#im sure it hurts the few people who care and who thought i'd actually go on to do things to see me constantly wallowing for reasons

[chemicalbrew]

achievement get (for the billionth time): take one look at an assignment and get severely overwhelmed AND discouraged for the rest of the day and do nothing

[w98pops]

TW: SUICIDE MENTION, VIOLENCE

i knew i said i would take a little break, but ive been mentally declining a lot and drawing my silly guys is my way of coping. I never actually properly drew Wendy from 2301, so im filling in the blanks.

I'd like to think of her as a person who never actually... grows up. She just kinda gets taller and more sad over time. Wendy was always very vulnerable but cheerful, and House kinda groomed her into a serious and politically aware person, still unbelievably vulnerable but a viable subject nonetheless. I always had this problem with writing her relationship with another canon character, no one realistically would give a fuck about her and her opinions. Sure, maybe Arcade will pity Wendy because she's "stupid" from a neurotypical point of view, but other than that, she doesn't have any weight in any political conversation that's going on in the Mojave. So I made her really fucking stubborn. Annoyingly so. Wendy just... gets the job done. She's resourceful, efficient and very easy to manipulate. A perfect fit for a House's courier, I think. She doesn't question his orders, she does not care for consequences as long as she has House as her cover (a trait she inherited from her step-father) and she's sometimes sociopathic and numb to voices of empathy. Not in a "edgelord murder killer girl" way but more like. She doesn't see people who hurt her as humans. A coping mechanism that would probably be the end of her, sometime in the future. I mean, she did confront Benny and got really physical. There was no way she could've win a fight against a grown ass man, and Benny did beat the shit out of her, but in the end he was the one with a cracked open skull. I just like to think that her pure madness and helplessness was enough to fuel her mind and overpower something she had no chance against in the first place. SPEAKING OF CHANCE. That's why I think she would totally get along with Chance, the Khan from the comic. I don't really put a thought about how he would've survived or joined her, but they're pretty much soulmates. They have very different backgrounds, personalities, literally anything, but Chance recognises her rage. Her inability to do what's right and the constant fight against unfightable (?) circumstances she's facing every day. I'd like to think he's autistic too. As a treat.

So yeah, she's super uncertain about anything in her life, and that makes her a very useful tool in the hands of a right man. Mr. House mastefully manipulated her personality in a conventional way, taught her the secret and mysterious knowledge of "masking" and sat her down for a few years to teach her ways of the capital and created this really sad but smart and charismatic politician with no real political voice whatsoever. She's also very cute and sweet looking so yeah. He made himself a Tandi. 😭😭 Also he scanned her brains, which would totally not be a big plot point for the future.

Almost perfect, but Sharky is here too, for some reason. He's the biggest pain in the House's ass since Benny. He has a certain emotional intellect, not easy to bribe or manipulate in mental or physical way, he really fucking cares for his sister, and is very aware of the things The Big Guy does to her. See, Sharky wasn't raised by his sister, she was a child herself at that time, and his mother didn't play much role either, too busy bickering with Aletus and then later too busy drinking and fucking in Gomorrah. Sharky was raised by the Strip and the rules of Wasteland. He might not be the smartest guy alive, but emotionally he's mature beyond belief. He's very observant, empathetic and cunning person. Even tho he was mute most of his childhood because of child neglect and untreated autism, he has incredible social skills and a Yes-man in his basement he found while renovating the Tops. He has a plan. Not a good one, but a plan nonetheless.

I have so much OC material I'm ought to write a fanfic. Or a comic, idk. In my dreams, sure, but it's still refreshing to talk about my ocs and draw them, and recieving feedback and praise for my storytelling skills 😭😭😭 it means a lot. Thank you all for reading this far!!!

[faunabel]

i took a nap! and my dream was long (well, not really) and complicated.

soo... dream journal time!

oh shit i dont know how to do the read more on mobile well pretend this has a read more and maybe if we imagine hard enough the tumblr gods will put one here

JK im on desktop later here's a read more

it involved me talking on discord to one of my mutuals ^-^ who i was nervous wanting to Impress. and they said england is hot and i was taken aback (sort of. more complicated than that but whatevs.) but also like u arent wrong. england is overhated these days i would maybe date or sleep with him is all im saying. i was speaking to a few diff mutuals on discord but especially excited/nervous to speak to this one.

blurry for a second.

and then a dog pounced on me. and this little old lady ran a training school i was for some reason in. but it was a Psychological training school meant to strengthen your mind apparently. it was popular in canada so i was excited one opened up down here for some reason. they had one where i used to live in florida so i was happy they had one in my new state, and with dream logic i'd moved 0.2 seconds ago so yknow. and the lady was training a lot of animals especially a dog and this one dog was not well trained so he bit onto my arm, and i stood there in horror for a few seconds, not wanting to move to do minimal damage, until she came and bitched at him for acting up, so he let go. and she was like yeah this is why i run a training school.

and her house was tiny so it was in her backyard. she had me follow her to the back where it looked like a dog park. all dirt and dust and equipment. no grass. i thought it looked nice in the dream altho now that im awake it looked pretty crap. but actually i thought it was nostalgic like playgrounds u go to as a kid. it looked like a dog park. also apparently she hammered in one of the rules for me. i forget what it was exactly but later she specified it was related to "the treadmills."

suddenly it was no longer me but a group of people who were all friend and who i identified as being friends with. but i myself was no longer there. and these people were eager to try out the equipment.

tw body horror for this part

pretty sure this is impossible irl but for one of them, this girl pushed her two friends down onto this sheet of barbed wire, and i guess what's supposed to happen is that it pierces your outer layer of skin, but she pushed way too hard and pierced many layers of skin. what you're supposed to do is pierce a few and pull yourself off. it hurts and builds your pain tolerance. the old lady was like oh shit i fixated so much on explaining how to be careful on the treadmills that i forgot this. and the people on the barbed wire were in pain slowly ripping through each layer of skin to minimize the damage. they accidentally leaned back in Pain so their arms also got attached but just the few outer layers so it only hurt a bit to pull them off. like stinging pin pricks. totally tolerable but still unpleasant.

the girl had been so excited btw she just shoved them down hard and didn't realize it would cause problems. i could feel the pain and fear of these people it was ouchie.

also i was trapped consciously. strapped down. unable to move unless i agonizingly ripped spiky metal through my skin all at once to get away. i have many nightmares abt being trapped lol.

then randomly the mlpfim ponies showed up. and they started triggering my severe emetophobia which i dont even wanna talk abt. it was more hinted at than anything but i was scared being trapped like that. also a common theme in my nightmares.

then fluttershy who felt Ill decided to go upstairs (we were suddenly in a basement but also not really bc the initial house had stairs too and was bigger and fancieron the inside than it seemed. that bitch had an aquarium against the wall. and fancy dark wood.) to make food for the others and herself to feel better. and since this dream was like a movie "i" the consciousness followed her upstairs to watch her. and she prepared something that had marshmallows on top i think.

and then i woke up.

also at some point the people strapped down were jeremy and candance from pnf i think. or timmys mom and dad. my brain smashed a bunch of junk together.

[bonefall]

God ive been reading through your rewrites and im totally obsessed. I've had so many similar ideas about cooking and i get so excited looking at your ideas. I have my own cat system and story idea set outside of the warriors Universe I've been working on for years now and reading your ideas gives me tons of inspo. Theyre an incredibly useful respurce for worldbuilding

Also this is totally unrelated to literally anything, but what are your thoughts on Jaggedtooth / Snag? He was Rowanclan's mentor and a major Tigerstar supporter

Also, does Antpelt have any kin in this rewrite? In the original series I beleive he is an "orphaned" kit. I'm a sucker for Ant x Breeze but i've also recently come up with a headcannon / au where he is brought in and is apart of Smokey's litter with Onestar. The reason he brought Any in and not Dark was because Ant was deathly ill and Onestar pretended Ant was a random orphaned kit that hid mate decided to surrogate. I have absolutely no idea how the litters line up with canon though so 🤷

Thanks for the compliment! I'm glad it's helped get the creative juices flowing!

On Antpelt

He is an Orphan Warrior in the main series by my definition, yep! He has no official siblings or parents. I haven't figured out who his parents are going to be yet, though, only because I haven't completely redone WindClan's family tree yet.

In fact I only have a few things truly confirmed for WindClan's family tree right now.

The first is that Onestar has no siblings. He's the son of Larksplash and Cloudrunner, and his mother died in childbirth, which is how he got the name Onekit.

The second is that Mudclaw's children are the first born at the lake; and they are half-Clan, from him and Whitewater. Whitewater was going to invoke the Queen's Rights, but after the failed rebellion she felt wrong about her two oldest kits and gave them to Torear to raise. Those kits were Kestrelflight and Harespring; she kept the last one, Owlclaw.

Soooooo basically Antpelt's nowhere right now. I'll hook him up when I work on the tree next; but Onestar's only child is going to be Heathertail, and maybe Galekit, but they're going to stay dead.

Jaggedtooth

I really like Jaggedtooth and Nightwhisper. They both always struck me as people Tigerstar actually HATES, but keeps them around because they're useful.

I'm fond of how far Jag was willing to go for him, cutting off one of his own fingers to get Tigerstar into a better position, only to be snubbed. I'd join BloodClan too after that fuck you Tigerstar get divided loser

I know Jaggedtooth's generally used as a villain, but it's more fitting to my narrative for him to be a bit more sympathetic. For the story I'm trying to tell, Clan Culture is supposed to be a constant antagonist, especially for this time period where Fire Alone is not established. Runningnose is being buffed up into an actual villain, meaning there's no need for Snag to do the false sign with his severed claw.

So for my rewrite, Jaggedtooth,

Is an ok mentor to Rowanpaw. Rowan is now the daughter of Brokenstar, but Jaggedtooth doesn't care and she finds that refreshing.

What really hurts her is when Jaggedtooth leaves, as he was the closest thing to a father she ever had.

Rowan's first mentor is killed in the epidemic. Not sure who it is yet though.

Anyway Jaggedtooth rejoins BloodClan, and either goes back to the name Snag or shortened it to Jagged/Jag.

[rex101111]

I'd love to see some commentary on Swipes of Sword and Fan, I'm curious when it comes to more variety-type fics where the inspiration for different chapters comes from and the like. And here's a ⭐ for anything you'd like to talk about in general about whatever!

Thank you!! Looking back im actually pretty proud of this little collection im slowly building up, though to be honest I didn't give it too much thought when I started.

It started out as a bit of a joke, the first chapter was basically just me posting one of the drabbles I sometimes write when somebody sends me a quick description. I just rolled with the premise while staying as close to those two crazy criminals as I could. I posted it as the first chapter of a "collection" half jokingly as an affectionate jab at a trend in fanfiction that is kinda dead these days but was damn near impossible to avoid just a few years back.

People taking an entire prompts list, anywhere from thirty to a hundred, and using that to make a chronologically loose collection of stories based entirely around one ship or group. A select few went the distance and did the whole bunch, but most of them stopped at around the 15 mark. Which is plenty impressive, sure, but it always struck me as evidence that fanfic writers have an awful little habit of biting off more than they can chew.

A habit I'm sure long time readers of my work will no doubt know that I share. The amount of times I said "IM GONNA MAKE A LONG FIC OUTTA THIS ONE JUST YOU WATCH" to myself only to get distracted later on by scheduling issues or just getting attached to another idea... Ah well.

So, yeah, I posted that first chapter as a bit of a jab at myself "oh yeah sure im going to make a collection out of this, the whole nine yards!...probably gonna make it an even 30, be surprised if it hits 15", and the first few chapters came to me like lightning. Since I established the setting in the summary, I pretty much gave myself the freedom to make any story I wanted so long as it was in that very vaguely defined period of time.

Any story. Any at all. Whatever weird idea came to my head with these two that I could fit on two-three pages. I kinda went nuts. Most chapters were born from a quick idea I had like "hey so what if anji got jealous?" or "how do they deal with bounties anyway?" and others I had to really sit with like "...what were Baiken's parents like?" or "tying shoes must be a pain in the ass" or "oh hey what if Anji actually did feel guilty and afraid of his actions hurting the one person he cared about" and so on.

It's gotten to the point where I'm actually fairly certain I will hit that 30 chapter mark at some point. I'm not putting myself on any time line, I just post whenever I have a suitably dense and short story I wanna add. And boom.

and im gonna use the star as a chance to rant a little about how petty I personally can be about comments. First off, I love getting any kinda comment at all, if its a simple "OH MY GOD I LOVE THIS" or something along those lines, I will gobble it up like its delicious because it is.

But! Personally speaking if you really wanna make me happy as a writer, I really REALLY like those comments that pick a sentence or a segment and go "OH I REALLY LIKE THIS PART HERE'S A QUICK RANT WHY". Been this way since I wrote weird OC shit on DeviantArt back in the day, craving that very specific "you did good" validation.

Seriously tho, if a reader doesn't have it in them to write a Formal Review of my fanfic I'm not gonna hold it against them. I probably won't answer because I'm honestly genuinely awkward like that. But the dopamine shot of "Comment on AO3" lasts longer if the comment is also longer, you know? I've read comments that made me dance in place and pump my fists like I won a marathon. that shit rocks and readers who take the time to indulge my need for overly specific praise are a treasure.

[mothlegs]

eurgh

dreamt basil abused me :/ or dreamt that i dreamt it? idk. it was all the same as before. i was still finding ways to take all the blame so he wouldn't have to change or ever be in the wrong

and like. i definitely did suck severely but so did he and i was the only one taking any kind of responsibility, just like irl

gehh. stupid dream

it was like. he left a message for me on amino that he was going to sleep and i should put that in my discord status and we'd talk in the morning? and cause i'm still a stupid loyal dog i did that. his profile picture was blue and his username started with knee ..??

but. in the dream i dreamt he sexually assaulted and i think physically abused me too? i was talking to someone about it, about how my real vision/memories had high contrast and the dream ones were the same just in grey. i wondered if it wasn't just a dream (i know it is irl since i never met him in person)

we fought, physically, for a while. think there was glass and knives involved. i triggered him on purpose and accused him of race faking and faking being jewish? which? irl he is white and Not jewish? i was doing it just to hurt him, i said that to the other person later, and it felt like this big revelation that would fix everything. i used to have those all the time, i'd realise something that could he viewed as being my fault and i'd immediately do everything i could to change, because he wouldn't change and i somehow thought that if i just did everything, that would make him care about me, would make him stop hurting me. god damn stupid i was

other dream stuff. i was friends with this guy whose brother was intellectually disabled? and it was the brothers birthday so i was invited. not a lotta other people were, just a few kids his age (6-8 idk)

they were like. rich.? and somehow i ended up. erughh just remembered what happened next. i somehow ended up babysitting the kid, his? her? idk im saying his- his name was tay, and he also had some movement related disabilities and i think food related ones too

i got along w this kid really well, he used AAC and even at the party i seemed to be the one including him the most?? like we were considering going to some place and i was the only one who actually Asked tay if he wanted to go or if he was ok with us going without him

but anyways. uhh something. Weird. happened. there was a Dude. outside. who was. imitating me.? like... trying to copy how i look. it was really freaky

i told tay to know what i looked like n stuff and to not ever trust that other guy, and then i went down to i guess fight him

and Fight Him I Sure Did. he had some kinda sharp weapon and i had. something. some kinds tools idk what they were

he managed to cut me once and *i* managed to stab him through the mouth into his head. at an angle where every time he moved, he crushed his skull further. the sound was so disgusting, i couldnt look at it and he wouldnt stop

i was screaming for help and some woman came over, said something about hannah, andd. idk i guess that was okay then

i went back in the house and tried to make food but i cant cook so it went bad. tay was sitting on the counter trying to guide me buy man i am Bad

then his dad came home and was like. i told you i put food in the fridge. and i jus OH. I. COMPLETELY FORGOT. SORRY. and he said it was fine blehbleh

i told him about the weird dude (really unsettling and scary the entire time something was Wrong with him) and he got kinda Hh and said something about hannah too, but also that we couldnt talk here. i understood, the walls had eyes, metaphorically.

aaand that was p much it. think thats all i remember. i kinda miss tay and also his brother they were cool. feel like i dreamt more but i forgot u.u

[salaciousslut]

I'll try to not be too distracting since i know how important exams are, but i know you'll ace your exam. You're a smart girl<3 I hope you have fun when you go out after, I wish i could be there to take care of you while you're having a good time. Im glad you feel honored, you've just been on my mind a lot🫣 pretty music makes people think of pretty people<3 Kali is one of my favorite artists, if a scandal about her ever broke out it'll break me inside bc as a latina, Im a big supporter of other latinas🤭

Im basically the same way, I used to be extra prepared charger cords and all, but nowadays all my friends and i need is like IDs, a wax pen or two, and our phones 🤭 but im def making sure my friends are safe bc i have the most wits about me when we're drunk. Yeah i was thinking about you 🫣 i had to reel in my thoughts before i got too turned on though so at least it wasnt too worrisome. You'd fit right in with us sweetheart<3 it would've been so nice to have you on my lap drinking with us and talking to us🥺

Such a sweet girl, speaking when told to<3 makes me feel better that you get it, and you wont think that i dont care! Ive had a few people think that before.

Youre so cute sweetheart<33 and with you saying it so confidently it makes my heart ache a little that i really cant just show up to your apartment and use your pretty little pussy</3 you deserve to be used after using your brain to study all day 🥺

I like seeing others happy too, if you were just a pretty girl i was walking by i'd give you a complement on how you wore your hair and one on your outfit just to see you smile, wouldn't ask for a number or nothing, just an innocent complement and hope it made your day better. I dont like one sided shit so it makes me happy to see you say that first 🥰 you really know how to make a butch feel special you know that? Youre too good at flattering leos, sweetheart. I think you holding my face in your hands would fix me actually<3

Wait thats too cute 🥺 if i got to be comfy enough i would definitely be more than willing to let you learn my schedule! I would love to ft with you whenever you wanted omg🤭 you are too sweet<333 i bet so many people would be jealous of the fact that such a pretty princess isnt calling them up out of the blue<3

I promise im not too hard on myself, last time i needed to check myself was well over a year ago. I know i deserve good things. And not to be on some hippie shit but if i didnt think i did, i wouldnt be willing to accept all the ways the universe has helped me. Im growing but i still still slip up like everyone else you know?

youre not distracting at all!! you are a welcome break hehe!! my brain hurts but i love talking to you! and youve been on my mind a lot too!!

yes i always have some meds and chapstick and chargers and eye drops and stuff haha. but when im drunk i get a lil carried away so take care of me okay? hehe

yes im such a good girl hehe!! i just wanna be relaxed and spend time with someone!!

stop i love when people compliment me!!! it makes me sooooo happy and i feel more confident that day. plus coming from a kindhearted soul like you? it would make my day

yay!! i love calling people! especially video calling bc i just feel like its more personal! plus i love seeing people hehe, makes my heart full!! and i should be the one who people should be jealous of! look at you!!

yes i completely understand! im glad you are at that mindset! i feel like thats a very mature way to look at things

[chaoxfix]

do gems conduct electricity?

word count: 13K relationship: sonic & rouge ao3 link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/39375603

summary:

Rouge is a thief, spy, and works for anyone who can pay the right price. She may have a conscience, but she’ll admit to being generally untrustworthy. Especially since she has a talent for seeing through people. Which is why she’s surprised that she might be one of the few people Sonic is honest with.

alt: Two conversations Rouge would never have expected from Sonic, and a lie she tells on his behalf.

notes:

one of many sonic forces rewrites focusing on the idea of sonic being used as the Eggman Empire’s battery during forces. im not saying its a theory per say, as that'd require evidence, and i dont have anything except motive and the fact that sonic's in pretty good condition when he busts himself out, and how quickly eggman takes over the world. 

still, if this WAS something canon and expanded upon... it would have packed a punch. knowing sonic's energy is what's being used to fight his friends... i'd count that as torture, wouldn't you?

also notes for re: rouge: as far as i can tell in-game, she’s the one who actually confirms sonic is being…. ‘tortured’ … and they havent had many scenes together though have had a few intense ones (like sonic giving her shadows ring). i couldnt get the idea of them having an oddly personal ‘rooftop conversation’ friendship but never talk outside of serious confessions.

also minor cw: they discuss shadows death and whether it was intentional (ie suicide related) or not. its not written to be super triggery but it is very melancholic.

this whole fic series is more melodramatic than i intended it to be but w/e

fic:

Rouge and Sonic don’t run in the same circles, but she knows far too much about him all the same. 

They aren’t friends , not exactly. Rouge prefers Sonic’s friends to the blue hedgehog himself – specifically, the ones that are fun to piss off because they're not afraid to hit back. Knuckles is fun to tease, and Shadow is… well. He’s complicated enough that she likes the challenge. They’re both isolated loners who are bad at conversation, and are a little too naive despite how much they trust their own (usually bad) judgment. 

Maybe Rouge has a type, but it does make them perfect targets when she’s scheming. 

Sonic, though. He’s not so easy to manipulate. Completely disinterested in Rouge’s usual games. In theory, he should be easy to at least rile up, given that he picks a fight with Eggman on a weekly basis. But unlike his red friends, pissing Sonic off only works if she’s willing to hurt people. And, well, Rouge doesn’t like getting her hands dirty. Her white gloves aren’t just a fashion statement. 

Sonic’s not naive, either, like many of his friends. Or overly trusting. 

Overly forgiving, yes, and sometimes in ways Rouge is sure will end badly – but not trusting . 

Truthfully, Rouge gets the feeling that the only person he completely trusts is himself… and even then, he mainly trusts himself to save the day. If he offers forgiveness to someone who betrays him, well, he can just fight harder next time they try their hand at global domination. Piece of cake. The people he forgives can either accept their second chance or not, but he’s going to offer it no matter what. He chooses to get burned, time and again, because of the tiny chance of someone turning it around. 

It’s a terribly dangerous thought process. She’s genuinely surprised he’s made it this far.

And yet, Sonic’s not stupid. He’s only learned to offer it so many times because it’s worked before. Not only that, but he’s right more often than not. 

Rouge doesn’t care about most of the characters he chooses to forgive. Whether they burn Sonic or not, it’s not Rouge’s business. But she does care that he trusted Shadow, towards the end. That he offered him a chance at forgiveness. 

It matters. It ended badly, yes – Shadow died. But it matters. 

Rouge, though, isn’t particularly trusting or forgiving, no matter how often she has seen that kindness paid forward. She’s worked with too many megalomaniacs, and she’s got too much invested for her own gains. Every side is willing to recruit her, because Rouge has worked for all kinds of ends and means – and she’s not interested in losing that edge just to play nice. 

She’s especially distrustful of anyone whose motive she can’t figure out. 

Everyone has a price, and everyone has an agenda. Most people fall within the grey. She can work with that; Rouge is good at figuring out what people really want and playing just fast and loose enough with her assignment so that it benefits her, too. 

She’s an ends justify the means kind of gal herself –  but she has to know everyone else’s ends and means if she’s going to stick with them. And in her line of work, she’s seen every motive under the sun. Revenge, money, thrill-seeking, family. Surprisingly, she trusts Omega – his plans are quite straightforward. Even Shadow… he was a complex mystery, but he was all about his motives. Once she figured out what it was he wanted, all of his choices lined up perfectly.

