#im sorry if that offends you but like
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I'm looking for someone to write a Micah fic where the reader is dead/ he kills her and he starts having sex with her corpse. All the best, thanks.
im sorry what
also no. that person ain't me honey
did you even read my rules?
as much as i think its true that the only way micah would ever get to sleep with a woman is if she was dead because he's just that repulsive... i'd never actually write something like this.
That's wild bro
#what the hell#no wonder you're on anon man#read the rules#rules#i reserve the right to refuse to write whatever i want#im sorry if that offends you but like#its in my rules that i won't write something like this#also maybe get some help?#I write dark themes but this is a bit much even for me
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like idk it just seems actually nefarious to take one of the very few widely known instances of queerness in older history being a symbol to show queer people that we've always existed and aren't alone for CENTURIES and taking away the queerness from it. like. i know some people say that ''the queerness isnt important in the book" which i mean in my opinion i could go off for 10k words in an essay as to how basil's love for dorian is integral to the story BUT EVEN APART from that its really just. having a real explicitly queer character in such an old and widely regarded classic novel is HUGE for queer history and this is just. literally like. its 2024. why are you doing queer erasure to DORIAN GRAY
#MAKE YOUR OWN SHIT OR LIKE GET OUTTT#WHAT????#also not the cishets going ''omggg queer people are predatory enough so it shouldnt change it to ship incest now" WHAT??????#girl do you see. what you are doing. girl. @ the creator#why do they let these people make adaptations. what the actual hell#amory rambles#SORRY IM LITERALLY LIKE ACTUALLY SO LIKE. DEEPLY OFFENDED RN WHICH IS LIKE SUCH A WORD TO USE I KNOW BUT LIKE#ITS ALL I CAN THINK OF TO SAY BECAUSE WHAT. THE HELL.#as an anthropology/creative writing major the importance of having these types of evidences of queer culture in history so far back#is something insurmountable in validating queerness#and to take that and like. oh my goddd#like i could go off for ages about even queer authors that arent so widely known as queer/didnt write explicitly queer things like gogol#who are erased to a point where you have to dig to learn about his history because its been so covered up by people trying to erase us#and like#in the year 2024 dear fucking lord!!#what are we doing???#sorry my dfjlksdfjsdf dfih8sojidfk s. sidhfojl kmsdf . im so actually mad right now LMAOOO#the picture of dorian gray#dorian gray#oscar wilde#tpodg#and like tpodg isnt even one of my favorite novels like i like it a lot but i see it as so fucking important#anywho#so glad we are all being loud as hell about this bc thats the way to make this mfer take notice
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MAJOR HADES 2 SPOILERS BUT...
FIRST SPOTTING OF ZAGREUS!! MY BOY 😭😭😭😭😭
also is Achilles (who is a SHADE btw) such a threat that Chronos froze him in time too??? LET HIM AND HIS HUSBAND HAVE THEIR HAPPY EVER AFTER FFS
#like all i can imagine is achilles leaving Patroclus in Elysium to work a shift at the house AND HE JUST NEVER RETURNS???#PATROCLUS IM SO SORRY WHY DO THE GODS HATE YOU#im also proud of my boy zagreus for leading the (maybe) attack on Chronos#and im pretty sure Thanatos is frozen right behind Achilles#(along with meg and dusa and persephone ofc)#which would explain why the entire surface world is fucked#but im just so offended that he froze a SHADE#LET HIM BE WITH PATROCLUS FFS#hades 2#hades 2 spoilers#zagreus#achilles#patroclus#thanatos#melinoe#hades#spoilers#also sorry for the poor quality photo lmao#hades spoilers
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on god im always excited when ppl get into my interests but the sole exception is sonic the hedgehog Then im monitoring you extremely closely and any mistake can mean instant block. IT GETS SERIOUS
