#im so. aaugh
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cries and cries and cries over shard the metal sonic
#i just learned about him like two weeks ago and i love him so much :(#i need to find a list of his specific issues so i can read them myself#ive been reading arcs here and there of archie (like werehog!!!! beloved) so i definitely want to find shards issues#im so. ough#he never got to tell nicole. he said he was having trouble connecting with people and then died. he didnt get to try again#wails!!!! why :(#talks#sonic#theres more to life... he tries to break metal out too until the soft reboot pops up#im so. aaugh#<- guy who is never over satbk so this is very typical#live life!!!!!#shard the metal sonic
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my shop is reopening TOMORROW SEPTEMBER 15th @1:00pm EST for another lightning round! i got a bunch of new stuff up for pre-order as well as some old favorites :]
💥IMPORTANT💥- pre-order items are gonna have LIMITED STOCK this time, so there is a chance my new stuff will sell out!
snailzshop.bigcartel.com
#TOMORROW!!!!! AAUGH!!#snailz shop#my fav item from this round is probably the team chaotix car. i love gimmicky keychains#though im also very excited to get the sonic cd cd keychains... metal my beloved..#also this is probably the last time im doing a huge drop of sonic merch#most of these things i made because sonic expo is coming up in november! so ill have these guys there too
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This has probably already been asked, but you said that W1 goes through the events of the game in V1s place. So what happens when it meets Gabriel? Would it avoid him, attack the same as in game, or do something different? Love the AU; some of the best quality work in here!
A gentle reminder.
I think W1 is capable of more spite than V1 alone!
#ultrakill#gabriel ultrakill#v1 ultrakill#v2 ultrakill#w1 ultrakill#w1#v1#v2#gabriel#ultrakill comic#ultrakill fanart#my art#digital art#THANK YOU ANOOONNN THANK YOU SO MUCHH#this was SOO FUN TO MAKE IM AAUGH#w1 would not fear him actually the fucking audacity to call it a mistake#i think itd attack him the same however its rivalry would be a little different than v1's!#because it can talk and its personality is a bit different#cw blood#cw brutality#i suppose since his hand is being fucked up!
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transfem miles giggling at people calling her spider-woman on accident even though she hasn’t confirmed or denied anything yet but hasn’t been trying to hide her transition either, emt patching her arm up as she tries to convince them to “stop wasting resources” on her, and the emt is like “excuse me young lady,” or some shit and starts arguing back. like immediately makes her so giddy she stops arguing. maybe rio is like talking about spider-man with her coworkers and she’s so used to saying spider-woman at home and thinking it that she says it out loud. oh right sorry you can go now (removes the reverse beartrap)
#transfem miles#miles morales#spiderman#spider man#if transfem miles has 0 fans im dead and i will be back.#young transfem joy is like. AAUGH. IT REALLY MAKES ME SO GIDDY. LIKE I FEEL LIKE IM FEELING IT PERSONALLY WHEN I TYPE SHIT LIKE THIS OUT#both the amazing stuff and the angst i write for tfem miles feels like it’s coming directly from and right back into my soul fr fr#she’s so me#m&m posts
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rambling about Haruka
As an ND person I just hate how Haruka's character is either completely infantilized or reduced to a selfish, evil murderer, when, to me, he is so much more than that.
Especially the latter; I hate when any MILGRAM character is called evil because what's the point of MILGRAM, then? They're all morally grey! That's how they test us. But Haruka in particular because I feel like it comes from a place of ableism, intentional or not.
I'm not sure if I should put TWs, but well I talk about ableism, murder (obviously lol), childhood trauma and well... it's Haruka
Haruka's outburst in the VD and his implication of killing animals (I know it's basically canon but erm... i can explain why I think it's an implication later) (i just finished writing the post and actually i explained why at the bottom of the post but its not a full explanation so lol) are the reasons I see people calling him either evil or childlike, and while I do think that Haruka is stuck in a childlike state in some aspects, this is emotional dysregulation of an ND and/or traumatized person, to me.
The uglier sides of being ND/traumatized, the ones that get heavily stigmatized and seen as intentional or evil; I think this was a display of one of them. And I really wish to see more people focusing on Haruka's disability in the ways it can affect his communication and day-to-day life skills more than "oh, poor baby, he has a disability that makes him feel unwanted" without actually understanding the details of the disability and, well, the reason why it is a disability.
Like, the emotional dysregulation that comes with being autistic, which is my headcanon for him. The hyperempathy and literal thinking that might make him harder to communicate with, and get people frustrated with him more often.
That and being severely neglected; I think neglect is one of the lesser discussed forms of childhood trauma and the fact that Haruka was shown to be neglected as well as abuse really means a lot to me, because I think some people don't quite understand just how much neglect and isolation fucks you up.
