#im sorry to everyone im posting so much ooc but i feel emotional and im trying to act before its Gone

[e-vay]

Evay QA Bulk Post 6

Here's another batch of questions.

Again, these do not include Domino or Phlox questions as I plan on addressing those in a separate post. Sorry for the delay on Phloxino questions, I just need to finish the final chapter of their story first.

Thank you all for reaching out ☺️

PERSONAL/MISC ASKS

toonfan91 asked: What is your favorite retro video game system, what would you say is your favorite retro game to play?

A: My favorite consoles would be the Super Nintendo, Gamecube, and the Gameboy Advance SP. Those are all so nostalgic for me and were integral to my childhood. I had the Sega Genesis as well but I didn't end up playing it nearly as much as the other 3. Top three of my favorite retro games would be Sonic 3 & Knuckles, Ms Pacman and Super Mario World.

Anon asked: omg! i wondered if cheese was just something you were super about in your teen years im so glad that cheese is still the #1 fave 🧀

A: Hahaha! Aww, you remembered that about me! Yes, I'm still a cheese fiend, forever and always!!!

Anon asked: Any writing tips and/or subversions on common tropes? - ✍🏻

A: I've said this before but I recommend really focusing on your character building. I personally believe if you can get the audience to care about your characters, the rest will work out. As far as subverting tropes, I'd just say don't default to what's easy. I remember writing a script in high school and it involved a "it was all a dream" ending and my teacher actually rolled his eyes at me and said "Don't do this to your audience. It's an easy out for you and a disservice to them" and that moment has stuck with me forever. So though I don't have exact advice for you, I'd just say keep your audience in mind. You want them to be happy that they read your story, not rolling their eyes. (You're a member of your audience too, so make sure you're happy with your story as well!)

Anon asked: Will your kid be named aroura?

A: Ever since I was a little girl, I always wanted to name my future daughter Aurora. Who knows if I'll ever have a kid and even if I do, I am not sure what their name will be. Aurora is definitely still one of my favorite names and I'd love to name my child that, but it will depend on what best fits that human :)

Anon asked: have you seen the until dawn remaster?? i know you did a drawing of that long ago!! have you ever drawn the actual characters? and also, how would you match the sonic characters to the until dawn characters? 😳?

A: I have seen the remaster but I haven't played it! It looks like such an improvement from what I've seen, and I honestly loved the original. I drew Ashley and Chris once, but for the life of me I can't find that file! It was so long ago, it probably wouldn't look any good now anyway haha. Hmm, it's a little hard matching Sonic characters to the Until Dawn characters without making them OOC. I guess if I had to pick, and with the caveat that this is a weird AU and characters are not 100% canon-accurate, I'd cast Amy as Sam (kind, gets along with everyone, doesn't like violence but can absolutely kick ass), Tails as Chris (because of his intelligence, his love for tech and his overall positive, good-natured spirit), Rouge as a mix of Jessica and Emily (covers the bases of intelligent, seductive, resourceful). I'm torn about casting Sonic as either Josh or Mike. Josh would of course be an unhinged version of Sonic which could be fun to explore but if you ignore the unhinged part, he still really suits Sonic as he is the core of the friend group and he is torn between fun-loving and masking his real emotions. Mike I feel like is a little more of the 'lead character' role that Sonic tends to fall into and his fear of commitment is pretty spot-on to our blue boy hahaha. Knuckles would be Matt because they're athletic and loyal. I'd probably choose Blaze for Ashley because of how polite and serious she can be, but I acknowledge it's not the best fit.

@bigklingy asked: Does your Lego Amy have a Sonic, like Duck Amy does? 

A: I don't own an official Sonic minifig yet. All I have is this cursed knockoff hahaha. One day she'll have a real Sonic for her to love.

-

MISC SONIC ASKS

Anon asked: What elements could the Sonic cast bend based on their unique traits?

A: Sonic would be air because he is the wind. Tails would be lightning due to his affiliation with technology. Knuckles would be earth, obvious reasons (though fire works too, especially if you take into consideration the flames of disaster haha). Amy would be fire, due to her passion and also if you read her fortune cards guide, she says her favorite of the elements in her deck is 'fire.'

Anon asked: Quick question, have you ever read the Archie comics? If so, what’s your opinion on scrouge?

A: I'm not a fan of either.

chrismantike asked: I’ve been seeing this debate a lot everywhere and I want your expert opinion on it. Since you do know about DBZ I was wondering if you think Sonic can actually beat Goku?

A: I'm always going to go with Sonic on this debate. He's defeated monsters, deities, A KILLER MOON?! He can defeat most enemies in his normal state but when he goes super, enemies don't stand a chance. Meanwhile how many times does Goku need to 'level up' his Super Saiyan form just to fight an enemy? (this is all in jest of course) Hedgehog wins.

Anon asked: do you like team chaotix? If so, who’s your favorite character??

A: Team Chaotix is not my favorite group haha. If I had to choose a favorite amongst them, it'd be Espio. I think he's funny even when he's not trying to be.

whiteghos asked: Can you summarize (if you can) what happened in TEIU by Kbspeeding? I wanted to know what happened before lil’ rory and Shadow got all dirty and beat up and what happened during that chapter. I really wanted to read it so if you can that’ll be great!?

A: I sincerely wish I could, but "The Evil In Us" was so long ago that I don't remember the details well, and KB deleted her account and all of the pages of her fic with it, so I haven't been able to reference it in ages. I'm sorry I couldn't be of more help.

Anon asked: How would you imagine Amy in her teen years? -✍🏻

A: I already picture Amy as we know her as a teenage Amy. Especially her in Sonic Boom, I think that's a teenage/young adult Amy.

-

MY OCs/AU ASKS

Anon asked: I have this question on my mind for awhile now, how did you make or come up with and Amy’s and Aurora’s clothes designs? They are amazing ☺️☺️

A: Well that's an incredibly kind thing for you to say! I honestly don't feel like I did that great of a job with Amy, I just put her in clothes I'd like to see her in haha. I wish I had put more thought into her outfit but I can always redesign in the future. With Aurora (and any of my OCs, really) I just experiment with things until I figure out what works. I try to first get into the mindset of the character and determine what fashion trend best suits their personality, and then I'll do research on that style and then try to come up with something based on that. Aurora's style is on the spectrum of "Eclectic" and "Fun" and "Funky" fashion trends, so her outfits are based on that. If you're curious, I have a whole Pinterest board dedicated to my AU and there are sections for the different characters' fashion!

Anon asked: Are you going to make more ship/fan children one day, or will you just stick with Tumble, Ruff, & Aurora??

A: Methinks you've forgotten the other 8 fankids I've made! But that's okay 😜 I love creating characters and I have no plans on stopping that any time soon. That could be OCs that aren't related to anyone, OCs that are the parents of characters we know, or fan children. I don't know what I'll be doing next, but there will definitely be more new characters in the future.

charlieangel345 asked: Hey, evay, What do you think Amy and Aurora’s favorite anime? I think Amy’s favorite anime is fruit basket and Aurora favorite anime is sailor moon.

A: I think you're absolutely right! :) I think Amy might also be a fan of Ranma 1/2 as well. I'm not all that current with anime so I can't make many more recommendations that suit them.

supersaiyaman85 asked: How do you think it would go down if CC ever met Cream or Zooey(Tail's crush from Sonic Boom)?

A: I have a script for a comic that involves CC and Cream interacting, I just have to get around to drawing it. As far as Tails' past crushes like Zooey, CC is very jealous so ... she wouldn't handle it well lol

twistedchaos101 asked: Does Aurora know her grandparents? How is the relationship with them?

A: At this time, Sonic does not know Phlox is his dad and Domino is deceased, so to their knowledge Aurora does not have grandparents on her dad's side. Aurora would know her Grandma Lulu and Grandpa Clay, but Amy is sort of estranged from them so they aren't a major part of her life. They're the kind of grandparents that send a ton of gifts on holidays and birthdays but only visit maybe once ever few years. She loves getting to see them though and they absolutely adore her!

abbysulf asked: Has there ever been a moment where Sonic went dark to save Aurora? Like, was she in so much danger that he would risk his mind and body to save her? And not from Shadow lol

A: In my AU's canon, there hasn't been any moments like that. I like to joke about Sonic turning dark any time he's even mildly upset, but I don't mean it seriously. And as Aurora was growing up, he kept Aurora so safe to the point it was almost smothering, so she wouldn't have ever been in any real danger. But if she were to ever have her life threatened, yes he would lose himself in order to protect her, without hesitation.

Anon asked: We all know Sonic and the gang for saving the world in their world and they have alot of fans but what about in your story? Are they famous and their fans are surprised when they heard that Sonic and Amy got together and had a child same with Rouge and Knuckles but they adopted instead?

A: Even in my AU, Team Sonic is famous. Not to the point where they're like celebrities and have paparazzi following them everywhere, but the average citizen knows who the members of Team Sonic are and some people do get kind of starstruck around them. As they all reach older adulthood, Sonic and Amy's lives get a little more calm and domestic so they are less in the spotlight compared to Tails who is the CEO of his own company and Knuckles who is running the Young Heroes program. Maybe the average person might be surprised that some of their heroes ended up getting married and having their own families, but again I don't picture Team Sonic's personal lives in tabloids regularly.

Anon asked: I actually wanna know how well Aurora takes shots (At the doctors)from a baby all the way up to a young adult

A: Aurora sure wouldn't like shots, but she's never necessarily been scared of getting them. If anything, I could see the DOCTOR being more afraid of giving her a shot. Imagine both Sonic and Amy giving the doctor the death glare with the unspoken threat of "You better get this done quick and if you cause any extra unnecessary pain, we will both end you." They've got a good routine down where Sonic distracts baby/toddler Aurora until the shot happens and then both he and Amy quickly smother her in hugs and kisses and praises so she is only upset for a brief moment.

*The next question is a Shadora Ask. Skip if you don’t like Shadora

Anon asked: Why does Sonic spy on Shadow and Aurora when they go on a date or when Aurora visits Shadow's house?

A: Sonic is an overprotective dad and he doesn't like the idea of Aurora dating anybody (even though she's a grownup). It doesn't matter who she was dating, he doesn't think anybody is good enough for his baby girl. He spies to make sure they're not getting into trouble (it's just for the sake of comedy, don't take it too seriously).

*The next question is a Shadora Ask. Skip if you don’t like Shadora

djanims asked: maybe weird question but has aurora ever seen shadow in his super form and if not what was her reaction?

A: She has! I've drawn them together in their super forms before :) She thinks he's an angel

*The next question is a Shadora Ask. Skip if you don’t like Shadora

Anon asked: Has Shadow told Aurora about who Maria was in your continuity?

A: Absolutely. Maria played a very important role in his life, so of course he'd talk about her. The grief will always be there but with time and by becoming more comfortable opening up to Aurora, he finds it easier to reminisce on the good times he had with his sister.

*The next question is a Shadora Ask. Skip if you don’t like Shadora

Anon asked: How did Sonic and Amy react to Aurora and Shadow having 8 children like I just imagine *first born* "Oh my goodness congratulations!" second born still happy. At the 8th their like "Wow... Rory that's um great... Lots of grandkids.." So yes that's how I imagine it going but how about you, this question has really taken over my mind. 🤣❤️❤️

A: Hehehe, 8 grandchildren is definitely a lot. BUT! I headcanon that Mobians are a bit more like animals than humans are, so the idea of 'litters' isn't totally foreign (though maybe not as common in modern day Mobius). In my AU, Shadow and Aurora have three litters (so far, hehehe) so it went 3 kids, 2 kids, 3 kids, so they weren't exactly expecting to end up with 8 children, but they're happy all the same. I think Amy would be over the moon no matter what. Sonic would love all his grandkids and be excited about all of them, but also I'm sure he'd be secretly laughing it up at how chaotic the Shadora Home must be at all times and he's just glad that he and Amy had it super easy raising their only child. Plus I could see among friends and family there's an ongoing joke of "So... Aurora, Shadow.... How many next time?"

-

SHIPPING ASKS

kkrucy asked: What your opinion on other ships then sonamy?

A: There are plenty of ships that I like and there are plenty that are not for me. I don't like to announce the ships I don't like, there's no good in doing that. Some that I like include (but are not limited to) KnucklesXRouge, Shadamy, Sonadow, SonAmyShad, MetAmy, VectorXEspio, KnucklesXAriem, RougeXTopaz, WhisperXTangle, Dr.RobotnikXAgentStone (from the movies), SilverXBlaze, I even like BlazeXRouge if I'm being honest (You can blame TMOSTH for that!)

scaredforcewielder asked: I know it's a bit early, but would you consider doing Sonic and Amy's first Christmas as a couple?

A: I know I did it off-season, but I already made a several Sonamy comics for Christmas this year. I always want to draw more Sonamy and I would love to draw their first Christmas as a couple, but honestly I don't know that I'll have the time to do that this year. I hope those mistletoe comics helped to tide you over!

dean-alice-rose asked: What is your favorite sonmy moment? And it can be in your comics or official. Also what is your favorite comic that you made?

A: Gosh, it's really difficult to pick a single favorite Sonamy moment! If I had to narrow it down to just a few... One would definitely be episode 52 of Sonic X where Sonic returns to their planet and he and Amy have that heart to heart. I can't tell you how many times I've watched that scene, I found it to be the epitome of romance even as a kid! A small moment that actually meant a huge deal to me was in The Murder of Sonic the Hedgehog, where Sonic calls Amy "radiant." It's just one line, but wow, what a magnificent compliment! That's way more powerful than simply calling someone 'pretty' or 'great' in my opinion. I have too many favorites, I could go on forever haha! I don't really have a favorite comic that I made, they all mean a lot to me. "My Gal" is maybe what I'm most known for and that's great because it was so personal and I poured SO MUCH of my heart into it. But I have fond memories of every single comic I've made and each one has helped better my writing and drawing, so they're all special to me no matter how silly or serious they are.

Anon asked: In the future, would there be a chance to see CC and Tails again? I always adored CC and loved her design, plus her relationship with Tails. I was just curious as to if you had any future plans for them?

A: Definitely! I have plenty of ideas for them, I just need to dedicate the time to drawing it out. I'm so happy you enjoy that pair so much!

Anon asked: What are your thoughts on Metamy? (´▽`ʃ♡ƪ)

A: I ship it! It's not at the top of my list but I still think it's super cute and no matter what, I've always had the headcanon that Metal has feelings for Amy (he's meant to be like Sonic, after all, so if I believe Sonic likes Amy then surely Metal would, too!)

Anon asked: Do you ever compare video game couples to each other? - ✍🏻?

