year
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feeling very unwell forever
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vanyafresita · 8 months
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actually, you know what ? im glad my ex gf ghosted me, i dodged a bullet it seems
#this was two years ago and just a few months ago i started getting over it#on the one hand yeah it fucking SUCKS i wish i had had some type of warning instead of radio silence suddently from one day to the other#on the other i was ready to move to texas (me: poc queer fem presenting nd bitch) and was looking seriously jobs over there#and like- i fucking HATE the usa but she was really scared about leaving the states to come to europe- so i was willingly to travel there to#be with her and not put her through that (ive been traveling since childhood so im used to it- but she has certain mental stuff going on and#taking her away from her family and her childhood city was going to be really tough- of course i'd sacrifice my life for hers)#and like im so sorry to everybody who is stuck in the usa right now bcs ur country is treating yall so poorly i feel genuinely bad#but as someone who was planninh to work over there as a teacher..... IM SO FUCKING GLAD I DONT HAVE TO SET FOOT THERE 😭#every single thing i hear about the education system there seems hellish- as well as the teachers' conditions and wages#like over here its not all rainbows and flowers but at least i dont have to worry about school shootings or getting fired for recommending#books from a banned list 💀#ESPECIALLY as a poc latino queer linguistics and literature teacher- i'd love to talk to students about a big range of things- i cannot#imagine having to censor myself or dance around a subject becs “kids are too dumb to understand queerness” “youre trying to groom them”#“dont brainwash em you commie” like ma'am im trying to help your child develop basic empathy and respect for those who dont look like them#like i hear some serious worrying stuff from teachers over there i hope u guys are holding up somehow 😭😭😭#anyways idk how the phrase in english goes but in spanish we say cuando dios cierra una puerta- abre una ventana#(<- trying to look for the positive in getting ghosted by the girl of their dreams)#its fine guys anyways#yeah that was the first LD relationship ive ever had- never trying that again#also i found out im arospec so im definitely not getting into a romantic relationship lmfaoooooo#only QPRs for me now if anything lol#vanya strawberry flavored
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heyitslapis · 11 days
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btw they confirmed that line they sent was intentionally flirty and said something like "this is just me flirting on easy mode. I can't wait to see how you react when I really turn on the charm 😉"
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itz-mfkn-de · 26 days
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\\ALWAYS YOU//. M.R
warnings— OOC MATTHEO, Im a sucker for toxic boys but I made him extra sweet in his one idk why, uhhh not many tbh, cussing, kissing, smoking, that’s all I think.
summary— Mattheo was your best friend, always had been, but was the title of ‘friend’ enough?
-my first work for Mattheo! I will eventually get a master list going once I get more comfertable posting on here. This is a repost of one of my works on wattpad, just with some tweaks bc that work was olldddd-
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You sat against mattheos 𝐛𝐞𝐝, 𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 out of his dorm window.
"You know, some times, I'm worried for you. You just stare at things, it's weird." He snickered  as he took a drag from his cigarette.
You looked at him and scoffed, "Sometimes I'm worried about your lungs, you're bound to get some type of problem with all that's smoking you do." You half-joked, glancing at him.
He rolled his eyes, tilting his head up and blew the smoke out of his mouth.
"Seriously Mattheo, that stuff is absolute horse-shit for your body." You stated, accompanying your words with a sharp glare.
"I don't do it that often, just when I'm stressed." He muttered, taking his feet off of his desk and turning his body to face you.
"What happened to the whole 'I don't give a fuck about anything or anybody but myself' thing?" You said, mocking him to the best of your abilities.
"First of all I don't fucking sound like that," he laughed and squinted at you "second, just stressed about life, nothing in particular." 
You softly chuckled at his reaction. His eyes broke from yours, looking at some papers on his desk. Your eyes, however, never left his frame. You could stare at him for eternity, everything about his face seemed so perfect, almost as if it were meant to be admired.
You soon realized your staring and quickly averted your gaze towards the window again.
"You gonna go to the Yule ball this year?" You broke the silence, you knew Mattheo hated those things, he hated having to be around a shit ton of people and act like he enjoyed their company.
"Probably not." His demeanor changed, his tone became short, almost snappy.
"Oh, I'm probably just gonna go with Becca." You mumbled, knowing that if no guy was to ask you, Becca had your back.
"Hm." He nearly laughed at your remark.
"What? What's so funny?" You asked, looking back at him, his back still facing you.
"Just surprised you aren't going with a random slytherin guy or something." He answered, but the way he had said it has a strange undertone that you weren't sure how to feel about.
"Well I mean I don't know, I haven't been asked yet." You stated truthfully.
"Ah, I see." He murmured, soon after taking another drag of his cigarette.
You felt tension building in the room, suffocating tension. You weighed your options out, but you decided it would be better to give Mattheo some space, for what you were unsure of.
"Well, Becca and Emma told me they wanted to go dress shopping earlier so I think I'm gonna head over there so we can solidify our plans." You announced while picking up your books and putting them in your bag. 
"Bye Mattheo." You said while walking out of his dorm, expecting a response.
You shut the door when you got nothing, you mind raced with the possibilities on what could've caused mattheos strange behavior.
Maybe he'd just had an off day? No that couldnt have been it, he was fine moments before his attitude took a turn. 
Perhaps he was just having mood swings, you wouldn't be surprised with all the trash he puts in his body.
You stuck with that story and walked back to your dorm, which was on the other side of the slytherin tower. 
You reached it, setting your things down, then quickly turned around and nearly raced to your friends dorm.
The second you reached it, You waisted no time to jump on her bed, causing her to jump. 
"Yes, of course you can come into my room unannounced and lay on my bed." Becca said sarcastically. She had been digging through her closet in an attempt to find a dress. 
"Sorry, I just need to vent." You said while propping yourself up on your elbows.
"Go ahead." She sighed and laid her body weight 
"Okay so, there's this guy. He's like my best friend, but.."
She raised her eyes brows, signaling you to continue.
"But I want us to be more, or atleast I see him as more than a friend. I just feel like no matter how hard I try I can't get him to open up, he just.. won't."  You groaned.
"And everytime I get this sliver of hope that I've made progress, he just completely shuts down, leaving me in the dark confused and a little bit heartbroken!" You borderline screamed, your face shoved into her mattress.
"Okay, uh, let's calm down. If he's not showing any signs of being interested maybe you should just, move on- well attempt to at least." Becca stated ,rubbing your back.
You shut your eyes, truly taking in your friends words.  “hey Yknow what will make you feel better?” She nearly jumped with excitement. “Going to look for a dress in town.”
You knew she only had good intentions but the words kept echoing through your head. The thought of keeping Mattheo as a friend hurt, but it seemed to be all you could do at this point without ruining your friendship.
Maybe she was right.
Maybe you needed to accept Mattheo 
was just a friend.
-
All you could think about was the Yule ball. Over the next few weeks the days flew by, the anticipation growing larger with each one passing.
Of course you had been asked by some sweet guy from the Ravenclaw house, and, taking Becca's advice, you said yes.
There was nothing wrong with him, he just..he wasn't him.
You had decided to get ready alone, slipping into a beautiful green dress you and Becca had picked out. You finished your hair and makeup, looking into your vanity mirror.
You felt beautiful.
You smiled softly at how well you had dolled yourself up.
Glancing up at the clock, you rushed out of your dorm room, realizing it was the time you and your date had agreed to meet at the entrance by. 
You walked gracefully through the halls, a large smile adorning your face. Your heels tapped softly against the ground. You neared the entrance, your breath becoming shallow from the nerves. 
Then you saw Becca, she was wearing a beautiful Maroon dress. She looked absolutely breath taking.
"Hey!— oh my gosh." Becca looked at you, her jaw dropping. 
"You look stunning! Like some type of goddess...." She said barely above a whisper.
"Becca! Stop, you can't be talking, I forgot how to breathe the moment I saw you." You hugged her.
You were about to continue praising her and her beauty, but before you could comment you heard someone call your name.
"Y/n..wow.." he said, just loud enough for you to hear.
You turned around to see your date, who was wearing a very clean red and black suit. 
"Oh my gosh hi! Sorry for being a tad late, I lost track of time while getting ready!" You made your way next to your date, not before Becca gave you a sly smile and a push, leaving to go with her specimen she had chose for the night 
"It's okay.., you look amazing." He had said, taking your arm into his. He began to lead you into the ballroom.
"Thank you, I must say, you cleaned up nice." You smiled sweetly at him.
You and him entered the large room full of people, everything was elegant and royal, not a single speck of dust on anything.
You looked around the large room as your date led you down the stairs, you couldn't lie, you felt like a princess. The beautiful architecture of the room, complimented by your stunning dress, felt like something straight out of a fairy tale.
Once you had made it to the bottom of the staircase, you excused yourself away from your date in an attempt to go find Becca again. 
You stumbled past groups of people, many of them were couples having a romantic moment. 
You tried your best not to run into anybody, you dodged dancing bodies and nearly jogged across the dance floor.
You almost missed him.
You almost walked right by him.
You almost could've saved yourself the heartbreak.
But no you saw it—him with some random Hufflepuff girl. 
The way he whispered in her ear, the way she giggled a little too sweetly, everything. 
It all made you wanna cry—or throw up, which one that would be you weren't quite sure about yet. 
"Y/n?" Theodore came beside you and patted your back.
"Theo-Theodore, I thought Mattheo wasn't coming to the dance?" You struggled to get your words out as your eyes darted between the scene before you and Theodore. 
"Oh—uh yeah, he wasn't gonna originally, but some girl asked him and I guess he took a liking to her because usually he just brushes everyone off." Theo answered.
"Oh, I see, I just came to say hello. I'll be on my way now." Before Theodore could argue with your strange behavior you turned your back and walked as quickly as you could back to were your date was. 
You abandoned the idea of going to find Becca, you couldn't accidentally run into Mattheo and his.. friend again.
Instead you decided that distracting yourself with your date would be the best thing for your heart at the moment.
"Hey, sorry , I just saw a friend and got distracted." You said, out of breath.
"Oh. Don't even sweat it, I'm just glad you didn't run away and not come back." He joked, dragging you towards the dance floor. You couldn't help but laugh at his bubbly personality. It was a nice change of speed.
"I hope you like to dance." His hands fell onto your hips, yours made their way to his shoulders.
"I actually hate it." You smiled at him. 
"How unfortunate." Your smile grew when he matched your energy. You nearly forgot what you had seen a couple moments ago.
But alas, you didn't.
You could feel your chest tightening up, the tears bordering you waterline. Just thinking about him touching that girl in any way made you want to breakdown.
"Ex.—excuse me." You tried to excuse yourself as politely as you could. 
You didn't want your date too see you like this, vulnerable, heartbroken.
You urgently walked towards any door in your line of sight. When you finally found one, you ran through it. 
You just couldn't escape him, no matter how hard you tried. He was at every single corner you turned.
You nearly groaned when you saw him propped up over the balcony, smoking of course. 
He hasn't seemed to notice you, still looking out at the stars. 
You couldn't do it anymore, you couldn't spend one more fucking second acting like you weren't in love with him. 
The sad part was you'd rather be his friend than him hate you and be nothing at all. As long as he thought about you, you'd be okay. 
That's what you had been telling yourself, but you couldn't hold onto that lie anymore. 
"Mattheo." You croaked out behind him.
His head shot to the side, looking you dead in the eyes. 
"Angel… what're you doing out here."  He looked back out to the stars, unable to make eye contact. 
"I can't do it anymore."  You said shakily.
He turned his full body around this time, his eyes a dark brown. He blew the smoke out of his mouth, the wind pushing it in the opposite direction.
"I can't keep pretending I don't feel this way.., do you know how hard it was to watch you talk to that girl?" You nearly cried out.
"All the girls you fuck with and then bring them to shit like this, I cant keep lying to myself —wishing that it was me instead of her."
You were on the brink of gasping for air, your head pounded. You couldn't believe you had suppressed these emotions for so long. Every single time you went to Mattheo's dorm, you could barely restrain yourself from kissing him. 
Before you could continue on with your speech 
Mattheo had forced you against the wall. 
His lips met yours in a harsh collision. In an almost immediate reaction, your body responded to his actions, kissing him back with just as much need and hurry.
"You don't get to fucking do that."  He pulled back from your lips, still making sure to keep his face mere inches from yours.
"Every single day, I'd sit there and watch you talk to this new guy, I couldn't do shit about it— I wouldn't let myself do shit about it."
“I knew you deserved so much better than some lousy asshole like me, angel.” His hand held a firm grip on your hips, his other still had its place on the stone wall. 
"It took everything in me not to punch that fucker in the face when I saw him look at you, but I knew you wouldn't want that." You melted beneath his gaze.
His kisses trailed down your jawline.
"During second year, when I went to the dance, I saw you there with Draco, I nearly killed him right after. I couldn't bear to see you with anyone other than myself.. so I wouldn't go, I knew I wouldn't be able to handle it so I never went to another ball again." He gently caressed your cheek with his thumb.
"Until this year." He mumbled softly in between the kisses he was leaving on your neck.
He brought his face back up to yours, his eyes stormy and clouded with something darker than just simple need.
"What'd he say to you? What did he call you?" Mattheo asked with a dark shimmer in his eyes, one you were hoping was just from the moon.
You swallowed harshly, you hadn't realized how dry your mouth truly was. 
"He just said I looked nice—" 
"Nice? You look fucking ravishing. I've never met a girl as beautiful as you, never once in my life seen a girl who could compare anywhere near you...That's why I call you angel you know...,because even if an angel walked by, my eyes would still be glued on you."
His gentle voice tickled your ears, and your cheeks warmed up beneath him.
"You are my angel."
He kissed you again, only this time it was more gentle. His lips held no rush, they were soft and comforting. 
You were the one to pull back this time, smiling sweetly up at him. He pulled you from against the wall, leaving the two of you in the center of the balcony, under the sparkling stars.
"I can't believe we've been friends all these years, and neither of us made a move."
He spun you around under the moon light, the beautiful sky knocking the breath out of you.
"Hey matty..?”You whispered once he had began to hold you in his arms gently.
"Yes angel?" He matched your tone, the sweet nickname you gave him made his chest tighten up.
"I love you." You closed your eyes, shutting them slowly.
"I love you... I always thought I'd never be the type to say that so freely, guess I just needed to meet the right person." He swayed the two of you lightly, finding a rhythm in the midnight winds. 
"Of course it's you... 
It's always been you."
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luvvixu · 4 months
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the end
synopsis: the end of your relationship was inevitable. that's why both of you and gojo satoru individually prepare yourselves against the pain and separation of an upcoming divorce. and when that thing came, you suddenly found yourselves trapped inside the circle of your marriage where denial is present, and acceptance is absent. let us all see how the marriage walk through the end.
tags: divorce!au, ex-husband!gojo, angst, hurt/no comfort, mentioned of death, mentioned of trauma, read at your own risk
a/n: here's an almost 8k words of oneshot about gojo marriage again. i've mentioned this before but im taking a very small break and will be back on june 5 with an update regarding to the chapter of mind over matter ff. be sure to check out the announcement!
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it was a peaceful morning on your balcony with satoru gojo, your husband for almost two years. you are reading your newly purchased book with your glasses on to help you see the letters.
you take a second peek at your husband who was already gazing at you from the beginning. his gaze was painted with a mixture of sadness and adoration towards you. looks like he had something to say, and you're right, he did have something to say when he mumbles your name.
oh god, you knew where this conversation would be. keeping your eyes bore on him, you fully turned your attention to him and waited for him to speak what's on his heart and mind.
"i think we should file a divorce."
his voice was monotonous and yet you knew it really wasn't, his face also did the same since you also didn't hold one either. your expression still remained calm like he was not asking for a divorce as you closed your book and then put it back on the coffee table.
meanwhile, satoru couldn't read you at this moment because you were quiet, too quiet for his liking. were you so shocked that you couldn't react to his sudden cut of ties? or was it just you already expected this the moment when you woke up?
probably, the most accurate reason and answer was the second one. satoru watches you lean on the seat with your hands clasp on your lap. he also never fails to see the neutral glaze in your eyes.
"if you are wondering why i didn't hold any emotion as you speak, that's because i already reacted a year ago." a sigh escalated from your lips as you removed your glasses also and put it on the table.