All those factors combined are a recipe for an unstable, impulsive, clingy shell of a human, and him getting called evil for that really saddens me. It's important to remember that these MVs are extracted from the prisoners' own memories and thoughts. It comes from their perception of their surroundings, their murders, and their own selves. The manic look that Haruka has on his face for a lot of AKAA, for example. The makeshift shirt he's wearing, as if he's desperately trying to sew himself together into a normal person, the exhausted, frustrated look when he picks up the necklace, it's important to remember that this is how he sees himself. A monster who has lost control of himself. The line "I'll keep killing to be your good boy" was a shock, but the way he meekly apologized to Es at the end of his VD, I really think that shows that he feels guilty, that he wants to convince himself more than anyone that he was a good person, that he was really trying to be one despite how his unlucky life frustrated him to his breaking point.
As for his infantilization, it has already been addressed by many thoughtful members of the fandom and I'm grateful to see that, but I also want to say it myself since god knows I hate being patronized.
It feels very ableist saying he's just "someone stuck in a childlike mindset/age regressor" Yes, and how does age regression as a coping mechanism develop? Usually through prior trauma that makes you "stuck" at said age, and that can present differently. It can be longing and yearning for a simpler time, for an actual happy childhood, or having flashbacks to a traumatic event that happened at a certain age; it is not uncommon for trauma survivors to be "frozen" at the age their trauma took place.
I think both of these are the case for Haruka. Frozen at that moment, but trying to reduce himself to nothing but a little, unaware child to avoid reliving it again, relishing in the innocence and purity of his good younger times (emphasis on purity--Haruka's murder was by strangulation, yet there's a shot in AKAA where he's covered in blood. I know it's after he killed the animals, but he's in the stitched-together outfit here; I think there's more to this MV than just killing the animals. Since this outfit is... not very likely to be worn in reality, did the animal killing happen at all? Even if it did, I think this shot remains an indicator that he sees himself as impure; guilty. I have a LOT to say about the inconsistencies in Haruka's MVs, but I'll save that for later... Anyway, back on topic) It is NOT "having the mental capacity of a child, so being unable to date etc." Haruka has still lived 17 years, maybe even more, since he isn't too interested in remembering his age. How do you treat actual neurodivergent people if this is how you see him?
When I rewatch the MVs, relisten to the VDs, reread the interrogations and timelines, I see no evil, just an incredibly broken, misunderstood person.
#please excuse any inconsistencies or spelling mistakes its almost 5am ive been awake all night lmaooo#im open to discussion but pls be nice :(#im a relatively new milgram fan (got into it just when ILY MV came out—got hyperfixated oct/nov) so please inform me if I say anything wrong#i love haruka so so much aaugh#i will defend him till my last breath#milgram#sakurai haruka#milgram project#haruka sakurai#jay rambles bleh idk#should i even tag this#i feel so scared to share my thoughts on the milgram prisoners AAA i hope everything makes sense
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aventurine pl. Plea s e . PLLEEEEEEASE
#★ arin rambles#‘here we go again’ you think everytime you see my ramble tag. I dont blame you#AVENTURINE AVENTURINE PLEASE SAVE ME WHITE BOY#OH MY LORD#OH MY GOODNESS GRACIOUS OH MY GOODNESS.#MY JSOE IS RUNNING HES RUINNING MY LIFE I CANT DO THIS ANYMORE IM SO ILL PLEASE I#AVENTURINE. im so serious i can talk about this man all day. and more specifically this video#‘it was just posted 30 minutes ago arin youre scaring the kids’ SILENCE. I NEED SPACE#I NEED A. A MOMENT. EVERYBODY PLEAS GETA WAY FROM ME IM GOING TO GET SO SCARY#Please. Im so sorry. Im begging you . I love this man oh my gish please hes so cute#HES SO CUTE. HES SO CUTE IM SO SICK OF HIM WHY???????? WHY IS HE SO PRETTY HES SO PRETTY HES GOREGOUS HES SO STUNNING. HELLO. HELLO.#Im going to. Slam my head against the wall im overwhelmed with joy and happiness hes everything ive ever wanted ever#any minute not spent talking about him is a moment wasted i promise you MY PRINCESS IM COMING TO SAVE YOU#IM HIS KNIGHT IN SHINING ARMOUR EXCEPT ITS NOT SHINY#IM COVERED IN DIRT#IM STILL COMING FOR YOU AVENTURINE RUN#oh goodness me oh my#im so happy hes so prettu im so happy i cant do rhis im sweating geniumnly i feel so sick#Im cant . Do this anymore. I CANT TAKE IT. I HAVE TO… AAUGH… AAAHH… I HAVE TO…. DANCE!#guys…. he my favorriet…#my slinky….. my krimpet… my teacup i think. My doc mc stuffins doctor playset. My dishwasher. My italian coldsteel cinquedea . atp anything#hes my EVERYTHING. MY EVERYTHING…!!!!!!!! *MY TELEKENISIS THROWS EVERYTTHING ACROSS THE ROOM*#yall i dont think ive had a hyperfixation this horribly bad since. Since the. Since. MAN I DONT KNOW#IM COOKED. HE WOMT LEAVE ME ALONE. I LITERALLY DREAMT OF HIM LAST NIGHT LIKE IM SO DOOMED? ACTUALLY?#oh to be medicated and focus on . Things like cooking. Or idk. Getting a job. No i just think about some messed up blonde all day im absolut#ly DOOMED#yes im still yapping i got 30 tags u gon stick through them all. Every single one of them. Dont leave me please i want to talk about him ton#TO SOMEONE. I WANT TO TALK ABOUT HIM TO SOMEONE ALL DAY. ALL MY FRIENDS ARE TESTING. IM LEFT ALONE ALL DAY I JUST WANT TO TALK ABOUT MY WIFE#i womder how crazy i look right now#Sighs lovingly at him..
