#im throwing questions to the void
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if sasuke was the main character then he probably would've been a LOT more sympathised with than he is now (which is to say rarely). like the narrative wouldn't even need to change to show his pains or 'his side of the story', bc it does that plenty. it's just that he is not the main character. and idk what it is about our human minds but we tend to sympathise with main characters automatically (unless ofc you go off the rockers insane and do something like obliterate almost everyone from the planet *cough* eren yeager *cough*)
an instance that comes to my mind where this does happen is with lelouch from code geass. while i don't agree with his character motivations, people generally do sympathise with him as he is the mc and as viewers we know he isn't inherently evil. sasuke's goal towards the end is slightly similar but ofc people love to hate him so they don't even try to understand where he is coming from.
my point is, most people while engaging with the naruto story don't read between the lines and so don't see how traumatised and in pain sasuke is and hence don't understand his character motivations. heck, they don't understand a single bit about him and so they automatically hate him, as he is supposedly going against the main character's goals.
which is really sad given all that he has been through.
#there are bajillion other reasons people hate him for#honestly i have lost track of the stupid reasons i have seen people give for hating him#and sometimes they just do without any reason *not even exaggerating* unfortunately#im like yeah go on hate him. you guys obv don't have enough brain cells to comprehend his character#they never understood him. and it's not like any kind of reasoning is gonna make them change their minds#and it's not like one needs to do a deep character analysis to understand him. it's literally right there.#all you have to do is stop worshipping konoha and its militaristic policies and the people who enact said policies.#and also the people who enforce those policies while subtly hating them but can't do anything bc it's dictatorship :)#but maybe that's too much to ask of them bc that would mean they would need to question their political views#and we can't have that right bc it's all just fiction in the end right? and fiction exists in a void :) (yes I'm being sarcastic jc)#like the amt of times i have heard people say “you don't need to take this so seriously it's just fiction”#umm you do know that fiction is inspired by real life events right???#tldr: most people throw away their brains while engaging with nart media and have zero reading comprehension skills#this turned into yet another rant T T why am i like this AAAAAAAAAAA#sasuke#uchiha sasuke#sasuke uchiha#pro sasuke#pro uchiha#anti konoha
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Sometimes I sit and think about how nobody will ever show me affection in the same way I show it to others and I wonder why I'm even going out of my way to do this all in the first place.
#why don't you compliment me excessively like i do for you#im always there for you#why isn't anyone there for me#why do i have to be like this#i will never care if you reblog#questioning npd#questioning bpd#npd feels#npd safe#bpd feels#bpd safe#npd#thoughts to throw into the void
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I left Tumblr to make pride art only to come back realising I'm not actually straight after 18+ years
Uhm... Happy Pride Month to me too I guess?
I might delete this post who knows lol I don't like talking a lot about myself
I'm still not too sure about it, but me and my friend had a lot of talk over it
Tldr: me and my friend discovered that I might be androsexual if you wanna skip this poorly written yapathon
I've always felt an attraction towards guys, and I've always declined the thought of dating women because I'm just not interested.
But looking deeper into it, I don't think I like anyone that's fem aligned or identify as a girl.
And then I felt confused haha
Because earlier yesterday, I was scrolling through Twitter and saw an image of a butch lesbian. And for the first time, I didn't just think, "Woah, they look nice!" I thought, "Whoa, they look so handsome •///•"
Because they were a woman, and I don't like women. I always just go, "Aw, they're pretty!" Or "Hey, they're a pretty cool person!" And also, I've always avoided questioning myself, tiptoeing around the subject because what if I'm wrong? What if I'm pretending to be what I'm not? What if people assume I'm faking it just to be included in a community?
But this girl looked masculine and my heart did a whole bunch of flipflops and stuff as cringe as that may sound.
So I went to my friend to talk about this, because I felt like a dick being attracted to people who appear masc (even though I wouldn't necessarily care what someone would look like, so long as they were nice and friendly would I consider a relationship), but they assured me that there are people who like men and non-women (basically anyone who doesn't identify as a girl) and vice versa. And when I thought it over, I realized that I don't mind dating nonbinary people either, masc aligned or androgynous. It's just the femininity I'm not really into.
This answered a few questions for me, like why I was always more drawn to playing as males in games even though I'm perfectly happy with being a girl, or why I had these sorts of feelings. But I was still iffy, because it was worded like... A kink almost? And I know this is definitely not the case, because I rarely feel sexual attraction towards strangers or people I barely know.
While I know it's okay to not necessarily worry about labels and stuff, I wanted to find out exactly what was going on with me. So I just started googling and came across androsexuality. "People who feel attraction towards men or perceived masculinity, irrespective of whether or not the person is assigned male at birth." Or "Someone who is primarily attracted to masculinity, be this sexually, romantically, or aesthetically."
Not to mention that after looking into it more, it has slightly different definitions. Some people use it when they're attracted only to cis and trans men, some use it to express attraction to masculine people regardless of gender, but there are also people saying it's open to all genders while others say it's only open to nonbinary genders?? So of course I'd feel iffy using this identity if it's known for trying to put nonbinary people into gendered boxes.
But I had a lot of discussions over it. I learned many sexualities and what could possibly fit what I described to other people, and soon, I've come to realize that I'm not straight, but androsexual. All my life and into adulthood, I thought I was so sure, but I guess people learn about themselves a whole lot later than others.
All because a handsome lady made me head over heels lol /lh
#happy pride month#questioning#coming out#maybe#im still getting used to it#just spouting nonsense#androsexual#had to just sorta write this down and throw into the internet void
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Tried (and failed) to subtly come out to my parents today. It went as follows:
Mom: <makes a joke about how I won't want to watch the republican presidential candidate debates>
Me: yeah no I'm not gonna watch.
Dad: <jokingly> but you have to get all 12 sides of the story
Me: I don't really need to watch people 'debate' my right to exist
Dad: they're not debating your right to exist
Me: these things always boil down to "we have to do this about trans people" "we have to do this about LGBT people" I don't need that. It's upsetting
Mom: <missing the point> I don't think it'll be like that
Me: you don't think the republican presidential debate will be like that.
Mom: no i really dont
Me: it must be nice to believe that
Thank the gods for white noise machines and Dimension 20 so I didn't have to hear all the bullshit from these stupid debates because I think I would have cried
#i dont feel that me going 'yeah the republicans dont want me to exist' was that subtle#but naybe im wrong. idk. they missed the message either way#the one question i did hear was framing trans people in sports as a 'womens rights issue'#and the one person talking about a ban they put in place#so yeah. it was going how i expected#and my dad still doesnt seem to get that these people are talking about me and my friends and strangers who share this with me#pine throws thoughts into the void of tumblr
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A QUESTION FOR ANY1 FOLLOWING ME WHO MAY B PART OF A SYSTEM: so like. if u befriend someone who's part of a system. does that immediately make u sorta friends w/ all their alters??? or liek would you have 2 go friendship-boss-rush mode if u wanted to befriend everyone....