"you expected that this day would come?" he said in silence while secretly fiddling with the calluses on his hand—a hidden and canonical habit of satoru whenever he feels anxious and worried.
before this day would come, the two of you got married when both of you were twenty. a young, dumb, and somehow not stupid but definitely reckless who took a big tramp of change among themselves.
satoru was the one who asked you to get married after almost four years of being inside an on and off relationship. that was very fast and very reckless at that time—but of course you agreed because you are a fool to get yourself blinded by your love towards him.
so, the two of you got married and with only some people whom you both held close dearly attended the said wedding. it was simple and civil, but to you, it was your everything. the wedding and this marriage mean so much to you.
your marriage went pretty well in your first few months of being married. both of you got yourself a house with a nice garden that you absolutely adore, you also got yourselves a work almost instantly too. satoru got more missions since he was now a graduate, while you work in your own cafe and occasionally take jujutsu stuff.
things were really fine with heaven as the witness. until one night during your almost first anniversary, you caught him going home around three to four o'clock in the morning with a smell of alcohol and woman's perfume that's definitely not yours. he's really drunk, which was weird because he hates alcohol. you wondered what's the occasion or any celebration that should be celebrated and whatnots, but you can't think of any. so that leads you to silently crying.
you did not confront him about your first suspicion of cheating, you want him to admit it himself, but that doesn't mean you're going to tolerate that piece of shit because for god's sake! there's a fucking hickey on his neck that night, you knew it wasn't yours since you've barely had an intercourse due to both of your busy schedules.
you remember asking him about his whereabouts that night like you weren't aware, but his answer just disappoints you, he told you that he had an emergency mission and needed him in action asap at kyoto around 11pm and it took him some time to finish it. as mentioned before, his answer disappoints you, because your assumption has been partially proven.
satoru was clearly lying about his whereabouts that night but still the cheating allegations were not clear. maybe the seemingly foreign hickeys on his neck was already evidence but you're probably still in denial, so you didn't instantly conclude that he was really cheating with you.
but you still couldn't shake off his illicit affairs. why? because satoru was lying about the emergency mission on kyoto. he wasn't there, you knew that because you were the one who took the mission, not him. satoru actually rejected the mission because he's busy with other matters so you took it yourself without even telling him.
all of these things that are happening leads you back to that day when he proposed to you. it was so sudden that it made you a little bit skeptical. but when you asked him why he suddenly asked you to get married? easy, you didn't know.
however, you had your hypothesis that after geto disappeared and went on his rebellious phase, you let gojo use you to relieve his grief. that is why when you realize that this marriage is meant to not last long, you secretly cry to yourself during your first year anniversary as a married couple.
meanwhile, satoru knew to himself that he couldn't stand a long-term relationship. though he also started to feel bad for making things go very quickly with you, his love towards you is pure and genuine. in fact, he would do anything just to keep you safe and happy. but he wasn't able to do that when you're the opposite of him.
he is selfish and you are selfless.
no matter how hard he tried to change or even make things up for you, he just couldn't do it. there's this invisible dark string that pulls him inside the void of darkness. and he couldn't afford to bring you down with him. the thing that geto did really left a scar, a permanent scar to his chest that creates an inescapable hole that keeps on growing bigger and sucking his life in the process.
while you, you fully commit yourself to him. that's why everything would be pointless for satoru to let himself get hurt just to protect you. because you would literally throw yourself in the fire when he's burning.
it was like the two of you are a magnet with the same pole. you can't attract each other no matter how hard you try to let them collide.
back to reality, your head was faced downward. your husband sought for your eyes by calling your name meticulously, but you refused. an internal laugh at your pathetic figure rang through your mind, you are laughing at yourself for believing that you are already prepared for this moment, turns out, you're not—you’ll never be.
satoru mumbles your name again. and all of the sudden, you just let out a nod, followed by a small sigh. you let yourself look at him again despite the unnoticed tears in your eyes.
"okay, but let's spend this whole day as husband and wife for the last time. let's do the things we usually do during our free time." you said, and satoru agrees with you almost instantly. he thinks this is the least thing he could do for you before setting each other free.
everything went normal for the rest of the day. satoru takes you out for lunch, visits your favorite cafe for desserts, and even goes to the park where he asked you out to be his wife.
and right now, the two of you are in the cemetery, specifically in haibara's graveyard. the sun was proceeding to its dusk, making the place a bit solemn because of its ambience.
"do you think he'll be mad at my decision?" your soon-to-be ex-husband asked you with his small tired voice. haibara was your bestest friend of all and he actually talked to gojo when he's still alive about his relationship with you. he would like gojo to take care of you and treat you more than you deserve in your entire life.
"i don't think so. haibara only wants the best for us. he's a man of freedom, after all. and yet, how ironic because he, himself, has no freedom during his time in the jujutsu." you answered him as you watched the candle burn itself.
satoru looked at you. "how about you, y/n? are you mad at my decision?" he asked you a bit hesitant.
you just smiled at him and said, "i will answer that later, satoru." satoru nodded at your answer, he understood that you had a lot to say to him later.
after some time, you two decided to go home to your shared apartment. the journey back was fun and relaxing, it was filled with smiles and laughter that will soon vanish as the dawn is coming.
6:00 PM
both of you arrived at home. you helped satoru hang his coat on the raker like you usually do whenever he comes home during winter. this small act is something that would be definitely missed by him dearly, since you will not be around to do it.
"thanks for agreeing to go out with me." you said to him with a smile that almost reached your eyes. the only thing that stops you from giving your bestest smile was the divorce, but you subside because this is your last day as a married couple. you have to enjoy it to the extent.
"that was the least thing i could do for you before…nevermind." he said. satoru was not cheerful enough to make you smile whenever your eyes met. you also noticed that he was downhearted since you visited haibara's graveyard.
though as you were heading in your shared apartment, he was smiling and laughing. guess you didn't overlook him at all and you failed to notice his hidden pain.
you watched him lay down on the couch. "you looked bothered. was it because i didn't answer your question earlier?" you said quietly.
satoru didn't say anything, and according to his vocabulary, silence means yes. you sigh to yourself and take a seat on the same couch where your husband was lying in.
your hand reached out for his face, cupping it as satoru looked at you with his hooded eyelids. those magical six blue eyes are staring at you with known emotion, pain and agony.
"you didn't ask me why i suddenly wanted to get divorce…" he mumbles, nestling his head in your palm.
"you agreed without questioning me. i don't even see you cry about this. why y/n? are you hurting yourself by keeping your emotions inside you?" he continued. the pain in his voice breaks your heart into bits of pieces. satoru looked so vulnerable, his true emotions are showing exclusively for you.
you let out a small but bitter chuckle. "crying is not part of the things we usually do during our free time together, toru." his eyes widened at your answer. a droplet of tears slide down on your palm. satoru was crying, and you let him weep because you knew he's pent up.
"and i'm not mad at you. i also didn't ask you any questions because i know you know what you are doing and i respect your decision." you added.
"although, i admit. i want to bawl my eyes out. i want to scream because my heart is aching for believing that i was prepared for this moment." your breathings started to become shaky also just by watching satoru weep under your touch.
you refused to cry. at least not now.
"but i don't want to ruin this day by crying. i want both of us to savor this moment with smiles and laughter. so that when we part our ways, we wouldn't have any regrets to hold."
"so, satoru…let's continue to spend the rest of our night happily, hmm?" you let yourself smile for him to be motivated to stop from crying. however, he did the opposite. satoru cried even harder.
your hand is being cradled by him. you could feel his tears on your palm followed by his little hiccups. this scene alone in front of was usually enough to make you cry even harder than him. it was utterly heartbroken to see your man cry like this.
"hush, my…" love, that's the word you would like to say but forbids you to do so. satoru also noticed it too and he absolutely hates the feeling of it.
"l-love. call me love. c-call me like you used to call me before. first name basis is not part of the things we usually do during our free time together." he mimicked your words earlier. though it may sound like a joke, it isn't. satoru has been dead serious since the beginning of the day.
"my love…"
"y-yes, my sweetheart?" he responded.
your lips quiver from the overflowing emotions in your chest, but you still refuse to let yourself cry even when you're all by yourself. god, you are hopeless and devastated.
but dear me, it felt so good to hear him call you with endearing words. oh how you wish this kind of moment would last forever. maybe in another life, it would be. only if fate would be kind enough to give satoru to you again, maybe it will and it would be.
8:00 PM
satoru was all alone. his eyes were puffy from crying and stuff. he was such a mess. and if anyone would see, they would probably think that he's a zombie because of how low energy he was.
it took him almost an hour to stop crying. and you declared that this is the first and would be the last time that you would see him cry very hard.
right now, he was currently packing his things as he was about to move out tonight while playing betty by taylor swift. somehow, his mood got even more affected by this song, for every lyric hits him hard and he doesn't know why.
"♪ you heard the rumors from inez, you can't believe a word she says ♪" the radio sang. a shaky sigh came out from his mouth, he felt like crying again.
“♪ most times, but this time, it was true ♪”
"let me help you pack your things." you suddenly barge inside your onced shared bedroom after cleaning up for tonight. you are also in your sleep wear when satoru looks at you.
“♪ the worst thing that i ever did, was what i did to you ♪”
you didn't fail to notice that he is listening to one of your favorite artist's songs. a flashback hits you, it was the moment where you persuade him to listen to it with you. now, he has grown invested in their songs.
he mumbles a small okay as he watches you sit down beside him and redo the messy clothes he just stuffed inside his luggage. most of his clothes were luxurious like polo shirts, slacks pants, coats, and his favorite, blindfolds.
your eyes soften when you come across a small pouch that contains hair ties and bobby pins you onced bought for him as a prank. you still remembered the moment he let you tie his messy white locks with colorful pins and he looked so incredibly pretty with it. you couldn't help but to feel yourself getting emotional again.
don't cry. don't cry. don't cry.
meanwhile, satoru remained very quiet, for he was staring at the photo in his hand. it was your wedding photo where the both of you are wearing traditional japanese attire. he couldn't help but stare at your smiling face for too long. you looked so beautiful.
the wedding was very simple, but satoru describes it as one of his happiest days, and he is not lying to himself whenever he would say that. because he onced dreamed of getting married to you, and it came true. he also had the same state as you, both on the verge of crying.
"i wonder…would you get remarried someday?" he asked out of the sudden. you shifted your gaze to him and found him staring at your wedding photo. instantly, your eyes went soft.
"i am not sure." you replied silently as you closed his luggage and proceeded to the other one.
your hands momentarily stop working as you stare at them and watch it shake. "but if i do, it would probably take me a decade or so to find another husband to love." you said. but truth to be told, you had no motivation left to find another husband.
"you're twenty-two right now. so like…you'll be thirty plus by then when that happens," he calculated. "how about you? would you consider getting remarried also?" you asked him the same question.
he thinks for a moment before nodding slightly. "probably yes." your heart let out a wince but you tried your best to hide it. those words unintentionally hurt you and cut you deeper than a knife.
"w-well, i just wished good luck for both of us in the future." the crack in your voice didn't go unnoticed by satoru. he was about to reach you but then eventually dropped it. "me too…" was all he could say.
"anyway, do you mind if i ask…where are you staying after this?" you trailed off.
"i'll stay with higuruma for a day before moving out to my new apartment. speaking of that man, i told him to be here around midnight. so we still have four hours to be together." he answered
"...yeah."
10:00 PM
the two of you are sitting on the same seat just like this morning in the balcony. you are wearing your favorite cardigan as satoru was in his coat to fight the cold weather of the night.
all of his things were already packed and ready to leave. soon, you'll be alone and this house will not be lively as usual because his presence will be missed.
both of you refuse to say a word, yet. because you two are scared to have another breakdown that made this marriage even harder to break. especially satoru, he was aware that deep inside him he was not ready to let you go. he was just lying to himself because he is aware that he can heal if he gives himself some time.
"y/n, can i hold you here in my arms?" satoru swallowed all of the bitterness he felt for leaving you just to hold you again, for one last time. you slowly stood up from your and came towards in front of him.
your soon-to-be ex-husband gazes upon you. however, you refuse to meet those warm eyes that you loved the most. satoru slowly pulls you into his lap and cradles you like his greatest treasure, which you definitely is.
when your face hits his shoulder, you couldn't help but to hide your face deeper into his neck. "the place i'm going to stay afterwards is far from here. are you sure you will be okay?" he whispers in your ears.
"yeah, i'll be fine." you nodded solemnly. "i also planned to stop from my work for a while." you added.
"why?" satoru raises his eyebrow. he thought you loved your job as a barista. you enjoyed making coffee and wherever there's extra pastries left in the cafe, you would take it home for him to try it.
"don't worry, i had a lot of fortune that could last for a century. and besides, you even said i had a midas touch, so surviving won't be too hard for me." when your parents died, they left all of their fortune to you. so that makes you an instant millionaire and nobody knows that beside your husband.
satoru gently pushes you to meet his eyes. "i think this moment is perfect to give all of my secrets away. i don't need any perfect lies to hide from you anymore." he tucked the loose hair on the back of your ear, admiring your beautiful frame under the pale moonlight.
he gulped nervously, and for some reason, you're becoming very anxious about what he's going to tell. all you had to do was to wait for him to speak his thoughts out.
"the reason why i want to divorce is to have a new life and forget about the past. that includes you, y/n." though he only started, millions of knives already stabbed your poor heart. your eyes stared at him, a bit widely.
satoru couldn't bear to look at your pained expression, but he forced himself to look at you. so that you would feel his sincerity. "before suguru disappeared, he once told me to choose another path of life. he told me to run away from the jujutsu, run away from my life." he said, almost whispering.
"although, i want you to come with me. but…"
"i somehow got myself involved with the jujutsu too?" you continued it for him. satoru falls silent, so that means yes, it is true.
satoru cups your face. "i'm sorry, y/n. i really, really love you. but this is not the right path for us. you'll get more hurt if you continue to get tangled with me. so, after a lot of thinking and consideration…"
"i became selfish once again. i chose myself over you, y/n."
for the nth time, the walls you have been building around your emotional state are starting to shake once more. you could feel the hot tears building in your eyes.
you will not cry. you will not cry. you will not cry.
"i-i understand…although, you don't have to apologize for choosing what is the best for you. i'm actually glad that you're finally doing it." you plant your palms over his hands on your cheeks, closing your eyes to swallow up those annoying tears.
"i'm such a bad husband, aren't i?" satoru chuckles weakly. what has he done to deserve you like this? your understandment is something that he greatly admires in you. your heart is pure like an angel from above.
an angel like you can't fly down hell with him.
but god, you're making yourself willing to go down with him without any hesitation and that is just completely wrong.
and for the past years, satoru would make a mistake and you are there to correct him patiently. he would always tell himself to make something and make everything up for you. but who would have thought a divorce is the best thing to do?
"to be honest, not at all. remember what i told you before we got married? you are the fire and i'm the—"
"gasoline?"
"no silly, that's a song." your laugh brightens up the atmosphere. satoru smiled at your happy demure, he likes seeing you this joyful.
"you are the fire and i'm the fireman. a fireman would not function completely when there is no fire. meaning, why would i, a fireman, be here if there's no you, a fire." you raised your fingers to help you visualize your point.
"does that make sense to you?"
satoru shook his head. "no."
you snapped your finger. "exactly! you think i'm bad at explaining things, while i think of myself as great at explaining things. that's the same as you thinking you're a bad husband, while i think of you as a great husband."
"..."
"i made you speechless, meaning you agree and i'm great at philosophy!" you boosted yourself by imagining a crowd was giving you a round of applause.
your husband wonders for a moment before cackling a laugh. "that still didn't make sense to me but it brought a lot of comfort to me. thank you, y/n."
"come on! just admit you love my philosophical nonsense." you pouted, hitting his shoulder playfully.
satoru laughed once again, pulling you by waist as he buried his face in your hair. "of course i do. i love everything about you." and he would still do, always and forever.
"i'm going to miss this." you mumbled as you relaxed on his touch. satoru also agrees, kissing your head all over again.
"and i'm going to miss you too, a lot." he said sincerely. the two of you held the longest stare on this day. you just let yourselves drown with each other's enticing orbs.
satoru was the first one to break the record by sighing and rubbing his eyes. the truth is, he couldn't bear to look at you any longer because he could see how broken you looked through your eyes just because of him. instead, he hides his face once more on your neck.
“i'm really, really, really sorry, y/n. i'm so sorry for using you. i’m so sorry for cheating on you. i’m so sorry for hurting you. i'm so sorry for not choosing you again. i'm so sorry for being selfish. i'm so sorry for everything." there it is, again. his hot tears are back and now drenching your shoulder.
"i used you as a getaway from my sins and from the grief that day, y/n. you should've said no when i asked you to marry me, but why did you do the opposite?" his voice became slightly thicker, he's definitely frustrated.
"i did it for love, satoru." you answered without hesitation.
satoru momentarily stopped crying as his breath hitch. "yes, i'm already aware of your true intentions that day. but i still chose to marry you because i love you. i know it sounds so dumb but it's true." you continued.
you could feel his arms around your body tighten, scared of letting you go from nothing. it was like he was begging the gods, if there was one seeing the both of them right now, to let him be delusional and not take you away from him.
"let me ask you this time, do you regret marrying me?" you whispered.
your husband looked at you with unshed tears. "i don't. but i regret that this is the end of us."
why is it always the time where someone would tell their true feelings when everything is falling apart? so if this divorce wouldn't happen, does that mean his word would be forever kept inside him?
"i've always wanted to tell you that i was actually glad that you became my wife. i thought you would be my endgame. instead, you became the reason why i am still here and breathing."
the void of regret is slowly pulling him inside. but you are there to make sure that he would survive the gravitational pull. you just loved him so you will help to let you go.
"i love you, my sweetheart, my y/n, m-my wife..."
12:00 AM
it was quiet, really, really quiet. higuruma was looking at the two of you all over again. his eyes showed sympathy for both of you and he was sad because this is the end for you and satoru.
right now, both of you are staring blankly at the divorce paper on the table. no one was making a first move by signing it.
you let out a sigh, a heavy feeling was buried deep in your heart. your whole body feels so numb and you still haven't cried for today. everything feels so wrong, yet at the same time it feels right. you don't know what to do anymore.
as you recall your conversation with him, you just wished it didn't end and would continue forever. because you know you'll never get tired of hearing his voice, his laugh, and his philosophical nonsense too.
not to mention, you've also dreamed of building a family with him. a mini satoru and mini y/n sounds nice, doesn't it? as your eyes wandered across this apartment, you can depict your children with him running around. god, if you were dreaming, please don't wake up.
"higuruma, can you please just wait for me in the car…? i-i would like to have a final conversation with my wife." satoru suddenly spoke and nanami left without hesitation.
"so this is it?"
"yeah, t-this is the end." satoru chuckles breathlessly. there was like a big chuck on his throat that made him feel suffocating. truth to be told, he doesn't want this to be the end. but again, he has to.
"thank you for giving me a total of the best six years of my life, toru. i mean it, thank you." you counted the first four years of your relationship and the two years of your marriage. playing with your hands to mend the shakiness, it was a constant reminder that only a few minutes left before the surname satoru would be stripped of your name.
"thank you too, y/n. i also had so much fun and love these past six years. thank you for all of the things you have done for me." he said silently.
all this time, you are the only one looking at him because his eyes were focused on the paper in front of him. "good luck on your new path. i wish you the best." you intentionally called his attention.