#anyway i just blocked a mutual of like a year on twt bc they got into sonic from sonic 3 and then immediately started shipping son/adow#and Okay. IS IT PETTY TO BLOCK SOMEONE OVER A SHIP. yeah probably.#but time and time again ive seen new sonic fans that always like son/adow#always say the most fucking egregious shit about the series bc they dont know SHIT from FUCK about the games#also son/adow fans are the number one offenders of mischaracterizing the characters and no thats not hyperbole. its actually unbelievable#listen i can be friends with someone who likes son/adow. Sometimes. if theyre chill.#but as a Seasoned Sonic Veteran (has been playing the games since i could pick up a controller)#i need to spare myself the grief of seeing bad sonic takes on my timeline#i can handle people liking things i dont like but im so cagey about sonic i get genuinely heated about bad takes#from people who are just ignorant and dont play any of the games and just read idw and watch the movies#like holy shit pick up a controller or watch a playthrough what is wrong with you#literally when sonic 2 came out i became mutuals with this person#and they did a “hottest sonic character” poll AND TAILS WAS ONE OF THE OPTIONS#and when they were getting dogged on they said “oh i just watched the movies i didnt know he was eight” BROTHER.#i cant trust new sonic fans bro. ESPECIALLY NOT ONES WHO CAME FROM THE MOVIES seriously im watching yall.#anyway if youre wondering what any of that has to do with the ship thinking sonic and shadow would be in a relationship is inherently wrong#sorry.#does this sound elitist idk maybe but idc im just sick of these ppl#ok heated rant over#txt
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Ughgghhhhhhhhhh
#talking about jeongin 'working hard to tone his body' as if he wasnt always fuckin skinny and fit to begin with lol Im so over itttttt#this is the issue- i love stomach and i love these dudes in crop tops but inevitably it always just ends up with dieting talk and#omg wow he totally eats nothing but chicken breast and starves himself isnt that SO cool#and im like no not really :)#and this is why i wont be talking about how prominent his cheek bones are lately either bc i still remember his italy vlog#where he got off the long flight and went to the gym and then said he felt like he was gonna faint#like sorry not gonna promote or support that in him or felix or lee know#or chan or any of them call me an easily offended little shrew all you like i hate this shit#like as if jeongin wasnt always handsome? as if he needs to be doing any of that lol#but then again he gained muscle and ppl are talking about him more so. why would any of them not do this#when the industry itself promotes it and then the fans pay it off in the end lol
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im into shibari and ropeplay because i wasn’t swaddled enough as a baby
#actually i don’t think i was swaddled at all#posts that i drop on my blog at 5:40 am like a bomb 💣#but you know what who cares#if you’re offended by the fact that i think about adult stuff from time to time im very sorry to tell you that i am pretty much an adult#and that you’re not following a child#(now let’s see the follower count drop see if i care)#and honestly i am well aware that this site is not for popularity#if you’re here for that please move to ig or tiktwat#thank you!!!#🤗#ropeplay#shibari
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why do so many sam fans seem to think that everyone else is under some kind of obligation to make sure they're interpreting the show the exact same way so as not to upset their delicate sensibilities........... as opposed to it being their own responsibility to not seek out content that will upset them???
#like im sorry but it's just not other people's responsibility to find out how you interpret something#just so they can make sure they don't offend you on their own blog#please grow up#wank for ts#mp
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ughghg hi i hate to be serious or be such a downer but i really need to put this out there because some people are getting too comfortable.
but then again it's partially my fault because i let it happen --
this is more pointed towards strangers, so if you know we're friends/mutuals you're cool 🫶
anyways just want to point out that if we're not close especially, it doesn't give you an excuse to treat me like i'll be fine with everything that you'll say.
i can handle jokes, i love joking unseriously with anyone, and i just love talking with people in general and usually the interactions aren't that deep.
but there's a line between genuine playfulness and thinly-veiled insults/mockery. saying "sorry" or anything like "/j" doesnt change that.
and yeah i'm aware this is especially hard to discern because people's actual tone over the internet can be perceived differently. and sometimes people aren't aware that they're being rude. so that's why i usually give people another chance.
it's just to the point that when it happens over and over again where it stops being coincidental. plus i usually just try to trust my gut whenever i feel uncomfortable with people from the get-go.
idk what else to say but please remember i'm also just another person. and that applies to everyone else here. you're free to say whatever you want but that doesn't mean you're free from any pushback.
