#im thinking about starting to write a little something something

[glubglubgurgle]

stuck bunnies

xaviermc where your vibrating egg gets stuck and only your helpful neighbor xavier could save you

pairings: xavier/unnamed afab [mc/you]

tags: smut, shameless smut, neighbors, stuck vibrators, he helps you hehe, DRY HUMPING, fingering, p and v sex, kissing, praising, jealous xavier, charlie mentioned, sex confessions, drunk in luv hehe

word count: 7k

a/n: first part to stuck vibrator series !!!!! YIPPEEEEE !! i hope u guys enjoy, no beta but i worked hard to pump this out before i leave for my tip, thanks for the excitement shown for this series! im excited to write more eheh

pings!: @rurushow @straykidslvr @mcdepressed290 @otomegamesforlife @liz9898 @cherriesinoctober @dummiebunny @cecxliia @rikissaurus @ophelia-ophelian @youkoden @zaynetism @auroranavi [IT WOULDNT LET ME TAG SOME OF U TT IDK HOW TUMBLR WORKS TT]

CROSS POSTED TO AO3

“You need to get laid, girl…” Tara said to you before taking another sip of her martini. She scanned the bar, surely looking for a proper suitor for you.

You sighed, following her gaze. “I do…but I don’t know about a one-night-stand. I want to at least know them or something.” You looked back at her and she already had her tarot cards in hand, shuffling them. “No way your tiny purse fits that…where the hell did you pull those cards out from?” You gaped at her.

“Hush. You’re looking for love, and I’m trying to help you.” Tara continued to shuffle the cards more before fully facing you. She pulled the card from the top and placed it on the bar, hovering it face down for a moment before flipping it over. She gasped.

“What? What does it say?” You panicked, looking at the random card with a large goblet being held that seemed to have water flowing out of it. Despite having had your cards read at random, multiple times, the meanings have never stuck with you.

“You like Xavier.” Tara smirked at you.

Your ears felt hot and you scowled. “What? N-no! What are you talking about?” You push her shoulder playfully. “The card does not say that.” You huffed.

“Nooo, but your face says it all whenever he talks to another girl at the academy!” She giggled, glancing back at your card. “Hm…but judging from this, I think you’ll have some good luck in the future with your silly crush…hm, it might be a little bit of a bumpy road buuut, it seems kind of positive!” She shuffled the deck again.

“You think he knows?” You asked her, chewing on your lip. It was very much true that you were into your work partner. Not only was he your partner and friend, he was even your upstairs neighbor. Xavier was everywhere, but he still wasn’t close enough for you. Although at times you thought there was the start of something, he would disappear at times and it would feel like you were back at square one. Even if you two were partners at work, he had higher strength levels and clearance than you, which meant he would be put on a lot of solo missions. 

Tara snickered, pulling another card and placing it face up besides the other one. “You’re so obvious…but who knows? I have a hard time reading that guy, sometimes. He has been to more employee dinners after you got home wasted that one time…So at least we know he cares about you!” She looked at the card and then slyly smirked at you. “I think you’ll be getting luckyyy soon.” She wiggled her eyebrows.

You looked at the card, a queen-like woman sitting on a throne. You cocked your head up at her as she ordered two tequila shots. 

“One more shot!” She screamed.

One became two. And then another. And then you were stumbling on your way home. You put Tara on a taxi to her place and texted her roommate that she was on her way. Since you ate a lot while drinking, and since you were a pretty good drinker, you weren’t as drunk. It was still hard to walk a straight line but it was manageable. You stopped by a convenience store on the way for a sports drink and then sat outside in the cool night air to sober up even more. Your body felt warm from the alcohol, despite your dress revealing a lot of skin. 

A hand reached out to the bottle you were struggling to open. “What are you doing out here?” You hear a familiar voice ask. 

You looked up after flinching at the sudden interaction. Xavier. He was wearing a gray hoodie and matching sweatpants. His fluffy hair had tufts sticking out as if he had just rolled out of bed. He easily opened the bottle before handing it back to you. 

As you grabbed the drink from him with a nod of appreciation, you took a sip before answering. “I was just coming back from the bar with Tara.” You took another sip, looking away from him. Your cheeks burned as he stared down at you. The alcohol felt like it was giving you another round of being drunk, your head was spinning and your heart was racing. 

He put his hand on the top of your head, turning you back to face him before letting go. Xavier looked like he was studying you. You saw his eyes roam at your outfit and you swore the tips of his ears turned pink, but you quickly brushed it off as the cold air’s doing. “You were walking home alone?” He crossed his arms, as if to judge you, and then pointed his chin upwards while looking down at you with a slight tilt.

Another sip of your drink, the cool liquid sending a small shiver up your spine as it contrasted with everything else feeling hot. “It was just me and Tara, she was a lot drunker than me so I put her in a cab…I’m fine. Just a bit wobbly.” You answered sheepishly, a small giggle bubbling out of your throat. “Was I supposed to find a guy at the bar to take me home instead?” You cocked your head at him, taking another sip. You had no idea where the sudden confidence came from, maybe the cards from earlier made you want to test the waters. 

His jaw clenched slightly. “Is your phone broken?” 

The question threw you off and you looked down at your lap where your phone was, confused. “N-”

“So, why didn’t you just call me?” He sighed, looking away before looking back down at you.

Another shiver, this time from his annoyed demeanor. It should have been a little upsetting, but you were quite honestly turned on. The way his blue eyes darkened when he was upset. It’s a sight you saw often when you came back from a solo-mission bruised and battered. You grasped at every shred of worry he showed, letting it feed into your hopes and delusions. Still, you couldn’t find an excuse.

He sighed again, his arms crossing and his fingers gripped at his sweatshirt, slipping it off. His shirt came up with his sweater for a second, his bare abdomen flashed you and time seemed to slow down. You couldn’t help but stare. Each crease and crevice of his muscles almost made your mouth water, but you could feel the place between your legs get a lot warmer. You quickly looked away, blushing, hoping that he didn’t see you staring since his sweater covered his face. You screwed the cap back on the bottle and placed it by your side. Then his sweater was held out in front of your face. 

“Wear this. You’re shivering.” He motioned for you to take the sweater.

With a slight hesitation, you reached up to grab it from him. You couldn’t tell him that you were actually feeling really hot because of him. You thanked him before slipping it on. It smelled like it just came out of the wash and it felt really warm. You wanted to keep smelling it, but he was right in front of you. Surely he would think you’re some sort of pervert if you just sat there and sniffed it. The fit was larger than you and since he was so tall, it went past your dress even. Which wasn’t very hard considering your dress was short already. You stood up, a bit too quickly, and stumbled. 

His arms wrapped around your shoulders to steady you, “Hey…you’re still drunk.” His mouth was near your ear, his voice deep and you shivered again. You hoped your lacey underwear would be able to hold in how wet you were, because the proximity was getting to you more than usual. 

There was something about the Xavier in front of you that was making you more feral and needy. You were already in a drought as is. It’s been hectic at work with long hours, to the point that when you got home, you couldn’t even take care of your needs yourself. The last time you dated someone was back in college, and you were terrible at hooking up with strangers; in the sense that you chickened out before anything went further ever. 

You were so extremely sexually frustrated, and you wanted to get home to take care of it before you jumped him right on the street to confess. “Th-thank you.” You said, slightly panting from feeling his breath on your neck. You hoped he passed it off as your reaction to almost falling. You straightened yourself up and he dropped his arms, standing up straighter as well. You grabbed your drink from the bench and shoved your phone into the pocket of his sweater.

The two of you started to walk towards the direction of the apartment building you both resided in. 

“What was the occasion?” Xavier asked after a few moments of silence. 

Since he was normally the soft-spoken type, you have always been worried about yapping his ear off. You normally waited for him to make the first conversation move, yet besides that, the silence that fell between the two of you was comfortable. You shrugged, shoving your hands into the hoodie pocket. “Nothing really, just needed a drink after those spatial anomalies made it nearly impossible to rest for two weeks.” You let out a sigh while looking up at the night sky. The city was quieter, no random car alarms being triggered, no sudden screams from surprised civilians. “I’m glad I’m not too drunk though. It’s really nice walking with you on a peaceful night like this. You must be tired too, right? I barely saw you even though we're technically partners.” You tilted your head up at him, a small smile on your lips. 

He was already looking at you and your eyes met. A small blush formed on your face. The corner of his lip twitched and a chuckle escaped him. “Yeah, it’s been a few days since we last saw each other…are you sad?” A teasing smile was on his lips as he bent over slightly to meet eyes with you, still walking. “Is that why you drank?” The question was a joke, but it was the truth.

You loved being a hunter, it was all you ever dreamt about since you were young. Although there were times where you would get tired, yet whenever he was around, it would feel like you could work for longer. As cheesy as it was, he felt like sunshine. You just let out a laugh and playfully pushed his arm away, “Don’t be silly.” His arm felt firm under your touch. You’ve had to patch him up before so you weren’t too surprised, but it still gave you butterflies. You knew that under his soft fluffy exterior was a very strong figure. The heat felt strong again, on your cheeks and under your clothes. 

“Hm, you’re blushing. Are you still drunk?” He asked, stopping the both of you in your tracks. His hand came up to your face, the back of it touching your forehead. “Or…are you getting sick?” His eyebrows knitted together with a concerned look. 

Your eyes widened at the sudden touch as you stopped walking. You looked away from his touch and saw that you were already at the front of the apartment. “N-no! But we’re home!” You forced out a laugh, “I’ll take some medicine before I sleep, just in case.”  You ducked under his arm and in through the gate of the building, quickly walking to and through the front entrance. 

The elevator ride felt quiet, but it also felt way too long. He stood too close to you and you wanted him. All you could smell was him: detergent, spring, citrus…it was driving you insane. You squeezed your thighs together and looked down, letting out a sigh through pursed lips.

“Are you okay?” He put his hand on your lower back, making you jump slightly, but you hoped it wasn’t obvious. 

“Yeah,” you forced a laugh. “I think the alcohol is making me really tired or something.” You lied. Then the elevator opened on your floor. Thinking you were going to say goodbye, you finally looked up at him, but he stepped out. “Huh, this isn’t your floor.”

“Yeah, but it’s yours. It’s better if you pass out inside your home than the hallway. You never know if your neighbor is a creep.” He glared at the door closest to yours. 

You walked out, still confused. “Hm, I think the only people that live on this floor are that mom and her kid…and the new one! What was his name…?” You racked your brain trying to remember, suddenly dropping the question of Xavier walking you to your door. “Carl?”

“Charlie.” Xavier responded sternly. “And anyways, just because he’s a baker, doesn’t mean he’s trustworthy. I just would sleep better if I saw you enter your home, especially in this state.”

You hummed an acknowledgment, trying to not look too swayed. He was being so considerate while he was looking so domestic and hot, you wanted to pull him into your apartment and kiss him right there. Instead you managed to open your door and step inside, turning to face him again. “Thank you…for walking me home. I’ll treat you to hot pot next time! Or a drink!” You looked down and saw his sweater still on. You were going to reach under and take it off until he placed his hand atop yours.

“Don’t worry about it, just return it whenever. Sleep well. Goodnight.” He smiled at you warmly, making your heart do jumping jacks. He walked away and then stopped to face you again, “I’ll be expecting that free meal soon, though.” He smirked at you before heading to the stairs. 

“Goodnight!” You yelled back, hoping none of your neighbors heard. You shut the door and leaned against it, your heart racing a thousand miles. You made a mental note of not listening to anymore of Tara’s readings, it was making you more delusional and unstable around him. But you also thought that maybe you were just extremely horny, so you took a shower to get ready for bed. 

You didn’t plan on sleeping any time soon that night, you wanted to finally take care of yourself. It was your first day off and you needed to cum as soon as possible. After your steaming hot shower, you slipped on a large shirt that you normally slept in and ditched the underwear. And then you saw his sweater on your bed. Since no one was around to judge you, you brought the fabric up your nose. 

Xavier.

Images of him in the sweater, removing the sweater, holding you, and saying sweet words flashed through your mind and it was making your heart race and you started feeling your clit pulse as well. You slipped on the sweater again, feeling too warm but you wanted it. You walked over to the balcony doors and opened them to feel the night breeze. You normally touched yourself with the doors open, in hopes that he could hear you. It’s been many times since you’ve done it and since there had been no signs of any knowledge of your nighttime activities, you just do it out of habit and the breeze felt good especially after sweating all night. 

You walked towards your dresser drawer and cursed. The vibrator wand you normally used had actually died two weeks prior, and you’ve been meaning to buy another one. It completely slipped your mind once work picked up and now you were left with a dead wand. You groaned, sifting through the drawer until you found a small drawstring bag.

It was the gag gift that your other coworker Simone had given you for secret santa a year before. A small purple vibrating egg. It had a little rubber loop as a handle and a small remote. Despite sitting in your drawer for a few months, you clicked the on-button and the egg came to life. Nearly bouncing from the vibrations in your palm. You never used this type of toy before from fear of losing it inside of you, but you were so desperate to cum that you couldn’t be bothered to worry anymore. 

You turned the lights down and got into bed, setting the egg beside you. You dragged your hand in between your legs and put your fingers in your folds. You were already wet, despite just taking a shower, you were warm and pulsing. Your fingers pressed against your clit and a hissed breath left you through gritted teeth. “Fuck…” You grabbed the egg with your free hand while your other fingers rubbed circles on your own clit. You spread your legs further, lifting your hips up a little and planted your feet on the bed. You slowly inserted the egg into your entrance, the stretch wasn’t too much despite being inactive for years, but it was rather small anyways. You tried to push it further in, inserting your fingers with a moan. And then you clenched around it, squeezing it further in you. You tugged at the loop, making sure you can still take it out before grabbing the remote. 

You took a deep breath before hitting the on button. A low hum began, which felt more like a massage than anything. You were worried that it was too weak to help with your needs, but then you pressed it again and it slowly got stronger. There were ten lights on the remote, and you knew you needed the strongest mode to cure you. Your hips started twitching as you kept raising the intensity, and once you reached the maximum, your lower body got warmer. You set the remote down and started rubbing your clit in circles. Soft moans were spilling out of you, and your leg even began to shake. You adjusted his sweater on you so the neckline was up to your nose, inhaling his scent. You felt like a pervert, but there was no one to see so you couldn’t care less. The coil in your stomach grew tighter and tighter, your legs started shaking, and your breathing got heavier. To reach your orgasm faster, you thought of Xavier. You wished he was on top of you, his hands replacing yours on your heat, saying your name. “Fuck…ngh…Xavier, please!” You moaned out. It was the first time you actually moaned his name, but you were too busy to worry about him hearing you through the open balcony as you were chasing your high. 

Your hips gyrated against your own hand, the vibrations ripping through you and then you finally came. It felt like the egg was going to catapult out of you with the combination of how wet you were and how tight your walls were contracting against it. You looped your thumb against the hoop and tried to yank it out as you continued to orgaasm to relieve the liquids out of you. 

And then you felt a snap. You cursed and sat up, your orgasm still making its way through you and your new position made the vibrator move inside. The flimsy rubber hoop snapped off. 

You were so sensitive from having just come, and you reached for the remote to turn it off. The lights that were on were suddenly off, and you had a feeling there were even more problems. You pressed the off button and nothing. It was still vibrating inside of you and the panic made it seem like it was going even harder. You laid back down and took your fingers down into your entrance, hoping you could pull it out yourself. “Fuck! Ah!” You cursed as your fingers pressed against the egg, right into your most sensitive spot. The silicone body was slippery with all your juices coated around it, and you were losing hope. Another orgasm hit you like a truck as it was pressed against your g-spot, pushing you into overstimulation mode. You knew you could come ten times in a row in this state, and you were worried that you couldn’t control it. A string of curses lift your lips with moans in between, from pleasure and agony. 

Suddenly you heard a slam from upstairs, like a heavy piece of furniture fell on the ground. 

You ignored it as you had bigger things to deal with. You ripped your fingers out of yourself and rolled onto your stomach, pushing your ass up into the air as you buried your face into the pillow. Your body was shaking from the multiple orgasms, but the position felt like it was a little bit less pushed against your squishy spot. You wondered if there was anyone you could call that wouldn’t send you into years of embarrassment. You wished you kept the box for the toy to see how long the battery lasted, but you knew it would be at least an hour and you didn’t think you would survive that. Your last hope was Xavier, but…

Then, the doorbell rang. Once. Twice. And then multiple times. It was as if the person at the door was running from something. You pushed yourself up, getting to your feet, worried there was an emergency. Despite your watch not reading any fluctuations, it could have been something else. 

You wobbled your way to your front door, doing your best to ignore the egg vibrating inside of you. You pulled the sweater and shirt down to cover your naked bottom fully. Each step made you clench yourself, making it rub up and down your sensitive spot. You gripped at the walls and counters as you finally made it to the door. As you squeezed your thighs together, you fumbled with the locks and then turned the knob. 

The slight opening of the door was suddenly pushed further open from the outside.

Xavier.

He breathlessly said your name with concern laced through each letter. He was panting as if he had just run a mile, and his fingers were gripped on the door, looking down at you. His blue orbs were darker than usual as they searched your face for discomfort. Xavier raked his fingers through his hair, his black shirt lifting up as he raised his arm, revealing skin as his pants were low on his waist. You couldn’t help but stare and nearly drool. You felt your core get tight from arousal again, making it harder to ignore the buzzing inside of you. You wondered if he could hear it.

“Did something happen? I heard you..yelp. It sounded like you were in pain.” Xavier’s eyes looked around the living room, as if he was looking for signs of another person. 

You looked down, scrunching your face together as you tried to bite back the moans threatening to come out of you. You wanted to curl into a ball and die from the shame of the state he found you in, and the face that he definitely heard you. Even though that was your goal before, the fact that it came true made you burn inside. 