"you're really staying here in this apartment…alone?" satoru asked you.
you let yourself smile slightly as you shifted into a more comfortable position. "yeah… just in case you feel homesick, this would be a reminder that you still have a home…only if you want to." the air in this room is very thick and it's suffocating you.
"t-thank you, y/n, really." he expressed his gratitude once again.
a nagging feeling tells you that satoru was about to go back on his decision at any minute. and you too would probably go back to your decisions you had set for both of you. it would be more devastating for you if satoru didn't achieve his plans for himself in the near future.
"let's not make higuruma wait."
satoru falls silent. now he was stuck in a madness of a dilemma. in short, he was starting to rethink his decision to the point that he didn't notice he was staining the divorce paper with tears. his hands began to shake violently along with his cries becoming louder any minute.
satoru finally lost his cool as he wailed loudly in front of you. the sound of his sobs made you clench your lip as your chest tightened once more.
you on the other hand, you're trying your best not to slip any tears down from your cheeks. you successfully stopped them from falling this morning, you couldn't afford to cry not because there's only a few minutes left before you would let yourself fall into a pit of sadness.
sensing that neither of you would make a move, you are aware that satoru couldn't bring himself to do it even though he had to. so, you gently steal the paper away from him.
divorce agreement…it read. oh how you despise those two words.
"satoru, i mentioned to you a while ago that the reason why i want to spend this last day as a married couple is because i want us to leave without holding any regrets." you started with your pen touching the paper. satoru's eyes widened, he wanted to stop you from doing it but nothing was coming out from his mouth.
"i can see it in your eyes, you're doubting your decisions." you continued as you wrote your name. in satoru's horror, only your signature is needed and everything would be over for him.
however, you stopped writing. you tapped the table to gather his attention to you. there he saw you smiling dearly at him.
"did you have fun spending time with me this whole day?" satoru knows your intention. you are encouraging him to do what he was supposed to do even if it means leaving you.
"yes…yes i do, i enjoyed being with you." he stuttered. the tears were still streaming down his face and he was using his sleeve to wipe it. you reached for the tissue and gave it to satoru as you watched him wiped his eyes and blow his nose.
"that's good to hear. i also had fun being with you. not only for this day, but the whole time i was with you, i enjoyed it." you grabbed his hands to soothe it by massaging those long and calloused fingers. satoru watches you and eventually becomes slightly calm by your actions.
you inched your lips into his fingers and kissed it delicately just like he used to do with you before. everything went blur to him and only the sound of your sweet nothing was audible into his messy world.
"i know you'll be doing great with or without me. so satoru, put more faith in yourself. this is another big step for us, and i want you to be ready just like i am." you swiftly slide the divorce paper in front of him. but this time, it has your signature on it.
satoru felt like he was being showered by the cold water as he stared at the paper with pure horror evident on his face. you finally did it, so there is no turning back now.
"h-how—when…! when did you sign it?" his voice cracked due to his frazzled emotions firing him repeatedly. satoru reaches the highest point of heartbreak he ever experienced in his life.
"when i gave you the tissue." you whispered weakly. to your dismay tears are only a slip away from your eyes a thousand times today.
"i don't want to sign it. i don't want to! i don't want to leave you anymore y/n!" he yelled. you accepted his lash out with open arms, but you can't do anything anymore. you finally signed the divorce settlement, and this paper wouldn't go if there's no signature of satoru.
you suddenly pull him into a passionate yet heartbroken kiss to shut him up. satoru eventually responds to your kiss, becoming more emotional than ever. while you are busy keeping him in company, you sneakily put the pen in his hand.
satoru felt an object in his palm, he knew you're telepathically telling him to sign the paper but he still refuses to acknowledge it, at least not yet. as he continues to devour your lips, his eyes are still producing salt tears that add more emotions in the atmosphere.
"i could see a bright future ahead of you, satoru." you muttered between the kisses.
"mhmp—you should grab it, please." you continued to deepen the kiss to lure him. but he voluntarily stepped away just to make a counter argument for that.
"but i could lose you if i do that." he whispers solemnly.
"we've already lost each other when we realized that everything was going too fast for both of us." you chuckled bitterly at your statement. "that it why it is time to face the consequences, by setting us free." you added.
"do…do you really want to do this?" he hiccups.
"this is what fate wants us to do." your voice is soothing as hell. it held no grudges nor resentment, just pure calm and adoration towards him.
but satoru still didn't bug and he still doesn't want to sign the papers.
your gaze never leaves him as satoru buries his face on his palm, weeping so quietly that you could almost hear a pin drop. it was getting so hard to watch so you looked away and slowly walked away.
"i am going out for a bit." you mumbled quietly, not waiting for him to reply or look as you walked away with your whole body shaking.
outside, there you saw higuruma leaning on his car exterior. "hey…" you greeted weakly. higuruma looked at you with a hint of sympathy in his eyes.
"hey…how did it go?" higuruma asked, his gaze falling on the papers in your hands.
"emotional." you joked.
"so, that's the end now?"
"...yep, that's the end now."
silence engulfed both of you, just your almost steady breathings and his observing orbs burning through your skin.
"never thought satoru could cry harder than he did when geto-san…you know." higuruma said, sighing as he tucks his hands on his pockets.
you nodded. "i know. satoru lost suguru literally, while he only lost me through relationship. he'd become more vulnerable around me, and that scares the hell out of me."
"i, his weakness, has become more exposed to his enemies. i know sooner or later, they would swoon to get me just to make him fall on his knees. we don't want that to happen, i don't want to be a bait nor a cause of his downfall. temporarily or permanently, satoru must not fall, no, not anymore." you continued.
"y/n-san, i hope you would also realize that failures, downfalls, mistakes, and damages are unavoidable, gojo-kun is no exception to all of that." higuruma argues.
"satoru is going to live a good life and have a future that he deserves, so who am i to halt it?” you ignored what he said because you know he was right.
“this is a big step for both of you. i just wished that everything would go well for the two of you.” higuruma smiled at you.
“we will, eventually.” you return the smile and then excuse yourself to go back inside, just to see satoru still crying nonstop.
approaching his figure, you wrapped your arms around his body to console the man. “don't go back to me now, satoru. if you cannot bring yourself to let go, then i will help you.” you whispered into his hair.
satoru pulled away just to look at you with his teary eyes. “i’m sorry, y/n. i’m really sorry.” he keeps on apologizing to you, while you just smile at him and wipe the tears in his eyes.
“it's alright, satoru. i already forgave you a long time ago.” you said.
“i can't sign it. i don't want to sign that anymore.” he confessed. a small form made its way to your temple” “but this is for both of us. don't you want to have a brand new start? how can we thrive when we both have shackles on our feet?”
“i-i thought everything was easy. i thought i could l-let you go that easily. but i was wrong. it's so hard to let go of us, y/n. and as much as i would like to do what i meant to do, it's just so hard to see us disappear from our now individual lives.” satoru buries his face on your stomach. your hands immediately made its way towards his hair as tears are threatening you once again.
“it's hard to let you go too, satoru. but it would be harder to see you suffer more when you're here with me.” it was getting late and satoru was still amidst the crisis, but you are determined to get him out of there.
“look at me, toru.” you cupped his cheeks and made him look at you. “you’ve still got a whole world to see. so don't you ever get worried about me because i’ll be more happy to see you free without any worries.
“go live a life that you weren't able to do when we were still kids. do what you always wanted to do.”
“and just so you know, i will always love you and you will always have a special place in my home.” you put his hand to your left chest where your heart lies. “here, satoru. you'll always be here.”
satoru pulled you into the tightest hug since it was literally the last and you wouldn't mind. reciprocating the hug, you finally smiled whole-heartedly and it even reached your eyes.
“whatever happens, i love you, y/n. i love you more than anything. i have loved you since the first time i saw you. and i will always love you even if this would be the last time i would see you.” throughout the six years that you two had been together, from boyfriend-girfriend relationship until to marriage—this was the very first time he declared his love to you with so much intensity.
your eyes nearly gave up on how long you've been trying to hold your tears. but you still swore that night that you'll never shed a tear unless satoru is out of the scene because you knew how much effect your crying causes him.
to hide your emotions, you pull him closer and share the last and passionate kiss as two persons who share the same surname are binded by the law. both of you could feel the emotions begin to overflow as things become more sensitive.
you were the first one to pull away as satoru was still crying. cradling his cheeks, you connected your foreheads together and said again, “let's not make higuruma wait any further.”
satoru knew it was time, time for him to finally sign the divorce paper that he's been planning for a month now.
he expected this one too just like you, so it shouldn't hurt, but why is his heart still aching? with a final stroke of his signature, satoru felt so empty. his soul feels like missing and something was taken away from him.
both have done it—a trial away and the marriage will no longer be valid. there would be no mr. and mrs. gojo now because both will live differently.
grabbing the paper with your shaky hands, you turn around at satoru and give him the final hug with a final kiss. “good luck on your new life, satoru. i’ll always cheer for you and support you until the end.”
“thank you so much, y/n. i really mean it.”
and with that, you and satoru shared the same sad smile you could utter at that moment. sure, this night will end bittersweet, but tomorrow is a brand new start.
you watched satoru walk solemnly towards the car. he looked like a ghost wandering around the vicinity without any will to search for the true paradise for him to rest. it really broke your heart that this is the end for both of you.
and with now fully signatured divorce paper on his hands, satoru felt that each step he took, he felt like fainting on the spot because of how devastating he felt.
but you cannot undo everything now. satoru had officially become your sweet memory and a stranger on the street at the same time. just as he was about to go inside the car, you called out for his name one last time.
your ex-husband looked at you with tired, red, and puffy eyes. you let yourself give the bestest smile you could offer at this moment. a smile entitled one last smile before saying a goodbye.
"if we found each other in another world, let me be your wife again!"
satoru's eyes glisten with tears once more. nevertheless, he also offers you the bestest smile he could manage. he is now letting his broken heart go out of your grasp. forcing himself to swallow and accept that in this lifetime, you are no longer his.
but if the two of you would be reborn or somewhere in the multiverse, he would pray that the two of you got the life you onced failed to build, and that was something he would wish for forever.
"of course! and i will choose you this time. we would make a family that we once dreamt of, and i will give you the honor to name our children." satoru yelled back, making your smile widen.
you could finally rest knowing that there would be a lifetime waiting for both of you somewhere in the future. and this time, you are not being delusional because you know it'll be going to happen and you'll make it happen.
"emi!"
"what?" satoru halted his steps to focus his attention on you.
"i want our first born daughter to be named emi." you've actually dreamed of having a child with him, in that dream, her name is emi. it was like a sign to you, so when you woke up, you immediately searched its meaning and found out that emi means blessed.
you are blessed.
both of you definitely feel blessed to have each other.
that being said, you have kept that name for a while now. sooner, you wished that name would be used with satoru's surname entangled to it.
because in this life, it was unfortunate not to use the name emi. you only want to use that name with him and only him. for you lived with him, loved him, and dreamed with him.
but patience is a virtue. you are willing to wait for that dream, for him. time is not a problem to you because you'd be fully patient just for him.
"have a safe journey, gojo satoru. i will be waiting for you in our next lives." you gently bow your head to send your wish for his safety.
with that, satoru enters the car without looking at you anymore. he was afraid that if he looked at you, he might find himself running back into your loving arms again.
"we'll be going now, y/n." higuruma rolled the window and waved a farewell to you.
you just nod at him while you watch the car slowly disappear from your eyesight. sad but true, you will be waking up all alone from now on 'till your thirties.
no more satoru to wake you up with cuddles. no more satoru who would make corny jokes randomly. no more satoru to who would always remind you that you have a husband. just no more satoru gojo—
drip…
a tear, followed by another, and another until it just flows uncontrollably. you are finally a crying-mess. you're letting yourself cry and let your emotions out by a shout of pain escaping out from your lips.
it was all over.
satoru chooses his life over you, and you choose satoru over your life. with your knees planted on the pavement, your hand travels towards your mouth to cover your loud painful sobs.
all of the tears that you had been keeping since this morning, finally had their freedom to flow at your cheeks along with anguish scream that came out of your broken heart.
you finally lost this time.
[a special chapter will be posted soon, so stay tuned and just comment if you want to be added on the taglist for this one — ©luvvixu2024]
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ceilidho · 3 months
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This is in no way of hating but i want to know why do you enjoy writing noncon/rape? When I first downloaded tumblr which was couple of months ago i was surprised by the amount of noncon fics here. I eventually came to enjoy them which makes me question myself. Whenever i read a noncon fic and enjoy it i feel like im betraying women who actually went through those traumatic events. Plus I actually don't really like dark romance books? I love cod dead dove and that is mainly because i really love the characters and the authors are so talented. I rambled so much and i hope you don't get this in the wrong way i don't mean to hate AT ALL i love the stuff you write. Maybe i shouldn't think too much and let myself enjoy what im reading lol
first of all, no worries! i wasn't sure about your tone/intentions at first, but by the end i was totally fine with the question.
i actually don't mind talking about this stuff - i just sometimes avoid it on main because i prefer chatting about it privately.
second, i'm no psychologist or sociologist, so i probably won't be able to give you the most satisfactory answer, but i think there are a lot of different reasons. i can only name a few. one thing i should mention right off the bat is that rape fantasies are very normal (and this is true whether you're a survivor of SA or not) and writing/reading fiction can be a safe way to process those thoughts/feelings.
one of prevailing reasons is, of course, that many survivors of SA use noncon/dubcon literature/art as a way of processing their experiences and taking ownership of their trauma.
and look, people are going to go back and forth on this point (i've seen it all before - many people refuse to believe that engaging with noncon lit/art is helpful, and in fairness, it's NOT helpful for everyone because every person is different), but at the end of the day, if a survivor tells you "writing/reading this was helpful in my recovery" then that's that!
additionally, for many women and non-binary folk (i can only speak as a cis woman, but i'm sure this is a shared lived experience across many different people), we're also taught from a very young age to suppress our sexual desires / that being open about our sexuality is morally reprehensible and shameful. and a lot of people carry that shame for years, impacting them well into adulthood. so dubcon/noncon fantasies can be a way of being able to enjoy sexual scenarios where you don't have to be the initiator, thus taking away some of the emotional weight and shame.
plus, at the end of the day (and im sure many people will disagree with this take, it's something that i'm still figuring out myself), there is a kind of weird underlying consent implicit in dark fics. like, you might be reading a fic or novel that's ostensibly noncon, but you're also actively seeking out that literature (hopefully it's not just sprung on you - i do very much agree with tagging to the fullest extent and my lukewarm take is that I think all books, even traditionally published ones, should come with content/trigger warnings too).
there are a medley of reasons why someone might write or read dark fiction/dark romance. again, i'm just one person and i can only speak from my own experience!
i think at the end of the day, the important thing to realize is that fiction is fake, and as long as the writer appropriately tags their work and ensures that the audience is aware of what they're getting into when they start reading, they're not coercing the reader into something they aren't prepared for.
and it's totally fine if you have limits (like, you can read and enjoy dubcon, but not noncon) or can't engage with the material at all, but it's also unfair to say that it reflects someone's real life values - the same way that we don't say that the people who enjoy crime fiction must love murder.
and the last thing i want to say because this got a bit out of hand lol, is that, yes, for some people dark fiction is genuinely harmful, whether or not they're a survivor. it's not for everyone and that's completely fine and i'm aware of that, which is why i agree that you should tag as much as possible (even if you feel like you're overdoing it sometimes), but someone else's discomfort doesn't give them the right to tell you how to process your own emotions/experiences/desires/etc.
as long as no one's getting hurt, there's no issue as far as i'm concerned. and sorry but, no one's getting hurt by reading a fic or a novel unless the author didn't give proper content warnings - if you "forgot" to read the tags or read anyway DESPITE being warned, im sorry but that's life.
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pinkaditty · 1 year
Note
Hi, hi!
I loved your perverted obey me brothers and you catching them with your underwear. Will you make a part 2 with the other dateables?
If not, no worries!!
I love your work and I hope you have a nice day!
anon. did u know that ur my first ask? did u know that anon? ily. i've been thinking abt this ask since i saw i first got it. i never knew getting an ask could be so euphoric.
anyways
Pervert (Obey Me: Shall We Date) Part 2!
summary: you are suspecting that someone is stealing your underwear. it will go missing and randomly reappear like it was never gone. you pretend not to notice, but set a little trap for the culprit… and catch them red handed.
a/n: folks. wow. i did not expect part 1 to be soso popular omg!! ily guys thanks so much for enjoying my stuff waaaah! sorry this second part took so fucking long man so much shit happened. like sooo much im so tired. anyways. here. this part includes the royals, angel, and human. ill be back with the others (thirteen, mephisto, and raphael) soon! they may be slightly ooc bc im unfamiliar with them but ill do my best! also im like literally praying that the characters i wrote here aren't ooc. I tried SO hard please lmk if they are. &lt;;/3
content warning: as usual fem!mc unless you like to imagine yours as a crossdresser (mc's physical attributes are not mentioned but fem undergarments are), and suggestive nsfw content! lmk if there's anything i missed :(
read part 1 here!
AS USUAL MINORS DNI PLEASE! PLEASE RESPECT MY BOUNDARY! THANK YOU!
Intro:
For a short while, you had been reassigned to stay at Purgatory Hall/The Demon Lord’s Castle/wherever else the Dateables are due to Satan having accidentally destroyed your section of the House of Lamentation. No big deal, but all of the brothers were less than happy to see you go. It’s okay, though. You’ll be fine among the others…
The story is the same, of course. You think someone has been nicking your intimates in their spare time. Which is, of course, strange but simultaneously exciting. 
