#im stuck at bookmarking them and then start another

[gomzdrawfr]

When you have the idea so vividly in your head and you get to the canvas and you wondered why you even try

Anyways some royal au really shitty thumbnail scribble for Raven's backstory and fear of flowers (cw: blood, talks of death and corpse)

I dont blame you if you dont get it scdjhbscdbhjsdcjbhcsdhjbscdhbj

But the idea was young Raven who assisted Viktor in the work that stained her hands early on. In the Royal AU, Viktor is a known assassin that carried out his business in the basement of their home, where contracts were signed, secrets exchanged and bodies left to rot until they can disposed of. So with the air thick with the foul stench and metallic scent of blood, Viktor always sent Raven for a simple task.

Bring back flowers and herbs.

At first, she didn’t question it. Of course she didn't, she was young, and Viktor was all she knew. Viktor was her guardian, her mentor, the only constant in her life, the one that brought her back from the brink of death. So. she did as she was told. Every day, she gathered bundles of lavender, rosemary, thyme, and rose petals—herbs and flowers known for their strong fragrances, their use in purifying spaces, and their ability to hide the unpleasant scents. Sometimes she gather the flowers and put them in small pouches, sometimes she would have to boil them in a liquid that the maid never name.

When she was old enough, she knew what these flowers were for then. She arranged them carefully around the dimly lit cellar, the mingling scents pushing back against the stink of blood and rot.

What meant to be pretty flowers became something she feared against. The once sweet smelling lavender now becomes lost its colors and turned sickly, the roses stained with red.

Flower fields are nothing but a reminder, a show of guilt.

When it came time to dispose of the bodies, they traveled under the cover of night, the place of disposal was never the same, but the path back to the house was unmistakable.

The always had to cross a vast field of sunflowers. Towering, golden, and ever-facing the sun, they stood as if they were watching. To Raven, they were more than just flowers.

They were witnesses. Their wide, unblinking faces followed her as she walked among them, as if they knew.

Even though she had never taken a life, she knew she was just as guilty as Viktor.

He killed, she helped him bury the truth.

He painted the floor red, she covered it with petals.

But the sunflowers did not care for the differences, did they? In the end, she is one with Viktor, sharing the same pair of hands, the same weight of sins.

She could no longer look at flowers without seeing the bodies beneath them, without remembering how their fragrance never truly masked the stench of death. Sometimes, in the marketplace, the scent of fresh flowers twisted into something rancid, something rotten—as if the dead had never truly been buried, as if they were clawing their way back to whisper accusations in her ear, to blame her, to seek revenge—

Tainted. The flowers were tainted. Just like her.

[reineydraws]

Hey Reiney! i've been following your Renkaza comic for some time now and it's kind of gotten me into the ship. Would you happen to have any fic recs to get me started?

im so honoured my comic got u into the ship! (@sshcomic for those who don't know! 🫶) i love giving out fic recs omg thank u so much for asking!!!! i have 15 for ya haha.

i'll have specific recs under the cut, but first i wanna just say that anything by emilieee @e-milieeee ; dragonsandcryptids @lesbiansanemi ; and tippertupper are great places to start! they're amazing writers with a good body of work and i've definitely gone through a lot--if not all--of their renkaza stuff! please check them out!

word count is rounded to nearest thousand btw! :) smoke and mirrors + demon's choice are big inspirations for my comic, if ur coming from there!

i've also realized these can be pretty lengthy so if u want recs with shorter word counts just lmk and i'll comb through my bookmarks for <15k. but anyways!

Smoke and Mirrors by emilieee (272k)

canon happens in modern times au, where akaza ends up as kyo's apartment neighbour, tho kyo doesn't initially realize akaza's a demon. it's emotional! it's plotty! akaza mentions kokushibo made all the kizuki's fake id's and i still think that's hilarious! it's got one of my fave enemies to besties akaza & shinobu plots ever! please read this!!!

last sunrise by DragonsAndCryptids (182k)

akaza turns kyojuro by accident bc he bleeds too much into kyo's open wounds during the mugen train fight, and neither notice until it's too late. shinobu notices too and decides perhaps that this might be a prime research opportunity... uh-oh! the ethical quandries are good in this, and shinobu while flawed is very well-written. renkaza also end up with a soul bond. another emotional one but god is the journey amazing. tw for some torture scenes that could be graphic.

Small Fire of Winter Stars by phabulousphantom (66k)

modern au where akaza is a tattoo artist and kyo runs a teens program at the local community centre. it's one of my faves bc i just love stories about jaded people opening up and finding love and trust again, and this is exactly that. i also love the ensemble cast in it. the teenagers are adorable, especially inosuke who is a problem kid that finds something aspirational with akaza. thinking abt this fic is making me smile again!

Camp Kasugai by si1verbird77 (20k)

also modern au where renkaza are both counselors at a summer camp. kyo runs a percy jackson program, and he and akaza fall in love over the summer with the help of the deep trust that camp atmospheres usually end up fostering. kyo and sen, and akaza as well, also touch on the grief of losing parents, and the nature of camps as a place to grow into yourself and how time keeps moving. it's nice. i love this one a lot.

Inertia (series) by TipperTupper (23k)

akaza saves kyo from freezing to death, and kyo marvels at the compassion and humanity that akaza seems to hold in his muscle memory. ends up digging a little bit into akaza's trauma both as a human and as a demon controlled by muzan. sanemi gets a little mad about it in the third part and it's funny. overall vibe of the series is warm.

The Neverending Night by apodis (155k - incomplete)

when i say this fic rotates in my brain 24/7!!! akaza gets stuck in a time loop that resets every time kyo dies. it explores akaza's nature as someone who is willing to sacrifice everything for loved ones, and it's interesting bc at first kyo hates him, and then he starts to realize there's something wrong with akaza's memories bc of muzan, and he starts to really see how self-effacing akaza is. it's SO good, and the realizations both kyo and you as the reader have build and layer as the story progresses. akaza and kaname (kyo's crow) also build a friendship that is so important to me.

Demon's Choice by Celeste Gladnick (lairMorbidon) (69k - incomplete)

akaza defects early and joins tamayo, and so many more people are alive as a result. kyo in this one is interesting bc he's bigoted against demons thanks to his upbringing in a slayer family under abusive shinjuro, and refuses to see that akaza is anything other than dangerous, despite literally everyone else sticking up for him. extra fun bc he crushes on butterfly assistant hakuji without realizing that it's akaza in a human guise. akaza himself also has some deeply held trauma he doesnt quite realize he has.

what i wouldn't give by DragonsAndCryptids (59k)

senjuro becomes terminally ill and his end is fast-approaching. akaza, who's been bothering kyo on and off for two years since mugen train, hears about it and offers to help by turning sen into a demon. at first, kyo gives a hard no, but as his baby brother's illness progresses... well, anyone would get a little desperate, wouldn't they? love this bc one of my fave things abt renkaza is pushing kyo to his moral and ethical limit lol.

if you fly (say you won’t come back) by apodis (10k)

siren au! well, akaza's a siren, and kyo is the caretaker of a house that sees many different travelers. akaza's just the latest one. i love this one bc it's fantastical elements are wonderful, and it builds a very interesting world. as the reader, you have a lot of questions and it's an experience getting them answered. it's also prettily written. :)

Little Fighter Boy Comes Marching Home by VTheTrashKing (19k)

akaza gets de-aged by a demon's blood art, and kyo comes upon a little human boy with black hair and blue eyes, a chip on his shoulder and a very implicitly sad past, what with the criminal markings on his wrists and the way he insists he can take care of himself. another one of my fave renkaza things and kyo getting bowled over by hakuji's tragic story so i loved the way he puzzles it together in this one based on the little boy in front of him, and just finds one sad thing after another.

“Don’t die, Kyojuro” by Lenasaurous (24k)

akaza lets kyo live and often tells him not to die. kyo, who's life is often visited by death considering his occupation, begins to rely on akaza's immortality as a demon, and depend on his company as a constant--that is, until akaza passes out from not eating, and stays down for the count. uh-oh. (i also love this fic 'cuz there's this scene where akaza tries so hard to make kyo like him by giving him herbs and helpful plants, even tho kyo doesn't really want him around at that point, and it's so sweet and so sad. i wanna give him a hug!!!)

Memories behind broken glass by GammaRays (58k - incomplete)

this is the akaza whump fic of my dreams lol he gets captured and experimented on by shinobu (and it can be grisly so tw for that). kyo lured him into a trap to get him captured and ends up standing guard and starting to question his morals when it becomes clear that shinobu is being intentionally cruel. as the torture experiments go on, akaza also becomes so delirious that he begins to remember his human past. kyo loses it a little. it's good.

All the things a cup can hold by Liatheus (9k)

akaza takes shinjuro demon hunting lol. this is actually more of a shinjuro character study with side renkaza, but i love it specifically for a scene near the end where they all have tea, and ruka's empty place at the table feels obvious, and kyo and shinjuro are sort of crying about it. i also love that it explores the way shinjuro used to be a hashira, and how akaza investigates his strength in that sense. shinjuro's strength is an important aspect to kyojuro that doesn't often get delved into, and it makes sense to me that akaza sort of looks into it, as someone who loves kyo's strength.

Hello Again (the weight of memories welcome me home) by VTheTrashKing (15k)

this one's more artsy than anything but i love sci-fi as a genre so i'm reccing it lol i'm being self-indulgent. for whatever reason, throughout his life, akaza gets visited by various hashira. it's all very timey-wimey and the renkaza is more implied than anything, but there's this scene where akaza's being held trial at a hashira meeting, and then a future sanemi and future giyuu come out of nowhere to protect him and shock the living daylights out of their past selves, and it's so wild. i love it so much.

the milk incident by lattelesbean (4k)

this is just funny haha! short and fun read. modern soyama twins au where akaza's a café barista and accidentally puts his foot in his mouth in a very embarrassing way, bc he was too busy thirsting over kyo, his latest customer, to double-check what was about to come out of his mouth lol. i am still laughing.

[blkkizzat]

Hi!, same anon that asked for the line tut. I appreciate you making the tut and I’ve figured out how to put the colors and everything but I’m getting stuck on the moving part…

More specifically how to set the numbers to make everything move. I know you said 15 to 20 layers so I was trying to set the location by 2’s but I think I’m just confusing myself and making it harder than it needs to be. (I tend to do that lmao.💀)

Whenever you get some time, do you think you could make a quick video? I tend to learn by seeing and then repeating and I think my brain is getting confused with the unseen steps in between. 😭

There’s absolutely no rush, whenever you get the chance! Also if 🍓🍰 isn’t taken can I have it pls? 🥺Love and appreciate you sm!! 🫶🏾

Hey aweee welcome 🍓🍰 nonny ml! yeah people suck lol. tbh they are likely insecure that if other people knew how to do it then they wouldn't need them or use their resources anymore. which is silly because it shows you who is doing this for clout and who is doing this cause they have a genuine passion for it.

Anyway!

15-20 layers would be setting the location by 7, 6, or 5s.

Ah I totally get it tho however for some reason OBS crashes my photoshop when I enter the gradient tool cause i've tried to do another gradient tutorial with gradient text and it kept freezing photoshop.

however since you know after effects there's an easier way in the video timeline of photoshop (or in after effects timeline the principles would be the same). i just know people are more use to frame animation from all the tutorials on tumblr here. you can't go back and forth between the two timelines and i also don't know an eloquent way to explain keyframes other then they are like "bookmarks" so i'm assuming you know what they are/how to use them.

GRADIENT DIVIDERS USING VIDEO TIMELINE:

i started with a 1080 x 100 canvas that you can reduce the canvas size to whatever width you want your div to be later it would just be crazy doing this on a thin af canvas.

in the video timeline this is what you want. a color fill layer and then a single color gradient layer (in the middle of transparency, notice how the upper dopplers are white that means transparency) which you will then rasterize.

2. Now that your gradient layer is rasterized you can start animating it using keyframes. You will use the position keyframe.

notice how the playhead is at the beginning of the timeline and i have used to move tool to move the gradient layer so that only the smallest bit on the left is being seen, that's when you will add the first position keyframe. then you will move the playhead to the end of the clip (to the right) and move the gradient layer to the right as well add the final keyframe.

3. You're done! i was able to take the below with giphy capture tool but it only allows you to capture like a minute lol so i cant do the entire thing with it unfortunately.

*NOTE: im manually moving the playhead back and forth across the timeline thats why the movement speeds are off/choppy and its going in reverse. im just demonstrating how if you are doing it right you should be able to see it move across the timeline without even pressing play.

