#im sorry this is so depressing yall
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SAGESUNE MIKU >:DDD
#i rise from the dead once again!!#sorry about the long periods of time in between me posting#school is absolutely kicking my ass right now and i havent had any time to draw the creatures :(#ive also just been feeling unsatisfied with my art as of late#its probably just too much time online looking at other peoples art making me feel bad about myself#even though im improving as fast as i can it doesnt feel like im getting any better#but i know from experience that that feeling doesnt go away with time#so i guess ill always see flaws in my art no matter how hard i try to get better#man. that got really depressing :/#anyways SAGE!!! i love her she is my favorite of all time and im going to draw her so much yall dont even KNOW :D#ive got tons of other stuff planned too so watch out >:3#i could hit you guys with 6 paragraphs of au lore any day now#sonic the hedgehog#sage robotnik#AWWWHHHGG SHE HAS HER OWN LITTLE TAG IM SOBBING#anyways#sage sonic#hatsune miku#i guess#whoof im scared to post this#or maybe im just exhausted#probably both :/
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finally out of that god damn artblock, its time for serizawaaaaaaa
#yall ive been pleading begging kicking the walls to draw him this whole time#how can you not expect me to want to draw him... thats actually cruel#oh yea the smoking seri doodles are part of this idea of him kinda... relapsing and picking up bad habits... im so sorry seri!!!!#never let me come up with ideas while im depressed smh#mp100#my art#mob psycho 100#serizawa katsuya#sketches#cw smoking
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I want that wet cat man so bad
#art#help#im sad rn#idk what tags to use#traditional art#traditional drawing#traditional artist#arcane silco#arcane fanart#arcane#silco fanart#silco#im depressed#i need him#I also need sleep but I’m still not getting that either#i want him#I also want a will to live but here we are#i’m so tired#i’m sorry#i’m going insane#i’m just a girl#I’m writing this at 2am#i’m bored#i might be ovulating#sorry yall
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I want to take out my heart
Rip it out of my chest and lay it on a table for display
See me.
Feel my emotions, hear the pumping, the thumping, the beating of my heart.
Watch me
It'll bleed out onto the table
The red dancing and painting my memories, my thoughts
Beautifully dark pictures of my life, my very essence
Exposed to the world
Painted out on the table
The floor
And the bottom of your shoe.
#i uh. am mentally unwell.#this poem is about ART.#the whole idea was that we want to create art that resonates with people. we want the art we make to envoke emotion and to feel like we are#--scooping out our guts essentially so that the audience can FEEL what we mean. i want my art to impact people.#yall im just a sappy artsy boy#one of us started crying and begged for a poem about blood to be written#i shouldnt have edited the original rant#it was quite beautiful but im dumb#sorry im depressing lol#no toads were harmed in the making of this post#toad is a poet
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Spreading some love and appreciation today!! Who are some of your best friends in the fandom and what’s something you love about them? 🩵
OMG so sorry for the late response!!!!! But I haven't spoken to them since forever (cause I'm supes busy) BUT shoutout to these guys they're amazing
@passionartx - They're literally so creative and amazing!!! Always got some of the best ideas and she's the sweetest omg- you shoukd check her out!! (She has awesome art btw)
@myymi - literally so annoying and kitsunami in irl but I love em!!! CHECK OUT THEIR FICS they're awesome and so well written- like if u need Tails angst their the one to go to!!!
@nblatinotails - I FUCKING LOVE THIS BITCH- love her transformers art it's so cool and amazing pls check em out and they have like super awesome ideas and shit
And I've only got 3- I feel like such a loser for only having 3 friends (pls I need more art friends 🙏)
#this has been sitting in my inbox for months IM SO SORRY ive been busy and dying and depressed#but im productive now so we up#imma spam my account rn cause i wanna answer these aks!! But ty#pls ask more if yall want#miles tails prower#sonic the hedgehog#sonic fandom#tails the fox#sonic#sth
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I've been thinking and thinking. Call me a researcher or just a stranger. And something's been gnawing on my mind.
