#im so mad this pilot didn’t get picked up

[randyvouz]

Guys…something LGBT happened

[thefanbasewhore]

Silent treatment - Din Djarin & Javier Peña. || Preference #1.

Summary: Just a little preference/head cannon on a snipet with Din and Javier dealing with the silent treatment. Enjoy!

Warnings/Content: none but pettiness lol

Din Djarin

Din is more of the intervert type, he likes the quiet. The shift of light to dark, nothing is more relaxing then the stars that reflect off the 'T' of his visor in complete silence.

While you understand he likes it, you tend not to talk too much, which can be difficult but you find yourself falling into comfortable silence against the mandalorian's chest more than you like to admit.

Quietness was the normal between the clan often because of the excitement that came when they were off the ship, blasters, yelling, threatening was no existent.

The Razor Crest resembled a place of peace, a place where skins real skin can press against your own without worry, he can remove the helmet in the dark to kiss you, kiss promises against your skin, a safe haven.

It would take Din longer than he would like to admit to realize you're not speaking to him, it takes almost hours to realize something is wrong.

There were hints of it, your nose turning up when he entered the cockpit, the small huffs, you avoid his gaze a presence at all times. You would even speak the child with the sweet voice but the moment he walks into the room you're silent.

Finally he's had enough, leaning against the door frame of the cockpit, you in the co-pilot seat with the child, the child holding the ball to show you for the millionth time his favorite toy. You smile sweetly at him, fingers pressing against his ears, rubbing the petals with a coo. The other hand holds out a small chunk of fruit, "Take one bite for me."

The child declines with a whine, making you huff. "C'mon buddy, you can play with the ball later." It's useless.

He clears his throat, crossing his arms over his chest. He stands unsure, hands nervously shaking as he fears the worst. You want to leave. "Is....Is something wrong?"

There's no answer, like he hasn't even said anything just the small gaze that meets him with a grimace. Again, the child distracts you instead. His heart pounds with anticipation as his chest falters.

This makes him frown, muscles straining as he grits his teeth nervously. "Hello?"

The thick tension that fills the air makes it almost impossible to breath for the pair, both are fearful, it's a new relationship, mistakes were still to be made. It pollutes the air with a sickly feeling.

Not only was the Mandalorian surprised, he was frustrated. You can see it in the way he tenses, fingers shake but not in the way his skin turned red under all the armour, that was for him to feel the heat run up his back and blush his neck.

He clearly didn't like the way you responded, long strides until he's between your legs. He stands tall, towering over your sitting figure. Intimidating with his large shoulders, the metal points of his helmet staring down at you. His fingers find your chin, gripping to finally feel your eyes but his words are gentle, pleading. "Tell me.. what is wrong?"

When you don't speak he does, "Cyar'ika, sweet girl if something is wrong you need to tell me."

"You're an idiot." He finds humor in the words, a chuckle tightening his chest.

"Care to elaborate? You say that a lot." Gloved fingers move up your jaw, fingers press against the soft spot in the back of your ear, apply just enough pressure to make it comforting.

"It's not funny. I'm mad at you." Your face was serious, lips pursing with a slight frown. This makes Din sigh, he kneels down until he's at your height still in-between your legs.

"I'm not laughing, I'm sorry. Tell me."

Your words make his heart pound, tears starting to stings eyes, the glossing over makes him worried. "You just jumped into the Krpt Dragon without a worry. You didn't think about me or the child. You don't care if you die.. but I do."

"I do care... You and the child are the only two people I care for." He disagrees, the cool basker pressing against your collarbone, leaning against your body. "I would do anything for you two."

"I know that... But you cannot be risking your life for people like this. I know you like to help but it's too much to loose." You pause, "I can't take it, the thought of loosing you."

The words make him pause. Throughout his life Din has heard a lot of things these words were yours and yours alone. They make him nervous, his breath hitches, he doesn't know how to feel. He's never had to think about this before.. he's was like but now he has a girl, a family waiting for him.

"I-Im sorry." It's uncharacteristic, they way he lifts his helmet just enough to press a soft kiss against your shoulder, another one to your neck before pressing against your lips for one final one, he words whispered against lips. "I never thought about it like that before, forgive me.. I don't want you to worry."

"Well I can't help it." You sniff, a lazy smile at his warmth but his helmet drops back down as you catch of glimpse of blushed lips.

"I'm sorry. I'm not alone anymore, I forget." His arms wrap around your waist pulling you as close as the child on your lap will allow, the basker clad chest should be uncomfortable, cold but it's the exact opposite, warm and safe. "Forgive me Cyare."

"I can never stay mad at you." The words are breathlessly murmured against the small patch of skin on his neck, the spot where you would often pull down in the collar of his tunic to feel his skin. "I love you Bear."

"I love you sweet girl."

Javier Peña

Javier Peña's life is anything but boring, it's filled with chaos, long nights, alcohol and woman of any kind. The woman is where the problem was, no matter how much you told him it bothered you, that it should be more than just sex, he made sure it didn't.

It was pure raging hot jealousy that seared inside your veins, it crept warmth up the nape of your neck, fist ball under the table of the bar. Murphy must have noticed how violently you are chewing on your bottom lip, eyeing the pair across the bar. "You alright?"

"Fine." You snap rather quickly, eyes growing wide in realization. "Sorry Murph, I'm fine."

His eyes show it all, head tilting with an unamused look. "You don't have to lie to me."

"I'm not I'm just tired." And jealous, so, so jealous that Javier's lips press against the brunettes collar bones, flash of pink as his tongue rolls against her neck, pressing his weight against her.

You knew it was just sex, Javi made sure to let you know despite working together nothing would change, it was just sex , a stress reliever with someone who understood the faults of working for the DEA, the struggles that went with it. Except now it was more, it was those nights with next to each other naked in bed, the kisses, hugs, cute nicknames and the long talks of promises, potential future but now it seems you were never part of it.

He acted as if he were your boyfriend, he often made dinner for you, picking up a coffee before heading into the office for you every morning, he gave you gifts, his main reasoning being "It reminds me of you."

Javier was confusing, late at night after a long day he would confess his affection for you, even let it slip a few times that he loves you, swears you are his other half, his soulmate. Of course it's when he's drunk but you hold onto it being the truth he's afraid to admit.

Javier doesn't notice you leaving that night, he doesn't notice Murphy offering to walk you home, assure you get their safely despite it being right next to his own.

The next morning you decide to go into work a little earlier, hoping your sleepless night filled with tears would be worth it. At least it took your mind off it.

It was like clock work, Javier placing the large coffee cup in front of you on your desk, this time some kind of pastry is next to it, tucked in a wax bag and a kiss presses against your cheek. "Good morning Hermosa."

The silence is uncharacteristic, very seeing he literally has to beg you to shutup sometimes. His face twist into confusion as you pull away from his lips, but the mark still burns against your cheek. The same lips that you know for a fact were all over another woman's body last night.

"What's wrong?" He notices as Murphy shakes his head with a huff, clearly annoyed with his friends ignorance. Javi's eyes drift from his with shrugging shoulders to yours with a look of surprise. "What?"

"I'm going to bring these down to Lopez, meet you in a half an hour downstairs Murph." Your words make Javier's brows flur, why?

The coffee is left, along with the muffin. He sits down at his own desk, leaning over to grab it, he starts to pull it apart, pick at it with ever intent to eat it but suddenly doesn't feel hungry.

"What's her problem?"

"Really Javi? What's her problem?" The words make Javi's jaw clench, he doesn't much care for his friends tone as he speaks. "You're an idiot, you hurt her feelings."

"I didn't do anything! I even got her a muffin today, it's blueberry her favorite!" Javi feels nervous, in all the time he's known you this had never happened; intentionally ignoring him.

"you didn't do anything?" Murphy stands, Javier guesses it's to meet you. "You invited her out last night and then ignored her to fuck a girl in front of her."

"I didn't fuck her, all we did was kiss." Javi hisses back, rubbing over his face with a growl. "Besides we agreed it was just hooking up.'

"Well it doesn't seem to be for her anymore, you need to apologise. She was crying to whole way I walked her home."

"She.. She walked home?" The words sit deep in his gut, squeezing his chest with a soft sigh. No matter how much he tried to help it, all the alochol and woman could distract him from how he feels for you, even when he tries to hide it. His words faulter, "Why didn't you just tell me? I would have walked her home, when I came back you both were gone."

"She didn't want to speak with you, I made sure she got home safe. If it was any of your concern."

The words were sour, a dig that made Javier growl. Of course it was his concern, even thought he promised to never admit it, he cared for you in a way he never has for another person.

Sure he almost got married, had plenty of girlfriends but it wasn't like this. Nothing compared to the feeling of having you close at night, waking up next to you. Javier's fingers shakily reach for a cigarette, watching Murphy slip out of the main office with a huff.

As time went on, Javier couldn't get out of his own head, while they agreed that it was strictly just a way to relieve stress it was also a habit by now.

The nights spent back and forth at each other's houses, the particularly rough days were together, holding each other close.

When he found himself down you were always there, comforting him, making sure he eats telling him that alochol and cigarettes are not a meal, even going as far as making meals for him. Call him selfish, but he didn't want it to end.

The moment he heard that the next group was heading out over the intercom he was up, he knew Murphy and you were going to it, he be dammed if he would ever let you go anywhere near action without him.

You would be fine.. eventually. You give a small smile of reinsurance to Murphy as he slides into the car next to you, but both of your faces drop the moment Javi opens the door, clearing his throat with a nod of acknowledgment.

"Javi.. I thought you weren't on this one?" Murphy questions, rubbing over his face as your eyes narrow at Javier's which are already on you.

"Change of plans." It's gruff, sharp as his narrow back. "Want to tell me what's wrong sweetheart?"

He's only met with more silence, your arms wrapping across your chest as you lean into the seat, eyes roaming over the different shades of green head resting across the glass. It was going to be a long ride.

"Why are you acting like a brat?" It's a dig, he's trying to break this silence, the only way he can think of is to piss you off. "You're acting like a baby."

You bite the inside of your cheek, fighting the words turning your head to look at him, then to Steve who looks the other way, deciding now was the perfect time to mind his own business.

Javier obviously doesn't get what the silent treatment is, he shifts, leaning against the seat, spreading his legs to give you the perfect view of his legs, his thighs. There's a small smirk, cocky as his hands run across his inner thigh. "Come talk to me."

It's an invitation one that makes your blood boil, you can't help the words that fall past your lips. "Go ask that girl from the bar, you pig."

"Mmhmm." He mumbles, eyes flickering with that stupid knowing smirk. "You're mad about that mija? I thought we agreed it was no commitments besides I didn't fuck her."

The car comes to a holt, quick you and Steve tumbling towards the seats across where Javier sits, Murphy catches himself hand extending to the seat belt while you find yourself heading toward the window but fingertips softly grapsing your hips stop you, pulling you into a familiar chest.

Steve mumbles something about 'getting to work' and you two being 'ridiculous already' before opening the car door and shutting it.

You're about to follow him by pushing against Javier's chest but his grip never falters. "Relax." He mewls, lips pressing against your neck. "You know you're my girl, my Hermosa."

"I bet you said the same thing to her before you fucked her."

It's a sigh, breathlessly and exaggerated. "I told you I didn't fuck her. We only kissed."

"You could have kissed me." There was no use in struggling, but you managed to keep distance. Cold eyes on his own.

His hand presses against your chin, thumb on the sharpest angle trying to bring his lips to your own, his apology but you move your head to the side.

"I don't think we should do this anymore.." you eyes don't meet his, adverting as all cost. His jaw drops, resembling a fish out of water as it closes, opens to say something but closes against deep in thought as he hears his heart beat in his ears.

His heart stuttering at the words, chest heavy, crushing as he held in a breath. "N-No, I mean it. You're my girl, I'm sorry. You know how I feel about you."

The words sit on the tip of his tongue, his eyes shoot over to Murphy with a group of other officers talking tactics but suddenly he doesn't care about that anymore only the fact his own heart was breaking inside his chest.

"I can share you anymore. I can't do this to myself."

"I'm yours, I-I won't -." He can't seem to say the words, they choke up in his throat, eyes show his internal panic his heart against his mind, Javi didn't commit, this life style didn't allow it.

But when your fingers find the handle, trying to leave the close proximity of the car he knew he'd loose your forever. "I'll stop sleeping around, I'll stop all of it. Only me and you."

Eyes test him, even like this, large bags, no make up you looked beautiful. You're unsure letting out a deep breath, it wasn't looking good. "Please, I need you. You can't just go.."

"You get one chance Javi, one slip up and I'm not putting myself through this." He lets out a sigh of relief heart claiming down for the anticipation but before he could manage another word you open the door, stepping outside. "You coming Agent Peña? I believe you have a dinner to take me to later, since you're officially making me your girlfriend and all. I rather get this over with." Javi smiles, shaking his head as he rolls his eyes at your playfulness.

[samsflannel]

survey results are in!

sorry, this is gonna be a long post. yesterday i posted a survey with a list of polls regarding Supernatural, and it was SO much fun. I got over 300 responses, which was A LOT to sort through for the short responses, but I’ve gathered all the “data” and here it is! My responses to each poll will be under the screenshots (they are in groups of 2). I’m going to include the short answer responses in another post. ENJOY!

1. Starting off strong.

2. Pleased with this one as well.

3. Yep, I expected this response from most of us.

4. Sami, I made the wincest and destiel response just for you. YW.

5. CMON YOU GUYS......live a little!!! samjack sexy

6. I’m not really surprised that Playthings got the bulk of votes here, but I think my vote would have been 8x23.

7.  :)

8. i’m disappointed that more people didn’t choose the yellow one tbh

9. it is sexy. it is. wake up.

10. i love Dean, but he’s definitely an asshole. and that’s what makes him a great character!

11. hehe.....i understand why not a lot of people picked noncon bait....u r valid its ok im gross.

12. WHO THE FUCK PICKED NO......have you ever consumed media

13. WBK.

14. damn, Dean kinda got the short end here! a lot of samgirls took this survey

15. i get why you wouldn’t like Bugs bc it does have harmful stereotypes about native ppl but the rest of it is peak season 1 wdymmm

16. almost 50/50 here! old vs new fans we love to see it. I am definitely wincest old guard.

17. YEP. Eric Kripke needs shock therapy for that one

18. The fact that some people admitted to being dry.....tragic. I think Eileen is a great character but they are NOT endgame.

19. SO YOURE JUST GONNA SIT THERE AND ADMIT HOW WRONG YOU ARE??

20. ugh. yeah. same.

21. who tf picked blue. cmon. red meat incest agenda.

22. SAM MOMMY MILKERS!!!!! hucow sam <3

23. Mixed on this one! My response is obviously yellow :)

24. I do think Bobby favored Dean somewhat.

25. Johnzazel agenda so true

26. HIGHKEY CANON. AND SEXY

27. someone requested a combination of blue and yellow and you’re so right i apologize.

28. mixed on this one for top vs bottom fans! almost a 50/50 split

29. ANNA DID NOTHING WRONG

30. I can’t believe this one is almost 50/50. Ruby girlboss you guys are haters

31. again. admitting you’re dry. THEY FUCKED

32. yeah :(

33. Q-anon level conspiracy theory.

34. I actually fall into the blue. I do believe Cas was in love with Dean, but not the other way around. I think Cas loving Dean makes wincest so much more spicy

35. I love sam so much

36. those of you who answered yes........join my movement.

37. c’mon. even if you don’t ship wincest you need to admit this one.

38. sorry this one was self-indulgent.

39. JESS PEGGED SAM.

40. idk, i personally think Cassie deffo pegged Dean. She has top energy.

41. So all the people who answered no have definitely not read the fic (were too young to remember it) or are squicked by underage which is ok! its one of those fics i read back in 2010 so i have fond memories of it

42. hahahah you guys were mean on this one

43. it’s canon bro sorry

44. thank god this one was majority yellow

45. i give wincestiel a valid pass! dean has multiple holes

46. Jack is hole <3

47. I actually think both are great (and ppl were mad I didn’t have that option srry) but deanpussy is incredible and underrated.

48. SEXY>>>>>>

49. thank you for enabling me.

50. can you guess the redacted part? it was: insert various objects into himself :))))

51. ok heres the big question! i’m not surprised ilysmmbb won, but i personally vote for “yeah, there he is” !! i think its underrated and such a tender moment.

52. i’m in the blue. i like cas.

53. i actually am in the yellow on this one. i think its more realistic, although blue is hot forsure

54. top 3 cas moment right there.

55. objectively yes on this one. thank god for COVID- *gets shot at*

56. sorry this was shady i’m not really like this usually haha. i think death is my fave besides Rowena

57. obviously i’m in the red. i’m shocked that so many people said Yes.......

58. Clearly.

59. I enjoyed fan fiction! i love campy episodes as you all know (like Dog Dean afternoon and such) so i loved fan fiction. it was a nice nod to someone like me who has been watching for a long time.

60. HOW THE FUCK COULD YOU NOT KNOW WHO ANDY IS. i wish he would have been in the show longer........

61. uh....yeah.

62. Yeah c’mon. Dean would and you know it.

63. Thank god you guys didn’t fuck this up. I would agree, but Corbett is a close second for me.

64. IN THE RED BABY!!!!

65. we love a man bleeding out. we do.

66. i actually think misha is chill with J2 but.....you can’t deny J3 have more chemistry.

67. I uh......don’t think Dean would be a great father. is this me projecting my own issues with my father onto Dean? maybe,,,,

68. i’m surprised this was so negative! I think i would be interested

69. thanks for reading my shitty poetry!! i also had s4 dean in mind when writing this

70. CMON.....ITS KINDA SEXY CMON.......that spice of battered wife syndrome.......violent man in the house.......sam beaten down....im barking

71. haha yessss go yellow.

72. go yellow again.

73. I think I would actually vote yellow on this one. what a sweet and beautiful thing to say to someone, and its so very DEAN.

74. mhm. i think so. 

75. SEXY CONTROLLING OLDER BROTHER!!!!!

76. no idea why people answered yes to this one. that punch was fucked up. was it sexy? thats another story,,

77. WOKE. 

78. I do. I love pilot Dean.

79. Dean is a carfucker. any side of the fandom can recognize that

80. thank you GREEN!!!!!!

81. Sam is bi wtf! Sera Gamble erasure

82. Padackles commune <33333 they all fuck and they don’t know whose kid is whose!!!! (not really but this is sexy)

83.  THESE BROTHERS ARE WEIRD FOR SURE.

[flyonthewallmedstudent]

Re-watching House as a Physician. Pilot Episode. Neurology in the young.

I’d actually recommend this as an exercise.  Re-watching this as a means to motivate studying. It’s truly terrible watching it. So much so, that you want to do it properly or throw shit at the TV. 

If I had students and we couldn’t physically see patients I’d probably tell them what episode to watch and we’d go through the cases together. Go through all the things the team does wrong. Then discuss the things you don’t know yourself.

Because that is actually how you learn best.  Recovering from your mistakes. Identifying gaps in knowledge. 

Unfortunately, all my current students are final years and they do have to see real patients. 

Opening episode: 29 year old female, no past medical history has expressive dysphasia then a first seizure.  How do we know it’s expressive dysphasia?

IN the episode, the patient notices she’s having trouble getting words out, and is able to write. Then has a seizure. Wilson actually has a good introductory statement here. House finds the case boring, this really isn’t boring. If it doesn’t excite a physician it should certainly terrify them. A la house of god, rule number X = Treat the dying young. With urgency. The majority of patients I see in IM are in their 70s-90s, have predictable issues like metabolic syndrome, heart failure, arrhythmias like atrial fibrillation, infections like community acquired pneumonia and dementia. These are my bread and butter. 

More often than not, my primary role is to ensure a dignified end of life care. Many of them come in already at death’s door or will be imminently there. To continue to push them through medical treatment when they no longer have resilience to go through them, is to prolong suffering. 

You can’t predict how someone young will respond even to the most aggressive of treatment. You give them every chance you have. OFten if the young are sick, it’s really bad. With the elderly, a common cold can make them really sick as their body is in decline. 

Young patients with a single organ system issue will usually go to a subspecialty.  Actually any medical subspecialty or IM in general is considered “diagnostic medicine”. It’s just different flavours of it. 