You decide to set a trap to find out who they are, leaving your hamper full of clothes in the washroom before leaving to grab some scent beads. When you return, as expected, you can hear someone rifling through your intimates, but it’s not rushed. Rather, it’s calm and calculated, as though said person was desperate to not be heard. You decide to wait outside the door for them. Once they collect the spoils of their work, they quietly slip through the door, only to find you leaning against the wall outside, looking at them expectantly. Your arms are crossed and you’re tapping your fingers on your arm. You raise an eyebrow at them, stifling the urge to cackle at their panicked expression.
“Explain yourself, pervert.” 
Diavolo:
You know, simultaneously, you expected him and didn’t expect him at all - at the same time. It wasn’t exactly a secret that Dia was fascinated with humans, especially with you, but… To such lengths? Really? If only Barbatos could see him now. 
For a man that loves to talk… He sure is speechless now.
He’s frozen. The panicked expression remains on his face, his eyes flickering from the surrounding hallways and walls to you, to the floor, and back to the hallways. If there was a way out, he couldn’t find it. Before long, he deflated, resigning to looking down, a pitiful pout on his face. You got the feeling it was partially for show, though.
He whimpered like a hurt puppy before muttering a very formal apology. Keeping his head down, he held out the panties towards you. As you watch him, you realize this man has probably rarely ever felt shame before. It's almost entertaining - watching his eyes spin as he tries to adjust to feeling this way. Though he tries to hide it, you can hear his heaving breaths from here. He was ashamed. You could tell he wasn't ashamed for his actions; rather, he was ashamed because he was caught.
The thought makes you want to laugh, and you do, snatching the panties from his waiting hand. He looks up as you laugh, confused, his lips in a soft pout. His eyes almost look teary, as though he's that sad that you're laughing at him. You stifle your laughter with a hand and wave it off, walking past him into the laundry room to put your panties back in the hamper. Once your laughter dies out, you don't face him, but you do speak to him, knowing he is listening.
"Dia, the next time you find yourself fascinated with me, you can just ask. I'll be happy to spare a worn pair for your sake." 
You hear a surprised gasp, a shuffling of feet, and a relieved exhale. You turn to him, finally, to see him bowing his head in thanks. He's biting his lip and his face is bright red. Probably too embarrassed to make eye contact. He covers his mouth with his hand, muffling his words before speaking.
"Thank you, MC, for letting this slide… And please, don't tell Barbatos…" His face burns red at his final words, and you smile, amused.
"Don't worry, I won't tell." You wink at him before returning to your laundry, hearing his hesitant steps as he walked away.
Barbatos:
He's frozen. Mortified. He stands there, rooted to the spot like a statue of stone. He stammers out your name in surprise, nervously shifting his gaze from you to your surroundings. He clears his throat, holding a hand up to his lips, and keeps it there, as though attempting to hide his growing blush. "I-I deeply apologize, MC. I should not have been here… You were not meant to see me… " He sounds out of breath, his words light and mumbled.
He turns away from you at an angle, shutting his eyes tight and keeping his hand in front of his face. You watch him take deep breaths and attempt to steady himself and regain his composure. You had to admit, watching him fumble through such an embarrassment was awfully entertaining. His chest visibly rose and fell with each audible breath. He gently teetered on his feet, as though he could fall over if he couldn't keep up. What a sight to behold, Barbatos at a loss for words and composure. 
You approach him quietly, walking slowly to prevent the click of your shoes from being heard. You know that while he can't hear you, he can feel you, and he knows you're close. He shuffles backwards shyly, attempting to replace the distance you remove with every step. Ultimately, however, he is too slow, and you manage to get close enough to him, cornering him against a wall inside the laundry room. You make no effort to cage him in, but simply watch as he continues to attempt to get ahold of himself. He swallows thickly and slowly opens his eyes, calming down. He lowers his hand back to his side, and looks at you levelly, his expression still embarrassed but not mortified any longer. You smile, raising an eyebrow.
"I'd like my panties now, thanks." You hold out a hand expectantly, and Barbatos obliges, pulling the panties from his coat pocket and placing them in your waiting hand, all signs of embarrassment gone from his face, replaced by his trademark smile instead. His ears however, were a dead giveaway, as the tips of them remained red. You simply chuckle and lean away from him, humming in thanks and placing them back into the hamper. He moves to assist you with your clothes, and does so efficiently, though you watch him carefully to ensure his nimble fingers don’t grab hold of anything else without your permission. When the task is finished, he bows respectfully.
“Is there anything else I can assist you with, MC?” 
You shake your head, smiling. “No, but thank you, Barbatos.”
With that done, his ears still burning red and his smile faltering slightly, he moves to leave. You stop him, grabbing his arm as he passes you. He looks back at you curiously, embarrassment still painted on his face. “And, please, ask me next time.” You smile, your eyes filling with mirth. “I’d be happy to give you a pair later as thanks for your assistance.”
He swallows thickly and his eyes widen. He bites his lip before nodding, thanking you briskly, and walking away hurriedly, his face red.
You think you see a flash of lace in his back pocket as he leaves, but maybe you’re imagining it...
Simeon:
Now, this was a surprise. The angel? Really?
He yelps in surprise, fumbling with the panties and dropping them on the ground, hiding his face in his hands and backing into a wall. He’s visibly shaking, his hands trembling as he hides behind them, not even peeking out to observe your reaction. His knees wobbled and he began to shrink in on himself, eventually kneeling on the floor. You watch him wordlessly, amused. He’s unexpectedly quite dramatic. 
After a few moments, you hear him mumbling to himself. Confused, you tentatively approach him, listening carefully. You catch little bits of what he’s saying before kneeling down, to which he shrinks further and his mumbling speed increases. Then it hits you. He’s… praying.
He’s literally fucking praying. 
You are so thoroughly amused at this that you want to laugh, but you wonder if being a victim of the wrath of Simeon or the almighty was worth it, so you decide against it. You stifle and disguise your laugh as clearing your throat, doing a comically loud “Ahem” to get Simeon’s attention.
Not one to be disobedient, he stops his muttering and slowly lifts his head to look at you. You smile smugly at him, your eyes narrowing with mirth. You reach out towards him and gently touch his chin. He flinches, but doesn’t pull away, looking between your fingers and your face curiously. You hold his chin and lift it upwards, and he follows your movements, adjusting himself so it’s easier to peer upwards at you. You smile wider, even more amused than before. 
“I don’t think that’ll work down here, Simeon.” Your voice is low and taunting, and Simeon gulps, his eyes still not leaving yours. He still doesn’t say anything, merely trembles, as though he were being judged.
Maybe he was, a little bit, but favorably so. It’s not everyday you’d find an angel ballsy enough to do this, right?
You tut at him, clicking your tongue and shaking your head disapprovingly. “Oh, Simeon…” You put on a fake pout, looking at him with pity in your eyes. “Don’t you know better than to do this?”
“Ugh…” Simeon bites his lip. His eyebrows furrow and his mouth creases downwards into a pathetic expression. You continued to stifle your laughter by biting the inside of your cheek. However, you are ultimately unsuccessful and end up bursting into an amused smile and a few breathy chuckles at him. 
When your laughter dies down, you look at him, still holding his chin. “Come now, Simeon.” You smile, winking at him. “All you have to do is ask… If you‘d like another pair.”
Simeon sucks in a breath in shock, and his eyes widen as he looks at you. He suddenly scrambles to his feet, straightening up, his head still bent forward in embarrassment. 
“I-I’m sorry, MC! It won’t happen again!” He swiftly walks past you, not looking at you and barely opening his eyes enough to see, narrowly missing the wall in his rush to leave. You listen to his retreating footsteps and only laugh. Maybe you’d drop by his room later and give him a gift.
Solomon: 
Shameless. But he’s old and barely human. He’s also the worst.
He doesn’t react much besides his initial panicked reaction, which soon melts into mirth, a smug smile appearing on his face. He’s confident, but not that confident. His exaggerated smug smile twitches at the corners and his face remains flushed a deep red. He dramatically clears his throat and smiles coyly, the picture of a wolf in sheep’s clothing. “Ah…” He starts, shrugging his shoulders, still smiling, the corners of his lips still twitching. His voice shakes just slightly. “You got me!”
Your face can’t seem to decide if it wants to fall into a disappointed expression at his brazen admission or burst into a fit of laughter at his obvious fear. Instead, it seems to settle on a pitying smirk, and you have to stop it from turning into a full on grin. You sigh and shake your head, not super surprised. 
You approach him, and he visibly stiffens, but his arrogance forces him to stay in place, his confidence crumbling at your certainty. When you stand just in front of him, you hold out your hand, a smug look on your face. “I’ve got you indeed! Hand them over.” Your words are quick and terse, smug smile and knowing look still on your face. Solomon swallows, and looks to the side, gently dropping the panties into your hands. He makes no move to look at you again after that, still facing you but looking away. 
You scoff as you watch him simply stand there. You find it amusing, but you are also dissatisfied at his lack of retorts. You put your hands on your hips and smirk, attempting to provoke him. “Hm. I’d expect a panty thief to be more ballsy. What, cat got your tongue?” Your smug smile only grows and your eyes narrow with mirth. His confidence almost seems to fully crumble under your gaze, and he relents, his blush spreading all across his face. Yet still, he remains silent.
You approach further, your steps slow and deliberately intimidating. He’s rooted to the spot, unable to move, still frantically finding anything to gaze at instead of you. Eventually you stand mere centimeters from him, your body just barely touching his. You smirk at him and lean your head forward, blowing on him before pulling back. He flinches immediately, startled, and bumps into the wall behind him. You giggle at him, thoroughly amused at his frantic nerves. He looks at you pathetically, lips red from worrying at them with his teeth, pupils blown wide, red blush from his forehead to his neck. 
“Aw, don’t look at me like that~!” You tease him, pressing your finger into his cheek. He watches you warily, seemingly at a loss for words. Your lips pull into a wicked smile. “How long has it been, hm?”
Immediately his eyes widen and he stammers out some indignant words, trying to deflect and explain himself. You only laugh at his stammered words, and he eventually stops, worrying at his lips again with his teeth. “Oh, don’t worry, I imagine you have plenty of escapades. But why couldn’t you just ask me?” You tilt your head at him, looking at him with hooded eyes. “Hm? It couldn’t have been that hard to just ask.”
Surprisingly, he only sighs and shakes his head, blush still present. “My dear apprentice, I am only human. Even I still don’t know how to properly act in the face of attraction.” A small, wobbly smile pulls at his lips before he purses his lips again, biting down to stifle any further words. His answer was straightforward, but you can tell he is still nervous. His breathing remains heavy, his eyes are still wide, and he’s still covered in a crimson blush. You laugh again.
Instead of teasing him further, though you really want to, you smile. “Well, now you know. Simply ask, Solomon. I am willing to help you… if you want me to.” You smile before turning away, dropping the panties into your clothes hamper, and starting the wash. It takes Solomon a moment to snap out of it and leave, but he does. You could feel his eyes on you and his magic still lingers in the air.
a/n: *super saiyan yells* thank you for reading waaaaaah! i did my best and im soso sorry if any of these characs are ooc... if they are too ooc i might actually rewrite it fr im so scared :(
anyways as usual feedback is always appreciated, and so are comments, likes, reblogs and asks! (especially asks) please show me your appreciation! i love to know i've done a good job.
@ikevampharem asked to be tagged :3!
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yintsukareta · 1 year
Text
caelus, gep, n jing yuan x sleepy! reader
some hcs bc i CANNOT get out of bed currently pls help
caelus:
my little gremlin,,,
hes fine w/ it but sometimes he wants to do fun stuff with you
like digging through trashcans...
but sometimes hes def sneaking off to do some stupid shit that u would normally disapprove of
like ur in bed and u hear a shout from a mile away bc caelus is setting something on fire,,, for fun curiosity
sometimes likes to carry u piggyback while he walks around places
seeing u on his back sleeping while he walks is a normal occurrence for the astral express crew
loves to hug u v v tightly bc u look too cute to resist
like a little plushie,,,,
SPEAKING OF PLUSHIES
he def sees one n buys it 4 u
he then goes to ur room n sees u sleeping w it like hdjsk
he then suffocates u by hugging u
rip u ig 🙏
gepard
the first time u guys met was when u fell asleep,,,,
in the middle of the plaza
deadass thought u died and got worried
he rushed u to like the nearest clinic for help
he then found out u were just sleeping
sometimes he sees u asleep somewhere else while hes on patrol
he sometimes likes to stop 4 a bit and admire u sleeping
if u woke up while he did then u could see a faint blush on his cheeks bc he finds u so so cute
when he gets home from work he likes to lay in bed w u
he cooks dinner 4 u a LOT bc ur too sleepy to get out of bed n make some
absolute malewife (can confirm, am his husband)
but sometimes when he sees u asleep he kisses ur forehead :3c
jing yuan
sleeping buddies
he lets u sleep in his lap while he works on stuff
one time one of his subordinates went into the room and he shushed them
"shh my spouse is sleeping rn" "you have a SPOUSE?!??" "not yet"
loves to hold u while the two of u sleep together
he loves to lay his head on ur shoulder or in ur chest, and same w/ u vice versa
he sometimes likes to run his fingers through ur hair while u sleep
or sometimes he likes to slightly massage ur head while ur falling asleep
he loves to dig his head into ur chest when hes too sleepy to work jsut to make an excuse to his retainers like "im spending time here w my s/o pls leave"
a lot of times he stops working to go sleep with you
glad that ur very sleepy bc he uses it as an excuse to leave work all the time sometimes
edit: i realised i made a mistake and used fem pronouns/terms on jing yuan's part. edited! sorry !!!! :(
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Note
Hello there!! It’s 🦐 anon back at it again and I have another request if that’s okay.
I don’t know what character limit is the max, but could I have some headcanons for when Jeff, Toby and ben have a crush obsession on someone (reader) , but they discover they’re already dating someone else? What would they do? (Seperately)
If you can’t do 3, only doing Jeff and ben is fine! Just thought of this idea and you’re one of my favourite writers that’s active in here, so I came to you!! Have fun if you end up writing this. Have a lovely day.
-🦐
It's always ok to ask for stuff! And don't worry about character limit because i think the absolute most id be willing to do is maybe 10 per ask
Also it makes me smile to see that im one of someone's favorite writers 💞💞
Tw: stalking and obsessive behavior
Thank you so much for requesting!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Jeff
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Jeff doesn't really like people all that much
And as we know, he is very self absorbed
So if he actually finds himself enjoying you, let alone loving you, he assumes that you should automatically love him as well
He spends every second he can watching you through your windows, learning your schedule, all of your favorite things, etc, etc
And eventually, he builds up enough courage to sneak into your house while you are away
He smells your clothes, cherishing the heavenly scent
He steals one of your t-shirts and steals your toothbrush (definetly not to brush his own teeth with)
He snags your perfume/cologne as well, so that he can always smell like you
And with all of his treasures in his pockets, he sneaks back out
He continues this cycle for weeks until one day, you bring someone else home with you
"One of their friends" he tells himself, jealousy already boiling in his heart
But when he sees you look up at them with your gorgeous eyes, and sees you kiss them, he snaps
He is seeing red as he breaks through the window, killing your partner in cold blood
He feels betrayed, how could you do something like this to him?
He ends up knocking you out, and bringing you back to his home, where he ties you to his bed and waits for you to wake up
Because you have got some major explaining to do...
Toby
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Toby finds himself feeling like a lost puppy around you
He loves you, oh lord he loves you
But he can't have you know that yet
If you were to see him, see the things he's done, that'd scare you off for sure
And so he watches you from afar
He watches you when you go to work, he watches you as you head home, he sits closely by you when you're at a resteraunt
He doesn't ever allow himself to break into your home (unlike SOMEONE on this list 😒)
But if you ever drop something, say, a piece of trash, or maybe something falls out of your pocket, he swarms all over that
He has a special little drawer in his nightstand full of all of the things he's collected from you
But lately, he's been noticing a...shift...in your schedule
Meeting the same person over and over again, until one day, his worst fears are confirmed
As you make your plans with them, you share a sweet kiss and walk away, holding hands as you do so
This breaks him
He can feel his heart aching, as he knows that he's lost you
He blames it on himself "if I had just talked to them sooner"
He can't bring himself to hurt them, though
And, they can't be all that bad if they make you happy
And so, he allows this person to keep dating you, continuing to stalk you from the shadows, waiting for the day that you leave them, and his chance will be presented again
BEN
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Ben has a....knack, for finding people
It's almost like scrolling through the front page of social media to him
Scrolling past an endless sea of countless faces, watching videos, playing games, streaming, etc
But one day, he found you
Your gorgeous face entranced him almost immediately
And by the end of the first five minutes of just staring at you, he knew that he needed you
He comes back to you, day after day, saving all that you watch in his own personal playlist
If you like video games, he will know, and he will send you all of the games you could ever want
You don't know where they're coming from, but you aren't complaining
He occassionally peers through your electronics cameras, and just watches you sleep
You look so nice and cozy, he wishes he could be there with you, holding you, keeping you safe
And one day, he notices a new person coming into the picture
A....romantic interest of yours
He can't have that.