4. file > export > save for web legacy as gif. (clip the canvas down to the height you want first)

this is the end result (reduced to 2.00f and 3px height):

TIP: if you want to speed up the animation just shorten the length of the animation overall. so move the brackets down to the amount of seconds you want (you can see at the top of the timeline 1.00f, 2.00f, etc, right below that is container like brackets [ ] you move). then you will drag your layer to that new end point (both layers) and you can also click and drag the keyframe to the new endpoint too. its going to default to 5.00f automatically.

hope this helps! its a lot easier if you are comfortable using keyframes. you could even add multiple colors too and have them rotate out or follow right behind each other using key frames. each color would be on its own layer or you can do multi per layer just make sure to use transparency appropriately.

lmk if you have questions!

[jays-nook]

way back when tiktok wasnt banned here, i remember seeing multiple videos making fun of their ocs for being too much of a "mary sue" or just generally very silly. and ill admit, while i never really made fun of other peoples ocs, their presence was something i generally avoided while looking for fics-

it was only recently that my perspective changed and it was mostly cause i started creating my own and fell in love with the process.

i realized that it was all quite endearing actually when you think about it.

that we create these characters to feel closer to the source material (whatever it may be) we've become attached to. these ocs forge connections with the characters we love and we watch as their relationships unfold. we throw them into the world we loved and get to experience it from an insiders view.

we create possibilities to delve into hidden details that the creator left unaddressed and unexplored. we search for the "what ifs" and place our characters as agents of change to see what wpuld happen. we play with different possibilities and things we wish would have happened in the course of the events and use these ocs to make decisions that may often seem ooc for the existing characters.

and most of all, i realized how with every oc i create, im placing different parts of myself within them. whether its their personality, the way they talk, their interactions with others, their values and beliefs...etc. each oc represents some part of me or my experiences, and while theyre often exaggerated for the sake of drama and the fun of it, they quickly become something personal that i hold dear.

i dont have the same attachment to these ocs that others do, i go weeks without thinking of them, wips left unfinished, loose threads in their stories..but their presence, no matter how distant it sometimes is, is somewhat of a comfort - another means of escape when reality is too much.

and in the same way, i found others who practically ignited that interest in ocs within me and have become a source of inspiration. i found myself enthralled with all the different characters im being introduced to, their stories, their personalities, and even all the art that i was seeing by these amazing creators. i was overwhelmed by the sheer passion of my friends and threw myself in with them to share this experience (even though im sure theyre just a *little* tired of my forgetful self for having to repeat the same details more than once JFKFKD)

in each new fandom i join, ocs are a constant, and the creativity of all the creators is something im glad to experience again and again.

so yes, this was quite the ramble, but its just one long way of saying how i love being part of this special thing we all share as fans. i love adding art and videos to my "saved/bookmark" folders and going back to them to marvel at the love the creators have for these ocs. i love learning a little more about the creator through their characters, especially when the creator themself explores that aspect.

if you stuck around for this ramble have a vitrual cookie for your troubles 🍪

[armysantiny]

16:15 -  창균 (Changkyun)

P: Changkyun (IM) x gender neutral reader - Monsta X | G: fluff, timestamp| Inc: period comfort, implied afab reader bc of period, takeout, cramps, back rubs, changkyun having a nap | Wc: 332 | W: food, period/blood | R: PG

An: I need this rn

Head lolled backwards as they scrunched their face in pain, y/n groaned in pain as another onslaught of cramps started, the twisting agony in their abdomen impossible to ignore. Bookmarking, closing and putting their book to the side, y/n brought their knees to their chest, breathing through what was going to be another 6 days of cramps. Stuck on the living room sofa, the brunet could only hear what presumably was the sounds of Changkyun stirring from his nap in their bedroom.

Yawning the remnants of sleep away as he poked his head into the living room, Changkyun sighed at the sight of y/n huddled on the sofa. Walking over and taking a seat beside them, he pressed a gentle kiss to their forehead before rubbing their back. Chuckling when y/n’s boba-eyed expression met his own, the 25-year-old slowly lowered y/n’s legs and reached over for the folded blanket.

“Hey there precious, are the cramps getting really bad?” Leaning their head on his shoulder, y/n nodded, eyebrows furrowed together.

“Mhm…Kyun-ah, am I dying?” Y/n asked, eliciting a ‘not-amused-but-that-was-funny’ smile from their boyfriend. “…it does feel like it though.”

“I don’t doubt you baby; let me get you some paracetamol, and I’ll call takeout, hmm?” Changkyun offered, one which was gladly accepted as y/n clenched their fists in pain. Getting up and returning to the sofa with two paracetamol tablets and a bottle of water, Changkyun let y/n wash the painkillers while he ordered food.

Gently running his hand through y/n’s hair while they slept, Changkyun’s attention was drawn to the door once their delivery had arrived. Lifting y/n’s head up and replacing the space where his lap was with a cushion, Changkyun made his way to the door, opening it and taking the takeout bag from the delivery driver. Bringing the food to the table and setting up the cutlery, the rapper lightly shook y/n’s shoulder, a gentle smile on his face.

“Hm? What is it Kyun?”

“The food arrived~ let’s eat!”

© copyright work of @armysantiny 2021-2022

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If you’ve made it this far, thank you for reading! Considering leaving some feedback, or donating to my ko-fi!

Taglist: @teeztheflag, @intokook, @baby-dinobean | Taglist Form

[spacedikut]

the very insecure dr reid ; spencer reid

pairing: spencer reid x gn!reader

summary: “Could you write another fic about early Spence where he’s all insecure” combined with another request :) 5730 words

a/n: title taken from s1e5!! i wrote this months ago aka before i decided to try to make my fics gender neutral and i tried to make the appropriate changes but im also a dumbass so! yeah! 

masterlist

Spencer is a man of science, if you didn’t already know.

This means he doesn’t spend his time fretting over what isn’t there, what doesn’t have facts and evidence to back it up. Of course, he dabbles in reading conspiracy theories and enjoys learning about various religions and things of that sort, but these are to expand his already infinite knowledge, not because he particularly believes in them.

The first time he believed there was some kind of God was when you kissed him.

It was after the case where both Elle and Spencer were trapped on a train with a paranoid schizophrenic – he still remembers how you reacted when he agreed to being sent in, how you tried to keep it light-hearted but pulled him aside to solemnly tell him you didn’t think you’d be able to live without him (if you do something rash and stupid, Spencer, I swear to God-). You threatened to nipple cripple him if he did die, and it was weirdly motivating.

After he was checked over, and teased Elle about saving her life, you came crashing into him with an audible oof and a whisper of, “God you smell so good I’m so glad you’re okay don’t ever do that again.” It was probably the adrenaline, the near-death experience high, but instead of gently pushing you away like he’d do with anyone else, he discovers your waist has a wonderful dip that his arms fit perfectly into as he tugs you close.

He’s hugged people before, obviously, but it’s always different with you.

You must think so, too, because when you pull away just enough that you’re still in his arms but can clearly see his face, you take a minuscule intake of breath that Spencer wouldn’t notice if he wasn’t, you know, Spencer.

A strand of Spencer’s hair falls from where it was tucked, falling into his line of sight. Without hesitation you’re pushing it back, fingertips brushing against Spencer’s cheek as you fold the hair back behind his ear. Your eyes meet when there’s no obstruction, electricity crackling in Spencer’s ears when he realises there’s nothing between you, nothing stopping you, and there’s something about the lack of space between you and how he holds you that just makes you ask-

“Would it be weird if I kissed you right now?”

Immediately, Spencer thinks yes. Not because he doesn’t want you to (he couldn’t think of anything better to do, to be honest), or because of where you are (although, knowing the whole team is not far away does make him feel a little funny), it’s because he’s him. Gangly, awkward, with very sweaty hands that feel at home on your body, and you don’t want to kiss that. You can’t want to.

Yet, he shakes his head, and finds himself copying you when you lean in and close your eyes.

It’s short, sweet, and somewhat weird. He thinks he blacks out, loses himself in your lips despite it happening so quickly.

When you pull back, Spencer’s eyes remain closed for a good few seconds before he’s brought back to Earth. And he doesn’t know what to say - pretty people don’t just… kiss him. They certainly don’t ask if they can kiss him, then follow through, and… stare at him like that.

“Has anyone seen Reid? Y/L/N?”

Whatever was supposed to happen after, whether it was good or bad, you’ll never know. Hotch’s footsteps are thundering towards you and, despite your daze, you step away from Spencer just as he spots you.

The second time he believed there was a God, he asked you on a date. And you said yes.

Neither of you mention the kiss. In your defence, he supposes, it happened merely an hour ago – everyone’s rushing to get back to Quantico so no one’s had time to make any kind of small talk, let alone have the talk after a kiss.

Elle gives Spencer a look of confusion when she slides past him, moving into the jet as he hovers in the entryway. He’s obviously waiting for someone, passing out tight lipped smiles to the team when they all squeeze past. Spencer isn’t a big guy, but it’s bizarre for him to be standing there like that, swaying like the palm tree he is – he’s usually setting up for yet another game of chess with Gideon at this moment.

Then you shuffle on, faltering when you catch him waiting for you but smile nonetheless. He straightens, hands remaining in his pockets when his mouth opens to speak. You interrupt him (before he can make a fool of himself, thank God).

“Wanna sit together?” You ask, eyes never leaving his. He nods and follows you like the lost puppy he is.

The second you invite him to sit next to you instead of opposite he wants to pull you tight into his side, but that seems like too much. He’s not Derek, for Heaven’s sake, and you’re not Garcia – all you’ve done is kiss once and really, when he thinks about it, you were probably on an adrenaline high too, so it might’ve been a heat of the moment thing. It happens, Spencer’s read about it, and although it would break his heart that it meant nothing, it’s likely. Oh, it’s so likely.

Spencer might be the first one on the team to cry on the BAU jet.

Halfway home, the team is lost in their own pass-times to notice when you bookmark your page and place your book on the table.

“Spence,” You whisper, testing if he’s awake.

He is. He hasn’t been able to catch a wink of sleep, no matter how hard he tries. “Yeah?”

“I’m sorry if what I did earlier- you know-“ You gesture vaguely in the air, completely oblivious to the fact Spencer is very familiar with what happened earlier because he can’t stop replaying it, “-If that made you uncomfortable. Or if I forced you, or-“

“Would it be weird if I asked you on a date when we land?”

The grin you send him shoots straight to his heart, eyes crinkling with laughter at his echo of the words you used earlier. If you notice you don’t mention it, but his hands can’t stop fidgeting under the table, slick with sweat.

“It’d only be weird if you don’t kiss me after.” You say.

His brows furrow, a small incredulous laugh leaving him. “What? Why?”

“We’ve already had our first kiss, so it’s out of the way.”

“Are you saying… You want to kiss me again?”

You thought that was obvious from when you kissed him earlier, but you’re happy to remind him. “Yes. I would like that very much.”

“Okay,” He says, bashfully, with a lick of his lips. “I can- I can arrange that.”

This time, when you turn back to your book, your head finds his shoulder and Spencer thinks his it has turned to gold, blessed by being touched by you. Would it be too much if, the second you get back to base, he writes about this moment in great detail to his mother?

+++

All of that leads to now, where The Date is in three days.

He plans to take you to his favourite book café, a place you’ve always wanted to go but never had the chance to, and he was so, so excited. Any time he gets to spend with you is cherished and means more to him than it does to you, because to him it’s an excuse for you to give him more reasons to fall in love with you. And he does - fall in love - every single day.

Was is the important word here. He’s not excited anymore.

It’s terrifying how quick the tides can change.

Just this morning, he was glancing with child-like excitement at the outfit he’s already chosen for the date. You brought him some coffee, whispering an endearing, “Three days!” as you did, and, according to Derek, Spencer’s love eyes (what the hell does that mean) were so big even Derek fell in love with you for a second.

Now, Spencer’s not territorial, but that comment stuck with him. Maybe that’s why he’s here now.

He has to cancel the date.

It pains him – God, does it pain him – but he has to. He can’t go on that date with you. He can’t… put you through that. Make you spend time with him and have to let him down gently, slowly, like you’re talking down a temper tantrum. He can’t then pretend everything’s okay in front of the team. He won’t be able to pretend, because he’s liked you for months.

He won’t force you to go on that date with him. You deserve better than that, and better than him.

That’s what it comes down to: you deserve better than him.