#[—✦ rambling#anyways sorry for this rant omg 🧍#i've been debating on whether or not i wanted to post this#but idk it feels important to put out there#also also idk if this would even do anything bc people will just say whatever they want anyway#and i cant really avoid that 😭#im also afraid if i worded things wrong but LMAo i'll deal with the consequences later too if so#again if you're worried that it's about you IT'S NOT- this has been going on for a while#and i've already blocked the offending parties so if you're seeing this post you're good!! 👍#+ if i consider you a friend and if anything happens i'll bring it up with you instead anyway 😭#and if you've recently sent me anything i'll get to yall like i normally would later after i destress gjsdlkfsd#some people are just really ;;; persistent on forcing you to be friends with them instead of it being natural#sometimes i just click with people immediately and sometimes it takes time but that doesnt mean i dont value one over the other more#agh i really hope i dont have to post anything like this again#i really want this blog to be a safe space#but this is more for my personal comfort as well 😭<3
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Hey Jashers! So. I’ve recently seen a lot of people expressing how they feel the CJ community has been getting kinda toxic lately. It’s honestly really disheartening to see this happening, especially as this community and Chonny’s music/characters mean a lot to me. I guess this is all to say: if you feel the CJ community is getting toxic, let’s try to actually fix it. And no this doesn’t mean “make 10000 callout posts”. The Jash himself said both on Twitter/X and on the CJFS he’d rather all this (recent incident[s?]) be essentially acknowledged and dropped. If you want to keep this fandom alive and healthy (which I feel for the most part it already is! CJ is active in the discord server and is comfortable engaging with his fans and I think that alone is a really positive sign. Plus we have some incredible creativity and support !) do your best to contribute to the positivity and respectful, good content that we DO for the most part produce. You can make it clear that creeps, those looking to disrespect boundaries/privacy, etc. aren’t welcome here, but please try to do so effectively and only as needed. I know it’s kinda trite, but these people feed off attention and giving them more of it (regardless of whether it’s positive or negative) is only going to worsen the situation. In addition, if you can, please try to adopt the mindset that while flawed, this is an ultimately pretty good and respectful community. The more you express that it’s toxic and disgusting, the more it’s gonna live up to that.
[If you feel the need to distance yourself that’s totally fine and understandable too, just please do it for yourself and not as like. a statement I guess?? Idk I honestly haven’t seen anyone doing this I just thought it could be good to address]
TLDR: This community means a lot to me and I really desperately don’t want to watch it go to shit. Please for the love of whatever, let the toxicity die attention-less in the shade and just . be respectful. foster the actually positive parts of this fandom so they can prosper.
[PS: genuinely none of this is actually directed at anyone!! More just addressing a recent trend I’ve seen I guess??? Anyways uh yeah. Stay cool and stay hyped for chaos week I suppose :]]
#agh I’m not used to making serious posts or statements but I really really wanted to get this out there#I really hope this makes sense I’m so sorry for the massive text block-#uhhhh#shit dins#I guess#chonny jash#cj community#I’m honestly real scared to post this and idk if anyone will see but uhhh here it is ig#sorry for all the uuhs and I guess’s. I don’t have a good reason aside from nerves lol#Ik it’s kinda hypocritical to make a massive post about how we should stop massively posting about this#but this is super important to me and also probably the only serious thing I’ll ever do here#and we’re going back to almost exclusively art and shitposting in the morning sooo uh yeah#please don’t send me to the pits for this- if you take issue with this post legitimately feel free to dm or smth!! im just some guy and#I wanna be able to communicate and understand people’s perspectives n stuff#or send asks if you’d prefer. either way just like. communcate!! I won’t get offended and I promise I don’t bite :]
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Now seems as good a time as any to reveal I've been a VIP since 2011