But she doesn’t understand Sonic.

No motive quite fits. And Rouge has to admit that even if they’re not friends, he’s a point of fascination. 

She’s not the only one interested, either. GUN wants to know more about him; half the time they hire her, they ask Rouge to lay out every detail she knows about the guy. Bummer for them – she rarely has anything to say that they haven’t already figured out. Instead, Rouge has spent far too much time in meetings with GUN talking about Sonic’s threat level; comparing notes about hidden motives and old gods and ancient power. If Sonic is really someone they can trust to protect them, or if he’s just biding his time to take over the world for himself. 

(It’s really funny the first time she hears it. It’s less funny after he’s fought two gods.) 

For what it’s worth, she laughs at every agent who think he’s a threat. She doesn’t know Sonic’s motive, but she does know his ends and means. “He’s only a threat,” she tells them every time, “if you decide to hurt people. Now tell me, is GUN planning on hurting anyone?” They usually stop asking her questions after that. 

In the end, GUN usually chooses not to capture Sonic. He’s been dependable in a dozen crises so far. And that’s just saving the world. As for Eggman-related schemes, he’s stopped him more times than Rouge can count. And likely, more times than the rest of them even know about. 

They have Sonic to thank for the world still being intact and relatively free. 

(And Sonic has Rouge to thank, just a little, for getting GUN off his back. Her gift to him, and to herself, to keep the world free so she can do as she pleases. )

But even if GUN leaves him alone, they never quite figure him out. 

Rouge can’t either. 

Which means that though she can trust him to save the world, she can’t trust him. Not as a friend. Not until she figures out his real motive and drive. It seems that the feeling is mutual, because Sonic doesn’t make much of an effort to get to know her. Which she’s fine with. He’s a bit too… virtuous and good-humored for her taste. 

It’s alright though. They’re cordial, and sometimes she even thinks his bad jokes are a little funny – and he’s the only one who seems able to take her flirting and give it right back to her. They have mutual friends, and they see each other plenty, and she trusts him to get her out of sticky situations if he happens to be in the area, and sometimes she even returns the favor. 

So Rouge and Sonic don’t run in the same circles – and she’s alright with that.  

But that doesn’t mean she doesn’t know too much about him, all the same. 

They’ve only talked – really talked – a few times. But there are things she’d give anything to learn more about – and some that she’d do a lot more to forget. 

///

Their first real conversation happens after Shadow dies.

It doesn’t happen immediately. They don’t know each other well enough then. Sonic only knows her well enough to give her one of Shadow’s rings as a farewell, as Shadow’s only real friend, so to speak. It’s an unexpected kindness after an unexpected loss. 

The conversation that day blurs in her mind. All she really takes away from it is that Shadow is a hero, and that Sonic isn’t telling the whole story. 

Rouge wants to hear it, someday. Even if she has to force it out of him. 

But that would mean talking to Sonic – and she can’t. Not so soon. They look too alike, and he’s far too wrapped up in the greater mystery for Rouge to stand being near him. 

So they don’t see each other. Not for a while. 

She sees Sonic a lot in the news though, months after Shadow dies. Eggman isn’t trying too actively to take over the world, but he is still causing trouble and seeking chaos emeralds. Eggman was only willing to give them a few weeks of mourning before deciding supervillainy was still his calling. He’s back to his usual schemes – which means Sonic is also back to stopping him. Which means the world is watching their usual dance, stopping traffic as best they can to mitigate the giant robots and explosions. 

In other words, life moves on – it has to. 

Rouge does not move on. Not immediately. 

She’s taking a break from GUN. They haven’t answered enough of her questions and haven’t increased her salary enough to compensate for losing her last colleague.

Instead, she goes back to her roots. She chases anything that shines, and it leads her to a rare impulsive race for the chaos emeralds. 

In hindsight, even if GUN or another spy agency had wanted her, Rouge wouldn’t have been the best fit for the job. It’s not that she was full of volatile emotions, necessarily. But even a little bit of impulse is bad for the job, and puts the plan, her, and any teammates in danger. Rouge is willing to risk a lot for a gem – but she’s not willing to risk another partner. 

But it’s fun. A way to feel like herself when the world still feels a little askew. 

(She’s sure that blowing up the moon tilted the orbit, but she won’t be able to break into GUN’s astronomy reports until she rejoins them.)

At the heart of things, Rouge isn’t a total mess after losing her friend. But she’s still processing. Still figuring out whether to miss him or not. 

Sonic, meanwhile, seems fine. He’s always smiling and playing hero in the news. She wonders what it’s like to be able to bounce back so easily.

But inevitably, chasing chaos emeralds brings Sonic and Rouge back into the same orbit. 

They meet, by chance, at the edge of Casino Night Zone. 

Rouge just stole what she hoped was a chaos emerald. It wasn’t – just another fake, unfortunately. It shouldn’t matter then, that Sonic stopped her steal. But he’d thought it was real, too, and he’d fought her for it, before it all got turned upside down. 

It ended up being an Eggman scheme, so no one really won. That should have been the end of it. Sonic should have run home to his little fox friend in Mystic Ruins, or perhaps gone up to Angel Island to bother Knuckles. 

And yet, Sonic didn’t leave after the fight. Instead, he just tossed the fake chaos emerald up and down in his hand, stalling for time. 

“You doing anything for the next hour?” Sonic asks. 

Rouge gives him a long look. “If you’re looking for a race, I’m not sure I’m your girl.” 

Sonic laughs. He tosses her the gem and winks. “I’ll look past it, just this once. No, but really… I just figured… you like shiny things, right?” 

Rouge raises a brow. “Are you giving me this?” 

“Well, yeah, I’m not a fan of fake chaos emeralds. Definitely don’t like that someone copied Tails’s technology. They don’t feel right when I use them,” he says, “But what I really want is to show you something. I saw it last time I passed through this zone, and thought of you.” 

Rouge is… surprisingly flattered. 

Suspicious of his motives, of course. But he’s already given her the emerald, fake or not. And she supposes… it’s harmless enough to humor him. 

“Well, I’m not a fan of fake jewelry either,” she says, eyes intentionally bored as she looks at the oversized gem. “...But I’ll admit, it’s pretty. Maybe it would make a decent ring.” 

Sonic grins. “So you’ll come?”

“An hour. No more, no less.” 

///

So Rouge finds herself five minutes later on the very edge of the city. Looking down on Casino Night Zone. 

They sit on the tallest rooftop with the best view of the city lights below. They still shine bright enough to cast a technicolor glow on Sonic’s spines. It must do the same to her, because he’s staring at Rouge like she’s something that dazzles, too. 

“I didn’t expect you to keep it on you,” Sonic says. 

Rouge follows his gaze; looks down. She’d forgotten. She’s still wearing Shadow’s inhibitor ring around her wrist. 

She grits her teeth.  

She should’ve realized he would bring it up; that he was lingering just to get a good look at it. But she’s a little offended; Sonic and Shadow were friends, but Sonic himself recognized that Shadow cared about her. Sonic could have kept it for himself if he wanted it so badly. It’s no one’s fault but his own if he gave it to her. If now he doesn’t have anything left of Shadow for himself. 

“Don’t you have a cat to save from its tree?” Rouge asks, and puts a hand over the inhibitor ring, as if to keep him from stealing it. The irony of a thief guarding her most precious possession isn’t lost on her. “Why are you even still here? Don’t you have to get back to Mystic Ruins?” 

“Why would I do that?”

“...Because you live there?”

Sonic raises both brows. “You think I live somewhere? That’s so weird .” 

Rouge’s eye twitches. 

But Sonic doesn’t reach for the inhibitor ring. He only looks at it, fascinated. If he wanted it, Rouge knows he could have stolen it already, with his speed being what it is. 

Reluctantly, Rouge loosens her protective hold. 

Sonic looks a little more cheerful already. “Anyways,” he says, “If you don’t want to talk about Shadow, that’s okay. But to answer you, I thought what I was doing was obvious.”

Rouge doesn’t say anything, just watching him, waiting for the other shoe to drop. 

“I wanted to check on a friend,” he says. 

And there it is. But Sonic doesn’t laugh, or say anything else ridiculous. Instead, he just leans forward, hands on the railing, and looks up at the stars. At the moon, half broken as it is, but still shining. 

Rouge looks at Sonic. Really looks at him; tries to get any read on him at all. 

“I didn’t think we were friends,” she finally says. She glances down at the ring. Thinks about what it might mean, if she and Sonic are friends, too. If it means anything. 

She’d take Shadow over him in a heartbeat. 

But she can’t – and Sonic hasn’t done anything to deserve that, aside from surviving something the Ultimate Lifeform couldn’t. 

She sighs. Her shoulders slump, and she rubs the inhibitor ring. 

“It’s unfair how short his time on this planet was,” she says. “It’s unfair that he never had a chance to enjoy his life. Or make real friendships.” 

“They were real,” Sonic says. “Realer than anything, to Shadow. It had to have been, or he wouldn’t have helped us.” 

Rouge scoffs. “Of course you’d talk about the power of friendship saving us. Ugh. He would have hated it.” 

Sonic chuckles. He looks at her, something half hearted on his face. Whatever he’s thinking, he won’t share it. Not all of it. But there’s something like a smile, and something like comfort. He offers her a hand. “Nah. I think he would’ve liked it. He was a softie, deep down. He cared about people, a lot . Being grumpy or keeping your feelings to yourself doesn’t mean you don’t care.” 

Rouge looks at him for a long time. There is the faintest thought at the back of her mind. That Sonic isn’t talking about only Shadow. 

He might not even be talking about her. 

Cool air blows in from the west, and Rouge shivers, just a little. Sonic doesn’t look phased, instead just sighing into the chill and closing his eyes. They fall into a companionable silence for a little while; Rouge watches the cars pass in the streets far below them. 

She’s surprised Sonic is sitting still for this long. 

It’s hard to imagine him being here willingly. She’s not sure what to do with it, now that he’s here. 

It’s funny – he kind of reminds her of Shadow, when he’s not talking. 

“I’m not working for GUN right now, you know,” Rouge says. “They haven’t earned my trust back yet.” 

Sonic makes a soft, noncommittal noise. “Fun as they are to fight, I’m getting tired of dodging them,” he admits. “I hear their new commander’s a step in the right direction though. Maybe they’ll finally turn it around.”

And chaos, there’s that trust again. 

“Do you ever stop letting people abuse your trust?” 

Sonic actually laughs. “I don’t know if you’re really someone who should be asking me that. I could happily take that rock off your hands if you’re worried about who I put my faith in.” 

Rouge raises a brow. Some virtuous hero he is. “You wouldn’t dare .” 

“Try me.” 

She knocks her hand again Sonic’s shoulder. It’d be flirting if he was a few years older – but right now, it feels like correcting a kid brother. Sonic snickers, and she knows he’s not reading too far into it.

“What will people say if you took this back from me, hm?” she asks. “I’d never recover.”

“Ah, but if you told people, that’d mean admitting I gave it to you in the first place.” Sonic winks. “My reputation can take a hit – but what will your master thief friends say when they hear you accepted a jewel this big as a gift ?” 

Rouge smirks. “That assumes there are other thieves at my level – and that we’d ever hang out together.” 

“My bad, my bad.” Sonic chuckles, rubs the back of his neck. “I guess I was picturing it like a secret book club or something. Gossipping about all the newest jewels between… um, whatever people do at book clubs.” 

And yeah – Rouge was right. He really is just a kid. She laughs despite herself. “Whether or not I’d join this book club depends entirely on what you think we’d read.” 

“The classics,” Sonic says without missing a beat. “Anything old and fancy. Romance novels from a few centuries back, probably.” 

Rouge presses a hand to her chest, faking a gasp. “You’re stereotyping me. Just because I like jewels doesn’t mean I like everything else to be formal. …I prefer nonfiction, anyway. That would be like me stereotyping you as a…” She hums. “Comic book fan.”

“But I do like them.” 

“I should be so surprised.” 

Sonic looks at the ground, smiling with a dumb smile on his face. He goes quiet for a moment, and they fall into a companionable silence. The city lights shine below them, and Rouge has to admit, they really are beautiful. She’s glad he thought of her. Normally she doesn’t fly this far off the ground… She would never have been able to see this otherwise. 

Clouds pass over the moon, and Rouge can almost imagine it’s still whole. But the clouds pass, and she sees the crumbled remains. 

She glances back, and Sonic’s looking up at the moon, too – an unreadable expression on his face. Funny. She always thought he was so expressive. 

“You said you wanted to check in on me,” she finally says, turning her upper half to face him. “Consider me checked in on. I’m doing alright.” Sonic opens his mouth to say something – but Rouge cuts him off. “And now that I’m fine – I’m far more interested in how you’re doing.”

“What, about Shadow?” 

“Anything,” she says, though admittedly, yes, she was really only interested in what he felt about Shadow. “Have you ever lost someone before, on all those adventures you’ve been on?” 

Sonic looks surprisingly taken aback. “Oh.” He pauses, clearly thinking hard, and clearly trying to dodger he question entirely. “Uh… it’s hard to say…” 

“Have you, or not?” 

It takes a long while. Then, finally, hesitantly: “I always got them back… eventually. Sort of,” Sonic says. “A few missing friends, who turned up again a year or two ago. A uh… friend that I put faith in, where things didn’t turn out so good for him. He was rebuilt… well. I guess he might not be the same person anymore. So maybe I have really lost him, too …And now Shadow.” 

There are a few stories there, Rouge thinks. ‘Rebuilt’ must mean a robot. She decides not to ask. 

“I wish Shadow could have been around for longer,” Sonic finally continues. “I think he would have wanted to, too. Even if he chose to sacrifice himself like that… and even if it seems like he didn’t have a future planned for himself, it would have been nice for him to stay and figure one out.” 

Rouge nods. Privately, she doesn’t share that she finds it hard to picture any future for Shadow. He was so in his head, so cocky and rude and bent on revenge for so much of his brief time here. Only turning it around towards the end. But, like Sonic… she does wish he’d had the chance to make himself into someone entirely new. “I replay that day a lot. We really thought he was going to let the planet die… but now, it’s hard to picture him making any other choice.” 

“Yeah. He’s good at sticking to a decision and seeing it through, alright. He did just about everything he ever set his mind on… except his original plan,” Sonic says, looking up at the moon. “I’m just glad he turned it around and saw this one through. Saving Earth, I mean. Not dying.” As if he really needed to clarify, he looks down and adds, “I don’t think he wanted to die, necessarily. I hope not.” 

“I would hope not, too,” Rouge says, looking at Sonic more intensely. “Why ‘necessarily’? Do you think he wanted it to happen like this?”

“I…” Sonic frowns. He furrows his brows. “I don’t know. Probably not. You knew him better than I did though. He was so stoic and kept everything so close to his chest… It can really do a number on you,” he says thoughtfully. “If anyone would know, it should be you. So if even you aren’t sure, well, I guess we’ll never know.”

She narrows her eyes, ever so slightly. 

She’s caught on that middle sentence. Between this, and what he’d said earlier, Rouge is getting the sense that Sonic is trying to allude to something deeper. 

She’s a little fascinated despite herself, thinking of some of those classified GUN files on him. Is he a threat? Is there more to him than thrill-seeking? 

“You say that like you’re the type to keep things to yourself,” she asks, looking at him with as disinterested a stare as she can manage. “Are you?”

To her surprise, Sonic laughs despite the slight insult. He even throws her a wink. “You got me, I’m an open book. But that’s not what we’re talking about, I’m just saying-” 

Rouge cuts him off. “Darling, no one who’s an open book has to say they’re an open book.” 

“I’m just saying ,” Sonic pointedly finishes, “That if I did know what that was like, which I don’t, it would be a nightmare. His life was… really rough. But he chose to do the right thing in the end. So I get the feeling he was a real softie, deep down. He cared about you, and Mobius, and all the people who live on it. He chose to trust us, and to listen to his heart. I don’t think he did that lightly, or that it was easy for him – but he still did it. Either way, it ended the same, and we can thank him for helping save the world. …Even if he kept things to himself and acted like a real jerk most of the time.” 

“But,” Rouge lightly interrupts. “Do you think he meant for things to end the way they did?”

Sonic pauses, thinking for a very long moment. She almost thinks he’ll choose not to answer at all. But to her surprise, he does. “He had his walls up for a reason, and the way he was brought into the world… I mean, it’d mess anyone up. Maybe he did mean to just… stop, after he finished whatever he set out to do. Especially since his revenge was such a limited plan. I mean – if he went with his original plan and destroyed the planet, what would be left for him to do afterwards? Nothing. Even if he survived it, he’d just be alone.” He looks uncomfortable thinking about that, and Rouge almost regrets asking. It feels… wrong, to have someone as bright and positive as Sonic talk about Shadow’s end. But ever the optimist, Sonic looks bad with a tiny smile. A glimmer of positivity. He continues, “But, he had a big change of heart last minute – I like to think that he could have figured out a life for himself. I choose to believe that he’s only not around because he didn’t have another option.”

It’s a surprisingly thoughtful speech.

…Rouge gets the feeling he’s been wanting to say it for a bit now. 

“It’s a nice thought,” she finally says. Sonic smiles. “I hope you’re right.” 

They both go quiet for a moment. She wonders, suddenly, if he’s had anyone to talk about this with – or if he’s kept it to himself, like her. She thinks back to the ARK, and the group of friends around him. Maybe he could have talked with Knuckles – but Knuckles didn’t know Shadow. And Tails… poor kid. She gets the feeling he was a little too young to grasp the scope of what they were facing. 

Despite herself, she hopes this is cathartic for Sonic as it feels for her. 

And – in all fairness… He’s younger than her. He doesn’t seem to have anyone else to talk about this with. She might not consider Sonic a friend, but she does have, maybe, the tiniest soft spot for him. He’s young. Despite herself, she wants to give him a chance to open up. 

"I just can’t believe he’s gone. Just like that,” Rouge looks closer at Sonic, at the contemplative expression still on his face. He called himself an open book, hm? She’ll be the judge of that. “Do you miss him? Or did you know him well enough to miss him?” 

Sonic meets her eyes, his own surprisingly guarded. “Kind of a loaded question there. Like I said, you knew him better than I did.”

“But, do you miss him?”

Sonic looks down. He crosses his arms over his chest. Clearly thinking about it. Rouge waits for another impassioned speech about how Shadow gave it all for everyone else to live, so of course he misses him. But then just when Rouge thinks he’s going to say something passionate, he looks away and rubs the back of his quills.

“I don’t know. Maybe I could have if we’d had more time. That’s the whole problem, isn’t it? He died before we could really get to know him."

Rouge sighs. “I suppose…” 

“I definitely feel like we lost something now that he’s not around. So I guess that could mean I miss him, even if I didn’t know him very well.” Rouge lets out a soft hum to show she agrees. “...But he kind of did it on purpose. He didn’t want anyone to know him. He had a lot of walls up, and he didn’t want to let anyone past them. Knowing what I know now… I kind of get it. Thinking that your only purpose is bringing destruction to everyone around you. If I was in his shoes, I…” He kicks his feet a little, heels tapping against the building below. “Truth be told, he reminds me a little of Chaos… I just wish I’d been able to give Shadow that same peace.” 

She wonders what he was going to say, before he changed course. But she decides not to ask. She gets the feeling this is rare, for him. So she’ll take what she can get.

“Maybe you did,” she says, instead of asking. “You were using the chaos emeralds with him too, after all.” 

Sonic doesn’t meet her eyes when she looks at him this time. He crosses his arms tighter around his middle, looking surprisingly sad. “Yeah… maybe.” 

The rooftop gets quiet after that, with only the wind to break the tension. Rouge thinks she may have overstepped, somehow. Miscalculated not pressing him for more details. She’s not sure. 

But she has the overwhelming urge to not leave things here. And to not leave him sad and contemplative. “If we’re talking chaos emeralds and how they make everyone feel,” she finally says, voice lilting, flirty. “I bet Knuckles could shed some light on things. Maybe we should pay his island a visit?” 

Sonic grins. He sees the out for what it is and takes it in a heartbeat. “Should have known all this was to butter me up to get the Master Emerald out of me.” 

Rouge bats her eyes. “Would I do that?” 

Sonic just shakes his head, looking exasperated. “Doesn’t matter. You think I know the current coordinates? Knuckles won’t let me within a thousand miles of his island anymore, after all the trouble I’ve caused him the last few years.”

Rouge grins, canines sharp in the technicolor light. “I’m sure he’s not that vindictive… Not for a friend.” 

“No one holds a grudge quite like Knuckles.”

“Well,” Rouge says, voice soft and as persuasive as she can make it sound – intentionally over the top. She playfully pokes at his chest. “If you do happen to find the coordinates, I promise I won’t share them with anyone.”

“Oh, Knuckles would be thrilled,” he teases, easily swatting away her hand. “I’m sure he’ll be much more receptive if he knows it’s just you stealing the Master Emerald.” 

Rouge winks. “He would. It gets boring up on that island. He could use some excitement.” 

“You keep telling yourself that.”

A breeze slowly blows in from the south, and Rouge shivers. She’s satisfied. Sonic looks better, and… they’ve finally talked about Shadow. She can’t imagine they have much else to say to one another. Despite what Sonic says, she knows they’re still not ‘friends’, per say. And she prefers not to overplay her hand. 

So Rouge fakes a yawn, stretching out and shaking out her wings. “Well, not that this hasn’t been fun,” she says, “But if you don’t have Angel Island’s current coordinates, I’m afraid I’ve got to run. Some of us have beauty sleep to catch up on, and this night air is going to ruin my skin.” 

“Sounds boring – night air’s the best air. But I guess if you have beauty sleep to catch up on…” Sonic winks, and just like that, he’s standing on the rooftop ledge. If he were anyone else, Rouge might reach for him on impulse. But he’s so very himself that Rouge doesn’t think for one second that he’s in danger. He gives her a two-fingered salute. “Night, Rouge.”

She laughs, and he jumps. 

Soon, there’s nothing but a blue afterimage against a dark sky and city lights. If she strains her eyes and looks in the right direction, she can just barely make out a blue blur speeding across the countryside towards Mystic Ruins. 

Going home to see his friends after all, hm? 

He’s more sentimental than he lets on, she thinks. 

But she heads to her own apartment, and feels a little bit better in the weeks that follow. 

One conversion doesn’t make her forget about Shadow. She doesn’t feel completely fine; she still lost a friend too soon. She doesn’t stop wearing the inhibitor ring, either. 

But it feels better. Lighter. It was nice to talk about Shadow with one of the few other people alive who might have known him at all.  

//

Shadow comes back within a month of that conversation. 

She could forget that conversation with Sonic, if she wanted to. But even if she tried… it will always strike Rouge as an unexpected, if ultimately unnecessary, kindness. And every now and then, when she’s in Casino Night Zone, she stops by the rooftop for a few minutes to think.