1st seizures: - it’s rare to have a second.  - usually the cause of underlying seizures is infection - follow-up is clinic with neurology. It’s rare to require further.  - we could go into differential seizures, but that’s a whole other post in itself

(Epilepsy only occurs if you have a number of them and this is rare)

In the case of House, they jump straight to cancer like webmd.

Before they do much, she jumps straight to radiation therapy. This is completely unrealistic. This sort of thing requires multidisciplinary teams to pour over all her results and discuss the best way forward. Chemo and radiotherapy are notorious in the general public for having crazy toxicities. For obvious reasons.

It’s weird re-watching these, where medicine is no longer a foreign language. Actually, it’s watching someone for whom English is a new language and they haven’t really gotten it yet. The tense and grammar are all wrong. 

I watched the Queens Gambit - holy fuck is chess a foreign world and language. I know the basics, but none of the strategies. Sicillian sounds like a great name for a tasty pizza. Or something else. 

Anyways, it takes a whole lot of time before they get to differentials. 

Honestly, you would be getting to these the minute you hear the presenting complaint. Then considering how to rule them in and out. For students, always have the surgical sieve in mind. 

Differential diagnosis of expressive dysphasia in a young woman are then addressed in the episode. here’s what they consider: - Aneurysm and stroke (haemorrhagic stroke in this case if we’re talking aneurysm), incidentally most common cause of berry aneurysms is high blood pressure. this is a decent consideration. but you would have seen it on imaging from the start. 

- CJD = very much mad zebra. I wouldn’t even suggest this. You would if it was rapid onset dementia or behvarioural changes and they came from high risk areas (eg ate burgers in the UK in the 1980s and 90s). But rapid meaning weeks to months. Not sudden onset within minutes. It’s more stroke.  - Cncephalopathy: requires an LP to go over this, and she doesn’t present with a fever either. regardless, important to consider. would always consider an LP in addition to imaging.  - Wernicke’s: only consider if they have a nutritional disorder like severe, chronic anorexia (which she doesn’t have) or heavy alcohol use. This is caused by thiamine/VitB1 deficiency. A thiamine level test takes days or weeks. We would never wait for a thiamine test to come back, you’d treat IV thiamine straightaway. I mean it’s vitamin B. This is a terrible differential to consider so near the top. She also doesn’t really have the other symptoms.

Then there’s the more obvious differentials they didn’t bother to consider: The greatest mimic for a stroke particularly in young women is migraine. You can have similar neurology, but it’s often associated with a headache.  If we wanted to chase zebras in the young, you could consider a PFO (holes in the heart that are congenitally there) and thromboemboli causing stroke. (In other words, you develop a clot, normally the lungs will pick up the clot like a filter before it gets to the brain. But the clot can bypass the lungs via holes in the heart and give you a stroke). This is always the consideration in cryptogenic strokes (in which you have a young patient without any reason for having an atheroma causing stroke). Risk factors for thromboemboli can include the oral contraceptive pill (estrogen can be thrombogenic) and then long periods of immobility, think long haul flights or trauma to the long bones or surgery. IN rare cases, those who had particular types of heart surgery as an infant, like a Fontan’s. But this is very niche mind you. And they’re often already on preventative therapy. Infection is a key thing to consider, where there are risk factors. she’s not immunosuppressed or done any exotic travel or eaten raw foods she shouldn’t have eaten (raw pork, bad sushi etc.). It’s a shame they didn’t mention it early. THere’s a few infections that go to the brain but you’d often have these in mind with the risk factors as stated before. THe imaging is often a giveaway

Learning point here - always eat cooked pork! Finally, cancer. But it’d be obvious on imaging if you’d already developed seizures or focal neurology, the lesions would already be large enough to pick up. the sad part to many brain tumours is that they’re already very large by the time of presentation. Beau Biden for instance, presented with acute confusion before his diagnosis, preceding that he had weakness and altered sensation (the lesion was likely too small at the time to be picked up on imaging and was diagnosed as a stroke). 

I would rarely be referred brain tumours, the emergency department will have scanned the brain and seen something that would prompt referral to the neurosurgeons. When you’re young and have a lesion/tumour, any team will try everything, including majority surgery, to salvage what life is left. it is very tragic. 

Anyway, stopping here. Already too much stuff to dissect and unpack from just the first episode alone. Note that I’m in IM, no doubt a neurologist or neurosurgeon will have different opinions on this episode. Ha. 

[bbugyu]

finding something to do + kim mingyu

you had spent your better years bored with mingyu, and he thought holding your hand felt like holding his fleeting youth.

wc.4088 | almost smut, mostly fluff, friends to lovers/uni au, fem reader, that one trope where there is mutual pining but both of them think the other is gay, maybe like half an ounce of angst if you squint Really Hard, lots o swears

i usually make my fics hella neutral as far as gender and size and orientation goes but hahahaha this ones for the average sized bi girls! also just realized that i stopped using capitalization in my fics and yk what? im fine with it. this fic is based off of the song of the same name by hellogoodbye.

*

“stop honking, other people live here.”

mingyu grinned at you through the half-open passenger window, leaning over to pop open the door. the handle had never recovered from a giant cup of soda crashing into the side of his ride in the middle of a particularly rowdy summer shenanigan, the sticky substance soaking into the mechanics before he had gotten the chance to hose it down in a friend's driveway at 2am. now, you had to wait for him to open it from the inside on all future shenanigans, and you could only roll the window down half way, lest you have to laugh at mingyu aggressively pulling on the window between his palms as you pulled on the motorized switch to coerce it back into the closed position. you slid into the co-pilot seat and looked over to your best friend.

"if you answered your texts i wouldn't have to honk."

you rolled your eyes, tugging on the seatbelt. "go, gyu."

he laughed and shifted into drive, turning up his stereo as he pulled away from your apartment building, hand returning to the stick to shift up a gear. "thanks for coming."

"what else was i gonna do?" you slipped the slides off your socked feet and pulled your legs to sit cross-legged. "i finished rewatching avatar."

"study, maybe?"

you looked at him. he was right, finals were right around the corner, but you had an uncharacteristically light load this quarter (due to you not realizing you needed approval for one course before registration and it filling before you could sign up) and you weren't too worried about the three tests you would have to take in a couple weeks. "could say the same to you."

mingyu let out another laugh, suddenly singing along to the song as he ran a hand through his hair. you smiled at his profile, then pulled out your phone to update your instagram story. as you moved the camera over to mingyu from the streetlight-lit road ahead of you, he laughed midway through a lyric and practically yelled "mwoya" at you, gripping the wheel with both hands and jumping in his seat. 

you laughed hysterically, frantically saving the video before pointing the screen at him. he turned down the music to watch it, eyes flickering between your phone and the road. he laughed at the way it cut off on both of you screaming. "what was that?"

you giggled, swiping through filters. "you being dumb."

"you love me."

"you're right."

mingyu smiled at that, adjusting the stereo volume again, bobbing his head to the rhythm as he drove to the one convenience store in your town that sold his favorite mint chocolate chip ice cream, a mission he had called upon you for at 11:30pm. when it switched over to a song you knew, mingyu noticed your subconscious humming to the tune and a few lyrics falling out of your lips, the wind from the open window whipping through your hair.

by the time you reached a small parking lot across town, you had yawned probably half a dozen times.

"tired?" mingyu pouted as he rolled up the windows and unbuckled his seatbelt. "sorry for dragging you out."

you shook your head, following suit and pulling yourself out of the car. "i slept too late, i think. i'll be fine."

you followed mingyu across the quiet street to the convenience store the two of you frequented perhaps too often, finding yourself there after late night study sessions or mid-barhop for ramen, snacks, and most importantly, the mint choco ice cream bar of mingyu's affections.

after perusing the options as if you hadn't been there earlier in the week, you picked out an ice cream bar as well as a couple bags of chips. you walked up behind mingyu at the register as he was pulling out his wallet.

"i'll pay if you come over and play smash," he said, nodding at your hands full of snacks.

you eyed him. "what's the catch?"

"you can't be mad when i play meta knight."

you groaned, but put your things on the counter for the cashier that was likely the same age as you both to scan. "fine. i'll still beat you."

mingyu grinned at you, and you snagged your ice cream bar off the counter as he paid, the other snacks getting put in a plastic bag. you grabbed the bag and held it open as mingyu retrieved his own ice cream, both of you peeling them open as you exited the convenience store.

"mm," you let out, mouth full of ice cream as you leaned against the metal bar meant to lock up bikes on the sidewalk. "it's nice out tonight."

mingyu agreed, biting into his treat. "it's refreshing but not too cold."

you nodded, watching cars pass on the street. "i can't believe it's almost summer already."

"me neither," he said, squatting in front of you as he ate. "we're gonna be seniors next year."

you groaned. "have you decided if you're doing summer quarter?"

he shook his head. "i decided against it. i only really have to take one extra course next year so it didn't feel worth it."

you nodded, looking down at him. he was looking to his left, absentmindedly watching someone walk their dog across the street.

after the ice cream was finished and you threw away your wrappers, mingyu cursed slightly at the fact that he still managed to get his finger sticky despite doing his best to avoid meltage. after he popped open your door, he dug in the glovebox for some wet naps, playfully knocking your knees aside as you tried to sit. you laughed, waiting for him to be done so you could put the bag of snacks on the floor in front of you.

when you met mingyu sophomore year, your hair was shorter and he was blonde. he had sat next to you in your shared ecology lab and promptly fell asleep before the class had even started, and you had to nudge him awake when the professor was handing out the syllabus. 

"gah, fuck, i'm up," he waved a massive hand in your face, blinking away his sleep before focusing on you with furrowed brows. "you're not seokmin."

seokmin was his roommate, you learned, and also met a few weeks later when you went over to their dorm to work on assignments together. they've since upgraded to a compact but efficient three bedroom apartment and acquired another roommate. you stared out the window into the night sky as mingyu drove to said apartment, blinking heavily at the lure of a nap. you pulled your knees up to your chest and tried to listen to the song playing from the stereo.

only moments later, mingyu glanced over and noticed that your eyes had fluttered shut, your head lolling against the window. he wondered, staring at you in awe, how much longer he could pretend he wasn't in love with you.

when you and mingyu had first gotten to know each other, you admittedly had a bit of a crush on him, until you found out he had a boyfriend. even after they split almost four months later, and you had been there to bring him chicken and beer while he fumbled with the drawstrings of his sweatpants and rubbed his swollen eyes with the back of his hand, you decidedly resigned any feelings for him, knowing it was a lost cause for you to pine after a guy that didn't even like girls. hell, you barely even liked boys - you had gone on dates with six different girls, yet not a single guy since you came to university, and mingyu had sat on your bed while you tried to get ready, giving a concise "try again" when you showed him an oversized sweatshirt.

"why not this?" you asked, groaning.

"you have good proportions, bitch. show 'em off."

rolling your eyes, you rooted around in your closet for something less shapeless. your style had always skewed a little athletic, a little hip-hop. you bought mostly mens fit shirts, making the task slightly more difficult. you found a nice pair of high waisted jeans you hadn't worn in a while and paired it with a drop shoulder tee and a turtleneck, finally getting the approval of your best friend.

all of the facts laid in front of him led mingyu to believe you were completely and utterly gay, and even if you weren't, your taste in women suggested he was the exact opposite of your type. you liked petite girls. girls with long hair and that wore skirts and lots of rings. the kind of girls that you had to lean down to kiss. 

so he continued to try out the pool of eligible bachelors in your area that were within a respectable age range. he had even tried to date some girls, but every time they tried to suggest the dates go further, he would think of the way his best friend's fingers had sent electricity through his entire body just by brushing an eyelash off his lip, or how you would trace the veins that ran through his wrist as you watched a movie together on your couch. the way your touch set his skin on fire. the way he wished he could just admit the way he felt about you. 

he always smiled and said he'd call them sometime. he never did. it wasn't fair to them, but neither was him only ever asking them out because they reminded him of you somehow.

guys were easier, he thought. they didn't remind him of you.

mingyu was so caught up in the sight of you sleeping that he absolutely ran a red. he cursed under his breath when he realized the light he was passing under had been yellow for longer than he had thought, thinking how lucky he was that the cross street was empty. good thing he was almost home.

"hey, sleepyhead," he said when you stretched suddenly as he pulled into his parking spot. "do you wanna go home?"

you shook your head, yawning. "no, i need to eat chips."

he laughed and killed the engine. "you left a pair of house shorts here and you can borrow a shirt," he said, suggesting you crash in his bed when you got too tired for smash.

"what, you don't wanna carry me home?"

mingyu slammed the car door shut and shoved his hand in his pocket. "i'd rather not, no."

you stretched again, a hand reaching out to ruffle his dark hair as he tried to punch in the door code for you to enter his building. "mean."

he laughed at you again, leading you up the three flights of stairs to his apartment.

"hey, minghao," you said, waving at the shadowy figure that was seemingly melting into the couch, illuminated by the tv.

he raised a hand in acknowledgment, sitting with his neck at a 90 degree angle, a movie with subtitles on, and his phone face down on his chest. "yo."

"wanna play smash?" mingyu asked.

"no thanks."

mingyu dropped his keys on the kitchen counter. "we're playing smash."

"you're funny."

you laughed, and mingyu pouted. "please, myungho?"

minghao finally looked at his roommate. "i'm watching annihilation. the switch is handheld for a reason."

you watched mingyu roll his eyes with a smirk on your lips. he went over to the switch dock by the tv and grabbed the console, sticking his tongue out at hao. you giggled, following mingyu down the short hall to his room as minghao waved you both off.

"have i said that i like hao a lot?"

"yes," mingyu said. "like, every time you come over."

you smiled, throwing open his dresser and carding through the shirts that would surely be massive on you. "well i do."

the switch got tossed onto his bed and he sneaked around you to grab a pair of sweatpants from the drawer above the one you were looking in. he also pulled out the pair of shorts you had left, putting them on top of the dresser. "i'm getting naked now."

you shook your head lightly, knowing he was only changing his pants, but kept your back to him out of respect anyways. you picked up the shorts. "did you wash these?"

"yeah, i threw 'em in with my laundry last week."

you nodded, spotting the color you had been looking for. "aha!" you pulled on the ashy gray shirt, revealing one of your favorite things you had ever convinced mingyu to buy. an extremely soft, lightly distressed shirt with a tasteful rip along the neckline. "i'm getting naked now."

"clear," mingyu said, letting you know he wasn't looking as he flopped onto his bed, propping up the switch on his bedside table and setting up the controllers.

you pulled off your loose sweatshirt and swapped it for the borrowed shirt, then shoved the denim shorts down your legs, laughing lightly at how your sleep shorts completely disappeared under the shirt. you turned around, stretching out your arms to show how large the shirt was on you. "look."

mingyu rolled onto his back and propped himself on an elbow to look at you, giggling as you swam in his shirt. outwardly, he smiled, but internally, he thought this was simultaneously the worst and best idea he had ever had.

you looked absolutely stunning in his clothes, he thought, but only said that you were cute. he ignored the familiar feeling in his stomach and handed you a controller as you crawled onto his bed, settling on your stomach next to him.

he had to stop putting himself in this position. you were far too pretty for him to forget his feelings towards you.

but maybe that's what he wanted. maybe he didn't want to forget his feelings. maybe the few times you had told him his dates were attractive weren't just objective reassurances. maybe he held onto the sliver of hope that you could possibly be attracted to him, too.

you slammed your face into the bed as the game loaded. "why are all switch load times utter ass?"

mingyu adjusted so that he was laying on his side with an arm propping him up and flicked the back of your head. "because the console can fit in my palm."

your hand went up to swat at the culprit of the flick, and you pouted as you lifted your head to look at him. "that's not fair, your hands are huge." you wiggled onto your elbows to grab his wrist, pressing your palms together. "see?"

mingyu laughed, feeling his cheeks heat up. "well, you have baby hands, so." he punctuated his point by curling his finger over yours. you pouted again, then slipped your fingers between his, thinking about how nice his warm hand felt over yours.

you blinked, then pulled your hand away and grabbed the joycon as the game finally loaded the skippable intro, hoping you weren't blushing too much as you cleared your throat. mingyu stared at your pink cheeks for a moment, his mind reeling. was he seeing something that wasn't there? or was his hope in you validated?

you were clicking through the menu and felt his eyes on you, and all you wanted to do was hide behind your hair and avoid eye contact. you nearly jumped when mingyu cleared his throat.

"hey, i have something i've been meaning to ask you."

your eyes met his briefly. "shoot."

"do you…" mingyu paused, trying to think of the right way to phrase his question. "i know you have exes that are guys, but is that something you're, like… still into?"

your ears burned and you wiggled until you could sit back on your own legs, fiddling with the hem of the shirt you stole and hesitating to make eye contact. "you mean, being with guys?"

"yeah," he said, watching you intently with his brows furrowed.

"yeah, i mean, i guess?" you shrugged. "i like both."

mingyu nodded slowly, watching your eyes as they stared at the wall across his small room. your cheeks were a rosy pink, and you were chewing on your lip. "me too."

you looked at him finally, your eyes wide. "what?"

he gave you a crooked smile. "i like guys and girls, too."

if you were blushing before, now you were blazing. "oh, my god, i'm an idiot."

he laughed. "what, did you think i was, like, totally gay?"

"shut up," you threw yourself down onto his bed, hiding your face in the blanket. in your defense, he had definitely called himself gay before, but you definitely called yourself gay constantly, so maybe you shouldn't put so much weight in those words. "shut up, i'm embarrassed. i don't want to talk about it."

hearing mingyu laugh next to you made you feel like you were on fire, then you felt the ghosting of fingers on your arm. you froze. mingyu's voice was soft when he spoke again. "do you wanna talk about how i have a massive crush on you?"

you slowly raised your head to look at him, cheeks burning red. he gave you a small smile before you choked out a "huh?"

"i ran a red earlier," he said suddenly, his fingers moving from your arm to absentmindedly brush your hair out of your face, then to your shoulder, then back. it was a reassuring touch, one you had felt from him before, but you still were caught off guard by his sudden succession of confessions. "you were sleeping and i couldn't stop looking at you. i totally could have crashed the car."

"dude, what the fuck." you stared at him, then lowered your voice to imitate him. "'hey i have a crush on you and i almost killed us both because of it.' that's you, that's what you sound like right now."

mingyu laughed in your face and you couldn't help the chuckle that fell out of your mouth. "sorry i almost killed us."

"i guess i can forgive you," you said, picking at your nails suddenly despite them being clean. "especially because i might have a crush on you, too."

mingyu kept staring at you with a fond smile, and you wondered if he could also hear how hard your heart was beating. "can i kiss you?"

you looked at him, trying not to stare at his lips. you nodded, almost hurriedly. his hand pulled against your back as you rolled your body to face him, and your hand reached out for his jaw as he pulled you into him. and when his lips crashed into yours, you yelped slightly, melting into him almost immediately. they were plush against yours, and he was gentle as he pushed your back onto the mattress, adjusting to hover over you slightly. when you let your head fall back onto the bed, he grinned at your blown out pupils and swollen lips, buzzing at the way your hands curled around around his neck, fingers digging into the hair at his nape. he adjusted again, a hand finding your waist as he pulled back to let you swing your leg across his lap. you pulled him back over you, enjoying the way his hips hit the back of your thighs as he caged you in with an elbow by your shoulder. you stared up at him, heart racing, eyes flicking down to his lips too many times for him to not take the hint.

mingyu had always enjoyed pleasing you. this definitely felt like the next natural progression.

he dove into you, and your arms wrapped themselves around his shoulders. mingyu was a hugger, and he also liked wearing very little clothing when he worked out, so you knew what he looked like under the plain white tee. knew what he felt like. but suddenly - with his hands slipping under what was technically his shirt to properly feel your waist, with how his tongue fought with yours - you really felt him for the first time. the way his shoulder muscles rippled just beneath the skin as he adjusted, clearly trying to not make his growing bulge so obvious. you considered the fact that you might get to see how much leg day really benefited, considering how much he posted about it with sweaty post-workout pictures on his story.

mingyu felt your thighs squeeze around his hips, pulling back slightly. "is this okay?"