And so he hacks them. He leaks their adress, he posts life ruining things on their socials, even going as far as to make them think that you are doing these things, making them hate you and putting more and more strain on your relationship
Eventually, you break up, unknowing that BEN was behind it all
And he's been sending you love messages along the way
Little gifts he knows youd like too
And now he can make himself known to you, as an angel, a savior, rather than the monster that had ruined your relationship with your partner
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jazzyblusnowflake · 6 months
Note
OMG hi…I really like your art and was wondering if you wanna be mutuals??????????? Also tell me about your MD ships :3c
honey we are dating- .....okay yknow what- HI PRETTY & TALENTED LADY- yess i will absolutely love toooo 🙈💕💕💕💕💕
also lets see uhhh okay this is an excuse for me to just... expload-
keep in mind not every ship is meant for all of you so dont badger me about stuff that ISNT CANON or YOU DONT SHIP. contrary to whatever you believe, when somone posts about THEIR ships, nobody wants to hear about you NOT shipping it on THAT EXACT post.
hang in there, this gon be a long one >:p
First off we are starting strong with Nuzi- Biscuitbites obviously thats a given- these two just have too much to be said about why and how they make eachother the best version of eachother, whether they ever became canon or not- they fit like puzzle pieces- they lessen eachothers negative traits by being their for eachother.
next is Vuzi- Violentviolet, they are my favorite kind of enemies to lovers 😔 but its also tragic smh. kinda pissed off at how V always does something good in Uzis favor only when she is LITERALLY PASSED OUT- either in the camp ep on the bus or in Alices lab. like damn ofFUCKINGcourse Uzi wouldnt know she cares about her 😭😭😭
envuzi- Violentbitingbiscuits, i love these goobers with all my heart- they deserve the best 😔💕💕💕💕
envy - [does this poor ship just NOT have an exclusive FINDABLE tag name??? im calling them GoldenMemories...], i like to think that if they were in the manor still, and nothing bad had ever happened, these two would be comforting eachother in the healthiest way possible. V needs someone like N and N is just adorable like that uwu
Next we have JxTessa/Jessa- [calling them Fancyblades cuz why not-] J deserves some closure for the shit shes gone through smhhh 😔, its a tragic yuri of J loving and wanting something she probably already accepted she couldnt have, and even then she gotta deal with Ns ass being the favorite one regardless of how hard she tries to be perfect... sighhh i wanna imagine them in a future where Tessa was spared as the only human and J could save her 😭😭😭😭 Tessa might have loved doing mechanical stuff or wore black to hide grease/oil stains on her clothes from her parents and wore gloves to hide her oily stained hands- i want her to have a scene of wiring drones back to life and saving them and saying something like "hey there, you made it! dont worry, ill take care of you, youre my friend now :3" or something //dies//, also before anyone says it- even if Tessa was a teen in the flashbacks- romance is not exclusive to ADULTS, teens can love eachother without having sexual stuff involved. no she was not their MOTHER figure, she was their FRIEND who liked to fix robots for herself to not be alone in a house where her own parents literally chain her up as punishment. i dont even know why im arguing about this, people headcanon or make aus about characters NOT being dead all the time and if Tessa was alive for as long as J thought she was, Tessa would have been a perfectly fine adult either way. so counting this, yes shes canonically considered an adult when Cyn tries to imitate an adult humans body 🙄 makes as much sense as everything else i guess-
next ones i got is NorixYeva/Neva- Solverlilies- i just think theyre neat 😭😭😭 and once again, like everything else in this franchise- they are tragic yuris 😔 damn liam im finding a pattern over here 🤨 anyway, i like to think they either got closer in the lab experimentations or were already close when they were working as WDs in the campsite area for the humans. obviously canonically they were probably straight or just not into eachother romantically- [Nori either u have the worst taste men or Khan just fucking lost it after you died-] but also on the other handddd.... they have 2 hands and they are robots, i want them to kiss like two barbie dolls and im gonna make them do just that-
DollxLizzy/Dizzy- Bloodypink, wost fucking ship names ever, i cant find shit on them with these tags and it makes me angry >:/ at this point 2/3s of my ships are just tragic yuris smh, Doll did not deserve any of the things handed to her, even if she went about doing some things the wrong way i wish Lizzy didnt just abandon her- but then again, Doll did kinda abuse Lizzys trust and Lizzy got scared of being close to a serial murderer so.... morality calls this a draw? 😭 im crying... i wish someone was there to help Doll... sigh... i like to think Lizzy would have waited for Doll to just come back at some point... oh well, thats why AUs exist :"3 //sobs in the corner//
DollxUzi/Dollzi- Bloodybats, this ship is so underrated to me... they could have been... so much more. but why weren't they? did Yeva abandon ever getting close to Uzi when she was a kid after Nori died? did Uzi and Doll just never play around together as kids when their mothers were so close? were they ever close and something went wrong as they grew older? at worst they could have been like sisters together, and at best maybe more than friends. i just dont know what happened here, like Yeva could have tried to keep an eye on Uzi, maybe Uzi could have found Dolls powers so cool before having them too- i dont know theres literally tons of possibilities- but if Doll deserved to be saved or cared for by anyone, at least one of them should have been Uzi... sigh.
ThadxV- Killingblonde, yall this is... the cutest shit... ever???? like from here on out we kinda go into the more or less crackship territory but these two are adorable- Dumbass yet wholesome jock boy that just wants to keep his queen happy 😔👌👌👌 He and Uzi would have so much to talk about on "crushing on literal murder bots that stabbed and almost ate us" its literally love at first stab smhhh 😫💕
ThadxSam- Smokyjock ???? for some fucking reason??? i dont know what my brain did here man- i just like the trope of someone getting under Thads skin- like pair up the healthy sports loving gym boy with the lazy but wholesome dumbass that does drugs or is always just sleep deprived and Thad is always trying to just... take care of his ass and make him take care of himself but he just WONT SMHHH-
okay some more or less crack ships down here:
ThadxN: it speaks for itself. its too adorable and youll go blind from the light of wholesomeness-
ThadxNxUzi: Uzi will die here from the overwhelming wholesomeness... oh bonus if its just a 4s polycule of ThadxNxUzixV i mean i know im pushing my luck but.... random crackships go brr- V and Uzi will complain but love their dumbass golden puppy partners-
ThadxUzi: i think they could have been close and Thad caring about her as a childhood friend turned crush sounds just too cute for me 😔
LizzyxUzi: another random ass rivals to lovers or some shit idk what this is, Lizzy would pay Uzi to kiss the fuck out of her i dont make the rules-
ThadxLizzy: in some cases where they are NOT headcanoned as siblings or cousins, i think they have a good energy of wholesome jock bf and girly queen cheerleader lol, Thad is just a good bf eitherway-
DollxUzixLizzy: the gals would not leave a single second of silence for the small gremlin i swear to God- [Uzi is gay as FUCK for her gfs, absolute girloser unit with her gorgeous but crazy gfs]
okay for the end i have some characters that arent ships but i wish they could have become closer as friends or work out their issues...
J and N- too much abuse and toxicity here, i wish they could talk together more and see they have a lot of things in common- maybe a full line of dialogue from J without threatning N in every sense of the manner would be nice for a change =_=
Doll and V- again, a bit morally ambiguous to ship a character with the murderer of your family, esp when said murderer hasnt expressed regret lmao, but i wish they could at least be friends... Dolls disdain for the murder drones pushed her to end up the way she did. maybe if she didnt do it alone she would have been alive by now. so i like to think what would have happened if she and V could have made up- not necessarily Doll forgiving her- but at least having the space to grow and understand why they did they things that happened.
Cyn and literally ANYONE- i want the solver to be SEPARATE from Cyn- i wish Cyn would have still existed somewhere down there and was savable- i wish this poor child AI had a happy ending to her by connecting with the others as ACTUAL siblings... goddamnit 😔
aaaand thats it for this fine ass day 🫡 yall are welcome to ask about any of these- boy the tags are gonna be.... a lot.
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sunny1616 · 7 months
Text
Ready
Rafe Cameron x pregnant reader
Summary: You're about to give birth to your twin boys.
Warnings: pregnancy
"Rafe!! I think my water broke!!" You were on the phone with Rafe while in the kitchen getting a snack when all of a sudden you felt wetness down your legs. On the other end of the line you heard nothing but silence.
"WHAT NOW?!... Okay. Thats completely fine. Wooo. Oh my god its happening!!" Rafe was freaking out on the other end trying to gather himself so he could figure out what to do next.
"Rafe! Dont freak out. We both planned for this. Now, im going to-"
"Skrew the plans!!! Go sit on the couch. Stay on the line and wait for me to come home!!"
"Babe, don't worry my bag is packed and im fine. I was just going to clean myself up and change into something else. Then I'll wait for you. I'll see you soon. Just drive safely!"
"*pant* Yea. *pant* Okay. You're right. *pant* We got this. *deep breathe* hang tight for 15mins I'm coming."
"Haha yeah, we got this. Be careful! Bye!"
You end the call, then find some paper towels to toss on the wet spots on the ground. Then you go into your closet and attached master bathroom to clean up and then decide to take a quick shower since you have the time. You then put on some wideleg sweatpants and a comfy stretchy t-shirt on to go on top of your belly.
You are sitting on the floor with all your things packed in your bags for a few days in the hospital. You're doing your final checks when you hear Rafe come in behind you. You twist around to greet him, but he reaches you quick hugging you and rubbing your belly while giving multiple kisses on your temple. You hold onto his arms keeping yourself in his embrace.
"Hey baby, how are you doing? Im sorry I didn't get here sooner. Traffic was crazy. Have you already finished packin? Did you shower?!" From his surprised features, you can clearly tell that this is not going the way he thought.
"Yeah, haha. My contractions are only 15 minutes apart, and I've only had 2 so far, so i thought that i could time my shower in between. Then I just put my clothes on. Im just double-checking all this stuff, i already know we have everything. All that's left is your stuff, and you getting ready. Then heading to the hospital!! Im excited!! But also nervous, haha." You take his silence as shock and relief and how great your doing.
"I'm glad you're all ready to go. I guess ill just change and get this stuff in the car. You just relax, ill do the rest. We'll be in the hospital right away." He then meets your lips with a kiss and gets up and heads to the closet.
"You don't need to rush! Hospital protocal usually says that we should go in when contractions are only 5mins apart. So we still have time! You can shower if you want!"
"You're amazing, you know that? I still say we go before it reaches that point since you're having twins!" He then pops out of the closet after changing and then picks up the packed luggage and carries it downstairs.
"True true. But baby, where's your stuff? i couldn't find it in the closet?" You say loudly so he can hear you from downstairs.
"It's already in the car. I've had my hospital bag in there for a few days now. Don't come downstairs yet! I'll come get you!" You roll your eyes at that. But are so happy that everything is happening at a smooth pace. You then go to get up to find your sweater and Rafe gets back upstairs and is at the door.
"Ready?" He smiles at you.
"More than ever!" You give him the biggest grin.
He then leads you down the stairs, which you admit feels safer with his since you can barely see the steps under your belly.
Rafe then gets you into the shotgun seat of the car and gives you a kiss. He gets around to the other side and starts driving to the hospital. You have a contraction on a red light. But a few handsqeezes with Rafe and controlled breathing exercises get you through.
Once at the hospital reception desk. The nurse explains the paper work and gets you into a wheelchair and helps you to your room.
You then change into your delivery attire and are set into the bed with all the monitors and equipment. This is very real now.
The doctor comes every 2hrs and after 10hrs finally notifies you about your progression and tells you to start pushing.
"You're doing so good, sweetie. One more, you got this!" He's right there by your side giving holding your hand and the back of your neck. During a push, he helps you reach a deeper crunch by supporting your back.
After what feels like hours of pushing. You finally get the first baby out.
Authors note: should i do a pt2? Ive written past this point 3 times now but everytime i save, my progress keeps vanishing!😫 I'll only do it if anyone wants lol. Otherwise i hope you like it and thank you for reading! 💗
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the-s1lly-corner · 11 months
Note
I’ve read through some of your old posts and I gotta say…I love me some angst. May I kindly, pretty please with a plastic cherry on top, ask for TADC gang with an S/O who abstracted a while back, but then they ‘respawn’ one day with a glitch affect about them, and their memory was totally wiped? Like it was their first day in the digital world? The glitch affect doesn’t hurt them or anyone like what happened to Ragetha and Pomni btw.
TADC cast x mended!reader
so funny story i was about to sit down and work on this about 4 hours ago but then my parents said they were going to watch the fnaf movie in the garage and i literally dropped everything and watched it so uh uh. the reason the grind stopped was because of fnaf movie and now im kinda tempted to pick up my fnaf fic again anyways! i did a similar post, here! jax and caines parts here will be short, really only focusing on the glitch aspect for them in this post, since the other half has already been written!
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CAINE:
just got flashed with an image but you know that scene where the iron giant is trying to pick the boy up but hes like limp or something and the giant pulls back (ive never watched iron giant i just know this clip from a meme) i think it would be like that if he tried to poof your glitching away; but like. in an emotional way, if that makes sense. like its the same kind of carefulness and worry, i think... bonus if he does more damage than not
JAX:
honestly a little too scared to even touch you out of the deep seeded fear of getting all glitchy as well. like he knows it wont spread to him, but you know...
POMNI:
similar to jax i think she would instinctively avoid touching you even though she knows its fine... the whole hand thing making her overly cautious for future scenarios, you know? i think she would slip up and accidentally bring up something you and her did before you abstracted, or call you an endearing name before abruptly stopping herself and trailing off, sad stuff. grief makes her tear between wanting to find an exit faster and trying to make you remember/stay for you
RAGATHA:
poor girl :( i think she would genuinely try to make an effort to re/befriend you and try not to have her hopes too high for the two of you to get back together. if you hear about your past relationship and want to learn more about it, shell tell you what you want to know, but i doubt she would instantly start dating you again if you suggest the two of you trying to give the relationship a second shot... i think that would need some time
KINGER:
bro is gonna be going through it, first he loses his possible wife to abstraction and now he lost you.. got you back, but you dont remember anything. on top of that you look.. off.. sure it doesnt hurt you but it still looks like it would be uncomfortable, even if it isnt
stuck between longing to rekindle your old relationship and letting you go in order to allow himself to process this grief; the third option is potential abstraction for himself
ZOOBLE:
tries not to care. they want to forget everything like you did, they were finally starting to be normal after your abstraction. but now your back in a clean slate, mind wiped and memories gone. how does someone cope with that? as much as it hurts them they think it would be best for them to pretend you were a stranger again
GANGLE:
saying it again, poor girl. mix of pomni and ragatha here i think, like she keeps messing up and verbally reminiscing before realizing you cant relate to what shes saying anymore. will tell you anything you want to know about the past, but i think it would take a lot longer for her to consider getting with you again than ragatha. for both its kind of a "i dont want them to feel obligated to try because we were together once" type deal
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morganbritton132 · 1 year
Note
ahhhh i just spent the last three days reading every post on the emtts tag and im in love with your whole little universe. i kept meaning to make a list of all of the little things but i kept getting distracted and forgetting so i only started at april 18th bc i NEED (subject to your willingness to expand/care act this particular part of your universe) to hear more about all of the little stories of steve getting arrested (particularly hopper arresting steve?? and them breaking into steves parents house?)
thanks for this amazing space!! you’ve made a universe that ive been thinking about constantly and that expands on the characters in such a beautiful mundane way, its very cool!!
ps i just read one of the follow ups in the death threat part where steve admits he doesn’t want to stop teaching bc dustin asks eddie about it and i think im about to cry holy shit
pps on the death threat part with diane oh god. like just steve having to figure it out in front of her and her explaining to him and him admitting to just not being ok i just
First, thank you so much! This is all so very nice of you to say and props for getting through everything in three days. It is quite a bit! It’s honestly amazing how much has been written in such a short amount of time. I’m only going to cover Steve getting ‘arrested’ and I’ll touch on Steve and Eddie’s breaking and entering at a later date.
Steve started having seizures a little after they closed the gate on the Upside Down for good or, well. They started noticing that he was having seizures after they closed the gate. It was heavily implied in the undertone of his doctor’s voice that these seizures were likely going on for a while and that they likely not going to stop anytime soon.
Steve took this news as well as anybody could.
Everybody was kinda waiting for him to have a breakdown over it, but it never happened because Steve was – well, he wasn’t fine. Obviously. But it is what it is, right? If the worst thing to come out of all this Upside Down stuff is that he’s a little dumber than he was before than how could he complain?
Max was learning how to walk again.
What Steve didn’t take well was his doctor telling him that he wasn’t allowed to drive anymore. In fact, he did not take that news at all. He completely ignored it, and he ignored the looks that Robin when give him when he drove himself to work, and he would say, “It’s not like I’m driving the kids around or anything. It’s just me.”
“And that’s supposed to make me worry less?”
“I pull over if I feel weird.”
He wasn’t actually driving all that much anyways. Robin got her permit and Eddie got the all-clear to drive again, so no one needed to rope Nancy into lecturing him about ‘the dangers.’ He didn’t need Dustin’s complaining or Eddie’s ‘hey, maybe you should listen to them’ or Joyce stopping him on his way out the door. And he didn’t need Hopper.
Steve was learning to accept that sometimes he needed help. He was doing better, but Steve practically lived alone despite the jokes people were making about him being at Eddie’s all the time, and he wasn’t going to bother someone just because he needed toilet paper.
Steve was sitting in his car outside of the Fair Mart, trying to remember why he needed to go there in the first place, when there was a knock on his window. He startled and blinked hard twice before looking over at the drivers’ side window. He frowned.
Hopper was standing there and he looked annoyed. He gestured for him to get out of the car and Steve frowned more, fumbling with his seatbelt before pushing the door open. For lack of anything else to do once he was out of the car, Steve said, “Hey, what’s up?”
Hopper frowned more like he was annoyed with Steve which was, in itself, was really annoying because Steve didn’t do anything. He was just here to buy… He was here to get… Wait. “Huh?”
Hopper sighed loudly and repeated himself. Slowly. “Give me. Your keys.”
Maybe it was Hopper’s tone or maybe there was some stock in what his doctor said mood swings, or maybe Steve was just tired of everybody treating him like a baby that needed taken care of and watched. Just when Hopper reached to take the keys out of his hand, Steve shoved him away.
Everything kinda blurred at the edges and the headache that’s been wedged in the corner of Steve’s jaw pulsed. He didn’t really take a breath until Hopper shoved him against the hood of his car.
Hopper cuffed metal around his wrists and said, “Good going, Harrington.”
Steve yanked on his arm and snapped back, “You’re not even a cop anymore. You can’t arrest me.”
“Call it a citizen’s arrest.”