Desperation ate at you. “Fuck…” You cursed through gritted teeth. You pulled him in by his shirt and pressed him against the door to close it. You caged him in by planting your hands against the door by each side of his waist and looked at him. Your eyebrows were knitted together and your lower lip trembled. “P-please help me…I- ngh.” You stopped your sentence. The eye contact he held with you and the proximity of his body was enough to push you over the edge. You sank down to the floor by his feet, getting on your knees, as you tried to hold in your reaction as much as possible.

“What’s wrong?” Xavier asked, confused. He squatted down to meet you, his hand reaching under your chin to tilt up to look at him. “Use your words so I can help you.” The control he had was in heavy contrast to the control you had completely lost. Your thighs trembled and you felt your juices leak down your thighs. His words and the stern delivery made you bite your lip.

“Vibrator…ngh.” You panted, your hand reaching up to squeeze his arm. It was an attempt to focus on something else. “It’s stuck inside me…please help. I can’t-” You gasped as you clenched again, moving the egg inside of you. “I can’t get it out…” Your face burned with embarrassment. 

In no time, he was up on his feet and he scooped you up in his arms. His arm hooked under your knees, and he carried you bridal style over to your bedroom. “Are you okay…with me? I have to reach inside of you.” 

You could feel his eyes burning into you and you hid your face in his shoulder, gripping tightly on the fabric of his shirt. The position he carried you in pushed the egg inside of you and you were sure he could feel the vibrations from your legs. “Please…if it’s okay with you?”

“Of course.” He said instantly, placing you on the bed. “Let me wash my hands really quickly.” 

You felt him leave and you rolled yourself back onto your belly, assuming that it would be easier if you weren’t facing him. You heard the water run in your bathroom and then stop before the footsteps were close to you again. You lifted your ass into the air again, waiting impatiently for him to get it out of you. 

“I’m going to touch you now, okay? I have to move this up so I can see.” He said, playing with the hem of your clothing.

“P-please, just get it out quick.” You begged, slightly muffled by the pillow. 

The skin on your bottoms was suddenly kissed by the cool breeze from the balcony again, cooling the liquid gushing in between your legs. You heard his breath hitch and the warmth of his hand near your entrance as the other held onto one of your cheeks. “I’m going in…I need you to relax a little, if you can. Breathe properly.” His voice, which was usually steady, had a slight break to it. 

Uncertainty, you thought. Ignoring it, you moved your head to the side so you could take deep breaths, and then his fingers were inside of you. You could feel him push against the egg, and you twitched at his touch. You couldn’t help but moan. His long slender fingers were reaching areas you never could yourself, and two fingers instantly were stretching you even more as he tried to grab on.

“Fuck…you’re really tight.” Xavier said tensely. You could have sworn the grip on your ass got even tighter. “And you’re so wet…I’m having a hard time getting a grip on this thing. Can you take another finger?” 

His words felt so dirty and it turned you on even more, you ended up gushing around his fingers, fluttering your walls around the egg and now him. “Ngh..fuck, fuck, fuck! I’m sorry.” Tears pricked your eyes as you came on the spot, in front of him with him inside of you. “Please, do whatever. I can’t do this anymore, Xavi, please.” 

A breathy chuckle left him, “You’re driving me crazy, you know?” He said. Another finger inserted you. “Too…tight.” His hand rubbed circles on your lower back. “Relax…breathe.” 

As you did your best to follow orders, you could feel him go into you deeper, spreading his fingers wider into your pussy. “Haah…” You sighed, trying to maintain your composure or what little left you had of it.

“Good girl…I almost…” He then seemed to have a good grip of the egg and then slowly pulled it out. “Got it.” His fingers, along with the egg left you with a squelch and you felt liquid drip out of you.

The room was filled with sounds of your heavy breathing and the louder buzz of the egg which was then silenced. You assumed he found the button on it. You fell onto your side, catching your breath. The multiple orgasms were taking a toll on you, and your mind was clearing up. The chain of events were replaying in your head and you started crying from embarrassment. You felt yourself being lifted by your shoulders and your head being placed onto his chest. 

“Hey…why are you crying?” Xavier asked, rubbing your arms, wrapping himself around you. 

You shoved your face into his chest. “I’m so embarrassed…you were just inside of me because I had that thing inside of me.”

“It’s okay. I’m glad it was me that you asked for help…if it was someone else at the door would you-” He started which you quickly looked up to deny.

You shook your head, meeting his eyes with your own teary ones. “I would rather die. I think I feel safe around you. You always help me when I need it, I knew you could help me. I don’t think I’d want anyone else to see this, either.” You explained, determined to let him know that you weren’t open to just anyone.

Xavier looked at you with wide eyes before his shocked face melted into a warm smile. “So, don’t be embarrassed. I know you were kind of stressed out just now, but I think you look really good. You sounded really good too.” His face lowered down to yours. “I’ve been wanting to kiss you all night, even before this. Since earlier.” His dry hand came up to your cheek, his thumb pulling your lower lip down softly. “Can I?”

You didn’t answer. Instead you pushed yourself up to meet his lips with a groan. While your lips were attached to his, you changed your position so you were on your knees on the bed, your body fully facing him. The kiss was so soft and warm, it was more than you imagined it would be. You gasped as he nibbled your bottom lip and he took his chance to explore you further. The feeling of his tongue mingling with yours made you light headed. Your hands moved to his thighs and then one roamed up from under his shirt.

He pulled you into his lap, making you straddle him. 

“W-wait, I don’t have anything on. I’m going to stain y-” You tried arguing.

“Don’t care.” He stated before kissing you again, his hands held your hips and pushed you to sit on him fully. Your heat crashed into the bulge in his pants that you just noticed, making you moan loud into his mouth. Each of your sounds being swallowed by him and his groans. “Fuck…” He said against your lips, tilting his head to deepen the kiss.

Your hands explored underneath his shirt, your hips mindlessly grinding against him despite how sore you felt from the vibrator earlier. Your fingers traced each bump of his muscles and grazed against his nipples. A whimper left his throat, making you buck into him from surprise. “Take it off…” You tugged at his shirt. “W-wanna see you.” You begged as you pulled away. 

He smirked at you, his lips looking red. You couldn’t tell if it was leftover lipstick from you or just from the intensity of kissing. Xavier instantly slipped off his shirt.

You were about to take your tops off, but his hands grabbed yours. “I like you in my sweater.”

Xavier kissed your jaw and then your neck. Peppering more kisses until he reached your ear. “Were you thinking about me?” He asked, just above a whisper. “I heard you…” He held your hips and rolled himself up into you, groaning. “...saying my name. It drove me crazy. You never did that before.”

You gasped. “You heard me- mmmph. You heard me before?” You asked, shocked and embarrassed.

“Isn’t that why you opened your doors? Who else did you want to hear you like that?” His grip tightened on you, almost bruising, bringing you down to grind more on his clothed length. “It’s just me, isn’t it? You feel so good, even just like this. You already came, but you’re still soaking me.” He groaned into your ear, sending a shiver down your spine and making you moan in return. 

You squeezed your eyes shut, your knuckles turning white as you held onto his shoulders for dear life. All his words made you flutter your walls around nothing. You were just begging to be empty earlier and now you couldn’t help but want to be stretched out by him again. His heavy breathing, soft moans, and dirty words were pushing you closer and closer to another orgasm. If he blew air into your ear, you swore you wouldn’t have to keep grinding down on him just to come, he could unravel you without even touching you. “J-just you, Xavi…I like you so much…wanted you to hear me and like me too.” You took a sharp inhale as you felt his clothed tip rub against your clit just right. 

“Fuck- ahng. Why didn’t you say so earlier, baby? I could’ve helped you out all those other times.” Xavier then repositioned you to lie on your back before climbing on top of you, reconnecting the two of you at the hip. The weight of his cock felt heavier as he was on top of you. Even through the pants you could tell it was big. The light gray fabric turned dark, the wet spot large as well from you constantly dripping onto him. “What if that- shit…” He cursed as he slowly  trailed his clothed tip in between your wet, naked folds. He lifted the sweater you were wearing up, resting it above your belly button so he could admire you more. His eyes looked blown up and glassy from the arousal, you swore his pupils covered every centimeter of blue. “If that baker heard how you sounded….fuck. He doesn't even know that you can’t even remember his name,” he let out a dark, mocking chuckle. His hands roamed along your thighs, up your stomach, and played at the hem of the pushed up sweater. “Doesn’t even know how pretty you look, writhing underneath me, right now. How good you feel…and I’m not even fucking you….” 

You arched your back up from the mattress, attempting to have his hand ride up further to touch you more. You shook your head, “W-wanted only you to hear me…please, touch me.” You were gonna babble, you knew it. You grabbed his wrist that was on your stomach and pushed his hand under the sweater, to touch your breasts. Your nipples felt hard and peaked, you needed him to touch them. As if he read your mind, his fingertips grazed them, making you stutter a moan out. Your other hand played with the waistband of his sweatpants. “Can you fuck me? Please, Xavi? I want you inside me. Please?” You begged, your eyes looking up at him, half-lidded and blurry visioned. 

“God, you’re driving me crazy.” He groaned,  rubbing his cock against your core once more before pulling away slightly, which earned a whine to leave your lips at loss of contact. Xavier panted as he pulled his pants down slowly. “Are you sure? I don’t know if I can hold back…or even last long.” He looked around. “Do you even have a condom?”

You didn’t know whether to shake your head or nod profusely as you had multiple answers. “D-don’t care, birth control. Want you to cum inside.” Your brain was mush, desperate to cum again with him inside. “Been dreaming of this, Xavi. Don’t- ahhh!” He rolled your nipped in between his index and his thumb, interrupting you as you arched your back again, squeezing your eyes shut. “Don’t you dare hold back on me.” You managed to grit out. 

“Look at me.” He commanded and your eyes shot open again. He got up from the bed and pulled his pants down before scooting back in between your legs. His cock was an immense size. Large, leaking, thick. You’ve never seen one this big before, and although you wanted to be more nervous, you were too sex fogged to care. He wrapped his hand around his length, pumping himself without much care as he looked at you intently, his jaw tensed and his eyes were full of sex. You never knew what bedroom eyes were until you saw him. His other hand slid up your thigh again, the trail electrifying. He then pushed the sweater up to rest above your tits, tucking it under your chin. “Fuck, you’re so beautiful. I could cum just looking at you…” Xavier said, lust dripping from his words as he continued to pump himself. 

You could watch him jerk off and cum right then and there too. Knowing that you were the reason was enough to make you whine. “Please, Xavi…”

He dragged his now bare tip in between your equally bare folds. You twitched at the touch and lifted your hips to quicken his proximity to your entrance, but his hand held you down. “Ah, ah…be patient for me, my star.” He hissed, yet his words didn’t match his actions as he already lined himself up to your leaking hole. “You’re already so wet, I think I could just slip right in…ahh.” He teased the tip in, pushing it in and out. The stretch was already bigger than you imagined, but you were so turned on, there was no room to be in pain. 

You moaned and whined, begging for more. A mantra of pleases and curses left your lips as he finally slid more of himself in with a groan.

“Fuck…” He groaned as he was halfway in, heaving. “You’re still so tight…won’t ever get enough of this.” He slid further in. “This is just for me, right? You’re mine now, aren’t you?” His fingers had a bruising grip on your thighs, keeping your legs on his hips, opening you up to him. “Tell me…” He commanded as he slid further.

“A-all yours. Just for you…take- holy fuck…take all of me. Whenever…whereever…” You babbled, your head dropping back onto the pillow, your gaze moving the ceiling as you felt him even deeper than before. “F-fuck me.”

Xavier leaned over as he bottomed out with a gasp, his hand moved to the back of your head, forcing you to look at him and where the two of you were connected. “Keep looking at me, baby. Need you to see the mess we’re making.” The skin around where the two of you met was glistening. Either with sweat, cum, slick…you couldn’t give a fuck. He was finally inside of you. Even if you wanted to look away, your eyes were glued. Either at his dick or his eyes, it was the only thing you could focus on. And then he started moving. “Shit, you take me so well. I’m the only one who can make you this wet…can’t you hear?” Loud squelching sounds came from him moving in and out of you, you could even see tiny splatters of liquid. “You’re so fucking wet, I think I’m gonna drown, but you’re still so tight…are you nervous? Or are you just a perfect fit for me? Relax a little baby…” He was turning such mundane words into the dirtiest sentences and it was driving you over the edge.

You couldn’t respond, all that was coming out of you when you wanted to was choked moans and whines. And the only word you could force out was his name. “X-Xavi…hngh…Xavie-r.” His eyes snapped up to meet yours and then he leaned down into a bruising kiss, teeth clashing and drool spilling at the side of your mouth. 

“Keep saying my name, I’m so fucking close.” He said against your lips before moving back again to watch him go in and out of you, you swore he drooled too. Then he licked his thumb and placed it on your clit, rubbing circles in a calculated manner. “Let me feel you cum around my cock like you did my fingers. So fucking pretty, I wanna feel you squeeze around me like that here too.” The pressure building was driving you crazy, nearly having you scream his name. You wondered if the entirety of Linkon could hear you. As if he heard your thoughts again, “Tell the whole city who you belong to, starlight.” He groaned, his thrusts turning sloppier by the second. 

“Xavier! G-gonna c-” You couldn’t even finish before you felt yourself spill all over his cock, spasming around him. You tried to hold eye contact, but couldn’t take the multiple sensations and you threw your head back, your hips stuttering as he continued to pound into you. You swore your back could have snapped in half with how far and fast you arched it up as you came.

“Right-fucking-there…holy shit.” He groaned and said in between thrusting into you. “Fucking…take it…” He groaned before spilling into you. It was hard to tell which warmth was his which was yours, but the of him cumming inside of you was enough to bring you to another quick and short second wave. “God…you’re going to drain me…” He panted, falling on top of you, still softly thrusting himself through his orgasm and yours. His lips latched onto your neck, leaving marks in between his breathy whines. 

He rolled the two of you over, still connected so you could rest on him instead of the other way around. Your head was on his chest, listening to his erratic heartbeat return to a more normal state as each minute passed by. The two of you were still heaving and still sticky. You could feel yourself leak around his softening cock. He finally let you remove his sweater as it was bunched on around your chest awkwardly, so you were fully connected in your purest, rawest form. 

You giggled, thinking about the tarot cards Tara pulled. 

“What’s so funny, starlight?” He rubbed your back softly, his chin on top of your head as he spoke.

“Just thinking that the stars are forever in our favor…” You mumbled, fully content with the night.

[dex0s]

PART FIVE OF WELCOME BACK AUTHOR

HAVE YOU EVER FUCKED AN SKELETON —Satoru Gojo X Male reader; WARNING — Jerry the skeleton dick? (magic), Gojo being a menace, public (your in a cube full of skeletions), step-brother, maybe a little unreal but Im writing about a unreal character so ha!, smut with no plot, bottom male reader

Word count: 1.5K

(A/N) -- I just want you to know that I listened to touch by katseye, smiled and singed my little heart out when rewriting this. And I brought back the old banner only because Satoru is king and he deserves the prettiest banner of them all. enjoy!

For as long as you could remember, you and Satoru were the honored ones—the strongest warriors, the ones everyone looked up to. He was Thing 1, and you were Thing 2. So how the hell did the two of you end up trapped in a cube?

“Hey now! It’s not that bad,” Satoru chirped, flashing that infuriating grin that somehow made him look like a mischievous child despite being a grown man.

You groaned, rubbing your temples. You had no idea how long you’d been stuck in this tiny, claustrophobic space, but sharing it with a childish man—your grown-ass brother—and a skeletons who apparently never learned to keep their hands to themselves was starting to wear on your nerves.

“If you’re really getting bored, you know I could always do something to distract you~” Satoru teased, wiggling his fingers like he was plotting mischief.

After a minute of tense silence, you decided you’d rather see what your brother had in mind than sit there feeling awkward or listen to him complain about why you were trapped in this ridiculous cube.

“Don’t worry about what I have in mind,” he said with a sly smile. “I just know we’ll both like this~”

You narrowed your eyes suspiciously, bracing yourself for whatever nonsense he was about to unleash.

Stuck sitting in Satoru's lap, you shiver as his cold, skeletal hands glide slowly up and down your arms. Each touch sends a chill straight through your skin, like ice water tracing your naked chest body before stopping at your nipples.

 You can feel him smiling against your neck, the curve of his lips brushing lightly over your skin, sending a tremor down your spine. Then, slowly, deliberately, he takes one of his fingers and trails it along your nipple piercing, rubbing them in a fast paced and pulling them. His cold fingers rubbing fast, frantic, almost desperate, as if trying to rip out the piercings.

“Mmm..Haa– Wait, your fingers are cold!”

Continuing to fondle your nipples, Satoru pulls up your arm, draping it over his neck. Moving his head closer to your chest, taking his tongue out at dripping his saliva all over you then moving his head back to where he can see you little fucked out face.

 “Hm? I can’t hear you over your moaning, Little brother~” He smiles with that blank, unsettling look like words are just sounds to him. It’s the kind of smile that stretches too long, too wide, as if he's enjoying this (which he is very much)

Arcing your back, your head falls back in between his neck and shoulder. “W-wait–Please!” you struggle in his hold trying to free yourself yet Satoru calm puts his forehead down and connects his and your together. Rocking you back and forth. Gripping your chest he squeezes hard, slipping his finger through the hole ring and doing whatever his heart wants. 

Satoru looks up and sees the little crowd of skeletons just watching. Waiting. Thinking for a moment, he gives a dark smile at them.

“Why don’t you join just instead of staring, hm?” Taking one of his hands from your chest moves it down in between your legs and spreads out your legs before locking them with his just in case you want to act up. 

Unbuckle your pants, yanking both your pants and undergarment. Flashing your cock out to the skeletons.

 “Look at what we have here” With a fake sad tone, Satoru pouts as if seeing you hard is a sad thing. “My poor little brother is hard and I can’t do anything about it (he says as he jerking you off), can you help him my friends.” Satoru moves his hand presenting your cock to the bony figures, as if your cock is a peace treaty. Glancing up you can see the creatures moving in closer, trying to move, Satoru locks both your legs and arms.