I didn't know Herobrines could reproduce let alone be female. There's an overabundance in males and females are a rarity from my observation. That is such an odd thing. Not to mention that Herobrines don't really- reproduce. Of course with exceptions, but the cases I know do it rather traditionally.
Your mother- (likely a brine all the same - as you describe yourself one too) Your mother produced children by spreading spores of some kind. Some parts of herself I guess. A power to mend into the elements and create another living being in such a way is baffling.
To get to the point and my actual question.
I've been pondering- spreading Herobrine offspring on such a wide scale (as you mentioned you had plenty of siblings) and seemingly not weakening herself if she could do that en mass. Maybe it's less of making more Brines from herself but something more akin to Brine-Spawns. (like vampire-spawns- a weaker kind of vampire sprung from a true one)
With that odd thought- you are the child of a Herobrine, but not a full brine yourself? Do you think that is kinda true?
Brines are such a rarity, your mother releasing tousands of offspring into the world and them being true Brines seems a little unreasonable.
Of course I may be mistaken as every elusive indivitual of a brine works different than the next. Maybe you and your "species" aren't actual brines by many a definition from each their own flaws.
Ah..... I've been talking a lot. What do you think about this whole- thing? Maybe you know more than I do. Probably.
#whoever you are this ask makes my day thanks for being a champ and i hope my answer does it justice!!#mcss#mcaskblog#herobrine#steven#sigma#lore#somewhat ooc?#SORRY FOR NERDING OUT THIS POST PROBABLY MAKES LITTLE SENSE BUT I FEEL SO STRONGLY ABOUT THIS THING#basically I have crazy imagination and i thought of all this lore that i didnt use because it's a little too... nonsensical#also the scope got way too big#and im not that invested to the story to dedicate my time and make a shonen comic outta it#plus Mother is a triggering character and i dont want this blog to get too depressing#so theres a lot of lore setups but no payoffs IM SO SORRY#but i think blog's already p lore biology heavy as it is so this is all yalls gonna get#before it gets even more confusing#Steven is an alien's kid!! congrats!! :D
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okie im going to BED because i had an exhausting day walking thru london heathrow airport a bajillion times just to not make it anywhere but <3 ily guys and tysm for just. being here. and being kind to me. it means like, more than u know fr
#im just a little guy#also i think im almost done w lexapro withdrawals so i will hopefully stop being an annoying depressed little shit.#sorry yall had to witness that
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"bedrotting is a privilege because i dont have the time to bed rot. when i get home from work im excited that i get to bed rot" Do yall know what that word means
#like srsly#idk if i can rlly talk for this#bcos everytime theres conversation abt this it has to do with paying bills and all that#and i dont have to do that yet#but like for me i spent months almost always in bed#i wasnt even on my phone most of the time#i just lied there thinking abt how to kms and occasionally crying or sleeping#and i got rlly behind in school bcos i didnt do anything for months#and it rlly did fuck up my life#heavily#so idk for all the “bed rotting is a privilege” discourse#i see so many ppl talking abt it like it's just relaxing#and if yall are going to argue abt this can yall atleast know what it means??#like sure yall can have that conversation but atleast know what youre talking abt#and also is it even smthn worth talking abt#idk if it's mean but like what's the point in pointing out that bedrotting is a privilege if it is??#like genuinely#and also alot of the discourse runs on the idea that it doesnt mess up anyone's life and while im not completely sure if i count#bcos im not an adult that pays bills#but like idk i think it does#ik most discourse is stupid#but i dont understand the point of that one anyway#like yeah i guess?? maybe?? if we're assuming that the depressed or disabled person doesnt have their life completely fucked up by it#maybe??#idk. who does it help by saying that a person who can hardly get out of bed is privileged#maybe there is a point to it that im just not thinking of rn#and im sorry for being rlly shortsighted if i am#but like??#i dont understand someone being unable to bedrot bcos itd fuck up their life? bcos like?? yeah that's what it does#maybe i have the wrong definition here bcos im seriously confused
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walking past the "todays reccomended book" shelf in the works and seeing its tsats i think im gonna throw up
#depressing that 8-13 year olds are gonna grow up thinking thats what its like to be gay#now obviously im not very strong on the mlm side of things#but go read iron widow by xiran jay zhao if you want some good queer ya omg#im so sorry yall im a tsats hater
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my boyfriend is trans, mtf but doesn't like that i consider my sexuality sapphic. what do i do? doesn't sapphic also apply to trans men?