// 

Within two years, that rooftop takes on a very different meaning. For six months, she looks up at the moon – now repaired, only to be overshadowed by the everpresent Death Egg in the sky.

The Eggman Empire is expanding every day. Soon, there will be nothing left.

Eggman shouldn’t be able to conquer the world this fast. It shouldn’t be possible, even with all the resources he’s been amassing the more he conquers. 

But without Sonic to stop him, there’s not much hope. 

She thinks about the last time she lost a friend. And the unexpected kindness that followed. She’s not the type to do favors, really. But when Knuckles contacts her out of the blue, not just with a mission to aid the resistance, but with information that Sonic’s alive…

Well, she may have an unexpected kindness to return. 

//

The worst part of being a spy is what you find out about your friends. Especially when they aren’t even aware of what you know. 

Rouge is here on the Death Egg to confirm that Sonic is alive – and she does. Chaos help her, she can confirm he’s here. He’s alive, and even in decent health. 

But the truth is worse. And every question she’s had about Sonic is on display in front of her. 

She’s in the rafters above a small room. Not a holding cell, though. 

A generator. 

//

“Agent Rouge,” she remembers. Commander Tower had tried to seem so imposing. By size, he certainly was – she was barely as tall as his hip. But they both knew who held the power in these conversations. “Do you have any new reports on Sonic?” 

Rouge bats her eyes, sitting on the edge of the war room table. “That depends. Do you have anything to pay me for all my trouble, following him?” 

Commander Tower sighs. Two guards drop two sacks of glittering gems for her. Rouge clasps her hands over her heart, absolutely overjoyed at the way they sparkle. 

“My, you even remembered not to put any fakes inside this time,” she says, smiling wickedly. “It’s no chaos emerald, but I suppose those are in limited demand…” 

“Rouge, do you have information or not?” 

“Only that he’s even more powerful than you think,” she says, examining her gloves at the nails, splaying her hand this way and that. “But I think you already knew that. He fought Chaos, after all. Anyone who can go toe-to-toe with a god and win… I’m not surprised you’re interested.” 

Commander Tower narrows his eyes. “Do you know his location?” 

“He doesn’t seem to live anywhere,” she says. “Free spirited like that.” 

“Have you interacted with him one on one?”

“Can’t say that I have,” Rouge lies. “He’s hard to get alone.”

“Is there anywhere he frequently returns?” 

“Nothing that would benefit you to know.” 

“Agent Rouge-” 

“Ah ah ah… I wouldn’t recommend pissing him off by tracking his friends’ location. Which, might I remind you, you already know,” she asks. “I might remind you too, he is very powerful. I’m not sure I’d like to see that power used when he’s angry.”

“That’s the point of your mission! To identify his power, and identify a way to contain him-” 

“Contain him?” Rouge presses a finger to her bottom lip, feigning innocence. “Now why would we want to do that?”

“He’s a loose cannon!” Tower explodes. “We have no idea what he wants or what he’ll do to get it! You of all people should know he can’t be trusted without a motive. If he gets all seven chaos emeralds again–”

“Then maybe you ought to find one and pay me with it to keep it out of his hands.” Rouge interrupts him without a second thought. She winks at him. “Just a thought.” 

“Agent Rouge, this is serious-”

“I’m always serious about the chaos emeralds.” She takes out a large pink gem from one of the sacks, examining it carefully. With a tone designed to piss Tower off slightly less, she continues, “But Sonic’s not a threat. He’s certainly powerful. But I don’t know if containing him would be the right move.” 

“That isn’t what we hired you for,” Tower snaps. “We don’t pay you for your conscience. Your whole job was to identify how to contain him if we ever need to.”

“And I’ve realized that he simply can’t be contained,” she says simply. “Mission complete. Not only is it impossible, but containing him would ruin him, if there are other threats… I’m not sure he’d like being kept in a cage, and I’m not sure you’d like what happens if he finally gets out. He might not save the world if he’s upset with us, and I happen to like living here, don’t you? Again, not that it would be possible to contain him anyway. But it would be a bit silly to aggravate your best shot at living til retirement.” 

“Don’t underestimate our capabilities.” 

Rouge bats her eyes. “I only do it because I’ve overestimated them before,” she says simply. “Unless you found a way to take Sonic’s natural power from him, you’d have a very difficult time keeping him in place. And I doubt you’d want to take away your best weapon against ancient gods, should they make their return.” 

She picks up the sacks of gems and places them in the large satchel at her side. 

“Now,” she says, hand on her hip. “Are we finished?”

Tower pinches the bridge of his nose. “Get out of my sight, Agent Rouge.” 

//

GUN should never have worried that Sonic would turn against them. 

They should have been more worried about what would happen if Eggman ever managed to contain Sonic, the way GUN had tried to for themselves. 

The writing was on the wall. Rouge feels stupid, like the worst spy on the planet, for not putting it together earlier. 

Eggman has been learning to harness energy sources for years. Even when he first started, he was utilizing small animals to power his machines to conquer the world and displace Mobians, zone by zone. They had always been small forest animals, and most people were far more worried about the threat it posed to the people who lived in these zones. 

When Eggman escalated over the years, society at large forgot where he had started out. And how he had started. 

Waking gods and trying to harness them for their power – of course that would take precedent. 

When he utilized the Wisps for his theme park, harnessing thousands – millions – for their energy, despite the cost to their lifeforce… Rouge, GUN – the whole world should have realized then what his real plan was. 

Laid out, it all sounds so simple. 

Eggman had started with small creatures. Learning to harness their natural energy. He was bested by a very powerful little blue hedgehog. Then, he started experimenting with capturing gods’ powers, chaos energy, now that he knew how much power he needed to not only take over the world but best that strange little blue hedgehog. His next attempt seemed small in comparison – waking a powerful experiment, another little hedgehog, this one called Project Shadow. Compared to using gods, it must have seemed like nothing. Yet when Eggman tried to use Shadow for his bidding, it blew up in his face. Shadow turned traitor, and nearly destroyed the world that Eggman was trying so hard to conquer. He bit off more than he could chew. So he dialed back, created failsafes. Focused on waking Gaia, in hopes of using that god’s energy to take over the world – and to do that, learned a way to safely strip Sonic of his super form, and harness both the chaos emeralds’ power, and Sonic’s own natural energy, to work for his schemes. And when Sonic managed to recover even from that… it’s no wonder that Eggman sought power elsewhere, from the wisps. A back-to-the-start scheme, a return to Eggman’s basics – to perfect his energy harvesting methods on new lifeforms. 

It’s only in hindsight that Rouge can see the pattern for what it is. It was all leading to this. 

Capturing Sonic and utilizing his natural chaos energy. 

The chaos emeralds are nowhere to be found on Mobius. Now that Rouge is here, she can only guess what they’ve been used for. 

But Rouge needs to witness this. Needs to know exactly what they’re up against. She tries to tell herself that she isn’t watching a friend suffer, because they’re not close. But she can’t help the way her stomach drops as she watches the grimmest scene she can imagine for Sonic. 

It would be better if it was torture. 

She thinks it might be a form of torture – but that’s not what Eggman is doing. Not his primary aim. For as flamboyant as Eggman has always been, he’s always had pragmatism, only ruined a little with his mean streak. 

He’s vile, but he knows a resource when he sees one. 

Why would he waste the best energy source in the universe when he’s finally got his hands on him? 

Rouge grits her teeth and takes notes of the important details. Everything she sees. 

There are large screens that do a lot of the work for her. Energy input – the chaos emeralds. Energy output – Sonic’s natural energy, keeping the emeralds from being fully drained. A check and balance to keep him from going super, and to ensure the emeralds never dampen or reject Eggman’s machinery. 

There are wires and harnesses, and something injected under Sonic’s skin. And he’s traveling at his usual supersonic speed on some kind of treadmill. Leave it to Eggman to take something Sonic loves more than anything and turn it into – this . 

As for Sonic himself… 

He looks exhausted. Smaller than she remembers; too thin, with duller fur and blunter quills. 

He doesn’t look like a larger than life hero. 

He looks his age. Barely sixteen; celebrating it as a hostage to his enemy. 

Rouge feels sick to her stomach. She’d love to intervene, but there’s nothing she can do from here. If even Sonic is captured like this, there is absolutely nothing Rouge, whose best assets are spying and stealing and collecting data, could do to bust him out right here and now. 

She’s still tempted to try, though – and she’s debating it, very seriously. If she could just cut the power line to the failsafes… the things that prevent Sonic from going Super, maybe, just maybe-

She misses her opportunity when she sees Eggman fly in on his Eggmobile.

His voice is harsh and jarring as always – but this time, he sounds like he’s gloating. “Having fun, rodent?” 

Sonic’s jaw flexes. “Oodles.” 

“You look terrible ,” Eggman says, flying closer. “Lucky for you, the doctor is in.”

He reaches for Sonic’s face – and to Rouge’s surprise, he actually bites at Eggman’s fingers. 

Eggman pulls back and shakes off his hand. “Wretched animal,” he grumbles, shaking his hand. “You act like I don’t feed you.” 

Sonic glowers. He barely even looks at him. Though he’s still traveling at super-speed on that treadmill, he looks exhausted. 

Eggman seems to think so, too. 

“Humph. Last time you made it three days before burning out,” Eggman says, flying his Eggmobile around the room. Observing Sonic from every angle. Cackling, chuckling to himself. Gloating. Something Rouge thinks, privately, that Eggman should have long since gotten tired of after having Sonic for months. 

But she supposes that after over five years of being a thorn in Eggman’s side, perhaps he feels entitled to gloat for a few months. To appreciate the novelty for a little longer. 

Sonic looks dead on his feet, but he hasn’t slowed down. 

Rouge uses binoculars to get a better look. He’s even worse from here. She can see his ribs. He’s clearly dehydrated, if his nose is that dry. And his eyes are puffy and bloodshot. There are no visible injuries, and he doesn’t look sick – but he does look awful. Like the very life is being drained out of him. 

Eggman seems to think so, too. Yet he sounds irritated, not satisfied, as he circles Sonic again. “I suppose you haven’t been eating again, hmm? Do you think that’ll make this end faster?” 

“What can I say? Your food is gross , Egghead.” 

There’s sass in Sonic’s tone, and Rouge feels the tiniest glimmer of hope, that he hasn’t been completely defeated. But even his sass sounds tired. Whatever edge his voice would normally have has been ground down until there’s almost nothing left. 

Eggman tsks. “Never thought I’d see the day when Sonic tried to run less ,” he says, yet even with his disapproval, there’s still that gloating edge. He’s enjoying this. “You know I’ll have your friends’ heads by this evening if you’re sabotaging yourself on purpose. If it affects your speed at all, they’re the ones to pay for it.” 

Sonic sets his eyes straight forward. Running with determination. “I’ve run on empty before. I just don’t like your stupid food. Nothing more to it than that.” 

Eggman glowers. Rouge glances at the screen – and despite going hungry, Sonic’s speed has been steady. If it’s a ploy for Sonic to sabotage himself, it must be to ‘burn out’ – whatever Eggman meant by that. Despite not having any reason to make Sonic suffer though, Eggman has never been one to let sass go unpunished. Especially not when he has everything he could ever want right at his fingertips. He presses a button on the eggmobile, and Sonic yelps. Rouge sees sparks fly from the harness. 

Sonic turns his head towards him, a spark of real anger in his eyes. But there’s the faintest edge of optimism. “I don’t know if you should really be damaging your best toy. Can’t wear me out too soon. You never know when my heart might give out.” 

“Don’t give me that, you worthless warthog!” Eggman is shouting now – the thin line between gloating victor and mad scientist blurring together. But he doesn’t press the button again, instead just flexing his fist. “You just remember our agreement. Keep it moving, else I’ll target your friends’ base. I’ve saved them for last – but don’t you get excited and think I’ll let them go longer than I have to. There’s nothing else left to conquer. If you were hoping for a rescue, if you were hoping to save your friends, you’re running out of time.” 

Rouge watches as Sonic grits his teeth. 

Eggman chuckles, then flies closer. It’s harder to hear – but his voice is lower. Darker. “Want me to show you how I used your energy today, hedgehog?” he asks. 

Sonic swallows hard. But he doesn’t say a word. 

“If you last another two hours, I’ll show you. You’ll get to see all your friends in action, too – how exciting, seeing them alive one last time.”

“They’ll win,” Sonic says, teeth still gritted. “We’ve won every other time-” 

“And every other time, they had you.” Eggman grins wider, rubbing his mustache. “And now, I have all of your power to myself. I have to admit, even I didn’t think I could conquer the world this fast. But you’re full of surprises, Sonic.” He reaches to pat Sonic’s back, hard, with those huge hands. “From the bottom of my darkest, blackest heart – thank you .”

Sonic actually cusses him out. Rouge raises her brows. She doesn’t recognize the language, but she knows that tone. She doesn’t have to know the words to know that Sonic’s just insulted every facet of Eggman’s being. 

“Ohoho, I was wondering how long it would take to make you regress. You were so much more fun to destroy as a child.” 

Eggman cackles, and Sonic doesn’t say another word. 

Something beeps on Eggman’s eggmobile, and he sighs deeply. “As delightful as our chats are, I’m afraid I’m needed elsewhere. Delegates to capture, people to enslave, you know the drill. Ta ta!” 

Sonic balls his hands into fists. 

But he doesn’t stop running.

Rouge slips further back into the vents, then back to her rendezvous point. Far away from Eggman – far closer to help. 

Her hands aren’t entirely steady when she finally opens her communicator. 

“Knuckles!” she says. “Can you hear me?”

To her relief, Knuckles answers –

“Rouge? It’s about time. How’s Sonic doing?”

Fully expecting Sonic to be alive. Fully trusting the Chaotix’s report. Fully expecting Sonic to be fine, and ready to be sprung out at a moment’s notice. 

She doesn’t give a damn what they expect. Sonic needs help – now .

But.

Rouge does care what would happen if anyone were to let this slip to GUN. She thinks back to her conversation with Commander Tower. Thinks back to what they would do, if they ever considered Sonic a threat again. 

If they knew this technology existed… that they could simply siphon Sonic’s energy, too- 

So Rouge lies. She lies about everything. 

She lies to GUN, she lies to Vector, she lies to Knuckles. 

She tells them nothing about Sonic being the generator.

She makes up a story about Eggman dragging this out just to show off his conquered empire to Sonic. Tells him about generic, unspecified torture. Makes up a story about Eggman ejecting Sonic into space once this is all over. 

It’s stupid. It’s a terrible lie. But Knuckles is the most trusting person she knows, even after all this time. He accepts it without question, and she doesn’t even feel guilty. The truth would just hurt him, anyway. Better to keep it bland. ‘Torture’ is acceptable; torture is surreal. No one will know what to do with it. But they’ll all agree that it’s wrong and that they need to break Sonic out immediately. 

It can also account for him being low on energy for a bit. And whatever mental state he’ll be in, after he leaves. It’ll also mean no one asks too many questions – who wants to ask their friend what way he was tortured? 

No, best to obscure the truth. 

Because, being used as a human battery – knowing that Sonic is the reason that Eggman is so strong now – 

It feels wrong . 

Others might not believe her fib, she knows. But it doesn’t matter, as long as they get Sonic out of there, as fast as possible. 

Logistically, the sooner they get Sonic out of there, the less power Eggman has in his reserves. 

Morally –

The sooner they get Sonic out of there, the easier Rouge can sleep at night. The less she’ll think about losing another friend. 

On her way out, she sabotages the line between Sonic and the chaos emeralds. Just faint enough that it looks like a wire finally shorted. If Eggman investigates (which she’s sure he will), he’ll only be able to find a tiny singed wire. Possibly a spark that blew off from when Eggman shocked Sonic as a petty revenge. 

It’s enough to bring down his system, and he’ll spend the rest of his life thinking he lost, and that he only had himself to blame. 

Maybe Sonic will be able to escape on his own now. Maybe not. Either way, the resistance is coming tomorrow. But she thinks – after months of hell, he could use at least a day to recharge his energy.

Sonic does not need to know she helped him. No one needs to know she helped him. 

–

After the war, Rouge celebrates by going to the rooftop by Casino Night Zone. 

The city lights aren’t there anymore; the city was taken over pretty early on by Eggman. It will be a long time before it recovers; before people will light up skyscrapers and technicolor billboards all over the city. 

She’s there for an hour, just thinking. 

But a breeze blows in from the west – and when she turns, it’s Sonic. 

She stares at him for a long, long moment. What is there to say? 

Sonic seems to be thinking the same thing though, and she feels the tiniest pang of sympathy. He’ll need some decent socialization before his head is all the way on again. “Fancy meeting you here,” she finally says. 

A little bit of tension bleeds out of Sonic’s shoulders. “I was about to say the same thing.”

He hesitates, walks a little closer, until they’re both looking over the same railing. 

There’s still about three feet of space between them. It feels bigger somehow, now that she’s seen him looking so small. 

“Vanilla would have my head if he knew I was talking to you here instead of sending you back,” Rouge teases. “...She is still acting as nurse for the resistance, right?” 

“Wouldn’t know,” Sonic says, sending her a smirk. “Haven’t been.”

Ah, yes. What a thing to brag about, not getting treated for injuries. Chaos, these teen boy heroes. Rouge just shakes her head – but she can’t quite blame him, either. She thinks he’s had enough of being monitored and having his vitals checked. Knowing what Eggman did to him, she’s honored to be the first person to cover for him while he sneaks away. 

Besides… Physically, all he really needs is a few extra chili dogs and some rest. He’s already looking a lot better now that his energy isn’t being drained – he’s still way too thin, and she’s pretty sure he’s lost his balance a few times lately from being over-tired, but all in all, he’s in incredible shape from being held captive for six months. 

And truthfully… the few problems he does have seem to be self-inflicted. She regrets even thinking it, putting two and two together – but she knows Sonic did it on purpose. A way to protect his friends; to burn out faster. And Eggman’s punishments for misbehaving couldn’t be too brutal. After all – why let your battery waste away if you can keep him healthy and fully charged? The worst you can punish him still has to leave him strong.

It makes her uncomfortable, thinking about Sonic in that way. 

It’s hard to picture the boy who saved the world six times over as the one hooked up to Eggman’s machine. And yet, she saw it for herself. 

Emotionally, she has no idea how he’s doing. But she doesn’t imagine it’s anywhere close to fine. There’s definitely  something off about him. She wonders — worries — if it’s really something that can heal over time. 

She shakes off the thought as soon as she can. 

“Well, if you’re going to hide here, I won’t be the one to rat you out. I’ve got better things to do,” Rouge says, breaking a silence that has started to feel heavy. 

Sonic leans against the railing, not even looking at her, but there’s the ghost of a smile on his face. He looks a little bit contemplative, but he doesn’t speak first. Instead, he just looks out at the ruined city under them. 

For all the difference between then and now, it reminds Rouge of the last time they were here.

She wonders what all he came here for. 

Rouge absently touches the inhibitor ring on her wrist. “If you’re here because you want someone to force you to talk, I’m not sure I’m the girl you’re looking for. Amy’s still back at HQ.”

Sonic finally looks her way. “Oh, I know.” He fidgets a little, drumming his fingers on the railing. “I’m just here for the view.” 

Rouge gives him a sidelong glance. “Not quite what it used to be.” 

“Nah. But a lot of things aren’t, these days.” 

Is that an invitation? “Seems that way,” she says slowly, still gauging if he wants to do this. “Are you, ah… okay?” 

It’s more awkward than she means. 

And unfortunately, it seems to scare Sonic off. He waves a hand. “I get why you ask – believe me, I do. But I’m not here to mope.” 

“Then what are you here for?” 

“Honoring tradition.” 

Rouge raises both brows. “What tradition?” 

“Checking in on a friend.” 

Rouge raises a brow.“I would have had to drop in on you, if that were true,” Rouge says. Sonic’s expression goes from lighthearted to a little embarrassed. She knocks the back of her hand against his shoulder before he can overthink it. “No, stop. You’re right. You can check in. I lost a…” She pauses. “Friend.” 

Sonic’s face goes the tiniest bit pink. He smiles. “Never thought I’d hear you say that.” 

“And you’ll never hear me say it again.”

“The friend came back, though.” 

“That he did.” 

Sonic just shakes his head, smile still in place. But when he stops, his eyes fix on the ring, still around her wrist. Shadow’s been back for over a year now, and yet, she still wears it. 

She thinks Sonic’s going to say something about Shadow, maybe, or the last time they were here. 

But then she realizes he’s staring at the communicator tucked next to the ring. 

“The funny thing is,” Sonic starts. “...I’m kind of here to say thank you, too.” 

Rouge looks at him closer. “I’m sure I don’t know what you mean.”

Sonic meets her gaze for just a second. “Can we not drag this out? I’ve got places to be. Just let me say thank you, so we can never talk about it again.” 

“Like before?” 

Sonic looks away quickly. “I mean, kind of.”

He stares up at the sky.  The Death Egg is no longer in the sky. The only thing out there is the half-ruined moon.

“Before, we still talked a little .” Rouge turns away from the sky – so that she’s facing the opposite way as him, leaning her back against the railing and sliding closer to him. Almost close enough for their shoulders to brush. “Aren’t you going to let me talk about how I lost a friend after barely getting to know him?” 

“I wouldn’t say barely,” Sonic mutters. 

“I would.” 

Sonic chuckles, but only half heartedly. “Look… we don’t have to – you know. It doesn’t have to be a big thing. I’m just glad you lied for me.” 

Rouge’s stare gets the tiniest bit more calculating. Good. So he doesn’t know what she really did. “Me? Telling a little white lie?” Rouge asks. “How could you suggest such a thing?”

“Virtue’s overrated,” he says. He’s probably being sarcastic, but Rouge can’t help but wonder. He answers her question before she can even pose it. “I mean – it’s not. Sorry. That’s a dumb thing to say. But I’m still just – thank you, okay? For not telling anyone the truth. I don’t know how much you saw, but…” 

He’s actually a little flustered. 

It’s wrong, Rouge thinks. It’s wrong that he’s not okay, and this out of sorts. But there’s some part of her that’s morbidly fascinated with how genuine he’s being. 

She wonders how many people have actually met their hero when they met their hero. 

“You’re welcome,” she says. “But don’t expect me to start doing it all the time.” 

“Not sure I love you taking the moral high ground here, Rouge.” Sonic’s voice is surprisingly dull. A little more monotone than she remembers. He crosses his arms and leans more on the railing, eyes fixed on the city below. All the battles that took place and were lost. “Is it that hard to keep it to yourself?” 

Rouge frowns. It’s not just the words themselves. With Sonic’s voice so monotone and serious, he sounds a little like Shadow. She can’t help it – it unnerves her. Especially considering what they talked about here. 

She doesn’t want to think about Sonic in that context. Especially not after what she saw. What nearly happened. 

“He had a lot of walls up,” Sonic had said, about Shadow. “And he didn’t want to let anyone past them. Knowing what I know now… I kind of get it. Thinking that your only purpose is bringing destruction to everyone around you. If I was in his shoes, I…”

The bracelet feels heavy on her wrist. 

Rouge shakes off the feeling. 