“H-Hold on now, you don’t want to do this” stumbling on your words as they reach your cock.  

One of the skeletons grasp your cock working on having your release in its hand. Another fondle your balls sacks moving under you and biting and pulling. The last one moving behind Satoru taking its hand(?) to play with your hole processing to push a finger and slowly adding more in your tight boypussy.

“CUMMING~ I’M CUMMING! PLEASE–”

Tongue out, eyes budging, your body moves on its own begging for your release.

Quickly Satoru swats away the hands like little flies before you can cum. “Hey! That's not fair you can’t cum, yet I barely touched you.” whing like a little bitch, Satoru lifts you up so he has enough that he can pull both his pants and underwear down. 

“I’m going to name you Jerry big fellow” Turning his head, Satoru thanking the skeleton behind you two, “You know I just have to give you a big thank you Jerry! I couldn’t do this without you (ignoring the other two) so you know what why do you fuck him with him hm?”. Quickly snapping out of whatever planet you were on. you budged out your eyes and, you give yourself whiplash from fast you turned your head.

“WHAT! No, no, no, no, no, What do you mean join! It doesn’t even have a dick–” throwing a hand over your mouth, Satoru smiles at ‘Jerry’ empathetically as if to apologize for what you said. 

Not paying attention, you don’t notice the way the skeleton moves in front of you grabbing both of your legs and putting them up on their shoulders. Moreover you feel something in between your legs grow and it is not your dick.

Bit by bit you look down and see something you would have never imagined. Jerry, the skeleton… has a tentacle cock, which is in fact big (maybe bigger than Satoru’s but we don’t want to hurt his ego now) and slimy.

Before you can fully comprehend on what is actually going on, you feel your little goryhole fill to the brim. 

‘This is way too big’ you think, being smashed down onto both of the cocks. You can only imagine how huge your hole has gotten. Satoru has a firm grip on your ass as both him and the skeleton have their fun with this “pussy” of yours. Jerry grads your face hard and shoves a tongue-like thing down your mouth.

“Ooh~♡ AH!” Ramming into you over and over, Satoru rolls over his tongue licking up and down your back. Pushing his hands on your stomach so both you and him can feel how deep they are. Shoving you back down again you feel something pop in you.

“FUCK ME♡~” pulling back from Jerrys mouth you arc your back turning your body into the letter “C”. Cumming down hard, you can feel it oozing out from your cock. ‘This is so wrong… but yet it feels so good♡” Rolling your eyes back, you let your tears be free. 

FWOP FWOP FWOP♡~

You can’t even feel your body due to how fucked out you are, taking both of the cock like a little slut.  you don’t even know how long you have been bouncing on the. “S-stop..p-please” begging for this to end and it looked like your wishes were coming true. You can feel both of them twitch inside you.

 “You feel it slut–God~, you feel that we are close don’t you” Satoru gazes up at you with a psycho look, jerking you back he forcefully pushing his mouth on your. Thrusting both his tongue in your mouth and cock in your “pussy”. You choke on your spit then crying out as you feel a warm liquid enter your body. 

You pick up that something is rising up your throat, Pulling away from Satoru you throw up at white substance, cum. Falling forward you grip onto Jerry’s rib bones.

“So is anyone up for round two?”

“Grrrr–”

“Ugh! You're so smart Jerry, I don’t even know why I asked!”

“I hate both of you…”

OUTSIDE THE CUBE

“They must be having so much fun in there,” Geto said with a slow, amused grin, his eyes fixed on the writhing, moaning cube. The sound of agony or perhaps twisted pleasure, seemed to echo faintly from within, drawing out his eerie sense of satisfaction.

Standing nearby, Jogo recoiled with a visible shudder. “Ugh… humans are absolutely revolting,” he muttered, his singular eye narrowing in disgust as he rolled it dramatically. “I swear, I need something violent to scrub this mental image out of my brain.” His voice rose in irritation. “I’m going to go fight Sukuna. That ought to help.”

Geto turned toward the irritated volcano-headed curse, chuckling softly. “Oh?” he said, lifting a hand in an overly cheerful wave. “Well, don’t let me stop you. Bye-bye now! I hope Sukuna gives you exactly what you’re looking for.”

Jogo growled low in his throat but didn’t reply, stomping off toward certain chaos, smoke rising in wisps from his simmering head. Geto’s smile lingered as he turned his gaze back to the cube, the grin growing just a bit wider.

part two? Jerry + Geto + Gojo + you= best sex?

[despairots]

# PHAINON … angst/happy ending !

phainon x gn!reader | the explanation for this was so corny but i was on cai and i stumbled upon a phainon bot. you like him but phainon likes the trailblazer (caelus in the bot) and he confronts you about it and and and im not gonna lie, i was like ts is a masterpiece hence the reason why im making this

cw: swearing, angsy/happy ending, slightly oblivious reader, male trailblazer, slight mention of a harem but the trailblazer dont fw any of them, jealousy, insecurities, dan heng + reader = found family, miscommunication, honestly it says happy ending but halfway through writing this i was like “nahhh leave it on a cliffhanger.” slight mention of kevin kaslana x reader, spelling mistakes, no i did not proof read this.

ever since you landed on amphoreus with both caelus and dan heng, you’ve realized how little importance you have to most people. caelus was an eye-catcher, a sight for sore eyes, and if you looked off to his companions, you’d realize why he was the only one worth watching.

it’s not like you cared or you were jealous, you just started noticing now. any time someone, needed help with something that could solve what you’re fighting for, they look at caelus. you don’t know if dan heng had noticed, but if he did, you can’t help but get mad at yourself for letting jealousy slip.

this doesn’t only imply to being helpful, it also implies how many people would tear down the sky for him. it’s funny when caelus is completely oblivious to their actions, or even if he was aware, he wasn’t interested. it never bothered you, really. it never hurt either, he was friend so you had no right to be mad at his unknown selfishness.

but the only time it did hurt, was when you realized the man you had fallen in love with…

…was in love with him.

you didn’t wanna believe it at first; how every gaze that was on you went to caelus when he’d brushed past you two, how he’d atleast bring his name up in one conversation between the two of you. before, you’d just laugh it off, thinking he was just talking nice so you wouldn’t tell caelus that phainon was shit-talking him.

it started off as straying farther from him, next, you’d stop responding with jokes and started answering with things that were necessary. after that, you stopped meeting his gaze, ignoring how much it hurt to distance yourself from him. you thought that maybe he’d forget about the connection between you two, that he’ll leave you alone.

but the one thing you know about phainon was that he was undoubtedly stubborn.

the both of you were hidden behind views, phainon leaning on a wall of okhema with a crossed arms and narrowed eyes that made you wonder if that was actually him infront of you. you knew this day would come, where you’d eventually have to face him. you’ve counted many times where you dodged a bullet by talking to him.

“you’ve been avoiding me.” phainon points out, getting to the point immediately. you tugged bits of your lips inside your mouth, chewing on the flesh, “is it… because of caelus?” you seem stiffen on the mention, betraying your own body.

phainon sighed, uncrossing his arms with a concerned look, “i’m sorry, i never meant to you hurt.” you shrugged, keeping yourself as calm as possible, “it’s fine, really.” turning to look at him, you felt your resolve crumble, “caelus is my friend, so are you. if it brings you both happiness, who am i to judge?” you scratched the back of your neck, turning your gaze somewhere else.

phainon’s frown deepened, for all the shorten times his known you, he hates it when you distance yourself from him.

you sighed, facing him this time with a steady look, “but now’s not the time to worry about feelings, let alone mine. we can worry about our personal matters later.” maybe if you shoved this conversation aside, it’ll never happen again. you don’t want it to happen again—matter of fact, you wished phainon wasn’t perceptive at all.

something in you made your soul feel more attached to him, something that you can’t shake off ever since you laid your eyes on him. were you, perhaps, destined to meet him? if so, were you destined to even have your feelings reciprocated? no time for trivial things anyway. you have more important things to deal with, like the flame reaver.

phainon couldn’t help but sigh, holding a hand against his forehead, “why are you saying that as if you mean nothing at all?” you gapped a bit, blinking in absolute disbelief. phainon’s eyes had you wavering a bit, the hurt lingering in his eyes that made you feel guilty for even distancing yourself.

it was just silence between the two of you, pain and regret lingering in the air. was he twisting your words just a bit? was he not understanding that the longer you stay near him, the faster your walls come down?

you sighed and broke the silence, covering your eyes in tiredness, “i’m not going to argue with you about this, phainon. just let this go, please.” you pleaded this time, keeping your posture straight despite the heaviness in your heart.

you saw the way his jaw tightened slightly, bothered by the attempts of you trying to brush this situation aside. phainon didn’t wanna believe that you regarded your feelings so little, not after you wear your heart on your sleeve. he hated seeing you so sadden, by him especially. phainon never meant to you hurt you, if you looked closer, listened harder—you’d hear his heart beats beating fo—

“i can’t let this go, do you really think i can? this isn’t some fleeting scab that’ll disappear as time passes, wounds don’t heal when you keep picking at them.” way too woe you with words, phainon… the vulnerability was there, laid flat out to you, expecting that you’ll do the same.

just for you to stand there with your guard up, “must you be so stubborn, phainon? you have my blessing with you and caelus, and somehow, that’s not enough?” you scoffed, acting snarky was a way to push him away right? you hated this conversation, you hated being confronted like this, you hated knowing that he was gonna hate you sooner or later.

“i’ll manage, phainon. i can get over it.” you turned on your heels to leave, not even gathering up the courage to look him in the eyes to say it.

phainon’s hand latched out, grabbing your wrist with such gentleness that made you grit your teeth, “get over it? you say that as if love is such an inconvenience for you?” his voice cracked, phainon’s next words quieter, “do i really mean so little to you?” you looked down at the hand holding you back, the softness of his voice making you heave a heavy breath.

“no, you don’t.” staring at the hand that held you hostage, you couldn’t help but feel bothered, “but it’s not me you want, and that’s fine. i’ve accepted it, why can’t you?” you snapped, snatching your hand back and giving him a narrowed look before quickly making your escape.

if maybe you stayed a little longer, you could see the yearning in his eyes…

it seemed so easy for you let things go, and the question is why? it’s simple; caelus was just far more charming than you were, more eye-catching. you were fine with it… well, as fine as a person be.

you wandered around okhema before calling it a night. heading back to the temporary home with caelus and dan heng. when you entered, caelus was snoring with drool in the corners of his mouth, dan heng looking up from his book and spotting the aching look on your face.

he sighed, the both of you on the balcony as caelus’s snores brought no comfort to your already irritated state. back hunched over the railing, hands covering your face, and a slight shake in your shoulders. dan heng was… unnerved to see you in such a state, you were always confident and ready for anything, so seeing you so depressed made him worried.

you were someone he could call a family, everyone on the express was, but you meant something more to him. seeing you in such distress made him curse lightly at the nameless hero, “just tell caelus.” you glared at dan heng through the cracks of your fingers.

“yeah? about what? ‘hey, caelus! did you know that the guy i have a crush on likes you more?’ how funny for you to even suggest that.” you groaned, staring at the abyss in front of you with a pointed look, “fuck… i’m so stupid, dan heng. why’d i think i had chance?” you buried your face back into your hands, voice cracking midway through your confession.

dan heng sighed deeply, folding his arms over the railing, “you’re not stupid. i didn’t say tell caelus, so he could fix it. i said it so you wouldn’t have to keep pretending you’re not jealous, that you feel jealousy weaving itself into your bones.” he explained, the silence from you speaking many things already.

“running away from him doesn’t solve anything, it makes everything harder to bare.” you hated how right he sounded right now, how wise he needed to be sometimes. “shut up..” you turned over your shoulder to see the sleeping caelus, completely oblivious to the tremor he causes. he was your friend, and you’re jealous of him… you’re so immature.

why’d it seem like you fighting over a toy that wasn’t yours in the first place?

staring down at the railing, you’ve thought about millions of possibilities where you never came down here, “i should’ve stayed on the express. i could’ve saved me the trouble, and…” you gestured to yourself, technically speaking about the mess inside you, “whatever this is.”

“caring hurts, stop blaming yourself for stuff that was out of your control.” he flicked your forehead, the only sign of affection he seems to know whenever it was the two of you. dan heng ignored the teary-eyed glare, “it just hurts… it hurts knowing the one i actually want, wants caelus.” you admitted, choking back on tears before fixing yourself and turned to dan heng.

“don’t tell anyone please, this stays between us.” he nodded, watching you retreat back inside and throwing your goat over caelus’s head to stop him from snoring before he wrestled the coat off in sleepy confusion; huh? what’s happening? are we getting ambushed? he managed to let out before returning back to his annoying snores.

the next morning, you woke up with caelus watching you sleep. backing up when you shot up, clenching your shirt where your heart was, “shit, caelus! why’d you just watch me sleep?” your heart beat seemed to calm down, caelus bursting out in laughter.

“what? it’s the first time you’ve seemed so peaceful. normally, you’re all…” he laid on your lap, pulling an exaggerated scowl that made you swat him away. dan heng could notice the way your hands tightened onto your blanket as you continued to listen to caelus’s dumb ramble. his eyes flicked up to your face, seeing the red in your eyes and how puffy it was.

maybe you should’ve stayed on the express…

[highway-143]

lucifer- choi san

genre: smut, mafia au, based on the "in your fantasy" mv

pairing: mob leader!san × mob member fem!reader

taglist: (ateez/enhypen taglist open: im not gonna tag anyone bc idk who wants to read ateez on my taglist 😭)

word count: 1.7k

now playing: in your fantasy - ateez

a.n- finally picked my ass up and started writing for other groups 😩😩 hope this is good ig lol... also can you spot the mv references? hehehehehe

tw: profanity, unprotected sex, public sex, maybe dubcon idk, sir kink, rough sex, posessive-ish san teehee, dacraphylia, exhibitionism, probably some form of voyeurism idk, probably more lol

⊹────── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──────⋆

"do you even get what's happening here?"

you were standing in front of san on the balcony, his hand gripping your biceps, squeezing just enough to sting. his face was contorted into furrowed brows and a grimace. something like disgust.

"do you understand who's here right now?"

the theater below was filled with the wealthiest of the wealthy, the people with the most power, anyone with influence.

and that meant san.

and for some reason, you.

how could mr. mafia go to a play without a woman on his arm and a glass of wine in his hand?

except that glass looked like it was goint to be crushed with how tight he was holding onto it.

"yes, sir." you mutter.

"really? then fucking act like it. this is not the time for you to act out of line."

you frown. "all i did was shake the guy's hand! how the hell is that 'out of line'?"

"oh my god, are you dumb?" his voice is getting louder now, and your eyes dart to the crowd only yards away. "you're mine. that's how it works here. he shouldn't be touching you. you don't touch anyone else. there's no telling what these men will do, especially when women and money are involved."

you scoff, and san drags you closer to him. close enough to where you can almost taste his his cologne, close enough to where you can see just a faint outline of a scar on his chest where his silk dress shirt cut so low it was almost sinful.

"you think this is dumb? you chose this, remember? you need this. need me. you'd be on the fucking streets if it wasn't for me. you know how this works."

"fine. i'll be good. your quiet little doll, right?"

he can practically smell the sarcasm radiating off of you. but he ignores it.

for now.

⊹────── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──────⋆

the second you set a heeled foot back in the ballroom, san regrets letting you go back.

he knows you're going to make this harder for him. he can tell in the way you sit when he pulls out your chair, how your posture is impeccable even under his gaze.

his jaw tightens when you laugh at something someone said.

you notice.

you weren't planning on stopping.

san catches your gaze during intermission, and he places a hand on your thigh.

he starts tapping.

long, short short short. pause. short long. pause. short long, short short. pause. long, short long, short. pause. long, long, long. pause. long, short. pause. long, short long, long.

balcony.

you hold back a smirk. barely. san can tell.

he hates the way you get up from your chair, making up an excuse about how you're "so sorry but i have to go to the restroom."

you climb the stairs alone, san acting like everything was perfectly fine while he was surrounded by people.

until he excused himself too.

you didn't know when he would join you on the balcony, but you were starting to wonder when the lights dimmed and the show continued.

you must have waited for a few minutes, watching the play from above while your heart pounded.

until you felt a hand on your waist.

and you knew who's it was.

"how's it going up here?" his lips are right by your ear. you can feel his breath on your neck.

"fine." you fake canfidence, but you're certian he can see right through you.

"yeah? but it didn't seem fine while we were down there, did it?"

you shrug. "i thought it was going well."

he's directly behind you, chest pressed against your back. "was it? i don't think it was."

"was i too loud for you? your ego cant take a talkative woman, can it?" you spin around, back pressed to the balcony wall. "or maybe," you stare into his eyes, right in front of you. "maybe i'm actually making a better impression than you. all quiet and brooding like an introverted douchebag."

he freezes, and you can tell the words made him mad. but his scowl turns into a sneer within seconds. "really? you don't know how to fucking act around these idiots, do you? you're embarrassing yourself, bitch. giggling like a mindless slut at jokes that arent nearly funny enough for your time."

you laugh. "so you're jealous? try being funny and maybe i'll laugh at you sometime. oh wait, i already do. at your stupid 'mob etiquette' that makes absolutely no sense. that's the real joke"

he grabs your forearm, holding your hand up to your face. "you see that?" he asks, clearly talking about the small tattoo on your inner wrist, still a little red from healing and slightly covered by the sleeve of your blouse.

it's a symbol, the mob's. a king of diamonds playing card, except the diamonds were in the shape of an hourglass. "do you know what it means? it means you're gonna fucking listen to me when i tell you what to do. you made a deal. you hold up your end of the bargain."

"and i'm just making it fun."

he smirks. "making it fun? i can do that too, whore."

he spins around, pulling you by where he was still gripping your arm. he drags you to the wall, away from the balcony, where he pushes you against the gold detailing.