#big bang#gdragon#t.o.p.#daesung#taeyang#i do want to say that what ever TOP wants to do going forwards is his business and in no way do i want him back in big bang if he doesn't#feel comfortable being there#BUT if its just like guilt? over smoking weed? BRO you are NOT THE SEX OFFENDER get BACK IN THAT BAND#Daesung ran a man over with his car girl#please rejoin if you want to do so#please please please please please#i admit a portion of this is very selfish#i very much want to see BIG BANG live in my lifetime but not at the expense of TOP's comfort#you do what you need to king#it just kills me that you're holding all this guilt when you really arent the one who gave the band a bad name#but also idk these people so all i wish is that they live how they want to live going forwards and find a way to live with no regrets#i just really miss big bang#also daesungs my favorite sorry for writing like a deep dive into my feelings on top when hes not my number one(hes like tied at number two#also tonight(JPN ver.) is one of their top songs sorry i dont make the rules#stupid liar is my fav tho#also power by gd is ass im sorry i wanted to like it but its ass#visuals are great but bro its so ass
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at the risk of sounding like a Very Hurt Person ill be frank. Seto Kaiba being set up as a traumatized, mentally ill kid with PTSD, who had to cope alone and heal alone and bury his past and reinvent himself, proving to and deeply convincing himself that he can do anything in the process, resulting in this narcissistic double ended blade persona, which, narratively speaking, only gets stomped on, by the good guys, antagonized, by the good guys, and as the Merciful course of action the good guys: Force Him Back Into Accepting And Becoming His Past Self (literally cant imagine a worse fate for anyone who had to erase their past and remake themselves tbh) With Its Past Loves And Past Hurts:
this shit suck lol
#not art#seto kaiba#yugioh#ygo#i might hiss like a wounded animal when Atem is near Kaiba. but worry not. its only because im personally offended when he speaks to seto#i AM projecting before anyone accuses me of it. but the interpretation is solid sadly. this post is canon compliant!#do with that what you will#would literally rather die than to have a a gang of friends following me and forcing me to accept FURTHER BACK the past i escaped like#wdym??? ill kms?????? right now??#and the secret past is one where he was your SERVANT???? this man with THIS ego???????YOUR LOYAL SERVANT?#AND HE LOST THE LOVE OF HIS LIFE THERE????? and he spent the rest of his life MOURNING after both yall???????#no id rather kms than acknowledge im sorry#i get him#this is why im a kaiba kinnie and youre a kaiba shipper with atem or yugi or joey#LMAO came out swinging at the last sentence im unwell rn
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Me, a known Deadpool fan: god I hope nobody thinks I'm a Deadpool fan
#hes one of the guys of all time (positive)#unfortunately a lot of people who like deadpool are the guys of all time (extremely derogatory)#the amount of times i see my special guy in like anti sjw memes im like what the fuck. he would NOT fucking say that#deadpool is like top five characters that are sooo fucking good but unfortunately have been coopted by the worst people you know#me at dudes that wear deadpool shirts that say shit like 'um NOT sorry for offending you':#YOURE NOT AFFLIATED WITH ME
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My entire life, I've yearned for the kind of community the Jewish community and Judaism have provided me. I found out I had Jewish ancestry when I was a kid, I looked into it more later and realized my most recent Jewish ancestor (like three-ish generations back) was almost certainly forcibly converted out, and decided to convert to like. Make amends for that I guess and also because I really vibed with the holidays and how we turn up everywhere in history bc we keep doing cool stuff despite consistently shitty circumstances.
But I digress.
I have waited my WHOLE LIFE trying to experience the joy becoming Jewish has shown me, and that gets shit on constantly.
My sister has started making a truly obscene number of Jew jokes. My mom scoffs at all the 'nonsense rules' and has said repeatedly that she thinks choosing a 'restrictive' religion is dumb and I've made a mistake. She even said it's an insult to HER parenting skills that I would seek out religion after she tried to teach me to know better.
My dad is dead but I never ever in a million years would have told him even if he were alive, and my sister thinks it's funny to threaten to 'out' me as Jewish to his relatives even though they're basically KKK-adjacent so she actually enjoys threatening mg safety at this point. (Yay family right?)