It started that morning with Derek, as previously mentioned. Then the team was whisked away on a case, and the detectives were all over you. JJ, too, but they were too intimidated by Elle and Morgan, who just laughed at their attempts to impress you. It was borderline inappropriate, but you were too concerned with the victims and finding a serial killer to pay some officers and detectives you’ll never see again any attention.

Spencer noticed, though. And he couldn’t concentrate.

The detectives are dressed too well – by that, he means the suits and the Rolex watches are way above their paygrade – and they keep emphasising how good looking you and JJ are and how lucky the BAU is to have such dolls working on the team. What is this, the 40s? Who calls anyone doll anymore? And, yes, the team is very lucky to have you and JJ, but because you’re both great minds and wildly intelligent people that, yes, are also very gorgeous, but your looks aren’t all you have to offer, thank you very much.

There’s a detective approaching you, again, as you stand by the water cooler.

Spencer frantically looks around, trying to find a member of the team. “Morgan!” He weakly calls, because Spencer won’t scare him off. Maybe Morgan can chase them away like they’re stray cats, with his big muscles and scary eyebrows. Or Elle, who earlier merely lifted an eyebrow and the officers scattered like cockroaches.

All he catches of the conversation between you and the model/detective at the cooler is, “I appreciate it, but no thank you,” and that’s all he needs to hear.

He should’ve known someone would eventually make a move. You’ve said no, clearly, and Spencer doesn’t understand why. I mean, yes, he knows why – you have a prior engagement – but the detective… As much as he’s kind of a dick, he complements you better than Spencer does. Physically.

And there starts the spiral.

There must be something in the water, because every officer and detective and everyone in between is in peak physical condition with dashing looks to boot. They’re all straight out of a magazine, as if the popular kids from Spencer’s high school graduated and followed him here to remind him he is incredibly unworthy of you.

Spencer is lanky, unlike the broad men and curvaceous women here, and slicks his hair to the side rather than up like the others. He wears sweater vests, not blazers, and he’s so skinny that his trousers always look like hand-me-downs – nothing is fitted, like so many outfits are here.

They’re all everything Spencer is not. And Spencer is realising, quite quickly, that they’re the better ones – and that’s what you deserve. Better. The best.

It gets worse when they deliver the profile.

He finds his spot next to you, gives you a tight lipped smile, then looks at the outfits of his team compared to his own. Both Hotch and Morgan wear dark suits, well-proportioned and sophisticated in a way that Spencer is sure isn’t even in his calibre. Elle wears a deep green t-shirt, tucked into her tight black pants, and looks wonderfully intimidating with her double gun holster wrapped around her shoulders.

And you. You.

You wear a white shirt tucked into nicely tailored trousers, hair effortlessly styled with a pen tucked behind your ear. You all look like FBI agents. Intimidating. Prepared. Put-together.

Spencer… looks like he’s still in high school. He threatens no one, intimidates no one, and definitely does not make anyone feel inferior with his masculinity. He’s not an alpha male, is what he’s trying to say, and for each person he encounters in this wretched police department he feels himself shrinking.

So when they give the profile, he tries to say as little as possible. Tries to attract as little attention as possible, so when Hotch says his usual, “Thank you.” He can slip away unnoticed and hide from the superior beings.

It works, given everyone is too busy trying to save lives. Except you notice, and Spencer has to pretend he’s okay when you find him at the evidence board and tell him you’re excited for the date. He wants to believe you, truly does, but no matter how hard he digs into his brain to find a part of him that can fathom you see him as a better option than literally anyone else, it doesn’t exist.

You don’t seem to notice. He tells himself he’s glad, but there’s no denying the disappointment.

+++

Hotch calls it a night when the clock nears midnight. He says the team should get as much rest as possible and come in with fresh eyes tomorrow – despite this, the team knows most if not all of them will get little to no sleep, given that they’ll all be going over everything they’ve got so far in their hotel rooms.

You slink up to Spencer, a pep in your step even though you’re running on pure caffeine and nothing else. It’s then Spencer realises he has to do it now, because if he does it in the police department then he’ll be called unprofessional, but if he waits any longer than that he’ll be cutting too close and that’s a bad look.

“Y/N,” He says, coming to a stop before the elevators, allowing the rest of the team to head up. “I need to say something.”

You nod with a smile, covering a cute yawn when he takes a couple seconds to gather his thoughts.

You’re not sure what he’s gonna say, but you assume it’ll be to do with the date. Maybe a change of time, or a change of venue – he did mention the library café can get super busy on weekends – or, worst case scenario, the date will have to be postponed for whatever reason. And none are particularly bad, because you’re excited and just want to be with Spencer – it doesn’t matter if it’s not when he originally planned or where he originally planned.

But Spencer has always unwittingly been full of surprises.

“We can’t go on that date.”

Instantly you ask, “Why not?”

“Well-“ He seems caught off guard, like he wasn’t expecting you to question the sudden change of heart, “It’s complicated-“

“I’ve got time.”

“We should go to sleep-“

“Is it your mother?”

“No. No, it’s not.” Of course you look empathetic when you consider his mother might need him – a stab to the start. Add in the flicker of concern in your eyes – two stabs to the heart. “It’s not her. It’s- it’s nothing. Just, can we cancel?”

“And reschedule?”

“No.”

“Oh.”

The disappointment is clear on your face and makes Spencer feel so guilty, but not guilty enough to take it back. You’re not disappointed that you’re missing out on dating him, you’re frustrated that you’ve been building up to having plans on the weekend and they’ve suddenly been cancelled without reason. By Spencer, of all people. In a couple months’ time you’ll thank him, when you’re dating some bodybuilder who can grow a mean beard. You’ll thank him for not making you go on that date with him and forcing you to tell him you’re just not my type, Spence, and making everything awkward.

He can’t look at you. Maybe that’s why he misses the genuine sadness, the sudden glassiness of your eyes that humiliates you enough to make you angry. His words have ignited a fire in your chest that burns through your body like you’re made of gasoline, and you wish you could turn your thoughts off so you don’t start questioning how long he’s been wanting to reject you, if he even wanted to date you in the first place, how embarrassing it is to have been so openly eager when, apparently, he was very much not.

“I’m sorry.” He says, like it’ll do anything. He still can’t look at you and he feels like a coward.

“Yeah.” You sniffle.

He decides to take the stairs. You head for the bar, just for one drink.

+++

The following day, when an officer tries to talk to you, you blatantly ignore him. You tell him that unless it’s work-related, you’re really not interested, and word spreads quick that your pleasantries have died out and you’re not in the mood to tolerate creepy compliments.

There’s a permanent frown on your face that haunts Spencer the entire day. He knows exactly what’s going on – it’s his fault, after all – and he finds himself simultaneously avoiding you whilst witnessing your downcast mood.

Morgan starts investigating not long after you barely react to his terrible joke. He makes them for you, because you either choke on laughter or throw your pen at him, but this time it was like you weren’t even in the room. When Morgan poked you and asked if you heard him, your lacklustre reply was, “Hm? Yeah, good one.”

Morgan perches on the desk Spencer’s using. “You got any idea what’s going on with Y/N?”

“They’re mad at me.”

“You’re the reason they’re like this?”

Spencer doesn’t physically react, just says, as casually as possible, “Unless another person asked them on a date then cancelled without reason, then yes. It’s my fault.”

There’s no point in lying. Especially to Derek. Spencer doesn’t know how you’ll go about explaining your sudden poor mood, if you’ll curse his very existence or lie about it, but Spencer’s never been a good liar and the sooner everyone knows it’s his fault and he sucks, the better.

Morgan leans forward, attempting to make eye contact with the doctor who very much does not want to. “There’s a story there.”

“Obviously.”

“…You wanna go ahead and explain it?”

“Not really.”

“Alright,” Derek shrugs, “You stir in your sadness and continue being a sourpuss, I’ll go check up on Y/N and find out what really happened.”

Derek’s barely moved off the table when Spencer stops him, voice small like a child, “Wait, Morgan, I-“

You walk past then, too focused on a suspect list faxed in by Garcia to pay attention to anyone else. Spencer’s eyes follow you the whole time, and the look in Spencer’s twinkling eyes make Morgan slump back onto the table in realisation.

“Why’d you cancel, Reid?”

“I had to.”

“You had other plans?”

Spencer chews his bottom lip. “No. But I… I couldn’t take them on a date.”

Derek waits for him to elaborate.

“Have you seen the kind of guys hitting on them?” Spencer asks, scooting his chair closer so no one can eavesdrop. “They’re all… They’re- they’re like you, Morgan. All cool and put-together and actually look their age, for one, and I’m not that. I could never be that – and that’s what Y/N wants-“

“Have you asked them that?”

“No. But I’m a profiler, in case you forgot, and I think it makes sense that these big-shouldered, super muscly guys are all over-“

“But you haven’t actually asked them what they want.”

“No.” Spencer sighs, leaning back in his chair.

“That’s your first, and most vital, mistake, my man.”

Spencer purses his lips, catching you watching him over Derek’s shoulder. You immediately look away, shooting off to the evidence room as an escape, and Spencer’s cheeks burn with guilt and embarrassment.

He can’t believe he thought he had a chance with you.

“I feel like this should be obvious, Genius, but Y/N said yes to a date with you, then turned down every offer that came from someone that wasn’t you-“

“That’s because they already made plans with me and they’d feel terrible if they had to cancel for another, better offer. I made it easier for them.”

Derek gives him such an incredulous look Spencer wonders if he should burn his PhDs. “Are you serious?”

The crestfallen expression on Spencer’s face is enough of an answer.

“Come with me.”

“What?”

“C’mon,” Derek tugs Spencer up from his chair. “I need to show your dumb ass something.”

All that’s missing is classic spy music when Derek and Spencer sneak into the conference room the BAU is using. Only Hotch is in there, scribbling something down, barely glancing up when the two agents creep in like they’re on a mission.

Spencer doesn’t say anything until Derek reaches for your bag. “Whoa- Morgan-“

“Relax.”

Spencer just stares, brows halfway down his face, and watches silently.

“That’s they’re journal, Morgan, you can’t just read it-“

“It’s not, pretty boy.”

Hotch watches the interaction, mildly confused, then nods to himself when he realises what Morgan’s holding.

Morgan splays the journal on the table in front of them, flipping through pages with precision like it’s his notebook and not yours. When he lands on his desired page, it’s slid towards Spencer.

He reads it.

The Doctor Spencer Reid cheat sheet. (Because I do not have an eidetic memory and feel bad whenever I forget something he tells me)

He’s too stumped by the words cheat sheet to look further, so Derek does it for him, flipping to the next page where very basic information about Spencer sits – full name, date of birth, hometown. As he looks to the page next to it, he realises it’s full of his favourite things – favourite coffee, favourite candy (which has multiple answers, by the way), even favourite pair of socks. Like a switch has been flipped, Spencer comes to life, frantically switching between pages that are overflowing with facts and tidbits about him, from his favourite monologue from his favourite film to his favourite shelf in his apartment. All things he’s told you either in passing or when he’s confided in you at random times, you’ve taken note. You’ve listened, and for some reason you’ve written it all down so you’d never forget.

“What…What is this?”

“It’s everything there is to know about you, Reid.” Derek watches as Spencer slips through the rest of the book, filled with random to-do lists and phone numbers of various people, looking for the same information about the rest of the team. “There’s only one for you, you know. And if you ask me it’s a little creepy, but it’s saved our asses when it’s come to buying gifts for you a good few times.” He slaps a hand on his friend’s shoulder, smirking at how Spencer’s awe-filled eyes never leave the pages before him. “They care about you a lot, Reid. More than you think. So…”

“I need to talk to them.”

“Yes, idiot, you do.”

+++

That night, Elle and Derek invite you to join them for some drinks at the bar, promising they won’t let it escalate to arm wrestling and childish bets like they always do. Even though they make a compelling argument, add on that you’re stressed and upset and really, really want to forget emotions exist more than anything else, you’re half tempted to accept and lose yourself in some cocktails.

Then you spot Spencer talking in hushed tones with Gideon and everything comes flooding back. So you tell Elle to have a drink for you, please don’t make a ruckus when she gets back to your shared room, and bid them adieu.

In your room, you distract yourself by renting one of your favourite movies. It’s overpriced, and a part of you wants to look over the case files again, but being sad and burnt out won’t lead to any good outcomes.

It’s a futile attempt at switching your brain off so you don’t have to think about how excited you were for the date. You’ve had twenty-four hours to get over it, but every time you see him you’re thrown back into the bitterness you feel – bitter that you fooled yourself into thinking it’d work out, bitter that your hopes were so high, bitter that you let your feelings for Spencer become such a big part of your life.