"you do what i say, right?"

you can't help but grin. "yes."

"yes what?"

"sir."

he presses his knee between your thighs, his pants sliding against yours, dragging along your heat.

"you like that?" he asks when you twitch, mouth dropping open. you nod, balancing yourself by holding onto his shoulders. he chuckles, voice gravely with lust, and grabs your jaw with his hands.

"you're gonna take it like a good girl, aren't you?" he grins when you whimper. "gon' be nice 'n quiet for me."

he drags a hand down your neck, your collarbones, down to your chest, rubbing his thumb over your breast, digging his fingers into your blouse while he started undoing a few of the buttons.

"god, you look so good like this. mine. sexy."

you almost giggle but you can't really think with the way he's fondling your tits and pulling your shirt to the side so he can see your bra.

"not here... please." you look over at the bodygaurds standing in front of the windows a few feet away, clearly side-eyeing the scene san was making no matter how shadowed it was. "please sir."

san just laughs and shoves your bra down, letting your breasts spill free.

you feel your eyes start to water, but you force yourself to take his hands.

god, his hands.

he looks down at you, grinning like the devil, rolling up his silk sleeves while digging his knee into your cunt like he was trying to shove it inside you.

and then he's touching you again.

hes unbuttoning your slacks, pushing them down with your panties in tow.

his fingers slip through your folds, and you buck your hips into his palm.

"oh my god-" you mutter, head spinning when you feel his thumb on your clit.

he smirks and rubs faster, feeling your fingers dig into his shoulder with every flick, every press of his hand onto your waist.

and the second you think about letting yourself go, he's not touching you.

he's unbuttoning his pants instead.

he smiles when his dick hits you on the stomach, and you let a little gasp slip out.

"you like my cock, right? it's your favorite, huh?"

"y-yes sir."

"and when i put it in and start fucking you like the whimpering whore you are, are you gonna cum before i tell you to?"

your legs are about to give out now. "no sir."

"good girl."

he grabs your thigh and lifts it up so your knee is hooked over his hip. and then he drags his tip through your wet lips.

his eyes meet yours.

"oh fuck!" you shout, and san covers your mouth with his free hand, his cock stretching you open and pushing further in with every twitch of your hips.

"shut up... shut up and fucking take it." he mutters as he starts moving, hips pushing into and pulling out of you slow. but deep. very, very deep.

so deep you thought you could feel him in your throat.

but maybe that was his hand on your neck.

his pace is killing you, the way he moves so slow, like this is all a game to him, like it wasnt torture on your poor, wet pussy.

"oh god, faster... please..." you mumble, trying to be quiet even though the gaurds had certainly already seen by now.

"you want it faster, huh? thought you didn't even want it at all?"

you dont respond. your face is red and sweaty and you're pretty sure your mascara is running but you couldn't care less.

because san is fucking you faster.

he slams his dick into you harder, holds your neck a little tighter, squeezes your thigh in ways that will leave bruises for a while.

your mascara is definitely running now. the tears made sure of that.

san lets go of your neck to hold your other leg when it gives out, wrapping it around his waist and holding you against the wall. his arms are flexing but he can barely feel it.

he loves the burn anyway.

when he feels you clenching harder around him, your gasps getting louder, your hands digging into his back, he fucking pulls out.

you almost scream.

not again.

san is fucking laughing. "you should've just taken what i fucking gave you." he drops you and you barely catch yourself.

"please..." you whine, hands still on his chest. you're a mess, hair sweaty, makeup smeared, tits still out and pants on the floor, along with one of your heels.

he scoffs. "go clean yourself up, slut." he pushes you towards the bathroom, zips his pants up, and walks away, strides long and confident.

bastard.

but god knows he wasn't done with you. that's clear in his cunning smile when he sits back down at the table.

⊹────── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──────⋆

a.n- "im getting in your head" more like "im getting in your bed" BAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAH that was really bad omg

masterlist you may also like: babygirl- s.jy

[tsukkimi1]

150725 - roommate!tsukishima / part 1

wc: 0.5k

cw: [suggestive themes]

AN: first fic, likes and reblogs appreciated <3

You walk into your shared apartment after a long day at work to find Tsukishima at the kitchen counter with his laptop. The room is barely lit by the warm, dim glow from outside and the small lamp in the corner. You continue walking toward the island when he peers at you over the rim of his glasses. 

“What’s wrong with you?” he questions. 

“Long day,” you shoot back, glaring at him. 

“You get so bratty when you’re tired,” he mocks in his usual dry tone. 

You scowl at him as you continue making your food. 

“Oh, I’m sorry… are you going to cry about it?” you snap while mixing your rice. 

He smirks, closing his laptop with a deliberate slowness. “Keep glaring at me like that and see what happens.” 

You roll your eyes, “What are you gonna do about it?” 

He stands and leans against the island with both arms watching you cook with that unbearable smug look on his face that just makes you want to push his face into the ground.     “God you are so insufferable...beautiful, but insufferable” he mutters just barely quiet enough for you to hear 

You pause, spoon halfway to your mouth as you try to recall what you just heard. “Excuse me? Was that meant to be a compliment?”    He shrugs mockingly, eyes glinting with a pinch of thirst “Depends on how you take it” 

Despite his face reflecting some emotion beyond the usual enjoyment he gets from teasing you, his voice remains as dry and monotone as ever. 

You smirk, setting the spoon down. “Careful. Flattery might get you nowhere.” 

He shrugs, stepping closer just enough to close the gap but not too much. “I’m not exactly counting on flattery. More like your usual stubbornness getting in your way.” 

Your heart skips, but you keep your tone steady. “So, you’re saying I’m a problem.” 

“More like a pain,” he replies dryly, lips twitching into a small, rare smirk. “Looks like I’m stuck with it.” 

You meet his gaze and flash him a sly grin. “Pain’s got nothing on how annoying you are.” 

His eyebrow raises, amused by your quick wittedness, “was that supposed to be upsetting?”    You step a little closer closing most of the distance between you two, “Well, that’s up for you to decide.”   

His eyes narrow but there’s a hint of something unclear building in them, “You’re impossible.” 

The air feels like its starting to suffocate you. The tension building with each word that comes out of his mouth. You can hear your heart beating through your ears and you’re almost positive he can hear it too for a moment it seems like the world stopped-- Neither of you moved until -- 

Without any warning he leans in just enough for his breath to graze of your ear, “don’t think im going to go easy on you just because youve had a long day..” 

As if your heart already wasnt beating hard enough before, you’re sure its pounding now. 

“Oh? Is that so..” you whisper, voice dripping with curiosity. 

uh this is my first time writing so please let me know what you guys think 😇 also part two next

[delluluofical]

ordinary day; daryl dixon

• just some ordinary day in your life with him. (this is a bit long sorry)

• paring ✩ daryl dixon x fem reader. season ten, the latest episodes.

• a/n: hi guys so this is my first ever post and also the first time I’ve write something thing so please don’t be mean and have a little faith on me I’ll get better I promise:) also English it’s NOT my native language so please if you see something wrong you can point out!positive comments are appreciated !

Alexandria was a total mess, those motherfuckers whispers destroyed everything. It was pretty early when you both woke up, the warm sun on your skin made you smile widely and he noticed it putting a little smile on his lips, he gently brushed the hair that was on your face "mornin" he said with a raspy voice as you stretched your arms and groaned softly "hi handsome" you said smirking at him, he scoffed and leaned towards you brushing his lips on yours, it was gentle but also hungry for your love.

As you both got ready you passed Lydia’s room witch the door was slightly open, you knocked… no response so you open it carefully, you could hear her peaceful little snores she was still asleep, you smile and said "morning lyd, comon im making breakfast get ready and get down" she groaned and turned to you "coming" she said, you closed the door behind you leaving her room. You and daryl ate together with a comfortable silence, lyd took a while to get downstairs so you left her food there for her.

When daryl was heading out you said your goodbyes as you looked at him examining every single detail of his face, he narrow at you " what?" he said with his hand in your hips "nothing just admiring you, never know when could be the last time" you said raising your shoulders and tilting your head to the side, he looked at you like he was looking into your soul "It won’t kay!" he said bringing his hands and cupping your face closing the space between you two, he pulled away and smirked at you and you just simply scoffed at him and smiled, and just like that he was gone. Daryl went out to hunt, he’s been out a lot recently but since you guys started whatever you guys are, you knew, knew that you couldn’t keep him locked for too long so you just accept that, sure it made you a bit nervous but you also knew he’d always come back, for you. He asked you if you wanted to come, you hesitated a little but you denied cause you wanted to help Alexandria get back on their feet.

Carol went with him, you got happy to see them together again, you loved their friendship, it is a special bond for both of them and you appreciate it. You worked with Jerry the entire day, caring things, helping others yeah, it’s was pretty draining but deep down you liked. You were on your pause when Lydia came and put her hands over your eyes, you tensed a little but when you heard her giggles your body relaxed you knew, it was her, "hmm let me think?, maybe the coolest girl in this place?!" you took her hands out of your face and turned to her smiling hard and immediately pulling her into your arms giving her a big and warm hug, she loves you, always had, you were one of the only ones who cared, really cared about her.

"how are you?" she asked getting rid of you "good, u?" you said as you pulled all of her hair that was resting on her shoulders all to the her back "good… look you remember that book you barrow me, little woman?" she asked "yeah, why?" "well yesterday I had nothing to do so I made…how can I say it…an essay maybe, and I uh…kinda wanted you to read it" she said shyly "are you serious?, oh my god of course I can lyd" "really bc if you don’t want to it’s fi-" you stopped her "stop that okay of course I want to, after dinner you n me at the living room, alright?" you said and she smiled at you "okay!" before she could say anything Jerry called her for help "go! don’t forget okay!!" you said nodding at his direction, she smiled and left.

The hard work finally came to an end, leaving you exhausted, as you were about to enter your shared house with daryl and lyd, Carol enter the gates with dog. You narrowed and walked towards her "hi u okay?" you asked her she nodded "he’s fine just haven’t finished what he wanted but he’ll be back in the morning I guess" you nodded at her, getting closer "you’re really okay?" "just tired" she smiled tiredly patting your shoulders and left. You walk home, immediately heading upstairs to the bathroom you took your clothes off and went straight to bathroom, you took your time and finally got out putting a oversized shirt who was Daryl’s and some comfortable shorts. You ate a basic sandwich.

By the time you finished it Lydia enter the house also heading upstairs, you went to the couch and waited for lyd, she came back after 15 minutes "you hungry? you asked as she slipped into the couch with you "no I ate at Jerry’s" she said as she took a paper out of her pockets "here, don’t judge me alright?" you nodded and took the paper and started reading.

"Wow that was really good lyd and I mean it, you really know how to make a point you know that?" you said smirking at her "wait really?" " yeah look it’s very good and I agree hundred percent about Amy and Laurie" she looked at you and smiled "thanks it means a lot, well im gonna sleep im sooo tired oh my god" she said getting up heading upstairs "good nightt lydi" as she disappeared. You sight and looked around, god the house felt so empty without that stubborn, you missed his scent, "alright girl your so clingy omg" you scoffed and got up heading to bed.

It was sunny by the time daryl come back, he immediately remembered you, you’ve always loved this whether. He enter the house heading upstairs opening the room you shared looking at you so peaceful, so beautiful, he went straight to the shower. You were so tired that you didn’t even hear him, suddenly the bed cracked a bit and you signed eyes still closed, you felt a body getting closer to you, you obviously knew it was him, your man.

His face glued to the crock of your neck letting sweet kisses on it, wrapping himself around you, you groaned softly "hey you" you said "hi" he answered back, you could notice how tired he was by his voice, "everything alright?" "yea everything’s alright", you stayed quiet for a while, then you turned to him just a little so you could see his fratures you asked "you showered?" you asked he scoffed rolling his eyes at you "yes ma’am I did" you smiled weakly at him then turned back around grabbing his arms and placing then around your waist, keeping your hands with his, he immediately accepted it and squeezed, he leaned into your face pressing his lips against yours, it was slow and sloppy, he sighed softly "missed you" he said looking at you tiredly, "me too babe" you said back, brushing his hair out of his gorgeous face kissing his forehead, he leaned back adjusting himself, he missed you so much, he just wants to get lost in your fragrant hair. God he missed you so goddamn much.

You both stayed like that for hours not worrying about anything.

- 𝔤𝔞𝔟𝔯𝔦𝔢𝔩𝔩𝔞.

[darlingdaisyfarm]

Your writing makes me so happy!

And i was wondering if you could write something with Stan and ford about how they get when you make them jealous on purpose and what they would do….

oh i suppose if reader makes them jealous on purpose it’s some kind of brat behaviour and im into it . how do u guys know me so well <3

nsfw

so first of all... Stan is a brat tamer 100%. me and my wife were discussing this and came to conclusion this man surely knows what to do with troublemaking sly-smiling little-tease things like you. you who bat your lashes and go “what? I didn’t do anything!” after very obviously giggling at the guy who gave you free fries just for smiling

obviously Stan was watching you, watching the way you leaned on the counter. and you knew. and you loved the way his jaw clenched.

“keep flirtin’. let’s see how long you last once we’re alone.” AND HE MEANS IT.

i see him as someone who expresses his emotions rather more open than Ford, so you won’t be wondering if he’s mad. oh no. you’ll know. he’ll say it. growling it low while dragging you out of the public eye.

yeah he’s possessive, after all it’s about you being his. his baby. his fucking brat. and be prepared for your ass to be red by the time he’s done with you <3 it's just, ive been having some thoughts about Stan using his belt. like you act out? boom. belt’s off. folded in his hand while he murmurs “you wanted attention? you got it, sweetheart”

and it’s not like hard pain or anything terrifying, he’s so good at knowing how to leave your skin tingling and your brain fogged and your body trembling.

but honestly he can’t stay mad, not for long. after you’ve sniffled and cried and squirmed and begged, he’s right there. kissing the marks, murmuring “you’re okay, you’re alright, you did so good for me”

like he’ll give you hell for pushing his buttons, but he’ll never leave you feeling unloved. he’ll pull you in after, kiss your forehead and make you sit in his lap while you sip on the soda he stole from the vending machine just for you.

BUT. also. do not, i repeat, do NOT flirt with some random tourist in front of him.

because yeah. he’ll drag you into the staff room. you’re already bent over the desk while he undoes his fly and says “if you’re gonna act like a slut, ill fuck you like one”

+ imagine how how hot itll be if he's still wearing his mr. mystery outfit + eyepatch. im so weak

you’re biting your lip trying to stay quiet and he just goes “let ‘em hear. you want attention, don’t you?” so no, don't even hope that he'll cover your lewd moans with his palm like he often does if you're fucking somewhere in public. this time you're on your own. let everyone hear you.

you’re the one who wanted to be a brat. enjoy it <3

and for Ford okay honestly i often think about spanking with this man but he uses his six-fingered hand instead of a belt <33

like imagine how precise he is. he knows exactly where to strike, how to cup, how to sting and leave you aching in the best way.

but also!! Ford is the kind of man who pretends he’s above jealousy. PRETENDS he’s logical.

he’ll go quiet, cold even, which makes it so much worse because you know he’s stewing. you can see it. his habit of adjusting his glasses when he doesn't like something. but he says nothing

until you’re alone. so he would wait until you, as always, start getting needy or kissing him hinting on maybe some quick sex or petting session before bed or whatever (you know, your usual routine) and you expect it to go as always. but then oh he switches up on you.

he won’t touch you. he’ll sit stiff and distant, arms crossed while you’re trying to squirm into his lap, and all you receive is “oh, now you want my affection?” and of course he'll turn it into a lesson as if youre some student who cheated on a test. “it was childish. immature. and frankly, embarrassing. if your goal was to incite jealousy, congratulations. but don’t expect a reward for it.”

he’ll make you earn his touches. you’ll have to beg and whine. you’ll have to take every word of that little lecture while sitting there pantless with your thighs pressed together hoping he’d just touch you already.

and even when he does, he’ll pull your hands away. tell you not yet and make you listen. and then maybe, maybe if you’re lucky, he’ll finally give you what you want. with a hand that’s got one extra finger to leave an extra stripe across your skin <3

he makes you get on top and ride him until your thighs burn, keeps eye contact the entire time but it’s the part where you try to be bratty or say smth like “you seemed fine with it at the time” and his hands snap up to your hips as he drives up into you so hard the breath leaves your lungs.

oh yeah. now he’s mad <33

[toonedtoons-blog]

I recently discovered your goof troop reboot idea and the designs are super cute! I was wondering if you had anymore headcanons to share?

why yes! i have tons of ideas, i tend to get sidetracked a lot and i haven't done much progress on putting them into words

life, work and all that jazz

(for anyone curious about the Goof Troop project)

first of all! i deeply apologize for the sheer amount of words im about to unload, but i've been foaming at the mouth to tell this to someone

but! i will try to cut the wording with some sketches, old new and concept art✏️

⚠️ a lil bit of spoilers ahead⚠️

i will go in order

1) this is a period piece, i don't think Goof Troop would work in a modern 2020s setting, not that it wouldn't be interesting, but giving Goofy 3 jobs to rent a tiny apartment while trying his absolute hardest to be there for max is a bit depressing to my 30 year old ass.

specifically it is set in 1992, the year the show came out and it would last till 1996 when max turns 12 so there is a gap between this and the events in the goofy movies, i don't want to intrude in the movie canons.

2) Mrs. Goof, it was left in the air what happened to Max's mom, there are implications that there was a Mrs. Goof at some point but it was never expanded upon, this is one of the things i wanted to develop, so in my story she died while max was much younger, around 4 or 5, and now that he is 8 he has questions, he was too young to understand why she is not there and part of him is starting to forget things like her face or her voice and Goofy doesn't know how to even begin to explain it to him is not something always present but it is a subject that both of them have at the back of their minds.