My friends have turned everything into an Israel/Palestine discussion lately and I know damn well what they're doing when they start saying truly horrible shit about Israelis and looking at me. They get mad if I try to temper their extremism so I've given up. I barely talk to them anymore and I spend more and more time with other Jews from temple and I don't want to like. Isolate myself from all non-Jews I guess bc I've always felt like that leads to weirdness and perpetuates shit about Jews being unfriendly I guess idk?
Anyway I digress again. My point is I'm really sick of constantly being expected to tolerate it when people think I shouldn't be Jewish.
Other queer people think I'm somehow compromising my queer identity by being Jewish, leftists think I hunt Palestinian children for sport now apparently, right-wingers think I traffic good Christian babies for organ harvesting or some shit idfk, my friends think that if I'm not being more vitriolic in my hatred of Israel than they already are I'm some kind of secret rabid Netanyahu fan, my family think I've been recruited into a cult apparently and the only other people who show me even an ounce of compassion or regard are other Jews and Gd knows there's like ten of us and that number is unlikely to increase.
Just. Fuck. I've put blood, sweat, tears and money into this, I invested more time and emotional commitment into this than I have into going to college or choosing a career, I love it more than anything and have only loved it more the more I learned about it, and all I get when I express this or even just let slip that I am Jewish and chose to be, I get nothing but hatred. I will never understand how a religion that has spent all 5000 years of our existence minding our business and arguing about the same book over and over can possibly have offended this many people with our existence.
Dmn anon, that is a lot you're dealing with right now. I'm so sorry you're surrounded by people who clearly don't respect you. Because yes this is a lack of basic respect, and it is antisemitic. Now I don't know how old you are and how safe you are, but if you can safely do so, set very hard boundaries. Do not tolerate this amount of disrespect towards who you are. It is hard, and many of us have had to go through similar situations, as you can read all over this blog. But I think having to spend your life surrounded by people who make you feel unsafe and disrespected is worse. I know sometimes there are situations in which people cannot safely set these boundaries, I hope it's not your case, but if it is feel free to come here to vent again.
I know you don't want to isolate yourself from goyim. Many Jewish people don't want to. Sadly, when people disrespect us like this, they're the ones isolating us. It's not your fault. Seek people who love and accept you. Sadly, a good chunk of goyim won't - I'm not saying everyone, obviously, but a portion. Having a good Jewish support network seems to be more and more important, whether it's irl or online.
I hope you can soon be in an environment that's safer and more accepting
- 🐺
#jewish vents#antisemitism#leftist antisemitism#jewish convert#i feel like i need to clarify#while i said that a good portion of goyim are disrespectful and antisemitic#i dont mean every goy is#so if someone is coming in the comments to call me goy-phobic i assure you i do not have the patience to deal with that#i mean what i said#thats not an attack on goyim#its just an observable truth stated by literally every jewish person I've ever spoken to#if you feel offended at being called antisemitic try not to be antisemitic#like im sorry i sound so mad but i am just very tired of seeing my community suffer while everyone else just looks the other way
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"i'm sorry i committed the crime of being born this way," says michael, fourteen year old cisgender heterosexual male after a teenage girl says she'd pick the bear
#the victim complex among teenage boys on social media is insane#dont get me wrong#men have been unnecessarily antagonized lately#HOWEVER.#they always pull up with this shitty excuse whenever there's man or bear discourse#“im sorry that i committed the crime of being born a man”#FIRST OF ALL.#youre no man. youre a child. youre a boy.#SECOND OF ALL.#how fucking dare you#say something like that when WOMEN have been FUCKING ATTACKED THROUGHOUT HISTORY JUST FOR BEING WOMEN?!#it's actually so stupid that i needed to comment about it#ALSO.#if you feel personally attacked when someone says “men are violent”#that is on you.#so many of the same men say “women always lie” “women always cheat”#do i feel offended? no. wanna know why? im not a liar or a cheater. also#all genders lie and cheat!#but violence is SIGNIFICANTLY MORE MEN than it is WOMEN!#if you feel personally attacked that a teenage girl says she doesnt feel safe around men#maybe youre the problem.#you should feel outraged#but not because your identity is being attacked#you should feel outraged because there are so many women who dont feel safe around your gender!#and then you should try and inspire a change! at least try!#you dont need to “prove yourself” you dont need to whinge and complain that being born male is a crime (because it isnt.)#(if anything being born female is a crime#but thats another story)#you just need to go outside. talk to people. talk to real women. be kind. treat women with respect. it's not hard. you are not a crime.#man vs bear
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what 93 clip are we talking abt..