You’re lying on your scratchy hotel bed, thinking about Spencer and how he’s going to be complaining to Morgan about said scratchy beds, when there’s a knock at your door.

Naturally, you assume its Elle. She reminds you so much of your older sister who used to slide you some money so you’d stay up late into the night and quietly let her back into the house after she’s sneaked off to go to a party – except Elle is probably swaying outside your hotel room after losing her keycard rather than swaying on your doorstep.

So when you open the door, teasing quip ready, you legitimately choke when you’re faced with a fidgety Spencer Reid.

He tries to ignore how the way your face drops when you realise it’s him feels like a punch to the gut.

“Hey-“

“No.”

“Oh.”

“You-what-“ He’s never seen you so flustered. “Are you lost?”

Just in case, Spencer leans back to check the number beside your door is in fact 208. It is, and he turns back to you, “Please don’t slam the door in my face.”

It slips out. “I wouldn’t do anything to jeopardise your pretty face.”

You’re humiliated that he has this effect on you, the ability to obliterate all your filters and common sense just by existing. But the look on his face alleviates the want to jump out of the window – his mouth opens, twitching into the smallest, most bashful smile before it falls and morphs back into disbelief. You just… You just called his face pretty, a word that makes some feel emasculated but no, never with you. You compliment people and mean it, which makes Spencer’s guilt worsen and the urge to tell you he loves you with his entire heart more intense.

You speak at the same time.

“Why are you-“

“I wanted to-“

You roll your lips together, holding back a smile, and nod for him to go on. He does the same, so you shake your head with a, “I was just asking why you’re here.”

He holds up a finger, signalling one moment, and opens his satchel to start rummaging in it. “I know this is a complete invasion of privacy, and theft, really, but Morgan showed me it and I just- Why do you have this?”

You gasp.

In his hand is the journal you’ve been working on since a month into your employment at the BAU. The gifted notebook was initially used to jot down any bits of advice your superiors gave you (on your first day, Elle gave you a list she lovingly titled “If I wasn’t an FBI agent I’d sock these people in the mouths”) but, before you knew it, it had an entirely different purpose.

It started when you witnessed Derek stumble when asked Spencer’s favourite colour, to which he said no one remembers stuff like that! Aptly followed by Spencer reeling off everyone’s preferred colours (even delving into second favourites and favoured colour schemes) and you realised then that… Spencer’s whole life, he’s remembered so much about the people around him and very rarely have they returned the favour. So, in an attempt to build friendship and because you had the fattest crush on him already, you started the Spencer Reid cheat sheet.

You didn’t think he’d ever see it, even if it’s always used by the team on various occasions. It was the team’s little secret, bar Spencer, that assisted in nearly every decision made on Spencer’s behalf – what to order from restaurants, drinks, birthday and holiday gifts, how to comfort him when he’s stressed or upset.

The responses vary. Derek thinks it’s weird, as did Elle at first, but JJ and Garcia insist its sweet and, really, no matter what they think they’ve all come running to you when time has called for it.

“How… Did you steal it?”

“Yes,” He tells you, guiltily, “I had to read it – it’s incredibly accurate, by the way.”

You don’t know if that’s a compliment or not.

“So… Why?”

“I don’t know,” You say, a bold-faced lie and Spencer can tell, but he lets you continue, “You remember everything about everyone else, so I wanted to… do the same for you, I guess.”

“I have an eidetic memory.”

You airily laugh – does he think you forgot that? “I know that. Doesn’t it get tiring recalling all this information about your friends and not having it reciprocated?”

He clicks his tongue at that, eyes falling back to the notebook in his hands that he fiddles with while he thinks. It is tiring, he supposes, but that’s how it’s always been. He remembers everything, the people around him just… don’t. He realised at a young age that he’ll often have to remind himself that friendship isn’t measured by what they remember, but by other ways – like this. You, with your unassuming journal that is full of things Spencer assumed no one would ever care to remember.

You, with your tensed jaw and fluttering eyes because you’re embarrassed.

You, who’s done quite possibly the sweetest thing anyone’s ever done for him, and it’s been happening for years right under his nose.

You, who he cancelled a date with because he was so sure you were dating him out of pity, out of obligation after he asked and you felt forced to say yes, but now he realises you care about him just as much as he cares for you.

Touched feels like an understatement.

“Y/N…”

“If you find it weird, I’ll burn it the second we get home. Pretend it never happened, we can… discuss a restraining order if we must-“

“Y/N.”

“Yeah?”

“Thank you.”

“Oh.”

He smiles at you, hands tight on the book in his hands, smiles so big that his eyes crinkle and his teeth show and he looks gorgeous. It tugs directly on your heart strings and just for a second you forget that he cancelled your date, forget that you’ve been pining for years, and bask in the warmth that radiates from him.

“This is… Insane, really.” He laughs, “But also so… so cool. I don’t deserve this, at all, and to think we could’ve gone on a date but I chickened out-“

“What?”

He shrugs with faux-nonchalance. “The-um- the reason I took back the date was because I think you deserve so much better than me. In a, you deserve someone like all the police officers down at the PD, kind of way. I don’t want a pity date-“

You scoff, then with an indignant, “Come in here,” You grab Spencer’s satchel and tug him into your hotel room, closing the door with a forceful push as he turns to face you.

With your hands on your hips, you stare him down with furrowed brows and a look that screams really? “Is that really what you think, Spence? It was a pity date?”

“Well, yeah,” He tells you. The conviction in his voice is so strong that, if you weren’t this riled up, you’d probably tear up at how sure he sounds.

You give another scoff. “Not only am I offended you think I’d do that to anyone, but I’m also mad that you don’t see how I look at you! Spencer, I’ve been into you since I started working here-“ His mouth falls open. You’re exasperated. “-and the notes were a way to get to know you, yes, but they were also because I couldn’t stop watching you and had to play it off like I was doing it for a reason. You’re my favourite, Spencer.”

His heart aches a little, full of such a tenderness he’s never quite felt before. He feels loved, and so, so touched that someone would put so much effort into getting to know him and… years. Literal years you’ve liked him, and he’s been blind to it.

“I like you a lot.” You’re breathless after your little speech, “And if you still don’t want that date, that’s okay. But I like you, Spence, I really like you.”

Your gaze never wavers. Spencer wants to scoop you up and place kisses all over. For the first time in a while, he feels worthy. Like what you’re saying isn’t being said for the sake of it, because you’re his friend and you have to support him, but because it’s what you genuinely think and feel and Spencer might be in love.

He swallows deeply before speaking.

“I really like you, too, Y/N. And I’m-I’m sorry that I cancelled the date and- I should’ve talked to you, maybe, before doing it, but… We’re here now, right?”

“You want to have a date right now?”

Thumbing through the book, he says, “Actually, there’s some blanks in here I’d like to fill, if you’re not busy…”

You’re very clearly on board with the suggestion, basically skipping to your bed, plopping down and patting the space beside you with a grin. “I’m not busy at all, Doctor Reid. Tell me everything I don’t already know.”

So he does, thigh pressed against yours and blush on his cheeks when you let your head fall onto his shoulder.

The night is spent giggling over the most random information you’ve gathered, correcting only one mistake (his favourite socks change every week, not your fault), and adding onto the already plentiful fact file.

And the date that weekend happens, ending in a sweet kiss on your doorstep that leaves you both with shy smiles and thundering hearts.

It’s the first date of many, followed by the creation of a new journal full of all there is to know about your and Spencer’s relationship.

+++

tags: @pinkdiamond1016 @bluerose512 @andreasworlsboring101 @bitchyreids @roses-and-grasses @ta-ka-shi-ma @chiffonchronicles @rexorangecouny @unmistakablyunknown @goofygubler14 @jasongideonapologist @gublertoon @averyhotchner

[cryptidmullet]

more renga headcanons bc i miss them

- rekis not one to like. hide his praise or anything he compliments langa a lot but just. every so often he'll grab langas wrist and look at him all soft and say "youre amazing langa" very reminiscent of how langa praises him and it just makes langa feel so fucking mushy and in love

- rekis used to affection from his family but thats kinda it and langas family was never super affectionate but he felt loved still but after his dad died he just felt super lonely but when they meet and start getting super close they both just feel like theyre overflowing with love both given and received and i just thinks that beautiful

- rekis chronically bad at opening bottles bc they hurt his hands and hes always embarrassed but he goes up to langa and is like. open please. and langa does KKFMSMFND

- it gets to the point he'll just go up to him with a bottle and langa will open it without being prompted

- yknow when youre really tired and you feel like youre floating in the ocean reki has that but he feels like hes rolling back and forth on his skateboard

- since he first started skating the movement and feeling got so ingrained in him that he'll be sitting at his desk or laying in bed and just feels the sensation of tick tacking like hes not moving he just can feel it like a ghost in his muscles and brain

- sometimes reki just wants to. stand on his board like not do anything just stand on it so he stores skateboards in his room and when he gets restless he'll just stand on one for a little bit

- reki talks to himself a lot he'll be doing some mindless task and then have a pretend conversation with nobody without even realizing it

- whenever reki cries or gets choked up about smth drinking water for some reason makes him feel better

- reki pokes the twins' bellies and blows raspberries on them to make them laugh :)

- langa cant pick up rice with chopsticks when he first moves to okinawa and reki makes fun of him but still teaches him how to do it

- langa has acne along his jawline its just bumpy and stuff

- reki wakes up and then lays in bed watching videos as long as he can before he gets up 

- he also holds his phone like two inches away from his face

- reki uses dark mode langa uses light mode until reki notices it forcibly changes it

- rekis phone is always at like really low brightness bc his eyes are sensitive

- its battery is also always low bc its an old phone and it takes forever to charge

- he takes a lot of pictures and videos of langa just for no reason half of them are blurry and out of focus and langas not paying attention but he keeps all of them

- he has a bookmark on instagram called 'langa' and its full of stuff that reminds reki of him or he wants to show him later

- langa and reki pair up for a presentation once and when theyre presenting they cannot stop laughing reki says um and pauses for a moment too long and langa does one of those long nose exhale laughs and it makes reki snort and then they keep messing up and barely get through it and when they walk back to their desks they shove each other while the class laughs

- langa has a really cheap purple phone case he got at walmart and rekis like dude thats so boring so he makes stickers for him to stick to it

- langa loves them but he also has this weird anxiety about putting stickers places bc he likes them and doesnt want to eventually get rid of whatever the sticker is on but reki tells him he'll make him more whenever he gets another phone so hes okay with it

- langa doesnt really fidget unless hes nervous and then he twists his fingers around but when hes sitting he rolls his right ankle a lot and his foots like always twitching really minutely 

- reki carries around a hairband partly for his sisters (and eventually langa) and partly so he can fidget with it

- langa carries one around too for the same reason but one day reki forgets it during work so langa gives it to him bc he looks restless 

- and langa kinda feels really bare and doesnt know what to do without it so he just rubs his wrist a lot but he doesnt mind 

- reki will get up to go do smth but just sit down curled in a ball on the floor bc he gets distracted for whatever reason and after like 20 minutes of scrolling through his phone hes like wait what was i doing

- reki has a scar on his lip/chin bc he bailed really hard and hit his chin on the concrete and bit through his lip 

- langas a dry ass texter when he and reki first meet bc he didnt really have anyone to text before

- but eventually he googles how to turn auto caps and everything changes

- hes actually funnier over text sometimes bc hes less restrained 

- hes made a ur mom joke and then was like wait i take it back i love your mom im sorry :c 

- and he points out every time reki misspells a word just to annoy him

- reki scrolling through tiktok and he randomly starts crying at a wholesome video and langas like.. you good man and rekis like look at this FRICKING tiktok dude and then langas crying too KFMSMFND

- obligatory "we make a good team" line idk the context ill think about it later but theyre gay they have to say it

- langa promised his mom hed go to the store but had to do a last minute shift at dope sketch and rekis like oh ill do it for you i already know what you get

- langa has a sweet tooth he loves candy and hot chocolate and all that stuff and reki is lowkey an enabler he always brings candy w him or has a bag in his room

- when reki laughs he wraps his arms around his stomach and hes the type to go silent when he laughs hard enough

- he'll go from standing normally to bent over to crouched down to falling and rolling on his back or side from laughing so hard

- its pretty rare but sometimes he snorts in the middle of a laugh too

- when langas laughing Really hard its loud and kind of wheezy and almost like a cackle and he covers his mouth most of the time just out of habit

- he curls up when he laughs too so he'll be laying on rekis bed or the floor and reki says smth that catches him totally off guard and he starts fucking cackling and brings his knees up to touch his forehead hitting his leg and wheezing

- langa helps reki teach chihiro and nanaka how to ride a bike and the four of them go on little bike rides together occasionally

- the twins pulling on langas pant leg until he bends down so they can whisper gibberish in his ear and the first time langa is like ??? but then he learns to just laugh and nod 

- all of rekis sisters coming into rekis room while langa is there to be like :D langa :D and reki herding them out and yelling we're busy and then just flopping on his bed to continue scrolling through his phone in silence

- reki does the older sibling thing and just stands in koyomis doorway 

- miya makes a meme reference that reki doesnt get and hes like god youre old and it wounds reki on a personal level

- reki has a piece of graphite just like permanently stuck in his leg bc when he was younger his friend accidently stabbed him with it and it broke off and just. stayed there

- reki gets super obsessed with one song for a week or two and he'll listen to it on loop like 10 times in a row and he learns the lyrics to them no matter the language and by proxy langa always has the stuck in his head

[laximpulsion]

love the new chapter!! Can't wait for the next one, do u have any fave leatin fics i can check out in the meantime?