A: Of course, it'd be impossible not to. Personally I relate Sonamy to NathanDrakeXElenaFisher (Uncharted) the most out of all video game couples. Both pairs have an undying love for adventure and enjoy traveling the world. Elena/Amy are definitely more cautious and careful than Nathan/Sonic who're a little more gung-ho, but in the end they make a great team and can keep up with one another.

whiteghos asked: What is Sonamy’s love language? >v< <3

A: I always say that Amy is the physical embodiment of love, and because of that I think ALL the love languages suit her! She expresses her love in every way possible and I'm sure she'd be happy to receive it in any way Sonic is willing to give it 🥰 It makes sense to me that Sonic's would be Quality Time and Acts of Service. Sonic always loves to do his own thing, so whenever he's willing to spend his time with Amy (whether it's grabbing dinner with her or even if it's just sitting in a pile of hay with her), I think that says a LOT. I don't think Acts of Service requires explanation.

*The next question is a Shadora Ask. Skip if you don’t like Shadora

whiteghos asked: What is Shadora’s love language? >v< <3

A: This is hard to narrow down and I feel like love languages fluctuate. For now, I'd say they both share the love language of Physical Touch. Individually, Aurora leans more towards Words of Affirmation and Shadow is Acts of Service.

*The next question is a Shadora Ask. Skip if you don’t like Shadora

Anon asked: Are you gonna make a full comic on Shadow and Aurora first date like you did with Sonic and Amy?

A: I'm not 100% sure if it will become a comic. I definitely have a fic in mind, and maybe I'll do some supplemental drawings to go along with it. Sonic and Amy's first date was 'easier' because Sonic and Amy already have an established history. Shadow and Aurora have to get to know each other before they start dating, so it'd be easier to accomplish in a fic rather than a comic. If you haven't seen it already, I did write a summary of their first date.

–

Thank you all for the questions!

Evay QA Bulk Post 1

Evay QA Bulk Post 2

Evay QA Bulk Post 3

Evay QA Bulk Post 4

Evay QA Bulk Post 5

[robotnuts]

heres my bitching post sorry

the main thing i didnt like was how they treated grif's character. he was so angry and i feel like some of his character got leeched out to simmons. for a season that tried to call back so much to the original, that even tried to even out the great destroyer plotline from BGC that didn't make any sense, i wish they handled grif's character with more care. like a red team member manipulating sarge to do what they want is GRIF'S mo, not simmons, and i wish grif had been the one to rally and convince sarge to come help caboose instead of simmons. i feel like the grimmons breakup was the emotional scene that hit the least for me i didnt cry about it i only started crying when the credits rolled, and thats because grif felt pretty ooc for me. which sucks as a grifhead but what can you do

similarly theres kind of a weird abuse apologia thing going on where its like. im fine with how sarge treats grif because it's so clearly like water off a duck's back and grif just manipulates sarge to get his way and rolls his eyes at him and doesnt give a fuck throguhout seasons 1-10, i can take it just as a fictionalized comedy duo that isn't taking itself seriously and grif isn't actually 1:1 like a soldier being abused by his superior irl. and then shisno had the problem of making grif go "actually this really hurts my self esteem and makes me feel bad" and makes you retroactively view their dynamic in a different light. this isnt as bad as shisno, but having sarge say "i was only hard on you because i wanted to push you to be better" made me like :/ because. yknow. if we're taking it seriously, the fact that sarge was "psuhing" grif doesnt make his treatment okay. what makes his treatment okay is that theyre wacky halo man characters and obviosuly there has to be a crazy sargeant character and its not really bothering grif that much. but :/ very minor but i thoguht id mention it

um um um. tex coming back was incredible and made me scream i knew she was gonna come back i was spoiled but i didnt expect how theyd do it. really good. they got me again with the fucking chex at the end of course they did!!!!!!!!

oh right biching. um. what the fuck was going on with wash honestly LMAO like him having his fuckign DID and talkign about his memory issues was completely made for me but his role in this season was so funny and strange WHY DOES HE HAVE A DOC TULPA OH MY GODDDD. like in my ideal world of a final season it absoltuely would have had a more filled out cast and wash and carolina woul dhave been part of the reds and blues the whole time because i want this to be my sitcom where everyone is friends forever but like. I do understand why burnie wanted to take down the cast to sarge/grif/simmons/caboose as the original four founders (rip joel LMAO).

also the stuff with tucker was so scary !!! ahhhHhh why did they send him to time prison for 10 years AHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!! SCARY!!!!!!!!!!!

idk ill also update this post with stuff that i loved it was really funny and i did like it overall, i need to watch it again i was tipsy/drunk for most of it and also talking about it irl so i missed some bits that my friends went crazy for and i need to watch the commentary. its not all bitching thats just waht sticks in my mind easier. god that campfire scene with the barenaked ladies song i was CRYINGGGG. it obviously felt short/rushed or whatever but like. ugh. its just a potential possible future anyways you guys KNOW in my head all the reds and blues are together on chorus forever and ever always doing their bits. i really am just glad we got more of it to watch together and got to get on burnie's wild ride one last time. thank you

[my-amygdala-is-synthetic]

okay I'm spewing my thoughts into a text post (there sure are a lot of them)

like I said I had seen almost ZERO spoilers for this movie, somehow, I was going in blind and that made it SUCH a treat. the only spoilers I knew were that Ned Does Magic and the other spidermen + Otto were there. I didn't even know about the villains, I figured Norman shows up but I deadass thought it would be like, a cameo

anyways lets start out with why it sucked

No Way Home is... not a good movie. it is objectively a pretty bad movie, in fact. there is zero substance beyond pandering fanservice.

and even then. the fanservice is kind of bad! everyone is painfully out of character! it is so obvious that they all just showed up for a disney paycheck. it hurts my heart to hear Alfred Molina doing mcu quips. the "throwback lines" were stupid asf I groaned out loud every time except when Tobey said mY bAcK but sorry im a simp

I think Flint Marco was the most in character but even then he had some questionable writing. yassified Electro was so fucking funny, I can't even complain about his glowup, Jamie Foxx rly said yeah I'll be in the movie but you gotta right some wrongs. I respect that

I have never like Doctor Strange, Benderbump Cumdumpass has SUCH A HORRIBLE american accent it pisses me off so badly. and why was he so smooth in this? he looked like he was from a video game? it was very odd. thankfully he wasn't in it as much as I feared, and he had like two lines that made me giggle so I'll accept it

Marvel movies have set feminism back by 30 years on god. there's no reason for there to be only three women in a cast this size. Zendaya at least had better characterization in this than in HC/FFH. but mcu Aunt May is done so dirty. it is legitimately offensive how she's made into a one-note AUNT MAY IS HOT NOW joke. the purpose of her character is supposed to be Peter's rock to rely on. they did not lean to that dynamic enough and it made her death so much less impactful, I kinda dgaf about it honestly! I thought Gwen's death was more emotional and I despised TASM2!

the action was not good, poorly choreographed, very boring, CGI :/

ALL THAT ASIDE, THE SHIT I LIKED!!!

because YES, it is a bad movie, BUT FUCK THAT WAS SUCH A FUN THEATER EXPERIENCE, not QUITE as much fun as I had in the theater with Spiderman 3, but such a cool vibe that I haven't felt since Endgame (sorry to be marvel's little bitch but yeah seeing that movie opening night was one of the coolest things ever)

Peter/Ned/MJ are such a cute polycule, sure it's no raimiverse throuple but who could ever live up to that.

when Connors was like "THAT'S his gf???" I laughed so hard cus I am also constantly wondering how Tom pulled her

I would also jump off the statue of liberty to save Zendaya, I really liked that Garf got to catch her I may have cheered

the old man yaoi with Otto and Norman was fun, I get why everyone ships them now, not quite my bag but I do see the appeal.

getting any reference at all to Harry was such a treat. I really thought they were just gonna pretend he didn't exist lol. fuck janco I hope he rots but it's for the best... mcu would have massacred his character. that being said "I had a best friend once, he died in my arms after he tried to kill me" I was simultaneously bursting into tears and laughing my ass off

WHERE THE FUCK WAS DANE DEHAAN THO... HELLO. I actually liked his version of Harry sorry!!

so at first I thought that the other Peters were also kind of ooc, Garf and Tobey should NOT be speaking in complete sentences!! but I thought about it and I think that actually they do feel like more matured versions of their characters.

the Mary Jane reference was nice but wow you really couldn't have Kirsten Dunst show up for just a second :( pay her some RESPECT as the first mistreated marvel girlie...

and the spideycest... WELL... I'm not going to draw yaoi of the three peters, I'm not, I'M NOT, but, I'd be lying if I said I wasn't tempted. lol. I gave this movie 3 stars on letterboxd and it would have been FUCKING TWO if it was not for the webshooter discussion. that was insane. that was out of pocket. that was beautiful and brave and they did that for the freaks like me out there.

anyways that was so much fun, I got so tipsed off canned cocktails and I did cry ONE tear at the end and I am extra sad that it's all over, I wish I could go see all the Spidermans in theaters again, this has made my fucking year and I'm so glad I did this!

^Ten times I saw the Bad Boys Ride Or Die trailer. I can recite that mf from memory now.

Now it is time to draw weird things yay bye. sorry if you read all this lol.

GUYS IM IN THE THEATER RIGHT NOW TO SEE NO WAY HOME FOR THE FIRST TIME

I have a feeling I won't like it I'm gonna be booing Doctor Strange and I'm only here for Tobey

[hereliesbitches--me]

God, do you know what the best feeling in the world is?

When your rp partners create big worlds and story lines and don't forget you..

When they mention your muse and make an effort to involve you within a thread and you're just..

Gosh, I'm just experiencing this fluctuation if emotions and I dunno whether it's because I'm sad or happy, but to counteract that, I wanna spread positivity to those people that make this rp place feel okay for me. And I'll tag it by verse with the people involved. Sorry for any of ya’ll who were repeated but yall just so important.

■ Skellig Family ■

•@ex-mercenary @bladeofthehawk @burmecias-protector @fcllenstcr @white-hawk @celestialspitfire

So, Berserk was my very first Fandom when I got here. I was like..16 years old and just discovered Tumblr, and here the little person I was went looking for friends and tried to impress just to belong. And you all let me in. Its been almost 4 years and we’ve stuck it through hell together, even when it had its ups and downs. People like you guys made it feel homely, and we created one hell of a story with all sorts of dynamics, even if Miurah is falling behind.

It feels good belonging somewhere, and I have all you guys to thank for my growth as both a writer and a person. Rosie has come a long way thanks to many of you, and ya’ll saw her in her ugly duckling stage as a character too. Thanks for not throwing me to the wolves <3

■ Modern Verse Family ■

• @draconicmatriarch @earthlyspirxts

April, you were my first friend here on Tumblr. We started in Berserk, but man have we gone a long way. Kia and Rosie have gone a long way.. and you have so much life and potential in Kia, im grateful to even be a part of it and bask in her glory as a character and a world.  And Zed, while we have only just met, you’re a damn cool person. 

This verse has been an emotional roller coaster and fucking murders me but still, even as a new verse, Its coming along so damn well. And I wanna thank you both for letting me join the nightmare story of a ship between Kia and Souther so I can fucking die by the end.

■ Rosieverse ■

▪@faircstcfall @mordorslord

Mits, my boy, the real mvp that always makes the effort to bring me in no matter the muse. You’re the real mvp, and Honestly I appreciate that so much. You put such a bug effort to involve and write with me, even if im slow as fuck, and just..I said it before, but thank you. It means the goddamn world to me and you have no idea. You even coined the name of this verse after Rosie and used concepts of mine to write Sauron, and that felt so damn good.

Ophelia, my angel, we’ve only just met through this verse and its gonna be one hell of a ride, but you’re such a sweet and talented writer. Breathing a breath of life I didn’t give a second glance to up until you came along. This is gonna be so fun, and thank you for taking interest in Rosie.

■ Pokeverse ■

▪@skulldxddy @maxskulline

To Tris and Mary, never in my life did I ever actually think my ass would get into pokemon until you shmucks came along. From Guts and Casca, to Guzma and Max. Im so damn grateful for the two of you willing to take me along for a fresh new adventure in a world I never even knew past Diamond and Pearl gen. You two are two people i’ve always loved and admired, and helped support me in hard times. 

Damn do I look forward to our future endeavors in a new fandom.  Thanks for taking me with you 

■ Original Verse ■

▪@thewhitepoison

This motherfucker and your bigass cuban nose, what can I even say about you? Been friends for too damn, you steal my fuckin birthday and we share a world and shit.  Biggest pain in the ass in the world, but it don’t change that you’re one of my good friends 

and We’ve created a whole world together that everyone is gonna know one day. Thank you, bitch, for putting up with my ice queen ass and sticking it through to make something iconic. Your royal pains are an extension of the world and this too is gonna be a journey.

Thank you very much, Monkey face.

- @doctor-2-insane-andfriends

Lucas, I could never forget you. Its thanks to you that I could even evolve the Moon concept and put it to use.  You’re a gifted writer with incredible concepts for eldritch horrors that needs to be appreciated more. Those sick fucks called deacons are now Rosie’s monster children and you can’t tell mem otherwise.

You’re incredible, and I hope you never let anyone, or life, let you think otherwise. Keep up all the great work, man, you’ll go far.

  Most importantly of all, in the list of all these people, is

@osteum

My best of Friends, my ray of sunshine , my other half, just what would I do without you? Avert thine eyes if you’re not prepared for some sappy love shit cuz im about to go to town.

You and I have been friends for almost going on 2 years now.. You were my Guts, my Ruvik, and now you’re my Eddie. You and I have had a real rough patch lately but im glad where we are. Came back stronger, and I wouldn’t change it for the world.  It’s thanks to you that I've really expanded with Rosie and an assortment of verses.. We’ve made a lot of stories no one knows about, and we don’t do much writing here, but I got you on other places and it still means the world to me <3

I hate being without you, man. I can’t do that anymore at this point, so this is my public appreciation of the best boy in the world whom I love so very much.

Thanks for staying with me and not getting bored or thinking im bland. Thanks for giving a shit about Rosie and her world.. It means more than you can imagine. Eddie and all your muses mean so much to Rosie, and I still hope they can be as iconic together as Guts and Rosie were <3

As for everyone else.. 

         Thank you 

Thank you for reading my shit, Thanks for showing any interest in me at all, and I hope to have the chance to write with as many people as possible. Thank you all for making me feel worth while!!

[imxthexhandler]

OOC: I’m sorry I haven’t been on here. Been stressed with the holidays, with family coming over to visit and cleaning, and just...adjusting still to the news from this post.

As I talked about with my therapist, it is a weird juxtaposition of emotions I’ve been dealing with for the past two weeks.

So yeah, guests staying over this weekend starting tomorrow, so much more cleaning is needed. And now, my brother has volunteered our home to host Thanksgiving. WHY? I mean, okay, it’s fine, but I’d like more than a less-than-two-week notice.

Pile on that I’ve been participating in NaNoWriMo this year (not well, mind you, but still writing), and I’ve been drained. I’m sorry. If I have forgotten to reply to an IM, this is why. I will try to reply to all my messages today.

As far as actual writing, that might not be till this weekend. It’s just going to depend on how my body is feeling.

(At least the doggos are coming over, so I get pupper cuddles, I hope. It’s my first time meeting Duke and Aspen. If nothing else, I’m hoping this will help convince my brother of “hey let’s get a dog next year”.)