“I’m a gossip, but I’m not that bad,” she says. “If I tell anyone, there has to be something in it for me.” 

“Well, is there?” 

She leans closer, and reaches for his arm. It’s supposed to be comforting. He touches the fox kit’s hair all the time, pulls him in for a hug when he needs it. And Rouge is willing to bet Sonic hasn’t had many kind touches in the last six months. 

But she over-estimates what he wants, and Sonic flinches back.

Rouge lets go quickly, a rare apology on her tongue. “Sorry, big blue.” She pauses a moment. “...did I touch a bruise?”

Sonic avoids her eye-contact, and places his hand over his arm, where she’d touched. He- really is bothered by this, Rouge realizes. She’s surprised. Usually, he can take her flirting and responds back pound for pound. Friendly flirting, casual touches – he laughs it off. Likes it, even. 

This time, he just looks uncomfortable. “Yeah, still healing,” he says – though Rouge highly doubts she actually aggravated an injury. But they’re excellent at covering for one another, aren’t they? “No big deal though.”

Rouge frowns and files that away in her mind. She won’t touch him again unless it’s really warranted. She backs up to give him an extra foot of space, almost back to the distance they had before. She tries to make it look more casual than intentional, but she feels Sonic’s eyes on her every step of the way. “As long as no one will yell at me for roughing up the man of the hour,” she says. “Even if you are accusing me of lying.”

“Rouge…” Sonic pauses. He swallows. “Can I change my mind? Can we not do this?” 

She frowns. “You were the one who came here.”

“I know. Just…” He looks down, the toe of his shoe against the ground. He can’t meet her eyes anymore. “All I really want to know is what you saw.”

Rouge doesn’t miss a beat. “What Eggman used you for.” 

“Nothing else?”

“ Is there something else?” Rouge asks – and surely there has to be, with a tone like that. 

“No,” he says quickly. 

Rouge doesn’t believe him for a second. She narrows her eyes imperceptibly. But there’s something small in the way he holds himself. She would feel bad pressing. “If you say so. If you really want to leave, I won’t stop you. I couldn’t, anyway.” 

Sonic looks a little more relieved. His shoulders relax, and he closes his eyes as he feels the night air on his face. “When did you come?” 

“…The day before you broke out,” she says. “I saw you hooked up to that… thing.” She frowns, glancing to one of the burns on his chest. The one that looks freshest. “I’m pretty sure I was there when you got that.” 

Sonic follows her gaze, and he self-consciously pats at the burn. “Oh, this? Nothing. Eggy just wanted to make sure I knew my place,” he says. “You know. Before he banished me into space.”

Rouge bites down a pained smile. “I didn’t have time to come up with a better lie.” 

“Yeah. Maybe he would have though, after he was done. Who knows. All I care about is that we didn’t have to find out.” 

Rouge makes an unconvinced sound. 

Sonic pays her no mind. He pats his chest again, on top of the spark burn, and he looks a little more solid, less like a ghost, when she looks at his face again. “...I’d appreciate it if you do one more favor for me, though.” 

“I didn’t think we were the types of friends who asked for favors,” Rouge says. “I only do favors when there’s something in it for me.”

They both know that’s not true, at this point. But Sonic doesn’t call her on it. Instead, he rubs at his arm. 

“I’m sure you’ll find some way to spin it in your favor. You always do.” Sonic goes quiet for a long moment, looking out at the night sky again. It seems to take him time to figure out what to say. Finally, “...Listen. Some of our friends are asking questions. But everyone will be happier if they don’t know the details. And I’m kind of sick of people asking questions and worrying themselves over nothing.”

“That’s a funny way to talk about your friends caring about you.”

Sonic rolls his eyes. “Fine. Here’s what’s in it for you. It’ll keep Knuckles a lot happier, if he doesn’t know the details. And a happy Knuckles is less vigilant.” 

Rouge’s mouth quirks to a frown. “Tempting,” she says. “But he’s already plenty happy now that he’s back on his island and no longer leading a resistance. And…” She trails off. “...it’s a pretty big secret.”

“The Master Emerald is a pretty big gem.”

Sonic would never actually endanger Knuckles’s Master Emerald. Somehow, he thinks Rouge is playing along. 

“...Uh huh… and, what about your other friends? Knuckles isn’t the sharpest, but others might ask.”

“Is it really so hard to just keep quiet if someone asks? I thought you were a spy.”

Rouge raises a brow. “I am. But some of your friends are very smart. Like Tails.”

Sonic glances at her out of the corner of his eye. “Leave Tails out of this,” he says. Wary. There’s actually a hint of danger in his voice – Rouge doesn’t know what to make of it. If she looks closely, she thinks she can even see some of his quills starting to puff up. 

He’s mad, she realizes. He’s actually angry. 

“I would ,” she says, because she’s not afraid of him yet. “But he means something to you. And you mean something to him. Not much point in hiding a secret that will obviously have an impact on the both of you.” 

“Don’t tell him anything. There’s nothing ‘in it’ for you to talk to him. So leave him alone. He’s gone through enough.” 

Rouge narrows her eyes. 

“I mean it,” Sonic says. Just as intense as before. She wonders, for a second, if there are species of hedgehogs that are venomous – or if this one is just more chaos charged than the rest. “He’s – he’s a kid. He doesn’t need any other problems.” 

It’s jarring, seeing him say that when he’s years younger than her. 

What’s Sonic other than a kid himself? 

“Fine. I’m not going to tell him anything. Or at least, not intentionally,” she says, and watches closely, considering him as he relaxes. As some of those sharp spines settle back into place. “But you’re making it sound like you’re taking this to the grave. Are you?”

“I already came back from the dead. There’s not even a grave to take it to anymore. Besides,” he says. “Death was never really in the cards for me if Eggman had his way. Right?” 

Rouge stares at him. 

Remembers what they talked here, years ago, about a little too clearly. 

Sonic seems to realize what she’s thinking about almost as quickly as she does. 

“I’m not Shadow,” he says immediately. He reaches for her wrist, holding her in place. She can’t completely tell who it’s meant to reassure. “I mean it. There’s not any risk of – we don’t need to talk about that. I wouldn’t do that, so don’t make any of this into something it’s not. I want to be here. I would never – even though Eggman was using me like that, I- I would never want to hurt people. I didn’t want any of that. But I didn’t want to die, either. All I wanted was to get out of there and be back with my friends. I want my life back. And- now I do have it back. So it’s all good.” 

He means it. Sonic actually means it. Not even he could fake that kind of urgency. Rouge lets out a relieved sigh. “Good. Or else I was going to kick your tail in.” 

Sonic laughs. 

It breaks the tension. 

But instead of making her feel better, Rouge realizes she hates it. 

She hates this gray area of being his friend but barely knowing him, and still not really trusting each other. This isn’t exactly what she was worried about, back before she lost Shadow. Back before they were anything like friends, when her biggest concern was not knowing Sonic’s motive, his real drive. 

She can’t stand being friends with someone whose motive she still doesn’t understand. Whatever he’s getting out of heroism, she doesn’t know, and it scares her. Because this is something that could have killed him, and he’ll go back to being a hero in a heartbeat. 

It’s like he’s not selfish enough to even have a motive. 

But Rouge is selfish. 

And she’s tired of losing friends. 

Yes – they keep coming back, but they always come back a little different.

So Rouge needs to know his motive, if they’re going to keep being friends. If they’re going to keep doing this. Meeting up on sentimental rooftops and sharing feelings for one second before pretending like it doesn’t matter and no one said anything important at all. 

“Sonic,” she says. “Be honest with me.” 

Sonic looks at her, a little surprised at the change in tone. 

“It’s easy to say it benefits everyone else not to ask questions or worry needlessly. But what’s in it for you , me not telling anyone?” 

Sonic’s smile freezes. Then he swallows. “I mean… that’s why I said it was a favor.” 

“Negotiations aren’t free. Everyone gets something. And no one’s that selfless, not even you.” She looks at him as severely as she can; puts the same energy into it that she does when interrogating as a spy. “What do you want out of this, Sonic?” 

“I…” 

“What is it you don’t want people knowing? They already know he hurt you. They already know that he kept you alive. What’s the part you’re so fixated on keeping it a secret? Are you embarrassed that he didn’t hurt you worse?” 

Sonic pulls back, actually offended. “No! They’d be relieved, if anything – I’m not trying to keep them from feeling better about what happened to me. It’s not like I want to make them fear the worst. They’re probably eaten up inside about it enough as it is–” 

“No, stop. I’m asking about you. Not them,” Rouge reminds him. 

Sonic bristles, but Rouge isn’t intimidated. 

“Tell me. What is it?” 

Sonic makes a noise she didn’t think he could make. It’s almost a hiss. Not an aggravated, whiny groan like he makes when he’s impatient with a battle. He sounds frustrated. Angry. Utterly done with this conversation, and with her.

Rouge doesn’t bend. Not even a little. 

And finally, Sonic has enough. “The only thing I want is for people to stop making me do anything – anything – I don’t want to do.”

“I’m not going to make you tell me,” Rouge says. “No one is keeping you here. So don’t act like this is the same thing.” Sonic opens his mouth, but Rouge cuts him off. “ You came here . Now say what you’ve been wanting to say, or go.”

Sonic is surprisingly taken aback. 

“Eggman made me into just a – a thing,” he finally says. Tense. Tired. 

He waits for Rouge to cut him off. 

She doesn’t. Just keeps the tension up, because Sonic will never not react under pressure. So she lets him spill whatever secrets he needs. Because this rooftop is theirs, and he needs it far more than he’ll ever admit. 

“He used me to conquer the planet,” he says. Pauses. 

And she thinks, it’s here that he realizes she’s not going to stop him. 

“He used me to conquer the world, and it only took six months. I thought – all of our friends really thought that I was dead, just like that. And they tried so damn hard but they didn’t manage to hold ground on anything . What little they did hold was because Eggman needed something as leverage or I’d just–” He cuts himself off, waving off the end of that sentence. “I’m just waiting for them to realize that it was because of me. That every awful thing that happened the last six months were because of me. Eggman only took over the world because he used me, not just because I wasn’t fighting him. I can’t let them down. And I can’t let GUN or the Federation or anywhere know what he did, or else–” He sucks in a sharp breath. “People are scared enough without knowing I can be – be used for that. Someone else is bound to try to take me instead of trusting me to do what I always do.” 

His chest heaves. 

Finally, he stops. “Is that the confession you wanted?” 

Rouge nods. “I didn’t want to stop you. I think you needed that.” 

Sonic purses his lips. He looks like he swallowed a lemon – there’s regret on his face, but she won’t let him dwell on that. Instead, Rouge turns the pressure up again. “GUN won’t do anything, you know.” 

Sonic looks at her warily. “Why’s that?”

“Because I’m not going to tell them.” When Sonic doesn’t immediately believe her, she tosses her hair. “Please, like I want them to have ultimate power. They’re so drab. They’d make awful dictators.” 

It doesn’t fully win Sonic over, but it’s a start. 

“Anyways, I’ve told them for years you’re a far better ally than a threat. If they turn on you I’ll just pretend to play along and then sabotage their machine,” she says easily. “As for the rest… I didn’t think you needed someone to tell you that wasn’t your fault. Especially since it looks like you exhausted all your options for sabotage, too. If people did know, they’d have to be crazy to think it’s your fault.” 

Sonic crosses his arms tight against his narrow middle and looks away. Like she can’t still see the hollows of his cheeks and the shadows under his eyes. 

She can’t tell if he’s thinking about her mention of sabotaging machinery, or if he’s just pouting because she’s calling him on his wholly undeserved self-blame. 

She chooses the latter, partly in hopes to keep him from thinking too hard about the former. She still doesn’t want him to know the truth about his escape. 

“...Do you need someone to tell you it wasn’t your fault?” she asks. 

Sonic stubbornly doesn’t answer.

With a face like that, it’s easy to remember that he’s only sixteen (barely) to her nineteen. Rouge sighs. 

He’s just a kid, isn’t he? 

“Well, whatever you think, you’re wrong,” she finally says. Sighs, rubbing the bridge of her nose. “Listen… I’ve helped out prickly hedgehogs before. If you need to talk… We’ve talked before. We could do it again. Like you came here for. If you’re willing to talk instead of getting angry.” 

For an instant, Sonic looks like he might actually take her up on it. 

“I think I’ve said enough,” he finally says. “Plus… I came here to thank you. That’s it.” 

Well. As long as they’re lying to each other. Rouge sighs and shakes her head. “You’re welcome.” 

“Then we’re good?”

He is anything but. She hasn’t forgotten that he still looks like hell – and that’s just physically. 

Rouge wants to entice him further to stay and talk. 

But the fact remains that she doesn’t know him well enough to say the right thing. Clearly – since she’s already given it her best and failed. Maybe she was useful back then, when he was younger and hadn’t been through this yet. Maybe she was someone he trusted when there weren’t stakes. 

Maybe, she thinks – 

Maybe he finally offered a hand of forgiveness one time too many. Maybe he trusted in his ability to save the world one too many times.

No wonder he doesn’t want to trust someone with his feelings. 

Rouge would love to know the right thing to say. To help. 

But part of her isn’t sure there is a right thing to say. Maybe Knuckles would know – or Tails. But those are also the ones she’s been banned from talking to.

Her shoulders drop, and she sighs again. “Have it your way,” she says, as airily as she can. To give the illusion that she doesn’t care, before caring too much burns them both. “Do whatever you need to do. I think it’s stupid, but I have nothing to gain by ratting you out. I’ve got places to be, gems to steal, Master Emerald guardians to annoy. It would only slow me down if your friends tried to beg the truth out of me.” She pauses; gives Sonic a significant look. “I don’t owe them anything. And there’s really nothing I stand to gain by telling them.”

The sudden switch clearly throws Sonic for a loop.

He stares at her for a long time before he finally asks, “You promise?”

“My, my, isn’t my word good enough on its own?” she purrs. 

“You don’t do anything if there’s not something in it for you.”

“Which is why I won’t seek them out to tell them.” She looks at him, expression hardening. “And I’ll do my best not to let them catch me, either. I can be pretty sneaky when I want to be.” 

Sonic huffs, almost glaring at her. It would be almost cute, coming from him – if he didn’t look like he’d been through hell.

“It’s alright. I wouldn’t trust me either. But I’ve got to get going. Believe me or don’t, but there’s not much you can do but trust me on this, is there?” She looks over her shoulder. “I don’t think there’s anything you can offer me to persuade me. After all, the only thing that really gets me going these days are the chaos emeralds. And they’re all still… missing.”

Sonic wisely does not fess up to their location. 

She smirks a little. “That’s what I thought. I’m going home – and you should, too. It’s late.” 

“So weird that you still think I live somewhere.”

Rouge rolls her eyes. “Then keep crashing on your friend’s sofa. And… Sonic?”

He looks warily up at her. “Yeah?” 

“Don’t be too stupid about this. Get some sleep. Eat, even if it’s bound to be those disgusting things you like so much. You’re worrying your friends.”

“What’s it to you?”

“Unfortunately, some of your friends are my friends,” she says. “And I refuse to comfort anyone on your behalf.” 

Sonic rubs the back of his neck. Grudgingly looks like he’ll consider it. But instead of agreeing, he shakes his head almost fondly. “ Goodnight , Rouge.”

It’s the best she’ll be able to do, she thinks. She winks and flies away, and tries not to let the guilt eat her from the inside out. 

But if there’s a right person to comfort Sonic, Rouge isn’t it. 

She flies home to Shadow – who she does know how to comfort, a little. For his role in all this. She wonders if he, an experiment, would have anything to say to a hedgehog living as a generator for six months. 

Probably not. 

[amugoffandoms]

saw SIX on Broadway on Monday and here are everything I thought of/details I recognized during the show! Nicole went on as Boleyn that night as well, so whenever I say Anne/Boleyn, I'm talking about her version of Boleyn!

also a lot of caps and keyboard smashing because why not o.o

THE SWCOND I HEARD THE OPENING NOTES FOR EX-WIVES I WENT, OH SHIT ITS STARTING FUCKERS GET READY HRRE WE GO..

literally everything looked so cool from my seat (I was in the rear mezzaine so some specific details might be a bit lost o.O)

SPARKLY COSTUMES

Holy shit they sing so well and I am just WOW

literally I was juet in awe

also the lights in the back very funky

Audience interaction!!!

hi Queens :D

the protestant line from Parr (Joy) was really funny o.o even when Katherine (Sam) looked at Parr and was like ??? until she explained

the Thomas Cromwell line was really funny even though I've heard it so many times

WELCOME TO THE SHOW TO FHE CORONATION WHO WILL TAKE THE CROWN AS THE POP SENSATION EVERYBODY KN-

ARAGON!!! (Adrianna)

MARIA GIVE ME A BEATT

I SIDNT REALIZE THAT THE LIGHTS ON FHE BACK WALL THING GLOW UP EVERYTIME SHE SAYS "OKAY."

Aragon motioned for everyone to come closer and they were like ??? And then OH.

then she was like "I don't think I'd look that good in a wimple..." and all the Queens nodded like "yes, queen very true.."

THERES NO WAY, YOU MUST AGREE THAT BABY IN ALL THE TIME-

YES ARAGON GO OFF QUEEN???

that part where they acted like a church choir was so cool I was wow wonzaj

literally I fucking loved it

dancing dancing

I got distracted for a second and then they were doing the line where Aragon is on her knees and I focus again and they're just staring at the audience like: "anything?? I'm waiting???"

YOU'VE GOT NOTHING TO SAY IM NOT GOING AWAY THERES NO WA-

yes go off aragon!!

I WON THE COMPETITION AND I HIT THAT TOP C SO YOU KNOW...

the really famous one that people actually care about

BOLEYN INTERLUDE

I saw Anne (Nicole) move closer to the centrr of the seat/stair and I was confused for a second and then I REMEMBERED IT WAS THE BOLEYN INTERLUDE

YOO LETS GO DLYH

GREW UP IN A FRENCH COURT OUI OUI BONJO-

Nicole got into that role my God Anne actually felt like someone who knew and didn't know what she was doing

DONT BE BITTER, 'CAUSE IM FITTER im PRETTY SURE SHE SAID THAT LINE WIFH AN ACCENT

THE PART WHERE THE MARRIAGE MUSIC PLAYS ANNE LIKE WALKS LIKE SHE HAD A BOUQUET AND ALL THE QUEENS ARE CRYING AND THEN SHE THROWS THE BOUQUET

when that uappens like all the Queens reach for the bouquet [Anna (Brittney) grabs Katherine's hair] AND THEN WHEN SHE SAYS, "HOLD UP LEMME TELL YOU HOW IT WENT DOWN." everyone moved back in position

YES ANNE TELL HENRY OFF

Oh shit she about to die o.o

The red lights felt like danger o.o (also I had just watched like those off Broadway heathers but I point out the small details like a few days before and I kinda recognized them from the Yo Girl song??)

"IM NOT SORRY"

DONT LOSE YOUR HEAD

THE LIGHT WAS LIKE JUST ON ANNE'S HEAD LIKE??

what a weekend, I'm like dead wait didn't you actually die?

CATHERINE WAS MASSIVE CU- I WAS LIKE HOLY SHIT WAIT DONF AIQOKWK

Jane (Keri) DID LITTLE HOPS OR SOMETHING TO HER SPOT ON STAGE AND I JUST FOUND IT KINDA SWEET LIKE??

I was lucky.. (The queens look at her) I was really lucky..

honestly I was so excited to hear Keri because I hadn't heard her before o.o

MY GOD GO OFF JANE WTF

THE TRUTHFULLY PART I WAS LIKE OH MY GOD...

YEAHHHHH YOU CZN BUILD ME UP YOU CAN TEAR ME DOWN YOU CAN TRY BUT- (HONESLTY I WAS JUET IN SHOCK, I FUCKING CLAPPED SO LOUDLY)

HONESTLT I CANT ITS UUST LIKE OH MY GODD I FANT..

YOULL STILL FIND STONE MY HEART OF STONE

HONESTLY I DIDNT NOTICE MUCH BECAUSE I WAS JUDF SO EXCITED TO LISTEN

BUT HEY SHE HELD HER STOMACH LIKE SHE HAD A CONNECTION TO EDWARD IM GRASPING AT STRAWS BUF LIKE HEY..

I fucking CLAPPED during the ending

cause what hurts more than a broken heart? A severed head.

I FORGOT HAUS OF HOLBEIN EXISTED AND THEN WHEN THE SMOKE CAME IN INWAS LIKE: !!!! WAIT!!!!

he had to change his location settings if you will

IN ZE HAUS OF HOLBEIN JAAA DAS IST GUT OOH JA

MY GOD IF WAS LIKE SOME BIG ASS PARTY MY MOM WAS BOPPING ALONG AS WELL LIKE

AT LEAST YOUR COMPLEXIOJ WILL BRING ALL THE BOYS IN

To hold everything up o.o

TIE THESE HEELS SO HIGH ITS NAUGHTY, but we can not guarantee that you'll still walk at forty ;)

yes let's fucking dance bitch yes

oh the lights are o-

NEVERMIND

THE HAUS OF HOLBEIN

CHRISTINA OF DENMARK (PARR) FUCKINGNTURNED AROUND AND LOOKED AT THE RED BOX LIKE: "bifch what..." AND LOOKED TOWARDS BESSIE LIKE YOU SEE THIS RIGHT??

OKAY SO AFTER ANNA GETS PICKED AND THE QUEENS WALK OFD STAGE, PARR STAYS BEHIND JUST TO SAY THE HAUS OF HOLBEIN AND JOY IS FUCKING FLEXIBLE LIKE SHE BENT BACKWARDS SLIGHTLT LIKE O.O

Anna's like entire speech about how tragic her life has been is so funny

LIKE EVEN BRITTNEY FUCKING PAUSSS BEFORE TRAFIC AND LIKE THROWS OJF LIKE SYNONYMS OF TRAGIC OR WHATEVER LIEN AIQJOWJS

Here WE GO GET DOWN MOTHER FUCKERZ

release the bitches woof

I'm sorry but the fact that the Queens have to keep thr most stone cold face during it is so funny like??

profile picture time bitcjez

IM THE QUEEN OF THE CASTLE

she fucking grooved during the grt down part like

And then the profile picture part was funny like her face and her hand movement like Ishwia

ANNA WAS LIKE "....hey." DURING THAT ONE PART AND I WAS LIKE ??? HEY WHO IS THIS??

THE COSTUME REVEAL?? WOAH I FORGOT BOE COOL IT WAS

keep the applause for a few minutes Anna yes

when she says like, "I look my rad than LUTHERANISM.." She fucking skipped I think??

OKAY LADIES LETS GET REFORMATION.