How they move to Spoonerville? i changed things a bit, in this story Goofy inherits the old Goof house and that's why they move there, Max is overjoyed to move actually, he didn't have the best of times at his old school, and wants to restart somewhere else with a new persona, that's why he acts so radical and cool and too good to accept his father's "weird" ways

the house is RUN DOWN, pretty sure they shouldn't even be living in it but hey, that's life, so throughout the "first season" they are trying to repair it, with Goof's limited budget, while Pete wants to take it off his hands by all means necessary (he is a landlord now)

3) The Horsecollars, part of bringing my absolute fav disney character Horace Horsecollar (best boi in the galaxy) was giving him a Goof Troop type story, so just like Pete and Goofy, he is a father as well, i had a lot of fun writing this story for him, part of me doesn't want to spoil it but knowing my life this is my best opportunity to tell it in full

his story actually beings in the 70s, just like Pete and Peg, he was Goofy's friend, no, BEST friend, they were both silly guys, their personalities are quite similar in some areas, and just like Pete, Horace had a big falling out moment with Goofy, but this time it was mutual, 70s disco is in the air and Horace wants to invite Clarabelle to senior prom, he and Goofy were practising all year to have the best dance moves at the party, what could go wrong? Goofy of course

without meaning to! he got in the way and Clara thought he was the one asking her to prom, leaving Horace to be ridiculed by their classmates, in turn Horace doesn't show up to the party leaving Goofy in the dust , they both felt betrayed and after graduation Horace left to LA to become an actor, they never spoke to each other since. (Goofy holds no resentment but he was his own POV of the events)

in LA, Horace always struggled to get a job and never quite became the actor he wanted, but one day at a party he met HER, Helen, who tried to become a screenwriter, they both hit it off but after that they just continued their lives, until a fateful call. (what could have happened??) the two ended up marrying in a bit of a hurry.

they had a little girl, Hayley, the honeymoon quickly ends because neither had a stable job at that point, they juggled odd jobs, their dream future creers and being parents together, that was UNTIL! Helen had the best idea to pitch, a space opera, a hero for the kids, that's right Maximum Horsepower, starring Horace as the space ranger that saves the day! the show was an absolute success, with 3 seasons and movies

what could possibly go wrong? well, if you know Horace as much as i do, he is cocky, a bit too much sometimes, demanding more from the company he worked for, sure that "they wouldn't fire someone as important" he got fired, show cancelled, back to square 1.

so Helen and Horace are not in good terms at the moment, and are in the midst of a messy separation, Horace moves back to Spoonerville to the old Hosecollar home and sometime later Hayley moves to live with him while Helen is putting things in order back at LA

all this to say, Hayley starts as a bit of a bully to Max and P.J., not like Pistol, Pistol is way worse, but Hayley doesn't make things easy either. After an incident she and Max end up in friendlier terms

she is not part of the gang btw, she ends up being friends with Max and PJ but there is a bit of an age gap (she is 4 at the start and turns 5 a few chapters later), so she is kinda just living her own little life, but they hang out often.

who is Hayley as a character? well as i mentioned this is set in the early to mid 90s, expect a lot of old 90s tropes, with a bit of spice added to them, Hayley for example is your stereotypical Girly girl, pink, dolls and more, BUT not in an "ew girls are icky/annoying" kinda way, there was A LOT of putting girls and girly stuff in ridicule back in the day, i didn't like that and i don't like that even today

so she is shamelessly girly.

She is physically strong, because Horace is known to be "the muscle" in the old Mickey gang, makes sense she would inherit some of that

A bit of a tech wiz, Horace is a big showoff

he works on tech related stuff at the mall, of course he would have the latest things at his house, even if he doesn't even know what they do, Hayley has a lot of tech at hand and lots of time to figure them out

and this is 1992, having a computer at home wasn't common yet, and even the internet worked differently, web browsers were just born that year

a lil rebel, a rascal if you will, all dads in this show have different parenting styles, we all know Goofy is best dad, openly affectionate and leaving Max to his own devices often, Pete is all the bad boomer parenting stuff all crammed into his form, leaving Horace to be the other kind of boomer parent, the over protective one, i know this trope has become a bit icky lately, blame girl-dad tiktok for that

but i argue that Horace is going through stuff, lost his dream job and family, knows Hayley could go back to LA at any moment, its a lot for the horsey, there is a bit of a disconnection between the two and Hayley wants to do her own thing, but she is also 4-5.

4) and finally The Petes!

starting with Mr. Pete, unlike Goof or Horace, he never left Spoonerville, why would he? his old man had this landlording thing going on and he inherited the business, upper middle class, living the life, now if only he could get rid of that ugly old house across the street! give it the good old landlord special, but uh oh, now Goofy is living there?? unnaceptable!

now you'd think that in this case "the enemy of my enemy is my friend" but on the contrary, Horace and Pete also don't get along

in fact, they could be taken as rivals, everything is a competition between the two, and Horace never misses the opportunity to rub something in Pete's face (and vice versa), all the way down to who has the best grill for the weekend barbecue!

this idea comes mostly because i wanted to see someone give Pete a hard time ON PURPOSE, and not just Goofy's clumsiness and good luck. This doesn't mean that Horace is aware of Pete's shaningans, he just loves to get on his nerves.

Now Peg, she went through the most changes

i gave her a completely different career, she is now an elementary school teacher, she loves children and always wanted to become a teacher.

now this is not to take away from her, she may not be a real state agent anymore but she is still Peg Pete! drill sergeant voice and all.

if you didn't live through the 90s it may be surprising to know but there was a push to go back to that made up 50s americana fantasy, house wifes and all. (yes like the social media trends of today)

and Peg is not really made for the house wife mold, she's rather be doing the thing she went to college for! this is mostly an excuse to have ber for a little bit of season 1, being your stereotypical nosy neighbor, so bored that she just has to show up to her friend's houses unannounced

and yes that is actually something that happened often back then, people just decided to show up at your house one day and you HAD to let them in and socialize

dark times i tell you

she does end up living the dream and work as a teacher a few chapters later don't worry

and you may ask, why a teacher?

well that was actually my friend's idea (Mike, creator of Chucky Chiken on youtube, you should go watch it we are working on that show together) her being a teacher also meant she is very involved in the community, which means she gets to do a lot more than just teaching in the background of the story, she is everywhere! organizing all sort of stuff!

PJ mostly stays the same, he met Hayley before Max and has endured more bullying from the little rascal longer but when she becomes more friendly he is quick to accept her, a sweet boy like in the og show.

Pistol on the other hand?? oh i did promote her from little sister to mean older sister!

it just felt right, her inner Pete in full display

i needed an older character, since i can't have Pete himself bully a bunch of children, and who can be better for that role than a Pete??

simply perfect!

i do have this very old and outdated sketch, back when the ideas were just little scenarios floating in my mind:

OTHER:

clarabelle works as Pete's secretary along with the beagle boys doing his bidding

a bit of a nod to The Three Musketeers (one of my favourites)

i'm still not sure what to do with the weird on/off relationship she has with Goofy and Horace in the Disney canon, all i can say is that Horace likes Clara, Clara likes Goofy, Goofy wants to put his energy on Max rather than dating.

i had the idea of introducing a new horse character in later "seasons" as Helen's new partner and Hayley's potential step father but it ended up feeling a bit wrong to make Horace go through that, i ended scrapping the idea but here is a concept of him

i had plans of giving Bobby an older brother, a *gasp* gen x'er

(please ignore my first attempt to draw Bobby i know he looks wrong)

There is an idea still in development about a pizza place, this is the 90s we talking about of course there is shameless marketing towards children in the form of a fast food chain! jungle playground included

now i was about to claim LOST MEDIA bc i couldn't find my other sketches of it but here they are!

OOP

i almost forgot about the Rovers!

Now im still not sure if Rover is Roxanne's last name but i saw it in a the trivia section of a wiki once, i think it came out in a comic? anyway i decided to take it

Mr. Rover is just like his movie version, a man of few words but with a heart, works at a bowling alley that i will sketch soon because i intend to use the location as much as posible

Mrs. Rover is purely made by me, never seen Roxanne even mention a mom and i was going to leave it like that but then i realized that i already have two single dads... and not many women active in the story i do want more mother figures not just Peg doing all the heavy lifting poor lady.

Mrs. Rover (i named her Linda) is Horace's friend, they started as co-workers at the mall, selling computers and other tech related stuff

i didn't want every single character to have connections to Goofy

+ this also means that Roxanne has a lot of playdates at the Horsecollars' house, a lot of opportunities for her to interact with Max and his gang!

Linda is very supportive of Horace, since he is a single father and needs help here and there, she babysits Hayley often

I have everything down to the layout of the homes of each family

the roundabout is the most important part

makes all homes feel kind of connected in a way, Pete and Goofy's front doors are right in front of each other, meaning that they have to interact every time they leave their homes, while Pete and Horace's backyards are in direct view of each other, also meaning that the two families have to interact whenever they try to spend time in their yards.

and the traffic light in the roundabout helps set the mood of a scene its kinda hard to explain i would need to make more concept art to explain myself but im a big fan of quiet moments in storytelling, and having a moment with the light flickering after an important event is always a delight to picture in my head.

-----

There is much more and a lot more sketches and concepts i cannot show because i reached the limit of pictures noooo

but anyway if you want to know more lemme kno i will make another post with all the stuff i couldn't show

[pintobug]

maintenance

dbf!joel miller x female reader

chapter 7: who’s still standing when the smoke clears?

rating: 18+ MDNI

masterlist

summary: first day back at the diner & a flat tire? joel can make it better.

word count: 5.5k

tags: internal conflict, mentions of anxiety/OCD, mild angst?, little bit of fluff, very transitional chapter im sorry lol, age gap, reader is 23, joel is 46.

a/n: got myself back on schedule. have the next few chapter outlined and i’m excited to write them. thank you all for being beyond patient. <3 also- i've tried to make my writing of reader to be as neutral as possible besides the mention of a little bit of hair length. but if theres ever a sentence of time where you guys think i'm possibly too descriptive of the reader, please point it out!!! i literally just think of myself when writing and have found myself mentioning that readers face turns red when embarrassed while that isn't true for all skin tones. so as i've caught it i've tried to change it to things like 'you feel your face warm' instead. if theres anything i'm overlooking please do not shy away from calling me out! the next chapter will be fun you guys i promise

You did not expect your first day back at Riverside Diner to be so fucking horrendous. It started with two people calling out. Not too bad, but that was just the beginning. Frank was ticked off, but he picked up some tables here and there to take some of the pressure off of you and the other servers. You were nearing the end of your shift, beyond thrilled to go home, get clean and settle down. You’re proud of the way you handled it- just being thrown into the pits of hell like you haven’t missed a day. Bill even tossed some french fries in a paper boat your way, his silent way of thanking you.

You pushed through the swinging doors of the kitchen to look for Frank in the dining room. You locked eyes with him immediately and knew something was wrong. His eyebrows were all pinched up, eyes wide enough to see the whites clear as day and that forced a little too wide smile of his. Frank is moving quickly between the aisles of booths and nodding frantically at the new tables. Your shoulders dropped, the lead weight in your chest pulling them down. You have a feeling you won’t be able to leave right now.

“Hey, sugar.” Frank says with pleading eyes and a sickeningly sweet tone.

You inhale deeply and nod your head, knowing exactly what he’s asking for.

“Need me to stay a little longer?” Deep down you hope he says no.

He nods his head.

“Overheard a few of the tables talking about the arena on campus. I guess there's a band playing- I don’t know. But I need hands, hun. I cut Michelle ten minutes ago. It’s just us.” He wears a pained expression on his face while admitting that last part.

You can’t leave him. You exhale while scanning the dining room, the bell on the door indicating that new customers are filing in is relentless. Slowly but surely table after table filled up, then it was the bar stools and no one was able to flip tables quick enough to keep the line out the door under control. Double sat, triple sat and before you know it there's six tables that don’t have drinks yet. You can’t even think about the bar yet.

“Excuse me!”

You can’t even tell which table it’s from.

Your forced smile is fading and tunnel vision sets in. Frank checks in with you here and there by patting his hand on your back while passing by. He’s running around you, weaving through customers trying to lessen the load. Trays of drinks going out quickly. You’re sure you forgot to put syrup on one of the tables but you can’t remember which. Tightness in your chest reminds you to breathe.

“Come on.. Not now.” You mutter to yourself while repeatedly jamming your finger into the service computer.

It locks up and freezes every now and then but you didn’t have the time for it right now. You’re only halfway through putting the damn order in when it seizes up. You close your eyes and bite back a groan. You can hear the kitchen scrambling, Bill barking out dishes, ticket numbers and tables that he’s still waiting for one more thing. Your throat feels tight. You’re wasting time standing here and just waiting for the stupid fucking computer to pick back up. You slam your guest check down onto the counter and make a round of the tables.

“Can I have a refill?”

You have to double back to grab the cup which wasn’t even empty. It sloshed as you gripped it up and spilled onto your forearm. You cursed under your breath and quickly turned away. Before you dropped that drink off another table stopped you.

“Hi, how much longer for our food?”

Words to the tune of: ‘Are you fucking kidding me?’ are bubbling at the back of your throat. You bite them back and force a toothy grin.

“I’ll check.” You feign kindness.

Quickly you drop off the refill and practically run into the kitchen and past the swinging doors. The first thing you notice is the constant mechanical whirr of the ticket printer spitting out the papers non stop. Bill keeps this a well oiled machine but even now there's tickets hanging from the printer that haven’t been looked at yet, bodies darting from station to station- plating, wiping, topping and serving it through the pass. Bill whistles to you and gestures to the plates he set on a large serving tray.

“Booth ten.” He says, scrapping the ticket and piercing it on the pin.

You grab the large tray mindlessly and head back out into the dining room.

Ten. Ten. Booth ten. Ten.

You’re bobbing through people standing in the walkways, your ‘excuse me’s falling on deaf ears.

“Can I have another straw?” “I think I ordered…” “Are there more napkins?” “…An extra side of bacon.”

You don’t even know which direction the voices are coming from at this point. Somehow you make it there in one piece and don’t even remember setting the food down.

“Can we have syrup?” “And some more napkins.” “If you have any hot sauce, we’d love it if you could bring some out!”

Fuck, you knew you forgot the syrup. By the time you grab the bottle you forget what table even asked for it. You chewed nervously on your lower lip while almost jogging up and down the rows of tables before finally- no syrup in this booth. You set it down, apologize and scurry back to the kitchen before they have the chance to get a word in.

The computer. Holy shit you forgot about the fucking computer. You still didn’t finish putting that order in. You try to now show your pure panic on your face while making your way back to the system. You whine quietly, bouncing on your feet impatiently as you wait for the screen to wake up. It takes a few seconds longer than usual but it’s up. All the air leaves your lungs in a long exhale. Quickly, you enter the order that was forgotten about. Double check it and send it.

You’re running on fumes. Your hands are sticky from syrup and drinks splashed up your arms and your apron is covered in crumbs and smeared whipped cream. Your sweat is sticking to your temples and you’re sure you’ve sweat off half your makeup. There's an ache in the soles of your feet and your lower back and your palms and your bladder- you really need to fucking pee.

The bar. How could you forget about the bar? You quickly make your way behind it and check in with each and every customer sitting there. You turn around and refill, turn again and set it back down. You’re grabbing ketchup, cream, sugars, tabasco, syrup, butter squares, silverware and anything else you could think of- they’re asking for it. The sweat is visible running down your temples, beading under your eyes and the top of your lip.

It goes on for so long. So, so long. Frank trying to keep up with tables, Bill trying to keep up with the kitchen and you trying to keep up with survival right now. But there is a turning point. A light at the end of the tunnel where you’re printing more checks than you’re creating. The bell on the front door no longer signals patrons coming in, but going out. You’re actually able to clean a table off here and there.

It ends. Eventually. You don’t know how it ends but it fucking ends. Hours later. Hours after you were supposed to be home and in bed. When the last customer exits Frank quickly locks the door behind them and takes a moment to lean against the door.

“Holy shit.” Is all he says.

You finally get to pee before starting the break down. Your head is buzzing while clearing tables, thoughts on loop of how exhausted you are and how gross all of these tables are.

“Don’t do any silverware. Just.. We just need to get this place looking like a bomb didn’t go off, hun.” He speaks slowly, clearly exhausted while beginning to sweep the floors. You just finished cleaning the last table when Frank lets you go. He shushes you when you tell him you can still help but he thanks you and pulls you into a hug before sending you on your way.

You made it to your car twenty minutes ago but you just couldn’t muster up the courage to start it. The center of your steering wheel is at the focus of your stare the entire time. Grateful doesn’t even begin to explain your feelings towards sleeping in a little more earlier today. You didn’t have enough time to walk, so you took your car. If you had to walk home after all of that you might have lost it.

Empty. Drained. Fatigued.

All accurate words to describe you right now.

In time you manage to start the car then slowly pull out of the spot and start heading home. You turned into the street and stopped at the red light once you reached it. Sighing, you peered over to your phone that's sitting in the passenger seat. There's a few texts from Ellie. That’s it. You’ll see her soon so you don’t need to answer her right now. There's a soft pull in your chest. You were hoping to see a text from Joel, if you were honest with yourself. Something to pick you up after the shit show you encountered.

The light turns green.

You slowly turn the wheel to the right and let up off of the brake and-

POP! Pfffffffffft.

You jump at the loud noise and slam your foot into the break just as your car slowly begins to tilt. You look around frantically with wide eyes.

“Fuck.” You whispered, peeking out into the street.

You gently pushed your foot into the gas, trying to pull to the side and you heard the crunch of glass under your flattened tire.

“Fuck.” You say again but sharper this time.

You quickly throw the car into park and fling the door open, legs moving quickly while rounding the hood of the car and-

There it is.

The flaccid rubber of the passenger side tire.

You refuse to believe it. Theres absolutely no fucking way you popped a tire after the day you just had. The universe has to be playing some sort of sick joke.