Everyone please take care of yourselves, drink water, take your meds, get some sleep, eat something, and stay warm. Don’t forget to love each other.

[tobi-momo]

The Third Set

PAIRING: Tsukishima Kei x Reader

GENRE: Romance | Pining | Fluff | A lil crack (kinda)

WARNINGS: not proofread | a lil ooc and soft at the end (pls dont get mad at me 😭😭)

WORD COUNT: 1k+

A/N: hihihi ok so this idea literally came to me while reading another fic (i cant remember it now im super sorry) and it wouldnt leave my head so i couldnt NOT write it yk? pls keep in mind that it gets rlly soft at the end and really out of character😭 i just hc that does affectionate things during an adrenaline rush, like he's too hyped to care ab what going on around him he just wants to see you, and so this is basically where that came from kasjkhasd- also this is not meant to be spicy at all whatsoever (although some remarks from the others are made that way when you read) its supposed to be romantic and lighthearted, so pls dont think its that sexual😭 also thank you @awmahleebkg my wife for giving me the confidence to post this i love you baby <333

Watching Kei play was one of your favorite things to do. Sure, that might sound a little sad, but watching him and his team working together on the court was something that you wouldn't miss the world for. Until an away game came along, it taking place somewhere farther than they usually are, and since you weren't a part of the team, you couldn't take the school bus with them. So, you took the city bus. He might have told you not to, he might have told you to wait at your house for him to return and tell you about it, but you couldn't help it. This was an important game, and you needed to be there and support him.

He was nervous, although someone who didn't know as well as you wouldn't be able to tell, you were always able to see right through him. Always able to tell when he was nervous or scared, even intimidated. He found it annoying, that you were always there for him, confused as to why you dedicated your time for him, but years after your first meeting he realized that he would do the same for you. You didn't know that his heartbeat the same way for you as it did for him, and he sure as hell didn't know that the reason you stuck by him all these years was to feel that exact heartbeat next to yours.

[3:37 P.M.]

Kei <3: Stay home, y/n

Y/n: but it's an important game! i want to cheer you on!

Kei <3: I'll tell you what happens after I get home if you really want me to. But stop whining at me it's annoying.

Y/n: 😠😠 let. me. go.

Kei <3: No.

Y/n: i hate you so much

Kei <3: Sure you do

You wouldn't listen to him, of course. Why would you? You get your bag ready to leave, filling it with snacks and water bottles to help the team out.

By the time you snuck in, it was half-way past the second set. Tensions were high and sweat was dripping off their jaws while they gain each point. You made sure to stay a little quieter, not wanting Kei's attention to be drifted away from the game, especially since you weren't supposed to be there. By the time they won that set, they were tied with the other team. One more set left, things are getting really heated.

The score remained close to each other throughout the game, Karasuno being two points away from a win with their opponent three points behind them. Watching Kei as he looks at the floor with frustrated eyes, obviously mad at himself for not doing better. He frowns, taking a sip of water so no one sees it. You can see a slight tint of fear in his eyes- he was scared of losing the set. Although all you've seen were blocks of perfection, even a couple spikes that hit the court floor aggressively, points going towards Karasuno once more, he thought he wasn't doing good enough. You knew he was amazing, everyone in the room knew it too, so why didn't he?

He jogs back on the court after a timeout from the other team, getting into a serve/receive position, waiting for the ball to come over the net. The server on the other team hit the ball over, sending it straight to Nishinoya, who receives the ball perfectly, passing it to Kageyama. Backing up into the set, Hinata runs behind Kageyama, surprising the blockers on the other side of the net when Hinata smacks the floating ball down with his might. Instead of the ball hitting the floor, the left-back position receives the ball at the seam, shanking it towards the audience.

Another point.

The crowd goes wild and the air tightens as the scoreboard raises. You bounce on the bleachers and stomp your feet in excitement, knowing that this match would be over soon.

Kei exhales sharply at the whistle, relief, and nervousness seeping out of him. He can do it, he thought. Only one more point. When the ball passes him to the other side of the court, quickly moves to the right side of the net, jumping and completely regretting his decision once the ball hits the floor. He watches the ball trail off in shock, the whistle suddenly getting too loud for him. He grits his teeth in defeat, thinking that it would be over for them. His head faces the ground, his hands are balled up in fists. That's when you decide to take initiative.

Inhaling a harsh breath, you stand up putting your hands on each side of your face before yelling out to him.

"TSUKISHIMA KEI!!!"

His head whips from the floor, his eyes widening once they find yours in the big crowd. You stand out- to him at least.

"DON'T GIVE UP!!! YOU GOT THIS!! LET'S GO!!"

His pupils dilate at your figure cheering him on, suddenly wishing he hadn't told you to stay home. He didn't know you were there, or how you get here in the first place, but he was glad you came. He wanted you there. His shocked expression turned into a smirk of confidence before he turns back around and goes to his position. The whistle blows once more, telling the server that they can go. He refocuses on the court, watching the ball and everyone near it, analyzing everyone's movements and predicting where the ball is going to go. The big spiker on the other team runs towards the net with his approach, swinging his arms back, ready to slam the ball down as Kei quickly beats him to it, jumping and raising his arms on top of the net in defense.

The ball smacks the floor of the court.

Kei's eyes glow when his feet touch the ground again.

They won.

He tries his best to catch his breath, heaving once his teammates trample him on the ground. You scream in victory, jumping up and down, sprinting down the bleachers to the team, them welcoming you with tight hugs and cries of joy. Electricity coursed through Kei's veins, adrenaline making his sight clearer, his hearing less muffled and his breathing a lot clearer.

You see Kei on the other side of the court, getting up and steadying himself on his feet once you two lock eyes. You run towards him with a fast pace, him reciprocating as his legs speed up toward you. You jump on him, clinging to him as much as you could when wrapping your legs around him, digging your head in his shoulder. His hand immediately grab the back of your thighs for support, helping your body balance on his while you tug on his neck.

You praise him, telling him how proud you were of him picking himself up and being the best, telling him how amazing his blocks and spikes were, how amazing he was. You could hear his breathless laughs of joy, a genuine smile painting his face when you subconsciously pepper his face in firm pecks from your lips, showering him in sweet affection for his win.

"YOU DID SO AMAZING KEI!! I CAN'T BELIEVE IT!! THAT WAS SO COOL!! YOU SHOULDA SEEN YOURSELF OUT THERE! OH MY GOD THAT WAS- THAT WAS PERFECT!! I KNOW YOU WERE DOUBTING YOURSELF A LITTLE BIT BUT YOU WERE AMAZING THE WHOLE TIME I MEAN-"

Your words muffle when his lips crash onto your- a rough, exciting kiss that has you moaning in his mouth from surprise and desperation from wanting this for the longest time. Your hands slide up from his neck to his cheeks, palming them and pulling him closer while your lips disconnect and reconnect rapidly, not being able to get enough of each other. His hands subtly, but firmly squeeze your thighs while you tilt your head, giving him the chance to kiss you deeper. The amount of emotion going through your bodies, desperation, love, excitement, impatience, relief, mixing with the adrenaline in your system's causing your worlds to finally collide and mix.

"What are they doing?"

"I don't know but I feel like I'm interrupting something"

"I think they're the ones interrupting"

"Just let them have this one, guys"

"They are literally about to do it on the court how am I not supposed to feel uncomfortable, Suga-san?"

"Aw, these lovebirds are finally getting together, I knew it would happen"

"Liar, you bet they wouldn't!"

"Tanaka-san! You weren't supposed to say anything!"

You couldn't hear any of the banter in the background, your only focus was him, and his only focus was you. And all the team could do was watch.

pls i know this was rlly ooc im super sorry

taglist: @combat-wombatus @hitosushi @toosharkinternet @alpha3113 @flattykawadoorusmilkbread @solar3lunar @zerohawks @katsuhera

[volfoss]

ships to rate: bruabba and gyjo? maybe even yasugap if you're up for it

ok ur about to see such a long post its nto even gonna be funny, tldr i love them all

also gonna put a fic i really like for them if ive read one/ a fic idea i wanna write plus maybe ranting, this is not coherent but my spelling isnt too bad

post under cut bc its very long

Bruabba:

my loves my lifes

they r so soft for each other

the fucking rain scene when bruno extends his umbrella

and how bruno is like trying to hold back his emotions post abba dying

in case its not super obvious by the sheer volume of bruabba content i reblog this is one of my otps

ALSO the fucking boat scene where abba pretty much is like yeah ur home bruno

ajdskjghdsgjk

hc that they r meeting up in the afterlife w nara and having a good time (also read a phenomenal fic about it that ill link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/33118039 it is emotionally fucking me up days later <3)

dads dads dads but bruno is the caring dad that just gets you and takes care of you in the most gentle way and will sacrifice himself over and over again to see u happy and abba is the sitting in the armchair and u sneak in like 2 minutes past ur curfew ur busted but i was also worried about you

these two men own my whole heart (also my ao3 history i exclusively am reading bruabba and dadbacchio)

i have so so many thoughts toward them like yeah i just love them so much

i will never ever not write them as in love

t4t and bi4bi

every single canon thing about them makes me so soft but i think what makes me softest is just how its so clear that they rely on each other in situations

fanon interpretation rant rq:

but how some ppl really interpret them so ooc that its just like bruno mommy and abba cares about literally none of their kids (explanation on the mommy thing is bc most of things that do that are weird bc they really r treating bruno like a single parent who is raising the gang on his own and thats all when abba is literally there and caring about ppl (ie the purple haze incident w giorno, like he wasnt the most nice in his wording but why else would he be like hi move away from the danger if he didnt care??)

ppl also just tend to not really do the separation between how abba acts around others and how he acts towards bruno and has him being kinda aggressive towards him for literally no reason when they r literally so soft w each other

and also they r both so fucking pretty and i am in love with them both

if i think about them too long i will combust and i am blaming u solely for that one

ship dynamic of savior x savior bc they both really did save each other and i love them sm

fic ideas for them r they both live and leave passione and take their kids w them <3 (gang would crumble but thats not my problem)

ok also another hc that i have for them is that bruno will buy larger sweaters and wear them and give them to abba if hes having a rough time, they have a shared closet imo

10/10 ship

Gyjo:

OK OK OK

FEELINGS ON MAX

these guys r also my beloved but in a depressed x very happy but hiding depression way

the the fuckingn way that gyro ltierally risks everything in the ringo roadagain fight to save jognny

and the way that johnny is literally fucking broken post gyro persiheing and adopts his speech pattern a bit and ugh

I am obsessed w gyjo but i think the funniest crack ship is poly but w diego and they all fucking suffer (fic that sold me on that: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22887796/chapters/54705517)

i cannot find the one fic that i really loved for them but needless to say i am soft w them living and just being together

update i found it: its a modern au and really really sweet! https://archiveofourown.org/works/31821940/chapters/78780595

one day ill actually write the fic idea i had for them which was basically they live and they dont sell the land they got from the sugar mountain arc and johnny wanted to start somewhere fresh anyways and gyro adopts marco and they make a lil log cabin and have a nice rest of their lives

i am a massive sucker for their ship

ALSO how johnny is always laughing at gyros jokes

smth i wish we got more of in canon were those moments where they just chilled and talked and had those kinda interactions

fandom complaining time!! the fucking way that some ppl just really take the gyro funny and johnny submissive trope is like my biggest pet peeve. did they not read sbr?? did they not see the multiple times that johnny has murdery eyes? i think personally its ppl infantilizing him a lot and it makes me really frustrated

ok also a fic that really really fills me desire for a they all live and everyone is happy is this one: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22812394

i love them sm but unfortunately cannot have coherent thoughts about them :(

10/10 ship

Yasugap:

gonna start this out w saying i did mildly speedread through jojolion so i dont have as many big screamy thoughts

BUT!!! them!!!!!

their canon interactions r the cutest thing and even if they werent, id ship it solely to spite joshu

josuke is a million trillion times better for yasuho (not just bc of how joshu is a fucking freak and is absolutely the worst i would run him over with a dump truck)

i really like how they both r so happy around each other but i think my favorite scene w them is when yasuho has to explain to josuke that hes crying and hes just like :') yeah

but they have so so many cute moments and the ending makes them the only couple to make it out of this list

i love how yasuho is just like willing to drop anything to help him and how they help each other out a lot during the whole time (if im remembering right?)

their dynamic is just 2 sweethearts

also love the moment that hes like look away yasuho :) then proceeds to beat a man up

they r canon (as is everyone else sorry <3)

i dont read a lot of part 8 fic since i need to reread it to properly understand the plot post like chapter 65? so i dont have any recs or complaints

BUT i do have a few hcs!!

i think yasuho would get josuke matching phone straps or phone cases

and when they move in together, i think they would raise sugar gliders (or potentially kidnap squirrels from the local park)

i love all of yasuho and josukes interactions but oh man every time that josukes past gets brought up i do start bawling

they both mean the world to me and how their romance is just built on such a clear foundation of trust and care it makes me so soft

they both give off such dog ppl energy tho and i love that for them

ALSO ok the way that yasuho helps josuke w his memory and is always there for him

i will never ever ever get over them

but i think one of my favorite scenes is the one right at the beginning where she gives josuke his name and how that plays into the rest of the story with him discovering his identity but still clinging to the one that she gave him since it was him, he wasnt just kira or josefumi he was josuke

10/10

if i think about them anymore i will start sobbing, the last chapter wrapped every last thing up so well and im so so glad that it did

[random-mha-thoughts]

Bad Boy (Todoroki x Reader)

Pairing: Todoroki x Reader

Genre: Angst to fluff, and a lil spice ;), No quirk!AU

Summary: You finally get to see your childhood friend Shouto after years of being separated only to find out he’s completely changed.

BGM: “Younger” by Ruel

Word count: 2,781

Tags:  @yuki-osaki​ @liviitehe​ @iamsoftsodonttoucheume-blog​ @bunnythepipsqueak​

a/n: God this photo fucked me up good when I first saw it.

I saw this picture on my search for images for my last Todo post aaaaand yeah, pretty self explanatory. I got to thinking, what if this poor baby finally snapped one day and was like "FUCK ENDEAVOR AND HIS ENTIRE PROGRAM, IM NOBODY'S MASTERPIECE" and he went the complete opposite direction. So enjoy a little bit of OOC Todoroki and a bit of a longer post than my usual stuff!

I’m really really sorry about not updating in the past few days.  I was really swamped by college work and studying, and I was mentally exhausted and physically tired every day.  Today wasn’t my day and I almost had a breakdown because a lot of things piled up in me, but I had to pull myself together somehow.  Hopefully, after this week, I’ll go back to a somewhat regular posting schedule.  Thanks for being patient with me guys, I really appreciate it :)

When my mom told me Shouto will be going to the same high school as me, I was expecting the same buttoned-up, shy, good boy from elementary school.  Oh boy, was I wrong.

The boy I bump into in the hallway definitely looks like Shouto, but the only thing that's the same is his mismatched hair and eyes.  Everything else about him was much different.  His entire energy was different, even from the fraction of a second I focused on his face.

"Shouto?" I call when he's about to brush past me.