Why thank youuuu!! So glad you're liking it :) Lol, very good question! To give you a needlessly long answer with a lot of disclaimers...

It all starts with the kind of funny fact that i actually got into the wilds because of Shoni! But by the time i started writing I had done a HARD pivot to leatin. And now that I write, I do a lot less reading than I did before, so I don't actually have as many leatin fic recs as one might hope. (I definitely have more shoni fics bookmarked on my ao3 page than leatin ones lmao it's kind of funny)

ALSO, I tend to actively avoid fics that sound similar to what I'm writing now or what I plan on writing in the near future. So for that reason I have not read many S3 fics or post-island fics. And a side effect of this is that i DO read a lot of AUs, so this might be mostly AUs, sorry if thats not your jam!! maybe someone else can chime in with canon fics?

anyway. i KNOW im gonna be missing lots of good ones so sorry in advance but here's some ideas to get you started:

This feels like low hanging fruit but it's true - anything by lostresidentevilpotter is a good bet, the ex-girlfriends one was an instant classic for me and actually i think it was one of the first leatin fics i ever read! really you could spend a week making your way through the lostresidentevilpotter archives and it would be a week well spent.

I'm also a big JourEtNuit fan - this one where all the girls go into witness protection after the island was another instant classic, and another of the ones that I read really early on in my fandom journey so it has a special place in my heart. more recently i loved the The Last of Us AU !

Perhaps an unconventional pick because it's not my usual thing but this social media AU where the girls start a joint tiktok account after the island has TOTALLY charmed me and I adore it, always makes me smile.

I really enjoyed this series by tardexlanoche - think this is actually the only full-on s3 fic I've read, and I loved the premise set up by the first one in the series where Fatin and Leah were kind of almost friends before the island. Plus i believe there will be a sort of AU of itself that branches off after the first fic in the series about what would happen betw. them if they never went to the island, which I think is a super neat concept.

And one of the few other canon-adjacent fics I read and enjoyed a lot is The Fall by Ecrooked24 , where leah and fatin get stuck in a ravine and have to confront their feelings - with angst aplenty. (I've also been loving Polaroids!!)

And then there's a few others that only started recently but I'm keeping an eye on because they intrigued me -

tip the world on its side - leah sees gretchen in LA, i have no idea what's going on but i'm very into it so far

this compass tattoo soulmate au - i am not usually a soulmate AU kind of gal but this one has got me hooked!

this ghost hunter AU - had me at ghost honestly! and then had me again at ghost *hunter* lol

this one where Fatin leaves Leah annotated books - annotated books are such a cute concept and it was SO ruined by jeff doing it!

whew okay...sorry this was so long but if you follow me you should hopefully know by now that i write fucking NOVELS any chance i get hahaha. if anyone has anything else to add please feel free!! especially s3/canon-adjacent/post-island fics!

EDIT: suggestions from the comments - these are all great too, i've read a lot of them and started others!!

Mad Girl's Love Song by ThornedRose44 come home to my heart by scoutshonour, Sleepless in Sylvester by comicc_bookk_jawnss, pull you from the tide aka the tinder series au by overnights, did you win? aka the celeb au by lunchables, and can't forget the amnesia au i was dangerously tangled (the second time i met you) by rosymidnights.

[eeverlark]

2022 WRITING REVIEW

tagged: @rosesau @ttimbradford <3

1. number of stories posted to ao3: 27 (±2 bc i updated 2 fics that i started last year) but i reached over 100 works on ao3!!!!!

2. word count posted for this year: 101,410 (technically More bc i wrote ofic but that is obviously not posted anywhere)

3. fandoms i wrote for: marvel (spider-man), dc (batman, superman), pjo, the atlas series, six of crows, the raven cycle/the dreamer trilogy, hp, and goncharov 😭

4. pairings: petermj, petergwen, percabeth, libbynico, kanej, bluesey, blue/adam, clois, gonchandrey

5. stories with the most

kudos: accidental heroism (the batman) 3,357 bookmarks: the jones-watson-parkers (spider-man) 844 but since that was posted last year it's technically accidental heroism again w 640 comment threads: yet again... the jones-watson-parkers with 133 but it is still accidental heroism with 47

6. work i'm most proud of (and why): ummmm idk actually the work im most proud of is my ofic theo and i cannot Show that to u anyway it's bc i have never rly fully revised smth like. overhauled it n all that bc i finally Understood theo's character and it was such a RUSH to work on her fr and ive produced some of my Best Writing To Date!!! for fic tho uh??!??!?!? im pretty proud of most fic ive written this year bc i have tried rly hard ok 😭 usually i can pinpoint a single fic but i think ive written consistently well ???

7. work i'm least proud of (and why): a home for two (spider-man) mostly because i did Not vibe writing it i was literally pulling teeth trying to finish it but ppl seem to like it idk

8. share of describe a favorite review you received: this comment from a fic i posted last year bc "this fic is so PRETTY, literally poem in prose form im weeping. there's such a... melancholic vibe to it. or perhaps nostalgic. just, wow." has stuck w me forEVER!! and genuinely any comment i have even received from ao3 user Fairy527...u will ALWAYS be famous 2 MEEE!!!!!!

9. a time when writing was really, really hard: uh not for fic but i was tearing my hair out writing theo partially because of the content and partially because it is quite literally Difficult to write what's perfect in your head and i haven't even written theo to my own standards ngl

10. a scene or character you wrote that surprised you: the entirety of final goodbye because. Well. who knew i would be writing goncharov fic actually who knew goncharov would even exist fr

11. a favorite excerpt of your writing: ok not to have an ego but there r a fair few bits

Here's the thing about loss: sometimes you grow up and around a person, fitting and stretching and expanding to add them to the patchwork of yourself, and when they leave, there's a scar between both bodies. One here, one gone. An open wound. It's surprising how much time you can spend with someone and still come out the other end empty-handed. (slip of reality | spider-man)

Touching her eclipses his image of Elysium. ANDDDD Annabeth faces her past self, a funhouse reflection of who she once was. Neglect and trauma have warped Young Annabeth into something smaller—into someone smaller. (the annabeth project | pjo)

The Ronan after was broken, a raven of a boy, all hollow-boned. Yearned for flight, yet trapped by a cage of his own making. (the living lynches | tdt)

The very fact of her breathing astounds him for some reason. There are working lungs, a network of veins, a beating, beautiful heart hidden inside her body. She is wonderfully, colossally alive. (a kiss without a kiss | trc)

12. how did you grow as a writer this year: oh i have learned to appreciate writing first person bc of theo <3 and writing a little longer things bc i am a serial 1-2k oneshotter and i have Exceeded that a bit

13. how do you hope to grow next year: perhaps i will Finally finish a multichapter fic jesus christ

14. who was your greatest positive influence this year as a writer (could be another writer, beta, cheerleader, etc): seedemma <3 u made me worse as a person. also tangentially em's professor . why has that random man infiltrated my life i've never met him. anyway jack im also kithing u on the mouth btw

15. anything from your real life show up in your writing this year: none that i can point out at the top of my head ! well. except for theo 🧍🏻‍♀️ i gave her too many lysisms which is concerning considering everything wrong w her n her chronic patheticness

16. any new wisdom you can share with other writers: new wisdom??? god not rly but here is some OLD wisdom that i feel like other writers shld always listen to... read MORE BOOKS!!!!!!!!!! i swear u can taste the visceral difference btwn someone who writes and reads n someone who writes without reading n like ive read a fair few books this year and it has def seeped into my writing fr

17. any projects you're looking forward to starting (or finishing) in the new year: working on the Novel™ n also attempting to finish all these wips i have left in the grave

18. tag some writers whose answers you'd like to read: ngl i forgot who writes fic im sorry so @bluepinstripes & @ogiroud (who won't see this until jan fr)

[stormxpadme]

1, 5, 11, 16, 21, 26, 27, 32, 34, 37 god i hope i wrote the numbers right im on mobile. also full disclosure idr scheduling this so it was fun figuring out whats happening. my answers coming as soon as the laptop awakens, till then, tell me everything 😍💖💖💖💖

Weird Questions for Writers

1 -  What font do you write in? Do you actually care or is that just the default setting?

I’m a Bookman old style girl indeed. As my followers know at this point, I’m a dinosaur aka proud Xennial, generation analogue to digital, from typewriter to cloud. So I went from the first Word programs to what we have now and also had my first office jobs when the whole PC thing was still in its first stages. Everyone especially in business life used Times and Arial and Verdana back then, and honestly, I was just really bored by those. So when I got on my own PC and started transcribing my fanfics from handwritten to electronic, I chose something that was still easy to read but didn’t look like work. And that stuck. I even use that font in my work life whenever I can get away with it. I just really love Bookman old style.

5 - Do you have any writing superstitions? What are they and why are they 100% true?

I don’t think so? Though if it counts, I’ve encountered prophetic writing with my stuff before and that can be pretty creepy. Like, in an entirely non religious way, of course, because I’m agnostic, but like ... visions put in writing. Stuff of my stories that came true weirdly specific in one shape or another later. So there’s that.

11 - Do you believe in the old advice to “kill your darlings?” Are you a ruthless darling assassin? What happens to the darlings you murder? Do you have a darling graveyard? Do you grieve?

Nah, I have a very hard time killing my protagonists. So if it happens at all, you can be sure I’ll find a way to bring them back at some point. At that point when I do kill them off tho, I cry. Like, a lot.

16 - What’s the weirdest thing you’ve ever used as a bookmark?

Nothing strange, I think, I was just one of those sinners as a kid using dog-ears.

21 - Could you ever quit writing? Do you ever wish you could? Why or why not?

Nope, not gonna happen. This is the thing that keeps me alive, and I don’t have any suicidal tendencies these days.

26 -  How do you get into your character’s head? How do you get out? Do you ever regret going in there in the first place?

A lot, I think, with faceclaims when it comes to my own characters. Watching the material I got of the actors in questions, doing moodboards, videos, stuff like that. It was very inspiring for many scenes in the past. Then there’s the good old impersonating them in your head in calm moments like under the shower or when brushing your teeth, playing random scenarios in your head, contemplating how they will react. But in the end, a lot of characterizing only comes when I actually write them.

27 -  Who is the most stressful character you’ve ever written? Why?

I’ve got a lot of anxiety about my current first trans character, especially since the canon faceclaim is no other than Elliot Page. So I’m just really terrified I’ll fuck this whole thing up because it is not my personal corner of queer so I can’t write from experience.

32 -  What is a line from a poem/novel/fanfic etc that you return to from time and time again? How did you find it? What does it mean to you?

I’m more prone to movie lines than book quotes tbh, and poetry is not my world. I can cheat here though, since movie is based on a book, so Imma go with PS, I love you here.

“You made my life. But I'm just one chapter in yours.“

I’ve used that sentiment two times myself, in the two longest fanfiction projects I made, one of which I’m working on right now, and it’s breaking me every time.

And from the same movie (there’s reasons I can’t sit through this without crying):

“Thing to remember is if we're all alone, then we're all together in that too.“

Also something I used before in stories, and a thought that sometimes help.

34 -  Thoughts on the Oxford comma, Go:

I hate it with the passion of a thousand suns since it has no place in German, and if grammarly wouldn’t do it for me, I would never use it.

37 -  If you were to be remembered only by the words you’ve put on the page, what would future historians think of you?

Hopeless romantic as long as there’s enough torture involved.