Your mouth hangs open. Flat. Throat is dry. Buzzing fills your ears and tears sting your eyes and your fingers start to numb and your chest is tight and the dizziness starts to creep in and now your face is wet from tears you don’t even have to push out. A broken sob leaves your lips. You pat your hands down your jeans and your pockets are empty. There’s fucking syrup everywhere and the sweet smell on your hands is starting to turn your stomach.

Nauseous. Dirty.

You throw open the passenger door and scramble for your phone with trembling fingers. Everything is blurry through the stinging in your eyes but you find your phone and swipe through it maniacally. You don’t even know what you’re doing all you can feel is lead in your chest and in your stomach and pins and needles in your arms and running down your fingertips and-

“Another late night call?”

The sound of his voice makes you cry harder.

“Woah- What's wrong?” His voice is taught and frantic, that slow sultry drawl now thrown out the window.

You choke out his name.

“Where are you?”

You’re babbling and making no sense. Sore. Your eyes are sore and your throat is sore and your nose starts to run.

“Baby, please tell me where you are?”

You hear keys over the line. You’re rubbing your eyes to regain some sight through tears and running makeup while choking out the closest street sign you can make out and that you think there's a coffee shop behind you. You’re stuttering, every word that passes your lips pulls any lasting energy in your body. Hands are so numb you can’t hold the weight of your phone anymore and it bounces back onto the passenger seat while you sob uncontrollably. Raw and broken and loud.

Crumbling onto the curb, you try to soothe yourself by wrapping your arms around your knees. But you’re sticky. And dirty. Your chest is heaving with breaths ripping through your esophagus. There’s nowhere you can go to wash off and you’re all alone with the walls closing in despite being outside, crying too fucking hard to see your hands right in front of your face.

You don’t know how long you’ve been here. It could be seconds, minutes, or even closer to hours. It’s all melting into one. Continuous sobs while your hands paw at your face in a useless attempt to dry it from tears.

You hear his voice in the distance all muffled and broken up between your sobs. The usual roar of his truck engine is just barely there. A sharp pain in your lungs prevents you from taking a full breath. All the muscles are constricting around your chest. You can’t take a deep breath and your eyes are fluttering while the ringing in your ears takes over everything, deaf to any other sound.

If you thought your throat was raw before, you were sorely mistaken. Every breath hurts. Ripping in and out of your esophagus that's heating up from all the irritation to the point where you’d believe it if you coughed up blood.

Two strong hands settling at your shoulders drags you to a somewhat conscious state. Your face is hot, head throbbing from all of the blood whooshing around. You’re hunched over and shaking. The hands. Strong hands. You feel them gently on your cheeks, tilting your head up. You hear your name over the all familiar crashing waves.

Joel is on the verge of panicking himself. His large hands are enveloping the side of your head that's slick with tears and sweat and who knows what else. His calloused thumbs are swiping at the tears but it’s no use. They keep rolling. Joel catches a glimpse of what should be the whites of your eyes- all red and irritated now with puffy lids. Your lips are swollen and red. He can’t tell what is tears, spit, snot or sweat but he doesn’t care. He just needs to make sure you’re okay.

He’s feverishly scanning your body over and over and over again. No wounds. No injuries. That he can see at least. His stomach turns, nursing his own bout of anxiety but anger bubbles over that as the worst comes to his mind.

Did someone hurt you? Did someone fucking hurt you and leave you here?

He can’t spend time seething over the possibility while you’re hysterical in front of him. He needs to reel you in. He starts by whispering your name but it’s overshadowed by your cries and gasps for breath. He repeats it but can see the disconnect. You’re looking through him right now. Not at him. He’s talking but you’re not hearing.

He does the only thing he thinks he could and pulls you into his chest there on the curb with his knees digging into the asphalt. Joel soothes a hand down your back repeatedly and whispers into your ear. He’s talking aimlessly about anything that comes to mind. But it starts to cut through.

He pulls you from his chest after some time and takes another look at you. This time you’re looking at him. Really looking. Pupils dilated. His heart throbs heavily. Seeing you like this makes him sick but he doesn’t dwell on it. He knows he needs to be a rock for you right now and he wouldn’t want to do anything else. All caution is out the window. Joel doesn’t care if anyone sees him consoling a ‘client’ at this time of night. The word leaves a bad taste in his mouth. You’re no damn client to him, no matter how badly he tries to convince himself.

He thinks about you a lot. He tries to control himself, he swears he really does but it’s to no avail. He tries not to contact you the second he opens his eyes and it’s getting painful. He doesn’t have an easy time trying to process these emotions. Forget explaining them. He’s not good with words despite how well he can talk you through it. Joel likes to think his actions speak for themselves.

They do.

The waves begin to settle and the gravel of his voice takes over.

“Shhh, s’okay sweetheart.”

“Gonna need to try and calm down f’me, now.”

“I’ve gotcha, darlin’.”

Your voice is frail and cracking.

“M-My tire.. I’m dirty.” You sputter out through a coughing fit and quieting sobs.

He can just barely make out what you’re saying through your gasps for breath and coughing.

“Are you hurt? Did somebody hurt you?” His voice is soft and unwavering with fear in his eyes.

“No!” You choke out and sob into his hands that linger at your face.

You don’t mean to raise your voice at him but he doesn’t mind. You bring your hands to cover your face but instead they clamp over his hands that cradle your face. He pulls you closer into him, feeling the sticky syrup grab onto his shirt and frowns. It doesn’t bother him really but he knows it's upsetting you.

“C’mon baby, look at me.” Joel tries to coax you through your heavy breathing but you don’t listen.

Slowly he pulls his hands from your face and finds your eyes again. Joel takes both of your hands in one of his and presses it to his chest. He takes slow, calculated breaths that force his chest to expand and collapse.

“Breathe with me darlin’.” He whispers

You tried to focus on the steady rise and fall of his chest but it was hard. Joel reeled you back in with a squeeze of your hands. You can feel the soft thud behind his chest. Steady and strong. You flatten your one palm there and try to focus. Rise and fall and thud. He’s here and he’s real and you can feel him.

You suck in a slower breath through a tight jaw, attempting to match him. It’s broken and shaking but it’s slower. Joel nods his head encouragingly and continues to exaggerate his slow, deep breaths.

You’re almost matching his pace now, your own heart no longer thumping in the base of your throat. Tears are slowing to a drip down your cheeks.

“Are you hurt?” Joel speaks up eventually.

“No.” Your voice is hoarse.

“Why are you out here all alone, sweetheart?”

“Tire.”

He looks over his shoulder at it and then back to you.

“Did something happen before that?”

“Work.” You have no energy to give anything more than that flat, one worded answer.

You can’t force anymore and Joel knows that, so he doesn’t push. He lets you sit quietly against him for some time.

Eventually Joel taps you and pulls you up with him while holding you steady.

“C’mon with me.” He whispers and walks you over to his truck that's pulled in front of your car.

He keeps his arm wrapped around your shoulders as you walk next to him. Joel lowers the tailgate of his truck and turns to you then picks you up like it’s nothing and sets you onto the edge with your legs dangling off. He stands between your knees with hands at your shoulders, steadying you.

“I’ll be right back.” He mutters and leaves you to dig in the cabin of his truck.

You’re slouched over with the weight of the world on your back and your arms collapsed into your lap. You sniff and rub your wet nose with the back of your arm and let it collapse again. Joel returns shortly with a bottle of water with the cap already removed.

“I always got some in the back seat.” He says casually while gesturing it towards you.

You blink at it a few times then look at Joel before slowly taking the water bottle into your shaky hand and bringing it to your lips. He leans forward to press a kiss to your forehead while you take small sips. Then another. And another. And the last one lingers for a long time. The water hurts going down your throat, still swollen and raw from your cries but it will help.

“You tell me if you need somethin’. M’gonna fix that up for you.” He says while giving your thigh a gentle pat and a squeeze.

You don’t respond or react but look at him with wet and irritated dyes. You watch him walk over to your car and ponder for a moment with his hands at his hips and one knee cocked out. He rifles through your trunk before coming out with the car jack. He slips it under the car and starts cranking it up.

Joel works quietly and doesn’t say anything to you while he’s working but he does look at you maybe every ten seconds just to make sure you’re still there and breathing. Maybe to make sure you’re not going off the deep end again. Joel has noticed small comments over the past few weeks but he has never pressed you on anything you haven’t come outright and told him about. But he makes a note in his head to press you about this. Not right now. Or any time tonight. But he will. Joel doesn’t know if he’s helping you and it makes him feel uneasy. Could he be making this worse for you? His only saving grace is that you’re no longer screaming and crying. He replaces your flat tire with the spare in your trunk in record time.

“Still got it, huh?” He jokes lightly.

It’s exactly what he said after moving your dresser into your room and it makes your heart heavy. You remember how you responded all those weeks ago but you do not have the energy to do it now. It doesn’t look like he minds. Without another word he helps you off of the tailgate and sets you back on your wobbling feet. Joel walks with you around his truck to the passenger side and opens the door for you. You grab onto his shoulder while climbing in.

“Stay here.” He says.

You listen, no desire to move in the slightest. The rumble of your car's engine startles you and you whip your head to the side. Joel slowly rolls your car against the side of the road, lining it up before shutting it off again. Guilt pangs in your stomach. Moments later he returns with your phone, bag and keys. He reaches over you to set them all on the center console and lets his hand rest on your knee.

“I’m sorry.” You choke out.

He tuts quietly and shakes his head. He’s pressed into the side of the car, knees pressed into the running board and arm slung over your thighs. His other hand brushes some hair from your face while he whispers to you.

“Nothin’ to be sorry for, baby. When I told you to call me next time you needed me, I meant that. M’proud of you for rememberin’.”

You open your mouth to blubber out another apology but he cuts you off with a simple kiss. It’s sweet. Gentle and warm against your face that feels like an open wound. You barely return the kiss but not because you don’t want to, you simply don’t have the energy to. He pulls back from the kiss and just stays close. Your eyes bore into his, almost ready to cry again from how sweet and gentle he’s being despite not knowing what the fuck is going on.

“Moved your car into an actual spot so you won’t get a ticket. I’ll take you back here tomorrow morning, alright sweetheart?” He hums.

You slowly nod.

“Can I take you home?”

You nod again before Joel buckles you into the seat and gently closes the door. He rounds the hood of the truck and hops in the driver's seat. His hand makes immediate contact with your knee, heavy and comforting as he drives away. The ride is silent other than Joel triple checking if you’re okay. And to remind you to drink water. A few more squeezes of your knee and you’re sitting outside of your house.

Ellie’s room light is on. Fuck.

“She home?” Joel questions while lowering his head to look at what you’re looking at.

“She is,” You say quietly with eyes lingering on the window. “I don’t want you to leave.”

Joel turns the key and the engine rumbles before stopping. He didn’t question your request.

“Can you wait here? I can sneak you in.” You say while unbuckling your belt.

“Sneak? Why do you have to sneak me in?” He asks with saddled brows.

“You want Ellie to see you bringing me home this late? You didn’t even want the neighbors to see you coming over without a toolbox in your hand.” It sounds more harsh than you mean it.

It makes Joel’s chest tighten but he doesn’t comment because it’s true. He did say something to that effect. He regrets it. But he’d be silly to deny the excitement he gets from sneaking around like a teenage boy again.

“Stay here?” You look over your shoulder at Joel.

“You sure you’re okay to go in by yourself?”

“Just for a second. I’ll be okay.” Your voice keeps its soft, hushed tone.

Joel nods and watches you exit the truck, walk to the front door and disappear.

You sigh the second you enter your house, a comforting and familiar space feels better than the sidewalk at midnight. You hang your bag on the hook and slowly wall up the stairs to Ellie’s room.

“Ellie?” You call out quietly with a hand on her door knob.

Slowly, you push the cracked door open while the door squeaks and you silently curse yourself. No answer. She’s laying on her belly, game controller in hand, slipping off the bed. Face smushed into the comforter she’d sprawled on top of. You blink a few times and shake your head. She had to have fallen asleep in the middle of a game, the monitor still had a game lobby up with quiet music playing on a loop. You sigh quietly and back out of the room, quietly clicking the door shut.

You turn and make your way down the steps again and open the front door. Joel is still sitting in his truck across the street from your house. You wave for him to come in and wait for him to get up to the doorway. You lock the door behind him and gesture him up the steps while ‘shhhhsh’ing him when he takes a step that creaks too loud.

“She’s asleep,” You whisper once the two of you make it into your room. “and I really need to shower. But feel free to make yourself comfortable here.”

You look around your room with Joel in it. It’s surreal.

“Let me come in with you.” He says softly while taking a few steps closer to you.

You don’t speak for a moment, surprised at his comment.

“Come in with me?” You repeat his words back to him.

He chuckles quietly and nods his head.

“Yeah, come in with you.” He repeats again in a lighthearted tone.

So, you shower together. The water was warm enough to create steam that fogged the mirror as it billowed out from behind the curtain. Joel steps in first and makes sure the water feels right before taking your hand and guiding you under the stream. It feels normal. You don’t stop to think about being fully nude in front of him for the first time because he doesn’t make it feel like you should. He’s soft and gentle, no lingering stares anywhere but your face and his hands massaging shampoo into your hair. Joel cradles your head and tilts it under the water to let it wash away the suds then brings you out of the stream to press a soft kiss to your forehead. He’s doing all of the work for you, sudsing the soap between his hands and the washcloth and softly scrubbing it over your arms to get rid of any sticky syrupy patches. You want to stay like this forever.

With his hand, Joel pushes his hair away from his face, now shades darker from the water and slicked back. Brown eyes blinking the water away under heavy lids. A pang of guilt hits you low in your stomach for the second time. You don’t even know what time it was when you called him. He has to be exhausted but here he is in the shower, washing your strawberry scented soap off of your skin.

“Feelin’ alright?” He says just loud enough over the patter of water.

“I’m alright.” You nod your head slowly.

He turns you around a few times in the water making sure there's no more suds latched onto your skin before reaching around and turning the water off. You wrap your arms around your chest and stand there with water rolling down your legs while Joel reaches for one of the towels hanging up. He helps you out and wraps the warm towel around your shoulders. You pull it tighter around yourself while Joel reaches for a second towel and wraps it around his waist. He reaches out and settles a hand on the door knob.

“Wait-” You blurt out and he turns his head back to you, not moving a muscle.

“Let me check and make sure she’s still asleep.” You whisper.

Joel nods and stands to the side. You slowly turn the knob and push the door open, peeking out to confirm that the coast is clear. You open it and gesture Joel out, his arms filled with the clothing the two of you were previously in.

“I’ll be in there in a minute.”

He nods his head and presses a soft kiss to your lips before you watch him disappear into your bedroom. You take a deep breath and sigh while turning to face the mirror hanging on the wall. There's still some stubborn mascara under your eye. You fasten the towel under your arms and start to spot clean with a cotton pad. Moments later you’ve got a clean face, brushed teeth and you’re about to finish detangling your hair when a soft knock rasps at the door. You pause and turn towards it, cracking it open.

You nearly jump out of your skin when you’re greeting with Ellie’s drowsy face. You’re grateful her eyes are barely open because she can’t question the pure shock on your face when you see her.

“Y’got home so late.” She mumbles while rubbing her eyes.

“I know. I promise I’ll fill you in tomorrow but go back to bed. Your eyes aren’t even open, Ellie.”

“Gotta pee.” She says with eyes still squinted.

“Shit, sorry.” You cringe and slip out of the bathroom.

“Goodnight.” Ellie grumbles.

“Night, Ellie.” You whisper while slipping into your bedroom.

You slowly click the door closed and turn around, pressing your back into the door and sighing heavily.

“Looks like you seen a ghost, darlin’.” His low voice breaks the anxiety building in your stomach.

You force a breathy laugh and lift your head to look at him. God, it takes all of the air out of your lungs. His hair is no longer soaked, it’s damp and starting to curl at the ends like it normally does. His tanned torso is exposed with hair littering his chest with a fine line down his soft stomach while it disappears under the band of his boxers. His sweatpants hung so low on his hips you could see said band before the elastic of his pants just under it. That was it. Joel Miller, damp in your bedroom. You couldn’t ask for anything more.

It reminds you of the night of the storm. When he surprised you at your front door, soaked to the bone. The only difference is, this Joel just helped you through a panicked episode without a shred of knowledge of them, washed you off and showered you clean and this Joel helps you get dressed, too. He helps you pull on a shirt over your head and he makes sure none of your hair is caught in the collar of it. He holds out his arm to balance you while you’re slipping on a pair of your shorts. This Joel lays in bed next to you under your comforters with your back pressed firmly into his chest and his strong arm draped over your waist.

You like this Joel, too.

[cxvii666]

haley or @twoplayergaymers inspired me bcos ive had this in the drafts for ages but idk writing gl feels sacred to me in a way that writing about male characters doesn't. like ive always idk im very critical of my writing sometimes and ive had this drafted for ages but its one of them ones i keep rewriting and re editing bcos i don't think its good enough.... but we only live once so here's the beat:

“darling, i”

feat. mina a.

“keep falling in love”

↻ ◁ || ▷ ↺

it starts in the way it always does.

with shared shoes. shared lip gloss. shared silence that only feels natural when it’s her.

your legs are thrown over hers on the couch in jirou’s living room, something old and nostalgic playing on the TV. there’s a glitter of empty seltzer cans on the coffee table and the floor’s sticky in a way that only makes sense at house parties.

mina’s warm beside you. too warm. her thigh underneath yours, the pink fuzz of her sweater is soft against your skin, her nails painted a chipped neon green. they don't match the rest of her outfit, not at all, and you'd laughed at them in a snap voice memo earlier. but now you realise they suit her. in a way that almost everything does.

you’re tipsy. not dangerously so — just enough that you feel a little unzipped. light in the head. like your thoughts have been softened at the edges.

and her laugh, god her laugh, bursts beside you at something stupid someone says from across the room, and you barely register the joke.

because you’re looking at her again.

not in the way you as her friend, ride or die, partner in crime, should do—but like—

god.

she looks like sunlight in human form. like something soft that’s never been hurt. her skin glows in the dim kitchen light and her earrings catch the shimmer and her smile—

her smile.

you’d do anything for that smile.

and you must’ve looked too long, because she turns her head, meets your eyes. there’s something unreadable in hers. something thick and velvet and almost shy.

she's caught you staring. and you have no reason to. but suddenly it feels like the air is too heavy, the music is too quiet. because you've been caught.

so your mouth opens. to make a joke, maybe. to say something to make it all feel normal again.

but she leans forward and kisses you.

fast. soft. too quick to feel real.

it's like the soft reverence of trying to remember a dream you once had.

her hand grazes your jaw, so gently, so carefully.

delicately.

and then she’s pulling back like it burned her, like she’s terrified.