I don't think he's expecting someone to know him on the first day, pausing and looking down curiously.

The most shocking feature of all is the scar on his left side, a red blotch that covers the left side of his face, starkly contrasting his brilliant turquoise eye; a single ray of light in a scarlet sky.

As I'm gaping at the puckered skin, his eyebrows furrowing at my face as recognition slowly dawns on him.  "(Y/n)?"

I'm relieved that he at least remembers me.  "Yeah, hey."  I don't really know what to do now.  My first instinct is to hug him, but something tells me he isn't a fan of that sort of thing anymore.  There's a coldness between us that's thick as a knife.  "How have you been?"

"Fine," he answers curtly.  His hands are stuffed into his pockets, leaning back in a way that seems uncharacteristic of him and more like a ruffian.

Does his not want to talk to me?  I don't blame him, I haven't been in his life for a good eight years.  "How are your parents?"

His jaw clenches.  "Fine."

Oh.  I struck a nerve.  "Do you wanna catch up at lunch?  What class are you in?"

"1-A."  Overjoyed that we share the same class, I'm about to open my mouth, but he interjects, "But I don't think we should talk."  That was the last thing he said before he strolls past me.

I'm stunned, following his receding back through the sea of students.  I guess I shouldn't have brought up his parents when I know it's a sensitive topic, but I didn't know what else to say.  And it's probably awkward to see someone you used to be close to talk to you again, but the least he could've been is polite.  That's saying something, because Shouto was always the polite child.

Something is terribly wrong here.

Shouto has definitely changed since we were younger.  He's become a delinquent.

He never even shows up to class.  After our little encounter, he was slumped in his seat until the teacher finished role call, then he just got up and walked out in the middle of class and never came back.  In all the days after that, his seat remained empty even at the beginning of the day.

At first, I gave him the benefit of the doubt.  What if he happened to get sick and had to stay home?  Then I saw his signature mismatched tuft of hair walking back home in the school yard, and I knew he was skipping.

After a whole two weeks passed of him skipping, I had enough.  The Shouto I know would never cut class even if his life depended on it.  During lunch, I went looking for him in the group of other delinquent kids in the back of the school.

"Todoroki?" the ash-blond ringleader ruffles his hair and scoffs, "Idiot must be off somewhere by himself like the damn loner he is.  He picked a fight with me and I almost beat his ass into oblivion!"

I ball my fists up, more angry at Shouto than the group of boys eyeing me like a pack of wolves.  "You guys are useless," I mumble, about to turn away from them.

"Aww, is he your boyfriend, sweetie?" the honey blond with a black streak in his hair smoothly wraps an arm around me.  "He probably doesn't care about you, you deserve someone else who'll give you his time."

"Fuck off, who said you can touch me?"  I shove his arm away and step back.

"Calm down there," the red head with sharp teeth taunts with a smirk, "You're getting a bit defensive.  You sure you don't need help looking for your little prince?"

"I'm fine on my own, thanks," I huff, turning around to go look for Shouto elsewhere.

"Maybe I'll come with you," the overly-friendly boy blocks my way again.  "If he's not your boyfriend, maybe we can get together sometime?"

"Not interested.  Out of my way, Pikachu reject."  I try to side-step him, but the leader grabs the back of my collar and whips me around so I'm face to face with his bared teeth.

"You're a bit rude, aren't you?  Should I pull your head out your ass for you?"  His crimson eyes glare his murderous intent into me.

I hold my ground, the anger against my irresponsible friend more powerful than any fear of this hothead possibly hurting me.  "Don't act so tough if your talk is cheap."

He cracks his knuckles without breaking eye contact with me.  "I'll show you cheap talk.  Try waking up next week after I'm done with you!" he snarls.

I mirror his expression.  I don't mind throwing hands at this guy if I have to, blood rushing through me to prepare for the fist fight.  "I dare you-!"

"Enough, (Y/n)."

I can feel his presence right behind me even though he doesn't physically touch me.

Scarlet eyes shift behind me.  "Took you long enough, hot shot.  Your friend has just as much spunk as you, I'll kick both your asses!"

"I'd like to see you try, Bakugou," Shouto responds coldly.  "We both know who'd win."  Keeping his gaze locked on the aggressive male, he harshly grabs my arm and hauls me away.  "Let's go."

I'm fuming with anger when we're back inside the building.  I turn on him when he finally releases me, but he's already starting down the hall.  "Don't walk away from me!  We need to talk!"  I stomp over, following him to an abandoned classroom.  "What the hell is wrong with you?!  First of all, you were a real ass when I talked to you last week.  Second of all, you're not even coming to class like you should.  And now you're already picking fights with that idiot out there?  What's gotten into you Shouto?!"

"You were about to get into a fight as well.  You should thank me," he comments coldly, slipping into a desk with books open on top.

"I could've handled it just fine without you!  The only reason I was even there talking to them was because I was looking for you!"  I hover over him, glaring down so he can tell how angry I am.  "You'e skipped class all week, this isn't like you at all!  How are you supposed to catch-?"

One glance down the the open books shows all the material we've been going over in class.  He's already caught up to today's lesson, writing notes in his book and ignoring my presence.  The entire setup makes me angrier.  "I don't understand you, Shouto.  What kind of act are you trying to pull?  You're not a delinquent, why are you trying to act like one for everyone else?   Or is this all because you're just trying to ignore me?"

His pencil stops moving and it slams down onto the desk.  "A lot happened since you left, (Y/n)," the boy responds.  His quivering voice indicates restriction of intense emotion.

The hurt is apparent across his entire face, calming me down.  My gaze lingers on the left side of his features, over the eye that somehow looks perpetually sad.  "How did you get that scar, Shouto?"

The boy's eyebrows furrow.  "My father never let up on me after you left, and he got worse.  My mother couldn't handle fighting him on her own anymore.  One day, she snapped, told me how unsightly my left side was, and pouring boiling water over my face."  His large hand gingerly covers his reddened skin.  "And my bastard father put her in a mental institution after that.  He did this."

My heart aches for my childhood friend, the boy I took care of and listened to all his problems.  I can't imagine how much pain Rei was going through.  For her to have lost it, she must've held such a heavy burden.  When I had to move away, I felt so guilty about leaving him with all his troubles.  He had no one else to reach out to and it was snatched from him.  There wasn't a day I stopped thinking and worrying over him.  I reach to take his hand and offer comfort.  "Shou-"

Shouto bolts up from his seat, his taller figure hunching over mine, features screwed up in distaste.  "You weren't there when I needed you most."

I'm taken back, hurt more than anything.  "It's not my fault, we were so much younger, I didn't have a choice but to go with my parents."

A dark chuckle erupts from his lips, dismissing my excuses.  "It's fine.  It happened, I've learned to deal with it."

I'm about to blow my top with this kid.  "Yeah, you've dealt really well, haven't you?" I roll my eyes.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

My mouth gapes, letting out a sputtered scoff.  "You're kidding.  Just look at you!  You're pretending to be someone you're not!  You and I both know you were never the bad boy type when we were kids.  You're the slightly awkward, naturally smart, driven, hardworking-"

"I was only those things because my father forced them on me," he passes by me, crossing his arms.  "I don't want to be anything that bastard wants anymore.  And if you can't see that, then we were never friends in the first place."

That's a stab in the chest.  How can he say that we were never friends when we used to do everything together?  A surge of fury rushing through me, I grab his arm to keep him from moving any farther.  "You love watching superhero cartoons, your favorite was All Might.  Sometimes, you're so damn lazy that instead of doing homework when you came home, you would sneak in a nap before your dad came home to see you slacking off.  Your favorite food in the entire world is cold soba.  You don't like extremely sweet desserts.  You've always been insecure about how strange your mismatched hair and eyes look, but I always had to assure you that you're still the most handsome guy in our class."

Shouto halfway turns around to look at me.

"If we weren't friends, why do I know so much about you?"  I take another bold step towards him, softening at the underlying pain etched into his features.  "I know you always hated the way your dad expects so much from you.  The only thing you ever wanted in your childhood was to be normal.  The pressure finally crumbled down on you and your mom, and I'm sorry I wasn't there to help you through it.  But you shouldn't abandon everything that you are.  You took after your mom more than your dad; you're sometimes a sassy son of a bitch, but you're kind and have a deep respect for people you admire.  You have a natural sense of humor that you don't even know you have.  You care about the people you're close to, you only struggle with communicating how you feel sometimes."

His lips part slightly, processing everything I just showered onto him.  Guilt eventually creeps up on him, choosing to rub the back of his neck.  "You...always did know just what to say."

I smirk and engulf him into my long-awaited hug.  "Who else would put you back in your place?"

His arms hesitantly wrap around my body, the act of sharing body warmth strange yet familiar to him.  It's a small victory, but I'm relieved that we're back on speaking terms.  I'm ready to resume protecting him as I should.

Shouto shifts in our embrace.  "You said...I struggle with telling people how I feel...?" he mumbles sheepishly near my ear.

My boy perks with confusion.  "Yeah, even when we first-"

"Would it suffice if..."

Before I can turn to search his face for what he could be implying, his grip around me loosens as he pulls back to look at me, one of his warm hands resting against my cheek.  His face looms right in front of me, my breath catching in surprise, before he presses his lips to mine softly.  The weightlessness in my stomach is unmistakable.

As quick and unexpected as it came, it also left, Shouto's half lidded gaze resting on me from a small distance away.  All I can do is stare off dazed, still trying to process what just happened.

He leans back against the nearest desk in the front row.  "I guess I should've asked first."  I can see his cheeks and his ears turn almost as flushed as the color of his hair despite his hand covering half his face to hide it.  "But it was the only way I can think to get my point across without stumbling over words."

My heart still flutters trying to recover back to normal, my knees shaking as I lean against the teacher's desk for stability.  I resist the urge to touch my lips like a shocked schoolgirl, but I'm still trying to process the whole thing.  "You know," I cough, "We did already kiss when we were like...five, so this wasn't really our first.  But I don't usually count that-"

The intense color fades from his face almost at once, a darkness creeping into his gaze.  "Then," he pins me back into the desk, hands on both sides of the wood to trap me, "I shouldn't have any qualms about doing it again."

Contrasting from his strong setup, his next kiss is still shy and hesitant.  After exchanging a couple more tentative lip-caresses that still make my head spin, he's gotten his feet wet enough to go harder, establishing a rhythm between us.  As his kisses intensify, his hands reach up to cup both sides of my nape, fingers tangling in my hair desperately and tilting my head up for a better angle.  My own hands grasp the collar of his uniform, pulling him closer into the heat of the moment.

His body pushes me practically into sitting on top of the desk, moving one of his knees between my legs as he lets ones of his hands roam down to grip my waist.  The sudden tug elicits a minute gasp, allowing Shouto to nip at my bottom lip before tugging my head back to trail soft kisses down my jaw.  My fingers thread through his soft locks, letting him massage my neck with his mouth.

"W-Where did you learn all this?" I breathe out unsteadily, my breath refusing to return.

He straightens up and captures my lips in another slow kiss.  "You'll never know."  Another one.  "I've admittedly imagined this for a while."  The next kiss is much deeper, a hum vibrating from his chest as his fingers dig into my side again.  "You're special, so dear."  His mumbles between kisses become more incoherent as his kisses become messy.

"Shouto."  I finally manage to push him away for me to breathe and calm my dizzy head.  Both of us are panting.  His half-lidded eyes and flushed face tempt me, but the fear of someone walking by suddenly alerts in my mind.  "Someone might see us.  Besides, isn't there something you need to say?"

His brow lifts.  "I'm...sorry for being rude to you last week."

"That was needed, too," I chuckle, "But there's something else."

Confusion crosses his features.  "Have I done something else wrong?"

My hands slide down to grip his hands.  "Don't you need to ask me to date you officially?"

The tint of rose on his cheeks intensifies a shade.  "I thought it was clear already..."

Another chuckle bubbles from my lips and I lean up to kiss his warm cheek.  "I'll let it pass because I want to date you too."  His face begins to light up in joy, but I push off from the desk and tow him out of the room.  "But you have to start coming to class again."

Shouto catches up to keep pace with me and presses a kiss to my forehead.  "Done."

"And you need to see a therapist, Mr. Bad Boy."

He breaks out into a smile at that nickname.  "I'll think about it."

[mizunetzu]

hey :) can i request something angsty for sakusa x male? where sakusa was only forced to date reader when they confessed and reader notices that sakusa always feels uncomfortable around them and stuff. something like that, hope you can make it. thanks!!!

Hi !! I’m so so so sorry if sakusa seems ooc or something, I haven’t really clicked with s4 yet, so I didn’t have a good grasp on his character? Also, the way I wrote this I feel didn’t live up to my own expectations. It made me kind of unmotivated to write this, but it made me feel bad for not finishing it, so I decided to at least post the draft. I hope that’s ok !!

——————

Sakusa x reader - unfinished (literally)

⚠️ warnings - unfinished fic, messy, unclear storyline

Pronouns - male, he/him

——————

“I...I like you, will you go out with me?” (Y/n) said, bowing down with his two hands extending a love letter infront of him. (Y/n) was sweating and blushing profusely, while Sakusa stepped back a bit. They stood in a suffocating silence for what seemed like hours

Oh god. Oh Jesus. This was a terrible idea. (Y/n) couldn’t meet his gaze, instead choosing not to look up from his hunched position. (Y/n’s) arms faltered a bit as he smiled stiffly.

“Ha...I’m-im sorry it must be weird to be confessed to by a guy...let alone your teammate,” (y/n) kept his head down low, his outstretched arms now fully retreating and standing up straight. (Y/n’s) traumatized expression was too pityful not to feel bad for, even for Sakusa.

“....Please ignore everything I just said. Thank you.” (Y/n) said, smiling in a bitter attempt to keep salty tears at bay. Even a three year old could tell that the boy was probably going to cry his ass off later and in worst case, quit the team out of embarrassment.

That would be bad. (Y/n) did have a tendency to lead with his emotions too much. He’s a good asset, even if he’s on the bench most games, when he gets switched in he can score a ton of points. Sakusa didn’t want to be the reason his team fell apart.

And as selfish as it seemed, he did feel guilty about not accepting.

“Wait.” Sakusa called out just as (y/n) began to trudge away. The (h/c) boy whipped his head back faster than light, his eyes brightening up in hope. “Y-yeah?”

“...”

Was he really going to do this?

“You didn’t let me answer....” (y/n’s) face lit up like a kid on Christmas Day.

He was.

———

1 month.

1 month they’ve been dating.

If Sakusa had any say in the matter, he would’ve thought that was 1 month too many.

“Omi-Chan!” Sakusa visibly cringed under his mask. “Yo!” He stopped in his tracks and reluctantly let the boy catch up to him.

“Hi.” (Y/n) smiled widely. “Ready to go to practice?”

“Sure.” Sakusa began walking towards the gym, (y/n) trailing behind him, catching up slowly. He hesitated before nervously slipping his hand into omi’s, unsure of how he’d react. Sakusa whipped his hand out of his grasp, dusting it off before shoving it in his pocket.