Eddie laughed for four minutes of Steve’s five minute phone call at the police station. He laughed so hard that Steve knew that he was holding his side where the bites were the deepest because they were still tender, and Steve just rolled his eyes, “Yeah, yeah. Yuck it up. Are you gonna get me?”
“Hm, yeah,” Eddie grinned through the phone. “Yeah. It’s a little ironic that the Prom K-“
Steve hung up the phone.
The ‘charges’ that Hopper (not a cop) threatened to ‘throw the book at him’ for were driving without a valid driver’s license. There was a part of Steve that knew that this was all just for show to teach him a lesson, but still argued that he had a valid license because no one took it away from him, and actually, “This is false imprisonment, right? Maybe I should call my family lawyer.”
It was even more annoying that Eddie – rolling into the building smelling like weed an hour later – agreed with Hopper. 
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l44serbeam · 1 year
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— TIRED OF YOU ʚɞ 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐞𝐞
← 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐭𝐰𝐨 | 𝐡𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐩𝐚𝐠𝐞
warnings — blood, gore, swearing, violence, disassociation, weapons
The second Ellie stepped foot out of Jackson to find y/n, she no linger had control of her body. She walked hours and killed dozens of infected and kept going with empty eyes. When she comes across a note leading her to y/ns whereabouts, she doesn’t hesitate to follow it. On the other hand, y/ns stumbling through her surrounds deliriously, helplessly trying to find supplies or anything to help keep her alive.
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“No! You’re cheating!” Y/n hissed, leaning over the table to smack Ellies hand.
“Im not cheating! You just suck at this game.” Ellie snickered, placing down another card.
“Its not a game of skill dumbass.” Y/n rolled her eyes, and placed down another card.
“Then your luck sucks.” Ellie replied before placing another card. “UNO!” The girl barked, her voice coming out more eager than warranted and jumping in her seat.
“YOU BITCH!” Y/n yelled, laughing with skepticism laced into her voice.
“C’mon y/n/n. You know what you gotta do.” Ellie said, her tone jokingly condescending.
“Fuck you.” Y/n said as she placed the only usable card she had.
Ellie didn’t spare a second to slap down her final card, jumping up and raising her arms in the air and laughing hysterically.
Y/n laughed as she watched Ellies antics, at that time being her best friend of a year and a half.
Three gentle knocks on the door made the two stop for a second, the door opening to reveal Joel.
“Whats going on in here? I can hear you from the porch.” He said but not in a chastising manner.
“Ellie being a cheater is what.” Y/n said as she grabbed the Uno cards and began shuffling them.
“Am not!” Ellie squeaked. “Shes just mad shes shit at every card game ever.”
Y/n rolled her eyes and flipped off the girl before her, igniting a hyena kind laughter from her.
“I think this games gonna fuel a rivalry.” Joel chuckled slightly. “Y/n, Maria is asking for you to talk about some job for tomorrow.”
“Shit.” Y/n cursed under her breath. “Yeah let me grab my stuff and ill go to her.”
Joel nodded and closed the door.
“What job for tomorrow?” Ellie asked, squinting her eyes at y/n suspiciously.
“Shes making me pick up some grunt work. Says itll help me ‘find peace’ and ‘distract myself’.” She said, saying the reasons in mocking voices.
“The fuck. You’ve been having shitty jobs for like weeks now. Thats not fair no one else our age is doing those jobs why do you have to?” Ellie began, starting to get riled up to what in her eyes was unfair.
“Its fine Els i don’t mind. Not like I have anything else to do. I like being busy.” Y/n reasoned, shrugging off Ellies worries.
“You’re going to get burn out quickly y/n if you’re doing this shit every day.”
Y/n turned around to face Ellie and crossed her arms and looked at the gurl with round eyes. “Ellie im fine. Ill be fine. If i get burnt out then i rest but i enjoy this. I get to go into the forest around us and it’s peaceful.”
“I still don’t think you should let them make you do these things y/n. I don’t want to see something happen to you.”
“Ill be ok Ellie. If anything happens to be ill beat up whoever made it happen.”
Ellie laughed and looked at her best friend, her fave soft and eyes happy. The sun that shone against her back casted an aura of gold around her head and hair. Ellie couldn’t identify the pitting feeling in her stomach, but it was there, swallowing in on herself.
“I dont doubt it y/n/n.”
The night was hollow and bloody, Ellie crouched over a lazily burning fire. She looked into it, her eyes empty and glazed.
It’d been over 48 hours since Ellie had left Jackson.
Shed walked and shed walked. She checked every building shed come across, killing dozens of infected along the way.
After almost a day of walking, shed finally reached the warehouse that Luke had marked on the map, anxiousness and excitement picking at her chest as she looked at the rusted building.
Shed desperate begged whatever was above to find her. To walk into that factory and the only attack shed receive was y/n’s warm embrace.
But, Ellie knew her life had a habit of not going the way she wished.
Searching through the factory, she found dozens of dead infected littering the floor, the blood pooling around them still shimmering against her flashlight. It hadn’t been ling since they were put down. She inspected their wounds, the majority having stab wounds instead of gunshots.
She knew. She knew that y/n was the one to do this. That her y/n, pained and hungry had killed dozens of these infected in a fight to save her life.
This conclusion Ellie had come to was only solidified when she came across an opened closet in the first floor, blood staining the ground of it. But what caught Ellies attention wasn’t the blood of the ruthless scratches carved into the door. It was the arrow sticking out the wall by the door, pinning a polaroid onto the wall. It was simply a picture of the forest, green blooming everywhere and the suns rays reflecting off the leaves.
Ellie knew this was y/ns way of telling the girl she was alive.
With hope prickling at her ears, Ellie took the arrow and polaroid and went off to try to track her.
Now, the day later, Ellie had set up a fire to warm herself before she kept on her search, her feet aching in pain and her arms burning.
She didnt care how long shed have to be out there, she knew she had to find her. She couldn’t bare knowing that the last time the two interacted was an argument where she’d said things she couldn’t even think of repeating.
When Ellie pulled off the arrow, not one, but two polaroids fell, another one hidden behind.
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The e’s. The handwriting only confirmed the polaroids and arrows belonging to y/n.
Staring down at the miswritten e’s and scratchy writing, Ellies eyes solidified as she breathed in deeply.
She stuffed it into the pocket and exited the warehouse, searching for the sign that was referenced in the note.
After walking around the perimeter, Ellie found a path that went downwards and led to the near by deserted town below the elevated land. Next to the beginning of the path was a big yellow metal sign with a black arrow pointing down the path.
Ellie straightened her back and breathed in, flicking open her pocket knife in a smooth action and holding it readily at her side. She began lunging down the path, alerted and ready to get through anything and anyone.
Step after step, breath after breath, y/n stumbled into the beginning of the town, seemingly unbothered and unclaimed.
Her head was faint and hazey, the plentiful blood that had rolled down her legs had practically dried onto her skin and muddy sweat beaded at her neck.
For the past 24 hours, y/n had been painfully taking down infected. Her lack of supplies left her clutching onto holding reality.
The burning sun beamed down on her for hours, evaporating basically all the water from her body, but no where was there any replenishment for that loss of water. Her fatigue weighed down on her and the empty grovel of her stomach made her fragiler.
A pharmacy.
Y/n felt the world around her sharpen when spotting the weathered words on the wall of the building before her, reading 24 HOUR PHARMACY.
She peered in through the windows as best as she could before losing her sense of control and pushing her way inside.
She looked around desperately, the place obviously not exactly flourishing with left behind items.
“Bingo.” y/n whispered upon finding a few supplies hidden behind the checking counter.
A bottle of alcohol, a few rags, and a protein bar. Desperately she collapsed to the ground to claw at the supplies, ripping the cap off the alcohol and pouring it on a rag. She leaned to her leg and hesitantly held the cloth over the wound on her leg.
Taking a few shaky breaths as she prepared herself of the torturous burn she was going to feel.
3… 2… 1…
Hot, red, flashing pain shot through y/ns body, her moth hissing and head hitting the counter behind her. “Jesus fucking christ.” She groaned, reaching over to the protein bar as her other hand held the rag. She ripped it open with her teeth and ravished the thing, the chocolate flavor blessing her dry, swollen tongue.
But what is it that they say, all food tastes amazing when you’re starving, right?
“Ok boys lets do this quickly!”
The hairs on the back of y/ns neck immediately stood and the fog in her brain subsided.
“Groups of two, alright? Leo and Nick with me, rest go. Kill anything and anyone you come across.” The voice of the yelled from outside the pharmacy, close enough to a broke glass that y/n could clearly hear their conversation.
Her hand desperately clawed at the ground around her is search of the knife shed had all along. Once grabbed, she pulled it against her chest, arm at ready for any sudden action.
Then, the sudden noise of the ring of the pharmacy door opening, followed by the shuffling of feet.
“Look ‘round. See what you can scrounge up.” A dark, rough voice ordered from the door.
Y/ns grip on her knife tightened and her breathing settled.
Go.
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@lady-curpse @depressionandobsessionsessi-blog @muthafuckingstargirl @slut4vampire @evangelinejxy @lanasluverr @galacticstxrdust @lazyotakuofficial @agalswrittingobsession @dania7361 @jolieetoile @star-j0 @macaroni676 @gocryariver @a-beee @elliewilliamsissobabygirl @daddysfavoritesexkitten @dergy @dakota-dream @hangel0veb0t @randomhoex @l0v3e1i @stvrl1ght333 @ilovemydinoboi @bertandfearnie @luvwanda @hotgirlsshareaccounts @boobabietch @lazyotakuofficial @imaginexred @miadean
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a/n — the way this is a day late and i havent posted the robin fic i was supposed to a few days ago😭😭 im so sorry yall this week has been CRAZY. i went to my first ever pride this weekend and got fuuuuucked up, i saw a few friends of mine perform (but it was a monday night and felt the consequences of my actions the next morning), i bought my first car ever by myself 🥳🥳🥳(finally a bitch can get out of the public transportation shes been trained to use since she was like 10💀), and i did an interview for a new job im trying to get and it went surprisingly well. these next few days ill b posting a bunch of stuff ti make up for my delays so i hope u enjoyyy.
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nokiatelava · 11 months
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✿✿Orange Moon✿✿
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♡✧.·:*¨༺✪⍟✪༻¨*:·.✧♡
Author’s Note - HEHEHEHAHAHA! HI YALL!! I feel like im on a literal rollll, i started writing this RIGHT AFTER Moonlight! But this is like a part three-ish to this little Awpxey series!!! If you guys want anything more to do with him girl don’t be shy to hit up my inboxxx! I actually have to check if it even works but regardless! Enjoy this please!
♡✧.·:*¨༺✪⍟✪༻¨*:·.✧♡
Summary - It is now early in the morning, the morning after you had snuck out. You are now stuck in between how to explain to your parents why you had left and never returned, and why you now have a boy with you, courting you, following you 24/7, and asking for your family’s blessing!
♡✧.·:*¨༺✪⍟✪༻¨*:·.✧♡
Warnings - nothing to crazy?, cuddling, kissing, teen romance, fluffy stuff, courting, relationship establishments, very worried parents, worried family, parent talk, jake still coming to terms reader’s growing up, mentions of mating, boyfriend vs family tension, happy family moments, family dinner, meeting parents (yes already), overprotective family
༺。° .ᘛ𓆩♡𓆪ᘚ. ° 。༻
A sudden loud chirp was what had woken you up from your peaceful slumber. Your ears folding down in a slight annoyance as you were so groggy.
You sighed tiredly, your nose stuffy and congested from your sleep. Your body felt so warm, you thought it was from the atmosphere of the cave.
Until, you felt the cool breath of someone from behind you.
You froze.
Who is that?
You had felt relieved once you remembered it was just Awpxey.
What left that relief short lived was the fact you had fallen asleep here, in this cave, all through the night, with Awpxey, exchanging kisses throughout the night, and you still haven’t said a thing to your parents. I mean how were you supposed to talk to them?
You were not home. And you were not going to wake them up in the middle of the night over the fact you couldn’t sleep.
But now you wish you had left some type of note. You were scared to return home. Gosh your parents are not going to be happy.
You knew that as soon as you walk through that hut entrance, your ass is as good as grass.
You’re done for. You’re gonna be on the worst punishments ever. This would be your first and very last time sneaking out.
If you even make it out of this, alive.
Awpxey’s head stirring had brought you back to reality, a deep sigh coming from his stuffy nose too.
You had stood up abruptly, your back weirdly warm due to his chest. But that was the last thing on your mind.
Guilt set in your stomach as you seen how he jerked due to your quick removal. He sat up, rubbing his eyes as he was trying to look at you but rub that itch out his eyes.
“Y/n?” Oh god… His morning voice was beyond fine.
“A-Awpxey… We-uhm, we fell asleep here. I have to get home, and I’m probably gonna be in trouble.” You ramble on nervously. When you looked down towards him to see why he was so quiet you found him already looking at you, a soft smile adorning his lips.
Awpxey proposed his idea. “Why don’t we go wash up first? Then I’ll walk you to your hut, and say it’s my fault you left and never went back in the first please, yeah?”
“No. No, that’s not fair for you to just take the blame lime that. I cant do that to you.”
“I’m doing it to myself, actually.”
Gosh when did everybody just start becoming such smartasses?
“Okay then, smartass. Since you know everything, fine then. You can do whatever you want. I don’t care.” You grumbled as you crossed your arms over your chest.
He smiled at you teasingly from the floor before standing and stretching. A yawn spread across your mouth as you heard his back crack.
You were caught off guard when Awpxey was just then in front of you, and pecked your lips.
You covered your mouth with both your hands in shock. His name coming muffled from behind your hands.
He stared at you confused, his head tilted as the skin of his eyebrow was raised on one side.
“You kissed me before I even washed my mouth!” You exclaim, your shock seemed so foreign to him, why was it so important.
Your mood felt more sour once you heard that familiar laugh. He was laughing at you, in your face. His head thrown pack with one hand slapped over his stomach kind of laugh.
“Boys are unsalvageable.” You mutter the comment to yourself, or at least it was supposed to be to yourself. In your daze of being annoyed at the fact Awpxey laughed at you, you didn’t notice when he had stopped.
Hands were suddenly around your waist from your front, scaring you. And there Awpxey was standing in all his glory, his tall stature hanging over you.
“What’s that supposed to mean, sevin?” You eyes widen at the question, and at the fact he had called you pretty.
There wasn’t must time to dwell on it before he smashed his lips against yours. His hands gently holding your waist, giving it four small squeezes.
Your hands soon moved up towards his shoulders, your arms wrapping behind his neck, deepening the kiss.
The kiss lasted for almost a good minute, before you realized neither of you had washed your mouths.
“Awpxey! That’s the second time!” You jump back after you separate from the kiss.
“What are you, a germaphobe or something?” He asked mockingly while rolling his eyes. You turned back to glare at him while you exited the cave.
You were glad there was a river close to where the cave was located as you submerged yourself knee-deep into the cool water.
It helped cool down your hot skin, so you had given in to your urge and went completely underwater.
The cold water enveloped you, your hair, your clothes, your jewelry, your whole body.
When you resurfaced, a small pant evident in your chest, you turned around to see Awpxey around shoulder deep into the water.
You swam towards him, catching his attention quick. A smile on both of your faces.
“Have you washed your mouth?” He asked matter-of-factly. And you responded just the same.
“Yes I have, have you?” You were expectant for his answer as what you wanted to say was on the tip of your tongue.
“I sure did.” He said with so much confidence.
“Hard to believe…” You mutter out purposely, hoping to get under his skin. Which you had.
“What did you say?” He leaned forward to you, turning his head to point his ear at you.
You placed your mouth right in front of his ear, speaking decibels louder. “Hard to believe.”
Awpxey moved back, shock on his face. “I’m offended Y/n.” He placed his hand on his chest.
“That’s okay.” You shrugged, a smile breaking out on your face.
“You’re so mean to me, makes me wanna kiss you.” You froze at his words.
“What?” You say blindly, shock written all over you.
“You heard me. Didn’t you?” He wasn’t be serious was he? He’s just trying to bother you for bothering him that’s all.
Yeah. That’s all.
But it wasn’t when he put his index finger under your chin, lifting your head so you look back up to his face.
“I said I wanna kiss you. Can I?”
You were speechless. Not really knowing what to say back to him, but you blindly nodded anyways.
“Can I hear you say it? I gotta know you’re functioning Y/n.”
Oh Eywa.
Somebody needs to come get this man.
“F-fine. You can kiss me.” You grumbled.
“Good.” Awpxey said with a smile.
His lips then connected with yours, his hands holding the sides of your face gently as the kiss deepened.
Your hands held onto his biceps, your legs felt weak under the water. His arms were working as your extra support.
You have never felt anything more intimate in your whole life.
This is what true love felt like.
This must be what your parents feel like, your grandparents. Your grandfather who you were never able to meet.
And the many generations before that. They had all felt true love. They all had their own intimate moments such as this. You’re experiencing that moment, right now.
“Awpxey.” You said breathlessly. He felt this way too right?
“Y/n.” His voice was so soft, it was smooth and sultry. A tone like no other.
“I want to ask you something, Y/n. If you don’t have a problem with that.”
You nodded, “it’s fine Awpxey, you can ask me.”
“Come,” he beckoned, “I want to ask you while sitting down somewhere.”
You nodded, following him out the water. You watched starstruck as water cascaded down his back. Going through and then out of the crevices and dips from his muscles.
Eywa took her time on him.
Before you knew it you were sat on a patch of grass not far from the river, Awpxey next to you.
“What was it you wanted to ask me Awpxey?” You didn’t want to rush him, your parents the last thing on your mind right now.
He took a deep breath, settling his nerves before he spoke.
“I want to start courting you.”
You did everything to stay still and to just look and listen so your body language didn’t send any of the wrong signs.
You gave a small smile and a nod as you noticed he had more to say.