Ah.
Another advice ask😓
Yall i appreciate that some of you feel comfortable asking me for relationship advice or that you might be comfortable here since im an anonymous stranger etc
HOWEVER, let me be straight up honest with you— i havent ever been in an actual relationship, im a MAJOR shut in so i’m not at all up to date with all the minutiae of the queer community, full on i have averaged leaving the house one (1) single time PER MONTH for the last FIVE months
I do not want to give you bad/naive/shortsighted advice
And i promise you do not want my bad advice
I am begging you Please do not ask me for advice i am so stressed
#asks#im so sorry i dont have a response to this#it sounds like something you and your partner need to discuss#i really don’t know what to say#giving advice is something that i honestly take pretty seriously#and i really just don’t like doing it when i don’t know much about the topic or situation#so while i DO appreciate people feeling comfortable asking me things#i unfortunately DON’T feel comfortable answering#and this goes for pretty much any advice ask#if you want tips for like how many blankets to use or like how to write an essay that’s about all i got here#airing out all my current major flaws to show yall how unqualified i am#srry i am not a beautiful bookstore customer meeting your eyes across the room#i am at home being Depressed™️#yall do not want advice from me i am BEGGING you to realize you do not want advice from me#also putting myself down to make a Point™️ promise im good!!#also also very sorry i couldn’t give advice AND it’s a late response anon i hope you find what you’re looking for soon!
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#oc art#yall im freaking depressed so yall not gonna get any hermitcraft art in a while okay?#artists on tumblr#digital art#young artist#art on tumblr#i wanna kill myslef.#srs#i love my oc#hes my pookie#my mental health is getting worse#im sorry
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sorry look if sth isnt harming me i try to stay in my own lane but rapid-onset gender dysphoria on that MUD/"coined disorder" archive you know thats a transphobic invention right? you know that's just transphobia, right? that specific term. it's transphobic. and some of yall are using it LEGITIMATELY????? im going to lose it.
#im sorry i can never take you seriously if u use this. its just fucking gender dysphoria. its JUST gender dysphoria.#'rapid onset' shut the FUCK up. shut the fuck up#i have no patience for some of yall for real. get offline.#< none of this is in a 'these people arent trans' way this is in a 'my transphobic mother accused me of being a victim of ROGD in the same#conversation where she accused me of faking my suicide attempt bc i wasnt hospitalized.' way#in a 'this woman is so brainrotted and hateful she accused me of mutilating myself by getting gender-affirming care at the same time as she#very seriously told me i was faking my depression and then accused one of my friends of influencing me to be trans.' way#you just have fucking gender dysphoria it is not that hard to leave off the 'rapid onset' transphobic part. drop two fucking words!!#'rapid onset gender dysphoria is a medically unrecognized disorder!!' im so serious log off and shut up.#im not about to make a whole new post for it bc its not worth the mental energy but also DONT FUCKING USE WH*** IF YOURE NOT A SEX WORKER#ITS NOT THAT HARD.
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See a viscera playlist: Yahoo! Songs about tearing apart!
[Open the playlist. Underwhelming pop music about giving away your body in the name of love. Close playlist.]