#just gonna throw dis silly question out into the void#im sure the answer differs on a case by case basis but!! yaknow...
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anxiety needs to fuck off and die fr though i literally feel like im gonna die over shit that is. so manageable and not going to matter in like a month or whatever who cares
#my post#im blaming tuesday for this even though it probably isnt the main reason#ignore me#vent#why cant i just go through experiences and not feel absolute dread after because i didnt do things perfectly#like of course i was so anxious doing those tests yesterday because of literally every factor involved#if i got all the math questions wrong then whatever it just means i need to relearn math shit in the classes. boohoo lmao#maybe i was a little tmi in the essay but they were asking a weirdly personal question as the prompt so idk maybe they expected tmi??#and its like. im sure my therapist will understand that i didnt even mean or want to miss session last week. my dad is just an ass sometimes#ITS LITERALLY SO WHATEVER LIKE NONE OF THIS IS THAT BAD SO WHY DO I FEEL LIKE EXPLODING#🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠👍👍🫠👍🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠 i didnt mean to add thumbs up emojis but it adds to it whatever#its like no matter how much i try to throw logic at these feelings it doesnt make it go away and i dont know why LIKE how do i stop it#i usually add the ignore me tag as just a shorthand way to say 'im saying whatever i want and i dont prefer interaction on this post'#but i mean it here this is literally just me screaming into the void so like. just ignore me
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I LOVE HOW YOU TAG PARAGRAPHS THEYRE FUN TO READ!! /gen
Thank you!!! I love to ramble!!!
#i'm so wordy. i am SO wordy. i never ever fail at a minimum word requirement#but oh god the second my uni says no MORE than 2000 words i freak out. what do you mean no more than 2000 words. does less than 2000 words#and tumblr not yelling at me about tag length even exist?#is it possible to not type out an entire paragraph when i have even a single thought? do people really go around with one word sentences in#side their heads all day? do you see a cool thing and go oh cool thing! and move on#instead of oh cool thing! this reminds me of my very specific brainrot!#which is to say chronic inability to shut the fuck up#so i'm glad. you are entertained lmao#that's all i intend! i'm literally blogging tumblr is a blogging platform. the point is to put my thoughts out there! throw them out! into#the void! the dark abyss (i use the goth rave dashboard theme so this is literal) and hope#just hope i get like a call back. a little nod. and i got one <3 thank you <3#also (genuinely) i'm assuming /gen means /genuine but like it could also mean /general or some kind of acronym like pos (piece of shit) so.#am i right? im not. up to date. the last time#i paid attention to txt spk and it's ilk was like 2015#i make assumptions but i am Often Wrong (i still don't know what tfw stands for my brain just goes 'time for when' and it's like 'yeah that#sounds legit' and i'm like 'what the fuck are you talking about? time for when? that doesn't even make sense.#why do you think that sounds legit?'#but i'm asking myself that question so i dont' get an aswer. ah well#you can tell i should be sleeping rn. i get even more verbose and use words like ilk when i'm tired. hence: sleep time now yes.#but again; for real all jokes and minor japes aside: thanks! i'm glad i'm really not just shouting into the void for nobody to hear here.
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Love when D&D gets cancelled the minute we're supposed to start it and now I'm just disassociating again because that was the one fuckin thing I could focus on and ground myself too and now I will simply remain Untethered until who fuckin knows when because everytime 1 session gets cancelled with this group it cancel spirals for 7 more fucking weeks.
#love that the person who was crying about missing 2 people in a party of 5 players is the new guy#like fuck face weve played with 3 party members for so much longer than you've been a part of the group#we literally got an extra perso. so we can play is 2 people cant make it#and here you are fucking throwing a hissy fit#and then you turn around and fucking ask rp questions to the dm?!#fuck off dude#i know i shouldn't fucking rely on people or d&d for something like a drink of water for my mental health ya know but im tired#into the void
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oh….. the THINGS i would give for a @forgettable-au movie……..
gang- okay…
The vision of Papyrus and Gaster at Wingdings’ funeral…. was so vivid in my head. And now its going to be there forever. and i have 0 complaints.
Dunno if any of you have played Omori, but SPOILERS!
the context to this is kinda like the Blackspace segment. Papyrus is in his head sorting out the shit he needs to sort out through metaphors n such. But Gaster is also there because he can do that because theyre the same person (IT MAKES SENSE)
I imagine that whole thing happens right after Papyrus regains all his wingdings memories like he gets knocked out or something- IM MAKING A LOT OF ASSUMPTIONS HERE LIKE HE MIGHT NOT EVEN REMEMBER, EVER!!! I REALLY HOPE HE DOES!!! BUT!!!
Just let me have my silly fanfics…
After a lot of fighting and agony over the question of WHO IS PAPYRUS? ESPECIALLY AFTER HE’S LEARNED TOO MUCH?
it ends with a somber scene of putting Wingdings to rest, letting his 2 halves live their own lives.
Papyrus asks “Why did you do this?” as in… Why did you bring me here? and why did you do what you did? throwing yourself into the void?
Gaster has the same answer for both of those questions
Thats my theory, I think a lot of Gaster/Wingdings’ ambition, in game and in comic, is just curiosity
TIME FOR SOME FUN LITTLE EASTER EGGS!!!
In the first frame, theres a raindrop in front of Papyrus’ eye socket, meant to allude to Wingdings’ eye lights.
Also the field is filled with Echo and Golden flowers. Echo represents Wingdings, and Golden represents Papyrus. Gaster is just Gaster, don’t worry about him
I also had fun making the save point star look sorta like a cross from the distance…cause yknow…heaven….TEEHEE
I got emotional putting “dearest brother” on the grave cause I couldnt put any more stuff like “closest friend” or “dear son”….Sans was kinda all he had…
and lastly heres some bonus behind the scenes stuff because I have enough room for it
some sketches, and a speedpaint with the best instrumental song ever made from the best liveaction movie ever made that has absolutely nothing to do with the forgettable au (Little Miss Sunshine - “THE WINNER IS”)
Highly recommend, 100/10, makes me UGLY SOB, think the undertale gang would like it (especially Papyrus and Undyne)
#undertale#undertale fanart#forgettable au#undertale au#forgettable au fanart#undertale comic#undertale fan comic#papyrus undertale#wingdings forgettable#wingdings finally getting a proper funeral#cause no one knew he died#and like TECHNICALLY HE DIDNT???#But papyrus is so different#and i feel like gaster will be too#so like#he dead#god please#let this not age horribly#papyrus got knocked out and flowey is like PAPYRUS??? BUDDY??? YOU THERE??????#he wakes up and is like cured of all of his mental problems#Sans! Sans guess what I just remembered!!#whatjya remember?#EVERYTHING.