“Thats...dirty...”

(Y/n) looked at him, embarrassed. “I’m sorry”

“It’s fine.”

That shouldn’t have hurt as much as it did, (Y/n) told himself. You knew he was a huge germ nut.

(Y/n) stole a glance at his boyfriend. He didn’t look at him back. Actually, now that he thought about it, Sakusa hasn’t spared a single glance on him the whole time.

The rest of the walk was silent.

——

‘Good morning !!’ Read

‘You were great at morning practice today. As expected of our ace !!’ Read

‘I love youuuuuu’ read

‘Do you wanna grab some food after practice?” Read

“He’s probably busy.” (Y/n) thought. “Oh well, I’ll ask him about it at practice today, it’s most likely nothing”

There was a strong silence consuming the gym, until the doors burst open reaveling a stupidly happy (y/n) standing tall, (or short ykyk) and proud.

“Hello everyone! Hi Ooooooomi!”

The team chorused out a greeting as (y/n) stepped in. He stopped infront of his boyfriend, who was wiping his hands on a cloth in his volleyball bag. He didn’t turn around until (y/n) cleared his throat.

“...”

“Um,” (y/n) started. “So, Mizunetzu has no clue how to finish this coherently.”

“Mm.” Omi set the rag down and turned on his heel. “He has no clue how my character is like other than the ‘clean dude’. Therefore, he lost motivation quickly”

“Yeah, Hes suuuuuper sorry, but it’s not like it would’ve had a super great ending anyway. So why finish it?”

“I don’t know...some people like finished fics. Also, I’m breaking up with you.” (Y/n) whipped his head towards his former boyfriend.

“W-why? I thought we were a thing?” (Y/n) fumbled over his words. Sakusa shrugged, spraying the boy with a spray bottle of cleaning solution he pulled out from his bag.

“For lack of a better ending. Maybe the person reading could, I don’t know, finish this fic in their head.” (Y/n) promptly wiped off the droplets of cleaning solution from his face.

“Huh. How interesting.”

——————

Im like, so sorry LMAO

[daylighteclipsed]

“This is another reason most of future lost rights” May we hear your thoughts?

Now that I have officially finished watching the original Steven Universe series, I have many Thoughts about the continuation. Prepare for some detailed salty takes.

-- My biggest gripe is that Garnet, Pearl, and Amethyst lose pretty much all of the emotional intelligence they gain in the original series to maximize Steven’s suffering.

So like the gifset that prompted this ask for example, where Garnet realizes she’s hurt Steven with her future vision and apologizes? Makes her reaction in Future to realizing she hurt Steven again OOC. The OG series also teaches us and Steven that Garnet can’t see definites, because there’s so many possibilities, and the future’s always changing, and the future can always be changed. So her line about how there was no universe where Steven didn’t propose to Connie as her reason for why she didn’t try to stop him, is bullshit.

The Volleyball episode gives away that Steven is clearly not OK, and Pearl does nothing about it. Neurotic, mother hen, let’s make a plan Pearl does not ask Steven if he’s alright and makes 0 plans to train him to control his new alarming powers. Pearl, who now has a better sense of how trauma works because she has it herself, who we have seen in the OG series suspect Steven is dealing with some post traumatic stress after being taken to Homeworld and reach out to him about it, does not in Future reach out to him after he expresses blatant distress over having to deal with more of his mom’s problems. I’m supposed to believe this? Seriously?

And Amethyst? I think she’s the most obvious offender since a big part of her arc in the end of the OG series is emotional maturity.There’s a whole episode dedicated to her putting Steven’s feelings first. Acknowledging the pressure he’s been under and the shit that’s been dumped on him for years and the horror of finding out Rose was a Diamond which makes him a Diamond and recognizing that he’s not OK. He can’t be. Learning that Steven deals by distracting himself with other tasks and people. But sure when Amethyst notices Steven throwing himself into his work in Future, her response is just “When did you become such a prick?” Yeah. Totally sounds right.

There is a whole arc about these two emotionally connecting through their insecurities and the strength they find in having each other to relate to and rely on and confide in. It is one of my favorites in the entire story. And it is totally thrown out a window in Future. If no one else you’d think at least Amethyst would reach out to Steven in Future before he spirals, but no.

Literally it’s like the entire Gem trio’s emotionally sent back to square 1 and their perception’s lowered to 0, which is lower than it was to begin with, because it was the only way Future could work. Seriously, after Prickly Pair nobody tries to talk to Steven? Nobody insists they need to talk about what the fuck just happened? Nobody goes after Steven when he runs away, twice?! Once after crashing the van with his dad inside, in which he disappears for 3 whole days. Another time after talking about how they can’t help him anymore, which is really alarming! Then they all just let Steven go when he returns from Homeworld glowing with Diamond pupils?! are you kidding me, are you fUcking KidDing me am I supposed to believe they’re even his friends in Future what the fuck I hate this 

-- And framing everything like the Gems have never been there for Steven? Hate that too. There’s countless episodes in the OG series proving that’s not true. Steven himself says it’s not. At one point that’s what keeps him from literally falling from the sky.

“I just need something that makes me happy, something I can always depend on to cheer me up. My guys. They spent all night out here just to keep me company. No matter how much I mess up they’ll be there to help me.”

It’s the biggest reason why the Gems are foils to the Diamonds!

“Remember back when I was little and maybe kind of annoying, and I couldn’t come along on adventures? You guys would still drop everything to hang out with me.”

Garnet, Pearl, and Amethyst begin kind of oblivious and inattentive, but they don’t stay that way. They are always learning, and apologizing, and changing when they realize their behavior is harmful. To themselves, to the team as a whole, to strangers, to Steven. They do very early in the series start setting work aside to spend time with him. Together breakfast (which ends up meaning so much to Garnet that it becomes her wedding cake), mini golf, cards, board games, movies, the arcade, the amusement park. They’re Steven’s band in beach-a-palooza. They become, not only better caretakers, but his friends.

A team. For the main Crystal Gem quartet so much of the show is about them learning to become a team by learning to understand each other and helping each other grow, leading to a stunning display of teamwork in the finale with Garnet, Pearl, Amethyst, and Steven all fusing together into one kickass warrior, Obsidian. It’s so perfect that this didn’t, couldn’t, happen until the end, after all that development. It’s so satisfying.

-- Like I mentioned before, there’s no reason why the Gems, including the others like Peridot, Lapis, and Bismuth, wouldn’t try to help Steven learn to control his new powers in Future.

-- A lot of the, uh, conflicts Steven faces in Future also feel ignorant to the OG series.

Steven in future: i just feel like i can’t make mistakes in front of you guys and cant be honest cause its mean and i have to be nice and perfect :(

Steven in og series: oh geez I really messed up sorry guys; [feels like the worst Crystal Gem cause he’s always fucking up]; (Garnet: You’re making Pearl very upset) “IM very upset!“; “What Rose wanted--ARGH! What about what I want?! I’m sick of you always lying to me!”; “Home’s been awful! Here’s been awful! Everyone’s been acting awful too!”

Steven in future: idk how to be a friend to someone who’s not a miserable sad sack with no direction in life

Connie: hey what the fuck

What was the point of all the townie episodes if we’re going to act like Steven never connected with the human part of his life why would the og show bounce between gem eps and human eps if not to show how Steven connects with both worlds ad’g;ajfgjfagjLAFKJS

Steven in future: why didn’t my meddling advice work? this has never happened before. am i losing my touch. who am i

Og Steven, multiple times: aaAAAAAH I SHOULD NOT HAVE MEDDLED AND PUSHED I MADE THINGS WORSE

- Why wasn’t Mindful Education revisited? Steven’s a fusion technically, right, so if he’s feeling, you know, deeply conflicted about his 2 halves, doesn’t that mean he’s out of harmony? There’s a way for 2 halves of a fusion to communicate through meditation and address what’s causing the imbalance, but I guess that would’ve solved Steven’s problem too easily. That’s the only reason Connie’s kept out of Future for so long too, right? Ugh. Never mind the fact that Mindful Ed taught Steven that it’s really important to face upsetting thoughts and feelings and traumas before they tear him apart. But whatever! what ever

- God this isn’t even half of the issues I now have with Future, but I don’t want this post to be 8 miles longer than it already is. Basically I feel like Future does a disservice to the characters and story being told in the original series, which I am very fond of now. It reminds me of an OOC fanfiction. It leaves a bad taste in my mouth.

I really do not want to argue about this. It’s just my opinion. I’m kind of venting. If you agree, great. If you don’t, please keep scrolling. Thanks.

[mbeebowriting]

draco malfoy x reader

warnings: none other than a kinda ooc draco!

word count: 1.8k

notes: okay this is very specific and super self indulgent but also really sweet and cute so!!! enjoy!!! (also this is unedited bc im too antsy and excited to post it

     the past 2 weeks had overwhelmed you. tests, papers, concerts, forced social gatherings- your energy had just run out. you still had another week to go before any kind of break though- so the timing of your burnout was less than ideal. at this point, you barely had enough energy to talk to your friends, so when draco malfoy tapped on your shoulder during class, you whirled around, ready to fight. what you weren’t expecting was his question.

     “can you help me with this?” you blinked in surprise. she you had short conversations before class, but it still shocked you a little bit.

     “yeah, sure. i’ll show you.” you walked him through the spell a few times, until he was able to execute it well enough to pass. 

     “great, thank you!” he said with a smile. his politeness threw you off, and all you could do was smile and turn back around. what you didn’t see was how his smile fell after that.

     the next day, for whatever reason, he sat next to you, but you were still feeling equally as drained as the day before. at the end of class he stopped you from leaving with yet again, a small conversation.

     “do you think we could meet out of class to work on these charms? you seem to really understand it and i could use some help.”

     “im sorry draco- my schedule is completely packed until our break.” you replied with a sad smile. “i’ve actually got another performance tonight for the staff dinner.”

     “hm. what about after that? we could grab some dinner and study.” you were taken aback again. why was he being so nice to you? you couldn’t turn him down after he’s showing you kindness you’ve never seen before. plus, he was really cute, you’ve always kind of had a thing for him. 

     “alright, how about 8 o’clock in the great hall?”

     “great, it’s a date.” he said with a wink before leaving the class- leaving you flustered and unsure of what just happened.

     after you had finished your performance, you made your way to the great hall, spotting draco on the way. you chatted idly while grabbing some food and a table. draco sat to your right and your textbooks piled up to your left.  once you began studying, you felt the weight of the day hit you, and you ended up zoning out and staring at your textbook. you laid your head in your hand and decided to close your eyes for just one minute. unsurprisingly, you fell asleep. when you woke up, you and draco were the only ones in the room.

     “good morning.” draco said. it was at this point that you realized the position you were in, in your sleep, you had shifted so that  your head was resting on his shoulder. you immediately lifted your head up and avoided eye contact with him. 

     “what time is it?”

     “11:30-ish.”

     “you let me sleep that long?’ you exclaimed.

     “you just seemed so tired and like you needed a break. and plus…” he trailed off. “nevermind.”

     “no no, wait. plus what?” he became visibly flustered.

     “nothing, there is no plus!”

     “tell me what the plus is or i’ll ditch you and hang out with potter instead.” his eyes widened- did that actually make him mad?

     “fine. i was just going to say you looked cute on my shoulder like that.” now it was your turn to be flustered. suddenly your textbook was incredibly interesting. you could feel him smirking beside you, but couldn’t bring yourself to look at him. he leaned into to your ear and sent chills down your spine as he spoke. “but to be fair, you look cute all the time.” you covered your face with your hands to hide your blush. he went to pull your hands away, and chuckled as you swatted them away. “hey, you asked for this! why are you so embarrassed anyway, i’m just stating facts.” you sighed in response, but couldn’t hold back a smile. 

     “i need to go draco, i have another concert tomorrow and i need to be at my best.” your smile fell.

     “alright. i hope it goes well.” you gave him a sad smile and couldn’t stop the tears from pricking at your eyes. “hey woah, what’s going on? are you okay?”

     “yeah.” you said shakily and unconvincingly, to which he gave you a look. “i’m just exhausted and… i really wish my family could be here for this concert.” you were so focused on talking without crying your barely noticed draco’s hand holding your own. “everyone else’s families come for this concert, it’s our last one, but my parents decided… they would rather visit my sisters than me. i just wish someone would come support me at this last concert.” one tear was set free as you blinked. it rolled down your cheek and dropped onto draco’s hand. he was clearly caught off guard by your sudden change in emotion, but his voice was steady when he spoke.

     “what time is it?”

     “no, draco-”

     “and where?”

     “draco you don’t have to come out of pity, it’s okay. this is how it’s always been, i’m used to it. i stopped looking for familiar faces in the audience years ago.”

     “what? that’s not okay! when and where is it. i’ll be there.” you studied his eyes before answering.

     “it’s here, after they serve dinner.”

     “i’ll be there.” 

     “...why?”      “because you deserve to have someone in the audience-”

     “no, why are you being so nice to me? this feels so… out of character for you.” his eyes darted around the room, looking anywhere but your own. 

     “i- you just haven’t done anything wrong for me to… uhh…” he struggled to find the word. “tease you for.” you couldn’t help but feel disappointed at his response.

     “well, thank you for that i guess. but we should really get going. it’s late.” he agreed with you, so you packed up all your things and went your separate ways.

     “(y/n)!” your roommate shouted as you walked in. “where on GOD have you been? don’t you have a concert tomorrow and classes all morning?” you flopped down on your bed.

     “yeah, since when do you track my schedule?”

     “you were complaining about it in charms.”

     “fair enough, that does sound like me. but why are you so worried about this suddenly?”

     “hmm, not worried, just curious.” she said, sitting next to you on your bed. “i happened to walk by the great hall just an hour ago,” your eyes went wide. “and saw you with none other than the prince of slytherin himself: draco malfoy.”

     “don’t jump to conclusions, we were just studying.”

     “for god’s sake (y/n), you were asleep on his shoulder! did he ever say it was a date? i bet he did.” 

     “well yeah, but i thought he was just teasing. he does that.” she gave you the same look that draco had given you earlier. “okay and he also called me cute and is coming to my concert tomorrow but don’t read into that, he probably wasn’t serious!” 

     “guess we’ll just have to wait and see.”

     “what?”

     “well if he has a thing for you too, he’ll be at the concert.”

     “too? excuse you?”

     “i love you to death (y/n) but you’re a terrible liar, and you’re not very subtle.”

     the day’s classes had flown by- it was concert time. you arrived early, helping set up the chairs and music, and once you had settled into your spot and people had filled in, you couldn’t believe what you saw. what seemed like the entirety of the slytherin house was packed into the front section, with one familiar asshole front and center. he caught your eye and sent you a smile. you couldn’t even think of what to do back, you were too shook.

     the concert itself went by quickly. you played beautifully, and all of your emotions poured through your instrument. by the end, you were shaky, emotional, and nervous to see draco after. you didn’t have much time to compose yourself however, as he was the first person you saw as you walked off stage. before you could say anything, he wrapped you in a hug (but quickly pulled away once he realized people were staring).