“shit,” she whispers but her mouth is still too close to yours, you can barely hear what she's saying because your eyes are too busy watching her lips, how her smile has dropped, but she still feels warm and safe, “i shouldn’t’ve—”

you don’t let her finish.

you pull her back in, one hand at the back of her neck, and kiss her like you’ve been waiting to your whole life.

this one lasts longer.

you can feel her smile against your mouth when she melts into you. her heart beat against your chest. taste the cherry of her drink on her lips, hear the flutter of her breath when your fingers curl into her sweater, and pull her closer.

like you'd drown without her to anchor you.

and she licks into your mouth and bites your lip and you sigh in what feels like something more than content. something that feels like the crashing of waves against the shore. something that feels like a late spring breeze.

it feels like her.

when you finally pull away, she’s still close, her eyes wide and bright and full of the kind of awe that makes your heart hurt.

you brush her hair from her face, gentle.

“i love your smile,” you tell her. because it's true.

she grins, too wide for her face. “you always say that.”

you smile too, eyes soft. “and i always mean it.”

outside, someone’s yelling about karaoke.

but inside, inside the world has shrunk to just the two of you.

to your knees touching. noses brushing. to the laughter catching in both your mouths like shared breath.

and for the first time in forever, it feels like you’re exactly where you’re supposed to be.

[mattsdivaa]

Walk home

Toughguy!matt x sweetheart!reader

And their you where in class just another Tuesday, matt already beat you to your desk you sat next to him to see he already started his worksheet the teacher had gave out “matt psss matt” you whisper tapping his shoulder not wanting to disturb the rest of the class you noticed the headphones in his ear, you pulled one out so hes forced to listen to you “what are your plans after school?” He looked at you just to see that big smile you always had on your face the one he loved but would never admit “probably gonna get high and skate with a couple friends” that’s when he seen that annoying look in your eye “no no you cannot come I won’t let you!” He whispers like he meant it “but come on mr.grumpyy I don’t have work today and I need something to do” he raised an eyebrow “you work?” You chuckled “you didn’t know that, I work at the record shop down the street from the skate park your always at” that’s when the bell rang “meet me at the back of the school when school ends I won’t wait for you, if your not their by the time im out their im leaving you.” You stand up grabbing your bag walking out with matt “ill be looking forward to it” he says grabbing your wrist before you could turn the corner to get to you next class, you give him a small head nod before you continued to walk.

AFTER SCHOOL

The clock had a minute before the bell rang, their you where standing up, the only kid that was standing and by the time the bell rang you sprinted out, the halls filled quick, you shoved and pushed to get to the back of the school. Out of breath and hands on your knees he was no where to be found “matt?” You say you turn around to see matt with a smirk on his face “kid you that desperate you beat me here” he starts laughing, you smack his head playfully “nothings funny Matthew” he stops laughing and puts his little nonchalant face on “don’t call me my full name, only my friends can”

As you guys walked you talked about many things.. or well you did and honestly you thought matt was listening but you realized his headphones where in so you decided to stop talking mid walk “why did you stop talking?” He says more of a mumble you turn and take one his earbuds to make sure he could hear you “didn’t know you where listening.” He gives you a smile before pointing to the skate park, he puts both hands on your shoulders “listen my friends can be dicks don’t let anything they say get to your head” you nod in response.

You see 3 boys “slump, Nate , and my brother Chris” matt introduces you to them “boys this is y/n” slump the one with long curly hair, blue eyes baggy cargos start to laugh “its the freak you spilled spaghetti on you matt” Chris stands up, Nate gets on his knees “oh my god im so sorry!” “What the fuck is wrong with you” they start recreating what had happened this day matt puts his board on the floor and skates over to them, face unreadable but his eyes sharp you can feel this shift in the air immediately, “ha ha very funny” matt says flatly, stopping infant of slump “ I think I remembered what happened” slumps grin falters “relax bro we where just messing around”

You sat down, you legs hanging in the bowl, slump smoking a cigarette, Chris sitting next to you Nate and matt skating in the bowl. Chris looks at you “you know as tough as matt acts hes like a big teddy bear” you glance at matt before you looked at Chris “matt. A teddy bear?” He chuckles “yeah he thinks he needs to be cool around them and everybody else but really hes a big softie. Stay around and he’ll let you see his teddy bear side” Chris stands up joining slump to smoke a cigarette. you glance at matt with a smile not taking you eyes off him.

They were fast, like really fast. Loud, reckless and so boyish it made you laugh when Nate tried to do an ollie and completely ate shit. “Yo matt you gonna write her name on your board next?” Slump and Nate teased “matts got a crush” Nate teased in a high pitched voice, matt stopped skating. He stood still in the middle of the lot, one foot on his board, then without looking at anyone he turned his head just slightly and stared at you. You.

Sitting on the floor, hoodie sleeves bunched in your first, the sun hitting your face, watching him like theirs no place you rather be. You tilted your head, gave him a small smile not big just enough to let him know you say him and that’s when it hit you. He likes you. He fucking likes you. Slump laughed again. “dude your staring” matt whipped around grabbing his board “eat shit.” Matt walks over to you “bored yet?” You shook you head “no not even a little but I got to start heading home” “you wanna head home” You nodded, stretching as you stood. “Yeah. My parents might think I’m dead.” “C’mon. I’ll walk you.”

THE WALK HOME

You both stopped at the corner where you had to split, your house a few blocks that way, his in the opposite direction. Matt stood there a second, kicking his board up and catching it, but he didn’t say goodbye. He just stared at the ground, lips parted like he wanted to say something, but didn’t know how to start. You took a step back, giving him the out. “See you tomorrow?”

He nodded slowly. “Yeah. Tomorrow. And you turned to walk away. But behind you, Matt stood there, eyes on your back as you walked down the street. His heart beat a little too fast, a little too loud. And for the first time in a long time, he wanted to chase something. But he didn’t. Not yet. He just whispered to himself, almost too quiet for the night to hear:

“Fuck.” Because now he knew he liked you And it scared the hell out of him.

Just reposting this so it’s a lil messy!!! Next part here

Taglist- @sturnsblogs @bernardsbendystraws @kenah-sturniolo @devotedlyteenagemusic @sarahsturnn @courta13 @kahlidosenotread @sheluvsthesturniolos @mattspillowprincess @sturns-mermaid @iluvchr1s @chrepsi @lifecansmd @sturniololovaa @chrepsi @aaliyah-sturns @sturnspup @mattsturluver @xsturnkay @angelxsturns @yuh13lo @chrisissos3xy @dandoonsturns @lyingonchris @sturniolo-szn2 @everythingaboutbags @norahsturns @idontneedaxanny2feelbetter

[ballad-of-birdy-lamb]

Helloo(⁠◍⁠•⁠ᴗ⁠•⁠◍⁠) Could I request for Bill Dickey x childhood friend!reader? where Bill and Y/N have been close since they were little kids (before his parents' divorce and before he got completely hooked on comics) You can go with either angst or comfort fluff, or both! whichever you feel works best for Bill’s character. I just really want to see how he’d act around someone who knew him before everything started falling apart.

It’d be a bonus if the reader is female, since Bill is known for being misogynistic, and it’d be interesting to see how he handles a long-time female friend. But totally up to you! I hope I’m not overwhelming you. Im guessing you probably get a lot of requests. Please take your time, and thank you so much for considering mine ^^

You were clearly meant for more.

Bill Dickey x Fem! Childhood friend! Reader angst/platonic headcanons Summary: You were one of the only people that had watched Bill change. Content warnings: misogynistic behavior Word count: 1k. AI was not used for the writing, please do not use any of this for AI. Welcome board Eltingville Club masterlist

‧₊˚✩彡‎♡‧₊˚

Being friends with Bill Dickey wasn’t something people wanted to be known for. He was annoying, mean, and gross. But you knew him for so long that it didn’t matter that those titles existed. You had met Bill in kindergarten, long before his obsession with comics began. He was a sweet kid, a little loud, but he was nice overall. You’d spend your time playing together, and at some point, were almost inseparable. You would help each other with schoolwork, random things you couldn’t do on your own, and personal issues. If there was a picture of close friends or best friends, it would show you and Bill. 

As the years went on, not much changed. Bill gradually got into comics more and more, simply telling you which ones he had recently read and how cool they were. Eventually, the Eltingville Comic Book, Science-Fiction, Horror, Fantasy, and Role-Playing Club was created; bringing Josh, Pete, and Jerry into your life. 

There’s isn’t much to say about the friendship after that, you didn’t always go to meetings once you realized that it wasn’t fully your thing. It’s not like you were forced to go or were invited. The meetings were the same thing over and over. They would say what they did over the week, what they got, what they made, what they agreed on, what they disagreed on. It was rather boring, and you didn’t fully understand the situation. 

You were “friends” with the other three, of course you could talk to them if they said something to you, but you weren’t proper friends. They had their obvious flaws; at times it was like they never interacted with any girls at all. Pete was weird about it the most, trying to flirt but it was really bad. Jerry was just quiet and kind of awkward. And Josh tried talking but was so inept that he would say something then get picked on by Bill for it. 

Several years went by again, Big Sal turned out to be a child molester and left the comic book shop up to Joe, some weirdo that would overprice everything and wouldn’t take anything but hyper specific types of currency. Hell, you don’t even think he takes coins. You never went into that shop unless you were forced to go with Bill. You didn’t think the prices were accurate to the piece, it felt warm and wet all the time, and sometimes the older guys that went there would smell funny. It wasn’t your thing... but it was Bill’s. 

People change over weeks and months, of course that was found with Bill. You didn’t fully know if it was Joe’s doing or Josh or Pete or even Jerry’s, but he kept saying weird stuff. You would be sitting with him for lunch, and he’d go on his usual tirade about how so many comic-to-film adaptations were terrible these days. He’d suddenly turn to you and ask if you thought a new superhero movie was accurate to the comics, and you’d just have to shrug. It would quickly be followed by a mumble about how you were a girl and wouldn’t even understand it like he could. 

The comments would get more prominent, even when you tell him to stop talking like that. Bill would find a loophole in your logic and say that it was general knowledge that girls didn’t know as much about comics and if they were into them, it was because they wanted someone. As much as you liked Bill, you couldn’t deny how weird he started to become. 

It was only when Bill went crazy with Joe’s comic book shop that you weren’t allowed around him anymore. At least it was easier to lose a friend like Bill that way instead of having to explain that he was annoying and not a good person. It wouldn’t have ended well anyway, he wouldn’t have understood. 

The final time you ever saw Bill was when you were a lot older, at comic con, to be exact. When you stopped talking to Bill and the rest of the Eltingville Club, you made your own time to settle into some “nerdy” hobbies. Whether that was comics, studio ghibli, or something beyond that, you found something new and fun. So, when Jerry found you at one of the tables, he couldn’t just leave you behind, you were occasionally there with the Club meetings, but it was enough to make an impact on him and the others. Josh and Pete weren’t too different than when they were teens; one had less hair, but that wasn’t important. 

You sat at one of the tables of the giant food court, adding in on Josh and Pete’s conversation from time to time. And then Bill arrived. The men had already turned to arguing, making you sit in your thoughts, reminding you of the group meetings. Finally, a deal was made to let him stay but it didn’t last long. When Jerry’s girlfriend, Mandi, tried getting Bill to shut up or own up to his own actions, it brought his immaturity again. 

By the time the con was over, Bill was left alone in the Ecto-1 with you. The silence was deafening and quite painful to sit in. You tried speaking before Bill interrupted you, going on about how you’re still the same or that you were rubbing your own success in his face. He went on and on about how you weren’t better than him, how you were just a dumb whore that liked acting like your success wasn’t because of your looks or your body. It hurt, obviously, but it made you realize something. He was still the same. There wasn’t anything that came out of his mouth that he didn’t say in high school; it was the exact same. Though you were forced to end your friendship with Bill by your parent's hand way back when, you were ultimately forced to end it now, stepping out of the car, and leaving Bill alone. 

‧₊˚✩彡‎♡‧₊˚

Thank you so much for requesting!! I'm sorry if it's OOC!!!!

[n1k0laa5]

Hi lovely!!!! (I hope it’s okay that I call you that)

I was wondering what your big smart beautiful brain thinks about disappointment and doubts.

Specifically how being disappointed or let down by people and yourself here can make doubts louder and way harder to ignore. And some affirmations/ reassurance things you might say to combat that.

I love this drawing I had to add it, im sorry 😭

Your Disappointment Isn’t Evidence. It’s A Story, Rewrite It.

SECTION ONE: disappointment is not proof. it’s just noise.

let’s start here. loud and clear. just because someone lets you down, flakes on you, ghosts you, talks shit about you, says you can’t shift, doesn’t believe in LOA, laughs when you affirm, or even if YOU wake up disappointed in yourself—that doesn’t mean a goddamn thing about your manifestations, your power, or your path.

you’re confusing stimulus with structure. you’re taking a response from the old system, something that came from your previous assumptions, and calling it evidence. but that’s not what it is. it’s residue. it’s a fart from your old state. it’s a shitty commercial on a channel you don’t even subscribe to anymore.

so here’s your first mindset rule: disappointment is not data.

it’s not the truth. it’s a triggered perspective that only feels real because your nervous system thinks it needs protection. and your job now is to say, “thank you for trying to keep me safe, but this? this is not my narrative anymore.”

SECTION TWO: when doubt gets loud, get louder.

doubt is not evil. it’s not some spiritual flaw. it’s not a sign that you’re failing. doubt is just a leftover process. it’s the mind trying to re-confirm what it already believes based on past evidence. and guess what? your past has nothing to do with your current state.

you’re not manifesting from memory. you’re manifesting from assumption. you’re not building a reality based on yesterday’s heartbreak or failure. you’re building it from the fucking code you’re running right now.

and that means when doubt comes knocking, you don’t need to argue with it like a sad little therapist. you override it. you declare the new rule.

when your brain goes: “what if it doesn’t work?”

you go: “bitch, it already worked.”

when your chest tightens like “what if it’s just me and I’m stuck?”

you go: “i’m not stuck. i’m shifted. this is just lag.”

when the spiral says, “no one’s showing up for me…”

you say: “they don’t need to. i show up for me. and my world follows.”

affirmations aren’t bandaids. they’re override commands. you don’t say them to feel better—you say them to replace the wiring that creates the doubt in the first place.

SECTION THREE: people are not god in your story. YOU are.

this is what most people miss when disappointment hits. they go “why didn’t THEY believe in me?” or “why did THEY make me feel this way?” as if those people are writing the script.

newsflash: they’re not.

no one outside of you has any actual say in what you experience. people mirror your assumptions. they respond to your dominant state. and when someone disappoints you, it’s not because they hold power—it’s because, on some level, your story let them.

that doesn’t mean it’s your fault. it means you get to change it.

if your mom doesn’t believe in your shifting? cool. she’s a background character with one line.

if your friend rolls their eyes when you affirm? cool. that’s their scene. not yours.

if you feel like no one understands you or believes in you? perfect. use that shit. make it your villain origin story. go full main character and say “i am the only one who decides what’s true. and my reality submits to me.”

the moment you stop needing others to validate your path is the moment your path fucking explodes in power.

SECTION FOUR: disappointment in YOURSELF hurts harder. here’s how to fix it.

okay, deep breath.

we gotta talk about this one.

because being let down by people sucks. yeah. but being let down by YOURSELF? hurts on a whole other level. especially when you feel like you’ve been trying. you’ve been consistent. you’ve done all the inner work. and nothing’s budged. or maybe it has, but not enough. and you start questioning your worth. your ability. your identity as a “master manifestor.”

listen to me: you don’t need to be perfect to be powerful.

you don’t need to wake up every day feeling like an embodiment guru. you don’t need to affirm with angelic precision. you don’t need to love yourself unconditionally every second.

you just need to keep choosing the new story. again and again.

not perfectly. not obsessively. not even convincingly.

just persistently.

and yeah. some days, you’ll fuck up. some days, you’ll spiral. some days, you’ll scream “WHERE IS IT?” at the ceiling while eating chips on the floor. and that doesn’t disqualify you from your desires. that makes you real.

you are allowed to be messy.

you are allowed to be pissed.

you are allowed to feel like nothing’s working and STILL BE RIGHT.

because the shift doesn’t happen when you feel perfect.

it happens when you decide your feelings don’t define the truth anymore.

SECTION FIVE: affirmations to slap doubt in the face

• “i don’t give a fuck how i feel. i said it’s done. so it’s done.”

• “doubt is not evidence. it’s just noise.”

• “i am allowed to have off days and still manifest everything.”

• “i don’t wait for belief. i declare and belief follows.”

• “i am not ruled by emotion. i am ruled by decision.”

• “i am not a person hoping for change. i AM the change.”

• “the 3D doesn’t speak for me. i speak for the 3D.”

• “i am the god of this story. not the audience.”

and if all else fails:

• “i don’t care if i feel like shit. i still get what i want.”

because that’s the truth.

your feelings? can change in a second.

your thoughts? aren’t always yours.

but your power to declare truth and refuse to back down?

that’s what changes timelines.