[lazarus-harp]

I hope this isnt strange, but do u have any etn fanfic recommendations? Been trying to read more hehe and you seem p active here in the fandom so I figured u might know of the good ones that are out there. Dont really care about format, like it could be either here on tumblr or on something else like ao3 idc. I like seasons 2 3 and 4 and dont have any triggers or whatever so I'm pretty much good with whatever you think deserves a read!! love your blog by the way, also if you wanted to recommend any other blogs to also follow that would be pretty nice, no pressure tho. Thanks in advance 😊

this isn't strange at all! i'm super honored to have someone ask me for recommendations on anything, so thanks so much for this ask! love engaging with people so, ya know! i'll go ahead and start with blogs to follow because that'll be a nice start to this, and then the fanfiction recs will be under read more.

some etn blogs to follow are :

@escapethenightcrack : i think this blog is a given! before i even started this blog, this one has always been floating around. there's all kinds of different content out there from varying seasons. not to mention the person running the blog is super nice and open to having conversations about the characters! highly recommend them for anyone looking for etn blogs to follow. you always get what you come for and they occasionally post questions you can respond to! fun time overall and i admire them a lot. please go check them out and follow if you haven't already! <3

@poeticpains : a newer blog on the scene but one of my favorites already, personally. they make a variety of things from embroidery to playlists which you don't often see in this fandom ; so following them is worth it because you never know what art form you might get for etn! and thanks to the abundance of reblogs, this fan blog helps you find other accounts if you haven't seen them already. overall a new blog that kinda has it's own unique style! they also reblog quotes and tag etn characters which i personally really enjoy and, again, haven't really seen done before. the person running it is also someone i highly respect! so yeah, go follow!

just realized that me singing praise to every blog tagged could get very tiring to read, so lemme just. finish up recommending blogs without all the theatrics. but every single one im @-ing deserves praise and they all post some intriguing etn content that either makes you laugh, makes you think, is simply just fanart/writing, or they have some sort of creative ideas for it they wish to talk about! and all of those things are cool to see! ahem so : @fishyspider, @thatotherothersideblog, @lydiais-dead, @elfie-loves-you, @remaking-machine , and @warning-rune !

obviously there's more blogs out there but these are the ones i would personally recommend for branching out. you'll probably find more blogs from these ones alone! for starters, i will immediately say that i have my own ao3 account! WitchyTwitchy! and anything in my bookmarks is highly, highly recommended. there's also my stories which are a tad old, honestly, but they're not the worst ever! but besides that, let's get into the nitty gritty fanfic recommendations!

then they kill you ( and then they love you again ) - the moment you asked for fic recs for etn, this was actually the first fic i thought of. it's a s4 fic that focuses heavily on rosanna and the trials she endures mentally in purgatory. this is a work that has stuck with me since it's original posting and always puts me in this weird grief-stricken mood due to how vivid ro's emotions are. the format could be a bit confusing to read given the long paragraphs and lack of dialogue marks ( " ) but since you don't mind that, i highly recommend! whenever i want to get in my s4 feels or even get inspired to write something heartwrenching, this is the fic i always go to.

how the story goes - another s4 fic that's just a nice, quick read. it mainly follows destorm and how his dynamic with alex changed over the course of the season, while adding a layer of depth to it. though this isn't a big fave of mine, i adore it nonetheless and believe it's one of the few etn fics that focus on alex/destorm in that season anyway, so! but that leads me to the next fic rec, which is from the very same author who wrote this -

love, and how to kick it - honestly, this is one of the first fics i ever read in the etn tag ever and it was a pretty solid introduction. if you're a fan of soulmate aus and hopeless situations, this one is for you! it's s3 and the main character is nikita, who goes through the story torn between her love for manny vs her soulmate-love for mat. which is handled extremely well and pulls at your heart, just how nikita's being tugged around by hers. there's some good ro/mat moments as well! genuinely a good fic all around and makes you want to see more soulmate aus in etn in the same vein as this!

if i fall - a s3 fic that's an au, but instead of changing the outcome of a death ( as you typically see ) it's making up a new challenge entirely and forcing the final five to endure it! this one is a refreshing fic to me and elaborates on dynamics in the current setting of the show in a very intriguing way. there's angst galore and everyone who has to do the challenge has thoughts that feel extremely in character for them to have, causing you to feel awful and torn between both teams. it's a decently long read, which the fandom definitely needs more of, so that's a plus as well! there isn't much more to say without spoiling it, but the creativity taken and the twists and turns are excellent. also, fyi, if you want to read more etn fics, this person is chalk full of them on their ao3 account! so check them out in general.

right down to the second ( i can feel my breath unfold ) - another s3 fic ( sorry! they just have the most fics ) but this time it's a nicely wrapped up 'how the final six can potentially live' au. the main reason im placing this down is because of how recent it is in the fandom, and i think it's very important to support works that have been posted recently. especially since writers ( and editors ) are the only ones keeping this fandom afloat! however, besides that, this fic is one of the better ones ive seen recently. i was not expecting the plot nor the friendship development this fic expertly dishes out. you can tell they really adored each member of the final six, and you'd be surprised how rare that is in the fandom. it's heartwarming and follows matthew caring deeply for everyone there and it deals with amazing trauma in the second work. definitely recommend

okay! to be brutally honest, besides the fics listed here and the fics you can find in my bookmarks, i can't really think of any other fanfics to recommend you? this took a while to come out, seeing as i looked through the ao3 tag a couple times and tried to pick my favorite ones. or the ones off the top of my head! while the fics here isn't a lot, every author on this list has at least one more etn work attached to them ; so feel free to gather more that way! i really hope this helped, and im beyond honored to be asked for fic and blog recs! makes me feel like im doing something in the fandom, if that makes sense? either way, thanks so much for this ask and for enjoying my blog ---- feel free to message/ask me things at any time! this was fun 🧡

[ultimatebethylficlist]

Veteran Author of The Month: August 2021

The featured veteran author for August is none other than a co-admin right here at UBFL, @courtneyshortney82 !

Courtneyshortney82 can be found on AO3.

When asked what got her into Bethyl and what the fandom means to her, she said:

My love of Bethyl started with the hug. I was absolutely in love with the thought of the show pairing those two together. Of course a certain show runner decided that we didn’t get that, but I was already in over my head! I hadn’t really explored the fanfic world at that point, but a few years later I was running out of fics for another ship of mine and decided to look and see if anyone had ever written something for Bethyl. The first fic I read was Surprise by @leighj11. I started reading everything she had written and then explored just about every tag I could find and soon all of my bookmarks and read later lists were Bethyl. Bethyl means so much to me. I’ve made some amazing friendships because of this ship. I started talking to @im-immortal because of her fic Most Wanted and now she’s one of my best friends and the person that encouraged me to start writing and the person that reads everything I write as soon as I finish it. I truly didn’t think that I would become so active in the fandom, but now I’m part of the team that runs Ultimate Bethyl Fic List and posting as much as I can.

For her personal fic rec list, she recommends:

Most Wanted by SquishyCool 

I Will Follow You Into The Dark by Aireabella 

Surprise by LeighJ

Home isn’t Always A Place by leftmywingshome

Marilyn by wandering_gypsy_feet 

Scrubs & Grease by Piper1016

Call Me Friend But Keep Me Closer by pietromavximoff

between the beginning and the end by sheriffandsteel

Fog on the Windows by thedevilyouknow106

Magnolia by galadrieljones

Summer Hire by veecws

Linger by deerntheheadlights

What Signs Remain by lindentree

Fifty Four Days by LemonStar

Courtneyshortney82′s Works & Personal Thoughts:

In My Blood Summary: Rick Grimes had been either a Deputy Sheriff or a Sheriff since he was 20 years old, so a phone call at 10 p.m. was nothing new. Phone calls like this were part of the reason he now checked the Divorced box when filling out paperwork. But this call was the first to ever make him feel like he had ice coursing through his veins. "Rick, it's T… you're gonna wanna get every man you got to the Greene Farm, but you gotta get to Beth." "How bad is it?" Rick asked T-Dog. Theodore Douglas was Hershel Greene's right hand man and he wouldn't willingly request for the cops to come to the farm if things hadn't gone south. Rick also knew that if T was telling him to get to Beth, it meant the youngest Greene was in danger. "Hershel’s dead - that's all you need to know, man. You promised the old man if this ever happened, you’d protect Beth. So play cop later and get her the fuck outta Georgia!" If T-Dog had been capable of slamming the phone down, Rick was sure he would have. Thoughts: This was my first fic I ever attempted to write and the first I posted. I think this will always be one of my favorites because it was the first time I really put myself out there into an unknown situation. I love my little mob AU world. I can’t wait to finish this fic and take everyone on the journey that I’ve had in my head for the past two years. 

Gracie Summary: It wasn’t just the blonde hair. But those same pale blue eyes, same pale skin—pale skin marred by scars, but still perfect. They’d put her in sweats like they’d done to him, but hers were clean and light pink. Still had that fucking handle on the back for one of those assholes to lead her around. The look on her face was most likely a mirror image of his own. Shock. Trying to figure out if the person in front of them was real or just an effect from being stuck in this place. Thoughts: This one has been such a surprise to me. I still can’t believe the response that I’ve received. I was afraid to even mention this idea that had been swimming around my head, but I threw the idea out there and it went from a fic I might write one day to the fic that I had to get out. It’s quickly becoming my most popular fic and I’m so grateful to everyone that has been reading and responding!

The Perfect Gift Summary: Convincing Merle to join them to pick out a tree had been easy. She offered him dinner and a new bottle of Jack Daniel’s if he would help Daryl get the tree loaded on the truck and set up in the house. She also planned to get him in on the decorating, but he didn’t need to know that part yet. Merle was all bad words and crude phrases, but underneath it - when he let down the guard he’d built up - you could find the child that still lived inside of him. Thoughts: My first one shot! This was all about Merle. It definitely has Daryl and Beth, but Merle takes the stage and made me love writing him! I also learned I like to write stories to make people laugh!

Early Arrival Summary: He let go of one thigh to put an arm across her hips, pinning them to the bed, while his other hand went to the back of her thigh and pushed her leg up higher, opening her up wide to him. Beth dug her nails into his scalp and his answering groan vibrated through her. Fuck, she wasn't sure she could get more aroused --but this man was doing amazing things with his tongue and she felt like every nerve in her body was responding. Thoughts: I was always afraid to write smut, but I finally did it! This is my favorite smut I’ve written. I wrote it based on a request from @im-immortal​. I had no idea it would be a certain kink a lot of us shared.

Roots & Wings Summary: There's something about the fresh Montana air early in the morning. Especially in the fall, when there's a bite to the wind. This was Beth's favorite time of the day. Sitting on the wrap-around porch in the rocking chair her granddaddy had made for her grandma when her dad was born, the blanket her mom had crocheted for her wrapped around her shoulders, and a strong black coffee in her hands. The heat of the mug keeping them warm. Thoughts: This was an idea from @raginglittlehurricane​. We both love the show Yellowstone and noticed the parallels between Daryl and Beth and one of the couples on the show. A fic just had to happen. All I can say is - Cowboy Daryl! 

Who Let Dog Out Summary: Opening the door, the answer to one of his questions was answered. The damn dog couldn't be barking in the house because he was sitting outside. On the porch. Looking very pleased with himself. He'd also brought along the leggy blonde with the big blue eyes from across the street. Thoughts: I wrote this for the Ultimate Bethyl Fic List event - Matchmaker Merle. I always intended for it to be a one shot, but I kept getting requests for me to continue it. I also fell in love with this universe and just couldn’t tear myself away from it so now it’s a multi chapter!

[klaus-is-the-real-number-1]

She moves in her own way (Number 5 x reader)

Ask: Could you do a Five x reader where the reader is sarcastic like him, but polar opposites at the same time? Like they are scared to talk in public and prefer tea with milk and sugar, they try to be very kind and sweet to others. They bonded over a book they were reading in a coffee shop and starting talking there, they were super shy, but after a few minutes of conversation Five got them to open up?

A/N: Hope you enjoy this! I changed it up a bit to being in a library first like getting the book then into a coffee shop. i uh posted this then deleted it so this is like version two that might be better but now im just stressin,, this could also be made into a pt 2 tbh

Words: 1559

Books towered high in the dimly lit building, the smell of paper resonating throughout with history dripping from every page. Aimlessly, your fingers skimmed over the spines of the many books, the worn down fabric feeling like a secret code telling all their secrets of every reader. As you walked you waited for a book to call out to you, for you to read every word as if it was the last time you would ever see a book again. Then a calling came, causing you to stop dead in your tracks. Pulling the book from its tightly packed shelf, you peer at the familiar cover; a book that you could recite every word without flaw yet every time you read it you felt like a child opening a toy on christmas. Gently, your thumb ran over the endented title of the book, The Odyssey by Homer.