     “you did incredible!”

     “thank you- how did you… why are there… what?” you could barely get a sentence out.

     “i just asked some people to come and support you, you deserve a big cheering section.”

     “draco, i…” suddenly you were aware of everyone standing around you two. “can we maybe go somewhere a little quieter?” he nodded and pulled you through the crowd, out the door, and down the hallway into the courtyard. he sat down on a bench and motioned for you to sit next to him, which you gladly did. you took a deep breath before speaking, trying to kill your nerves that arose with the thought of sharing your feelings with him. you were so in your head, you barely processed what he said when he spoke.

      “you really did well up there today. and you look stunning too, by the way.” again, no thoughts heady empty, you could not think of a response for the life of you. he chuckled. “i’m sure you’ve figured it out by now, i’m not just nice to you because you ‘done nothing wrong’ or whatever i said yesterday.” he stared at you, waiting for a response, but all you could do was smile and let your palms sweat. “are you really gonna make me say it? it’s because i like you (y/n).” the final twist of the knife. there were simultaneously one million and absolutely no thoughts swimming around your head, but when you didn’t respond he started to lean away and looked hurt.

     “wait no- i’m sorry! this is just a lot all at once! i like you too draco.” you rushed out. he returned to your side, eyebrows raised.

     “yeah?”

     “yeah. you must have charmed me or something, because i really do. somehow.”

      “hey! first of all, rude. second of all, i’m terrible at charms. you know that.” you two joked back and forth until the moon shone brightly up above. after you both agreed it was time to head back to your respective dorms, a nervous silence fell. 

     “sooo…” you drawled on. “good night i guess?”

     “good night to you too.” silence again. “do you have time for another study date tomorrow? i spent most of our last one being nervous and trying not to wake you up.”

     “yeah! i’m free tomorrow night if you want?”

     “alright, it’s a date.” he said for leaning down to kiss you, and walking away. leaving you flustered and unsure of what just happened for the second time that week.

[booklover223]

CAFFEINE

Pairing/s: Pre-romantic/Romantic Intrulogical, background romantic Prinxiety, background pre-romantic Moceit (just mentions though)

Word Count: 5,166

Warning/s: misunderstandings, some cussing. (Let me know if you want me to edit this I’ve never written for tumblr before!) kinda ooc! Remus but he’s emotional and it’s mostly a Logan centric fic.

A/N: So this is the first time I’m posting on tumblr, if you want to read it on AO3 here is the link ——> https://archiveofourown.org/works/26729227 but be warned! The story is formatted for a computer moreso than a phone so there are very long paragraphs I’m sorry!! I’m fixing the formatting for the post though (ITS SUPER LONG IM SORRY 🥺🥺🥺👉🏼👈🏼) this is a songfic btw! Song is called Caffeine by Fly By Midnight and I love it it reminded me of intrulogical immediately for some reason and I was forced to write this basically.

Logan was at his desk, laptop open but he wasn’t focused on it. He had come to a startling and scary realization the day before when he had been sitting in the kitchen watching as Roman and Remus bickered over ideas for Thomas to use. He had watched as Remus poured unholy amounts of what looked like raspberry flavored syrup (at least he thinks it was syrup it had the consistency of syrup and the color of raspberries..) onto his bacon and eggs. He had happened to glance over at Remus and Remus had looked at him, smiled a quick flash before pulling him into the debate of ideas. When he had finished Remus’s smile was blinding and he had felt something stir in his chest.

He had ignored it at the time but later that night it had happened again, again caused by Remus. His heart fluttered when Remus smiled at him a quick bright thing like the flash of a camera before turning back to whomever he was talking to. He quickly excused himself and all but ran to his room. Logan prided himself on not having feelings, at least that’s what he told everyone else. Logan did have feelings, he just didn’t like them. But he had never had these feelings before. He had felt them of course, whenever Thomas had a crush or was in a relationship so he knew what they were but he personally had never had them before. Before Janus and Remus were accepted he hadn’t thought that he ever would have these feelings. Virgil and Roman had gotten together fairly quickly and Patton was more of a brother to him, and he had never seen him in a romantic sense. He just thought he didn’t have enough emotion to have romantic feelings, but what he felt just now had ruined all of that and now he had a problem.

Logan didn’t want romantic feelings. Hell, he didn’t want feelings at all, and he tried his best to repress them. But these unwanted things that affected Logan more than he liked to admit were persistent. He didn’t know how to deal with them. He thought back, trying to pinpoint the exact moment these feelings started and could only think of the amount of time hes been spending with the embodiment of intrusive thoughts. He had never had a problem with Remus, and sometimes sought him out for conversations, but once he was accepted he had started talking to him more, spending more and more time with him and his feelings had apparently grown from there. Maybe if he didn’t spend as much time with Remus as he did the feelings would go away? It was a stretch but it was all he could think of. So with a plan in mind he shut down his computer and went to bed.

Off in the imagination, Remus smiled to himself as he created stars and galaxies. He knew he had a crush on the resident nerd and he was really hoping that Logan liked him back, but he would wait for now and just enjoy his company as friends. He had always liked the nerd, when he had been a “Dark” side Logan was the only “Light” side who had tolerated him. Roman had come around, wanting to mend their broken bond but even he could get fed up with Remus’s constant chatter and rapid thought process. Logan never did, he always kept pace with Remus, always had. And he never shied away when topics took a darker turn. He rolled with the waves and explained, expanded upon, or dismembered the thoughts Remus couldn’t control and couldn’t filter and was never disgusted by them.

He listened to Remus in a way none of the others ever had. Even Janus had to stop him sometimes, the thoughts Remus spewed disturbing the deceitful side. But now that he was accepted, he had been spending more and more time with Logan and he was loving every minute of it! He pulled him into debates or just talked to him for hours and never got bored listening to him ramble about whatever was on his mind. He was cute the way he lit up whenever Remus asked him to explain or elaborate on whatever topic he was talking about. Remus flung the last of the stars into the sky and sunk into his room ready for a good rest. He had a million things he wanted to ask Logan about space, one of his special interests he found out last week and he also wanted to show him what he made tonight. Sleep took him quickly, a smile on his face.

The next morning Remus eagerly waited for Logan to come to breakfast, he wanted to show him a new recipe he had found and wanted to get Logan’s input on the best way to get Thomathy to make it for the Halloween party he was planning. But as the hour dragged by and Logan still hadn’t come down for breakfast, which was weird and slightly alarming as he almost never changed his schedule, Remus got worried. He decided to check on Logan and see if he was sick or something and quickly made his way upstairs to Logan’s room. He knocked on the door, if a bit too fast and waited as patiently as he could until he heard Logan call a quiet “Come in.”

He swung the door open, unintentionally slamming it against the wall and cringing slightly before bounding into the room. He looked around, he had been in Logan’s room before, he had been in everyone’s room before when he wasn’t accepted. He was always trying to spook everyone and catch them off guard, but Logan usually ignored him. With his acceptance his intrusive thoughts had calmed some, and he wasn’t as well, intrusive, as he used to be. He was still loud, he was still as hyperactive as ever and he still lacked a filter most days. But he was getting better, and he was trying to be better for Thomas. He stood in the middle of Logan’s room, closing the door with a snap of his fingers as he watched his crush type away on his laptop. He frowned when Logan didn’t turn to greet him but he shrugged and walked over to the Logical side’s desk.

“Watcha workin’ on Logie Bear?” He asked leaning over Logan and plopping his head onto his shoulder. He felt Logan freeze up, though he didn’t stop typing, which was weird. He hadn’t done that since they were teens, so he immediately pulled his head away and took a step back. Maybe he’s just stressed? He waiting as he watched Logan turn around and fix his glasses, a tick he had noticed he did whenever he was thinking. “Hello Remus.” He said it with none of the warmth that Remus had become accustomed to in the recent months and he was taken aback by it, but before he could even begin processing that he was interrupted.

“To answer your question, I am working on fixing Thomas’s schedule for next week. Since yourself and Roman have been pulling him into the Imagination more often he has been neglecting his real-world duties like laundry, washing the dishes, and a multitude of other things. Hopefully, you can convince Roman to keep a clear schedule next week. I am asking you to as well, though I know it will be hard “When Creativity strikes” as the saying goes but please try and withhold in for at least this next week. I have the weekend open for him if you and your brother do have any urges.” Remus stood there, his mouth slightly agape as Logan finally looked him in the eyes.

Remus blinked a few times before nodding voice subdued as he responded “Sure Lo, I’ll- I’ll try. And I’ll tell Roman too give him a heads up!” He smiled though it felt forced and quickly left the room. When Logan had looked at him, it was as if they hadn’t been spending these last few months together, He was closed up again, the strict no-nonsense mask he wore around everyone but him was... back up. What had happened?

Remus felt a tightness in his chest, but he took a few deep breaths and decided that Logan was just having a bad day. He and Roman have been hogging a majority of Thomas’s time this past week. Because they were allowed to work together again, they had been on fire giving Thomas amazing ideas and flying through the imagination fighting Gloria (the Dragonwitch) and her hordes of armies and other adventures. He shrugged off his bad thoughts and quickly went to find RoRo to tell him about Logan’s plan for the next week.

Logan sighed as Remus left the room. He rubbed his eyes and slumped in his seat as he tried to ignore the warmth of where Remus’s head had laid on his shoulder.

How had he not noticed that he liked Remus in a romantic way? How had he let himself get so comfortable that he had let his feelings creep in and take hold of his heart? He sighed and turned back to his desk glancing at the picture he had there. It was about a week after Janus and Remus had been accepted that Thomas insisted they took this photo, all of the sides plus Thomas in the middle. Virgil was sitting on Roman’s lap; Patton was leaning into two pairs of Janus’s arms and Remus had his arm thrown around Logan’s shoulders head thrown back as the others looked at him with varying degrees of disgust and embarrassment. Logan chuckled as he remembered the filthy joke Remus had told to get that reaction, and then he sighed as his eyes lingered on Remus’s form. He felt the ghost warmth of that arm thrown over his shoulder and squeezed his eyes shut.

This was for the best. He was Logic, he didn’t have feelings, or at least he shouldn’t. And besides even if he admitted to liking him, Remus would never reciprocate his feelings. So he rubbed his eyes, fixed his tied and went back to work. He had noticed that Remus had seemed off this morning, but he brushed it off and tried to focus on his work.

It had been three weeks, and everyone knew something was up with Logan and Remus. Logan had been acting a little too normal almost cold in his dealings with the others and Remus had been holed up in his room most of the time, and when he wasn’t in his room he kept to the imagination and only talked to Roman. Every time he was within viewing distance of Logan, he shot him wounded looks before leaving the room. The four sides decided to get to the bottom of this and set a meeting time aside for later that night after subtly observing the other two.

After dinner that night Janus, Patton, Roman, and Virgil met up in Janus’s room to discuss their observations of the day. Roman sighed before starting. “Remus has been acting odd these last few weeks as everyone knows. I tried to talk to him about why he seemed so down but all he did was yell ‘Fuck off bro’ before hitting me over the head with his morning star and running off into the woods.” He rubbed his head, presumably where Remus had hit him but there was no longer any wounds or lesions on his head that showed the damage. Virgil pulled him into a sideways hug and kissed his cheek. Janus glanced at Patton. Patton sighed and started fiddling with his hoodie sleeves.

“Logan looked was pretty out of it. He had about 10 empty coffee cups on his desk and he was all disheveled and when I asked how he was doing he said ‘fine.’ But I don’t think he's doing fine guys.” He said as he looked around the room. Janus nodded as Patton’s gaze landed on him. “I heard his lie about being fine, but I couldn’t pinpoint why exactly he wasn’t fine.” Virgil sighed as he leaned into Roman’s side. “I could feel both Logan and Remus’s anxiety spike when you asked them but it was more of a general anxiety nothing I could pinpoint.” They all looked at each other helplessly until Roman stood up. “I’m going to see my brother and figure this out I don’t care if I have to tie him to a chair!” He stormed off before the others could even think to stop him and they all hoped he could get through to Remus.

Remus was laying sprawled out like a starfish on his bed, humming a song he had heard as Thomas was scrolling through Instagram. His intrusive thoughts had been getting bad again without Logan there to counteract and break them down for him and he was starting to lose his head again. He could feel himself losing his already loose grip on reality every day that passed and he didn’t want anybody to think he was going back to how he was before he was accepted so he tried to stay in his room as much as possible and smash out the intrusive thoughts he had in the Imagination whenever he could. His head was swirling right now as Roman had interrupted him before he had a chance to create and then promptly destroy the thoughts so he was now laying in his room everything smashed to bits and chest hurting as he thought of why Logan would’ve cut him off. He was trying to be good!

He was trying his damn hardest but Logan had been helping him so much so the sudden cut had him dizzy for more than one reason. The only thing he could think that happened was that Logan had found out about his crush and decided to stop interacting with him. The painful thought as well as the others clouding his mind brought him to tears and he didn’t even notice Roman barge into the room until he was being hugged by him. He let himself cry as he was pulled into a warm embrace and his thoughts finally started to calm down. “Oh Rem, tell me what’s wrong?” He heard his brother whisper and he struggled his way through stuttering sobs as he told Roman that he had had a crush on Logan and he must have found out about it because Logan had started pushing him away three weeks ago and his thoughts were getting worse without him because his logic dismantled them and and-

Remus was cut off as Roman squeezed him again and told him he would handle it. Remus nodded and laid back down on his bed as his room playing the damn song he had stuck in his head and only making him cry harder.

“Vacant head in this empty bed yeah I think I’m losing it, I’m pretty sure I’m losing it. It’s messed up nice that you’re my vice and I keep on using it, it’s probably why I’m losing it. Thinking in circles when we’re not together and fighting it won’t make it better…”

Remus cried into his pillow as the song continued and eventually played on a loop, and Roman got ready for a fight.

Roman barged into Logan’s room slamming the door open and sword pointed at the Logical side who was more than shocked to say the least. Not that he showed it. “Roman, what can I help you with?” he asked as he turned to face the creative side. He had been holed up in his room for the better part of the last three weeks only going out for necessity but those time he had seen Remus had his heart racing with unwanted and useless feelings. “Remus is distraught and is declining in health mentally because of whatever you did Microsoft Turd, so I suggest you apologize and at least have the courtesy to keep a professional relationship with him!” He said vehemently and Logan was, well more than confused. “Roman, please elaborate I have no idea what you are talking about and I haven’t even seen Remus for more than a few seconds these past few weeks so I couldn’t have done anything to him.”

Roman paused and seemed to think about something before abruptly sheathing his sword and pulling Patton into the room. Logan looked on as Roman whispered something into Patton’s ear, who then looked over at Logan for a brief second eyes wide before he closed them and seemed to concentrate. His eyes flew open and he nodded to roman who sighed and rubbed his face roughly. “Thank you Padre, I’ll handle it from here.” Was all Logan heard before he was once again alone with the Creative side. Roman took a deep breath before looking at Logan, disheveled and downright messy, eyes bloodshot and hair a mess. He walked closer to Logan who warily accepted this quiet scrutiny. “You’re in love with Remus.”