#i want songs about teeth and claws and bass and drums and screaming!!!!!#i dont remember how that meme goes. uhm. its like#[see body horror playlist]: but is it about gore and teeth or is it about obsession?#[playlist maker]: its a body horror playlist#[opens the playlist. its about obsession]#NOOOOO. i want playlists about werewolves and bones cracking and blood spilling! not these soft rock painfully underwhelming barely comprehe#nsible songs about giving yourself away to your crush. GRRRRRAGH. i want a song where you turn into a giant bug! where you get turned into#an arcade cabinet! a song that describes the pain and horror of a werewolves first transformation!!!!! monster music!!!!!!!!!!#sad boy soft rock about how your crush cannibalizes you is sooo. Underwhelminggggg it hurts. we Get It. you want to be consumed by love or#whatever. WHO CARES. 100 werewolf transformation spell !!!#i want heavy metal ballads about how you become something undecipherable! not how you're soooooo softcore depressed little special guy :((((#you have a crush? thats cool. i have eight legs and twelve eyes and claws that can cut through steel and three rows of teeth.#i didnt click on jt cuz my headphones died but what the fuck is meatcore also. that showed up in my scrollbar. yall will out anything in#front of -core and think it means anything.#'im sooo body horror visceral meatcore! [listens exclusively to mother mother and those stupid playlists that are always titled like.#soft boy rage.]'#KILLING KILLING KILLING KILLING#sorry#no offense but your music taste is so under stimulating i kind of. want to tear my eyes out. is that meat viscera gorecoded boy rage enough
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gonna talk about kaveh thru the tags in case people dont wanna get spoiled
#also not tagging the kaveh tag in case someone forgot to block the tag due to spoilers#kaeyachi randoms#so anyway here we go#wtf is that back story why is it so painful#its incredibly realistic as well coz that can happen irl#also since we are going to fontaine i genuinely wonder if kaveh has a half-sibling there that will become a playable character someday#imagine the angst hnghh#loathe his mother so much sorry shes depressed but that has never been an excuse to be a POS#i have the same opinion about huffman btw like yes life is tough but who tf leaves a kid alone to do all the housework while u drink#even his specialty food has a backstory can yall believe it?#someone really enjoyed writing kaveh. good for him#now i have 2 depressed alcoholic babygirls who have a hard time accepting love and affection because they dont think it will last#what does that say about me when i kin them? who knows. im just a random internet person with specific tastes apparently#kaeya and kaveh meet and just start supporting eachother pls#they would be besties fr coz they would know how to ease eachothers troubles#kaeya and kaveh: no home? same. cheers to that mate#kaeyas bio dad and kavehs bio mom sweating as they feel kaeya and kaveh fans curse them to hell and back
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#yall im so sorry for being so inactive#my personal life has been so fucking stressful lately#i havent had time to be online or to rest#and my anxiety and depression is through the roof rn#ive been really overwhelmed and havent been online so sorry to all my followers/mutuals#i hope yall are doing okay 💕
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wgoin enjoyers wya. [rattles you around like a jar of marbles]
#i know its literally almost been a year and im so sorry#2023 was literally me speedrunning all the Canon Youth Events™ i missed bc i was too busy being depressed. like making friends#among other things. LMFAO.#twas a bit insane#things r normalising now tho#and this fucking chapter#that has been HAUNTING ME FOR THE WHOLE YEAR#is finally nearing completion#it might not be good.#well. some parts of it i really like actually#but the smut scene got edited so many times then changed entirely bc i fucking gave up dude i cannot anymore#now im just committing to what ive got even if i dont like it anymore i just need this chapter fucking POSTED n GONE#i realise my standards for myself are insanely fucking high so i could release this chapter feeling ass abt a couple scenes#n yall will probably not thing its any worse than the rest of it#thing is i write this more for Me than anyone else which is the problem but fuck it Me wants this chapter Finished so i can move on lmfaooo#HOPEFULLY i can finish it within the week#no promises tho lmfao#mischiefing time#what goes on in neverland
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