The face she makes after she says, "that I tricked ya" is so funny like o.o

oh my GOD THE OPERA SINGING PART WHEN SHE SAYS GET DOWN YOUNDIRTY RASCAL INWAS LIKE WHAT THE FU K. HELLO? HELLO?? IT WAS SO AMAZING HUH

she did the "heyyy.." again and it was really funny

I'm not saying im a gold digger, but check my prenup (AYE) AND GO FIGURE

when she did the "MY HORSES CAN TROT UP TO 12 MILES PER HOUR" She did the thing and I was like uHM.. O.O

IM A WIENER SCHNITZEL, NOT AN ENGLISH FLOWER

the Queens did the money thingy with their hands and I was like o.o WOA

like during the tricked ya line the Queens sing Britt does a little dance like o.o I'm pretty she also said "oh how you doing?" But honestly I'm rewatching a slime tutorial to remember what she did during the thing so I can't remember details o.o

HENRY. NO. YOU CANT STOP ME.

I'm the Queen of the castle :) GET DOWN YOU DIRTY RASCAL >:)

SO THAT PART WHEN AN AUDIENCE MEMBER GETS UP AND DANCE THE AUDIENCE MEMBER WA SLIKE ME?? AND TOOK A SECOND TO GET UP AND DANCE AND ANNA WAS LIKE, YEAH YOU COME ON LETS DANCE

"Cause I'm the Queen of the Castle." yes QUEEN GO OFF.

so yeah it was really heartbreaking. That doesn't sound difficult at all?? Oh yeah, you're right. I probably won't win then, BACK TO THE PALACE!!

THE ONE WHO ACTUALLY HAD PROBLEMS TO DEAL WITH.

my son had to deal with the loss of his mother. oh wow, kinda like how my body had to deal with the loss of its head. Queens, come on now. Can't you see what's happening? Comparing your losses isn't gonna change the fact that I've already won. :)

honestly the entire dialogue before Katherine's roast is HILARIOUS

same! Yeah, same! Nice neck by the way. :) (high five)

WHEN ARAGON DID THE LINE ABOUT THE CHICKEN POX AND JANE CAME IN LIKE SOUNDING LIKE SHE WAS WHINING NSIANIW

"oHhhhh, bAbbYy MarRyyY had the CHICKEN POX and yOouu didn't get to hold her hand!! you know it's funny because wHennN I wanted to HoLld MyY nEwborNn SonNn, I DIED." (casually poses)

GUYS I HAVE THE PLAGUE!! (What?) LOL JUST KIDDING MY LIFE'S AMAZING.

it's time we heard from our next Queen, K. Howard!! (I CASUALLY WOOOO!)

oh uhm I think she was the least relevant Katherine.. oh yeah i still don't care (Nicole oddly made it sound like she was going to say something else but then said that and Made it sound like regular dialogue?? I don't know lol)

IM SORRY BUT KAT'S ROASF WAS SO DUNNT.

your lives sounded terrible!!... and your songs.. :)... your songs... your songs REALLY helped to convey that.

I'm sorry but when Kat roasted Anne, I COULD NOT. "divorced, beheaded, died, divorced, behea- oh, nevermind." AND MOCES ON LIKE WHATJ IWMWIWMW

Jane, dying of natural causes... WHEN WILL JUSTICE BE SERVED?? (SHE RAISED HER HANDS AND I STILL FIND THAT FUNNT)

and surviving........... (moves on AND I FOUND THAT FUCKING HILARIOUS LIKE THE LONGSILENCE) Parr looked at Bessie again I think and was like my God she did not..

All jokes aside, being rejected for your looks, that legit sounds really rough. I wouldn't know anything about that. I mean, look at me, I'm really hot.... (She like paused like uh... so uh..) SO ICANT EVEN BEGIN TO THINK OF HOW I COMPETE WITH TOU ALL.. OH WAIT, LIKE THS..

durinf kat's roast, BRITTNEY HAD TO LOOK AWAY BECAUSE SHE JUST COULDNT I

YES BITCH AYWD LETS FUCKING GO..

bro I was so excited for this song like I EAS JUST EXCITED

I think I saw Anna run back on stage probably after a break o.o

NOT THE STONE COLD FACES AGAIN.

I was 13 (innocent voice), going on 30 (regular voice??)

MAJOR TO MINOR, C TO D (IT WASNT AS HARSH LIKE IN SLIME TUTORIAL, BUT IT WAS FUCKING HILADIOUS EITJE WAY.)

YES GO OFF

ew hands.. get off her you fucks o.O

the dancing oddly seems more innocent and she got into the dancing??

playtime

SHE DRAGGED THE ASS PART OF ASSISTANT FOR A BIT AND I WAS LIKE OH OH OKAY

"favorite quill" AND SHE OUTS BITH OF HER HANDS ON THE MICBKKE I DIDNT KNOWCWTATBDHE MEWMT.. I KNEW KATHERINE, I KNEW..

CHORUS PART 2 THE DANCING FELT SIMILAR TO LAST TIME SO I DIDNT REALLY NOTICE ANYTHING

I can't rememv34 how she said it, but when she was talking abou5 how th4y employ women to grt them into their private chambers, she sounded a bit tired?? Like of all the men??

"you'll never guess who I met!! tall, large!.. Henry the viii...." LIKE WHEN SHE SAID HENRY'S NAME SHE WEBT SO SERIOUS FOR A MOMENT?

To be honest the dancing was really funky loved it :D

she tries to get their hands off of her :( and then they return :(((

SHE OOOKED SO TIRED OF EVERYTHING DYRING THE 3RD CHORUS LIKE.. KATHERINE HONEY I WILL HUG YOU WIRH TOIR CONDENT VUT

the queens casually close in on katherine

so we got married... woo?

KATHERINE NO HE IS NOT A FRIEND I KNOW YOU WANT ONE BUT-

casually knocks away the hands away :)

he says we have a connec...tion.. (PAUSE FOR THE HANDS AND THE DISAPPOINTMENT AND PAIN. [I THINK SOMEONE LAUGHED LIKE NO GAMERBOSS NO..]) I thought this time was different. Why did I think he'd be different? but IT'S NEVER EVER (THE EMOTION WHEN SHE SAID EVER HUH??) DIFFERENTTTTTTTTTT NOO NO.

BRO KAT SOUNDED LIKE SHE WAS ABOUT TO CRY LIKE SHE LITERALLY HWD TO PAUSE OCCASIONALLY LIKE SHE WAS SOBBING

IN FACT THINK SHE PROBABLY WAS??

I WAS LIKE WHAT??

NO NO NO NO I LOVE YOU PLATONICALLY KAT PLEASE NO TEARS I WILL CRY

I WAS SO SURPRISED

HER VOICE WAS SHAKING I THINK AND SHE KITERALLY WAS GOUNG TO CRY??

WHEN WILL ENOUGH BE ENOUGHIES?? she sounded so heartbroken I could not..

PLAYTIME'S OVER.. THE ONLY THING, THE ONLY THING, THE ONLY THING YOU WANNA DO IS MWAH. (BRO SHE SOUJDED LIKE SHE WAS CRYONG WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK.)

THE LIGHT ON THE EHAD

she like casually wipes her tears and waits until the applause is over (which takes a while o.o)

...and then I was beheaded :)

Seeing as I won the competition, I want to thank all the men that got me to where I am today. (KAT SOUNDED LIKE SHE HESITATWD FOR A MOMENT??) Couldn't have done it without you. Thank you, New York! Good night! (All the Queens come in right before she ends and like tells them to stop ending the show o.O)

There were four choruses, that's how much sh- I had to deal with. Yeah, yeah, sorry, when you died, your son had to live without a mother. Wait, that was me and no one cared when you died.

It's not her fault no one remembers her bland and uneventful life. :)

Parr looked at Kat for a moment like, "You okay??"

THREE HISTORICALLY CONFIRMED MISTRESSES. OH, YEAH? WELL, WHEN I WAS QUEEN, I HAD NOT ONE, NOT TWO, BUT THREE MISCARRIAGES!! WELL, YOU KNOW WHAT, ANNE BO-LOSER?? I HAD FIVE MISCARRIAGES!!! SOMEONE HOLD ME BACK- (Anna like walks towards Catalina like bitch woAH CALM DOWN UOLD ON..)

Parr just stands there like uh.. yeah uh.. I'm.. uh

ALSO PARR LWTS FUCKING GO (MY FIRST FSVOTITR QUEEN)

jazz music energy??

Someone in the audience laughed and then Anne went, "hahaha, what?" I find the timing very funny

When Joy said, "wOAH-" when the light shone on her it was really funny o.o

What gets the biggest cheer, trauma or abuse? Woohoo! (yes queen)

"I'M CatHerIne ParR! I dRaW thE liNe in arbItrAry pLacEs!! BLAH, blah blah." KATHERINE JSIAJWOWJWJW (SAM SOUNDED LIKE SHE WAS MOCKING PARR AND WHINING AT THE SAME TIMEBAUWJAKWJ)

All the Queens literally clap while Cathy tries to stop them and they're like, "Yes, Catherine, yes. Congratulations." and then Parr turns to face the audience like, "you see this?? You see this??"

Are you sure, Catherine? Are you sure you're not tired from BACKING VOCALS? (DAMN BIFCH WTF ajJAJSNS THE AUDIENXE ALL WENT OOOOHH... LIKE OH MY GOD KATHERINE JWKAKQ)

Go on Queens, take a seat :)

honestly the Parr dialogue was just so interesting to listen to even though I know it well o.o joy made it interesting :D especially the gold star for Cathy Parr part sinajajw

Tudor womanhood, would recommend. :)

She sounded so disappointed and sad during the part where she talked about Thomas and then how Henry came in

IDNYL STARTING...

SHE SOUNDED SAD AGAIN :(

FEELS SO RIGHT.. IM HOLDING BACK THE TEARS TONIGHT... :((

The singing was... on Parr. (JANE WOULD BE PROUD OF ME FOR THAT ONE.)

but seriously, the singing was amazing

Somehow I had that choice... No holding back I'd raise my voice! I'd say Henry, yeah, it's true, I'll never belong to you! (ARAGON UNCROSSED HER LEGS AND LOOKED AT CATHERINE FOR A MOMENT BEFORE ANNE GOT UP AND EVERYONE STARTED TO AS WELL.)

JANE HESITATED WHILE GETTING UP LIKE HMM SYMBOLISM?

THERES NOTHING YOU CAN DO! I DONT NEED YOUR LOVE, NOO NOOO. (yes queens vibe with Parr yes) I DONT NEED YOUR LOVE, NOO NOOO.

But the thing is I can't say that. Not to the King ;(

So this is goodbye. All my love, Cathy.

YES LETS GO CATHY COME ON

I find that fheees probably some kind of symbolism/metaphor/whatever when she distances herself away from the other Queens to show that she'd rather not have her story aligned with the other Queens and Henry, but would want it to be about HER if you understand. But also because, well, not in the competition

THAT I WAS A WRITER. I WROTE BOOKS AND PSALMS AND MEDITATIONS. YES QUEEN YOU DID!!! ALSO JOY MADE THIS LINE SO EXCITING I THINK??

YES QUEENS HYPE HER UP

I DISAPPEAR ;(

Wait I don't get it? Okay, look, why does anyone remember who we are? MY SIXTH FINGER!! (AND SHE LIKE HELD UP HER OTHER HAND TO MAKE IT LOOK LIKE A SIXTH FINGER AND I DIDNF KNOW THE ACTORS FKR ANNE (OR MAYVE JUST NICOLE) DID THIS THAT WAS SO FUNNY.) Put it away, babe.

When Cathy asked who Henry the VII wife was, everyone looked at Anne like, "you know bitch??"

We don't know. CATHERINE DE VALOIS!... (And then she pauses and Anna looks at her like, "...girl-") I MEAN- We don't know.

But isn't there a bigger problem?? The dissolutions of the monasteries. No. I'm talking about us. Because as soon as we get together as a group- Everyone notices Jane can't dance! (AND THEN JANE TRIES TO DEFEND HERSELF LIKE, "UHM- HOLD ON, UH-")

THE SIX SOUNDED SO SAD ;(

Oh my God, I get it! Since the only thing we have in common is our husband, grouping us is an inherently comparative act and as such unnecessarily elevates a historical approach ingrained in patriarchal structures. (Anne says it like you're SUPPOSED TO KNOW SHES SMART AND TO BE HONEST, YOU SHOULD /J but honestly it was just really funny.) Yeah. I read.

So, basically, we' re stuck. What a waste of time. I guess there's not much we could do about it now. (And now they scatter across the stage and are just standing there like. Uhm. Hm. Hm . Well. Uh. [I think Parr was just leaning against thr stair thing near Maggie]

I DONTNREMEMBER WHEN BUT IT WAS PROBABLY HERE WHEN AN AUDIENCE MEMBER SHOUTED "SING TOGETHER!!" AND THEN KATHERINE RIGHT AFTER SAID HER LINE ABOUT FIGHTING THE WHOLE SHOW OAIANQ

We could have done like a fake competition, showing us how messed up comparing us is. Then, we could have found some cool way to reclaim our stories or all become the leading ladies. Aw, we could have done it as a song! :(

If only we'd thought of it before.... ;)

SO WE HAD NO CHOICE. BUT NOW ITS ALONE. SO WE GOT NO CHOICE. NO WE GOT NO CHOICE. WE'RE TAKING BACK THE MICROPHONE. IM GONNA RAISE MY VOICE.

YOU NEED TO KNOW!! I DONT NEED YOUR LOVE, NO NOOO. NO I DONT YOUR LOVE!!

PARR'S TURN GET READY

YES JOY GO OFF!!!

NOO I DONT NEED YOUR LOVE.. NOO

YOU CAN GET ON OUT!! YOU CAN WALK ON OUT THE DOOR!!

OH MY GOD THE SINGING AGAIN AHT WUF8CK

NEW YORK, WE HAVE A VOICE!! WE SAID WE HAVE A VOIIICEEE! (i THINK WHE GOT INTERRUPTED BY THE CHEERING SOWUJAA)

Well, actually- Now's not the time, Catherine :)

WOOOO FHE CHEERS

ARE YOU READY FOR A ROYAL HAPPY EVER AFTER??... Well, we don't have one. (that STILL IS so funny to me oh my hod)

They all walk off stage and I'm sitting there like, oh you lying you LYING

WAIT, THIS IS OUR SHOW AND WE CAN HAVE WHATEVER ENDING WE WANT!

ARE YOU READY GUYS

ONE OF A KIND, NO CATEGORY, TOO MANY YEARS, LOST IN HIS STORY, WE'RE FREE, TO TAKE OUR CROWNING GLORY, FOR FIVE MINUTES!!! WE'RE SIX!!!

Well, I wouldn't mind going first for a change JAKAJSJWUW

I FUCKING HURT MY HANDS CLAPPING TO THE BEAT BUT ALSO CLAP TO THE BEAT

LIKE YES I WILL PARTICIPATE WITHOUT HESITATION

YES REJECT HIM ARAGON YES LETS GO GIRLBOSS

NO WAY PACKED MY BAGS AND MOVED INTO A NUNNERY

I CHANGED A COUPLE WORDS AND PUT IT ON A SICK BEAT

THE SONG BLEW THEIR MINDS NEXT MINUTE I WAS SIGNED, AND NOW IM WRITING LYRICS FOR SHAKESY. P

HONESTLY LETS JUST FUCKING VIBE

WEVE MADE A BAND AND GOT QUITE WELL KNOWN. YOU COULD PERHAPS CALL US THE TUDOR VON TRAPPS.

ONLY KIDDING!! WE'RE CALLED THE ROYALLING STONES (CAUSALLY DOES A ROCK POSE YES QUEEN) (ALSO ANNA WAS LIKE GIRL PLEASE NO AND TRIED TO STOP HER AKBASIJW)

CLAP TO THE BEAT AGAIN

I KNOW THE DANCE TO THIS BECAUSE OF HOW MANY TIEMS IVE SEEN THE CHORUS IN SLIME TUTORIALS

ALRIGHT WHO WANTS TO GO NEXT?? I GOT THIS.

SO I MOVED TO THE HAUS OF HOLBEIN IN MY HOME TOWN. HIS FRIENDS WERE SUPER ARTY BUT I SHOWED THEM HOW TO PARTY.

NOW ON MY TOUR OF PRUSSIA, EVERYBODY GETS DOWN

MUSIC MAN TRIED IT ON BUT I WAS LIKE BYE (YES QUEEN YESSSSSS!!!) SO I THOUGHT WHO NEEDS HIM I CAN GIVE IT A TRY!!

I LEARNED EVERYTHING AND ALL I DO IS SINNNGGGG (OH MY GOS YES PLEASE YES GOOD FOR YOU!!!) AND ILL DO THAT UNTIL I DIE.

ALL THE OTHER QUEENS GO INTO ROCK/POP POSES AND IM LIKE YES.

HEARD ALL ABOUT THESE ROCKING CHICKS LOVED EVERY SONG AND EACH REMIX SO I WENT OUT AND FOUND THEM AND WE LAID DOWN AN ALBUM

NOW I DONT NEED YOUR LOVE ALL I NEED IS SIX AWWW..... THAT'S SO SWEET..

clap BITCH CLAP

WE'RE ONE OF A KIND, NO CATEGORY. TOO MANY YEARS LOST IN HISTORY! WE'RE FREE TO TAKE OUR CROWNING GLORY FOR FIVE MORE MINUTES

WE'RE SIX, WUHH OHH WOOHHH WE'RE SIX WUHH OHHH, WE'RE SIX, WUHH OHHHH WOHHHH, FOR FOUR MORE MINUTES.

Not the END OF THE SHOW PAIN..

THE CURTAIN HAS BEEN DROPPED THOUGH, LIKE MY JAW /J

WE'RE ONE OF A KIND, NO CATEGORY. TOO MANY YEARS LOST IN HISTORY! WE'RE FREE TO TAKE OUR CROWNING GLORY FOR THREE MORE MINUTES!! (GET YOUR HANDS UP!!)

CHORUS AGAIN AND THEN WE DANXE CUKCERS

SOME OF DANCES ARE DROM EX-WIVES BUF THEN TWISTS ARE ADDED TO THEM I FIND IT KINDA LIKE HOW THEY DIDNT LIKE EACH OTHER THAT MUCH BEFORE THE SHOW BUT THEN BY THE END, THEY KINDS FORGAVE EACH OTHER AND BECAME BETTER FRIENDS AND PEOPLE LIKE!!

WE'RE SIX FOR FIVE, FOUR, THREE, TWO, ONE MORE MINUTES!!

WE'RE SIX!!! CONFETTI WOOO

NEW YORK CITY!! DO YOU WANT ONE MORE SONG? MARIA HIT IT!

I WAS WOOING SO MUCH DURING MEGASIX

STAY ON YOUR FEET, NEW YORK!! I WANNA SEE EVERYBODY CLAP THEIR HANDS. BUT MOST IMPORTANTLT, GET READY TO DANCE!

LADIES IN WAITING!!

OH MY GOD I WAS SO READY AND HAPPY

YOU MUSTBTHINK THAT IM CRAZY YOU WANNA REPLACE ME

DONT WORRY DONT WORRY DONT LOSE YOUR HEAD, I SIDNT MEAN TO URT ANYONE!

you CAN TRY BUT IM UNBREAKABLE, YOU WANNA DO YOUR BEST BUT ILL STAND THE TEST

LET'S GOO!!

ALL ALONE ON THE THRONE IN palace that I HAPPENED TO OWN THE ONLY THING YOU WANNA DO TOO BAD I DKNT AGREE

ALL YOU WANNA DO ALL YOU WANNA DO IS SING ALLNG TO YOUR FAVORITE QUEEN'S SONG (WOOS EVEN MOEE)

I DONT NEED YOUR LOVE NO NO ITS TIME TO RISE AOVE WOAH WOAH

WE DONT NEED YOUR LOVE (CASYALLY TRIES TO SING BUT BECAUSE I WAS JUST YELLING I WAS PAINCULLY OUT OF TUNE ANDI KNOW THIS HECAUDE I TOTALLY DIDNT RECORD ANYTHING)

CAUSE WERE SO MUCH MORE THAN

diVORCED

BEHEADED

DIED

DIVORCED

BEHEADED

SURVIVED

WE'RE SIX!! (ONCE AGAIN I PAINFULLY FAIL AT BEING ON NOTE.)

PICTURE TIME ON STAGE

OH BOY THAT WAS AN AMAZING SHOW

GUESS WHAY HAPPENS NOW I GET MERCH OH MY GOD I WAS SO HAPPY IM WEARING IT NOW AS I TYPE THIS LAST LART

I WANTED TO DO A BIT OF STAGE DOOR BUT I WAS LIKE SO NERVOUS SO THE ONLY PERSON I DID ACTUALLY TALK TO/TAKE A PICTURE WITH WAS NICOLE AND I GOT HER TO SIGN MY PLAYBILL...

ALSO SAM AND ADRIANNA LEFT BEFORE I LEFT BUT I DIDNT SAY ANYTHING HECAUSE THEY WERE DOING OTHER STUFF SINWIWJWJ

BUT ANYWAYS I COLLECTED CONFETTI FRON FLOOR AND WE LEFT

AND THEN I RAMBLED ABOUT THE SIX WIVES OF HENRY THE VIII WHEN WE GOT HOME AUWHUWJDU

OVERALL!!

I had such a fun time at SIX and I'd love to go again when I have the time/money to go!! The show became one of my favorite things during quarantine and as I got back into it late last year, early this year, it was so fun to revisit old videos I used to watch and start watching new Queens (including the Broadway cast!!)

Thank you for reading my long writing about SIX because I love it so much, good night (day/evening)!

[sanchoyo]

danny phantom season 2, eps 1-5 thoughts! opening the new season with episodes like these kinda blew me away. we had multiple serious episodes INCLUDING a two parter!! also, valerie :)

see prev episode thoughts in this tag <3

-I don't know what I expected s2 to open with. but danny portal incident in more detail was not it. (also, I hate to break it to you, sam, but danny's parent's bigass ghost hunting rv def chugs more gas than those vehicles, lmao. unless it runs on ectoplasm or something...)

-WHY WAS DESIREE IN THE SEWER? HAVING TEA WITH IT DOWN THERE?? Her making the giant cow come alive is a boss move, we've almost had all of my fav animals as ghosts now <3 I also don't like how sam was expecting danny to just, haunt the place so the cars wouldn't get sold? I KNOWWW I know she's 14 (and I had a very annoying phase like this, I think I mentioned in a previous post, I GET IT) but they're HIS powers, and messing with (1) dealership will not really put a dent in sales overall because they can just move the cars to another sales lot, and it certainly wont change the industry anyway, it's more of a minor annoyance for (1) location. Also, usually people who work at car sales places work on commission, so if they dont make a sale, they don't have money to pay bills, or eat. sam baby if u wanna be an activist you need to like, actually look into these things. with as much money as her parents have, she could be doing a lot..more useful things for causes she cares about? it's frustrating to see someone with resources who doesn't know how to use them. but shes 14 so again. cannot be really upset :/

-IS THIS A PREDATOR VS TERMINATOR VS FREDDY KRUEGER MOVIE BUT THEYRE ALL WOMEN?? you know, sam is so right to be excited about this. /I/ want to see this movie. that rules

-paulina inviting danny and friends to her quinceañera, aw! even if it is just to get phantom to show up :') and there'll be a meteor shower, and we KNOW danny wants to be an astronaut!! there's not a meteor shower every night!! the tickets are non-refundable, but..she's rich? like. gotta agree with danny, they never get invited!! I KNOW it's the principle of keeping promises, but if she was that upset, she should've said something. directly. I hated how she was like, passive aggressive about it through the episode, like you SAID IT WAS FINE, THAT YOU'D GO TO THE PARTY TOO. MOVIES SHOW FOR A FEW WEEKS IN THEATERS. IF YOU HAD A REAL PROBLEM YOU NEED TO TALK ABOUT IT. WE'VE HAD THIS PROBLEM BEFORE, SAM. YOUR FRIENDS. ARE NOT. MIND READERS.