"is it?" you responded, a hand pulling back to fall on his jaw. "i've wanted you for ages."

he laughed lightly. "god, we're idiots."

you had no time to respond before he was kissing you again, his hips rolling into yours, pulling a surprised moan from you. he ate it up, his fingers gripping your waist tighter at the sound. you felt his girth as it pressed against you, and you gasped. when was the last time you had been with a guy? high school?

when mingyu's teeth bit down on your lip, you were really glad he was the guy you were unconsciously waiting for.

he tugged on your hips as he rolled onto his back, pulling you to straddle his lap. you giggled slightly, settling back into the open mouthed kisses as he ran his hands from your ass up your back, slipping under the sports bra you were wearing.

then there was a knock. you yelped, burying your face in his shoulder as you heard the door swing open. "make room for king k r- oh shit!"

you laughed into mingyu's neck as he yelled for seokmin to get the hell out, his hands tugging the hem of the stolen shirt over your butt in an attempt to shield it from view. you heard him squeak out an "i'm sorry!" as the door shut again.

"i'll kill him."

you exhaled, the laughter still on your lips as you looked at his profile from where your cheek pressed against his shoulder. "bet he thinks we're secretly dating."

mingyu laughed, scratching an eyebrow before returning his palm to your ass. "not a secret now."

"oh, so we're dating now?"

mingyu craned his neck to look at you. "is that not what was going to happen?"

you giggled, sitting up and putting your hands on his chest. you adjusted your knees, fully aware of how the movement would rub you against his still hard bulge. "we have both fucked people without dating them afterwards, kim mingyu."

"ah," he said, digging his fingers into your soft ass and rutting into you gently, making you gasp. "we're gonna fuck? i thought we were just joking."

you slapped his chest, giggling still as you rolled your hips. "if you don't wanna, i could ask hao-"

"oh, shut up," he said, pulling you down to kiss him. "if you liked myungho like that you would have tried it ages ago."

you smiled, your thumb running over his adams apple as you placed gentle kisses on his jaw. "sweetie, are we jealous?"

"i don't deserve this, you know?" mingyu pulled your hips against him again, a low grunt tumbling from his beautiful mouth. "i haven't put my dick in a girl since i met you and now i'm with you and you're talking about my roommate? this seems extremely mean."

you giggled again, then placed your lips on his again. he instantly kissed you back, one hand leaving your ass to go to the back of your neck. "you're the only guy i ever think about," you whispered, getting repeatedly interrupted by mingyu's needy lips on yours.

the wolf-like grin that broke onto his face sent chills down your spine. "let's keep it that way."

*

seokmin's hand was still on the doorknob, his wide eyes blinking, when minghao paused his movie and sat up to poke his head out and look down the hall. "the hell was that?"

he puffed out his cheeks as he walked back into the living room, his palms clapping gently. "i thought you said y/n came over to play smash?"

minghao's eyebrow quirked up. "she did."

the eldest sat on the couch. "i thought mingyu was gay?"

"what?" minghao looked down the hall again. "wait, what? were they-" he stopped when he heard a muffled groan that was far too familiar.

seokmin grabbed the remote and pressed play, scratching his cheek as he turned up the volume. "what are we watching? catch me up."

[hanamakkiss]

Making a Difference

Ushijima Wakatoshi x reader

summary: You find out what Ushijima Wakatoshi thinks of you.

a/n: hurt/comfort? if im classifying it wrong lemme know oki. also not really proof read 

Why did you like Ushijima? Because he's handsome, tall and most importantly, he wasn't the type to lead you on.

He was straightforward, never one to beat around the bush. What he said was what he meant, he didn't waste time lying. He wasn't kind, but he wasn't unkind either. He never had an ulterior motive.

You took comfort in the knowledge that Ushijima wouldn't hang out with you if he didn't want to.

His confidence wasn't a sign of arrogance. It was merely him trusting his abilities and hardwork. When he wanted something, he doesn't think about the possibility of failing, he just works towards his goals. Something about the way he oozed decisiveness was just so attractive.

Always facing the future, never stopping to doubt himself.

When you first met him, you were intimidated by his stature and charisma. His stoic face and blunt replies were something you had never encountered.

After multiple interactions, you started to find his way of reacting to situations refreshing and cute. How he always skipped pleasantries to get to the point just wormed its way into your heart.

Guessing correctly that he wasn't the type to chase anyone, you took it upon yourself to befriend him. After months and months of talking to him, the two of you finally had some sort of hang-out schedule where you ate together everyweek or so.

This week you two were at a cafe you frequented.

Having ended your story about messing up your math test, you spent some time just appreciating your ice cream sundae. Feeling ansty, you peered over. He was mindlessly sipping an Iced Americano while looking through the window. You let slip what has been plaguing your mind recently.

"Hey, Toshi, do you enjoy hanging out with me?" you questioned between spoonfuls.

He blinks, surprised. Taking another sip, he mulls it over, "I don't think it makes a difference,"

You feel your heart sink.

Cocking your head, "Then why do you hang out with me?"

"Because you asked." It is a statement, not a question. He says it so matter-of-factly, you feel stupid for not realising it earlier.

Then it cracks.

You give a strained laugh, "What do you mean by that, we're friends right?" you're grasping at straws.

He ponders, "I suppose we are,"

He doesn't even think about you enough to form an opinion.

Crack.

He doesn't dislike you, but he doesn't like you, either. It made no difference to him if you were in his life or not.

Crack.

Why did you like Ushijima? Because he's handsome, tall and most importantly, he wasn't the type to lead you on.

But in all your daydreams, you forgot the possibility that you wouldn't even matter to him. That he wouldn't even think of you as someone to lead on.

Crack.

The rest of the conversation is done on auto-pilot.

Crack.

You smiled and waved at him as you parted ways to go home.

You watch the fissures in your heart extend and connect until it shatters just as he leaves your line of sight.

You watch it fall through the gaps between your hands along with all your careful rationalisations you made to ensure you wouldn't get your feelings played. But in the end, the only person hurt was you, again.

This time, you couldn't even fault the other party.

The next few days passed in a daze. You completely stopped approaching Ushijima. As you now expected, he didn't seem to notice, or he just didn't care.

Ushijima Wakatoshi has been feeling a little off these few days. His chest feels a little tighter? He doesn't know what it is or how it happened, but he knows something in his days is different now.

My health is in good condition, practice is normal, what else could it be? Before he could reach a conclusion, a pair of hands clasped onto his shoulder.

"Oi Wakatoshi, what happened to your puppy," Tendou leans in close to him.

He stares back, "I don't have a pet."

The other boy just laughs, "I was talking about the girl! The one that always trailed after you like a pup," he opens his locker, obscuring his face.

After a few moments of silence, he peeked out, "The one with a high ponytail? Pretty and short?"

"Are you referring to y/n?" he finally answers.

"Yes! That's the girl," his head disappears again. "Don't you think she reminds you of a puppy? Always chasing after you, and all."

Ushijima frowns, "She reminds me of her," he picks up his bag, closing the locker. "And she doesn't chase after me."

Tendou guffaws, "Classic Wakatoshi," he mimes wiping his eyes, "should've known you were gonna say that," he pats him on the back, nudging him towards the door, "Did you finally reject her? Is that why she hasn't been around you lately?"

"She doesn't like me," Ushijima locks up the room.

Tendou stuffs his hand into his pockets, "Please, everyone except you could tell she has a crush on you," he exhales, watching his breath condense.

"She never said anything to me,"

"Duh, you're not exactly the romantic type, it must have been intimidating to confess to you. Well, if you didn't reject her, then what did you do to make her mad?"

Ushijima stops walking, "I didn't do anything."

"You sure? Oh well, if you want her to stay in your life, you better do something about it quick," he turns back, "else I might swoop in to catch her, you know?" he grins.

Ushijima’s brow’s furrow. He might not know what was different in his days now, but the thought of Tendou hanging around you caused the feeling in his chest to tighten.

"Would you like to visit the cafe with me today?"

You freeze while packing your bag. Looking up, you blink a few times.

Sure enough, Ushijima Wakatoshi stands in front of your desk, waiting. Your eyebrows shoot towards your hairline. In the whole year you spent hanging around him, he has never once initiated an outing.

Confusion enters your mind, "Uh, is there a reason for this or...?"

"I just want to," he furrows his brows, "unless you're busy?"

You try not to let your hopes soar, "No! No, I'm not busy," you give him a small smile, "wait a bit for me to pack,"

The walk with him is silent.

Your mind was too busy running a mile a minute, trying to rationalise the situation. He wants to hang out with me? He probably just needs a favour right? Thoughts cycled between hopeful and resigned. Discreetly looking at him, softly squeaking when you realise he’s frowning while staring ahead. Is he mad at me? But for what?

Ushijima on the other hand, had just as much on his mind. While walking with you like this, close enough that your hands could almost brush each other, he notes that the tightness in his chest dissipates. The implications of this puzzled him. 

Is this a symptom of a sickness that can only be relieved by being around you? What kind of sickness is that? He’s thinking it over when Tendou’s words enter his mind. 

"Please, everyone except you could tell she has a crush on you,"

He glances at you, looking flustered and deep in thought. Do you have a crush on him? He doesn’t know the answer, but the thought of it made his chest flutter. Does he have a crush on you? Is what he finds himself asking. 

He imagines he had a choice between hanging out with you or not, and he finds himself picking the former. In that choice, he realises his answer.

While walking through the park before the cafe, he stops.

You turn back to face him, cocking your head, "Is something wrong....?"

The question hangs in the air, sending your mind into overdrive.

"Do you like me?"

Your entire face flushes, "Wha-? Why are you asking?" there's nowhere to hide, so you settle for looking anywhere else.

"Because I think I like you," your eyes snap to his, mouth agape, "and I want to know if you feel the same way,"

You stare at him, mouth still slack, brain coming up with a million different ways he could be joking before you suck in a deep breath, calming yourself. Eyes clenched shut, you think.

Why did you like Ushijima? Because he's handsome, tall and most importantly, he wasn't the type to lead you on.

He doesn’t know a joke if it hit him in the face. What he said was what he meant. Now he’s telling you he thinks he has feelings for you. Time to give him an answer. 

Tilting your head up to maintain eye contact, “Yes, I...I do like you,” your words come out shakier than you intended.

His expression remains grave, but you think you see a light pink dust his cheeks, “Do you want to go out with me?” 

Your eyes god wide, “Uh...I would love you? I would love to!” you slap a hand to your mouth at your slip up, way to early to be saying I love yous! You’re pulled out of your spiraling by a deep chuckle. 

You look up to see a small smile on his face, air still ringing with his soft laughter “I’m glad to hear that,” he steps towards you, “we should get going if we want to make it before the crowd,” 

“Uh... yea,” you manage to squeak out while he maneuvers your body towards the cafe. You follow along in a daze.

Ushijima confessed to you, and you got to see him smile and hear him laugh. You wonder if this is a dream, did your daydreams make you hallucinate? His hand reaching to intertwine with yours removes any doubt you have. 

Nah, you squeeze his hand, no daydream of mine could come up with something as good as this, smiling as the two of you enter the cafe.

[robotnuts]

i feel insane. ive rewatched seasons 1-17 over the past 2 weeks bc i saw rvbzcrit posts and wanted to know what was up, particularly bc i saw u getting such staunch defenders in your inbox. what the hell, man. its so bad i dont understand how they made it this bad. by accident. i cant even praise the animation or the action scenes honestly, if i had to pick my favourite parts of the new season it would be the foley, raymonds burger king logo armour, and phases teleportation. theres nothing else

rvb:z could have worked if it was about the lieutenants, lol. i think 8 episodes about them having to work together bc the reevbs were somehow incapacitated and having to be carolinas new elite force would have been really fucking good and instead we have these barely established characters doing god knows what. im in mourning for what we could have had.

(im assuming youre the same anon but if youre not WHOOPS!)

OOH i didn’t notice the foley. i agree phase’s teleportation was extremely cool. It really feels like a writer’s first draft that got churned out. some of the defenses of it were really wild, for example fiona saying that the characterization was fine because they didn’t have 17 seasons like the original cast did, so they just needed more time. Like..... that’s not how.... writing works.... no one watches the first season of a TV show with terrible characterization and says well maybe next season. Obviously characters get more DEPTH that can be explored with a longer runtime, but you need to get the characters right in the pilot or the show won’t get picked up and people won’t keep watching

also thats such a good idea. recast smith and you have a cast of characters who’s dynamics we already know but also have more depths to plumb. in my fake season post i talked about palomo getting a big head due to being a war hero in the battle of charon which could match like the ONE/lone wolf role for the protagonist. it’d be super cool to explore how the characters have changed post s13. exploring new dynamics and tension between them!!! that would have been really reaelly fun now im mad we didn’t get it. and obviously the stakes could stay on chorus and be much SMALLER than 13, but dealing with rebuilding the planet which is a very personal issue for these characters, so we care about it. UGH . UGH

[waveypedia]

complete and utter chaos [ducktales group chat fic] - Chapter 3

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Ao3 Chapter 4

let kids be kids

6:04 am

TheWebbedWonder: hey guess what

adefinitelyrealboy: Isn’t it before the approved technology time set by Mr. Uncle Donald?

TheWebbedWonder: brilliance waits for no rule, Boyd!

adefinitelyrealboy: Okay!!

Junior-Woodchuck74: you’re corrupting him, webs.

Lou: eh let her

TheWebbedWonder: whatever

TheWebbedWonder: it’s been a while since we had a sleepover��

lenaonme: oh yeah!!!

ICanDeweyIt: and Boyd’s never been to one!!

adefinitelyrealboy: you’re right!! 

adefinitelyrealboy: what does one do at a sleepover?

TheWebbedWonder: They’re super fun!!!

TheWebbedWonder: we watch movies and have pillow fights and discover family mysteries and summon supernatural creatures and fight said supernatural creatures and eat lots of junk food!!!!!

adefinitelyrealboy: Sounds fun!!!

Lou: lmao i love our family

ICanDeweyIt: @Violet-Sabrewing you up? Important convos happening here

Violet-Sabrewing: I am now

lenaonme: vi you’re not fooling anyone

lenaonme: we all know you get up at sunrise

Lou: yeah she’s crazy

Violet-Sabrewing: True, but I was reading.

Junior-Woodchuck74: fair!

lenaonme: omg nerds

TheWebbedWonder: Ok so are we on??

TheWebbedWonder: what about Friday night?

ICanDeweyIt: what’s happening on Friday night?

TheWebbedWonder: it’s the two thousandth anniversary of the Magical Battle of Demogogorna!!!!

Lou: ok hear me out

Lou: can we PLEASE have a sleepover that doesn’t consist of crazy dangerous magical shenanigans for once

Lou: I just wanna sit on the couch and watch scary movies

Junior-Woodchuck74: you do that every day anyways

Lou: yeah but I watch other stuff like Ottoman Empire

Lou: there’s a difference, hubert!!

Junior-Woodchuck74: whatever

Violet-Sabrewing: Thursday night works for Lena and I, but we should check with the adults.

TheWebbedWonder: yeah I’ll ask them when it’s okay for us to be texting

Lou: lmao what a rebel

Family Group Chat!!!!

7:00 am

TheWebbedWonder: good morning everyone!!

mutant-krill!!!!: good morning Little Della!!

Blathering-Blatherskite: gm!!!

TheWebbedWonder: exciting things are happening

Adventure-Pilot: ooh like adventure exciting?

Adventure-Pilot: are you planning an adventure?

TheWebbedWonder: no but I am now!!!

green-sharpie: oh boy

TheWebbedWonder: @Tea Time @aw-phooey @Adventure-Pilot @Scrooge-McDuck @Indy_Sabrewing @purpleisforthegays @dr. mad scientist CAN WE HAVE A SLEEPOVER???????????

Tea Time: At McDuck Manor, I presume?

TheWebbedWonder: yes!

Adventure-Pilot: fine by me!

Scrooge-McDuck: aye, as long as you don’t trash my house again.

Tea Time: It’s not like you were the one cleaning up, sir.

green-sharpie: It wasn’t us!! The ghost Webby, Lena, and Violet summoned had no sense of hygiene.

dr. mad scientist: why did you tag me

TheWebbedWonder: Boyd!!

dr. mad scientist: blathering blatherskite

adefinitelyrealboy: <3

aw-phooey: Webster.

TheWebbedWonder: yes, Uncle Donald?

aw-phooey: it’s 7 am.

TheWebbedWonder: actually, it’s 7:03 am now!

aw-phooey: Webby, you and the kids can’t have planned a sleepover in three minutes

aw-phooey: I told you guys no phones before 7 am!!

green-sharpie: you couldn’t have waited ten minutes webs?

TheWebbedWonder: brilliance waits for no rule!!

aw-phooey: but it does wait for parental punishments

TheWebbedWonder: Oh I almost forgot

TheWebbedWonder added DosCaballero and blackmagica

aw-phooey: !!!

aw-phooey: THE BOYS

blackmagica: WE’RE THREE CABALLEROS

DosCaballero: THREE GAY CABALLEROS

aw-phooey: WE’RE HAPPY AMIGOS

blackmagica: NO MATTER WHERE HE GOES

DosCaballero: THE ONE TWO AND THREE GOES

aw-phooey: WE’RE ALWAYS TOGETHER

green-sharpie: …

aw-phooey: but Webs you’re still in trouble you can’t distract me with my boys

ICanDeweyIt: i thought we were your boys

aw-phooey: you are

aw-phooey: you’re all my boys

Junior-Woodchuck74: 💖💖

Scrooge-McDuck: @blackmagica NO MAGIC IN MY HOUSE

TheWebbedWonder: …

Violet-Sabrewing: …

lenaonme: …

Scrooge-McDuck: okay point taken

Scrooge-McDuck: NO BLACK MAGIC IN MY HOUSE UNLESS YOU’RE BRINGING MY NIECE BACK FROM THE SHADOW REALM

lenaonme: Aww im your niece?

Scrooge-McDuck: yes lass

lenaonme: sldfkdskla;sdlfkhdksl;asldkfhgbfkdl;s

moonlander-general: you worry me.

lenaonme: awww penny you charmer you!!!

moonlander-general: …

Scrooge-McDuck: @blackmagica change. your. name.

green-sharpie: good job using internet speak Uncle Scrooge!!

Scrooge-McDuck: I still only vaguely only know what that means.

Scrooge-McDuck: But I picked up many various languages adventuring. I’m a polyglot!! What’s one more?

TheCrashiestCrash: Good for you Mr. McDee!! Glad you finally found the courage to come out. Love who you love!!!!

Adventure-Pilot: wh

lenaonme: SKDFGHDSKALDKFHDKS

lenaonme: LAUNCHPAD ILY NEVER CHANGE 💖💖

TheCrashiestCrash: okay!!

Scrooge-McDuck: ah, his heart’s in the right place.

Scrooge-McDuck: wait, finally???

green-sharpie: yeah i think webby infested launchpad with the scrooge theory bug

TheWebbedWonder: you make it sound like it’s a bad thing

Scrooge-McDuck: oh curse me kilts

Scrooge-McDuck: I’ve never really felt the need you young people need to label things…

TheWebbedWonder: THEORY CONFIRMED

TheWebbedWonder: thanks uncle scrooge!!

Scrooge-McDuck: ah you’re welcome lass?

Lucky-Gander: haha same Uncle McDunkle!!

Scrooge-McDuck: tattle me tartan, I’m like you!!

Lucky-Gander: lucky you! The Gladstone life is pretty sweet if I do say so myself

green-sharpie: eh he’s not wrong

Scrooge-McDuck: I cannot believe a member of my own family would say something so heartless!!

aw-phooey: oh shoot did i miss the scrooge roasting session

Scrooge-McDuck: Please. I can handle a little heckling!!

Adventure-Pilot: where were you Don?

aw-phooey: in PMs with Zé and Chito.

TheWebbedWonder: those nicknames are so cute omg 🥺

DosCaballero: I am very cute, thank you!!

mutant-krill!!!!: Why don’t Donnie’s and José’s nicknames correlate with yours?

green-sharpie: yeah that’s kinda mean Uncle Donald

green-sharpie: abandoning your friends’ beautifully compatible nicknames

lenaonme: huh cold

lenaonme: i didn’t know you had it in you. I’m impressed uncle d

aw-phooey: oh kids

DosCaballero: Do not worry! Donald didn’t abandon us!

aw-phooey: mine used to but I changed it when the band broke up. too dangerous to keep it ngl

aw-phooey: (you should really change your name, chito)

blackmagica: And I had… other activities that required my attention.