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“YOU CAN’T DISAPPOINT A PICTURE” — or an alt title: roo vs. jenson to roo and jenson
from the freezing act and disappearing act to no choice not to act (do i know what i meant? absolutely not.)
a/n yarg hey this is set on 2022 and the rest of 2023, after the events of the great (coming not so soon but im workin on it)
THE KANGAROO VS. THE WORLD
2022
it was her first points. her first points... ever in formula one. she was on… a different kind of high. nothing was going to ruin that moment for her. nothing except one.
as of right now, she was not noticing anything else besides the man in front of her—and even that was debatable.
this time, it was her turn to be catatonic.
daniel, who was one of the blokes lucky enough to witness what was currently happening in front of him could not help but laugh, well, he was putting his entire life into not laughing. but, well, it was hard not to.
he’s—no one, has ever seen her like this before.
she was usually so… either kept to herself or an absolute menace. there was really no in-between. but one for sure thing she always is was functional, even is the function is cracked up to a hundred or zero. so to see her malfunctioning was way funny for daniel.
daniel, still giving his entire life not to laugh, answers the question for her, “of course, she will! right, kid?”
at that, her blubbering stopped and her attention was fixed on the australian—that had betrayed her.
her mind was still reeling in—half present and half out of it, “i—yea—huh?” she looked towards daniel for… anything.
he didn’t respond with anything else and pulled on her race suit that was now unzipped and collecting around her waist down, her top half showing off the crimson-red fireproofs she wore underneath.
her mind was going faster than an rb19 and the next thing she knew she was sitting in the middle of a very fine world champion she was so ready to risk everything for and… and daniel ricciardo.
she was so in her own world, she failed to notice the former calling out her name.
oh my god, he knows my name, she thought.
she cleared her throat, posture changing feigning ‘professionalism’, “what was that?”
“congratulations on scoring your first points today!”
she blinked. she knew what he said. she was just… processing.
truly, she didn’t know how or why it happened or even what had happened at all but she somehow ended up in a finger guns position pointing at her long-time celebrity crush.
she stayed at the end position for quite a while. besides the sound of the track and every other surroundings, it was quiet. jenson was too stunned to speak; roo was berating herself in her head absolutely throwing every curse word in her head—if anyone were to read her mind right now, they would start crying from all the screams and cries of her own stupidity. daniel—now, daniel on the other hand; was having the time of his life. the dam had broken and he was now clutching his stomach besides the girl laughing his ass off.
his—very loud, very distracting—laugh paused her inner turmoil at herself and directed all towards him. her eyes were void of any emotions and her entire look was unpredictable. she narrowed her eyes at the australian before quickly fisting her hand out to hit the man right where he was clutching it, making him grunt in shock and eventually drop to the ground groaning—his laugh somehow still straining behind.
still in pain, from both his laughter and the hit, daniel managed between discomfort, “oh—you’re good, man, you’re good.”
her eyes were still trained down to the rolling australian, giving him her deadliest-calmest glare later on slowly look up to meet jenson’s; completely freezing in her spot once more with eyes wider than max’s winning gap as if his stare was one of medusa’s.
later on, she found herself in the haas—they stopped trying to get rid of her eventually—hospitality with mick sitting on one of the chairs and herself pacing around the room talking his ear off.
“i hate daniel! i hate him! i told him a million times! i never wanted to meet jenson in person! i just wanted a picture! i hate him so much!” she whined, stomping around the room dramatically.
eventually she sat herself down next to mick. not knowing how else to respond, he extended his hand and giving her a few pats on the shoulder.
“you know, he’s probably was very happy to see you too.” he tries.
“don’t.”
he raised both his hands in surrender.
it was an interesting sight to see: britney spears walking and talking with snoopy in the paddocks.
“i just think he’s neat, you know.” she explained with a shrug.
the older man chuckled with a shake of his head, “you do know you’re talking about a cartoon dog, right?”
she gasped, “rude. he is the cartoon dog.” with a hand over her heart, she then continues, “he’s more than that! he’s a pilot, an icon, and most importantly; a best friend.” she paused, remembering a detail she forgot to mention, “—to woodstock. i don’t care about charlie brown, that kid’s an idiot.”
nico made a contemplating face, “you’re so mean to him why—”
she was about to reply until she was cut off by a british accent that made her entire blood run cold and paralyze her nerves, eyes widening slightly—position permanently cemented to the ground where her body jerked to a stop.
“oh, hey, jense!” he greeted back, turning his attention and entire body away to face the blonde getting closer.
to her dismay, he waved the world champion over.
(what is that—what the hell?! I’M SWEATING BULLETS LIKE A FUCKING WATERFALL.)
he was getting closer.
(FUCK!—what do i do?)
closer.
“yeah, i was just here talking to—” nico said as jenson was in easier earshot, his hands already motioning to his side. just as he turned around the moment the brit arrived by his side, he was met with dust. besides that, no other evidence showed there was once a girl in an alfa romeo racing suit next to him. “wha—kid?” he looked around, “where’d she go?”
jenson frowned slightly, “ah. sorry about that, mate. most likely my fault.”
nico turned to him confused, “what?”
he shrugged sadly, “i don’t know. that kid is like allergic to me i think—never got any chance to properly talk to her.”
again nico put his thinking face on and after a good few conversations with himself in his head, his face cracked up with a smile.
he slapped jenson’s back and rest his hand there—shocking him in the process—“believe me, she doesn’t.”
end of 2023
she. was. done.
finally.
this year was definitely not her year and she was glad it was over.
during their final debrief mick was her pillar; she was on her last set of batteries and was about to shut down, the entire time she had her head resting on his shoulder half-asleep. he didn’t complain, thankfully—surprisingly none of her team either.
after they declared dismissed, she was so ready to be hauled—by who, she didn’t really know. but man she wished—back to her bed—did not matter which one but whichever the closest was—and pass out until the next season starts.
unfortunately, it was not that easy yet for her.
the only people left in the room was her, porsche’s team principal, his assistant, her head engineer, and... mikey.
now that she really thinks about it, she doesn’t really know what it is mikey does.
“you look rough.” the man started. “not wearing any makeup today?” he asked genuinely. he knew how much makeup therapy usually improves her mood, which is why it made sense to him seeing her so—gone.
“i am wearing makeup.”
“oh.”
“yeah.”
he motioned for her to take a seat, and so she did.
the air was… unreadable. usually it’s pretty light with them, they loved her and she loves them. maybe it was the lack of mick in the room?
she was so tired, she didn’t care for the thick silence in the room, opting to just break it herself.
“am i getting sacked? are you going to make me burn my own contract?”
she was getting dangerous. tired roo means her defense systems are losing charge—if she was a drinker, this would be a glimpse of her in an honest drunk state.
no one really stopped her so her mouth just kept moving, “i mean, i wouldn’t be surprised after the year i had i was kinda shit—i’d be pretty sad, though. i love you guys. i love you,” she looked at her engineer, “i love you,” she looked to her personal trainer, “i love you,” to her team principal. and last but not least, “and i love you.” she looked slightly up at her team principal’s assistant that stood behind him.