Book in hand you walked down the stairs, hand running down the wooden banister that leads to the desk, it was a familiar walk down the spiral steps. Your gentle steps echoed throughout the library as you descended, preparing your library card to sign the book out for what must be the near 20th time. Smiling at the familiar receptionist, you slid the book along with your card towards her and watched her scan your card before taking the slip out of the front of the book, just before she scanned it she looked at it to be met with line after line filled with your name from checking it out.

“Hun,” She says as she just puts the slip back into the book. “I’m going to let you keep this book.” Before you could even open your mouth to protest she cut you off. “I insist, hunny, you seem to be the only one who ever signs it out and we can always order another.”

“Thank you so much.” You smile at her, slipping the book, your book, into your bag. She slides your card back over the counter towards you and winked as you picked it up, smiling again, you head towards the doors and onto the busy road. The streets were bursting with life, cars beeping and whizzing past and people loudly talking. It was a contrast to your slow quiet life, keeping out of the way and too yourself as much as possible. Most would see it as a tragedy but the ability to lose yourself into another world is something magical, to shut away all your problems and become someone else.

One drop of rain fell from the ever darkening sky, only to turn into two, to three to be an increasingly heavy stream, your pace quickened as you saw the neon light for the town diner coming into view, offering itself as a safe haven from the ever worsening weather. The bell chimed as you walked in, warm air hitting your face as it snuck out the door behind you before you could close it.

Once you were in you spot an empty table in the corner, out of the way of everyone and pull out The Odyssey, eyes reading the words that you had read over and over again. Your finger danced over the page as you read, getting ready to turn the page.

“Tell me, O Muse,” A boy said as he slid into the seat opposite you. “of the man of many devices-”

“Who wandered full many ways after he had sacked the sacred citadel of troy.” You finish the sentence and lock eyes with him, only to look back down to your book when his eyes started to linger for too long, making your face turn red. You knew all too well the opening lines to the Odyssey, not even having to think about what came next.

“What can I get you guys today?” The waitress smiled at you both, yet the boys calculating eyes never left yours.

“Please can I get a tea?” You asked softly.

“With sugar and milk?” You just nod at her and smile, watching her return the gesture.

“Coffee,” He says still looking at you before sharply flicking his eyes to the waitress. “black.” Then his eyes landed right back on you.

“Thank you.” You say to the waitress before she walked away, your eyes trail down to your book but become distracted as holes were being burnt into your soul. “You know it’s rude to stare.” A smirk broke across his face at your words, leaning back and crossing his arms over his chest.

“I didn’t realise people causally read Homer.” His eyes continued to burn into yours, clearly enjoying your ever reddening cheeks.

“Can one not enjoy a classic piece of literature?” You posed, placing your bookmark into the worn book before setting it down onto the table. Breaking his gaze to look at the waitress as she placed your drinks on the table, you smile at her before gripping your hot mug, letting the warmth seep into your fingers.

“Do you know it in ancient Greek?” He sipped his coffee, seemingly challenging you.

“Not yet but I’m learning, it’s hard to teach yourself a dead language.” You look down at your book, unable to match his stare without making yourself too uncomfortable. He clearly didn’t get the hint from your fidgeting and now crimson face how uncomfortable you had become, or maybe he simply didn’t care.

“I’m fluent,” He shrugged his shoulders. “Maybe I could teach you sometime-”

“Yeah, let me just clear my schedule for a stranger who has been staring at me non-stop and being kind of creepy, seems like a solid plan.” You sarcastically say to him, taking a sip of your tea. For the first time he looked away from you and smiled to himself, being shocked at you sudden sarcastic outburst.

“I’m Five.” He stuck his hand out for you, your eyes flicked from his face to his hand before reaching over and taking it.

“Y/n.”

Five seemed to relax, talking in a softer tone and easing off the staring. He started asking questions about you, mainly your reading and opinions on Homer, as well as opening up about how his father made him learn it in ancient greek from a young age. Five was a very peculiar boy who hid behind a mask, he was a closed book with a lock around it but you were determined to find the key. 

Somehow, you had cracked and agreed to his offer to teach you the dead language of ancient greek but the way his face broke out into a genuine smile made it worth it, as much as you didn’t want to admit it it, Five was growing on you. 

The next day you found yourself sat in the library, legs swinging freely under the chair you were sat in, eyes following Five as he walked up and down the aisle looking for books. Just when you thought he found the right one, he’d sigh and place it back to then walk to the next set of shelves. Eventually he gave up his search, sighing in defeat as he returned to your table. “Come on, I’ve got the books we need at my house.” He pulled you up by your hand and began a fast paced walk with you trailing behind him like a lost puppy. 

Not paying attention to where you were walking, you bump into Five who had stopped dead in his tracks, now facing a large building. Hand still in yours, he stepped forward and pushed the gate open and made his way to the door.

“You live here?” He just smiled at your question before continuing up to the door. His house was like a mansion, it was a mansion, taking up nearly a full block. Silence filled the air once Five closed the door behind you, the large building having no signs of any other life. He gently took your hand again and started walking through the mansion. Dust particles were floating like fairies in the streams of sunlight that beamed through the windows, illuminating the wooden furniture and portraits that looked as if they hadn’t been seen in years, stuck in time until someone would come along and free them. 

Suddenly you found yourself in a brightly lit room, your eyes took a second to adjust before being able to get a good look. You were met with shelves on shelves of books, definitely being able to qualify as a library on its own. Dust caked the books, like it was a room frozen still. “Wow.”

“No one really comes in here anymore.” He says leaning against a large wooden table. 

“If I lived here, I’d be in here all the time.” His eyes followed you as you walked over to one of the shelves, running your finger over all the pristine condition books, each one woven in fabric with a hardback cover. “You’re staring again.” You say as you turn to Five, his eyes locking with yours.

“I just haven’t met anyone like you before.” You smile at his words before walking over to the table and placing your bag down. His eyes lingered for another few seconds before he jumped into life, confidently pulling out books from the shelves like he knew where they were from memory. “Alright, let’s do this.”

[fallingfor-fics]

Teachers Pet- chapter 68: Constance

All Chapters 

Chapter 67

"It really starts all the way back to your adolescence. When your father had first come to me regarding your family. The first thing he said to me, what was it," he tapped his chin, "Ah yes, something like, 'I need your help and Ill do anything for it.' he was a frightened little fellow back then. He said he'd gotten himself stuck in a deep hole of debt. Gambled it all away it seemed. And at the time I was in need of more people on my side, the right side." 

He paused, turning the story into a theatrical performance, I stayed silent, invested in knowing what happened and how I got tied into my Fathers affairs. "Offered him some money in exchange for his work. Thats all it was to start with. Then he reported back to me the two little girls who expressed some abilities that threatened our goal. You and your sister. Merely beginner witches but accelerating at great speed." I felt my eyes prickle at the mention of Connie and swallowed hard.

"Ill be honest Y/n your father was a weak man. Hunger driven, and submissive. He did anything I said in order for that monthly payment, sad thing addiction is. Anyways, he explained to me, your stubbornness and attitude and how you weren't as advanced in comparison to your sister. She peaked my interest first, so intelligent and talented, picking up things left and right. I wanted her, needed her for my cause. With a supernatural being like herself I would have been one step closer to my goal, would have taken on Dumbledore and the ministry sooner. Wiping the slate clean along with it, leaving only the truly powerful amongst us. Which was an interesting revelation to find out your bloods...impurity. Shocking to find such talented wizards that were mudbloods." I sat here taking in everything he was saying. Trying to keep myself from exploding with anger, and we haven't even gotten to the part that led us here. "And thats when it really got interesting, after lots of observations, I found your sister to not be a good fit, she was too weak minded, too kind for her own good, she would never be capable of hurting a thing, she had all the power but none of the drive, and it left me in a tough spot. But I stumbled upon this book here," he pulled out the familiar leather spellbook from thin air and opened it up to a bookmarked page.

"The curse of the wicked, such an interesting creation. I don't know who would have ever needed it, but it came in great use. I assume you didn't get to read very far ahead," he snickered looking up at me and my unamused face. "Allows a transference of power to a target of the casters choosing, power can be obtained from the caster themselves or can be power taken from another individual." he read aloud and I cringed at the sentence, fearing where the story might be going, "It was perfectly planned out, I knew it would take time, but I was ready to wait to ensure my success. And soon your father and I were planning your sister's demise. There was only one way to make the perfect wizard for the job, with your sisters abilities and your willpower and ambition, it worked out perfectly. So we got your father to lure her away, and I assure you it was as painless as possible." he said casually and at this point I felt my lip quiver, a hot tear rolling down my face.

I sat there contemplating my whole childhood, thinking about the years we'd been mourning her and it was all because of my idiot father. "We extracted her powers, saving them for the perfect day, and then im sure you know the rest." he finished looping his fingers together as he sat there casually. I wiped the silent tears that poured down from my eyes sniffling. I looked up at my father and he just looked away, "You coward." I sneered at him and he just stayed silent, "How could you do that to her? To your child?" I stood slowly and he just continued to ignore me, "Come one say something! I know you have to have something to say? A pathetic excuse? Or a snotty remark?!" I said, raising my voice at the man I once called Dad. "I will never understand nor forgive you for that, all these years you acted as if you felt even a smidge of remorse, but you don't. You're just a fucking psychopath with no morals." I quickly raised my wand and casted a swift spell out to him, Voldemort had no time to react before Quincy was being flown back into the wall. He got up pulling out his wand as well, the dark lord stayed seated, finding the altercation entertaining. I slung my wand once again, throwing an even more painful spell at him, he blocked it and I quickly threw another, striking his arm. He stumbled a bit and yelled as he casted one out towards me, I scoffed blocking it with ease. I saw Voldemort perk up out of the corner of my eye.

I raised my wand once more, and struck the old man on the leg this time, he had cuts bleeding from where I struck him and I develled in the sight of him wounded. He caught me off guard throwing a spell out and I blocked the main shock of it, getting clipped on my side. I looked down at the medium sized cut across my waist as the blood made its way through my shirt. "Bad move Father." I centered my energy and quickly felt the veins spread throughout my body, in a quick blink my father was being lifted in the air and tossed against the wall in full force. I smiled as I lowered my hand back down and looked to a dumbfounded Voldemort. He began clapping and stood quickly. "Magnificent!" he cheered and I heard Quincy groan from the side, still on the floor. He waved his hand and my father disappeared. "You are better than I expected. You're going to do great things for us. And to think this is only levels one or two." he grinned wide and I shook my head, "No I refuse, I'm not helping you!" I yelled and his smile faded as he stepped closer to me, I felt the needles poke at my skin from the hot pain of the curse, it grew more painful when in close proximity to its caster. "Look where you are Y/n. There's no backing out now, you're all mine."

I heard screams from down the hall and looked back at the man, "What about Harry, why did you take him?" I asked and he just snickered, "Thats between him and I, now why dont you get some rest." he grinned at me and I shook my head, "Fuck no im not tired, I dont want to stay here with you." He just shook his head at me and the doors behind me opened, the death eaters coming in once again and grabbing my arms, "Asshole cant even take care of me himself." I scoffed and he rolled his eyes at my comment, "You watch people are going to come for Harry and me, and they won't stop until they save us." I warned as I allowed the Death eaters to drag me away, knowing there was no use in fighting them. They tossed me into a room and I fell on my ass. I felt hands wrap around me to help me stand and saw Harry there, "My god are you ok?" I asked brushing his hair back and examining a cut across his face, he looked like he'd been jumped by wrestlers, "Yes I will be, are you?" he asked pointing down at my cut, "Its not as bad as it looks." I said lifting my shirt, but we both made a face looking at it. "Y/n I dont think thats nothing." he said worried, I looked back up at him and pulled my shirt back down, "No its fine really, what did they do with you?" I asked and he just sighed, "They just asked me a bunch of questions and kept trying to beat the answers out of me." he said wincing as he softly poked at his swollen cheek.