Awpxey turned more towards you, grabbing your hand. Fidgeting with your fingers and the rings you wore, along with your bracelets.
“This is why I want to court you.” He starts.
“You read me so well, you read everybody so well. You notice the little things and always want to help!” You nod, letting him know that he has your full attention and that you’re listening to him.
“You’re so sweet, and kind, and beautiful. You can make anybody happy. You light up rooms when you walk in and your smile brightens everyone’s day. The elders love you since you are so kind. You’re humble! And they love that, I know I do.” You laugh at his small comment, trying not to cry at his sweet words.
“And the children.. The classes that you teach you can hear them when they talk to their parents, just raving about just how amazing you are, and how you’re so interactive and I just love you.” Your eyes widen.
“I love you. And I want to show it by courting you. So, I am asking for your permission. Y/n te Sulli Neytiri’ite, may I, Awpxey te Relongtai Puo’itan, court you?”
Your eyes well with tears. His words were so heartfelt. No one had ever said they loved you but your own family. To hear it from somebody else in that way caused this feeling in your chest that was so foreign and unexplainable you didn’t know what to do.
But you did know that you loved him, you loved Awpxey. So you nodded. You nodded accepting his request to court you.
“Y-Yes Awpxey. You can court me.” You wiped your tears as you laughed, feeling a bit embarrassed at your reaction.
He tackled you into a hug. Holding you tightly before his whispered a small ‘thank you’ into your ear.
“Does that mean we’re boyfriend and girlfriend now?” You asked into his shoulder.
“I guess so, but that’s only if you want to.”
“Then I guess we’re boyfriend and girlfriend.”
You both laid there, together. Enjoying your moment, until your eyes widened, realizing that you are still out here and your family has no idea where you are.
“Oh my god Awpxey!” You exclaimed, rushing to get up.
“What? What happened?” He got up just as frantically as you had.
“I have to go home! I haven’t went home, oh my god! Awpxey I’m gonna be in so much trouble! Oh my gosh, oh my gosh.”
Awpxey was quick to be at your side, holding your shoulders to calm you down.
“It’s gonna be okay. Everything’s gonna be okay, okay? Like I said earlier, I’ll take the blame. I’ll say it was apart of my plan when I was asking to court you, alright?”
You shook your head, “I can’t allow you to get in trouble like that! I’m not doing that to you!”
You were refusing, you know how your parents could get, you did not need the only man who had shown you true love and interest in you, to be chased away by your parents who are borderline-psychotic.
“Please Awpxey, I can’t lose you.” Your eyes had gotten teary again. And that’s when Awpxey realized how serious this was to you.
“Okay Y/n, okay. We’ll figure something out, I promise.” Awpxey pulled you to his chest, brushing your hair back from your face.
“I’m just gonna tell the truth… My mother always told me that the truth sets you free, so I’m gonna say what really happened.” You were dead set on not letting Awpxey lie for you. And he could see that, so he nodded, not wanting to upset you further.
“If that’s what you wanna do Y/n, you can do that. You know your family better than I do, you know their morals and what they believe.” Awpxey still held you, his chin resting on your head.
“We should go now…” You whispered meekly. “Go and get it over with.” There was an apology at the tip of your tongue. But you wanted to hold it, just in case you might really need to say it later.
“Okay, let’s go Y/n.” Awpxey held your hand the whole way. He talked to you and helped you take your mind off things for quite a bit.
You then realized that you were at the point where you would need your ikran to go back to High Camp.
“Awpxey, we need our Ikran now.. To go back.” You had gotten sad at even the thought of returning. You were scared to see how your parents would react.
Awpxey agreed, and had noticed your hesitation, so he placed his hand on your shoulder, rubbing it gently.
When you both had finished calling your ikran, and they had both arrived, you mounted them. Riding back to your home located in the Hallelujah Mountains.
Once you were there, and had landed your ikran, the amount of anxiety and trepidation inside your stomach was unreal.
As you two walked close to where your hut was you had stopped, shaking your head.
“Y/n? What’s wrong?”
“I can’t go in there Awpxey. I can’t go in there. They’re going to be so mad at me, so disappointed I can’t do this. I can’t, I really can’t.” You rambled out, your breath shortening as you panted.
“Y/n. Y/n, you need to focus. Okay? Look at me. Y/n look at me please.” Your eyes flickered to his. “You can do this, okay? Don’t ever say you can’t. Got it?”
“G-got it.” You nodded. “I-I’m going to go now, I want you to stay out here though Awpxey. I don’t.. I don’t want them to act different if you’re in there, okay?”
He nodded immediately, understanding your situation. “I got it Y/n. If anything, absolutely anything happens, come look for me. I’ll most likely be in my hut with my parents, okay?” You smiled.
“Okay Awpxey.” You hugged him, hugged him tight to savor his body warmth because you had no idea if that was going to be your last time seeing him.
“You’re going to be okay Y/n, go. I promise.” Yo nodded, waving goodbye to him before walking towards your hut.
You walked slow, your footsteps light as to not aware anybody in the hut.
When you had finally approached the entrance, walking through it slowly, your chest heavy and your mind hazy you stopped.
All heads turned to you quickly, your parents the first to stand. They rushed towards you, both exclaiming, “Y/n!” As they ran.
Your father grabbed you, turning you around and examining your body for any injuries, he had obviously, found none.
Your mother held your hand, pulling your head to her chest as she cried tears of joy at the fact you had come home, safe, and with no injuries.
“Where have you been ma’ite? We were all so worried for you!”
“I-I’m okay mom, I swear. This is a really, really big misunderstanding.” You held your hands out.
“Misunderstanding?” You dad echoed.
“Yes, misunderstanding. I want to explain you guys what happened first before you ask me anything though, okay?” Your parents nodded, they had beckoned your siblings out, though they protested as they wanted to see you too.
Your parents gave them the promise that they will see you later.
Awpxey watched from afar as he seen all your siblings walk out the hut, incoherent protests leaving their mouths.
‘Shit.’
Once they were all gone, and your father checked the area to see that they were really gone, you all sat at the table.
As your parents faced you, you fidgeted with your jewelry, scared to even look them in the face.
“Ma’ite? What happened? Why were you gone for so long?” Your mother asked. That’s when you finally looked up.
“I-It’s a little bit of a long story? I’m going to explain everything though.” Your father nodded, giving you his undivided attention.
“Last night, I could not fall asleep.” Your parents began to nod along to your story.
“So, I decided that I would go to the forest, to get my mind off of things.” You internally cringed as you seen your fathers eyes widen.
“I know, I know that it was really, really dangerous to leave with out saying anything and with the fact Sky People are here, I know. I hesitated at first. I was scared to even go. But I followed my gut. I think it was the best decision I ever made actually.” You said with a sheepish smile after your last sentence.
Your parents’ brows furrowed as they shared a look between each other.
“Anyway, while I was out there, about to bother the fan lizards, I had found Awpxey.” The name felt heavy on your tongue, worried about how your father would feel before anybody else.
“We hung out, and then he took me to this really pretty cave that had an open top so we watched the stars.” Your cheeks felt warm as you knew you were leaving some details out.
“We watched the stars and then fell asleep after a while, and when we woke up we washed at the river then came here.” You felt bad for worrying your parents, but at the same time you are so, so glad you left.
“Nothing like that happened either, dad. We only hung out, talked and stargazed. That’s it.” Toy father put his hands up.
“I-I never said anything.” He already looked so guilty, but you know you had put him on the spot.
“I know how you are, I just want to say it to clear any thoughts.”
After about 10 seconds you noticed your mother’s ongoing silence. You peeked up at her nervously, wondering why she hadn’t said anything.
You were shocked to see she had a smile on her face. Did she know?
“I’m glad it was only positive stuff that happened ma’ite, is there anything else you want to say?”
You choked as you remembered the fact Awpxey is now courting you.
“Babygirl?” Your dad asked.
“Uhm.. Yeah. One more thing..” You let out a nervous chuckle.
“Awpxeyaskedtocourtmesoweretechnicallykindofdatingnow!” You rushed out in one breath.
“What?” Your parents said simultaneously.
You took a deep breath. “Awpxey asked to court me. So.. We’re technically kind of dating now…”
Your eyes were shut. And you wanted to keep it that way.
You peeked through one squinted eyelid, just to see your mother holding your fathers head.
Your body slumped in as you stared on in disbelief.
“Sh, sh, sh, it’s okay ma’jake. It’s okay.” Your mother patted his head.
“Wha- Mom. What is even happening right now?” You jumbled out.
You then heard a hiccup. A deep one.
Is your father crying?
“Dad?” You asked worriedly.
When his head lifted to face towards you your heart broke. You had never seen your father cry in your 17 years of living. So to see his tearful face and swollen eyes, knowing you were the reason broke you.
“Dad.” Your eyes watered, hands clenching into fists at your side to try and hold them back.
“Oh babygirl, come here.” You both hugged, he held you close to him, and you cried into his shoulder. Happy to feel the familiar parental love and warm body that used to hold you when you were young.
The sensation had felt so far away at this point. It was heartwarming to feel it again.
Feel it as if you were little all over again.
“I’m sorry dad.” You didn’t know what exactly you were apologizing for, whether it was for making him cry, dating Awpxey or both. But regardless, you knew you had to apologize.
Your mother looked at you both with a smile on her face, an idea flashing in her head.
“You should invite him for dinner.” You and your father turned to look at your mother quickly. Both talking out at the same time.
“No!”
“Really?”
You look to your father quickly, trying to catch his eye as he avoided looking at you.
“I mean, uh. Yeah, uhm yeah. H-he should come for dinner, yeah.”
Your mother came forward, patting Jake on his shoulder. “You’ll be fine ma’Jake. I think it would be nice, think about it. We can see what he’s really like.”
You nodded, “please dad? He’s super nice, and respectful! He’s like a family man.” You had made sure to add the last comment because you knew it would win your dad over.
You could see the cogs in his brain working as he actually thought about it.
“Hmm.. Okay, okay fine he can come over for dinner.”
You jumped into his arms, knocking him onto his butt on the floor. “Thank you! Thank you, thank you! Thank you dad! I love you!” You kissed his cheeks and hugged him, he smiled as he hugged you back.
“You’re welcome, and I love you too babygirl.”
“Now go, go get him for dinner. Because I will start preparing it soon.” Your mother shooed you, and you left hastily with a new excitement as she was pulling you out the hut.
You walked around for a bit, looking for Awpxey’s hut when you finally noticed his father, Puo outside, hanging loincloths to dry.
You walk up to him speaking quietly as to not abruptly disturb him. “Excuse me, Mr. Relongtai?” He turned around at the call of his name.
“Oh, Y/n. Oel Ngati Kameie.” He said, doing the hand sign’s greeting. “Oel Ngati Kameie.” You greet back.
“What brings you here Y/n?” He asked.
So Awpxey hasn’t said anything to his parents. Good, that’s good. For right now at least.
“I was wondering if I could borrow Awpxey for dinner? My, uhm, my parents invited him over for dinner.” Puo had smiled at you.
“That’s fine with me! I’ll pack him a plate to take so he doesn’t go over there empty handed! Just go look for him inside and tell him to get presentable. Don’t need my son to look ugly if I’m handsome.” He mutters his last sentence sarcastically, chuckling at his own joke.
“If I’m being honest, he has your looks!” You gave a kind smile.
Puo paused, “really?” He asked, patting his cheeks. He smiled before running into the hut, yelling, “Itxä! Itxä! Y/n said Awpxey has my looks! That means I look young right?”
You peeked into the hut, seeing Puo kneeling next to Itxä who was re-braiding her hair.
“Puo! Get away from me! Go hang the clothes like I told you!” She was nudging him away with her elbow, still skillfully braiding her hair.
“But Itxä, you don’t think I’m handsome?” Puo asked with a frown.
“I mean, sometimes. It deducts points when you drool, you know unless-” She was cut off by Puo.
“Okay! Thanks by honey see you later!” He rushed back out the hut.
You finally noticed Awpxey in the corner, cringing at his mother’s innuendo.
“Mom really? Unless? Unless what? You know, don’t even answer I’m okay.” You giggled, a hand covering your mouth.
That had caught Itxä and Awpxey’s attention. Awpxey stood with a smile once he saw you.
“Y/n. Are you okay? Did everything go good?” He approached you, a nervous look in his eye.
You nodded happily, “yeah, everything went good. Really good actually. They want you to come over for dinner.”
Awpxey’s eyes widened. They wanted him to come over?
“R-really?” He was shocked, very shocked.
“Mhm! And I’m sure it’s with good intention! My mother proposed the idea and my father even agreed!” You fiddled with a bracelet on your arm.
“Mrs. Relongtai, is it okay if Awpxey comes over for dinner at my house?” You ask, knowing it would be rude to not even acknowledge her.
“Yes please, don’t even ask! It’s good he goes out. Or just gets out.” She adds quietly.
“What? Mom!” He turned to her, her head facing the wall to not look at him.
“What? I didn’t say anything!” She rolled her eyes. “Make sure you take a plate of food to offer to the Sully’s! Don’t even think you’re going over there empty handed slugging your shoulders.” You laughed, covering your mouth as it accidentally came out to loud.
“Y/n? You’re laughing too?” You placed your hand on his chest, still covering your mouth, shaking your head.
“No, no I was just, uhm..” You mumbled from behind your hand as you tried to think of an excuse.
“You’re hurting my heart Y/n.” Awpxey said walking away, going and packing a plate of what his parents had made for dinner.
“You’ll be fine, and make sure you tell the Sully’s I said hello, Awpxey!” Itxä called from the floor.
“I will, bye mom, love you!” Awpxey said as he started to leave the hut, you in tow.
“Bye, love you too!” She called back. As you walked by his father, he also said his farewells.
“Bye dad, love you.” He said as he intertwined his fingers with yours.
“Bye Awpxey, see you later, correct?” His dad teased. Awpxey pursed his lips in embarrassment.
“Yeah dad see you later.” Awpxey grumbled.
“See you son, love you.” Puo said before turning back around, continuing to hang up clothing items and other pieces.
“Love you too.” Awpxey then pulled you a long with him, walking to your hut.
“Awpxey?” You call for him.
“Hm?” He hums back in response.
“How do you know where I live?” You genuinely question. You weren’t trying to press him on anything personal, you just wanted to know.
“Y/n..” He says, his face was almost in a form of shock. “What?” You respond confused.
“Almost like everybody knows where you live… You’re a royal Y/n, even then, everybody knows where everybody lives. And your hut gets a bit rowdy with your siblings. Though it’s definitely not the biggest household.” You nodded in agreement at his last comment, you always wonder how the Ipexti Family is doing.
And wonder how they even managed 14 kids.
“Yeah that makes a lot of sense. I’m sure my brother kind of just lets everybody know doesn’t he?” You said with a small laugh.
You didn’t notice it, but Awpxey stared at you, looking at your smile, and all the features on your face.
Eywa took her time on her.
He had thought, he shook his head continuing to walk towards your house.
As you got closer, you slowed as you noticed your brother, Lo’ak, standing in the entrance of the hut. His arms crossed over his chest and his foot tapping impatiently on the ground.
“Oh God…” You mumbled as you seen him.
“Is that Lo’ak?” Awpxey asked, his eyes squinting as he smiled.
“Oh my God. Just walk by or something, cover your face so he doesn’t see us.” You muttered as you placed a hand to cover the side of your face.
“Y/n!” A voice suddenly yelled out. You did not turn your head as you knew exactly who it was.
“Y/n Sully!” Lo’ak continued to yell.
Now you see why everyone knows where you live.
You walked even slower towards your home. Awpxey laughed, seeing how you felt embarrassed.
Once you were finally near the entrance, you had noticed Neteyam stand up from the table and stand behind Lo’ak. Once you were in front of Lo’ak, he squinted his eyes to Awpxey.
“And who are you?” Lo’ak sneered at him.
“Lo’ak!” But your call had fallen on deaf ears.
Awpxey opened his mouth to answer, but was silenced when a hand rose up towards his face.
“Save it. I want to know what you’re doing with my sister. And why you’re here, holding her hand.” Lo’ak poked his chest, his eyes trained  solely on Awpxey.
“Lo’ak.” You let out a low warning, Neteyam seemed to notice how serious you gotten. So he reached forward and placed a hand gently around Lo’ak’s elbow.
Awpxey raised his hands in surrender, balancing the covered plate of food in his other.
“I come in no harm. I’m here with your sister for this dinner and to meet your family.” Awpxey explained.
“Meet us for what? Are you trying to mate her?” Lo’ak jabbed his finger back into Awpxey’s chest, and his eyes widened at Lo’aks question, not even the gesture.
That’s when Neteyam pulled Lo’ak back by his elbow, turning him around and pushing him into the hut.
“That’s enough.” He said to Lo’ak, still gripping onto his arm. Lo’ak pulled his arm back, walking to the table and sitting down.
“I apologize for his behavior, he doesn’t usually act like this.” Neteyam said, facing Awpxey with an apologetic smile.
“That’s alright, I can see why he’s upset.” Awpxey smiled.
When Neteyam had finally looked away, you turned to Awpxey, “I’m sorry about him. Don’t let him make you upset he does that to everybody really.”
Awpxey laughed, “it’s okay Y/n, I really don’t have have a problem with it.” He said with a smile.
You nodded, giving a nervous smile back. When you faced back towards the hut, grabbing his hand gently. You were shocked to see how everyone in the hut had a stiff face.
Your mother and father included.
What happened to the happy go lucky moods they had earlier when they told you to invite him?
You sighed, already feeling defeated in some way.
You just hoped he didn’t want to leave you.
Approaching the table, you sat in your usual spot, making sure that there was enough space for Awpxey before looking at everyone.
No one was batting an eyelash at you, everyone was looking at Awpxey. Their faces serious. It shocking to you to see even Tuk staring at him with her face hard from next to you.
She grabbed onto your arm, hugging herself around it and resting her head in your bicep, your hand instinctively coming to the top of her head.