“oh good grief, when the hell is he getting here?” the man in the middle whispered under his breath as he rubbed his forehead, in the background the driver still mindlessly listing all the people she loves.
“and i love that guy who always has chocolate for me—oh wait that’s mick again.”
“just got a text from jackie says they’re close.” whispered back mikey.
as if on cue, right after mikey locked his phone, the door opens—thankfully—stopping roo’s listing, catching all of their attentions.
she was still yapping when she turned to the door but came to an abrupt stop when she sees the person who walks in.
the man waved.
“oh no, it’s jenson button.” she says flatly—at this point it was like she was drugged with truth serum; her words held no emotions or feelings whatsoever, but everyone was sure it was all genuine.
she was about to turn back to her team when with no warnings, no wind, no signs, she was hit with a tsunami—not even joking. the moment her head turned her face was splashed with a bucket of cold water.
so. so. cold.
oh that definitely woke her up.
“WHAT THE FU—”
as if she hadn’t had enough thrown at her, a towel was draped over her head before she can finishing cursing out her team. (one, to dry her up and two, to shut her up.)
emerging from under her towel, she looked towards the three culprits’, eyes going from jenson button at the front of the room and back to them, “in front of jenson button?!” she scolded in a whisper.
“it humanizes you,” explained her team principal shortly.
she quieted. sucked in a breath and stare at him flatly, “die.”
mateo—her team principal—was unfazed by it, opting to ignore her comment instead and continue with the business they had originally set up for.
“now that you’re awake,” he started.
“whatever.” she rolled her eyes.
ignoring her, mateo continues, “i’m going to put this in simple words you’ll understand.”
“why do you hate me?”
“i know you don’t like to talk about… whatever the hell this year was, but one thing for sure, we—” he motioned towards himself, mikey, and olivia (her head engineer), “—decided it’d be good for you to have a manager.”
she stayed silent, blinking her thoughts in until she found her words;
“and he is… your best candidate?” she asked stiffly motioning to the british driver that she’s sure can kill her with a stare.
mateo looked anywhere but anyone, slightly dodging the question. he shrugged, “well.”
“seriously?!” commented the world champion. he rolled his eyes and made way to sit on the chair next to hers, slightly making the hair on her arms rise. “look, kid, i know it’s probably going to be hard for you to even be in the same room with me—but i promise, i would not be doing this if i weren’t sure of you. you are one of the best talents i’ve seen in my life and i think i could help you reach a lot more good things.”
she took in his words and she’d be lying if hearing all those things coming out of his mouth didn’t give her a type of sensation—butterflies in her stomach, warmness in her heart, and the burning tears building behind her eyes—and a surge of courageous in her veins.
she smiled, “no, i think you’re right. and, i mean, i’m in the same room as you right now and i’m all fine.”
after that, papers were signed and deals were made, and to her; the rest was history.
(including all her previously embarrassing moments.)
princess (mick) HSAZGFKJSDGS YOU WOULD NOT BELIEVE i js died oh my god what did i do
te1enoviyuh 🎵 Simple Minds • Don't You (Forget About Me)
liked by f1porsche, atticusingh, and 4,476,928 others
tagged: jensonbutton
te1enoviyuh mischief not managed zzz
see all 487 comments.
roomcgrittle CONSTABLE REGGIE
buttoncunt JENSON????? kid r u even alive still
dunphyrrari did u fall asleep typing the caption
te1enoviyuh dunphyrrari okay thats funny u deserve a notice
dunphyrrari te1enoviyuh I WON
f1porsche Watch out (the rest of) 2024 they’re coming for you. 😉
selvnika i thought *i* was your manager...
te1enoviyuh selvnika if anything IM your manager. your around the clock arounf the world babysitter
sargeantist selvnika now hold on... back tf UP. WDYM MANAGER??
schupastry sargeantist JUST STAY CALM DO NOT MAKW ANY ASSUMPTIONS.
disneyprincemuke im just here for the ride tbh
bonus
mateo sighs at his phone, his employee no better than before she had management.
“do you ever regret this? ‘cause i do. —kinda.” commented the unlucky woman known as her pr manager (jackie.)
“who thought this was a good idea, again?”
being the self-aware king himself; mikey immediately choked on his water and quickly made his escape.
anyone noticed a cameo? not proofread | taglist; @treehouse-mouse @disneyprincemuke @yansbolobao @leilanixx @judespoision @vellicora @bborra @woozarts crossed out means i cant tag u
#f1 x reader#f1 fanfic#f1 imagine#formula one x reader#formula one#formula 1#formula 1 x reader#formula 1 x you#formula 1 x female reader#f1 smau#formula 1 smau#formula one smau#formula 1 x oc#tine’s roo vs the world#f1 x driver!reader#f1 x you#jenson button x reader
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Hello, in case your requests are without any guidelines, can you a fic like this:
You saved the life of I.N., who was fatally injured in a deal gone wrong, but you're oblivious that he's from SKZ (an underground group known to be dangerous).
Let me know if you have any questions? Thanks for considering!
⭑ “i owe you” ⭑ pt.1
⭑ jeongin x female reader
⭑ content includes: non-idol reader, non-idol jeongin, causal mentions of blood and scars, mentions of other members (bang chan), reader is a doctor
⭑ note: by no means am i a doctor so please correct any of my terminology if its not used correctly.
⭑ minors dni
the red traffic light glowed in the cold, dark night, forbidding you from shutting your eyes. your car's broken clock insisted it was 12:08 AM, though you knew it must be at least 4:08 AM. The familiar alleyway you always surveyed after your dreaded shift was usually populated by drug dealers, homeless souls, and discarded beer cans. tonight, however, a figure crouched there, clutching his right hand and gazing up at the moon...
fortunately a parking spot was open right after the traffic stop and you rush your first aid kit out of the back, pacing to this odd instance. running up to strange man at 4 in the morning wouldn’t be ideal, but you’re a doctor who believes there is good in everyone, and leaving someone hurt is morally wrong. your footsteps slow down as you approach him, eventually stopping to make out his face.
his face was illuminated by the moon he looked up to for hope. his eyes were sharp and dreamy, reminiscent of a fox’s gaze. a fresh scar ran down his left cheek, hinting at a serious injury. you couldn’t make anything else of his condition, but it seemed severe and the only solution would be taking him home to treat him.
“e-excuse me?”
his eyes flickered to the direction of your voice, squinting at your - not too appealing - presence. regardless of his beauty, his tattoos and shredded, soiled clothes lent him an intimidating feel.
“who are you?” his voice couldn’t be described as deep, but rather a large and empty void.
“im y/ln, doctor at the local hospital here. i noticed you looked injured and came to help”
“im fine”
you moved closer to him, shining a small flashlight on his body. the injuries were severe and far from fine. knife wounds, bruises and a split lip covered his body, causing him to lose more blood by the minute.
“im sorry, but i cannot leave you in this condition”
he grunted, his grip tightening on his hand, struggling to give you an audible response.