Scrooge-McDuck: You lose more and more of my favor by the minute.

aw-phooey: my friend had your favor?? You’ve gone soft, old man.

blackmagica: Well I have a brilliant idea to appease everyone!!

blackmagica changed their name to TrêsCaballero

aw-phooey changed their name to UnoCaballero

UnoCaballero: how’s that?

DosCaballero: !!!!!! <3

TrêsCaballero: We love you too.

Junior-Woodchuck74: awww!!!

dr. mad scientist: spare me.

Blathering-Blatherskite: Gyro play nice

Adventure-Pilot: yeah Gyro!!!

dr. mad scientist: oh my god shut up.

TrêsCaballero: I did not mean to offend you, Dr. Mad Scientist!!

green-sharpie: he really said duckscord user dr. mad scientist

moonlander-general: But we’re not using duckscord?

ICanDeweyIt: it’s a joke Penny

ICanDeweyIt: wait do you have duckscord???

moonlander-general: Della made me set it up

ICanDeweyIt: FRIEND ME

ICanDeweyIt:  I CRAVE VALIDATION

green-sharpie: we know

ihaveahead!!!: we know

lenaonme: we know

Junior-Woodchuck74: we know

Tea Time: we know

ICanDeweyIt: fine :( be like that

TheWebbedWonder: It’s because we love you 💖

ICanDeweyIt: sldkfghdks Webs how dare

ICanDeweyIt: ily2

ICanDeweyIt: IM GOING IN KIDS CHAT WHERE WEBBY LOVES ME

ICanDeweyIt: LET THE WORLD BURN

Blathering-Blatherskite: ...what???

Scrooge-McDuck: leave it, he’s being dramatic

let kids be kids

10:02 am

 ICanDeweyIt: >:(

Junior-Woodchuck74: dewey are you done moping

ICanDeweyIt: give me one minute

Junior-Woodchuck74: ...fine.

10:03 am

ICanDeweyIt: okay i’m back

Lou: smh

TheWebbedWonder: PARTY PLANNING TIME

TheWebbedWonder: what snacks do we want? Granny’s gonna do a grocery run soon

ICanDeweyIt: cheeto puffs

ICanDeweyIt: because SOMEONE ate them all

Lou: hey, don’t look at me! The rats love fake cheese dust!!

ICanDeweyIt: Beakley did her weekly rat clean the day before they went missing

Lou: ugh okay fine they’re good okay????

Lou: shut up

Junior-Woodchuck: also, HEALTHY snacks!

lenaonme: lame

Lou: seconded

ICanDeweyIt: thirded

Junior-Woodchuck74: Viiiii back me up here

Violet-Sabrewing: I look forward to eating an ungodly amount of junk food and having an impressive sugar crash with the rest of you.

Junior-Woodchuck74: dangit

Junior-Woodchuck74: webby?

TheWebbedWonder: SUGAAAAAAAAR

Junior-Woodchuck74: Beakley never let you near anything sugary so fair enough

Lou: I mean that was for good reason

Lou: she’s almost as bad as you hue

TheWebbedWonder: SUGAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAR

Junior-Woodchuck74: oh boy

Junior-Woodchuck74: Boyd?

adefinitelyrealboy: Getting ice cream with you in Tokyolk was fun, Huey! Let’s do it again at the sleepover!

Junior-Woodchuck74: dangit i’m soft

Junior-Woodchuck74: please put some healthy snacks down there anyway Webby. At least for me.

TheWebbedWonder: already done!!

Junior-Woodchuck74: <3

lenaonme: do Vi and I need to bring anything over aside from the usual?

TheWebbedWonder: idk yet

adefinitelyrealboy: what’s the usual?

Junior-Woodchuck74: we have sleeping bags and pillows but if you want your own you can bring it. Same with plushies and stuffed animals. Toothbrush and hairbrush and that kind of toiletries, but I don’t know how much you use. Your phone, obviously, and anything else you’ll want for the night. But we have a lot of supplies.

adefinitelyrealboy: okay!

adefinitelyrealboy: I don’t have a lot of personal items like that. Most of what I have at the Drakes is just hand-me-downs from Doofus

lenaonme: get in loser we’re going shopping

lenaonme: for personal trinkets for you

ICanDeweyIt: omg <3

ICanDeweyIt: lena you’re my new favorite person

lenaonme: as I should be

adefinitelyrealboy: That’s sweet! Dr. Gearloose and Lil’ Bulb I have been doing that periodically, though. Sometimes Mr. Manny the Headless Manhorse and Dr. Crackshell-Cabrera come along too!!

Lou: I really want to know what’s up with Fenton’s invalid doctorate ngl

Violet-Sabrewing: Me too

Junior-Woodchuck74: 👀 good to know

lenaonme: don’t overanalyze anything hue

TheWebbedWonder: but overanalyzing is the BEST!!

lenaonme: okay you’re the only valid overanalyzer Webs

TheWebbedWonder: 💖💖💖

TheWebbedWonder: Lena and Violet can you come over on Tuesday to help me set up the magical activities?

Lou: oh boy

Violet-Sabrewing: I’ll ask

lenaonme: do you need us to smuggle in anything again?

TheWebbedWonder: no that’s okay! I still have all the books you brought last time, and I think I can get any herbs we need for spells without suspicion as long as it’s not too close to the sleepover date

lenaonme: 👍

Lou: well I staunchly refuse to participate in any more magical adventures than I need to. Tuesday I have a date with some Pep and Ottoman Empire!!

Junior-Woodchuck74: ugh.

TheWebbedWonder: You don’t have to! This is a strictly Team Magic adventure!!

ICanDeweyIt: aw man :(

TheWebbedWonder: uhh that’s okay Dewey you can come if you want!!

ICanDeweyIt: eh it’s all right I just want validation

lenaonme: understandable. see you tuesday!

ICanDeweyIt: 💙💙

Team Uncle McDunkle (les parentals)

10:43 am

Indy_Sabrewing: Violet just asked if she and Lena can go over to McDuck Manor on Tuesday to prepare for the sleepover with Webby

purpleisforthegays: fine w/ me

acepilot: us too

22: so we’re all good with the sleepover at large, correct?

Dadnald: Aside from the fact that the kids were obviously planning it in their own group chat before the agreed tech time minimum

Moneybags: ah let them

Moneybags: they’re just excited

Dadnald: Unca it’s the first day of that rule

22: I agree with Donald. It’s good to lay down a solid foundation for rules. Let the children know we will enforce them.

acepilot: okay but I vote we still let them have their sleepover. It is Boyd’s first sleepover. Excuse me, important life milestones happening here!!

Dadnald: okay fair

Dadnald: It’s been approximately two weeks since we all met Boyd and Della’s already imprinting on him

acepilot: like you’re not

Dadnald: shhhhh

Dadnald: you’re right about the sleepover. I don’t want to take that away, and they all seem so excited.

Dadnald: let me figure out something else though, at least for my kids

Indy_Sabrewing: we’ll do it together

purpleisforthegays: Any adventures between now and the sleepover, Mr. McDuck?

Moneybags: just a small day trip to the Sands of Time on Wednesday. should be an easy one.

Dadnald: I think we should just assign them extra chores until then

22: fine by me.

acepilot: hahah same

Moneybags: Gyro?

worldsgreatestinventor: I don’t think I have that kind of relationship with Boyd yet, to be completely honest.

worldsgreatestinventor: but it’s fine he’s a good kid

acepilot: oh I know

Dadnald: I’m picking up Huey and Boyd from their Junior Woodchuck meeting tomorrow; I can talk to the Drakes then

Moneybags: good thinking Donald!

Moneybags: you’ll get there, Gyro

PM between Junior-Woodchuck74 and TotallyNotGizmoduck

11:47 am

Junior-Woodchuck74: Boyd says you’ve been shopping with him and Dr. Gearloose!!

TotallyNotGizmoduck: yeah!! It was an infallible excuse to get Gyro out of the lab

TotallyNotGizmoduck: He really cares for Boyd.

Junior-Woodchuck74: And Boyd really cares for him!

TotallyNotGizmoduck: I can see that! Boyd is a sweet kid.

TotallyNotGizmoduck: I just wish Gyro would realize that. For a genius, he can be surprisingly dense.

Junior-Woodchuck74: he’s not the only one

TotallyNotGizmoduck: Oh cease whatever scheme you’re planning and help me figure out how to make Gyro overcome his anxieties about parenthood!!

Junior-Woodchuck74: oh I’m down

Junior-Woodchuck74: I’m not dropping this, but I’m down

TotallyNotGizmoduck: I expected nothing less. Now, any brilliant ideas? Come on brain, think!

Junior-Woodchuck74: I think Boyd would be overjoyed to receive parental affection from Gyro. He doesn’t need any meddling; it’s just Gyro

TotallyNotGizmoduck: True

TotallyNotGizmoduck: I believe Gyro’s mostly scared, but he’ll never admit it. Least of all to himself.

TotallyNotGizmoduck: Also, the Drakes are two experienced parents with a stable, large home and income. They have an unending amount of time to spend with their children, and they easily fit society’s heteronormative mold of the perfect nuclear family. 

TotallyNotGizmoduck: they’re everything Gyro is not, and that intimidates him.

Junior-Woodchuck74: The Drakes spent the majority of their parenthood enslaved in their own home and terrified of their son. They’re not exactly the pinnacle of perfect parenthood.

TotallyNotGizmoduck: ha, nice alliteration.

Junior-Woodchuck74: thanks!

TotallyNotGizmoduck: However, I’m not the one you need to convince here. You’re preaching to the choir.

Junior-Woodchuck74: Fair.

Junior-Woodchuck74: Let me ask Webby; she probably has some convoluted scheme to get Dr. Gearloose and Boyd to be a family.

TotallyNotGizmoduck: That makes sense

TotallyNotGizmoduck: I don’t know her very well, but she’s a sweet kid.

Junior-Woodchuck74: she scares you, doesn’t she.

TotallyNotGizmoduck: Oh she totally scares me

Family Group Chat!!!!

2:03 pm

UnoCaballero: @DosCaballero @TrêsCaballero you know what time it is

UnoCaballero: We’re three caballeros

DosCaballero: Three gay caballeros

TrêsCaballero: They say we are birds of a feather!!

UnoCaballero: We’re happy amigos

DosCaballero: No matter where he goes

TrêsCaballero: The one

UnoCaballero: Two

DosCaballero: And three

TrêsCaballero: goes, we’re always together

UnoCaballero: We’re

DosCaballero: Three

TrêsCaballero: Caballeros

ICanDeweyIt: I can’t believe the adults did a songchain before we did

lenaonme: oh shoot we gotta do one now

TheWebbedWonder: what song should we do?

green-sharpie: CREEPER

ICanDeweyIt: aww man

Junior-Woodchuck74: aww man

Junior-Woodchuck74: darn it

lenaonme: so we back in the mine

Violet-Sabrewing: swinging our pickaxe from side to side

green-sharpie: side side to side

lenaonme: This task a grueling one,

ICanDeweyIt: Hope to find some diamonds tonight, night, night

TheWebbedWonder: diamonds tonight

Blathering-Blatherskite: Heads up, you hear a sound,

Junior-Woodchuck74: FENTON

lenaonme: omg another meme child rises

green-sharpie: not exactly a child skdfhdksla

dr. mad scientist: are we done fangirling yet

Junior-Woodchuck74: not all of us are girls, Dr. Gearloose.

Junior-Woodchuck74: That only perpetuates the ingrained societal mindset that liking something is cringey, and girls are cringey and inferior because they’re tied to that negative connotation

lenaonme: go off

TheWebbedWonder: ^^^^

wreathedingold: Well said!!

Junior-Woodchuck74: Dang I think that’s the first thing Aunt Goldie’s ever said to me 😳

wreathedingold: I’m not your aunt kid

TheWebbedWonder: just you wait

wreathedingold: well that’s ominous

wreathedingold: time for me to bounce then

TheWebbedWonder: Noooo Aunt Goldie come back!!!

ICanDeweyIt: Don’t worry Webs, we’ll get her soon enough.

Scrooge-McDuck: Should I be worried or…?

TheWebbedWonder: nah everything’ll be just fine Uncle Scrooge!!

dr. mad scientist: RED NEPHEW.

dr. mad scientist: STOP SPAMMING MY PMS.

dr. mad scientist: one more message and I block you, capishe?

UnoCaballero: You can’t block Huey for emergency purposes

Junior-Woodchuck74: I’m just making sure you get the message Dr. Gearloose

dr. mad scientist: okay okay

dr. mad scientist: it was more of a drag against Fenton anyway

Blathering-Blatherskite: hey!!

TheCrashiestCrash: nooo, we love you fenton!!

Junior-Woodchuck74: yesss Fenton positivity hours!!

Ihaveahead!!!: Fenton positivity hours!!

mutant-krill!!!!: Fenton positivity hours!!

TheCrashiestCrash: Fenton positivity hours!!

TheWebbedWonder: Fenton positivity hours!!

UnoCaballero: Fenton positivity hours!!

moonlander-general: well that’s creepy.

ghostbutler: it’s best not to question their antics.

Tea Time: Oh dear, Duckworth is making logical sense! He’s been replaced by a fake!

ghostbutler: You wish.

ICanDeweyIt: LONG LIVE THE HIVEMIND

lenaonme: Fenton positivity hours!!

DosCaballero: Fenton positivity hours!!

Violet-Sabrewing: Fenton positivity hours!!

Lucky-Gander: Fenton positivity hours!!

purpleisforthegays: Fenton positivity hours!!

adefinitelyrealboy: Fenton positivity hours!!

Lil’ Bulb: Fenton positivity hours!!

Blathering-Blatherskite: <3 <3

dr. mad scientist: betrayed by my own inventions… 

Lil’ Bulb: ily2

dr. mad scientist: which one of you kids taught him that

Junior-Woodchuck74: dewey

lenaonme: dewey

green-sharpie: dewey

ICanDeweyIt: oh shut up

ICanDeweyIt: I’m not sorry

Violet-Sabrewing: as you should be

ICanDeweyIt: and I would’ve gotten away with it if not for you meddling kids!!!

Lucky-Gander: haha

Adventure-Pilot: lol

UnoCaballero: sdfghgfds

lenaonme: dewey getting that Adult Validation

ICanDeweyIt: it do be like that 😌

ICanDeweyIt: anyway back to the song chain!!

ICanDeweyIt: yall adults are welcome to join us just don’t mess it up

Lucky-Gander: wouldn’t dream of it

lenaonme: creeper

ICanDeweyIt: aww man

Junior-Woodchuck74: that’s not where we were in the song

ICanDeweyIt: AWW MAN

Violet-Sabrewing: So we back in the mine

TheWebbedWonder: rocking our pickaxe from side to side

UnoCaballero: side side to side

green-sharpie: This task a grueling one

TheCrashiestCrash: Hoping to find some diamonds tonight

DosCaballero: night night

Blathering-Blatherskite: Diamonds tonight

Violet-Sabrewing: heads up

purpleisforthegays: you hear a sound

lenaonme: turn around and look up

Lil’ Bulb: total shock fills your body

TheWebbedWonder: Oh no it’s you again

Junior-Woodchuck74: I could never forget those eyes, eyes

TrêsCaballero: eyes eyes eyes

ihaveahead!!!: cause baby tonight

ICanDeweyIt: DISCORD

green-sharpie: The creeper's trying to steal all our stuff again,

ICanDeweyIt: IM HOWLING AT THE MOON

lenaonme: SLEEPING IN THE MIDDLE OF A SUMMER AFTERNOON

Junior-Woodchuck74: dewey i hate you

ICanDeweyIt: can’t help it i’m a wild child

Junior-Woodchuck74: last week you cried because the supermarket was all out of blue rock candy

ICanDeweyIt: WILD CHILD, HUBERT

Junior-Woodchuck74: IT’S JUST SUGAR AND FOOD COLORING

ICanDeweyIt: SHUT UP IT’S GOOD

lenaonme: ok shut up nerds hash it out later we’re going back to singing

lenaonme: DISCOOOOORD

green-sharpie: whatever did we do

dr. mad scientist: is this the hecking mlp song

Adventure-Pilot: hah hecking

dr. mad scientist: DONALD EDITS MY TEXTS

UnoCaballero: as i should 

UnoCaballero: don’t swear around my kids

TheCrashiestCrash: TO MAKE YOU TAKE OUR WORLD AWAAAAAAAAY

TheWebbedWonder: Discord, are we your prey alone

TrêsCaballero: or are we just a stepping stone to taking back the throne

Blathering-Blatherskite: Discord

Violet-Sabrewing: We won’t take it anymore

DosCaballero: So take your tyranny away!

purpleisforthegays: discoooooooooord…

Junior-Woodchuck74: discoooooooooord…

green-sharpie: discoooooooooord…

moonlander-general: wha

ICanDeweyIt: shh penny we’re singing

adefinitelyrealboy: this is quite an interesting phenomenon!!

mutant-krill!!!!: agreed, it is quite fascinating!!

green-sharpie: OH SHOOT BOYD DOESN’T KNOW ANY MEME SONGS

lenaonme: 😔😔👊

ICanDeweyIt: YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS

TheWebbedWonder: I’m adding it to the sleepover agenda now!!

Violet-Sabrewing: Della and Penumbra should join us, since they don’t know either

Junior-Woodchuck74: good idea! but what about Uncle Indy and Uncle Scrooge? And Dr. Gearloose?

Blathering-Blatherskite: Gyro knows meme songs he’s just not participating out of spite

dr. mad scientist: shut up fenton

Violet-Sabrewing: there’s no hope for them

wreathedingold: HAH

TheWebbedWonder: oh Aunt Goldie!! I thought you left!!

wreathedingold: shush pink niece

TheWebbedWonder: omg she knows who i am 🥺💚❤️🥰

green-sharpie: uhh not quite webs

Scrooge-McDuck: Excuse me!

Scrooge-McDuck: we had this conversation earlier today. I am a polyglot.

TheCrashiestCrash: And I told you Mr. McDee!! Love who you love!!

Scrooge-McDuck: Oh tatter me tartan.

wreathedingold: quite the enthusiastic brood you have there, Scroogey!

Scrooge-McDuck: I can’t believe this.

Indy_Sabrewing: That’s it Violet; no reading for fun.

Violet-Sabrewing: No!

lenaonme: 😔👊

TheWebbedWonder: Oh no!!!

Junior-Woodchuck74: We should invite Uncle Fethry too, if he can make it

mutant-krill!!!!: my schedule is full of traveling the seas with Mitzy and cataloguing our scientific findings and experiences!!

mutant-krill!!!!: But I will check.

adefinitelyrealboy: I can hardly wait!!

Tea Time: And when is this?

ICanDeweyIt: Well we were planning on showing Boyd at the sleepover, but it seems my dear class has grown… 

ICanDeweyIt: PROFESSOR DEWFORD RISES

Junior-Woodchuck74: @Tea Time Wednesday will work.

Tea Time: Wonderful. I’ll mark it in the family calendar. 

lenaonme: mrs beakley ily

Tea Time: Thank you, Lena.

ICanDeweyIt: P R O F E S S O R   D E W F O R D

green-sharpie: oh boy

Junior-Woodchuck74: you don’t have a Ph.D idiot

ICanDeweyIt: Neither does Fenton but do you see that stopping him?

Blathering-Blatherskite: why must you keep bringing up my lack of a doctorate?

lenaonme: it’s funny

green-sharpie: yeah pretty much

green-sharpie: you know we’re only going to bring it up more now right?

Blathering-Blatherskite: oh blathering blatherskite

Blathering-Blatherskite: What has my life come to? I’m being mercilessly mocked by a bunch of children.

dr. mad scientist: HAH

Tea Time: That’s just what children are like.

lenaonme: mrs beakley says this as if she doesn’t tease everyone mercilessly too

Tea Time: That goes without saying.