-MR. LANCER GOING AFTER THE GHOST WITH THE FIRE EXTINGISHER LMAO

-this outfit is everything . anytime the show does an over the top cutesty pink outfit i WANT IT. it looks like shit I wear JKASDHF I HAVE a bow like that and a pink sweater. I need leg warmers </3

-SAMS GOTTA RE-HALF-KILL HIM??? thats fucked up. but also, he finally got his logo!! it took until s2!!! this episode was lowkey very fucked and I felt like it glossed over a lot. does sam have guilt about like. kinda KILLING HIM?? I know, he also agreed and walked into the portal. but. she made the choice to redo it SO quickly (even if it was because someone had to beat desiree) and danny, during their fight, brought up a lot of stuff sam's done in the past, meaning he was holding onto those memories and resentment was building. (I KEEP SAYING HE LOWKEY NEEDS THERAPY, BUT I THINK MOST EVERYONE IN THIS SHOW KINDA DOES) which...is a red flag? and then they didnt even GO to the party URGH I know she tried to make up for it, but it really felt like Sam fucked up and barely faced any consequences and got everything she wanted in the end. I KNOW it's a kids show obv they aren't going to go too in depth, and she undid the damage, kinda, but...I DUNNO how to articulate it but it rubbed me the wrong way.

-but on a note about desiree, her powers of wishes were STRONG ENOUGH TO ERASE NOT JUST THEIR MEMORIES, BUT DANNY'S POWERS?! fuck, if I was danny I'd be like, trying to make friends with her. I know they always have horrible side effects as most genie-granted wishes do, but...c'mon, I'd at least TRY to be like 'I wish no ghosts would hurt anyone in my town' or 'I wish vlad would lose his ghost powers forever no matter What and also forget about my mom' LIKE. SHIT DESIREE IS SO POWERFUL. rewriting reality powerful, basically!! appreciate her. respect her.

-aww, sam helping tucker pass the nurse's office so he wouldn't see because he's afraid of medical stuff? very sweet. I also don't like medical stuff, I've gotten a lot better at handling it tho. but seeing blood and needles still makes me feel lightheaded x_x

-FOLEY, BY TUCKER FOLEY. I want to make my own perfume, that's so cool. even if his first attempt isn't good, he's pretty consistently shown to have an inventor/entrepreneur streak in the show, so like. I can see him inventing or making something (or several somethings) that make him $$$ when he grows up :) proud of my creative son

-I know the 'creepy abandoned hospital on the edge of town' is a joke and the creepy hospital trope is so Worn Out, but in my town we actually DO have a hospital like that! my dad was born in it, but its not in use and hasn't been for, like, 20 years! it needs to be torn down but I think the city doesn't wanna pay the money. the inside is horrible, spray painted and broken glass and shit everywhere. but there's still like, rusty equipment and fucking DOLLS all over the place. the cops drive by it pretty frequently to make sure no one is like, breaking in. (because of water damage, some of the areas really aren't safe. also, asbestos, but people still go in anyway) but also, some of my town was used in a filming for a stephen king show. So it's lowkey spooky all over. just a fun personal tidbit :) to lead into saying, any hospital abandoned for any period of time is NOT safe to quarantine these kids in JKSAHDKF like I KNOW it's a ghost trying to do this, but NONE of these parents are even like, 'well, why dont we keep them in the regular, working hospital'....YIKES. this hospital looks pretty accurate to the one in town. grungy and spooky.

-fentons are tax evaders confirmed by jack's fear of being audited, lol no one is surprised

-ghost sickness via ghost bugs. horrifying concept. I actually expected it to be a new villain, not dr. spectra again! this is a very elaborate scheme. her new form rules, love the new costume. the way none of the bg kids seem to recognize her as their old school councilor. did we just forget about that completely?

-dash watching romance movies in the fucked up ghost hospital. same.

-'oh please, you're ghosts, do you have any idea what YOU smell like?' no, tucker, what DO ghosts smell like? I genuinely didn't know they would even have a smell, I actually want to know now.

-it feels like a while since we've seen jazz!! i was happy to see her again, even if she was a head in a jar for most the episode. I want another jazz-focused ep!!

-we finally see danny doing space-related stuff!! him and his friends stargazing to open ep 3 of s2. cute :) until, GHOST PIRATES!!!!! ...ghost pirate captain is a small child?? VOICED BY TAYLOR LAUTNER???

-oh, the easy listening is ember's song instrumental slowed. 'vapor drone' THEY VAPORWAVED HER!!! ember in a pirate outfit tho >>>>. and the cruise being called m.bersback JKASDHJK. ember adopting a little pirate brother is also pretty cute. concerning this teen and little kid have such bad opinions of adults, like, who hurt you?? (how did you DIE ALSO?? im always lowkey curious about that. we know desiree died at an old age, but her ghost form is young, probably mid-20s, so I wonder how that sort of thing works...its a more mental thing, isn't it?) but ghost team-ups are always cool to see, even if ember bailed after danny took her guitar. I guess she probably thinks youngblood can handle it (which, he's been owning danny this far in the ep, so...fair)

-tucker got that sponsorship from nasty burger for their radio!!! again, opportunistic money maker king, love to see it!!!

-danny taking control of the kids SO FAST. he makes a pretty great leader. no one is surprised, im pretty sure I said I think he's the most mature of the trio, once again, correct, because he's taken on so much responsibility already. all the teens suiting up in the jumpsuits to go save the adults and taking the ship over with a BLIMP. OKAY LETS GO. this feels like it should be a mid finale or straight up finale.

-...speaking of finales. why is ep 4-5 of s2 combined into a 50 minute episode? I havent even clicked play and im concerned. weird placement, like, this season JUST started and we're getting a two parter? okay...why are the episodes placed like this? why not put this at episode 10 or something, for a mid-season thing?

-this is also a cute dress. possibly my fav dress so far. can her parents give ME cute dresses, I'LL wear them.

-it turns out the castle fright knight was in is called pariah's keep and there's something worse than fright knight in there! lovely! fuck off vlad wtf are you doing <3 your hubris <3 is going to literally get you killed <3 'ring of rage' and 'crown of fire' are great names tho. ...vlad turning into a super polite guy when he was scared of mr. pariah was hilarious. and fright knight doing the same...I mean, it makes sense, he's a knight, he serves a king? happy to see fright knight again either way :) vlad telling him to call him tho, lmfao. you WISH HE WOULD. (I wish hed call me, too. 😔)

-so...jack being genuinely concerned about vlad...maddie really didn't tell him what happened at the cabin, did she. damn. if I was her id immediately come home and be like 'YOU WONT BELIEVE THIS SHITTTT THIS CREEPY GUY--' like, I feel like that stuff you need to tell your partner!!! I know she didnt want Jack to think she was an irresponsible parent putting danny in danger at that time, but STILLLL. maddie spilling boiling tea on him. get his ass. how is jack this oblivious to his wife's discomfort with vlad!! ughhh

-fenton wipe (tm). trademarked toilet paper.

-DANNY AND VALERIE BEING FRIENDS??? :D that was a cute moment. 'hey val <3' and 'if you like him like him, make a move, or someone else will ;)' at sam...damn!! I love her. valerie go for it girl!!! I hate how sam and tucker treat val also, like I GET IT YOURE PROTECTIVE AND DONT TRUST but if anything him befriending valerie will help when she finds out or he tells her like I feel like she'll be more understanding that they think! ALSO I feel like her reason for not liking ghosts is valid, like you haven't really explained the full story to her anyway! she doesn't seem to have any other friends after being booted from the a-listers so im like :( but seeing them kick butt together again was nice <3

-the ghosts all RUNNING FROM PARIAH DARK IS NOT GOOD, I thought he sent them to attack or something, but no. why doesn't someone just tell desiree 'hey i wish pariah dark would die' lol. once again I think she can solve every problem <3 but seeing all the enemies in one place, being civil and hiding together? love it.

-you just know danny's gonna have to clean up vlad's stupid mess. also, jack being willing to put on the ectoskeleton pants to help maddie, as soon as vlad heard it could kill him, he suggested jack do it instead of helping maddie himself? this is why jack got the girl, my man.

-ghost skeletons. how do you end up as a skeleton ghost in your afterlife instead of a humanoid like most the ones we've seen? lmao

-the ghosts just making new homes in various stores. I'd totally be setting up in an expensive clothing store if I was a ghost.

-valerie's dad is possibly the most useful adult so far, with that ghost shield expansion!!! and valerie saving vlad and danny, even tho shes been thru it already, shes still so good!!! this family rules.

-danny: *gently caresses valerie* :)

-*then he immediately TELLS HER DAD ON HER. and his first response is 'are you okay?' :'( such a good dad...

-*me every time fright knight breathes* youre doing SO great sweetie :)

-the fenton suit thing is so silly looking. does anyone take this thing seriously

-ALL THE GHOSTS FIGHTING WITH DANNY <3 AAAAA. and the fact that pariah isn't perma-defeated, but just locked away again. yikes. he'll probably get out again, won't he? it wasn't too clear, but if vlad DID make a pact with fright knight, I am rabid. I will beat vlad to death with the fenton bat (tm). YOU DONT DESERVE A COOL KNIGHT.

-valerie being direct with sam and challenging her? kinda love that, even tho I normally don't like 'catfight' type situations. because sam has been very passive aggressive about it which is annoying. valerie knows wtf she wants and wasn't even embarrassed to tell sam, but she did tell her, giving sam time to make her own move! and sam denied it and got embarrassed/mad! and sam did have a chance when danny was about to go off and fight, and she hesitated and didn't tell him. I feel like she's hesitating because they're friends and it might make it weird between the trio (poor tucker would be third-wheeling) but if u snooze u lose, u gotta GO after what u WANT girl. smh this is a No Tsundere Zone. 😤

[revchainsaw]

The Crow (1994)

Alright Cult of Cult. Do I really need to introduce this one? Let's get all 90s and gothy and maybe brace ourselves for a bit of cringe, but like in a fun way. It's the Holy Grail of Hot Topic, 1994's the Crow Starring Brandon Lee.

Sermon

Apparently before the auto industry totally crashed Detroit was already a total fucked to death pile of burning shit, or at least that's what the crow would have you believe. Sorry Bruce Campbell, and other people from Detroit, but mostly Bruce Campbell. According to the Crow the city of Detroit is the kind of place where gangs of warlock anarchist arsonists will bomb buildings, and murder and rape whoever they feel like and then walk around bragging about it the next day with absolutely zero consequences. Funny then that if Detroit was so bad they had to go to film this movie in Wilmington North Carolina which is definitely a fucked to death pile of burning shit. I can say that, I'm from there and I got the fuck out. My brother is going to kill me if he ever reads this. (It's okay, these are all jokes people). Did you know they also filmed the Super Mario Bros movie there ... also cuz they needed a really shitty looking distopia. Moving on ...

The ludicrous criminality of the Crow's Detroit is particularly on display on Halloween. In Detroit (apparently) Halloween is known as Devils Night and it's legitimately just a night of pure lawlessness and chaos and kids aren't even safe to get candy, except later when we do see trick or treaters. Eric Draven, hunky goth rocker who sort of looks like he could be Bruce Lee's Kid and his fiance are murdered by a gang of vicious criminals. One year hence, Eric is resurrected by a mystical crow (that is actually a Raven), to exact his revenge on the gang that murdered him.

He paints his face like sad Alice Cooper and refuses to listen to Joy Division, just covers. He murders Tin Tin (a knife guy) just for his long gothy duster, he murders Fun Boy and forcibly ejects heroine from her arms and tells her "Go be a good mom now" which actually works. (have I told you about our Lord and Savior Sting? He gave me the strength to get off drugs), he blows T Bird up dick first, and then comes for Skab? Scraap? Scooby? in a meeting of all of Detroits villains and just about kills them all.

He is supported by the most 90s little girl to have ever graced the screen, and I am here for it, and Officer Albrecht, who's played by Ernie Hudson but I like to call him Zeddemore: The Most Underrated Ghostbuster. The leader of the bad guys, who I cannot beleive wasn't played by Brad Dourif or Tom Waits, is pretty interested in the occult. He keeps his witchy girlfriend around and she makes him fun dishes like smoked eyeballs, and her main use is that she knows that the Crow is the Crows weakness. They set Tony Fucking Todd on the bird, and I guess you just have to hurt the bird and not kill it, and Eric loses his healing factor and other macabre undead powers.

The Crow, Jimmy the Raven, pecks out Dr. Girlfriends eyeballs, I honestly forget how Tony Todd gets offed, and Top Dollar gets Gargoyled (that is impaled on a gargoyle). Funnily enough that is more Gargoyle related impaling on screen then in the actual movie Gargoyle: Wings of Darkness where a Gargoyle is supposed to have impaled a guy.

The Benediction

Best Feature: Injustice League

In the Crow we have not only a set of super memorable villains but they are played by the bad guy all stars. John Polito as the most lowly of the bad guys as a kind of sleazy pawn shop owner who buys ill gotten gains. Tony Todd, who's size is really on display here, the freaking Candy Man is in this movie. T Bird is the head of Top Dollars goons and is played by David Patrick Kelly, you might know as the "Warriors Come Out and Play!!" bottle guy from the Warriors, or as Jimmy Horne from Twin Peaks, and of course Top Dollar himself is played by Michael Wincott. Wincott is not a particularly celebrated actor but has played villains effectively in Robin Hood, the Three Musketeers, and Dead Man.

Best Set Piece: Detroit Style Hot Dogs

The Set design of the Crow is perhaps one of it's most fantastic features. It's very moody and ethereal. It's just real enough to not take you out of the film, but fantastic enough to set mood and theme above realism. From Eric Draven's apartment, to the church where the final battle occurs they are all fantastic. I think that's why I really wanted to shine the spot light on a very minor set piece that would get nary a mention but just as effectively represents the qualities I was just talking about and that is the Maxi Doggs Hot Dog Stand, where a lot of the films exposition for audience surrogates takes place.

Worst Effect: Freeze Frame

At a few points in the movie the film makers made a strange decision to do these freeze frame transitions. I only noticed it twice in the movie where it was particularly stupid. I'm sure the film makers at the time thought it was a moody and atmospheric choice that highlighted the suffering that Eric Draven was going through, but it didn't age well. If you don't have the sensibilities of a goth girl from 1994 then it's very very hard not to laugh at just how self involved the movie is about it's super sadness.

Worst Feature: Tragic Accident

Solely based on the film itself, it is that very gothic and dated sensibility that hurts the Crow. The little sarcastic dance he does when he flees the police, quoting Edgar Allen Poe, and bowing to Albrecht. These affected behaviors that I'm sure seemed snarky and right on to the target audience only serve to make Eric Draven seem like an unbearable neck beard edgelord and not the troubled dark soul he's supposed to be. I'm sure at the time it seemed unique and gothy but that shit went out of style for good reason, people could see through it. It's a shame that the Crow himself was some of the cringiest parts of this movie now that I'm seeing it as an adult and not a 13 year old middle class boy with no real problems.

This however is not the low point of the movie. It's not news now and if you're reading some dudes review of The Crow on Tumblr then you probably already know the story. The worst thing about The Crow is that Brandon Lee was horrifically killed on set while filming this movie due to some negligible prop malfunctions. A series of unfortunate events that lead to the actor spending 6 hours in surgery fighting for his life before eventually passing. It was not a quick or painless death and it's really impossible to watch the movie without an appreciation for the fact that this kind of fun dark adventure was going to be a vehicle for Brandon Lee's career wound up taking his life. He was 28. I really wish I could have just bitched about the goofy goth stuff and moved on, but that's not the world we live in.

Best Effect: The Gargoyling

Maybe I should have called this best kill. But I'm not sure which it is. The slaying of Top Dollar at the Climax of the film was just super effective. The pointed wings impaling his chest and that horn coming out of his mouth, it was morbid and excellent and just fit the tone of the movie perfectly. I mean how many other movies can you say Cause of Death: Impaled on a Gargoyle.

Best Bird: The Raven

I tried very hard to look up the name of the bird that primarily performed in this movie and could not find anything. There was a Raven once upon a time called Jimmy the Raven, but that was in the 50s and I don't think birds live that long. There was a team of Ravens performing as the crow, they were chosen over crows for their larger size, and more imposing silhouettes. I just think it's so wonderful to see these often maligned birds get a chance to show off their talents. Corvids of all kinds are incredibly intelligent creatures. Im a sucker for animals, if you haven't already figured that out. I really liked seeing the ravens hit their marks, particularly the one whos job it was to drop the wedding ring into Sarah's hand at the end of the film. You can see that greedy little bastard do his trick and then look of camera at his trainer like "treat please!". It's very cute.

Best Actor: Top Dollar Performance

I'd love to take this opportunity to just put praise upon Brandon Lee, he truly gave everything for this role, but unfortunately with what was put to film we actually have very few character moments with Eric Draven. Stuff happens to him, and he does killings and fights. There's definitely some personality, but I felt like I walked away knowing almost nothing about who Eric Draven was. He was clearly a good dude but that and a few hobbies and a relationship and you don't really have a character yet. He's unfortunately not given a lot of acting to do, instead just relegated to stunts and action sequences. That were notably cool.

The bad guys in the Crow have a lot more character and among this who's who of character actors, Michael Wincott takes the cake. Hell he was standing next to Candyman himself, Tony Todd and still stealing the scenes.

Best Character: A Few Good Apples

Is the best character in The Crow really going to be the cop? The commissioner Gordon stand in? yeah, it is. Not to be political, but I don't like cops, but I guess in a world with magical birds and eyeball smoking I can suspend my disbelief and let Ernie Hudson be #1 cop dad. His character is really the heart of the film, since all Eric can do is brood and fight, we have to care about someone in this movie.

Best Sequence: Halloween Party

The best sequence of the movie is of course the scene where Eric Draven busts in on the Devil's Night party planning commission. I think Top Dollar brought Scrappy Doo there just so he could lure out the crow, knowing the baddest assholes in all of Detroit would be gathered it was likely that somebody was going to kill the beast, or if they couldn't at least Top Dollar could get a feel for his enemy. It's a bullet flying action sequence with a ton of weight. I can't put my finger on this all to common weightless third act problem that big budget super hero and action flicks have nowadays, but whatever that issue is, the Crow does not have that issue. From this point on the Climax feels earned and I am invested. For that reason, The Crow is honestly better in spite of its awkwardness, than many of the super hero movies out today.

Worst Sequence: My Guitar Gently Weeps

Speaking of brooding or fighting. The best sequence was fighting, the worst is brooding. I get that Eric was in a band or something, but didn't he have shit to do. It seemed like it was a cool idea for a shot, but for like a whole seen, watching somebody play an 80s guitar solo, that stood out so brazenly from the choices of music in the rest of the movie was extra corny. It felt like someone's( dad trying to relate to their kid. Oh you like Music. The Dresden Dolls eh? Oh man, then you're going to love Slash's Snake Pit!

Summary

The Crow is dated. It is iconic but I wonder how many of the people that hang that poster on the wall have watched that movie since they were kids. It's interesting how what i've liked and disliked about this film have changed so much sense I was a kid. It's a cheeseball fiesta. If you have matured at all beyond thinking that being sad is the same as being deep then you're going to like it a little less than you did when you were younger, but it is still solid. There's not much to hate on. I'd watch it over and over again. I was really afraid it would not hold up at all, but returning to The Crow was a completely positive experience.

Overall Grade: B

[marcholasmoth]

OSRR: 2576

i had therapy first thing this morning. it was nice to talk to christine and catch up.

it was also nice to not wake up in excruciating pain. i guess doing those massages worked really well for me. considering it's been hurting less and less, and i can actually shift my jaw and eat things now, it's going pretty well. i'm excited. and, as i write this at 2am, i have almost all of my hearing back. hell yeah. it's still a little tender to the touch, and my jaw is still a little sore and tough to open, but it's way better than it was.

today i helped my mom with her service project. it's not technically her service project, but she was in charge of organizing it and stuff, but she wasn't able to be there in person as people made them. which yielded results that were frustrating and pathetic at best. i'm fixing them. but the issue is they need to be hand stitched, and apparently the women in the peterborough ward don't know how to sew?? isn't that, like, a basic mormon woman skill??? in the merrimack ward it was. ask anyone and they could tell you how to fix something. shit dude, fuckin. backwoods bullshit.

anyway, the end results are honestly sad. 100% frustrating. 100% makes me mad. like?? they're so poorly constructed?? how do you take pride in shitty work???? do you know what a job well done actually is?????

anyway.

i got my mothman dice in the mail!!! they're PERFECT!!!!

i love them so much.

i also finally opened the box of giveaway stuff i was sent by @arrow-guy who (1) is an angel and (2) did a giveaway, the only part of which i could remember was the blind date with a book. and i gotta tell you, i was SO excited to be recommended a book by a friend. i've done the "blind date with a book" before, and it ended up being the first book in the tales from earthsea series by ursula k leguin, which was fuckin awesome. this one that erin sent had the words "post-apocalyptic" and "space colonies" in the description, and i was like "THAT ONE I WANT THAT ONE." and i said i'd open it as a reward after finishing my paper, and i'm all done with my paper, so i saw it today and remembered i hadn't opened it. so i grabbed it and i opened it and oh my GOD was it spectacular. SO MUCH STUFF. HOLY SHIT.

OBSERVE.

SO MUCH GOOD STUFF IM SO EXCITED

and salvation day is a THRILLER and i'm SO EXCITED TO READ IT. i'll probably spend the rest of the week reading. i'm excited. all of this stuff is fuckin awesome. i'm so happy. @arrow-guy you ROCK. FOREVER.

i got a phone call today from someone that i couldn't figure out what they were saying, so i had to listen to the message half a dozen times to figure out the girl was saying "boxlunch at the mall." apparently i had completely forgotten about an order i had placed, and it was in, so eventually today i went and got it. i turned the simple trip into an excursion and i invited hannah and kianna along, but kianna was tired and didn't want to leave the couch (which, yknow, mood), so i picked up the stuff, picked some other stuff out, went to hot topic and picked up other stuff, went to the lindt store for chocolate for mom, and went to get froyo, and after that, we went to hang out with nick and kianna and eat our froyo together.

but look upon my spoils, for they are many.

i also got some other things too. like a t-shirt and chocolate.

overall a pretty good day. spent a lot of money. talked a little bit to joel. talked to myself about my worry over FF, because for all i talk bit about "hey i'm absolutely in love with you" it's not even that. they're just. they're really just my friend. i think they're fascinating and i love talking to them. sure, i fell a little bit in love with them. but it's the same with everybody i meet. i always fall in love with people a little bit. how can i not?

anyway. i'm worried. well, maybe not worried-worried. concerned, i guess? because it's been total radio silence for a few days and that's really out of character from the last few months, but their friend has also been not so active, so i assume it's because school has restarted. and i know i shouldn't worry so much, because i'll give myself ulcers and worry myself into an early grave. but they're my friend! and i give a shit! a big shit!! i care about their mental health and i want them to be okay. i thought about reaching out, and asking them how they're doing, but there's that constant issue of "i've dug myself into a hole because i keep telling you i love you and i've made every interaction awkward from here on out." so i wish for death. but mostly i wish for them to be okay, to be good, to be thriving in their real life. i don't want them to feel like they need to isolate. i just want them to know that we as a group miss them, and that i as an individual miss them, and that it's not because i'm madly in love with them or anything. i actually wish i could start over with that, honestly. if i didn't just fuckin stop functioning when i first saw their face, if i didn't look at everything they do with stars in my eyes, it would've been better. kaiku, i'm sorry. god, i'm a disaster. i need to change my tag.