“just. leave.”
you act quick and throw his limp arm around your shoulder, guiding him slowly to your car. his blood seeped into your shirt, but what worried you more was his life being between your hands.
“fuck! can’t you see it’s an open wound?” your body jumped at his cries, feeling heavier with sympathy for him. you tried your best to disinfect his wounds gently, but the pain would be near intolerable.
“it’s almost over” you whispered to him, too focused to answer him back properly.
he sat on the sofa of your living room, taking in the art works you hung on the wall to distract him from the gruesome pain. every now and then he would flinch or grunt, but it’s nothing you’ve never dealt with before as a doctor.
you near the end of his ‘procedure’ and move to his face, inspecting the deep scar that ran across his cheek and his busted lip. a mix of disappointment and curiosity washed over you, expressed in a long sigh.
“what did you get yourself into?”
“nothing”
“what’s your name?” your questions were an attempt to distract the painful alcohol grazing his cuts, but his hissing and grunting never came to a stop.
“j-jeong in”
you repeat the name to yourself, its familiarity nudging at your head. while preparing the bandages, you couldn’t help but take in his strong facial features. he looks back at you too, eyes outlining every detail of your face. you couldn’t shake the feeling of familiarity, so you give it up to him being an old patient but a tattoo on his neck catches your eye, denying your conclusion.
(SKZ)
“SKZ? where have i heard that before?” it sounded like something that may have been in the newspapers they handed out to the doctors offices, or something on the news channel, but the lack of sleep wouldn’t be able to catch onto anything.
“you forced me into your home to fucking question me?!” he screamed at your face, looking at you in disgust. the words caught in your throat and you felt like crying, your thoughts crashing down. today had been stressful enough, and having someone scream at you was the last straw. jeongin notices the beads of tears forming on your waterline, changing his expression in a matter of seconds.
“please, just finish so i can leave” he sighs, turning to face the sunrise that peeked through the curtains. the teardrop falls on your leg and you return to what you should’ve been doing, feeling bad for the unnecessary confrontation you gave him.
a contact named “bang chan” buzzed his phone and he picks it up, placing it up to his ear and squirming at the pain of the alcohol on the scar of his cheek. you attempt to listen to some of the muffles from the other side, hoping you can conclude your suspicions about him.
jeongin- “yea?”
bang chan- “where are you man?”
jeongin- “getting treated by a random doctor in her house”
his eyes dart from his arm to your face, holding your gaze.
bang chan- “are you crazy? we are high profile by the police and you’re at a random doctors house?”
his tone was clearly sterner, but all the noises you could hear faded at the thought of having someone wanted infront of you. your body stiffens but you act clueless, worried of how dangerous he may be.
jeongin- “just… ill be back”
bang chan- “man this isn’t funny at all. you’re getting us in some deep shit”
jeongin- “she looks like she wouldn’t tell a soul”
bang chan- “a doctor? you couldn’t pick a worse person to help you?”
he scans your face for any fear or regret, but you hold back any emotions until he would be out of your house and safe.
bang chan- “god you’re so fucking oblivious. be here before the afternoon”
he laughs at his comment, ending the call.
you put all the equipment back to its place as jeongin sips on a mug of green tea, slouching on the couch. as a doctor you couldn’t let him out too early and he had to be watched for at least a day. but you were worried of his criminal state and if his friend would barge the door of your house open.
“you’ll need to rest. don’t get yourself involved in any of… that”
he nods, getting up to place his mug on the counter and head for the door.
“thank you. really”
you close your eyes, nodding at him and inspecting his bandages one more time.
“i owe you”
and with that, it would’ve been the last encounter with him. many questions ran through your head but it would autopilot to your couch, falling asleep to the memory of his ethereal but odd face.
the alleyway remained significant to you, always looking for him, or for another injured individual. but with the overflowing pressure of becoming a doctor and having no time to yourself, everything would fade away and it would become endless hours of work.
FIVE YEARS LATER
you parkoured between your new neighbors boxes to get to your door,
placing the groceries on the floor and rummaging for your key. your eyes couldn’t help but dart to the many boxes. the apartment next to you is finally occupied after a mysterious 3 years of nobody renting it.
at the collection of that thought, the door of the new neighbors unlocks, startling you. a mans back faced you, his hair orange, wearing a black leather jacket and black jeans. it was only when he turned that your heart may have stopped. his features were unmatched and unique, taking you a while to absorb before greeting him.
“hey! new neighbor?”
he didn’t respond for a while, looking at you with confusion.
“your name?”
“it’s y/n. im a doctor at the local hospital here. what about you?”
“jeongin”
recollections of that very night begin to flow through your mind and how everyday for weeks you stared into the dark alleyways, trying to picture his body there. immediately your eyes dart to his neck, only to find his tattoos slightly fading.
(SKZ)
your eyes dart back to his face, still questioning if it was true or not.
“i owe you”
PART 2
⭑ TAG LIST
@captainchrisstan @rylea08 @strayywayy @all4minnie @katsukis1wife @kayleefriedchicken
#stray kids#stray kids oneshot#skz#skz smut#stray kids smut#skz fanfic#skz scenarios#kpop#kpop oneshots#kpop bg#kpop smut#x reader#bang chan#bangchan x reader#lee know#lee know x reader#changbin#changbin x reader#hwang hyunjin#hyunjin x reader#han jisung x reader#jisung x reader#lee felix#lee felix x reader#seungmin#seungmin x reader#jeongin#jeongin x reader#smut#angst
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Can I request 15 and 34 from the fluff prompt list with either Logan or Charlie, please? Congrats on 600!! 💙💛💙💛💙💛💙💛
Join my 600 Follower celebration!!
15 - “I’m asking because I’ve seen the way you look at me.”
34 - “I shouldn’t be allowed to be this happy.”
a/n: Thank you for requesting!!! Funny enough though they're both fluff prompts this somehow turned angsty dasflk;j im so sorry i do it to myself
He's hiding something. You know he is. Logan has just been different. I mean he was always grumpy and short tempered but this was something else. You thought, or well you had hoped that your time in the void had really bonded you.
You were trash from another universe while he had gotten dragged through hell by Wade. He got you and you got him. You were a failure to your universe so they pruned you. Logan was the worst variant of Wolverine. Something felt nice about having someone else who was the worst with you.
Ever since you landed in Wade's universe you had only gotten closer. Both of you picking up odd jobs for money until you finally landed a steady bakery job. Horribly early hours and lots of hard work but it meant you could be home by lunch. Logan was often out late too. He wouldn't tell you what he was doing but he came back with enough rent money so you didn't question him. You used to eat lunch together. It was a way to make sure the both of you were actually taking care of yourselves. It wasn't anything fancy. Just sandwiches or pasta or something easy.
But for some reason Logan has been avoiding you. Constantly. To the point where he'd leave the room if you were there. It was really starting to bug you. You don't know what's going on with him. You catch him staring sometimes. His eyes are worn and broken. When you try and approach him they harden right back up and he stalks away. It was infuriating.