Lil’ Bulb: it do be like that 😔👊

dr. mad scientist: OH COME ON

dr. mad scientist: WHICH ONE OF YOU TAUGHT HIM THAT

Lucky-Gander: dude you literally just had this conversation

dr. mad scientist: I’LL KILL YOU KIDS

UnoCaballero: NO

Adventure-Pilot: I’LL KILL YOU FIRST

ihaveahead!!!: i dont doubt that

dr. mad scientist: WHOSE SIDE ARE YOU ON MANNY

ihaveahead!!!: della’s

dr. mad scientist: typical.

lenaonme: nearlythrewhandswitha13yearold.png

Violet-Sabrewing: yes pretty much

TheWebbedWonder: sldkfhdskl;a

Blathering-Blatherskite: oh how the tables have turned

dr. mad scientist: i hate you all

Adventure-Pilot: we love you too mwah <3 <3

dr. mad scientist: ewww

TheWebbedWonder: commence operation: SMOTHER DR. GEARLOOSE IN LOVE AND AFFECTION

Adventure-Pilot: HECK YEAH

Blathering-Blatherskite: Sounds like an interesting scheme with a potentially volatile reaction from the subject, but with likely a desired outcome!!!

TheWebbedWonder: aw thanks Fenton <3

Blathering-Blatherskite: anytime!!

lenaonme: lol get him

dr. mad scientist: I TRUSTED YOU WEBBIGAIL

TheWebbedWonder: THIS IS FOR YOUR OWN GOOD

TheWebbedWonder: TIME TO HEAD OVER TO THE LAB EVERYONE

dr. mad scientist: no

TheCrashiestCrash: I’ll drive!!

dr. mad scientist: NO

dr. mad scientist: FENTON STOP THEM

Blathering-Blatherskite: :3

ICanDeweyIt: S’DLFKDSL;KDKFHSKLASKEISKAGSKASKD

dr. mad scientist: YOU WILL DIE PAINFULLY

TrêsCaballero: This chat is… interesting

ICanDeweyIt: Get used to it Uncle José!!!

TrêsCaballero: I am… Uncle José?

TrêsCaballero: What an honor!!

ICanDeweyIt: sure you are!! you’re close enough to uncle donald

TheWebbedWonder: and we love you!!!

ICanDeweyIt: yeah and that

UnoCaballero: awww kids

TrêsCaballero: you must meet my biological nephews, Zico and Zeca!!

TheWebbedWonder: NEW FRIENDS!!!

Junior-Woodchuck74: Uncle Scrooge

Scrooge-McDuck: Yes Huey?

Junior-Woodchuck74: On an unrelated note, can we take an adventure in Brazil?

TrêsCaballero: 🥰🥰

Scrooge-McDuck: ugh 

Scrooge-McDuck: I’ll look into it

TheWebbedWonder: I’ll help you Uncle Scrooge!!

Indy_Sabrewing: Is this the adventure you promised Della?

TheWebbedWonder: Nope!! My lips are sealed on that one

lenaonme: huh you’re actually doing that

TheWebbedWonder: Yep!! And it’s gonna be amazing!!

Adventure-Pilot: I bet!!

TheWebbedWonder: 💕💕💕

TheWebbedWonder: I love you!!!

Adventure-Pilot: aww I love you too honey!!

DosCaballero: Not to interrupt this adorable declaration of love but

green-sharpie: you’re an uncle too

DosCaballero: !!!!!

UnoCaballero: I’m proud of you guys

purpleisforthegays: are you talking to your friends or to the kids?

UnoCaballero: up for interpretation

PM between Junior-Woodchuck74 and TotallyNotGizmoduck

4:35 pm

TotallyNotGizmoduck: Huey

Junior-Woodchuck74: Yes Fenton?

TotallyNotGizmoduck: I scrolled up in the major group chat and your uncle said something odd about his nickname

Junior-Woodchuck74: Wait, why were you scrolling up in chat?

TotallyNotGizmoduck: Manny and Lil’ Bulb roped me into taking out of context screenshots.

Junior-Woodchuck74: Oh hey Dewey and Lena do that too!!

Junior-Woodchuck74: What did you find?

TotallyNotGizmoduck: screenshot-2020-08-06-4.24-PM

[aw-phooey: mine used to but I changed it when the band broke up. too dangerous to keep it ngl]

TotallyNotGizmoduck: Why would it be too dangerous for him to keep his Three Caballeros nickname?

Junior-Woodchuck74: Yeah that’s definitely weird

Junior-Woodchuck74: Especially since Uncle Donald’s account is private

TotallyNotGizmoduck: this chat service only has basic security. It is easily hacked if someone has the means.

Junior-Woodchuck74: That means they’d have to want to find Uncle Donald

Junior-Woodchuck74: Fenton I’m scared for Uncle Donald now

TotallyNotGizmoduck: I’m sure he’s okay! He knows how to protect himself, if nothing else.

Junior-Woodchuck74: true

TotallyNotGizmoduck: Besides, you have me, a literal superhero, on your side if anything goes wrong!!

TotallyNotGizmoduck: and your family is exceptionally good at fighting off threats. You’ll be okay, Huey.

Junior-Woodchuck74: i’m not worried for me

Junior-Woodchuck74: but thanks, Fenton

Junior-Woodchuck74: i think i’m gonna sleep on this and then do some DuckDuckGo searches on the Three Caballeros tomorrow, okay?

TotallyNotGizmoduck: Of course, Huey

Junior-Woodchuck74: talk tomorrow?

TotallyNotGizmoduck: wouldn’t miss it!!

Junior-Woodchuck74: and you should really change your name

TotallyNotGizmoduck: I will

PM between TheWebbedWonder and TotallyNotGizmoduck

7:43 pm

TheWebbedWonder: Hi Fenton!!

TotallyNotGizmoduck: Hello Webby!!

TheWebbedWonder: I realized I never added your mother to our group chatTheWebbedWonder: Can I have her username?

TotallyNotGizmoduck: Of course! I figured something was up

TotallyNotGizmoduck: Not that you can’t contact me casually!!

TheWebbedWonder: I’ll keep that in mind! 💖

TheWebbedWonder: Your mom is really nice but I don’t know her that well

TotallyNotGizmoduck: Oh you two will definitely get along

TotallyNotGizmoduck: There is a 93% chance of it

TotallyNotGizmoduck: The 7% is if she catches wind of the illegal activities Lena drags you into

TheWebbedWonder: It was ONE time and that guy deserved it!! It was justice!!!

TotallyNotGizmoduck: Webby, you set a citizen’s apartment ablaze!!!

TheWebbedWonder: He was being a jerk

TheWebbedWonder: He purposefully misgendered Dewey and Violet

TheWebbedWonder: and he made some really gross comments about Lena

TotallyNotGizmoduck: Webby, I understand that

TotallyNotGizmoduck: M’ma and I have to deal with our fair share of jerks

TotallyNotGizmoduck: And in all honesty, she would probably respect the karma of your actions. I definitely do.

TheWebbedWonder: yeah I get it

TotallyNotGizmoduck: I became a superhero to help people

TotallyNotGizmoduck: And that person deserved what came to them, but sometimes there are better ways to help people

TheWebbedWonder: sure okay

TheWebbedWonder: I mean you should probably give Lena the lecture

TotallyNotGizmoduck: I’ll keep that in mind

TotallyNotGizmoduck: but you’re a good kid webby

TheWebbedWonder: awww thanks 💖💖

TotallyNotGizmoduck: You and M’ma will get along

TotallyNotGizmoduck: You’re both kind, powerful, passionate women who scare me

TheWebbedWonder: Aww, I scare you? That’s so sweet!!! Thank you!!!

TotallyNotGizmoduck: Uhhh you’re welcome?

TheWebbedWonder: 🥰🥰

let kids be kids

8:03 pm

TheWebbedWonder: Fenton is lecturing me about when we set that guy’s house on fire

lenaonme: hah that was awesome

Lou: ew lectures

Junior-Woodchuck74: I told you that was a bad idea

Violet-Sabrewing: It worked out, though

TheWebbedWonder: he’s so nice but also I want to set all bigots’ houses on fire

ICanDeweyIt: as you should

Violet-Sabrewing: *as WE should

ICanDeweyIt: you’re right vi!!!

lenaonme: *cracks knuckles* aight i got this

TheWebbedWonder: wait no lena don’t be mean

lenaonme: shhh it’s just a little bit of good-natured teasing

TheWebbedWonder: Lena

Junior-Woodchuck74: Lena

Violet-Sabrewing: Lena

adefinitelyrealboy: Don’t be mean to Dr. Crackshell-Cabrera!! He has to deal with a lot of their comments anyway. And he’s a superhero!! He knows what he’s doing!!!

Violet-Sabrewing: Fenton is a superhero?

lenaonme: khdskalksdf HE’S gizmoduck????

Junior-Woodchuck74: oh no

Violet-Sabrewing: I did think of this hypothesis a couple months ago

adefinitelyrealboy: Oh no!! I didn’t mean to reveal Dr. Crackshell-Cabrera’s secret identity!!

ICanDeweyIt: not much of a secret tbh. he has a whole journal entry for people who know he’s Gizmoduck

TheWebbedWonder: Guess he has two more names to add to that list

Lou: to be fair, his username is TotallyNotGizmoduck. That’s pretty sus

Junior-Woodchuck74: he really needs to change that.

ICanDeweyIt: yeah

PM between lenaonme and TotallyNotGizmoduck

8:24 pm

lenaonme: ay yo

TotallyNotGizmoduck: Hi, Lena!

lenaonme: be gay do crime

TotallyNotGizmoduck: Lena no

lenaonme: lena yes

TotallyNotGizmoduck: I suppose Webby talked to you?

lenaonme: yes

lenaonme: also vi and i know your secret identity now

TotallyNotGizmoduck: darn it

lenaonme: seriously change your name that’s kind of pathetic ngl

TotallyNotGizmoduck: I understand you like fitting the image of “rebellious teenager” and all, but are the insults completely necessary?

lenaonme: oh thank webby she convinced me to only lightly tease you

lenaonme: it’s with love~ 💖

TotallyNotGizmoduck: Not quite sure if I buy that

TotallyNotGizmoduck: I don’t want to have to apprehend you if you commit crimes, Lena

TotallyNotGizmoduck: and my M’ma wouldn’t either

lenaonme: i don’t even know her

TotallyNotGizmoduck: You will tomorrow!!

lenaonme: i can’t decide if that’s ominous or just overly preppy

TotallyNotGizmoduck: I’m just a little excited

lenaonme: lmao lame

TotallyNotGizmoduck: :(

TotallyNotGizmoduck: I hate teenagers

lenaonme: blanket statement huh

TotallyNotGizmoduck: sorry

TotallyNotGizmoduck: I wouldn't be forced into negative feelings if you weren't mean to me!

lenaonme: it's because i love you

TotallyNotGizmoduck: you keep saying that, but I'm not so sure I believe it...

Science Gays

8:48 pm

fentonium: why are kids like this

worldsgreatestinventor: agreed, very negative feelings indeed

adefinitelyrealboy: :(

worldsgreatestinventor: except for you Boyd

Junior-Woodchuck74: It’s because we love you

adefinitelyrealboy: what about Huey?

worldsgreatestinventor: ehhhhhhh

Junior-Woodchuck74: disappointed but not surprised

Junior-Woodchuck74: let me guess you talked to Lena?

fentonium: yes

worldsgreatestinvention: she’s cool

worldsgreatestinvention: she taught me memes

worldsgreatestinventor: WHAT

worldsgreatestinventor: red nephew!! your lot told me that was dewey!!

worldsgreatestinvention: just for those specific memes

worldsgreatestinvention: it was a group effort

Headless-Mannyhorse: good for them

worldsgreatestinventor: they will rue the day!!

fentonium: oookaay

fentonium: you know what I prefer Lena to this

Junior-Woodchuck74: she knows

fentonium: oh no

Junior-Woodchuck74: that’s one of the reasons she likes it so much

fentonium:  oh no

Family Group Chat!!!!

4:55 am

lenaonme: b͈̻̙͕̲̭ͦͦ̾͛l͉͒a̱̳̠̳͈͎̖̓ͪc̆͒k͎͖͈͓̎̌͒p̝͈̌ͫͥͦi̩͙͙͕ͫ̋͛ň̦̌k̟͐̾ ̟̼̥͎ͣͫ͛̂i̞͓̰̜͇̜̪ͧ͑͌̓s̙ͤ͛ͩ ̩̞̖͖̺̐̈͋͆́̈́ͅt̙̥̄ͨͭ͐h̩͇̮̙̬̉͂ͫe͕͚̳̩̞͚̜ ̞͕̰̇͛̏̍ͨ̄r͉̹̱̬͑̄̾͐ḛ͖̘̇̆v̺̱̇̽͒o̤̮̤l̞̯̪̳͕̿͆͌ͭͅu̮̼̝̤̅̑ͬ̾͑͂̍t͇̲̺̘̀i̘ͦ̿͗o̪ͣ͐̓̇ͦ̎ͬn͙̱͔̩͙͒́̋̽̎̎~

dr. mad scientist: oh my god shut up

~

Huey: Junior-Woodchuck74 Dewey: ICanDeweyIt Louie: Lou / green-sharpie* Webby: TheWebbedWonder / Ultimate_Scrooge_Fangirl* Donald: aw-phooey* / Dadnald / UnoCaballero Scrooge: Scrooge-McDuck* / Moneybags Della: worldsgreatestadventurer* / Adventure-Pilot / universesgreatestadventurer /acepilot Beakley: 22 / Tea Time Launchpad: TheCrashiestCrash Lena: lenaonme Violet: Violet-Sabrewing Duckworth: ghostbutler Gyro: worldsgreatestinventor* / dr mad scientist / wildlymisunderstood Fenton: TotallyNotGizmoduck* / Blathering-Blatherskite Manny: ihaveahead!!! Lil' Bulb: worldsgreatestinvention* / Lil' Bulb Gladstone: Lucky-Gander Fethry: mutant-krill!!!! Indy: Indy_Sabrewing Ty: purpleisforthegays Goldie: Wine-Aunt* / wreathedingold Penny: moonlander-general Boyd: adefinitelyrealboy Panchito: DosCaballero José: blackmagica* / TrêsCaballero

*main

i listened to a bunch of various blackpink while making this (on if it's your last rn) so that's why that ending moment is there lmao. it's just a glimpse into my life i guess. it's also a fitting reference since i wrote a bunch of this during a writing sprint with friends (and i lost :( ) and they introduced me to almost all of the blackpink songs i know!

there's a moment in which dewey called himself a "wild child" which is inspired by another friend calling me a wild child the other day. it just be like that i guess. (tragically, neither this friend nor the blackpink friends are into ducktales so they won't read this. but moon, silv, viper, rose, if you're out there... ily)

peep some sexuality headcanons!! I tried not to make them too overwhelming since I know a lot of people have different hcs, but they slipped in. It didn't make it in, but I hc that in addition to the no-label thing for genders, Scrooge is also demisexual and demiromantic!! I'm aroace so that means something to me. Also re: the bigot Webby and Fenton were talking about, I hc Violet is trans and Dewey is nb (thank the duckfalls server for that one). and lena is gay. but all headcanons are cool n valid and i'd love to hear some of yours!!

i unexpectedly got a really good response to this fic last week and i just want to say thank you!! it means so much to me that people like this fic and that people like my writing in general. i love all of you <3 i haven't responded to comments from last week yet cause energy but i promise i will i just need energy. but i read all of them and they were so sweet!! so thank you!!

in a similar vein, no penny pokemon plot this week cause the week slipped by and i forgot to message ppl about pokemon but i definitely will do that. it'll probably be back for next time. thank you so much to everyone who offered!! i'll probably take you guys up on that.

also thanks to the people on tumblr who gave me scrooge phrases. @just-sinag sent me an amazing video of all of scrooge's catchphrases from dt87 (which i didn't get to use this time unfortunately but definitely next time) which was really helpful, but everyone who replied to my post is really awesome and i appreciate it!!

in other news, my cat just meowed at the door while i'm writing this author's note and then jumped very cartoonishly when the door bumped against the wall. she's a little freaked out right now, poor baby. but i love her.

Chapter 4

[rosenmarille]

First of all: that One Day bit is quality content. Second of all I read "3.5 for Holly" and am Highly Interested

HI yes! i will explain, however i first have to correct myself. its actually a part 2.5, not 3.5. like i mentioned in the other post, the part is called “heart unbound”, this is about 25 years after battle tendency, when holly is in her early 20s!!

the rest of this im gonna put under the cut

so the setting. joseph (43), suzie, and holly (21) live in new york, smokey is in georgia, lisa lisa (75) is Somewhere in the states, erina and speedwagon have passed away (sad). its 1963! the speedwagon foundation has continued expanding, with joseph and lisa lisa closely involved after speedwagons death. they’ve mostly moved their attention into new territory, but still have all their old research kept. stands aren't a thing yeeet, but its been long enough that the pillarmen have faded into unpleasant memory.

until one night the power at the swf hq goes out for just a moment too long, and santana manages to escape.

joseph and lisa lisa are contacted asap, and they decide to travel down to texas and find him (preferably take him out for good this time). holly, who has grown up hearing about jojo’s wild escapades, really wants to come along. she knows some hamon! she can defend herself! come on!! (yes i said it, holly learned hamon, do you think having lisa lisa for a grandmother would result in anything less?) anyway, joseph and lisa lisa Really don't want her to come since it could be really dangerous and they'd rather not put her in harm’s way.

so holly (rich, unsupervised) books a plane and goes after them.

we skip to texas!! joseph and lisa lisa investigate at hq and the surrounding area and find practically no trace of santana or where he might have gone. when holly arrives, she decides that since she can't look into hq without getting caught, she’ll ask around with locals, and manages to hear rumours about a new sort of cryptid (only appears at night, weird anatomy etc), both cattle and people have been disappearing, but on a very small scale. she looks into similar stories and realizes that santana must be moving south, though what he's planning, she doesn't know. but she will follow!! (and leave breadcrumbs for her family to pick up on this pattern too, she guesses. not so helpless now, huh?)

so this goes for a while, taking her down into mexico, until she is pretty sure that she can triangulate the missing people reports accurately enough to actually Find him. holly isnt stupid, she doesnt think she can win in a battle against a pillarman. what she’s hoping to do is prove herself to joseph and lisa lisa by prepping and helping out enough for them to then take care of the problem. she's an adult now and she doesnt appreciate being treated like a child. (you may say this contradicts how she behaved towards joseph in part 3, but to that i counter: she's in her 40s in that one, and her being an adult is established enough that she knows she can act a lil silli without that being put in question)

but hey!! she does find him!! she decides to stalk him for a bit, see what he does. so she happens to be there when santana attacks a young woman (midnight snack), who pulls a KNIFE instead of running away, so Holly rushes in and deflects an attack with a quick hamon swipe. santana has learned from his previous hamon encounter and instead of sticking around, he decides it isn't worth it and absconds instead (smart). (at this point you might notice this is the first fight of the part. yeah it be like that in this one. call it battle untendency) 

holly and the woman (who later introduces herself as Maria (no last name yet; but named after Maria Maria by Santana (lol)) also get out of dodge and hide out in an alley, where maria decides that she needs to know what the fuck that Thing was, yesterday. magic?? sparkling?? hello??? and hollys like uhh hah yes so. that's an ancient semi immortal vampire creature? and this is sunlight breathing magic, which he's allergic to. yea. and maria is like ................yeah okay i buy it. teach me sunlight breathing magic, i wanna come.

maria side paragraph! she's our oc and we love her. remember that awful scene from the santana arc with all those prisoners and the one kid who doesn't get sacrificed? that's her older brother. he was “let go” but “let go” basically did just mean “free to wander the desert and find civilisation maybe”, so when he did eventually find his way back home, he'd been severely traumatized, plus on death's door. other prisoners had been turned into vampires to test on the pillarman discovery, so the word “vampire” is something he'd have heard and conveyed to his family, who didn’t. really believe him. he also hasn't really recovered from that experience :( then the war happened and maria's dad served in it, and afterwards decided that his other child needed to know how to defend herself, and maria learned how to handle a knife, as well as how to physically fight. their family managed to avoid post war financial problems for the most part, and maria was able to finish her studies! she's a pilot :)  she is, however, harbouring very deep anger and resentment for what happened to her brother, and has not really had a face to direct that anger towards, so it's been on a relatively low burner for the most part, but now there’s talk of vampires and a person she can blame for her family’s trauma.

they exchange notes and she realizes that yeahh, that is pretty much exactly what her brother had told them, so it was true. hah :) yes actually, i would like to learn vampire killing magic please holly. and holly, who didn't really want to bring someone with her, but kind of does believe in accidents not being a thing, decides that yeah, she probably should bring maria along. and sure!! if they have to deal with sanata again, why not teach her hamon!! they share stories and continue to follow the trail while they train together, and become really close friends! jobro time.

we've now reached the first third of the story.

we travel further south!! soon, holly begins to realize......... ohh..... the temple they found santana in.. that's south of here, isn't it? oh huh. what could he want there?? the masks have been destroyed as far as she knows?? she doesn't know enough first hand to know what significance there could be, but the girls prepare for anything. maybe a big weapon the researchers had not been able to identify?? MOre pillarmen, secretly living underneath the temple??? 