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Draw.
Your OC/sona
(Or others) /silly
SMG8 IS VERY GOOFY SILLY I love drawing my own characters so so much
#smg8#smg8 is silly guys#smg4#smg4 art#smg4 oc#my oc#oc#my original character#original character#art#drawing#doodle#goofy#yall i love my smg4 oc AAUGH#hes so goofy#im going insane#silly#my art#storms drawing requests!#storms art
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Who's ready to see the worst animation I've made yet
#Im not. I have it scheduled AAUGH#Janky tweening AND it's suggestive oc x canon shit? Kill me#Actually idk why im being so hard on myself i think at the end of the day it's funny#text#text post
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Imagining Pancake stealing Starlo's poncho and sleeping in it, like it's a big blanket or sleeping bag.
Meanwhile Starlo is wondering where in tarnation his poncho is, then finding Pancake sleeping in it. And he leaves her be.
Ed soon questions as to why Starlo is out and about without his poncho, and his response is, "Uhh. Couldn't find it. Let's go." And carries on. To Ed's bewilderment cuz Starlo doesn't go ANYWHERE w/o his poncho as North Star. So. Hmmm
#the cake doth speak#self ship stuff#🌵💫#Starcake#IM GONNA STEAL HIS PONCHO#I WANNA SLEEP IN IT#AAUGH#it looks so comfy and soft like CMON#weighted blanket-
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rewatching gravity falls and remembering how much i LOVE dipford😭 they are so cute
#dipford#proship#AAAAAA#theyre so so cute#darkshipper#omgggg#im gonna cry#i love darkships#DIPFORDD!!! AAUGH
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there was a post.., about blackout poetry but with penis and boobs randomly inserted into the text and i made this image but lost the original post i was going to attach it to and now i feel stupid but take this anyways
#I CAN'T FIND THE ORIGINAL FUCKING POST#IM SO MAD I FEEL LIKE AN IDIOT#I LOST ITT AAUGH#mcr#danger days#ddttlotfk#blackout poetry#kinda not really#stupid post i know#i should kill myself im embarrassing myself on tumblr dot com#riddler rambles
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1 of these days we're accidentally going to post something meant for our vent blog on here and you will all lose your minds <3
#amethyst.txt#im so tired im just so tired#it feels. so stupid to be upset but .............. aaugh#ok. well. its fine.#im fine. i'll be fine. its always always going to be Fine. fuck#vent#delete later
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Lmao nerd
#limbus company#project moon#my art#lcb samjo#lcb dongrang#he's just so easy to draw#will i ever draw this guy not looking at his tablet thing? no. probably not#aaugh i got. too attached to him. this will have severe consequences im sure#fanart
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✨
#aaugh putting this in tags because im shy but. little reminder that i will answer asks/questions about what the hell im on about in my#isat drawings and the rambles i leave in the tags. i am however like a vampire in that i must be invited to do so first#this ALSO counts for Nohats. Theres a bunch of nohats stuff that hasnt been posted abt bc sam and i have no idea how to execute on it but#yeah im not. used to being in active fanbases so i feel rude just yellin about AUs and headcanons!!! augh!!! but i want to make it#very clear that i very expressly make fanworks with the intent that other people can chew on them and build upon them. so. if i look like#i have more info or thoughts and youd want them. youll probably have to ask since just putting it out there feels presumptive to meee yowch#ill also just answer asks in general . the only reason i dont appear talkative is bc i dont wanna look presumptive and rude LOL#lucabytetalks
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i made it five full days without touching my piercing r u all proud of me
#text#i mean ive touched it but i mean like on purpose#and not to clean it#and my hands were clean and im done touching it now. but oughgh. Metal in. my ear#aaugh. i want to spin it so bad its unreal but i know ur not supposed to do that#the amojnt of self restraint and impulse control i al showing right now and also all the time is insane
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i need to write yuri so bad but the illness
#the illness..... aaugh.#i've been writing maybe 200 words per day?? that's all i can do. its so slow. its killing me. im dying.#help me.... aaough
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