You couldn’t see it, but Tuk smiled to the other side of the table. To your siblings that sat on the other side, expectant.
They must have not taken the news of you bringing a boy home too kindly.
The tension in the air was so thick, and you could see it was working Awpxey’s nerves as he rubbed his hands up and down his thighs.
Though he was the first to break the silence, “I brought a plate of fwampop, I helped my mother make it for dinner. I don’t know if any of you like that, so I apologize if you don’t. I’m sure it should still be warm.” He pulled the wrapping off the top of the plate, showing the seasoned meat, steam elevating as the barrier was released.
“Fwampop is fine.” It was Kiri’s voice who cut into the air next. You noticed her posture and realized how intimidating she actually looked. Her arms crossed over her chest as she looked at Awpxey, the usual warm expression she wears, gone.
“Yeah, thank you.” Tuk said as she leaned forward, making sure to be in his line of sight as her tone wasn’t the most, welcoming.
Your mother gave an expectant look towards your brothers, making them flicker their eyes to each other before looking back at Awpxey.
“Thank you.” It wasn’t exactly rude, but it wasn’t nice either. You’ve never heard them sound so passive aggressive.
“It was very nice of you to bring us something, Awpxey.” Your mother broke her characteristic silence, her voice calming and comforting as she nodded her head Awpxey.
“Now, how about we eat, yeah?” Your dad asked, placing his hand around Neytiri’s waist, pulling her closer.
You all hummed and nodded in agreement.
When you all began to serve yourselves, saying a quick prayer before eating, you took the time to look around. Seeing that the atmosphere had lightened up somewhat, they were making their own conversations. In their own little worlds.
So you took that as an opportunity to talk to Awpxey.
“Hey..” You whisper, bumping his knee with yours. He turns his head, responding in a quiet “hm?” As he finished the food he was chewing.
“You okay?” You continue to whisper, keeping your head as straight as possible while still attempting to look at him.
“Yeah I’m good.” He whispered back, nodding.
“Good.” You nodded, giving him a smile before returning back to your food.
Once you all began to approach the end of your meals, you noticed everybody start to sit up straighter, clearing their throats.
Oh God.. The questions were to start now…
“So Awpxey..” Your father started, Awpxey already had his head up, his eyes and ears focused on your father to catch every word he said.
“What do you do? For the clan?” He finished.
Awpxey cleared his throat, “I am a Warrior.” Your father’s eyes widened for a split moment.
“Warrior?” Awpxey nodded. “Yes sir, I am.”
“How come..” Your father’s eyebrows were furrowed. “How come I’ve never seen you?”
Awpxey smiled, “I guess I’m not that important, or just unnoticeable.” You wrapped your fingers around his, your face scrunching in confusion.
His smile.. He looked so dejected, his eyes having a dog-tired look swirling in his irises.
You didn’t care if anyone at the table got mad at you for showing some type of ‘affection’ towards Awpxey.
Neytiri looked at the both of you, a smile on her face as she noticed the slight movement under the table.
“You work along side your father?” Your dad asked, wanting to change the subject as he as well noticed the expression on Awpxey.
Awpxey nodded, “most of the time, unless we’re assigned apart to different groups.” Your father hummed and nodded.
Neytiri cleared her throat quietly, bringing the attention of everyone to her.
“I made kalin paste. If anybody wants any?”
Everyone around the table quickly nodded. Your mother looked towards Jake, pointing her chin to the pot that held the paste.
“And don’t eat it all while you’re over there.” Your fathers ears twinged purple in embarrassment.
“I won’t..” He muttered, his lips pursed as he walked to the steaming pot.
Minutes later, you all had your own servings of the kalin paste. Lo’ak with the most on his plate.
As you finished up your plate, you took the time to look around at your family.
Neteyam, he was in his own world, Lo’ak, he was still scraping for scraps of the paste on his plate, Kiri, she was fiddling with something in her hands, your parents, who were talking with their hands in front of their face as if they were gossiping like teenagers.
Which they were.
Now on your right, closest to your parents was Awpxey. And you were unprepared when you turned your head to look at him to find him already staring at you.
“Hey..” He whispers, a smile on his face.
“Hi.” You whisper back, the same smile mirroring onto your face.
“Can you tell your mom that her kalin paste is the best I’ve had? It’s really good, please tell her.” You smiled, your hand coming to cover it as you nodded in agreement.
“What are you doing?” As he asked, you hesitated in answering, but you had already decided.
“People Watching.” You say with an embarrassed smile.
“People Watching?” Awpxey echoes curiously. You were relieved when you didn’t hear any type of disgust or disappointment in his tone or face. He was genuinely curious.
“It’s where you kind of just, uhm, you know. Watch people? But it’s not that simple. You- you mostly actually observe them. And think, think a lot about what they’re like, or what they can be like. What they could be like. You evaluate them, study, but on a emotional and physical note? When you People Watch, you aren’t supposed to judge, because all it is, is an observation, and thinking.” As you end your rambling, you bring a hand to your mouth and squeeze it tightly, not even for a second.
It was an unfortunate habit you developed young when you realized you talked to much.
Awpxey noticed, and in an attempt to distract you, he grabbed your hand gently. Intertwining your fingers together.
“That’s really cool.” He squeezes your hand, a toothy smile adorning his lips.
“You think so?” Your eyes search his, looking for any type of sign that could show he’s lying.
“Of course! How long have you been doing this?”
“My whole life. It’s actually like a hereditary thing. Mostly between the females in my family. My grandma, her mom, my mom, my late aunt, my sisters do it too, only sometimes. And my brothers.” You roll your eyes at the me ruin of your brothers, thinking of mostly Lo’ak. He stares at people. Little weirdo.
You hoped, hoped that this genetic trait didn’t scare him away and make you look even more like the weirdo you are.
It doesn’t, it really doesn’t.
All these little things you tell him, these details. He eats it all up, saving it to his memories and saving it to learn more about it later.
He was planning to try and do this “People Watching” trick when he got home, or when his stomach wasn’t as full.
Maybe he could try it with his parents? His friends while they train, or just strangers around the clan.
Though nobody in this clan is really a stranger.
“I wanna try it,” he frowned. You laughed, “why are you frowning? You could try it now if you want? With my parents and siblings? But you might be too tired, kalin paste is heavy on the stomach.” He nodded in agreement.
“Can I do it tomorrow? I really wanna try it.” He slouched.
You smiled, “you can do it tomorrow. I think you’ll enjoy it.”
Awpxey smiled, looking at yours. His eyes trailed your face, looking at your lips.
It was as if his surroundings melted, Awpxey was stuck in a white space with just you. His hand squeezed yours tighter, eyes moving across your face in a triangular motion.
When he began to raise his hand to try and caress your chin, everything rushed back to him.
He’s still in your family’s hut, still sitting at your dining table, still with your family.
“Oh, uhm.” He stumbled, his hand slowly coming back down, lightly slapping against his lap.
You let out a small chuckle, wondering what was going through Awpxey’s head at this exact moment.
“Awpxey?” You mutter quietly, a small giggle escaping your mouth as you see him come back to reality, blinking a bit too hard.
“S-sorry Y/n..” He stuttered, you began to nod in response, opening your mouth to say something before something brushed against your back, skin brushed against your back.
You turn your head to look behind you, only to be met with a swaying Tuk, a drowsy weighed-down look on her face.
“Tuk?” Your sister took your attention from Awpxey. Though he had no problem with that with how questionable Tuk’s state was.
“Is she okay?” But Awpxey’s voice only echoed in the back of your mind, right now, the only thing you can think of is Tuk.
“Tuk? Tuk what happened?” You grasped her cheeks in your hands, turning her face towards you. You could tell she was mumbling something, but you could not see what.
“What are you saying Tuk? What happened?”
“A-ate to much… Ate to much kalin paste.. Stomach hurts and I’m very tired…” She mumbled.
You felt a bit relieved as you realized it wasn’t anything serious, but the fact she was in pain made you sad.
“Okay then Tuk,” you laugh. “I’ll go put you to bed, okay?”
All Tuk was able to offer back was a simple nod.
You stood up, scooping Tuk up in a bridal style. She was obviously very, very tired by the way she snuggled her head closer to your chest, curling up in your arms.
When you reached the sleeping mats, you placed Tuk on her respective mat, tucking her in, saying a quick prayer before you placed a kiss on her forehead and left.
When you arrived back at the table, your parents had asked you what happened with Tuk, which you explained.
“She ate to much kalin paste and got dizzy? But she was swaying and said her stomach hurt, oh, and that she was tired. So I just put her to bed.”
Your mother smiles and nodded in appreciation, you always made things a bit easier for her around the house.
You loved helping out, it would make you feel complete when you were always able to help people.
Awpxey watched you, he watched quietly as he seen you walk back to the table, an empty spot now behind you where Tuk was previously sat.
“Sorry about that. I just get really worried about my siblings.” You rub your hand against your forearm embarrassingly, not noticing Awpxey’s smile.
“Don’t apologize for it, it’s okay.” He messed with his loincloth. You smile, flashing a tired smile.
Awpxey had noticed, seeing the small bags under your eyes. “Hey, do you want me to go now? You look pretty tired.” Your eyes flicker to his, now at the fact it was pointed out, you started to feel sluggish. Your eyes struggling to keep themselves open as the kalin paste started to push down on your stomach.
“You know what? Now that you said that, I actually feel super tired.” You rub your eye, holding back a yawn in your throat. Awpxey smiled at you, “I’ll tell your parents.”
He turned towards your parents, who were still in their conversation, trying to find a part to speak to them without interrupting.
“Excuse me Mr. and Mrs. Sully?” Your parents stop, looking towards Awpxey, “yeah honey?” Neytiri says with a smile.
“I’m going to be heading home now, Y/n’s very tired and I don’t want to hold your family up any longer.” Neytiri and Jake both smiled, nodding their heads toward Awpxey.
“Okay Awpxey, be careful and make it home safe, okay?” Your mom said. Awpxey nodded, “I will Mrs. Sully! Thank you for having me for dinner, it was very good, and your kalin paste is the best!” Neytiri and Jake laughed together, your father nodding in agreement.
You smiled, getting up to walk Awpxey to the entrance of the hut. But what you didn’t know was that Kiri had also gotten up, following you both out the hut.
Right when you were about to wish Awpxey a goodnight and send him off, your sister, Kiri had rounded the corner coming to a stop at your side.
“Kiri? Is something wrong?” Your sister shook her head, looking forward to Awpxey.
“I wanted to bring him this, here you go Awpxey.” Your sister pushed an object into Awpxey’s hand.
Awpxey looked down at it, holding and feeling the smoothed surface of the object, not being able to tell what it was straight away.
“It’s a Lepidolite, a peace stone, it brings good luck. I’m giving it to you now that you are in a relationship with my sister, so you are both stable enough to take care of each other.” Kiri said with a sincere nod. Awpxey smiled, “thank you Kiri. That’s very thoughtful of you.”
You watched with smile, seeing how Awpxey fidgeted with the polished surface of the lilac-gray crystal.
“Goodnight guys, see you in the morning Y/n.” Kiri waved the both of goodbye, walking back into the hut and heading towards the sleeping mats.
You waved her goodbye, turning back towards Awpxey, feeling shy.
“Too quiet to say goodnight to me now too?” Awpxey teased as he leaned down to your face, trying to catch your eyes.
You giggled, “be quiet Awpxey.” Your cheeks burning as you smiled hard.
You turned your head up in his direction, smiling as you tried to hold back a laugh and make eye contact with him.
“Goodnight Awpxey, get a good nights rest, okay?” He nodded, reciprocating. “You too Y/n, sleep well..”
You both stood in a small silence, it was comfortable and not awkward. Awpxey was the one who made the initiating move and leaned forward, planting a small kiss on your lips.
You were quick to kiss him back, making sure not to leave his lips stranded for too long.
When you both parted, a small ‘smooch’ sound indicating that your lips separated, you stood with your hands clasped together behind your back.
“Goodnight Y/n.”
“Goodnight Awpxey.”
After finally saying goodnight, Awpxey walked back home, smiling all the way back to his hut. Happy to see his parents together in their sleeping mat.
When you were done recollecting yourself outside of your hut, you walked back inside. Shocked to find all the plates put away, hanging to dry.
When you walked toward the family room, looking to see where everyone went. You were not shocked to see everybody already asleep, tangled in their own bedrolls.
You were happy to see your parents together in their sleeping mat.
Getting into your mat and tucking yourself in, you reflected on your day. Thinking about how it was a really good day and how your family accepted Awpxey.
You yawned, turning on your left side as your eyes began to shut due to your tiredness.
Warmly, you let your body succumb to the drowsiness you felt.
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Oh my gosh you guys. This is longggg… I feel like almost all of my stories are long, maybe to long. Because I just write when I have the time and I don’t have like an active word count, so i just write. I apologize if it’s to much for you! Also I just want to mention @creamboba ! I didn’t know if you wanted to be tagged, I’m sorry if you didn’t! Oh my gosh please excuse any spelling mistakes I try my best to proof read but I get tired you guys. But anyway, thank you for reading 🤍!
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my3rzs · 2 years
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could i have a xavier thorpe request with an established relationship and the reader gets injured by the hyde or during the fight with crackstone? Thank you im just a sucker for angst.
KEEP YOU SAFE | x.t x fem!reader
summary: after getting a fight with xavier, you get injured
notice: she/her pronouns, swearing, reader gets hurt, overprotective xavier? bianca and xavier were never together, bianca is not a bully in here (i think thats all)
pairing: xavier thorpe x reader
a/n: i spent maybe 5 mins brainstorming abt the summary :’), but reblogs would help and im literally too embarrassed to read this so i could proofread it but enjoy lol, but check the hashtag #xavizgirl so you can see all my works there ahaha
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you and xavier had a fight last week and you haven’t talked to him ever since because he was jealous of a guy he saw you walking to class with,
though it was really stupid, you have to admit you did miss him a lot, you missed his stupid face, how he peppered you with kisses, how he handed you paintings of yourself or one of your favorite things you told him about, cuddling with him almost every night, you just miss him in general.
“hey, do you wanna hang out today? maybe go shopping?” bianca asks
you were too busy staring at a picture with xavier and you in it,
“huh?” you asked cluelessly as you heard muffled noises from her mouth
“let me guess, xavier? you’ve been ranting about the fight between you two for about a week, ya know?” the siren stated
“he’s just so stupid, he didn’t even let me finish what i was trying to say after he pulled me off the fucking guy!” you explained
“well, maybe you should just try confronting the boy. who knows you two just need to talk?” she answers
“well maybe i could do that, but what am i gonna say to him? it’s gonna be so awkward” you whined
“just explain how you’ve been feeling about the fight, how you barely know the guy, and stuff, but it has to be sincere and it has to come from your heart” she advised
“i’ll try my best, thank you bianca, i really owe you for this one okay?” you gave her a smile
“goodluck, y/n!” she gave you a thumbs up
-
you pulled out your phone go text xavier,,
y/n: hey can we talk?
xay: uh sure? why?
y/n: can we plz just talk
xay: ok, when and where
y/n: like rn, and maybe our spot in the woods
xay: ok be there rn
you hearted his message and put your cellphone into your pocket, you were walking in the forest so that you could meed up with xavier and make things right until a large, hairy, grey, big eyes, bloodshot monster stumbled you over, it looked like a beast or some sort of creature. it trapped you and before you knew it, it’s claw’s scratched your skin through your clothes twice and you were a literal bleeding mess. you tried to run as fast as you could and tried to grab your phone so that you could call an ambulance or xavier but realized you have dropped it while running, and that was all you remembered.
xavier was still waiting for you and he was starting to get impatient and think he was getting pranked, he has texted you nonstop and sent you calls but it kept going to voicemail, eventually.. he gave up and tried to go back to nevemore but he saw your unconscious body and you were bleeding.
“y/n? what the fuck!” he screamed as he saw you
“everything’s gonna be fine, everything’s gonna be fine” he said running to your body panicking and immediately called the ambulance
once they have arrived they took you into the truck, while xavier was so awfully worried and kept blaming himself while pacing, bianca and ajax walked up to him and asked what happened,
“it’s y/n.. she got fucking attacked!” the artist cursed
“hey, it’s gonna be alright, okay? the nurses and doctors are gonna make sure she’s gonna make it” ajax calms him down
“and besides, we can also visit her. dont worry, we’re all here for you xavier” the siren added
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it has been 3 weeks and you still haven’t woken up, xavier was so stressed, his lips are so dry, he looked like he hasn’t eaten in about a week, and he has very dark eye bags, it was the weekend and he decided to go visit you.
he opened the door and saw that you still haven’t woken up, he sighed and put one of his letters on the table.
“i miss you” he muttered while grabbing your cold hands
“it’s all my fault” the blonde boy sighs
you opened your eyes slowly and saw him tearing up a bit, “xavi..?” you say
“y/n! you’re awake!” he looked up and saw that you were awake so he quickly wiped his tears with his sleeve.
“were you crying, xavi?” you asked and tried to sit up and but felt a pain in your stomach and hissed in pain,,
“fuck!” you cried
“hey, hey, hey, the doctors say your stomach is still not okay, so they don’t recommend sitting for now, yeah? but they say it will heal a bit fast, so you’re gonna be okay, alright?” he dodged your question
“xavi.. you’re ignoring my question” you gave him a frown
“i’m not crying, silly. and even if i was it wouldn’t matter, we need to focus on you right now, bubs” he points to you
“and i kinda want to apologize, for you know.. being jealous and overprotective, i’m the reason you got here..” he says
“don’t blame yourself, i should’ve waited for the next day” you chucked reaching out for his hand
he held your hand and kissed your forehead, “i won’t let anything happen to you, i promise i’m gonna keep you safe, okay?” he assured
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i didnt know how to end this and got lazy ahahaha
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