(there are gonna be some scenes that involve lisa lisa and joseph figuring out where they need to go, and maybe also realizing who set that trail, maybe they have smth else going on, who knows) 

holly and maria follow santana and eventually do find the temple, and prepare to stake it out, hopefully hopefully not alerting him to their presence, because that would be.........bad. (tho tbh marias kinda itching to try out vampire begone magic. wouldn't You want to if you suddenly learned how?) neither of them have ever been here so they're honestly pretty floored by the temple interior, the tunnel that leads into the main chamber dark and uninviting, with who knows what hidden dangers are lurking about. 

and then they see him. santana is investigating the place where the pillar had been cut out of the structure, the stone masks crushed and broken, strewn around the floor, running his hands over the broken stone. Then he walks to one of the murals carved into the wall, a large one, similar to the one speedwagon had been investigating, with the 4 faces representing the pillarmen, and he lingers there. dips his head, then walks back to the empty space of the pillar and sits down where it was, crosslegged, and closes his eyes. and then he stays still. what does That mean?? 

the girls decide this is enough, they should fall back and formulate a proper plan, maybe wait for joseph and lisa lisa to catch up. buuuut we can't have that be the end of it, and so something happens, maybe one of them trips? steps on rubble that falls loose? they make a noise. and get noticed. 

change of plans! fight now! except there isn't an attack? they stay still but “i know you're there.” damn it. battle formation, stances ready, they make their way into the chamber, where santana hasn't moved at all. he's still sitting there, but he's looking at them now. holly asks what he's doing here, he asks the same back. she says not to play dumb, hes been killing people this whole time, he has to answer for that! and to that, santana honestly looks a bit confused because. has he? in his defense, he's not human, his prey is humans. pillarboy has to eat.

marias like “well? aren't you going to attack us?” and he's like “not unless you bother me.” and closes his eyes again. the girls aren't sure what to make of this.

santana side paragraph: first of all, this is a santana stan account. name one (1) thing he's done wrong, canonically. woke up in a strange place. captured?? got his bearings, tried to Leave and was accosted! shot some nazis (go king), and finally only snapped when joseph got mad he didn't laugh at his clownery. anyone would get murderous as a result. tried to escape further, ultimately was stopped and detained Again! morally, he's above joseph. 

so they're just standing now. since their earlier encounter where holly used hamon, santana refuses to talk more at first, but holly has the bright idea to get his trust by having maria restrain her and then stand back with her weapon -- a show of putting herself in a helpless position and promise she wont attack. that’s enough for santana to agree to come closer and have a proper conversation.

holly asks again why he's here exactly? what's here? and he tells her that if she Must know, he's waiting. waiting for what, she asks. and maria looks back at the carvings and realizes “oh. there should be 4 of them.” now santana looks mildly uncomfortable, and holly rememebers that “oh fuck, dad killed all of them.” and then “wait they were evil tho??” and then again “wait fuuck, didn't the leader guy say they left this one behind in mexico on purpose? oh man does he Know?” holly finds herself in the position of “not only do i have to tell this guy his friends aren't coming because they're Dead, they also kinda abandoned him.” yikes.

meanwhile maria is kinda pissed that her one chance at revenge might have just been taken from her. she still blames santana for what happened to her brother, and she refuses to let that go. she’s too stubborn and proud for that. and now, especally since holly seems to be focused on creating a bond, it feels like a slap in the face. so she kinda… snaps, ruining their chance at resolving this peacefully and causing santana to run off again. she and holly have a fight. it sucks.

soon after that joseph does find holly and he Does send her home. maria, after explaining her intentions, stays with them. holly is heartbroken :( after shes gone, joseph and lisa lisa make a plan to trap santana, aimed to go off in a few days prep, and during this, maria is starting to realize that that... really isnt the right thing to do... shes now had some time to sit alone with her guilt and regret about how she handled the situation, ssso she gets an idea on how to make up for it...

meanwhile holly is sitting at home and is sad, until suzie drives her somewhere in guise of going to a fancy lunch with smokey (whos in town), but really she drives her to the joestars airpad where her friend marua(!!) is already waiting in front of joseph’s plane, which, turns out, she hijacked in the south and flew all the way up here, and suzie tosses holly a bag with clothes and stuff and tells her to hurry up and get going :3

and hollys all "but what about lunch with mr smokey? :o" and suzie winks at her and says "don't worry, he's waiting for me to tell him everything went well at the restaurant ;)" and then holly gives her a big hug, runs to her friend and hugs Her, and they are off to fly back south to save some lives. on the way, maria apologizes and explains -- how she had harboured this resentment for so long that the sudden target for her blame put in front of her, plus the immediate removal of it were so jarring that she acted impulsively... she knows santana isnt at fault for what happened with her brother... and now she just hopes they make it in time.

as luck would have it, they catch up with joseph and lisa lisa just in time to jump between them and santana (maria accidentally cuts off joseph’s prosthetic hand in the process and freaks the fuck out before realizing it’s fine) and try to talk it out. it’s a tense few minutes, but holly is determined and stubborn, and she manages to get her dad and grandma to see her side of things and santana is saved! they find something for him to eat, giving him the energy to heal his wounds. pillarmen absorbing shit never gets old.

And from there it’s mostly just everything getting settled down and smoothed out. they get back in touch with the swf and tell them the problem is handled. santana turns out to be a relatively peaceful dude when his life isn’t being threatened, and he becomes a good friend with all four of them, but especially holly and maria. they help teach him about the modern world and he decides that he’s going to do some travelling and learn about the history of his culture and other ancient mesoamerican cultures he interacted with in his youth, and he shares the things he learns with the swf so they can get the info about where theyre needed etc.  maria gets hooked up with one of the many therapists we decided work at the swf that has experience with the supernatural things she and her brother have gone through. holly, maria, and santana stay in touch and go on regular trips together. holly receives many post cards.

it’s all really good and happy :) thats heart unbound baybee!! <33

[sad-space-monkey-boi]

Here's My Brother And His Head's Screwed Up, But Thats Alright

@lonelyboy-in-space

Tw: for panic attacks, hallucinations and emotional abuse 

Title from Kitchen Sink by Twenty Øne Pilots

Luther could hear his siblings laughing downstairs. They were having a movie night, same as every Friday, but he stayed in his room. He hadn't left his room for a week if you didn't count going to the bathroom. Mom left food by his door like she used to before he went to the moon, but he mostly let the plates pile up in the corner.

Occasionally Allison, Ben or Klaus asked if he wanted to join them, but Luther turned them down every time. Whenever he interacted with his siblings, he always managed to make it awkward. Klaus had joked that it was because of the lack of people on the moon. Maybe he was right. Luther also didn't want to run into Vanya. He couldn't face her. Not after what he did.

He heard a knock on his door. He could hear Allison's voice say, "Hey, we're gonna watch a movie if you want to join us?" He mumbled an excuse and listened mournfully as her heels clicked down the hall. Talking entirely to himself, he said, "I do want to join you." He was shocked when he heard a hauntingly familiar voice say,

"You don't deserve to, Number One,"

Luther spun around to find the voice the voice, coming face-to-face with his Father.

"You- You're not real." Luther had hallucinations before. He knew what they were, looking back. His siblings yelling and screaming at him, blaming him for Five's disappearance, for Ben's death. He thought they had stopped for good. He was wrong.

"But of course I'm real. Where did you get the notion that I wasn't?"

"You're dead."

His father stared at him quizically. "Death is relative, dear boy. But we're talking about you. What makes you think you should be with your siblings while they're enjoying themselves? Wouldn't you just distract them, with your... presence and demeanour?"

"What do you mean?"

"You know exactly what I mean, Number One! You're siblings don't want to see you now that you look like this! And you can't even seem to speak to them properly! Am I right?"

Luther said nothing. Of course Reginald was right, he was always right.

"I said, AM I RIGHT?"

Luther stumbled forward, knocking over the stack of plates and sending porcelain shards and cold food flying accross the floor. He hit the floor, hands landing on the shards. When he let out a cry of pain, his Father spat,

" Look at you, pathetic! You used to be perfect, now look at yourself, you can't even stand properly!"

The blonde felt tears stream down his face as Reginald insulted him. He didn't hear the sound of his siblings running up the stairs and stopping at his door.

"Pathetic. Number Seven can't stand to LOOK at you! Number Two hates you, he's always hated you."

"Shut up."

"Number Three abandoned you, and there is no doubt that Number Six blames you for his death!"

"Shut up, shut up, shut up, shut up."

He didnt hear Diego pick the lock on his door, or his family rush to his side. He was staring at the floor, unable to move.

"You don't deserve them."

"SHUT UP!"

Diego moved in front of him and held Luther's head in his hands. "HEY, THERES NO-ONE THERE! Luther, there's no-one there. It's okay."

Luther locked eyes with his brother. Forcibly pulled back into reality, he suddenly realized that his siblings were hovering around him. He felt Diego lift him up and away from the china shards and lukewarm broccoli and sit him down on his bed.

"Bud, you're hyperventilating. Can you try to breathe?"

He felt his bleeding hand being guided towards someone's chest and felt a heartbeat under his palm.

"Breath along with me, okay? In and out."

He did as he was told, and he calmed despite his racing heart. Luther saw his siblings through his tears, their concerned faces piercing his heart. Dad was still standing in the corner, taunting him with his presence. Klaus moved closer to him and asked who he was talking to. He swallowed the spit that had filled his mouth.

"Dad."

The other six exchanged looks. "Luther, dad is dead."

"He's right there." He replied, pointing to the corner Reginald was standing in. His siblings turned to look at the corner. Allison looked back at him. "Luther, there's nothing there."

Their father spoke up again. "They're lying. They don't believe you."

A sudden look of realisation dawned (haha get it) on Five's face. He knew what years of isolation did to people. "What is he saying?"

Luther looked down at his bleeding hands, saying nothing. Five grabbed his hands and asked again.

"Nothing that I don't already know."

"Meaning?" Five prodded expectantly.

"That you all don't need me. That Vanya's scared of me, that what happened to Ben was my fault, that Diego hates me now more than before! You all deserve so much better than me, you know that right? I JUST KEEP YOU FROM HAVING FUN, IM PATHETIC!"

Luther pulled his hands away from his twin's and pushed himself father back on his bed. He buried his head in his knees and grasped at his arms, burying his fingernails into his sweater. He felt the bed dip as on of his siblings crawled next to him. They hugged him. He lifted his head slightly to see Ben with his solid but slightly transparent arms wrapped around his shoulders.

"Youre not pathetic, and none of us hate you. I sure don't blame you for what happened to me, and I know that Vanya isn't scared of you. And Diego doesn't hate you, no matter what he says."

Klaus sat on his other side and mirrored Ben's position. "Is he still there?" He whispered. Luther checked. "Yeah."

Klaus looked towards the cornor and flipped it off. "YOU HEAR THAT DAD? WE ALL LOVE LUTHER, NO MATTER WHAT YOU SAY!"

Luther giggled quietly as the rest of his family yelled similar sentiments at the corner until Reginald dissapeared. Vanya squeezed between Klaus and Luther and rested her head on the latter's shoulder.

"You know I'm not mad at you right?" She asked him softly. "I forgive you."

He felt waves of emotion wash over him. "Thank you." He said, smiling.

He let his siblings pull him down the stairs to watch The Princess Bride with them. They made him promise to tell them about these sorts of things. At some point before they came downstairs, Klaus stole one of his sweaters and he pulled Five beneath it. Grace brought them snacks and sat in the armchair after bandaging his hands. Allison and Ben were yelling quotes throughout the whole movie and for once, Luther felt right at home.

[i-writeandread-blog]

Halloween (originally a one shot) Chapter 1

This was published as a one shot through @echelonlab but I needed to make an edit to the characters name (as it was originally Cat, and we can’t have that, now can we? Lol) I will change the title once I can come up with something clever. I’m open to suggestions. Anyway, here’s the new updated version. Enjoy!

"Delilah, you have to come.  It's Jared Leto's party. You love him.  Just say yes.  I know it's last minute, but you can't turn down this once in a lifetime opportunity."  Angie pleaded with me.

My friend Angie had just moved to LA and somehow managed to get invited to Jared's Halloween party.  I couldn't figure out if she was just lucky or if somehow she stalked the right people.  She didn't care about Jared or his band, but she knows this is a dream come true for me.

"I can't figure out how you did it, Ang.  Of all the people, you get invited to my absolute favorite humans place.  But as much as I want to come, how could I? Flights are expensive when they're last minute and in case you didn't know, I'm not loaded with cash."  I proffered.

"Delilah, you get on a plane and you come and you meet your idol, I don't want to hear anymore excuses. Do you understand?" She isn't going to let me decline, if I don't show up she'll be mad enough to go months without talking to me. I have no choice. Scared as I am, I am going to LA and I can only hope I can be in the same room with Jared and not fangirl, faint, or make a complete fool of myself.

                                    -~~-

Three days later I found myself exiting LAX airport and into the most welcoming of weather and arms.  LA from what I could tell was going to be amazing at every vantage point.  Except maybe the few sketchy areas we drove past.  I was glad Angie's apartment was nowhere near those places.  My eyes were wide and I felt child-like taking it all in.

Angie had been an extra at the film studios back home and when she decided to take a chance and try for bigger things in LA, everyone, myself included, thought she was nuts.  But in the 5 months since she arrived she had already been cast in a tv pilot.  It was anyone's guess as to if it'd actually be picked up by a network, but she seemed to think it would.

Her apartment was the size of a shoebox, but it was in West Hollywood where she assured me was the "place to be."  We didn't stay there but to sleep, so it wasn't that cramped. The next two days we shopped for my Halloween costume and I finally found pieces that would make the perfect one, much to Angie's dismay.

                                   -~~-

"Today's the day! Are you excited?" Angie bounces on the bed.  "Go away. It's too early!" I begin throwing pillows at her head.  "Not a chance sweetheart, I didn't barter with the devil only to miss out on my favorite girl meeting her celebrity crush. Get. out. of. bed. now!" She is tenacious as ever.

I am nervous and anxious. Time feels like it will stand still, but I know it is just my imagination.

'What will I say to him if given the chance? How will I keep my cool? Will he even notice me?' A million questions and thoughts start running through my head.

"Oh for Heavens sake, get out of your head! Drink your coffee and start getting dressed. It's already 1 in the afternoon, thanks to your laziness. If I didn't know any better I would think you're trying to get out of going." Angie screamed. "I am not! I'm just scared. Look you go get ready and I will do the same." I say even though a part of what she said is right.

I lay out the tights, shorts, and vest of my costume on the couch as Angie showers. As soon as she is done, it's my turn. I work out all the kinks in my neck and let the water massage my tense muscles. I get out and begin the process of making myself into the silliest of characters.

"I don't get your costume.  It's so weird.  I don't think anyone will know what or who you are."  Angie says as she puts on her slutty Little Red Riding Hood outfit.  "Yes, but HE will know. That's all that matters.  Sorry I couldn't be cliché like you!" I joke. I put on my hat to finish the look and we leave.

We still have several hours before the party but she insists we go out already dressed.  We go to eat at a diner and then since we are in Hollywood I request some light sightseeing on Hollywood Blvd.  Some people stop and give me a puzzling look. I smile and offer no explanations. To my right I hear a child say "look mommy it's Robin Hood."  I have to laugh because I can see where they would think that's what I am.

Time rushes by and it's now 8'o clock so we make our way up into the winding streets of Hollywood Hills and to the Wonderland compound.  I get out of the car, blowing out a breath I am holding, grab my props and repeat a mantra in my head, 'I am here. This will change your life, let's do this!'

"Cmon. Let's go have some fun and meet some crazy rich celebrities!"  Angie grabs my arm and pulls. "Wait! I'm not ready!" The words rush out past my lips.

Angie is trying to get me moving by saying, "It's go time, the time is nigh, now or never."

"Do or die." I whisper.

"Huh? Yeah whatever. Let's just go in. If it becomes too much for you, just squeeze my arm and we will leave, okay?" I begin squeezing her arm. "Not now dork! Give it at least 20 minutes."

The music is louder the closer we get to the door, people are arriving in droves, but I don't recognize anyone yet. We walk in and follow everyone else towards what I think is where Jared recently did a private concert for radio winners.

I notice Jared instantly. He's standing in the shadows apparently aware of everyone around him, his eyes darting around, but he's talking with Jamie and Jordan and laughing. I look away feeling a pang of guilt for staring in the first place. I can't help but think he looks gorgeous in his Jon Snow getup.

Almost immediately I find myself separated from Angie. Panic starts to rise up and I try to calm myself with breathing in and out. I don't know anyone here aside from her. I turn toward the entrance we walked in from, then back to the other garage-like door which opens out to the pool. There's people everywhere. I look back to where Jared was, but he's not there anymore.

"Oh no no no." I blurt out. Then directly behind me I hear, "I'm the only Bart Cubbins in this house." It's Jared's unmistakable voice. I gulp.

I turn to find myself face to face with Jared. My breathing hitches in my throat.  He gives me a sly smile and licks his lips.  I'm fairly certain I am going to pass out.  He stands back and gives me a once over look.  "This is perfection! I don't know why I didn't think of this."

I curtsy and almost immediately regret it. "It was the only thing I could think of to wear once I found these hats at a costume shop.  But I could never try to be the real Bart Cubbins." I explain to him. "Oh I don't know about that! Looks pretty spot on to me.  I'm Jared." He offers his hand.

Of course he has to know that I'm aware of who he is, after-all it is his party, but even if there were questions as to whether or not I knew it was his party and in fact him, the mere fact that I am dressed as his favorite Dr. Seuss character should be a good indicator.

"I'm Delilah. It's nice to meet you Jared." I shake his hand.  "Delilah, how did you come to be at my party? I don't recognize you?"  I begin to freak out. 'Am I not meant to be here? I'm gonna kill Angie!' The look of panic must be evident on my face because Jared laughs and says, "don't worry, I'm not kicking you out or anything, just didn't know why I've never had the pleasure of meeting you before."

"Im umm..." My throat is dry and I look around to see where the drinks in people's hands are coming from.  Jared notices.  "How about I get you a drink and we go sit somewhere quieter where we can talk?"  As much as I'd like to take him up on his offer I wouldn't dare dream on acting upon it.  "No, I don't want to take you away from your party and your friends."  He shakes his head, not letting me say no.

He leans in close.  "I'll tell you a secret, half the people here I don't like.  The other half are either friends or employees who won't even miss me if I leave."  I can't believe what he is saying.  Under different circumstances I would miss him if he left the room.  "Come.  I'll give you the grand tour."  He takes my hand and leads me into the house.  I notice several eyes on me as we make our exit.  He really has no idea how wrong he is about being missed.  Or I'm wrong and the people staring are looking for gossip fodder.

We enter the kitchen and he asks if I would like something to eat.  I shake my head no.  I'd throw up instantly from all the bundled up nerves inside of me going crazy.  He hands me a glass and asks what I would like to drink.  I tell him water to which he replies, "you're at a party, live a little." I think about it for a second.  "You don't drink, and you're at a party."  He steps back closing the fridge. "Touché. But I think you need some lubrication, you're too stiff."  He emphasizes the words lubrication and stiff.  It almost makes it sound sexual.  "Okay, I'll have whatever you think I should have, you're the boss."  He quickly makes up a gin and tonic and hands it to me.  I swallow it down quickly.  The corners of his lips curl up.  "I'll have another please, less tonic though."  He makes the 2nd one and then guides me to the next room of the complex.

There are a few people scattered around but as if they know something I don't, they scurry off as soon as we walk into each room.  He points out the living room, some office space, and a bathroom.  Then we go back to the stairs and I follow him up watching his ass the entire time.