[riftimagines]

hello 💓 if you're accepting requests (feel free to ignore), I'd really appreciate it if you wrote something about sett. for a few weeks, his girlfriend avoids him because someone tells her that she is too much trouble for him after finding out she's hiding an eating disorder and self-harm from sett. she believes this person and decides it's realy the best if she just disappears from his life. sett finds out and immediately goes to find her? fluff and soft boi sett? 🥺❤ thank u ❤

I had actually did headcanons for this but it just got too long so I turned it into a  one shot! I hope you don't mind that and you still like this!

Sett x Self-harming!Eating Disorder!Reader

Warnings: Trigger Warning, Attempted Suicide, Self Harm, Minor Character Death, Minor Blood, Minor Swearing.

Catching the eye of the infamous Ionian pit fighting ring boss seemed impossible but lo and behold one trip to the pits with some adventurous friends and now you hardly ever leave his side. Ever loving and charming in his own gruff way. He always made you feel normal and happy even on days where you didn’t feel right. When you felt empty and not enough food could fill it or even the thought of food made you want to throw up and never eat again he was there to make all the badness go away. Everything for once felt decently right and you could just live as best as you could with someone that actually loved you for you. Too bad that didn’t sit well with some of the more envious eyes.

A green monster’s eyes stare into the back of your head with bitterness. Why would their tough, strong, handsome boss care for such a weak, pathetic nobody like you? You weren’t even a fighter for deities sakes! So what made little worthless you so much better then them? They were stronger, better looking, and didn’t have weird eating problems. They just needed you to leave him since Sett seemed so adamant on staying with you. Unfortunately for you the opportunity for them to strike arose rather quickly when Sett turns to you.

“Hey, babe I need to check in with my bookies for the nights payouts, you keep my seat warm alright?” You nod happily and he grins and gives you a quick peck on the cheek before walking off to the bookies office. As you sit there you can’t help but feel a looming presences behind you. Turning around you spot one of Setts underling fighters looking at you. They take your look as an invitation to saunter up to you and glare down at you in Setts seat. You can feel the bubble of anxiety building up in your abdomen as they stare you down. They pick up a fruit from the table next to the seat your in and they lean in close as they bite down on the fruit hard enough that you could feel the juice from it land on your cheek. You cringe at the sight and your are not sure if your want to eat a fruit or throw up at the thought of eating it. They chew for a moment before before speaking to you.

“So your the boss’s new arm candy? Must be for charity or something.” Your brows fur in confusion and you glare up at them. They snort loudly and eat more of the fruit.

“I mean why would such a man like Sett like a little broken thing like you? So feeble, useless really, I heard you can’t even eat right. Here, have a fruit.” They toss one of the same fruits they were eating at you. You catch it and stare at the fruit like its a foreign object. It looked edible but then could you stop eating or would it just make you gag? As you contemplate the fruit your harasser just laughed.

“See, you can’t even decide if you want to do a basic human function. Even babies know what they want. I feel kinda bad for the boss. He has to put up with you and whatever the hell is wrong with you. Such a pain in the ass if you ask me. He probably just stays with you so he looks nice to better people. You know attract the better normal people.” You look down in shame. Sett wouldn’t do that to you, would he? No, he wouldn’t, but then again he didn’t know the broken side of you. The days of eating mindlessly or not eating at all for a couple days or the days where  you did eat but just threw it all up. He didn’t know that you would physically beat yourself up about it. The scars that criss crossed across your arms, a daily reminder of the darkness in your mind. As your mind wondered the underling observed you and realized what you were thinking.

“ Oh, he doesn’t know does he? Now your a lier as well as a broken waste of space. You know, if you really supposedly love him wouldn’t you want him to be happy with someone who’s probably better for him in the long run. I’m sure you know as soon as he finds out about your little eating problem he’ll want you leave you for something better. Might as well save yourself some pain and let him go first don’t you think?” You felt a horrible familiar pain in your heart. It would be better for Sett if you weren’t around being a ball and chain. He could most defiantly do better then you. He deserved someone better then you. The fighters eyes brightened as the seeds of doubt were now planted in your head. It would only be a matter of time before your out of the picture.

“You just think about that, huh? If you can’t be good for him let him have someone who is good for him. Don’t let him suffer your problems. He doesn’t deserve your problems, no one does.” They say that last part with bitterness and a sharp in your face glare then made their leave back to the corner where they came from. So many things running through you head. Sett loves you right? Yeah he does, of course he does and you love him, but he didn’t know about your problems. He didn’t know that you had trouble with eating or how much you hated your self because of it. He doesn’t know that your a dirty lier that hasn’t been honest with him about all your faults. The fighter was right, you needed to leave Sett, he needed someone so much more then you. A perfect, honest, wonderful person for a wonderful, handsome man like him. You were lost in thought for who knows how long until a large shadow overcast you. Sett looks down with you with his lovely sharp toothed grin and dipped down to kiss you.

“Hey babe, I’m back everything’s good to go. You ok there hun? You look a little sad. Did someone hurt you? Just tell me babe I’ll make sure they’ll never hurt you again.” He cracks his knuckles and neck and looks around for any potential culprits.

“No love, I’m just tired its getting late thats all.” You tell him. More lies. Another fault and reason why Sett should be free from you. He looks a bit skeptical but he doesn’t push and instead settles down in his seat next to you and holds you close to him. He was so warm and comforting. So much more then you deserved. Starting tomorrow Sett will be free, no matter how much it would wound your heart.

The following weeks were so incredibly hard. You had been avoiding Sett like a plague and it was waring on your very soul. Every time he wanted to see you you would leave or make an excuse. Any dates he wanted to make you’d say no. He’d be so confused and sad but you’d take off before he could say anything. Everyday now you would cry. Everyday controlling how you ate was more of a task then it had ever been before. The small blade you had to defend your self now became the thing of your self destruction hardly ever leaving your hand and in those hands left a trail of blood and shame in its wake. In the sanguine pools around your limbs your life drained from you. It hurt so bad but good at the same time. The pain of your skin being split open by a sharp blade hurt for a short while but there was also and inexplicable relief in this pain. Though in the end your end will not come. Only a new mark will stay on your tapestry of sorrow that was your skin. This tapestry had become your life recently. The constant waves of agony that washed through you were only soothed this way. You try to convince yourself that Sett could never have loved this. This was all for the best, all for your dear love, Sett. It had to be.

Unknown to you Sett was getting rather fed up with all this running away and avoiding him. He loves you dammit and he knows you love him too! So why the hell were you being so distant lately? He was grumbling to himself and putting everyone in the pit on edge. Bookie and fighter a like knew what happens when you test the Boss when he’s in a bad mood. Nothing good they’ll tell you what. While everyone was generally avoiding Sett while he was irritated one particular fighter saw this as a chance. You were gone, you had to be to put him in this kind of mood. Time to test the waters. They made their way over to the beast man, who paid them no mind in the slightest. They frowned then coughed loud enough for the boss’s ears to twitch. Sett quickly and aggressively rounded on them and growled.

“What do you want? Can’t you see I’m not in the mood right now? Buzz off!” They were taken a little aback by his sheer aggressiveness. Now they knew he’d be a little upset but to be this upset over a broken thing like you was a bit ridiculous. It almost seems that he actually liked you but that couldn’t be it because no one in their right mind could like you. Well if he was going to be rude then they could be rude right back.

“No need to be so rude Boss. Im sorry if your little fling flaked out on you but they were certainly nothing to be upset about losing.” Before they could say anything else Sett moved with such speed they had no time to react. Their head hit the wall so hard the world started to blur and spin. Sett was snarling as he lifted up this dead weight bastard by the throat and slammed his head against the wall again. No one talked about you like that in front of him NO ONE.

“And just what the hell would you know about them?!” They yelped in pain as Sett punched them hard in the gut hard enough for some blood to dribble out of their mouth. A dark grin appeared on their blood stained face making Sett glare and tighten his grip on their throat. Ah, they had truly underestimated how much he didn’t know about you. It was likely Sett wouldn’t let them live but at least they could go out knowing Sett’s love would waver when he hears the truth about you and maybe just maybe you had already left this world and they could rub it in your face in the afterlife.

“More then you apparently. Little flake was broken anyway. It would be so much better for you if you just let the little defect go. I mean a guy like you shouldn’t have to deal with a creature that can’t decide if they want to eat a lot or nothing then just throw it all up or just spit up acid. Then on top of that have to deal with their “accidents” that they give themselves because they can’t handle their own mind. Honestly a waste of life that no one should put up with. You should just let them go. That is if they haven’t left this world already.” Sett blinks as he takes in all that information. You had eating problems? You HURT yourself? You want to avoid him so you could break yourself more because you were afraid of he would leave you? None of that set well with the beast man. You didn’t need to hide that from him. He loved you so much and if you had problems he’d want to be there for you. He NEEDED to be there for you, but first he needed to take out the trash. With a deep growl Sett channeled some of his Vastayan power into his arm and quickly crushed their throat. Blood sputtered out of their mouth for a moment before they fell completely limp. Sett dropped them like a sack of potatoes and turned to face some of the other fighters who silently watched the scene unfold and nodded for them to get rid of the body. Two of them moved quickly to dispose of the corpse and the others stood there in fear of their boss.

“Alright fellas I’m gonna head out for a bit. I’ll be back later with my babe and if anyone has any crap to say to them you’ll end up like that horrible bastard thats being taken out the door, got it?” Everyone in the room collectively agrees and Sett promptly leaves the terrified room behind. He needed to get to you now. If anything that A-hole said was true then you were probably not ok and if you weren’t ok he wasn’t ok. He kept you in mind as he started to run as fast as he could towards your home, hopefully he wasn’t too late.

In your seemingly dark and cold abode you sat on the floor in front of you bed. Sullen, in pain, and defeated there seemed to be no end to this sadness today. The only thoughts that ran through your mind were of your imperfections and your love who needed to be free from the blemishes of your life. You held the blade in your hand precariously. You were so used to the blade grazing the skin as of late that it didn’t bring anymore of that reliving pain. Perhaps you needed to go deeper. Yes, you needed to go deeper the pain was deeper so you just have to push it in closer to the core of your misery. You looked at the thing that had become a part of you arm its sharpness could go in so far it could be so easy for it to just pierce the core of your being. If it did everything would end. All the pain, the doubt, the indecision, gone. Thats what you want. Everything to be gone. You bring your end closer to you and in the process catch the sight of your arms tattered in red lines and blood splatter of today. Sett would be so sad to see that. He never liked to see you in pain, always wanting to fight away all your problems, such a sweetheart. A small smile actually appeared on your face as you recalled the memory of the day Sett told you he’d kick the ever-loving ass out of anyone that would even try hurt you. Such nice thoughts. Hopefully Sett’s next love will appreciate such protectiveness. The sliver of a smile you had fades and the knife in your hand and the wounds on your arms become more real. The pain rolling back into your chest double time after the happy memory. No he didn’t need this. You were a horrible mess that needed to be disposed of and you had the way to be disposed of in your hand. You feel nauseated as your mind races. Everything hurts. Everything hurts please make it stop! You gasp and begin to cry. You didn’t want to die, you wanted to live happily with Sett, but that could never be. You didn’t want to be that much of a burden to him. This is how it has to be. You hesitantly bring the blade up to your chest and start to hyperventilate. No, yes, no, yes, don’t do it you deserve to be happy with someone that loves you and he’s out there waiting for you. Lies, he probably doesn’t even notice your gone just end it and lets be free from all this pain. Your so lost in thought you don’t hear the pounding on the door or the sound of it breaking.

“Babe? Babe?!” The loud, sudden yelling in the room draws you from your thoughts and a blur rushes to you and wrenches the knife from your hand and throws it across the room. Your in shock as two large, warm, strong arms wrap themselves around you and pulls you in to the large man their attached to. You look up and see red fluffy hair and a dark purple fluffy vest collar in your face. Sett, he came for you. Tears bubble up and begin to rain down on Sett’s shoulder. He coos you softly and sits down fully on the floor and pulls you into his lap. His head presses softly against yours and he begins to kiss your tears away. A calloused hand cups the side of your face and makes you look up at him. He looks so concerned and slightly frightened. He was scared of losing you and you almost let your life slip away. So stupid, your so stupid, he really did need someone better.

“No I don’t! The only person I need is you. I was so worried about you. You started avoiding me and I didn’t know why. I was so confused, I didn’t understand what was happening. I still don’t to be completely honest but I want to know. I want to understand so you don’t have to feel like you have to do this. So you don’t have to hide from me and almost leave me.” His voice trembled at the end. You look upon his face and see his eyes shimmering like tears that wanted to fall but didn’t. He missed you so much and it felt so nice to have you in his arms, a little beat up but alive.

“But there’s so much wrong with me. You don’t have to deal with it, you shouldn’t have to. You don’t have to deal with me not being able to control my eating habits or this.” You gesture to the scars on your arms and your tear stained face.

“I’m a mess. A horrible mistake upon you and the world.” You were silenced by a deep loving kiss that held you both quiet until neither of you could breathe. The kiss ended with both of you gasping for air but Sett recovered faster and filled the quiet with his voice.

“Don’t be saying that crap. I know you feel bad, but your definitely not those things. I was told the same thing growing up. That I was a horrible mistake and nothing but a pain in the ass for my mama. She didn’t care about that though and whenever I felt bad she’d tell me that as long as one person in the world was happy with you then your life is worth living. I’m that one person. I love you so much and I don’t care if it takes me my whole life to understand or maybe I’ll never understand but the point is, I’m here for you and as long as I’m here for you, you don’t need to feel alone or ashamed. We can take all the time you need babe. I’ll be right here.” Your eyes filled with tears once again not from sadness but with joy. He truly loved you so much and was so patient with you. Perhaps, this can work. It would take a lot of time but maybe you could get better. As long as Sett was by your side it felt like you could just make it through and see some light at the end of your previously dark tunnel. You smile at him happily and cuddle into him. He lets out a small laugh.

“See, it’ll be ok, hun. Now lets get you cleaned up a bit your starting to look tougher then me!” He chuckled and kissed the scars on your arms as he picks you up easily. You can feel a better mood creeping in and jest with him.

“I am tougher then you.” He smiles and starts to kiss at your neck making you giggle and you swat at him playfully.

“Hmm, you might be right there, babe. You might have to protect me every now and then.” You nod and he snuggles into your nape. The light is even brighter now and for the first time in a long time you feel something you haven’t felt in a long time, Hope.

[sunflowersunshinevol6]

Adore You [H.S]

Summary: Harry meets Lily in the summer of 1965, after graduating Uni he flies to the states to work as a photographer. It's at one of his boss's house parties that they meet and sparks fly.

But when Harry is asked to go to Viatnam and photograph the horrors happening there, will the distance tear them apart? And what about the darkness surrounding him when he returns? Will she be able to heal him.

And she...she's not the same either.

Taking in the beauty of the sixties, this is a love story that spans years and culminates in one final admission. Harry will always adore her.

Chapter One:

"And we drink our coffee and pretend not to look at each other." Charles Baudelaire

The party was in full swing when Lily arrived, nervously walking up the path to her old friend's home. People lingered outside as music thumped from inside. It reminded her very much of the parties they attended at Berkely only three years ago. It was amazing how time could fly and people could change.

"Lily!" The first person she sees is dear old Louis Tomlinson. The two of them had dated in college, albeit briefly, but that hadn't gotten in the way of their friendship. Lily rushed into his open arms, laughing as her friend embraced her warmly. "Let me get a good look at ya love," she smiled, not realizing how much she had actually missed his accent. He had come from overseas. England to be exact, a town called Doncaster. She loved his heavy accent.

He took in her outfit. Lily wore a creamed colored skirt and white blouse tucked into it. She wore a pair of black ballet flats and had a few gold bracelets on her wrists, not one for jewelry, she decided to skip the rings and a necklace, fearing if she got to drunk she may actually lose them.

"You look lovely as eva," he praised, causing her to blush slightly.

"I could say the same about you," she complimented back, almost shouting in his ear. Louis wore a white button down shirt and grey slacks. He would look good in a paper bag. Lily thought jealously. He was always so effortlessly cool looking. "Have you seen Marie around? She invited me and I never got the chance to thank her." Louis shrugged, bringing his beer to his lips.

"Not since the party started actually. She's been a proper host." The music changes, The Beatles 'Love Me Do' begins to play. "Fancy a dance love?" Louis shouted over the music. Lily nodded, taking her friend's hand as he set down his beer.

They made their way through the crowded living room, Louis pulling her in front of him as they begin to dance. Louis was never good at it, jerking and playfully teasing Lily with his moves. She couldn't help but laugh out loud at just how silly she was.

"I never realized how much I missed you." She said as he pulled her close after spinning her out. She can feel him grin against the top of her head.

"Missed you too, Love." The sound of a motorcycle pulling up outside stops their conversation. Heads turn towards the door as the music dies down and people look to see who's got the bike.

With the front doors of Marie's house open, Lily can just see a glint of black metal under the street lights outside her home. A shadowy figure getting off the bike and walking up the path towards the house. People begin to disperse, the momentary curiosity lapsing as they go back to their conversations and alcohol. But Lily looks on, curious.

"I thought she said she didn't invite him." She heard Louis say behind her. His voice slightly strained.

"I'm sorry, who?" She asks. She watches Louis swallow hard before explaining.

"His name is Harry. He's a photographer, it's rumored he does a lot of boudoir and naughty pictures, no one knows for sure. He's sort of a bad boy mystery." Lily watched as the man took off his helmet, shaking out thick curly locks that she instinctively wanted to run her fingers through.

"Oh." She said nearly breathless. He looks up, hooking his helmet under his arm. Lily feels her heart skips a beat when he locked eyes with her. His eyes were green, so light and pretty, she had to look away before she got lost in them. "I better go find Marie. She is the reason I came tonight." Lily said, clearing her throat.

"Right." Louis said, reaching out to hug her. He could see Harry was watching them, a blank expression on his face as Louis pulled away. "I'll talk to you soon...and Lily," he reached for her hand before she walked away. "Stay away from 'im please. I don't know what I'd do if you eva got hurt." Lily gave him a sweet smile before walking off to find Marie.

Harry didn't usually come to these things. He perfered to keep to himself, stay at home and catch up on some reading or work on some pictures he'd taken. But Marie was his boss and she'd been nothing but kind to him since he started working for her. It was almost a dream really, right out of Uni he had gotten the call. Someone in the States had seen his portfolio and really admired his work. It had all gone from there. So if anything he was grateful for the opportunity she had given him.

Everyone had stared at him when he pulled up on his bike. It was still a work in progress, but he hadn't thought it looked that shitty. He avoided the stares and questioning looks as he entered the party, hoping to only say hello to Marie and then leave.

It was when he had taken off his helmet and felt someone staring at him that he saw her.

She stood in the corner of the living room, right by the record player, eyes locking with his intensely. Her dark hair fell down around her shoulders in simple, loose curls, brown eyes gazing at him with curiosity. She looked away too soon.

Lily never ended up finding Marie. She pushed her way through the crowded house and out into the fresh night air. There were a few couples scattered about here and there but everyone was mostly inside, the party was kicking up a notch and that was her cue to head home.

She thought about the man. Harry, as she kicked pebbles with her shoes, arms crossed against her chest as the cool breeze swept through her hair. She should have brought a jacket maybe. But it had been warmer earlier so she hadn't thought to. It was close to midnight and she could feel exhaustion seeping into her bones as she walked the three blocks to her apartment.

The rumble of a motorcycle behind her startled her, causing her to cry out and nearly stumble. She turned to see the head light of the bikes nearly blinding her as it came to a stop beside her.

"Hey," the driver pulled his helmet off and she felt her heart jump into her stomach. It was him. "Need a ride?" He asked. Lily opened her mouth to reply but thought about Louis's warning.

"No thanks. My apartment is close."

"It's a little late to be walking home alone don't you think?"

"I'm a big girl, I can take care of myself." Harry grinned, she was quick. He shut off his motorcycle, climbing off of it and steering it towards the curb. He let up the kick stand and walked back over to Lily, shimmying out of his jacket.

"Here," he offered, holding out his coat. Lily was taken aback by his demeanor. He spoke to her so easily, as if they were friends and hadn't just met. "I noticed your arms. A bit nippy out tonight yeah?" Wordlessly Lily takes the leather jacket, it's heavy, but warm from his body heat as she wraps it around herself.

"Thank you." She managed.

"No problem....please. Let me walk you home. I can't leave without knowin' ya made it. Would weigh heavy on my conscience." Lily laughed softly at his words, he seemed so formal, almost stiff.

"I suppose. As long as you don't plan on stalking me." He smirked, coming to walk beside her.

"Course not. My mum raised a gentleman."

"How did you find me anyway?" She asked. He shrugged, shoving his hands into the pockets of his Jean's.

"Was goin' home myself an saw you. Couldn't jus let you go off alone." She nodded.

They walked in silence for a bit, Lily didn't know what to say really. She was surprised and impressed by his kindness. But Harry's growling stomach ended up speaking for both of them.

"Sorry." He said shyly, patting his belly. "Haven' are in a while."

"There's a diner around the corner from my place....if you wanted to stop and grab something really quick?"

"You sure that's alright?" He asked her.

"Sure. I'll buy, pay you back for your chivalry." He chuckled, shaking his head.

"No need to do that love."

Frankie's was a 24 hour dinner. Lily came there many a night during college to cram for exams and drink enough black coffee to kill her. It was her place, but it felt a little weird bringing Harry there. She only just met him.

"Hey Martha." Lily said as they slid into a booth by the window. The older woman had walked over almost immediately, throwing Lily a kind smile.

"Who's this handsome young man you've brought with you?" Martha winked at Harry. He smiled, unable to contain his laughter.

"'m Harry. Nice to meet you." He held out his hand.

"My what a gentleman." Martha said, dramatically crossing her hand over her heart before shaking his. "What can I get you kids?"

"I'll have a chocolate milkshake and a burger, everything on it." Harry raised his eyebrows slightly. Lily was a little girl, he hadn't expected that.