Its that scene from the last episode of 92 where jeans all How Much Do You Love Charles Xavier and eriks blows up all How Dare You Ask Such A Question I Owe That Man My LIFE or w/e
#snap chats#that was the one that hooked me like chat they said the L word#ik its not meant to be romantic but still …………….. woah …….#erik funny as hell in that shit he really got so offended 😭😭😭#it wouldve been kinder to shoot him like How Dare You Question His Love For Charles Xavier#really blew up on her like bro ok we get it you love him😭😭😭😭#sorry for asking now can you help save his life ……..#anyway everyone be nice to me today today keeps getting worse#i accidentally left my computer charger at my moms and its a four hour drive to and fro 🕴#and i have an advisor meeting in like two hours 🕴#i mean my computers at full battery so i can attend BUT STILL IM SO PISSED#i can do my comm work cause Thank The Lord of my tablet but still#im mad ……. im gonna lay in bed and daydream of old man yaoi to cope before working#ILL BE FINE. once the meetings done i just go back and get my charger#say hi to my dog and cat while im there ok Might As Well#and then come back and then it’ll all be ok#im just annoyed because my break’s literally after classes tomorrow fuckin driving around so much FOR WHAT 😭😭😭😭#driving i hate you i loathe you with every fiber of my being. moving on now ….
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hiii i was wondering if i could request without a prompt from the prompt list? if so, can i request eren with an s/o where s/o and eren have just recently married and adopted a kitten, then one day said kitten keeps getting clingy with y/n just to find the reason why is bcs there's a little bun in the oven surprise and then y/n surprises eren with a testpack (and the kitten gets involved with the surprise somehow). really sorryyy if this was weird but I rarely see dad eren stories nowadays LMAO
Tysm for requesting!! Ofc u can put anything even just thoughts in my submissions, the prompt lists are just there if u need help thinking!
More oneshots/masterlist
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People always tend to say that marriage was a big step, a big change. So you don’t know if its just because Eren’s Eren, but nothing really seemed to change with you and him after getting married.
You’d both already settled into your home and wrestled over which room decor you liked more and so things were nice, nice enough that you both decided you wanted to get a cat. It gave you the opportunity to see how far erens responsibility could stretch (which wasn’t too far from what you’ve seen😭) but anyways you guys had your kitten.
It always gravitated towards you, unfortunate for eren who refused to admit how much he truly liked the kitten. You would constantly catch him playing with the kitten way too rough for its size and you’d scold eren for not taking care of it properly etc how hes ‘a terrible father’ to the kitten 😭
Eren whistled rhythmically in a failing attempt to steal the kittens attention as it was once again, all over you. Disturbing whatever you were up to while eren tried to pick it up and place it nearer to him.. only for it to go crawling back to. He frowned like a pissed little kid and was about to verbalise his complaints until he got interrupted by you’re own complaints. Not about the kitten though.
“My head hurts so bad” you groan, hands flying to your temples, “do you feel sick?” eren replies, attention slowly leaving the kitten nestling in your lap.
“Yeah kind of, I think the breakfast you made me was that bad I’m gonna throw it up”
“Fuck you” Eren says, annoyed that he was ever concerned about your wellbeing (hes just kidding guys hes a silly billy this is a hee hee ha ha funny happy family i swear)
You snicker at Erens eye roll, “But really though I don’t know why I feel so nauseous”,
“Well maybe your allergic to the kitten?” Eren suggests in such a genuine tone that it was humorous.