"I feel your eyes on me little girl, do you like what you see?"  I blush.  "Yeah, it's quite the view." I reply.  The alcohol has opened up my self confidence, otherwise I'd have never said that aloud.

He turns around quickly and looks me over once again, almost as if he's seeing me for the first time. Or maybe he is undressing me with his eyes. I can't handle it so I keep walking past him.

"Mmm, now I have a nice view." He states matter of fact once I'm in front of him. As soon as we both reach the top of the stairs he pushes me against the wall. He's much stronger than I think anyone gives him credit for. "What's going on inside of your head?" He asks while tilting his head this way and that. "You're quiet now, what happened to the bold little girl from 30 seconds ago?" I giggle. "Oh for fucks sake, it's just a number." But I'm still giggling. He releases me and opens a door to the right of us.

"This is a guest room." I peek in and see a bed and some artwork.  He closes the door and steps across the hallway. "This is my moms room when she comes." He points to a door but doesn't open it. And then he walks a few steps and opens another door and shows me the upstairs guest bathroom. Directly across from the bathroom door is another room and down the hall at the end is one more door. He opens the door next to the guest room and walks in.

"This is my bedroom. Come in, I'll show you the view." I walk in and see his bed made up in white linen. There's a door on one side of his bed leading to a closet which he opens. I see flashes of color everywhere I look and can tell most of it is designer, and almost all is Gucci.

"What's the other door down the hall lead to?" I ask since this appears to be our last stop. "Ohh that's just storage." I let it go because he clearly didn't want me to know what it could be, but I couldn't help but wonder why there was a light on in there. It was hardly visible through the crack in the door, maybe a lamp was on.

"Well, I'm impressed Jared. It's very nice. But why am I getting to see all of this?" I can't help but wonder how I became so lucky.

"You wear a costume to a party I am hosting-that only I would know what you are dressed as, and you didn't think my curiosity would be peaked?"

"I wore this yes because it was your party, but also because I didn't want to be like everyone else. I'm not made for wearing sexy nurse costumes." He starts laughing at my revelation. "Oh Delilah, you are most definitely made for sexy nurse or sexy anything costumes. You don't even realize how sexy you are. Even dressed this ridiculously." He reaches towards my head and takes the hat and wig off. He takes off the cape he is wearing and sits down on the bed.

"Sit down with me. I want to know more about you. Who is Delilah?" He slides back towards the headboard and pats the empty space next to him. I sit down but just on the edge, not sure how comfortable I should get, but he grabs me by the waist and guides me back. "So?"

"Well I lead a fairly boring existence, I don't want to disappoint you. Let's talk about something else." I can tell this wasn't the right answer so I continue, "okay well let's see. I am 32, I started an online store about two years ago selling homemade candles, incense, and soaps. Umm, I have a dog named Sorcia- you know from the movie Willow..." he nods. "I just bought a condo in Myrtle Beach, SC. Nothing special." Then I mumble almost inaudibly, "oh I also have a twin who I killed. Anyways, what about you."

Jared shakes his head and laughs. My face however remains deadpanned. "Wait that last bit... it's true?"

"Yeah, so anyway your turn." I try to change the subject.  I don't even know why I felt comfortable opening up and telling him that.

"Oh no, you don't get off that lightly.  What the fuck do you mean you killed your twin sister?"  He stands up and walks towards the window which overlooks the pool.  "Should I be worried, should I kick you out?"

"No, Jared. I'm not a psychopath, I'm not crazy, I don't even know why I told you."  I stand up and walk towards the door, but somehow even though he was further away he catches me and stops me.  His eyes are glaring at me and daring me to tell him more.  "Okay, I'll tell you the whole story.  You're gonna want to sit for this." He sits back down at the foot of the bed as I begin my story, pacing back and forth.

"Three years ago my twin Penelope was in an accident.  Somehow she survived but she was changed.  Like a switch in her brain had been triggered.  She became depressed and angry.  Then that turned into doing really odd things.  She'd offer people things, like for instance, my aunt had come over and she asked if she wanted ice cream... after she ate it my sister laughed and said she had poisoned it.  Or she'd bring people a book but the pages would be torn out.  Just really weird and vile things.  She just wasn't the same.  After months of doctors not knowing what was wrong and being tormented by her we thought it best to send her away.  Before we could she attacked me."  I show him the scar on my stomach where she had stabbed me.  His eyes go wide.  "She said I would never put her away, never separate us.  She intended I think to kill me and then herself.  I don't know how I overpowered her, but I did.  I got the knife and stabbed her several times.  I couldn't believe what I had done and I was so scared.  I had an anxiety attack and blacked out.  When I woke up there was so much blood.  Her body wasn't there, but when the cops came they said no one would survive that amount of blood loss.  They searched the woods and followed a trail of blood.  It ended at one point or another, but they never found her body.  They figured an animal must have found her and dragged her body away.  They thought maybe a bear.  Oh God, this is the worst thing I have ever done and no one here in LA apart from my friend downstairs knows this.  I'm so sorry Jared.  I'll leave now."  Jared rubs his hands up and down his thighs and shakes his head no.

"No, I don't want you to leave.  You're so brave.  Thanks for telling me.  We all have hidden skeletons in our closets.  You weren't charged with a crime, were you?"

"No, the police said it was in self defense."  I explained.

"You're hardly a murderer, Delilah.  You're a survivor and to me that is the hottest thing about you."  He stands up and closes the distance between us.  He stares into my eyes asking for permission and then crashes his lips on mine.  The room instantly goes from ice cold to boiling.  His hands are wrapped in my hair and he stops only long enough to take a breath, until we hear a noise.

It's coming from the room he said was just storage.  It sounded like something fell, maybe a box.  He laughs nervously and then leans forward to attack my lips again with his, but then there's another noise and it sounds like footsteps.  Annoyed he steps back and says, "hold on, someone from the party must have come upstairs.  Let me go tell them to fuck off and leave, okay?"  I agree and sit down on the bed.

He walks out.  I try to catch my breath.  I bring my fingers up to my lips and smile.  It was everything I'd have ever hoped and imagined.  My thoughts were broken when I heard a scream followed by Jared saying "what the hell is this? Who the hell are you?" And then another scream, a scuffle, and footsteps running towards his bedroom door.  The last thing I hear before the door opens is Jared yelling, "Delilah , run!"

[commandtower-solring-go]

There is a Party in my Mouth and Everyone is Lazav - Jank Bank

You can ponder the question of development hell as much as you like, but when the biggest thing holding a deck back is your willingness to buy a copy of Mirror Gallery you begin to wonder where the line is drawn between reason and excuse. After legit 3 years in the making It’s Like A Party In My Mouth and Everyone’s Lazav has finally been built. As with anything its a work in progress. The deck began focused on a single goofball combo and now is a semi-reasonable tempo/control deck based around playing your opponent’s cards.

THE COMBO

And by combo I mean mad synergy that’s only ever won me a single game. But its flashy and fun. The story began back when I first started playing Magic. It was the Autumn of 2013 and Gatecrash had just been released. I had bought like 4 of the Dimir pre-con decks, and thrown together a 200 card, unsleeved monstrosity of an RUB deck focused around 4 copies of Consuming Aberration and 2 copies of Master of Cruelties. Was it good? No! Did I open a Chromatic Lantern in the boosters that came with it? Absolutely. And me, having only played for 2 months and without a grasp of competitive play, I promptly traded it to one of my teachers for a myriad of jank 50c rares. Which leads us home. Of the rares, I pick up a copy of the 6 mana Enchantment Aura, Infinite Reflections. Its a garbage card which reads:

“Enchant Creature

When Infinite Relfection enters the battlefield attached to a creature, each other nontoken creature you control becomes a copy of that creatures. Nontoken creatures you control enter the battlefield as a copy of enchanted creature.”

Naturally this card became my white whale. What could I possibly do with such an overcosted, corner case card? Well in 2017 the answer came to me in a fever dream. Attach it to Lazav, Dimir Mastermind with Mirror Gallery in play. Since then life hasn’t known peace. The end goal being a board of hostile, hexproof, hooded figures who are chomping at the bit to become any creature who dare touch my opponent’s graveyard.

Honestly, it felt too flavourful to pass up.

It took actual years for me to confront. What held me back was Mirror Gallery, a 5 mana artifact that lets you ignore the Legend Rule. It was a $10+ corner case card to begin with. Then fucking Ixilan happened, made all planeswalkers legendary permanents and the price topped out even more. Anyway, a month ago I bit the bullet and unleashed this thing onto the world. And its not so much I let go, and more like it wriggled out from between my fingers and I’m too afraid to touch it again.

THE DECK

The biggest problem with the deck was the fact that Infinite Reflections would only make nontoken creatures copies. As a result, much of the deck relied heavily on low cost-high value creatures that offered some marginal value. Since we were only ever going to enchant Lazav, our creatures didn’t matter so much. Beyond that a few clone effects rounded out the theme.

The deck list for that can be found here:

https://tappedout.net/mtg-decks/its-like-a-party-in-my-mouth-but-everyones-lazav1/?cb=1557670821

But the deck sucked dick. 

Like, don’t get me wrong, I love jank but I also like winning. And frankly, the jank factor and the winning factor was teetering at around 5 and 2 respectively. So some tuneups were made a vague refocusing came with it.

And by refocusing, i mean turning the jank up to 13 and watched what happened. This deck offers a number of win conditions and a few garbage synergies focusing on the main theme.

The current decklist is here:

https://tappedout.net/mtg-decks/its-a-party-in-my-mouth-and-im-tired-of-this-joke/?cb=1557671968

(fun fact: when i was inputting this deck into TappedOut, I entered Diabolic Tutor 3 times cause I’m an idiot when input both Diabolic Intent and Demonic Tutor as such).

Now you may ask me “Max. Why is this deck full of bad cards?” To which I have no answer.

The fundamental purpose of this deck is to have fun and enjoying the game in the only way I know how. With powerful nothing. 

HOW DO WIN?

The deck just wants to mill. We gotta. How else will Lazav eat?

Without mill, we are nothing. But that’s a weak strat so if you want it also supports self mill/Dread Return/Laboratory Maniac.

And building off of this idea, the deck also supports other cards to enchant with Infinite Reflections. Notable inclusions are:

Consuming Aberration:- Cause fuck you, pet card Thief of Santiy:- To draw more of your opponent’s deck than they do Nighveil Spectre:- See above Fleet Swollower:- If you attack with 7 of these you win no matter how many cards are left in their deck, since it always rounds up. Perplexing Chimera:- “JUDGE!” Wall of Frost:- Wall of Frost

CONCLUSION

This deck is awful but its so much fun to pilot. To such a degree, writing this gave me whiplash. I managed to lose a game where all of my creatures were copies of Platinum Angel. Another, when they were Teysa, Envoy of Ghosts. The only game I’ve won was when I had 6 Elesh Norns in play. The deck wins spectacularly and loses spectacularly and its the kind of deck you need to play to realise. Its a long time in the making and reflects everything I want out of this game.

Please consider donating to my Ko-Fi. There is an auction going on on a local facebook page for 76 random mythics and my landlord said that if i don’t win this they won’t fix my window. So please consider donating to award me mythics and toasty toes

https://ko-fi.com/thectower

[girlbossk]

whatre some of ur random headcanons for luke, leia, and han?

hm ok so im. not great with headcanons but it’s fun so here we go!! these… do not all fit into star wars actual universe but thats ok 

luke: 

after the i am your father moment he managed to get the comm number for the executor 

“excuse me, is darth vader’s refrigerator running? yes? well tell him he should go catch it!” 

“yes, i’m holding for lord vader. me? i’m his long-lost [insert type of family member here]!” 

“beep boop beep bop boooooop WHEEEEAAAAoooOOOOOOOOoOOOOOOO” 

luke on hoth turning into an ice cube slowly bc he is from tatooine and it’s REALLY FREAKING COLD 

he always gets first pick of the blankets unofficially bc Leia Said So

he wears like three ponchos at once and accidentally starts a new trend

lots of cuddles. cuddles with leia. cuddles with han and chewie. cuddles with the rogues. cuddles with general rieekan, once. cuddles with the tauntauns. cuddles with threepio and artoo but only for 30 seconds bc metal is cold 

he practices his levitation skills on food which is actually canon but consider: 

he tries to levitate a bowl of soup but accidentally just levitates the soup then drops it onto his lap bc he was surprised

getting the hang of it and messing with people by making their food fall off their forks or out of their mouth

“luke stop playing with your food” “sorry leia!” 

leia: 

she is believed to be the reasonable one of the main trio by everyone who does not know them. everyone who DOES know them knows that this is technically true but also she is always up for an adventure no matter how stupid it is 

“leia come on we’re going to break into the kitchen and reprogram all the caf machines to make hot chocolate instead!” “why stop there? soup” 

sneaking onto the falcon at midnight to play various games with han and luke and various other people 

using her clearance to “borrow” alliance x-wings and go racing with evaan and luke and han and the rogues. (she comes in third, after evaan (1st) and wedge (2nd) but she tied with luke). this was at 2 am. mon mothma was mad. 

on hoth, she has a tiny snowman in her room bc i said so 

she is good pilot!!! she flew a tie fighter in the comic hope dies and she didn’t die so yeah 

stress braiding (like amy in that one episode of b99) 

han: 

dramatically stands on tables in the rebel cafeteria

“I HAVE AN ANNOUNCEMENT TO MAKE” 

luke sighs. “here we go again.” 

“I AM ANNOUNCING THAT AFTER TODAY I WILL PAY JABBA BACK AND HAVE ENOUGH MONEY TO LEAVE THE ALLIANCE SO YOU’RE ON YOUR OWN” 

chewie laughs at him

he does this once a week

and always gives the money back to the alliance 

or ‘loses’ it in sabacc games with various alliance officers 

keeps disappearing at night and doesn’t let anyone on the falcon for a week. turns out he spent entire nights watching “how to braid hair good” videos on the holonet and practicing on chewie. leia lets him braid her hair once bc he’s really excited. it’s not terrible! 

keeps coming up with crazy schemes to make money to pay back jabba 

“WOOKIEE HUGS 100 CREDITS PER HUG COME GET YOUR WOOKIEE HUGS” 

“hey chewie go over there and scare that bank droid into giving us money” 

“what if i played sabacc. and won a planet. and then gave it to jabba so he would marry me—wait no wrong book” 

(yes that is a courtship reference) 

(i’ll stop now)

probably has tried to sneak past people by wearing a baseball cap and sunglasses and it almost worked but chewie did it too and wookiees dont usually wear baseball caps OR sunglasses so 

[thankyoumskobayashi]

TGCF Snakes On a Plane AU starring Ban Yue as an orphan with a collection of 3,000 snakes which she brings with her on a journey to an orphanage. General Ke Mo is the long-suffering pilot, Pei Ming is that asshole who hits on women, Pei Su is his biologist son who is embarrassed by his very existence. Eventually Pei Su helps Ban Yue in collecting all her precious snakes and putting them back in their containers. 

Xie Lian feels his bad luck caused the snakes to break loose, but San Lang (who gave him his window seat and spent the whole flight flirting with him) insists the problem is the quality of the duct tape instead. Bc there was duct tape used on the boxes.... not the smartest idea but how else is an orphan going to load 3,000 snakes on a plane????

By the end of this experience, Xie Lian's Dad Instincts have been activated, Pei Su is ready to become Ban Yue's older brother, and Ke Mo (who has a secret fear of snakes) just wants to retire so he can leave this plane forever. By the end of it, Hua Cheng has bought several things online that Xie Lian mentioned he had to do without, and even put his info in Xie Lian's phone.

Ling Wen fixed the plane in midair because she used to be a mechanic, and since knowing practical stuff like engines helps her fix the plane she saves them enough to let Ke Mo land the plane. I feel like she wouldn't panic even if snakes are falling on her, so she probably fixed the engine wearing at least 3 snakes as a scarf. Any more snakes and she'd probably put them on the nearest item so she can move around.

Also by the end of it Ling Wen wants to keep her scarf snakes bc she likes having the company. Xie Lian wants to adopt one too, but only a snake that's going to grow up small. Hua Cheng immediately orders luxury snake cages, immediately trying to curry favor with him.

Jun Wu is an old grandpa and he offers to take some of the snakes until Ban Yue finds a home. He's only ever had dogs but he'll be damned if he can't learn.

At the start of the airplane ride, Feng Xin and Mu Qing fought for the window seat in front of Xie Lian, eventually Mu Qing won. Behind them Hua Cheng smiled and pointedly offered Xie Lian his window seat. He slipped his arm around Xie Lian's shoulders and the two bickering before only turned their heads around to glare at this rando for daring to make a move on their friend.

Hua Cheng was some rich kid who was saved from a concussion when a ball from a baseball game went flying towards him at high speeds. Little Xie Lian, who was also sitting nearby and had brought a glove, reached over and caught it. He gave it to Hua Cheng with a sigh, telling him to be careful from then on. Hua Cheng had asked his name, and Xie Lian had unwittingly told him. From then on, Hua Cheng tried to unsuccessfully gain Xie Lian's attention.

They had both gotten into the same college. Hua Cheng despaired in his first year, however, groaning hopelessly among the stacks. Xie Lian, who was scribbling a paper nearby, reached over and handed the last of his snacks to this random depressed person among the bookshelves. He was obviously hungry- his stomach confirmed that- yet he gave away the last of his food with some encouraging words and returned to writing.

He didn't know how many times Hua Cheng stopped by his dorm room, awed, reverent, yet kept away by the glares of Xie Lian's roommates. They knew their friend was gay, and they knew assholes would want to date him, so they did their best to keep him from meeting Hua Cheng.

Even the handwritten note thanking Xie Lian for saving him didn't seem adequate. Hua Cheng tore it up and flopped dramatically on his bed. He'd seen Xie Lian that morning and that was enough to inspire him to keep going.

When college was over, he went back to whatever his parents wanted him to do, but it wasn't enough. He kept checking on what Xie Lian would be doing, until finally he overheard Xie Lian excitedly telling Feng Xin and Mu Qing about the trip they were going to take. So Hua Cheng could only book a ticket on the same plane trip.

Mu Qing had the nerve to snark at Hua Cheng. "Break our best friend's heart, playboy, and we'll break your face."

"Believe me, you'd have to bring me back to life to kill me a fourth time if that ever happened," Hua Cheng just laughed.

"San Lang, you're so funny," Xie Lian murmured. "How would they find your soul the 2nd time, let alone the 4th??"

"I'd die several times over before breaking your heart Gege." Hua Cheng tossed him a red stress ball with silver butterflies on it making a pattern like the stitches on a baseball. Xie Lian caught it, tracing his fingers over that unique pattern.

"Here, keep this. It's my promise to you." He stretched, yawning, curling his hand around Xie Lian's shoulder, making him go red and shift awkwardly in surprise.

Throughout the whole plane ride, Xie Lian's getting hit on by this guy who he assumes is an Airplane Rando, but Hua Cheng is talking to him like they're already close. Maybe he's just a really forward person??

Behind them is this little kid who looks scared and uncertain. She is holding her favorite pet snake and looks terrified.

Xie Lian immediately lends her a dog-eared copy of his favorite book to cheer her up. He gives out crayons, coloring books, pencils- you name it. Ban Yue is having a grand old time, coloring flowers in while she tells Xie Lian about how she's bringing all her snakes with her. By this time the snakes are escaping their boxes, but haven't reached the cabin yet.

Ban Yue loves snakes because they're chill, great listeners, and she has someone to protect. Xie Lian tells her that's wonderful, and if her favorite snake is her only one.

By this point, the snakes have found the cabin's ventilation shaft. They are free from their cardboard prison and spread out to explore this large metal box.

Pilot Ke Mo hits some turbulence. Passenger Ling Wen, who was just flipping through engine forums, slams her laptop shut as she hears something go wrong with the plane. She makes her way to the attendant and whispers a plan as the plane's nose dips unsteadily.

Xie Lian buries his face in his hands. "I knew I shouldn't have gone on this trip! Now our plane is going to crash."

"Gege won't crash, I'll protect you with my body so you'll never hit the floor," Hua Cheng draws him to his chest and murmurs comfortingly.

"Shameless!"

"Too shameless!"

"Don't listen to them, Gege. They are jealous of our love~"

Xie Lian resists the urge to ask how he can fall in love with someone he doesn't even know, when he turns around and sees Ban Yue squinting at the vents.