You finally reached your boiling point when you came home early from work one day. Your back aching and you're dead tired. You lean your forehead against the door, just taking a moment. Then you hear him laugh. You know it's him. He's got this unmistakable snort that he tries to hide but he can't. So he's just avoiding you, no one else. Its you. You're the problem and you don't understand why. In a fit of anger you slam the door open.
"Out! Everyone except for you." You point at Logan. The room clears quickly. Wade opens his mouth to say something but you glare with a ferocity so strong he shuts up.
"Good luck kitty cat!" He whisper yells before hurrying out the door.
"What?" Logan grumbles, his eyes averting to the ground. You scoff and throw your things on the couch.
"What is your problem? You've been avoiding me."
"Why do you fucking care? Not like we were close anyways." He asks with a roll of his eyes.
"Bullshit Logan. I'm asking because I’ve seen the way you look at me. I see you across the room look so sad but the moment I even take a step you're back to this shit." You gesture to his closed off stance.
He's running from you and you demand to know why. He puffs out his chest and stands up. Mumbling about how ridiculous this is and tries to walk away from you.
"Logan! For fucks sake!" You follow him, your anger morphing into confusion as he continues to run.
"Just tell me what I did?!" Your voice breaks as the desperation comes out. You just want him back.
"Nothing!" He growls as he turns back to face you. Slamming his hand against the wall. You jump as he cages you in. He's breathing hard as he stares at you. This is the closest you've been in weeks.
"Nothing. You didn't do anything wrong." His voice is softer, sadder.
"There has to be something Logan. I miss you." He sighs and clenches his fist.
Fuck he thought he could avoid this. That he could get you to run away before he fucked it all up but for some reason you're still here.
"I shouldn’t be allowed to be this happy. I mean just look at me.” Logan thinks so low of himself. He always has. He's a fucked up lost cause. Everyone he cares about dies or gets hurt and its always his fault.
"You make me happy." He confesses.
You make him feel unlike anything else. Like he's not the monster he was. You look at him and he just, smiles. It's weird and strange and a feeling he's not used to. It scares him to his core.
"Man you really are stupid." You say in disbelief.
"I...What?" Logan looks confused but you grab his face and kiss him.
He stumbles back in surprise but ends up taking control quickly. Pushing you against the wall and digging his hands into your hips.
"You make me happy too Logan, so please don't run away from me."
You comb your fingers through his hair as you tug him closer to you. He closes his eye as he leans his forehead on yours. The urge to shut you out is there, listening would be easier but there's a chance at real happiness right in in front of him and he'd be a fool to ignore it.
"Fuck it." He grabs your waist and pulls you tight. Smashing his lips onto yours in a messy kiss.
He can be selfish, just this once.
Just for you.
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Could you do a thing for ronin with a partner that’s transmasc but dresses really fem and feels really insecure and like they aren’t an actual guy because of how they present?
(totally not projecting shhhhhhh)
Ah, well. I’ve been planning this for quite awhile actually… well, I suppose you wouldn’t mind some of my work again. ~ DP
CW / TW :
- Gender Dysphoria
- Running / Intrusive Thoughts
- Anxiety
SPOILERS FOR KILLER CHAT
Enjoy.
Petticoats and Blood.
You stared at the coord you had made yourself for the next day. The mannequin sported your petticoat and purse for the next day. Dressing pretty and very nice was your forte after all. Even if it did garner unwanted criticism from so-called “normal” people. It made you happy to dress in frilly skirts, ruffled blouses, cute bonnets. The works for your average sweet style that everyone either loved or criticized ( for whatever reason… )and it made you question whatever was going on through their minds as well.
You hesitate for a second, hanging up the dress and putting away the jewelry for the night. Until your phone pings with a notification and ultimately throws off your insecure thoughts for the moment.
You pick up the phone, eyes narrowed as you stared at the text that the man you who had fallen for ( which you questioned why Ronin had put his name as “ Thy Divine Devil “ ) spammed your phone.
goreboy : darlin’
goreboy : come On. im bored and I want to see Your Pretty mug :)
You frown a bit, the word pretty sticking out like a sore thumb. In all honesty, you never bothered to correct him so how would he even know? All he knew was your identity change and your identity struggles. He’d help with the process, buying you your binder was a plus you didn’t know you needed and a man who knew how to inject testosterone to satisfy your euphoric needs?
Double whammy.
Ronin kept spamming, your frown evident as you shot him a text with a exasperated sigh.
[ User ] : What’s up? :)
You watched as his username popped up and slowly typed. Your impatience grew as you planted yourself down onto your bed with a quiet tap of your foot. Nose scrunched as your dysphoria feuded with your mentality. Hands gripping your phone as his message came through.
goreboy : can’t I just try to See You?
goreboy : But nahhhh, i’ll keep you updated when I see You :)
goreboy : i love you darlin’. keep Your Head up.
Your heart clenched as your throat tightened with a gentle tug of your vocal cords. Your voice didn’t even want to leave as you opened your mouth to say something into the random void of your goddamn room.
“Damn…”
You muster up the word, immediately jumping up to get dressed into some random clothes you had strewn about. Eyes alert and teary as you shrugged on some hoodie that Ronin had gave you some time ago. It’s material plush and gentle on the body. Black in color with a skull on its front.
It honestly screamed Ronin.
Your hand traced the pattern, sighing as you slipped on your shoes and grabbed your keys.
You usually dressed up, even for something simple as this ( meeting Ronin at his usual alleyway ) and even doing a minimal amount of makeup. But you shrugged off the heavy feeling, the dysphoria practically screaming as you got into the car that Ronin had fixed a few months prior to your ‘accidental’ meeting.
You parked a few blocks away from the spot, scrambling out and locking the car before jogging to the alleyway. Your eyes darted around slightly as you made your way down the pathway. Eyes drifting to a specific brick wall that the two of you had met at.
“… huh?”
Ronin slumped against the wall, grinning as he noticed your steps.
“Hey darlin’… how are-“
He cuts himself off, his eyes drifting over your body with a furrowed brow and a small frown which was immediately replaced with a smile.
“Lazy day?”
“You can say that.”
Ronin obviously wasn’t satisfied with the answer, arms crossing as he approached and looked you dead in the eye. Noticing the redness, the puffy texture around them, and the fake smile you usually pulled on bad dysphoria days with a subtle grunt.
“What’s wrong?”
You shift a bit, rocking on the heels of your feet as you shrugged slightly and looked away. Your brows furrowed a bit as he leaned to meet your facial level.
“Nothing… just a bad dysphoria day.”
Immediately, he scowled. His arms suddenly wrapping around you in a comforting hug as he whispered nothing but affirmations to you. It made all the pent up emotions in your body spill out onto the floor. Soft sobs and quiet chokes escaping as you reciprocated the hug and sobbed into his chest.