It was a statement not a question, but Logan tried to deny it anyway. “While I love Remus in a platonic sense, I am not in fact in love with him as you say. I cannot fall in love, I am Logic.” The words burned his throat as he stared down Roman who plopped onto his bed similarly to the way Remus used to do. “Specs, if you forgot, which I am sure you did with the amount of caffeine running through your body at the moment, I am not just creativity. I could sense something was off between you and Rem, but I couldn’t place it until I asked Patton a question. A simple question. Do you know what that question is?”

Roman studied Logan as he thought through what he could have possibly asked Patton, nothing he could think of and yet he had started to panic slightly. He shook his head and looked to Roman who sighed. “You really are out of it aren’t you Lo? I asked Patton if he could sense love coming from you, and when he confirmed that he could it clicked. You’re in love with Remus. You have romantic feelings for him.” Logan stared at Roman with panic in his eyes. He was found out. “Please do not tell Remus.” He finally whispered hands running through his already messy hair. He couldn’t look Roman in the eyes.

“Logan look at me please.” He heard a soft voice request and he looked up at Roman who had moved closer. He put a hand on Logan’s shoulder and squeezed it slightly. “Why are you trying to deny your feelings? Just because you’re logic doesn’t mean you cant have feelings or fall in love with anyone. You aren’t just Logic, you’re also Logan. The nerd who geeks out over space and loves crofters and so many other things. You can have these feelings.”

Logan was trying his best not to tear up but there were unshed tears in his eyes as he listened to what Roman was saying. “But how can I be logic if I have feelings? Feelings are illogical and messy and- and-“ Roman squeezed his shoulder again and Logan looked up into his eyes. “Feelings are a part of being Human teach. You may embody logic, but you are a part of a human and that means that you also can have these feelings. If you didn’t have these feelings that would make you a robot and you are not a robot, no matter how hard you try to be one.”

Logan closed his eyes fighting the tears that wanted to escape. “Even if I do have feelings for Remus, he doesn’t return them. How am I supposed to face him?” he asked, his voice cracking. Roman sighed. “Logan, I know for a fact that Remus likes you back. I didn’t need Patton to tell me, he told me himself. It’s why I came here in the first place. I was gonna fight you for hurting my brother but by the way you looked I had a feeling you were hurting as much as he was. You need to go talk to him Lo. He’s been doing so good with you but when you cut him off everything started spiraling for him. He thinks you hate him for having feelings for you.”

Logan looked at Roman in disbelief, that couldn’t be right but then, thinking back on the few seconds he had seen Remus these past weeks he had seemed to be sad. Oh no. “I messed up didn’t I?” Roman chuckled and stepped away from his friend, “You should go talk to him Lo. I think it’ll work out in the end.” Logan nodded and wiped the tears from his eyes before straightening his tie. “Thank you Roman.” He said before sinking out. Roman chuckled and left the room to go tell the others that everything was gonna be fine.

Logan rose outside of Remus’s door, about to knock when he heard crying. He quickly sunk into the Creative side’s room only to be met by a song being played loudly, permeating the room and intruding his thoughts.

“Bloodshot eyes, no I can’t focus since I let you in. Ever since I let you in. Every high, like a crashing ocean its been sinking in, ever since I let you in” The lyrics pulled at a chord in his chest as he listened to more of the words. “Thinking in circles when we’re not together, If I let you go I’ll be better. I don’t know what I’m chasing, I’m smoking, I’m pacing hours go by like forever, now I’m like-“ He walked further into the room looking for Remus and finally spotted him on top of a broken bed face in the blankets and shoulders shaking. The song continued. “I want you, it’s way too late, I’m restless, I’m wide awake. Every time I lay down I can’t sleep, you’re keeping me up like caffeine.”

Logan walked closer to Remus and gently touched his shoulder. Remus startled and sat up makeup smudged and eyes red and puffy as he looked into Logan’s eyes. “Remus, please stop the music. We need to talk.” Remus scrunched up his face but the music only got louder. “Ah,” Logan muttered before waving his hand and stopping the music. “I’m sorry the song was s-stuck in my head and I c-couldn’t get it out a-and the harder I tried the louder it got.” He said, stuttering through hiccups his voice raw. Logan tentatively sat down next to Remus on the bed and watched as Remus scoot over but didn’t look at him.

“Anyways, what did you need Logie Bear?” he asked trying to sound like his normal self but Logan could hear the pain under his weak façade. Logan reached out for Remus’s hand, slow enough that he could pull away if he wanted to, Logan was happy he didn’t. “I wanted to apologize for how I’ve been acting these past few weeks. I… well I had come to some startling conclusions and decided to try and ignore them but all I did was end up hurting the both of us.” Remus finally looked towards Logan and the hope and pain in his eyes made Logan ache he hadn’t meant to cause Remus any pain, hadn’t known he had the power to but this look flayed him and he knew that he had.

He took a deep breath before continuing. “I had come to the conclusion that I had romantic feelings toward you, but in my hasty decision that I shouldn’t have these feelings I hadn’t taken into consideration the thought that you might feel them as well. I was trying to avoid you so I could stop my feelings from growing, not because I knew you had feelings I did not reciprocate. And I am so sorry for hurting you Remus.”

Remus had fresh tears streaming down his face and he launched himself at Logan. “I thought all those thoughts were about how you couldn’t like me not that you thought you couldn’t like anyone in general!” he exclaimed as he hung onto Logan’s neck head pressed into his neck. Logan was confused for a moment before he remembered that Remus embodied intrusive thoughts as well as creativity. He knew everyone’s intrusive thoughts and fears, and he was able to take them away from the others so the thoughts didn’t affect them, but that meant he was stuck with them looping in his mind until either Logan helped him dismantle them or he killed them enough times. Glancing around the room he realized he hadn’t been able to kill the thoughts yet.

 Logan hugged Remus a little tighter rubbing soothing circles on his back as he let Remus cry, whispering soothing words into his ear. Eventually Remus calmed down and sat back to look at Logan. He sniffed before asking, “So, you have feelings for me Lolo?” He smiled a watery smile but the question was genuine. “Yes.” Logan replied nodding his head in affirmation. Remus squealed and did a whole body wiggle “I like you too Logan.” He said excitement growing with every word. They would have to talk more but both were exhausted so Logan took Remus’s hand and brought him to his room, changing their clothes with a snap and ushered Remus into bed with him. Remus sighed contently as he cuddled with the logical side. “Thank you.” He whispered and Logan smiled and pulled Remus closer.

“You have nothing to be thankful for Remus. Thank you, for putting up with me being irrational.” Remus chuckled softly and tilted his head far enough back to softly kiss Logan’s chin. “Not very logical of you Lo,” he giggled quietly and Logan couldn’t help the small laugh that escaped him as well. “No, it wasn’t. Now sleep cephy, we can talk more in the morning.” He felt Remus freeze for a second before he wiggled happily “I like that name, Cephy. It fits.” Remus manifested his tentacles and took off Logan’s glasses placing them on the bedside table and turning off the lamp before retracting them. Logan was shocked, but exhaustion was taking over. “Remind me to ask you about those when we wake up.” He whispered and felt a nod as he drifted off.

Six months later

 

Logan sat at his desk his laptop open in front of him, but he was just staring at its black screen. He was tired but he had to finish this schedule for Thomas or else he wouldn’t be prepared for the next week of editing and filming. Logan rubbed his bloodshot eyes glasses discarded on the desktop next to the sleeping computer. He startled when he felt arms hug him from behind before he remembered that Remus was in his room with him. “Come to bed Lolo you can do this in the morning.” He whispered, the start of a whine in his voice. Logan leaned his head against Remus’s arm for a few moments before sitting up and sighing.

“Remus, I can’t I have to finish this tonight or else Thomas is going to be set back for days when he needs to be editing and re-filming. I’ll come to bed as soon as I am finished, I promise.” He looked to his boyfriend who had sat on the edge of the bed waiting for whatever it was Logan was going to say, He ran his fingers through his hair and nodded flopping backwards like a starfish. Logan looked at him for a few seconds, a small smile on his face before he yawned. He needed coffee. He stood up and after giving Remus’s leg a squeeze he left his room and went downstairs.

Dating Remus was like nothing he had ever imagined, and yet it was everything he wanted, He smiled again as he thought of his boyfriend. He was a handful sometimes, but he loved him with everything he was. Sometimes, before he and Remus got together he had felt like he was in a vast ocean, untouchable and unfeeling but then he let Remus into his life and suddenly he felt as though he had surfaced the ocean, gasping for breath he hadn’t known he needed. He hadn’t always liked the feeling.

When he had first realized he had feelings for the Duke he had thrown himself into his work ignoring his feelings and avoiding the attractive creative side which was hard considering he had finally been accepted and now resided alongside the rest of them the “dark commons” merged with the light and now they lived with nice shades of grey instead of blinding white or encompassing black. He spent way too long and many, many caffeine fueled nights working on anything and everything that had crossed his desk. But no matter what he did or didn’t do he couldn’t get Remus out of his head. Thoughts circled back to their scant interactions and his heart rate increased every time he seen the creative side but he refused to act on his feelings. He was Logic and logic didn’t have things like feelings (except when he did).

It all came to a head when Roman had barged into his room one day demanding he apologize for whatever he had done to his brother. Logan hadn’t realized that Remus had returned his hidden feelings, or that it was affecting his creativity as well as Thomas. It had taken a while for Roman to convince Logan that Remus cared about him too, Logan had been repressing his feelings for a while not to mention his feelings for Remus, but eventually he was able to confront Remus and admit his feelings. He had never been so scared or so happy than the day they got together. He walked into his room, mug of coffee held tightly and glanced lovingly at his boyfriend. He looked at the time 3:35, before looking back at the bed.

Remus looked so prone and exposed when he slept. He sighed and set his coffee onto the desk next to his laptop before shutting it down. He snapped his fingers and was in his pajamas which consisted of a worn Nasa shirt and some dark grey sweats. He took off his glasses and lay next to Remus who immediately turned around and snugged up to him, head under his chin and hands gripping his shirt. He chuckled softly. “You win my little octopus. I hope you’re happy.” Remus sighed into his chest and smiled before leaning up to kiss Logan's chin. “I am.” He responded softly snuggling closer. Logan kissed the top of his head and squeezed Remus. “I’m glad I let you in.” he whispered softly as he finally drifted off to sleep.

[ancsthctist-archived]

i want this to be the last time i post about this. this is my rp blog, not my personal, so i’m sorry to everyone for all the ooc stuff ive been posting for the last 12 or so hours. i just. need to get this out. 

my young niece, who was named livia (yes, really. no i’m not kidding. and we called her livie or liv) passed away last night after being airlifted to riley hospital. when my brother (her dad) found her, she was black and blue from oxygen deprivation and was convulsing on the floor. she had overdosed on medication, benedryl being among them. i dont know what else was in her system, but the doctors believed there was more in her system than just the benedryl. my sister told me the doctors believed she was without oxygen for 30 minutes. and it was then that i knew she wouldn’t survive, and yet i still hoped against hope that perhaps they were wrong. that she’ll bounce back. the extent of my denial last night was indescribable. and it was only two hours later that she told me she was gone.

she was 14 years old. and she was a goofball growing up. i adored the fuck out of that kid who has gone through so much bullshit in her life, that i’m brought immediately to the fear that this was a suicide.

i’m begging, pleading to any god out there that it was an accident. that she didn’t mean to take whatever cocktail she took. i saw her and hung out with her briefly just a month ago. and while she seemed quiet and tired, i didn’t really get the sense that anything was deeply wrong. but some people who are suicidal are exceptionally good at hiding things. because of my own background of emotional neglect and abuse, i have an extremely hard time reaching out to and being with my family. it is so hard for me to connect (or even be in the same room) as family members because i literally do not feel like a person next to them. and it’s because of these feelings that i failed as an aunt in reaching out to my nieces and nephews after the trauma they’ve undergone (my brother’s wife and my sister’s husband had an affair, causing divorces across the board, with my sister’s then-ex-husband dying and my brother, the genius that he is, didn’t get his kids the help and attention they sorely needed. im not blaming my brother for her passing, but those kids needed help. and he refused to get them therapy and all but neglected them. they were not fine then, and they are not fine now. and now one of them is gone.)

livia was a good kid. she was so good. and sweet. and funny. and adorable. and fuck it fucking hurts to lose her. especially the way she went. i’m praying that it was an accident because i can’t bear the thought of her being in such a dark and painful and lonely place that would make her want to take her own life and not just want to but actually do it. and not just do it but actually succeed. please let this be an accident. i realize this is all an exercise in futility, torturing myself into believing that i should have done more, i should have been better. should-haves don’t change the fact that she’s gone. it won’t bring her back. her star has flickered out and it will never be replaced.

i dont want to hear “she’s in a better place” or “she’s no longer in pain”. she shouldn’t have been in pain to begin with. she was a child. she should have been out with her friends and having fun and doing school stuff. high school sucks yes but it’s survivable. being a teenager fucking sucks, i know. but she shouldn’t have been in that kind of despair. no one deserves to go through that. i nearly offed myself this year, twice, and i pray that no one ever has to feel those feelings. and the possibility of this bubbly girl going through that tears me to pieces.

sorry for posting all of this here. i didnt want to flood my twitter feed, nor did i feel like i had any right to post this on facebook, so here it is. hidden but laid bare. the maelstrom of emotions i’m feeling is making me physically ill, so i think i will go lay down for a while.