She holds not just her favorite snake, but two now.

"That's funny, I could have sworn I only brought this one with me. How on earth could the others..."

Screams of anger and shouts of alarm echo throughout the plane. The flight attendant had let mechanic Ling Wen have a look at the airplane, and was then notifying pilot Ke Mo of the situation. Ke Mo agreed to make gentle spirals to slow their descent and give Ling Wen time to fix things. However, he wouldn't have anticipated a snake dropping into his lap so that he'd scream and lurch the whole plane forwards!!!

Screams echo throughout the cabin; other passengers must be feeling similarly.

Xie Lian takes all his luggage out of his bag and gives it to Ban Yue for collecting her snakes in. He then picks up the snake around his neck and drops it in there. Hua Cheng immediately offers to put Xie Lian's stuff in with his own stuff. Xie Lian is grateful.

Xie Lian and Ban Yue go down the aisle collecting snakes and apologizing to the over passengers. Jun Wu is deadpan handing over his snake and asks if he can keep it.

Ban Yue is shocked but shakes her head. These are her snakes, and she knows how to take care of them thank you very much.

They continue in this way until Xie Lian is bitten by a snake. Hua Cheng runs up immediately because he "wants to suck out the venom" but Xie Lian stops him by asking what's the point of Hua Cheng also ingesting it too.

"The point is that if anything happens to you, I won't forgive myself!"

Pei Su who has been calmly reading the newspaper this whole time, clears his throat. "Actually, it doesn't have the proper markings. This snake is not venomous."

Ban Yue's eyes lit up. A fellow snake expert?

Soon Pei Su is explaining to whoever is nearby what kind of snake has just landed on them. He joins the crew going down the aisle stuffing snakes into Xie Lian's bag. Eventually, they run out of bag and Ban Yue thinks to check the duct tape on her packaging... d*mn, did the duct tape get loose again?!? She'd have to check and see. A bad feeling for that mechanic arose within her.

Meanwhile in the cockpit, Ke Mo is hollering mad and shaking with fright. "I have HAD IT up to Here with these MOTHER F*CKING SNAKES on this MOTHER F*CKING PLANE!!!" as more and more of the snakes drop from the vents. He has truly tried to stop the plane from landing right away but his stress is mounting.

Meanwhile Ling Wen is fixing the plane while covered in snakes and completely unfazed abt it. She wipes sweat off her brow and pets the snakes hanging off her arms. A look of concentration crosses her face as she adjusts some more things. "Almost there..."

THANKS FOR READING SO FAR BUT IM REALLY FUCKING TIRED. I GOT OUT ALL MY IMPORTANT PLANNING THOUGHTS SO I MIGHT ORGANIZE THIS INTO A PROPER FIC IN THE FUTURE. STAY TUNED

[applecherry108]

first of all hooooooooolyyyy shiitttt

FUCK tungle. it took like 30 tries to log in on desktop. admittedly, i was using the wrong password at first, BUT, even when i remembered the right one it kept giving me shit. This is what i get for being L337 i guess... -_-

anyways, im only on desktop so i can add a readmore to say:

i just,,,,,hate voltron. okay? It sucked. it fucking sucked. i watched the first season and it was like, okay yeah, this has potential. and then s2 was like, okay yeah not as good but maybe s3 will pick up...

s3 didn’t pick up. it was just one long death spiral by the same idiots who fucked up the atla sequel. i hate their writing, i hate their story plots, i hate how they butcher any good ideas they have, and i especially hate their inability to have good character AND plot development happen at the same time.

I got swept up in storm of klance and that’s about it. i have soft spots for other ships but at the end of the day i don’t care. i just don.t fucking,,, care???

the fandom is a mess, the crew was a mess, everything was a fucking mess from the get go.

Like who tf is this show written for?? it has to be for like, 8-10 year olds. It has to be. Everything is just so....stupid. Nothing is ever properly explained, motivations never really given, everyone is just a 2 dimensional cardboard cutout of a trope. And that pisses me off so much bc like??? other shows aimed at young kids can still have great world building. they can have good world building and characters and overall story and still be cheesy and a lil dumb. cheesy and a lil dumb is completely fine!! but voltron is just so...godammn... BORING!! it’s like i WANT to like the characters but its just so goddamn hard when everybody is so fucking flat. by all rights, i should want to marry allura. shes everything i loved when i was little, from her color pallet to her princesshood to her white fucking hair!! i should LOVE allura but i don’t!! i kind of hate her. why?? i don’t know!! shes so...boring! and flat! and fucking PASSIVE! everything in this show lands so fucking flat holy shit.

pidge at matts “grave”? yikes, that was second hand hard to watch for like.... “oooh this is so serious!” but the buildup wasnt there...it was kind of funny tbh... and HELLA awkward...

don’t get me started on lance and hunk. bolin was my favorite look character for the first few episodes and then he got knocked to Comic Relief and had maybe two (2) importantish moments. he/they may be part of the main cast but they’re not main characters. they feel like background props to the Actual Main characters.

which brings me to keith.

FUCK keith.

that’s my reaction after every! new! season!! is just,, FUCK keith. god the show functioned SO WELL without him. he’s just so...idk. i also don’t care. what was his character arc anyway? it SHOULD have been about learning to love and trust others but we only get that in lip service and speed run character development (i hate the quantum abyss...so much... like yeah, who cares about SHOWING our characters mature, let’s just tell that it happened in afucking montage.) if keith were a properly developed character he shouldve remained PASSIONATE and idk, run support?? that boy SHOULD have piloted red, end of story. period. keith doesn’t need to lead he needs to learn to TRUST others and that insludes trusting other WITH HIS LIFE. i won’t rant about how we should have had black paladin lance, but keith should have never ever been black paladin. even after he “matures” he still sucks at. he’s this awful,,little,, Shiro 2.0. and I hate it. i ahte it and i hate shiro just a little bit. even though he was arguably the most likeable character, he shouldve stayed dead. or missing. or whatever. he didn’t need to come back and they didnt need to make keith a little offbrand clone of him. i ESPECIALLY hate that they aged keith up 2 years for no goddamn reason other than to make him the Adult (tm). keith’s dedication to others was gre4at, but it should have, and im failing for this word here so forgive me, climaxed? cresscendo’d? whatever. /resulted/ in him playing support. not leader. lone wolf keith doesn’t need how to lead his pack, he needed to learn to HELP his pack. to be a TEAM PLAYER. he didn’t want the responsibility of leading bc guess what?? some people hate leading!! there’s nothing wrong with wanting to be support! keith’s entire arc is a huge mess of missed opportunities and a grand illustration that he is lm’s and jds’ favorite, just like fucking mako.

i won’t rant about mako, but just know i fucking hate him and the special treatment he gets, and good LORD does keith take over mako. keith isn’t space zuko he’s space mako and it fucking SHOWS.

okay, i’m losing steam here, but like.... so apple, why tf where u voltron 24/7 if you hated it so much? because homestuck was over and i needed a new hyperfixation. and i really had to force it for vld tbh. and at the end of the day, it wasn’t so much about the show itself as the potential of klance (or sheith, up until s3). between the interviews, the coding, the fucking EVERYTHING--it really felt like it could be canon. i knew in my heart it was queer baiting but i had HOPE dammit. hope that this could be killer representation, hope that these characters would delvelopment into something incredible. again, there was so much POTENTIAL. and all of it was wasted. everything really came to a head during the fucking game show episode. it was like lm and lds giving everyone who likes lance the middle finger, really driving home that “no no, he IS just stupid. he’s the comic releif. there’s nothing deeper about him and no one will stand up for him bc they all think of him as such.” and that just....broke my heart. we were so...SO close to lance actually mattering but nope! bolin’d again! and what was his purpose in s8? why to be an accessory to allura of course!

i’ve seen a lot of people really divorce themselves from canon and live solely for fanon, esp fanon klance but like.... i can’t. i just can’t. it’s so fucking hard to work with these cardboard characters. you can only draw so much depth onto them, you know? until the very last moments they had potential, but then it all got snuffed out. but who cares about canon? why bother with it? because! we don’t have a solid consistent fanon version of them! no one sat down and delivered the ten commandments of “here’s what we agree k and l are actually like” it’s stupid and it sucks because everyone has their own little differences and its so so tiring to basically be interacting with minutely different ocs all the goddamn time. canon matters bc it gives everyone the same base to work with. like a cooking showing with the same basket ingredients, but now it’s like.... ya’ll don’t wanna use the mandatory ingredients (and why would you? those canon ingredients are like, a century egg and spoiled sardines, they’re awful.)

okay, and im at work and just came back to this and dont remember my train of thought so like... what really threw all this into sharp clarity was the recent steven universe episodes. they were so...GOOD. so fucking good. so much plot and foreshadowing coming to a head. it was such a wonderfully satisfying payoff that it made me remember what a GOOD show is like, how vld is so very very /bad/. the difference is fucking striking. where one is an intricately woven tale with excellent character development and clear story AND character arcs, that can progress AT THE SAME TIME, one is a hacked together flaming dumpster firing that constantly falls flat and doesn’t know where its going or why. and it s so BORING! like fight scenes can be amazing! they can be well coreographed and tense! and we as the audience can be anxious about the outcome! and vld just wasn’t that! it was boring repetetive action in the least exciting way. and where su set up a lot of potential, holy shit they DELIVERED on that potential. not just for rep, but for characters! for story! for plain ol simple character interactions! and then, again, two dimensional cardboard cutouts.

and now with this difference in good vs bad show so very clearly highlighted for me, i just.... i can’t, anymore, with vld. it sucks. it sucked and i can’t pretend or force a fixation with it that just isn’t there, and truthfully, probably never was. maybe that’s why i’ve been struggling to finish my fic, struggling ever since i posted the last chapter, ever since s7, which, again, that game show was really the nail in the coffin as far as holding onto any hope that this tire fire would ever pick up. like a physically feel ill trying to finishing this stupid fic bc i don’t care so hard. i don’t care and i just... really want to be over it. im sick of seeing it everywhere, im sick of the drama, of the Discourse. like all fandoms have their issues, but hold fuck does vld fandom have a massive Purity problem. like, god, let people ship whatever. who cares. die mad about it.

like homestuck, idk if i’ll ever fully ween myself off vld but i want to move on. i want to enjoy Other Things without having this lackluster weight on my shoulders. and more than anything, i want to stop feeling like im obligated to like the same shit as i did two years ago, or last year, or hell, last week! feel free to unfollow, but yeah i just.... really needed to let this out in a proper post and not in the misc tags somewhere.

[futurepurplepaladin]

When I’m With You I’m Home- Part 1

Anonymous: 11+15+73+81 for lance reuniting with an s/o he left on earth

11) “Wow, you look… amazing.”

15) ““When I’m with you, I’m home.”

73) ““Please don’t say goodbye.”

81) “Come with me.”

Word Count: ALOT

Who: Lance x Reader

Warnings: Nope clean fluff- one cuss word (H E Double Hockey Sticks)

Hope you enjoy!!!

—————-

“Bye, Auntie!”

“Bye, y/n, be back before sundown- I dont want you out in the dark!”

“Alrightie- byeeee!”

You closed the door of the small house you and your aunt shared, then closing the gate in front. FOr some reason that gate never closed right, leaving a loud bang of metal behind you.

You walked quickly off your steps, reaching for your surfboard as you sprint down to the ocean.

--------

Your house was very close to the ocean, a 5 minute walk at the most. Today was one of those blissful days; no tourists, no surfer guys trying to grab your attention- complete and utter calm.

You sat on the warm sand, relishing the feeling of scrunching your toes in the softness. You were wearing a “Coca Cola” crop top, which you took off for the long day ahead. You wore your traiditonal bathing suit, a white halter top bikini set. You tied your hair up into a quick bun (which you knew would come out during a wipe out), strapped the board to your ankle, and rain for the waves.

--------

Surfing took your mind off everything. Off the “accident.” The sorrow your town still felt, even though it had happened a year and a half ago. You still saw the McClains’ to this day, and seeing their smiles etched still with pain hurt you more than the fact everyone “pretended” Lance was alive even though they secretly gossiped that he was dead. It reminded you that you were just like them: still hurting.

Lance and you had been friends since childhood, running with sticks, pretending they were lightsabers and running after lizards. You guys were inspereable. He was the one who taught you how to surf. You were the one who introduced him to space. The whole neighborhood used to tease you two when you were young calling LAnce your “Little Lover” and you his “Little Miss.” You both pretended you hated it, looking at each other in disgust. You usual reaction was to give him a dirty look and say “HIm?” UGHHHHHH!”, and to make a barfing noise. LAnce’s usual thing was puff out his chest and say, “Me and her? Nuh uh, Im a bachelor- I got to many ladies to pick through!”

Forever it was like that- pretending to only be friends, until the day you two began to grow up, seeing not their chilldhood friend but a crush.

Both you and Lance enrolled into the Garrison, and you both got in. You waited to open up your GArrison letters together, and you to met at the beach, ripping up your letters feverishly. You pulled out the acceptance letters and you both screamed in glee. Lance had grabbed your hand, making you dance in the wet sand as waves lapped at your feet, him still screaming and you laughing out of glee.

Then came the “Congratulation” parties, then the Going Away parties, then off to the Garrison you went.

You had excpected to be in Lance’s team (being the engineer), but you didnt. You two were upset- but quickly got over it saying- “Its for the best. We gotta part ways some days Feo.” You used his nickname on him, and he laughed nervously. But Lance began to drift away, and as hard as you tried to keep him with you- you couldnt. His new friends, and his rivalry with Keith was keeping him to busy to be with you, and you began to not love LAnce but despise him. He kept running off, getting people in trouble, and he wasnt being the same. HUnk and Pidge were nice, you had classes with them, so they weren’t the issue.

You confronted LAnce one night, the very night he disappeared. Your bottled up emotions exploded when he told you he was sneaking off outside the GArrison.

“So, your just going to leave?! Because Lance does what he wants, when he wants to, huh?” you yelled glaring at him.

“I dont need you to tell me what I cant or cant do! You dont control me!”

“You’re being an idiot, Lance!”

“Your just jealous Im doing better than you! You don't want to see me do well and have fun- you didnt help me when Keith was being a jerk, because you know Im more talented, more social, and more fun than you are! You barely have friends, while everyone knows my name!”

“First of all-” you know what, forget it you wouldnt understand!” you felt tears pickling your eyes. “Just go.”

Lance knew you like the back of his hand- he knows when he over stepped it.

“Wait- y/n, Im sorry, i didnt really-”

“JUST GO!” you looked up at him, letting you tears run freely, and you walked to your room, and slammed the door, sliding down against it, and broke down.

---------

You replayed this moment for the millionth time as you sat on your surfboard, where the waves were calm.

You felt guilty for that night, feeling it was your fault for pushing LAnce away. You saw LAnce’s rivalry with Keith as stupid, knowing Keith was a better pilot, but didnt want to hurt your friend’s feelings by telling him that. He started to get mad and wanted somebody to listen after you would change the subject quickly when he brought it up, so he started talking to Hunk, who was to nice NOT to listen. You had no friends (besides maybe Pidge and HUnk) because you were so busy trying to get back LAnce, even though he kept brushing you off. You felt you had lost your best friend, and maybe it could have been something more. It wasnt your fault, you knew that, but- you wished you had done something different. Didnt deal with him like that.

The waves calmed you. Bittersweet moments like this came back to you, and little moments with LAnce you treasured. The times you would trip on cracks in the road when you were little, and he was the one that bandaged your cuts. The time your were Leia and he was Han for Halloween. The time he surprised you with a birthday cake for your birthday, but had forgotten to add sugar, and in an attempt to cover up the very flat cake had put globs of icing as big as ice cream scoops all over. You smiled at this one, remembering how the taste was so terrible that you spit the cake out in his face, and he was running around grossed out of his mind with half eaten cake all over his front while you sat laughing so hard your stomach hurt for hours after the incident.

You felt a tear roll off your cheek. You wiped it away. Remembering hurt, but forgetting would hurt worse.

--------

The sun began to set, and you realized you had to go home.

You sighed, because everything was perfect- the sand was cast in a golden honey glow as the sun began to lay upon the horizon. The water was being colored not blue, but soft shades of baby pink, fiery red, and hibiscus orange. The air was cool, and the smell of sea salt filled your noise.

The day had been a long one. You did have some wipe outs, which made your your hair turn into loose ringlets from the sea salt. You brushed your hair to the side, and began to pick up your things until-

A faint sound of a purr came over you, something was flying-you gasped, seeing a blue robotic lion fly past your head and to the far side of the beach.

You gasped. It couldn’t be-

You began to fast walk cautiously to the giant cat. Was it really him? How the hell is he here? Where has he been? Is it really him?

You saw the lion, far off, beginning to crouch. It opened its large mouth, and you saw a man clawed in blue armor step out-he was paler than before, his hair was longer, but it had to be-

“LANCE!” you screamed, realizing who was in front of you. You broke into a run, trying to catch your footing on the sand. You saw him turn to face you, and you were close enough know to see his face break into a huge smile.

“Y/N!!!” He screamed back, breaking into a run just like yours.

You grabbed each other, and held on tight. Loads of questions began to fill your mouth, and all Lance could do was repeat, “I’ve missed you, I’ve missed you guys so much!” Into your hair.

“Lance where have you been, everyone’s been worried sick, I’ve missed you, I thought you were dead, what happened, God I wanted to say sorry to you for so long- Ive MISSED YOU!” You wanted to cry- the thing you wanted most was back in your life: Lance was back.

He spun you in the air, like he did so many years ago on the day you were accepted into the Garrison. You both laughed, and you stayed there, him holding your waist, and you having your hands wrapped around his neck.

“I’ve missed you a lot Lance…” you smiled softly, putting your forehead on his. The butterflies came back, tickling your stomach gently.

“I’ve missed you a lot too y/n- I’ve always wanted to tell you something and I was always too scared to- but I realized life’s too quick to keep stuff to yourself.”

You were hanging on to his every word, anticipating what he’d say. He looked nervous, almost embarrassed to say what he was trying to tell you, and that made the butterflies fly around in your stomach more fiercely than before.

“I like you y/n, like a lot, and I know you probably-“

In a spurt of courage and happiness, you grabbed his face and kissed him.

Sparks flew- he tasted like cherries, you tasted like salt water.

You pulled apart, realizing your feet were back in the sand again- “Wow”, LAnce said breathlessly.

You chuckled softly, watching his light blue eyes turn indigo in the Cuban sunset.

Realization hit him, noticing you were only in your bathing suit.

“Wow, you look amazing,” he didn’t say this in his flirty voice, he didn’t mean it like that- it shocked you to hear he was genuinely complimenting you (for once).

And you did. You found surfing was your outlet to deal with Lance’s dissapaperance. But it wasn’t always like this though. For a long time, the grief of Lance cost you to kind of give up. The Garrison brought back to many painful memories, so you left. When you got back home, that brought me memories to; you stayed in your room, you didn’t come out for meals- it was like you disappeared too. But in an attempt to bring you back, your Aunt lovingly locked you out of the house and told you not to come back until you did something OUTSIDE of your room. You sat on the ground for a while, confused on what to do: it had been awhile since you had been outside. You opened your garage, and saw Lances blue and white surfboard- he had left it at your house before leaving- you grabbed it, feeling a surge of new found energy. You grabbed it and ran to the ocean.

You got addicted- your aunt almost called the police one night because she thought you got kidnapped- but she went down to ocean and found you there, swimming in the pitch black waves. She literally almost had a heart attack- but she knows better than to stop you. It helps you.

Now your muscles were taught, your personality was back, and you could think clearer than before.

“Im glad your home,” you say softly, putting your head in the crook of his neck.

“When Im with you…. Im home,” he replied, holding you tightly and stroking your hair.

You breathing hitched, hearing these few words that meant everything, but you breathed out again and smiled.

Realization swarmed you, your smile turned straight,, and you pushed off his body. LAnce was shocked and confused, and you shouted, “Where have you been?”

Lance’s blush deepened, and he scratched his neck- “Well, um- its kind of a long sto-”

“Getting busy over there LAnce?” a voice taunted in front of you; the voice was undefiable as male or female- but you recognized it at once.

“Wait is that- PIDGE?”

Part 2 comin soon!