“I’m not normal, why can’t I be normal…”
Ronin sighs, pressing a gentle kiss against the top of your head. His warmth, inviting and comforting as he whispered into your ear.
“Were we ever normal?”
#killer chat#killerchat#killer chat ronin#killer chat vn#visual novel#cc x reader#reader#x reader#one shot#oneshot#gender dysphoria comfort#trans man reader#trans reader#transgender dysphoria blues#lolita fashion#sweet lolita#gender dysphoria#Lolita aesthetic reader#reader insert#male reader
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ok im watching act 3 again to write down my questions and see if anything makes sense this time
edit im 2 eps in this got long as FUCK kjchgxhi come talk to me!!!!! im screeching into the void!!!!!!! americans wake up look at my post!!!!!!!! say everything to me!!!!!!!!!
why are we introducing time travel alternate universes into this story
where did the other ekko go, was he in Our ekkos universe/body or just out of commission, bc that makes no sense i think, if they didnt switch then wheres the ✨symmetry✨
do you think that skye had anything to do with them figuring out the cleaning flowers thing in the AU? and is viktor dead? and jayce in jail? banished? i wonder where skye went here i hope shes living her best not in love with a gay guy life
where the FUCK was the Original-AU heimerdonger when he got bodysnatched by the Our version? they do still call him professor but in Our version he just recently got kicked out of the council so would he still be just freeloadin around zaun at that point in the AU? was he ever councilor?
can everyone on my screen Please stop hurling their guts out from timetraveldisease
if theres no hextech and no anomaly in the AU reality then how did it throw them in it in the first place
ekko is smart but if he was smarter hed stay around to research what needed to happen to make zaun work in this version and save himself time figuring it out from the groundup back home, i think
but also what the fuck COULD have possibly happened to make it so different CUZ LIKE- ok the little flashback bit with vi dying in jayces house- the gang is wearing the same clothes as in Our version, so that would probably indicate that THAT zaun was also in the same state as Our ""original"" version too? right? no? i mean i would say they did put emphasis on clag n mylos clothes being different and more piltovian or whatever idk maybe im onto nothing WAIT NO BECAUSE CLAGGOR WAS MAKING THE DAMN FLOWER TO CLEAN THE POLLUTION SO IF THATS STILL THERE THEN IT COULDNT HAVE BEEN RESOLVED THAT MUCH EARLIER HERE RIGHT
also what the fuck had to be different exactly for enforcers to bust the kids after blowing up a building and not chuck them all in stillwater this time around? did they really care that much about vi dying? was that really the inciting incident for zauns inclusion? marcus? fucking MARCUS marcus? marcus "im gonna bury the lot of you" "deals with the devil to get a 14 yearold put in jail for life"* marcus sees a zaunite girl dead (after breaking into a piltover home and wrecking it) and just goes "aw :c" ? the council of rich businessfucks like salo whod do everything they can to maintain the status quo? is One Dead Kid (still the name of my nonexistent band) really all it takes this time? am i too tough on these people am i dumb if id like some elaboration on how that whole story went or
*to be honest i. dont really get what that Deal thing with silco was about in the first place
wheres Scar aaaat show me my guyy whERES VIKAAA
how did the shimmer story end up in the AU because IF the main change here is vis death then i could believe that silco WAS still already on track with beginning the production at that point if of course singed is also in the same position as Originally
is there a universe where that hammer lands on jayjays head and ends him right there
did silco forgive vanvan before or after zaun gets their "win" in the AU? because my bet is DEFINITELY after
ALSO how the fuck in a city like piltover did they not renovate jayces blown up flat after fuck knows how many years, at LEAST 3 (id wager at least 7 but thats just me so whatever) like city of progress who?? is it just there as like a cautionary tale??? did they put up a lil plaque for jayce after he kild himself?? they just boarded that shit up tho there was nobody there?? why did they leave it like that idk
WHY did heimerdeimer die???? DID he die?? why did he DIE?????? what happens to the AU-Original hongerdonger??? you couldnt have just waited 10 minutes and have powder do allat?? she trusted us right? maybe not
why WAS bonking viktor in the head with the zdrive the answer to our problems
powder knew what she was doing with that innovators cum petition sign right
WHAT the FUCK was that mylo claggor moment like am i inSANE OR WAS THIS SUS AS HELL also (man rapping) put some FUCKING RESPECT on stromaes name
how DID rizzard viktor stop being purple actually. god i still hate that reveal im not smart but i refuse to believe that was good writing
what happened to put that rock in jayces wrist? it wasnt a process it was viktor doing it in a split second why did that need to happen? so he wouldnt lose it? hunh?
no because WHAT IS AMBESSAS FUCKING GOAL HERE IN THE END
does she want kino back? whAT DO YOU WANT WOMANNNN
did that princess girl that got her head sliced off by bessa in the first season actually have anything to do with anything in the end or not cuz im just confuzzled
how does he know that
what does that mean
how does SHE know THAT
what does THAT mean
does loris have the same accent as vik??????
where the fuck did that ginger binch come from in the first place is she from piltover or noxus if shes from piltover what did ambessa give her and when
Neither of them would say ANY of this shit
wonder what vi would say if she saw this conversation before her and cait decided to pork
im just gonna choose to believe she was in there for like 5 hours so her labrador attention span just reset and she chilled out about jinx (actually ykw i guess im willing to believe at this point she doesnt really care that much if jinky offs herself or not)
what the FUCK ARE these goddamn doll puppet thingies viktor makes why are they LIKE that why is THIS the theme here (because orianna and Plot) (but like dyouknow what i mean)
what the fuck was the point of Skye Young as a character in this entire story other than a Gaydar Jammer. with all respect to skyvik stans but like. what is it.
lmao you abandoned them much before that guys
we stan a I Gave You Food And A Roof Why Are You Sad You Ungrateful Ingrate queen
it REALLY DOESNT DOES IT JGHCCGHIBC
why DID skye die again? they wouldnt have just? integrated? again? or smthn? why is this a one-passenger ride all of a sudden? we already got a hivemind thing goin? whatsup?
#arcane#arcane 2#arcane season 2#arcane season 2 spoilers#viktor#viktor arcane#jayvik#caitvi#jinx#jinx arcane#jayce talis#skyvik#arcane critical
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Within the past week one of my best friends who I've known since the 5th grade got engaged to her high school sweetheart who is also one of my dear friends
And I became obsessed with a Finnish singer/rapper who should've won Eurovision
23 this a wild fucking age
#on the one hand i know my friends are outliers and most people nowadays dont get engaged at 23#on the other hand ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh#nothing makes you question yourself and your ability to find love quite like someone youve know for half your life getting engaged#i panicked and joined match dot com only to find out its straight as hell#so straight that it lets me say im nonbinary but the only lets me select to show my profile to people who are interested in men OR women#at least ive got käärijä's music in my life now#cha cha cha playing on repeat constantly and ive started listening to his other stuff#oops all bangers#pine throws thoughts into the void of tumblr
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I Know What I Said
Quackity x reader (any pronouns)
Please send in requests!! I’m aching in my bones for things to write please please please
“I’m not looking for anything right now.”