“Eren,” you sigh, “you make it so hard not to bully you, you cant get mad at me” you’re disappointing sigh turns into another playful giggle as Eren starts frowning while you explain to him how cat allergies are more sneezing rather than nausea, and how you’ve had the kitten for long enough that you would most definitely not be allergic😭
“Yeah yeah fuck off the kitten doesn’t even like you” he says deflecting how he was wrong as it continues to roll around on your lap. “Take some medicine or whatever”, as always he still cares.
You open your cabinet in the toilet reaching for the painkillers, your hand stops as you notice the purple box next to it. You only had it really ‘just in case’ but in all fairness.. you were late. Your brain forced your hand to take the pregnancy test box because it would be harmless and would ease your worry and speculations.
Eren wasn’t home right now so it was safe enough for you to anxiously wait on your bed, staring at the test in the packet. Your glare getting interrupted as your alarm goes off alerting you that you can now check. It was positive, your second test was aswell, then the third one you rushed to buy at the store was also positive😭
This wasn't bad news at all, simply new.
You'd constantly joke about erens immaturity and lack of responsibility although you'd known him well enough to see that in the right moments, he truly is a highly capable man who would do great as a father, it grew on you as the minutes passed, the thought of starting a family with him didn't seem so bad even though you and eren weren't exactly aiming to get pregnant in the moment you did😭
You searched in your head for a way to break the news to him and you figured it would be fun to include the other member of the family, your kitten🤷♀️
"Im home" you hear ur husband shout as the front door shuts. "Hi Eren!!" you shout back, purposely in another room,
"can u feed the kitten really quick? I forgot to a while ago its probably hungry by now!"
"Wow and you call me a bad father" eren mutters, "I heard you." You reply blankly as he grins amused.
The kitten walks eagerly overtaking eren walking towards its little food station set aside by the kitchen counter. He notices one of the has evidently less full than the others so he decides to take that one to finish up in the kittens bowl.
You watch behind him eagerly but quietly lingering sheepishly around the counter, he tips the bag upside down as only a plain box falls out of it. "..what" he mumbles in confusion, he opens it to see the test inside but doesn't immediately react, nor move.
"Are you pregnant?!" he exclaims..
Facing the kitten and still not looking back to you, "Fuck off eren" you say smiling, yeah he heard you behind him.
He finally turns to you as you walk towards him, he has a fat grin on his face as he opens his arms rushing toward you before you can and hugs you so tight your feet lift off the floor and you feel like you're suffocating, you'll let it slide this time.
He finally settles you down in front of the counter, loosening his grip as he moves his hands to cradle your head, frantically planting kisses on your forehead to your cheeks to you nose to your lips. He can't contain his dashing grin and neither can you
"Can I name it?" Eren says with a boyish grin you know you cant trust,
"absolutely not" you say monotonously.
He frowns again, still tangling you in his arms against the counter as he runs one of his thumbs across your cheek, the other cradling your lower back keeping you close to him. "Why not?”
“Why not??? Because you tried to name our kitten Eren junior!"
"Eren juniors a great name, idk what you have against it!!"
"I hate you."
"Yeah yeah you love me, and i'll love our kid too."
"Yeah?" you say quietly, brushing a strand of loose hair behind his ear. Your hand glides downwards his shoulder as you simply admire your husband, your husband.
He stares into you deeply, slowly leaning in once again to kiss you. His hand moves from your face to the back of your head, encouraging you closer, deepening the kiss. Meanwhile your hands run through his hair. He gently pushes you forward into the counter as you both melt against each other, savouring the sensation of tooth-rotting love and adoration buzzing at your fingertips.
My requests r open for anything u can ask me any specific oneshots for eren or any character aswell!! Tysm for reading 🫶🫶
#attack on titan#eren jaeger#eren aot#eren x reader#headcanons#eren headcanons#eren x you#bf!eren#boyfriend!eren#eren x y/n#husband!eren#dad!eren#this is actually my first proper oneshot im terrified#i actually hate this please love me still#constructive criticism is encouraged#send help i cant do this#im really sorry anon i actually dont like pregnant!reader or dad!eren but I SWEAR i fr tried to pull through for you i still love you more#-more than anyone for requesting tumblr cut me off on that im offended
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