FINAL WORD: don’t confuse resistance with regression.

you are allowed to feel disappointed.

you are allowed to doubt.

you are allowed to collapse for five minutes and scream into a pillow and then stand up and say:

“okay. that was fun. now back to reality. my reality.”

you don’t need to beat your old thoughts.

you just need to starve them.

stop feeding them attention.

stop thinking they mean something.

stop calling them “blocks” when they’re just echoes.

and stop giving your power to other people. to feelings. to triggers. to the part of you that was taught to doubt everything good.

you don’t need to be healed to manifest.

you just need to decide that disappointment is not your god.

you are.

[kosmicdream]

Comic endings & 2025 GOALS!

i am NEARLY done with chapter 17 of FFAK. it was originally twice as long but i cut it in half, so it wouldnt end up as another 900 page chapter. After this chapter is done (maybe in sept?), im going to take a short hiatus from FFAK (and nrd) to finally fucking finish my "Teacher & The Fairy" short story that i started in uh.. i guess the comic project started at least 5 years ago but part two has been in limbo since 2021. Ive honestly struggled a lot with the story over the years as it both got too big and i still wasn’t quite sure what I wanted to keep in the story or how I wanted to resolve it. Originally, it was one part. Then it had to be two, but as I’ve made two it felt stressful to know that it would probably end up 3. That kinda made everything sit in a standstill for a long time. This project isn’t like..one of my big ones obviously - but its still part of a larger goal of mine to get better at writing shorter, more compact comics to practice with storytelling as well as endings. So having it grow & grow was fun creatively but not my goal. I also had so many other comic duties to do, it was put on the backburner along with 23953095 other stories..

..Speaking of those, its kind of sad to say but at the moment I’ve officially/unofficially decided that all other comics besides FFAK & NRD are now on permanent hiatus/dropped. (Not including the ffak bonus chapters, which I do intend to return to in some form.) It was probably already a bit obvious that they were stuck in limbo anyway, but at this point I think it's much better for me to just really let go of them and focus on what is most important. There’s always “maybe i’ll come back to them somedays” because i DO have all the other comics written/outlined in some capacity.. (Save for Praeymoon, which is both a project about short stories and also part of a much larger narrative as well) ..But i still can’t really promise that’s ever going to happen when I still have newer ideas i’m more interested in pursuing. Or older/larger projects I’d rather dedicate my effort towards finishing. Even as I write this, its much more likely I might attempt to start “Religion of Toy” rather than return to “Eggshells”, “Replacer”, “The Eyes of Miasma” “Praeymoon” ..ect.. Which is fickle, i know! But that sort of is how creative endeavors go sometimes. I also will say, while I’m sure those series did have some readers and people who really looked forward to more of the stories (sorry ;;) - I’m mostly making this creative change so I can focus on NRD & FFAK which I’m sure everyone (myself included!) is more invested in and want to see conclude. Those two comics are still my #1 priority.. Yes.. both of them at the same time, somehow.. (its like impossible to place FFAK or NRD as #1, because while i’d be inclined to say FFAK - nrd is much CLOSER to being completed by a long shot.. So in a way it is #1.. But like gun to my head of course i’d pick FFAK.. so.. They both are just going to be #1. I have two hands!! Except I only have one that can draw. Alas.)

That being said, “The Teacher & The Fairy” will be my next goal to complete! and hopefully will accomplish this in this short hiatus from FFAK/NRD. If I just set aside a little time, I can make the decisions needed to wrap the story up in part 2. It might not be like this perfectly paced ending I intended - but the story has already gone through a lot of revisions that it never really has followed the intended path for it anyway.. I am expecting this to take like 2 months or something. 

The reason why I decided not to drop this comic along with the others, is that its still a fairly simple one and one of the “newer” comic projects I’ve had. I still feel a lot more relevance in my life with the themes in the story. I still think part1 of the comic is probably the best example of pacing done in a chapter for probably any of my comics, which is part of what set this like.. Perfectionist standard for myself to follow up with something just as strong as that. I’ll be honest, I don’t normally get as caught up in that sort of thing with my comics because I know its a losing battle - but part 1 really worked out WAY better than I expected that I really wanted to really make something polished and impressive.. Which lead me to feeling nothing WAS good enough and feeling disappointed with myself LMAO

IDK if part two and the ending will like.. Be as good as the first, at least in my eyes.. But I look forward to being able to cross SOMETHING off my list that I always wanted to finish. Sadly, for my other comics - they’d still require a lot more than even 1 or 2 chapters to finish.. Some even more than that.. And that kind of like, commitment just isn’t realistic for me anymore at least when I’m working IRL at my day job. I have much more limited time to spare for my comics than I used to and have for several years now, but even tho I draw fast its not the same as having unlimited artistic free time to dedicate to multiple webs of comics. Even then, it was more than I could handle anyway without feeling like I was never getting anywhere because I was spreading myself too thin. Too distracted by new passing ideas, unable to get back into the right rhythm for older ones by jumping around too much and all that sorts of things. Ofc I still love all the old stories and concepts I have had along the way and even the smallest ones have helped develop me as a storyteller and artist, but y’kno. Thems the breaks..

ALSO when i am finished with part2 of Fairy comic.. I will likely go back to FFAK for chapter 18! As.. I still need some “emotional processing” time for NRD.. MAYBE by the time the fairy comic is done, I will feel different.. But it is more likely that I will just continue with another FFAK chapter as that one was technically supposed to be THIS one.. And I feel a lot more like, prepared & organized for going forward with that chapter. ALL of arc2 for FFAK is very organized vrs the rest of NRD.. which puts NRD in kind of a funny place to me, ATM.

 I used to have a pretty “clear” idea on how many chapters of NRD were left exactly and.. Now I kind of dont know anymore. I definitely know what NRD ch9 will be, but I’m still having to figure out the pacing of the rest of the comic and make some final decisions on certain plotlines. I have written and rewritten many things, always kind of circling around more or less the original ideas -but since the final leg of this story is almost like.. Bleeds into each other events-wise, it makes it a bit difficult to know how many chapters it will take. NRD 7 & 8 were the longest nrd chapters and were also meant to jsut be “one” chapter. I am VERY satisfied and happy with how chapter 8 ended and where the comic is right now - so its probably the best time for me to take this creative break so I can get a better plan in mind so the rest of the comic can go along smoothly. 

THAT is also why I wanted to finish the Fairy comic, to help force me to challenge these.. Perfectionist aspects that keep me in paralysis mode. I have a habit of adding adding adding, and if a scene feels and is good to think about - I will still want to pursue drawing it even if it just adds to the length of the comic. Its clear, i could keep going with anything and always find a reason for digging deeper into a story/world, but that isn’t effective when you actually want to move on to other things or like. Reach some kind of emotional closure for something. Hilariously, I feel way more organized and satisfied with FFAK’s ending - which will take me many years to reach - than this final leg of NRD which will still take me at least a couple years.. But is much closer to completing even WHILE working on FFAK at the same time.

I just turned 35, which means .. I’ve been making comics I guess, for 14ish years. Technically longer, but I “started” eggshells at 21. FFAK is already almost 11 and NRD is .. SHIT! Its 7. I forgot to celebrate its birthday. UMMM well, its old too. Wow!

What was I saying? Oh right. Im getting old yall!! I want to finish some stuff already jeez!!!! I am not tired of anything but you know. It feels good to get stuff I planned actually made, as it frees up my weak mind to think about other stuff. I am definitely in a weird like.. New era of my work I think. Not bad weird, just very different. I feel a bit like.. Alien to my older self, or what I thought of myself as an artist.. And thats good! I mean, I’m welcoming this shift and it feels very natural at the same time. While all these goals of mine feel daunting, like finally cleaning out a car garage, I am good at sticking to at least.. Certain commitments. FFAK and NRD are proof of that, as they’ve basically been running non-stop since they started. FFAK did have its longest hiatus of like, technically 1 year - which is wild but you know. NRD had to have its time to shine. What’s also interesting, is that every year since NRD started- I have completed at least one chapter for that series! Wow! 

Okay, this post is very long btu that’s basically all i wanted to say and felt like getting some ideas off my chest about my goals with the rest of this year. Somehow writing things out like this helps me feel like I’m committing to a plan and its less nebulous in my mind. Plus I like “checking in” with everyone, if they feel like reading it or not. 

Have a great.. ! monday? -Kosmic

[postmortemvp]

wip whenever ₍^. .^₎⟆

i got tagged by @chromecore and for once i do have a few things worth sharing.

ive lost track of who has or hasn't been tagged for it recently, so i'll leave it open to anyone who wants to do it too!! i love seeing what people are working on.

i'll start first with a personal modding project. i've been on the hunt for a place that would fit what i have in mind for Vanessa's apartment, since none of the player ones are quite what i'm looking for. i finally settled on the one Anna Hamill uses in Watson, the layout's cute and just the right size overall.

so last night i've started emptying it in cleaning it, and hopefully i'll be able to work on redecorating it today ꒰ᐢ. .ᐢ꒱₊˚⊹

the progress so far. i'm gonna swap it for a nicer (bigger) bed too. and i might have to recolor some of the furniture myself, babygirl deserves more pink in her life.

i've also spent some time cleaning up the apartment on top of KAB Tools for the hivemind of the kowalski korner, because this place sure was nasty.

⌢⌢⌢⌢⌢⌢⌢⌢⌢⌢⌢⌢⌢⌢ next up, writing. that one makes me a little nervous i guess, particularly because i haven't shared my writing publicly in years, particularly not in english. and on top of that, im not a big fic writer, my bread and butter has always been (very) long form roleplay, which is a very different beast.

so be nice to me pwease. it's only a barely edited excerpt so far, meant to go with my last vanny/mike shippy saturday vp ૮ ˶´ ᵕˋ ˶ა

"Something's bothering you." No question there, merely an observation, and the way her shoulders ever so slightly stiffen is the only answer he really needs. In any other situation, being right would've brought him a sense of smug satisfaction, a smirk or teasing quip in tow. Tonight, however, he finds himself almost wishing he had been wrong, or simply blissfully ignorant. Mike Kowalski has been called many things throughout the years—asshole, bastard and other colorful expletives—but heartless? Absolutely fucking not (not that he remembers at least), and he sure ain't planning on making this a first. "Wanna talk about it?" he adds after a beat, absentmindedly running his still 'ganic fingers up and down her spine, following the familiar lines etched into her skin. He only has to close his eyes to clearly picture it, the way the ink so sharply frames the middle of her back, down to the curve of her ass, and—well, maybe now's not the time to be thinking about that. "Not really." She shifts her weight from one foot to the other, the back of her thighs still resting against the side of the counter-top. Oh, Vanessa has never been hard to read, quite the open book when it comes to her emotions. Even for someone whose sole reading material as of late has been Regina Jones' gig rundowns. Usually, he'd take that as the metaphorical door being closed for good, probably wouldn't even have considered opening it himself in the first place. Except it's not just any door—she's not just anyone. He knows her, he realizes, and it's not just about how nicely her tits fit against his palms or what kind of cute noises he can coax out of her when she's lying under him anymore. No, it's about the crease that always forms between her brows when she's thinking too hard about something and the way she bites the inside of her cheek when she has more to say but doesn't know if she should keep going.

i may not be able to finish it today like i had hoped, but hopefully soon. i'd like to include their mutual use of polish when speaking to each other (i have a soft spot for people using terms of endearment in other languages) but that will have to wait. both because i want it to feel natural, and i also want it to be accurate. Ი︵𐑼

[ghetto-omega]

‎‧‎❀‎✿❀Omegaverse Culture Overview❀✿❀

𑁍 warning.. I am.. African American... Never been outside the US, so I can really only speak on the culture around me. If people wanna weigh in on culture from other places please do. Actually, I'm begging, I'm rolling over, I'm listening please please please please please please please please please please volunteer your own headcanons. 𑁍

This will be a short overview of a lot of things, so it's just gonna be a lot of thoughts and not a lot of depth. However I am planning on actually making an indepth post about each one of these topics.

With that being said...

‎‧₊˚✿Food✿˚₊‧

𑁍just general food headcanons𑁍

The omega stereotype is craving carbs and sweet foods, specifically because of what they're like after heats. Most energy during heat is depleted, so in order to get their stamina back they have to eat all of carb heavy foods

The alpha stereotype is craving tough or crunchy foods, because of their ruts. With biting instincts ramped up they tend to want things that are harder to chew through. It's like the equivalent of putting a live cricket in a spider enclosure because they want the stimulation from hunting their food

Carb and protein filled foods tend to be stocked in most houses. Especially filling carbs. Families are typically very large, with multiple generations all living within walking distance or in the same house. Keeping dense foods stocked is important to keep everyone fed

Pups in particular tend to have slightly stricter diets because their stomach isn't built for handing some foods until at least their preteen years

‎‧₊˚✿Names✿˚₊‧

𑁍naming your children, as well as derogatory names𑁍

I think that people would tend to name their kids after items that smell good, their favorite foods, other family members, plants, and religion

I also think they'd be a fan of situational names as well as generational names

For example, have three kids, one being named Sunday (situational, born on a Sunday), Suzie (maybe a pack members or a family members name), and Sumiya but her nickname is sushi, and all of the names starting with "su" makes the names generational.

You could even expand on that and have all the packs kids names be something like suki, sumirah, summer, summo, ect. Giving you a quite literal generation of names. (<- my family did this ! All the girls names end in "ah" and all the boys end in "en or on")

I can also see a kid being named something like Foxglove, Cedar, Jasmine, or even something like Honey or Teatree, because that's what the parent's mate smells like

I think calling an omega a "slick dripper" or a "slick house" is uhm... Not exactly a slur but it's not something you should say.

I think that married betas and omegas are told they are "Collared". It's typically derogatory, but there are exceptions. I think the alpha equivalent would be "Bitched", which is basically always derogatory

I think some people call betas "baren" or "scentless". Once again, not a slur, but definitely something close to it lol

‎‧₊˚✿Housing✿˚₊‧

𑁍pack houses and their differences𑁍

There's two different notable styles of home. There's a regular house, and a pack house

Pack houses don't have too much of a difference, but they are larger and tend to follow similar layouts. With one floor being taken up with giant meeting rooms and similarly size kitchens, as well as at least one bathroom with either a huge tub or multiple small ones. The upstairs floor(s) tend to house all the bedrooms and a few smaller on suite bathrooms

Some pack houses are essentially just mini mansions, completely with a few different wings of the house all marked by a different meeting room

And the term "meeting room" is also a difference. They're essentially just big living rooms. Why is there a different name, isn't that a bit pretentious? You ask. Bc some guy who thought he was better than everyone else coined the term pack house and decided there needed to be a difference, for some reason

‎‧₊˚✿Families/Packs✿˚₊‧

‎𑁍general pack headcanons𑁍

Big families !!! Huge families even !! Families that take up entire neighborhoods or culdesacs !!

Conversations between kids where they ask how many mom's someone has is common !! Kids ask their parents why their friend gets to have 5 dads but they only get to have 2 !!

Not everyone's parents are romantic !! Some are just part of the same pack !!

In my personal au I use prime omegas and prime alphas, but they're just titles for the leaders of the pack. Even then, modernly they aren't doing much leading. It's more event planning, pupsitting, tie breaking lol, things like that

Your primes do not have to be mates or anything. It's just about who's the most reliable and level headed. Oftentimes, anybody who stays home for most or all of the day falls to this roll by default

‎‧₊˚✿Clothing✿˚₊‧

𑁍a few clothing headcanons𑁍

Collars aren't typically worn outside casually. Typically they have a cause. Whether it's newly weds, protests, covering scent glands, or some secret 4th thing, they typically have a purpose.

Honestly this whole section would need to be it's own post for me to do it justice tbh

Clothes that "trap scent" are pretty commonly worn. They're made of a light but thick fabric that cinches or cuffs around the scent glands and they often comes in matching sets. This is especially common in omega targeted gym wear, but there are sets made for everyone

Nuns also typically wear this type of garment

‎‧₊˚✿Other✿˚₊‧

𑁍miscellaneous headcanons𑁍

Gift giving is very important. Specifically, giving food is very important (I am biased, I am a very food orientated and motivated person). Giving someone food they don't like by accident is alright, but if you know they don't like it, and give it to them? Disrespectful.

So I'm semi familiar with the Christian Bible, I grew up going to church (<- religious trauma haver). You know how a lot of people draw Jesus as white even though he very much wasn't ?? Yeah I think people claim Jesus was an alpha, but he was a beta and there's overwhelming evidence in the Bible to show he was beta and people just ?? Ignore that bc they want to lol

Some people are born with animal features, some aren't. The place you were born in + your parents (and maybe a little plot relevant magic lol) determines what type of features you get. People who live in deserts or next to mountains are often born with horns or scales, while tropical and temperate climates tend to be born with more feathers and furry features

Heat blockers/suppressants as well as rut blockers/suppressants can only be prescribed by doctors. Giving them out or selling them can land you in prison post haste, but they're also so hard to get your hands on that the market of people buying them counterfeit grows everyday, despite the complications and risks

Blockers and suppressants can lead to fertility issues as well as immune issues, particularly in omegas, but don't count out anyone with ruts either, it's just less common. Lots of people on blockers are immunocompromised

Scent/pheromone blockers on the other hand, are much easier to come by, especially because they sell patches right over the counter. Though, if you wanted a much more discreet pill you would need to get those prescribed as well. It is particularly hard for omegas to get them prescribed, as usual

And that's it for now U⁠^⁠ｪ⁠^⁠U

This post is basically just a giant reminder for me to write about these topics in depth. Just a whole lotta surface level thoughts. I also didn't cover weddings, holidays, mating rituals, social climate, etc. so I'll have to do separate posts on those

This took a bit longer than I wanted bc I am uhm. Suicidal lol. And then there's the drake v Kendrick beef and I've been fixated on it. Like I fr don't even like K dot that much I've just always hated Drake fuck that nga !!!

If you see a spelling mistake... No you didn't...