"And you?" Martha asked.

"I'll have wha' she's havin' sounds good." Martha scribbled the order down before walking away. Lily cleared her throat, brushing a loose strand of hair behind her ear.

"So your accent? You're british?" Harry nodded.

"Proudly."

"What brought you to the states?"

"I always wanted to be a professional photographer. Went to Uni for it. When I was getting ready to graduate we had to set up our portfolios. Marie saw mine and liked it. Offered me a job almost a week after I graduated. So I took the time to get the paper work done and now I'm here on a work visa." Martha brought out the milkshakes. Lily took a long sip of hers, savoring the chocolate taste on her tongue.

"So that's how you know Marie."

"How do you know her?"

"We were roomies in college. We went to Berkely together. She was into all the marketing and stuff. I went for Women's studies and Philosophy."

"I'm impressed."

"Don't be. It's not that great."

They chattered a bit more before their food came. Lily learned that Harry had one older sister and two older step siblings. The way he spoke about his mother and his sister, you'd have thought they hung the moon and threw the stars into the sky. Lily found herself listening closely, palm on her chin as she focused on his words and the calm slow cadence of his voice.

"Tha' was delicious." Harry said, licking his fingers. Lily laughed dipping the last fry into ketchup. She started to fish out her wallet, only for Harry to hold up his hand.

"I said I got it Harry."

"At least let me split it."

"Fine." They split the bill and each leave a little tip, waving good bye to Martha as they left the diner, it was later now, nearly two in the morning and Lily could feel the exhaustion catching up to her.

"How much further from your flat are we?" Harry asked. He reached out, taking her hand in his as she led him down the street towards her apartment.

"Right here," she said, turning towards a painted white door, surrounded by a wrought iron fence and bricks. Harry walked her up to the door, taking his jacket back as she shrugged it off her shoulders.

"I'm glad you decided to walk me home." She acknowledged, a small and sleepy smile on her face.

"I'm glad you let me." They stared at each other for a moment more, electricity vibrating between them as they locked eyes. Harry swallowed hard, leaning forward to kiss her cheek.

"G'night Miss. Lily."

[ambered-glazed-sheep]

Please do go on about Doomslayer and his morals. I'm legit fascinated by him since starting the let's play I'm watching and I'd love to hear your take on him (I know literally nothing about the Doom franchise other than lots of blood and violence against demons and also badass music)

You know, a year ago when my friends asked me 'hey do you wanna play minecraft' and i said 'yeah sure' i would have never thought i would one day have a minecraft sideblog where i get questions about the personality of the main character of a shooter fps game (of all things!) that is known for its incredible violence.

But here you go:

(prepare yourself this has gotten way longer than i thought oh god, and also it has nothing to do with hermits whatsoever. warnings for language and descriptions of violence? and i assume the readmore won’t be working the way i want it to)

Ok so, Doom!

First of all, i know nothing about the old games, and i’ve only seen a minimal amount of Doom Eternal Letsplays. Most of this is based on Doom (2016). 

Ok so we all start out thinking Doomguy! It’s the guy you play in Doom. The hand that hold the gun YOU are shooting demons with. And sure, you can go trough the whole game with that mindset, but that’s boring and we are overthinking fictional characters in this house.

ID software actually managed to give Doomguy/Doomslayer a TON of personality despite him never saying a word, barely any cutscenes to show what he does when you don’t control him (at least in Doom 2016), and not a lot of other characters to interact with despite enemy monsters.

The game just leaves you little hints and snippets and that’s what makes Doomslayer so exciting to think about. Just the right levels between ‘cryptid half-god who never shows emotion and is a player-insert’ and ‘this dude’s got an AGENDA. he has PLACES TO BE’. You are him as you play, but sometimes he makes decisions on his own. But personally, i could never find myself to disagree.

First, you got the intro sequence. 

You got a unknown voice telling you: 

“They are rage. Brutal, without mercy. But you. You will be worse. Rip and Tear, until it is done.”

First of all, YO. WOW. HOLY SHIT.

The scene immediately shifts to Doomslayer waking up. He’s naked, he’s chained down somewhere, theresa SHIT TON of scars littering his arms and hands. First thing HE does, on his own behalf, is ripping off the chains by flexing a little (literal iron chains!!!), smashing a zombies head against the sarcophagus he lays in and completely obliterating said head into a bit of blood (mind you, three seconds after he woke up from a thousands of years long coma!! but we only learn that later), and then promptly gets up, picks up a pistol, and now it’s your, the players turn. This takes like 8 seconds in total. This man means BUSINESS. That’s the first thing we learn.

Second thing that strikes me is the interactions with Samuel Hayden. 

Doomslayer is patient when a computer voice tells him the status of the base. He is patient as he looks at the screens to see what is going on. (a demonic invasion, thats what). But then dear Dr. Samuel Hayden calls. 

Dr. Hayden says “Hi, i’m the boss here, i’m sure we can work together in a way that benefits us both uwu”. Doomslayer immediately grabs the PC screen and pushes it aside. His gesture says, i’m done with this. im sick of this dude. this guy is full of shit. And he’s right! And that after barely hearing two sentences from Hayden!

So the second thing we learn is that he has no time for people trying to exploit him. He hears Hayden, he has a gut feeling that this dude is a little fishy, maybe he just plain doesnt like higher ups and heads of facilities. But we learn that he IS. NOT. going to listen to this man, and his body language makes that very clear without being actually violent against the person (he doesnt destroy the Screen either! just pushes it aside very annoyed. He isn’t mindlessly destroying property here.)

This continues. 

Hayden goes ‘hey maybe don’t destroy that energy source!’ in the few seconds you dont control him, Doomslayer listens. He hesitates. He considers. Then he destroys the thing anyways. Hayden keeps telling him to stop, but Doomslayer doesnt listen. He’s got his own mind!

This was mostly about Haydens Company, the UAC, harvesting hell energy, and hurting people in the process. 

There’s a scene where Doomslayer rides an elevator. Hayden, over the comms, tells him that everyone that has died in the demon attack was a nacessary sacrifice that will bring a new future or some shit like that. the camera pans down to show some poor sods corpse at those very words. Doomslayer cracks his knuckles. he is NOT HAPPY about that, so we know he doesnt like it when human lifes are sacrificed. He destroys the communicator, so he doesnt have to listen to Haydens voice telling him lies and trying to sway him anymore. 

(then he takes out his shotgun, the doors open, metal starts playing and the doom logo is shown, but that’s more about making the player feel epic than showing doomslayers personality,,)

Now i would like to talk about VEGA, the AI that controls the mars facility. 

VEGA occasionally talks to us/the Slayer. He is very straightforward, tells us what to do and why to do it, and is generally very polite. In the story, Doomslayer listens to Vega. 

Now why does he listen to VEGA but not Hayden? 

I think it’s because Hayden tries to get him to do things that just benefit him, and Hayden is very manipulative in his words (or tries to be lol), while Vega just says (if you destroy this thing, that door will open. I think Doomslayer appreciates it when people are honest to him.

And in the end, Doomslayer on his own decides to save a backup of VEGA. VEGA didn’t ask him to, Doomslayer did that on his own. It’s not relevant to his mission, he doesnt need VEGA to go to hell to close portals and whatnot. But he does save him. Why? I think it’s because he cares. Because he’s come to like VEGA. Because Vega didn’t try to manipulate him and screw him over. 

Next up is the Slayers Testament. 

These are a bunch of writings/recordings that you find scattered in the hell levels. (i highly recommend listening to them/reading them, they are metal as fuck and give me such an immense feeling of power bc they are talking about me, the doomslayer)

These testaments were written by demons. They were genuinely afraid of the slayer. 

Quote:

Unbreakable, incorruptible, unyielding, the Doom Slayer sought to end the dominion of the dark realm.

As said, i don’t think these are purely talking about his physical strength. They are talking about his... well, mentality. His Codex. They see him as an unstoppable force. He is incorruptible. Let that sink in. Man walks trough hordes of demons and at no point ever thinks ‘yeah maybe this is a bit much’ or ‘they just keep coming this is pointless’. No. He’s unyielding. (Can you tell how much i love the words in these testaments? It’s just got such a nice ring to it.)

In battle, the Doomslayer is BRUTAL. He tears apart demons, rips their eyes out, all that. He stomps on heads like they’re water balloons and isn’t fazed at all. Nothing stops this man. (except players like me who fall off the map 5 consecutive times, but lets just imagine the doomslayer is actually like he would be if someone played the game perfectly. player skill shouldn’t be considered in my headcanons jahdjhgd) One could even argue he has fun at this, because there are some animations like ripping off a zombies arm and beating the Zombie with it, or feeding a demon it’s own heart.

I feel like that says a lot about his personality as well!

He doesn’t hesitate. He doesn’t doubt himself. He doesn’t question his cause! He fights to get rid of the demons, not just the ones in his way, but every. demon. He will go out of his way to kill more demons. You could either take this as him having fun, or him following his own moral codex to get rid of every demon, or him being a not-quite-human war machine, or wanting to protect humanity from them. 

I would say it’s a healthy mix of all that :D

In older games, there was this whole backstory snippet of him returning to earth, finding that the demons had invaded his planet but also killed his pet rabbit (Daisy), and he then goes onto a 2-game long revenge trip.Take that as you will.

The last thing i would like to mention is this post.

Please watch the video. Doomguy walks trough the rows of random human guards. This is the walk of a man who doesn’t owe them SHIT. Yes, he wants to save humanity. Yes, he cares. But he also knows who he is. He knows what he did, and what he will do. He doesn’t have to justify himself in front of these shady scientists and jerky guards.THEY owe HIM, in fact. This video emits the sheer CONFIDENCE of someone who has walked trough hell multiple times and knows none of these people could even touch him. Yes, he would never kill them. He would not harm humans. But he doesn’t care about making them uncomfortable with his presence, either. He doesnt ask for permission.

(i think by now i am using the exact same words they did in that post. really, its worth the read. i think there’s a lot of repeated things between this post and that post by now but i encourage you to watch that video. its worth it.)

Also, the impact he has on the people in this room! they trip. they walk backwards. they go quiet, stutter. they are intimidated. They know he’s technically here to help and save them, but now, standing in front of them.... just wow. it really puts things into perspective. it tells the player that all the demons that he’s killed, all that the doomslayer has done... its noted. it has an impact. 

I’m not really sure where i’m going with this anymore, but watching those NPCs react to the slayers presence just adds so much more to his character. it tells us how people see him, and boy.... do they see him. 

i think it also ties a lot into how the player is made feel, controlling doomguy. all these head stomping and limp tearing animations, the guns, people being scared, watching doomslayer destroy important equipment from first pirson or pushing open doors or whatever... it just gives me such an immense feeling of power! i can’t even describe it. (...it also has nothing to do anymore with the original question but holy shit did i love playing doom for the sheer atmosphere of it. despite me being horrible at playing.)

(at the end of this i’m realizing that all of this never addressed if doomslayer is happy and content murdering demons, or if he just wants his peace and quiet but can’t help himself every time he sees a demon. i would propose to leave that up to headcanons. mine is a mix of both but in a way that makes it not angsty. like he loves to have his calm moments, but is just as happy to rip some demon’s spine out. probably gets a little itchy and impatient if he hasn’t fought in a while.)

also if you’re interested in game design and way more professional people talking about why doom 2016 is great i reccomend this documentary

...anyways it’s past 1am and this has gotten way out of hand but

tl;dr: the doomslayer is metal as fuck, he has a lot of agenda he is following, and i love him so much

[orange-waterfalls]

I'm Havin' Feelings Fer Ye

Captain Magnum x gender neutral!reader

@lovefor-xreaders ty for the prompt!

A/N: Guess who has no life and wrote an entire 2,000 word fanfic all in one day? THIS ASSHOLE! im so fucking bored guys, please, this is all I have. Send prompts. Uh... Rated T for cursing and violence. I think mostly angst, fluff at the end.

Word Count: 2.3k

--

You danced around the ship with some of the other crewmates to shanties the captain sang. You found treasure! You actually found treasure! You had honestly expected to die at some point… but you didn't! And you found treasure! That was wonderful! You were starting to think the heist wasn't such a bad idea! Even though Mark's… gone… you'd be alright! You had treasure! You'd be alright…

Captain Magnum watched you as you danced around, a smile present on your face. It made him feel all weird inside… he'd lived long enough to know what love feels like… probably. This was not it… he didn't think… he honestly didn't know. But when he watched you spin and kick your feet and laugh… he felt real happy…

You danced for a while before you eventually got tired and sat down, panting. The captain and the crew were messing with the treasure. Picking it up and letting it fall back into the chest, examining it, biting it…

These people were weird…

You held out your hands for your share of the treasure, since you were being patient. He looked to you and set a small coin in your hand, curling your fingers and patting them. You squinted at him, wondering if he's actually serious. He seemed to be, since he headed to his quarters immediately after. You frowned, looking at the coin. You'd talk to him about that later…

Captain Magnum felt a bit bad about only giving you a coin. What else was he supposed to do? You might've left if he gave you more treasure! He couldn't have that! Then again… that seemed a bit manipulative… eh, you'd be fine. He sat down in his chair and thought about you.

You were an enigma to him.

He'd felt this way before… but it was so… prominent this time… why was he so fond of you? It's not like you were special! You just had beautiful skin and sparkly eyes and the most stunning smile he'd ever seen and...

Goddamnit, he was in love…

He sighed, wondering what he was going to do about this, when he heard a sharp knock at his door. He jumped a bit, not expecting anybody since it was pretty late. He stood up and walked over, opening the door. You were standing there with your arms crossed. He was going to greet you, but you looked pissed. He wondered why. Then, you held up the coin.

"Are you kidding?" You asked accusingly. "I'm your first mate, you trust me enough to choose where we go, and you give me this bullshit?" You started walking towards him. Despite the height difference, he felt a bit intimidated by you. He stepped back.

"Listen, I be th' cap'n. I already told ye, me share be more fair than others," he stated. You glared at him and he felt his stomach drop. "Ye knew wha' ye were gettin' into, ye can nah be angry," he crossed his arms. You sighed.

"Fine. Whatever," you mumbled as you left the cabin. He opened his mouth to apologize, but nothing came out. He closed his mouth again. You were already gone anyway. Nothing he could do about it now. He'd get some sleep and you'd be fine in the morning.

--

It had been a few days since you found the treasure. You weren't talking to Magnum. He kept glancing at you as you were swabbing the deck. Your smile was replaced with a frown. It was less of an angry frown and more of a sad frown, but it made him feel just as bad. He waited a while to talk to you because he didn't want to mess it up. He eventually decided that it was a good enough time to do so, and he walked over to you.

"Mornin', first mate! How did ye sleep?" He asked. You paused for a moment, but you didn't answer. "Uh... 'twas a bit windy last night, huh? Glad we got all th' loot inside..." you still didn't look up, but your frown got tighter. He patted his hands on his legs and sucked in a breath. "Wonderful weather we be havin'?" You finally stopped mopping and turn to him.

"What do you want?" You asked, exasperated. He frowned.

"Are ye okay? Ye seem upset…" he commented.

"Oh, no yeah I'm totally fine!" You scoffed. "My best friend's dead, the guy who killed him won't even bother giving me any sort of compensation, I may never see my family or friends again, but sure I'm fine." You stated, mopping vigorously. Magnum sighed and looked at your face. You looked like you were on the verge of tears. He opened and closed his mouth, trying to find the right words.

"I... I be sorry. I'll give ye more treasure if... If ye promise ye won't weigh anchor…" he finally managed. You stopped and turned to him slowly. His eyes widened. "No, no, no! Ye... I didn'... um…" he gulped as you raised an eyebrow at him.

"Uh-huh. Go on. I'm waiting." You demanded. He took a deep breath.

"I... I find ye endearin'... 'n I wants ye t' stay... wit' me... specifically." He said. Your face softened a bit, to his joy. He smiled.

"I… have people back home." You said. His smile fell. "I can't just… leave and… not tell them anything…"

"Then tell 'em! Write 'em a letter or somethin'! That would be fine!" He said desperately.

"What am I supposed to say? "Hey, guys! I eloped with a 7 foot tall pirate and am now sailing the seven seas as his first mate"?"

"...yes?" He said, unsure. You sighed and looked down. He held his breath, waiting for whatever you were going to say next.

"What am I supposed to tell his family?" You asked softly. He took a deep breath.

"I... I dunno. 'n... I be mighty, mighty sorry about wha' I did t' yer friend... But... I... I be... I reckon I be in love wit' ye…" he said shakily. You looked up at him, your eyes widened. You could see a tint of red on his suntanned cheeks. He avoided your eyes for a bit before you chuckled. He looked at you. You smiled at him warmly. He returned it.

"I…" you began, blushing. You were cut off by the sound of a cannon.

"Avast! Prepare to be boarded!" A voice boomed from above.

"Oh, God, not again," you whined. Magnum reached out to put a hand on your shoulder, but another cannonball whizzed past you two, making you fall in different directions.

"Ye hide. I'll take care o' this," he instructed. He unsheathed his sword as you hid behind a nearby barrel, watching him to see if he'd need any assistance.

"Who be thar? Show yourself, yellow-bellied cur!" He yelled. You blinked, processing what he said. "Yellow-bellied cur". Huh. That was new. You heard wood creaking behind you and ducked further behind the barrel. You slowly rose and saw a man standing in from of Magnum. He was taller than you and had an average build, and was wearing a pirate outfit. His clothes looked… cleaner and more fancy than Magnum's. He was holding a sword and had a peg leg.

"Who are ye callin' a yellow-bellied cur?" He said in a low, rough voice.

"Obviously you, shitlord!" You said, quickly covering your mouth with your hand afterwards. The man turned and looked at you. He raised an eyebrow, smirking. You suddenly felt… violated.

"Well, well, well. Wha' 'ave we here?" He chuckled. "I may jus' keep ye fer meself." You laid your hand on a revolver.

Magnum tightened his fist around the hilt of his sword and swung. The man blocked it and stumbled back.

"Ye lay a hand on them, ye're dead." He growled. The man smirked and tried to jab at his side. Magnum managed to block it in time. The two captains went on sword fighting for a couple minutes while you stayed behind the barrell. The other man's crew was on the ship fighting the rest of yours. You felt a bit useless, so you grabbed the revolver and aimed towards the other pirates. You grazed two in their legs, and nailed one in the shoulder. You lost track of Captain Magnum after a while. While you looked for him, you heard something land behind you. You yelped and spun around, seeing the invading captain.

"Ahoy thar, darlin'," he smirked at you. You held the revolver up to aim at him. He scoffed. "C'mon, darlin'. Thar's no needs fer that. I won't hurt ye… Much."

"Go fuck yourself," you snarled.

"Such naughty language fer such a sweet thin'." He laughed. "I'll 'ave fun wit' ye."

"Oh, yeah, that doesn't sound creepy at all. Great," You sighed. He took a step towards you and you cock the gun. "Don't move, asshole." You warned.

"Oh, come on now." He chuckled. "We both know ye're too soft t' shoot me. So, why don't ye-" You shoot. The bullet hits him in the side. His eyes widened as he stared at you in disbelief.

"Something about me, captain," you set the gun down and walked over to him as he fell to the floor. "My best friend is dead. I'm feeling a bit pissed. And I have shot a man before." You got on one knee and leaned down next to his ear. "I'm not as soft as I look." You stood back up and walked back to the middle of the deck.

Captain Magnum was frantically walking around. The crew looked okay, so you sighed. The captain heard and spun towards you. He smiled widely as he ran over and enveloped you in a hug.

"Oh, thank Poseidon. Ye're okay. If I had lost ye I... I... I dunno wha' I'd do!" He stammered, petting your head. "Ye're okay, right?" You smiled and hugged him back.

"I'm alright, Captain," You whispered. He sighed and held you for a while before the previous first mate cleared his throat.

"'tis real touchin' 'n all, but we should prolly repair th' ship." He suggested. Magnum turned to him, glaring.

"Ye interrupted a bondin' moment t' tell me that?" He glowered. You bit your lip to keep from laughing. The crewmate opened his mouth to respond, but almost immediately closed it and started picking up pieces of wood. The other crewmates followed suit.

"We should help them," you declared. Magnum looked at you, his eyebrows knitted together.

"But do we 'ave t'?" He asked hopefully. You smiled and pulled away from him. Despite wearing a couple layers, he could feel the absence of your warmth. He sighed and helped clean up.

--

It took a while, but you all managed to clean up the deck. You'd probably need to buy more wood to repair the boat, but you figured it'd be fine. It was dark now and everyone had retired to their quarters. Except for you. You sat on the deck, staring up at the stars. Magnum left his quarters to check on you. He got worried when he saw you weren't asleep. He walked over to you, ruining the mood a bit with how loud he was. He dropped next to you with a loud creak of the floor. You didn't look at him.

"Ahoy," he greeted.

"Hi," you responded bluntly. You both sat there for a moment while he came up with things to say.

"Are ye okay?"

"Yep."

"Okay. That be good." Silence. "Wha' are ye doin'?"

"Just… stargazing."

"Okay. Why?"

"Felt like it."

"Oh." More silence. "Are ye thinkin' about 'im?"

"Yes."

"Do ye want t' talk about 'im?"

"No. Not tonight. Maybe another time."

"Ok... 'tis a tad cold tonight."

"Yeah. I guess so."

"Me cabin be th' warmest... If ye... Wanted t' sleep in thar... Wit' me... That would be alright…" You whipped you head towards him surprised. He noticed your panic. "Or not! That be fine too! I understand. Sorry fer botherin'. Goodnight!" He started to stand up, but you took his hand. He looked at your interlocked hands, flushed, then back at you.

"That would… that'd be fine." You said shakily. "I just… want to stay out here a bit longer."

"Ok," He nodded and plopped back down. You retracted your hand and tucked your knees to your chest, looking back up. He continued to look at you for a second, smiling, before looking back up. You chuckled.

"He loved space…"

--

Captain Magnum could listen to you talk for hours. You start talking about stars, then about Mark, then you get to talking about your other friends and family. He listened to everything you said because he knew it was important to you. You started to yawn after 45 minutes and you leaned on his arm. He froze in place, not wanting to bother you. Eventually, he looked down at you to see if you were asleep. Once he confirmed you were, he effortlessly lifted you up and carried you to his cabin. He gently set you on the large, warm bed. He wasn't planning on getting on it with you. You weren't there yet. You hadn't even told him you loved him back. He couldn't in good conscience get into a bed with you. He sat in his chair and looked at you. You were so…

"Gorgeous," he said under his breath. You cracked an eye open.

"Right back at you," you slurred. He blushed. You held out your arms. "Come into bed," he blushed deeper.

"No, I don't reckon I should…" He tried to say. You whined and he just couldn't. He stood up and carefully climbed into the bed with you, making sure to keep a bit of space between you two. That was pointless because you immediately turned over and snuggled into his chest. He gently moved his arms to embrace you tightly. He set a small kiss to your head and just lied there, wanting to treasure this moment.

Your eyes closed again as you heard him say "I love you". You smiled.

"I love you, too."

If I didn't say it before SEND PROMPTS