[idk-my-aesthetic]

isle kingdom au

so i’ve had this idea for an AU for a little while, but i don’t wanna actually write anything for it until i’m done w/ my current descendants wips, but i also wanna talk about it lol so ig im making a post? please send me asks about it i wanna talk about it.... anyway

**tw for child abuse and semi-graphic descriptions of violence.

basically the premise of the au is that even though he tried to get it passed at first, ben never went through with pulling the vks off the isle. he kept meaning too, but it just kept being pushed to the back of his list of priorities bc he was so busy w/ being king and never happened 

so bc of this, the core 4 stayed on the isle and never got off it. if you’ve read the stuff in my keep them close series u probably have a better idea of my hc of the isle, but the basics of it are that 1) most of the parents are really bad and abusive + the conditions are disgusting 2) none of the kids are really evil and 3) the vks are all kinda frenimes/rivals and will work together to keep eachother alive even if they act like they hate eachother or will even hurt eachother

so, in the ‘canon’ timeline before going to auradon the core 4 are a gang and slowly gaining power. they’re already the top of the vk gangs and are like gaining on some of the adult ones.

bc they never go to auradon, they just kinda keep doing what they already are and gain more and more power. but, as they gain power their parents start becoming afraid of them and acting like more abusive in attempts to keep the core 4 under their control 

ok bare w/ me for this next bit bc it’s gonna sound real ooc for like a sec then make sense

so, as they’re gaining power and their parents are haveing more and more trouble controlling them their parents are becoming more and more violent.

im not sure on the order yet, but basically cruella, jafar, eq, and malifacent all do something like really really bad to their respective kid, so one of the other core 4 kills them bc like. yeah. 

i have some vauge ideas of what each of them could have done and i don’t really know if i want to say them or even use them tbh bc they’re like.... bad, like real bad. which they kinda have to be, you know? bc like.... none of the core 4 would turn to killing if they didn’t have a real good reason, and their parents continuing the abuse that they always have woulden’t be enough, so the parents would have to do something really really bad for one of the others to justify killing them 

its important to mention that none of them kill their own parent. it’s always one of the other 4, im not sure who kills who just yet, but none of them kill their own parent. They’re saved from their parents by each other and they never really have any confrontation with their parents (which will change l8r 👀👀, let me explain)

Even tho they didn’t kill their own parents, everyone kinda assumed they did in order to take their places/gain power. A handful of their friends know the real story, but it’s mostly kept under wraps and it’s like general “knowledge” that they killed their parents for power. They’re not really hiding it or anything, I mean they did still each kill one of the 4 most powerful villains so it’s not like anyone is gonna be less afraid if they knew the truth. ppl just make assumptions and never really question them and they just let ppl think what they do

So bc their parents are dead and they let everyone assume they killed their own parent they very easily climb up the ranks and end up in charge of the isle bc atp they’re seen as the most ruthless/evil/powerful

So now that they’re in charge of the isle they start like..... actually making it a livable place. Ofc at first they try to make a version of Carlos’s machine to break the barrier, but they can’t get it to work so he just modifys it to steal magic from the barrair for them to use. (Another idea stolen from my keep them close series but like I like the idea lol)

And when I say they make it a livable place I mean they start doing stuff like building water purifiers, making like safe houses, establishing some kind of working economy, taking control of the barge drop offs and how everything is distributed, fixing broken electricity, etc etc

A lot of what they do is based off of Carlos’s machines and designs, which like obvi other ppl are helping him gather materials and for and build, since he has power bc he’s like one of the ppl in charge. And he like teaches other ppl how to do what he does and fix anything that goes wrong

Evie kinda puts herself in charge of setting up like medical centers + homes for kids and stuff. Also some kinda way to grow food. B4 they’re in charge nothing can really grow but they use the magic they steal from the barrier to make stuff grow. And evie can use it to make like lots of healing items and such

Jay ends up mostly in charge of like collecting and distribution of their recourses. At first like the barge is kinda a hugeeee problem to deal with bc ppl are fighting over the like moldy food and destroyed clothes and stuff. But eventually they get it organized and have stuff sent to the respective place it should, like clothes and scrap fabric are sent to a place that repairs and sells them, parts and electronics are sent to Carlos or his helpers, etc

Other minor vks like Celia, dizzy, the sea three, Diego, etc are all in this two but this is already really long so just know they’re like helping and like pretty high ranking/highly regarded. Send me an ask with questions please

Mal is kinda regarded as the ultimate leader/queen of the isle ig even though the other 3 have basically the same amount of power. Mostly bc her job ends up being keeping the adults who dislike them inline and keeping their power as heads of the isle

Most ppl are just kinda chill w/ them being in charge, especially a lot of the ppl who were banished for minor crimes. A few of the adult villains try to fight them and end up dead lol, and anyone caught doing especially bad things, like r*pe, hurting someone they shouldn’t have, being a child abuser, etc will end up killed by mal or one of the others. They don’t kill u for like every crime obviously only the like inexcusable ones. Stuff like stealing or mental illness or w/e they basically just help you work through

They’re aren’t any like real laws ig but they deal with issues as they go and give harsh punishments if needed. It serves to keep themselves seen as strong/evil/powerful despite all the good they do and helps keep others too afraid to challenge them. Like frollo isn’t going to challenge them if Ursula tried the same thing and got killed. (The fact that she abused uma and her siblings obviously had nothing to do with that,,,,,,,,,,,)

So yeah! They basically turned the isle into a inhabitable place in the years that they spent as its leaders, and it functions as its own kinda kingdom despite its harsh and confusing laws/rules

But we ain’t done yet, lol

Basically everything I’ve just explained is.... mostly backstory? Kinda? It’s the type of thing where you slowly find out about all this stuff while they actual story goes on, but I figured it’d be less confusing to explain it first :3

So the Actual story starts a few years after when Ben originally was supposed to take the vks off the isle. He, all the other princess/princes he want to school with, the core 4, the sea 3, etc are all in their mid to early 20s.

Auradon has basically no clue what’s the deal w/ the isle. They’re only interaction w/ them is through the like goblins that bring over the trash barges, but those guys are chill and basically don’t tell the aks anything lol.

So Ben is ruling his kingdom, and the core 4 are ruling their own, both sides are doing pretty well and ignoring each other, but then! All of a sudden there’s these sudden deaths/fires/some kinda terrorist attack on the outskirts of the kingdom.

I haven’t thought through this part too much, but basically he knows that they’re is some kinda threat, but he doesn’t know excatly what it is. All he does know is that the villain that is attacking is demanding to speak to the children of malifecent, jafar, cruella devil, and the evil queen.

He basically rounds up the heroes of those respective stories bc they’re all being threatened in some way or another. The mystery villain continues to do more damage and seems basically impossible to beat, and has given them a time limit b4 they’ll go and start destroying more

They discuss their options and decide their best plan is to go to the isle and convince them core 4 to help, bringing along the heroes and some of the main aks w/ them

Obviously it doesn’t go well bc they show up and mal basically has them arrested lmao

Again I have more in-depth ideas for this part but this post is already wayyyy to long so I’m trying to hurry and finish up

The talk, vks meet their respective heroes, everything is from ak/hero POV so as they explore the isle and talk to the core 4 and other vks they slowly find out about all ^^^ that stuff up there

The core 4 are eventually agree, and they go to face the villains only to find out its their parents who have been resurrected!!!! Fuck!!!!

Idk how or why just yet lmao but I will soon

Parents are obvi pissed, core 4 face their own parents and finally get like some kinda closer or smthn idk I feel like y’all get the gist

in the end auradon agknolages the isle as its own kingdom and the core 4 as its leaders and open trade/remove the barrier so the isle can continue to grow bc it’s been struggling due to lack of recourses

And that’s like the basic outline of my au! I wanna write it eventually but tbh I’m expecting eventually to be like 3 years from now bc of how much other stuff I have so for rn I’m just gonna blog about it. Obviously there’s a lot of other stuff/plots/emotional arcs etc I didn’t talk about bc like This Post Is So Long I’m So Sorry, So please please please send me asks/questions/comments/even your own ideas!!! Please. Everything about this will be tagged with “isle kingdom au” :3

[barewiings]

BAREWIINGS’ RP PLOTTING CHEAT-SHEET

Want new-and-exciting plots for your character? Long to reach out to more of your followers, but don’t know where to start? Fear not! Fill out this form and give your RP partners both present and future all the of juicy jumping off points they need to help you get your characters acquainted.

Be sure to tag the players whose characters YOU want more cues to interact with, and repost, don’t reblog! Feel free to add or remove sections as you see fit. Template here.

Mun name: birdie (she/her/hers or they/them)  OOC Contact: tumblr IMs + discord

Who the heck is my muse anyway:

leah’s a sophomore in college studying psychology. she works on her campus’ bookstore during the week, and she’s just super friendly and approachable. wants to fall in love real badly ( it doesn’t help that she’s a hopeless romantic ), and just wants to be helpful to everyone. gets stressed out easily because of her assignments and is very anxious a lot of times about little things. 

Points of interest:

one the surface, leah seems pretty innocent, but there’s definitely a part of her she hides really well, especially to her very religious and traditional family. she’s very sexual in nature, working in a sex shop on the weekends. she hooks up frequently, uses tinder regularly, and she knows what she likes in the bedroom thanks to lots of time alone with some toys. she doesn’t like being open about this side of her life right away, but to those close to her, she’ll open up eventually.

this all started at an early age, about around five thanks to some porn she accidentally found. since then, it’s been a back and forth battle between her sexuality and her religion ( or rather, her family’s religion ), and it’s only up until recently did she decided that enjoying sex isn’t a sin. 

What they’ve been up to recently:

trying to date without her parents knowing, finding sexual partners that don’t suck, studying for classes, writing papers, working shifts at both of her jobs, facetiming her parents, cleaning her dorm, missing her cat. 

Where to find them:

on campus, in her dorm room, at the sex shop or in the bookstore. 

Current plans:

trying to graduate tbh but also enjoy her time in college. wants to make new connections while she has this new independence from her parents even though she’s a nervous bean around strangers sometimes 

Desired interactions:

hateships -- leah gets along with a lot of people, so it’d be very interesting for her to meet someone who just rubs her the wrong way and brings out the passive-aggressive self 

toxic relationships -- unhealthy, possessive, emotionally draining, and all those types of things

angst -- just give me angst in general, make leah cry, put her in stressful situations. i really want to explore this side of her since so far everything’s been sunshine and rainbows. which isn’t bad!!! but leah does have some baggage that hasn’t really been discussed yet ( nothing traumatic, but her self-worth can be kind of low and she can be fake when the situation calls for it since she bottles up emotions ). 

more au’s!!!! more plots from my wishlist!!! 

Offered interactions:

i offer you leah as a sales associate at either of her jobs, leah as a potential classmate, leah as a potential one night stand, leah as that person who runs after you when you drop something. tbh leah’s pretty flexible so she can fit into a lot of situations, and even for more niche situations, we can always plot! for now i only have two verses: one that’s modern and one that has the potential to be a period au set in the great depression era ( you’ll get it if you read my verse page! )  

Current open post/s:

here’s my tag! it’s not much, and most are short since i don’t really do opens that often ( and idk what exactly is in there but they’re either silly or smutty sorry not sorry ) 

Anything else:

my schedule’s wack bc i’m a full time student, so i hoard a lot of drafts but i love memes and usually get to them pretty quickly so feel free to send them in to start interactions!! you’re always welcome to continue them ( even smutty ones ) so dont feel shy!! 

Tagged by: stolen from @awolxsiblings

Tagging: you!!! 

[daeneryses]

so

here’s what i think abt the episode

it wasnt as BAD as it seemed it would be but that doesnt mean it was good but my expectations were so fucking low that i could sort of enjoy it. 

but well lets unpack that shit

it began alright, the funeral was emotional, not much to be done there i suppose. jon’s speech was good. nothing spectacular. 

then the feast, which was also okay. but here begins one of my most serious concerns. what the fuck is up with sansa? in past episodes i could see her point, the north has been betrayed too much, it has bled too much, and southern rulers don’t quite get the north. but at the feast she was straight up dropping attitude towards dany, like damn girl aren’t u supposed to be a diplomatic figure in order to be a political mastermind? but well i’ll rant more about that later on. also dany legitimizing gendry was something we all saw coming i believe (even before the leaks i mean lmao) and it was a smart choice on her behalf really bc as tyrion pointed out gendry would never betray her, out of pure gratefulness if anything.

the feast lasted a lot lmao am i the only one who feels that way? 

we started to see dany drifting from jon bc for some reason my tiny brain cannot comprehend people seem to want him as a king and she know he could be king if the truth gets out (WHICH DESERVES A WHOLE ASS POST TO RANT). she also sees tyrion laughing with jaime and brienne and i just felt so bad for her? like everyone was ignoring her she was clearly uncomfortable there ;( maybe it just hit too close home ahah. Anyway, I understand her becoming wary, and i understand why she doesn’t want anyone to know abt jon’s parentage. which, ofc, jon doesn’t give a flying fuck so we end up in a very bad place (which, again, i’ll talk more abt later on)

i was pretty nervous abt the gendrya breakup ahah but it really wasnt that bad, i didnt really see it as a breakup as much as a  “c ya later” and im allowing myself to be hopeful for them. they’re both clearly very much in love but my boy’s a whole ass clown if he thought she’d say yes THAT quickly.

but im actually nervous about arya’s fate??? did she even say goodbye to sansa? bran? what the fuck was that??? she really plans to kill cersei and i just have a feeling in my HEART that she’s not gonna make it out alive and she won’t succeed either. why would u have her lecture jon abt the importance of family if she’s just going to clock out the next day. ALSO what the fuck was that line of her never returning to WF????? 

??????????????????????????????????????????????????

if she dies im gonna become a full blown alcoholic. its even worse if she dies by the mountain or some stupid shit like that.

anyways

lets fast forward shall we

when they were at the war council room (idk the name im sorry) SANSA WAS STILL PROVOKING DANY. WHAT THE HELL? was it ever explained why she distrusts her? or are we just supposed to go with it? i loved that jon for once in his life stood up for her. she lost so much, she lost her khalasar, she lost most of her unsullied, she lost JORAH. and you don’t even want to send men to fight a much less scary enemy? gtfo here. i have always always always loved sansa, and i could see where she came from when she initially didn’t trust dany, but this? dany gave them everything and more, what do they want from her. im also emo bc i always thought dany and arya would get along :( and now im wearing a clown costume. 

then the jon’s dumbass who’s a targaryen but inherited ned stark’s ability to disclose very sensible information at the WORST possible timing goes “hey, u know what will make them be at peace with dany ruling? knowing that i’m a secret targ and i can be king instead of her ahah :)x” and tells them. which, ofc, has many many consequences.

god they really are setting everything up for dany going nuts i hate this i hate this so much

everyone is plotting behind her back. that sneaky little treacherous rat varys is going to get dracarysed very soon and i will REJOICE. 

and i truly fail to see why, all of a sudden, varys doesn’t want her on the throne. i cannot see what she has done wrong, and i mean this. if it’s all bc she burned down the tarlys i s2g.... if this was all done properly, if this was well written, if dany had truly started to show signs of madness, i would not be complaining. but the second she suggests using heavy force on KL to end the war once and for all, she is MAD!!!1111! aerys reborn!11!!! get the fuck outta here w that im fuming

but well im just rambling now. we all know that rhaegal survived a fight with his undead brother but died bc apparently NO ONE saw the massive fleet that was somehow hiding behind a rock. god i wish i was joking this sounds like bad fanfiction. also they killed missandei just for the lulz apparently and to give us what they believe will be a justified reason for dany going mad. thanks i hate it.

the way she said dracarys though ;___; she wants dany to obliterate the whole lot of them.

also the show really sad fuck jaime lannister huh. 

like, it’s the same shit guys. amazing episode if you look at the technical aspects, the music was great as usual, the photography is impressive, it feels like you’re watching a blockbuster movie not a TV show and that definitely counts for something, but the story is simply not good anymore. they are crushing everything they’ve built up to this point character-wise. everyone’s acting so so so ooc it’s unbelievable, and sadly i can only see one way for the “story” they have begun to tell us. they are going to destroy the single most important character of the show, the most ICONIC character in the story of TV, one of the most beloved characters of our times, and turn her into a monster just so jon can save the day. if that ain’t trash writing, idk what is. 

i also want to point out how great the cast is. it amazes me each episode. this time in particular emilia was amazing.

i guess that’s the sad part, that this show has it all to be the best of the best, but they decided to butcher the story, which cannot be saved, no matter how amazing your crew, cast, and production is.