The words repeated in your mind day and night, gripping and tugging at your heart. You’ve wanted to admit your feeling to Alex for the past few months after coming to terms that they wouldn’t just go away on their own. You’ve know him for over a year now, and the feelings only keep growing stronger. “The worst he can say is no,” is what your friends kept telling you, but he’s already said the worst thing in your opinion.
“I’m not looking for anything right now.”
You thought you’d bring up the topic of dating in general to him and try to gauge his feelings before admitting your own first. Kind of just beat around the bush. You thought maybe he’d just come out and admit he had a crush on you and then you could easily slip in how you felt about him too. Or maybe he’d pull the old “well my friend has a crush on their close friend they’ve known for a while but he just doesn’t know how to confess without ruining their friendship” and you could respond with “well he’ll never know unless he confesses, right?” and then he’d confess his feelings and turn out to be the “friend” who wanted to confess the whole time. Just like in movies and fanfics, right? Right? Wrong.
When you brought up the topic he went into a full rundown of how he just doesn’t see himself dating anyone anytime soon because he’s just so busy with his career right now and blah blah blah. As soon as he started talking you had just tuned it all out. His voice was drowned out by the voice in your head telling you to pull it together and choke down the icky feeling in your chest. The unrequited feeling. The only part of his entire response you heard loud and clear was the part you keep hearing play over and over in your head.
“I’m not looking for anything right now.”
Well shit. What do you do now? Respond with a chuckle and a “haha yeah me either”? Cut him off and tell him that he’s wrong and that you’re what he should be looking for? Admit your feeling regardless? Your thoughts were cut off by him asking you the question right back. “Sorry I feel like I really went on for a while. I didn’t mean to unload all that on you. Anyway, what’s your opinion on dating stuff?”
He asked the question so simply like he had no idea why you had asked him in the first place. “Umm,” you started, “well I mean yeah I guess I can see where you’re coming from. I guess I’d feel the same way if I was in your shoes. I don’t know. I guess for me dating is just like something I’m ready for now in my life. Im kind of tired of being single honestly, but hey, you know at least I’ve got you around, right?”
Alex grinned at the end of your last sentence. “Yeah, of course! I’ll always be here as your best friend so you don’t have to feel like a loner,” he chuckled. “But hey, you know if you’re trying to look for someone I’ll be the best wingman to ever walk this earth. And if anyone starts giving you shit or mistreating you, send em to me.” He turned from you and started throwing punches at the air and you couldn’t help but throw your head back in laughter. Alex was such an amazing friend to you and you started to wonder if wanting him as more than a friend was too much to ask in the first place. You were already lucky enough to have him care for you on a friendship level. The words still plagued your mind regardless.
“I’m not looking for anything right now.”
It’s been over a month since that happened and you continued to hang out with Alex like normal. You tried so hard to push your feelings for him down and appreciate the friend you had in him. The two of you had been hanging out all day and at the end of the night, he offered to drive you back home. The car ride to your place was more quiet than usual; void of loud music and laughter. It had been a long and eventful day and you were both exhausted from all you had done that day.
Alex pulled the car up to the front of your place and you reached to the floorboard of the car to grab your things and tell him goodnight before getting out. Before you could unbuckle your seatbelt, Alex’s voice broke the silence.
“Hey. I just…can I tell you something?”
“Uh yeah sure,” you responded as you placed your hands back in your lap and turned your body to better face him in the car.
He looked down from your face to his cup from the fast food restaurant you both ate at earlier as he played with the straw. “I lied. I lied to you and I’m sorry.”
You were too confused to respond as your mind raked through all of the things he could’ve possibly lied to you about.
He started up again, “I know I..well when we talked before…fuck like I didn’t mean to really say-“
“Alex spit it out. You’re making me nervous,” you said in a half speaking and half laughing voice trying to cover up the waver in your voice. Your fingers were already toying with each other as you tried to ease your nerves for whatever was to come.
“y/n I know this is gonna be awkward and I’m so sorry but I should’ve said it then and I’ve been making myself sick trying to think of a time to tell you this.” He brushed the pieces of hair back that were falling over his eyes as he finally looked back up to you. “I know I told you before that I wasn’t really looking for anything but the truth is that I’ve actually been falling for you. So hard. And before you interrupt and ask me why I said what I did, shit, I don’t know. I just..I just freaked out because I wasn’t expecting you to just ask me that out of nowhere.”
“Alex, Im sorry I didn’t mean to-“
“No please don’t apologize I should’ve just owned up to it and told you then because I really and I mean really wish I had. It’s been gnawing at me so bad that I didn’t take the opportunity to tell you. You honestly make me kinda nervous ever since I realized I wanted something more than friends with you.” His eyes dropped from yours again and went back to playing with the plastic straw.
“I make you nervous?” You could help but grin as you said it. You couldn’t believe he actually admitted to being nervous around you.
“Yeah yeah yeah go ahead and make fun of me, whatever, I knew I should’ve left that part out,” he scoffed as he rolled his eyes and sat back into his seat.
“No I’m glad you told me. I think it’s cute.”
“Oh so you think I’m cute?” He sat up straighter in his chair and smirked. “So you like me?”
You rolled your eyes at his sudden comeback in confidence after all the nervous toying with his straw he was just doing moments ago. He always ate up any little compliment you’d given him and you hated to admit you loved it.
“Yeah honestly I’ve had feelings for you for a while, and if you must know, I was actually trying to confess to you back when I asked your opinions on dating but wouldn’t you know, someone cough cough shut me down before I could. Mr. I’m not looking for anything right now.” You said the last part with finger quotes as you playfully rubbed what he said into his face.
He reached up and lightly smacked your finger quotes out of the air while trying to make an obviously forced angry face. “You should’ve just said it anyway. We could’ve been going on a date today and not just hanging out as friends. And then I could’ve kissed you goodnight when I dropped you off,” he wiggled his eyebrows as he said the last sentence.
Your face already started heating up. You knew exactly how a lot of your days spent together could’ve gone if you two had already been dating by this point. You practically thought about it every time you hung out together and every time you laid your head down on your pillow at night.
This time, you were the one to break the silence. “I mean, we still could,” you said quietly in the darkness of his car. “Only if you want to I mean I know we both just now told each other how we feel but I’m okay with-“
Your rambling was cut off with his lips shutting you up. It was just a peck, but as he pulled his head away you instinctively reached up to pull him back in. It was just a series of small closed-mouth kisses, but it was more than you could’ve imagined receiving from him just 15 minutes ago.
You pulled away from the kiss but kept your face close to his as your eyes scanned his. “I can’t believe you lied to me,” you whispered through a smile in the darkness.
“I’ll make it up to you, baby, don’t worry,” he whispered back as he closed the distance between the two of you again.
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