"Dracos is going to flip when he sees you." I said softly and he looked down, "We haven't spoken all spring break, not even a letter." he sighed and I shook my head, "im sure Lucius is just watching him like a hawk." he nodded and I looked around the room, there was a bathroom attached and two beds. No windows and the door was locked. I went into the bathroom as Harry went and sat on one of the beds. I shut the door and quickly lifted my shirt looking down at the cut, "Shit shit!" I cursed quietly to myself. He had struck me with something i'd never seen before. The once small cut had not stopped bleeding and several others were beginning to form around it, also bleeding uncontrollably. I waved my hand using every possible healing spell I knew and nothing worked. I felt my eyes water and I let out a shaky breath from the pain. I was finally getting my cursed veins to alleviate and now I was being sucked into a whirlpool or pain from this spell. I couldn't even remember at the moment what it was he called out before hitting me. I tore my undershirt and tied it tightly around my waist, gasping and biting down onto my knuckles from the tightening of the fabric around me. I let out shaky breaths, pulling my shirt back down and washing the blood from my hands.

Taglist; @lovelyhoneylemon @juliijah @lmao-liz

[thirsthourdemon]

Haikyuu boys and what gifts they would give you

Includes: Karasuno, Aoba Johsai, Nekoma, Shiratorizawa, Fukurodani, Inarizaki

A/N: Aha Aha Aha

Karasuno

Hinata: He would give you a rock that him and natsu painted on. On the rock there’s a silly face on it, from natsu, and then a volleyball, from hinata, then an I love you at the bottom part. He gave that to you when you guys went on a park date with natsu.

Kageyma: The first give he would have ever given you was a milk box and you were so happy because he never really shares his milk. This was actually how he confessed to you like he wrote “Want to go out with me?” Or something like that at the bottom. He was blushing the whole time.

Yamaguchi: This baby boy would give you his scarf and a warm drink because you were both walking home from school and it was really cold but you forgot your scarf at home so he just gave you his. He would blush whenever he sees you wearing it now.

Tsukkishima: Salty boy gave you a playlist ever since you told him what type of music you liked. He wouldnt give it to you right after making it though. He would have given in when you’re stressing out over homework or something like that and he’d just put it on speaker for you waiting for you to ask whose playlist that was.

Nishinoya: An ice cream stick. Why? You called him senpai the first time you met him and he just- He automatically fell in love and asked you to an ice cream “hang out” because it wasnt a date or anything! He was just being a good senpai. He confessed to you by making an ice cream stick and the stick had a heart carved into it.

Tanaka: You and him went to a matsuri, shrine festival, with the team. He decided that he was going to be a man and catch you some goldfish. It took him a while however but you still appreciated his victory even though he spent most of his money it. You named that single goldfish “Ryuu”.

Suga: It’s not technically a gift but he gave you a mechanical pencil with your name on it. He was supposed to keep it for himself but you were borrowing a mechanical pencil during lunch time and he just gave you his pencil case only late to realize that it was there. When you saw it oh boy were you confused. Ended up confessing to you that way.

Asahi: OH MY- He gave you a handmade hair tie. Like he saw how you were struggling with your hair so much so he just decides to make one but he didnt plant ahead on how he’d give it to you. He was forced by suga and daichi to give it to you but in the end noya did that because he was too nervous to even tell you. Noya just “Oh hey! Y/N! Asahi thought you might be having trouble with your hair! Here” and just gives it to you. Blushing mess.

Daichi: The traditional gift 😤 He gave you a response chocolate he made with suga during white day. You gave him chocolate during valentines and he responded by giving you chocolate gift back. He gave it to you after practice and though the chocolate was a bit soft now he still gave it because the effort? Not letting that go to waste!

Ennoshita: Another traditional man. You gave him chocolate and he didnt know what to do so he just...Huh? He gave you chocolates back and let’s just say things started from there on ❤️

Kiyoko: You were stuck in the friendzone for quite a time too. She gave you matching keychains for your bag but like...Yachi also has it. 😔

Yachi: 😳😳😳 She drew you once for “art class”. Baby didnt have “art class” but when it came out better than expected she gave it to you when she confessed along with a letter. Let’s be real she was blushing and saying sorry the whole time.

Im sorry, guys but Im a big yachi-stan. Yachi is THAT bitch for me.

Aoba Johsai

Oikawa Toru: He doesnt give you 1 or 2 no no...He gives you 5 service aces. Shows off in the game more when you’re watching and for Seijoh it’s a sure victory once he does his little service ritual for you.

Iwaizumi Hajime: One time you called oikawa “shittykawa” during class he instantly fell in love with your fierce attitude so he legit treated you good food after that time. It became a ritual for both of you to eat out whenever they one which was often. His comfort food cannot be complete without you eating it with him.

Mattsukawa issei: His horsecock. That shit is a gift in itself. A big gift in fact.

Kyoutani Kentarou: People may see him as a very scary person but he actually gave you a stuff toy you wanted at the arcade. He saw how you looked at it with such longing that one time and proceeded to get it for you whenever you werent around. It took him such a long time but gosh was it worth it to see you smiling like that.

Nekoma

Kuroo: This man gave you...A headache. No fr hahahaha he gave you a spike actually. The first time you watched him play in a game...mf told you that if he stomped twice then it was a spike for you. He actually did win the game with that one spike because nekoma was losing and team morale was low. The moment he spiked that ball with that subtle double stomp he managed to score and boost morale again.

Kenma: He always gives you gifts but more like...Health potions, resources you need, animal crossing gifts tbh 🥺. He didnt really give you much gifts physically but virtually? He would specifically go and get rare items in doubles just to give you the other one and say he “Accidentally got another one”.

Lev: Alisa’s cooking. You were both out during lunch time and he saw that you were only drinking something so he decided to feed you his sister’s bento for him. My baby is so sweet- and also headaches. He also gives you headaches.

Fukurodani

Bokuto: He gives you either his jersey OR a spike as well. Better yet he gives you his jersey for a game then does a spike for you. Bitch didnt even have a signal he legit shouted “That one was for you, Y/N!” And pointed at you. Kill me please- Needless to say everyone was looking at you so much.

Akaashi: You cant convince me he doesnt give you a copy of the book you wanted and were looking for. He just so happened to have it, yeah sure...🙃 Little did you know that he went all over miyagi for that fucking book. He probably gave you a bookmark along with it too. ❤️ Ya nerds

Date tech

Aone takanobu: Surprisingly enough he gave you a small vase for the flowers he gave you last time. He even told you how to preserve them more. He be teaching you all about plants whenever he you two go home together. He doesnt speak he just...gives you books or he shows you himself sometimes.

Futakuchi: He gave you his sour gummies 😖 TOO ADORABLE FUCK. You were staring at them and he just offered you some and now you’re in love.

Shiratorizawa

Ushijima: Waka baby gave you a service ace. He isnt one to give you anything big and he didnt know what to give you so he just gave you something he knows he could. Before the game itself he actually told you that he promised you a service ace the first time he would be given the chance. Volleyball Idiot 🥺

Tendou: MIRACLE BOY STRAIGHT UP GAVE YOU ONE OF HIS SHONEN JUMPS. He gave you the one that you really liked and said it was “Not a big deal”-It was a big deal considering how in love he is with them.

Goshiki: Im sorry but...good head. He gave you heavenly head. 😔 King of oral right here. No really hahahaha tsutomu probs gave you a shrine charm that says “absolute victory”. You keep that little charm whenever you watch his games now. Though you tell him that its the charm working he says you’re his actual lucky charm.

Inarizaki

Miya Atsumu: A migrane. His fangirls keep threatening you and you had to keep on telling them that you were just their team manager. He just- I mean I wanted to say he gave you a service ace but mf just gave you a migrane.

Miya Osamu: Unlike his brother this guy is actually pretty reasonable. As an asian you have no idea how happy your parents would be when this man gives you half a sack of rice. I know everyone expects the “Onigiri” answer but I enjoy being given a sack of rice more. 🍚

Aran Ojiro: I- IM SUCH A SIMP! He gave you his a batch of cookies. This headcanon is from @oof-she-needs-therapy by the way because I fell in love with their works so much. He just “Felt like he had to make an extra batch”. This boy 100% made that for you alone. Dont play me. He even fed you one and just to tease back you kissed the tips of his fingers. Practice that day was E V E N T FU L.

Taglist: @my-mass-hysteria @janellion

[blu-eh]

Danny Phantom Ao3 Fic Recs

i have absolutely nothing better to do than go through my bookmarks countless times so i figured i would share some lesser-know (sometimes) COMPLETE fics that i rlly enjoy reading when im perusing ao3 in search of content. this is ofc not all of them 

under keep reading bc its gonna be a Long Post probably 

Unearthed by Marsalias | 1 out of 3 works of the Exhumed series 

Something has been found that should not have been.

aka police find a body/half a body (dannys) in the woods. phantom says its his. Shit Goes Down as police assume hes been murdered and conduct a formal investigation and basically bite off more than they can chew.

Absurdism by DarkNymfa 

Absurdism: doctrine that we live in an irrational universe

Jazz is 14 years old, has no friends, and, oh yeah, she has ghost powers. And now, mere months after the accident that made her half-ghost, she meets someone like her.

darknymfa is a fantastic author w/ fantastic stories so be sure to CHECK THEM OUT but this is my all time favorite basically where canon danny gets stuck in a world where a younger jazz was turned into a halfa instead of him. doppelgänger shenanigans. danny as a teacher. We All Love A Good Dimension Travel Fic Here

Parental Woes by DarkNymfa 

Humans form families of flesh and blood, while ghosts form theirs based on connections in their cores. But what does that mean for a half-ghost?

clockwork and pandora see danny and are like. this is my child now. attempt to adopt despite danny still having human parents that he does actually consider family too. found family? normal family?? both at the same time??? 

Hitch-Hiker by cosmonaughtt

Danny's lost, thanks to the help of another ghost patrol gone wrong. Luckily he finds a kind driver who's willing to take him to the next town. But is this driver just as "normal" as he is?

STEVEN UNIVERSE x DP CROSSOVER THAT WE LOVE AND DESERVE 

Adoption by Marsalias

What, exactly, does ghost adoption entail?

clockwork takes in danny after dannys parents are uhhhhhhhh Not Good. lots of world building for ghost legal systems. danny deserves a hug (and gets one!) 

Shift by Alexa_Piper

It turns out that the views of Agents O and K are not held by the rest of the Guys in White... which they discover when they bring in a fourteen-year-old half-ghost kid for "painful experiments".

the giw seeing danny and his neglectful parents and are like: My Child Now. ft. danny getting the hugs he deserves 

That Razor's Edge by Fionn_Sgeul

Valerie's world was clear-cut and straightforward. Then came the night when everything she thought she knew came crashing down on her head … along with a few tons of pulverised building.

That was the night that she became the thing she feared … and discovered that maybe it wasn't a thing to be so frightened of.

And also, maybe it was finally, finally time to admit that Phantom wasn't such a bad guy after all.

HALFA VALERIE HALFA VALERIE HALFA VALERIE

what a teacher would do for a student by mageofmoonlight

Danny tensed, pulling his hands away from the bars of the cage, frost swirling at his fingertips, his core buzzing in his chest as he prepared to transform.

“Do not touch my students,” Mr. Lancer said.

There was a flash of light.

this fic and this concept is so underrated. i love it. i need a dozen more fics like this

Jumpsuiting To Conclusions by Kimcat

Jack and Maddie have finally managed to catch Phantom, and they can't help but take notice how similar his outfit is to their own.

Warnings: Mentions of drugs and blood

ofc.....good old parental identity reveal. this one is goodddddd

Real World Item by Marsalias

Danny Fenton shows up on ghost detectors when in the real world. What does Danny Phantom show up on in the Ghost Zone?

this is another one of those fics where its like i keep recc’ing this author because they DESERVE IT and are GOOD AT WRITING FICS and this fic is no exception. aka danny shows up on the real world item detector in phantom form and has some Explaining to do to his parents 

Dancing Around the Truth by Taliax 

The last thing Valerie wanted was to get caught up in Paulina’s plot to ask Phantom to the winter formal. Unfortunately Paulina’s made sure she doesn’t have a choice. Meanwhile, Danny just wants to finish his Algebra quiz.

i lvoe this fic smsmsdm sdjkgf WOW ok basically: paulina finds out valeries secret, valerie finds out dannys, paulina finds out dannys and its all one Mess of a situation 

Icebound by Pandemi

The Justice League gets their hands on a magic orb, but when it starts giving off emotions, they find that this is no ordinary magical object... in fact, it just might be sentient.

this is one of my first dp fics & all time favorite fics. a dc x dp crossover. danny gets trapped in his core, the justice league find & help him. then they adopt him (they dont but like they basically do)